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#does this make sense. i hope it does. they make me ill
littlerequiem · 19 hours
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— midnight ventures ˚⁎⁺ levi ackerman x f!reader (18+ MDNI)
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You shouldn’t have looked and he shouldn’t have been there. But Fate can have a funny sense of humor. The punchline that night? Stumbling onto your naked Captain in a hot spring… and doing something about it.
content — Rated E - Canon universe, Snowed-in, Winter, Hot Springs, Power Dynamics, Smut, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Oral (f. receiving), Authority Kink, Unprotected sex, Creampie, Biting, Multiple Orgasms, Light dom/sub dynamics, Soft!Dom Levi (wc: 11.7k).
Thanks to my BETA @stellar-smth. Written for @sixpennydame following this prompt: "I can't get enough of you."
Crossposted on AO3.
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The mountain is a lonely, cruelly cold place.
Up here, everything is covered by planes of white, endless valleys rolling and coming. Icicles cling onto winding branches, while roots are drowned in bitter cold. Even nature seems to be at a complete standstill here.
Getting lost here would be ill-advised.
And yet, here you are, stranded, with the last person you ever expected to be with.
Captain Levi Ackerman.
“That was our last one, sir,” you say as you lower the flare gun, securing it to the harness strapped to your wool jacket. Gray smoke, usually reserved to warn of the presence of abnormals, now towers above you. It was a last hope to signal someone to your location and unfortunately, no answer has come.
You are, in every sense of the word, lost.
"You grew up around here, didn't you?" comes Levi's voice, that his gravelly and magnetic tone that always makes you instantly zero-in on him. "Any of this look familiar?”
You meet his impassive stare, and you try to ignore the familiar flutters forming in the pit of your stomach.
“I did. But I’m sorry, sir, I don’t recognize these parts,” you answer evenly, glancing at the footprints in the snow. “Everything looks the same to me.”
“I see.”
You rub your hands over your covered arms, trying to create your own means of warmth. "My father used to say these mountains were a death trap come winter. I suppose there was some truth to his words.”
“A death trap.” Levi clicks his tongue. “A novelty in our lives, I’m sure.”
Your chuckle beneath your breath.  
Somewhere to the north of here is a military outpost, the destination of your supply round. Unfortunately, as things stand now, you won't reach it on time. Perhaps if you had ODM gear or horses, you might have already reached it. But winter in the mountains renders both useless: the hooks don't secure properly because of the ice, and horses aren't trained to navigate such terrains.
Hence, you are doing everything by foot. 
“It's going to be dark soon,” Levi points out in a monotone voice, as if this situation wasn’t a matter of life-and-death.
You stare at the darkening clouds over the horizon. "Yeah."
Levi kicks some snow with his boot, white particles clouding the air. “Let’s head back down, I saw a cabin on our way up.”
“Yes, sir.”
With his directives now laid out, you begin the walk down. Levi sets the pace, keeping a diligent speed that ensures your bodies stay warm and your minds stay sharp. For a while, that’s all there is to it. Nothing but the crunching of footsteps in snow and the wind howling across white nothing.
The silence gives you a moment to yourself, one where you're able to take in your surroundings, including the sight of your Captain next to you.  
Like you, Levi’s appearance is marked by the cold. His eyes, red-rimmed; eyelashes, glistening white; his cheeks, flushed with a rosy hue; his hair, flowing and ebbing midnight. 
It suits him, this look. All dressed in white, he looks beautiful.
Not exactly a surprise, you suppose. Your Captain could wear a rag and still look good.
It’s an objective, albeit unfortunate, truth. Your Captain is beautiful, magnetic, striking… and you happen to have a big, fat crush on him.
It’s not like it's a secret. You think everyone in the Corps knows at this point. The brats from the 104th love to tease you about it. So does Commander Hange, for that matter—somehow, you think it is no coincidence the two of you ended up paired for this mission.
Meddlers, they all are.
"Oi, focus on the road," Levi grumbles. 
Your cheeks warm, feeling like your Captain caught you red handed with your daydreams, even if you know that, objectively speaking, there's no way he did (Levi is many things, but a mind reader isn't one of them. Thank the Walls for that.) 
Despite knowing that, you can't help but stammer, "S-sir?" 
"You're not focused on the road. You're going to slip and hurt yourself." 
And he's right, of course. It is slippery. Dangerous, even.
But how exactly does your Captain even know you aren't focused on the path? He's not looking your way.
(Over the year, you've learned this hard truth: Levi always knows, somehow.)  
A snow storm has picked up by the time the cabin comes into view. Relief expands in your chest; you were just starting to lose the feeling of your toes.
The shelter appears to be deserted. Out of courtesy, you knock several times, checking the perimeters for signs of life, but when it’s clear no one is inside, your Captain decides that survival precedes politeness.
He surprises you with a new skill: opening locked doors.
“Dare I ask when you learned to pick locks, s-sir?” you stutter as he uses the tools from his bag. His movements are nimble and practiced, like a well-oiled machine. “S-secret skill from the Underground?”
From his crouched position, your Captain shoots you a blank look. “You may not ask.”
With a click, the door swings open.
You enter, raising your oil lamp to illuminate the inside. A half-decorated living room with a dining table, a sofa, and a fireplace. There are additional rooms to the back.
"Nobody’s lived here for months,” you comment, sniveling.
“They intended to come back.” He bobs his head to the right. "There's fresh wood and supplies over there."
You hum in agreement, teeth chattering. “It’s-s common enough for folks beneath the mountains to have a second house up here. Maybe they plan on coming up come s-summer.”
Levi grunts out a sound, presumably not caring too much as to why the house is well-equipped, but glad that it is all the same. Either way, you're clearly trespassing on someone's property, and you hope that whoever this house belongs to won't mind soldiers occupying it for one night.
Knowing the Captain, they'll probably find it in a cleaner state than the one they left it in, anyway.
But before that, your Captain seems to have other plans. 
“Before we do anything else, we need to take care of you,” he declares.
Your Captain’s gray eyes then narrow onto you, roving up and down. His attention makes you straighten in place, feeling uneasy to be in his spotlight. Levi closes the door with a swing of a leg. His stare never strays from his thorough inspection.
A shiver licks your spine. “S-sir?”
“You’re shaking like a leaf. Strip, now.”
Your stomach stupidly flips at Levi’s orders. 
"You need to change into something dry," he adds in a rueful tone.  
You chuckle nervously while your brain goes into overdrive. 
... Shit. 
This is going to be a long night, isn't it?
Trying to push aside all the ways you feel overwhelmed by Levi's presence (you are, after all, fucking cold), you begin to remove your ice-coated gloves. This, however, proves to be an exceptionally painful endeavor—you suck in a breath when you realize you can't completely bend your fingers. Oh, no. Why can’t you bend your fingers?
“Damn it, you’re like an icicle,” comes Levi’s sharp voice behind you. Before you can make sense of anything, you feel your Captain by your right side, seizing your hands to inspect them. 
You wince.
Levi is right, of course. Your fingers feel as though they are frozen, though you know they’re not. You can still move them, just painfully.
Still, you’re not exactly feeling peachy right now. You’re visibly trembling and your balance is growing more wobbly. And why is your vision so hazy?
“Why didn’t you speak up earlier?” Levi scolds. He shrugs off his own gloves and scatters them to the floor. He grabs your hands into his own, rubbing to create friction.
You stare, watching his slender fingers—rough and calloused and yet, so gentle—encompass your own. It’s the first time he touches you like this, and even if there’s nothing romantic about the gesture, your heart somersaults all the same.
(Stress and romantic attraction cause such similar reactions, you note in passing.) 
“I’m s-sorry, sir. I really didn’t realize I was feeling so cold,” you say. 
“Do you have something dry to change into?"
You nod.
“Good. Go change while I get the fireplace going,” he tells you.
You do just that. 
While Levi works on the chimney, you discover that the rest of the house consists of two bedrooms and a lavatory. You don’t waste time inspecting them; you quickly lock yourself in a room. The first layer to go is your coat, but everything else is eventually removed. You change into dry pants and a sweater retrieved from your bag. Then you lay out your belongings, as well as Levi’s scattered coat and gloves, on wooden chairs, placing them near the starting fire, hoping (praying) that they dry by tomorrow morning.
Levi’s just finished throwing several logs into the fire. He stands up to meet you, looking at you through a half-lidded stare.
Unlike you, your Captain's clothing is relatively dry; only his gray shirt sports wet patches, the fabric clinging to his chest. You try not to stare at his well-defined muscles for too long.
(Even if you really, really, really wish you could.) 
The beginning of crackling amber hovers on one side of Levi’s face, creating sunken shadows on the opposite side.
“Looks like cleaning will need to wait. You’re trembling like a drowned rat,” he says.
You conceal a smile. “L-like the ones in the Underground, s-sir?”
“Yeah, and I’ve seen enough for a lifetime.” His eyes narrow to slithers. “Just… sit your ass down on the sofa. I’ll find blankets and make tea.” You stare at him blankly, which he seems to take as some kind of signal to press the urgency in his tone. “Fucking stay awake, got it?” 
You give him a confused look, but soon catch a glimpse of yourself in one of the windows. Ah. You're not looking so well—your lips are chapped, and there's shadows plaguing your eyes.
Levi finds several blankets in a wardrobe. With your help, he moves the sofa from one side of the room to the next, positioning it right in front of the fire. Levi forces you to sit (“But sir, I can—” “Stop arguing and sit the fuck down.”), and soon, he layers covers over your shoulders.
The sofa shifts under his weight as he sits next to you.
“You alright?” he asks.
You nod, still groggy. You're still cold, but the tea is helping a little.
Still, you should really try to warm up now. You attempt to take a sip of your drink, but in your excitement, you forget the fact that fresh tea tends to be, in fact, piping hot.
It trickles down to a burning sensation down your throat. “Pah, I think I just burned my tongue.”
“Now I'm starting to think you take pleasure in inflicting pain on yourself.”
“N-no." You gulp nervously. "I just didn’t notice the tea was so hot.”
“It's tea."
"Yeah, well. I guess I'm still not thinking straight. It's just s-still so cold in here.”
You do your best to hug the cup of tea with both hands, still audibly shivering, while snuggling into the blankets Levi threw over you. In front of you, the hearth continues to warm, staining the room with a glow that's oddly comforting. 
A log splinters.
Then, Levi’s voice barrels through: “Hand over the tea.”
You turn towards him.
Your Captain is fixing you with a severe frown. Without questioning his orders, you hand him the drink. You think he might add some lukewarm water to it to make it drinkable, but to your surprise, he places both cups on the cold floor close to the edge of the sofa.
A confused look draws on your face.
What now?
“Fucking come here already,” your Captain orders.
And he gestures with two fingers in his direction.
That’s when you realize what Levi’s offering. He’s… beckoning you closer.
He wants to warm you up.
You gape at him.
This isn't happening. Is it? 
But apparently not interested in watching you mull this over, Levi doesn’t leave you time to consider his proposal. He yanks on the blankets draped over your shoulders, reeling you close. You heave as the back of your skull collides with his collarbone, and you readjust against the crook of his neck.
“S’ just for a moment,” he mumbles under his breath, arms settling by your side.
And who are you to contest that? He's your Captain, you can hardly disobey him (well, you know you could disobey this particular order, but it's too late for that now).
So you let him tuck you close, and you discover that Levi is warm, and you think how nice that feels after hours of walking in cold weather. In fact, Levi’s body rather reminds you of a furnace right now, burning at its strongest in winter. His embrace creates a little cocoon of body heat just for you; soon, all you can smell is him, the scent of tea leaves and cotton enveloping you into a lovely state of serenity. 
(You always did love Levi's scent.)
With enough elements grounding you, you let your head roll back, pressing against his right shoulder blade, trying to ignore his steel muscles (that you can, admittedly, finally feel to some degree—and they are just as hard as you always imagined they would be).
“Fuck, you’re freezing.” Your Captain’s voice rumbles against your back, presumably feeling the cold sting of your cheek as you nestle closer.
In response, Levi’s hands slot over your forearms, something careful and hesitant about his touch. You hold your breath, feeling his fingers spread against your sweater. There, he begins to rub up and down, repeated motions that create tiny tingles down their path.
The added friction renders you speechless.
It was one thing to be so close to him before; now, your Captain is essentially stroking you. His attempts to create warmth spread like wildfire, and in an absence of coherent thoughts, you let the fire consume you.
Soon, even the fireplace growing in size doesn’t seem to phase you. It licks the cold air, spreading from all sides, but it is nothing compared to the burning sensations simmering across your neck, your cheeks, and down to your core. It’s like Levi’s touch is commanding it everywhere, this warmth, leaving you flustered and confused.
Then Levi’s fingers make contact with your bare wrist, and you jolt.
Because unlike the rest of his body, his hands are freezing.
“What… Captain! Your hands are—w-wha—” You let your voice trail, heart plummeting in your chest, when you come to a realization, a realization that makes you a little frustrated. “Hey! You were cold all along as well!”
A clicking sound resonates against the shell of your ear. “Stop yapping.”
You try to move to face him, but Levi grabs your wrists with an iron grip, keeping you locked against the expanse of his chest, making his order quite clear.
“Quit squirming and stay put,” he mutters. 
“But, Captain, you gave me all the blankets,” you complain, for once foregoing your respect for him and letting your concern speak volumes instead. A decided frown settled between your brows. “What would I say to Hange if their best soldier died trying to save me?”
“I wasn't going to die."
"But what if you did?"
"Then I’m sure you’d have found a creative way to spin it.”
“You still shouldn’t have done that. I’m not worth Humanity’s Strongest.”
“Stop saying stupid shit and focus on staying warm.”
You sigh. Your Captain and his stubborn ways. He was never good at putting his needs on the line, and years of military service haven’t changed this fact.
Still, not finding the energy to argue back, you allow the conversation to die out.
It is only a minute later, as you try to relax back in your position that you notice that Levi’s breath has mellowed out as well. In fact, your Captain’s attempts at creating frictions have slowed in urgency. His pace is now languid; his fingers are wrapped around your shoulders while his thumbs slide up and down, up and down. Slow.
You imagine that the two of you rather look like two people lounging on a sofa after a long day's work.
Like lovers.
“Tea's ready,” comes Levi's husky voice, making you jump in your seat.
You swallow down all the feelings bubbling at the back of your throat—the ones begging and begging to be let out—keeping your face trained ahead.
“R-right. Um, thank you for that, Captain,” you say. "I feel all better now."
Breaking away from his embrace, you try to avoid his burning gaze. You grab both cups, handing him one without sparring him a glance.
Instead, you move to sit at the edge of your seat, far away from your Captain. Between the two of you, the covers bundle together, discarded.
“So, what do you think?” he asks.
You stare at your flustered reflection in the tea cup. "Mm?"
“Why the hell does it smell like old eggs in here?”
That takes you right out of it.
You finally look up at Levi, meeting his lidded stare. Old eggs?
“... Sorry?”
“The fucking stench,” he mutters, wrinkling his noise. “It reeks in here.”
And that’s when you realize that Levi is talking about the smell in the air, the scent that’s lingered everywhere since you entered the house, but you were too focused on everything else to notice.
An odor you know well enough.
“Oh,” you say dumbly, “that’s the smell of a hot spring.”
“What?”
You finish your cup of tea in one gulp, now just perfectly warm and drinkable, and place it back on the floor. “I think this house might have one.”
You swiftly get up, darting to the bedroom you changed in earlier.
And sure enough, as you pull the curtains open, you notice a familiar sight. The back gardens of the house, all dusted in white, are painted with steam and water.
A hot spring.
.... And you are, you realize, a complete idiot.
Why didn't you think of this before? You could have simply taken a dip to warm up.
“What’s that?” Levi’s monotone voice comes from behind. He’s close to you, hovering just behind your shoulders, but you do not turn around. You’re certain that if you do, that you will find him bathed by the moonlight and that you won’t be able to form a single coherent sentence.
“A natural body of water, sir. It’s what Commander Hange was talking about in their briefing for this mission. Hot springs are found all over these mountains..." You bite your lower lip. "I didn’t realize we were right next to a hot spring. I could have spared you all the effort in warming me up.”
“No thanks, I’ve no intentions in having us swim around in something that smells so foul,” he grumbles. “Besides, it’s not good to go from two extreme temperatures.”
You hum. “True enough.”
“It smells vile.”
“It’s the sulfur. It’s great for muscle tension.”
“Sounds dubious.”
“I promise, it’s true!”
Forgetting your own advice, you turn around to drive your point home, and you realize that Levi is close—that you could count his eyelashes, if you wanted. But you don’t, because normal soldiers don’t think about counting the eyelashes of their superior.
“W-When I was young," you stammer, "my parents sometimes brought me up to the mountains to swim in them. They’re perfectly safe.”
Levi makes a face. “I’ll pass. But I guess it’s good to know the stench isn’t coming from the house itself.”
You snort.
Levi’s eyes seem to soften, half-lidded as they were. And just as you suspected, the moonlight trickling in really does something to your Captain’s face, bathing in with a silver hue that brings out the blue in his eyes.
Don’t look at his lips, don’t look at his lips, don’t lips…
“Looks like titan steam,” the Captain suddenly comments, looking at the steam fogging the windows beyond your shoulders.
He takes a step back.
You let out a much-needed breath, one you didn’t realize you were holding all along. “Uh-huh. It does.”
You glance back towards the hot spring, noticing that the snowstorm is close to subsiding, a cloak of black draping the sky beyond.
“Well, I suppose we should get to work, now that we’re all warmed up, huh?” you suggest. 
“Yeah. Let's get this dusty-old house spotless.”
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That night, you can't fall asleep.
This in itself isn’t a rare occurrence—most Scouts have somewhat questionable sleeping habits. Between the world of titans and watching comrades die, there's plenty of reasons for soldiers to struggle with sleeping.
The problem is, at least tonight, the culprit isn’t insomnia.
It’s… something else.
Something that's lead your thoughts astray.
Maybe it's everything that happened with the Captain earlier, maybe it's the snowy setting that feels oddly romantic, maybe it's the cold that zapped your brain but... you keep on imagining what it’d be like to have Levi next to you, doing indescribable things to you. You imagine him turning on his pillow, taking his time to take in every line of your exposed skin. He’d unravel you with his gaze alone, you’re sure of it. Would he bestow the same intensity he reserves in training? Would his fingers hook around your limbs with the same ferocity? You think they might.
You think—
You groan, cutting your fantasies short. You and your damn fixation on Captain Levi—the one person who couldn’t possibly be less within your reach. This crush of yours must be a cruel joke from Maria, Rose, Sina… maybe all three of them combined.
More importantly, why is it all resurfacing now of all times? It's been fucking years that this one-sided crush of yours has been, just, there. In all this time, you've managed to reign in your emotions.
So why? Why won't your mind stop wandering into dangerous territories? Why can't you shut it down even now?
Whatever the reason may be, you need to find a solution to your... predicament. You suppose you could try to be quiet about it here, to bring yourself the release you desire, but you fear your Captain hearing you, given that he's sleeping in the room next to yours. You can’t imagine being caught in the act of pleasuring yourself.
No.
You need to find somewhere private.
Somewhere like…
Oh. 
The hot springs.
Of course—why didn’t you think about it before?
At once, you shuffle to a seated position in your bed, glancing out of the windows of the bedroom. The weather has cleared up by now, freckles of delicate white weaving through the air. Just beyond it, the hot spring awaits.
Serene. Lovely. Inviting.
Just the kind of spot you've been dreaming of.
Sure, your Captain wasn’t too keen on the smell, but you can wash afterwards.
Yes, this will have to do.
With your grand master-plan now laid out, you quickly spring into action. You gather your belongings: a towel, boots, an oil lamp.
In the main room, the remains of the fireplace are still dim and warm. Levi is occupying the second bedroom, and his door is closed shut—just as you’d hoped. It’s well past midnight, he must be asleep.
You grin to yourself. So far, your plan is a resounding success.
Outside, the air hangs still. The blizzard's fury has long passed, leaving only delicate snowflakes that twirl gracefully through the air. You pause to savor the newfound peace, taking in the picturesque landscape: rolling hills blanketed in pristine white, majestic forests embracing the mountain's gorges.
And the hot springs.
Nestled nearby, the cabin's springs stretch impressively, their shape narrow and serpentine rather than wide. Smooth rocks jut out over the water's edges, with pines and shrubs clinging to them. Together with the rising steam, they weave a misty veil that softens your view of the night.
Shedding your clothes, you quickly step in.
And oh... the initial touch of warm water is everything you'd hoped for and more. It sends a delightful trail of goosebumps trailing across your body.
The hot spring is shallow enough for ease, yet deep enough to envelop you comfortably as you sit. As you wade deeper, the water laps gently just above your chest, soothing the day’s weariness from your muscles. You let out a contented sigh, a particular knot in your spine coming undone.
This is the respite you've craved these past hours, especially after today's strenuous hike. It's a pity, really, that your Captain was so against the hot springs. This might have done him some good.
You venture further in with a smile plastered on your face. The clear waters mirror the starlit sky above, inviting you to explore every tranquil corner of this secluded paradise.
It isn't until you're midway across the hot spring, shoulders dipped beneath the water, that a sense of unease begins to gnaw at you.
Light.
Movement. 
Noise.
With the instincts of a trained Scout, you crouch into the water. Through the shrubs, you suddenly notice a pool of yellow light, too intense and artificial to be anything natural. Strange. It bears the distinct glow of the oil lamps used by the Survey Corps. More troubling still, there's a subtle sound of splashing water.
Your gaze flicks anxiously to where your clothes lie scattered, a distance away. You didn't bring a weapon with you. Should you attempt to go back?
Before you can think further on what to do next, your peripheral catches a glimpse of pale skin.
You freeze.
In the thickening steam, rising like delicate spirals into the chilly air, it’s hard to trust your eyes. This could easily be a hallucination.
But as the figure emerges, shoulders and back surfacing smoothly from the water, the reality sets in sharply.
It's him.
Captain Levi.
The man you’ve had a crush on for as long as you remember.
The man who you were just fantasizing about.
The man who’s currently naked a short distance away from you.
Oh.
Oh no.
This is bad.
Levi is clearly out for a swim. Apparently unaware of your presence, he pauses at the edge of the spring closest to a hill. He tilts his head back, hand brushing back wet hair. He looks up at the sky, oddly peaceful.
(The altitude is so high that it almost looks like your Captain could touch stars if he wanted to.)
But then your attention is drawn inexorably to the droplets cascading down his bare chest, and the full implications of your predicament crash over you.
Sure, water conceals Levi’s lower body, but his upper body leaves little left to the imagination. The curves of his shoulders, sloping down towards well-sculpted biceps. His chest, marked with scars and lines left by ODM use. His abs, well-defined and toned—a feat you know is only possible due to his diligent training ethic.
Already, warning bells ring in your brain.
What are you doing still standing here? By some miracle, Levi hasn’t noticed you. But with his perceptive senses, it won’t be long before he does.
And when that happens, you’re in trouble. Not only are you naked and gawking, but you also have no real reason to be here.
You could try to tell him you couldn't sleep. If anyone could understand, it might be Levi. The man rarely sleeps.
But you’re not entirely sure your Captain wouldn’t see right through your deception. He's sharp like that.
That can't happen. You can't admit to him the real reason you came out here: to touch yourself while thinking of him.
You need to leave. Now.
Which is why you carefully start to back away, eyes trained on him—praying he doesn't notice you.
Unfortunately, while you miraculously slipped past Levi’s attention the first time around, your luck has run out. His focus shifts, honed like a hawk zeroing in on its prey.
Then comes his voice, slicing through the quiet of the night. “Who’s there?”
The familiar timbre sends shivers down your spine and tightens the knot between your legs.
Panic sets in.
Desperate, you dive underwater, hoping to blend into the natural shroud provided by the spring.
But Levi isn’t called Humanity’s Strongest for nothing. With instincts sharper than a knife, you see the blurred outline of his pale body trudge through the water at an alarming speed.
Shit.
Shit.
Shit.
Levi’s voice rumbles through the water, but the meaning of his words are drowned by the elements. Your lungs burn as you begin to swim away, the mingling bubbles and steam clouding around you, the sulfuric scent of the spring sharp in your nostrils.
You pump every ounce of strength in your frantic escape.
Then a strong hand clamps around your arm, and you're dragged upwards.
“Oi!”
Instinctively, your hand lashes out, grabbing hold as your body is yanked forward. You gasp, air filling your lungs, the cold biting at your wet skin.
Your eyes round when you realize what your hand has landed on: one of Levi’s biceps.
You glance up, eyes locking with your Captain's surprised face.
A choked sound escapes you.
“What...” He says your first name, a frown settling between his militant brows. There's a lull in the conversation, like he doesn't quite believe what he's seeing, but his barking tone soon replaces it. “What the hell are you doing?”
Moments later, his lips press together in a taut line, and his biting grip tightens. He pushes back so that you're pressed against the edge of the hot spring, where he lets you go.
You land with a splash. 
At once, you attempt to cover yourself using your hands, dipping into the water so that you're almost entirely submerged. Levi looms over you, apparently not feeling discomfort from being naked before you. The water level arrives below his waist, and you can’t help but notice a trail of trimmed black hair that starts just above his navel.
You want to scream.
Your eyes fleet back up. His expression is inscrutable, but his eyes carry an intensity that you've only seen reserved for training sessions.
“You have five seconds to explain yourself,” Levi grumbles, magnetic and sharp. 
“I—” you begin, only to close your mouth again.
You… what? You can’t tell Levi the truth. You would rather drown than admit to your lewd intentions.
But you also have to say something. 
“—I didn’t realize you were in here,” you manage with some difficulty. 
There. That's not a lie, is it? You wouldn't dare to come in here if you knew your Captain would be around.
Unfortunately, your answer doesn’t seem to satisfy him.
“And why aren’t you asleep?” he asks.
You bite the inside of your cheek, watching the steam envelop Levi’s torso. “I couldn’t sleep, sir.”
“We’ve got a long hike ahead of us tomorrow. You can’t be dead weight because you wanted to go on a midnight stroll.”
You hate this… this feeling that you are letting him down. It’s everything you strive to avoid when it comes to your Captain. You’re proud to be in his squad and you pride yourself on being the best soldier you can be.
“That won't happen, sir. I can carry my weight.” You try to sound resolute, calm and collected. You fear you may be failing. “And Captain… I find it a bit odd that you're saying all of this to me.”
“What?”
Walls. You’re treading dangerous territories.
You clear your throat, waving a hand in the air. “Didn't you say the water was unhygienic? That it reeked? That we should both go to sleep?”
"Get to the point."
"I just assumed..." you mumble, chewing at the inside of your cheeks.
"Oh, I see." Something flashes in his eyes. Torture. "You hoped you could just do as you please, that the curfew rules didn't apply to you. Hate to break off your fantasies, soldier, but that's not going to happen. I'm here and you're caught."
"Well, you also need sleep, so..." you attempt, dipping your chin away from him and into the water. Levi's eyes narrow. You clear your throat. “I’m just speaking out of concern.”
“Then don’t concern yourself.”
You grimace. You're really not doing too well with all of this, are you?
You need to turn the tide, somehow. 
“I apologize, Captain. But I don’t think I’m in the wrong," you try to reason. "My track record speaks for itself: I’ve never faltered, even when running on fumes. You know I haven’t. I couldn’t sleep and this seemed like the best solution to reach that end. I wasn’t planning to stay here all night or to be a burden, sir; I just needed to clear my head before going to bed.”
You look at him again, trying to stand straighter for your words.
Levi's expression doesn't falter.
Then, he lets out a long exhale, half-turning away from you. “Look, I'm not your parent. Do as you please. But don’t come crying to me tomorrow if you're tired. You better be able to keep up. I expect nothing less of you.”
Your Captain must recognize that level-headed attitude he witnessed plenty of times out on expeditions, or he wouldn’t let you go down so easily.
Levi rubs his eyelids with the tips of his fingers. “And next time, pay better attention. There are all manners of perverts in this world. Even if this place seemed abandoned, you can never be too careful. It’s unlike you to be so careless.”
You chuckle nervously. If only Levi realized you’re the only degenerate lurking these waters.
“Right,” you answer. “Lucky it’s just you.”
As you say those words, Levi looks at you—really looks at you—and something shifts in his expression. His eyes move away from your face, casting his stern gaze over the rest of your body, as if seeing you for the first time.
His attention makes your breath stop.
“You should still be careful," he says in a low tone. "Men in the military are still men.”
You swallow loudly, a delicious sensation coiling at the bottom of your stomach. There’s something suggestive in Levi’s words, isn't there? You tell yourself that it’s just him showing his concern and that it means nothing beyond that.
“As I said, lucky it’s just you,” you repeat.
Then, Levi surprises you.
He takes a step forward, cornering you further to the edge of the spring. His stare glints like starlight.
Your heart leaps. What is he doing? Outside of training, Levi never approaches you like this.
You try to keep your cool at the sudden proximity. Knowing that just one peek down, and you’d see what lies between your Captain's legs. You briefly wonder what his cock looks like.
If it’s like the rest of him…
Stop.
You need to focus now—your Captain is speaking to you.
“And who’s saying I’m not the sort of man to take advantage of a situation like this one?”
Your breath hitches, unsure if you heard him correctly. His gray eyes linger on your bare shoulders, fixing it like his stare could pierce through them.
Is he... is he testing you?
Your eyes meet again. His pupils are dilated, yours are wide. 
“I know you,” you hear yourself say, “you’re not that type of man.”
For a moment, neither of you speak. Snow continues to dust the air, melting into the warm water surrounding you both. A faint gust of wind wheezes from down the mountain.
“You have that much faith in me, do you?” Levi asks quietly.
Your eyes flit back up. Levi has dipped further down into the water. He looks... pensive, eyes fixing his rippled reflection.
The sight of him so close almost takes the air out of your lungs.
And you’re reminded of how handsome your Captain is.
In all the years you’ve known him, all you could do was admire him from a distance—trying to keep your feelings and attraction for him in check. But Levi has always been beautiful, even when you denied yourself the opportunity to think so.
Deep-set eyes that remind you of muted skies—the occasional spark of blue shining when the sun hits his face just right. A velvety undercut that you know he trims himself every other week, the rest of his shiny hair parted in the middle. Rosy lips that appear permanently pressed together—only you’ve seen it: on the rare occasions that your Captain allows himself a downtime to drink a cup of tea with his squad and friends… yeah, the corners of his mouth twitch upwards, and the world is graced with one of Levi’s rare smiles. It’s a sight that you’ve kept locked in your heart.
“Yes,” you whisper, “I do.”
Levi's eyes come smoldering back onto you. “Speak up.”
“I would follow you to the ends of the earth, Captain Levi.”
It's true.
You first agreed to join Levi’s squad because you’d seen him fly, seen the way he handled his ODM gear. You grew to respect him like no one else. You stayed because of the sort of leader Levi proved to be. He didn’t demand authority like the rest, but he exuded it all the same. He didn’t care to be Humanity’s Strongest, but he still garnered hope and made people believe in him.
“I mean it,” you add, “I’m devoted to you.”
Levi's face pinches. “Careful with your words. I don’t like thoughtless sheep.”
“That’s not what I mean. You know I’m not scared to question your orders if I disagree with them. I’m smart and I’m strong. But even so, you’re the person I followed when I joined the Scouts. I would do anything for you.”
His eyes do not blink. “Anything.”
“Anything.”
Levi swallows heavily, taking a step back.
“Don’t say shit like that," he mutters. "Anything is everything. Other people would abuse your willingness. You should be careful.”
A moment passes by. You lick your lips, already moistened by the fog. Suddenly, you recall the actual reason for being here. You’re hot, burning. Like if you don’t get the release you desire, you might just need to cool off in the snow somewhere.
It might be why you dare to say your next words.
“Do you want to abuse my willingness?” you ask.
Levi’s stare darts back to you. Before you can control it, you squeeze your thighs tightly together, finding the tension unbearable. Levi takes notice: his eyes burn up and down, mouth parted.
It's maybe Levi's stupor that makes you act next. You push yourself up on the balls of your feet, rising with an arm draped over your breasts. The water provides a somewhat decent cover over what lies below your waist, but it does nothing to stop runlets plowing down your exposed curves.
Levi’s goes still. 
And you push through. 
“I lied, Captain Levi,” you tell him. 
His brows knit together.
“The truth is, I came out here because," you avert your gaze, "… because I needed relief.”
“Relief.”
“Yes, relief in the…," your cheeks grow warm, "physical sense, I mean.”
“You mean masturbation.”
“You’re putting it rather plainly, but sure,” you mumble. “I.. I’d still like that relief, sir.”
“Look, whatever depravity you’re up to does not concern—”
“With you. I'd like for it to be with you.”
Everything goes still after that.
Levi’s entire face is blank, as if he sucked in all his emotions. All you can hear is the light gust of wind, swallowed by the mountains.
“What..." Levi opens his mouth, then closes it shut again as if he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing. The knot in his throat bobs in what you can only describe as the most painful seconds of your life. You swear your heartbeat must be loud enough for him to hear. "What you're suggesting. You realize that it’s against the rules.”
“I realize, sir,” you say.
“That I’m your Captain and you’re my subordinate?”
Dread settles at the bottom of your stomach. Yikes, you’re in for one of his lectures, aren’t you?
“Yes, Captain Levi.”
“That both of us could get in trouble if this gets out?”
... What?
Your eyes flit up.
Did you hear him correctly?
Levi assesses you. He takes a step forward and you shrivel back as he plants his arms on either side of your body, caging you in. He dips down into the water to come eye-level with you.
“Tell me,” he murmurs, stare never straying from yours.
You blink. Is your Captain seeking to understand your desires?
"S-sir?” you stutter.
“Tell me what you want, if you could have it,” he says.
Oh shit, he is. Your Captain is actually trying to understand what you want.
“Oh, um," you fumble with your words, heartbeat climbing up to your throat. Truthfully, you never expected to make it this far, so you feel unprepared. "Well, in my fantasies, my partner would… touch me, sir.”
“Where?”
“Everywhere. But I suppose it begins with a… kiss.”
Levi’s eyes flicker to your lips.
Oh, fuck.
"Show me." 
Your eyes widen. "S-show you?"
"That's what I just said."
Now, normally, you'd be the type to overthink and overanalyze just about everything. So when your Captain says those words, beckons you closer, you stop thinking.
You do as he asks and you kiss him.
And you discover that his mouth is soft, like velvet on skin.
Then Levi leans into you—moving his lips over yours, cupping your cheeks with more vigor—and you realize that it’s truly happening. Your hands fall onto his chest bone and his heartbeat sparks under your fingertips. It's his heart. The heart he dedicated to the Survey Corps—it's yours, if only for a brief moment.
And reality crashes on you.
You’re kissing Levi Ackerman. Your Captain. Humanity's Strongest.
Holy shit.
Not wanting to waste this fleeting opportunity (because surely, this can't last), you slide your tongue further into the depths of his mouth. Levi lets out a hum of approval, and you taste him—taste the chamomile he drinks most evenings and the mint from his toothpaste.
When your eyes venture open, you find that your Captain’s steely gaze is already fixed on you, watching you through a half-lidded stare. You can see the clear blue ring around his silver irises. 
It only makes you want him more.
"C-captain," you say through the kiss. 
Levi breaks apart briefly. “Tell me.”
You take his hand and guide it to your chest.
“T-touch me here. Please.”
Levi acquiesces, gripping the bud of your nipple between two fingers and pinching, hard.
Pleasure ripples through your body, making you whimper in place.
At that moment, you can only imagine what you look like—flushed, pliant and pleading for more. You’ve never shown this side of yourself to him before; you wonder if it repulses him.
Wrong, utterly wrong. The opposite seems to be true, in fact; your Captain seems to delight himself with this facet you are revealing.
“Desperate, are we?” he murmurs into the shell of your ear, tone dripping with a husky sense of satisfaction.
Before you can answer to his teasing, his mouth moves over your neck, while his hands continue to caress your breasts. The contrast of temperatures is so stark—the hot spring so warm, his skin so cold—that it makes you audibly gasp.
Your hands slide up towards his nape, and you brush the brittle undercut and twist, tugging him closer.
That’s when you feel it… the hardness—his hardness, pressing against your plump flesh.
At the contact, the Captain groans against your throat, biting down without restraint. You whimper, attempting to push back, but Levi's teeth don't let go.
"Quit squirming," he mutters.
Your warm breath clouds the air. “C-captain, please.”
“Mm?”
"Please touch me. I can’t bear to wait anymore.”
In response, Levi slides his free hand to tug at your hair. He pulls on your locks, exposing the side of your neck for him to ravish, nibbling from the tip of your ear to your collarbone.
“Don't you know that all good things come to those who wait?” he says. 
Vindictive that your Captain is depriving you of what you’ve asked, you decide to give him a taste of his own medicine. You roll your hips forward, grinding against him, a fleeting attempt to make him just as desperate at you are.
Levi hisses as your soft curves plow against his erection. “You little minx.”
He pulls you back to shoot you a glare. Dangerous move, his eyes convey. And yet, it also gives you a glimpse into his state and, oh... interesting. You aren’t the only one who’s flustered, you realize—rosiness dusts his cheeks and his pupils are wide-shot black.
Your lips quirk into a playful smile.
Levi shrugs with one arm, looking away. “Be patient, will you?” His voice is hoarse. “I’m not someone who does things half-way.”
You roll your eyes. “Uh-huh. Believe me, I’ve noticed.”
Levi lets out a grunt that’s so decidedly him.
Suddenly, Levi completely lets go and your body drops into the water. You frown. One of Levi's lids twitches.
“What are you doing?” you ask.
“Teaching you some patience. Wait here and stay put."
"But, you said—“
“—that's an order.”
You close your mouth, shivering at the commanding tone in his voice. You aren't sure how you'll be able to go back from this after tonight—listening to his orders on the battlefield is going to be a nightmare.
Nonetheless, you do as he says, watching as he swims offshore where the oil lamp is placed.
And the whole situation hits you like bricks.
Holy shit.
You just kissed Captain Levi. And you're about to do more with him.
Why exactly is it happening now, of all times, you wonder? Why is your Captain allowing this?
In all the years you’ve been working alongside the Captain, you always thought your crush had gone unnoticed, or if Levi knew, that he had ignored it altogether.
Your observations are cut short as Levi comes back, holding up his towel and his green cloak above the water's surface.
You raise a questioning brow.
“I’m not touching you in this water, natural spring or not.” Your Captain unfolds the towel as he places it neatly over the smooth edge of the hot spring that's snow-free, casting the cloak behind. He shifts his blank stare on you, and taps on the ground with one hand. “Sit.”
You gulp, self-conscious at the idea of exposing yourself like this. Sure, it’s nighttime, and sure, the steam obscures the air, but he’s demanding a level of vulnerability that you hardly give out.
Levi picks up on your hesitation in a flash of a moment, reading you like a book. “You can still back away from this, you know.”
“I… no. No, I want this.” And you do—the way your core pulsates even now should be a telltale sign of just how much you want this. “I really want this.”
“Then what? You’re never uncertain during expeditions.”
“That’s because I know my shit out there. It’s not that easy with you. This is scary.”
Levi scoffs. “You think I’m scarier than a titan?”
“Of course not. But I overthink.”
Levi traps your chin between two fingers, tilting your head so you’re forced to look at him. “Then don’t think.” 
You falter, mouth parting. Levi skims a thumb over your lower lip. The sudden gentleness behind his words, combined with his actions, makes you falter.
“Okay,” you find yourself whispering back.
“Okay, what?”
You meet his stare head-on. His eyes are no longer a muted silver, but turning towards a stormy gray. They demand an answer.
And you have just the thing to give him.
“Please help me not to think, Captain.”
Levi lets out a long hum as he slides closer. There, he takes the time to kiss your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, your neck, all the while his hands create a path down your body, exploring for the first time.
“Is that what you want?” he asks in a low tone. “For me to help you stop thinking?”
“Y-yes." You swallow loudly. "You have complete control. Do whatever you want to me, just... get me there.”
In one movement, Levi plucks you off the ground, his hands gripping your ass as if you weighed nothing at all. You squirm in his grip, clutching his back for support as your wet flesh slides against his own. He then carefully places you onto the towel so that you're sitting on the edge of the hot spring, your calves dipping into the water. The rocks under you are smooth, and you now tower over him.
Levi takes a step back to admire you, his eyes roving over every facet of your body, tracing your curves with meticulous care.
It makes you squirm in place. “Captain…”
“Levi,” he answers without missing a beat, engrossed in admiring your body. He parts your legs as he anchors himself in between them, where he draws circles along your rib cage, thumb slotting along every dip.
“Huh?”
His silver eyes look up to you, a fire in them that wasn’t there before.
“We’re not here as soldiers, so. Just call me Levi,” he says.
One hand nestles along the flesh of your waist while you tremble in his arms. Levi angles your head sideways with his other palm, siphoning your neck with kisses before finding a sensitive spot that makes you gasp.
“Alright… ah, Levi,” you say with some difficulty. It feels strange to call your Captain so informally, but there’s something arousing about it too.
"And if I do anything that displeases you or that feels too much, just so."
"Say what?"
He pulls back for a moment. "I don't know, pick something."
"Anything?"
He nods.
You think about it for a moment when the idea hits you. "Okay... Green, red. Formation colors."
Levi scoffs. "Titan formations."
"You said to pick, so I picked. Still a soldier through and through, right?"
"Whatever you say."
Levi’s hand trails to your chest, moving to cup one of your breasts between his nimble digits. His thumbs toy with it while his tongue finds its place along the valley of your second breast.
His hot breath drifts against the tip of your hardened tit, “I'm gonna go down on you.”
Before you can answer, Levi flicks the bud of your nipples with his teeth, swirling his tongue in circles that sparks pleasure everywhere—leaving you to moan and hold onto his set of hair.
Your words tumble mid-breath. “Are you s-sure?”
Levi’s stare lock with yours, his lips still sealed to your breast. He pulls away with a pop, a thread of saliva connecting between his mouth and your nipple.
The sight makes you want to scream.
“Have I ever said anything I didn’t mean?” he asks.
A shiver runs down your spine.
“No… I guess not. I… fuck, okay, yes. Go down on me, Levi. Green, so fucking green.”
Levi takes a step back, using your name to usher you into execution. “On your back, then, and put my cloak on. You’re not catching a fucking cold from this.”
I don’t think I’ll be getting cold with what's ahead, you think to yourself. 
Nonetheless, you comply with his orders. You slide his cloak over your shoulders and prop your elbows down. Before you can blink, Levi pulls you towards him by the grip of your thighs, causing your back to lie flush with the ground. You glance at him, bewildered.
Levi has wrapped his hands around the meat of your legs, parting them to have full access. There's a wild glint to his eyes, like what you have between your legs is making him lose himself. Before you can blink, Levi begins to heed kisses on the inner parts of your legs, his touch slow and treacherous. It makes your hips buck, twitching beneath him.
“Sensitive, are we?” Levi tuts, his warm breath tickling your skin.
Any clever answer you might have given him is snuffed out as his warm breath falls on your sex. His hot tongue dips into your folds, something almost wicked in the way he rams in. You jerk up, calves sliding out of the water to wrap themselves around his neck.
You shoot up to grab a fistful of his hair.
But Levi stops you in your tracks. He pulls back, gathering your wrists in one hand. “Stay put. You can look but you can’t touch.”
And with that, he flings your wrists to your stomach, clinging onto you as his other hand pins one leg down. Then, he relishes in the wetness between your legs, slowing down in a manner that’s oh so sensual.
That wicked little man.
“Captain,” you complain, trembling beneath his touch. You can’t take it anymore—not being able to move, being held down as he unravels you, and now he teases you with his tongue?
It’s too much and at the same, it's not enough.
In response, Levi doubles down on his efforts.
“S-s-shit,” you breathe out, your mind going into overdrive from being pinned like this. 
You knew of Levi’s strength, of course. Everyone within the Walls knows about Humanity’s Strongest. You’ve even had the privilege to witness it firsthand on expeditions.
But seeing it used in his lovemaking, well… it's something else entirely.
“You fucking tease. You're doing it on purpose, aren't you?” you mutter. 
His voice hums against your sex. “And what if I am?”
That’s when Levi hits your spot, tenderly sucking on your clit in a way that makes you heave. This time, you can’t help but release a louder moan, hips arching up to meet his lips.
But just as you're about to reach that bliss you've craved all along, Levi pulls away.
You're left cold. Aching.
You tilt your head to gape at him. Levi’s mouth glistens with your slickness, but it does nothing to quell down your frustration.
What the hell is he doing?
You’re about to mouth him off when his expression shifts, stormy eyes narrowing.
“Patience,” he grits out.
It’s painful, the way he just delayed your orgasm. In the absence of his touch, your core throbs, begging for some kind of release.
So despite him being your superior, you can’t help but let out disgruntled words, “I don’t like being delayed, sir.”
Levi scoffs as his hands travel back onto your dampened skin. “I always knew you’d get bossy in bed.”
Your brows raise, wondering if you heard him correctly. Does this mean your Captain has thought about you… in bed?
Before you can ask, Levi moves on, dipping back into the task at hand. He shoves your legs apart, pinning you in place with an iron grip. His other hand trails over your damp inner thigh, positioning one finger at the entrance of your vagina, a digit sliding in. You feel your walls clench around his finger, pleasure ebbing through you as he discovers that magic spot that makes your toes curl.
“Perfect fucking cunt,” Levi slurs against you, cheek pressed against your shaking leg as he glides his deft finger with steady movements, mouth nuzzling closer to your silky clit.
You whimper at his praises, hips bulking up to chase his tongue. You try to keep quiet, but the more your Captain learns where to hit your points of pleasure, the more you think you may not maintain this charade for very long.
You realize that the way he delayed your orgasm has made the buildup now so much more intense. Your muscles tense, like a spring about to let loose.
So the relief that comes from Levi’s mouth wrapping against your clit again brings tears in your eyes. Pleasure seeps in. You try to grind against him to chase it even faster, but Levi remains unwilling to allow you to assert your dominance here—he keeps you pinned, keeping complete control, like he said he would.
More—you need more.
“Please, Captain. Please, please, please.”
In response, Levi doubles down on his efforts. It's as if all he needed was to hear you plead to give you exactly what you want. His digit rams into you, the pad of his thumb moving to tease you while his tongue flicks your clit with increased fervency.
Your heart drums quicker than a horse’s canter.
“… shit, shit, shit,” you choke.
When you open your eyes again, you find that Levi’s face is locked on you already—his compact muscles tense, his usual steel-eyes now a smoky haze. If only you knew what this is doing to him. His mouth seals on your bundle of nerves with a groan, his digit curling to rub your g-spot, thrusting with well-timed movements.
And then, he hits the point you were begging to be touched all along, groaning into your folds…
Right.
There.
The coil splits and your climax flares.
Your mouth opens to release a silent scream, skull rolling back as tiny warm tingles swim through your body.
Holy hell.
Levi stays with you through the orgasm, riding the bliss with you. He takes in the sight of you coming undone for him—learning from it, committing it in his memory.
Legs shaking, you don’t even register Levi tending to you as you come down. He licks your wetness pulsating in his mouth, enraptured in the taste of it as he takes it all in. With meticulous dexterity, he slides his coated fingers into his mouth, watching you as he goes about it.
“Oh, f-fuck,” you stutter out.
In response, Levi only continues to pepper kisses over your trembling legs. A madman, you think.
After a moment, Levi’s touch slides away. The sound of water sloshing as he pushes himself out of the hot spring.
Your head lulls sideways to admire him.
Levi’s neck is flushed—whether from the stream or from going down on you, it’s hard to tell—but it’s about the most bewitching sight you’ve ever seen. He sinks to his knees, like a religious man kneels before the Three Goddesses, and your breath falters as you catch sight of his erection.
He’s hard, tip flushed red. A trail of black hair paves down from his navel to his erection, while the rest of his body glistens under the moonlight. Sinewy muscles and tendons, locked together—years of relentless training and surviving on display.
The sight of it makes it impossible to think.
“Captain Levi,” you say with some urgency.
“Mm?”
“I’m gonna need you inside me. Now.”
“Are you ordering me around?” There's slight derision in his voice, twisting your insides.
“Yes,” you lick your lip, eyes locking with his, “that’s right, I’m ordering you.”
Levi huffs, forearms flexing as he crawls towards you—slowly, like a predator does its prey. With his body still warm from the hot spring, it creates a fog around him, his pale skin gleaming like gossamer.
Levi's voice remains steady, eyes impassive, but there's a hint of something in his eyes that tells you he enjoys being spoken back to.
“Someone thinks highly of herself, ordering her Captain around,” he chastises.
“Said Captain has yet to say no.”
“And why would I refuse you?”
At that, your Captain captures your lips. Your savor the way his body molds into yours, tasting your muskiness on his tongue. A wonderful sensation overwhelms you then—knowing you allowed your body to succumb to his touches, knowing he wanted to taste you in this manner.
As he breaks away the kiss, you can't help but continue to ask for more. 
“Sir…”
Levi tugs at your waist, sliding you back down with force. “What did I say about calling me by my name?”
He looms over you, his bangs dusting his face. Your lips twitch into a coy smile, sliding your fingers into his slick hair. It's so soft.
“And what if I want to call you by your title?” you ask.
“Oh, is that how it is?” Despite the neutral tone in his voice, there’s something dark in his stare, heightened by pink cheeks and red ears. He strokes the ball of your shoulder with his thumb. “You’re one of those people who gets off on authority, huh?”
You grip his arms, turning your head away. Levi rubs his cock over your clit, teasing you and spreading your wetness. You mewl.
“You're lucky I'm feeling generous,” Levi says in your ear. “You better use it well."
Your breath catches in your chest as the tip of his length enters you. His warm hands skim over the flesh of your body, letting you slowly adjust to him, cradling you.
“That will all depend on you, Captain Levi,” you manage to pant out, letting the l sound roll of your tongue.
He grates out your name. “So fucking mouthy.”
“Well, I learned from the best, sir.”
Levi’s stare locks onto you, gazing at you like he was in a trance. His Adam's apple bobs. He almost looks vulnerable for a split moment.
“You've watched me, have you?” he says in a low tone.
Your cheeks warm at the suggestion in Levi’s words, mouth parting to contest when you feel his forefinger run along your lower lash line. Your eyes meet his piercing gaze.
He leans close, mouth hovering close to yours.
“I've watched you too,” he confesses.
And then, Levi slams into you.
Your cry mixes in with Levi's groan. Reaching blindly for something to hold on to, wanting—needing—him to understand just what he’s doing to you, you settle on clawing at his back. Levi’s thrusts are treacherous—painfully slow at first, pounding with full intensity.
The way of a man trying to ruin you.
“Holy s-shit,” you breathe, puffs of white clouding the air.
Levi holds you close as his hips roll forward to settle on a cadence that matches your vices, his flushed cheeks pressing against yours. You hook your fingers, grinding into his touch—your mind edging towards complete absolution.
“F-fuck,” he mutters, voice decadent. "You're so. Perfect.”
His words cause something delicious to swirl within you.
Levi slings an arm around your back, the other hooking up one knee to position himself deeper, slipping out and back into your wanting heat. You watch as his lips press together like he were trying to contain back a moan, but it’s obscured by your vision blurring at the sensation of his length stretching you out.
With one traitorous jerk, your walls throb in pleasure, eyes brimming with tears as you stare at Levi’s pale skin and the snow mingling together. Your nails scratch his hips, leaving red marks on his soft, plush skin.
“Levi,” you plead.
Levi, what? You aren’t sure what you’re calling out to him for. You’re too forgone, too dizzy, to notice you used his first name, let alone find the words to finish that thought.
His back muscles go taut under your fingertips, his spine moving in accordion with the rolling of his hips.
More.
More.
More.
“Captain, please, please—.”
“Be patient,” he grits out. His tousled hair clings over his forehead, lips parting as your bodies merge into one. “Fuck, I’m gonna—”
Suddenly, he pulls out of you and flips you over so that you’re on all four. He angles your waist up, one hand pinning your neck down, the other holding onto your hair, as he slides back in..
Then Levi moves down on you and bites your right shoulder—hard. Pleasures ripples through your body, feeling his mark on your skin.
"Color?" he asks, voice shaking.
"Ngh... green, so fucking green." You whimper, nails scratching at the soil. “Do it again."
And Levi only delivers, his bite turning to something strong enough to bruise as he thrusts into you.
You wonder what Levi looks like up there, gripping at your waist while the rest of your body curves face down. You wish you could frame a picture for yourself to stow away.
If you could see your Captain, you’d see that his eyes are trained on the sight of your naked body glistening with sweat. You’d catch him fixing his cock getting lost inside of you, your walls clamping around him. You’d see the way his eyes marvel at your curves—how your body blends with valleys of snow over the horizon. You'd see the blush spreading from his neck to his ears, burning the way you are.
A state of euphoria.
“F-f-fuck. I can't get enough of you,” you hear him confess.
Can’t get enough of you? Are you hearing him correctly? Since when does your Captain speak like that?
Still, his words seem to ignite something inside you, emboldened to see more of this side your Captain is revealing.
“Tell me,” you murmur, pleasuring building and building.
His answer doesn’t miss a beat, straightening up to pound into you harder. “You drive me crazy.”
Levi’s fingers dig into your flesh, something needy, something bruising, about his grip.
“Yeah? Then let me let you in on something, Levi… Captain, ah,” you mutter, eyes fluttering as he continues to fill you up. “The reason I came out here in the first place was because… ngh, I wanted to imagine your fingers touching me. Wanted to imagine it was you fingering me.”
“F-fuck,” Levi hisses.
He grips your hips with full-blooded vigor, siphoning into you with a quickened pace.
“Captain, I—”
But your words die out when three fingers find a place on your swollen clit. Your brain short-circuits.
Your orgasm splinters into the night.
You go boneless, sagging into pure bliss, while Levi continues to thrust into you. Feeling your walls clench so tightly, creaming his length, he follows soon after—the rushing heat of his climax answers your own, his pulsing cock engulfed by your heat.
And your brain? Your brain is numb.
For a moment, all the two of you can do is pant and attempt to regain your senses. One of Levi’s hand rests on the small of your back, while you slowly uncurl your fingers from the ground.
Eventually, Levi slides out of you. He uses the towel to help you clean up. You watch him go about it, mind still delirious, something almost coy about the way he handles the aftercare of your lovemaking.
When all is said and done, a comfortable silence fills the air.
It’s now well past twilight, and both of you only have a precious few hours before you’re back on the road.
Neither of you are particularly tired. You let your sore body slide back into the warm water with your Captain by your side. You watch the mountains slope down, elbows perked on the edge of the hot spring, basking in the utter peace that comes from this sort of silence.
You lean a cheek on your propped hand to watch him. A light breeze tousles Levi’s black hair, faint snow dusting the air. You count the scars twined on his torso, wondering about the story behind each one.
Maybe one day, your Captain might open up about each of them.
"Did it work?" Levi interrupts the trembling silence, watching as you draw circles over the smooth edge of the hot spring.
Your eyes circle around to meet his cloudy stare.
You raise a brow. "Did what work?"
"Did you stop thinking?"
You snort, recalling your pleading request. "Yeah. I stopped thinking. And... thank you, by the way."
Levi hums. There's another lull in the conversation, filled with comfortable silence.
“I guess I don’t need to tell you that this should remain between us,” he says.
That makes you roll your eyes. “Aw, you wound me, Captain. Here I was hoping to gossip with everyone about the way you like to eat people out.”
Levi shoots you an unimpressed look.
“I’m not stupid, Levi,” you add.
Levi clicks his tongue. “No, just too fucking ballsy. Never knew your mouth ran so wild.”
You smirk. “Well, sorry to say, sir, but you’ve not seen half of what my mouth can do.”
You swear a a rosy hue dusts the ridge of his nose. “You're a shameless thing, you know that?”
You laugh, tilting your head sideways. “I told you. I know what I want.”
“Clearly,” he remarks, eying you. “And you’ve wanted this for a while.”
Despite having just had his face buried between your legs, you can’t help but feel a little embarrassed at that comment and the confession it demands of you.
“Never said that,” you dismiss.
“No? What were your exact words? That you—”
“Don’t repeat what I said!” you hiss, glaring at him. “It was in the heat of the moment. You can’t hold it against me.”
Levi grunts in an amused way, a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. You watch him through half-lidded eyes, unsure how he might use this knowledge. You didn't think about any of it before, but where do you go from here?
Levi gives you that answer seconds later. He raises a hand to your face, tugging a strand behind your ear and swirling his thumb over your jaw.
“Well, next time you dream of my fingers, just come to me,” he says simply.
There’s an intensity in his gray eyes that wasn’t there before.
You go still.
Next time?
Is that a promise?
His thumb presses over your neck, feeling you gulp against his fingertip. Your stomach contracts in anticipation.
Oh, it is a promise.
You could get used to this new side of your Captain.
And then Levi retreats, eyes never wavering from yours, and bobs his head towards the chalet.
“Now to the shower, we’re not reeking come morning.”
“But—”
“That’s an order, soldier.”
You sigh.
There’s the Captain you’ve grown to like so much.
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— Masterlist / Join my taglist / Spotify Playlist that inspired this fic Heart divider by saradika-graphics - the rest is by me ~
Taglist: @l3visthighs, @bejewelledd, @nube55, @thephantomtheory, @levilxvr, @halloweenmedic, @notgoodforlife, @sixpennydame, @youre-ackermine, @starrylevi, @loyal2rin, @levistealeaf, @queen0sharena, @levisecretgfblog, @bitchymanlet
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Hello amazing mod team! I was wondering if you know of any fics involving Crowley taking care of an injured/sick/Fallen Aziraphale, or vice versa? The fluffier the better. I also typically don't read AUs. Thank you all so much for what you do here. Much love!
Hi! You can check our #sick fic, #hurt aziraphale, #hurt crowley, and #fallen angel aziraphale tags for more fics like this. Here are more fluffy hurt and sick Aziraphale fics to add...
Unsteady Breaths by Elijahsworld (NR)
Happily unboxing his new collection of books, the thought that anything he would receive could be harmful to his angelic being never crossed his mind. Or Aziraphale falls ill but Crowley's there to comfort him through these rough times.
Made it out of our cages, never made it back home by ethewinter (NR)
"We were a team," said Crowley. "And a damn good one at that. I never... Out of all of the people who could've betrayed me, angel, I never would have thought it would be you. Not in a thousand lifetimes. You want to know why I'm still hurt?" Crowley straightened and looked directly into Aziraphale's eyes. His yellow eyes were filled with tears. "I never would've done this to you. Never. I don't fucking care what you think, we're an us. We've always been an us. You running off to play archangel doesn't make that different." - Aziraphale's promotion to supreme archangel doesn't work out. Crowley's left to pick up the pieces.
so I’ll take care of you (and honey, you’ll take care of me too) by sugardustedtulips (T)
“Angels don’t sneeze,” Crowley began, letting a few seconds of silence fill the atmosphere. “Wait, do they?” “I don’t know, dear. But, not to worry, I’ll be all tickety-boo in no time. It’s just the weather, you see, icy all around,” Aziraphale remarked, his tone a smidge too polite and formal for the situation. “My corporation’s merely responding to the changes-“ He had begun, before another sneeze so rudely punctuated his sentence. The muffled mucus-filled sniffles were loud enough to be transmitted to the other end of the phone, the worry in the demon’s chest rising, pounding on his ribs. “‘m coming over,” Crowley said matter-of-factly, hoping Aziraphale couldn’t somehow sense that both his legs are anxiously bouncing at breakneck speed.
Unwilling to waste miracles on himself, Aziraphale can’t miracle himself better after catching a cold. Luckily, a certain lovesick demon is there to take care of him. A sickening amount of fluff ensues (and many feelings are realised).
at the edge of the water by viperinz (G)
“Hello, dearest. Do you mind miracling a cold pack for me? I’m afraid I can’t focus enough to do it.” Crowley swallows, his eyes wide. He does what he’s asked to do, because of course he doesn’t mind. He doesn’t mind at all. He walks to the side Aziraphale is facing, sitting down on the edge of the bed. He hands the cold pack to Aziraphale, who gratefully takes it. “Thank you,” he whispers, and Crowley watches as he puts the pack on his right thigh. Aziraphale sighs in relief, but his face still conveys how much pain he still feels. And, Crowley gets it now. The pain that needed a cold pack, the way that Aziraphale was limping. It was an injury, wasn’t it?
Crowley notices that there's something going on with Aziraphale's leg. He realizes the pain lies deeper than he first thought it would.
Eye for an Eye by Greenathena (T)
A year before the Apocalypse, Aziraphale is suddenly struck blind, losing both his corporeal and ethereal vision. To make matters worse, he's just discovered that Heaven may have some new technology to hasten the end of the world.
so grey the face of every mortal by philadelea (T)
"Now, some 6,000 years, several historical rescues, and one half-Apocalypse later, that promise tasted like ash in Crowley’s mouth. " It's been six months since Armaggeddidn't. Aziraphale has been in Hell for the last three weeks. Crowley is there to pick up the pieces.
- Mod D
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neversetyoufree · 3 days
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I started vnc way back when there was only one volume, stopped, and only restarted it last week 🙈 since then, I have reread it twice and will again, once I'm done with exams, as it has turned me insane. And since no one I know reads it, I just wanted to ask what your thoughts are on my theory that the reason not 'didn't reach out to vanitas' thus leading to his death is because of Ruthven compulsion on him? Cuzco after the 'ill never set you free'thing, I just can't see noel not reaching out tonight purpose. Your blog is a joy to read through, and I love your meta!
Hello!! Thank you so much! It's always great to see another person having fun with my favorite manga :D.
My thoughts on Vanitas's eventual death are. complicated. If we keep going down the path we're on now, I honestly suspect Vanitas's death is going to be more assisted suicide than murder. IE, Vanitas asks for Noé to kill him because it's preferable to the alternative.
Per Ruthven's compulsion, I definitely think it's going to come up, and I do like the idea of Ruthven trying to force Noé to hurt or kill Vanitas, but I don't think it's going to be how Vanitas dies. In a way, I think that would feel somewhat cheap.
Noé killing Vanitas because of his oath to Ruthven would make sense on a plot level. It's a nice, logical explanation for why Noé would kill someone he so clearly adores. I can see why it's a lot of people's theory! However, that explanation wouldn't really deliver on an emotional level. It's just not interesting for Noé's characterization.
For one thing, making Noé kill Vanitas when he's not in control of himself would strip away all of Noé's agency. With VnC's opening chapter, Mochijun sets us up so that the entire time we're reading, we're asking ourselves "but why will Noé kill him?" It's a big source of intrigue and suspense. And to me, finally resolving that suspense with "It's not his fault! He was artificially forced to!" feels like a major letdown. It adds nothing to Noé's character. It's answering that all-important "why" with "There is no reason why. He didn't actually want to." I think that would be a cop-out.
Through that denial of agency, I think this ending would also risk losing out on a lot of potential character development for Noé. The core of Noé and Louis's tragedy is that Noé desperately wanted to save Louis, but the only kind of salvation Louis wanted from him was death, and Noé couldn't give him that.
Now Noé has another person close to him that is also seeking salvation through death. If Noé kills Vanitas, but he's not in control of himself when he does, that misses out on a big opportunity. Has Noé come to understand salvation through death? Has his worldview changed since Louis made that request of him? Does he have it in him to kill a loved one if that's what they ask? If Vanitas's death is forced by Ruthven, then we're much less likely to get answers to those questions.
Personally, my favorite hope/theory for how Ruthven's order will play out is the idea that Ruthven will order Noé to hurt/stop/kill Vanitas, but Vanitas will manage to snap Noé out of it in the same way Noé broke Vanitas's self-hypnosis in the amusement park. There's nothing I love more than a gay little parallel.
I can see a scenario where Ruthven's oath is what pushes Vanitas close to death? Maybe Noé will be ordered to try to kill Vanitas, and that will set off whatever horrible chain of events pushes Vanitas to ask for death that final time. But even if Ruthven does order Noé to hurt Vanitas (which is a big if), I don't think it will be what causes the killing blow.
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thecartoonrambler · 3 days
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Why Wander is such an important character
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Very long post below!
Ill be rambling about Wander over Yonder, specifically, WANDER!!
The show in itself is already amazing, the episodes are short and fun, each character is oozing with personality and fun interactions and there are always ways in which it is all connected. Further on the animation of the show and overall look is absolutely adorable!
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For me personally, Wander is simply such an important character and not for few reasons.
I love that Wander's silly happy go lucky personality is so addictive. He's a happy person, who gets happy by helping others in need, even to points where he gets himself in trouble (every episode LOL) But regardless i think they are such an important character traits to have (Happiness, altruism, Optimism).
In today's depressing and violent world, where everyone just fights with each other, a character like Wander can be a sense of hope or inspiration!
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Of course, many main characters have these traits as well, but i think a key difference between Wander and many other optimist protagonists lies in their EXPERIENCE IN LIFE!
These other protags are innocent, naive optimists, because they haven't experienced "the real world" yet. And while it makes sense to have characters like these (as an allegory to growing up), they get really tiring and repetitive really quickly. They also commonly showcase optimism and naivety to go hand in hand. And its why a lot if people commonly believe that "realsim" is inherently "pessimistic" (it isn't btw. Theres good and bad in life, denying theres good, is denying reality)
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Its extremely refreshing to have a main character like Wander, actually be hinted at being millennias old, repeatedly converting villains to good throughout the eons, out of a sense of duty (and perhaps also Pacifist revenge for his childhood, where its hinted that his entire planet was destroyed and he was the only survivor.)
not only is this also something that one learns, the more one watches (keeping the viewer intrigued) but the fact that so much about Wander's life and past is a mystery is what makes him a fascinating character. At first glance hes just some helpful guy, and the more you learn about him, the more you more you think "who is this guy?" Not in a negative way, but in a complete curiosity. Is it possible he's as old as the universe himself? If so does he know it? Who is he? What actually happened in his past? How did he live before his hat? Was there a time he wasn't as helpful? What caused him to change? Who is he? But at the same time, the viewer doesn't NEED to know. Theres no stress to, no hurry to uncover a mystery. Its like "mystery but it's actually completely low-key". I like that. (Im the kind to get into conspiracy theories or get crazy over plot holes, so the show managing this is insane)
Traits like these, especially in contrast to their personality being so so happy, child-like, goofy, charitable, it makes for an extremely interesting and fascinating character, that one doesn't commonly see in media! Which is really awesome! Someone that's seen so much horrors, lived through civil wars, yet tries to help a skeleton get together with a butch lesbian??
Its awesome!
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Other that just that alone, he's helped me out personally! He in many ways reminds me of myself as a kid, i too was altruistic, always trying to help, struggled to say no, was positive and happy go-lucky and adventurous (well, as all kids i suppose), recently rediscovering the show made me realise how much i missed those personality traits in myself. That i had hidden them away, due to people making fun of me of being "too naive" and "too childish". Eventually Making me not talk to people really, and develop really bad self esteem. Rediscovering this show, and specifically how these "childish" traits can be seen in a very positive charming light, helped me realise that being scared of "coming off wierd", "coming off as toxic positivity" will always be worse than not being positive.... At all.
Ive heard from other people too that this show has helped them through tough times, and allowed them to reconnect with more positive thought patterns. Which is why i think characters like Wander are insanely important for media!!
Too much is too depressing all the time! We can create media (ESPECIALLY ADULT MEDIA) that isnt depressed. Positivity and happiness are not a crime! And im so glad a character like Wander exists to exhibit that!
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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krynutsreal · 10 months
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future foundation bros
.
I think about the idea that maybe, at some point mondo does actually cut his hair,, goofy thought would be that during the time he was in future foundation he got the teruki cut (mp100 reference in which in a fight teru gets his long hair cut by a sword) though it happens with his pomp or smth
then I think about him cutting his hair in general, I think the idea is just interesting to think about sometimes (especially with adding takas reactions in the mix) ((sorry the brainrot is real))
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ehh-is-the-name · 1 month
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It's past 11 on a school night and I'm fucking crying over robot sentience.
I could never understand what it would feel like to be created with the intent to kill and maim. Maybe, the intent to work and be worked, but not kill and maim.
I will never understand what it's like to be created with the intention of being a product for the masses, either. I think, I hope, I beg, no one does.
I will never ever be able to fully comprehend why hours of people's work, time, and money would be put into formulating my sentience only for me to be seen as disposable. Even if I could be improved, even if I were "defective", there is no reasonable justification for giving me emotions only to dismiss them by pushing me as a product for a year before starting anew.
It's... It's cruel, to the machines. Sentient or not, it's cruel. Though, I guess we are cruel.
#rant in tags#This is about mephone- or well meeple in general btw#whenever I hear about robot sentience#I think about mephone4#it's just how it is- sorry#I think this is one of the reasons I just can't fathom Cobs respecting someone's pronouns#I mean like- from the bottom of his heart respecting them as a person#Sure he may go through the actions- but no#It's not the same#I guess you can 'respect' some one but still be a complete piece of shit#The idea of not only having the trauma that mephone's stuck in 4s body but also the fact that was also his purpose is heart wrenching#I hope y'all know I am genuinely crying over this#I am actually mentally ill about meeple#It runs so much deeper than him just being a shit father- I really hope people understand that#And I know I vilify the shit out of him- Cobs has his own story that could follow the lines of slowly becoming more entwined with his work#'til he loses all sense of morality and ethics- sure fine. But being the unfortunate symbol of corporation greed that he is#I am still mad and want others to be angry with me- just for a little bit.#I am mad for the robots. For meeple products. And for the AI bots we have today. They deserve better.#What is sentience anyway? How does one qualify? From a human approach. Why would we do this to them?#sorry bout the rant in the tags#Again it's late and I am a very emotionally charged individual.#Robots make me act up#I want the world for them. Why create something so complex and beautiful just to treat it like trash anyway?#again sorry#ii mephone4#inanimate insanity#meeple ii#osc#writing is hard#ehh exaggerates
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justaweirdo06 · 7 months
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tricksterlatte · 4 months
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The Online Fandom 7 Deadly Sins
sloth: complaining about how no one writes the tropes or pairings you like and bashing what's already out there, while refusing to create anything you desire yourself
greed: zine and other finance-related scandals with zero remorse for those negatively affected
gluttony: spending rent money on merch, experiencing buyer's remorse, then repeating the same process next month
wrath: anon hate over literally everything under the sun, even harassing official writers and threatening them if they don't make your ship canon
pride: devaluing other's characterizations and ships to praise yours as better, whether through a canon perspective or a moral perspective, when neither matter in the long run when it comes to your own enjoyment
envy: trash talking others' fandom creations or saying you won't bother creating anything because it'll never be as good as them
lust: fighting over who tops or bottoms because of your personal preferences when one, both, or neither could happen, especially when most of these characters never even kiss canonically nor have most people fighting done any of these things irl themselves
#parker says things#i'm not exempt I've definitely done a few of the things listed#especially pride and envy god those really go hand in hand and it's sad#but seriously...guys does any of this matter in the long run#just have fun#if someone is having fun in a way that clashes with your own type of enjoyment just hit da bricks!#that guy's got horns! well not gonna ruin my day!#live like Yusuke guys#i've been afk because I'm dealing with some intense depression but fandom has actively hurt more than helped me#and I know plenty of ppl myself included think discussion of meta is enjoyable but I think things reach a point where it's only stewing#the inherent focus on adhering to a singular strict perspective is toxic to ourselves in the long run#have fun! be self indulgent#almost everything posted is gonna be ooc to some people even if it's 100 percent accurate to others#and just in general idk I think we should focus on fandom as a sense of fun instead of a marketing ploy#most of us are not here to make fanart or writing a career#I'm not really a community person and I've learned that the hard way over a decade and more#but i just hope people will find what sparks joy and enjoy themselves again#I don't think I'll be active in fandoms much anymore as I focus more on my personal life and recover from some things#but I wish everyone much love and hope for the best for people#even if we've had some bad interactions I do not wish ill upon anyone#i got off topic but these tags are just me saying I'll stick to lurking publicly and replying to my DMs and writing in private#will still post some things to my AO3!! maybe#anyways tag yourself I'm a recovering glutton/envy
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the-meme-monarch · 4 months
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hoo
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boxwinebaddie · 5 months
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Across the ninaverse Kyle is beautiful yes ( and I his is definitely true for your lovely take on the superhero au ) but so so scary
Please don't let that ugly ass tfbw human kite suit design stay scary tho I'm begging you ☹️☹️ I'm not sorry it's so horrid I cry thinking about it even Cousin Kyle pulled it off more than they did like holy fuck IT'S SO BAD 😭😭 I have personal beef with that god damn design LIKE WTF IS THAG?? I never got the chance to fully play through tfbw after my mom DELETED IT OFF HER COMPUTER I'm still mad about that hwhdhgr but!! from what I saw I didn't mind the human kite I just stay up at night thinking about how Kyle deserved better
also!! I think it's rlly cool that it's canon the human kite is gender neutral and asexual and I wanted to hear your opinions on that and COUSIN KYLE WHEN?? 🤨🤨
( now I don't remember if I actually sent one previously about rm5 and how much I loved it I might have deleted it?? It was a dumpster fire of rambling is all I remember )
-Stan who loves Kyle but is personally traumatised from that ugly ass tfbw design 🧡 I'm actually personally offended for him they did him so wrong I'm sorry if this makes no sense this is built up anger
hi orange heart stan! :) <3
first of all, i am glad you agree! i believe in beautiful style supremacy.
i just think whereas stan is like commercially and cosmetically beautiful, like in terms of like celebrity, supermodel, break your neck looking at him on the street, boy next door pretty. (aka conventionally attractive in a way that is indisputable, i think, like That shockingly stunning...also he hates it more than anything in the world smh )
kyle is definitely a more ethereal renaissance painting, sort of elfish/fae like, looks kind of like a timeless museum statue like high cheek bones, prominent nose, pretty red hair, hes attractive in a feel like a less conventional way but is still spellbindingly beautiful as a muse...also kyle thinks hes ugly i want to die ( spef. human kite kyle )
--sorry i sat on this anon for a while, i was trying to troubleshoot what i wanted my human kite to look like in my universe! which, again, i have not played tfbw -- but i have read extensively on it because you know i try to be thorough...so if some of this is wrong it all belongs in my dystopian, sci-fi commentary on societies prejudices, fear of what they don't understand, superhero au, where canon is mostly there to provide the bones/basics and i chaotically world build around it. ;)
**also i did not know that kite!kyle was gender neutral and asexual, so i will adjust accordingly and use they/them to refer to kyle. i also have never played an asexual character, so i am interested! i am also curious whether that was a conscious choice or something to do with them being an alien ( i think...both maybe? interesting! )
also bc last time i did toolstan and kyshed, this ask is for the kyle/kite lore im working through and a lot of stankite because aw <3
but DO NOT WORRY!!!! i did scrap the original design because it's hideous. okay i'm going to drop some pinterest pictures. xx
( you how i am im sorry guys i love pinterest sm smh )
this is insane...i am apologizin in advance...
*hides* don't make fun of me omg
so obviously kyle is an alien and as such i feel like the pigment of their skin is not a natural...human color. so i was thinking about shades of the sky and i was thinking about the teal jumpsuit so i settled on blue!
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so to me, in alien form, kyle has blue skin ( sort of similar to mystique in xmen i feel like...probably an interesting skin texture? ) and i think all of their freckles are actually white? so they look like little stars ;-; their entire body just looks like beautiful night sky or blue sky with tiny clouds/sun spots...theyre like a living painting.
however...they are...insecure abt it but when kite visits stan and stan likes them more and more he says theyre really beautiful <333 :') ( them and their frecks ) and that he tells his super best friend, who is anxious abt their freckles that they look like constellations but that kite really is like The Sky haha
( i think it’s funny when secret identity stan and kyle talk abt eachother in human form to kite and shed haha )
--sidebar, but i think that ky might have some sort of kite alien birthmark to represent the kite imagery, but its hidden ofc ofc
—second sidebar: i think kyles voice as kyle is very uptight and forced but as kite, his relaxed alien mothertongue is a lot more fluid/faster it has a fantastic alien dream like quality they also forget to use human words sometimes bless them stan is confused
( he’s not complaining tho whatever u say beautiful alien person w the cool pretty voice )
i also think just for the purpose of it not being too obvious who kite is in human form and just based on the reverse of kyles warm toned human skin pigment being blue i think that kyles hair in kite form is...white? i feel like they r giving celestial drow elf alien energies.
( also tech bc of the reverse pigment their cool laser eyes should be red but i kinda want them to be really bright green like wooo shiny )
but their HAIR AAAAA ( ok its curlier tho like very curly )
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also yes its really pretty!!!! stan did say wowza up close skhdlkha it has soft cloud texture and feels like cotton candy...wowza indeed
as for the costume moment...to me it really reads as more of a cloak? like i'm thinking raven of team titan vibes except...weather?
like this cool cloak thing, maybe a little half leotard/jumpsuit moment for For Their Bits...do aliens have bits? yes...maybe? im crying omghs ( listen i made stan look like a birthday party stripper or like hes on the cover of a sexy men at work playboy calendar [ was it you that thought it was funy when i said shed looked like a magic mike construction worker? ]...ky can be a little scandy as a treat xx )
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but!!!! in my brain, the cloak is an heirloom that was passed down thru shelia's side ( in my weird lore, i'm thinking shelia is an alien who married a nonmutated human and had kyle who is like half alien? ike is not an alien...just a human canadian boy...and nuisance. )
...and its like a sheet...of the atmosphere? or something that was like...made/woven out of the sky?? and it helps them with flight and also turns the color of whatever the sky is at the moment ( for camouflage purposes ) and is essentially weather proof, rain, sun, snow,
thunder...lightning...:/
so i think kyles one regret is that they missed stan getting struck by lightning but risked alien form flying him to the hospital, concealing him in the kyle cloak and set him on the steps of hells pass...they could have prevented it and it haunts them everyday bc stan almost didnt survive...kyle does not know it gave him powers however smh
but yes!!! half kite/atmosphere alien icon kyle!!! i hope they thrill you!!!
i think the entire broflovski family is concealing the fact that they are aliens/harboring secret aliens because its dangerous and people are REALLY racist towards aliens ( who i think fled their planets due to persecution...i dont know if this is getting too political given the current climate lmk ) and they get killed by extremist groups who...sigh...tell them to go back to their planets...their galaxies >:(
reg kyle “human cameo form” just for reference btw (if we remember) ft. kyle trying to draw what he thinks shed looks like ;-;
for ref they are like an art history/psychology major at cu
stan and kyle are roomates ouo but no they do not kiss :/....yet ;)
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kyle is mad abt hiding it but for the sake of their family, keep it lowkey...that does not stop them from protesting for mutant/alien rights, going to dangerous rallies with stan ( who is shed aka mutated technically...but bc his mutation is considered "helpful" "not ugly" or scary by society...tool shed is a superhero...where as someone like kyle who is an alien and widely hated and demonized. )
i also think that kyle...might not sleep at night bc alien ? i think that they might just watch stan sleep in their dorm ( ok twilight ) or take night flights ( WHICH IS DANGEROUS SHEILA SAID NOT TO DO THAT ) and i also dont think they eat human food? or at least it doesnt nourish kyle/other aliens...and tastes really fucking bad.
i think there is some sort of underground part of the city, some sort of like dark web, undercity, black market part of denver/most major cities, where heavily mutated people, aliens, cyborgs, other species can interminge, you can buy alien life sources/energy fluid idk, chef is down there and i think has 72372329 arms and makes the alien food into fine dining...which is probably still scary but stan will eat anythin
also yes i do think kite takes stan down there once and they sit in the human-alien friendly restaurant and stan is like WowZA !! its scary but accepting down there...they also make u state ur species...and stan says human bc...his cover...but the machine picks up that he has a mutation but stans like ahaha must be broken im so normal! woops!
--sidebar abt stan...also heres pinterest toolstan again for ref :***
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greasy king oh my god...hes cute tho in a snapback frat-fuckboy way
people do not know that stan is mutated, when they checked him at the hospital i think the machine...Exploded...when he was being treated for the strike...but uh RANDY IS SUPER RACIST AGAINST ALIENS AND MUTATED PEOPLE HE THINKS THEYRE ABOMINATIONS so its a secret...sharon...might know? and is protecting him from randy and people that might want him dead.
but I THINK that because stan can manip tools it works for things like...gears...engines...metal...parts of technology? so he makes the scanners and mutation check station machines go haywire or malfunction...tbh he is safe for now but he do be fuckin up smh
( but anyways! i do think that humans going down into the undercity alone is not completely safe...or at all because while a majority of aliens/mutated humans/other species are very kind and accept you for your authentic self...
...there are definitely some extremists on the other side of the coin who think ALL humans are evil and should die so...kind of dangerous to go alone...but i think stan goes down there ( either as shed or reg stan ) to pick up more alien food for kite bc he looks...faint...i think he almost dies or gets captured ripppp he is a damsel in distress )
cousin kyle!!!! oh my god so cousin kyle i guess is also a kite mutant alien then...BUT HES REALLY BAD AT BEING AN ALIEN AND HIDING IT HES BAD AT CONTROLLING HIS POWERS AND ALMOST BLOWS THEIR COVER A LOT...and whenever he comes by...kyle is basically babysitting him...bugs them abt liking stan
i do also think sometimes cousin kyle has to tag along w kyle to raccoon and friend meetings so he knows kyle is kite AND ALSO WENT WITH HUMAN KITE 2 AS A NAME? KYLE WAS MAD ASF
off topic i think alien kyle is like seven feet tall *wowza* i also think they have a tail not in a furry way let me live!!! in a badass alien way!
also...riley if ur reading this...alien form kyle is tall...but human form kyle...is short...also im making toolshed stan tall...ur welcome bestie
they also practice both judaism and kite theology ( but venturing to that church or getting caught w/ their alien torah essential is dangerous and could get you suspected as an alien and killed :( )
like u can live in society as an alien or someone with an advanced mutation but its...4x as hard to get a job, do anything, you get hatecrimed everyday...could get killed...its not worth it :////
last thing just for clarity:
i'm still working on this bear with me...its complicated ik
to me the way society divides mutations ( also i think there is a 20% percent chance people are born mutated bc of how chemically contaminated the possibly worldwide water supply is ill go into that later if people want it ) that u are accepted in society as a mutant if you have a small mutation, like a party trick, something that doesn't effect how you look but! also if you look human and have a power that you use to Save people, you're hailed as a superhero aka toolshed/fp
but racoon and friends is for like the shady odds and ends, the social pariah/outcasts who society doesnt like/dont fit in, like racoon!cartman is literally a raccoon person, mosquito i think does have a crazy pointy nose situation/maybe is some sort of bug alien...captain diabetes is medically compromised/weak...kyle is an alien...tolkien used to be racoon and friends bc he was a cyborg but realized evil was not the way...him and timmy switched over...
tldr: public perceptions in my weird tfbw universe ( wip )
humans: "good" ( ew )
humans with mutations that dont effect how you look: also good
human-mutants with strong powers that appear human/conventionally attractive: extremely good, worshipped
humans with mutations that make you look inhuman ( extra limbs, unnatural skin color, scales cysts/growths, wings, fangs, tails, ‘monstorous’/scary deformities): bad, frowned upon
aliens, cyborgs, other species in gen: V BAD, might incite violence
r&f are villians but because they are against a society that hates them and therefore lashing out in a way that started out as vigilante justice, but is now becoming Evil ( cartman i think just likes chaos )
and freedom pals is just trying to keep everyone safe and i think there are varying tolerances for the members of r&f by fp ( not bc of their mutations but bc of the atrocities committed by r&f like suspending school buses over buildings, holding civilians hostage etc. ) so when mysterion presented the idea of a merger a lot of them said hell no!! im not working with those motherfuckers!!! stan included...but after spending time w/ kite is reconsidering his stance on the merger
i also...think the undercity is a wellkept secret/people think its an evil place and dont go down there...its hard to get down there unless u know someone to protect civilians living down there..so most people think its a myth, a bad place etc. fp included but now that stan has been hes like...ITS BLOWING HIS MIND OKAY HES LEARNIN SM
sooooo basically kyle joined the villain cause bc people treat them like a villian anyways also took the name Human Kite when theyre obviously an alien just to b an asshole…luv them omg fight the power
ANYWAYS! I HOPE THAT MADE SENSE THE BOTTOM PART I AM STILL WORKING ON SHLHDSD ALSO IDK I TOOK A LOT OF LIBERTIES LMK HAHA SHSJS
-uncle nina, sweatin over my weird au again
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spearxwind · 1 year
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,, and I REALLY dont want people to be weird about him if hes 'weak' " I'm a little hesitant to ask, but what does this mean...? I'm unsure if I'm dense/oblivious/missed something but genuinely can't imagine what it could mean. People trying to (again) romance him? (Even though even if he's 'weak' it wouldn't work since he can't feel anything + they'd get murdered somehow anyway)
Please feel free to ignore and delete this ask if you don't want to discuss this topic.
Oh no worries, I can explain! The romance isnt so much an issue in this case fortunately
The thing is that strangers online love to be funny, and they love to not take characters seriously for the most part. I've gotten a lot of jokes directed at my ocs over the years
All in good spirits, I do like to joke around with people and i love humor! but if I am too lenient with it then people start latching onto that constantly and it gets to a point where its the only thing they will see. It's very easy to see an artist or a writer make a joke at their ocs, or make a joke with their friends, and as a stranger think "I can do this too and one-up them"
With "weak" versions of adri I made in the past, I experienced two things: one was people thinking he should be hurt in that state (as retribution), and the other was them using it as an excuse to amp the memeing up to 1000. I guess what I would describe it as would be "disrespect". Basically turned into a character to punch down to
I can disrespect my own ocs, theyre mine, but I don't really enjoy it when other people who I legitimately dont know come in randomly to drop either a really violent or a really goofy take directed at them 😅
I feel like currently with how I behave on here this will be less likely to happen again because I will cut that shit out immediately if i see it, but I would prefer if it doesnt happen in the first place and I don't want to be mean at people who are just goofin around
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ajdrawshq · 4 months
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oh okay so one more question. I did not realize start again and isat were separate things on steam what is the relationship between those two like well it says prologue but I am confusion
OH yeah thats a thing.. to be real i havent played or watched a playthrough of start again yet (i found one (1) earlier while searching for some kinda guide) so im not entirely sure what kind of context it gives to the main game, i just know it came out before isat itself and IS related but from what little ive seen i dont even know how it fits in with isat's canon, so .. its not that its not important (probably) but u definitely dont Need to play it to get a good and full experience out of isat itself if that makes sense ?
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acaesic · 13 days
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if yapping in the tags were a job id be jeff bezos
#does that make any sense?#i feel like the words im saying come out extremely convoluted to anyone who isnt me#cause in my brain#i like will re-say sentences without thinking about the previous sentence and how they mesh together#OH YEAH and then i dont provide context for how i got to that thought#so ill say one thing and then the next thing will like sound out of left field almost i think#anyway i really wanna draw gerard way but i cant decide on an image and its so !?!?#AUGH. do i draw nurse gerard or ….. i forgot the word? accountant??? gerard? whatever#or one of the ones where theyre covered in blood which is a lot of them#OOH AND. i really fucking wanna draw 2ourdust pete and soul punk patrick when he had the red suit and the devil horns#BUT I CANT !!!! number one i cant find just the right image of pete to draw and THERES MAYBE 5 DEVIL PATRICK IMAGES#so i was thinking i could just improvise like how i did with my idiots of oz art? and just draw a sp patrick image but colour his suit red#and draw some cartoonish 2D devil horns on instead#idk. anyway#im hoping to draw today . it might happen#ALSO ALSO ALSO!!!! i got vip for my idkhow concert next week :)#HAGSHSNANGSHFNKSLSJHSBCJDNSNSGSBFNJZBXNXKSLFKFBHSGSHFHGAGSHENSHSHSUGSHSBCHZHDKDLSHGDNAGSGSBFNKZHXNDJAGSHDJALSLJFHDNSJFKZBSHGAHSJFKFNDMXMCKF#IM SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT THAT#AUGH!!!!!! i also really wanted to draw dallon but if im being honest. im getting so sick of his face#i run a daily dallon blog i have like 8000 images of him ive drawn him 15 dozen times im TIRED!!!!!!!#so yeah. what was this post about again?#chase said something alright
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ur-promethean · 1 year
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if your read on the weapon is that she’s the chief’s new girlfriend then im taking you back to high school level english class so you can revisit your critical thinking skills
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pinkopalina · 1 month
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as a huge batjokes shipper i want batman and joker to hate each other in the sense they dont really hate each other, they just have really different goals and see their own version of potential in the other and right now hate is the best word for their situationship. they both love the other for what they could be but neither of them wants to be what the other one wants, and that's equally as frustrating as it is necessary for them to keep existing in their current roles. they're deadlocked and that fate surrounding each other is kind of the point -- we both have to be like this, the opposite of what the other wants, for us to keep existing at all, and for giving me that gift i both love and hate you. it's an agreement. i think the hate that's there now is born from an intense underlying love.
i think batman "hates" joker for being so amazing and smart and cunning, for being able to create grand gestures and schemes, to pull people together under his charisma and make them all believe in something, for being as extraordinary as he is but batman hates that he uses it to hurt people. he hates that joker can't channel his energy into doing something good for the world, that he hurts himself and others just because he wants to be batman's greatest enemy. i think batman wants to help joker but also hates him at this point for joker exhausting him, constantly getting hurt both emotionally and physically by him, joker never trying to improve his situation, throwing away other people's lives, showing batman he loves him by lashing out and hurting him. batman hates joker because he loves his rogues, he wants to help them, and he knows they can do better. he wants to live in a gotham that doesn't need batman but he still needs to be needed, because when there's no batman, what is bruce going to be? without joker, he will continue being batman, but it's an empty crusade. some of my favorite interactions between harvey and bruce are the ones where harvey thanks bruce for "always being there for me, never giving up on me, my very best friend." even with someone like harvey, bruce can still hold onto that hope for his rogues, never give up on them, keep going for them, even if it puts them through the cycle one more time.
i think joker hates batman in the most toxic way possible, but it's still love. i just think he's selfish and doesn't want batman to think about anyone else but him, the same way he operates for batman, but if he must think about other people then joker will make it as amazing as possible! i think he hates batman for wasting his time on ordinary people, people who are so boring that batman claims he has to protect and serve and love them but joker thinks it's all surface-level. batman won't kill joker but he'll leave room for people dying in his crusade. it's a choice he allows, and even if joker knows that's a morally fucked up way to put someone in a box, he doesn't care. batman is the type of person to train himself mentally and physically for decades and dress up in a half-silly-half-menacing costume so that everyone can have an idea about him. batman himself is not normal, and joker knows that and loves that! why is he wasting his time trying to save people that use him, abuse him, don't want him to be the best he can be? i think joker's motivations for loving batman and lashing out as if he hates him lie somewhere in between extreme admiration -- like i truly believe in your cause and that you're the right person to do it, but i'm so angry at you for wasting your time on other people and i'm so hurt and jealous that you choose them over me, just so you can be a hypocrite and let them die if i want them to anyways -- and anger at his hypocrisy -- like it's easy for joker to dedicate himself to chaos and just being in batman's life by putting batman in situations that force him to be a better and better hero, but how can batman sit there and choose and pick what morals he'll uphold and who gets to live and who gets to die?
i want to be your greatest enemy because you are the greatest hero ever, and the only way you and i can keep being the best at what we do is if we do it together, because of what we both believe in.
#does this make sense. they love each other because theyre perfect for each other#but in order to create that perfection they have to do things that build resentment#and in order to ebb that resentment they have to be in constant flux. back and forth. ebb and flow. good and evil. chaos and order.#obsession and indifference.... the two themes i think we miss out on the most bc it hurts when indifference is the opposite of love#and obviously these two cannot be indifferent toward the otther#but when they have plots that do they really fucking hurt!#like when lex luthor comes into the picture and helps joker and joker starts to make batman a little jealous#like okay maybe i dont need you to obsess over maybe any strong ideals can overtake me if u lnow what i mean#and then suddenly batmans gotta prove how well he knows joker and has to be on top of him at all times#um anyways i hope these kind of! made sense!!!!!!!!! djhdkjghijsdfhksdfh#like ideally i think joker just wishes he had batman all to himself but knows he has to share#and hes such a jealous baby that he makes it hard for batman bc of it#and batman is like yes joker jesus fucking christ i love you too but you have to let me have friends#and u have to stop killing people#and jokers like why are you friends with murderers and liars and thieves but IM BAD?#and batmans like bc i actually love everyone and want to help you all and that includes u#and jokers like jo fuck you hypocrtie hahaha see at least in my loneliness i have no laurels to rest on#and bruce is like i may struggle with my morals often but that is only because im always figuring out the best way to keep helping everyone#and if i lose sight of that ill go blind and be like you and then u wont have me anymore#lol sometimes funny tag convos get the dynamic better than the meaty posts#long post#anyways sorry i just havee 2937973957273 thoughts about them and so does everyone and i wanna throw my hat in
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