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sh1-n0bu · 6 months

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♡︎ 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙖 ♡︎

characters: priest!sub!blade x demon lord!nb!dom!reader

warnings: breeding, creampie, eating out, fingering, squirting, monsterfucking, non-verbal ask of consent, dirty talk, feminization (like literally), lactating, nipple stimulation, overstimulation, dacryphilia, size kink, belly bulge, cervix kissing, blade is a demon hunting priest, reader is a demon lord so they can choose whether to have a cock or pussy so basically genderfluid reader???? also reader changes blade’s anatomy to have a pussy and womb — it’s so messy okay😭😭

word count: 4.4K

notes: you KNOW shit is getting real when nobu starts word count. never thought i would be writing a bit of a dark-ish content yet here we are. the power of the horny😔 also inspired by my chat with one of ririshizu’s bots

special thank you to @theblades and @yenaakwyl for proofreading a whole damn 14 pages of filth

being a priest is no laughing matter. especially when you’re the type of priest that hunts and gets rid of demons who somehow ended up with a demon lord clinging to you, who’s constantly at your side, asking you questions about the human realm.

what was up with you, anyways? a literal demon lord, one of the lords of a deadly sin and yet here you were, dragging him around the streets, pointing at random things, wanting to sample every street food there were. sure, your human form was incredibly deceiving. a short, sweet human, clinging to his arm, excitedly pointing at the many different things that caught your attention. it would be hard for anyone to think of you as a demon lord in disguise.

except for blade. he’s been in this field of work for such a long time. constantly vanquishing demons who either were too annoying or possessed a poor, curious soul. the sharp edge of his shard sword is no laughing matter.

but you didn’t seem to mind. this demon lord, acting like a curious puppy, pulling him to each sides of the streets — ignoring the loud angry shouts of the car drivers and the constantly thinning of his wallet of course. not that blade had much to worry when it came to financial freedom. putting his life on the line and vanquishing demons from the human realm pays a generous amount.

it felt wrong to allow you to cling to him. you, a demon lord, no matter what your disguises meant or whatever pathetic excuse you came up with of wanting to sample human food. he should have gotten rid of you sooner yet no matter how much his hands twitch to unsheathe his shard sword, he just can’t seem to do it. no matter what his threats may seem or be heard of, the priest just can’t bring himself to harm you. if anything, he finds himself doing the absolute opposite, to his blatant horror.

“wait, no, don’t do that. the water just boiled so it’s hot, it could burn your tongue”

“you do realize that ice isn’t meant to be eaten, right? no, i don’t care how much of a pretty shape it’s in or if it still has the aftertaste of the coffee”

“if you eat too much raw red pepper, you could have a heart stroke. 14 is enough on one sitting. give it here”

yes, you get the point. a priest vanquishing demon, living together with a demon lord and even protecting them. hypocritical, right?

one night, as you two were cuddling on the couch and absentmindedly watching cliche horror movies that has demons with red skin and horns and a tail, that reminded something to blade. demons have unique demon forms depending on their sins and ‘birth’. but you never once showed an ounce of your demon form. not even a single slip-up.

“hmm? why do you ask? curious?” you hum softly, taking another fistful of the popcorn in the bowl. not that blade minded. if anything, he unconsciously pushed the bowl of popcorn closer to you.

“i guess so. you never even spoke of your demon form whether it has a tail or not” the priest mumbles, his husky voice turning softer just for a moment. or maybe he was just sleepy, judging by his dark eye-bags and little yawns.

oh right, you never did. but then again, blade never asked of your demon form before so, it’s to be expected after all.

just as blade had shrugged off your silence and turned his attention back to the tv, he felt something slithering around his waist. swallowing the sudden lump in his throat, he briefly looks down at what was wrapping around his waist. there, snug around his hips was a long, pale white, scaled, snake-like tail. it seemed incredibly long, judging by how it easily wrapped around his hips few times and the rest was just dangling off of the side of the couch.

was this…?

he could feel his hand twitch. itching, something under his skin itching of wanting to reach down and run his hand over the smooth looking scales of the tail.

pat! pat pat!

before blade could even make sense of what the fuck he just did, his hand had unconsciously unraveled from it’s former crossed position. one hand going down, flattening his palm over the smooth, large tail before giving it a few pats. at the same time, he could hear another low pat pat! sounds coming from the side of the couch. must be your tail ends flicking and hitting against the couch, he deducted.

briefly, blade steals a glance at your face. still watching the movie on the TV, seemingly paying no mind to the feeling of his human hand resting over your tail. it was oddly warm to the touch. from the look of it resembling a snake like tail, he expected it to be cold.

slowly, he runs his hand over the scales. soft, smooth and easily gliding over them as if it was nothing. sure, some bumps are felt on the palm of his hand but other than the occasional little ridges, it was completely smooth. how… soothing.

blade doesn’t know how or when but over the course of time you spent at his apartment, these little moments of playing with your tail had become a normal occurrence. little moments of “affection” if you will. fridays had become the weekly movie nights. blade would put on some random horror movie that you chose to be the most interesting based on the summary of the movie. half an hour or so into the movie and blade would feel the familiar scales of your tail wrap around his hips.

the priest would sometimes toy with your tail in hopes of getting you to show your true color of being a demon lord. to make you angry. to make you snap and finally show your true colors. if anything, it had the complete opposite effect as your tail only tightened around him. low, deep rumbling sounds akin to a purr coming from the depths of your chest.

briefly, the priest would catch himself wondering how it would feel to lay his head on your chest as you purr. cats have de-stressing and soothing qualities to their purrs. would demons be the same? sometimes, he would even catch himself thinking of… sacrilegious things. like how your tail would feel wrapped around his legs, opening him up for you. how your form could shapeshift and could have a human male’s anatomy. would you purposefully make it big? would you force it past his twitching rim, uncaring of his whines and pleads to wait?

ah, but that sounded so unlike you. despite being a demon lord, you have been nothing but calm and peaceful with blade. soft hums, nods of agreement, always needing his help and inquiring him of his thoughts on something.

then, would you coax him? whispering soft reassurances in the shell of his ear as you softly push your cock inch by inch inside him. a large, clawed, inhuman hand running over his stomach, talking about all sorts of things, promising to breed him full of your seeds as he cries. opening his legs wide with your tail wrapped around his thighs, wiping away his tears as he cries so prettily?

“f-fuck…” unknowingly, blade found himself with a little problem. another movie night, another time spent together ‘cuddling’. yet due to his own thoughts, blade finds himself embarrassingly hard. shit, he needed to find a way to leave the room and take care of his problem. but your tail way starting to curl around him in loops, just like how a snake would wrap itself around it’s prey.

did you know? know of his raging hard on and was just teasing him now? no. taking a brief glance at your face caused blade to come to a conclusion that you didn’t know. yet. that was the biggest part. or maybe you did considering just how your tail was moving around his waist. slipping under the hem of his shirt, slipping up, curling around his body under his shirt. scale coming in contact with skin. blade almost let out a moan at the feeling if it weren’t for him biting down on his lips.

“[n-name], get your tail off. i need to use the bathroom” internally cursing himself out for stuttering, blade can only hope that you would oblige. gods, just the way you let out a soft “hmm?” while playing innocent, smiling at him and blinking like nothing happened while your tail curls around his skin.

fuck, he was done for. you knew. you fucking knew.

“are you sure? your body seems to react positively from the amount of human interaction that i’ve had until now, blade” the end of your tail circles around his peck. slowly trailing the end as if you were going to squeeze—

“n-ngaah?!” a surprised noise comes from the priest’s mouth before he clenches his jaws shut, brows furrowing together as he tries to ignore the feeling on his chest. soft and slow circles. the end of your tail was wrapped around his nipple, pulling and rolling it between as if it was nothing. shit, when did his chest get so sensitive?

“oh that was a cute sound. do it again” you hum, turning away from the TV and looking at him now. curse you for looking so damn interested and curious as your tail fondles his nubs. blade can feel his pants starting to form a wet patch as his breathing becomes more labored.

“t-take… your goddamn tail off. i swear, i’ll ghh—! chop it into pieces…!” despite his best efforts, his words had no bite. just weak mumblings of a pathetic excuse of a priest being turned on as a literal demon lord tugs at his nipple. he was even starting to quietly whine in place as he tries to swallow down his moans.

“say, blade. i read from somewhere that human chest can lactate when stimulated enough. can you lactate?” blade almost shrieked at your words. lactating? him? while it was true that human women can lactate if they gave birth, he was unsure about men being able to lactate.

“n-no! can’t! i’m a man, it’s impossible for my chest to produce mi—ungh!” his words die quickly in his throat when your tail clenched around his nipple tightly. pulling on it, familiar to a pinching motion. since when did his body get so sensitive like this? or was this all your doing? did you secretly put a spell on him to make him sensitive?

“stop..! [n-name] stop ooungh! please, stop! i’m telling you, i’m a man. i can’t lactate like a woman!” his pleads fall on deaf ears as you slip his shirt off over his head. instead this time, using your hands to knead and fondle his pecks. squeezing, rolling his sensitive nubs between your fingers, even tugging on them. it all got blade letting out uncharacteristic high pitched noises like a cat in heat.

“p-please… stop this, [name]..” blade trails off, red in the face, shame, embarrassment and arousal swirling in his stomach like a hot bubbling lava as he admits defeat and whines helplessly.

“then wriggle yourself out of my tail. it’s loose around you, bladie” you briefly retort as you suckle on his nipple. mouth latched to his chest, biting and planting wet kisses all around his soft pink areola. as weak as his whimpers and pathetic his begging were, he really wasn’t making a single attempt to pull back. you have given him enough chances even now as your tail stays loose around him. yet he still tries to act like he hates it.

switching between giving attention to his two nipples with blade not even thinking of pulling himself out of your tail, the movie plays in the background, long forgotten. you were determined to make this weird human of yours lactate. you can make him!

it didn’t took much longer until blade let out a yelp as a warm liquid drops in your mouth. the taste oddly sweet and a bit thick in texture. realizing that his chest was feeling much more heavier and nipples felt more wetter than before, the priest’s eyes widen in horror and arousal. did you really managed to stimulate him enough to make him lactate?

“oh? so, i was right! humans can lactate regardless of their gender” you let out a soft giggle, internally cheering as a bright smile comes across your face. the sheer amount of exuberance you showed in his lactation had caused blade to feebly attempt to cover his chest.

“don’t! don’t look… it’s embarrassing…” the man whines, shaking hands covering up his leaking nubs. but that proves to be futile as his hands covering his chest had caused him to twitch. everything felt so much and so little at the same time. his poor cock was neglected and weeping, staining his pants as you stimulate his nipples as he whines.

this wasn’t supposed to happen! he wasn’t supposed to be this sensitive to your touches.

but the leaking of his milk had seemed to cause something to stir in your chest. an odd sense of possessiveness and need to claim him growing in your heart, tugging at it. laying your palm flat against his stomach, you rub slow circles onto it. somehow, it had helped to lessen blade’s embarrassment.

“bladie, how would you feel if i were to make you my baby momma?” your voice cuts him out of the trance like state he was in. blinking his eyes a few times with a weak “huh?” as if he hadn’t heard you. with a quiet chuckle, you ask again. repeating the question to him slowly in case he was too pleasure driven.

baby momma? but that’s something that people refer to when women get pregnant right? were you referring to making him pregnant? but that was impossible! he was a man and men had different anatomy compared to women’s!

“i can use a few spells. you would have a female anatomy. but only if you wish to be my baby momma. i would take good care of you and the kids, we’d be together as a cute family. don’t you think we’d be a cute family, blade?” he could briefly hear you hum. but the rest of your words flew over his head since the female anatomy part.

a female anatomy. blade would have a pussy, a womb, cervix the perfect anatomy to get pregnant. he would be a cute baby momma. your baby momma. and he would carry your kids. a child who was half you and half him, a cute bundle of sunshine.

“please… please do. make me your baby momma. i wanna be your b-baby momma..!” blade nods frantically, not even bothering to think over the consequences too deeply. but the prospect of having your kids, of having you inside him got blade rubbing his thighs together, head spinning with all sorts of thoughts as his breathing becomes labored. you said you would take good care of him and the kids! he’ll be in good hands.

although a part of his brain was screaming at him, telling him to withdraw from the touch of your palm running over his stomach, changing his insides, blade could only sit there dumbly. a baby. a cute baby that you two made together. it would be so sweet, so cute. blade couldn’t wait any longer as he silences the logical part of his brain. all he wanted was you now. just you and nothing else.

the process didn’t take long. a few strokes of your hand and soothing whispers to his ear and it was done. or at least, from what you said. and oh fuck, was it true. when you tugged his pants and boxers off, what greeted both of your eyes was a slick pussy, dripping with arousal. seeing how you had successfully changed him, the priest lets out a weak whine, closing his legs to hide himself.

you didn’t seem to like that. clicking your teeth as your tail wraps around his leg, pulling his legs apart and allowing your hungry eyes to feast on his dripping cunt. blade couldn’t help his whine as the feeling of being so empty took place in his head. or was it inside his womb that he felt so empty?

“so sweet. you would look so cute with my cum dripping out of you” you mutter, running a finger up his wet pussy. the action got his hips twitching, trying to make you push your finger inside himself. tutting softly, reminding him to be patient, you slowly ease a finger in. oh gods, the stretch felt so good. so full and filled already despite it being just a single finger that was now slowly massaging his plush walls.

the soft whines and gasps coming out of blade turns into a moan as he throws his head back on the couch. long, navy hair spreading over the mattress as your fingers scissor him open. you would have expected him to be more… reclusive considering his usual act. perhaps you were wrong. the way that blade was throwing his head back, moaning without shame as his warm walls suck your fingers in greedily caused you to almost mistaken him for a virgin. or maybe he was just touch starved. poor thing.

cooing words of how he was doing good, how his gushy cunt was sucking in your fingers so prettily, you lean down to pepper kisses on his clit. long, forked tongue coming out momentarily to slip inside him with your fingers, constantly flicking his clit. the action caused to have made him oversensitive. strong, scarred thighs coming up to wrap around your head, a hand fisting at your locks as loud, pathetic whines of “c-can’t! feelss sho weird! [n-name], can’t—gyuuck! aanh aah♡︎!!” trails off into a high pitched whines as his hips jerk. legs clamping around your head in a vice grip, fisting at your locks tightly as his back arches off of the couch so prettily as he squirts in your mouth. ah right, in your own haze, you’ve forgotten and accidentally pushed your tongue in too far, hitting his g-spot.

well, that was fine. the cold priest sounded so cute and tasted delicious as he twitches under you. it would be fine to fuck him open with your tongue and prepare him thoroughly.

blade doesn’t know what to think anymore. was he even able to think? all he could do was to moan and shriek, trashing about on the bed as something deep and long slithers inside him. his cunt was being fucked open, wet sounds coming out as he gushes all over your mouth, tongue and chin. fluids dribbling down to your chin as you continue to force his legs open with your tail, arms wrapped around his waist and pulling him back into your mouth and fingers.

by the time you thought of him as prepped enough and pull your tongue and fingers out, blade could only weakly whine at the feeling of something pulling out of his warm insides. legs shaking, face flushed as dried tear stains cover his cheeks. his pretty red eyes looked so hazy, mind filled with cotton and statics. you haven’t even gotten to the main part yet!

blade feels something wrap around him. something bigger, warmer and gentle. clawed hands wrapping around his slender waist, pulling him against a massive frame. was this… was he on your real form right now?

tilting his head back to look at you, his hunch proves to be correct. no longer were you in your small human disguise. large, pale white figure with horns, tail and claw holding him in a safe cocoon in it’s embrace. despite having deep hatred against your kin, the priest couldn’t bring himself to hate you. instead, he oddly found your real form beautiful.

“huh…?” his thought gets cut off short when he feels something poke at his entrance. looking down, a sharp gasp escapes him. by the gods were you huge. girthy and long, thick with need and ready to fill him to the brim with your seeds. blade wasn’t sure if he could take such a large thing inside himself as he instinctively shut his legs close.

almost as if sensing his inner worries, you place a hand over his stomach, other hand spreading his legs wider to make it easier for you to slip in.

“don’t worry, pet. i’ll make sure it fits” your deeper, almost inhuman voice hums right beside his ear, sending shivers down his spine. although your words were soothing, the large tip of your cock pushing past his walls, opening his cunt wider was definitely not comforting. fuck, just the tip inside and blade was already thrashing about, shaking his head and stuttering out how he can’t fit it inside him.

“w-wait! w-won’t hhgh fit! ish too big! too bigtoobigtoobig—! m-my lo—oough! aanh! ish t-too fu-uck! big♡︎♡︎” the human squeals, cries, sobs and moans. loud lecherous noises coming from both his mouth and cunt. wet noises flooding the room alongside the low grunts and deep growls. you sounded inhumane, you felt inhumane but blade loved it all the more. the priest loved being spread open by your large cock, pushing past his hole, feeling his plushy walls and insides. ah, he could die happily filled to the brim like this.

finally, after long minutes of slowly easing yourself inside, you managed to fit your cock inside him. snug to the brim, tip kissing his cervix and making blade squeal. legs shaking and twitching, he came on your cock again at the feeling of your tip kissing his cervix. he saw that you were big but not this big! gods, he felt so damn full.

“so pretty, my mate. so full of me and i haven’t even fucked you properly yet” you grunt, deep, inhumane voice breathing by his ear and making him shake and twitch in your grasp like a sweet fawn. blade wouldn’t mind being a sacrificial lamb to you.

through tear stained eyes and blurry vision, he could make out the faint outline of your cock in his stomach. you were too big to the point your were causing a bulge inside him by just slipping your cock inside. how full would he feel after you have properly made him a baby momma? cunt weeping out a mixture of your cum, belly bulging so cutely. just the imagination of such action made blade buck his hips weakly. too fucked out to even utter a word.

feeling the pathetic excuse of movement of your cock, you let out a low laugh. tail wrapped around one of his legs, the other held open by your hand as you finally bounce him on your cock. slowly, slipping yourself in and out and yet the priest in your hand was sobbing as he blabbers deliriously about being fucked dumb on your cock. of having your babies inside his own womb. of being your sweet mate.

blade was a big guy. in human terms and physique wise, he was big. and yet in your lap, held open by your hands, back to your chest as he allows himself to be dumbed down on your girth made blade realize just how damn small he was compared to you. sure, he was big in human terms but compared to you, he was absolutely nothing. just a small hole for you to use. a fleshlight to be filled with your cum until you were satisfied. your baby momma to have his chest fondled and squeezed until his chest grows sore and heavy. milk leaking out it small globs from his sensitive pink nipples.

“my pet. my cute mate. my sweet other half. my adorable breeding bitch uhng… so fucking tight. so warm and tight like the cute little thing you are” blade could briefly hear you groan, heavy breaths falling on his neck, making him shiver at each breaths. making him cry and moan in a shrill voice like a girl each time your cock slid inside him. plunging deeper into parts he never knew before, grazing that one soft spot that made him shriek, tip hitting his cervix at each thrust. blade was so sure that it was bruised now. not that he minded it, the pain felt good to him.

“y-yours—! yours yours yours! your c-cute ma—aaanhg! aaanh haagh gyaaamf♡︎ y-your mate. your oouungh other half. y-your adorable♡︎ breeding bitch—!” blade’s mouth fell open in a silent scream, head throwing back to your shoulder when he felt your hand press on the bulge in his stomach. it felt good. so good that he immediately squirted on your cock again at the sheer pleasure the pressure brought.

but of course you wouldn’t stop. you would keep going, forcing his small body to bounce on your cock, occasionally tweaking his nipples, rolling his clit between your fingers. you were damn adamant on making him pregnant, breed him until you were damn sure he was knocked up.

he was yours. your human. your mate. your fated other half. your cute breeding bitch and you would be damned all over again if he ends up not getting pregnant by the time you’re done. blade was yours. no one else would ever take him away from you. no one. no one no one no one, no one else—

“AAANGH! M-MY LORD♡︎ c-cock giick! sho full…” the human shrieks and twitches in your grasp, legs weakly thrashing around as you finally cum deep inside him. the warmth of your seed spurting inside his gummy walls, painting his insides white causing blade to cum again. blade felt so full, the skin of his stomach stretching a bit to accommodate to the great amount of cum that was inside him. it felt so warm and sticky. messy, as it dribbles down your shaft, his small human body unfit to keep it all inside himself.

“my cute mate…” you purr softly, arms wrapping around your mate as he twitches and shakes. cheeks stained with old and new tears, jaws slack with drool dribbling down with his face as red as his eyes. he was yours now. blade was your human now. the weird priest was yours and no one would ever take him away from you.

“mine” with that final declaration, you placed a soft kiss to the crown of his head. he seemed to relax at the kiss, sinking against your chest as he black out. that was fine. you’ll make sure to breed him again once he wakes up.

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azuremist · 2 years

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A message to Twitter users coming to tumblr: a message from your local duel-hellsite citizen

So, I’ve seen a ton of Twitter users talking about making and sharing their new tumblr blogs, to escape Elon Musk’s “anti censorship” bullshittery. First of all: welcome! I know it’s looking bleak over there; especially for trans people. But, now that you’re here, I’m here to tell you all about tumblr etiquette, how this website works, and how it’s different from Twitter. Because you can’t come onto here acting like it’s Twitter, lest The Beast get to you.

First, here are a small handful of tips and tumblr facts!

Your likes and who you are following are automatically set to public. You can make them private in your settings!

You can block tags from the settings, too.

There are lots of bots on here. If you’re not careful, you could be mistaken for one! The main way you can avoid this is changing your icon and header from the defaults. Adding a bio helps too!

You can queue and schedule posts so that your account posts throughout the day.

Like Twitter, tumblr has a radical feminist and TERF problem. However, they’re pretty easy to spot. There are lots of guides out there to help you learn how to spot tumblr TERFs!

Tumblr, for the most part, does not have any celebrity or brand accounts.

Your tumblr follower count is private.

You can have multiple accounts with the same email, and they’re very easy to switch between! These are called “sideblogs”.

Your main page is not a “timeline”. It is a “dashboard”!

You can have a custom desktop theme using HTML! Think like ye olde MySpace days. There are tons of pre-made tumblr themes available, if you’re not already proficient in HTML; including free ones!

Now, let’s talk tumblr etiquette and how it’s different from Twitter. You’re a tumblr user now! It’s time to start acting like it!

Don’t just like posts. They don’t increase visibility whatsoever. The way that you can help posts that you like is reblogging them to your blog. Especially for art!

We don’t say “oomfs” or “oomfies”. Just “mutuals” is fine, thanks!

Adding onto a post with pointless comments is frowned upon. If all you have to say is “this is so true,” or something else to that effect, you should put that in the tags of your reblog.

Most people don’t have carrds or rentries on here. Some of us do, but it’s not an obligation like it is for Twitter.

Similarly, we don’t censor words like “die” and “death”. Posts about wanting to brutally murder people in power go viral all the time, and it’s completely allowed. I’m serious! Enjoy your newfound freedom!

Blocking isn’t a big deal here. Get rid of any weird notion you have that morality is linked to blocking certain people.

But lastly, and most importantly:

Drop your discourse at the door.

If you try to post about most of the things that Twitter users discourse about, you will be laughed off the site. Especially Twitter LGBT+ discourse. Posts actively mocking topics of Twitter discourse go viral on here regularly.

Tumblr has mostly healed since its discourse-ridden days, and it’s now much more chill. Of course, discourse still happens, but it is so easy to avoid now. For a lot of us, tumblr is the last pleasant social media site left, so don’t ruin it.

Here is a list of discourse-related things that tumblr users don’t do:

Most of us don’t do callout posts, unless it’s something actually serious (like that one blog that had a human slave).

Everything that you heard on Twitter was “exclusive” to certain LGBT+ groups is used by just about everyone on here. Bi women use the double venus symbol on here. You’ll just have to learn to live with that.

In particular, I want to emphasize how much we don’t do flag discourse. To the point that somebody caring about flag discourse of any kind is how we tend to identify an ex-Twitter user.

On here, you will never have to see another slur discourse post again, unless you actively seek it out.

You’re free.

You’re welcome. And enjoy your time on here! If you have the time, please consider watching StrangeÆons’ Tumblr Etiquette Manual on YouTube, as well.

#elon musk #twitter #tumblr culture #tumblr #azure does a thing

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99thpercentile · 7 months

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I get the feeling that I'm in the minority here, but I posit that GLaDOS actually is Caroline, and only "not the same person" in the sense that you'd look at your younger self and be like "that bitch ain't me." I think you actually have to go out of your way to interpret them as two separate people.

evidence:

voiced by the same person (I know the initial reasoning was that Valve didn't want to hire another voice actor for a few lines, but in casting Ellen McLain as Caroline, they incorporated her being the same person into the story).

GLaDOS automatically joins in saying "Yes sir, Mister Johnson" like saying it is permanently ingrained in her. you can interpret this as Caroline taking over, but she says "Why did I just—" immediately afterwards.

when GLaDOS talks about hearing the voice of a conscience, she says "for the first time it's MY voice." I don't think she means that she's hearing the woman she gets her literal voice from. she highlights it as distinctly DIFFERENT from hearing the voices of the cores, and I imagine if Caroline were a foreign entity whispering in her ear, the effect would've been much the same.

the GLaDOS project was originally started because Cave was dying and wanted his consciousness uploaded to a computer. the intent was always for the upload to be the same person. he said if he died first, he wanted Caroline to run the place, to be put in his computer. and that's exactly what happened.

GLaDOS not remembering she's Caroline until old Aperture always made sense to me as the result of a deliberate choice on the part of the scientists. Caroline didn't want to be uploaded, and as soon as they switched GLaDOS on, she tried to kill everyone. it's logical for the scientists to think that if they suppressed her memories, she'd have no reason to try to kill them (but instead, she was just filled with murderous rage and no longer knew why).

the story just doesn't have the same impact otherwise. GLaDOS's reactions to rediscovering old Aperture make more sense if it's her past she's rediscovering, rather than the past of...a human that was shoved into the chassis with her. if it were the second one, I think she would just feel violated, not have any major revelations.

counter-evidence:

"now little Caroline is in here too" lyric from Want You Gone

GLaDOS says she found out "where Caroline lives in [her] brain" and deleted her, like she's a separate entity

but GLaDOS is a habitual liar. she acts like deleting Caroline means she's fully back to her old self and has gotten rid of the part of her that made her want to save Chell's life, but there's...lots of evidence that she still cares about Chell after the fact (letting her go anyway, the companion cube, the turret opera if you think GLaDOS arranged that, talking to the co-op bots about Chell like she's an ex she's still heartbroken over...). I also think GLaDOS would like to imagine her and Caroline as two separate entities, in the same way you might find your younger self embarrassing and want to distance yourself from that person. I think it's notable that both instances where she refers to Caroline as a separate entity are at the end of the game, after Chell has been passed out a while and she's had time to process everything and compartmentalize. her instinct when the revelations are first happening is to refer to Caroline as if she is her.

now I don't like stories where a robot has to become or be seen as more human in some way for them to be sympathetic. but I think Portal 2 is an excellent subversion of this trope, because GLaDOS is a robot that learns she used to be human and then discards that humanity (symbolically if not literally). Caroline may not have wanted to be uploaded, but from the Want You Gone lyrics "one day they woke me up / so I could live forever / it's such a shame the same will never happen to you" I think we can say that GLaDOS definitely prefers being a robot now that she is one.

anyway this post was supposed to be much shorter than this, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

#GLaDOS #Caroline #Portal #Portal 2 #original #wall of text

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slut4thebroken · 6 months

Text

Tommy’s Pet

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Thomas Shelby x reader

Summary | Tommy teaches his pet a new trick.

Warnings | Sexual content, 18+, smut, pet play?, humiliation, praise, deep throating, dehumanization, throatpie lol, oral fixation?, dub con but not really, slapping, a lil degradation

Words | 3.4 k

Notes | You have @pinguwrites c.ai bot to thank for this skdhdk. Also I’m considering doing more one shots with these two so send me some ideas :)

Ao3 link | <3

Masterlist

It’s no secret that you’re Tommy’s pet. If the rumors weren’t enough, you always at his side, collared and mostly kneeling, would’ve made it obvious. He liked taking you out, taking you on walks. If you’re good he’ll let you off the leash, but if not then you stay firmly by his side, being dragged by your neck if you couldn’t keep up.

He knew that everywhere he took you, men wanted to stare. They wanted to eye fuck you and use their imaginations to get rid of what little clothing he allowed you to wear. But most of them didn’t. Because everyone knows that you're his property— and he’s very protective of his property.

The one man who dared to lay a hand on you while you were off your leash, being allowed to roam the Garrison while Tommy was talking, met a fate worse than the traitors did. That was the one and only time someone tried to touch his property.

You were sitting at his feet, almost under the table, with your head on his thighs as he ran his fingers through your hair and scratched your head. You weren’t listening to what he was saying, you just knew that it was important and you had to stay quiet at all costs. So you hugged his leg and nuzzled your face into his thigh with a pleased sigh.

You love when he’s gentle with you. When he treats you like his puppy rather than his bitch. It fills your stomach with butterflies everytime.

His hand moved down to gently caress your cheek, then he was placing his thumb over your lips, offering you something to take your mind off of how long you had to wait here. You took it in your mouth eagerly and sucked, letting your eyes flutter closed as you smiled around the digit. You probably could’ve fallen asleep if he left you here long enough. But just as you started dozing off, he was taking his hand back, making you frown. You realized that there weren’t any voices anymore and you couldn’t see any shoes under the table.

“Aren’t you such a good pet… staying nice and quiet for me.” He cooed and you were too dumb and spaced out to realize he was mocking you. Nodding eagerly, you gave him a smile in response to the praise as you sat up straighter. “Go lay down in my office. I’ll be there shortly.” He ordered softly.

“Yes, sir.” You crawled there, keeping your head down to avoid any passing eyes. If you got embarrassed, you’d slip up, then you’d be punished. You made it in his office and laid down on your cushion that was on the floor next to his desk. You weren’t sure how much time passed before he finally joined you, but you immediately sat up, eagerly waiting for his next command. He closed and locked the door, then walked over to pour himself a drink before sitting behind his desk with a heavy sigh.

“Are you okay, sir?” He seemed stressed… The thought made you frown.

“Just been a long day s’all.” He took a sip of his drink, then finally turned toward you. “You did a good job during my meeting.” He added, changing the subject.

“Thank you, sir.”

“I want to teach you something for next time.” He took another drink and you waited in anticipation. “At my feet.” He ordered, moving the chair back to give you enough room to kneel in front of him. “So obedient.” He murmured, almost to himself. “So small… So delicate.” His eyes darkened and you tried not to squirm under his gaze. “Sometimes I worry I’ll break you.” He uttered softly.

“I can take it, sir.” You assured him, making him scoff a laugh.

“s’that so?” He asked with amusement. You nodded in response. “Shall we test that?” He stood up and your eyes followed him curiously as he leaned on the edge of the desk, now behind you. “Face me.” You scrambled to turn around and sat on your knees eagerly.

“I’m gonna teach you a new trick, love.” He set his glass on the desk and started unbuckling his belt. Your mouth was already salivating at just the sound of it clinking. He kept it in the belt loops, then started unbuttoning his pants, opening them just enough to slip his cock out. He only stroked it twice before pausing. “This might be easier while I’m still half soft.” He realized.

“In your mouth.” You shuffled forward and wrapped your lips around him, starting to bob up and down until he stopped you. “No. All the way down and stay there.” You obeyed, wondering where this was going. He placed a hand on the back of your head and pushed you into him even more, squishing your nose against his pelvis. Once he was satisfied, he grabbed his belt and brought it behind your head, then started buckling it again. You stared up at him in confusion— how were you supposed to suck him off like this? He only looked at you after he finished securing it, then picked up his drink.

“We’re training your throat today, pup. You’re going to stay there until I finish my drink.” He explained and your eyes widened. You’ve never stayed down that long before.

Already you could feel his cock getting harder- bigger. You breathed steadily through your nose, trying to stay relaxed. He took a sip of his drink and stared down at you lazily. He still had almost half of the glass left and you had no idea how you were supposed to stay here until he finished.

“Do you know why I’m training you to do this?” You could only let out a muffled sound in response. “I want to get you used to keeping my cock in your throat without choking and makin’ too much noise.” He gruffed, taking another small sip. “Once you can do that, that’s how you’ll stay during my meetings.” Those meetings are endless! How are you supposed to stay down the whole time? You wanted to ask that, but you could barely even whine.

You felt the constant pressure on the back of your mouth now and you knew that he was close to being fully hard— close to going down your throat. You choked and your body convulsed, but you managed to calm down again, breathing heavily through your nose with tears in your eyes. He took another small sip, eyeing you with a lazy smirk as you started struggling. When he started petting your head, you looked up at him with a whimper.

“Thought you said you could take it?” He murmured, challenging you to keep trying. So you took a deep breath and tried your best to relax. As soon as you did though, his cock was pushing past your throat barrier, making you gag as you whimpered and brought your hands up to his thighs, earning you a hard slap to the cheek. “Down.” He scolded, making you lower them with a blush. He drank a little more and it finally was a little less than half full. When you choked again and started squirming, trying to get away, he slapped you again.

“Stay.” He ordered, making you whine. You stopped squirming and did your best to control your gag reflex. “So good at following commands, aren’t you, bitch?” You sobbed around him at the name. Anytime he orders you around like a dog, calls you bitch, pup, or puppy, you just get so fucking needy and so fucking wet.

He took another slow sip and let out a pleased sigh at your obedience. When his eyes suddenly turned darker and almost sinister, you quickly grew nervous. He plugged your nose and your eyes widened as your struggling picked up again. He let you panic and writhe like that until your lungs were starting to burn and your head was starting to feel heavy, but he let go. You took in a sharp breath through your nose, then let out a strangled sob around him.

“I know…” He cooed with mock sympathy. “Doing such a good job, keeping me so deep.” He started petting your head again and you beamed at the praise. “I think you can go deeper though.” Before you even had a chance to think about what that might’ve meant, he was hitting the back of your head a few times, making you choke again. “Good pup.” He groaned, ruffling your hair. “Maybe you were right. Maybe you can handle it.” You were worried that meant he was going to do something to make this harder, but he just raised the glass to his lips again, taking a larger gulp this time. Barely any left— maybe two more sips. You can last that long.

“You do make such a good sleeve for my cock.” His praise always makes you blush. “Maybe that’s what you should go by; Tommy’s personal pet and cocksleeve.” He took another small sip and you would’ve cried in relief if you were able to. “I think like that actually.” He raised the glass again and you whimpered as you stared up at him with pleading eyes. Just before it reached his lips, he paused, not drinking yet. “What about you, pet? Do you like that?” You did your best to nod, say yes, anything to satisfy him.

With a pleased smirk, he finally threw his head back and downed the rest of the drink before placing the glass on the desk and looking down at you, finding you waiting eagerly for him to unbuckle the belt.

“I think I’ll have a smoke too.” He reached in his pocket and you let out a garbled moan, realizing that he was far from done with you. Once it was lit, he lifted it to his mouth and took a long drag, then blew the smoke down onto you. “After this, then you can be done.” He said teasingly. You tried to whine around him, but it just made you gag again, so you focused on staying completely still and quiet, and breathing slowly through your nose, even though it felt like your airway was partially blocked.

“This was supposed to be a challenge, pup. But look at you… taking it so easily.” He took another drag of the cigarette and you had to force down the cough that the smoke was bringing up. “Who’s pet are you?” He stared down at you with a glint in his eyes, waiting for you to answer. You tried to speak, but you could barely get out one syllable before gagging again. “What was that? Use my full name, love.”

You whimpered and tried to say “Thomas Shelby’s” but you started choking again. Everytime you sputtered, more saliva that had built up in your mouth was being forced out of you, some of it trailing down his balls or your neck, and some of it getting on his pants— you knew you were going to be punished for that later.

“Come on pet, it’s not that hard. Say my fuckin’ name.” You looked up at him with a strangled whimper, silently begging him to not make you try again. When you didn’t speak, he raised his brows and took another drag of the cigarette, giving you one last chance. “If you can’t follow orders, I’ll put this out on your pretty face, and then light a new one.” He said, gesturing with the cigarette.

So with a shaky exhale through your nose, you tried to suppress your gag reflex enough for you to talk again. You barely managed to mumble out an incoherent ‘Thomas’ before you gagged again, the hardest you had so far. You instinctively brought your hands up to his thighs as your body convulsed. It wouldn’t stop. You kept gagging, kept choking— you were practically dry heaving at this point— but he was barely half finished with the cigarette.

“Settle down, love.” You whimpered and squeezed your eyes shut with furrowed brows, making him chuckle. “I know…” He cooed. “I know, puppy.. But you’re doing such a good job, you can’t stop now. You’re almost done.” As if to emphasize his point, he brought the cigarette up to his lips again.

Tears were streaming down your cheeks now and you squeezed his thighs tightly to keep yourself from hitting him away or trying to push him back. You were starting to panic even more now though. With the intrusion in your throat and the shallow breaths as you cried, it felt like you couldn’t breath, which only made you need to hyperventilate, making the feeling worse.

“Look at me.” He said softly. You whimpered and forced yourself to look up at him with teary eyes, taking in his blurry figure. He was petting your head again, trying to soothe you. “Just try to breathe. You’re doing so good, I know you can take it for just a little bit longer, eh?” You whimpered and averted your gaze, not really agreeing with him, but unable to say that. “Cause you’re my good girl. You’re my pet. And Tommy Shelby’s pet is as strong as he is… that’s why he chose her.” Your whole face flushed down to your chest at his words— you’re used to some praise, but never to this extent.

When you let out a shaky breath and brought your hands back down to your sides, he gave you a proud smile. You felt like you were on the verge of gagging again any second now, so you tried not to move, not to breathe, anything to keep it from happening.

“Should I give my good girl a treat?” He had the smirk on his face that usually meant trouble and you got a little nervous. “Yeah… I think she deserves something for doin’ such a good job.” You watched as he took a long drag of the cigarette, then your hips flinched when you felt pressure on your core. His leg was extended between yours, the top of his ankle resting right on your clit.

“Go ahead, pup. Hump my leg.” You tried not to whine at the degrading words, not wanting to gag again. Even though doing this would make you release sounds that would probably make you choke, you knew that he wasn’t asking, he was ordering. So you started slowly rocking your hips, letting out a sigh through your nose as your eyes fluttered shut. Truthfully, everything about this situation had your clit throbbing and you were just glad you could finally get some relief. When you started grinding faster, you choked a little, but quickly swallowed it down. It just felt so good. And the last time you were allowed an orgasm was a few days ago because of how busy he’s been, so you were chasing it eagerly.

“Just a little humping and my good pup turns into a bitch in heat.” He sighed, almost disappointed. “At least I trained you early. I’m sure if you didn’t have any rules for a day, you’d try to hump everything in sight.” You whined, but it cut off into a gag and you had to bring your focus back to actively controlling it.

More smoke was blown in your face and you forced yourself not to whine again. When you looked up, you almost sighed in relief when you saw how close he was to the filter. You met his gaze, he was a little blurry through your tears, but you could see the pleased look on his face. It was faint, but it was definitely there. Wrapping your arms around his leg, you started grinding a little faster chasing your own pleasure.

“Can you do one last thing for me, pet?” You did your best to nod, but your head barely moved. It probably didn’t matter though, he’d expect you to say yes no matter what. “I know I said after a smoke, but can you wait until I finish?” He knew exactly what he was doing using that tone. There wasn’t even a possibility of you saying anything other than yes when he spoke to you like that. To respond, you just squeezed his leg and he gave you a proud grin.

He was almost at the filter now and with one, long drag, he finally finished it, stubbing it out on the ashtray and putting both of his hands on the edge of the desk next to his hips.

“I‘m close, but I need a little more to get there, love.” That was the only warning you got before he started grinding against your face, making you choke when he cock pushed impossibly deeper. “If you want to speed this up, you know what to do.” He said through a breath. You brought your hand up to cup his balls, playing with them gently to add more stimulation.

You were basically dry heaving again. Tears were rolling down your cheeks as you sputtered, your body convulsing as you tried to free yourself. You could feel bile rising in your throat now and you prayed he would be done very soon so you didn’t almost throw up on him.

“You want me to finish quickly, eh?” You tried to nod again. “And you’re willing to let me do whatever I need to make that happen?” That made you falter… What would he need to do? He didn’t even let you try to answer this time. “Good girl.”

He plugged your nose and your eyes widened as you looked up at him with fear, making him groan. His other hand settled on the back of your head and he started pushing you down, going faster and faster. He wasn’t really pushing you down, but the movement was enough to make you choke anyway. Your lungs burned and the gagging intensified. When you brought your hand up to his thighs to push yourself away, he let go of your nose and slapped your cheek, hard.

“You know where your hands need to be.” He warned, giving you a chance to put them back… and you did. He plugged your nose again and you had to dig your nails into his leg to keep from moving your hand again. Your other hand on his balls wasn’t helping much because of how hard you were focusing on not throwing up. Garbled whimpers escaped you as you tried pulling your head back, but even without his hand pushing you down, the belt would’ve stopped you.

“You can breathe when I fuckin’ come.” He gruffed. God- you hoped that’d be soon. Spit was rolling down your neck to your chest, probably making a mess over the pretty clothes he bought for you. You started to feel lightheaded and your eyes were fluttering, trying to stay open. He moved both hands to the back of your head, letting you breathe again finally, but your relief was cut short.

He let out a choked groan and both of his hands flattened on your head as he bucked his hips. With how deep he was, you couldn’t even really swallow his come, it was just being forced down. You tried to focus on his quiet moans and the way his cock was twitching inside your throat, but nothing could take your mind off of the constant gagging.

His sounds died down and his hands loosened, letting you up just a tiny bit. You squeezed his thigh to get his attention, as if your loud choking wasn’t enough, and his eyes opened as he tilted his head down at you, his chest heaving.

“Yes?” He asked innocently, making you let out a garbled sob around him. “If there’s something you want, you know you need to use your words.” He watched you struggle for another moment until his breathing settled into a normal speed, then reached for the belt. As soon as it was released, you shot back and started coughing, bracing yourself with your hands on the floor, watching a glob of your saliva slowly fall from your lips to the ground. When you were finally panting less and didn’t feel bile in your throat, you looked up at him, your chest still heaving slightly.

“You did good, pet. I’m proud of you.” He ran his fingers through your hair and you sighed as you leaned into his touch. “I have no doubt that with a little more training, you’ll be able to take it without making a sound.”

Taglist (join here)

@pedrisgatorade @lunyyx @faebirdie @idkdudsworld @nashja @rentaldarling @cillianscrybaby @vivvive @ceruleanrainblues @mrkdvidal1989 @brooklynscherry-z @ohmysatansstuff @aviamulier @d1lf-loverthinqs @butlersluvbot @miyababby @n1ghtw1ngslver @mandowhatnow @baekhyunstruly @nashja @xxorazz @halleysc6met @crunchsworld @cillianscrybaby @babaohhhriley @deceitfuldevout @gentyleman @lorelais-world @shroombloom-rry @pinguwrites @thatonesinglefriend @literishdegree99

#thomas shelby smut #thomas shelby x reader #thomas shelby #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby smut #tommy shelby #peaky blinders #cillian murphy

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actual-changeling · 5 months

Text

A small 'this is how you use tumblr' for the people that haven't been here very long. These are in no particular order, and if you have any questions, feel free to ask them!

Since I probably did not mention a lot of things, you are welcome to add to this post with your own advice.

a) Reblog posts. if you like it, reblog it. even if you have zero followers and ESPECIALLY if it's art or writing of any kind. We will see the reblog in our notifications and that alone brings joy. One reblog can start a chain and push the post onto many people's dashes.

b) Tumblr is not a very functional website, if you want to survive without losing your mind, there are two things you need: xkit rewritten and dashboard unfucker. Play around with the settings until it is to your liking. Additionally, change to firefox if you haven't already and install ublock origin to get rid of ads, tracking etc.

c) If you go to your settings (account! not blog) you can find this under dashboard at the bottom. Turn off at the very least 'best stuff first' since that will fuck up your dash and not give you posts in chronological order.

The rest are a perfonal preference but it will keep your dash tidy and easy to control if you turn them off, too.

d) Apropos settings—get a profile picture, a header, write something human in your bio, anything. Otherwise people will assume you are a bot and block you on sight.

e) Blocking! Do it generously and whenever you want, this is how you keep whatever remains of your sanity. It's not a lethal offense, it is (usually) not even seen as rude or anything along those lines. You block people and they block you and everyone is happy.

f) Under account settings you will find this:

Just like with blocking, use both options to your heart's content.

g) Tumblr is not like other social media platforms, spam liking & reblogging and going three years deep into someone's account is NORMAL and encouraged. You can search a blog by post type, tags, or even go to the archive and scroll through the posts there.

h) Lastly—interaction. We already went over reblogging (I mean it, REBLOG), but there are also replies and asks. If you add something to someone else's post please behave like a kind human being and don't be an asshole; based on my experience, that's easier said than done. On top of that, the tags are ALSO used for communication, go unhinged, ramble, leave your thoughts, or simply use them for organisational purposes. Everyone loves a good insane tag wall.

An open inbox (either anonymously or with your blog attached) is to be used! Please send people asks if they have them active, use it like DMs or a comment section, use it to recommend something, ask questions, participate in an ask or prompt game—we love asks here.

(We do not like harassment in our inboxes, same rules as above.)

#alex yells at the void #tumblr culture #fandom culture #tumblr in a nutshell #how tf do I tag this. anyway #i know a lot of new people followed me after good omens 2 and still are #so this is for y'all!

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voidpumpkin · 2 years

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A Guide For New Users Fleeing From Twitter, From A User Who Needed One When They First Started:

Hi to everyone fleeing from twitter, Elon Musk is shit and he already has had an actively harmful effect on the site, one that will only get worse. So, welcome to Tumblr, it can be kind of intimidating, given its reputation and how many different features there are, I was certainly confused and intimidated when I first logged on and as I'm active on both I sympathise with y’all, so here’s a guide to anyone new:

Put your hashtags in the hashtag section. This is the only way they’ll actually have any sort of effect, or appear when you search for something. Don’t post them on the post itself.

There is a character limit for hashtags and a quite high hashtag limit. Go wild. Writing entire speeches is common.

Don’t tag lots of unrelated stuff to your posts, that’ll get you reported for Spam and just hated in general

Don’t censor words, users are fine with swearing, doing so especially with triggering content makes it hard for people to limit their exposure to said triggering content.

There’s no such thing as ratioing.

We don’t have quote retweeting, every reblog, comment, etc counts to op’s post. They can see it all, and will be notified depending on their notification settings.

Change your icon, people will think you’re a bot if you use the default.

Give yourself a bio, it’ll make you look like a person.

Follow people and tags, that’s the only way you’re gonna see the content you wanna see. The foryoupage isn’t to be trusted.

Actually reblog stuff, liking has no effect, reblogging is the only important thing here as there is no like based algorithm. Doing so will also make you appear human.

You can hide your likes and who you’re following. Doing so is not frowned upon in the slightest.

You can block tags, similarly to muting words on twitter.

You can have multiple blogs tied to one account.

You can customise your blog, go wild.

There is no word limit, you can write as you want. But if it gets too long make use of the keep reading feature, (the three dots beside the add gif feature)

There is an image limit of thirty, up from the former ten, though for some they may be stuck at only using ten, tumblr is kinda inconsistent. If you want to add more you’ll have to reblog your own post.

There is no reblogging limit when it comes to a post, though there is a daily posting limit, go wild, only your followers will be upset.

You can have videos, gifs and pictures in the same post.

You can just post audio.

Adult content is still banned, but actual moderation and enforcement is spotty, especially if it’s written.

Spam liking and reblogging isn’t a thing. Go wild.

You have an ask box that people can submit stuff to. You can respond or just delete the post. You can remove anon capability from it (which will get rid of most of the hate), or outright bar it.

You can’t private your account but you can restrict commenting and reblogging. Edit: I’ve been informed that you can in fact make your blog password protected, it’s just that it’s a rarely done thing and not widely known.

Block whoever and whenever, it’s not a big deal. Though if someone you’ve blocked has reblogged and added to a post and someone you follow reblogs that, their commentary will still be included in the post you see.

We don’t have muting, only blocking.

Yes, direct messaging is a thing (it’s the little smiley face)

The only way to promote your is through ‘tumblr blaze’, you pay a certain amount of money and your post will be promoted, but not targeted, so no invasions of privacy. You are subject to the employee’s whims on whether or not it gets promoted and unfortunately hate speech has been allowed.

Tumblr has tendency to hide/consume comments, posts and asks, don’t be surprised if they go missing.

Tumblr searching a blog relies on tags, words in the post and the users name, keep that in mind.

Posts will remain after you delete your account or the original post if they have been reblogged.

Years old posts are still circulating and that is considered normal.

You can queue up posts to be released when you’re not using your account. Or you can just post whenever you’re active. Go wild.

Wizards exist and are very popular on this site. Accept it.

There are posts with no notes that will never gain any more than a sing note for your like. Accept it.

There are posts will no op. Accept it.

Trans and autistic people dominate this site.

Don’t get pissy when someone tags a post ‘tw (insert slur)’, or any trigger warning for that matter, most are just being considerate of their followers who may be triggered by such content.

Twitter discourse is regularly mocked, it’s not gonna fly here.

No, we don’t call each other oomfs, or anything like that. We just have mutuals.

Tumblr in general lacks a lot colloquialisms that began on twitter.

We do have ‘blorbo’ ‘poor little meow meow’ etc.

Trying to go viral or trying to corporate is frowned upon.

Tumblr has a tendency to blacklist things tagged like ‘crowdfunding’ so bring that kind of logic you use for twitter posts over to tumblr.

We don’t have twitter circles, co-posting, etc.

Tumblr is surprisingly good at recommending blogs.

There are no verified accounts, and your follower count isn't visible. This is a good thing, trying to change it will get you laughed at.

People are going to just make up stuff, don’t believe everything you see and if it’s a claim about someone, investigate it rather than just believe it.

You can edit your posts after you’ve posted them, but the versions reblogged before said changes will still circulate. This editing of the original has been used as a spruce of comedy

If your worried about people seeing your potentially triggering, or even graphic content and they haven’t blocked the tags you’ve used you can use the keeping reading feature to put the content under the cut and post a warning at the top.

And this is quite important:

Stay anonymous and have fun. There isn’t an expectation to constantly expose inner details of your life, you aren’t expected to use your real face, your real name, age, etc. You’re not even expected to be truthful here. Exist however you wanna exist and have fun, that should be the point of social media.

Also keep in mind that tumblr has its own distinct culture that is going to take some getting used to. As well as a history any user who’s been here a while will at least somewhat understand.

Also I'll be editing the post with additional info and corrections provided to me.

#twitter #tumblr #social media #Elon musk #giude #psa #hellsite #edited to correct some stuff #hellsite tag #edited again to add stuff and correct some information

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dansformations · 10 days

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"This ass Is your for farting"

This Is my fault. I tought my boyfriend was too femenine, too flamboyant...

I liked him, he was handsome, smart, lovely ... and With the Best ass around, but just not really into girly guys, he kinda embarrasses me when im with my mates... So i push him to convice him to join to the soccer team, maybe he could learn one or two Things about being masculine around those studs of the team.

After lots of trying, telling him i had a 'phantasy with soccer players' he said yes, he pick the team in base of the uniform tho.., the one who 'make him look Better', obviously the pink.

At start he wasnt enjoying It, but with the Time i saw him getting More excited about It, Until the day he came to our place excited about his first game, that day also notice something diferent... A slightly stench, i tought he just forgot to put some deodorant that day, but that stench just got stronger and stronger With time..., and he looked ok With it, a little too much i would say:

PRRRRPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT he lifted a leg and farted while we were at the couch together watching a movie - huh huh! Protein fart!

-Sweetheart, wtf!? - i said covering my nose

- Just some Man scent, "sweetheart" - i felt some anoy in His voice, and More in that last part - and this thing Is getting to boring, Let me find something Better - he quit or drama queer movie and changed It into the sport channel - there you go! Thats Better

"Well, at least hes not Girly anymore..." I said to myself. That couldnt console me for everything that was about to happen tho.

His stench was More and More strong, sometimes he wasnt getting showers or bath at all, and the one time i convince him to take a bath together saying we needed it something romantic (but being honest just needed him to get rid of the smell) he just...

-Hey, Babe, want me to turn this into a jacuzzi? - then he farted for like half of minute, flooding everything with its bubbles of stink

And as if that were not enough, he wasnt bottoming at all.

- "This ass Is your for farting, Bro"

With the Time i get he got sick of me trying to school him to being the educated cute bot he used to be, so he started saying i should join His team.

- "Maybe we can show you one thing or two of how to be a real Man"

It was devastated. Now i was the Girly one of the relationship, It seems.

And im tired, of the new him, of the new me, of the new us... So im doing something about It.

I walk to the training camp, ready for my first day in the team. Maybe he has reason. And he acept when I tried to change him, so... Maybe Is my turn.

I see my stud boyfriend pushing one of His buttcheeks while Lets out a really long fartp

PPPPRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTRRRFTFFFT

Liberates With a dumb face expresion while His mates laugh loudly like a Group of childs.

I sigh and take a sip of my protein shake, I don't want to embarrass him in front of his mates.

#dumber #gay #male tf story #gay to straight #fart #fart kink #bottom to top

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in1-nutshell · 4 months

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So, I saw that thing you did in RID where buddy is basically Perrito from The Last Wish and I love it!

Not RID related, but is it ok if I request TFP cons with a buddy who is like Death from The Last Wish? Same personality, probably uses that creepy whistle of his, loves to instill fear in the Autobots. Thanks! Love your work!

Hi! Thank you for the compliment! We are back with the Puss in Boots characters again! If this is not what you wanted, please let me know.

Hope you enjoy!

Bot Buddy who has the personality of Death from "Puss in Boots The Last Wish" with Megatron, Predaking, and Starscream

SFW, Cybertronian reader

TFP

Megatron

Megatron feels a bit embarrassed about this… he doesn’t remember recruiting this solider.

Truly doesn’t remember recruiting them. It’s almost as if they just appeared one day and just stuck around since.

Megatron can not deny the absolute powerhouse they are on the battlefield. A part of him shudders when he sees the damage his soldier does.

He makes sure that Soundwave always has tabs on them.

But there is no denying the fact that they get the work done. Maybe a little too efficient. Megatron masks this uneasiness the best he can, but he thinks that they might be onto him.

Over the course of the war, he has never felt so uneasy about someone than when he is with them.

Chills are sent down his spinal struts when he hears their signature whistle.

Megatron pity’s the poor bots that have to meet the end of their duel scythes while looking into their cruel red optics.

“My Leige.”--Buddy

“Soldier.”--Megatron

“When will my next assignment be ready? I have some unfinished business with the Autobots, specifically the yellow one.”--Buddy

“The yellow one?”--Megatron

“Yes, perhaps no whistle for him the next time we meet.”—Buddy

Megatron is thinking whether to give the Autobots a warning that his nutjob of soldier is onto them.

Starscream

Buddy is one of the reasons he wants to be leader of the Decepticon’s.

Either get rid of them or brainwash them to be loyal to him only.

He can’t remember when they joined the Decepticon army. They just appeared behind him one day and stuck to the shadows from then on.

Starscream can’t stand being near them.

He wants to run in the opposite direction every time he hears that whistle.

The only reason why he hasn’t tried to kill the soldier is because he firmly believes that Buddy is a supernatural being.

Not that he would ever admit it out loud.

Buddy whistling because they want to.

Starscream shrieking.

Predaking

He finds the soldier very peculiar and a strange fellow.

Predaking hasn’t had much interaction with the soldier.

Some passing through the halls and quick exchange in words, nothing more.

But every time they cross paths Predaking feels a sudden wave of coolness wash over him. Not a pleasant one, a cold unforgiving one.

They are more of a cryptid on the ship. He has heard more stories about this Con through the Vechicons gossip.

But he has heard the whistle around the ship from time to time.

He may be the strongest Con on board, but he knows that there is a higher presence on board, and he is not going to mess with it.

Buddy whistling while walking through the halls thinking about the bird they saw today.

Predaking a couple doors down.

“…Nope.”

Turns the other way and leaves the ship.

#transformers #transformers x reader #maccadam #tfp #tfp x reader #tfp megatron #tfp starscream #tfp predaking #bot buddy

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mattykay · 3 months

Text

Please? - Rodrick Heffley x Ftm Reader

This is heavily based of my cai bot I made. Hope you like it.

Features: sub!reader, dom!Rodrick, light spanking, degrading + praise, p in v, use of 'boypussy' used, stoner (implied) reader, weed, and very very horny Rodrick.

All Rodrick wanted was to keep his van. But due to his lack of focus and dyslexia, it was hard to have good enough grades to keep it.

Frank and Susan suggest Rodrick find a tutor, or find another way.

He tried cheating, getting answers from his friends, paying other kids to do his tests, none of it worked.

So when he begrugingly asked you an honors english student for tutoring, it was a bit out of left field. But because of the decent amount of money he offered you couldn't find it in you to turn it down.

So you began tutoring him at his house, Tuesdays and Thursdays, 3:45 to 5:00. Dear god did he hate it.

He never disliked you, but your carefree attitude irked him to no end. Sure, Rodrick was lazy and liked that you weren't a hard ass about anything, but the fact that everything came to you easily pissed him off.

He looked over to you from where he laid, sprawled out on the old wood floors of his messy bedroom. His brows then furrowed as he looked at one of the words on your computer screen, the letters jumbling as he tried to focus.

"What does that word say?" He asked with a huff. You turned to the screen. "Basically." You said, making sure not to treat him like he was stupid. Rodrick cocked a brow, his lips forming a light annoyed frown. "Basically what?" He asked, twirling the beaten yellow pencil in his fingers. You chuckled at his agitation. "The word is basically, Rodrick." This made him scoff, but as his eyes fell on your lazy smile he felt himself smile too.

Rodrick was like every horny teenager, "Can we take a break?" He asked smugly. After getting a nod from you he tilted his head. "Let me hit your cart?" The dark haired boy asked. "Absolutely not." You shot back nearly instantly. Rodrick pouted, "Cmon.. please?" He asked, trying his best puppy dog eyes.

You shook your head, taking a light hit from your cart. You smirked as you watched his nose scrunch with want. He inhaled the light sent of weed and whatever flavoring your cartridge had inside. His eyes lit up. You could see the gears turn in his head. He wanted weed, and he wanted you. He knew how to get both.

So the next hit you took, before you could exhale his lips were on yours. You felt his tongue make its way in your lips to battle with yours. Your hands tangled in his shaggy hair nearly instantly and his fingertips dug into your hips.

Before you knew what was happening you felt Rodricks lean arms push you to your feet. He barely broke the heated kiss to do so. Rodrick laid you out on his bed, feeling his plush mattress move beneath the two of you. His lips began to suck and bite at your neck, relishing in the pathetic noises that left your lips.

Rodrick began to unbutton your pants without even thinking to ask. You felt your core ache shamefully.

When he got your pants and boxers off, leaving you in your shirt he gazed down at your dripping pussy. A shit-eating grin came across his face.

"Been wanting this, huh?" He cooed, one hand gripping your thigh. You could feel every bump and callous on his hand. His other hand stroked lightly up and down your dripping heat. "Dirty little slut." He said harshly despite his smile. "You're lucky I've been dying to taste some boypussy." Rodrick purred, licking your slick from his fingers.

You ached, bucking your hips up at him. "Rodrick, please." You begged so pathetically. Rodrick was the last person you'd ever imagine wanting. Not to mention begging for.

He chuckled in a way that made you clench your pussys walls. "Only because you're begging like a good boy." He said, rubbing circles on your clit. He rid himself of his shirt and pants, slipping his cock out of his boxers. You felt like drooling.

Even more so when he pushed himself inside you, not even bothering to tell you or be nice about it. He gave you a few thrusts like that before flipping you over, fucking you deeply from the back. "Fuck- You fucking slut.." He hissed and he buried himself deep inside you. "Couldn't even bother to ask to suck my cock? You're pathetic." Rodrick spat through his labored breath, reaching forward to grab your hair, spanking you quickly with his free hand.

His face lit up as he felt you clench around his length when his hand met the meat of your ass. "Yeah? You fuckin' like that?" He laughed as he spanked again. You whimpered, feeling your orgasm build as his hand moved from your ass to your clit. His nimble fingers toyed with the sensitive bud. "Rodrick-! I-I'm-"

"Shut up. Shut the fuck up and take it." He said, burying himself deeper inside you than you thought anyone ever could. "Take my cock like a good boy. Cum f'me baby." He said, speaking a little sweeter now.

It drove you to the edge. You felt your walls clench around him. "Yeah.. Yeah- Such a good boy.." He groaned into your ear as you felt his hot seed cover your walls.

Rodrick pulled out, laying down next to you. He gently wiped excess cum from your thighs. "I think I like our sessions a little more now." He said, a surprisingly sweet smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

This was my first fic, I hope you enjoy it.

#ftm reader #ftm ns/fw #ftm sub #rodrick heffley #rodrick x reader #rodrick smut #smut #trans nsft #mlm nsft #mlm

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buckysmith · 2 years

Text

Request from my TikTok account

How the TFP decepticons would react to (human) reader call them love

Includes: TFP Megatron,TFP Starscream, TFP Breakdown, TFP Knockout, TFP Predaking, TFP Shockwave and TFP Soundwave

Megatron:

- Honestly if you’re an human, he would look at you like you just told him humans can fly.

- He would for sure grin like a maniac the moment he understands what it means in human terms or in your terms.

- He wouldn’t show you that he’s proud that you called him love, he’s a prideful warrior and leader after all but if you happen to call him love while someone else is there it would increase his ego even more (if its wouldn’t be high enough already xD)

- He secretly wants to hear you call him love every time (He would soundwave get to record it so he could listing to it while you’re away doing human stuff. It would confuse soundwave so much, but he wouldn’t let anyone know what Megatron does nor ask a question.

- (Oh btw, not even you would know that. It’s a secret between Megatron and soundwave )

Starscream:

Oh dear god, the moment you call him Love it would be over for you.

- He’s a proud mech, for sure but by Primus- the moment you give him this nickname you would have consequences for your own actions.

- It’s not like he would get mad at you, everything but that.

- No, it’s more likely the fact that you have to admire him so much for you to call him love (he’s a poor mech, he deserves some love)

- He would hide you from Megatron.I mean he would do that even before but after you call him love he would do anything to make sure you’re at least fifty miles away from megatron. He doesn't want you to get hurt, and he knows where Megatron goes, death and pain follows.

Knockout:

- Oh dear heaven, don’t feed this man more ego it’s already enough.

- He would probably just look at you, pick you up like a teddy bear and hold you in front of his faceplate, wanting you to repeat what you just said.

- The moment you would repeat, this bastard would grin at you like a maniac

- Ofc you love him, who wouldn’t? Yes, yes he would take it as you would love him, not as a cute nickname.

- He would pinch your cheek, telling you what a cute little human you are

- Would tell everyone that you call him love and that you love him, I mean obviously you have to love him.

Breakdown:

-His first reaction would be like “what did you say? Did you call me love?”

- He would definitely pick you up just to make 100% sure that he understands you

- He would be like soundwave and admire your cute little nickname.

- He would give you a nickname too cause of that, not like love or other human nicknames but more likely something cybertronian.

- He would make sure to show you how thankful he is, for him it’s important to show you the same respect. (Yes, for him it’s your respect to him to call him Love )

Predaking:

- His emotions tend to change but the moment you call him love he would smile at you, even if he was angry only moments before.

- He would ask you why you call him love since he’s a big intimidating mech.

- He would pick you up to bring you somewhere safe, somewhere he can cuddle with you and show you how much he appreciates his adorable little nickname you gave him.

- He would honor his nickname, but Primus he would get jealous easily so don’t call anything or anyone else like Love or smt like that.

- We don’t want roasted humans or other cons, don’t we? I mean it’s not even thanksgiving yet.

Shockwave:

- He would just stare at you, no emotion, not a single word, nothing.

- You would have to explain to him why exactly you called him “love” cause he isn’t lovely, he’s a creepy scientist mech with a strong will and logical explanations . Not a sweet little mini bot (at least this is his opinion)

- After a while he would come attached to your sweet little nickname for him and don’t you dare to call somebody or something anything near like Love or lovely or he would for sure get rid of it. (Without your knowledge ofc).

- He would questioning himself a lot cause how could he get attached to something like that, for him it’s not logical.

Soundwave:

- Same like Shockwave, he would just stare at you not capable of anything but repeating in his processor what you just said to him.

- Honestly he would be confused, do you mean by that that he’s lovely? Or do you love him and if yes, in which way?

- You would have to explain to him too what exactly you mean.

- Not like the other two mechs he would show you that he’s proud that you call him love.

- But don’t say that in front of other mechs, it’s not that he doesn’t like it or want you to hide it, but it’s safer for you cause you’re still a human being. I mean he’s a busy man and even though Laserbeak is always with you or at least near you he’s paranoid of like anything.

My request are open :)

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