#conflict. I need to delete that post the amount of takes on there that are like | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pettytiredandjewish · 30 days

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you know one thing ive noticed that irks me is that how hamas supporters always tend to attack on israeli supporters like the latter will be minding their own business on social media and just have a simple israeli flag in their bio; and then out of nowhere you have all these self-righteous so-called pro-palestinians who are really just hamas supporters attacking and calling all types of curses to those israeli supporters just because of the israeli flag. however has anyone ever seen an israeli supporter go to a so-called pro-palestinian's page and attacked them for having a palestinian flag in their bio? NO.

Oh I’ve noticed. The amount of hate messages that I’ve seen pro pal people post on random Israel or Jewish blogs/social media pages (who are literally minding their own business) is ridiculous. I’ve heard that it’s really bad on TikTok. I guess a whole bunch of pro pal and anti Zionist people started spamming someone on TikTok (mind you- I don’t even think this person was even Jewish (I could be wrong)) about how she was silent on the whole I/p conflict. It got to the point where she deleted her account and maybe her other social media pages too due to the constant harassment. This whole thing is just really fucked up.

To be honest I have never seen Israelis/ Jews harass pro pal and anti Zionist pages. When there is disagreements happening- Israeli/jewish bloggers are polite when handling the pro pal and anti Zionist crowds. We stay on track on the argument/ we’re polite but not too kind (because we can only handle so much bull shit)/ we try to guide them to resources that backs up on what we are saying/etc… when I handle them (because they really love to start things with me lol) I did try to be kind to them, but obviously that did not work out. So I’ve stopped being kind- I’m polite. I’ll admit that I do have a mouth on me and cuss words so slip out (but in my defense- I was raised by a dad who had a mouth of a sailor- tbh he could make the sailor look like a saint- and a mom who was raised in both the city and country. Combine that together and you get me lol)

But for the pro pal and anti Zionist crowds it’s totally opposite… like holy crap- and I thought that the pro trump people were bat shit crazy. They are constantly stalking and harassing Israelis/jewish people and their social medias, creating lists, full on spewing antisemitic shit/ etc… they really do terrify me.

It’s really scary that they’ve ramped up their hate. With what’s been happening in college campuses all over the world. If anyone is still in college- please stay safe. Your safety comes first. If you don’t feel safe in an area please leave. If you don’t feel comfortable by yourself, ask someone to go with you. Make sure that you have your phone on you and that it’s charged. Take self defense classes if you can or even watch self defense videos (basic moves can and will save you if you are in danger). If you are going out- make sure you tell someone and even give them your gps location. Document everything too- just in case you need to fill out a police report (even if the police doesn’t do shit, creating a paper trail will help you out). If things gets really bad and you need to drop out of college or switch to online- do it. Don’t risk your health and safety when dealing with those fuckers. To those pro pal and anti Zionist crowds who are participating in these violent protests or see no issues with it- y’all need to fucking open your eyes. You are creating a dangerous atmosphere for everyone and making things really worse.

#jumblr #antisemitism #leftist antisemitism #fuck antisemitism #fuck hamas #anti zionism = antisemitism #to my jewish and Israeli friends #y’all are amazing #i love you #and please stay safe #to the pro pal and antizionist crowds #stop harassing Jews and Israelis #just fucking stop it #it’s not helping palastine #you are making things worse #y’all I’m so tired of this shit #the jews are tired #please leave us alone

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batsarebetterthanpeople · 4 months

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People who keep bringing up that damn letter don't give a shit about Palestine, not one. Or Guz, who himself said OFMD wasnt the project where he had to compromise his politics.

Also, the letter, while obviously not good and shouldn't have been signed, came about when there was still a ton of misinformation being spread about what was actually going on. But the letter wasn't brought to the internet's general attention until a few weeks later and surprise surprise, no one bothered to check.

as you said, his name is the only one that still gets brought up about it (I didn't even know Con signed it until you said it). Obviously he's not beyond criticism but right now the way people are so gleeful to rip him apart over the flimsiest things is honestly getting a little disturbing.

Actually I repeated misinfo I saw on tumblr because someone made an intentionally misleading post. Con did not sign the letter. However when someone said that he did I was like "yeah that tracks" because I distinctly remember Con posting on twitter before he deleted about how brave someone was for "coming out" as a zionist. Con signaled Zionism in this instance and hasn't said shit since, unlike Taika who has said that he didn't really know what was going on with that hostage thing and that he shouldn't have to know about every geopolitical conflict ever, which fair enough I'm not read up on what's happening in Sudan right now. I sort of am trying to limit the amount of misery that I can't effect which I allow myself to take in and my country is actively funding Israel so I chose to learn about it for that reason.

But like Madonna signed the letter, Orlando Bloom signed the letter and nobodys coming for the Lotr fandom (I don't think they should), Paul Rudd signed the letter and they're not coming for ant man gif makers. Lana Del Ray signed it, and so on. linkie

like I don't think you should harass these people's fans on this basis we need to stop insisting that everyone only view unproblematic media, but come the fuck on. There's non jewish people on there who haven't said jack or shit about it and you're coming for this guy? transparently an excuse to hate on a brown man and his gay show. You'll notice they're not fucking with the Thor enjoyers. It's just us fags that get their anons.

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rosie-bee · 3 months

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Bit of a vent/rant but tldr: I kinda need a break and might be offline for a little while. I’m not sure when I’ll be back. I’d like to be cause I usually like this app, I’ve just had a rough week. I’m not deleting so I’ll still try and respond to actual notifications, but I’m not really going to post and I’m gonna stay away from my dash.

I’ve been just feeling like lately Tumblr and maybe social media in general this past week has felt just extra draining rather than something I actually enjoy. I’m someone who doesn’t like to conflict with people especially mutuals/those I’d consider friends about stuff that technically doesn’t really matter at all. So I kind of tend to just block the source and move on.

Because I don’t like standing up for myself and my interests though, it’s kinda led to this feeling that like… if I stand up for myself at all that I’d be mean and unfair to do so. Even when it comes to stuff I know is blankly false, I feel like the only things that would come of it are either i generally offend someone, get told it’s not that serious, or I’d just end up in an argument over stuff that technically doesn’t really matter.

It’s led to this internal feeling that I’m sure people who know me could attest to that I feel like my interests are less worthy than others. I’ve wrapped my head into circles, convinced that every person I know around me is inherently more interesting and just better than I am. But were I to say that, I’d feel like all I’d get in return is told that I get to emotionally invested, and that it’s wrong for me to take everything I see that’s negative towards what I’m interested in personally.

I have wrapped myself into a belief that if I am not worthy of feeling passionately about things, including things that are typically a positive for me. Which is my own problem but seeing a lot of negativity towards my interests wrapped with feelings that I can’t stand up for them or I’ll just prove someone else’s point, it’s just been mentally really tiring.

As for well, what’s the point of even posting all this? I can’t say I have much of one aside from that I just have stuff I want to get off my chest. There’s little parts of me that really do want to just lash out. The issue there is I have a hard time even allowing myself to just feel my own feelings. Internet culture and mixes of just how I grew up have led me to this strange belief that if what I feel isn’t either agree to disagree feelings or something kind, then I’ve committed some kind of moral evil. I tend to give a significant amount more grace to others than I’m willing to give myself. And I know that all wraps back into that belief that others are inherently better than I am. But my self awareness of my feelings while believing that it is morally wrong for me to feel anything unkind and not completely compassionate are not a good or healthy mix. I have tried for some reason in my twenty years to build up this person who lets nothing get to them, and have had a hard time considering what an enormous ask that is.

So I need some time to try and actually connect with things I really enjoy that isn’t just scrolling endlessly on my social media, and not being able to mentally filter out what I do and don’t want to engage with. I should try and write more, draw, maybe write my own little analysis of all of the music that I like. I’ve had a hard time with deciding to not be on social media for the main reason of I’m just not sure what to fill my time with. For now, I’ll try and get on that. If I’ve got like, messages or interactions from other people I’ll try to respond. I just kinda need to stay of my tumblr dash for a bit.

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jesskasb · 6 months

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Hi! Former DBD player here - it's a fun game that I played almost every weekend for a few hours (for several months... I'd be willing to say almost a year actually) but the playerbase is extremely toxic to the point where there's no way you can play the game and not get insulted in the endgame chat. If being called terrible things because you had the audacity to be good (or bad) at the game (on either side) would affect you, I'd recommend not playing the game. But there's so much more.

I have a computer with a 1 TB harddrive and really good processor and it had a hard time playing the game. It would take full days to update every time they released a patch. Soon, my computer was very slow and not working. I checked my space and realized that half of my computer's space was being taken up. Since I needed to get rid of unnecessary programs, I deleted DBD and I lost a full quarter of that full computer harddrive space. I could almost feel my computer breathing a sigh of relief when it was gone and it started functioning properly again.

The devs also don't really know how to program a game, leading to the game breaking frequently, typically whenever they release a new update. These breaks can last anywhere from days to weeks depending on how the devs handle it. A lot of people theorize that they have a working version of the game and that after DBD breaks, they'll release basically DBD 2, leaving anybody who played DBD basically SOL.

Oh also the devs have been known to take any critique towards them or their game extremely personally to the point where one of them actually went into the account of a Fog Whisperer (one of the Twitch streamers they pay to rep their game by playing it every single stream and blow smoke up the dev's asses) and deleted his custom skins that they game him, then said Fog Whisperer found out he wasn't a Fog Whisperer anymore through a Twitter post iirc. The dev team has also split up friendships due to another Fog Whisperer losing his status (also for pointing out how much the game breaks due to spaghetti code). He had a friend on the DBD team (I believe in marketing but it's been a while since I paid attention to DBD) and that friend was forced to stop being his friend and mod due to a "conflict of interest."

tl;dr it's a fun game but I genuinely cannot recommend getting into it

hey thank you so much for the advice!!! mostly i wanted to get into it for funsies since an irl friend has been asking to play together, so as long as the game is fun idm if it breaks often . in terms of insults, i must shamefully admit that ive been playing an insane amount of overwatch 2 with two of the people closest to me and having a crazy joyful blast despite the fact that the players are some of the most insufferable people on God's Green Earth .

so yeah i think ill be alright if i do decide to get it!!! but its a big Maybe considering i already have a huge backlog. i dont really think ill get too invested in it outside of playing with my friends so hopefully its aaaall good.

#long post #replies

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billconrad · 6 months

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Creating A Book Outline

I began my writing adventure by typing the first chapter. My lack of planning led to many issues, and I have since learned to start every book project with an outline. It saves editing time and results in a better story.

I thought it would be an interesting exercise to describe my outline process. So… What is a book outline? It is a high-level plot summary. Once done, an author can review their concept and make radical changes. The result is a basic story framework that a writer can turn into an entire book.

How much plot is needed to begin an outline? The writer should know the general beginning, middle, and end. The length is about a paragraph. There are formal methods of creating an outline, such as the flower method. Some writers use whiteboards, post-it notes, 3x5 cards, and circles with connecting lines. My method is chaotic, terse, and cryptic because this is how my bonkers mind works.

I condense ideas into sentences that describe the base elements. The resulting difficult-to-understand mess has awful grammar and spelling. I encourage myself to explore, experiment, change, move, delete, and add during the process. The value of an outline is at this stage, and writers have complete freedom to make significant changes and push their concepts to the extreme.

Once a basic outline exists, I repeatedly review it with questions like: Does the story make sense? Is the logic sound? Is this section necessary? Is motivation apparent? Are the characters interacting enough? Does the action need more conflict? Would rearranging the sections lead to more drama? Are readers going to understand the plot? Are there any unresolved issues? Is this story so good enough to be turned into a book?

It is important to note that the character description parallels an outline. Character descriptions are an essential step but a different topic.

When my outline looks good, it is possible to show/explain it to a beta reader to get feedback. This basic description is suitable enough to identify problems and provide feedback.

This next paragraph is an outline section from my recently released fourth book. I intentionally did not clean it up to show my raw creativity. There are many apparent grammar errors, spelling mistakes, and run-on sentences. I understand this cryptic mess reads confusing, but it is clear to me.

Go to Russia, (because force) find grace, difficulty with culture, wonder around woods for two days, find grubby apple tree, building remains, ponder life, gets feeling that grace knows I am looking but refuses to show herself. men at apple tree, take to china on weird Russian plane, (loud) taken to Chinese palace, describe, lots of servants, meet Chinese harvester, pincushion man, his history: land owner, horses, agriculture, gold mining, (not environment good) communism took much of it, now no land, still had gold, built relationship with communists, owns 3 party members, they leave him alone, has a lot of dirt on them. Ask questions, claims to have developed his secret process. angry james for letting the secret out. Angry at cleopatra, did not know grace, angry that grace told james secret, secret reserved “only for the divine, not worthless people like you.” pincushion man pressure james (threat to kill) to reveal total secret. pincushion man has years of experience with torture. James talk and they compare notes.

Wow, what a rabble. However, from that mess, I wrote four chapters. The outline has a slight amount of dialog: “only for the divine, not worthless people like you.” That shows intent and what the character is thinking. I refer to one character as “pincushion man.” I did not have a name for him at that stage. My concept was that he was constantly using acupuncture, but when I tried to write that concept, it seemed silly, and I chose not to include it.

How did I use this mess to write a book? Let’s examine the first sentence. “Go to Russia, (because force) find grace, difficulty with culture.” This is out of order. In my mind (not in the outline), I had this major scene planned “(because force)” meaning that people forced James to fly to Russia. Because I had already fully developed it, I knew exactly how to write it up and did not need details for the outline.

For the next section, James needs to get to Russia. Details are required for the book, including buying an airline ticket, getting time off work, and budgeting. While I was writing this section, I kept in the back of my mind the next section, “finding grace.” (Grace is a character’s name, but I did not bother to capitalize the word.) This foreknowledge caused me to include all the necessary hooks, like background research about the local area where I would search for her.

Now that James had landed in Russia, he encountered the typical difficulties of adapting to a foreign country, and I described these details. I wanted a big mistake to show James is fallible. Before James leaves his home, he “remembers” to pack a translation book. When he lands, he realizes he forgot this book. This step adds drama and shows James is not perfect.

Let’s examine the most powerful part of an outline by pretending I identified a critical plot problem. The character James is not working. How can I fix him? What if we change the sex? How easy is it to make a major change at the outline stage? A straightforward word replacement: James to Jackie. Total time: five seconds.

Let’s change the character’s sex in a completed first draft with a word replace. “James entered the room wearing his muscle shirt. He looked angry.” The replacement is: “Jackie entered the room wearing his muscle shirt. He looked angry.” Jackie is a woman who is called “he” and “his.” The other problem is that most women do not wear muscle shirts. So, this change requires more effort than a simple replacement, and even with lots of editing, the reader would think Jackie is an oddly masculine character.

My outlines are about three pages long. As I write the book, I keep it on my second screen and refer to it as needed. An added benefit is using an outline reduces writing stress and makes the process more enjoyable. Now that I am better at creating them, they track 90% of the final plot. The missing 10% are details or issues found during the writing that require expanding or adding to the story. That is my chaotic process, and I hope you found it interesting.

You’re the best -Bill

November 18, 2023

Hey book lovers, I published four. Please check them out:

Interviewing Immortality. A dramatic first-person psychological thriller that weaves a tale of intrigue, suspense, and self-confrontation.

Pushed to the Edge of Survival. A drama, romance, and science fiction story about two unlikely people surviving a shipwreck and living with the consequences.

Cable Ties. A slow-burn political thriller that reflects the realities of modern intelligence, law enforcement, department cooperation, and international politics.

Saving Immortality. Continuing in the first-person psychological thriller genre, James Kimble searches for his former captor to answer his life’s questions.

These books are available in soft-cover on Amazon and eBook format everywhere.

#writing #books #character development #editing

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mugenloopdalove · 10 months

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i want to preface this by saying i have good intentions AND i am not the best with wording things or getting the point across. take this message if it helps, delete it if it doesn’t! you are not obligated to reply to this either, and i also understand my mindset isn’t going to work for everyone. you can’t reply to anon asks privately, but you don’t have to post this if you don’t want to, either :)

i just want to say that the amount of engagement you get doesn’t matter. i want to see your stuff! i want to see you post about your self ships and your faves and all the things you like — but i also want to remind you that getting a bunch of asks doesn’t make you any less or more valid, okay?

i admit that i get not feeling wanted or accepted by the community (there are a SURPRISING number of people who feel this way, too) so i’m not trying to be like “grrr you’re being so negative! who cares?!?! just cheer up and be magically happy :)” bc it doesn’t work like that, unfortunately 😅 but i want to remind you that you also deserve your space in the community, so please don’t delete your blog over a lack of interactions.

whether you get one letter or many, you are just as equally loved and appreciated AND worthy of having a space online. there are definitely more popular blogs out there with many many interactions (i find myself envying them, too) but that does not make them better than you. besides, i find that the people who often send them asks are like, their friends anyways. (but i lack any in the comm, so.. 💀)

me personally, i often hold back from sending letters because i don’t know many of the popular sources and am afraid of making it ooc 💔 they have anons off and i don’t want them to be weirded out or reveal my blog, etc. but never ever have i not done it because i disliked the blog personally or anything. it does not mean anyone dislikes you or doesn’t care about your ships (honestly: even if nobody cared, you should still post about the things you like) but i will admit that it does feel nice to know some stranger put the effort into writing for you, that people like hearing your stuff, so i’m also sort of conflicted...

i don’t even know where i’m going with this 😅 but i just wanted to say, from one stranger to another, you are very much loved and appreciated. i understand it can be lonely and i am not trying to give you advice or be all like “you’re too sensitive” or nothing! i am just trying to say that i hear you and i hope you either get the interaction you want or learn to be okay with the lack of it. take care and please be more kind to yourself, i hope you do not spiral into negativity and self hatred. we are only here for so long, please be more kind to yourself if you can help it.

sending all my love (and a cold pillow) 💗

Thank you... Ive just really wanted engagement lately bc I've felt pretty dam lonely and having trouble coming up with new situations. My brains been kind of repeating the same stuff on loop and unless I luck out and get an f/o dream it's just the same stuff I've seen a million times before and I'm not sure how to get new thoughts.

I also... Frequently join communities and see everyone get way more love than me and it reminds me of growing up alone a lot. Jebeheb

I'm trying to make friends in to community rlly rlly hard I'm just. Shy and awkward hdhdhfhft. I want to talk to so many ppl but outside of like memes I'm scared to. Even letters I'm scared to bc I have like... No confidence in my writing jsjsjer it's one thing if I'm writing for myself but writing for someone else is scary.

Thank you though...maybe I just need to take a breath and a step back and maybe a break. I just don't know what to do for an escape other than self ship fhfudir I never formed a lot of coping mechanisms just fiction and lately it's been harder and harder for me to get that on my own and I want help from others

I know I shouldn't rely on engagement your right Abt that. I'm trying not to and this did help me feel better. I just wish I could get some help w getting new things in my brain I guess

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feederts · 1 year

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smsverse · 2 years

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Jeremy - Week of 10/28

During this week I REALLY hammered down on tweaking the game according to what the play testers specified. A lot of this had to do with giving the level a nice flow to it. Originally, the player was just dropped into the level and forced to solve what they could based off of very little knowledge. A small part of this was intentional, but it was mostly due to a lack of time. Taking all of this into account I began to develop a new system that would help guide the players.

First order of business was creating a new Objective System! This will allow the game to track the Player's progression throughout the level, and turn the appropriate GameObject's On and Off. To do this I created a system eerily similar to that of the GameStateManager, funnily enough this was also placed on the GameStateManager script. Like the GameStateManager it uses a few Enums to operate.

Objective System Script Set-Up:

Like the UniverseSwitching function, the new ObjectiveSwitch script only runs at specific instances. Because each of the Level's exist in their own scene, I also created ANOTHER Enum that controls what Level the game thinks you are in.

Beginning of ObjectiveSwitch Script:

After this I created a script that would change which Objective the Player is currently working towards. This script is modular, so it uses a public instance of the Enum, that defines what the next objective is. While working on it I realized that many of my scripts used the same functions to do things like enable and disable player control. I realized it would be best to have one over arching version of each function that I can call. Because a majority of them have to do with UI, I added these in the Script that controls the Stability Meter.

Modular Objective Switch:

Object Set Up in Script:

New Functions In Script:

Next was one of the most important aspects that I added, that being the level's Intro Cutscene. This gives the Player an idea of where to look for each objective. This took a lot of work, as I needed to edit a Camera's render layers inside of a script and time them with the Cutscene.

CineMachine Timeline:

Cutscene Control Script:

I ran into a fair amount of Order of operations errors here, as many of the different scripts in the game get data on Awake. Which conflicts with the start of the Cutscene.

I created new UI elements that would appear telling the Player what Objective the image on screen corresponds with.

Here is an Example UI Element;

Originally these UI elements appeared flat on screen, but that looked VERY boring and basic. So, I decided to do something I don't do often, and use World Space UI. Now the Objective UI appears in the shot along side the focal Object. Also, the Objective UI was effected by the Camera Effects. So I created a new Camera that only renders the UI Layer and is NOT effected by Post Processing.

Here is the Level Intro Cutscene:

(Pay No Attention to the Missing Noir Wall at the End it randomly deleted itself without us knowing)

Finally, I began work on a system to turn off the ability to Building Switch once you get the right combination.

Script Set Up:

Additions to Function:

This was a very interesting week, and a nice cherry on top is that we finally commissioned our character model! So, I should be working with that soon. Hopefully, I'll get to work on a lot more Cutscenes next week!

#jeremy

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lanxaufood · 2 years

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hypersaline · 3 years

Text

Tutorial: Multi-Road Neighborhoods

My last couple of posts have been about neighborhoods with more than one type of (working, real, actual) road in them. It does take a decent amount of SimPE fiddling to get this working correctly, so be warned, but here’s how you can add a second kind of road to a neighborhood.

So, the first thing you need is a mod. Here’s a stripped-down version of mine at SFS, with just a single secondary road type -- @criquette-was-here‘s Rural Charm roads with Maxis sidewalks added on -- for just the temperate neighborhood type. You’ll still need Criquette’s roads so that the “primary,” unedited roads match the ones you edit. (First, please note that this conflicts with @simnopke‘s SkyFix and Criquette’s Seasoned Lot Skirt Fix but incorporates them both.) I’ll go into more detail about how to customize the mod to your liking in a later post; for today, just install it as-is.

I’m going to add sidewalks to the main street of Plasticbox’s Middleground neighborhood. See those orange circles in the middle of the intersections at the left and right? Those are tree stumps, and we’re going to use them to figure out which road tiles to edit.

Open up the neighborhood in SimPE and click on the Neighborhood Terrain resource (not the Neighborhood Terrain Geometry). You must be in advanced mode for this to work; you can enable it under Extra>Preferences>SimPE Settings. If you don’t have a Commit button somewhere on the plugin view tab, then you’re not in advanced mode, and you’ll have no way to save your work.

The Trees dropdown item should automatically be open when you select the Neighborhood Terrain resource. Scroll all the way down to the bottom and find the last two entries; those are our tree stumps. Look at the highlighted numbers and mentally round them to the nearest number ending in five. (In our case, that’s 625, 725, 625, and 625.) Those numbers mark the middles of the two tiles at the ends of the line segment we want to edit.

Open up the Roads dropdown. The numbers here are in a different order, but you want to look at the first columns with decimals. Those correspond to the highlighted numbers in the previous picture. Since the points are (625,725) and (625,625), we’ll be looking for lines where the first of those numbers is 625 exactly and the second of those two numbers is somewhere between 625 and 725. You’ll just have to scroll until you find a line that matches our parameters -- there’s no way to sort or search through this list.

So, now that we’ve found a matching line, you’ll need to look at the highlighted GUID. See how it says Texture to the left? That number tells the game what kind of road tile belongs in the (625,625) spot. Change the third digit after the 0x to a 1. (That is, you’ll end up with 0x00100F00.) Then -- and here’s the tedious part -- you have to keep scrolling through the list until you’ve found all of the matching lines. On each line, you’ll change the third digit of that highlighted GUID to a 1. Don’t forget to commit and save once you’re done.

The next thing to do is load up the game and check that everything worked. In this case, it looks like I missed one line -- you can see that there’s one tile without sidewalks on our road. No problem; we’ll just mark it with one of our stumps, delete the other, and go back into SimPE to find the line that matches the one remaining stump’s position.

Okay. Now that the last tile is taken care of, and once we’ve deleted the stump...

Let’s check lot view. Everything looks right! (Besides the Maxis road on the lot, of course.) So, if you want sidewalks on other roads, you can repeat the process; if not, the neighborhood is ready to play.

#the sims 2 #ts2 tutorial #ts2cc #s2cc

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cipheramnesia · 2 years

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You are more than welcome to delete this/not respond/etc at your own discretion, but you seem like the internet Trans Elder TM who would have something thoughtful to say on this:

I'm trans and I keep having other trans people around me blame their horrible treatment of me and/or others on puberty 2.0 or their mental health from being trans.

Do you have any advice for dealing with that on a personal level? I'm pretty emotionally fragile myself so I have a lot of sympathy, but I don't think I can keep doing this? I am so tired of being trans and being told by other trans people that they don't deserve to be held accountable for their mistakes. And I'm very tired of being told I wasn't hurt when I was.

I keep running into this sort of situation and I'm losing hope on connecting to people in my local in-person trans communities without being overly afraid.

There could be a lot of factors at play here so your mileage may vary. I don't think I'm an elder or authority per se, but it sounds like the basics of boundary setting could help reduce your difficulties.

I see boundary setting as serving two purposes. First, it defines some areas (with a moderate clarity) that are "off limits" for other people. Second, it also sets areas off limits to you. So when you decide something is a boundary, it has to also be somewhat controllable by yourself and others. For example, "the color green" is a difficult boundary to set. There's a great deal of green in the world which isn't at the control of most people at most times. But to use an example from a popular post - you can set a boundary something like "I won't talk about why I don't like the color pink." You can inform other people about this if the topic comes up, and you also have the ability, most times, to avoid or extricate you from conversations crossing that boundary.

Broadly speaking, for all purposes you don't have to make yourself physically or emotionally available in ways that make you uncomfortable, and by carefully setting boundaries you can remove some of the avenues for mistreatment or hurt feelings or so forth however.

However there is an element to self care and being disenfranchised that doesn't come up often, and that is conflicting needs.

Most topics about self care as a trans person or as a neurodiverse person or so on are framed as "versus what society deems normal or acceptable." That is, taking care of your needs as a trans person versus a cis society. Taking care of your needs as a neurodiverse versus a neurotypical society. But it's not so common to see a discussion which considers conflicting needs where it's two people whose needs aren't commonly considered on a large social scale.

A nice and easy example is something like subtitles in films. There are people for whom subtitles are essential and for whom they greatly enhance movies or television. But there are people who experience distraction and difficulty processing media with subtitles. There isn't an immediate solution for this, and ultimately it requires some degree or compromise when it happens.

For another example, you may have one person with executive function issues and a trans person with severe dysphoria, where a mundane task like "going out for groceries" is very difficult for either one. While in an ideal world society wouldn't cause this to be difficult, in a practical matter one or the other or both will have to engage with the task despite potentially severe emotional consequences. Again there isn't always an easy or simple resolution, so it's going to require some form of flexibility on both sides.

The point here being that in most queer spaces there's going to be a large amount of overlapping and conflicting needs and a requirement to compromise, so when setting boundaries there remains a need to be mindful of potentially conflicting needs.

Now there's some other stuff that is in the background here and one worry I have is that it's unusual to find a social group where every person in it have the same sort of projection of blame you're describing. It's not impossible, especially if the group is very tight knit, but in a large social circle it's rare. There's an old saying that generally goes like "if every person you meet is a jerk, the problem could be you." Because I don't know if you're talking about like a dozen friends or a big community center serving queers, it behoves me to also suggest self examination, especially if it's the latter. I say this as someone who is regularly filled with paranoid ideas about being hated by everyone around me - it's important to check your own perception as well. Depression and anxiety and a whole host of other issues can and do affect how you perceive other people's intentions.

But, to bring this full circle, even of it's something internal vs external, carefully considered boundaries can still help. I have some around my own issues to regulate them, and those are boundaries too, just inward like "assume written tones are positive not negative" or "strangers don't actually have personal feelings about you" and stuff like that. And even outward boundaries can help. To use the pink example again, having that boundary also means you walk away from the topic rather than potentially projecting on others.

I probably missed a bunch here and again I don't know how circumstances are but I hope some of this helps. If I had any final thoughts I would say remember that there's never a perfect compromise or even exchange or ideal world. The goal is to do our best to meet everyone's needs now, and try to do better when we can.

#not checked for grammar or spelling

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multitrackdrifting · 2 years

Text

The thing that I value most that I took away from leaving tumblr for a really long time is unlearning the toxic dynamics that people encourage on here. There's genuinely no need to assume the worst and routinely reward people for lashing out with bad faith interpretations of things people say which only make sense if you take the post and add like ten words that clearly aren't there or implied to mean some other thing. There's no need to assume the worst out of someone cause they only reblog funny cat pictures or something. It's like if you elevated to your every worry to "nah this is definitely the case" and it's like, okay, what the hell do you get out of living like that.

The worst thing about this place, bar NOTHING is how poorly a lot of OG massive blogs handle beef. Nobody can just hate each other for no reason, naw they give me bad vibes so they're clearly a bad person. Like okay man, when you graduate High School you are welcome to try again. It's what motivated me to delete all those years ago, just watching some 30k user and their horde of followers dogpile because *checks notes* they cannot coexist even though neither party is inherently problematic. They just don't get along which is fine?

I know that everyone has a tendency to defend their platform of choice or whatever, but I don't, I've always thought that was weird about tumblr. It's like having a gun to your back over the most asinine shit and it's like alright man, for all the good things about this site, this pressure that exists because of how anti-social a lot of the dynamics are on this place really makes it that much scarier to use because it just takes one unreasonable person dogpiling the shit outta you with non-problems they have with you instead of just blocking you and using xkit to never see their posts or something else that a reasonable person would do.

It might be ugly to hear but I was literally raised on this website (i was 14 btw! im 26!!), but it was because I didn't fully conform to the weird standards of conflict resolution that I don't burn hella bridges and can resolve conflict at work or with friends. If I followed how this site operated on these matters I'd be alone because my convictions would be misplaced and my view of other humans would be so damn cynical

Life is hard, why make it harder by having nonsensical standards that nobody could possibly live up to, not even yourself. Even if someone is marginally ignorant, just block them and call it a day, I have to deal with people who are always growing a lot in real life especially with coworkers and rl friends, so I guess my tolerance level is different and everyone draws the line differently. But with people you call friends there's not a lot a conversation can't change, don't have to go about it with shit like a callout or exerting an extreme amount of pressure on people. It's weird!

I'm glad the internet popularized the phrase "Touch grass" cause tbh that basically sums up how I feel about those kinds of bloggers. I don't know how you can have such a cynical view of other people that have given you no reason to think that about them.

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kaminobiwan · 4 years

Text

cannonball

pairing: obi-wan kenobi x jedi!reader

summary: Throwing all caution out the window, Obi-Wan dives headfirst into a long awaited confession. At least, he tries to. The universe seems to leave an obstacle for him at every turn, but Obi-Wan is nothing if not persistent.

a/n: Oh my goodness, this has got to be my proudest piece. It was one of the victims of the incident™ and I had to rewrite the whole thing from scratch, but I actually think the final version came out better than the original! The title is inspired from the summary of my previous fic Indulgence, but this one is actually the cornerstone of all of my jedi!reader x Obi-Wan fics: every one of those has stemmed from this storyline idea that has been living in my head for so long. Suffice it to say this is THE fic that I have wanted to write from the beginning — my pièce de résistance, if you will.

I hope you enjoy :-) p.s. here's my taglist form

In all the years he’s known you, Obi-Wan swears he only ever started to lie to you during the Clone Wars.

In his defense, he’d been lying to himself, too. Forcibly crushing down his much-deeper-than-platonic favor for you in the hopes that it’d disappear, forgotten in his darkest recesses, was exhausting in more ways than one. One’s mind can only be dishonest with the heart for so long.

But after more than a year and a half into the fighting, he’d felt too many times the choking fear that he’d never see you again — be it because of his death or yours.

So he’d given up in repressing his emotions, and let himself feel. In the precious minutes of reprieve amidst the horrors of combat, sometimes the only thing that could console his jaded and war-torn soul was the memory of you.

He wonders how he managed to continue for as long as he did before allowing himself to consciously love — it was well into the conflict when he came to terms with it. If he closes his eyes, he can easily remember the exact moment.

Geonosis. His return to the forsaken planet.

The chaos of it all had been staggering. He’d barely been able to hear Cody’s warning before he was shot out of the sky, and the crash that claimed the lives of nearly everyone in the transport had been just the beginning of the hellscape he’d endured.

There was an instant where he’d been sure he was going to die on the field, seconds before the remainder of his battalion was about to be overrun.

He remembers the gunfire surrounding him, piercing the falling bodies of his men as he laid helpless and injured. Cody’s shouting amidst the mayhem. The stabbing pain of his ribs that had blackened the edges of his vision. The dirt that had caked his face and armor. The sheer amount of it had been maddening.

And yet, as the bugs had closed in around him and he’d forced himself to his feet to meet his imminent end, the only thing that had run through his mind was...you.

Your name, your face. The dissatisfaction at the fact that the last time he’d seen it, it’d been distorted, static and blue from the holo you’d shared with Master Unduli. The way you’d hidden a smile as she interrupted his competitive jeering with Anakin ahead of the battle.

At least he’d made you laugh, he’d thought, and with that, he’d ignited his lightsaber.

And then the reinforcements had come. And he’d been left to sink back down on shaking knees with the image of you burning in his brain until the concerned presence of Ahsoka materialized at his side.

He hadn’t had any time to process the stunning realization that he was in love with you. He’d scarcely had a second to gather himself before he was already spouting a revised attack plan to take the droid factory, reverting to autopilot the way he always did when he assumed his identity as a war general.

But the universe had seemed intent on not letting him escape it, regardless. Just days later, he’d saved your life — you’d arrived at Point Rain with Luminara only to be taken by the Geonosian queen to be turned into a mindless, shivering zombie.

“I still haven’t forgiven you for that, you know.” You’d chirped, while tapping his nose teasingly.

“What? The stunt with the worms? You know I wouldn’t have actually let it go up your nose.”

“No, for disobeying an order to fall back and leave us behind.”

His heart had clenched at your words. Never in a million years would he abandon you if he thought there was the smallest chance of saving you. He knew that, finally.

But the fear of losing the only life he’d ever known outweighed the fear of losing you, and he’d settled with yearning for you from afar. It would be enough, he’d convinced himself. He refused to burden you with the knowledge that he’d been pining helplessly for you for Force knows how long, and ruin the careers in the Order you’d both worked so hard to construct.

That was, until now.

Until he’d seen Satine Kryze again, after decades apart, and she’d declared her surviving affection for him from all those years ago, Anakin witnessing the whole thing. After he’d seen the weight of her unspoken truth upon her shoulders. And although he regretted that he couldn’t grant her the relief from her wanting, he’d resolved that he didn’t want to spend the rest of his days the same way — slowly being crushed by his own supression. Even if his feelings were unrequited.

So he’d decided that he’d tell you, Jedi Code be damned. He wouldn’t hold it in any longer.

As the Coronet docked on the landing pad where the Chancellor was waiting, he’d been jittery with anticipation. That, and disoriented from the events that had transpired on the way there. He’d blubbered uncharacteristically when Satine had caressed his face in farewell, Anakin watching delightedly at his back. Then, as he’d turned to find a speeder to make his way to you in the Temple, the universe had yet again toyed with him — you were there, appearing on the platform out of nowhere like a summoned spirit, but not making your way towards him.

No, you were walking straight towards Satine.

You didn’t seem to notice him or Anakin behind you, welcoming the Duchess with practiced cordiality and leading her to the airbus where the other Senators were boarding, glaringly obvious that you’d been assigned on escort duty. Obi-Wan held back a groan. Of all the Jedi.

Anakin had practically collapsed in hilarity, a hand heavy on Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “The Force works in mysterious ways, Master,” he crowed. “I finally get that one.”

———

You’re perched high up on a viewing balcony of the Senate Chamber when he finds you, a little before Satine is set to address the Republic.

“You’re certainly off your game today,” you exhale an amused laugh as he skids to a stop, attempting to compose his appearance as he approaches you. “Anakin told me all about what happened on the Coronet en route to Coruscant.”

His blasted Padawan. Obi-Wan could strangle him.

“I didn’t teach him to gossip,” he grumbles, coming to stand beside you. He'd run the whole way here to catch you, but his rapid heartbeat isn’t from physical exertion. You’re as tranquil as ever, though, and your presence relaxes him despite.

You give a snort. “Maybe not intentionally. He definitely learned how to operate outside the lines of the Code by watching you.” He knows you’re poking fun at him, but his breath catches at the mention of the doctrine that dictates you both.

But he’s set on telling you. Today.

“Actually, I was hoping to talk to you about something similar.”

You turn to the Chancellor’s podium as his voice reverberates through the hall, but Obi-Wan’s hearing is fixed on you. “Of course, Obi, but it’ll have to wait until later. I think your friend is about to speak.”

He opens his mouth to reply, to bring your attention back to him, but you’re focused on the proceedings. He doesn’t like the jovial way you say friend, as if you’re almost happy about it, but he forces his gaze to follow yours as Satine begins her address.

Which, of course, goes terribly wrong. Because nothing seems to want to work out today.

Even your usually optimistic features are set with a grim expression as a testimonial from Satine’s own Deputy Minister slights her leadership, and the Senate turns against her. As her repulsorpod retreats from the center of the chamber, you cast concerned eyes towards him.

“Go,” you urge him, and he’s frozen between staying or leaving. “She needs you. I’ll buy you some time with the security detail.”

Obi-Wan doesn’t want to depart from your side, words hanging on the tip of his tongue, but he knows you’re right. He nods at you gratefully before chasing after Satine.

———

He tries again in the evening, while you’re between shifts of guarding the Duchess’ guest quarters.

“She seems...interesting,” you nod to the Mandalorian guard that passes by to take your post, speaking low enough that your conversation is relatively private. “She certainly had much to say about you.”

Obi-Wan wanted to scream. It seems everyone had been able to get you alone except for him. “I told you about that year on Mandalore after I came back,” he protests, and you shoot him a pitiful wink.

“Not the way she described it.”

Before he can demand just what Satine had let on, the sound of rapid footfalls draws both of your attention to the guard you’d greeted earlier. “Master Jedi! The Duchess is gone. We don’t know for how long.”

You curse lightly and rush down the hall to follow the Mandalorian, and Obi-Wan is about to do the same when his comm buzzes on his wrist.

He sighs in frustration. He knows exactly who it is.

———

After he’d relayed the untampered evidence to Padmé in time for the Senate convocation and Satine had been released from custody, Obi-Wan makes his way to your quarters in a determined stride. The past couple days were nothing short of a wild Bantha ride from start to finish, and he was tired of tiptoeing around you.

As he raises a shaking hand to knock outside your room, he stalls in a moment of fleeting hesitation. The impending metamorphose of your relationship nags at his brain, and he pauses. What he’s about to do will indelibly transform the dynamic between you, for better or for worse. It dawns on him that there won’t be any going back from this.

He hears your voice from a distant memory of late nights in the Temple gardens, basking in the light of the stars. Of course everything will change. Nothing can stop that.

So be it.

He stands as tall as he can manage, and knocks resolutely.

You open the door looking ready for bed, clad in a billowing camisole, face dewy from the refresher and hair still damp. He smiles at you as you open it wider. “Hello, Obi.”

He shuffles inside, meekly nodding in apology of his interruption. “I thought I’d come see you.”

Like routine, you’re already heating up a pot of water for him as you search for his favorite tea in your cupboard. Ever so thoughtful. His heart flutters beneath his robes. “I’m glad to see you found the Duchess,” you chime lightheartedly, “I had a hunch when you disappeared earlier.”

His hand finds the back of his neck. “I hope I didn’t make you look too bad, being on protection and all.”

You shake your head dismissively. “I was just glad to hear she was safe. You helped save her people from Republic occupation.”

Altruistic honesty radiates off of you, and his chest drops, in a good way. You care, and it’s written all over your actions.

You’re the best person he knows. Without question.

For a split second, Obi-Wan wonders if he even deserves you. But he pushes the thought in the back of his mind for later, hell-bent on not letting anything get in the way of what he wants to say.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

You face him fully, abandoning the tea as you take in the seriousness of his posture. He sucks in a stunted breath.

“It’s about —”

“I know.”

He startles, momentum lost as you interrupt him suddenly. Your gaze is penetrating. “What?” He asks dumbly.

“It’s about Satine, isn’t it?” Your bare arm comes up across your body to hold the other, and Obi-Wan finds himself staring at the way your too-long pants brush the floor as you sway to one side. Your sleeping shirt brushes the middle of your thighs, and he realizes how utterly small you seem in the moment. “You feel the same way about her that you used to.”

His eyes snap up to yours at your words, mind reeling. It takes him an eternity to force out a single word.

“...No.”

You tilt your head confusedly, and Obi-Wan wants to pinch himself to test if this is some sort of stress-induced hallucination. “No? You do know she’s positively infatuated with you, don’t you?”

“No, I —” he shuts his eyes desperately. “I mean, yes, I know, but I don’t —” he breaks off abruptly, opening his eyes at you with newfound willpower. Blast it.

Obi-Wan crosses the room in three steps, reaching his hands out to cradle you delicately as he pulls you in for a bruising kiss.

He hears your breath stutter, shock just about vibrating off of you, but in the next second your eyelashes graze his cheeks as you close your eyes and lean into him. His heart pounds in crazed gratification, and Obi-Wan feels downright dizzy from the sensation. He’s going to faint, he’s going to die right here in your arms —

Your hands find the top of his chestplate, fingers curling against it, but after a beat of his body singing with joy, he feels you apply the smallest pressure on his armor. You detach your lips from his slowly, and he blinks dazedly at you when you pull away. Disbelief paints your frame.

“Obi, what —”

“I love you,” he says quickly, hands still on either side of your face. “I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you. For so long.” One of your hands reaches up to clasp his own against your cheek. “I know that this goes against everything we’ve ever been taught, and you must be confused. I’m sorry.” He breaks off for a second, eyebrows creasing, because he’s not sorry. He could never be sorry for what he’s just done, not with the feeling of your lips still rippling in tingles through his brain. “But I had to tell you. I just...couldn’t go on without you knowing.”

Your mouth opens and closes as you flounder in his confession, and he studies you with more intensity than he’s felt in ages. He’s suddenly hyper-aware of everything about you, offhandedly concentrating to memorize every tiny detail. He’ll relive that kiss a thousand times over for the rest of his life if it’s the last one he’ll get.

“I — I don’t know what to say,” you manage to let out, and he presses his forehead to yours before releasing you. Say you love me, his heart cries. But Obi-Wan pushes the sentiment away.

“It’s alright,” he promises gently. You stare at him as he squeezes the hand that’s still holding his. “You don’t have to say anything.”

“Obi-Wan, I —”

Whatever you’re about to say is cut off by a loud knock from outside, and the way you jerk back from him pricks at his emotions. You quickly pad to the door, opening it a crack as he attempts to conceal himself from your unexpected visitor.

“Sorry to bother you so late, Master,” Anakin’s voice fills the air, and Obi-Wan shrinks further into the shadows. “I’m just checking in before I leave for Vanquor. I wanted to make sure you’re still available to train Ahsoka while I’m gone?”

It takes you a little to formulate a response, your eyes still wide. “Yes — of course, Anakin, always.” You attempt to shut the door, but Anakin speaks up before you can.

“Actually, I was hoping to ask you for some advice as well, if you don’t mind.”

You can’t look at Obi-Wan without giving him away, so he sends a subtle wave of reassurance your way, hoping you pick up on it.

The tension releases from your shoulders, and you nod at his old student. “I’d be happy to. Give me a bit to get ready,” you gesture behind you, “and I’ll walk you to your quarters.”

Anakin must nod in return, because you close the door without another word. You reach up to grab your outer robes from where they’re hung on the wall, and turn to him with a tormented expression.

Go, it’s his turn to coax you as he mouths the word silently. It’s alright.

Your eyes are shining with emotion that he can’t quite read in the dim light, but eventually you slip on your cloak and shoes and open the door once more. With one last lingering glimpse at him in the corner, you disappear into the hall where Anakin is waiting.

As he feels your presence dwindling away, he sends a final thought into the vacant room, more to himself and the aching emptiness of the Force than to you.

I love you.

#*DROPS THIS AND RUNS*#rini writes #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi imagine #i'm so excited to finally post this one it's been in my drafts forever #THE DRAMA!#don’t imagine the gif as his face after you leave just DON’T

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informationsorter · 3 years

Text

How to keep yourself safe from fear mongering and misinformation.

I know there's a lot of fear mongering out there, which feeds on misinformation and the common anxieties of those who have (or suspect they have) a disorder such as DID/OSDD.

The first rule is of course, do not trust anyone on the internet.

This includes me.

Fear mongering is when someone spreads fear and/or terror. Usually with a hidden agenda, but it can also be spread by those who don't know any better and who have been caught up in the fear. If someone is describing a terrifying situation (especially one that starts out seeming fine, but gradually becomes scarier and scarier until it reaches dystopian proportions), it is likely that it is just a fear mongering tactic. An example of fear mongering is "Gay marriage will lead to adults marrying children!". It usually involves multiple steps, which start out with a grain of truth, but twist the facts or use false equivalencies to make it seem as though their worst-case scenario is a real danger. The aim of fear mongering in this example is to convince people to vote against marriage equality. Inspiring fear in a person can also be used to scam that person. How many times have you heard of someone getting an official-sounding phone call which tells them they will be arrested if they don’t send such-and-such amount of money to them, or if they don’t purchase giftcards and give the codes to the scammer on the phone? It is the initial shock and fear which cause a person to fall for these. Fact checking is vital.

Fear mongering.

- Take a moment to overcome your initial emotional response. You need to be able to think clearly and logically when you are confronted with something that shocks and scares you. - Try to think about their argument/statement rationally and objectively. Is it likely that in this day and age a therapist would illegally force a treatment on you without informing you of all of the facts about that treatment? Would a mental health professional risk a lawsuit and the loss of their licence by refusing to answer your questions about a treatment that they are insisting on? - Check for sources, and it is very important that you not only READ their sources, but also look for other sources by yourself. The source/s supplied by a fear mongerer will often support their statements and seem fairly convincing, but actually contain very little fact. You need to do an independent search for information which supports their claims, and information which contradicts their claims. If there is no truth to their claims, you will struggle to find reputable sources which support it, and are likely to find many that have evidence showing that the claim is false. (There is of course the chance that something is true but does not have sources for it - eg 50 years ago, there may not have been many official sources supporting the idea that being gay is fine, and there would have been many official sources claiming that being gay was a disease.)

Do not take any one person's word as fact.

- Check for reliable sources that back their statements.

- Look for multiple opinions/input, from a variety of sources. It's no good asking 10 people in the same group for their opinions and then taking it as fact if they all agree. If you are searching for information, you need to take everyone's advice/input/opinion with a grain of salt, and seek a wide variety of people to ask.

- If someone claims that such-and-such is the ONLY possible way to experience something, you should look into why they are claiming that, and what reliable sources they have to back it up.

- If something is really a fact, there will be SEVERAL reliable sources discussing it. Not just one source being reblogged or referenced by multiple other sources.

Check sources.

- Look at whether the person is actually linking the direct source of their "facts" or not. If they are simply claiming that such-and-such says this, or vaguely indicating that a certain government or organisation supports their view... That's not good enough. You will have to actually research it yourself and see whether that is the case or not.

- Be cautious if someone has quoted something but does not tell you where the quote comes from.

- Look at the full quote, not just the part that the person has quoted in their post/statement. It can be easy to take things out of context, and make it seem like the source supports a certain view, when in reality it does not.

- Actually open the links if someone is citing them as a source that supports their statement. It's very easy to assume that because someone has cited multiple sources, that those sources are accurate and relevant. But in reality, it would be quite easy to simply link a bunch of random official-sounding URLs, that actually have nothing to do with it.

Check credentials.

- If someone is claiming to be a therapist, scientist, or anyone working in a medical field, you should not believe them unless you are seeing them in a professional capacity IRL.

- You are

ALWAYS

entitled to see the qualifications of someone who is treating you, whether it is your GP or a mental health professional.

- If someone online is claiming to be a trained mental health professional, but is not treating you in an official arrangement, they should not be giving you in-depth advice or diagnosis.

A mental health professional should always get to know you and your background before giving you advice. THEY WILL NEVER ATTEMPT TO TREAT YOU OR DIAGNOSE YOU WITHOUT ENTERING INTO A FORMAL PATIENT-THERAPIST ARRANGEMENT.

Seek a trusted person to help you fact check if you are having difficulties.

A lot of sources may contain heavily jargoned text, especially when discussing medical conditions/disorders.

Find someone who you know you can trust, and who is willing to admit when they are mistaken. Ask that person to help you.

DO NOT TRUST ANYONE WHO REFUSES TO ADMIT THEIR MISTAKES.

- Watch out for people using gaslighting tactics, or deleting conflicting opinions from their posts. There are some people out there who insist that they are correct, and will refuse to acknowledge any information which contradicts their statements. These people may use gaslighting techniques to supress anyone who tries to question what they've said.

- Any one who is working from a place of good intent, will be open to looking at reliable sources which contradict their statements.

- Similarly, if anyone tries to convince you that you DON’T need to check their sources, or that you can trust them without them providing sources, THIS IS A RED FLAG.

Is it ok to test someone?

In my opinion, when you are searching for accurate information, it is perfectly acceptable to test someone by asking them something you already know the answer to.

For example, when I went to the endocrinologist to talk about HRT, I asked her my most important question and she responded in a way that didn't match what my doctor had said.

So I tested her by asking a question I KNEW the answer to.

She answered incorrectly, and I knew that I would have to work hard to get accurate information out of her.

Here are some sites to help you fact check.

Scholastic.com

has an article aimed at children and teens, which is easy to understand and read. (It was also written by adults trying to use “hip” slang.)

https://choices.scholastic.com/issues/2019-20/120119/howt-to-fact-check-the-internet.html

Wikipedia

has a list of fact-checking websites, which may or may not be useful.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fact-checking_websites

Middlebury Libraries

has a short list of non-partisan fact checking sites.

https://middlebury.libguides.com/internet/fact-checking

And finally, I am aware this is a clumsy post, fuelled by an emotional response.

PLEASE reply or reblog with any information, links, tips, guides, etc regarding fact checking or protecting yourself from fear mongering.

**********************************************************************

This post was inspired by

THIS POST,

which builds on a common fear amoung those with DID/OSDD, and drives people away from seeking help, for fear of losing themselves.

**********************************************************************

Here is what you should do

if your therapist is trying to force you into fusion.

If your therapist is trying to trick you into undergoing a treatment without giving you information, or refusing to give you all relevant information - YOU SHOULD LEAVE IMMEDIATELY AND SEEK LEGAL ADVICE.

Here is a bit more information about

possible end goals you may choose

during therapy.

#did #dissociative identity disorder #actuallydid #actuallyosdd #osdd #actually multiple #actually traumagenic #information did

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kirksfattitties · 3 years

Text

asks you can smell the privilege and internalized ableism radiate from

(tw for ableism and other bigoted implications)

i’m bad at reading tone but even i understand that this is 100% you being condescending and trying to cover it up with smiley faces and false sincerity. and i don’t appreciate that.

before i get into deconstructing your shitty ableist argument, i want to explain the reasons i believe in self diagnosis (self-dx):

even professional diagnosis doesn’t start with a doctor diagnosing you. there has to be a reason for seeing the doctor. some people see a doctor in their adult life because they’re struggling, some people are taken by their parents, some people are referred or suggested that they see a specialist. whatever it is, you don’t just see a doctor and they magically give you a neurodivergency. people have neurodivergencies before they see doctors and even if they NEVER see a doctor.

the psychiatry system is flawed in MANY ways and to say that it isn’t means you’re denying the experiences of people with less privledge than yourself. also like psychiatry isn’t gonna suck your dick. you don’t have to be a bootlicker lol

in many places (hi hello i’m from america where our government tries to indirectly kill us by not providing us with adequate healthcare! i and many other people have many issues we can’t get fixed because simply our government cares more about the economy than us), seeing a psychiatrist or a therapist or going to a mental hospital or WHATEVER is INCREDIBLY expensive. and to assume that everyone has access and enough time/money/energy/transportation/whatever to do all of that is classist and elitist.

ANYTHING medical (including mental health) is biased towards white cis men. most studies are done on white cis men/boys. because of this, people who aren’t white cis men (or people who aren’t perceived as white cis men) are often not diagnosed. the system is racist. the system is sexist. the system is transphobic. people don’t know how to diagnose autism or adhd or personality disorders or other neurodivergencies or even mental illnesses in black people and other people of color, in women, in trans people, etc. and GOD FORBID someone be in multiple (or all) of those categories. saying “just go get diagnosed :)” is a privileged statement to make.

shocker! the psychiatry system is also ableist. if you’re already diasabled (whether it be mental or physical) and you see a doctor about ANOTHER disability? the doctor is most likely going to shoot you down. or at least be weary about someone having mutliple disabilities.

also most people who diagnose are neurotypical. they have never and will probably never experience neurodivergency so they can never fully understand it. they operate off of stereotypes of neurodivergent people and usually only stereotypical behavior of neurodivergent white cis men (which, as i mentioned before, is problematic for anyone who isn’t a white cis man). neurotypical diagnosers don’t know the neurodivergent culture and aren’t trained to recognize very common things (like masking for example).

a professional diagnosis can also be weaponized. not everyone can get a professional diagnosis because there are some neurodivergencies (such as autism and personality disorders) and mental illnesses (like depression) that can have legal and medical respercussions to have in your record. trans people can be denied medical and legal transition for being professionally diagnosed. people can lose custody battles for being professionally diagnosed. a professional diagnosis can be used as justification for taking away someone’s body autonomy (especially if that person is also physically disabled).

a LOT of neurodivergencies also have some type of symptom (or symptoms) that make it difficult to interact with people. troubles recognizing facial expressions, troubles understanding certain phrases and types of speech, paranoid about people, audio processing issues, being nonverbal in an environment that doesn’t accommodate for it, overstimulation, extreme social anxiety, discomfort in new situations, problems with eye contact, and a lot more. because like. for many nd people, interacting with people is very difficult and stressful. and hey. if you want to get a professional diagnosis? take a WILD guess what you have to do? FUCKING INTERACT with people! LIKE?? JEHDJJDKEKKDKDKDS. do you know how many professionally diagnosed nd people i know who made their appointment COMPLETELY on their own without help from a parent or family member or friend? LITERALLY ZERO! and i know A FEW nd people who have professional diagnoses! so if someone has social issues that prevent them from doing tasks like calling and making an appointment, showing up for an appointment, talking during the appointment, etc and ALSO doesn’t have familial or friend support (because newsflash! people who are friends/family of disabled people can still be ableist)? almost impossible to get a diagnosis! plus, the diagnosis process is TIME CONSUMING. not everyone can focus on a task for that long and not everyone can miss work/school for that long.

so those are the reasons i support self-dx. (although there’s probably more that i’m forgetting but i have adhd and it’s hard for me to remember things!)

so hopefully you now understand my reasons for believing in self-dx, and perhaps even you’re pro-self-dx now because before you were just uneducated on these issues and how they impact people who aren’t you.

but in case you’re still anti-self-dx and probably hate already-marginalized neurodivergent people, let’s talk about this horrendous ask (series of asks, actually) that i got sent. i feel like i can feel the self hatred and internalized ableism OOZING from this ask and into my inbox, so thanks for that i guess /s

“Sometimes people who self diagnose can take away from those who are actually nd, even sometimes from themselves.”

starting out strong with the ableism on this one by separating people into “self diagnosed” and “actually nd” people. self diagnosed people ARE actually nd

there’s not a limited number of nd resources. this isn’t a math equation of only x amount of people can be nd because there’s only y amount of resources. more people realizing they’re nd will actually MAKE more resources for nd people and will bring more awareness to being nd

even IF someone self diagnosed, and they go back on it later, what harm was done? they learned some coping mechanisms? they made some nd friends? neither of those are problematic and i think they’re both actually very helpful. i think nt people SHOULD learn more about nd people and stuff because i think that will lead to WAYYY less misunderstandings and WAYYYY less ableism

“There are many people who fake nds for attention,”

hey anon, what fucking world do you live in that nd’s are cool enough to fake having? because i would LOVE to live there. like, i literally had a post about my personality disorder (which i will not be specifying) i had to delete because people were sending my anons about how i was “scary” and “threatening” now that they knew i had the personality disorder i have. last year i left a discord server because the ableism i was recieving from not only the members of the server, but the mods as well. there are very few people i know irl who i tell about my personality disorder, but when i tell people about my adhd, they start treating me different. they infantalize me and make fun of me and use “jokes” about stereotypical adhd behaviors to alienate me and they even TELL OTHER PEOPLE without my permission. i was SEVERELY bullied throughout elementary and middle school for being nd. i have been refused job and educational opportunities as well as literal medical attention for being nd. people aren’t “faking” being nd, and if they were they probably wouldn’t be doing it for long because it’s not something that’s EASY to deal with.

kinda ironic that you’re saying people can’t diagnose themselves but that YOU can tell when someone is faking their diagnosis. that’s both hypocritical and a double standard.

masking exists. if you think someone isn’t “acting nd enough” they’re probably masking because they’ve been fucking bullied and harrassed. also you’re probably basing whatever you think nd is on stereotypes. not every nd person is sheldon cooper lol.

this is a side note but can we talk about how you’re literally just taking transmed rhetoric and molding it to fit nd people? like. you really come onto MY NONBINARY NEURODIVERGENT blog and expect me to validate your recycled “but what about the REAL [insert group] people?” ??? like grow up, elitist. you’re not better than anyone else just because you lick some boots 🥾 👅

“and claiming that self diagnosis (and this is just what I interpreted) is just as valid as professional diagnosis”

it is 😌

the only difference between self diagnosis and professional diagnosis is that a professional diagnosis can also get you medicine. not every neurodivergency needs meds and not every neurodivergency can be treated (at this time or even ever). for example, my pd (self diagnosed) doesn’t have a specific treatment but multiple symptoms of the pd (all professionally diagnosed) have specific treatments and medicines that work, so patients are given/diagnosed with/prescribed those instead. also, medicine doesn’t work for everyone! and sometimes people are allergic to or take medicines that will conflict with any new medicine.

“can really devalue the account of someone who actually has a disorder”

here we go again with that “self diagnosed” vs “actually nd” bullshit. literally just say you hate poor people n minorities and leave lol

someone having a different experience than you isn’t devaluing you, but if you’re the one who always has the spotlight maybe you should use your privledge uplift other marginalized people instead of feeling angry when everything isn’t all about you 100% of the time

“I have a second ask”

i don’t want it

“Plus it can be damaging for a person if they self diagnose wrong.”

how? what if they learn information that they wouldn’t’ve otherwise known like coping mechanisms that help them with their own neurodivergencies? that’s definitely not a bad thing

i think it’s funny that you bring up that people can self diagnose wrong and don’t even MENTION that doctors can diagnose wrong. like. you know. the people who GIVE OUT MEDICINE to people. i think it’s MUCH more dangerous when a PROFESSIONAL diagnosis is wrong. what are self-dx people with wrong diagnoses gonna do? read up on nd tips? maybe smoke some weed? drink some coffee? that’s about all they can do with a self-dx. but if a MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL gives you an INCORRECT diagnosis, they can ACTUALLY fuck you up.

“I was recently diagnosed with PTSD, a disorder which I would have never considered I’d have.”

that’s great about your professional diagnosis! i don’t know you but i’m glad you’re finding out about yourself and getting the help you want and/or need /srs

sorry if this sounds blunt, but honestly i’m not surprised you never considered you could have PTSD. based on your asks, you sound like you have a lot of internalized ableism you need to work through and a lot more research about neurodiversity you need to do. being anti-self diagnosis is a common belief among a lot of people with internalized ableism and a lot of these same people are the ones who have no issue with and even SUPPORT auti$m $peaks. many nd organizations that are run BY nd people (like asan) actually support self-dx.

“If I had of diagnosed my own symptoms and then started treating myself or taking precautions based on my self diagnosed "condition", it could of really hurt me.”

how? taking precautions to preserve your mental health is NEVER a bad idea. i’m not ptsd, but someone i care deeply about DOES have ptsd and has shared a lot of the precautions and coping mechanisms for ptsd with me and honestly they’ve been incredibly helpful. it’s almost as if different neurodivergencies and/or mental illnesses have overlap and that’s why there’s a whole community for us to be able to share these resources and information with each other!

the same person was rejected a formal autism diagnosis because of their ptsd, plus the fact that they’re transgender and the fact they have symptoms of adhd. it’s not really my place to talk about their experience with professional diagnosis, but i’ll send this post to them and allow them to add on their experience in a rb if they’re comfortable with that. but it’s almost as if their experience with the professional diagnosis process was unhelpful, harmful, ableist, and transphobic 🧐 and unfortunately this is a pretty common experience

“Also, by self diagnosing, I devalue the account of a person with the disorder l assumed I had.”

how? if someone thinks they’re nd, they have a legitimate reason for thinking so. either they have another neurodivergency than the one they thought they had, or they’re neurotypical and need to figure themself out and have a need for support. either way, they learned more about the specific neurodivergency, more about the nd community, and more about themself. i don’t see how that’s a bad thing.

if you think self-diagnosed people’s experiences inherently have less value, that is straight up ableism. especially considering that other marginalized identities and minorities have trouble getting professional diagnoses, you might also be bigoted in some other way. or at the very least, refusing to acknowledge your privilege.

“only one more I promise”

i don’t want it

“I understand that doctors are expensive and professionals can get it wrong,”

okay. if you understand this, then dm me your information so i can bill you for the cost of my professional diagnoses, the cost for my therapy sessions, the cost for my medicine, and the cost for transportation to and from all these places. PLUS the cost of the work and school i’ll be missing for these sessions. 🤲

“but self diagnosis can be really harmful to yourself or others.”

nah, you’re just ableist and a gatekeeper lol

“If you feel like you have a disorder, go see a psychiatrist, you may have it.”

[remembers when i went to a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with two major symptoms of a personality disorder and said i had other symptoms of the pd as well but refused to diagnose me with the actual personality disorder because i was a minor at the time and he told me “kids don’t have personalities so they can’t have personality disorders”. i understand being weary about diagnosing children with personality disorders because they aren’t fully developed but this dude straight up told me that i didn’t have a personality. this man literally only worked with children so that means he literally never diagnosed personality disorders. this man was literally just lazy and didn’t care about his patients. this man also refused to believe me when i told him the medicine he prescribed me made my symptoms worse and even made me hallucinate. he ignored me and refused to change my medicine so eventually i just changed psychiatrists and they put me on a new medicine that DIDNT make my symptoms worse and DIDNT make me hallucinate. also i looked it up after our session and apparently ONLY people with my pd and related ones experience hallucinations on that certain medication. it’s almost like his refusal to diagnose me and ignoring my symptoms/concerns harmed me. this man also constantly misgendered me and told me that homosexuality and transgenderism should’ve still been in the dsm. like golly, it’s almost as if being queer and neurodivergent in an extremely conservative state is harmful and dangerous. and that psychiatrists aren’t immune from being homophobic and transphobic and ableist.] but yes :) perhaps i should see another psychiatrist in this conservative state :)

“I don't want to undermine anyone's actual experiences, but it can be dangerous.”

then stop undermining people’s actual experiences :)

no ❤️

“If you feel like something's wrong, go see a professional.”

the whole point of the neurodiversity movement is that there IS no such thing as a “normal” brain, so saying that neurodivergent people have something “wrong” with them is ableist.

💰 🤲 hand it over

“I don't want to offend, I just don't want anyone to get mislead or hurt. :)”

you absolutely meant to offend. you literally said that self-diagnosed people’s experiences aren’t valid and have less value than people who have professional diagnoses

i know more people who have been (and personally have been) mislead and hurt by professionals than by simply existing as a self-diagnosed person

also i want to say that being pro-self dx is NOT being anti-professional/formal diagnosis. i think that people should absolutely get a professional diagnosis (if they are able to without negative repercussions)! being pro-self dx is more inclusive of marginalized people (like people of color, women, lgbtq+ people, people with multiple disabilities, etc). pro-self dx is simply just saying that professional diagnosis isn’t the only option

(neurotypical people and anti-self dx people don’t add anything; pro-self dx neurodivergent people are allowed to add with their experiences if they want)

#asks #long post #nd adventures #ableism tw #sexism tw #racism tw #transphobia tw #misgendering mention #medical abuse mention #not star trek #homophobia tw

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