#clark : *politely* how about u fuck off
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@kxllerblondsent : “i think it's time for you to take a break.” | PROMPTS FOR WORKAHOLIC CHARACTERS WHO PUSH THEMSELVES TOO HARD | Always Open!
Azzy edition
"Aw, see. I knew you'd come around. Caring about me. How lovely" it teases, not at all taking a break or letting go by even one tiny bit. Because it knows that this is what the other is ever so politely hinting at without using the actual words. It makes itself comfortable on Clark's couch, uses the fingers of the body it occupies to trace the texture in a nonsensical pattern, keep tapping away at it in a barely there rhythm.
"I don't suppose you'll be surprised to hear that I don't need rest. Or sleep. Though to be fair, technically, this body does, but you know that too, right" it goes on and waves the other off with a frown, only to end up smirking again.
"Offering him food and coffee to keep him going. Really, ever so mindful. Though I must say, I'm still waiting for the day you offer him a bed. Some rest. A good night's sleep. Boy, he sure could use a break."
Soon, that smirk gets replaced with a curious and amused little frown. It stops drumming on the couch, lets go of it, entwines Lance's fingers instead as it leans forward with much interest.
"Do you take breaks? Sleep? Funny little concept, isn't it. And don't get me started on the dreaming. Do you do that, too? I used to, I think. I mean, that's what their little book says about me, right. The Sleeping Chaos, The Blind Dreamer. So it must be true, huh. I wonder what else it says, what else you know. What else you do."
#kxllerblond#clark tag pending#demons in the halls : aza/thoth#numero 2 cos I have no self control#and clark x az is a hilarious combo tbh#clark : *politely* how about u fuck off#Azzy : no <3
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Like the Outed!Au is compared to Marvel very similarly maybe due to the vein of how being a hero is bureaucratized and politized to a degree. So when the comparison came up my mind went to the home cities of the outed heroes fiercely and desperately standing with and defending their heroes. This due to the fact that in marvel our favorite web-head has always been protected, respected, and loved by the citizens New Year City in return b/c he has help the NYC community in many ways both big and small. Like in the comics Spiderman was about to publicly unmask himself cuz he was sick of being slandered and misrepresented in the media only to have the citizens of NYC come in full costumes and masks and unmasked themselves so when Peter does unmask as promised, you cant trust who was the real Spidey. Like I feel each city would try so hard to keep their heroes bc their heroes protected and cared for them when the gov. whos tracking them wouldn't or can't, in and out of mask. Like I feel Clark was one of the first heroes to exile themselves for safety and peace. At first Metropolis was sadden but resigned bc it got caught up in the thrall of the media frenzy of how can we trust these superpowered citizens to help us and who gave them the right to use the powers. The city only realized too late how intertwine Clark Kent was to Metropolis, from his stories exposing the police brutality and city corruption, that's now on the rise bc mild manner reporter is not there to expose the injustice Superman hears but has to overlook at the moment, to lowered charity work bc there's no one to talk you on your break or walk when u feel down about the state of the world to various small business employees feeling down bc that clumsy guy in a suit and slightly skewed glasses won't be coming ever again to lift your spirts with his antics or talks that always made their day. It comes to a point that city misses their mild mannered reporter that one day online all of the stories of how Clark Kent helped or interacted w/ various Metropolians popped up, only for them to realized how integral Clark Kent truly was to Metropolis, not only as Superman, and they mourn for that missing connection. So when you walk through Metropolis long after the big blue left it feels haunted and resigned even as they are at times visited by the man who left. Other cities with heroes see the tragedy of Metropolis and her hero and shutter at the though of being haunted and marked unsafe for heroes bc it lost not only their hero but their fellow community member. So when the feds from out of town come to the heroes' cities they are given a hard time by citizens misdirecting them, given malicious compliance by gov. workers from that city (Gotham in particular does this a lot), ignored, denied services ,yelled at, or even thrown things at. When reporters from out of town try to get their big piece by going after the younger heroes who may not have the pr training of older heroes and team leaders , they are soon mobbed by citizens of all ages surrounding the young hero just trying to get their food for lunch and told to fuck off in more ways than one. The cities circle the wagons for their heroes bc they are remind of how haunted Metropolis began when her hero left and decided they will show the love and loyalty their heroes showed them before it becomes to late.
Like I understand how heroes would leave the public after being outed and into their own society but at the same time i feel the people of their cities would say "So fuckin what? These people help us, to care of us, protected us, looked for the best in us, gave their all to us and we are not going to let them down when it matters the most." bc people are good and to me it fits the fantasy of superhero comics of if people had the power they would help others for good and in this universe the power of the everyday citizen is to help and protect their hero in return. (Sorry if this is too much and over bearing, I just love the scenario of everyday people helping superheroes in the small but impactful ways they can. And this Au has great potential in that.)
This is very cool and a huge chunk I don't know how to address so I will present your thoughts without commentary
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I was Never Young: A Klaus x Reader fic
Anyways uhhh heres my fic based on the Klaus spin off series!! I made sure not to really spoil anything in the series if u guys haven't finished it yet but it does take place after the series events. there's no smut which is weird for me bc i usually write just smut but like yolo this is where it went.
Klaus had been through the ringer. Los Angeles seems to just be more of the same, so why even leave home? Right, he’d been kicked out and cut off. Well, at least one of those problems has disappeared, he thinks as he pats the ugly little satchel full of money at the side of his hip.
He meanders down the street, no real direction or motive as he shuffles down. The diazepine is starting to wear off, and he’s going to need something to dull the corners of his mind in about an hour. A neon green sign draws his eyes, looks as sick as he’s about to be.
‘Cobra’s’ the sign says, and this one is probably as good as any.
The bar has exactly six people inside of it, he realizes as he pushes the door open. It’s hazy, full of the stale and welcoming scent of menthol tobacco. Perfect, Klaus thinks.
The bartender is a stern looking man, like he used to be a wrestler. Maybe this is what Luther or Diego will look like in thirty years if they don’t eat their wheaties.
There are two other men sitting in a booth by the corner, deep in conversation with one another. They’re boring suits, no one that Klaus could have for company. He’s just looking for someone alive to have a conversation with while he numbs himself. Someone alive, he clarifies to himself. His last friend left for heaven’s greener pastures, which he’s happy for him, but maybe the guy could have stuck around on this plane of existence for a weekend longer.
There’s a couple at the end of the bar that looks like they're on a date. In the middle of the day? Wonder if their spouses know they aren't at work. Klaus laughs out loud, poor bastards.
And then there's you, with your mixed drink, absentmindedly swirling it with your little stirrer. You seem like a safe bet, so his feet drag him over to sit down at the middle of the bar near you. He more or less throws himself into the chair, his feet immediately feeling the relief. He’s still clammy and feverish in the come down, his stomach hurts, but that’s nothing a little booze and sugar can’t help.
You notice the guy as soon as he walks in. Of course you do. After a few years, you start to recognize people even if you don’t know them. You don’t recognize him. He looks paranoid, fresh off a set and worried about what a job will do, for and to him. Poor thing. Probably one of those River Phoenix types. Young, pretty, and overwhelmed. In teen mags one day, in the obituaries the next. All preventable, hundreds of people that could step in if money meant more than the people around you.
“Hey,” the guy next to you greets you, his voice uneven, watery and cautious. His hands shake a little as he pulls a stack of cash out of his threadbare satchel, pulling a few bills from the rubberband holding it together and flattening them out against the bar.
“Hey, yourself. You new here?” He looks surprised as the words leave your lips, but is interrupted by the bartender approaching.
“Yeah, whatever that special is for today, that’ll do,” he orders like he doesn't really know what to do at the bar. He turns back to you, looking ever so boyish and lost with his big green eyes.
“How did you-?”
“How did I know you're new here?” You throw the rest of your drink back, carelessly placing it at the far end of the bar from you, “Because you don't look absolutely beaten down. I mean, you look a little twitchy, but you look fresh.”
Fresh? That’s not at all how Klaus would describe his look, having not slept in days and having been using an extreme amount of controlled substances, even for his standards.
The bartender slides a glass towards him, and he scrambles to catch it. There’s a total of two umbrellas, a flamingo stirrer, and two straws in it. In all, garish and hard to look at. The bartender takes the money, and they nod at each other.
“You look kinda young to be here,” with that remark, Klaus takes a long sip of the fruity cocktail he ordered, a sickening blue color so intense you bet it could substitute as hair dye.
“You do too,” you quip. You’d been working in this town for a few years now, on and off movie sets and bartending clubs with live acts. This boy? He looked fresh. Like he’s just been taken for his first ride. He looked rough and unused to it.
“How old are you?” he asks, he can’t place your age or accent. You look just as young as him, if not younger. You sound southern- Boston- Chicago- western and somewhere European he can’t place. Is that what Hollywood does to people's speech patterns? Is that gonna happen to him? But you seem to be as much an anomaly here as he does.
“How old are you?” you mimic back.
Klaus stares in awe as you rest your elbow against the bar, making sure he sees that as you snap your fingers, a cigarette materializes between them. You quickly shift the rolled tobacco to rest between your index and middle finger, ready to place it against your lips.
“Listen, I’m old enough.” That's all you have to say about that.
“Yeah,” he agrees, “Sometimes I think I was never young.”
You exhale sharply through your nose, the hint of a laugh.
“Yeah, alright.” You fish around in your jacket pocket for the lighter and ask, “Do you wanna get out of here? Only smoking bar in town, but it ain’t got hotdogs.”
Hotdogs, Klaus thinks, He remembers having sausage back home, but he’s never had a hotdog.
“Why are you lookin’ at me like that? You never been to a baseball game or something?”
He shook his head, no. Klaus hadn’t ever seen a baseball game. He knew the history of it, the impact it had on American society. All from a very clinical and academic standpoint. Sports weren’t really his thing.
“Nah, I always preferred activities with a bit more... uh, substance.” He laughs at his own joke, whether you get it or not really doesn’t matter.
“Right, right. So River, what’s your real name?” You talk with the cigarette but between your teeth, lighting it quickly, before the lighter in your hand vanishes from sight.
“It’s….. uh, It’s Klaus.”
You give him your name, and he repeats it, tests the name out on his tongue.
You take a deep inhale, blowing the smoke out of the corner of your mouth.
“So Klaus, wanna buy us some hotdogs?”
You leave as soon as he finishes his drink, and he talks in a way that he thinks might be too much. But you listen. You’re the first living person that’s actually listened to what he had to say since he got here. He asks about you, your story, but he doesn’t get as much as he wants. You like your smoking, you’re a special effects designer, you dropped out of high school to come out here, and you fucking love Alonzo’s hotdogs.
“Hey ‘Lonzo!” you shout, interrupting Klaus mis sentence, raising both arms above your head, the baggy sleeves of your jacket falling closer to your elbows.
“How’s my kid doin?” The man shouts back. A tall man, with heavy brows and a mustache. “And who’s this?”
“My friend Klaus here just directed a movie! With Vivian Clarke, and the kid’s never had a hotdog! Can you believe it!” Your footfalls come quicker, starting to jog as you clear the end of the block, Klaus starts to shuffle quicker to catch up. When he gets to see the man up close. clear chocolate brown eyes greet him. He looks pretty trustworthy, Klaus thinks, Like Santa Claus, or John Stamos. Basically, like anyone but Dad or Viv.
Alonzo asks all about Klaus’ recent accomplishment, not exactly something he wants to talk about, but he likes that Alonzo is genuinely curious and polite. The only thing you say is “extra relish, on both. Big shot director pays.” during the conversation, focusing more on finishing your cigarette and stubbing it out with the toe of your boot. Klaus looks down and the cigarette butt leaves no trace on the concrete.
“So back there,” he says as you wait for your dogs to be handed over, “That cigarette business, are you a magician?”
“Nah,” you say, not fully meeting his gaze, “I’m a Libra.”
You nod at the guy as he finally pulls the dogs over the edge of the cart he operates. Extra relish, just like you asked. When he places the hotdog in Klaus’ hands, the redhead’s eyes go wide. Guess he wasn’t kidding about never having relish, you think.
“Huh,” he starts, dumbfounded by the hunk of grease and meat and relish in his hands, “I’m a Libra too, actually.”
“Guess that’s something about balance or something,” you say, effectively ending the conversation again by opening your mouth as wide as you can to accommodate the sheer mass of one of Alonzo’s hotdogs.
He looks at the meal, his first and probably only for today, and then takes your lead, opening his mouth as wide as he can before finally chomping down on a huge bite of it. The bite is… heavenly. Pickled vegetables and chutneys exploding on his tastebuds, the coolness of it contrasting with the fresh off the grill meat. No offense to mom or Pogo, but none of their cooking could ever hold a candle to this street hotdog.
“Good, yeah?” Your voice, distorted by a mouth full of food, breaks his almost nirvana like trance.
“So good,” he tries to say, mouth just as full as yours. He finishes chewing, swallows with a huge gulp.
“You got any more food spots to show me?”
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Can i request how different idv characters would act as roommates? Eli, Helena, Luca, Edgar, Vera, Norton and Fiona if thats alright with you :DDD
warnings? kinda suggestive, crack fic, cussing
mod toby and mod bread helped me do this fic, its a bit all over the place but it was fun so no regrets
Eli Clark
I feel like being roommates with eli would be pretty pleasant
everything would be clean all the time
he’s the type of kid that everyone wants on their team because of how good he is at everything
so if you scored a roomie like him, you got super lucky
if you left a mess he wouldn’t get mad, he would probably just clean it up himself and leave a sticky note that said to clean up ur mess next time(but not like, passive aggressively)
ofc you would clean up after the cute sticky note, bc who can say no to this bb?
If you don’t clean up tho, brooke rose will probably shit on your hair when u sleep
tbh you’ve always wondered what eli looked like without his eye mask
so one time when Eli was sleeping, you went next to his bed to try and take his eye mask off and see what he looks like.
You took off the mask and found out it was a dummy
a few seconds later you heard footsteps and you turned around
Eli came up behind you and knocked you out with a bat
you two don’t speak of that day.
Brooke kept screeching last night, and you got no sleep at all, so I guess we’re having chicken for dinner
Unless you had a good reason, then eli and brooke prob won’t mind cleaning up after u
I can imagine you going back to your shared room in the manor after a rough match and seeing eli just sweeping the room in an apron and a cloth covering his hair looking like cinderella
“Honey, I’m home!”
basically if you lived with eli, you basically had a husband/mom/wife???
If you came back to the manor, beaten up and bruised from the last match he would prob pester you and nag you
while cleaning up you wounds he would prob say, “You have to be more careful, im always worrying. You’re gonna give your mom a heart attack!”
seriously tho, don’t worry this bb, he would actually have a heart attack
Helena Adams
i think living with helena would probably feel like some sort of kdrama
she might be a bit clumsy and trip over a few things, falling into your arms bc of her blindness
though she might be doing it on purpose
If you moved things in the room without telling her, she would probably get mad
for example, you move the sofa chair a little bit to the right bc you thought it looked better
helena walks in the room, sits down on the sofa chair and ends up accidentally sitting on the sofa chair arm rest instead
resulting in her bottom hurting and a very long talk with you
she got her revenge weeks later
she had asked you to check under her bed for monsters because she couldn’t do it herself
you were teasing her for still being afraid of monsters but looked underneath anyways
low and behold,
she put a mirror there.
will even wack you with her cane if you’re being annoying
Her cane is pretty affective in shutting you up lol only sometimes
“Hey Helena, are you braille? ‘cause i can read you like a book when i touch yo-” *wack* *moans*
helena: ...
you: ...
helena: ...im leaving
you: heleNA WAIT-
One time everyone at the manor was celebrating Helena’s birthday with a piñata, 2 seconds later she was beating the shit out of Luca with her cane
even after everyone’s been yelling that he wasn’t the piñata
One time you and Helena had a staring contest because you were both bored.
She won.
sometimes to get her close to you, you would sit on the sofa chair super quietly and still
And then you’d wait for her to come and sit on your lap thinking it was the chair
and it would work
she would probably sit on your lap for a few minutes, confused as to why the chair felt elevated
and then she would feel your arms snake around her waist
and she would- “whAT THE FUCK- SCREEEEEEE”
she would probably make a cute bird noise and then just sit there, not knowing if she should leave or not
in her head, “THEIR LAP IS SO WARM OH MY GOD WHY DIDN’T THIS HAPPEN SOONER”
in real life, “let go of me you pathetic mortal”
you’d beg her to stay on ur lap longer and she would cave in
but she didn’t stay because she liked you! baka
Luca Balsa
living with luca will probably be the opposite of eli’s
messes, everywhere
inventions, everywhere
at one point though you had a sneaking suspicion he might be a bunch of rats.
you saw him outside crouching beside you guys’ room with a bunch of rats coming out his sleeve and running into a crack in the building
“its for science!”
he’s also super scared of helena
Luca doesn’t like to admit it, but he got his purple eye from Helena after he made a bad pick-up line for the blind.
She’s been chanting “one of us” and threatening to “finish the job” ever since.
he’s basically a big baby that needs to be taken care of
i feel like he might break down sometimes from not doing his invention right, or feeling insecure
but i guess his rats are there to help
but since he had a roomie, he wouldn’t be able to cry on his own
and its a good thing because he doesnt have to do everything by himself anymore
he learns to ask for help when living with you
you’d help him through his episodes and he would slowly start to become more reliant on you
if he was feeling a bit moody, he would unconsciously try to find you to cuddle with
if you lived with him, you’d probably have to be very responsible
luca would have his own bed that he would never sleep in because he wouldn’t be able to sleep without you in his arms
everytime he shifts in bed, you’d feel a tiny shock
it kinda bothered you so
you pranked Luca by touching him with those zappy ring things you’d get from a dollar store.
You just wanted that mother fucker to get a taste of his own medicine
he would basically be a puppy that follow you around, he would constantly old your head
probably refers to you as his
like if you downed a shot that barmaid made for you, he would be like, “EYYYY THATS MY BABy-heurghrhgh”
now you have a drunk baby that you have to take care of
You tried giving luca a shower afterwards, now you know how it feels getting electrocuted.
And trust me, Luca and water do not mix.
good luck have fun
Edgar Valden
living with edgar would consist of
1. edgar being super specific of what was his and what you can’t touch
2. big tsundere baby
3. sketches of you hiding in his sketch book
if you lived with edgar, you’d have to be super patient with his nagging or else you’d have to find a new roomie
he’s constantly nagging you
but if you are tired of it and give him the silent treatment, he’d probably just nag you even more for attention
you need to give this man attention or else
you ignored him for a whole day once because he said something mean
he decided to give you some milk and cookies as an apology
the ‘milk’ was his muddy paint water and the cookies were expired
i feel like one day you two would be arguing about who moved his stuff, your argument being he unconsciously moved his stuff, his argument being you moved his stuff
you guys were so heated up you didn’t notice how close you two were getting
edgar ended up pouncing on you like a feral dog
though when you woke up, you both agreed that you ended up winning the argument
when you’re reading or just doing nothing, he’d ask to sketch you or paint you
i-its not because he thinks you’re beautiful or anything
its just because he thinks that your whole self is aesthetically pleasing and pleasing to the eye- but not because he thinks you’re pretty!
sometimes when he was super focused on his art, he wouldn’t notice your figure slowly approach him
you’d boop his nose and watch as he froze
wh- hoW DARE YOU LAY YOUR HANDS ON A VALDEN
secretly tho, he really loves it when you do that.
like
do it more
please or not whatever
Vera Nair
Vera would probably be a bit anxious when she heard she was gonna get a roomie
but she would do her best to be at her best behaviour
she’s very well mannered and is very polite
she’d kinda be the type to silently care for you
like, she’d notice the little things that bothered you and made sure they wouldn’t bother you ever again
like, if you stubbed your toe alot, she would give everything that you could stub your toe with, rubber covers or socks
but she wouldn’t tell you it was her even though it was obviously her
if you fell asleep on your desk instead of your bed, she would probably but a blanket on ur shoulders and a pillow underneath where you left your head
she’s the thoughtful type
before you went for matches, she’d give you a cheek kiss for good luck
and if you did the same, she would probably play it cool but then panic a second later.
theykissedmetheykissedmetheykissedme-
im sorry this is short idk what to do for her-
Norton Campbell
oh BOY
once norton starts to warm up to you, you guys are basically married
like there was no proposal, just “do you take this man to be your husband- you can’t say no”
he would probably take care of you alot
even when you didn’t need it
i can do it mysel- no
but actually, before he warmed up to you he was pretty cold,
he felt himself growing feelings for you
and he didn’t want to because he was afraid he would lose you and he would have to go through the heartbreak of losing someone all over again
he would leave the room to go hang out somewhere else
he would keep his distance and not talk with you much
but there was this one time where you woke up with him around you, you just pretended you didn’t wake up and relished in the feeling
it took some time, but eventually he warmed up to you
though he still constantly worries about you, he doesn’t want you to get hurt
during matches he would always take hits for you, and just stay closer to you in general
he wanted to make sure you got back to the manor safely, it didn’t matter if he was sent back via rocket chair
he always put you as his #1 priority
he also gets jealous super easily, he’s scared someone will swoop you away from him
so to make sure everyone knows that you belong to him, he’d give you his clothes to wear
not only do his clothes look adorable on you, everyone will know that you’re his
probably pester you a lot if you tripped or got a paper cut
“yoU COULD HAVE DIED” “IT WAS A PAPER CUT”
Once, Norton got stuck to the fridge like a magnet for 5 hours
He’s been using that as an excuse to force you to bring him his snacks every since.
pick up lines are a definite yes
sometimes you’d be shitting and you’d hear outside the bathroom door a faint,
“My love for you is like Diarrhea.” “norton what the fuck im shitting-” “i just can’t hold it in” cue camera zooming in on his face and him smirking into the camera “OH MY GOD WHY”
like Luca, his bed is useless. he always needs you in his arms when sleeping, he wants to protect you and just feel you closer to him
puts him at ease
kisses? hell yes.
if you had to go to a match without him he would send you off with a ton of gross wet kisses on your face ew
He might even try to seduce you into staying
“norton I’m gonna lose morality points!” “fuck your morality points, i wanna smash”
Fiona Gilman
I feel like fiona would probably super psyched when she heard about sharing rooms with you
I headcanon her to be super bubbly and social but when she is alone with her thoughts she’d probably regret everything
“why did i say that why did i say that why did i say that-”
probably prays to god, “please kill me”
she tries her best to make sure you’re comfortable
she doesnt make a big mess and she makes sure she cleans up after herself, overall a pretty cool roommate
except for those times for when she tries to babtize you while you’re showering-
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING” “THE LORD SHALL CLEANSE YOUR SOUL WITH HOLY WATER-” “what the f- iS THIS ALCOHOL???”
this has happened too many times^^^
one time she accidentally created an ultra portal in the toilet.
Y’all still have no idea where it leads, and no intent of finding out.
Although, Kreacher has been complaining of some nasty stuff appearing in his room
i feel like during matches she would always call you with her portals to say hi or just give you a small kiss
it stopped being cute when she went through the portal and ended up seeing the hunter instead of you
mentally scarred from that
sometimes things would disappear in your shared room too, not only the toilet
you’re convinced she has a bunch of hidden portals in the room
like, one time you dropped a pencil and it went through the ground.
you never saw it again
Or you know that missing sock?
Portaled.
i dont know what this turned into
#identity v#identity v fluff#identity v angst#identity v prisoner#identity v prospector#identity v norton campbell#norton campbell#helena adams#minds eye#minds eye x reader#norton x reader#norton campbell x reader#luca x reader#luca balsa x reader#identity v fanfiction#identity v headcanons#headcanons#helena x reader#helena adams x reader#prisoner x reader#prospector x reader#edgar x reader#edgar#edgar valden#painter idv#edgar valden x reader#painter x reader#luca#norton#priestess
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I posted 7,132 times in 2021
8 posts created (0%)
7124 posts reblogged (100%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 890.5 posts.
I added 67 tags in 2021
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Longest Tag: 139 characters
#i also once put a british rock song that’s a bit annoying and very catchy on our playlist and now i’ll just play it and sing terribly to it
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
stop that lie , you liars,coward,misandry, Pro-feminist and communist enough stop now HARLEY X IVY STANS and or eco-terrorist, PAMELA ISLEY admit and accept the humanity ,truth, bisexual and bisexuality for son of krypton, KAL-EL,CLARK KENT ,SUPERMAN or will suffer and die like INJUSTICE 2 threatened to kill eco-terorist ?
Oh was Injustice 2 the one where Bruce Wayne, Batman, and Kal-El, Clark Kent, Superman, had the fight over where to spend the holidays and price limits for the kids???
Just because both Ivy and I get more pussy than you do and recycle ur suddenly obsessed with me.
0 notes • Posted 2021-05-06 03:07:09 GMT
#4
u know u would think a CBJ player wearing a joker suit to the first game would be something I love but dear god does that set off all of my warning bells for cis men.
1 notes • Posted 2021-10-14 22:07:30 GMT
#3
you are not a true fan DC COMICS and yes the political activist and globalist, idolater ,communist AND LEFTIST like JOE BIDEN AND KAMALA HARRIS and SAME thing who idolizes her eco-terrorist, PAMELA ISLEY, POISON IVY the hate office men and humanity and the dictatorship gay and lesbians for sjw and how much shame and disgust I have about you genocide idolater?
bro it’s fucking 2021 why am i getting anon hate??? I just enjoy Ivy and Harley getting married and Batman getting railed by Superman and being a good dad calm ur nazi tits my dude.
6 notes • Posted 2021-05-05 07:06:33 GMT
#2
dc please batman wayne family adventures is literally what we all want please just continue this
92 notes • Posted 2021-09-08 17:41:05 GMT
#1
Scaled this for my iphone and figured I would post it in case anyone else wanted to use it.
119 notes • Posted 2021-09-08 18:55:16 GMT
Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →
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Jealousy - Dick Grayson Imagine
summary: titan!reader have a past with cyborg or whatever and dick is reeeeally jealous (they’re in a relationship) and ignores her and she gets all touchy and needy (maybe a little smutty)
pairing: Dick Grayson x Titan!Reader
Warning: cursing, smut and mentions of fighting.
notes: anony, i’m sorry the delay. I had internet issues, hope u like it xx
When duty calls, you come running.
The Titans were on their way to meet The Justice League after Dick received a call from Clark. The thing was, Darkseid was back and they needed to work together to stop him from destroying earth. Clark decided that they should meet to find a way to do it together.
Bruce decided to send a private jet to take you guys so it would be safer. It was morning when you arrived in Washington and there were already two cars waiting. Dick was driving one to take you, Gar, Rachel and Conner while Donna took the other with Dawn, Hank, Jason and Rose.
“Ready?” Dick asked you smiling resting his free hand on your thigh while the other held the steering wheel.
“Ready” you replied with a smile.
[10a.m, Justice League’s Base, Washington DC]
The base door opened and you got in to see Clark, Diana, Barry allen, Victor Stone and of course, Bruce.
“Diana” you ran to her freeing your hands from Dick’s as the black haired woman smiled to you hugging you back. She was always so sweet to you.
“Son” Bruce greeted Dick giving him a little hug.
The other Titans greeted the league as well. Dick was by your side now with one of his hands on your waist.
“Guys, we called you here to explain the whole situation. Darkseid’s troops were located somewhere on eart, which lead us to believe he wants to invade our planet and take all of it’s magma to apokolips.” Clark explained the titans as they paid close attention to him.
“Son of a..”Jason said.
“Watch your mouth, Jason” Bruce scolded him as he rolled his eyes to the old man.
You laughed looking at Dick, who would normally laugh with you, but right now he was too busy staring at Cyborg with killer eyes.
You felt like an idiot for not noticing sooner. The boy was staring at you ever time since you arrived.
Dick was completely pissed off. You felt his hands pulled you closer by the waist without breaking the eye contact with Victor, so you put your hand on top of his, looking at him trying to say “ignore it” but it was useless because Dick kept staring at him. It couldn’t be good.
You could say Dick was a jealous boyfriend, but never enough to escalate more than just a angry stare, he was too polite for this. But the thing was: you and Victor Stone had a little something in the past when you first got in Titans/Justice League.
He was one of the first heroes you met while you worked for league; you both hit it off pretty well.
You had a lot in common and became good friends even had a one night thing; feelings were never involved but he was a good guy and a good friend.
One week later, Bruce introduced you to the Titans and you met Dick. He trained you and the both of you spent a lot of time together and you eventually fell in love with each other.
Clark finished talking about the plan and the tension between the two boys kept growing, you hoped you were the only one that noticed how the boys were looking at each other.
“So we’ll stay here on earth, receiving and sending information to you guys in Apokolips?” Donna asked Clark.
“Yes, we will need you guys to guard the earth while we go there” he answered Wonder Girl.
“Seems like a good plan, Clark.” You said “Right, Dick?” you asked the boy trying to put his attention on you.
And if it couldn’t get any worse, Victor was now staring back at him.
“Uhm...yeah,sure.” He answered looking at Superman “We’ll give you all the support, don’t worry.” he spoke in a serious tone.
With the plan already made up, the Titans were ready to go back to San Francisco. When you were saying goodbye to the others Dick who was by your side, heard the voice of the only person he didn't want to hear talk.
“It was a good to see you again, Y/n.” Cyborg told you ignoring your boyfriend’s presence.
Dick was quiet, trying to control himself.
It wasn’t some toxic “I’m the only one you can talk to” thing, it was more “You don’t know what he really wants to do with you”.
“Hey Victor” You gave him a half smile trying to be polite.
“You are looking beautiful as ever” he replied. This was too much even for you. You knew Dick was completely able to hold his anger to solve it in home but you couldn’t be sure if he was going to keep it now. How could you even react to this?
You felt Dick’s hands gently pulling you away from Victor and him
“I’m sorry, are you trying to flirt with my girlfriend? Have you lost your mind?” Shit. Dick’s voice raised and the veins in his neck appeared for a second as he pushed Cyborg. Your mouth dropped as you watched the scene, you stood paralyzed and all of the attention in the room turned to the both of them.
Cyborg tried to push him back but he’s stopped by Flash who grabbed his arm to stop him
“Hey, hey, calm down, babe. It’s fine, let’s go home” Attempting to calm him down, your hands were now on Dick’s chest. He kept the same confronting position “Please, Dick” you were looking at him but he was so pissed off that he couldn’t look at you now, he stared at Victor stone with a deathly look.
“I’m sorry man, don’t get me wrong-" Cyborg tried to speak trying to show he didn’t mean any harm, but Dick wasn’t dumb and he wouldn’t take it in silence.
“Cut the bullshit” Dick told him before he could finish the sentence.
He grabbed your hand, walking out of the base, not looking back.
The whole way back home was silent. Dick didn’t want to talk about anything that happened. His eyes were focused on the road and his jaw was clenched, he was furious. You couldn’t help but noticing how sexy he was when he was pissed off.
You tried to put your hand on his thigh looking at him, but you received no answer.
Back in the tower, he went straight to your shared room with you hot on his heels.
You watched him put his jacket on the armchair. He sat on the bed with his elbows on top of his thighs, the annoyed expression didn’t leave his face for a minute and he only got hotter. You took your jacket off and made your way to him without saying a word. His eyes followed you, observing your acts as you stopped in front of him, looking into his eyes.
“I’m mad now, y/n. Not a good time” he told you without looking at you. He was serious about it. That much was obvious. The furrowed of his brows, the flare of his nostrils, and the hard set line of his mouth made it clear.
“I know, babe. Let me help you, okay?” You had lust on your eyes, seeing him angry like that got you all hot and bothered.
You pushed him back to the bed and straddle his legs. You started to unbutton his shirt, giving wet kisses all over his neck -which felt so hot right now- with little bites, and god he smelled so good.
He tried to ignore it and hold himself trying to punish you, but you could feel the bulge on his pants getting bigger. You rolled your hips against his member and he couldn’t keep it anymore. He put his hands on your ass, pulling you closer.
You took off his shirt and kissed him, your heart almost dropped when he switched your positions, he was now on top of you. You let a moan escape as you felt the weight of his body on yours.
“You think I didn’t know his intentions with you?” he kissed you intensely
“He thought he could fuck you good but i can fuck you better" he said in your ear with his voice choked in mix of pleasure and jealousy.
He took off your shirt while he attacked your neck, you unbuttoned and opened the zipper of his pants as the kiss got hotter, caressing his member as he tried to muffle his moans kissing your breasts. He moved away a little to take off his pants and boxers and got back making a trail of kisses from your belly to your lips. You and him were closer than ever, skin on skin. No clothes coming in-between, it was just you and Dick. You wanted to feel that love, the desire, the passion and feel him forever.
He spread your already wet pussy with two fingers, making you moan. He started pumping his fingers with rhythm making you arch your back, moaning softly, you were already coming when you heard his voice.
“Could he make you come like I do?” he looked deep in your eyes, and the only answer you were able to give him now, in your state of ecstasy was nod your head “no”.
He was on top of you again, you pressed your lips against his, looking at his brown eyes filled with lust, he stared at you with hungry eyes. He closed his eyes, placing his hands on your hips,
He thrusted into you deeper than before making you lose your breath for a second, you moaned at the same time and you felt the grip on your hips, moaning louder.
“Shh” he said moving deeper and harder, he moaned against your neck “Tell me you’re mine, you’re my girl” He slowed his moves. Dick was taken by the pleasure and you couldn’t help but surrender too.
“I’m your girl, Dick” You said “Fuck me, please” you begged for more, you needed him and he did it, he thrusted harder and harder, and you both came together.
Your sweat bodies were almost turning into one right now.
“My girl” He said kissing your lips.
#dick grayson#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson x y/n#dick grayson imagines#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson one shot#dick grayson headcannon#dc nightwing#nightwing#nightwing x reader#nightwing x y/n#titans imagines#young justice imagines#bat family imagines#anony#request
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i have decided bc america has changed (for the worse)---so too must clark kent’s backstory (for perhaps the better!)
the majority of farmland in america is owned by corporations or rented out.... so while there ARE still family farms, they are struggling to make ends meet in comparison to government and capitalist backed industrial farms. small family farms make up 21% of production. but small family farms are also supposedly 90-98% of all farms in america, which is a clear disparity. as family farm owners age--family farms are disappearing as there is no one to run them. land is being rented out and sold, and even when family farms have enough income to survive, own and operate---often times this is because one member of the household, or two members of the household---have jobs off of the farm. this is especially depressing as industrial farms pollute more, are less sustainable for the environment, or animals do not provide good jobs for the community, and just kind of suck ass?
i don’t want to write the kind of propaganda you see in beer commercials, u know? if clark existed today he’d have to deal with a lot of shit and so would his family. and i also don’t want to write the depressing story of whats really going on in middle america... so i’m finding an in-between for myself.
i’m taking clark kent and i’m changing his backstory in a significant way----clark was born in ‘80 and was adopted by a small, (always less than 30 people on less than 80 acres) aging polyamorous, interfaith, lgbt+ ecovillage in kansas, four years before reagan was elected. by the time clark came around, most of the members were either gay/trans or too old to have children themselves, and their numbers were dwindling as conservative views swept the nation.
they had one television, and besides the shopping trips into smallville they would occasionally take clark into---his only exposure to the little slice of paradise was that tv, the radio, and the newspaper that everyone tossed around while eating breakfast.
journalism because very valuable to clark in those years. he never felt trapped---the commune was full of spirited debate between aging hippies from all backgrounds who appreciated discourse and loved to argue with each other both lovingly and crankily after a long day of work on the farm---but the outside world felt so magical and strange and alien to him in comparison to the people he loved. still, because of his family, as he grew older, he felt he understood it better than most ‘children.’ which is why when he decided to go to public school in junior high and high school, where he met lana lang---and lex luthor. to explore the world!
his parents all encouraged his inquisitive mind, but moreso---the commune and their family protected each other, and anybody who came to them for help. clark, on the other hand---he could save THE WHOLE WORLD, if he wanted to. and while they assured him he didn’t have to... after seeing how much his family was hurt by the world, by poverty under capitalism, by isms and all the fucked up stuff in the universe... clark wanted to prove to everyone through his writing that there was more to the world than what you see in propaganda. plus although they helped him A LOT with it. clark could still hear people crying otu for help all the time. they didn’t call his name, yet--not for superman. but still. if he heard it, wasn’t it a call for HIM?
clark has 8 mothers who still live in the commune who he all calls ‘ma’ and 4 fathers who still live in the commune who he all calls ‘pa’. he has other people who helped raised him---but these people stuck with him through his entire life and also helped him figure out his powers & his anxiety & his political compass.
clark doesn’t talk about them much, because he knows, just like being an alien, his family is complicated & hard for most americans to understand, even though small communes like this of little families of boomer are technically more real and pervasive in this country today than like? the mythos of american family farmers that pretty much only exist in beer commercials? in general, clark tends to keep people at an arm’s length to be an objective journalist and hero. he takes on other people’s shit. they don’t see who he is beyond superman / intrepid smiling reporter man.
but everyone who knows clark’s secret identity and has come to kent farm gets treated to the most fun you can have with a bunch of 70 year old weed smoking gay and trans ass hippies going ‘wow guess you DO take after your ma and pa after all, huh clark? [wink wink nudge nudge at bruce]’
while clark and his family aren’t AS affected by the profitability of farms as they’re mostly self-sustaining and have money inherited from one of the founding members as well as donations from people who once were part of the commune and have moved on to greener pastures---they still talk about it a lot, bc they’re a bunch of commie farmers that hate capitalism and big business, and also, clark is now thoroughly familiar with all the rest of his neighbors and their families in smallville.
but idk. i got this idea in my head and i kind of fell in love with it lol
this ALSO affects my conner kent because now conner has a bunch of lgbt elders to talk to. no wonder he understands his gender so well smh. even if he DID try to hide it while he went to high school rip
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Time for some more 3 am crackhead thoughts with yours truly. This week's concept is Bruce in super hero themed dresses with thigh high socks no shoes (I'm having a thing against shoes this week idk). Just imagine him laying around the tower with a short dress rising up his T H I C C ass and he's just laying on the couch watching TV. - Monster anon
firstly: I love it!!! thank you so much!!
secondly: You know what this reminds me of? Before I got really into feral Bruce, I had my (dearly beloved) “Bruce Wayne being a thotty Bottom is extremely important to me” tag. Which is a mouthful, I know. But the idea is this: Bruce? Thicc yet Repressed. Brucie? Thotsona.
Waning: Semi-public? Public??? sex? Slight exhibitionism. Clark & his alien anatomy
Now.
-
Have I watched…a SINGLE…DC film that came out in the few years? Apart from SSquad and Wonder Woman (do you know how sad I am that I’m missing BoP because of the whole virus situation?!)? No.
And yet. Jason Momoa is very hot, you know?
So what I’m saying it that when I read that, half asleep, my brain supplied that the person to stumble upon this gorgeous view should be Arthur? For reasons that don’t extend past “he’d slap that ass no questions asked”, to be entirely honest. Which is exactly what Bruce is aiming for, arranging himself on that sofa with that little dress that barely covers his ass, practically arching his back in invitation. Arthur would have to test that bounce and who could blame him?!! Certainly not Bruce, that’s for sure.
(Bruce riding Arthur on that couch and Clark walking in, so Bruce’s first instinct is to push Arthur deeper into the cushions and rest his elbows on the back of the couch, as if practising his splits against the back of the sofa while flushed and panting and wearing a slutty little orange-green dress is something he does on the regular. Clark 100% doesn’t mind and he also naturally very much knows that Bruce has a cock up his ass as they speak, but he’s amused by the show Bruce is putting on for him and decides to stay and entertain his little ‘getting caught’/exhibitionism kink. Bonus if Bruce actually comes like that, trying to talk to Clark while Arthur, who was getting smothered by The Tiddies, is mouthing at his nipples and slowly rocking up into him)
-
But to sweep sleepy-nasty me away with a broom, I do have some thoughts regarding Clark.
-
Because as a concept, Clark is very sweet and polite and chivalrous. In reality, he is all those things, but he’s also a hot-blooded alien farmboy with an intense sex drive. Which means that if he’s confronted with the visuals of Bruce in a dress with the red skirt just short enough that the hem is resting on the curve of his ass and thigh high socks on his thick thighs, he’s going to act.
So he’ll walk up with his usual cheer and be all “Hey, Honey, are you watching something fun? :)” and his hand is on Bruce’s thigh. Just like that. Very natural, very casual. (And he’s not acting. He’s very casual and natural. Sweetheart is wearing a short outfit? Wonderful. Let’s touch him, show him some appreciation)
And Bruce is stubborn. He’s not going to lose(?) this game(which he himself started by wearing a teeny tiny superman-themed dress). So he holds an entire conversation with Clark, as if the hand on his thigh is perfectly natural. Considering it is to Clark, Bruce is really just fighting himself, btw.
But to be fair - Clark isn’t putting his hand just anywhere. He took his warm palm and put it right on the little strip of skin above the thigh highs. High enough to brush against the underside of his ass, thumb now and them playfully slipping underneath the hem of his underwear, letting the elastic snap back at Bruce’s ass.
So that conversation lasts about five to seven minutes before Clark is all “By the way - I like your outfit.”
Bruce, who’s been trying not to grind his cock against the sofa cushions due to the warm hand on his thigh, squeezing him absent-mindedly when Clark’s making a point, goes “hmmm.”
“I just think - I mean, I’m not an expert on these matters, but aren’t you supposed to wear something tiny underneath a dress like this?”
“Tiny?”
“Yes. Not that your underwear isn’t lovely, but I think it lacks a certain - a certain appeal.”
Bruce hums again, then goes on to explain why he’s wearing cotton briefs (they’re best for your skin etc etc). Clark isn’t listening. He’s feeling Bruce up (politely). “That’s lovely, sunshine, but I think it really doesn’t do the look any favours. I think you should better take them off.”
“???” Bruce says, but too late.
rip (hehe) Bruce’s underwear. Torn to shreds to reveal his gorgeous ass.
What I’m getting at is that Bruce in his thotty, thotty outfit is getting tongue-fucked, shaking to pieces on the sofa while the TV is still on.
And Clark, the bastard, will stop out of the blue, pull back, flip that skirt back down as if the fact that one of Bruce’s legs is on the floor, his thighs spread widely and kiss-wet where the skirt is riding up is in any way subtle. Bruce, shaking and needy, has to listen to Clark hold a conversation, his own face pressed into the cushions, hole hot and needy, clenching on nothing as he prays for whoever wandered in to just leave so Clark and his wet chin can get back to work.
Clark, contrary to popular belief, isn’t an asshole. He’s simply polite enough to stop his activities and exchange a few kind words. That’s very nice, actually. And when he notices that Bruce is very needy and very unhappy with that turn of events, he slips his hand back underneath that ridiculous excuse of a skirt and pushes a few fingers into him to make him happy.
Bruce, hole suddenly stuffed, is keening into the cushions.
“Are you alright, Darlin’?”, Clark asks, gently fucking three thick fingers into his hole.
The other person is nice enough to leave shortly after and Bruce is finally, finally getting a proper fucking. Alien twin cocks stuffing him to the brim, Clark and his super stamina fucking him languidly into the cushions. Very hard thrusts, but slow. It’s brain-melting, honestly.
And speaking of brain-melting. Clark at some point realises that he hasn’t seen Bruce’s face properly yet, so he flips him and the dress has a boob window where the crest of el would be. Just. Slick bouncy pecs, nipples threatening to slip past the hem of the window.
At that point, Clark loses the friendly-languid pace. And the sight of Bruce, flushed and panting, with his puffy pink nipples (Clark had to tease them and make sure they’d slip into the window for easier access) and his skirt fluttering now and then, hinting at his cock - that’s just a lot. That’s understandable.
After all that teasing, Bruce comes relatively quickly, and that display (moaning, splattering his cute dress, tightening around Clark etc) sends Clark over the edge as well.
But honestly? In that display? Once isn’t cutting it.
Maybe Clark just goes straight back to teasing. Or, more likely, he’ll be all “thank you so much, sweetheart, that was fun :)”, kiss him, flip his dress back down and leave, only to return two hours later and find Bruce in the same position he was in originally(=as Clark left him). Only now he’s fucked out, languid, drowsy, one leg still hanging over the edge of the sofa so the curve of his ass is almost visible, still a little kiss-slick and definitely well-fucked, judging by the slight bruises.
Clark goes “ah, well, don’t mind if I do” & walks up to do the same exact thing all over again. Hand on Bruce’s thigh, fingers brushing his slick hole right from the start this time, polite conversation. & that’s how Bruce gets eaten out (again) and fucked (again).
In conclusion: dresses + thigh highs + feigned nonchalance…terribly effective combination
(babes it’s 1:41…thank you so much for your horny late night thoughts…they’re an endless delight…I hope you enjoyed this nastiness in return 💝💝
I will also proofread this tomorrow and apologise for any sleep-deprived weirdness in spelling or grammar…thank u…)
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this is an oc masterpost of all my haf-formed ocs languishing on pinterest with their messy aesthetics and unedited blurbs, in roughly chronological order of their creation, plus sorted by fandom. this post is only asoiaf, harry potter, hunger games, and riverdale, cos i have tooooooo many original characters otherwise and the post was getting incredibly long.
(note that i love my ocs but these one’s are not polished or even the final versions of their characters, i just wanted to post them lol)
under a read more, if you’re on mobile start scrolling i guess, sorry,,,
Game of Thrones/A Song of Ice and Fire:
Laeya Targeryen: (child of Rhaella and Aerys Targaryen, born 280 AC - three years older than Danaerys)
Fearful of her impending marriage, Laeya is eleven when she takes her younger sister and flees across the sea to Dorne, hiding herself and Dany with dyed hair and badly controlled magic. As Leia and Dani Sand they learn to live normally. At 15 Leia joins the Royal Guard and secures Dany work as a tailor's apprentice. When she is 17, an assassin tries to kill her in front of the Dornish court and everything changes...
- so laeya straight up has magic, which im considering an extension of the dragon thing dany has - she can control flame and for the disguise uses her ‘inner fire’ to make her eyes white-blue like super hot flames, cos the purple eyes are super distinctive. and then she’s discovered and suddenly politics are happening.
honestly she’s entirely a way for me to remove the child marriage bits of the targaryen storyline (stop marrying off your twelve-year-old baby sister viserys u asshole) - in terms of meta/basics, laeya doesn’t have a fc cos most of my early ocs don’t, and bcs i picture her as emilia clarke with faked dark hair and blue eyes lol
and a quick aesthetic below:
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Kyrra Snow: (child of Robert Baratheon and Maery Snow, birthdate ???)
Kyrra Snow is the eldest natural-born child of Robert Baratheon, current King of Westeros, and daughter of Maery Snow, a Southron (but Northern-born) merchant woman. After her mother realises Kyrra was growing up a little too much like her father in looks and needed to leave the far South before she caught the wrong sort of attention, Kyrra was sent off to travel with her aunt and cousins. She is 17 and heading further north, to Winter Town, when Jon Arryn dies.
- kyrra’s another child of everyone’s favourite asshole king, and she’s got a lot of people after her head, but she just wants to travel and continue her work as a simple peddler. (riiip poor girl) honestly she’s not that developed but yolo -
aes:
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Brynn Stark: (child of Catelyn and Eddard Stark, Robb’s twin sister)
Brynn believes in honour and family, and she is loyal to Winterfell and the North above all else. Likes - archery, embroidery and weaving. Betrothed to [some young Northern lord] to keep the bonds between the Norther families strong.
-i basically made brynn as a contrast to sansa’s pro-southnness and excessive femininity and arya’s anger and desire for swords (relatable mood tho lmao). so brynn is here to mediate, extoll the virtues of both needlework and weapons, make a decent marriage to someone she likes, if not loves, and hold down the fort in the North while shit gets increasingly messier in the South. and a possible faceclaim is Àstrid Bergès-Frisbey -
aes:
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Rosienne Lannister: (child of Joanna and Tywin Lannister, born 273 AC)
Rose is looked at by the realm with dismissal, a consolation prize for her father, a spare daughter only useful for matchmaking, but at least able-bodied and pretty, unlike her brother. After a long betrothal, Rose is married to Willas Tyrell at the age of eighteen, cementing her role as the next Lady of High Garden...
- Rosie/Rose is a bonus Lannister, bcs why not. likes cyvasse and the harp, soft and kind and maternal, powerful in her own way. originally she was from a minor divergence where joanna survives tyrion’s birth and goes on to have another kid, but not sure if i’ll keep that aspect, so for now she’s tyrion’s twin -
and her aes (yes that quote is cropped, no i don’t care rn):
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honourable mentions to my other got underdeveloped got/asoiaf ocs who need more effort before i post properly about them:
Tamlen Storm, a rookery apprentice (working for the Maester of House Tully, managing the ravens) who may or may not be a reincarnated si-oc trying to save westeros,
and an unnamed northern huntress who stumbled into the plot somehow and wants her normal life back (entirely inspired by Keira Knightley as Gwyn in Princess of Thieves, when she’s doing archery stuff and looking v butch).
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Harry Potter:
Taurus ‘Ara’ Lestrange: (child of Bellatrix and Roldolphous Lestrange, born 1978)
Raised by the Goblins after a legal mix-up following her parents' imprisonment in Azkaban, Taurus is good with a sword and aiming to be the next Minister of Magic. She attends Hogwarts with the other magical kids her age, under the fake identity Ara Burke, unknown cousin of a minor half-blood family. When the Potter brat’s drama starts destroying her change at an education just as her fourth year, her OWL prep year, begins, Ara intervenes.
- im tangentially aware that as bellatrix’s kid she’s almost occupying the place of whats-her-name from the cursed child, but considering that i know nothing about the cursed child and don’t care about it anyway, i have elected to ignore this. her actual parent might turn out to be some smitten half-blood from a minor branch of the Greengrass family, or it might actually be Rodolphous, who knows. slightly inspired by the fic ‘Harry Crow’ (by robst on ff.net) where harry is raised by the goblins -
messy aes:
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Valerian Potter: (child of Lily and James Potter, born 1980)
After the Potter twins’ parents are murdered by Voldemort, they’re dumped on the doorstep of Number 4, Privet Drive. Dealing with two traumatised magical orphans, Petunia and Vernon Dursley turn to violence and neglect to stay in control, acting far more harshly than expected. With the arrival of two Hogwarts letters, life gets complicated incredibly quickly. (Self-sufficient and scarred from abuse, Val and Harry are immediately Sorted into Slytherin).
- val’s fic is basically an angst fest, okay,,, -
aes:
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and shout-outs to: holly addison potter, a half-baked reincarnation si-oc (i love that concept a lot, can u tell) and my fav girl thea dursley, who already has her own fic and so isn’t getting a proper spot in this post
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The Hunger Games:
Asher: (District Two, age 18)
[rip no blurb for asher]
-asher is a career from two, who wins the 70th games. mostly im focusing on her recovery and how the games function in two, with training volunteers and mentoring and collecting sponsors, plus eventually the rebellion. lots of the D2 headcanon i have is inspired by @/lorata but i defintely made a distinct effort to have my own stuff, cos where’s the fun in plagiarism -
aes for Asher’s Games:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rowan Everdeen: (District Twelve, age 19)
Rowan will do anything to protect her family. This extends to going to Head Peacekeeper Cray on a cold winters night, charging the most she can get for her virginity.
It extends to Reaping Day, when she steps out in front of the crowd and says “I volunteer as tribute” in the steadiest voice she can muster.
It extends to clawing her way out of the Arena, bloody and exhausted, with blades in her hands and violence kept tucked behind her teeth.
It extends further, to a simple ‘Yes, President Snow’ when he coldly, carefully implies her family might meet with an accident if she doesn’t play the good little Victor (and fuck the people who pay the Capitol for her company).
It extends to joining the Rebellion, to looking President Coin directly in the eye and agreeing to be a Mockingjay, a symbol for the people to rally around.
- another everdeen kiddo! as the big sister, rowan volunteers for prim, and goes through the Games - she’s a healer and a hunter, and a decent enough actor that she can manage interviews and a camera presence, unlike katniss. rowan also pairs well with a minor au i have, where the reapings are spaced out over a week and official training is a longer, giving the capitol a nice, long buildup to get excited and place bets, etc., and giving the poor, underfed tributes from the outer districts a better chance, which makes for more interesting television and better Games -
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Adrasteia Crane: (The Capitol, age 28)
Unlike her big brother, Adrasteia doesn’t want to be a Gamemaker. Instead, she wants to create clothes, artwork, to enrapture the Capitol. She wants to be a Games stylist. After years of design school, of working her way up the ranks, first a PA’s assistant, and then fetching and carrying for Twelve’s prep team, and then eventually on a prep team for the dull tributes from Six, Adrasteia Crane finally has what she wants - the position of stylist for District Three’s male tribute in 74th Hunger Games.
- tbh adrasteia is only seneca crane’s sister because i couldn’t think of a suitable last name for her lmao. i think i’d actually prefer her to be unattached to any major canon players. however, his death is a good motivation for her to join the rebellion, so we’ll see. she’s got a bit of the capitol fashion thing going too, with soft pink hair and diamond-effect skin on her face and shoulders -
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also bonus hunger games content: another oc, Sarsaparilla Verran, from District Eleven, fifteen and alone when she goes into the Games. An orphan, her siblings lost to the Community Home system years ago, her relatives dead or uncaring.
So, Rilla is a wee lonely bab tbh. she did not want this, unlike most of my other hg ocs, and she’s not excited for weeks of murder. she just wants her family back, but since that isn’t possible, she’ll build a new family instead. and uuhhhhh, spoiler alert, she dies before she can have this ://///
and my hunger games aus - a canon divergence where katniss joins the careers instead of peeta, her desire to go home to her family outweighing her reactive hate for the concept of training/volunteering to kill other teens, and a fem!Haymitch au where she’s a little wiser to the dark side of the capitol before she commits acts of rebellion (she still rebels anyway tho, just smarter).
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Riverdale:
Cat Cooper: (middle child of Alice and Hal Cooper)
Cat Cooper (17) is the black sheep of the Cooper family. Her piercings, brightly dyed hair and connections to the Southside Serpents make her the odd one out among her sisters and constantly at odds with Alice Cooper. Cat’s life is occupied with her Serpent friends, work at a local coffee shop, and training - martial arts, supplemented with cross country, gymnastics and swimming. Until her older sister is shipped off to places unknown and her baby sister starts getting caught up in murder investigation with the absent Serpent heir...
- haven’t decided between Catelyn or Catherine for Cat’s full name lmao. she used to be Kit, actually, but I changed it cos i prefer Kit to solely be my divergent oc (kit serafim). Cat is an ADHD disaster who loves her sisters and her friends and wants to get the hell out of Riverdale on a sports scholarship (she does either boxing or karate mainly, need to figure that bit out) -
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Georgie Andrews: (child of Mary and Fred Andrews)
Georgie likes soft drinks, cheerleading, and hanging out with the Blossom twins and Polly Cooper, their closest friends and a welcome distraction from their own problems. After Polly and Jason vanish, Georgie’s support system is almost gone, and they has to deal with everything they’ve been bottling up, just in time for Fred Andrews to get shot.
- also just angst ngl. so georgie’s gender is basically ???, they enjoy cheerleading and not much else. they spend half their time dealing with depression, by trying to ignore stressful/hard topics and focus on the good side of everything. this isn’t a great long-term coping mechanism and has the fun side effect of pissing of the people around him when she seems unable to be serious or empathetic to someone else's pain (bcs she’s too busy deflecting for the sake of her own fragile mental health), so it gets fun when fred is shot and archie starts getting in too deep with the lodges -
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Sera Thornstone: (parents ???)
Southside Serpent. Going to the Riverdale Community College and running errands for FP Jones. And secretly meeting up with her Ghoulie lover down by the Sweetwater where nobody goes.
- everything about sera is vague and undecided lmao. but she has a ghoulie gf/bf/nbf? and they’re hiding that they were down by the river on the 4th of july, cos a serpent is an immediate suspect. going to community college to work on getting general credits before saving up for fancy school for law or journalism. the aes isn’t entirely accurate cos sera’s built from the remains of another serpent oc who i scrapped (she does have a baseball bat tho) -
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and honourable mentions to jen johnson and octavia blossom-murphy, my other riverdale ocs who actually have content, plus an in-development unnamed oc who gets adopted from the soqm by the Muggs family and growsup with Ethel.
and my riverdale role reversal au, which i will never write but have some nice aesthetics for under the tag wip: bughead role reversal au.
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all my mini-aesthetics here are unsourced images/from pinterest. any similarities to other people or characters, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
alrighty that’s it. now i have to tag this behemoth argh
#ocapp#ashandrustediron ocs#ashandrustediron edits#i say edits#i mean neatly cropped screenshots#lmao#fandom: harry potter#fandom: the hunger games#fandom: a song of ice and fire#fandom: game of thrones#fandom: riverdale#ashandrustrediron writes#time to tag the ocs who will actually get content later#oc: rosienne lannister#oc: tamlen storm#tam actually has a fic outline unlike most of these other westerosi ocs lol#oc: ara lestrange#oc: asher#no last name bcs volunteers from two don't have last names#they belong to the capitol and their district#<- fun fact about that fic i guess#oc: rowan everdeen#oc: adrasteia crane#none of the riverdale ocs will get a tag bcs i already have riverdale oc fic im working on#long post#long post cw#oh and some warnings for the stuff brushed upon in the blurbs i guess#gender dysphoria#violence#child marriage
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Unpopular opinion: god, Batman v Superman had some really good ideas that it chucked down the U-bend, and there are parts of it I really enjoyed. I don’t regret seeing it (and yes, I watched the Extended Cut. All three hours). I was just discussing this with @masutrout, and here’s a slightly abridged version of my thoughts.
Look, I know no-one sets out to make a bad film, and with so many moving parts, a film getting released at all is a miracle. I know it’s not down to one person and (I’m quite glad) it’s not up to me, because I have no idea how to make films. But if I had, say, a magic lamp and a wish for an ideal BvS and DCEU in general... Here’s what I liked; here’s what I’d magically tweak in a parallel universe; here’s a rant. A 2.2k rant. An Extended Cut rant.
I know it's all desaturated and so on, but I genuinely really love Snyder's style. Dude can set up a shot, and he knows how to use chiaroscuro. In theory, I totally get why they'd look at him and go, "his shit is like comics brought to life, pick him." I wish he'd just... allow a bit more colour into it and let people colour grade properly, because the Metropolis/Gotham Clark/Bruce contrast could've been played up beautifully with visual language and colour too. I mean, I know he can do overwrought iconography and imagery, look at how they went to the trouble of CGI'ing Clark's cape in every scene because it was such a banner, and the pop of red.
I'll admit, I wasn't always all-in on Affleck's performance, though it was one of his best in his back catalogue (I am one of the few people I know who has zero problems with him as an actor and tends to find it more the material, but I grew up on Kevin Smith films and his shtick works for me, even if he has a manner. I'm not too discerning). But. A Bruce who's tired and broken-down and greying and has lost even more, and still in the aftermath of that, tries to find hope and "I can't let this happen to anyone else" again, in the wake of one more death? God yes give it to me. A Bruce who's taller than Clark and just plain tall in general, because maybe Kryptonian ideals are different and because it'd give Bruce one more thing to desperately play down? God yes. Just... in general, middle-aged Bruce but without a lot of the Batfam stuff (which I like, I have a love for several of the Bats, but my favourite stories are always solo) with a regimen of painkillers and who's turned Wayne from an "I'll just jump into the water feature" jackass to a schmoozer and flirt and maybe a drunk. Take out the branding. I wanted Bruce as a broken idealist, not a fascist. It's actually way more fascistic than the original Dark Knight Returns, even. But goodness, the whole idea of an established, tired Batman is good. There’s a reason the comics and animations keep coming back to it.
"Superman was just a story. Superman was just the dream of some farmer from Kansas." I forget the exact phrasing, but everything about that idea, and this idea that Superman is as much an ideal for Clark to live up to as everyone else, and he’s daunted by it? Yeah. There’s something in there.
I loved everything about Jeremy Irons' Alfred. Seriously, everything. Tech guru, little less RP, little rougher around the edges, clearly has some scars of his own. Absolutely biting, even more than most incarnations, and gets all the best lines. Yes, keep that, it'll do.
I liked the voice changer... halfway. To me it makes way more sense than putting on a voice, which is a bit daft and way more variable. I just wouldn't have gone that heavy on the processing, so that Bruce sounded less like a hacker from 1999. I also thought it was a good way of representing how Bruce desperately tries to emotionally distance himself when he’s the Bat, and how his anger has made him colder.
Batman as just a rumour or an urban legend is great, and a wonderful contrast to Superman, who’s this bright, transparent... common god. Bruce never did it for credit, he did it to get it done. It’s stretching the bounds of credulity, sure, but in this strange, semi-operatic storytelling with heavy myth feel, it makes a bunch of sense thematically.
Bruce meeting Martha Kent, and their first meeting being him saving her life. Even this broken-down Batman who thinks he’s a mess. Actually, just more Martha in the DCEU in general. I mean, I get why they didn't lean into it so much because they maybe wanted Bruce and Clark to feel more like equal peers, rather than Bruce being too dadly, but... god, again, more Martha. In JL, in something, if nothing else. Martha who's lost a son (Jason); Martha who later has a son in another city trying to do good and is worried as hell about them (Dick's canonically in Bludhaven PD at this point); Martha who is one of about five people in the world who knows who Batman is and hasn't spilt that information; Martha who saw Bruce at the cemetery and might have some really interesting things to say to him, angry or forgiving; Martha who is one of the few people who's seen the good in the Bat (when Bruce himself couldn't)... Man, I was so, so glad that fic leaned into that. I would read a regular comic book of just Martha and Bruce Being Reluctant Friends and Worrying A Little About Their Kids, But Maybe In An Enemies-To-Friends Way Because Holy Shit You Had A Fucking Spear What the Fuck.
No, really, wait, I’m going to go on about Martha again. The scenes in BvS where she was basically saying, "God, don't kill yourself for them, come home, if they're gonna hate you they don't deserve you..." On the one hand she could've been a contrasting voice to Jon, but this way also makes sense. "I know you want to help but please don't kill yourself..." It was always both parents in the comics who affected him equally, even if the Donner films had his father's death, iirc. It was Martha who pushed to keep him, Jon who taught him not to break people and show off, Martha who taught him how to cook and be gentle with things and in Superman: Birthright, which MoS is heavily, badly based upon (I love that miniseries, time to read it again) she researches alien sightings in the hope he won't be alone. I get why they went for a more "grounded" Kryptonian uniform thing, but Martha made his costume, in the original canon. In all canons, she was a huge help in creating the "Clark Kent" persona (yeah, sure, maybe a woman would have something to say about making yourself quiet and shrinking in a room and having to look helpful and nonthreatening all the time, but Snyder and Goyer were never gonna be the kind of people to explore that and even Waid, whom I love, barely touches on it). Every other film or comic book is crap, dead, or crap and dead dads. Clark's relationship with his mother and father is hugely important.
Getting to see Bruce doing the society beat, and just a little more philanthropy would've been great. You don't have time to build that character? Sure, OK. Take out the Flash dream sequence and the sleeping-with-random-women, maybe don't have a totally unnecessary but kinda hilarious shower scene, and replace it with some identity weirdness where Bruce and Clark are stuck interacting as civilians a little more. Or something about what the hell happened with Jason and the manor, though I don't mind most of it being unexplained. There, still building character, still serving a purpose, you can fit a brief scene into your three hour movie. Civil War had a ton of "Steve Rogers and Tony Stark brood or sit in rooms talking to each other."
If they were going to throw away all the secret-identity potential, they could at least have done it interestingly. That scene at the gala made it clear how hard they both had to act, and Jesus, the idea of Clark eventually, finally finding someone else who has to lie and cut off what they can do, who has to bumble almost the way he does... That could've been interesting and also maybe worried the shit out of him. Or made him want to talk to this crazy billionaire who goes round combat-booting people in the face and try and get what his deal was, which could've led to more interesting misunderstandings.
And then there's Diana, who's not a bumbler but a "nothing to see here, rich eccentric" type too (no wonder she and Bruce had weird insane chemistry in that "sizing each other up/I know exactly what you are" way), and why the hell does Clark basically never see her? I actually don't mind the whole "she's only here for her photo and never meant to get involved, so she's only needing to chase Bruce," that makes sense, but after Doomsday?! In Justice League?! She understands what it is for the world to be frightened of you, resistant to you, the urge to go and hide where it's safe with your family, the loneliness. I mean, just imagine MoS!Clark meeting her and the goddamn relief of it. And the way it could've played off the whole Jonathan Kent is a creepy "kill em all" weirdo now thing, if they insisted on keeping it.
Similarly, please god please show Clark being a journalist more. Perry chewing him out more. A mild hint of office politics. That's the perfect place to leaven a rough film with a dose of humour. People wouldn't have been so bothered by "Is she with you?", which is actually not that terrible a line next to some Marvel "zingers", except for it being so tonally inconsistent. A gentle thread, a few moments of it. Maybe have Clark save someone and have to scrabble to keep his identity a secret, like in MoS - maybe a minute, you could go for some physical humour or a mild sight gag. Obviously, this'd be pre-bombing the courthouse. Relatedly...
Take out Nairomi and the branding. They serve very little purpose, story-wise, basically never come back into the plot, and only serve to make Clark and Bruce look like dicks unnecessarily when if you want to inject flaws, you have a ton of opportunities to do it with how they deal with people and their loved ones, how they deal with perps, and their brooding moments.
Seriously, Bruce kicking the shit out of people and investigating shipments from the Black Zero and World Engine crashes would be enough to worry and piss off Clark, as would the whole "I am the night"/lack of transparency shtick. I mean, for a start, John Byrne retconned their first meeting that way in the 80s and that issue is actually great (Clark is trying to arrest Bruce when they meet, because he's young and idealistic and maybe a little up himself and he's been Supes for about five and a half minutes). Look: Clark is being revered and hates it. He blames himself for Black Zero, at least a little. He has excellent reason to be desperately projecting brightly-coloured not-a-threat and also hate that someone else is terrorising a city and violence is being revered, especially when Metropolis and Gotham are still so raw. I mean... Snyder and Goyer did the fucking stupid offensive 9/11 comparisons. Look at how that affected people and still does to this day; emotions run bloody high, and the entire point of Clark is that he's still human and terrified and guilty. And with Wallace O’Keefe and all the threatening notes... look, there's already a good plot in there!
Meanwhile, Luthor clearly knows Bruce has been sniffing around the K shipments and could've just tipped off Clark about that as well, saying, "He clearly is gonna use it for his own power, and with how sinister and opaque and violent he's already been, he's gonna hurt people." Having his heritage used against people is one of Clark's worst nightmares, it was implied pretty clearly in MoS, and you'd still have the righteous anger. No branding needed. Kryptonian artefacts and the entire masked violent vigilantism are already enough "this is someone who thinks he's above people and can decide their lives" to piss Clark off. He could even investigate that as himself rather than Supes. You need it to be an unanon tip-off and Keefe wouldn't have access to that information? Sure, OK, just filter it through Mercy Graves and make her a "worried confidential source." I mean, she's in the movie and completely wasted. Why not actually, you know, do something with her? Clark wants to believe the best in people, and he might dislike Luthor personally, but he doesn't know Luthor's out to get him yet - or wouldn't, if the writing was better. Again, Birthright, the text Goyer repeatedly ripped from, did this brilliantly. The brand... it's overkill. Grimdark overkill.
I actually... look, I had a really fun, if baffled, time with this movie, but goodness I’d like to see what it could’ve been. And now all the film sites are waving goodbye to Batfleck again while running DC retrospectives due to Birds of Prey, and Cavill’s blue tights are in doubt, it seemed like as good a time as any.
#tru goes dc#batman v superman: dawn of justice#batman v superman#bvs critical#but also kind of positive?#i'm trying to be positive here too#dceu#dc#meta#ie me rambling
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the larger courier six verse, media influences
tagged by @sybil-writes ty
the bibliography for this thing is extensive. my taste is wide and omnivorous. i try to drop what i was thinking about when i wrote a particular bit into the author’s notes, and i think i’ve credited all the direct references, but I consume a lot of dystopia and post-apoc media and harder scifi/fantasy with rules, and i don’t keep an accurate running list of shit I like, so i’m certainly not going to get everything in one post. this is mostly me looking at the very limited number of books i have with me and frantically looking at wiki lists like “yes read that liked that stole that”. if i link everything i will die. if you have trouble finding a specific thing lmk tho. this feels real goddamn pretentious like Ah Yes Look At The Media I Have Consumed but here goes
music: one of these days I will drop links to the network of playlists I have for these kids, but they’re all of Spotify and not super accessible. Danger Days, a post-apoc desert graffiti/neon/cars album by My Chemical Romance. the soft, nonsense love songs off Pretty. Odd by P!ATD. the poppy but sad neon bullshit of Too Weird To Live, Too Rare To Die also a P!ATD production. Wasteland, Baby! by Hozier, specifically Talk and Dinner & Diatribes. Halsey’s cover of I Walk The Line, Rihanna’s Desperado. Everything by Orville Peck but mostly Roses Are Falling and Take You Back (The Iron Hoof Cattle Call). Instrumental stuff: the opening to Silverado, the Billy the Kid musical, bits of Lawrence of Arabia. It’s Been A Long, Long Time. Fitz & The Tantrums’ Get Away. Mother Mother’s album O My Heart. Gorillaz’ Plastic Beach.
filme:
the Dollars trilogy ofc
the sheer bullshit nonsense of Wild Wild West and Blazing Saddles and Turbokid.
a lot of the interaction between many characters in a tight space from Stagecoach. my dad really loves John Wayne, so I am constantly thinking about Monument Valley even though that’s nowhere near the Mojave. honestly whenever i’m thinking about how to describe landscapes I’m thinking about The Searchers, even though I have a lot of problems with that film.
the colorful nonsense future of The Fifth Element.
the gritty self-surgery and prospecting of Prospect (2018).
SO much Trigun and Cowboy Bebop, for space western flavor and the same sort of analog-cassette-future. u kno how everything in Star Wars looks like it’s been there forever? the absolute opposite of a slick Apple future? that.
god I wish Firefly was...good
Akira, bc every time I think about motorcycles the Akira motorcycle slide gif plays in my head.
speaking of which probably a decent chunk of Adventure Time, esp the Super Porp episode.
a smidge of how a platonic trio works from Samurai Champloo.
anything with a big sprawling market and a chase scene, even though the only things I can think of are Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets and the first Indiana Jones. oh Skyfall also
the set dressing from Tank Girl
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow. look I just really like airships and retrofuturisum but art deco
honestly a lot of Ghibli- the aviation fantasy of Porco Rosso, the gardens from Castle In The Sky, a lot of Sophie Hatter energy from Howl’s Moving Castle, the underground bits in Nausicca, the otherworldly sea from Ponyo (except the Fallout sea is probably much emptier). the lovely homey-ness and gadgetry of Sherlock Hound.
almost certainly some Metropolis for how I think about cities
thinking a lot about The Incredibles and earlier James Bond movies recently for that sort of sleek but still small physical gadget spycraft 60s bullshit
the team and found family dynamics in Leverage
The Man From U.N.C.L.E. the more recent film which I have stolen ENTIRELY too much of the Angel + Blondie + Six dynamic from
mad max: all of them, to some extent, but a lot of Fury Road. I have a theory about how the Dollars films take place in reverse order, bc of how they feel next to the Mad Max films. The first Mad Max film is about a specific person in a specific place and time doing really specific things. it feels like a movie made off the info of someone who was there. GBU also feels like that- it’s really place-specific in a way? The second Mad Max film is a little hazier, and focuses on mostly people trying to accomplish a goal. For A Few Dollars More also feels a little hazier, like it’s a little more metaphorical/a morality tale and it’s being told by someone heavily embellishing secondhand events. the third Mad Max movie is just over the top nonsense. feral children living in the wreckage of an old plane escaping in a working plane? sure. why the fuck not. For A Fistful Of Dollars also feels like this. of COURSE this big bad gunslinger drifts into town and escapes in a coffin and invents the bulletproof vest. why the fuck not.
books: i like shit that goes beyond the wander/scrounge/defend trio of verbs.
the trying to wrap your life around a huge unknowable event from Roadside Picnic,
too much Le Guin and Butler to really fit here,
god if anything i write ever has a tenth of the flavor of Kill Six Billion Demons i’ll be happy,
the postwar feel of Vonnegut and Heller,
Margaret Atwood’s biopunk Oryx and Crake trilogy
the incredibly sad decaying biopunk/mutation/last days novelette The Drowned World by JG Ballard.
the space-opera political machinations from the Ancillary trilogy by Ann Leckie.
World War Z’s accounts of survivors has always felt like reading terminal entries from Fallout games.
Philip Reeve’s Fever Crumb trilogy, for its interpretation of high-tech artifacts and archaeological reinterpretation of those artifacts.
Tales of the Bounty Hunters. Tales from Jabba’s Palace.
A Canticle for Leibowitz of COURSE.
the original three books in the METRO (2033, 2034, 2035) trilogy, for their tight dense locations and resource management and life-threatening travel/exploration.
the Family Trade comic by Jordan & Ryan, for setting and intrigue and a very unorthodox power source
Elizabeth Bear’s short story And The Deep Blue Sea, about a different kind of courier.
how Gibson’s The Sprawl trilogy (a trilogy i have MANY opinions about, not all of them positive) does worldbuilding when it implies a vast sprawling richly imagined world with casual in-universe references that you can extrapolate a lot from.
The Gernsback Continuum, for making me think about stranded architectural bits that survived
a little bit of the Empress’ energy from Cavendish’s The Blazing World.
the short story The Rational Ship by Caro Clarke, about a ship that runs on orgasms, from the EXTREMELY out of print Memories and Visions: Women’s Fantasy and Science Fiction edited by Susanna J. Sturgis. i’ve scanned it in as a pdf and will send it to anyone who asks. the stories in this volume are WILDLY varying in quality and terf-yness. i would not buy this book on purpose.
i think each separate Vault storyline is a tiny separate Lost World story, so just pick your favorite and insert it here.
Westerfeld’s Leviathan trilogy was FORMATIVE for baby me. biopunk! big trans energy! SKY WHALES
fucking hate Paolo Bacigalupi for what he does to his female characters but Ship Breaker was good from what I remember of it
there are three very oblique Sherlock Holmes references in “blow a kiss, fire a gun” for my own amusement.
Fallout scifi seems to be very Verne and Wells and Burroughs derived? a lot of very pulpy “pseudojournalistic realism to tell an adventure story with little basis in reality.” or “hey look at this COMPLETE NOVEL i found in a bottle by the sea OR locked in my weird great-uncle’s things, i shall retell it to you here”
idk i think The Road and the Hunger Games have so profoundly shaped the state of the genre, there’s probably at least a little bit of both these things in here even if I didn’t particularly like either of them. There’s also a lot of super bleak post-war stuff I read but am not necessarily incorporating, like Nevill Shute’s On The Beach. probably some Dune in here too if i’m being totally honest. why have a desert if there’s not going to be a giant worm, Fallout: New Vegas???
jesus i gotta read more lady authors. there are probably way more that i’m not remembering bc almost all the books i own are in a storage unit seven hours away that i haven’t touched in three years. there are probably way more comics also.
OH not a book but the decaying-rich-people-paradise of Bioshock. pity how they never made a third game
#ain't that a kick in the head#ty!!!#this was really interesting to think about#i'm not sure i answered it Right bc there's probably a way i could answer this more directly and draw closer parallels to shit#but here we are in an imperfect week with my imperfect brain
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so I saw Frozen 2 for the fourth time
i have so many questions.
there’s a relatively negative (and very long) review beneath the cut so pls read at your own risk. and, of course, spoilers.
I’ve seen Frozen 2 four times now and yikes. I’d kinda hoped it would get better with each viewing, but it’s somehow worse??? I really loved the first movie; it literally changed my life in an incredibly drastic way (don’t ask) but it had been very important to me over the past six years, and...I’m so disappointed.
My initial reaction was disappointment, and I should’ve stuck with it. Like, wtf was that? But some parts were also really well done? It left me so conflicted lol
PROS
Vuelie was a good way to open the film; I quite liked the nostalgia :’)
The intro scene in general was good; I liked seeing more of their parents, although idk what their father was thinking telling them such a tale before bed lmao seems like some shit my mother would do
All is Found is my favourite non-depressing song in the movie, and it opens it beautifully. ERW has a wonderful voice.
The animation really is beautiful; it looks so realistic. Specifically the clouds and the one scene of the waves crashing over the pine trees. It looked amazing!
The music is good but not great. FTFTIF is my favourite; it’s so catchy and cheery. I really liked TNRT, and SY is perfect, but these songs just weren’t as catchy as the ones in Frozen?? I’m thankful for AURORA tho, that was a lovely gift.
Bruni was absolutely adorable (even tho he was an obvious cash-grab for merch lol), 10/10 love Bruni. Bruni + Elsa = even better.
Anna looked absolutely breathtaking throughout the entire movie; the redesign they did animation-wise really works in her favour, and now she’s rocking those Emilia Clarke eyebrows which is a hell yes from me. Her final look gave me all the feels; I can’t say I’m a huge fan of the dress and hairstyle?? it seemed a bit too not Anna, but at the same time, it showed her growth and maturity and I’m very happy with that.
As dark as it was, the shipwreck scene was beautiful. It was handled beautifully; their reactions were devastating. There is a huge con here, but I’ll save that for later.
The ocean battle was really neat. The water looked so good, and Elsa looks good wet???
The whole scene in Ahtohallan was well done; I liked the memories. I wish Anna had been there; she deserved to see her history, too, and it wasn’t fair that Elsa got that spotlight once again.
Everything after Elsa freezing was absolutely breathtaking as well. Anna’s reactions, the song, the scenery-- it was tragically beautiful.
Kristoff had the two best lines in the ENTIRE movie: “I’m here. What do you need?” and “It’s okay. My love is not fragile.” It’s so rare to see a good, supportive relationship in tv/movies, be it heterosexual or homosexual, it doesn’t happen. It’s so rare. So this was a beautiful break from that; the faith he had in her was amazing. Thank u. the real mvp.
The scene with Anna as she accepts the fate of her future; as she takes in a breath and realises/accepts that her home is gone, and her blood family is gone. Everything about it was perfect. You could feel her emptiness. Poor baby needed a hug :(
I liked that Kristoff also hugged Elsa when she returned; it showed that they were friends, which is really important for Anna tbh
I think that’s it for pros??? Now for the cons.
CONS:
Gonna start this off simple: the plot was weak. This is unfortunately not an unpopular opinion; it made no sense. It was too convoluted to the point where nothing was explained.
The pacing was off, and it was ridiculously anti-climactic. The layout in general seemed a bit weird tbh I could definitely sit here and justify all of it, but I shouldn’t have to.
They gave us no reason to gaf about this voice that Elsa was hearing. How long had she been hearing it for? Why was she so drawn to it? Why didn’t she think she was just hearing things? Or maybe she did at one point and then realised she wasn’t crazy?
There was almost no character development. Elsa was the same as she was in Frozen, but this time, it was just annoying. She never learned or grew. Anna was demoted to a clingy side-character even though she’s the protagonist; I have no words for how frustrating this was to watch. I miss the Kristanna bickering. I liked their dynamic overall; I understand their insecurities and lack of ability to communicate because of it, and I liked how non-toxic they were. Overall, they did love and trust each other; they believed in and supported each other, even though they had a falling out (again and again) and were separated for most of the film (again, wtf?) EA had no development together, and honestly, they were annoying asf as a duo. There was no communication and no understanding. I will say that Anna’s fear and frustration throughout the entire movie was absolutely 100% understandable and sensible; she’d already lost too much before, and wasn’t prepared to lose anything else. I just wish she’d been portrayed a bit differently??? And it would’ve been nice if Elsa had stopped for, like, two minutes to be like, “hey, are you okay, you seem clingy and worried” but instead she just kept running and didn’t gaf.
It was over dramatic for the sake of plot, when it didn’t have to be. Elsa didn’t have to continuously try and push Anna away “for her protection.” They absolutely could’ve done the vast majority of things together. Fuck, they could’ve gone to the dark sea together. Anna could’ve stayed on the beach while Elsa tackled the Nokk. Then when Anna saw that Elsa was perfectly capable of protecting herself, they could’ve parted ways then and done whatever it was they needed to do. Or, Elsa could’ve taken Anna to Ahtohallan?? They may have discovered there that Anna couldn’t enter, but then they’d be given the opportunity to communicate, and Anna would’ve at least been included, since this was her history, too.
If this is a movie about two sisters, why the ever loving fuck is it all about Elsa and her origins? What about Anna’s origins? They were her parents, too. Sure, we ask “why does Elsa have magic,” but why doesn’t Anna have magic? Why was Elsa the “gift”? Why is Anna’s superpower “love”?? And why is that “superpower” only valid when it’s in regards to Elsa? Why is Anna so strong, physically? Emotionally? Personally? Is it just her? Why isn’t she an element, too? What’s with this bridge bullshit? Why the fuckkkk is Elsa the “fifth spirit” when she’s ice and ice is literally just water? I have so many questions.
How the heck was Iduna Northuldra? Did she become “whiter” because she remained inside a castle for twenty years? Or was she always “white passing”? Or was she adopted into the forest? Who are her parents? Did anybody miss her when she ran off to the kingdom? Her scarf was from “one of [their] oldest families” and yet nobody seemed to know who she was? And what do you mean “oldest families”? Are there no remaining members of that family? Nobody who was missing her? Nobody who would’ve recognised her daughters who are literally carbon-copies of her????
The shipwreck scene and the following scene pissed me off soooo much in the theatre lol First, it really was beautiful how they did it, but the interactions felt out of character. Elsa brought up the memories of their parents’ demise without consoling Anna at all. Not only did she just do it without at least a warning, she then proceeded to leave her behind in her own fit. Which, okay, yes, to an extent that makes sense; she was over-ridden by guilt. But those were Anna’s parents too. Elsa was all she had, and Elsa left her behind. I just- AND THEN in this moment of severe grief and horror, as these terrible things were revealed, Anna was pushed away again to be left on her own to deal with things alone. She’d JUST sacrificed her own feelings for Elsa, and Elsa’s response was to shove her away. WHY. I just??? hello??? Like, Elsa does care about Anna, right? That’s canon? So why tf would they write her like this?? jfc
Every single new character was wasted potential. Mattias above all else was very interesting, and should’ve had at least ten minutes more screentime??? I liked the scene of him and Anna discussing whatever, but there should’ve been more. They both cared more about Arendelle than anyone; they were both sworn to protect. There could’ve been more of an on-screen relationship there. (and don’t fucking come at me with your gross-ass ships please, tyvm). Honeymaren and Ryder were there for ??? merchandise? A reason for Elsa to stay behind? Queer-baiting??? I don’t get it. They did,,, nothing. Yelena? Did nothing. Why do these name-characters do nothing?? What’s the point???
This was advertised as a “big adventure” but had hardly any adventure. Frohana was apart for most of the damn movie, the action scenes had little consequences, the “climax” was ??? what, Elsa freezing? Who cares?? It’s obvious she’s going to come back. The wave heading for Arendelle??? Yeah, that would’ve been a good climax if it actually did any damage. But no, I guess Elsa can teleport now? aight. and now she gets to play hero again even though she didn’t do shit
The plot(?) was very predictable, and didnt really have a twist. Old white guy kills innocent POC. Okay. That’s real life, yeah? It’s shit; it happens, but why was this whole movie based around that? Was it a political statement? We don’t really need more political movies these days??? People are aware, and things are shit as is; idk it just felt forced. But this is a v controversial subject so imma shut up lol
THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES. Unless you’re Anna. Then you suffer severely cuz,,, fuck her, right? The entire cave thing (as beautiful and needed as it was) could’ve been prevented entirely if Elsa had just fucking communicated. But instead, Anna had to suffer again in such a severe way. Her feelings DID have consequences; they effected her severely and even influenced wreckless behaviour. But then?? it’s all over. And suddenly, it doesn’t matter. Suddenly, who cares? Elsa returns and is (for some unforeseen reason) magically forgiven. This ISN’T HOW SISTERS ARE. If my sister pulled half the shit Elsa did, the first thing she’d be greeted with is a slap across the face and a very loud “fuck you.” THEN she’d get a hug and some tears. You don’t fuck with people’s emotions like that. And the fact that there were no serious consequences is infuriating.
Anna becomes Queen without context. Did she want to be queen? Did she suggest it? Did Elsa decided “eh fuck it i’m bored, your turn” and just dump it on her? Anna is a free-spirit. Yes, she was absolutely devoted to her kingdom; her people always came first; she was an incredibly loving and selfless princess, but was she truly prepared to give up that freedom to be Queen? I think she fits the role beautifully; she was absolutely born to rule. But is she happy? Or is she yet again cleaning up Elsa’s mess, since that seems to be all she does?
Why did Elsa stay in the forest? Is it because she felt like she belonged with the spirits? With the people? Away from civilisation? All of the above? None of the above? And how did that conversation go with Anna? How did she explain; “hey, I know I died and fucked you up and promised that we’d always stay together, but I’ve decided I’m gonna leave you behind again and stay here with these people I barely know.” Did Anna object, or did she see the positives of being away from someone so toxic???? It makes no senseeeee, they were so good together in the first movie; it all feels so out of character. Both of them feel out of character.
There were few (very few) moments in which they really were like themselves:
The charades scene.
“You think I’m c R A Z Y?”
Head tilts with Bruni.
Anna laughing at Elsa’s braid-stache.
Elsa making toys for children.
The pleasant Kristanna scenes at the beginning.
Anna’s anger scenes.
Even Elsa’s personal drama???
but that’s it? I’ve seen it four times in theatre, and a few times online (though mostly in pieces) so I don’t think I missed anything. Perhaps I’m blinded by the frustration that this film caused. Overall:
The plot was weak.
The animation was beautiful.
Kristanna wasn’t the Kristanna we truly know?
Elsa was dramatic and annoying because she had no development.
Anna was demoted to a clingy side-character and was given a half-assed purpose.
The music was meh.
There was too much and yet somehow not enough.
It was a mess.
Six years. SIX. I-
ugh.
final note: PLEASE ANSWER MY QUESTIONS IF I MISSED SOMETHING. I think it’s also important to note that if you went to the theatre for 2 hours of entertainment, that’s great, but not the same as those of us that have dedicated six years of our lives to these characters? So please don’t come @ me if you were just a movie-goer. I also wanna say that there were a lot of parts of this movie that I loved and will hold onto, but overall, the movie as a whole was meh. I LOVED Anna & Elsa in Frozen; they had good development and had reasons for being how they were. They had a good dynamtic and worked well together. I hated their relationship in F2; it was toxic and forced in many ways; they didn’t interact nearly enough, and when they did, they were bitching for the sake of plot, which was very frustrating.
This isn’t a hate post so please don’t come at me lol my opinion is entirely irrelevent in the grand scheme of things, but hey, we’re here to chat and share, right?
sigh.
#frozen 2 spoilers#review#anna and elsa#queen anna#elsa#anna#frozen#frozen 2#frozen 2 review#this is so much longer than i had intended holy shit#i don't necessarily HATE it#but idk if i like it??#and they didn't live up to expectations#and too many things felt forced and unecessary#i'm glad my ship sailed but at the same time it was all over the place?#hm#sad#kristanna#deserves#better#:(
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MARCH 2020
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The Stones are touring the U.S. again.
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Paul Reubens is touring with Pee Wee’s Big Adventure.
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Al Franken is touring.
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Keenan Thompson and Hasan Minhaj are bringing comedy back to the White House Correspondents dinner on April 5.
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Days alert: There is some casting news but most of this won’t show up until the fall. Word is a couple of newbies will be Remington Hoffman who will play Li Shin, son of Mr. Shin and Emily O’Brien may join the cast. Nadia Bjorlin (Chloe) may be on her way back. Let’s bring the original Phillip back for her!!! Brandon Barash (Stefan) will return as well as Louise Sorel ( Vivian )and Alison Sweeney ( Sami). Judi Evans is headed back. Will she play Adrienne or Bonnie?? It looks like Casey Moss (JJ), Freddie Smith (Sonny), Chandler Massey (Will) and Galen Gering (Rafe) mill head out for awhile.
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It looks like Friends freaks will finally get their reunion on HBO. I am glad they aren’t bringing the characters back and are just getting together to talk about their time together.
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Downhill hit theatres on Valentine’s Day with Will Ferrell, Julia Louis- Dreyfus and Zoe Chao. The film was written and directed by Nat Faxon and Jim Rash.
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The more I see of it, the more I LOVE Stumptown, the best show that nobody seems to know about. Please renew ABC!!!!!
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So.. Rush Limbaugh got the Medal of Freedom. Oh my.
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Shadow Inc. owned by former Clinton and Obama staffers made an app that thoroughly fucked up the Iowa caucus. It was good at calculating the results but not delivering them. And hey.. Wolf Blitzer, stay off the phone with people that are trying to get those results. Let them just do their job!!
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Brooklyn 99 is back and Vanessa Bayer is there!!!
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Rod Blagojevich is out and hitting every show that will have him. Trump pardoned him along with 10 other criminals including Ed DeBartolo Jr., Mike Milken and Bernard Kerik.
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Forty thousand kids won’t get free lunch because Trump threw them off food stamps. The two usually go hand in hand. Getting food stamps automatically sets a kid up for the free lunch program.
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Over 1000 former DOJ officials have asked Bill Barr to resign.** 70 former Senators have written an open letter to congress to tell them they are not fulfilling their congressional duties.**” Yoo Hoo! Bush, Clinton, Carter, Obama, you’re up.” –Patricia Arquette
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Pete Davidson and Kaia Gerber have split.
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Indiana Beach is closing after 94 years.
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Denny Hamlin won the 2020 Daytona 500.
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Can’t we get some real gigs for Rainn Wilson and Curtis Armstrong? Ok, so Cyrtis Armstrong was on Stumptown so thank goodness for that! They can do better than Dominoes and Little Caesars ads. And how funny is it that Dominoes, known for its very Chrustian owners use a Risky Business ( a film about prostitutes) ad for their product. Hmm.
*****Hey.. Comics, quit bringing up Trump and his former womanizing. It didn’t work with Clinton and it won’t work here. People just don’t seem to care. Focus on the real damage he is doing.
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Scary Clown is working on opening nearly a million acres of land in Utah for energy exploration that had been a National monument. Redford and Romney can’t be happy about that.
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A new animated series from a brand new production company owned by Natasha Lyonne and Maya Rudolph looks promising. Look for The Hospital.
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Southern Illinois University is giving Bob Odenkirk an honorary degree.
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Ukranian immigrants Lt. Col. Vindman and his twin brother are out. Ambassador to the EU Sonland is out.
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The Democrats had a debate on Feb. 7 . At Andrew Yang’s first chance to speak, he rehashed his stump speech. I mean, c’mon give us something new. There really seemed to be a restrained nervousness on the stage that night. Klobachar seemed too needy but she got great reviews. Biden called Buttigieg ‘a friend ‘ a couple of times. Mayor Pete did quite well. ** Deval Patrick is out** Andrew Yang is out.**Michael Bennet is out** Another debate was on Feb. 19.** Bloomberg/Yang? Is this true?
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Check out the new series, Hunters. It is awesome, funny and terrifying!
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Dozens of Native American women and girls have disappeared from Big Horn county, Montana over the last few years. The victims were later found dead and Trump has put a federal task force together.
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Grassley and Wyden are trying to get lower prescription drug prices but Moscow Mitch won’t bring the proposal to the floor. Others are looking to get some traction on HR3.
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JSW Steel has sued the Trump administration for refusing to exempt it from paying the levies on slabs of steel that the company imports.
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64 women have filed sexual harassment or discrimination lawsuits against Mike Bloomberg. I’m not a fan of the guy but it does seem sort of coincidental. It does not seem to matter cuz all his ads seem to be working, he is picking up steam. Tom Steyer is gaining a bit of momentum as well.
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The corona virus has brought us Covid 19. 600 people are being held in quarantine camps that the military has set up. Italy has new cases and the disease is spreading. Scary Clown is trying to spin it all.
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ICE is being sent into sanctuary cities to cause trouble for immigrants.
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You have to check out Horse girl with Alison Brie, Molly Shannon and Matthew Gray Gubler on Netflix .
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Rapper Larry Sanders AKA LV is letting us in on a miscarriage of justice he has had to live thru. LV, best known for his work on Coolio’s Gangsters Paradise, was approached by police and later put on the Calgang database. The practice put about 80,000 mostly African Americans on a sort of gang list. In a 2016 audit it was found that there were many inaccuracies including the names of babes who could not possibly be gang affiliated.
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Nature does not need people. People need nature. –Harrison Ford
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The Clark bar is back. The roll out has started in Pittsburgh and will soon spread across the country.
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Scientists have found some turtle fossils that are the size of a car in South America.
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U can donate to the Trump campaign and may win a yaqut and hunting trip with Don Jr. The Beach Boys will perform.
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The Oscars were held Feb. 9. Brad Pitt and the production design team won for Once upon a Time in Hollywood. Woo Hoo! Word is that Pitt has hired a speech writer to write his acceptances. JoJo Rabbit won for adapted screenplay. Little Women won for Little Women and Toy Story 4 for animated film. Laura Dern won best supporting actress. Renee Zellweger and Joaquin Phoenix too home the top actor prizes. Parasite surprised everybody and won best pic and got Bong Joon Ho a best director statue. My best dressed were Billy Porter, Antonio Banderes and his date, Janelle Monae ( her opening seemed to make some in the audience uncomfortable), Robert DeNiro, Laura Dern, Diane Ladd, Geena Davis, Regina King, Charlize Theron, Adam Driver, Joanne Tucker, Cynthia Erivo, Scarlett Johansson, Natalie Portman and Kathy Bates, I don’t know what Kristen Wiig and Idina Menzel were thinking. Wiig always has a unique style so I have to admire that. ** The ratings were down. I have heard people saying they just don’t watch award shows or late night shows anymore because they are afraid things will get political. Funny, that is part of the reason I watch!
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Tom Papa was pontificating about a real dog show that should have REAL dogs. It would make a great weekly show with people bringing on their dogs.
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The goalies of the Hurricanes were out of commission and David Ayres, the Zamboni driver was brought in to help and the won against the Maple Leafs. Woo Hoo!!
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Hooray for New Hampshire and their use of paper ballots. Things in the campaign got a little shook up with Bernie taking the top followed by Pete and Amy.
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2 years of research in Canada has brought the announcement of a new discovery. Skull fragments that were cleaned and collected about 10 years ago have been named Thanatotheristes or the reaper of death. The discovery helps us all learn more about the early times of Tyrannosaurids, a sub group that includes T.Rex.
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New Jersey has a ban on self- serve pumps and another state is talking about getting in on the action. The gas station attendant act has been proposed in Illinois.
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Van Jones was right when he said we shouldn’t give Trump any press coverage for a week. He would hate it. Trump loves the old adage of bad publicity is better than none because he just must have attention. It would never work for they just can’t resist.** Joe Mcguire is out after he warned of Russian interference. If you want to keep your job in this administration, do not tell the truth. Now at the Department of National Intelligence is Johnny Mcentee , a 29 year old former football player who worked on the campaign. He immediately called department heads and said he wanted lists of never Trumpers in their offices. ** And who is in charge of weeding out the people in the government who may be disloyal to Scary Clown? Well, it is none other than Virginia Thomas, wife of Supreme Court justice Clarence. She calls it the list of snakes. Trump is now saying he even wants liberal judges on the Supreme Court to recuse themselves when it comes to “Trump related cases”. It just keeps getting worse.
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Trump had fun in India. He should, his business has 5 projects going there right now worth 1.5 billion.
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Harvey Weinstein was found guilty of rape and criminal sexual assault. He was not found guilty of all the charges that included predatory behavior.
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Andrew Yang is a new correspondent at CNN. He tells us that he is getting word from former donors that Bloomberg is calling those big donors. Allegedly he is telling them they do not have to donate to his campaign because he can afford his own campaign but he still won’t forget them. He would like them to save their money and not give money to other democrats running either.** And I am so sick of talking heads trying to tell us to play it safe. We are not as stupid as we look, thank you!! ** Now there is a firestorm about Bernie telling the world that the education program that Castro implemented was a good thing. I understand the anger and it could not have come at a worse time and he did it to himself. BUT.. We are adults and we have to be able to talk about things as they really are, not in sound bites. Castro sucked and history teaches us that bad people do good things occasionally and good people do bad things once in a while. ** It seems that everyone was in agreement that we would all gather behind the winner of the democratic campaign to beat Trump. Suddenly when it could be Bernie, everybody is bitching.
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This month held 2 more Democratic debates. The Nevada debate got pretty heated. I see that Mayor Pete and Bloomberg are lefties (left handed that is). Pete always looked poised and articulate which I appreciate and he got in a good one when he mentioned that the party should choose someone who is actually a democrat. Bernie seemed a little rattled by that. Later Pete really dressed down Amy Klobuchar and made himself look like a dick. Joe Biden jumped in with his credits occasionally but often seemed a bit lost. He slammed back that they were all talking about the health care plane he helped to create and that he himself had dealt with the Mexican President. His name came up after it was mentioned that Amy could not remember the President’s name. The gloves were off with Bloomberg as Elizabeth Warren called him out on Billionaires and NDA’s. I loved the interaction but realistically Mr. Mike can’t just release people from agreements they made in an NDA, especially if it did not involve him. Bloomberg sounded pompous and clueless about the world outside of his company. He got a moan when he said he couldn’t exactly use turbo tax and when he said he may have told a few jokes that women didn’t like. He brushed off his taxes much like Trump does. The former mayor of NY called out socialists as communists. Klobuchar had the best comeback of the night when she was told her health care plan could fit on a post it. She proclaimed that the post it was invented in her state of Minnesota. Again, there were people shouting from the audience as Joe tried to talk. C’mon give everybody an equal chance.
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The South Carolina debate was fiery as well. The CBS debate was hosted by Gayle King and Norah O’Donnell. Bloomberg was booed right off the bat about Russia helping Bernie but he late had many cheers. He and Biden and Steyer had some real support there. Tom Steyer was actually quite impressive and seemed well spoken. He was the only one who brought up the impeachment. He had a great point that we all know that republicans who did not convict Trump are complicit in the Russian meddling. Then he ruined it all by being alarmist with his fear. He warned us off the former republican and the socialists. I loved Bernie’s ideas about small business’s getting in on the marijuana business and not letting big corporations taking it over. He is also the only one in debates that I have seen consistently bring up Native Americans. Biden again kept jumping in to tell us that he did this or that. Amy disagreed about a bill he claimed to have written. Warren said “dig in” numerous times. She went for the jugular with Bloomberg when she said a former female employee of his said to “kill it” in response to her pregnancy. He denied it but it sure is memorable. She did make great points that he has given much money to Linsey Graham’s campaign as well as other republican runs including against her. BTW he also gave 2.3 mil to Rick Snyder, the Gov of Michigan after the water crisis was well known. I love that Amy is always saying that we shouldn’t fight amongst ourselves but she just does not have the votes so she needs to go. Bernie got some boos about guns for he seems the softest in that area.
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Joe Biden won the South Carolina primary in a big way.
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Dick Van Dyke, Sarah Silverman and Public Enemy among others will be at the Bernie Sanders rally in L.A. on March 1.
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Just think what the 400 million that Bloomberg spent on his campaign could have done for the debt of the average American. Instead of a campaign for a presidency that he can’t win, he could have helped so many get a leg up.
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I don’t understand why “respected” journalists like Chuck Todd don’t throw W H reps off the set when they disrespect him or his colleagues with fake news jabs.
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Bob Moore of Bob’s Red Mill is giving his company away to his employees. Now, that’s a boss!!
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Bone, Thugs and Harmony have made a deal with Buffalo Wild Wings to rename themselves Boneless thugs and Harmony. The publicity stunt is to promote boneless wings.
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NASA is hiring.
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Scotland has made feminine sanitary products free!!
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Is this true? There were pigeons in Nevada with MAGA hats glued to their heads??
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The final Criminal Minds has aired. CBS often aired double episodes which made it seem like they really wanted to get rid of it. Kirsten Vangsness and Erica Messer wrote the final episode which seemed to give special attention to Penelope and Reid as they were the originals. The other characters seemed a little overlooked but they all had happy endings. Where was Reid’s new girlfriend? I was hoping to see Shemar Moore but it was great to see Reisgraf and Howell which are old favorites.
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Animal Kingdom returns to TNT on May 28.
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So there is a bit of a mess with the Roger Stone sentencing. Trump is hopping mad about the long sentence recommendation, Barr is said to be pretending to spar with the Prez, the DOJ is backing down and people are resigning.
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R.I.P. Shirley Jean Cade, Robert Conrad, Katherine Johnson, Lyle Mays, B. Smith, A.E. Hotchner, Bashir Jackson, Ja’net Dubois, Pat Agee, victims of the Molson Coors shooting and Orson Bean.
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Hey so like...how do u justify romanticising a minor/adult relationship bc as a minor it kinda makes me uncomfortable. You’re an amazing writer, I just don’t quite get why you chose the age gap
before i address your question directly, and i will, i want to point out a few things that confuse me about this ask.
first, the admission of being a minor with the implication you’ve read my work, and now outright interacting with me. i’ve written maybe half a dozen g- and t-rated fics, and none of them are particularly popular, which i’m guessing means you’ve read my explicit fics, which means you’ve clicked past Ao3′s polite “18+ only” warning. my apologies if this assumption is incorrect – maybe you really have only read my three or four gen/teen-rated fics. that just seems very unlikely to me because all of my more popular fics are mature and explicit.
now, while admitting you are a minor made uncomfortable by minor/adult relationships, you have directly approached me, a 29 year old woman, to ask me why i’ve made the choices i’ve made. granted, by going on anon, you’ve ensured that this is a public forum, but if you’d PM’d me, i wouldn’t have responded, because i am not here to interact with minors.
which brings me to my conclusion of this portion of the ask, which is: i am not writing for minors and i do not want to interact with minors. i can’t control what you read or don’t read and it’s absolutely not my responsibility to cater to you in any way, especially if you knowingly and voluntarily click past the 18+ warning. but i can control my personal interactions, and i urge you not to reach out to me again.
next i’m going to nitpick the word “romanticize” which is a word heavy in the current moral rhetoric. literally speaking, you are right. i am making an age gap romance romantic. rhetorically speaking, to “romanticize” something means to flatten or gloss over it, sweep potential consequences under the rug. to romanticize abuse, for example, is to make it beautiful, to ignore all the trauma and pain that comes along with it. (i think it is a worthy artistic endeavor to attempt to romanticize abuse in fiction, if for only the ability to highlight how fucked up abusive relationships can feel in the moment, but that’s a rant for another time).
since you haven’t read training wheels, i can tell you outright i am not romanticizing a minor/adult relationship. there are certainly unrealistic/porny moments, but i’m not shying away from the actual emotional consequences of being a 17yo* girl dating a 25yo man. i’m doing my best to depict this relationship the way these relationships are actually felt, because they do happen, and i have been in them. they can be very romantic, but that doesn’t mean i’m romanticizing them. though we’re not in his pov, bellamy is acutely aware of the greater context of their relationship. and clarke, who has no context, is doing her best to navigate the difficulty of her situation, semi-aware that it’s something that will be haunting her for a long, long time.
i am not beautifying the ugliness of their relationship; i am not fetishizing (another word i take issue with) the minor body. being in clarke’s pov means that bellamy is object of desire, and meanwhile we get, through clarke’s thoughts, the sometimes awkward and confusing realization of what it means to be wanted, loved, used, seen, broken, trespassed, and all the other things teenage girls sometimes have to navigate.
and i have one more thing to say before i answer your actual question: you are allowed to be uncomfortable reading fiction. in fact, i think you should be uncomfortable reading fiction. all art should make us uncomfortable, because in discomfort lies broader awareness. by consuming things which push at the boundaries of our narrow reality, we are capable of widening that reality, and that’s what it means to learn and grow and become the people we want to be. you cannot become a better, stronger, wiser person without facing and overcoming that which makes you uncomfortable.
i also resent a bit the implication that i, a fanfic writer, a queer woman, am beholden to appeasing your comfort when straight white male writers are not. i assume you’re not sending jroth letters about how murphy’s sex slavery arc in s3 made you uncomfortable. or that the entire premise of the show revolves around putting a hundred minors in a ship and dropping them onto a potentially lethal planet. or raven, a teenager, sleeping with bellamy, an adult, in s1. and that’s not even mentioning the violence perpetuated against minors in the show. they die! and they bleed! like, a lot!! charlotte, a 12yo girl, dies a gruesome death in s1. they are minors forced to kill or be killed in exceedingly violent ways, and you’re in my inbox asking why i’m writing a fic that depicts a loving and consensual relationship between a 17yo (clarke’s canonical age in s1) and a 25yo.
now i’ll answer your actual ask.
you use the word “justify” as if i had to do some kind of logistical puzzle to make this fic morally okay in my eyes. i can tell you now, i did not, because the story exists to navigate that logistical puzzle on its own. the conflict poses the question: is this okay? is this wrong? what about it is wrong? for what reasons is it wrong? and i also attempt (in a clunky way because it’s a bit rough, plot-wise) to navigate what “informed consent” really means to a 17yo who has no information to go off of. for me it’s an experiment in what consent really is. clarke wants bellamy, but she doesn’t have a full awareness of the consequences of that want, so is it truly consensual? what does bellamy have to do to fully inform her of those consequences? is it even his responsibility, or should clarke take more agency over her experiences? and lastly, the most interesting question of them all to me – what happens to the minors in consensual age gap relationships? how do they cope with that experience years later? in what ways does it change them?
though it’s not my responsibility to indulge my personal ties to this conflict in order to further “justify” it, i can assure you, i am writing this from clarke’s pov having been the younger party in many age gap relationships, at times a minor. at times coerced. at times completely uninformed. but each time, consensual. i sought out the men i dated. i took the lead. i propositioned them. and i consider: how has that affected me and the way i love now?
my mom at 20, married my dad, 32. my older sister at 16, met her (now ex) husband, her then-boss, at 23 (they waited until she was 18 to start dating). i dated an 18yo and then a 19yo when i was 14. a 21yo when i was 16. a 32yo when i was 19. a 47yo when i was 22. but i also had a long-term relationship with someone who was just three months younger than me. age gap is not the only way i know how to love, but it is certainly a way to love, and one i find, in lieu of seeking it out in reality, narratively compelling. so i write about those experiences in order to better understand them now that i’m older. in order to take them apart and piece them back together. in order to, in some cases, relive them, because i enjoyed so much about them.
i don’t pursue older men anymore because i no longer seek male validation. i don’t meet a handsome middle-aged man and need him to love me to feel like my existence in the world is warranted. but that doesn’t mitigate all the old habits and drive and potentially genetic disposition that led me to relentlessly pursuing them in the first place. so now i sublimate that into fiction and offer my experience and understanding to others who might be predisposed in the same way, or people who are not and curious about what that experience is like. and that’s what fiction does.
lastly, i’ve sort of saturated myself in age gap stories. i’ve watched every age gap movie i can get my hands on, read every book. i dive through google and ao3 looking for age gap recs, seeking out the one story or fic or movie that not only gets the relationship right, but figures out how to make it work. that’s all i want – a realistic, plausible solution to this very delicate and complicated kind of relationship. and i can’t find that story, so i’ve decided to write it myself.
training wheels is an uncomfortable story about a romantic minor/adult relationship and the realistic psychological consequences of it, both in the immediate present and long-term, and you are supposed to be made uncomfortable by it, regardless of your age. it makes romantic but does not romanticize age gap relationships. i do not take the morality of this story lightly, nor its meaning or intentions. whether i succeed in this is up to interpretation, and i can’t control that interpretation, but i can tell you with certainty what my intentions have been going into this story, and exactly why i’ve made the decisions i’ve made regarding it.
*the age of consent in ohio, where training wheels is set, is 16. i recognize the current rhetoric around this is “legality is not morality” or whatever, but again – the purpose of training wheels is in part to directly address this conflict
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Ask and ye shall fucking receive, bitches!!!
Oh yeah, that’s right, the cast lists have been posted! Moreover, posted IN FULL! Actors, character names, character professions, and chARACTER DESCRIPTIONS HOLY SHIT!!!!1!!
Once again, I have done my best to sort the Bacchanalians by track. It was much more challenging than last year (and took a good deal longer), where I only mixed up two. The music track is easy, of course, but combat and improv are another matter. In the end, I simply could not decide for a fair number, and these are listed in a separate section.
A small note, I had to copyedit the FUCK out of these descriptions. Man, I dunno, I think their apostrophe key was maybe busted? and there were loads of misspellings, a few missing spaces, and occasionally just the wrong word entirely. If anyone with any sort of influence on the Faire’s website happens to see this, PLEASE go back and fix these errors.
As always, check the Faire’s website for headshots. And also for the scenario, I guess, because I just realized I never got around to making a post about that.
Leads
Mary Huff : Queen Elizabeth I – Queen of England
Young and full of hope for the future of her country, Queen Elizabeth I is eager to take part in the day’s festivities and to learn more about the people she is meant to rule. Though she is youthful in appearance, she should not be underestimated. Queen Elizabeth I is intelligent, quick-witted and does not suffer fools lightly.
Joshua Kachnycz : Robert Dudley – Master of Horse
Wealthy and benevolent, this Englishman seeks to ensure everything is perfect for the Queen’s coronation day. Though he is a strong, independently wealthy, and capable man, he is not afraid to listen to and heed a woman’s opinion, which quickly makes him one of Queen Elizabeth I most trusted advisors and friends. [Listen I am so glad this man is returning, he is such a joy to watch act.] [Zis is pleasink to me!]
Alex Stompoly : Henry Carry – Nobleman
Cousin to Elizabeth I, Henry Carey has a claim to the English throne and is not likely to let you forget it. While he ultimately wants what is best for the country, he doesn't always have the hearts of the ordinary citizens he represents at the forefront of his political strategy. It may take him a while to believe that such a young Queen can be a strong leader. [OH FUCK YEAH ALEX IS THE VILLAIN THIS IS EVERYTHING I’VE EVER WANTED]
Combat
Sunny Vinsavich : Bev Tanningrove – Tanningrove Family Muscle
When carousing with friends, she is playful and carefree; but this cousin to Jack Tanningrove is quick to anger if she suspects you of disrespecting the Tanningrove name. Bold and hot-blooded, it doesn't take much to convince her to enter into a brawl to defend her house.
Emily Wirthwein : Sylvia Forel – Sword Mistress
As lethal as she is lovely, this German Master Swordswoman is renowned throughout Europe. If you are lucky enough to have her in your employ, you can expect her complete loyalty and services as a sellsword – as long as you aren't outbid by a wealthier party. [Oh good, the German mercenaries are back.]
Mel Angelo : Mary McBride – Dance Mistress of the Shire
Best friend to Rose Hopfield, this dancing mistress makes a loyal, dependable, and energetic companion. Shire folk beware: don't call her a coward or insult the Hopfields, else you might find yourself face to face with the pointy end of her sword.
Ilana Lo : Fan Liu – Pirate
Running away from home at the age of thirteen, Fan Liu spent her formative years as a member of pirate crews in many different countries. Because of these varied experiences and her own innate charm, Fan Liu is a brilliant negotiator, easily able to talk people into doing just about anything she asks. And if they make the mistake of not doing as she asks, they will soon face her steel.
Leigh Loureiro : Bonnie Buchanna – Pirate
A formidable opponent who can fight, curse, and drink just as well if not better than her male counterparts. Nicknamed ‘Bloody Bonnie’ for her reputation of leaving no survivors, many would be surprised to learn that she secretly has a soft spot for soft and cuddly critters. But,please, don't tell her we told you!
Amanda Darrigo : Mistress Quickley – Tavern Keeper
Thrilled at finally fulfilling her dream of opening her own tavern, this little lady isn’t shy about inviting people in or delegating responsibilities to her subordinates. In fact, she loves being a boss so much she might try to hire you to manage the day-to-day operations so she can focus on big-picture items: like how to spend her hard earned ducats.
Sean Besecker : Captain James Thatch – Captain of The Queen's Vengeance
Thatch grew up on pirate ships watching and learning from the best sea-robbers in the business, so it is no surprise that he is one of the most ruthless and cutthroat pirates to sail the seven seas. While polite society would consider him uncivilized, he does live his life adhering closely to a very important set of rules: the Piratical Code. [pyrate ship count: 1]
Matthew Glen Clark : Bartholomew Wainwright – Yeoman
Dark and brooding, the mysterious Bartholomew Wainwright is often mistaken as cynical when a better term for him would be logical. He makes decisions using his brain and not his heard – the same cannot be said for some of his fellow Yeoman.
Austin James : Edward Mawson – First Mate
With knowledge of the civilized world, Edward Mawson, sometimes referred to as Maw, is the perfect First Mate to his unruly Captain. He is easily able to represent the Captain at important affairs and likes to mingle with the upper crust of society. In fact, he likes it so much that he dreams of bettering his own position so that he might one day join them.
Music
The Sirens
Sarah Bartley : Captain Sheena Daley O'Connell – Captain of The Unyeilding Tempest
The Leader. She is bold, brave, fearless and knows the world of piracy like the back of her well-worn hands. Sheena actively attempts to keep the peace in ORC but enjoys looting and pillaging as much as her fellow captains. Her deeds are heroic, but often tall in nature! Ask her to tell you all about when she saved her entire crew with a single plank of wood. She will regale you. [pyrate ship count: 2]
Leigh Anne Hamlin : Captain Scarlett Seymour – Captain of The Shadow of Prophecy
The Joker. She is laid back, extremely confident but relentlessly lazy. Scarlett always cracks jokes and makes light of difficult situations. She has been a pirate all her life and she is damn good at it! She is fond of long naps, drinking and gambling. Whats her secret? Good luck and tons of it! [Four things. First, pyrate ship count: 3. Second, presuming she named he ship herself, I guarantee that this character is queer, because that’s the most Extra ship name ever, and only us queer folk are that overdramatic. Three, prophesy? seymour? see-more? r u kidding me? Four: if you go look at her headshot, this actor bears an uncanny resemblance to Vanessa Sterling.]
Megan Jones : Captain Ruth "The Blade" Gibson – Captain of The Jolly Walrus
The Wild Card. She is tough, blunt, and has a wee bit of a rage problem. Although she loves piracy and has the scars to prove it, she melts at the sight of children and cuddly animals, who have the ability to soften her strong demeanor. Do not dare question her about the name of her ship! Shes sensitive about it. [Oh hell yeah, Megan Jones is a pyrate! I am very pleased about this. Also, pyrate ship count: 4.]
Sarah Williams : Captain Elanor Keetly – Captain of The Malevolence
The newly appointed Captain of The Malevolence. The innocent. She has inherited her newfound position of Captain after all the members of her crew mysteriously perished in a tragic maritime accident. She has a thirst for knowledge and craves to be the very best in her new career! Elanor is extremely enthusiastic, but a bit frightened of the weight of her new position. She has a malicious alter ego named Cookie. [Well, that certainly took at turn at the last line! Pyrate ship count: 5, and whomever named this vessel was definitely queer, too.]
The Irish Revels
Autumn Sheffy : Siobhán O'Sullivan – Royal Music Tutor
Having left the rest of her family behind to seek her fortune, this maestro has ascended to the ranks of the English court! Surely she wouldn't lord this success over the rest of her siblings...
Jordan Bell : Gilda O'Sullivan – Musician
Gilda is an optimistic and charismatic leader. She hasn't the time for negativity or ill will amongst her siblings, so she simply pushes through it with a bright smile. She is a perfectionist and an overachiever. She adores music and her siblings, despite their failings, and will do anything to make sure the festival day goes off without a hitch. She has the color-coded scrolls to prove it! because what are we, animals?
Morgan Harwood : Alannah O'Sullivan – Musician
Alannah is kind, carefree, and a bit odd. She is the youngest of the quintuplets and the most connected to the universe. She has the ability to see magic creatures and is often overtaken by her imagination. Her magic touch can calm her siblings when the time arises. The music she performs grounds her back in reality. She doesn’t walk, she floats. [Whelp, this character obviously has a connection to the fae, so she’s definitely Autistic.]
Jared Haverdink : Keagan O'Sullivan – Musician
Keagan is a realist, has an excellent sense of humor, and is endlessly sarcastic. He has a bit of the ol’ Irish temper that is easily set off by small things. The most talented musically of the O’Sullivan siblings, he was always very skilled, but has recently improved dramatically, almost overnight. His siblings are suspicious he has made a deal with a sea witch for his newfound shredding skills. [I’m so glad that last sentence exists.]
Joey Mudd : Deklyn O'Sullivan – Musician
Deklyn, like his sister Gilda, is a very friendly and charismatic young musician. He is full of life, energy, joy and is extremely earnest. However, he does tend to worry, and his imagination takes hold, extrapolating the smallest misstep that could lead to the doom of his family. Frequently stares into the middle distance, right between the crucial and the trivial, between existential dread and I’ll take the dressing on the side. [The Millennial™]
The Rakish Rogues
Christopher Burch : Sterling Armstrong – Highwayman, Leader of Group
The leader of this merry band of misfits. He is bold, ambitious, but a tad arrogant. Sterling fancies himself as a ladies’ man, but when approached by a woman, he can’t always follow through. His leadership style is that of blind intuition. His British dialect is very put-on and manly, but he often slips into Cockney, his real voice, when angered. Sterling doesn't walk, he glides. Is that his real name or did he make it up? [FUCK YEAH THEY DID THE THING THEY PUT HIM ON THE MUSIC TRACK YESSSSSS!]
Chase Brackett : Tucker Abbot – Highwayman, Sterling's Protégé
A former homeless orphan who was adopted by Sterling Armstrong as his younger brother and protégé . He absolutely worships the ground his brother walks on. Tucker is very bright, optimistic, and somewhat naïve. He is completely unaware when he says filthy and inappropriate things. Sterling said it so it must be fine! He loves the life of crime, but mostly he just wants to find a beautiful lady and sing songs to her pretty face forever. [This character description has newsie energy.]
Pete Hedberg : Jeremiah Slight – Highwayman, Sterling's Right-Hand Man
He is the muscle of the group, but secretly the brains. Jeremiah is the only person keeping this group afloat, but he would rather stick to the shadows than be in the limelight. He is excellent at thievery and a master of disguise. If you get close enough to find out how many accents he can do, you may not live to tell the tale! [*laughs in a decade of faire accents*] [also slight is the right hand man? slight of hand? fuck you.]
Ian Agnew : William "Bill" Crimson – Highwayman, former Benadictine Monk
A former Benedictine monk who was living a pious life in an abbey. He one day was hit in the head with a bible, decided to leave the cloth and turn to a more exciting life of crime. He adores his new lifestyle and lives it with absolutely no restraint or regret. Bill has a newfound love of drinking, women, and gambling. He may have a few loose screws, but he’s never been happier. [So there’s a good bit to unpack there. Kind of like a reverse Cadfael.]
Improv
Sheila Barton : Lady Delores Anne Penburthy – Lady Mayor of Mount Hope
Effervescent and vivacious, the Lady Mayor is sure to give Queen Elizabeth I the warm and generous welcome deserving a ruler of England. Having earned the love of the townspeople, the Lady Mayor could teach the young Queen a thing or two about earning the trust and loyalty of her people.
Adam Shepley : William Cecil – Advisor to the Queen
Her Majesty’s most stalwart advisor, and head of her privy council. Usually the smartest man in the room, and well aware of it, Cecil knows Elizabeth will be a good queen. Honestly after her sister Mary, things can only go up.
Joe Penn : Jacob Perry – Sheriff of Mount Hope
He loves putting away bad guys and solving mysteries. The only mystery he cant solve: how to grow up. [Oh. Hell. Yeah.]
Jonathan Handley : Sir William Pickering – Nobleman
Well educated, well bred, well connected. William Pickering has studied at the best schools, spent time among the French court, and is a good friend of Queen Elizabeth; but surely he would never let those things go to his head. He is still a man of the people, with his finger on the gilded pulse of the court.
Rob Condas : William Shakespeare – Apprentice Glover
Everyone needs gloves, and serving all levels of society has made young Bill a keen observer of the human condition. He has heard many stories, and feels that he has many stories to tell. He’d like to try his hand at playwrighting – maybe he can wrangle up some actors to try out a new play or two. [This is absolutely genius, because if we remain in the same universe for a couple years, we’ll get to see his transition to fully-fledged playwright!]
Adam Kampouris : Christopher "Kit" Marlowe – Playwright
Full of charm and swagger, this playwright can woo a hundred paramours without running out of pickup lines; finish several thousand tankards of ale without retiring for bed; and accomplish almost any task without exerting too much effort; but he cannot seem to finish a play. He is hoping Mount Hope Shire will provide him the inspiration he needs to pen his next masterpiece.
Kelsey Jefferies : Gretchen Froman – Heir to the Sausage Throne
Her parents have newly acquired a fortune from their successful Sausage empire, and they like to flaunt it! Fortunately for them, their daughter is responsible enough for both of them and makes sure they don’t blow it all in a single shopping trip. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t enjoy some of the perks – just that she is the only one of the three with some class about it. [For context, see the Blackfryars’ descriptions.]
Noelani Stevenson : Eskarina Nutter – Wise Woman
This cunning woman knows that there are things in this world that cannot be explained, and their solutions must be equally inexplicable. A mistress of folk medicine, herbal lore, and charms, she will heal you up quick or dispel the evil eye. Just remember that what she can cure, she can just as easily give back if you cross her. [hell yeah my pagan girl! Also if you look at her headshot, her design is literally Sabrina but a little paler and with blond hair, which is most amusing to me.] [but like,,, why is her last name nutter.]
Kira Gaudynski : Stella Hopfield – Bottler
Wife of John Hopfield. Though her title is Bottler, she does so much more – marketing, distribution, HR, pretty much everything that isn’t the actual brewing of the beer...and girl, is she good at it! She thrives under pressure, and fortunately for her, there is always pressure abounding.
Ryan Perry : John Hopfield – Brew Master
Patriarch of the Hopfield family. His brews are best. His ales are awesome. His stouts are stellar. His lagers are...really good too. Hes proud of the name he has made for his family, and knows that beer is the true heart of Mount Hope.
Katelyn Shreiner : Sherry Tanningrove – Mistress of the Cellars
Sister of Horice Tanningrove and his partner in the winery. Her mind is like the aging process of wine: calculating, patient, and meticulous. She has an eye for detail and rarely jumps to conclusions. She knows that trends come and go, but wine will be forever.
Michael Stahler : Horace Tanningrove – Vinter
Patriarch of the Tanningrove Family. Wine is what put the shire of Mount Hope on the map, and Horace is proud of that family tradition. He knows Queen Elizabeth will have a more refined palate than her late father and sister, and will help bring Mount Hope’s wines back to the top no matter what those uppity Hopfields say. [yeah okay so there’s definitely a family rivalry here]
Alright, You Stumped Me
Katie Burch : Theresa Ratchet – Rat Catcher
Sickness has begun blanketing the world. Some people blame it on bad smells, some people believe it to be God’s wrath due to the sinful ways of today’s culture. Theresa, however, believes it to be because of the rats. She can’t prove it, and no one else believes her, but she will do whatever it takes to rid Mount Hope of these verminous infestations and save the populous in the process. [Heck yeah, my science-based girl, go get it!]
George Hamilton : Douglas Johnson – Master Thief
He’s been arrested so many times by Sheriff Perry, they know practically everything about each other. One might even suspect they’ve become friends, but Douglas Johnson would never take advantage of his friendship....in any way that would be obvious to Sheriff Jacob. [I’m always a slut for this sort of dynamic!]
Shannon Holder : Rose Hopfield – Brew Master's Daughter
Impulsive, independent, and passionate, this young woman is exploring the world on her own and beginning to see things in a new light, not solely from the perspective of her brewmaster father. By the end of the festival day, she may even sip her first glass of wine!
Jesse Kortus : Jack Tanningrove – Vinter's Son
Idealistic, intelligent, and inquisitive, this young man is coming into his own and beginning to question the things he has grown up with as facts. For example: contrary to his father’s opinion, there seem to be a great deal of people upon the shire who prefer beer to wine. He intends to spend the day finding out just why that is. [....oh great we’re gonna have friggin’ het star-crossed lovers up in here, aren’t we.]
John Surgener : Charles Kent – Yeoman
Fiercely loyal to the Queen, Charles Kent is every bit the ideal hero. With a strong moral compass and an idyllic spirit, Kent is fast, powerful, and has quickly leapt to the top of the list of the Queens favorite Yeomen.
Haley Ward : Amy Cooper – Cooper
Who would have thought a business person could suffer from TOO MUCH demand? With the ongoing conflict between the Tanningroves and the Hopfields, Amy has been profiting, but at the cost of much sleep. Maybe today she’ll finally be able to enjoy a day off. [*sleep-deprived fistbump*]
My Reasoning
A section I include purely because I don’t like feeling stupid: therefore when I’m wrong, I prefer people to at least see the logic I followed to arrive at my conclusion.
Leads
Robert Dudley and Henry Carry are both mentioned by name in the scenario, so they’re obviously leads, and Queen Elizabeth is sort of, well, Queen Elizabeth.
Combat
Bev Tanningrove – Tanningrove Family Muscle: character description puts her pretty firmly in the combat territory; Sunny Vinsavich’s resume backs this up with necessary training/abilities.
Sylvia Forel – Sword Mistress: character description puts her pretty firmly in the combat territory; Emily Wirthwein’s resume backs this up with necessary training/abilities.
Mary McBride – Dance Mistress of the Shire: character description puts her pretty firmly in the combat territory; Mel Angelo’s resume seems to back this up with necessary training/abilities.
Fan Liu – Pirate: character description indicates combat as a definite possibility; Ilana Lo‘s resume backs this up with SO MUCH necessary training/abilities; character seems to fit better into the pattern of the combat track than the pattern of the improv track.
Bonnie Buchanna – Pirate: character description indicates combat as a definite possibility; Leigh Loureiro‘s resume indicates potential necessary physicality; character seems to fit better into the pattern of the combat track than the pattern of the improv track
Mistress Quickley – Tavern Keeper: can’t freaking find a resume for Amanda Darrigo, but in my PARF experience, tavern-keepers tend to be involved in brawls and melees, thus indicating combat track.
Captain James Thatch – Captain of The Queen's Vengeance: character description indicates combat as a definite option; can’t find a resume for Sean Besecker, but did find a facebook post mentioning his participation in leading a stage-combat workshop alongside Sam Little, thus implying the necessary training/abilities; character seems to fit better into the pattern of the combat track than the pattern of the improv track.
Bartholomew Wainwright – Yeoman: though character description does not necessarily indicate active combat role, one would imagine a yoeman to be involved in combat, and I know past casts have included combat-track yeomen; Matthew Glen Clark‘s resume backs this up with necessary training and physicality.
Edward Mawson – First Mate: character description does not necessarily indicate active combat role, and I was completely unable to find any sort of resume for Austin James, but the character seems to fit into the pattern of the combat track well enough, so it’s my best guess.
Music
(hardly challenging, as I mentioned, yet shall display my reasoning anyway)
Captain Sheena Daley O'Connell – Captain of The Unyeilding Tempest: woman pyrate whose character description matches the format of the other Sirens’.
Captain Scarlett Seymour – Captain of The Shadow of Prophecy: woman pyrate whose character description matches the format of the other Sirens’.
Captain Ruth "The Blade" Gibson – Captain of The Jolly Walrus: woman pyrate whose character description matches the format of the other Sirens’, plus we already know Megan Jones is music-track certified, so to speak.
Captain Elanor Keetly – Captain of The Malevolence: woman pyrate whose character description matches the format of the other Sirens’, plus we already know Sarah Williams is both music-track certified and Siren certified.
Siobhán O'Sullivan – Royal Music Tutor: surname matches that of the four Irish characters listed as “musician”.
Gilda O'Sullivan – Musician: surname matches that of the other Irish characters listed as “musician” or similar; Jordan Bell is already both music-track certified and Revel certified.
Alannah O'Sullivan – Musician: surname matches that of the other Irish characters listed as “musician” or similar; Morgan Harwood is already music-track certified.
Keagan O'Sullivan – Musician: surname matches that of the other Irish characters listed as “musician” or similar; Jared Haverdink is already music-track certified.
Deklyn O'Sullivan – Musician: surname matches that of the other Irish characters listed as “musician” or similar.
Sterling Armstrong – Highwayman, Leader of Group: highwayman; we already knew Christoper Burch is music-track capable.
Tucker Abbot – Highwayman, Sterling's Protégé: highwayman; singing is specifically mentioned in description.
Jeremiah Slight – Highwayman, Sterling's Right-Hand Man: highwayman; we already knew Pete Hedberg is very very music-track certified and Rogue certified.
William "Bill" Crimson – Highwayman, former Benadictine Monk: highwayman; we already knew Ian Agnew is both music-track certified and Rogue certified.
Improv
Lady Delores Anne Penburthy – Lady Mayor of Mount Hope: Duh.
William Cecil – Advisor to the Queen: Adam Shepley is historically improv track.
Jacob Perry – Sheriff of Mount Hope: Joe Penn is historically improv track.
Sir William Pickering – Nobleman: Jonathan Handley is historically improv track.
William Shakespeare – Apprentice Glover: character description gives no indication of combat; Rob Condas‘s website extols his improv ability and love of the same.
Christopher "Kit" Marlowe – Playwright: if Shakespeare be improv track, it follows that Marlowe is, too; character description gives no indication of combat.
Gretchen Froman – Heir to the Sausage Throne: one parent is a Blackfryar and the other an improv director, so the statistical likelihood lies with improv; character description gives no indication of combat.
Eskarina Nutter – Wise Woman: character description gives no indication of combat; it makes more sense for a healer-witch-type character to not be combat-focused anyway (though that would make for a really cool character); I could not find any resume for Noelani Stevenson to verify anything one way or another, but I’m relatively confident in my verdict nonetheless.
Stella Hopfield – Bottler: character description gives no indication of combat; Kira Gaudynski’ resume seems to indicate greater improv strength than combat strength.
John Hopfield – Brew Master: character description gives no indication of combat; if the Hopfield matriarch indeed be on improv, it seems to heighten the likelyhood of the Hopfield patriarch being on the same; could not find Ryan Perry’s resume to check training/abilities one way or another.
Sherry Tanningrove – Mistress of the Cellars: character description gives no indication of combat; Katelyn Shreiner‘s resume seems to indicate stronger improv skills than combat skills; following my previous path of reason, if the head Hopfields be on the improv track, likely the head Tanningroves will, too.
Horace Tanningrove – Vinter: character description gives no indication of combat; Michael Stahler‘s resume seems to indicate average stage-combat abilities; once more following my path of reasoning through to the logical conclusion, this other head Tanningrove will likely be on the improv track.
Alright, you stumped me
Theresa Ratchet – Rat Catcher: while Katie Burch has historically been combat-track, the character description gives no indication of combat; moreover, her participation in Theatre in the Mansion indicates to me that she has the necessary abilities for the improv track; neither her website nor twitter reveals anything one way or another; finally, I have a unproven gut instinct that one is more likely to remain on cast more years running if one switches tracks. Verdict? could go either way.
Douglas Johnson – Master Thief: George Hamilton has been on both the music track and the combat track (though music is here ruled out), and his participation in Theatre in the Mansion indicates to me that he has the necessary abilities for the improv track; thieves of various sorts are often on the combat track, but it seems his main acting partner this year is on improv; I cannot find a website for further information, and his social media reveals nothing. Verdict? six of one, half-a-dozen of the other.
Rose Hopfield – Brewmaster's Daughter: character description indicates a divergence from her parents’ worldview, so while I have her parents under improv, it would make some degree of sense for her to be on a different track; only some degree, though, and character description does not indicate combat; Shannon Holder‘s resume seems to indicate possibility in either track. Verdict? honestly probably improv but there is wiggle-room.
Jack Tanningrove – Vinter's Son: character description indicates a divergence from his parents’ worldview, so while I have his parents under improv, it would make some degree of sense for him to be on a different track; only some degree, though, and character description does not indicate combat; I could not find a resume for Jesse Kortus to check training/abilities either way. Verdict? yeah prolly improv but who knows.
Charles Kent – Yeoman: though character description does not necessarily indicate active combat role, one would imagine a yoeman to be involved in combat, and I know past casts have included combat-track yeomen; however, John Surgener’s resume seems to me to lean more toward improv than combat, though he has some degree of experience in both. Verdict? heck if I know.
Amy Cooper – Cooper: character description does not indicate combat; Haley Ward’s resume indicates the necessary training/ability for combat; the character description gives me improv-track vibes somehow. Verdict? yeah at this point your guess is as good as mine.
Phew! That’s more than long enough for one day, so the Blackfryars shall get their own post on the morrow (maybe this evening if I’m responsible... haha...).
To the newcomers, welcome! To those returning, welcome back!
#if you'll excuse me i'll be over here being EXCITED as HECK#man this took me ages#they posted the cast while i was at work on tuesday#i couldn't look at it until 9pm-something#and despite working on this post until 3am-something i couldn't finish it at the time#so then i slept in on wednesday and only got a few hours of work in on it before my evening rehearsal#and i finally finished it a couple hours after rehearsal by which time it was 11pm#and i'd rather post it during the day since more people in the relivent timezone will see it then#so yeah. castlist released on tuesay; post up on thursday#i have many things to say -- even more than my little bracket asides have already said -- but that may be fodder for future posts#for my next trick i will reformat this post to work within the limitations of facebook#yikes#bacchanalians#cast list#casting#parf casting#parf cast 2019#parf 2019#parf#pa ren faire#pa renn faire#pa renaissance faire#pennsylvania renaissance faire#renaissance faire#renn faire#ren faire#faire#here's a health to the queuempany
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Aoaoao, what a great ask 😄 If it's not a lot, I'd like you to answer all these questions (ex.60, cause I dunno what to ask here) 😘
1. selfie
(not a selfie but I really like this pic (this is the jacket of one of my best friends btw))
2. what would you name your future kids?
Rosa or Paul
3. do you miss anyone?
not at the moment
4. what are you looking forward to?
more sleep and money
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
my best friends
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?
yes, I need a lot of time
7. what was your life like last year?
very funny and cool
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
oh yes
9. who did you last see in person?
my mom I think
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?
yep
11. are you listening to music right now?
yes, I'm listing to Hot Mess by GIRLI
12. what is something you want right now?
sweet potato fries
13. how do you feel right now?
relaxed
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
idk
15. personality description
perfectionist, but lazy
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?
yes, I had a crush on my best friend but I didn't tell her
17. opinion on insecurities
they suck
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?
nope, I'm happy how my life is now
19. have you ever been to New York?
nope
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?
Deutschland by Rammstein
21. age and birthday?
15 and 02.07.
22. description of crush
i don't have a crush on anyone rn
23. fear(s)
I'm afraid of dogs and height
24. height
157 cm
25. role model
Rosa Luxemburg and Frida Kahlo
26. idol(s)
Rammstein, Rosa Luxemburg, Frida Kahlo
27. things i hate
Nazis
28. i’ll love you if…
🤷♀️
29. favourite film(s)
Lord of the Rings,
30. favourite tv show(s)
Hannibal, The Act, Sherlock
31. random facts
due personal reasons I need 5 cats and 2 week sof sleep
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?
3 girls, 2 boys
33. something you want to learn
how to braid my own hair
34. most embarrassing moment
idk
35. favourite subject
history
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?
1. visite a Rammstein concert
2. get enough sleep
3. meet Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
37. favourite actor/actress
Mads Mikkelsen, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hiddleston, Emilia Clarke
38. favourite comedian(s)
Max Uthoff,
39. favourite sport(s)
I hate every kind of sports
40. favourite memory
idk
41. relationship status
single
42. favourite book(s)
Lord of the Rings, Rosa, Den Mund voll ungesagter Dinge, The Hate U Give
43. favourite song ever
uhh, I can't choose, maybe "Wachstum über alles" by Saltatio Mortis or "Engel" by Rammstein
44. age you get mistaken for
14 or 16/17
45. how you found out about your idol
internet
46. what my last text message says
digga
47. turn ons
deep voice and confidence
48. turn offs
nazis and arrogance
49. where i want to be right now
with my friends
50. favourite picture of your idol
51. starsign
cancer
52. something i’m talented at
writing, eating and sleeping
53. 5 things that make me happy
1. eating
2. my friends
3. studying history
4. reading
5. cats
54. something thats worrying me at the moment
climate change and nazis
55. tumblr friends
@schuspriemanenzand
56. favourite food(s)
pizza, burger, sweet potato fries
57. favourite animal(s)
cats
58. description of my best friend
dumb, funny, sarcastic, feminst, poetry slammer, did i mention dumb, blonde, loves dancing, interested in politics
59. why i joined tumblr
I have no fucking idea
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