#but the capability for some change is there
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to hold you, to heal you | n.s.
Summary: Noah is exhausted. It feels as if he's failing at everything, including at being the boyfriend his girl deserves. She's there to reassure him that that couldn't be further from the truth.
Tags & trigger warnings: angst, implied poor mental health (self-doubt, anxiety, depression), mentions of sex, fluff, comfort, just pretend live 2024.
words: 1.9k | my works
to hold you, to heal you — noah sebastian x fem. reader
The house was shrouded in quietness, the calming fragance of incense lit half an hour ago still lingering in the air.
Noah had gone to bed an hour earlier; he was exhausted.
Silently, she made her way to the bedroom, careful not to disturb him.
He lay on his side of the bed as she entered, back turned to her, the covers barely draped over his bare torso.
The temperatures had risen in the past two weeks, making the house uncomfortably warm. They should've swapped the covers for summer sheets, but neither could muster the energy to change them just yet.
She tiptoed to her side of the bed and slipped under the covers, nestling herself right behind Noah, wrapping an arm around his stomach and pressing her chest to his back, her cheek resting against his shoulder.
It was often that they found each other like this: her spooning him. They loved to intertwine their legs beneath the sheets, and he loved to drag her hand to his chest, right where his heart beat. He wanted her to feel it, to feel how his heart’s rhythm transformed from a relentless dance to a gentle pulse at her touch.
She nuzzled the tip of her nose against the nape of his neck, delighting in the feel of his soft locks, growing longer by the day. His hand found hers and guided it to the spot where his heart resided. She focused on his heartbeat for a while, on his breathing. She let the warmth of his body transfer to hers, despite the heat already filling the room.
Cooconing him like that felt like a promise that would eventually break. When he was in her arms, she felt as though she could shield him from anything, everything. She could just keep him caged, safe and sound tucked against her body, much smaller than his yet capable of safeguarding him. She so desperately wanted to keep that promise…
Yet, she was aware that those we love eventually slip, one way or another, no matter how much we try to ease their fall.
Nobody is extempt from hurting.
And now Noah was hurting. Her promise hadn’t lasted.
She tightened her grip unconsciously when a wave of anger and sadness washed over her, her muscles pressing against Noah’s, her heart wanting —needing— to break through the skin and find Noah’s, merge with his, beat as one.
Love is always a constant battle of trying, trying, failing, trying, trying again, and sometimes, making it right.
Tonight, she would make it right. She would heal him one way or another; take some of his pain and store it in her own chest, in her veins, in her bones.
Blinking away the tears, she pulled back slightly, just enough to see his back. It was dark, but the moonlight filtering through the curtains revealed the faint lines of his tattoos. Unable to stop herself, she traced the designs with a gentle finger, following every curve and sharp edge.
Noah shivered beneath her touch, his muscles tensing.
In less than a minute, he turned onto his back, his hands seeking her. He grasped her and positioned her astride his lap, his hands resting on her hips while hers landed on his chest. He wore nothing but black boxers, and she was clad in his t-shirt and cotton panties.
Under the moonlight, she found his October eyes.
“Hi,” she said softly.
“Hi,” Noah replied.
“Did I wake you?”
“No,” he answered, their voices mere whispers in the night. “Couldn’t sleep,” he explained, a hint of resignation in his voice.
It was soft now, not the rough, visceral one he used on stage for some of Bad Omens’s songs. This was the voice she loved the most, the deep raw timbre that was yet so delicate, both tender and masculine, holding harmony within a quiet power. Every time she heard her name uttered with that voice, that tone so soft yet demanding, she melted in his hands.
“The voices?” she guessed.
Noah nodded, letting out a heavy sight that he’d tried to contain, his gaze falling. She hated seeing him so conflicted, but there was only so much she could do. She didn’t know what else to do beside be by his side, engulfed in the dark of the after hours and surrounded by white noise.
With nothing more than a hmm, she brushed some hairs away from his face, and spent the next few minutes tracing her thumb along his forehead and then down his left eyebrow, trying to push some of his worries away. His eyes closed momentarily, and his own fingers began to move in a soothing rhythm where they touched the skin of her thighs. The weight of her on top of him always felt delightful, a comforting pressure.
But the sensation lasted only a few seconds. He grasped her wrist, holding her hand away from him.
“You deserve someone better than me.”
His words caught her off ward, making her frown and shift back a little, trying to discern his expression in the dark.
But he looked resolute, no ounce of doubt on his face as the words seemed to fill the space they were in, threatening to suffocate them.
“Noah—”
“You should be with someone that doesn’t spend most of the time away,” he began, “someone who isn’t locked in the studio whenever he’s home. Someone who doesn’t take time off to get his mind straight instead of choosing time off to be with his girl.”
She was tempted to snort. He was being silly. Yet, she knew it wasn’t the time to take his confessions lightly. He was suffering, and her job was to ease that pain, even if it meant going through the same conversation they’d had many times before.
“Is that what the voices told you?” she inquired softly.
She was met with silence, the room charging up with his unspoken words.
“Noah,” she said, her tone determined as she tried to capture his full attention. She freed herself from his grasp and leaned forward, resting her forearms on his chest and reaching the sides of his face with her hands. He hadn’t shaved in the last three days and a little stubble was growing. “I love watching you work,” she said. “It’s what makes you happy, and I’d never do anything to keep your happiness away. Same goes for your health. You need this. There’s no arguing about it.”
He didn’t seem convinced by her words, his hands falling to the sides of her body, resting apathetically on the mattress. He felt defeated.
“Noah, baby,” she insisted, calling his name softly and touching his chin with two fingers. Look at me. Listen to me. “You’re driven by passion, and that same passion is the one that led you to me, so please, don’t say that I don’t deserve you. I deserve no one but you.”
She waited for her words to sink in. There was a little crease between his eyebrows now. He was still doubtful, torturing himself needlessly.
“I want you happy and healthy, and taking time off isn’t something you should feel guilty for. I’m proud of you for it. And I’ll be happy if you decide to stay locked up in the house for a month. I’ll stay here with you because a healthy Noah is my favorite Noah.”
Under other circumstance, he would have made a joke about that, probably a dirty one about her favorite Noah. But that night, the truth was that he didn’t feel like laughing. As much as he loved her smile and her little laughs, there was a demon on his shoulder reminding him of all his failures and all his weaknessses.
She was so sweet to him, though. Always making an effort to knock off that demon and step on the devilish creature, turn it to dust with her fierceless light.
His hand instinctively rose to her cheek, his thumb moving in a slow, almost reverent motion that stirred her heart. She leaned into his touch, her own hands cradling his face and keeping him safe, enveloped in her embrace.
She missed him. She had missed him terribly over the last few months. The entire year, in fact. But she was stronger than her own demons. She watched from afar as her boy made his way up, as his band grew, as their artistry gained recognition beyond the walls of their homemade studio with each passing day. She watched Noah’s tireless dedication to reaching out to the world with his music, his stories, the worlds capable of creating on his own. She watched as he poured his heart and soul into it, and how time began to consume him, both day and night.
Until he could bear it no longer.
She touched her lips to his. She kissed him for a brief moment. Soft and slow, emphasizing her presence, her connection to his very soul. And he responded delightfully, breaking the contact just for a few seconds, keeping the kiss a ghost, his lips hovering over hers beyond touch.
Inhaling his fresh breath, she wanted him to kiss her again. She wanted to let herself drown in the kiss.
When he did kiss her, it was the most achingly slow kiss he had ever given her. It was a kiss that said, “I’m tired. I need slow. I need time to stop. Please, hold me.”
And she would hold him. Any time. Always.
As her body relaxed on top of his, he cupped her entire face in his hands, keeping their mouths locked together. She tasted divine, and he cursed every second he had to pause to take a breath before diving back in with a little sigh.
When she shifted on top of him and he felt her core hovering right where he should’ve had an erection, he felt instead another failing.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured, withdrawing from her, his hands slipping away, turning his head so that his cheek pressed to the pillow. He exhaled with defeat.
“Sorry for what?” she asked, disconcerted.
“I’m not… I’m not in the mood for sex right now. I’m sorry.”
“Why do you have to be sorry for that?” she questioned, her confusion deepening. “I’m not here to demand that from you,” she added. Far from it. It pained her that he thought she needed that every time he kissed her. It pained her to see him punishing himself again for simply not feeling up to it, as if there was something wrong with it. “In fact, I just hoped I could just hold you all night.”
Noah looked back at her, somewhat taken aback. Not the reply he had expected.
He was definitely not his usual self.
“Would you let me?” she pleaded, blinking.
It took him a moment, but finally he relented, placing a hand behind her head to pull her down so that she rested against his chest. With each steady rise and fall, she smiled through watery eyes, hoping that tonight she could keep her promise: to hold him, to heal him, if only until the sun rose again.
She had just closed her eyes when his voice filled her ears again, soft, delicate, vulnerable.
“I’m so afraid, that the walls that I have made have locked me in. I’m not okay. But I can try my best to just pretend…”
He was singing to her.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health & well-being, you are not alone and there is always someone willing to listen and help. Reach out and keep fighting. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel.
#noah sebastian#bad omens#noah sebastian one shot#noah sebastian x you#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian fluff#bad omens cult#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian fanfiction
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If it's not a spoiler, what would you say is WD!Rose's biggest weakness/flaw?
I would hope that her biggest flaws haven't really changed from the original show. It's not like she acquired some new ones just because Steven's there. At her core, her motivations and fears are still the same.
Largely, it's her self-hatred and self-doubt.
Rose Quartz has always been defined by her dislike of herself. It's in the lyrics of the end song. It's practically telegraphed at every episode she shows up in.
Rose Quartz popped out of the ground, was immediately defined by who she was (supposed to be) and then was pretty much immediately reprimanded by the other diamonds for acting out in any way that didn't fit their 'standards'.
Then she went to Earth, realized their standards were shite, and tried desperately to become someone else - while never believing that she could ACTUALLY change and grow to be someone new. To the very end, she thought that she was fooling the others, even as she tried to protect them.
Her entire arc is about desperately trying to be herself, and failing at every step of the way because she fundamentally doesn't believe she's capable of change. She looks in the mirror and she sees in past tense.
Rose, here, is faced with something she has been running after her whole life:
Living proof of how a Diamond could be Not A Diamond in a way that isn't deceiving anyone. In a way that is purely, entirely, fundamentally, changing who they are.
Rose adores Steven at this point in the story, as much as she is terrified of him and all he represents.
His ability to forget who he is supposed to be.
His potential for change, and growth beyond his programming.
And the looming threat of that all being just another lie, or a temporary fix that will shatter her hopes of ever becoming like him.
Of course... she doesn't know about his dreams, nor his internal struggles. But that's gonna be its own story. :)
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I think it's super important to call out racist tropes in fanon, but I also think it's important to help provide a bit of education so other creators know how to avoid these tropes and what to do instead.
With that in mind, one of the most common things that us fans of color have been pointing out in the OFMD fandom is racist depiction of Ed's hair, so here's an intro to avoiding some of these harmful tropes and what you can do instead.
Why does Ed's hair matter so much?
For people of color like Ed, our hair isn't just hair. Our hair is also about our culture and self-expression, and taking care of our hair is a skill distinct from caring for White hair. Our hair is an expression of personal and communal identity.
Controlling and stigmatizing hairstyles is an important way that people of color have been and continue to be oppressed. Across the history of European colonization, you'll find countless stories of cruelties such as forced haircuts, and this legacy lives on today when kids of color are told they have to change their natural and cultural hairstyles to meet school dress codes. Depiction of hair matters so much because of this history.
What are some things to avoid?
Common racist depictions of Ed's hair that you will want to avoid include:
Depicting Ed's hair as dirty and unclean when he's always shown to have very neat, well-taken-care-of hair in the show
Implying that he does not know how to care for his hair
Implying that he needs a White man to help him take care of his hair (White guys are not going to know how to care for Ed's hair texture!)
Depicting him using items that aren't meant for haircare on his hair (like forks, broken tools, etc.). Ed surely knows what a hairbrush is and how to use one.
Implying that Ed does not have a hair care routine or care much about his personal hygeine. You do not get to have that much beautiful, well-groomed hair without caring about maintaining it.
Implications that Ed is unusually rough/thoughtless about his hair, such as cutting off tangled sections or leaving knots to get worse
Avoid language that implies Ed's hair is unusually unruly and unkempt, such as describing it as "matted." Personally, I even bristle hearing it described as a "mane" or "wild" because it's always very neatly-groomed.
What are some ways to talk about Ed's hair that are okay?
I recommend writers and artists considering a project involving Ed's hair do some research on their own - browsing natural hair care subreddits is a pretty easy way to learn quickly what goes into caring for our hair and some of the common everyday struggles we might have.
You don't need to depict Ed's hair as perfect all the time! On lazy days where he doesn't style his hair, he might have frizz going on, and he might be frustrated by the effort and time it takes to maintain his hair while they're on the ocean and the salt air is constantly wreaking havoc.
It's also okay to write about Stede helping Ed with his hair. Stede will need to learn how to work with Ed's hair, but there's nothing wrong with scenes where Stede helps Ed with putting his hair up into a fancy style or washes it for him just because they both want to spend time together. The issue arises when you have implications that Ed needs that help and isn't capable of caring for his hair on his own.
What are some ideas for scenes involving Ed's hair care and routines?
There are so many wonderful scenes you can write about Ed's hair care routines! They can add dimension to domestic moments and make Ed's life feel more real. Here are some ideas I love.
Stede being excited to find new hair products at the market he knows Ed will love
The men of color on the Revenge having self-care nights to help each other care for their hair and skin
Ed patiently teaching Stede about how to care for his hair and trusting him to help him wash it
Ed having fun after settling down at their inn with experimenting with fun floral scents in his hair products
Ed teaching Stede how to put his hair in an elaborate, fancy style passed down from his mother
Stede carefully writing down Ed's hair care routine, from how he likes to rinse his hair with cool freshwater after a swim in the ocean to how he uses coconut oil to minimize frizz, and Ed being touched by his obvious care
In the show, Ed's hair looks amazing even at his lowest moments, so you could make art of him finding comfort in his hair even in the darkest times
There's so much you can do! I'd love seeing the balance of fics about Ed's hair shift towards mostly loving, thoughtful, non-racist depictions, so let's make that happen!
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i think it would be nice if like there was a one shot about us having a kid with him i think that would be perfect for a one shot
i’m assuming this is about sukuna—if i’m wrong i’m sorry anon, i’ll take my mind out from the depths of the filthy sukuna gutter
FATHERLY DUTIES
Ryomen Sukuna x Fem Reader
Summary: Pregnancy was an experience Sukuna had never expected to be bestowed upon him; you as his wife are bringing his child into the world. It’s a journey filled with joys and challenges, something he hopes to face successfully hand in hand with the woman he trusts most. Who would’ve known that such a pure life could stem from someone so corrupt?
Word count: 2.2k
Contains: Established relationship, pregnancy, brief smut, Sukuna being smitten, brief description of sex, slice of life, alternative universe: Sukuna is human
Note: making this bow divider took longer than me actually writing this, i hope it resembles bows (੭ ˊ^ˋ)੭ — don’t be afraid to request, i’ll get around to them when i have time
DURING THE PREGNANCY
Pregnancy is a wonderful gift; the ability to bring a child into the world with the person you adore should be cherished. However, the experience is far from being as glamorous as you imagined it to be. What seemed to be a breeze for everyone else hit you ten times harder—you’re experiencing it all. Bloating, morning sickness, general nausea, a weak bladder, and the list goes on. You convince yourself it’s all worth it to bring your beacon of joy into the world, but it feels as though you’re barely clinging on.
As a man, he would never understand the extremes you experience daily with this growing life inside of you—though any set of eyes could see it was obvious you were struggling, even his. To lighten your workload, he subtly began taking over house tasks; encouraging you to get your rest was similar to asking a wolf to play fetch—you were not giving him an easy time. Claiming that just because you are pregnant you aren’t capable of taking care of chores anymore is insulting and then whining due to the aches you get after completing them; it’s a constant game of tug of war with no winning side. Since your hormones are all over the place, it is best to allow you to have your way; arguing with you won’t help anyone, and it could cause issues with the development of your child.
Observing your bump growing throughout the duration made him realise this was now his reality; half of him and half of you created this new soul. He never believed he could feel so fondly of someone he had never met, how a soon-to-be human who is currently smaller than the palm of his hand could alter him in ways he wouldn’t imagine he could change. If there is a given opportunity when you allow him to feel your belly, he would take it in an instant; the movement in which your child shifts and manoeuvres is almost as though it recognises his presence—showing favouritism to its father before they are even acquainted. The way in which he massages your hips and presses his lips to your stomach reminds you of all the reasons why you chose to settle down with him of all people. Sukuna may not be the most put-together man but he swears by his vows to raise this child right with you. The mistakes of his past will be discarded, life handed him this new slate filled with a multitude of opportunities—you were the angel sent to guide him on the right path, and you sure looked the part with how elegant you were in your flowy maternity clothes and lazy hairstyles.
Weight fluctuations are inevitable, but the bitter reality of realising some of your favourite clothing pieces don’t fit correctly anymore hits you hard. Your body has to adjust its shape and your child needs the nutrients; it would be vain to only care for your looks rather than the health of your baby. Instead of throwing out your old clothes, Sukuna emptied half of his side of the wardrobe for you to store them there—it’s not guaranteed you return to your original size any time soon, but it wouldn’t hurt to hold onto them for the memories they carried. He finds you to be as attractive as you once were; you look completely identical in his eyes, your clothing size is nothing but a number—the shape and curves of your body make you who you are, his special girl. Sukuna had stopped working out as much as he used to, claiming he was bulking and putting on weight of his own; while it was the truth, the reality was he didn’t want you to go through this change alone. It can be daunting and weigh on your conscience, but it should never affect you—a woman whose beauty can only be experienced. No matter the skill of a painter, they would find it impossible to encapsulate so much splendour on a canvas.
“A nursery wouldn’t be hard to build; we don’t need to pay anyone. I could do that myself.”— He said. While you are resting on the sofa, minding your business flicking through a magazine, the sounds of crashing and cursing sound out from upstairs. It’s hard to restrain a chuckle before you shout up to check in on him, and his tone instantly shifts from gruff to mellow, doing his best to convince you all is well while half the crib he spent hours on just collapsed. You give it to him that he is a handyman—he is just far too impatient to read instruction manuals. Ignorance is not always bliss, especially if the crib his child is supposed to sleep in keeps plummeting to the ground. The walk of shame through the living room to grab his thin framed reading glass was silent; he didn’t dare to look you in the eyes since he could already picture the smug expression on your face. Proving him wrong was like a punch to the gut; it flattened his almighty ego to the floor, burying it amongst the dirt. There is a strange guilt summoned when you acknowledge his inaudible struggles, so the two of you join forces. You knelt on the rug of the nursery, reading the instructions out loud while he did the handy work. It’s a job well done when the room you envisioned comes to life, all the blissful colours to stimulate the imagination and the variety of stuffed animals patiently waiting to greet their new friend—it’s everything you could’ve hoped for, you pray your child will love it there as much as you do.
Many pregnant women state their sex life runs dry, but yours has taken the turn for the opposite. Whether it be your pheromones growing stronger due to the hormones or him appreciating the strength it takes to become a mother, he could not take his hands off of you. Sex was something he initially hesitated on during your first trimester; he feared that too much activity might render you eligible for a miscarriage since it was so early on. When you began becoming more stable and combating the pregnancy symptoms with ease, that’s when the two of you slipped back to your usual bedroom routine. You were limited to few positions, but seeing you in missionary was something he could never catch himself complaining about. Not only was your belly growing, your breasts were too—you had simply gotten him awestruck by doing nothing but existing. What a woman’s body is capable of is truly spectacular; who wouldn’t be captivated by the beauty of it? His thrusts were much gentler than usual; it felt as though you were having intercourse with a different person due to how careful he was being. It become more sensual, the bond between the two of you stronger than it had ever been. His eyes were filled with warmth as he gazed down at you, smiling softly while the back of his hand brushed against your cheek. No one had ever belonged to him before, nor had he belonged to anyone; it was a beautiful transition into this freshly blossoming future. He finally has discovered his sense of belonging is with you by his side. His idea to snap a picture of your belly during the weeks of growth led to half of a photo album filled with images of you, there for you to reminisce on after you enter labour.
AFTER THE PREGNANCY
Delivering a child was the most chaotic yet eye-opening experience for both of you—more so him who watched it from a fully different perspective, seeing everything up close. He never felt ill, nor was he disgusted; it was amazing how you carried around this bundle of life like it was nothing. While you were dosed on the epidural, he came out of the delivery room with gashes on his hands from the force your nails dug into him. There was no gender reveal since it was decided you wanted it to be a surprise, placing your separate bets on what the baby could be. Even though he wanted a boy, as soon as he saw his baby girl resting in your arms, he fell in love with her. Though she had a sparse head of hair, it was a similar colour to his. In his arms, she barely existed—nothing but a mere dot with her little white hat on. It was rewarding to see how far he come since you first met him; you couldn’t be more proud of him. You didn’t intend to change him, but he altered himself in ways he thought were necessary. He kept his witty humour and arrogance, the two things that truly make him who he is. It wouldn’t be your Sukuna if he wasn’t a handsome pain in the ass, finding ways to tease you yet also ways to comfort you and make you laugh in desperate times.
When you had taken the childcare classes for new parents before going into labour, he outdid himself in all preparations; he was like the student who thoroughly studied for the exam months before it even arrived. The reason he had been trying so hard is due to his fear of hurting the baby—he finds himself being rough without realising, often making the same mistakes while handling you. During nights, she would screech down the baby monitor right beside his ear, causing you both to stir. The duty of checking in on her was split on a makeshift roster, but you had been growing exhausted progressively with each passing day. Since there are days when he is up later than you, he sees to her to prevent the sudden outbursts happening during the early hours of the morning. She would weep and fuss until he took her into his arms. When she’d go silent, he would lean to lay her back down until she started up her cries again. The only thing that would calm her down was being held by her father.
Time flies by with the new addition to the household; your daughter is now able to grasp onto her favourite teddy bears at five months old. Her wardrobe is bigger than yours, and she managed to successfully steal the heart of your husband—the only competitor. All three of you would spend half of the day playing, chatting with her in the room since it would aid her mental skills. She seemed pleased seeing both of her parents, watching the two of you chatter and share innocent displays of affection. Her cooing noises would make you both grin; Sukuna couldn’t believe one of his creations could be so pure and full of love. Others told him he was nothing but distant and incapable of kindling sincere connections, but he managed to prove those who held a lack of faith in him wrong. He will admit that there were times he found the idea of love far too corny for a man like him, but accepting it into his life made it so much brighter, giving it a completely new meaning.
There came many troubles and stressful situations, but the excitement of raising a child made them all irrelevant to Sukuna. The two of you finally made time for an at-home date, sharing two light drinks and a meal. Men who fall out of love with their wives after they become mothers are nothing but weak in his eyes—if they cannot deal with one minor change, they would never amount to anything in life that involves them stepping free from their cowardly safety net. If anything, this journey made him realise how he truly wishes you would be the person who will die by his side; part of him hopes the two of you find a way to bypass death and live on together for eternity—it wouldn’t hurt to be optimistic. In the bedroom, he stripped himself free of his clothes, his gigantic figure looming over you while he stared down at you. He climbed on top of you, pinning your hands to your sides while he stole a kiss—yearning for your affection greater than ever before. That sparkle in your eyes never left; he remembers seeing it ignite for the first time when he first kissed you all those years ago.
“You are quite the woman, you know?” Sukuna hums, rubbing his nose against yours while his hair brushes across your forehead.
“I know, don’t you just love me so much?” You tease, poking your tongue out as you grin.
“I do, more than anything. You’ll always be my number one girl; our little angel comes in close second.”
“I used to be your angel” Your voice winds in a whiny tone, widening your eyes and curving your lips down to appear upset.
“You still are,” He kisses your cheek while his hand trails down to the waistband of your panties, twanging it against your skin as he speaks, “I miss your bump.”
“Do you want another baby?” You beam at him, your eyes crinkling and your hand squeezing his.
“If you want one, I wouldn’t be opposed.”
#jjk sukuna#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#jjk smut#jjk#oneshot#ryomen sukuna#alternate universe#smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen sukuna
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「bleachers and interruptions」 Art Donaldson x F!reader
You can find the other parts here!
━━━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━━━
"For how long are you planning to stare at her, Donaldson?" Tashi approaches Art while he is busy looking at you in the stands, a book in your hand as you wait "for Tashi" to finish her training.
"w-what?" he detaches his eyes from you and your friend wants to laugh at the deer-caught-in-headlights look on his face, a clean tennis shirt in his hands waiting to be worn.
Tashi stands in front of him, the smirk on her face growing wider by the second, her hands on her hips "Donaldson, I can smell your desperation from miles away" he avoids her gaze and turns around to take off his shirt and put it in his tennis bag along his racket, but Tashi stands in front of him again "she told me about what happened at the beach" she adds and smirks, Art stops in his tracks at that 'fuck, she knows' he takes advantage of slipping on his unstained t-shirt to hide his red cheeks from your best friend.
"Shouldn't you be worrying about you and Patrick, Tash?" his eyes look down to fix his shirt that looks so ruffled to him right now, "don't worry about me and Patrick, but I have to worry about you two idiots for obvious reasons" Art looks at her confused and waits for her to explain.
Tashi moves her hand up to pat his shoulder, her smirk fading away and giving way to a small smile.
"She's a wonderful person you know? She deserves all the love in the world and I know you've got plenty to give... so don't keep her on the hook for too long" she takes her bag.
"What do you mean?" He frowns, keeping you on the hook? he tought you had changed your mind, considering you didn't approach him not even once after the night at the beach.
Tashi takes one glance at you, and then back to the blond in front of her.
"She's waiting for you to make a move, Art. She's really shy and not really good at these kind of things..." Tashi's gaze flickers at you again... "If she wasn't interested you think she would have come to watch you almost every training day?".
He wants to laugh at that, 'she didn't look shy at the beach' he thinks but doesn't say it out loud "she comes here for me? I thought she's here to see you!" he exclaims.
Tashi can't stop the smile forming on her lips at his outburst, the disbelief in his voice clear as day.
"You can't be that naive, can you?" Tashi teases, her tone lighthearted now, having gone from teasing to trying to comfort him. "Sure, some days she might come here for me, but it's mostly for you, I can assure you, I'm just an added bonus" Tashi concludes and Art feels so stupid, he should've at least tried to talk to you.
"oh..."
Tashi sees his expression change slightly, realization beginning to dawn on him, so she rests a reassuring hand on his shoulder, smiling at him knowingly "don't beat yourself up too much about it, Art. It's never too late to fix your mistake. Believe me, she's really into you... but Art, there are few people I care about more than I care about tennis, and Y/N is one of them, if you hurt her in any way-" Tashi pushes her index finger into his chest, her grin growing devious once again, "-I'll castrate you, then you definitely won't be able to charm her anymore with only your stupid blond curls, understood?" "yes m'am." he answers immediately.
Tashi laughs, finding his quick response both amusing and endearing, her hand moving to ruffle his blond hair. "That's more like it, Donaldson. Keep her safe and you won't have too worry about keeping your body intact. I'm sure you're more than capable of that"
Tashi goes to the changing rooms and Art turns around towards you again, only to see you already looking at him and he smiles widely, now that he knows you didn't change your mind about him, and that's surprising considering the story he told you, he feels like he can actually talk to you without blushing like the teenager he still is.
You blush slightly as he looks at you, a shy smile tugging at the corner of your lips, your heart skips a beat when he flashes that winning smile of his. How he was able to be both endearing and incredibly handsome at the same time was beyond you, but the sight of his bright blue eyes and the way his blonde hair was swept to the side from the light wind was enough to make your breath hitch.
His hand goes up in greeting and you wave back, book now closed and he sign for you to stay there as he walks out of the tennis camp, his steps fast almost in a run and you laugh 'he is so cute' you think. A few minutes later he is next to you on the bleachers.
As he approaches, you can't help but look carefully at his face, a bead of sweat running down his temple form the training he just finished, you curse internally as you feel yourself growing a bit hotter when his arm flexes to let his tennis bag fall on the ground next to him.
Art sits down next to you, taking a moment to catch his breath before turning to you, a cheeky grin on his face.
"hey"
"hi..."
You both giggle for realizing how awkward this moment is.
Art runs his hand through his hair, trying to tame the damp strands and make himself look at least a little bit presentable. "Sorry for this" he pauses for a moment, a smirk coming to his lips, "although I think you kinda like it" you laugh 'fuck, he noticed'.
"Oh shut up, I didn't come here for you" you lie, your cheeks slightly red in fear of being caught "oh, really? a little bird told me otherwise..." he suggests and you would really like the ground to open and swallow you, you bite your lips "I'm going to kill her" you mumble under your breath and Art laughs as he sits down next to you, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
He gazes intently at you, a slight smirk on his lips, "please don't, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her" you frown at his words and seeing your confused expression he keeps going.
"I thought you weren't interested in me anymore, after that night" his smile is sheepish, "the next day, when you and Tashi came to watch the final between me and Patrick you didn't talk to me at all and... I don't know, I felt like I fucked up" his hand goes through his hair, a bit embarrassed to reveal his insecurities to you so soon and you want to slap yourself "Art... no you got it all wrong".
Art blinks in confusion for a moment, his expression changing into a mixture of surprise and relief "so you weren't avoiding me?" he asks, turning his head to peer closely into your eyes, searching for any sign to confirm his words.
"No! well, yes... but it's not cause I wasn't interested in you, the total opposite actually, I'm really bad at these things I didn't know what to do or say" you admit and play around with the cover of the book still on your lap.
Art couldn't help but laugh a little bit at your confession, "If it's any consolation, I think you're doing just fine right now."
He pauses for a moment, reaching out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his blue eyes shining with warmth.
"You could've just told me then, you know?" and he could have done that too.
"I know... I'm sorry" you whine hiding your face in your hands and he rests his left hand on the back of your chair, his body facing you while he waits for you to look at him again "don't be, I could have tried harder too" he comforts you and you look at him again, a sweet smile on his face.
You couldn't help but smile back at him, feeling the tension start to dissipate between you "guess we both messed up then" you laugh, shaking your head in disbelief at the realization of just how much time you wasted because of your mutual shyness.
"But we stil have time to solve this, if you want to, of course" you're nodding even before he can finish the sentence.
Art can't contain his excitement as he sees you enthusiastically nodding your head. He lifts his hand and rests his palm on your cheek, his thumb gently caressing the soft skin "I take that as a yes, then?" he asks, a playful smile on his lips, the thumb on your cheek now tracing the outline of your lips.
"mh-mh" you say unconsciously your eyes locked in his.
Art continues tracing his thumb across your lips, his touch light and almost teasing, feeling your gaze on him, he lifts his eyes to look into yours, a cheeky smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"You look so cute when you're all blushing and flustered" he whispers, leaning a bit closer to your face.
"You talk like you're not in the same position as I am" Art laughs softly, his breath mingling with yours, he leans in closer, the smile on his lips widening as he sees you start to fidget slightly.
"Not like it's a bad thing though, right?" he whispers, his hand moving from your cheek to gently grasp your chin, tilting your head up slightly.
"absolutely not" you whisper and just when your lips are about to touch a voice interrupts the moment "Hey! the camps are closing you have to get out" the coach calls out with a small smirk and Art turns around to look at him embarrassed, ears and cheeks red "sorry coach! we're leaving".
The coach gives a knowing chuckle before heading out again, leaving you and Art to recover from the interruption.
You can't help but feel a twinge of frustration at the coach's interruption, ok, that was embarrassing you put your book back into your bag before sliding it on your shoulder.
Art lets out a small sigh before reluctantly getting up from the bench helping you too by grabbing your hand "sorry about that, the coach has the worst timing" he wants to strangle him, really.
"Don't worry, he is right" you say and he starts to guide you towards the stairs to get out.
Art feels his muscles relax as soon as the cool night breeze hits his skin, he's still hot and sweaty from the training, he glances at you "that was a good session, wasn't it? even with the interruption" he jokes as he looks around, noticing the sun slowly setting behind the trees, lighting the sky in a beautiful shade of pink and orange.
"you did good, I really like to watch you ad Tashi play" you ignore his real intentions and decide to talk about the training itself, you really like to tease him.
Art can't help but let out a small laugh at your response "so that is the only reason why you come to see our trainings? To watch me play?" he quips, his tone light and teasing as he nudges you slightly with his shoulder.
"I already told you Donaldson, I come to see Tashi play, not for you" you taunt again and Art shakes his head in false disbelief, his tone still playful and light "right, how could I forget. Just for Tashi, of course".
He playfully rolls his eyes, his shoulder slightly touching yours as you walk next to him.
"I'm sorry to tell you this, but you can't compete with her" and Art stops on his track a fake shocked expression on his face and you tug on his hand still connected to yours to walk through the campus and towards the dorms.
Art puts a hand over his heart and lets out a mock gasp. "How could you" he says before starting to follow you again, a cheeky smile on his lips as he glances in your direction.
As you both make your way towards the dorms, Art can't help but feel contentment at the sight of your hands connected together, swinging naturally alongside you while you walk. You two stay in comfortable silence until you are in front of your dorm room and your hand detaches from his to grab your key, Art stands behind you, hands in his shorts pockets as he waits for you to turn back to him.
You unlock the door, feeling a flutter of anticipation as you turn to face him again. Art is still standing close, his eyes fixed on you with a warm smile on his handsome features, he takes a step closer, now leaning against the wall next to your door.
The soft light from the hallway casts a gentle glow on him, his blond hair slightly disheveled and he looks so incredibly handsome that you find your breath hitching in your throat
'what should I do now?' you ask yourself as you smile at him, but before you could open your mouth to speak, he does first "not that I don't like to meet you like this, but what would you think about a date? with me, of course" he mentally facepalms himself, 'was it really necessary to add that?' Art feels a faint blush color his cheeks as you laugh at his awkward addition.
He rubs the back of his neck, still smiling sheepishly "sorry, I just wanted to be clear about it, didn't want you to think I was planning a date between you and Tashi" he jokes as he lets out a small laugh of his own, the embarrassment fading away as he sees that you don't seem to mind his blunder.
"But yes, I would love to take you on a date" he says with a more confident tone, his eyes shimmering with excitement at the thought.
"I would love to" Art is filled with contentment as he sees your excitement. He runs his hand through his hair a small smile forms on his lips as he gazes at you, his blue eyes shining with happiness.
"How about tomorrow night? There's this nice restaurant near that I've been wanting to try" he suggests, his voice filled with nerves but anticipation as well.
"Tomorrow is great" you step closer when you see Art bending towards you "good, I'll pick you up tomorrow night at seven" you nod.
As you confirm the time for your date, he can't help but smile wider, the excitement coursing through his veins, he gazes into your eyes for a moment, savoring the anticipation building between you.
"I can't wait" he whispers, his voice filled with excitement and a hint of nerves, leaning closer and placing a soft kiss on your forehead "I'll see you tomorrow" "goodnight, Art".
As you watch Art, his handsome features bathed in the soft light of the hallway, he smiles back at you, his eyes filled with warmth and affection. "Goodnight" he says softly, a small chuckle escaping his lips as he sees you close the door slower than necessary, as if you don't want the moment to end just yet.
"Sweet dreams" he whispers after you close the door, shoulders lighter now that he finally has a real chance with you and the smile on his face doesn't leave until he is asleep in his bed.
━━━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━━━
Do not copy or repost.
#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson x you#art donaldson imagine#art donaldson fluff#art donaldson#challengers fic#challengers
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Ascendant:
Because they are governed by the Water element, they feel deeply the energies around them, they absorb the environment. Their gaze is intense, sharp, they pay attention to things that no one else notices. Their presence is strong, as they are ruled by Pluto, their magnetism is accentuated. They are generally quieter, they are not very receptive, they like to analyze people first and then start introducing themselves. Distrust is a strong characteristic of this Ascendant, who does not feel safe until they have completely read the environment and the people around them. They usually intrigue people because they are mysterious in a certain way. While people are trying to find out more about them, the Scorpio ascendant has already read people to their soul, analyzing their gestures, their posture and, above all, listening to their intuition. They like to change their appearance.
They live life with intensity, giving themselves fully to experiences.
Sun:
Ruled by Pluto, these people are deep, with the Sun in Scorpio nothing just is what it is, everything is intense, bigger, deep. They are reserved people, who generally have some drama in their history, some tra1ma, some pa1n. They understand well that life is not beautiful, they can see the “ugly” that permeates it, which is why they are dense people, with depth, they understand life like no one else.
They undergo transformations in their personality, generally caused by some personal crisis. Like it or not, they are attracted to power, they like the feeling of security it can bring, they tend to have a strong personality, they rarely give in in order to please or obey someone.
Because they are ruled by Pluto, they do things driven by passion, they either love what they do or they don't care at all about it. They are extreme people, with complete surrender on one side and total indifference on the other.
Moon:
Things are felt with all their intensity and, generally, people with this Moon cannot control the intensity of their feelings. Emotions bubble to the surface, sometimes stirring the native of this placement. There is nowhere to run, the emotions are everywhere, and they are very intense. Because they know their emotional world well, these people are capable of having great magnetic power, since Pluto, the ruler of this Moon, teaches the depth of understanding their own pains and loves, giving power to the conscious mind.
When they feel something, it stays with them for a long time, whether the feeling is good or bad.
They do things with all their soul, because only then they can feel satisfaction/fulfillment. Either loving or hating, emotions keep flowing under the deep waters of their feelings.
Mercury:
They are more of the quiet type, but their mind is running deep. Generally people only discover what is happening in their lives when things have already happened or are ending.
This is the Mercury that is obsessed, when they like something, be it a song, an artist, a person, they will want to find out everything about it, they love to know more and more, there is no limit to how much they can absorb when the the subject is the things they like/love. They are intelligent people, they generally know extremely well about a topic, as they have studied it deeply.
They are great at giving advice, however their advice is the very truth that people are not always willing to listen to. They love music, they usually have a favorite genre, music moves them a lot, it makes them feel more intensely about themselves, messing with their mind and interior.
Venus:
This is one of the most powerful Venus in the zodiac. Here Pluto, its ruler, gives physical and psychic magnetism and a powerful aura. The search for power, whether physical or psychological, is great. This Venus slowly permeates the objects of their affection, they may seem indifferent, but it's only because they are working on their magnetism to attract what they want and they usually get it, their vibration is slow and deep, their charm is irresistible.
Their love life is intense and rich, they like to have control over their loved ones, to know their secrets, their emotional intimacies.
Love is felt intensely, when something or someone becomes theirs it will be theirs forever, even if no longer physically.
Mars:
Powerful people. Ruled by Mars and Pluto, these people analyze, intuit, observe very well before acting on what they want. This is the most powerful and silent Mars in the zodiac, their actions are done in silence, in the “shadows”, and that is why most of their plans work out, this Mars doesn't go around saying what they plan on doing. They put together an extremely well planned plan and put it into action, the results speak for themselves.
Controlling. This Mars likes to have things and people under their control, as they love the security and predictability that power brings, they rarely let other people take their power over, especially if they fought to conquer it.
Very quiet and cunning, this Mars is the high octave of Mars in Aries, and here it acts at its full power, they can concentrate all their strength and resources to get what they want, and, no matter how difficult it is, they will persist concentratedly until they obtain the object of their affection, be it a goal, a person or a dream.
Because they are people with a strong personality and even stronger actions, they generally have many enemies, but this Mars knows, however, who they all are.
#astrology#astrology readings#astrology signs#astrology observations#astrology notes#solar return#astro observations#astro notes#astro placements#astro community#astrology placements#asteroids#synastry#lilith synastry#venus in synastry#8th house#astro posts#aries season#aries#aries moon#aries sign#aries sun#taurus#gemini#cancer#leo#virgo#libra#scorpio#sagittarius
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Your posts made me appreciate Shoto again because it seems like he's the only kid who went in with a solid plan about how he wanted to deal with his brother without killing him and made an entire special move to help with that plan and even talked about wanting to know his favorite food. Ochako and Deku really did seem to be just winging it, and Deku was even worse because he only cared about the crying child inside Shigaraki. It's like if Shoto only ever cared about his brothers 12 year old self and not the adult burn victim in front of him.
Thanks! I'm really glad if I can manage to spread some Shouto-appreciation. I think he's way underrated both in-verse and in-fandom for how committed he was to saving Touya.
Maybe because they didn't "talk" so much in the sense like Ochako and Toga did, but their fight was framed in the context of ultimate moves and specifically flashfire being the horrible, violent language they were both were trained in.
Shouto took that "language" that Endeavor imposed on them and quite literally reinvented his quirk based on his heart to be able to stop Touya's fire in the right way. And he did work on that move before the battle, going into the fight with the conviction that "he is me" and clearly worried about Dabi wrecking his own body.
And the way Shouto reinterpreted flashfire was the exact opposite as what Endeavor wanted them to do / to be, the way he was there when Endeavor wasn't, the way he prioritized Touya when Endeavor once again didn't - I think it's the type of "actions speak louder" way of communication that fits Shouto so well.
And since Touya copied Phosphor, I think at least on some level he must have understood what Shouto chose to do there and why and it connects to how he was capable of perceiving Shouto in the end not as some kind of masterpiece monster born to dethrone him but as a part of the family, a brother.
And I also appreciate that Shouto never made his saving conditional on whether he was facing Dabi or Touya. His priority was to try to stop him from burning himself and others up - because in Shouto's mind everyone can change, even the worst monsters.
I find it incredibly sad that because Endeavor was kept alive, Shouto wasn't enough for Touya - they needed a second resolution with Endeavor. I wish we could have seen the original ending - the one planned when Endeavor was set to die in the PLF War Arc.
I won't be happy if the Todoroki family plot ends with Touya dying offscreen or if he doesn't have at least a moment of more direct connection with Shouto. But I also don't trust Horikoshi that he won't make this into all a trophy / reward for Endeavor. In my mind, he really overplays the redemption arcs and overcompensates the characters for their change.
Anyways, while Shouto's endgame is far from perfect, I do appreciate that Phosphor was a really solid move for him, narratively bringing things together and he never strayed into that preachy, hypocrite territory Deku did.
But with Horikoshi ruining or ignoring so much of his own set-up, I'm really worried if he'll just assassinate Shouto's character too now in the last few chapters.
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Blade Imagines
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆
You notice his scars hiding underneath the tailcoat, a silent gasp leaves your throat as you conceal to ask the man beside you.
There are lots of healed scars on his arms and wrist, some are stitched but knowing of his healing abilities, you know it was just like putting broken pieces together, a puzzle to connect.
Blade remains unmoved, you wonder if your pitiful gaze becomes noticeable and you force yourself to look away, afraid of the man getting uncomfortable.
You aren't unfamiliar with scars, some are from battles, while others are inflicted.
As a life-long species of Xianzhou Luofu, you are still capable of dying even if you could live for hundreds of years... Right now you are witnessing a new era of the universe.
You reach for his tailcoat that is on his forearm and he gazes at you from the sudden movement, you look at him, "Let me fold that for you,"
Blade looks at you reluctantly before handing it over, you neatly fold his coat and set it on your lap. "Instead of getting it wrinkled." You smile at him and all you get in return is a stare.
From your eyes, Blade looks and behaves like a cat whenever he's around you, he's distant yet if you don't give him much attention he will approach you, discreet and cautious. When you talk to him, there are barely any responses that you've gotten used to his nonverbal ones, still, reading through him is still a hard time to do.
All in all, you entirely don't get this man.
As you return your attention to your phone, you scroll mindlessly through the screen, switching to different media and distracting yourself at the mean time.
You didn't even notice that Blade was looking at you again, he pondered while his eyes bore at you.
Why are you so engraved on that phone? He even catches you smiling at the screen from time to time whenever he lets his eyes stare at you as he studies your features, your face, your eyes, your lips that crescent when you smile, your laugh that subdued everything from his ears, even he swore the mara within him calms down through your voice.
Truly, you are a wonder.
Blade leans in and rests his head on top of yours, closing his eyes. He does not add anymore weight on you knowing you are much more fragile than his body that handled many fights from the past that he grew from the pain.
"Are you alright?" You asked, and Blade didn't respond.
Knowing his usual demeanor, you didn't push further and kept silent, returning your gaze to the phone.
But minutes of scrolling, boredom gets the best of you and you sigh, returning your attention to Blade's scars. You listened to his calm breathing.
Your hand trailed off to his and caress the bandaged hand, fingers overlapping on the gauze and your fingertips to his slim fingers.
"When will you let me rest?" You heard him, causing you to jolt and pulled away in an instant.
"Sorry."
Blade sighs and stands up.
"Get up."
Blade reached for your hand and you were pulled to his own room where Blade threw his tailcoat on the nearby chair and he changed into a usual clothing. Not everyday you get to see him in just his shirt and pants, but it's not new to you.
You remain standing in the middle of the room, waiting for his instructions.
He then sat on the bed and looked at you, a silent command for you to get closer. You take a few steps until you're standing in front of him and he gently pulls you down to the bed, where Blade suddenly rests on top of you. His weight is definitely greater than you, but you don't complain, his warmth eases your tensed body.
Blade sighs heavily and you reluctantly place your hands around him as his hair tickles your neck.
"Those scars.." You mumbled, Blade groans and didn't budge, thus you continued your rambling. "I know you're immortal, but still, do take care of your body."
"They heal, it's no matter." He replied, somehow his hold on you getting tighter.
"They do, but it will still remain on your body, a reminder."
"Forget about those things." Blade ended the conversation, yet with your kind soul he is fond of that Blade would not willingly say out loud, you remain silent for a moment.
"Someday, once the deal has been fulfilled... Forget it. In the meantime, I wish you would take care of yourself."
You look at him and meet with the crown of his hair, you stroke his head and the softness of his hair soothes your palm. A word was left unsaid that you wished you had said.
"I still care for you."
#pale writes 18#honkai star rail#blade x reader#blade x you#hsr blade#blade x female reader#blade x y/n#blade x gender neutral reader#hsr#hsr blade x reader
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In honor of the 11th anniversary of EAH, I thought of sharing a WIP from my current animation. However, I realized that I haven't posted it's older, original version from 2 years ago here on tumblr yet, which is weird considering how many times I've mentioned it in other posts, so it's here now!
In a way, the animation (old and current) is a reflection of how I've changed over the years. I made the first half (the part with simple eyes 😶) in my early highschool years, and I made the 2nd half (the part with regular eyes 👁👁) in the later highschool years. The artstyle wasn't consistent, but I enjoyed the process. From where this video ends, I was halfway done, and I probably could've finished if I kept up the pace. But that's not what happened.
I wasn't satisfied with how the vid was looking, especially because I wasn't doing proper lineart, but I didn't want to drop the project. Instead, I decided to work on Brooke's animation rig, which was meant to be in the EAH style, and I got the idea to make the whole project puppet-animated EAH style. My struggle with making Brooke should've been enough to warn me that was a poor idea, but I still spent a year trying to make that happen. I didn't get very far, and by the end of that year, I stopped working on the project.
Eventually, at the start of this year, I decided to pick it back up again with a new goal in mind. I wouldn't be lazy, but I'd also make sure to not spend too much effort to the point of burnout. I would animate using puppets, but it would be in my artstyle, not someone else's. I intend to get this done, and I can't wait to show you guys the final video! Also here's some bits of "development" (if you could call that) behind the animation.
This is my oc Allison in the 3 different versions of the EAH rig, each labeled accordingly.
This is the final base rig, which can turn a full 360 degrees and has decent expression capabilities. The only characters ever put onto this rig were Apple, Allison, and Brooke, because the amount of effort it took for each character's details was too much. Apple alone was a nightmare to rig because of all the layers in her hair, and expressions only worked from the front.
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knowing [8/8]
Summary: Sanji knew you were the one the moment he met you.
Pairing: Sanji x Reader
Warnings: None really. Normal One Piece stuff I guess.
Note: I changed my mind, I'm posting this today because I loved this and just can't wait any longer. Thank you all for reading this little fanfic!! I wrote this before I fully finished reading Wano, so it's not 100% accurate at first, but that's fine, this is a fanfic of course. I hope you all enjoy, and I do have another two one-shots connected to this series!
Taglist:
@jzkeisuke | @arcanumlaw
[Ch. 1] ● [Ch. 2] ● [Ch. 3] ● [Ch. 4] ● [Ch. 5] ● [Ch. 6] ● [Ch. 7]
With Big Mom and Kaido defeated, Wano freed from the Animal Kingdom Pirates reign, you were beyond relieved when you'd heard you could all rest. Luffy and Zoro seemed near death, both had just woken up when you'd snuck out with Sanji to another area. He still needed rest more than you, and Chopper had followed along to make sure neither of you did anything to upset your wounds. You'd made it out with a few small burns, some scrapes and cuts, a slightly deeper wound on your abdomen, but Chopper had taken great care of you and gotten you as close to 100% as he could. Sanji too of course, he suffered slightly worse wounds than you did, but the geishas had taken great care of him and he had nowhere near the same battle damage as the other two members of your monster trio. Chopper had instructed him to lay down and rest, which Sanji did, trusting your doctor that he knew what was best, despite his wanting to join in whatever party was being started in the other room. You knew there was no way the people of Wano would let you leave without a large celebration, Sanji would just have to wait for that.
After Chopper left the infirmary you'd walked off to, you gave Sanji a smile while saying something about changing your own bandages real quick. Despite your insistence that it was fine, he looked away while you stripped off your shirt to change your bandages, instead quietly pulling something small out of his pocket to occupy his eyes, wondering if now was the best time or if he should wait.
"What's that you've got there, Sanji?"
Your voice brought him out of his millions of thoughts, making him decide that yes now's the time, before he smiled softly and held it up, making your eyes widen and your mouth open just a bit.
There's no way…no way, right?
"I picked this up in Dressrosa."
"Sanji, you did not."
Sanji grinned at you, nodding happily. "I did! I saw it and…I thought of you instantly."
It was a small ring he held in his hand, a thin silver band with some blue gem on it, perhaps a small sapphire, you weren't sure, but it was very pretty to you anyway. You didn't care for gaudy, showy jewelry anyway, so if this really was an engagement ring, you were all too ready to accept.
Even without a ring you'd accept. You loved Sanji, more than anything. If he had shown up to the women's bunks in his pajamas without a ring at 3am and asked you to marry him, you would accept even then. The middle of battle, though not his style, you'd say yes. An evening after dinner where you'd both drank a little too much and were giggly messes, if he said 'marry me' you'd accept instantly, whether you remembered it the next morning or not.
It didn't matter. You'd marry Sanji no matter how he proposed.
"Maybe I'm crazy, or all that wedding talk because of them got to me, or even us playing husband and wife for the time we did here, but…I'm certain of this." His voice was quiet, even though it was just the two of you at the moment, and it made you start to tear up.
It definitely was crazy. The fight with Kaido and Big Mom had ended just two days ago, you were still surprised Sanji was even capable of walking and sitting up right after his fight against Queen. You half wondered if he suffered a blow to the head that knocked something loose that was making him do this right now.
But really, you knew he hadn't. He was mentally sound, he knew what he was doing.
"Sanji…"
"I'm probably the worst mess of a man you've ever met, I'm worthless really, but I know I love you," Sanji smiled softly while you cried and gladly held your hand out for him to take when he reached out for it, "I don't want to ever again look at another woman the way I look at you. I can't imagine myself with anyone else, married to anyone else, becoming a parent with anyone else, if we're so blessed. Everything that's happened recently just made me more aware of that."
Sanji moved more towards the edge of the bed while gently pulling you closer to him. You couldn't have cared less if he was on one knee or not, it didn't matter to you.
What mattered was that it was Sanji.
You wished you weren't crying, especially when he pulled you down beside him, just to place his forehead against yours and wipe your happy tears away.
"I love you so much, [Y/N]. You mean the world to me and I just want to be with you forever. I wanted to ask you weeks ago now, even when we all met up again in Sabaody…but now feels like the perfect time. Please, [Y/N], will you marry me?"
Trying your hardest to stop crying, you nodded and kissed him, hoping he didn't mind your salty, teary kisses.
"Yes! Yes, a million times yes, my dear!"
Sanji pulled you into a tight hug that you returned, telling you again that he loved you and you responded in kind. You took a few minutes to fully calm down, and once you did, you let Sanji put the ring he'd bought all the way back in Dressrosa on your finger, not at all surprised it was a perfect fit. Of course he knew your ring size, either that or he borrowed one of your rings you wore for fun and took it with him to get the right size.
"A perfect fit."
"Just like us." You smiled brightly at Sanji, which he returned before kissing you again.
Your sweet moment was interrupted when the door to the infirmary almost flew open, and you jumped back up a bit, only to be relieved when you saw it was Zoro, who looked like he didn't know what he was even doing there.
"What do you want, moss head??"
"...looking for Chopper." Zoro's eye wandered over to you, noticing you'd been crying and he looked almost ready to cut down Sanji, until he took in the fact you now had a ring on your finger.
That same ring he'd watched Sanji pick out in Dressrosa.
"Oh!" You nodded, giving a smile. "He left a while ago, said he was going to go check on the Samurai and Luffy!"
Zoro nodded, turning to leave before he stopped and looked over his shoulder at you. "Congrats. If he hurts you, let me know and I'll kill him."
"Zoro!"
"As if you could, moss head!!"
"Sanji, stay in bed!" You pushed him back down when he went to get up, a scowl on his face while Zoro left and closed the door behind him. Sanji started complaining to you about the "stupid moss head" and how he couldn't touch him, but it made you laugh.
"What's so funny?"
"Oh…it's just…it's like a little brother protecting his big sister…that's all Zoro means by it."
Somehow, Sanji understood what you meant when you said that. If his family had been different, he probably would have been the same with Reiju, protective of her when any potential boyfriends or suitors would come to see her, if they ever did considering how their father was. If your lives were different, if you had met under different circumstances, he was sure your biological brothers would be the same.
While he was thinking about it, Sanji barely realized you had crawled into bed with him, until you wrapped your arms around him and hugged him close. He did the same, kissing the top of your head as well.
"I love you, Sanji."
"I love you too."
I can't wait to marry you.
+!+
Once the Thousand Sunny had taken off from Wano, your next destination decided by the log pose, you were determined to be married with your found family as the witnesses. While in Wano, you and Sanji had slipped away to find something like a courthouse, whatever their equivalent was, to get a marriage certificate so you could have a small ceremony on the Sunny. It took a bit of time, but you found a place that processed marriage certificates and got one printed immediately, knowing that technically, as soon as you signed and dated it, you'd be husband and wife.
You hadn't told anyone yet, Zoro would never, you knew that, but you had told Sanji you wanted everyone there and to be married on the ship you called home. He quickly agreed, telling you that he'd do whatever you wanted for the wedding, while thinking it was the best place for you two to get married. You were both absolutely sure your crewmates would be happy for you, they'd all be glad to participate in the wedding and help you two tie the knot.
You also made Sanji promise not to spend so much time on the cake or to make it too big, though you had to give some leeway there due to Luffy. But he promised he wouldn't work on it so much that he was doing last minute touches when he was supposed to be saying his vows to you. You didn't want the wedding to be an extravagant, fancy affair. Just something small and simple with everyone you loved there.
Sanji didn't tell you, though, that he'd talked to Nami and told her you two were engaged and wanting to get married as soon as possible. She was so happy for the two of you that she burst into tears and hugged him, about to run off to find you when he stopped her. He wanted to surprise you with your parents and siblings at the ceremony, and knew your home was an island in the New World, so Nami put the ship on a detour there in the middle of the night when Sanji had a night watch, so no one would have any idea. There were no questions about where the ship was heading the next morning, and Nami was constantly talking about romance and things like that to you, trying to get you to spill your engagement to her. Anything she said you related back to Sanji with a smile, annoying her that you were acting so dense.
It was about two days before your unknown arrival to your home island that Sanji convinced you to tell everyone. You had gone over it multiple times in your head, wondering if it was a good time, before he told you that you'd probably never be ready to tell them, so might as well do so now. When he said that, you ended up agreeing and when everyone was on the deck that night, Sanji told them all you two had an announcement to make.
"You guys aren't gonna leave, are you??" Luffy was so terribly concerned that you and Sanji had chosen to leave the crew, but you quickly reassured him it wasn't anything like that.
"No, no, not at all! We," you took a breath and smiled at Sanji, taking his hand, "We've decided to get married."
"Ahh!"
"And we want the ceremony to be on Sunny in a few days."
"AHH!!"
Everyone was so excited for the two of you! Nami immediately ran over and hugged you, Robin joining her after a moment and both asking to see your ring, where Sanji got it, and what you were going to wear. Luffy laughed a bit and threw himself on Sanji, saying he was glad for the two of you. Brook said something weird about marriage; Franky was crying but patting Sanji on the back; Usopp wanted to know when and how you'd be married without a priest; Chopper said he was very excited for the two of you; Jimbei also gave his congratulations, saying he may not have known you both very long, but you seemed like quite the loving couple, and Zoro, who still viewed you as his sister, reiterated his previous statement of being willing to kill Sanji if he ever hurt you. Before Sanji could argue back at him, Zoro put a hand on his shoulder and congratulated him, causing everyone that heard him to be shocked, and then even more surprised when Sanji thanked him.
The Straw Hats threw a celebration party for the two of you the rest of the night, almost like an engagement party. There was a point where Sanji had slipped away, knowing you were in good hands with Nami and Robin, who were trying to help you decide on a few things for the wedding. He went back to your shared room, picking up the transponder snail you'd bought a while back, and made a call to the Baratie. He didn't let whoever picked up know it was him, requesting to speak to Zeff personally.
"Hey, old man, it's me."
"Sanji? What's this about, calling after heading off two years ago?"
"I…I had some news I wanted to tell you, that's all."
He couldn't see him, but Zeff was a slight bit concerned with how calm Sanji sounded, to the point he made him hold on while he transferred the call over to his personal snail.
"Sanji, you in here?" You had gone searching for your fiance once you noticed he was missing and found him in your room, he waved you over to sit beside him on the bed while he waited for Zeff to get back on the phone. "Who'd you call?"
"Zeff."
"Ooooh." You nodded and took his free hand in yours, Sanji gripping it tightly, nervously waiting.
"All right, what'd you wanna tell me, kid?"
"I'm…getting married in a few days. I just…I wanted you to know."
It was quiet for a bit, and you worried that maybe Zeff was angry that this was the first thing he'd heard from Sanji in over two years, but then heard laughter.
"So! You finally found a girl willing to put up with you, huh?"
You giggled and Sanji smiled.
"I found a girl that's done more than just put up with me."
The two of you stayed on the line with Zeff for a while longer, Sanji's tight grip on your hand loosening after he realized Zeff was truly happy for him. Eventually you decided to let him have his privacy with his true father, kissing his cheek and returning to the party your crewmates were still throwing.
You finally decided you'd get married four days later, the two of you were ready for this step and didn't want anything to interfere, not the Marines or another pirate, nothing.
However, when Nami had said you'd all reached an island to dock at, your breath caught in your throat and you started to tear up when you recognized the pier, despite it being nearly seven years since you'd last been there.
"This…this is my home."
"Yeah," Sanji held your hand and gave you a smile, "I…figured you'd want your family there when we got married, so I asked Nami if we could take a detour. Is…is this okay?"
You looked up at him and smiled brightly, despite the tears threatening to fall down your face. "Of course!!"
Once the Sunny was fully docked, you didn't bother waiting for your allowance from Nami, grabbing Sanji by the arm and dragging him in the direction of your childhood home. None of your crewmates bothered to stop you, they did stop Luffy from following and getting in the way of you introducing your fiance to your family.
To your surprise, your family already knew you were on the way, you figured Sanji had something to do with that as well (you'd be correct if you asked him). Your mom was the first to hug you, telling you how much she missed you and how beautiful you'd become in the last few years. Your dad told you the same, before he and your mom introduced themselves to Sanji, you weren't at all surprised at how easily he won them over despite not being able to ask their permission to marry you.
All your siblings ended up running at you when they knew you were there, and it made you beyond happy to see you had a new sister after all. She was a little more shy around you, but Sanji speaking to her convinced her that everything was all right. Everyone ended up mentioning how they had copies of your wanted poster, your brothers would brag to their friends that their big sister was a badass pirate while your sisters would use that as leverage against the boys in town they didn't like, and it all made you blush and become flustered.
Your parents insisted the two of you and the rest of your crewmates join them for dinner, which you happily accepted and so did Luffy when he heard. Your family gladly accepted your found family, sharing stories and having a lovely time with everyone around.
It got to be a little much for you, you had to step out on the porch for a bit so you didn't get too overwhelmed, Sanji following you a moment later to make sure you were okay.
"You know, sometimes, I wonder what would've happened if I hadn't left."
"Oh yeah?" Sanji smiled a bit while lighting a cigarette and watching you.
You nodded, sitting down with your legs dangling off the edge of the porch, your youngest sister having followed you and Sanji out the door and now cuddling next to you. She'd opened up quickly and became attached to you and Sanji.
"I wonder if we ever would have met."
"I still would've found you."
"You're sure about that?" You laughed a bit, but Sanji sat down beside you, putting his arm around your shoulders.
"Luffy still would have come to the Baratie and convinced me to join him. We'd still have all the same adventures, and eventually end up here…where I'd find you. And I'd still be attracted to you, and try to get you to come with us, and we'd still end up together."
Humming a bit, you nodded.
"I know you'd still find me."
+!+
The next day was your wedding. You'd woken up early with a bit of happy anxiety, Nami and Robin were already up and ready to help you get dressed and do your hair. You'd ended up buying a white sundress with a [f/c] colored sash around the waist and white flats to make it simple, you never really wanted a fancy wedding dress anyway. Nami took a curling iron to your hair and added some soft curls, while Robin brought you a flower crown your sisters had made overnight for you to wear in place of a veil. Both girls were still beyond excited for you, and Nami kept giving you hugs through the morning. You and her were like sisters at this point, she'd already called being aunt to any kids you and Sanji may have in the future. Having her and Robin with you helped calm your nerves, and you were more than ready to get married to the love of your life.
Sanji, though, was almost a nervous wreck. He'd already gone through half a pack of cigarettes, before he even got dressed for your wedding. You'd told him during the events at Whole Cake Island that you really preferred black suits on him, so he gladly got one specifically for your wedding, choosing a [f/c] colored tie to match with you. He didn't know why he was so nervous, probably the fears that he wasn't good enough for you and wouldn't be able to make you happy were the cause, but he couldn't stop his racing mind. He tried everything but went back to smoking as his stress reliever, worried you'd change your mind at the last second and leave him.
"She's not gonna leave you."
Surprisingly, Zoro was the one to get Sanji to calm down.
"And what if she does?"
"She won't. She wouldn't have agreed to marry you and plan a wedding so quickly if she wasn't sure about it. If she didn't want to be with you she would've rejected your ass all the way back at Alabasta."
"What. How do you know about that?! I thought you didn’t know until Skypiea!"
Zoro rolled his visible eye and smirked.
"You guys weren't exactly subtle back then. Freaking weirdos making out in the kitchen."
Despite Zoro being amused, Sanji knew he was right. If you really didn't love him and were going to leave, you probably would have done so after everything that happened with his family and that attempted arranged marriage. Instead you had stuck by him, giving him a smile and hug when he first told you how much he loved you, repeating it to him every day since you all had left Thriller Bark, telling him even more so after you'd retrieved him from his screwed up family, giving him the time he needed before showering him in hugs, kisses, and constant 'I love you's so he knew you'd never leave him or let him go again, and that you understood what he was doing when he fought with Luffy and 'broke up' with you in front of his brothers and sister. When he told you everything about his childhood, despite your crying and wishing you'd been born in the North Blue so you could have been his friend, you accepted every bit of it, telling him how much his mother must have loved him and you would have loved to have met her. He'd never felt more relieved than when you said his past didn't matter, the things his father said didn't matter. What mattered was that he was Sanji and you loved him. That was the first time he'd cried to you, hugging you and letting you stroke his hair, while he thanked you for loving a “failure” like him.
"You're not a failure. You're Sanji, and you're perfect as you are."
Sanji knew Zoro was right, you'd never leave him. If you did he'd fight to get you back, but he was sure that wouldn't be necessary.
"Yeah, you're right. Thanks."
"No problem. …don't tell anyone about this."
"Wouldn't dare."
+!+
Your wedding ceremony went off without a hitch, several hours ago now, and you and Sanji were finally married. While you were being wed, you couldn't stop smiling and crying lightly, Sanji giving you soft sweet smiles while he held your hands. Your mother, Nami, Franky, and Brook were all blubbering messes, you wondered if they'd actually heard anything the whole time. Your dad was slightly teary, but he'd never fully admit that to you. All your siblings were excited, more so that they were on a pirate ship but your wedding was a nice excuse to be on the ship. Luffy couldn't stop grinning, he was beyond happy for the two of you. Usopp was also slightly teary, mostly because he couldn't believe you two were actually getting married. Chopper was anxiously waiting for when he could have cake, but he had told you when he saw you earlier that day that he thought you looked pretty. Robin smiled, looking at you like you were her baby sister who was getting married and she couldn't have been happier for you both. Jimbei acted as your priest, after you learned he actually could legally perform marriages, you practically begged him to be the one to marry you. He agreed quickly and you were grateful for it. Zoro, always the quiet one, watched without much emotion visible on his face, but those of you who knew him well enough could see he was happy for you.
Of course, you and Sanji were the happiest ones there. Your ceremony wasn't long, it didn't need to be really, just something small to show you were committed to each other, now and forever. When Jimbei pronounced you husband and wife, and said Sanji could kiss you, you had to keep yourself from almost bouncing out of your shoes in excitement. Once he did kiss you, everyone cheered for you, which made you giggle after breaking the kiss and giving Sanji a smile that he returned.
"We're married!"
He couldn't help it, Sanji picked you up and spun you around, he was so happy! You two had gone from awkwardly facing your feelings for each other, to now being deeply in love, and married finally. He set you back down, only to kiss you again, laying his forehead against yours afterwards.
"I love you, ma femme."
"I love you too, my husband!"
"Come on you lovebirds, let's start the reception!"
The reception, which was really just a normal Straw Hat party, went on for several hours. You had to step away at one point to bid farewell to your family, none of whom wanted to see you go but they understood you couldn't stay on your island for more than a few days, and the Sunny would be taking off in the morning.
Sanji noticed quickly you'd disappeared from his side while he was fighting to keep Luffy from finishing off your piece of cake, and when he saw where you were, he put Zoro in charge of keeping Luffy at bay so he could go stay with you.
Your family had already walked off the dock and back into town when you felt Sanji wrap his arms around your waist and place his chin on the top of your head.
"We'll come back someday."
"I know we will."
"And you can always call or write."
You nod, looking up at Sanji with a smile. "This was a wonderful surprise, thank you. It meant a lot to have them here."
Sanji returned your smile, kissing your forehead. "Anything for you, mon amour."
You were about to suggest the two of you slip out and go off to bed, before Luffy shouted your names.
"Come oooonnnn!! The party's for you guys!" Really he just wanted more cake, but Sanji and Zoro had stopped him from having anything more until you had what you wanted.
Grumbling a bit, Sanji pulled away but still held your waist, causing you to giggle a bit and turn around in his hold, putting your arms around his shoulders.
"A bit longer, then we'll go to bed." You whispered before kissing him with a smile.
He sighed but still nodded. "Fine, fine."
Your reception continued well into the night, you avoided drinking too much so you'd remember it not only in the morning but in years to come. Eventually everyone had either passed out or was calmed down enough to start cleaning, refusing any help from you or Sanji and telling you to both go on to bed, with a kind a smile from Robin or Nami but a sly smirk from Franky.
Once you did, you both simply admired each other's ring and how right it felt to have them now. Within a few more minutes your exhaustion was taking over and you took Sanji's hand in yours, snuggling right up next to him, causing him to do the same with you. You'd consummate your marriage another night, but for tonight, all you wanted was to bask in the fact you were married to the love of your life, and enjoy the warmth that came from knowing that you were his and he was yours. Sanji had tried to say something to you at one point, but you were so near sleep you didn't hear him, except for when he chuckled lightly and kissed the top of your head.
"I love you, [Y/N]...in every lifetime and every universe, I'll always love you."
#one piece x reader#reader insert#sanji x reader#blackleg sanji x reader#knowing fanfic#fem!reader#black leg sanji x reader
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in regards to the concept of abled people not existing/abled folks being expected to do more in relationships with disabled folks... You make some good points about us all being disabled in different ways and not recognizing it, but I still feel that there's quite a vsst gap materially between say, an ADHDer who can lift and push 50lbs easily/without pain and one who can't. And i have run into big roadblocks in relationships with other lefty types as the person who can't! And I think that expectation should be talked about and accepted more because I know a lot of "leftists" who would never think to apply this to stuff like doing the dishes because they're hellbent on everyone doing Equal Amounts. It's all fun and IG graphics about disability justice until they decide that youre Nonbinary roomate named sock who doesnt do the dishes etc etc , then see yourselves to the door!
You're absolutely right that there are differences in what various disabled people can do and the privileges that affords. It's glaringly obvious as a problem in Autism spaces, where people who can mask and speak like me are listened to and trusted and frequently talk over people who are nonverbal and cannot mask.
Even there, though, there are massive problems in attempting to rank-order someone's level of ability rather than just speaking specifically about these things in terms of privileges and oppressions. People assume I'm capable of all kinds of things I am not capable of, for instance, or hold me to ableist standards of productivity and ability because I "seem more capable. And Autistic people whose disabilities are more obvious have the opposite problem -- they are denied agency, presumed to be incompetent, not permitted to take on challenges they could find stimulating and worthwhile, and are dehumanized, etc.
And so where I'm getting with this is that we can't determine from the outside what a person is capable of doing, or what they should be capable of doing. It's not that far of a logical path to go from saying "Oh, this ADHDer is not physically disabled, they can lift 50 pounds, they can do a lot of things that I can't do" to saying "This ADHDer didn't unpack all our luggage for two weeks after our trip, they are lazy and not pulling their weight."
Someone might have the literal physical ability to do something in terms of strength or mobility, but not have the ability to complete a task because of the disabilities they do have (ADHD, in this case), and even if we are disabled ourselves we may be primed to see those people as lazy, uncaring, not pulling their weight, and all kinds of ableist interpretations.
So broadly I get your point, it is undoubtedly true some of us have abilities that others don't. but I think there's no way to put this idea into practice beyond just trusting people when they say they cannot do a thing, and not passing harsh judgement against people we think ought to be able to do a thing but don't (and maybe can't). This goes back to the original point of the discussion -- wondering why so many other people seem to fail disabled people and not show up for them.
To your second point, about a lot of even leftist people bringing therapy and instagram infographic "boundary setting" advice to their relationships and expecting all chores to be divided up equally, yeah that's a big problem and it's been a big problem in interpersonal relationships for many decades at this point. Most people overestimate the portion of the chores that they do, underestimate the work their partners or housemates do, and aspire to "equity" in a way that drives them absolutely crazy with score-keeping and resentment. There's a lot of research on how that outlook absolutely poisons heterosexual relationships and has done so pretty much ever since women started getting the ability to say no to a chore. It's a big problem of individualism under capitalism at its root, I think.
And the social change needed is much the same thing -- people need to learn to actually trust their loved ones when they say they cannot do the dishes, cannot clean the gutters, can't drop off the rent check, etc. I think a disability justice politics of raising everyone's class consciousness regarding their own disabilities and others is the way to go, and a massive strengthening of community ties.
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Ok so I’m gonna go through this scene cause some people need it but also cause I really love it so here we go:
Tommy asks if Bobby is okay, and Buck gives him an update (a positive one thank goodness)
Tommy makes a joke about how the 118 should have their own dedicated wing at the hospital (which is so true of him to say), but it’s obvious Buck is not feeling it
Tommy notices, and asks if Bucks okay, in which Buck opens up about how Bobby is more of a dad to him than his own father
This leads to Tommy opening up about his own dad (Tommy lore!!!) and how Gerrard was not an improvement whatsoever (obviously) (also that’s really depressing. Buck you better cuddle with this man rn)
Then Buck starts the iconic part of the conversation, “So maybe we both have daddy issues.” If you’ve paid attention to Buck at all during this show, it’s very obvious that by the tone of his voice and the look in his eyes/face that he’s flirting
And of course we all know the rest, with Tommy returning Bucks flirty energy - “I don’t.” “But you think I do?” “God, I hope so.” Which first of all, Tommy’s voice for the “god, I hope so” has me going insane and if I was Buck I would’ve passed out, and second of all, Buck’s “but you think I do” is very much him still being flirty and trying to get a reaction from Tommy (and he succeeds)
And that’s the end of the scene, where Buck and Tommy are both pleased with the direction their conversation went
For such a short scene, I love how much we got out of them. And for such a short scene, it’s insane how much backlash it’s getting by certain people. Somehow people are saying that Tommy made the conversation sexual right after Buck was vulnerable about his dad, and how that’s messed up, but that’s literally not what happened? If anything, BUCK is the one that made the conversation sexual after Tommy was vulnerable. And you know what? That’s completely okay, because they’re grown adults and have the capability of changing the vibe of a conversation. If Tommy didn’t like the direction Buck was going, he would have stopped it from going further. But he didn’t. Because again, they’re two grown men. Dang I didn’t really mean to go on a rant, but I’m so tired of the horrible takes of this scene. I’m glad that all the people I’m following are also loving this scene and Tommy and bucktommy (though I guess kinkley works better now huh)
#what it boils down to is this:#buck initiated the flirting#tommy matched his energy#I didn’t really mean for this to get so long whoops#guess I had a lot to say#evan buckley#tommy kinard#911 abc#bucktommy
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astarion x gn!dark urge!reader. pure fluff and soft feelings
when astarion feels the sudden thrum of the tadpole stirring, psionic energy flooding into his head and spreading through him like dense, rippling waves, he isn't keen to open the door for whoever wants in. his brows knot, his eyes flutter open as he exhales a frustrated breath, his meditations rudely interrupted. wind flutters over his tent, crisp night air whispering in blades of grass. he can hear the crackle of the distant campfire. and yet, this new persistent ringing in his ears drowns out everything — it echoes through his veins, calls out to him, somehow.
trying to ignore the sensation proves futile. he almost starts to push back against it. he thinks of channeling some sort of rebuttal, a potent force of his own to tell whoever is letting their tadpole loose to shut up, but he doesn't. at once, as the feeling begins to change, he stops. sharply, he inhales, warmth inviting him in to stay, enveloping him in a sudden, extrasensory sense of comfort. fog fills what remains of his thoughts.
there's a heavy feeling that roots into him; the sensation of wading through thick, muddy water. then, your presence, your mind, entwining with his. visions form in the wake of your bridged connection. astarion realizes with a lilt in his heart that he is seeing what you're seeing.
except, the first thing he sees is himself.
hazy and dizzy, all blurred lines and smudged edges. pointed ears that stick out from fluffy white hair. a confident smile that flashes sharp teeth. pretty features, and stark, red eyes. he's looking at himself. he knows it's him; the heat in your brain tells him so, even if he was hardly capable of making the connection.
his throat grows dry. in the illusion, you're standing close to him. he senses the nervousness in your veins, feels the careful palm that settles on your shoulder as if it had settled on his own. when he moves — his vision counterpart, not actually him — it's reminiscent of strokes of paint on parchment, everything seeming indistict, real and fake at the exact same time. briefly, he wonders if he's truly this beautiful, or if it's just your own mind's assertion. faux-astarion tilts in closer to you, breath warm on the column of your neck, and your body shakes with a full-blown tremor.
oh. you're dreaming.
how sweet. real-astarion can't help but feel a smile tugging at his cheeks. he props his head up on his arm, getting comfortable, and allows the misty connection to drown him. this afternoon, you were just arguing, going back and forth over something he barely remembers now. yet, here you are. and here he is, showing up in your dreams.
for someone who's been turning him down at every opportunity, frequently reminding him to watch himself at every enticing comment and fanged grin, shooting him a glare made of daggers each time he "accidentally" bumps into you, or leans close enough to mutter words into your ear he definitely could have just said aloud — for someone who claims to hate him, clearly, you must feel something different. he knew you didn't like him. thought you couldn't stand anything to do with him. but gods, the dream you're having right before him, of him, is a pleasant, gratifying contradiction.
you probably hadn't meant for him to intrude, he figures. fast asleep in your bedroll, you're curled up all alone, finally getting some rest after a long day of travelling. your tadpole might've reached out on its own, or perhaps he's the only one to see, because he's the only person still awake.
regardless, astarion doesn't dwell much on the logistics. he focuses on the vision, on the sensations swirling through you, and then through him, in turn. you relax when his palm brushes your lower back — astarion feels the sensation from your point of view, but he tries to imagine how it might feel for him. how your back would arch into his touch at the simplest brush of his fingers.
he watches himself, lips trailing your neck, teeth grazing your pulse, making your eyes close and your shoulders tense. and when he speaks, it's what you remember of his smooth, honeyed voice. the words are muddled as they echo in your skull, then his.
"what is it you want, darling?"
astarion, still smugly watching from the comfort of his tent as your dream plays out, breathes a slight, quiet chuckle to himself. he feels the heat of your anger, bristling and boiling underneath his skin. but he also feels contentment. excitement, perhaps.
"I don't want anything from you," you're snapping in response, quick and sharp, as always. your last word is particularly laced with vitriol, contrasting delightfully with the sweet moniker he uses for you instead. there's that familiar expression on your face again, an annoyed pout he's always loved to draw out of you. he wonders, if he were to see you in more than just your mind, would you be pouting in your sleep, too?
teeth gritting, jaw tense, you press your palm to the vampire's chest, threatening to shove him away — but somehow, you don't. you can't.
"honestly," he tuts, his breath fanning over your skin as he laughs, "if — for once — you did away with your blasted pride, we might actually get along."
you answer swiftly and concisely. "definitely not."
astarion grins. dream-him isn't wrong.
"if you're so insistent on refusing to admit it, knock yourself right out. but there is something you want. and there just so happens to be something I want, all the same."
he continues, as his palm moves up ever-so carefully, brushing over your spine while he goes. "this doesn't have to be complicated, dear. think of it as... a transaction. you let me into that complicated little head of yours," he's murmuring into your ear at barely more than a whisper, his touch is tracing between your shoulder blades now, with teasing and practiced precision; "and I'll help you forget. you'll forget your stresses. your worries. your... dark impulsions. isn't that what you want? what you need?"
you freeze, solid under his touch like a marble statue. astarion senses the softness in your heart, he feels the threads of your dream shimmer and quake. when he hears himself speak next, his voice is more assured. it's comforting to you, in it's own way. a solid rock to cling to, as your veins thrum with shadow, and emotion.
"I know how much they've been affecting you," he says, speaking carefully. "you hardly sleep, and even when you do, each night is restless. you're scared, aren't you? more than you've been trying to let on. tell me, how long do you think it's been since someone touched you? could you and a lover ever grow close, without the poor soul fearing you might wind up taking their head?"
astarion swallows, his focus on your dream fading ever-so briefly. those felt like your words, your worries, reflected in him, and echoed back. as if it were his own — just like his own, really — he can feel your doubt, your loneliness. no, the version of him you're dreaming of is different. until now, he never knew how scared you truly were.
your mind twists, as you try to recall something, anything, to no avail. your strain and hurt shudders across him, lessened only by the softest press of the dream's lips to your pulse.
"let me help you," he murmurs. "let me take everything away."
"astarion-"
your body tenses. several pictures flash through your mind, as if your dream can't decide which one to settle on. they're different from what he was expecting. you imagine astarion's hand finding yours, lacing with it tenderly, squeezing it tight when it only wants to wrap around his throat. you imagine his voice, cooing comforting words that bleed into one another until they're unintelligible.
your heart skips when you picture a kiss. the softest press of his lips to yours — his palm on your cheek, your hands in his hair; your mind blissfully quiet, for a change. but the dream continues with none of those choices. astarion watches you embrace him, his arms wrapping around you in turn. now, it's his turn to feel his heart run wild.
instantly, you relax, and he senses your comfort; he feels soothed in exchange. you seem satisfied. as if you've finally received something you've wanted for a very, very long time. and you savor it. he savors it, letting every second feel like hours, exhaling a breath that shakes his chest because this hardly feels like a dream anymore.
you hug him tighter, and he holds you just the way you've wanted — just the way he's wanted. the remaining details go fuzzy around you. astarion feels you beside him, against him, within him. the warm hold of an embrace sears through his system, more divine than any prayer, softer than anything he thinks he's ever known. your mind is filled with a sense of understanding. an aurora of elation.
this is what I've needed, it whispers, glowing fondly, brightly. this is what we have both needed.
he hardly knows how long it lasts, just that it doesn't stop. he doesn't want it to stop. the dream only fades, vanishing slowly but surely, as darkness creeps in to devour you at last.
without thinking, without knowing or caring if his effort is worth a damn, astarion tries to push against it. he feels the sharp claws of dread begin to sink into you. a chill surges up his spine. his brows knit, as he adds an extra jolt of psionic power to your mind, attempting to fend off the torment for what only feels like a few moments more. in the end, your dream fizzles out hopelessly — and so does the connection.
astarion's eyes fly open. darkness greets him once more, his lonely tent suddenly all too quiet. slivers of moonlight shine onto him, the tent's curtain wavering in the wind. astarion exhales, he smiles. he presses both hands to his face in exasperation with a heavy, theatric groan.
even now, even as he lies alone and cold in his tent, his heart calming and his own perceptions returning, he still thinks he can feel the warmth of your embrace. it feels like burning. like light. like a fragile bloom of heat in his stomach, intense with so much tenderness it makes him feel sick. he's dizzy, just from the lingering ghost of palms pressed to his back. your hands, touching him soft enough to melt him, fond enough to brand new gentle marks onto his scarred skin. he hates it. he loathes and craves such a feeling, and he can't decide which sentiment is worse.
gods. who would've thought, for as drunk on violence as you are, you're truly so terribly, utterly soft.
frankly, darkness has always been an ambiance astarion is quite used to.
huffing, he wills his heart to shut up, and presses his fingers to his temple, massaging it to try and alleviate the strain left by the wriggling tadpole. he'll keep this event to himself, he wagers. mostly. in the back of his mind, the last few ripples of his severed connection to you still linger.
he swears, when you were drug from him, there was resistance. the resistance of trying and failing to drag him back, begging for someone to stay with you in the darkness. pleading don't go in the shape of his name, as your blood-sick head crumbled into nothing but aching, endless ash.
as he sits up, he hears the telltale pad of almost-silent footsteps — clumsier than usual, possibly from the grogginess. he hears you sigh, he imagines you rubbing your eyes and settling with staying awake for the rest of the night. it's better than letting your nightmares consume you. with a thump, a log of wood is tossed onto the campfire, making the flames burn brighter, and warmer.
astarion takes a second or two to think of what he should say to you. it isn't in his nature to hesitate, but it's also not like him to greet you with kindness, to suddenly ask if you slept alright, or if you'd like someone to keep you company. he should handle this delicately. maybe, you don't even need words. you just need for him to sit beside you for a while. to not bicker, for once. to just be. honestly, he would like that too.
before leaving his tent, he takes in one last deep breath, and mutters quietly to himself.
"you are just full of surprises."
#astarion warm up today because he's On my mind#he will be held tenderly in my arms#astarion x reader#astarion x tav#astarion
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su-su-su-supernova 🌠🎀
What's good is coming next?
I hope you enjoy the reading! for reflection. thank you 🌠🎀🌌
pile 1: hii pile number 1! all good? a moment of stagnation will be transformed. We see here movement in some area that was previously at a standstill, for your good, for your prosperity in an area. other people can also benefit positively from your prosperity, it could be your family, your friends, your partner, your community; with community work or something like that. We see here a movement towards your own prosperity, to fill your own cup, but it also seems that what comes next will also be very beneficial to others. How intriguing, isn't it? It may be your joy that radiates, because you will return to movement in something that was previously in stagnation, which may even leave you in distress previously, or with internal conflict. This joy that you radiate will be good for you and others around you. Amazing! Another case too, this area that was at a standstill, could actually have something in common with serving others too, it could be about spiritual gifts, working in care, treating people with love and kindness, etc.
In short, something will change, a positive movement in something, a snap, an inspiration, a change perhaps in your well-being, in your energy, which will become more positive. Therefore, you will be able to move something in your situation, in your environment and/or in your life that will be very, very beneficial. both for yourself and for others. Congratulations on this great news, pile number 1! Take good care of yourself, stay hydrated, get a good sleep, ask for help if necessary and you feel like it. thank you! 🌷💌
Cards: I forgot to write them, I apologize my pile number 1.
________
pile 2 - woah! pile 2! you probably went through a tower moment, something changed internally and/or externally. We see here that it is a positive change. With the Lovers Card and the 7 of Cups, you will have many options that will sharpen your eyes! I think there are a lot of love opportunities here, perhaps you are or will be arousing interest in several people and soon you will be able to choose. 👀 hmm, interesting.
Cards: the tower, the lovers, 7 of cups.
Anything else? Furthermore, your ideas and mind will be sharper during this period. allowing you more clarity and good ideas, good projects and also providing you with willpower, inner inspiration. Cards: page of wands, king of cups.
Advice: 10 of pentacles, wheel of fortune. truly accept past events in your life, past cycles. With the work of acceptance, your personal prosperity will flourish greatly. So, accepting and letting go really isn't easy, it can take time, practice - but it's something that can be learned, isn't it? Don't give up, good luck on your healing journey. Seek help and inspiration whenever you want. thank you! take care of yourself, pile number twoo. ❤🌷
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pile 3 - the sun! oh, finally. some weight will be left behind, recentness, hurt, something you've been waiting a long time to release. It's as if things finally fall into place with ease and a weight is lifted from your shoulders.
In the past, you may have had to choose between two things, with the two of pentacles. Your intuition guided you a lot on this path. I wanted to talk more about the positive things, but I was called to attention. Maybe it would be good for you to reflect on something, write about your feelings, your points that led you to the decision you are making/or made at that moment, if it's your case.
The oracle cards tell you:
love surrounds you. The Spirit is there for you.
There is also more advice from oracles, among them, avoid disorganization; If you feel that you are not capable of something or a mindset, improve yourself little by little and believe that part of you is already like that, the way you want to achieve it - and/or "fake it until you make it" kind of thinking if that is healthy for you and do you good in your situation.
Cheers, pile number 3! ☀☀☀ now is the time to feel loved, free, light and supported by the Universe. "Got your back!" ☀🌼🌱
________
#hope you enjoy :)#tarot community#pick a card#tarotblr#thank you#tarot reading#pick a pile#free tarot#pick a picture
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mfm threesome; unnamed third; MDNI 18+w/ BENEDICT BRIDGERTON
it took a lot for you to get benedict to focus on his own pleasure.
he had worried over you, staring up at you with big eyes and furrowed eyebrows. he knew what you could handle, he knew your signs of pleasure. but he thought that would change with the addition of someone else, one of his friends whose name you'd truthfully forgotten within the first press of a finger into your walls.
and having two people pleasure you did change your capability, but for the better. you took more than you thought you could. you reached your peak more often—and quicker—than ever before. benedict achieved his goal of making sure you were taken care of.
and now you wanted to make sure he was taken care of.
it took some coaxing, some convincing that indulging in his base pleasures wouldn't change your perception of him, but benedict started to lose himself. you watched him sink into the unfamiliar sensation of a man's lips against his coupled with your hands running along his shoulders and through his hair. you watched the way his eyes got glassy while you sunk onto his cock over and over again and the man passed his tongue and fingers over benedict's nipples.
and then you watched benedict's eyes settle on his cock when you wrapped your hand around him, followed by the other man's hand over yours. together, you two got benedict off, both taking turns drinking in the unabashed moans that flew out of benedict's mouth.
#been sitting on this for too long#stared at it too much#benedict bridgerton x reader#benedict bridgerton x you#celeste writes misc
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[ 📹 Insane scenes of contradictions as an Israeli occupation F-16 drops bombs on civilians in the city of Rafah, in the southern Gaza Strip, it is immediately followed by a second plane which air drops humanitarian aid for civilians being bombed to death. 📈 The death toll in Gaza rises again, now exceeding 36'379 Palestinians killed, while another 82'407 others have been wounded since Oct. 7th. ]
🇮🇱⚔️🇵🇸 🚀🏘️💥🚑 🚨
DAY 239 OF "ISRAEL'S" GENOCIDE IN GAZA: PALESTINIAN CHILD DIES OF STARVATION, ISRAELI OCCUPATION ARMY ADMITS 36 PALESTINIANS DIED IN THE CUSTODY OF OCCUPATION PRISONS SINCE OCT. 7TH, NETANYAHU SAYS NO CEASEFIRE UNTIL HAMAS IS DESTROYED, 70 BODIES RECOVERED FROM JABALIA CAMP, MASS MURDER ONGOING IN GAZA
On 239th day of the Israeli occupation's ongoing special genocide operation in the Gaza Strip, the Israeli occupation forces (IOF) committed a total of 5 new massacres of Palestinian families, resulting in the deaths of no less than 95 Palestinian civilians, mostly women and children, while another 350 others were wounded over the previous 24-hours.
It should be noted that as a result of the constant Israeli bombardment of Gaza's healthcare system, infrastructure, residential and commercial buildings, local paramedic and civil defense crews are unable to recover countless hundreds, even thousands, of victims who remain trapped under the rubble, or who's bodies remain strewn across the streets of Gaza.
This leaves the official death toll vastly undercounted, as Gaza's healthcare officials are unable to accurately tally those killed and maimed in this genocide, which must be kept in mind when considering the scale of the mass murder.
"Israel’s conditions for ending the war have not changed: The destruction of Hamas military and governing capabilities, the freeing of all hostages, and ensuring that Gaza no longer poses a threat to Israel."
Those are the words of Israeli occupation Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, who refuses to negotiate a ceasefire deal as long as Hamas retains the ability to govern the Gaza Strip and retains military capabilities.
“Israel will continue to insist these conditions are met before a permanent ceasefire is put in place. The notion that Israel will agree to a permanent ceasefire before these conditions are fulfilled is a non-starter,” Netanyahu added.
His comments come after US President Joe Biden gave a speech on Friday outlining terms submitted by the negotiators for the Israeli occupation in an attempt to pressure both sides into accepting the Israeli-proposed deal.
As negotiations have continued for months, Israeli negotiators have repeatedly put ideas on the table before the Prime Minister shelves the proposals with his comments, seeking instead the complete destruction of Hamas and Gaza, and using ongoing negotiations to buy time for continued ethnic cleansing operations in the Strip.
In other news, in an article published by the Associated Press, the Israeli military's medical corps told the AP's correspondant that "36 people from Gaza have died in Israel's detention centers since October 7th."
Of those, at least "some died from medical negligence," according to Physicians for Human Rights- Israel.
The Israeli occupation has detained some 4'000 Palestinians since October 7th, releasing roughly 1'500 after it was determined many of the detainees were not associated with Hamas or other Palestinian resistance factions.
Meanwhile, another Palestinian child has died of starvation as a result of the occupation's ongoing blockade of the Gaza Strip.
According to local reporting, a 13 year-old Palestinian child named Abdul Qader Al-Sarhi has died at Al-Aqsa Martyrs Hospital in Deir al-Balah, in the central Gaza Strip, due to malnutrition and dehydration.
The latest starvation death marks the 37th case of a Palestinian dying as a result of starvation and dehydration.
The healthcare situation in the Gaza Strip has become catastrophic over the last several weeks as the Israeli occupation forces closed the Rafah border crossing to humanitarian aid convoys, while at the same time, occupation bombing, shelling and ground operations have put all hospitals in the Rafah Governate out of service, and closed nearly all hospitals in the northern Gaza Strip as well.
Meanwhile in the north of Gaza, local Civil Defense crews announced the recovery of more than 70 decomposing corpses of Palestinians killed by the Israeli occupation army during its 20-day-long siege of the Jabalia Camp.
Civil Defense spokesperson, Mahmoud Basal, said in a statement that “Our crews recovered more than 70 martyrs, most of them women and children, from Jabalia camp," adding that "these include about 30 martyrs from the Asalia family alone, 22 of whom are children and women."
Basal continued by saying “Our crews have not finished their work yet in Jabalia, and are continuing to search for more martyrs under the rubble of destroyed homes.”
He went on to describe the Jabalia Camp as a "disaster area", resulting from occupation shelling, bombing, missile and drone strikes, and its purposeful burning of, and detonations of, local residential buildings.
“The occupation destroyed the infrastructure in Jabalia and its surroundings, as water, sewage, and electricity networks, schools, health facilities, and dozens of homes were destroyed," Basal continued, pointing out that “the occupation forces also destroyed the main electrical generators in Kamal Adwan Hospital in the northern Gaza Strip.”
Basal concluded by adding that “the occupation destroyed the fifth floor of Al Awda Hospital in Jabalia.”
At the same time, the Israeli occupation continues its invasion of Rafah, with Merkava tanks and other armored vehicles advancing into central Rafah where intense battles with the Palestinian resistance factions continue to rage, and as Israeli bombs and missiles continue to pummel residential buildings and local infrastructure, including healthcare infrastructure, wreaking havoc on the local population.
Occupation bombing, shelling and gunfire also continues in central and northern Gaza, continuing to target civilian housing and infrastructure.
IOF fighter jets conducted a firebelt today on the town of Beit Hanoun, in the northern Gaza Strip, while in Gaza City, occupation warplanes bombed a residential home belonging to the Al-Haddad family, on Al-Jalaa Street near the Al-Ghafri Junction, resulting in the deaths of three civilians, including journalist Ola Al-Dahdouh and wounding several others, including her husband and child.
In another airstrike, occupation forces bombed in the vicinity of the Salah al-Din Mosque, in the Al-Zaytoun neighborhood, southeast of Gaza City, killing three Palestinians and wounding several others who were taken to Al-Ahli Baptist Hospital in the city.
The Israeli occupation forces (IOF) also bombarded the vicinity of the University College, killing and wounding several Palestinians.
At the same time, in Gaza's south, Zionist occupation forces bombed several civilian residences in Sultan Hill, west of Rafah, including at least one inhabited home, resulting in a number of casualties.
Witnesses say occupation forces on the ground open fire on anyone or anything that moves in the residential neighborhoods of Rafah they occupy.
Another four civilians were killed near Lafat Badr, north of Rafah, after the Israeli occupation fired several artillery shells into the neighborhood, while occupation ground forces continue detonating homes in neighborhoods east of Rafah.
In central Gaza, Zionist warplanes bombed a residential house belonging to the Al-Sharif family in the Bureij Refugee Camp, along with bombing a second home in the camp, while the body of a civilian killed in occupation bombing was discovered near the sea in the Nuseirat Camp.
As a result of the Israeli occupation's ongoing special genocide operation in the Gaza Strip, the death toll among the local population has risen to exceed 36'379 Palestinians killed, including over 15'000 children and 10'000 women, while another 82'407 others have been wounded since the start of the current round of Zionist aggression, beginning with the events of October 7th, 2023.
June 1st, 2024.
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#gaza#gaza news#gaza war#war in gaza#genocide in gaza#israeli genocide#genocide#israel#israeli war crimes#israeli occupation forces#israeli occupation#occupation#war crimes#crimes against humanity#palestine#palestine news#palestinians#free palestine#israel palestine conflict#gaza conflict#middle east#politics#news#geopolitics#world news#global news#international news#war#breaking news#current events
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