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#first story i've written in about 8 years lol
nevesmose · 1 month
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Syndroma Holmiensis
Things are different now. That was the last advice Mikulin's father had given him. The Imperium is the biggest gang on the whole planet. The Night Haunter's gang. Stick with them and you'll do fine, son.
His father had lost an eye in a streetfight years ago and the bribe to fit an augmetic was far beyond their means. Mikulin tried to focus twice as much on the other eye instead, solid depthless black like those of every other Nostraman, as it gleamed with something like desperation combined with raw avarice.
Was it hope, he wondered? Something so rare on the Sunless World that they'd had to steal the Gothic word to describe it exactly. Whatever sibiliant kennings and poetic phrases his ancestors had used to subtly imply the possibility of a better future were gone now. Inefficient in comparison to the language of their new overlords.
Most of the time Mikulin found it hard to care overmuch. His ancestors had mined adamantium and murdered one another in the dark for century upon century and achieved nothing. Built nothing. Created nothing but further generations of void-eyed killers.
Until the Night Haunter came. He who flayed and freed Nostramo, pinned the planet down and eviscerated it inch by inch, block by block, heart by heart and corpse by corpse until nothing was left but order and a full stomach.
Mikulin loved the Night Haunter. Mikulin feared the Night Haunter.
It was natural for him to hold both thoughts simultaneously. He loved and feared his father too, didn't he? A strong provider, working shifts in the mine when the work was there and doing what he had to when it wasn't. But also a monster when he'd been paid and given the money straight back to the company bar.
When he was old enough to work they moved to the nearest great city, Nostramo Secundus. Dear Grey Place, the Adamantite City, a hive built into a vast outcropping of ore-bearing rock that jutted out into the roiling black ocean.
His father had called it a promotion, but the truth came out eventually. The mine bosses were scared that his drunken actions, his too-public offences against the new rules of society, would bring the Night Haunter to them. And the Night Haunter rarely found just one criminal worthy of punishment when paying a visit.
Far safer, therefore, to send the problem away into the teeming masses of the nearest hive city. Losing the work had destroyed his father but Secundus gave Mikulin a new razorgang to run with and all the freedom he was brave enough to steal. And he had the Night Haunter to thank for it.
Mikulin loved the Night Haunter. Mikulin feared the Night Haunter.
Mikulin cared little and knew less of the other demigods who had come later, surrounded by an inferno of blinding light and guarding their father the Emperor. Such events, occurring so far away in the capital, were of little importance to remote grey Secundus. Only the Night Haunter mattered because time and distance meant nothing to him. He could be anywhere on Nostramo, seeing and hearing all in his domain and dispensing punishment to the high and the low alike.
Mikulin loved the Night Haunter. Mikulin feared the Night Haunter.
Then the news reached Secundus that the Night Haunter had left to join his father and brothers in conquering the galaxy for humanity. Mikulin had looked up at the coldly glinting stars and felt a twist of envious fury in his gut. They had taken Nostramo's king from his people and wouldn't even use his name.
Konrad Curze, the Emperor had called him. An alien name from an alien being. Mikulin knew it was the Night Haunter who Nostramo's first Astartes followed into the void, him and no other.
They had tested Mikulin once for suitability. Just put your hand in the box on the servitor's chest. A brief sting and a few moments later the verdict was given - negative. Elevated hereditary cancer risk and other minor genetic flaws not meeting the threshold of mutation, the magos biologis announced before moving on to the next prospective recruit.
Stick with the Night Haunter's gang, his father had said. So Mikulin had apprenticed himself to the Administratum, serving the new Planetary Governor appointed in the Night Haunter's place. One of the first natives to join, they said.
Natives grated in his mind like two ends of a broken bone. We weren't natives before you came, before you took him away. We were ourselves. But things are different now.
The first time he really saw offworlders up close he'd just about managed not to stare, or grimace in the closed-off Nostraman way which, to the initiated, was just as expressive as a scream. Someone has put coins in your eyes, he'd thought irrationally, or broken glass in different colours. It happened sometimes as punishment for people who sold out their gangmates or saw things they shouldn't have.
It took him a long while to accept that it was just how they were, the same way they walked the street wrong, slowly, looking at the sights around them like prey. Behaving like that would get a Nostraman killed but, collectively, there seemed to be an indulgence for offworlders.
They didn't know what the people said or thought about them and they didn't have to care. Often Mikulin found himself hating them, hating their accents and their language at the same time as he learned to mimic both to rise up in their organisation.
The outsiders planned great things for Nostramo in the Imperium. We can make this world so much better, someone with eyes the colour of ice melting into slush told him. Mikulin said nothing.
They built Nostramo Secundus a botanical garden to rival any city in the Imperium. A vast adamantium-ribbed dome of glass filled with a kaleidoscope of verdant colour and shape tended by specialised horticultural servitors, the whole edifice illuminated by numberless ultraviolet and visible-spectrum lamps to allow the plantlife to thrive even on the Sunless World.
On the wall surrounding their creation, where Mikulin had to pass every day to reach the Administratum complex, the offworlders had commissioned some famed remembrancer to paint a mural of a lush, rolling Terran landscape lit by a rising sun and bearing the title LET NOSTRAMO FLOURISH.
The people of Nostramo Secundus hated it and the building it adorned. The cost of entry was high enough to exclude all but the wealthiest and every Nostraman visitor had to wear thick eyeshades or else suffer hours of headache and near-blindness, all just to look at plants. Mystifying.
Mikulin had access to the records of just how much power, water and heat the gardens drew away from the rest of the city. How many hab-tenements could the same resources support instead? He had calculated it once on a scrap of parchment and the answer sickened him.
The Night Haunter would have judged the creation in an instant, razed it to the ground and impaled the builders among the wreckage. Eventually Mikulin came to realise that the gardens were never really intended for him or any other native, only to improve the lot of the offworlders condemned to serve the Imperium on dark forbidding Nostramo.
Once, without thinking, he'd saluted an Administratum superior in the Nostraman way, hand clawed over his heart to say may it be torn out if I am untrue. The condescension and pity in their eyes had struck him like a physical blow.
Damn you all, he thought, eyes stinging with a shame he couldn't begin to process. Take your costume-jewellery eyes and your costume-jewellery Imperium and leave us alone like we always should have been. Our world was already better. We were already better.
Mikulin loved the Night Haunter. Mikulin feared the Night Haunter.
Mikulin grew old slowly, the decay held back by juvenats and technology for as long as the Administratum had the budgetary headroom to provide. Nostramo seemed to rot quickly in comparison. The nobility and oligarchs reappeared with new names and faces but the same blood in their veins, the same corruption in their hearts, and no Night Haunter any more to excise them like a chirurgeon.
He didn't remember exactly when it happened, but one work cycle he realised that the Imperium was no longer the biggest gang on the planet. Work orders, requisitions, suicide statistics, every item of paperwork that used to filter upwards to the Administratum had slowed to a trickle and eventually just stopped.
Mikulin continued to attend the office and the Administratum continued to pay him, but in reality the alternative government of the gangs and nobles had slipped into place like a knife between ribs to quietly usurp both their functions.
Eventually the last offworlders left Secundus. No one would say whether it was voluntary. Their replacements were black-eyed and loyal only to the shifting politics of the warlords they followed. They funnelled the city's sparse resources to pay debts and shore up alliances before the newer, hungrier gangs overthrew them and were consumed in turn by their own children in the incestuous reproductive cycle that was as irredeemably Nostraman as the smog filling up their lungs.
Through it all, Mikulin of the Administratum was present, observed and said nothing. They treated him with something like respect - that rarest of things, an elderly Nostraman.
In the end it was Mikulin who finally closed down the botanical gardens. Let the plants rot and the gangs split the proceeds however they pleased. He left and went back to his tenement, hobbling slowly the same way he did everything else now, and went past that accursed mural once again.
It had been smashed and defaced countless times, the people of Nostramo Secundus giving vent to their fury at the image of an idyllic fantasy they would never possess. The rising sun was blotted out by an arterial splash of black paint and, above it all, someone had scrawled new blood-red lettering to change the painting's title.
LET NOSTRAMO PERISH.
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syrikif · 7 months
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Gamer Etiquette
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Kodzuken x Streamer!Y/N
Pairing: Kenma Kozume x Fem!Reader
Genre: SMAU + Written, Strangers to Lovers, Romance, Fluff, Humor, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Streamer/Youtuber AU
Content Warnings: Sexual jokes/content, mention of death threats, mature language
Upcoming content creator/streamer, Y/N, has gone viral for lots of things. Her infamous dumb moments, her blended cookie recipe (which tastes better than it sounds), the way she rages at her friends during games, and about a hundred more.
But her most recent viral moment? Accidentally knocking famous streamer, Kodzuken, off the Bedwars map and making him lose his two year winning streak.
Now with more attention (and hate) than she ever asked for, her only option left is to go to the source: the man himself, Kenma Kozume.
Created: October 6, 2023 Completed: (Ongoing) Update Schedule: I’m currently in the process of moving so just whenever I can :)
Masterlist:
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Important Profiles: Y/N's Group Kenma's Group Prologue: Daddy Kink Cat Distribution System Chapter 1: Thirst Trap Hospital Food Chapter 2: Bedwars 🖊 Boredom 🖊 Chapter 3: Trending One Game Chapter 4: Calm Guilt 🖊 Chapter 5: Unhinged One in a Million Chapter 6: Cuddle Buddies 🖊 Casual Chapter 7: Rating The Cat Girl Chapter 8: A Dozen Men Little Things 🖊 Chapter 9: Scaredy Kitten Disappearing Act Chapter 10: Chapter 11: tbc . . .
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Author's Notes:
Hey guys! This is my first post on Tumblr and the first SMAU I've ever written. Which, kudos to everyone else who makes SMAU's because they are a lot of work.
Just some basic info before you begin reading:
Y/N uses she/her pronouns and is feminine presenting.
Every chapter will have two parts, one part from Y/N's point of view and one part from Kenma's; the order will differ depending on the chapter.
Every update will be a double post so make sure you know you’re reading the correct one first, and reading both of them.
Time stamps don't really matter unless explicitly written by me so you can just ignore them :)
There will be both written and social media elements; written parts will be marked with a pen (🖊).
And I'm gonna be honest, while I love the anime I haven't actually watched it in a long time and I was never able to finish season three. That being said, if anything I write seems out of character for anyone just bear with me I'm trying my best lol.
Please feel free to give me any feedback and/or criticism to help me improve. And if any of the links aren't working just let me know and I'll try to get it fixed ASAP.
If you have any questions, don't feel too shy and reach out if possible; I promise I'll answer to the best of my ability.
(Also, just comment if you'd like to be on the taglist.)
Hope you enjoy the story :)
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nonclassyparty · 3 months
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tins without labels - prologue (j.wy)
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summary: Jung Wooyoung's life was always somehow intertwined with your own. from living in the same neighbourhood as kids to attending the same college; fights, bickering, bruises, teasing comments and tears. Wooyoung and you were never complete strangers but never friends either. Always somewhere in between, growing up with each other but never actually knowing one another. The relationship takes a confusing turn in your third year of college after an injury that places your football career on hold. Lonely, lost and confused, you find yourself at your first college party in the presence of none other than Jung Wooyoung asking him to show you what exactly have you been missing out on. playlist // my main masterlist // moodboard (tba) // click to donate to Palestine
pairing: jung wooyoung x reader warnings: none for this chapter i think! word count: 9.3k taglist: just reply or inbox me if u'd like to be added c: a/n: pls don't say damn when u see that i started another story. listen LISTEEEEEN. i know what u all will say..."bree should u rly be starting another series when u havent finished or started the 4757 bajillion ones that u already posted?" the answer is YES. let me explain myself briefly, this summer has been rly hard for me bc i lost someone who was incredibly important to me and i just can't write...i just can't! everything looks like shit!!! im halfway done with soot and something just isn't letting me continue. i can't write pretty on the outside or literally anything else i've started bc its all simply too sad. writing is draining to begin with despite how much i love and enjoy it but writing angst is k wording my mental health lol! so....i present to you this series, mostly dedicated to myself literally no one asked for this, i just feel like its something i need to write and always wanted to so here i go! it will be a little heartwarming series with lots of humor and coming of age shenanigans and huge chunks of it written from personal experience and i hope u guys read it and like it. i had a lot of fun writing this prologue. (p.s. i literally know jackshit about football/soccer so if by some chance someone that reads this knows their football shit....just let it go pls lmfaoo)
(prologue; when we were kids)
and I couldn't find the words, i couldn't think of what to say and all that I can do is stop and think about the days when all we used to dream about was meeting after school
6 and 8 years old;
Your mom helped you build the snowman.
An entire morning of running around your front yard, laughing and playing in the freshly fallen snow, seeing the air you breathe out in front of you that you pretended was cigarette smoke to make your mom laugh as the cold nipped at your cheeks.
The snowman was almost twice your size (which wasn't a lot, you were a fairly small child) with pebbles stuck in as his eyes and teeth pulled up in a big grin. Your mom found a small bucket in the old shed behind the house which she placed on his head as a makeshift hat and because you didn't have any carrots, there was a small twig stuck at the center of the snowman's face to serve as a long crooked nose.
(The snowman didn't have any arms, a detail that went over your head at the time.)
After admiring the big statue in the farther corner of your front yard for awhile, you finally retreated into the house with your socks wet along with the majority of your hot pink snowsuit. As you kicked off the damp clothes and exchanged them for warm, dry ones and fuzzy socks and then settled in front of the TV in the toasty living room with a mug of cocoa - you couldn't help but feel that it was a happy day.
Which is why when, in the late afternoon, once you looked out of your window to see what once used to be your snowman is now nothing but a big pile of disheveled snow with his plastic hat rolling around the sidewalk and two boys running away down the street with shrill laughter echoing after them, you simply couldn't help but burst into tears.
"Mommy!" You screamed out, running outside your front door in fuzzy socks and your sweater, as dramatic as you were. But you were six and your life still ended and began with coloring books and favorite toys, so a snowman that you made with your mom getting destroyed, surely felt like the end of the world.
Once your mom stepped out after you, about to scold you for walking outside into the cold air with no jacket on, you burst into crocodile tears as you pointed to the spot where your snowman once stood.
"Oh, no." She breathed out with a sigh before grabbing her jacket and slipping into whatever shoes were available by the door (they were your dad's old tennis shoes) and walking across the front yard to collect the small bucket from the sidewalk.
All you could do was stand and watch as you wailed so loudly after your snowman that the entire neighbourhood could hear.
"Honey, it's okay." Your mom tried to soothe you as she walked up the steps to your house, carrying what used to be the snowman's hat. "It's just a snowman, we'll make another one tomorrow!"
But you were inconsolable, bursting out in another wave of loud cries as you stomped your tiny foot and pointed to the house across the street.
"They ruined it! W-Wooyoung ruined it!" You sob, waving towards the boy's house with all the anger a six year old could possibly muster. You knew it was him, recognizing the ugly red jacket he wore this entire winter and his even uglier looking friend, Chanwook.
You weren't friends with Wooyoung. He was older than you and all of his friends were mean. You once tried to play with them when you first moved to the neighbourhood but they didn't want to play with a girl. You cried about that too.
They often teased you. Wooyoung said your crooked teeth made you look ugly!
She sighs again, "And that was very mean of him. But, Y/N, we'll just make another snowman tomorrow."
"But-" You start again, tears still sliding down your face. 
"We'll build him in the backyard where we have a fence, so no-one will be able to touch him." She offers with a smile, hoping you'll finally be consoled enough to walk inside and be safe from the harsh cold.
"But I won't be able to look at him from the window." You tell her quietly, voice going hoarse from the crying and bottom lip already wobbling as another wave of tears began to sunk in. She gives you a sympathetic smile.
"We'll get him a prettier hat and we'll use two long branches to give him arms!" Your mom offers again, trying to butter you up so the tears would stop. "We'll get a carrot for his nose and big pretty rocks for his eyes!" Once she realized it was working, she continued; "And we'll take a picture of you with him so you'll always get to look at him, even when he melts away!"
You peer up at her with a hiccup, finally bribed enough; "A picture?"
She nods, holding the door wider for you to finally walk inside as you inch towards the door, fuzzy socks now soaked, "A picture. We'll send your dad to the mall to develop them."
So, you finally walk inside the warm house again, changing your socks and immediately going to your father's home office to pester him about the camera and just how long will it take for a picture to be developed.
-
"-Y/N, we'll just make another snowman tomorrow!" 
Wooyoung heard your mom tell you as he peers at the exchange from across the street, through his bedroom window, freshly changed into dry clothes after a long hard day of playing outside with Chanwook and now, warming his frozen hands on the radiator.
When Wooyoung saw the snowman parked in the corner of your front yard, just a step away from the sidewalk, he and Chanwook thought it would be funny to ruin it. 
The thing was ugly and had an even uglier bucket at the top of it's head, perfect to kick around the street!
He didn't think too much about it, if he was honest. Just saw a big lump of snow he wanted to kick at until it collapsed, so that's what Wooyoung did. It was just a silly snowman.
Besides, you were already six years old. Far too old to be making a stupid snowman. You should've been going sledding with the rest of the neighborhood kids on the small hill just a couple of minutes away from your street. Wooyoung was mature now, so his mom allowed him to go without a chaperone this year. You were always so childish, no wonder your mom didn't let you go with them. You cried over everything.
But he didn't expect you to cry over the stupid snowman!
It was just a snowman. It would've melted anyway when the weather got warmer! Or gotten ruined by someone else! 
The brief fear of your mom telling Wooyoung's mom about what he'd done struck him. He'd positively get grounded for ruining your dumb snowman if she found out and then the rest of his winter break would be spent inside of the house.
You could always make another snowman. A better one. And since you're such a crybaby, Wooyoung would make sure to tell Chanwook that they won't be touching that one. Leave that ugly snowman alone.
Just so you wouldn't cry anymore.
-
10 and 12 years old;
"It's a shame your mother is dead, maybe if she was still around she would teach you how to act like a girl!" 
Your face flushed in anger as you stared the other boy, Beomseok, his chubby fingers still wrapped around your pencil case which was how the argument started in the first place.
He was in the same class as you and a typical bully. Bigger than the rest of his peers and always using it to his advantage to intimidate and tease them. Today, he took your pencil case and when you asked for him to give it back, he only gave you a gnarly smile and started running around the classroom and eventually out on the halls, screaming taunts at you. It would be a lie to say that you didn't scream some pretty mean stuff back but in your defense, he deserved it.
Now, you both stood as if you're ready to duel as the rest of your classmates and even some upperclassmen gathered to see what the commotion is all about, your fury rising so high that tears spring in your eyes at the mention of your mom as you observe his smug smirk. Obviously, from a very young age, you were bad at managing your anger.
"I hate you!" You scream out, voice high pitched. Then you jump on Beomseok with your full weight, successfully pulling him to the hard hallway floors as your hands curled into tiny fists that started colliding with his face.
And Beomseok, for all his intimidating build, talked an awfully big game just to end up bursting into tears as your fist collided with his nose. He was bad at fighting, you notice, if he could be beat up by a lanky girl almost two times smaller than him.
"I just-" Punch. "-wanted-" Punch. "-my pencil case-" A slap. "-back!"
"Somebody help!" He screams from under you, whining under each attack but his classmates were too busy cheering you on to come to his defense.
Once you start harshly pulling on his hair, two arms wrap themselves under your armpits and pull you off of your classmate. You're standing again and are turned by your shoulders to come face to face with your teacher, screaming at you.
"Is this a proper behavior in school?!" and lots of "Your father will hear about this!"'s and "You're going to the principle's office!" as she started pulling you by your arm down the corridor that was still filled with students.
"Everyone to your classrooms! Now!" Your teacher screams from the top of her lungs as she tugs on you and you follow after her with a frown on your face.
Stupid Beomseok.
-
Wooyoung's stomach hurts from laughing, clapping Chanwook's shoulder who was almost sitting on the floor due to his own fit of pure glee, as he watches Kim Beomseok roll around the floor in pain, clutching his nose. 
There's scratches and bruises already forming on his cheeks, little bit of blood mixed with a lot of big, fat tears. It's hard to feel even slightly bad for Beomseok, when Wooyoung heard how he torments his classmates along with the younger kids during recess. Did it count as bullying if the bully is the one getting bullied?
Maybe he finally got what was coming for him, nobody usually stood up to him and Wooyoung least expected you to be the one to put him in his place.
He deserved it, Wooyoung thinks, after what he said about your mom.
Wooyoung remembers her funeral three years ago, he remembers how much you cried and how you didn't leave your house for a month that summer. He even rung the doorbell to ask if you wanted to come out and play one time which he never did because you were a child and he was much more mature than you, you two had nothing in common. But he felt sad for you.
Your mom was nice, she always brought Wooyoung a chocolate when she'd come for a visit.
 Sadly, they discovered she had cancer when you were only seven and Wooyoung was nine. By the time they discovered it, it was already too far along and your mom passed away on a summer evening while you were outside playing hide and seek. 
Wooyoung remembers feeling so bad how they always made you the seeker that day because you were the youngest kid in the neighbourhood and far too easy to convince that it was simply always your turn to look for the other kids.
Your dad opened the door, smiling sadly at Wooyoung and saying that you weren't feeling well enough to come out and play. Wooyoung didn't try again after that.
The teacher is pulling you by your elbow through the crowd, yelling at the top of her lungs for everyone to head to their classrooms since class should start in a couple of minutes. You silently follow her, face twisted into an angry grimace.
Your hair has fallen out of your ponytail, long strands sticking to your face and Wooyoung is pretty sure that your shirt got ripped during the brawl. 
Wooyoung might've been laughing a bit too loudly because with angry eyes and cheeks flushed, your head whips towards him just as you pass by him.
Wooyoung opens his mouth with a smile, to say something like "Good job, Y/L!" maybe. He doesn't get the chance to.
"What are you laughing at, Jung?" You ask loudly and Wooyoung's laughter immediately dies down.
"Wha-?"
And it's then, that your foot meets Wooyoung's shin in a harsh kick that makes him yowl in pain and makes Chanwook burst into another wave of laughter as his hands grab at Wooyoung who doubles over in pain.
"Y/N!" The teacher screams out again, pulling you back by your shirt and going on another rant, filled with threats of calling your dad to school and something else he can't process at the moment.
Wooyoung is too busy feeling the pain and anger that fills him up as he rubs at the place your sneaker covered foot meet his leg.
"Y/N, you psycho!" He yells after you who is still getting dragged away. You don't even bother to look back at him.
(He still collects your pencil case from the floor and throws it on a desk that a classmate of yours says belongs to you before exiting the classroom and going to his own. Wooyoung tells himself it's for no other reason but just so your dad won't have to buy you a new one. He has enough on his plate already.)
-
14 and 16 years old;
Wooyoung has a girlfriend.
You don't know why that's something that bothers you so much.
Maybe because you don't understand what a girl could possibly see in Jung Wooyoung to willingly let him hold her hand or...God forbid, kiss her. Ew.
That's a lie, maybe even a bad attempt at coping on your part because there's a general consensus in your high school that Jung Wooyoung is good-looking. 
You didn't even think he was ugly when you were younger, when he was pulling on your pigtails and teasing you for playing with dolls. He was cute for an annoying kid back then too with his chubby cheeks and bowl haircut.
He was especially cute now, a recent discovery of yours which you have no one else to thank except puberty. It did wonders on your hormones and it did wonders on Jung Wooyoung too. 
His jawline got sharper the more baby fat he lost and lips grew fuller. His boyish smile was very attractive, even his smile lines were captivating. Wooyoung grew taller as well, not by much compared to the other boys in his grade but he was tall just enough so you'd have to look up to him when you argue but not enough to be intimidated by him.
So, yes, you supposed you'd understand the appeal if it weren't for his stupid mouth and mean words more often than not, directed at you. You threw shots back as well, sometimes even started an argument first if you were feeling particularly annoying but maybe that sums up why you're so bothered.
He started dating Chaeyoung at the beginning of this summer and since you have the fortune (read: misfortune) of living in the house right across the street from Wooyoung's, you were an unlucky witness to most of their dates.
And he was so sweet to her. He'd buy her cheap flowers and ice cream, they'd walk around the neighbourhood holding hands, they'd take Wooyoung's younger brother Kyungmin to the playground in the evenings. Wooyoung would smile a lot at her and Chaeyoung would always smile back.
You even saw them kiss. Just once.
When you were folding laundry in your bedroom, you looked through the window just in time to see their lips connect on Wooyoung's front porch. You quickly looked away, feeling shy and embarrassed, not understanding why you were blushing or feeling so sad all of a sudden.
Why was he so nice to other girls but never to you? You shouldn't think too much about it, the problem isn't you. Chaeyoung wasn't just some other girl but his girlfriend. Of course, he'd treat her special.
Whatever. You scoff as you watch Chaeyoung run to Wooyoung across the quad as you adjust your sports bag over your shoulder. 
She jumps into his arms and you can hear his loud, annoying laughter even to here as his arms wrap around her and he picks her up from the ground.
"What are you doing?" You almost jump out of your skin at the sound of Ryujin's voice as she nosily tries to follow where you were staring at.
Ryujin was the first friend you met since you started high school two weeks ago. She might be the only friend you have for awhile since you haven't really been trying to even get to know your classmates as you were too busy trying out for the girls football team.
You don't remember when you started actively playing football exactly. You always played it for fun with the boys from the neighbourhood (Wooyoung included)  but maybe it was around seventh grade when your dad pestered you into trying out a sport because he didn't know what else to do with you so he packed you up and sent you to a sports camp for two weeks one summer, that you started actually playing.
You went there only caring about your iPad and came back saying you'll be a professional football player.
Your dad doesn't want to say it but you know he thinks it's a fickle dream that will fizzle out with age.
Thankfully, Ryujin shared the same love for the sport as you so for now, you were relieved and content to spend time with her. She was nice.
You didn't need anyone else but maybe it would've been nice if someone who was older, who you were familiar with even if you always fought, would give you a couple of words of useful advice. Regarding the new teachers and subjects and all.
High school was scary.
"Nothing." You answer quickly, turning your back to Wooyoung and his girlfriend and fully facing your new friend.
"Nothing?" Ryujin gives you a suspicious smile, eyes darting over your shoulder once more before she ruffles your hair. You yelp. "Do you have a crush already, Y/N?"
You gently shove her away with a huff, fixing your bangs, "Don't be stupid. These boys are all ugly."
A crush. As if!
She laughs at that, throwing her arm around your shoulder as she directs you both to the field where practice was held, already yapping about her own crush.
-
"Hey, isn't that your neighbour?" Chaeyoung nudges Wooyoung with her elbow, nodding somewhere behind Wooyoung. He cranes his neck to follow the direction before his eyes land on you.
He snorts, "Yeah."
You were standing in the middle of the football field, sweaty and red in the face from all the running, with your hands on your hips as you paid attention to what your coach was yelling towards your teammates across the field.
The school's jersey seemed far too big on your lanky form and your hair was a mess, always slipping out of your ponytail. You were much smaller in build than the rest of the team and it looked funny to Wooyoung.
He didn't expect you to be into sports, let alone a sport like football. In fact, Wooyoung is surprised that you don't burst into tears when you start arguing with the makeshift referee played by another student. It's what usually happens if you spend longer than a minute arguing with Wooyoung.
And then he ends up being the bad guy for making you cry but no one ever mentions that you sometimes provoke him first as well but can't take it when it's dished right back.
Since you're such a crybaby.
He watches with an amused grin as you bare your teeth at the referee, who is really just a senior that thought it would be a fun time but now he has to stand arguing with you. And to Wooyoung's further amusement, the older boy who is almost two heads taller than you, looks like he's about to shit his pants in front of you.
Hm. Maybe not such a crybaby when it's anyone else but Wooyoung.
"I think she has a crush on you."
He turns to look at his girlfriend with a confused look, growing further confused when she smiles teasingly at him.
"Who?" He asks and she gives him a knowing look before nodding in your direction again. Wooyoung splutters out a surprised laugh, "Y/N?"
"Yeah." She nods excitedly, giggling, "She's cute."
Wooyoung scoffs with an eyeroll, "She's a kid."
A kid who might have a small crush on Wooyoung but still, a kid nonetheless.
He'd be stupid to say he didn't notice that you sometimes stare at him a little too much but what the hell is he supposed to do about that. You just started high school, you probably weren't even aware of what you were doing. It was a childish crush because at the end of the day that's what you are - childish.
Chaeyoung giggles again, the sound is soft and sweet, leaning her head against his shoulder. 
"It's kind of sweet." She sighs dreamily and Wooyoung snorts because nothing about you was sweet, "You're her handsome neighbour, the only guy who's always been close to her since she was a kid, she probably starts those childish arguments with you so you'd give her attention and then writes about you in her diary and-"
"Y/N is the last person to have a diary, first of all." Wooyoung interrupts with a snicker before looking down on his girlfriend who is teasing him, "Second of all, you sound ridiculous."
Chaeyoung lifts her head up from where it rested against him and looks at him seriously, her lips pressed together. Then she starts imitating Wooyoung's last sentence in a deeper voice that sounds nothing like him, "You sound ridiculous-ah!"
She squeals when Wooyoung pinches her at the waist lovingly and it turns to tickling her as he presses kisses to her cheeks.
As they continue to exchange kisses between hushed giggles, the conversation about you is forgotten.
-
18 and 20 years old;
From the moment you opened the door to greet your date, you knew that the whole night would be a complete and utter disaster.
Maybe you watched too many teen movies that romanticized prom night so much that even you ended up believing and looking forward to the glorified fantasy of it but boy, were you in for a rude awakening.
Your prom date was a boy from your Calculus class named Eunwoo. 
To be completely honest, you were convinced for the entirety of your senior year that you wouldn't have a date for prom at all because not much has changed since freshman year.
You still had one good friend (two, if you count Ryujin's friend that says she likes hanging out with you) and your focus was always on football. Add schoolwork and keeping up your good grades and you truly didn't have much time left for socializing.
So when Eunwoo pulled you aside after your football practice and asked you if you wanted to go to prom together with a handsome boyish smile on his face, your excitement for that night skyrocketed.
Eunwoo wasn't exactly a friend but he was nice to you during class, maybe you were wrong but his niceness sometimes even bordered flirting. Already, you were daydreaming about a possible boyfriend to spend your last summer with before you start college.
With a date or without one, you spend the bigger portion of your senior year saving up money for prom night or should you say prom preparations.
Makeup was never your strongest suit, in fact, it wasn't a suit of yours at all. You never wore it. You never did your hair either. 
Even on the rare occasion that you went to a high school party, you never wore anything else aside from jeans and T-Shirts. You were an athlete and you committed to the bit entirely, always being ready to sweat and opting for comfort of loose clothes above anything else.
But you wanted to look nice for prom, pretty. Not because of Eunwoo but for yourself. Prom is only once and you wanted to make sure you do it with confidence. 
All your saved up allowance went on the hair and makeup appointment along with your dress that Ryujin helped you pick out. The dress was quite simple in your opinion, a dark red one with a square neckline held up by two thin straps that clung to your curves and flared out at the bottom.
With your hair pinned up in an up-do with two curled strands framing your face and glitter on your eyelids, you thought you looked very pretty, beautiful even. Hell, it was probably the best you looked in your entire eighteen years of life. You could even put up with the painful heels for the sake of it.
Your dad made you pose over the whole house while you waited for your date to pick you up. First a photoshoot on the stairs, then one on the front porch, then a little in front of the living room fireplace. 
He seemed so excited with his camera hanging around his neck as he followed you around the house.
It was one of the moments you wished your mom was here for but nonetheless, it was much fun with your dad only as well. You were happy.
It all went to shit though once you opened the door for Eunwoo and he started laughing in your face.
"Oh my God!" He laughs, almost doubling over at the apparent hilarity of your appearance, "What are you wearing?!"
You laugh nervously, ignoring your father's glance at you from the sheer embarrassment, "What? Is it that bad?"
"No, no." Eunwoo shakes his head, wiping a stray tear that escaped while he was laughing, "It's just not like you, at all."
"Oh." You give him a sour smile, your fragilely built ego shattering completely. "I was just...trying something new I guess..."
He snickers with a headshake before offering you his hand, "Come on, let's go take a photo?"
After a small moment of hesitation, feeling your cheeks burn from the humiliation, you let him grab your hand and step out on the front porch. Eunwoo places a hand around your waist to pull you closer as you both smile at your dad's camera.
A couple of photos later, you both head towards Eunwoo's car as your dad waves you goodbye. You give him a small, almost sad wave back as Eunwoo opens the door for you. You ask him;
"Do I really look funny?"
"No, you look pretty no matter what." He answers, helping you with your dress. "It's just doesn't suit you I guess, it's not like you."
"Ah..." You say staring at the dashboard as you watch him round the car to get into the driver's seat. You glance back at your dad just to see him get back into your house and for a split second, you want to call the whole thing off and go back inside with him.
Of course this doesn't suit you. You were the girl guys dapped up in the hallways, the girl that was always covered in hoodies and sweatpants and never wore makeup. You must look stupid, all dolled up like this. What were you thinking.
Prom celebration is usually held at a hotel not far from your high school. The ballroom is enormous, with vast marble floors and high ceilings illuminated by golden, shimmery lights. It looks straight out a fairytale with colorful dresses worn by pretty princess and handsome princes in their extravagant suits. Only, you don't feel like a princess at all.
Eunwoo and you find your table and you briefly say hi to Ryujin and her date. Ryujin tells you how amazing you look and you give her the first (and possibly, only) genuine smile of the night.
"So," Eunwoo starts the conversation a few minutes after you settle down at your table with drinks, "Did you decide where you're going for college? Any scouts?"
"I'm leaning towards SNU. Their Women's Football Club is really strong and I feel like they actually get proper investments and budget." You tell him and he grins interrupting your next sentence.
"See, this is why I like you. It's hard to find a girl who knows about sports and is so chill about everything."
Your mouth stays parted, the rest of your sentence (which was really just saying that the fact the male football team was hot contributed to your decision as joke) went unsaid as his words registered. Every "compliment" Eunwoo gives you is starting to come off so backhandedly that you're beginning to realize that while he thinks he has you all figured out - he doesn't actually know you at all.
You give him a fake laugh and pray to God it doesn't sound fake enough for him to notice as you take a sip of your drink.
An hour later, your heels are killing you so much that you've completely given up on dancing. You observe Ryujin on the dance floor with her date, still going at it and sigh with the silent question of when it would be your turn. Instead, you're stuck to the sidelines with shoes that feel awful on your feet and a date that can't stop talking about how it's attractive that you're a "girl that actually eats". Eunwoo's compliments are becoming weirder by the second.
"Should I just take you home?" Eunwoo asks with an amused smile as he observes you taking off your heels for the tenth time since you sat back down.
"Ah, would you mind?" You give him an apologetic smile, feeling like a burden and a not-so-much-fun date, "I'm sorry, Eunwoo, this is unfair to you-"
"Nah, I had a fun time." He shakes his head, downing the rest of his drink, "Next time, just be yourself though, yeah?"
The weirdly phrased statement makes you pause. "What do you mean?"
"You know, you don't have to dress like this!" He laughs, playfully playing with the thin strap of your dress. You subtly move away from his touch. "It's not like you at all. I don't know if your friends talked you into it just to fit in but you shouldn't let them push you around like this."
He's so wrong that you can't speak for a moment but even if you could, you feel like trying to explain yourself to him would be far too exhausting and would lead to nowhere. Nor do you want it to lead anywhere anymore, if you were honest.
"Girls like that are so exhausting." He gives a tired sigh. "Outfits and makeup aren't the only thing in the world."
"Girls....like that?"
"You know! Like, the touchy-feely shit. Everything is about color-coordination and nail polishes with them. God forbid their hair is out of place. What a headache!" Eunwoo runs a hand through his hear before giving you an award winning smile. "That's why I'm glad I got to hang out with you! You're real."
"I'm....real?" You ask with a cocked head as your eyes start to narrow. He's too busy thinking that you like what he's saying so he continues.
"Yeah. You know, you keep it real. You're not caught up in that frivolous, girly bullshit. You're so chill, Y/N." He keeps smiling at you like he just gave you the highest form of compliment he possibly could.
But you can't bring yourself to crack a smile even if someone held a barrel of a gun to your temple at the moment. In fact, you feel like throwing up. You should've know from the start, from the moment he was so unreasonably impressed with your lack of makeup at the beginning of the year.
Eunwoo was one of those guys.
"Um," You slide your heels back on and grab your clutch, "You know what, you stay. I'll go."
"Wait, what." His brows raise in half confusion and half surprise as he watches you stand up from your seat.
"Yeah, I'll walk home."
"Wait, Y/N. Why would you walk home? I already said I'd drop you off-"
"No thanks. I don't want to get in a car with a sexist."
"What?!" Eunwoo reels back, "What the fuck are you talking about?! I'm not a sexist! I respect women!"
You huff, turning to him with a glare. "You respect women who are "cool" and "chill" and basically act like men. You should've just taken one of your dudes to prom if these are your opinions. I'm out."
So, that's how you find yourself in your pretty dress sitting in one of the plastic chairs of a convenience store with a popsicle in your mouth as you watch the cars drive by. You were too embarrassed to arrive home so early, you hyped up prom night so much to your dad - you'd rather lie and tell him you had a good time.
If the night couldn't possibly get any shittier, while you eat away at your cherry popsicle feeling undeniably sorry for yourself, you hear a familiar laugh followed by sounds of shoes scuffing against the pavement towards the convenience store.
Of course. Of fucking course, Jung Wooyoung would show up now, when you needed him least.
You try to make yourself seem as small as possible in the plastic chair, hoping he or his two friends wouldn't notice you (which in retrospect was a dumb hope, you were sitting right by the entrance in a fucking prom dress).
Ever since Wooyoung graduated high school two years ago, you only saw him in passing. He'd come home for Christmas holidays or a week or two during the summers and you'd only catch him skunk out of his house and into his dad's car if you were lucky. Unlucky, that is of course.
Maybe you were hoping he wouldn't even recognize you and although it would kind of hurt (as embarrassing as that is to admit), you feel like it would be a better option.
But since you were on a roll tonight, obviously this is just another thing that doesn't go your way.
"Nice dress, Y/L/N." You hear Wooyoung's voice speak, followed by snickers from his idiotic friends and his own attempt at stifling his laughter as they walk past you and into the convenience store, the small bell above the door signaling their entrance.
That ends up being your last straw. 
You don't cause another fight or yell something back after him, no, you don't have the energy to do that tonight. Instead, you feel like you will cry.
Tears are already burning at your eyes and your bottom lip wobbles, you're not even aware that your eyes follow Wooyoung through the display of the store, watching him as he picks up a pack of beer and heads for the cashier.
He got even more painfully handsome than he was when you'd see him every day before he graduated. His hair was double toned, the top of it black and the bottom strands bleached, brushing the nape of his neck.
You think you could even see a tattoo peaking under his shirt as he moves.
Jung Wooyoung was so not your type. Not that you really knew what your type was but all the guys that you found cute in your high school years were athletes, jocks who were organized and dedicated to their routine which in your opinion showcased their maturity, got good grades and were respected by their peers. Wooyoung was really the complete opposite of that so it was hard to explain why you so weirdly hung up over his approval.
He's still laughing about something with his friends, it would hurt so badly if it was about you, as his eyes dart through the display and connect with your own.
Wooyoung does a double take before his big smile slowly slips and dare you say, eyes soften as he looks at you and his lips part as if he wants to say something. 
It could all be in your head though and you're feeling even worse now that he caught you staring at him like a total creep, so you throw your popsicle in the trash and get up with a sigh, slipping back into your heels and deciding to just go home.
-
"Hey, Y/L/N! Wait up, I'll give you a ride home!" Wooyoung calls out after you, the plastic bag swinging back and forth in his hand. 
He can hear Chanwook's hushed objection which Wooyoung chooses to ignore, instead focused on walking closer to you. You couldn't make it far since you were basically limping in your heels.
"No thanks." Wooyoung hears your response and rolls his eyes. He hasn't spoken to you in the last two years at all but he can see that nothing has changed much - you were still too stubborn for your own good.
You didn't even bother to turn back and look at him, instead you hitch your dress further up and continue up the street and away from the convenience store.
"Y/N, come on. Quit being a brat and just wait for me to bring the car around."
"I said no!" You yell over your shoulder and let out a small yelp when you stutter a bit on your feet. To Wooyoung, you resembled Bambi right now.
"I'm trying to help you!" He yells back, still following you, "Just let me drive you back-"
"Wooyoung, seriously, fuck off!" You turn to face him with red cheeks and teary eyes (maybe that's why he's insisting so badly to drive you home, you simply look pathetic), "I don't need your fucking help!"
Wooyoung reels back at your tone and harsh words and then a wave of embarrassment washes over him when he hears Chanwook and Eunhyuk laugh behind him, at the fact that he just got told off by his little neighbour.
The embarrassment is followed up by anger that prickles at his skin like needles, he scoffs and if there's one thing Wooyoung will be - it's petty; "Fine! Limp home in your stupid heels then, see if I give a shit!"
You don't give him a response and Wooyoung doesn't bother to look for it either, instead turns around on his feet and heads towards his car (his dad's car). But not before telling a laughing Chanwook to shut the fuck up.
But once he's in the car with the keys in the ignition, he stares at the steering wheel in obvious contemplation before letting out a small groan, "Fuck."
Wooyoung turns to Chanwook, "Sit in the back, please."
His friend looks at him in surprise and confusion. "What?"
"Just sit in the back, will you? Please." Wooyoung repeats, avoiding Chanwook's eyes but feeling his stumped stare.
"Wooyoung, you cannot be serious." His friend laughs in disbelief as if reading his mind, looking around before giving Wooyoung another incredulous look, "She just told you to fuck off!"
Eunhyuk is quiet in the back which is a huge relief for Wooyoung, he really didn't need to defend himself to his other friend too.
"I can't let her go by foot in the dark, you've seen her! She can barely walk!" Wooyoung says defensively to both of his friends as Chanwook moves to the back with a huff.
"And that's your problem...how?" Chanwook, like the annoying pest he is, asks.
"It's not...." Wooyoung trails off, trying to look for an excuse as to why he was going out of his way to give you a ride home. "But...but her dad would kill me if he knew I saw her and didn't drive her back. It's only right."
Chanwook smacks his lips obnoxiously loud, "Sure."
Wooyoung doesn't even need to turn around to know that his friend is giving him a very bold side eye right now.
Eunhyuk snorts but doesn't say anything else. Wooyoung is thankful for that at least.
"She probably won't even want to get in the car." Chanwook comments quietly as they reach you on the sidewalk. He ends up being ignored.
Wooyoung rolls the window of the old car down so he can talk to you, he has to say you're walking at an impressively slow pace. "Y/N, get in the car."
He hears you groan dramatically from the outside, "Jung, you're not my dad. Stop telling me what to do."
Wooyoung ignores Chanwook and Eunhyuk's snickers in the back once again, he grows even more irritated, "I'll call your fucking dad right now and tell him you're walking home alone this late. How about that?"
You turn to him with your glossy lips twisted into a scowl, "You wouldn't."
Always ready to prove a point or in this case, lie straight out of his ass, Wooyoung makes a show of stopping his car next to the sidewalk and fishing his phone from the pocket of his jacket before opening up his contacts and beginning to scroll. He doesn't even have your dad's number.
But Wooyoung is a professional bullshitter so he keeps pressing random buttons with a straight face and presses the phone to his ear before turning to you with his brows raised-
"Okay, fine!" You exclaim with an angry huff and start rounding his car as your cheeks flush a pretty pink color. Wait, pretty-? You open the door and angrily plop into the passenger's seat with a glare directed towards him, "Fucking snitch."
Wooyoung ignores you, locking his phone without another word and beginning to drive away.
There's an awkward silence in the car, only sounds being made are those of the plastic bags filled with beer that keep rustling in Eunhyuk's lap.
"This isn't the way to our street." You say and Wooyoung might be crazy but you almost sound a little nervous at that. He glances at you before it dawns onto him. Of course, you'd be feeling nervous.
It's nighttime and you're in a car with three dudes older than you who you don't know that well. Wooyoung didn't even bother telling you about his plan before he started driving. A curse runs through his head before he clears his throat,
"I'll just drop these two off at a party nearby and then drive you home." He murmurs, chest constricting a little when he sees you cross your hands over your chest, a gesture which makes you seem smaller.
"Wait, wha-" Chanwook, gosh he was really pissing Wooyoung off tonight, starts from the backseat. "Woo, I thought you were going too-"
"I will." Wooyoung interrupts him with a clenched jaw as he pulls up to the house where the party is held, "I'll drop Y/N off and then come back, it won't take more than fifteen minutes. Now get out- Wait, give me that bag right there."
Eunhyuk hands him one of the plastic bags and Wooyoung fishes through it and pulls out two blueberry ice creams out of it before giving the bag back to Eunhyuk. Which he bought for himself, of course. Not because he saw your popsicle melting on the pavement or anything.
Chanwook watches with a dropped jaw before huffing, Wooyoung hears him murmur, "Doing it for her dad, my ass-" 
"I'll be right back!" Wooyoung announces loudly, far too loudly, and Eunhyuk slams the car door shut so Wooyoung can drive away.
When he pulls away, the silence in the car is almost stifling so Wooyoung offers you the ice cream, "Here."
You look at him like a second head just popped out of his shoulder before looking back through the window and ignoring him completely. Wooyoung lets out a small groan. So stubborn.
"Oh my God, just take it." He says, placing the ice cream on your lap as he continues to drive. He bites back a smile when he sees you stare at the ice cream on your lap for a long second before grasping it and opening the wrapper so you can eat it.
Wooyoung really doesn't know what he's doing right now.
He doesn't know why he bought ice creams for you, he doesn't know why he insisted on getting rid of his friends first before dropping you off home, he has no idea why he keeps glancing at you every couple of seconds from the corner of his eye and he especially doesn't have a clue why he takes the longer route home.
When tomorrow comes and he wakes up hangover from the party and probably in someone else's bed, he'll give himself the same excuse he gave the boys. He wanted to make sure you got home safely because it's the right thing to do. There was nothing else to it.
But in this moment, right now, in the stifling silence and the breeze that flows through the opened window's because the air conditioning isn't working - Wooyoung notices things that he feels embarrassed to notice, or maybe he noticed them before but never allowed himself to appreciate them until tonight.
Like, how nice your bare neck and collarbones look now that your hair is pinned up in soft curls. A thin silver necklace graces your neck. Or how the two curled strands at the front frame your face prettily. Your eyelids are painted with something shimmery which Wooyoung doesn't know the name of and your cheekbones are a soft peach color intentionally placed there beforehand. 
Your glossy lips wrap around the ice cream cone and you bite off a huge chunk. 
"Why are you staring at me?" Wooyoung can decipher the question even through the mouthful of ice cream as you give him a slight glare.
Because you're pretty. Is what he wants to say, honest and bare, but he obviously can't because you're you and he's Wooyoung. "Because you have ice cream on your nose."
His hands tighten against the steering wheel when he sees you quickly look to the side and wipe at your nose self-consciously. You blush a scarlet red from the embarrassment. Great, now he feels like an asshole.
Wooyoung clears his throat, "Why did you look so sad? Back there, in front of the store."
He has no idea why he's trying to make conversation with you. You two never do that, never did. The closest thing to a conversation between Wooyoung and you would be the arguments you'd have in the middle of the school hallway when he'd tease you for your braces.
Those came off as well, by the way, he can see the pearly white teeth perfectly aligned now as you speak. No longer crooked. Maybe he'd like to see them pulled up in a smile but that's borderline wishful thinking now. You smiling at Wooyoung? Yeah, right.
"No reason." You tell him quietly, slumping in your seat as you continue to eat your ice cream. You sigh with an eyeroll, "Just...prom sucked."
Likely thing to happen.
The key is to go to prom with your expectations so low that you can only go up from there but Wooyoung had an inkling feeling that having low expectations wasn't in your nature.
Besides, you were a jock. He remembers even when you were a freshman, you were already running with the popular crowd without even being aware of it, with the athletes and the cheerleaders. Prom night is sort of a pinnacle of the high school experience for people like you.
Guess it's a bummer that you look like you had a shit time.
He hums, "At the end of the day, it's just another Friday night. Nothing special. So even if it sucked, you'll get over it."
Maybe he wasn't the best at giving advice or comforting people.
You side eye him and he pretends not to see it before you quietly add, "I don't usually spend a year worth of allowance on just another Friday night."
Wooyoung cracks a smile, teasing you being a second nature even if you barely spoke since he graduated, "What? Did you expect a prince charming to sweep you off your feet so you two can dance the night away or something? I didn't know you were into that corny shit, Y/L/N."
He hears you scoff, cheeks still red as you roll your eyes, seriously annoyed, "Whatever. Forget I said anything."
Wooyoung's gives a forced snicker just to annoy you before his smile drops again and his eyes flutter shut for a moment out of pure frustration at his own stupidity, internally cursing himself. If shooting yourself in the foot was a person - it would have Jung Wooyoung's photo and name posted under it.
Why can't you just be nice to her?
The air in the car turns even more awkward and Wooyoung shifts uncomfortably in his seat while you continue to eat your ice cream in silence as you stare through the window.
He slows down in front of your house just when you're finishing your ice cream.
You crumple the wrapper in your hand, place the second ice cream on the dashboard and grab the small bag laying on your lap before grabbing the door handle.
"I hope," Wooyoung starts and when you turn to look at him, he's overcome with a sudden coughing fit which is really just awkwardness and the need to fix whatever the fuck he broke a little even more tonight, "Uh, hope you took some good pictures tonight at least because..."
He trails off, feeling like it was his first time flirting with a girl. Wait, what the fuck. He was not flirting with you. Not even a little bit. Wooyoung was simply trying to pay you a compliment. Simple as that. It doesn't have to be anything more. You don't even need to be friends to pay someone a compliment, in fact, Wooyoung is positive that regular archnemeses complimented each other at least once.
Unfortunately, compliments aren't the norm between the two of you, so whatever nice thing he says feels wrong.
Your brows raise.
"You know," He trails off, scratching the back of his neck in an attempt to seem cool and collected. He nonchalantly adds but his side glances might give him away, fortunately you're too much of a ditz to notice, "You look good."
You stare at him for a long moment, seriously it's so long that he almost changes his mind and adds an insult just so you two would be back in those familiar waters of bickering and teasing each other but then your eyebrows fall back down and a scowl overtakes your features.
"Yeah, right." You mumble and Wooyoung almost feels insulted for some reason but then you continue, "Thanks for the ride."
And then you're out of the car and already moving across your front lawn before Wooyoung can snap out of it and remember to turn the car back on.
-
19 and 21 years old;
"10 more minutes! Y/L/N stop arguing with that asshole and get back into your position before you're out of the game completely!" 
Your coach is red in the face from all the shouting and you know what's good for you, so you keep your mouth shut as you run to your spot, thoroughly ignoring the glare your team's captain shoots at you from your right.
The 'asshole' that your coach is referring to is the referee who didn't count a player from the rival team almost breaking your leg by bulldozing into you - as a foul.
"-stole Eunha's position from her and can't even play properly." You hear a snicker behind you and don't even have to turn to know who it's directed at.
Despite it being only your first semester, you haven't made the greatest impression on your teammates (nor did you try all that much to change that impression). 
So for the time being, when there was no rival team, you were the collective enemy in the changing rooms and on the practice field. A freshman who kicked their friend from the spot she had since she started college. A freshman who thought she was better than the rest of her team. A freshman who didn't know how to behave at times. A freshman that made them run extra laps because she was bad at remembering all the new rules at times.
And now, a freshman that was playing badly and fucking up things for the rest of them.
"Y/N!" A hiss from your right is heard and your eyes zero in on your captain, Jihyo, who is staring at you. "Focus."
You swallow harshly and give her a quick now before focusing your gaze to the front.
In high school, you weren't used to losing. You were a winner, it's what you prided yourself in. Failure wasn't an option when it came to football.
But turns out in college, when all the other players are as good as you, winning isn't as easy.
In fact it’s a lot harder than you thought it would be. Nearing the end of the first half the score sheet is still empty and it annoys all of the players and the fans as well. The weirdest thing is how ball is not even on your team's side of the field most of the time; your defenders did not have a very entertaining start of the game in comparison to defenders from Busan, who already look out of breath from all of the attacks to their side. Not to mention that they keep teaming up on you specifically.
You can’t pinpoint what exactly is wrong and why there was no goal to this point; half of you thinks it’s because you didn’t blend well with the team. 
"Run, run, run!" Yeonjin shouts, when Sinb loses the ball and Busan’s midfielders rush to their side.
The spike of adrenaline energizes you and your eyes zero on the ball, running after it. Mina’s figure passes from your left and both of you corner the midfielder, successfully getting the ball to your side. You have it and quickly pass it to Yeonjin, seeing her signal for the ball. You watch her run off when a body collides with your own and the impact is so strong, you lose your balance, falling down.
‘What?’ You ask yourself in disbelief not understanding how you're sprawled across the grass again, slowly standing up. At first you're shell-shocked but now anger fills you to the brim when you see that it's the same girl who intentionally collided with you the first time, watching you with a smug smirk and then you're just  ready to fight.
 You push back at her and get even angrier when the bitch doesn't fall. 
"Are you going to go tattle to mommy?" She asks with a mocking concern and you can’t hear anything; you even forget that you are in the middle of the game because your anger turns your vision red. 
With a loud groan, you launch towards her and grab her by the shirt, screaming to her face that 'she's a cunt'. There are hands around you, pulling you away, trapping you and not letting you go even when you try to break free.
Jihyo's face is in front of you and you can't register what she's saying but you can see her turn red from how pissed off she is. Maybe it's better if you're not listening to her, if you can't hear anyone actually...but then-
"Hey, number nine! You better not fucking cry!"
At first, you think the loud yell came from somewhere on the field. You thought another player from the Busan team was talking shit. And then,
"Number nine! Crybaby!"
There's some laughter in the audience and it's then that you realize the voice is shouting from the fucking bleachers.
A teammate is already pulling you in the opposite direction but your eyes are glued to crowd sitting on the sidelines, the annoying voice insistently yelling. Crybaby. Crybaby. Crybaby.
The worst part is that the voice sounds so painfully familiar, you just can't put your finger on it. Who.
You're about to let it go. You're about to be the bigger person and not act like a total brute on the field, just let it go Y/N. But then-
"Hey, hey crybaby!" You stop in your tracks, head whipping to the direction the voice was coming from and eyes coasting over the bleachers. "What kind of hill did you roll down from that you don't even know how to push someone back properly?!"
Finally, you spot it. Him. In a red hoodie, making sure to stand out in the sea of blue. It's no wonder the voice sounded so eerily familiar, you've heard it screaming at you for the majority of your childhood and a good chunk of your teen years. 
Because he rolled down the same hill as you with only a street separating you.
When he realizes that you've caught onto him, he gives you that smile. That grin that never led to anything good, pearly white teeth gleaming under the lights of the bleachers as he taunts you.
You blood pressure jumps so, you take a deep breath and....scream;
"Jung Wooyoung!"
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January Creator of the Month: Jerzwriter
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Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is CFWC's own @jerzwriter.  The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.
Quick Links:
Tumblr Blog Complete Masterlist
How do you want to be known on Tumblr? 
Elsa
More below...
1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 
It was sometime in 2017, and the first book I ever played was The Royal Romance, Book 1.
2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?
I joined a couple Facebook groups in 2019. I just wanted to discuss stories with others who were interested, as no one in my real life reads Choices. I didn't even know I was entering a fandom. lol I started reading fanfic on Tumblr the following year, but I found Tumblr intimidating, so I was mostly a silent reader. I didn’t start writing and contributing until May 2021, mostly because Open Heart was ending and I was in denial. 🙂
3- How did you pick your blog name? 
It’s pretty boring, actually. I’m from NJ, and I write. I wanted it to be JerZwriter, so people would know it is Jer-ZEE-Writer, but that wasn’t doable, so it’s Jerzwriter, and most think it is Jerz-Writer. Oh, well!  
4- Pull up the first and last posts in your archive, and tell us about them!  
My first post was the first chapter of my Ethan x Casey x Tobias love triangle, Delaying the Inevitable (OH).  It was my very first fanfic and I really didn't think I'd write anything beyond that.  I was so green back then, not only to fanfic but to the fandom as well. I’m really glad that I was naive because I don’t think I would have had the courage to post it if I had, but I’m glad that I did. 
My last post was Falling for You, a little drabble I wrote for Tobias x Casey (OH), and it featured a commission by the talented artist @weetlebeetle. It was a light, fun piece that took place early in Tobias and Casey's relationship, and it shows Tobias at his absolute simpiest. Lol 
5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both? 
Oh, how I wish I could draw, but I can't.  So, I’m strictly a writer. I may try giving drawing a go again, but I don't expect much to come of it. lol
6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?
Choices was the first fandom I ever wrote for, and I started in May of 2021.  So, just over two and a half years. I have written a little bit for some other fandoms since that time, but I primarily write for Choices.
7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?
Tough question.  I write for Open Heart, Crimes of Passion, and Wake the Dead, and they are three of my favorite stories. I also loved Desire & Decorum, but I never wrote for it.  Though, I’m planning a re-read, and you never know. 🙂
8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?
It was the first chapter of Delaying the Inevitable. I was so green when I started that series that I’m sure there are things I would change, but I’m still very proud of it.  That series will always have a special place in my heart.  I’d like to revisit it one day to “clean it up”, it could use some condensing. But I would never change the storyline.
9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created? 
This is such an unfair question. lol The Delaying the Inevitable Series definitely comes to mind, but I’m also very proud of my Eli Sipes prequel stories, A Mother’s Journal, Coming Up Blank, and The End of the World. But Tobias and Casey are my favorite pairing, and I simply love the world I created for them. And while my headcanon for them is my favorite, I cannot pick just one fic for them, and I'm not going to! lol But, I've also written a bunch of AUs for them, and Friends* is one of my favorites.
10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?
Yes, to both! The fandom is much smaller today, but back when we were more active, I learned you couldn't predict how a fic would be received.  There are too many to name, but I will say whenever my smut does well (and quite a few of them have), I’m always astounded. lol 
11-  If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? 
This is such a difficult question because I believe the best stories incorporate a little of each, and, as a writer, exploring all three helps spur creativity. Also, my absolute favorite is angst with a happy ending, so there is definitely some fluff in there (and I'm never mad at a little smut being thrown in!) But if I were forced to choose, it would probably be angst.  I think that's where I am strongest, and I just love raw emotion. I think that’s where character development really occurs. I have not written as much angst recently, and I miss it.  Perhaps I need a change in 2024. 
12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?
There are definitely parts of me in my MCs and OCs, but I do my best to prevent them from becoming self-inserts.  I'm not as cool as any of them, that's for sure! lol That said, I do find inspiration for my fics in real life, so there is bound to be a little crossover. When using real-life inspiration, I try to change details so that the fiction is not a carbon copy of the real-life event. Normally, by the time I'm done, they're hardly recognizable.
13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most? Where do you feel you are strongest?
I struggle most with setting a scene. Dialogue is my strong suit, and that just flows for me. It flows so much that sometimes I forget to describe what's going on around the conversation. I think this is particularly easy to do in fanfiction because so much of the "world" has already been provided for us, so I recognize this more when I'm writing original works.
The other thing I struggle with? Brevity. I know I can go on, and on, and on. lol I've gotten much better at this, but there is still room for improvement.
14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?
(Elsa leaves the room, quietly crawls under her desk, and hides…) YES!!! Far, far too many, and no matter how much I share those posts that say, "You don't have to finish! If you're not feeling it, move on!" I don't believe it! lol I really want to make wrapping them up a priority in 2024.  But I also know writing - particularly good writing - cannot be forced.  So, it's a goal, but I'll only do it if I feel it’s right. 
15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first? 
It would depend on who asked.  I’m not ashamed of writing fanfic at all, but if I believed the person would be judgemental, I wouldn't be willing to share.  A few of my friends have read select pieces of my fanfic, and I’ve always received positive feedback from them. I wouldn’t be opposed to sharing more.  What I'd share would depend greatly on the person asking.
16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?
There are many published writers that I admire, but I don’t think they've influenced my writing here. Within the fandom, there are many writers who have inspired me in different ways. There is no way I can ever name them all. But I'd like to give a shout-out to some.
@jamespotterthefirst and @bex-la-get were among the first writers I read when I joined Tumblr. I found their passion for both canon and the worlds they created inspiring, especially as Open Heart was nearing its end and all of us addicts needed our fill. Reading their works helped keep the story alive for me and so many others, and it inspired me to try my hand at it as well. To my shock, they were both so encouraging and supportive of me when I arrived, and I'm forever grateful. Back then, I thought they were rockstars - and they are! But now, they're also friends. I wasn't familiar with @alwaysmychoices from the start, but when I came across their work, I was just blown away.  Weekend with Dr. Ramsey will live rent-free in my head forever, and that headcanon about Charlie calling Ethan the night before she marries someone else. (I faint.) Ohhh, the delicious angst! The way she made me feel what Charlie felt was just mind-boggling, and it encouraged me to really dig into my character's emotions and bring them to life in a more meaningful way.
Early on, I read @utterlyinevitable, and the thing that impressed me the most was how Dom was willing to "write stories that “went "go there.”  They tackled issues that others wouldn't touch.  In their world, everything wasn’t perfect, including the characters themselves. I admired that vision and, frankly, bravery, and it definitely encouraged me to write what I wanted to and not what I felt was expected of me.
More recently, @mydemonsdrivealimo inspired me to explore parts of my MCs that I have not delved into in the past.  In particular, Casey's bisexuality. It can be challenging to represent a bisexual character when they are in a straight-presenting relationship, and you risk alienating readers no matter what you do (looking at all readers here.) So it becomes easier to be lazy and ignore it. But that's a disservice to the character as much as it's a disservice to people living similar situations in real life... like I have many times. Through MJ's writing and our conversations, they've helped me become more aware and do a better job in this regard, and I'm not even sure if they know this - it may totally be news to them lol - but I'm eternally grateful. Now, I feel my girl Casey is free, and OMG, how I love our characters playing together in HC now!
Then there are @lilyoffandoms and @storyofmychoices, who bring joy to all that they touch. Who knew when Lily created a little drabble putting our characters in a new world together, it would end up being one of the brightest fandom spots of 2023? Who knew that so much more would stem from that one work? Seriously, it's been one of the highlights of my fandom experience this year, and it's helped me to find inspiration at times when I felt like it was lost. Thank you both - I am so lucky to have you both here!
There are so many more I could mention, but I'd still forget people and feel horrible, so I want to take the chance to thank every writer in the fandom for sharing their gifts with us. Each of you is an inspiration in your own way; each of you can give someone an idea, and you have no idea where that spark will lead. So, never stop sharing!
17-  Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series? 
Delaying the Inevitable, Friends*, All in the Past, and the WIP What’s Forever For. I also think some of my Ethan x Tobias works would have made for a good sitcom, and how I wish my Tobias x Casey friendship with Bryce x Jensen would be an epic sitcom. The world needs it! lol   (Jensen belongs to @mydemonsdrivealimo.)
19- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art? 
I do. Mostly shorter stories that will never see the light of day, but also some more substantive works... which will also never see the light of day! lol I wrote a novel-length political thriller some time ago. It would need a ton of work to bring it up to 2024, as the political landscape has changed so much. I also have two original WIPs I've been writing. One is an angsty story about a friendship that's loosely based on a childhood friend I lost to cancer a few years ago.  The other is a polyamorous romance about two best friends who fall for the same person. It's really a beautiful, emotional story. If I like the end result, maybe I'll let it see the light of day... maybe. lol
20-  What other hobbies do you have?
I enjoy theater, and I'm lucky enough to live in the best part of the world to partake in that.  I go to a lot of Broadway, Off-Broadway, and local theater productions. I also love going to concerts - they’re like group therapy! Trust me, I got more out of seeing Noah Kahan and Hozier in 2023 than I did from the entirety of sessions with my therapist - and I loved my therapist. lol
Prior to 2020, I did a fair amount of traveling, and I hope to start doing a little more this year.  But I have to admit, since the lockdown, I’ve become more of a homebody, and I like it, so we’ll see how that goes! 
I used to be very involved with activism and advocacy for women’s, lgbtq+, and mental health issues. I still am, but in a different capacity than I was in the past. These issues require people fighting for them, and doing so has always been a huge part of who I am, but it can be draining, and burnout is real. I really reached the end of my rope. So, nowadays, I work as a volunteer for a couple local organizations that really mean a lot to me. I'm not involved in grassroots efforts or taking trips to talk to legislators as often, but I'm helping people on a smaller scale, and that still goes a long, long way.
22: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).
As most of you know, I’m one of the mods here at CFWC, so it was a little weird when my the wheel landed on my name.  But, honestly, it’s happened before, and I've just spun again, even though I am eligible. But this time around, I decided to do it. This fandom really means a lot to me, and I wanted to share a little more about myself and my crazy pixelated people.
I'm truly grateful to everyone in the fandom who does their part to make this a place that many, like me, still see as a place they want to be. We're smaller, it's imperfect, it has plenty of problems, but I am choosing to focus on the good... because there is much more of that than there is bad. So, thank you to each of you... and I hope we all have a wonderful 2024! xo
PS... My header... I know Tobias wasn't technically an LI... which was truly criminal. So, that's what fandom is for, fixing what canon effed up. lol My favorite canon LI is Trystan Thorne (COP). I tried adding their picture to the header alongside Tobias, but it looked terrible, so here I am. :)
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I can't wait to highlight more of you in 2024! :)
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snarky-magpie · 17 days
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20 Qᴜᴇꜱᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰɪᴄ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ
Thanks for the tag, @fiendishfyre! 1. How many works do you have on A03? 16 published, 9 hidden.
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 673,850. I don't have a problem. No sir.
3. What fandoms do you write for? Harry Potter atm, original, and Voltron (formerly, lol).
4. What are your top five fics by kudos? 1. PS. I Hate You. 2. Many Happy Halloweens 3. Catching Crows 4. Call Me By My Name 5. Stealing The Seeker (my first HP fic, yay)
5. Do you respond to comments? Yes, to every single one unless they're rude (they usually aren't). I spend way too much time online and love to talk about my stories.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? None, really. I mostly write HEA. I am planning an MCD fic, but I don't know if I'll find the strength to actually write it.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Definitely PS. I Hate You. The epilogue will give you diabetes.
8. Do you get hate on fics? No, I'm not famous enough for hate. Most people in the fandom have been lovely. I've only got hate from prongsfoot shippers for saying there's a way to enjoy both jegulus and prongsfoot without hating on the other (ironically). Soured me on the whole ship pretty fast, though.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, but mostly for Voltron. I only have one smutty HP fic. I do love writing it, though, and I've got an explicit jegulus story in the works.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Tried Voltron x Wednesday, and it was a really cool experience, but I gave up due to a lack of readership.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Tried to, with one of my betas. Got as far as two chapters.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Jegulus jegulus jegulus jegulus jegulus (I'm normal about them)
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Of Bluebells and Deception. Don't look for it, it's one of the hidden ones.
16. What are your writing strengths? Insert the meme 'you people have strengths?' Dunno. Based on what people say, I'm funny? Yeah, it comes as a shock to me too.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Timeline consistency. Please, if you love me, never check if the dates, years, and ages of the characters align. Also, descriptions, and I tend to overdo it with internal monologues.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I write everything in another language since my first language is Czech. It's tough and gives me permanent impostor syndrome.
19. First fandom you wrote for? Voltron: Legendary Defender
20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Ironically, my least popular one (by a long shot). Moorland Skies. Tagging: @courfee @thebibutterflyao3 @howmanyfrecklesdoyousee @starlightvld (No pressure, of course!) And whoever else wants to play.
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crimetimesteadicam · 3 months
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ok @morporkian-cryptid tagged me to do this fic author interview so here we go...
if you would like to do this, i am officially tagging you, yes you, right now. tag me back so i can see your answers
1 How many works do you have on AO3?
i got 40
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
1,044,749
3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
sorry like none of these are lupin iii. a blight on my lupin iii blog
Wabisabi (991 kudos) - Spirited Away. idk it's short and cute, read it
BONES OF BLACK MARROW (952 kudos) - Homestuck. the infamous cyoa cannibalism sex fic. scrolling through the things people say about it in the bookmarks is always so funny
Cum mortuis in lingua mortua (925 kudos) - Homestuck. no clue why it has so many kudos lol it was like the first long thing i've ever wrote (a whole decade ago??? jesus). it's a d&d/discworld joke
Vanitas vanitatum (914 kudos) - Homestuck. the same d&d/discworld joke except the LI is turbo depressed. notable for being the only fic i ever outlined and edited and that's why it whips
Supermassive Retinol Overdose! (677 kudos) - hey look, a lupin fic made it on here!
4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i do when i have something meaningful to say besides "thank you!" i don't have a lot of thoughts about my own work so therefore i tend to not respond if there's not a direct question :( my head is empty. i always respond to every single comment on the last chapter of longfics though because i'm always impressed people read that far lol. genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for reading all that
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
idk uhhhh i wrote a series once where two of the main couples break up at the end, but it wasn't really angsty
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
they all end pretty happily
7. Do you write crossovers?
if i did it was so long ago i don't remember it
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
no but people used to send passive aggressive hate about my art in fics once in a while. hasn't happened in like 2+ years
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
yes. every kind. EVERY KIND
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
a bot will sometimes scrape my high kudos homestuck fics and plant them on a junk ebook site
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yeah i think like 7 of them got translated into russian and do numbers on ficbook.net
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
in the past me and my friend would sit around a laptop and scream laugh write our way through crack fics
13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
right now it's jiglup and fujilup
14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
i finish almost all my WIPs because i'm a freak. if i don't finish a WIP it's because some dramatic life event happened. this has only occurred two times
15. What are your writing strengths?
im a funny binch
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
i don't outline or edit or re-read any of my fanfic. i just type it and then eyeball it for typos and then post it. i COULD outline and such to really make the narrative nice and tight, but i don't find it very fun to do (for fanfic) and this is like, my relaxing wind down hobby. i just wanna have fun haha. the only reason my fics like, make sense, is because i write at least one ending scene first thing and always aim for that, and also i write out of order so i kinda know the route of the story
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
it's fine if it makes sense to do it there as a narrative device
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
h-hetalia crack fic.....
19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
once i figure out how to draw zenigata it's over for you bitches. luzeni hours on da clock
20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
for lupin iii fic, i like Lightkeepers the best
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a-x-s-c-e · 7 days
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Long time no see :')
I just remembered this account exists and finally logged on for first time in a decade. And possibly to the surprise of no one, I still write fanfiction and it's still SasuHina. Go figure.
Some general updates:
"Differently" - AU, Divorce, Rated M, Cross-Posted on FF and AO3 is updated pretty frequently, maybe too frequently, but I've become kind of obsessed with where it's headed. I just updated today! It's posted on AO3 first but I'm about to upload the newest chapter (9) on FF. Maybe it's because I use AO3 a little more, but the review traction is a lot slower on this. If you happen to like this story or give it a go, feel free to review. :')
"Inevitable Reality" - AU, Rated M, only on FF was last updated September 2023, a whole 8 years later from previous chapter. Don't jump me. :( I'm planning on finishing this story this year, or early next. I re-read it recently (and cringed at my old writing) but somehow didn't hate it as much as I thought I would. I forgot how much I love weirdo Hinata and anxious Sasuke, they're too cute to give up on. I was searching the title of this and found it surprisingly on a few recommendation lists. Thanks to those that read it/still message me about it! I promise to work on it this year. I would offer to re-write and fix, but I am not as motivated to do that. We'll see.
SasuHina Month 2024 - I am considering doing it...we'll see! I want to work on writing in universe - I've been so stuck on AUs because I'm always hesistant to write something incorrect with the series. I'm actually re-reading Naruto (and in deep, nostalgic pain from it) and plan to give Boruto another chance. So, if I participate, I'm hoping to write it entirely in universe as a challenge. Stay tuned!
Finally (and just as a bonus wtf comment)
"You're Welcome" - that one's from 2011 (I was a child when I wrote this) and I will never read it again. I cringe at the thought LOL. I want to delete it but I love reviews and sometimes I read them (even if they're old) for a confidence boost. Idk why some of you read it within the last four years, I know it's not well written and that's just me assuming who I was back then - out of all my other stories, this is simply one I physically cannot re-read without my face scrunching up. Anyway TL;DR I won't delete but I wish I had the guts to. Read my other fics instead LOL
In an effort to avoid spamming the SasuHina Discord, I'll just post chapter updates here. I don't know if I'll post as read-mores whatever linked there, and I haven't really been active on tumblr in forever either, so we'll see. I'll likely prepare a fanfic recommendations post soon but don't be surprised if non-SasuHina fics make the cut - I've expanded the net when I run out of things to read heh.
Thanks for reading!
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lumosatnight · 4 months
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Year in Review 2023
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I did this for 2022 and I couldn't pass up the opportunity for more stats. Thanks @oknowkiss (x) for the tag! Here is my year in review: 2023 edition 🥳
Stats
Word Count: 339,585 (86,974 new)
Hits: 136,378 (68,393 new)
Number of Fics started and finished: 12 over 1k and 49 under 1k
Number of WIPs started: idk... like 10? 20?
Ships I wrote this year (not including background ships): Lots and lots and lots but mostly Drarry (8), Snarry (2), Drarius (2), Fleurmione (2), Lunansy (2), and Cissamione (2)
Favorite ship(s): This year maybe Narlily, Snarry, Luther, Mollytrix
Least favorite ship(s): This year I was introduced to Marylily and Rosekiller and idk they just don't vibe with me.
AO3 Fic Writers/Artists/Creators/Readers who have inspired me and my writing this year:
@itsphantasmagoria for their incredible Drarry video game
@sleepstxtic for her incredible range of fic and nuanced depictions of canon including my fav fic of the year!
@anaxandria-writes for binding my fic!!! I am so grateful and inspired.
@givereadersahug for organizing @hprecfest and always being so joyous and enthusiastic about rare pairs (you will be very missed, my dear 💗)
Countdown
5️⃣ Top 5 works I’m most proud of from 2022 (not necessarily my most popular)
For I have Found Salvation [Snarry, E, 7.1k] — for @snarryauctoberfest with priest Severus and parishioner Harry. My very first Snarry fic!
Of Dreams and Death [Dronarry, T, 2.3k] — for @dronarryfest and had so much fun plopping the characters into the Sandman AU.
up here, i'm floating [Mollytrix, M, 1.2k] — for the @hpsaffics Secret Santa Exchange. This is possibly one of my fav ships. I'm glad I got the chance to write them as angsty as I wanted.
Such a Sweetheart [Fleuratrix, T, 2.4k] — for the HPFC server Untagged Fest. A horror coffeeshop AU!
Kinktober 2023 [Multiship, E, total 15.5k] — technically a series but my first time participating in Kinktober. I was worried I wasn't going to finish all the days in time.
4️⃣ Top 4 current WIPs that I’m most excited to release in 2023
Honestly no idea yet. I have a lot of ideas on the back burner but none that are MUST DO RIGHT NOW. But I will say that I'm excited for bunch of fests like @hptransfest @ladiesofhpfest @hptriadfest and @hp-rarepairs
3️⃣ Top 3 biggest improvements in my writing over the past year
Smut!! I've developed my smut writing a lot. Kinktober really opened my eyes to a lot of kinks as well 👀
Tone: I think I'm getting a lot better at matching tone in my writing for consistent characterizations and building atmosphere
Estimating word count: I've gotten so much better at looking at an idea and predicting how long the final story is going to be.
2️⃣ Top 2 resolutions (ways I wish to improve my writing/blog) for the new year
FINISH A LONGER WORK!! This was on my resolutions from last which I didn't complete lol. It's okay, I'll try again this year.
Create a more consistent writing schedule
1️⃣ Number 1 favorite line I’ve written this year!
Harry Potter has a tiny dick. It’s just a fact of life. The Chosen Microdick, the Small Saviour, the Boy with an Itty Bitty Package. And oh, how Draco loves it.
From The Chosen Microdick [Drarry, E, 500], part of my Kinktober 2023 series and I just love the play on words here. A banging start to a banging series 🤣
Not sure who has already done a stats roundup/fic review/2023 thingy, so I'll leave the tag open.
Happy 2024! 💖
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clare-with-no-i · 17 days
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20 q's for fic writers
thank you sooo so much for tagging me @kay-elle-cee I unfortunately could not approach this in a completely earnest fashion due to who I am as a person, so everyone please take this slightly ersatz set of answers with all of the love I intend…which is a lot I swear…
AO3 Username: clarewithnoi (pronounced 'clare with no eye')
1. How many works do you have on A03? lol I keep orphaning stories when they annoy me but for now 37 (I think?)
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 403,419…what is this word city
3. What fandoms do you write for? Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, others which I have not published lol
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
not the statistics page!!!!!!! john mulaney voice that's the thing I'm sensitive about!!!!!!
one long day (all my love will make you shake) at 1,151 WOW my god I did not realize it had surpassed 1k!!! did I know that? holy shit!
I will carry you, always at 873 ok this is also shocking but I do know that my they-lived AUs tend to be more popular and they're older so they've had time to accumulate hits
foreigner's god at 701 still can't believe this <3
theogony at 682 (!!)
growing pains at 675 another they-lived AU! I really carved out a niche early on
5. Do you respond to comments? don't look at me…I always want to…I swear I just get overwhelmed…put the gun down please…
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? uhhhh jesus idk, probably the derelict art of letting go? I don't write a lot of angst but I guess that one is on the sadder side
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? foreigner's god! or I will carry you always! in one of them I contend with reincarnation and shared grief and second chances at life. in the other one they hook up in the DADA classroom. so it's a toss-up
8. Do you get hate on fics? not really, and given the number of public fights I've had on this account you'd think that people would take their dislike of me to ao3 more often, but everyone's been remarkably charitable in that regard. thanks guys <3
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? only if I can exorcise personal trauma through it. or if it's 2020 and I'm dissociating in my studio apartment.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? no and no one say theogony or I'm turning this bus around
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? yessiree and it was not pleasant!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes! a few! the ones with my permission were lovely. the ones without my permission not as much.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? naur…
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? it's like a three-way tie between jily, percabeth, and zelink tbh! but I've mainly read jily fic in the past few years I think. but this answer can change dependent on me developing a new hyperfixation lmao
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? the last time I answered this question I did it as a joke and then I wrote theogony about it so I'm going to choose peace and just plead the fifth here lest I commit to another wip that'll take three years
16. What are your writing strengths? I do a lot of (an excess of) research, I'm good at description, I am funny when I want to be, I've had some really good prose moments if I do say so myself (I do)
17. What are your writing weaknesses? I am structurally a very weak writer, I can't be succinct, I don't have a great literature background so I never really know what I'm in conversation with and have limited points of reference for writing, I am very bad at writing characters who are subtle about their emotions/romantic feelings, I submit to time pressure and rush myself, the list goes on
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I've always wanted to write a fic in Spanish omgggg
19. First fandom you wrote for? either Zelink or Percabeth when I was like 12 lol.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written? theogony!
tagging @thequibblah yes I know you've been tagged already. cope <3 and @mipwrites go get 'em champ
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amtrak12 · 7 months
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ATTENTION ALL BERING AND WELLS FANS.
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to get my fanfic But You're Friction to 10,000 total hits on AO3. (link above)
Why? Because I'm in the process of writing a very long Lucifer fic and given both the larger fandom size and the longer length of the story, that fic is swiftly on its way to hitting 10k hits which would be my very first time ever hitting that milestone. And as awesome as that is (it is very awesome!!), I kind of like the idea of one of my Bering and Wells fics hitting 10k first, and But You're Friction is soooooo close!!!
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^Screenshot of my stats graph on AO3. But You're Friction is on the left with 9,964 hits. (It was actually at 9,959 hits for several months but I just had a guest click through and read the whole fic yesterday so it went up!) My Lucifer fic, Can We Keep Her, is the bar on the right and it's currently sitting at 8,833 hits and closing fast. I was getting about 700 hits per chapter, but this latest update has already netted me 900. Which means my very next update could cross over the edge.
Am I proud of my Lucifer fic? Absolutely. Do I think it's better written than my Bering and Wells stuff? Yes, obviously. I've learned a shit ton in the last decade of writing. BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!!
Getting But You're Friction across the 10k mark first is about the nostalgia. It's about the pride. It's about every small fandom -- but especially OUR little small fandom -- proving that we work harder than anyone else!!
This Bering and Wells fic is a high school AU with smut that I swear I wrote in a fever dream because it only took me like a week to draft with no planning and no plotting. I refuse to reread it because of said smut scenes, but I remember feeling very proud of it at the time and the response was extremely positive so I feel like the quality could hold up.
It is 5 chapters and 20,000 words long so I either need 8 people to click through the entire fic or 36 individuals to click on the story link to get us to 10k hits. You are under no obligation to read or comment on the fic. I literally just want my best received Bering and Wells fic to be the first of my fics to hit 10,000. lol
Also June 2023 was the ten year anniversary of when I posted the fic, so it seems extra fitting to hit 10k hits this year :) We have until October 20th (my next Lucifer update) to do this. So let's go nerdsbians!! \0/
Thank you for your time! Hope your current blorbos and faves are keeping you well fed on awesome meaty stuff! <3
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strandnreyes · 6 months
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
@rmd-writes @welcometololaland @three-drink-amy thanks for providing me with procrastination material <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
58
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
957,577. with the unpublished words of meet you after dark, I'll be very close to 1,000,000. I'm almost certain I'll hit it by the end of the year (at least that's my goal)
3. What fandoms do you write for?
911 Lone Star
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
anchor up to me, love (this being my top fic by kudos is so shocking to me lol it's just a 3x05 coda that I think I wrote the day after the episode aired, I really didn't think it was that special)
pushing boundaries
haunted by the ghost of you
one single thread
yours for the weekend
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes, I try to respond to them all! That being said, I've very behind right now but I promise I'll get back to you!
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
hold on - This is probably the only 'unhappy' ending I have, but it's more so just unresolved because it's a 3x01 coda written before any of the other episodes in that arc aired. and 3x01 is not a happy episode lol
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
they pretty much all do in general so I don't think I could pick one specifically that stands out
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not really, but it has happened a few times
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Yes, but usually incorporated within a story, not as a standalone. I think the only PWP fic I wrote is when push comes to shove. and even that has some plot
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
No crossovers
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
As far as I'm aware, no
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I don't think so
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not officially
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Carlos and TK <3
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
idk if I can call this a WIP, but there's always been an idea in my mind about writing a fic inspired by the book Carlos was writing in as if you were a mythical thing. it's a 1970s camp counselor slasher murder mystery style fic that I wrote a little bit of for this prompt fill, but I don't know if a full au will ever come out of it. shame because the playlist and moodbord would slap
16. What are your writing strengths?
world building, banter, angst that feels like a punch in the gut, giving the happy ending room to breathe
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
smut I feel like. need to learn new ways to say the same exact thing
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I think it makes total sense and feels authentic for it to be there every once in a while for non-crucial story details if a character speaks another language
19. First fandom you wrote for?
911 Lone Star
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I'm going to go with your first string. I think that has my most full-fledged character arcs and full circle storyline. It's my longest fic and I never really got sick of writing it, which is a pretty good indicator that I enjoyed it
no pressure tagging @reyesstrand @carlos-in-glasses @theghostofashton @orchidscript @freneticfloetry + anyone else!
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welcometololaland · 6 months
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20 Questions aka. Oversharing on the Internet version 92840938
Thanks for the tag @rmd-writes - how did you know i didn't feel like doing work?
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
excluding the ones i've flagged for deletion (when i get around to it) - 46.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
972,000 and i'm going to hit a million by the end of the year! i have one co-written collab so we can subtract about 30k (ish) from that total (but with ALTA i'll still make a milly woohoo).
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Red, White & Royal Blue, 911 Lone Star, Top Gun Maverick (occasionally)
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
ah man this kills me because it excludes my most beloved fic (love game lol). in descending order:
Speak for Yourself (RWRB, my very first fic for that fandom! 2021 me in her study writing a random 3k first chapter could never have imagined being this lucky)
The Ring-In (with @dustratcentral) (911 Lone Star, this fic makes me feel like my Tarlos writing has gotten worse instead of better lmao)
Fifty First Dates (RWRB)
(Not) A Cinderella Story (RWRB)
Cursed is a State of Mind (with @dustratcentral) (RWRB, just about to hit 1k! there's something magical about an ifyoustay collab apparently)
jeez i never realised how RWRB heavy that is...
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Always. You put in the effort to comment on my work, I'm gonna put in the effort to reply to you. I appreciate comments so much, even if they're just emojis or one line or whatever. I appreciate every single one of them (except the mean ones).
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I don't usually go here, but I think it has to be Contaminated (RWRB).
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
99% of my fics have happy endings (except for the fic above lol) but I'd say the happiest ending is in (Un)Professional Services because they're So. In. Love. and they just *spoiler* together and they're about to *spoiler*.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Rarely and I usually ignore it or delete it (so there's no point doing it).
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
A Lot. Usually served with a heavy side of feelings - I like it when the smut drives the plot, when it helps the characters have those Oh Shit realisations. I'm also a sucker for explicit, enthusiastic consent.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I have written like 30% of a RWRB/Lone Star crossover that may never see the light of day because I keep forgetting about it.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
If I have, I don't know about it.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes! I've had a few of my fics translated by incredible people! Phonography, Warm Whispers and Baby, Make Your Move have all been translated and can be found above. I'm fine with people translating my fics, so long as they're linked to the original and remain on ao3.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes and I love it. I want to do it more often! @rmd-writes collab was an amazing experience. i've also loved working with @dustratcentral on so many of my more unhinged works.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
I don't think I can choose between Alex/Henry and TK/Carlos.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Probably that damn crossover, unless there's like significant interest in me finishing it lmao.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Oh no. giving myself a compliment help. I would say worldbuilding. dialogue/banter. gratuitous feelings during sex.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
exposition. being concise. overwriting to the max @three-drink-amy (this is an attack on you as well but we are we).
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
i've done it before but to be honest i'm scared to. 1) i don't want to get it wrong. 2) i don't want to annoy my very talented friends that can speak other languages by asking them 10 billion questions lol.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
...I plead the 5th.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Love Game. I don't care that it's not as popular. it's my child. Also, ALTA (because of the many tears that went into it). We are bonded by trauma.
open tag on this one and also calling: @reyesstrand @strandnreyes @heartstringsduet @alrightbuckaroo @three-drink-amy @goodways @iboatedhere @wandering-night19 @birdclowns @liminalmemories21 @indomitable-love @clottedcreamfudge @sherryvalli @cha-melodius @cricketnationrise @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @theghostofashton @orchidscript @lemonlyman-dotcom @kiwiana-writes @freneticfloetry @sunshinestrand @nelsonnicholas @tailoredshirt @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @lightningboltreader @hippolotamus @dumbpeachjuice @tellmegoodbye @ladytessa74 @louisii-reyes-strand @beautifulhigh @athousandrooms @villiageidiot @inflarescent @marjansmarwani @safeashousespdf @tintagel-or-cockleshells @sanjuwrites @lilythesilly @kiloskywalker @noxsoulmate
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wingsonghalo · 4 months
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by @cnnmonbimee! Thank you for the tag!! Read her awesome answers here!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 66! More than I thought were on there tbh!
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? Uhhh apparently it's 684,757! Less than I thought!
3. What fandoms do you write for? In order of most fics to least: Ace Attorney, JSHK, My Hero Academia, Mob Psycho 100, Homestuck, Hunter x Hunter, Phineas and Ferb, and Supernatural. I've also written a lot of Pokemon stuff, but somehow that has escaped Ao3 despite it being my longest fandom LOL. Working on a Pokemon SV one currently though 👀
4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Project: Matchmakers (shocker, I know), Sleep (Too) Tight (It's always been slowly but steadily popular), Force of Habit (bit of a surprise there honestly), Project: Matrimony (less surprising), and The Stuff of Dreams. So what I am seeing here is that no one leaves kudos on my JSHK or MP100 or MHA fics :') Some of these fics are one-shots, so it's kind of surprising! I wish PlayWright had gotten more attention; that fic killed me while I was writing it. I'm not giving number of kudos because I'm not comfortable with that and it makes me feel bad about myself haha,,,
5. Do you respond to comments? I try to! I've fallen behind on responding to them in the past 2 years or so because life has been so busy, though…
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably A Practice, For Now?? LMAO it's also my first JSHK and the one with the most kudos HMM COULD THIS FANDOM BE ADDICTED TO ANGST PERHAPS??! I don't write angst a lot!! What can I say, I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Almost all of my fics end happily, LOL. Pick any of them that actually has an ending.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Not commonly. I've gotten anon hate before about them on tumblr on rare occasions, but usually my comments on ao3 stay pretty nice.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do sometimes, but I'm so shy about it that I rarely ever post it /)//w//(\ Usually I just share it among friends, haha!
10. Do you write crossovers? Nope, and I never will!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes. Someone tried to run Project: Matchmakers through a translator to hide the word matches and sell it as an ebook on Amazon, but they only bothered to hide it for chapter 1 so someone reported it to me and then in retaliation I started actually selling it on Amazon for the lowest price I could because the thief was trying to sell the shittier version for like 7 dollars LSFJ;AKLD. Read about the whole debacle here.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, quite a few! People have been great about asking me for permission! 💖
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, here and there! Usually it's either fics where I have written one part and someone else has written another scene, or someone had me look over something they'd written and I added so much commentary or threw additional ideas at them so much that the story ended up changing and I somehow became a co-author, LOL.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Oh my god don't make me answer that ;alskdjfl;k. If I wrote a fic for them ever, they're my favorite. I have so many favorites that I've never written fics for, too.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? THE UNDERCOVER FIIIIIC [sobs] and also Left on Read hnnngh
16. What are your writing strengths? Emotions!! I'm super good at those! I'm also really strong at dialogue and banter, and making my writing kinda witty/funny.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Describing settings ;w; I write my scenes like I draw my art: in Descriptionless Blank Voids lkas;dlkf. I also struggle with the flow of action scenes sometimes, though I think they usually turn out okay if I spend enough time on them. I also probably use too many adverbs and adjectives, but y'know what? Fuck it I like my descriptive words thank you very much
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? As long as you're checking that it means what you think it means, or possibly asking a native speaker if you're unsure about context or need a sensitivity reader, I think it's fine. It annoys me if I have to check a footnote every other line, but if you can mostly understand it without a translation in context, it can be kinda nice! At least it says you're trying more than phonetically spelling out an accent, which--remember, kids!--is always cringe! 👍
19. First fandom you wrote for? On Ao3, it was Homestuck. On the internet in general, it was Animal Crossing and Pokemon, LOL.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Don't make me cHOOSE BETWEEN MY BABIESSS 😭 I dunno man! Project: Matchmakers is my magnum opus, but the PlayWright is lowkey kind of a masterpiece, I love so many of my JSHK fics to bits and pieces, a lot of my MP100 and MHA fics are very special to me, I've been trying to write a HxH one for YEARS and have poured my heart into making it beautiful, just UGHHH every single one of my fics I have vivid memories of conceptualizing and working on and most of them are my favorite to some degree!
I tag @carochinha, @kittykatz009, @toastytoaster22, @ittybittytoostormy, and anyone else who would like to answer these questions!!
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poppypickle · 1 month
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by mi amor @cfr749, so obvs I gotta do this.
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 29
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 230,379
3. What fandoms do you write for? I've written the most for The Rookie. I've also dabbled in: The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, Avengers, Community, and Miss Scarlet and the Duke.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Lots of Chenford up in here...
• Come a Little Closer • I Can’t Help Myself • Want You to Stay • Bang Bang (Look What You Started) • Break Up With Him
5. Do you respond to comments?
I do! It's really important to me to respond to anyone who takes the time to leave a comment. That reciprocal appreciation is a really vital part of fandom for me.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Hmmm...probably Let Me Tell You a Story About War, which adds further angst to the canonically angsty ending for Clint and Natasha in Avengers: Endgame.
But all of my Gale-centric Hunger Games fics are suitably angsty too. 😅
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I Can’t Help Myself is ooey gooey sweet. Let Me Name the Stars for You isn't sweet in the same way, but giving Gale and Johanna a happy ending still warms my heart.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not really. I have found most people in my fandoms to be very kind and considerate.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
"Yup... the horny kind?"
Lana, I LOL'ed. That pretty much sums it up. I had Chenford banging in closets and on tables and in cars and in bar bathrooms! Very satisfying for all, I hope.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
No. They aren't really my thing.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 
I think someone asked me if they could translate Let Me Name the Stars for You many years ago, but I'm not sure I ever saw the finished translation.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes! Want You to Stay with the amazing @cfr749. The collaboration brought me so much joy, taught me so much about writing with someone else, and helped me push through some major writing block. Lana is an amazing friend and we need to write something together again!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
I can never choose a favorite, so I'll say that my favorite ships that I never finished fic for are Dan/Blair and Jonsa. I have quarter-written fics for each pairing somewhere in my notes and google docs.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
The one I currently have rattling around in my brain where Miss Scarlet and the Duke's William and Eliza try out a Victorian friends with benefits thing. 😅
16. What are your writing strengths?
This is too loaded of a question. Hmmm...I think I write humor and banter-laced-with-feelings well.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I don't love writing climactic love confession moments, and I think it shows. I think I could let my characters be sappier sometimes. I also don't write action very well! Muddling my way through the gas station hostage crisis (LOL) in Want You To Stay was a STRUGGLE.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I would want a native speaker to review before publishing.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
First fandom I wrote for (but never published) was General Hospital. Jason & Robin 4eva. 😂
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Let Me Name the Stars for You. It's a quiet little thing that covers a lot of emotional ground in not that many words, and I really love exploring how broken people find ways to put themselves back together again.
I also loved some of the moments I created for Hermione in Could You Leave Me With a Scar?
Tagging @itsoneofthemuses @crose84 @farfarawaygirl - but no pressure!
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jtl07 · 8 months
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jtl07 fics, summer 2023
Kinda liked doing the half year recap in June and had planned to do another one at the end of the year, but since I had quite the posting spree this month, decided to do one now.
General stats
Total on this pseud: 12 (all avatrice / Warrior Nun fandom)
Fics posted (chronological order):
to all the girls (to you, to me) -- or: Ava watching people fall in love with Beatrice, including herself
leave it all behind (I’ll see you on the other side) -- or: Ava comes back - healthy, whole, quiet. Too quiet.
the long, delirious, burning blue -- or: the moody Top Gun 2 (Maverick) AU
another little peace (restful pieces): something old, something blue -- or: the girls buy cereal; or or: Bea learning the difference between safety and familiarity
looks for you in everything (finds you there) -- or: Switzerland vignettes based on items found in their bedroom
Enhanced Beings Tech Support transcripts -- or: What if there was technical phone support for “enhanced beings” like halo bearers?
another little peace (restful pieces): lets you see the wonder of it all -- or: Ava meets a member of her family
another little peace (restful pieces): like a boat -- or: Beatrice plays Stray Gods
late night vigil -- or: camila learns about beatrice's strap; she helps in her own way
another little peace (restful pieces): to always wake up to you -- or: avatrice proposal based off of SimplyKorra's fantastic headcanon
another little peace (restful pieces): perchance to dream (no more) -- or: Ava wakes up from a dream
can't go back -- or: Five times Beatrice tries a food for a second time
(More numbers, thoughts, and some plans below the cut)
More numbers
Total words: 36720
Shortest: 685 (to always wake up to you)
Longest (one-shot): 5987 (the long, delirious, burning blue)
Average/Median word count: 3060 / 2019
General thoughts
Nearly 10k more words in the past 3 months than I wrote the first half of the year - I guess being in a safe space after your life has been turned upside down makes a difference, huh?
I still don't know what happened this month - specifically, the two week period from 8/14 - 8/26 where my fingers were just trying their best to keep up with the stories pressing in my brain lol (willing to bet it's somethingsomething healing and how it can take many forms, like this kind of intense spike)
Fun fact: This is only the second time I've written a one-shot over 5k words this year (3rd time ever in my many years of writing fic). It's always interesting to look at the average / median word count because it's been firmly in the 2k range. I still want to challenge myself with longer work, they just take time and energy yknow? Under 3k, I feel really comfortable now, which is a cool feeling
Fic that surprised me:
Honestly, everything that happened in that intense two week period (i.e. everything posted after "the long, delirious, burning blue") was a genuine surprise. Every time one of those ideas happened, I felt like I was just trying to keep up. I was really glad to have the space - emotionally, physically - to write those stories.
And I guess what surprised me also was just how wide a range they all were. I've been trying to work on just "writing what will get written" and learning to turn off the judgemental voice in my head that says things like, "you should be writing more," or "you should be writing better ideas." It was a surprise that these ideas just kinda flowed without much friction, yknow? I'm taking it as a sign of growth :)
Fic that was the hardest to write:
Oh gosh hands down leave it all behind (I’ll see you on the other side) - I had to discard full drafts and start over from scratch multiple times to get to what's actually posted. I had tried different perspectives, different settings, different points in the story, but I just kept getting stuck. I think part of it was because when I write, I usually start with a vibe or an arc - with this one, I was starting with the turn, the twist - which I don't often write either. So writing this kind of story was new on all fronts
can't go back was also a bit frustrating to write - I've been dealing with a sudden recurrence of brain fog so I know part of it was that, but idk, I feel like it could have been tighter thematically
Fic that I'm proud of:
Definitely the Top Gun 2/Maverick AU, the long, delirious, burning blue. I mentioned this in a comment that when I first had the idea, I'd expected it to be more of an action fic - I don't often write action, so I thought it'd be a good opportunity to practice. But, as with most of my work, it ended up quite moody, more a reflection of grief and duty.
Why am I proud of it? Because despite my initial intent, and my initial disappointment when I realized the direction it was going, I allowed myself to go with it. Writing this piece helped me accept where I am in my writing, to accept the stories I choose to write and how I write them. This fic was not at all what I had expected, but it turned out to be exactly what I needed
Runner up: looks for you in everything (finds you there) - the final word count shocked me, honestly, I didn't expect to write so many vignettes. But I was mostly proud of the diligence behind this and letting my sappy side run free lol
WIPs in the wings
Lol my WIP list is hella long - and that's not counting a whole separate document I have that's just prompts. I still have some Supercorp ideas that I've not yet fleshed out that are more on the "experimental" side that play with form and formatting - I've also some avatrice ones in "genre" as well.
Surprisingly, I've a couple AUs I've been turning over in my mind - I blame playing Stray Gods for making me remember some video games I'd grown up playing lol Oh and I've been pondering how to do a litrpg/gamelit style fic as well.
There's a couple longer one-shots that I've been pecking at but are going to take me a while to finish - there's one that's sort of a sister to every leaf that falls (never stops falling) (not a continuation, more like a sister in terms of vibe and tone), and another that explores Ava having a new ability (will I ever stop being enamored with Switzerland era? The answer is no lol).
But mostly, I'm just going to vibe with happens - "write what will get written" and all. We'll see where it all goes!
If you've read this far, thanks a ton for your support and going on the ride that is my fics lol - much appreciation to y'all!
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nodirectionhome-ao3 · 7 months
Text
20 QUESTIONS GAME
Thanks for the tag @jfleamont!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
6.
2. What's your total AO3 words count?
256,418
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Just HP!
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1. Kindly Stopped for Me – Multi-chapter: Lily lives AU, in progress. 2. This Mad, Mad Love – One-shot: Fluffy Jily love confession. 2,185 words. 3. The Joker and The Queen – Multi-chapter: Jily fake dating, in progress. 4. A Rollercoaster Kind of Rush – One-shot: 6th year Lily realizing her feelings for James. 4,124 words. 5. The Brightest Star in the Sky – One-shot: Post-war Hinny stargazing. 2,293 words.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes!!! I love comments so much. They give me the encouragement I need to keep writing even when I'm feeling self-doubt or writer's block.❤️
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
As of right now, none of my completed fics have unhappy endings! I guess the closest is The Brightest Star in the Sky because it's post-war so grief is an essential part of the fic. But the story is about Harry and Ginny finding a moment of comfort in the midst of their pain. So...does that count?
My Jily one-shots were written so that I could give myself a break from the heartache of James being dead in Kindly Stopped for Me so they are all mostly happy😅 (although there is some angst in Mosaic Broken Hearts).
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Probably. This Mad, Mad Love. Although I'm just now realizing that several of my one-shots end with love confessions lol. I guess that's something I really wanted to write this year😅
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Occasionally on Kindly Stopped for Me. It hasn't been that bad, compared to what I know other authors have had to deal with, but yeah. I've gotten pretty liberal with the delete button recently, which has been good for my peace of mind, and I might turn off guest comments if this negative trend continues in the future (though I don't want to do that if I don't have to because not all guest comments are negative!)
I write for fun, as a hobby, so I have no time for people who think it's appropriate to leave unsolicited criticism or snarky comments on my work. Writing is an emotionally vulnerable thing to do, sharing writing publicly even more so, and I won't engage with people who don't respect that.
That said, I've been very fortunate in that the vast majority of comments I receive are lovely and encouraging. The Jily community in particular is a wonderful place full of people who have been so nice to me, and I'm constantly amazed by all the people (from the Jily community and beyond) who take the time out of their day to share kindness about my stories!!! Even a simple comment really really means a lot!
9. Do you write smut. If so what kind?
I haven't yet. But I might in the future. Who knows!
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
No. That's just not my thing!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I don't think so. I hope not!!!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope!
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
Does the Jilytober Jilyexpress count? Because if so, yes. If not, then no. (but I'm open to it!) 😅
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
I'd definitely say Jily. It's the ship that got me into fanfiction (the first fic I ever read was TLAT!) and it's still my favorite. But Hinny is a very very close second! I love those two ships with my whole heart.
Outside of HP, I'd have to go with Percabeth. I've never read any fanfics (maybe I will someday), but the Percy Jackson books were a huge part of my childhood!
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
I don't have one!! I know for a fact that I will finish Kindly Stopped for Me because I have the whole story plotted out and it takes up SO much of my thoughts at all times lol. My (possibly ambitious) goal is to finish it by February 6, 2024 because I posted the first chapter on February 6, 2023😅 But if I'm really productive I could potentially finish it by the end of 2023. We'll see! But it will for sure be finished either way.
As for The Joker and The Queen, I don't have the full plot outlined yet so I don't have a schedule in my mind of when it will be done. But I don't have any doubts that I'll finish it!
16. What are your writing strengths?
I think I'm good at dialogue. That's something that comes naturally to me, maybe in part because I have a lot of theatre experience and have read MANY plays in my life. So dialogue is definitely the most essential part of that!
I also think I'm good at writing angst. It seems to come more naturally than fluff, even though I'm generally happy these days.😂
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Brevity. I know it's the soul of wit, but it is not one of my strengths!!
I wish I could be paid by the word like Charles Dickens. I'd probably be thriving financially if that was my life😂
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
I mean...I took French for 7 years in school and then attended university in a bilingual English/French city. So...theoretically I could write some dialogue in French. Maybe? I can read it pretty well, even though I'm still not confident with speaking it. But I'm kind of rusty on it and I don't think I have the confidence to attempt to write creatively in French unless I have a beta reader who is more fluent.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I've only ever written for HP.
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
It has to be Kindly Stopped for Me. I'm really enjoying writing it and there are certain chapters that I am VERY excited to share with you all!
Tagging: @joyseuphoria, @suzyq31, @abihastastybeans, and @bronzeagepizzeria!! (I'm not sure who all has been tagged yet, so no pressure whatsoever if you've already been tagged or don't feel like doing this!)
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