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woahajimes · 2 years

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i’ve never fallen asleep while reading before.

#was reading whats-his-face #dostoevsky.#god i know he's a genius i know he is i know i know #because ive been told #i am reading the dream of a ridiculous man and i wish i understood a single word #guys i fell asleep. ASLEEP.#LIKE. full on honk schmoo honk schmoo mimimimi #SLEEP.#GUYS HOW DO I UNDERSTAND #i think i got past a few pages of the ridiculous man's dream #i wanna read crime and punishment #like my friend (who i very much hate because he is so smart and analytical) (read: stocks) said that he was totally fucking flabbergasted #when he read c&p for the first time #like I REMEMBER THAT FEELING. guys i read a lot when i was a kid #i mean like obviously younger than i am now #but i read a lot lot lot #it helped me inmensely but god i read bullshit #i mean not bullshit obv but that reading hasnt helped me all that much in ways other than english #like im good at writing and i think analyzing? i just need to uderstand.#i think #i have the rise and fall of the third reich for history and good god #it is 1k pages long about a topic i know nothing about. i really am starting from zero but i will read that fucking book even if it kills me #same w/ economics and other stuff #like i dont even hate it i just hate the classes because im so fucking lost #like help they are so painful bc how do they know this shit #anyways tracking back i need to read bu to read i need to sleep so that i can understand thoroughly #but all my other subjects.....#anyways if you read all this tell me your favourite holiday baking. i tried asking customers today and they gave me the blandest answers #choc chip cookies forbidden.

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chloesimaginationthings · 3 days

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The nightmares in FNAF 4 get crazy...

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samipekoe · 5 months

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my beautiful chicken wife

#dungeon meshi #falin touden #spoilers #i fell asleep and forgot to post this so now the read more has 600 notes bc u guys are THIRSTY !!!!

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larkspurglove · 1 month

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Fun fact about the underworld saga:

‘558 men who died under your command’ from The Underworld, combined with ‘43 left under your command’ from Ruthlessness, doesn’t add up to 600 men.

Which means that the guy who fell off Circe’s roof and died is canon to Epic the musical.

Edit: it’s confirmed!

#for context in Homer’s odyssey there was a guy who got really drunk and fell asleep on Circe’s roof the day before they were meant to leave #and when he woke up he forgot he was on the roof of the palace and fell off #and as such broke his neck and died #epic the underworld saga #epic the musical #what the fuck a thousand notes???#I love how many people in the notes are like ‘rip elpenor’ or ‘ELPENOR MENTION‼️‼️’#1k #2k

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teaboot · 1 month

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the little lord is home

#He was really quiet for a while but I talked at him and eventually he started chirping back #I have formula and a bottle and he's due for lunch soon #He's so small guys #His whole body is smaller than my hand #He put his little foot on my finger and fell asleep #Oh my god my son is so tiny #Cat

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heynhay · 11 months

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let's drive out

#klance #voltron #vld #this came to my brain via Valentine Texas by mitski but im not offficially linking it bc i have something dif in mind fpr later #and this one is a faithful visual recreation of the lyrics but not an emotionally faithful one so. i can do better #anyway being taken out to camp in the bed of a pickup truck is like. haha. one of my dark twisted evil romantic fantasies #my country bumpkin upbringing showing through #now you guys know how horrible and wild my unhigned crazy thoughts are...... how unspeakably deranged.....#art #my art #bro im such a fucking faker i will fr get on my soapbox about how often klance fight (even romantically) and then draw the tenderist shit #like 40 times over #so let me amend and clarify by saying this was somehow some stupid shit.#like lance set this up but its because theyve been competing for best date (theres a physical scoreboard on the fridge)#and keith was probably trying to act aloof so that lance wouldnt score as many points #but got so comfy he fell asleep (+15 for lance its going on the scoreboard)#+ lance is abt to sharpie a moustache on his face #mitski

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uncanny-tranny · 7 months

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Whenever people who are entrenched in diet culture talk about how terrible chemicals are, I just want to whip out this:

#diet culture #diet culture tw #described images #image description in alt #'it's got CHEMICALS in it' and so do you! and me too! IT'S ALL CHEMICALS ALL THE WAY DOWN #instead of running from this world we must learn to embrace it #i'm not particularly angry at people who say this because it makes me think that they're incredibly invested in diet culture...#...i just don't want the whole 'food = bad' or 'bodies = bad' to go unchallenged...#...part of the reason why diet culture seems just as prevalent now (if not moreso) is partially because it isn't really...#...challenged or questioned without provocation. it's just assumed to be correct because it makes you 'feel in control'#when chemicals are bad you can control what chemicals you consume. it's individualistic and places the blame onto you for 'being good'#it places responsibility onto the person in such a way that it becomes impossible to fulfill #it isn't that i'm upset that people want to treat their bodies in a way they think is responsible...#...moreso that the *way* they go about it ensures that they're stuck in a cycle of self-blame and even self-hatred #because the METHOD is ineffective. not the desire to treat your body well #also the state of ohio looks stupid and i do Not respect it #it looks like a ball that is simultaneously deflated and over-inflated #also their state flag looks silly to me #it looks like the person who was making it fell asleep making it #i'm just clowning on ohio at this point. have never been to ohio but. are you guys okay

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redhhound · 2 years

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ghost and soap, the meeting on the turret stairs

#redraw of the classic painting meeting on the turret stairs :)#i had this idea last night just before i fell asleep lmfao then had uni today so had to withstand the humiliation of #drawing cod guys in class....#its ok its a bachelor of animation everyone has their own weird ass blorbos #including the tutor who talks about the phantom for 3 hours and then dunks on stan lee for the rest of the class #ghostsoap soapghost #soapghost #ghostsoap #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #mw2 #ghost x soap #soap x ghost #come on man why are there so many tags #LOOK AT MY ART PLEASE PLEASE #redhhound art #gay people #THE ORIGINAL OF THIS PAINTING IS WATERCOLOUR??? OH IM GONNA OFF MYSELF #if this gets reposted on tiktok im gonna kill a 14 year old

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coffee-dere · 5 months

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The brain-rot is terminal please help

#I'm literally dying lmao #(I give up on using the word literally properly)#Coffee's scribbles #basil #Basil omori #Omori #Sillyposting #He's just a little guy #I feel like his RW version fits more but... Well um. Too late?#Fun fact: I fell asleep while drawing this. I was really confused when I woke up. So there's that I guess.#Um... Is there anything else I can tag this as...? I'm still too sleepy for this...

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snugjammies · 11 months

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Older Zuko and Katara telling their kids how they met

Zuko: Y’know, it was really love at first sight.

Katara: *rolls eyes* Absolutely not.

Zuko: I couldn’t stop looking at her.

Katara: I could really feel the chemistry with your glaring.

Zuko: Agni, I was so in love, I followed her across the entire world.

Katara: That’s not why you followed-

Zuko: I took a bolt of lightning for her.

Katara: …

Katara: Yeah, he did.

Zuko: Because I was so completely, irrevocably, permanently, utterly, beyond in love-

#guys i think he’s in love with her🤯#Katara: i married this man for the character arc #the steambabies fell asleep during this lol #brain rot #there’s supposed to be a pride and prejudice reference in there but I forgot the reference💀#zutara #incorrect zutara quotes #incorrect quotes #zuko x katara #avatar the last airbender #steambabies

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kneelingshadowsalome · 1 month

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I know the König x secret admirer reader is not gonna be officially continued but I was wondering if you could maybe explore part of it😭 there’s a part that mentioned that König gets laid in the military and I was wondering how angsty it would be if reader found out?🤭

Yes of course! ^^ It would be angsty... and fluffy! These two are the silliest people who ever lived tbh 🩷🐥

König is young in this AU (around his early 20s) and wildly inexperienced compared to some of the other recruits his age.

His first time was with a girl who joined the army when König had been there for about 1.5 years already. Desperate as he was with hiding the fact that he’s still a virgin, he tumbled into bed with this lady after a night out at the bar. She thoroughly seduced him, and König’s instincts told him she was only looking for fun, but he went with her anyway because, well. Loneliness can kill you, you know?!

He tried to woo her a bit after that until it became quite clear that this woman was not planning to settle down anytime soon. If anything, she was looking for a new conquest – and it’s fine, totally fine, except that König had surrendered a tiny piece of his heart to her along with his dick... That’s just how he is, and it took him more than a few months to get over the fact that it was “just a shag” and he “shouldn’t take things so seriously”.

That’s also why he closed off from people again, decided to concentrate on work and training and gym – until our cute little angel stumbled into his life like the prettiest saving grace! König was a goner from the start because this girl's approach was very different, so gentle and sweet compared to grimy shot glasses and smudgy lipstick and raunchy jokes. It’s a given that he was a little shocked when she sent her that pic 🙄 reminding him of promiscuous women who are not looking for a soul but a body, but because he is what he is the first thing he did was crank things up a notch and send her a dick pic back…

Yes, he’s desperate, but he’s also an go hard or go home man and this time, König is relatively sure he’s dealing with a lovely, delicate soul. Someone who wouldn’t just leave him out in the cold after getting what she wants.

And everything is like a fairytale between these two until she finds out he’s not a virgin despite he seemed a bit… like one… (in this scenario I think reader is a virgin and she thought König was one too because of obvious reasons? lol) And it’s fine, totally fine for her as well, except that the image of König having the night of his life with some military babe is haunting her from dusk till dawn.

There’s bound to be some drama when she starts asking timidly whether she’s still there… Whether they see each other every day. If they talk to each other, if he trains with her, etc. What if they test rifles together, or go out again with the sniper crew and get drunk and König feels… a little lonely?

She knows he would never cheat on her, not in a million years, but knowing how much of a wet dog he is she can’t promise that she’ll be all calm and relaxed during weekends, knowing her boyfriend is out there, full of testosterone and heart, his heart somewhat susceptible to female influence… Maybe even good old seduction…

And what’s even worse is the jealousy, the envy.

What if she’s more badass than her? That doesn't take much... She must be fierce if she’s in the military, something completely different, a forbidden apple König might want to taste again. It’s maddening, and when she finally opens up about it to him, spitting it out one night when he asks what’s bugging his sweet angel, there’s a big fat silence that follows.

König can't even believe she has torn her heart to pieces over something like this, alone and upset and ashamed when she's a literal angel. He sits her nice and pretty in his lap and talks her ear off about how he has nothing against this woman, truly, but that she is nothing compared to his first (and hopefully last!) girlfriend. Their love could never be compared to what happened between him and that girl, these things can’t even be spoken together in the same sentence. If he’s completely honest, his first time was... disappointing. Awkward, humbling, a total drunken mess of which he remembers nothing except that the woman wasn’t completely present either and that he was ashamed that his first time had to be like this.

Honestly, he felt like he lost his virginity on the night when he came to see her. She’s everything he’s ever dreamed of, all he thinks about these days... It’s quite annoying, actually, because he’s supposed to concentrate on how the wind blows and that the ammo doesn’t get wet and that he’s properly concealed.

He could be lying in a ditch with dummy rounds whirling past him and all he could think about are her eyes and lips and giggling and tits and, and… that. How warm it is, how nice it is, how he would just want to curl himself next to her when he hops back to his bunk in the evening. Her smile is the last thing he sees before he dreams, her voice is what he hears. All the things she said, all those sweet, silly little things, chime in his ear before he sleeps.

And all the precious moments they’ve already spent together, the times he made love to her under the trees... There’s nothing like that in the whole world and if she thinks something else can top that she's even sillier than he thought. He could comb through all the continents and he would never find a girl like her.

So tell him again... Why would he go to a shot glass of saltwater when he has a jar of wild honey right here at home?

#lmao what könig doesn’t tell her probablyyy is that the lady is not interested in him either #she just hops from D to D so she barely remembers König even exists #he’s only a co-star in some stories she tells her friends #like “Ooh yeah that one guy had a horse cock but he fussed around with the condom so much I almost fell asleep haha”#“what was his name again? shit I can’t remember”#meanwhile our angel reader is ascending to the 7th plane with the help of the horse cock in question like “Köniii T^T”#always the funniest thing when a secret admirer gets jealous of his object of obsession who’s actually fucking enamored with their no 1 fan #König gets jettisoned to the sun everytime she so much as *looks* his way #like are you both completely utterly dense or were you just born this way…#<3 sillies

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ledzeppelinmixtape · 9 months

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wish house was a real doctor so i could be his mystery insomniac patient and after giving me horse tranquilizers and still not falling asleep he just hits me in the head with his cane and im out like a light

#house md #i was supposed yo be asleep 2 hrs ago cause i planned to get up very early to study but LMAO NO #as soon as i shut my eyes my chest felt like it was being ripped to shreds from anxiety. i love i love it i love it (←says guy who hates it #anyways. i got mad i cried i googled some things frantically and now im in an acceptance phase of 'it is what it is' ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯#i think the thing that makes me the most frustrated is that. i slept like shit last night. like 4hrs maybe!!!! total!!! and so by the time #i started studying today around 6:30 i was eepy. and then by 7:15 my eyes were sooo heavy so i decided to take a 15 min power nap #and i was DREAMING within minutes. i fell asleep that quick. such a deep sleep that my alarm scared me awake #but ofc when im like oh teehee ill go to bet hella early and wake up hella early my brain is like ? no.#if youre still reading. idk im kissing you on the mouth or something. thanks for being here 🫶#gonna start tagging these posts as #insomnia chronicles

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sparklecarehospital · 6 months

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