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lonelysucker7 · 4 months

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Cigarettes out the Window

Pairing: Kaine Parker/Louise Kennedy

Summary: Based on the comic “Spider-Man: The Lost Years” (Specifically issue #3). Kaine Parker remembers his intimate time with detective Louise Kennedy and those cigarettes she never stopped smoking.

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: Heavy angst, mentions of death, mentions of violence, drug references

Not proofread. Wanted to make this after I got inspired by a song. Is it a song fic? Not really, but you could feel the references in here. The fic no one asked but the one I needed haha.

Enjoy!

………………………………………………………………………….

Kaine grew accustomed to the smell of cigarette smoke over the years.

Everywhere he walked, his nose caught the scent of burn wafting in the air from someone smoking in a dark corner. Or someone dangling their hand mindlessly out the window with the stick in their fingers as he swinged through the city.

But every once and then on the top of a rooftop, the highest there could be in Houston he would stare up in the night sky watching the stars glow. And its beauty becomes interrupted by the smell of smoke.

Even at the highest peak, it was always there.

She was there. Louise Kennedy.

A blur of memories that came back to him even in his sleep, startled him awake and he gasped her name out. His mind raced and his eyes searched the darkness of the hotel room and found nothing. Heard nothing.

Kaine would check on the sleeping Aracely, making sure she was alright and unharmed. Then he would leave to hang out on the balcony, taking an overview of the city lights go on and off like little flames in the night.

Nothing would beat their glow except the moon, the stars, the sun and a lighter.

In his own silence he thinks back to those many years ago…

………………………………………………………………………….

“Louise, why do you smoke?”

The half dressed blonde woman looks back over her shoulder towards the man on the couch who called for her attention. Her pink lips stretched to a friendly smile.

“They calm me down from my high. Or at least, feed more pleasure to it.”

The man nods a little, processing her words carefully. He thinks back to their shared kisses of intimacy and the tongue in his mouth swirls a little inside, tasting the faint flavor of smoke. It was sweet and sour.

His mind snaps back to reality as the couch sinks a little and the weight of Louise’s body acknowledges her presence. He can feel himself starting to smile as her head rests on his shoulder. He watches the way her lips move around the stick adjusting it to comfort, and her nose exhaling the smoke from there.

The way she does these things, it’s strange and amusing to him almost. But he can’t help but wrinkle his nose a little and lift a hand to rub the smell away. This action catches Louise’s attention and she leans away from him slightly.

“Oh, sorry about that Kaine.” Her hand comes up to remove and burn out the cigarette on the tray, but her wrist is grabbed gently by him. Kaine shakes his head and assures her.

“Don’t mind me ruining your moment. I’ll get used to it in time.” He offers a faint smile to her. Louise smirks a little in return and she nods, feeling his hand carefully pull away from hers. She drags another bit of the cigarette in her mouth and exhales slowly, letting out a soft giggle.

Louise reaches again for her cigarette and she turns to Kaine, raising it up to him. He eyes it curiously, the smoke following its swift trail behind it. Kaine gets the hint she wants him to try it out. With the back of his hand, he pushes it away from him and says,

“No thank you. I… I don’t like it.”

Louise raises an eyebrow, making a face that she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“How could you not like it?”

“Don’t really like the essence of it.”

“So you’ve never tasted it?”

“Never.” Kaine raises an eyebrow as she scoffs in response. She inhaled the smoke again and exhales it with a sigh. She says,

“Everyone smokes here. Am I supposed to believe that easily you don’t?”

Kaine snorts lightly. “I’m not like anyone else.”

Louise rolls her eyes a bit, and she waves him dismissively. She shifts in her seat and amusingly says, “How many times will you go on saying that?”

Kaine shrugs, pushing some of his curls closer to his face almost creating a curtain between him and Louise. He mumbled, “As much as I need to remind… myself.”

Louise sighs a little bit more loudly, and she gets on the couch to sit up on her knees. Her hands trail up to his arm and she leans closer to him. Kaine could smell her perfumed scent mixed in with the smoke, as he closed his eyes when he heard her soft honeyed voice near his ear.

“You're right. Remind yourself that. But let me add that it’s because you’re unique. Much more than anyone else here. You’re my one in a million.”

Louise's warm hands moved around his body, snaking her arms around him. In the gentle embrace Kaine leaned more into her and let himself be comforted. The tension in his body became relaxed and both him and Louise leaned back on the couch together. He rested his head on her chest, listening to the calm heartbeat and breathing of her smoking.

The dark room is silent for a moment as he breaks it with a soft monotone voice.

“I think I’ll try it out sometime these days. Smoking.”

He feels Louise’s hand pat him lovingly on his back. A soft chuckle rumbles from her.

“Whatever you say sweetheart. I’ll be here for your first.”

………………………………………………………………………….

On the night of her funeral, Kaine did everything in his power to avoid attending. But after everything, after murdering her it was hard not to go back. A final goodbye at least.

For the night he crashed (literally) in her apartment. Kaine remembered how he slept on the couch that night, afraid to go to her room and not find her there despite knowing she was gone.

Everywhere the lingering smell of cigarettes and Louise’s sweet perfume held him on a chokehold. The room illuminated with the glow of the moon, keeping him both awake and asleep.

Eventually he walked to the curtains and closed them completely, leaving him and the darkness in each other's company.

Kaine stared at nothing in the darkness as his tears streamed down the sides of his face. No sound was uttered as he cried and he could feel himself falling apart by the minute. So much for being one in a million. At this moment he had wished Louise pulled the trigger of the gun on him.

The weight of her betrayal was still fresh in his mind as her facade fell and became the monster he overlooked. Her twisted heart capable of fooling a love to a monster left him so blind and vulnerable. And yet in his mind he still insisted he was something, anything to her. She did spare him. She really did…And both paid the price for their faults.

Her screams couldn’t leave his mind as she struggled violently to be let go of his hold, her back pushing against his chest. He recalled his nose burying near her hair as he smelled her one more time. And the feeling of her delicate neck breaking and burning in his hands was a brutal reminder of the horrible joy he got from relieving the burden Louise had become to him. The many times he kissed that neck and face he never saw what the outcome would be in the end for those parts.

Now he knew.

………………………………………………………………………….

He left her place the moment the funeral had passed, bothering to clean up whatever mess he left. Underneath the couch he picked out the pack of cigarettes that she must have dropped and become lost.

Mindlessly he shoved those in his back pocket. And checked the place once again. And left.

Atop the buildings he ran and jumped, the rain crashing down to hit him in the face like a whip. Remembering when he first arrived in Utah, the first thing he saw was the graveyard. Not like it mattered to him at the time, only imagining what he would be like dead in one of those places.

For Louise to make it her final resting place was no surprise. How she died could have ended up differently.

He would have preferred her death to be the hand of her own smoking addiction. Get lung cancer once she aged. One where she’d be a dead woman walking.

Living, but dying.

At last he arrived at the graveyard, and he wasted no time walking around each place to find her name. He could have laughed if he realized it should have been obvious which one was hers. Everyone had their own set of flowers, dead and alive.

Louise Kennedy, had none.

Stopping in front of her, he slowly felt his chest swell up with the bubbling feeling of guilt and anger. It was pathetic and almost pitiful to see how her area was completely empty. Maybe she had no family close to her mourning for her. He didn’t sit down on the ground, instead squatting and hunched over as the rain poured down on his head. Kaine didn’t say a word, and just lowered his eyes feeling incapable of reading her name carved on the headstone.

His legs and body began to hurt from the position he was on and he decided to sit in the moist ground. He felt everything soak him up. His face was becoming wet and he couldn’t tell which of the wetness between the rain and his tears were.

Oddly, it was warm.

In his seat he shifted a little as his eyebrow raised when he felt something discomforting from behind his pants. Pulling it out, a shaky breath exhaled from his mouth. His chest hurt even more now that he was holding something very close to the person that once lived: Her pack of cigarettes.

The box was warm in the grip of his hand. Maybe he didn’t bring flowers but he brought her favorite thing. His silence and the soft trickle of rain hitting the ground were present in the background as he kept staring at the box. The edge of his thoughts kept insisting him to do something right now. In that instant an idea popped in his mind. He stared at the ground of her grave and back at the small pack and a startling giggle escaped his lips.

He remembered how he never really tried his first cigarette. She said she would be witness. And here they were: together again. Such a perfect final goodbye for them both. Shaking the box to his ear to listen if there was enough, he gritted his teeth in satisfaction. He turns to her grave and a rough mock in his tone rings out.

“Share a final smoke with me, Louise. You said you were gonna see me. Now watch.”

Staring at the pack he turned it in his hand noting the wrinkles on the surface. He paused when he noticed a faint pink smudge, and dented teeth on the side. The pad of his thumb traced there a little, feeling the small bumps underneath his fingertip. The pink smudge spread slightly to the right.

Lipstick.

Perhaps her hands were busy at the time and must have held the box in between her teeth. Well no more of that now. Shaking the box, two cigarettes dropped out onto his palm and he pulled out a lighter he had found on a nearby counter.

He ignited the lighter to life with a shaky thumb, taking a couple tries to make the spark. The open flame flickered in and out from the rain that crossed its way. Nearing both cigarette tips, they gently began to burn red and smoke emitted from them.

He closed the cap and tossed it aside on the ground near her headstone. With both sticks in his fingers, he shifted in his seat on the ground. He raised one towards his lips, muttering,

“One for me…”

His chapped lips wrapped around the stick, adjusting them comfortably with a small roll.

“…And one for you.”

He stretched forward and jabbed the cigarette in the middle of the dirt as it stared upwards. Sad quiet eyes watched it fight, keeping itself burning, but the weight of the rain was too much. The stick slowly shrunk down in the dirt, unable to keep its shape intact. The faint sizzle of the stick began to wane, the smoke whipping in the wind.

In an instant… The burn was gone.

Too bad.

Now it was his turn.

Carefully he took a slow drag of the cigarette with a pucker, closing his eyes as the smoke of nicotine settled in his lungs. The rich and nasty flavor settled on his tongue like nothing. The familiar taste of her kiss instantly coming back to him and his eyes watered. The rain pattered on his hair heavily, matting down his curls and they stuck on his breaking skin. His breathing ragged a little, already feeling the pinch on his throat and lungs at the same time, and his hands dug the soft earth beneath him.

A haze moved in his mind, almost leaving him in a trance like state. He lolls his head to the side and his eyes read the letters on the headstone.

R…I…P…L…O…U…I..—

“ARGH—!”

Kaine’s body aggressively recoils forward as the cellular degeneration kicks in, and his mouth drops the cigarette onto the ground. His hands reached up to his face, gripping his cheeks as he felt the skin stretch and rip a little apart. He lets out a bloodcurdling scream as the pain of smoke in his lungs and throat adds to his trigger. It burned and cooled, like chewing a mint gum and drinking water. He chokes out his tears, coughing out and huffing as much fresh air he can to ease his pain. His sight keeps being blurred by a mix of his tears and the rain.

His eyes keep darting at her headstone, and he shuffles desperately forward quickly pressing his face on the surface of it. He felt the coldness sink calmly onto his skin, wishing for her warm arms to wrap around him. Just like she always did.

Please… please Louise…

The rain kept on and the rumble of thunder came and went from time to time.

The pain eventually left, and he was left in a mess of grime, dirt, blood, and the taste of smoke. Gently he pulls himself away from the headstone and moves back, gritting his teeth feeling his bones shake inside him.

The feeling of wanting to go home ached immensely. But what home? After this what now? Questions he would soon have to respond on his own with any hope he had left. And that was the problem. He hoped too much.

Kaine pushed himself up from the ground, staggering back with a groan. His eye catches the box of cigarettes on the ground, sticks spilled and stained with dirt from his thrashing.

He didn’t know what to do except push the box near her grave and with the heel of his foot, started grinding it down. And he kept doing it and doing it and doing it, a new found rage burning again. He never liked them anyway. He probably never will. His mind rushed in an angry thrill,

I hate you I hate you I hate you—!

“…I-I love you.”

Hurriedly he pushes the dirt and grass onto the cigarettes, burying them and flats it out as if nothing had happened. And he turned away from Louise’s grave, not wanting to look at her again. He walks away with the bitter taste of her cigarette on his tongue. The rain settled down to a quiet drizzle, the peppered stars on the night sky twinkling.

She will never leave his mind. If there was smoke, she would be there.

Always.

#kaine parker #Louise Kennedy #I hope i didn’t make anyone cry #I cried writing this hahah #writers on tumblr #writer #I said “frick hw I wanna do this instead.#No I don’t smoke #Don’t do drugs kids #I had to look up people smoking and hear them talk about their experience #Ik this is the least ship anyone wanted but it’s the one I needed to be explored a little #Angst #death mention tw #tw violence #tw drugs #Oh by experience I mean like how do cigarettes taste like and all that #Smoking has a new meaning to me now #spider man #It’s just only brief in the beginning that’s why and the rest is just what happened afterwards #Did I even explore the relationship? I’m starting to think not really #This fic is NOT canon to the story I repeat it’s just a FANFIC #marvel comics #Also teeny reference to the lovely #aracely penalba #Spider-Man: The Lost Years #Louise Kennedy/Kaine Parker

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questionablemuses · 2 months

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@peppy-jester || ( x )

Mammon's face fell as soon as that "Excuse me?' left Fizzarolli's lips. He didn't think he was being funny? Oh, right.

Fizz must've gotten his memories back. He had a feeling that was why his beloved jester started acting so different around him the past few days. Was he really despised that much even after everything they've done together under their new contract?

Showing Fizzarolli a vulnerable side of him was probably a mistake.

" ... I'm not jokin', Fizzie." Tone is quiet, uncharacteristically unsure of how to proceed. A hand lifts to rub the back of his neck, glancing away for a moment. "I wouldn't joke about this." He pauses, taking a step back.

"Look, I know we had a rough past & I may've went a bit too far with everythin', but this. Us ? I wouldn't trade it for anythin'."

Lips twitch slightly, Mammon still giving Fizz some space. "I know I can't compete with ... him. Look, what I'm tryin' t' say is, as much as it fuckin' pains me —— I'll let you go back."

#( .closed. )#( my eye is killing me rn )#( but I wanted to get this out at least! )#( hahah pain. :') )#⋆I've always loved you. Just realized too late. - Mammon/Fizzarolli♡#peppy jester #muse; Mammon

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grayloch · 9 months

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My attack and revenge on @pantamonte I love doing these

#demon #art fight #artfight #art fight 2023 #team werewolves #loch draws #artist on tumblr #art #ah this was fun I hope you wouldnt mind seeing me again next year i wanna attack at least one more hahah #illustration

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magicwhiskers29 · 6 months

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Happy Flora Friday! Here's some drawings for what's been occupying my brain recently! (It's Flora if she was on the Boiling Isles... Extra thoughts under the cut)

Okay! To be clear, this isn't a toh au in the sense that I've dropped Flora in the story of toh, more so just in the world. So why the tracks I picked?

Plant was sort of the obvious one, because of how it lines up well with the whole Golden Apple thing... Additionally, it could be a family thing, with Flora's mother having liked. (Lady Violet/Viola being her name, so...) It also makes her relationship with it later more interesting - she doesn't like having to be the Golden Apple, so having the type of magic that would come most naturally to her be something so intrinsically related to that would push her to study more and want to learn other tracks of magic.

Illusions? It's a good one for her to get into and study herself, and it lines up well with her first appearances in CV. She's running around disguised, following them from the shadows, something which she continues to do, as well, and it's a good magical substitute for that. It just seemed fitting. Vibes, and all that.

Flora would have an interesting relationship with abomination magic too, considering how easy it would be for abominations to act as a substitute for robots. I don't know if I've considered this AU enough to say that St. Mystere is definitely filled with abominations rather than robots (covering that up would be a lot more difficult, though illusion magic is a thing), but it's an interesting comparison that Flora could absolutely make herself. I also think she could be interested in other applications of abomination magic outside of uh, literally just abominations (Think Blight Industries tech kind of stuff) later on. I like the idea of Flora taking an interest in mechanics post-canon, so that fits.

Other points of interest: I think something fun could be Flora's bad cooking skills being replaced with her being bad at potion magic, potentially. I just think her trying to learn that rather than literal cooking and still having it turn out disastrously is a fun idea! More chaotic, too, and kind of funny considering potion track is the one most people without a specific focus on other types of magic are in. (I.E. Eda and Lilith being in it pre-Emperor's Coven tryouts and Hunter pretending to be part of it ASIAS.)

I've had palismen ideas, but none solid enough for an actual design... Oh, and her magic's a reddish colour because I'm a fan of when it matches the character's eye colour, haha. Obviously, this isn't entirely consistent with the show (Amity and Gus's magic matches their track colour, for instance, and other characters sometimes just match their track and eyes like Eda and Willow), but I don't personally feel like green particularly fits Flora, and this is a personal preference thing...

I'll probably come back to this au at some point (hence giving it its own tag) because toh never leaves my brain haha. I'll definitely take asks on the matter too ;)

#professor layton #flora reinhold #art #fanart #Flora friday #whiskers draws #the owl house #toh #curious village spoilers #toh spoilers #england is in the boiling isles ig pl-toh au #for the record flora is only in a hexside uniform because it makes it easy for me to show what types of magic flora is proficcient #no i don't know where this idea came from either it just hit me and i loved it #the audience for this is definitely going to be very niche hahah but it had been inhabiting my brain fr #help river i did it again and made another toh au (at least this time it's not quite the same as how i usually do it?)

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cheemken · 6 months

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For smth that looks simple why tf is Diantha's hair so hard to draw

#like???#idk is it a skill issue on my part???#maybe hahah #to anyone who draws dias hair well just how??#like pls at least give me tips🥹 hahah #did yall sell your soul or smth #man i swear if i get to draw dias hair well soon id lose the ability to draw smth else #it's always like this fr #could draw pkmn and animals and even backgrounds well back then but couldnt draw people well #and now i can draw people well and lost the ability to draw animals and backgrounds #where is the justice in that man😭#random bs

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mildmayfoxe · 9 months

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hahaha hey you guys guess what. you'll never believe it. got the guy who's in charge of my fraud case on the phone and he was like "who'd you give one-time security codes to yesterday" and i was like "the guy who called me from the fraud department after they noticed a weird login in florida??" and he was like "that was the fuckin hacker. you got got. IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!" i handed my entire savings over to a fucking guy on the phone on a silver platter. like some kind of fuckin rube. bro

#IT IS OK THOUGH I HAVE BEEN SORTING IT OUT #account is LOCKED DOWN! card is DELETED! fraud paperwork has been FILED! i have requested a fraud alert AND credit freeze #from the NATIONAL CREDIT BUREAU!#a friend of mine is taking me to MAINE next saturday to go to the BANK! i sent an email to my landlord asking if i can pay rent by CHECK!#i went to my other bank and deposited my BONDS! so i have some MONEY! to pay RENT!#i also got a new debit card from them. and made sure i could use my old checks.#i also bought some STAMPS while i was out and a BIRTHDAY PRESENT for a FRIEND #now i am going to start switching over some auto deposits #so when i get my paycheck on tuesday i will actually get it.#i feel so STUPID but i think i have done all i can to fix this. i am feeling better about it #by next weekend i will have my money again. it's all fine #and hopefully next time i will not get got so easily. lol.#anyway dont get got by people pretending to be your bank i guess. i did think it was weird how many questions they asked but..#they ALWAYS ask lots of questions at the bank!!!!!#i got a text message FROM the bank saying they would be calling me soon and then the next call was from the scammer #and then like a half hour later got one from the bank and was confused bc they'd just 'called me'#anyway. it'll be fine. scary for a while but at least i have things i can do to make it better. it's all good #genuinely feeling like i ought to take out like a thousand bucks cash and keep it in my desk to replace my bonds tho tbh hahah #just in case something like this happens again. you never know. what would i have done if i DIDNT have those yknow #ok thank u all for being along on this journey with me

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thewhimsicalenderdragon · 2 months

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little comic I made on paper!

transcript:

I send a video, because I was comparing my gf and I to skephalo but more wholesome (less wholesome actually but we argue less lol)

Ender (me) : I 100 percent would put you in a hole and keep giving you false hope that I’m going to let you out.

Ender (me) : UH

Ender (me) : …why did that sound sus…

Spooder (my gf): o deer haha

Ender (me): WHY DID THAT SOUND SUS (bc I’m dirty minded ;-;)

Spooder: (my gf): AH. I’m just worried

Spooder (my gf) : that you’ll uh, trap me in a hole.

Spooder: (my gf) o deer. That does sound sus.

Ender (me) *screaming at the top of my lungs*

this is a real actual interaction I had with my gf over text. It was. Memorable, to say the least.

huh. I wish we had a ship name lol

#look i made a thing!#ender arts #art #my sona #my persona #sona art #my gfs sona #Comic #mini comic #this really happened #Why does she put up with me #O deer #Well at least I know I’m not boring #I’m too deranged to be #B o r I n g #:>#HAHAH #I mentioned #Skephalo

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vrgssmncht · 5 months

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Heyyy Art vs Artist thingy! Finally did it after skipping it last year!

Last year!

So much has changed woah.. I was so neat.. I mean look at that lack of background ah..

What important is that it's still very buggy hellyeah

I guess new year resolution to explore more art media! And other stuff!

#fuck my hair maaaaaan #aaaaaAAAAA #anyways #art vs artist #art #insects #uuuh #me #2023 #2022 #at least I'm not as depressed anymore hahah #they really made me normify my hair #one day.. one day....

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chiptrillino · 1 year

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Okay, if you think Jee is superstitious and judgy once you get to know him, what do you think he's like when he's DRUNK? He's a sailor so his tolerance must be crazy high, but is he a sassy drunk? A bar brawling drunk? A weirdly nice and affectionate drunk?

TW: mention of alcohol or getting drunk

apart of being a sailor he is a FIREBENDING SAILOR. basically it takes him more to get drunk for him. i think (headcanon?) but he does get drunk! i think he is more acting on his impulsive thoughts drunk. like he gets a new tattoo, that one dude that pissed him off all night deserves jee's fist in his face. (which... also gets him also a new tattoo kind of)

if he is out with crew they place a dare on him and he acts on it.

i think he earns most of his drinks by playing some music. there is a pippa in h bars sometimes. he grabs it stimms it begins to play. sailor songs and dirty songs and some made out of the spot. depends how many drinks he gets.

idk... full out bar brawls depend on if one of his crew is misbehaving or being threatend. (yes even including the royal bratty shoutyness)

i do think some of the crew thought once to take zuko out and get him drunk. you know maybe he shouts less? could be funny? (i admit they don't have the nicest intentions...i don't think everyone on zukos ship was nice. some were, others are in the gray aeria. but i think some were awful and had to be sorted out first) but jee put his foot down like "no what the fuck i hate this shouty brat too but he is a kid!!!" zuko is compleatly safe but i think it would be funny if jee drinks the crew that was in on this under the table (with thanks of subtle bending) and makes them clean the deck and the hull with small brushes the next morning while they struggle with a hangover. (zuko non the wiser but for once confused quiet letting jee handle it. iroh argreeing with that punishment.)

i don't think jee is much of a flirt. if he gets hitted on he would fluster. its amusing to watch! this big muscly guy visibly shuddering and kind of stoic shy. not used to flirting a bit akward. bt he has sill gets his nights out. and a happy whisteling walk to the ship with a skip in his step the next morning. jee may or may not once wasn't allowed back on board because the royal brat had no clue about hickeys and confused them with septabox. iroh: you know prince zuko... when a man finds a lovely person and they spend the night- (surviving getting 'the talk' by the dragon of the west is a special kind of bonding expirence, jee and zuko quietly agree on to never bring up again)

but hey in the off chance jee gets hungover and they are in the middle of the ocean. you get to observe jee, after port leave, butt naked laid out on the hot metal cooking his headache out. it is a compleatly normal view. you hear a *ding* and the lieutenant flips over for evenly gold brown roasting.

#tw: alcohol #tw: alchohol mention #chip!ask #atla #jee #lieutenant jee #listen i may already... had thoughts aobut this...#idk nights out sound fun hahah #just silly stuff happening #and akward mornings #i do think fire nation has no problem with nuditiy though. at least commoners #fight me on that!#jee suns when he has the oportunity!

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