#but right now i'm just so !!! fuck i'm everything ever
Text
an open fly walking
i didnt like this one but i thought id finally air it out since its been sat in my folders for months now
TG: hey karkat
CG: YEAH?
===
TG: you ever noticed you like
TG: walk weird
CG: WOW, OKAY.
CG: HAVE *YOU* EVER NOTICED THAT I DON'T GIVE A SHIT?
TG: pff
===
TG: no listen because i got my ears scoping that shit im like a scouter for dude activity
TG: ok maybe me mentioning it to you is gonna fuck up your ecosystem or something but
TG: you have the heaviest feet of the century man
CG: I DO???
TG: just thrust them straight down into the ground like youre trying to homebrew a san andreas fault
TG: viciously tamping on tectonic plates hoping for top score on the richter scale
TG: waging war against solid particles and the basic flow of gravity
TG: i could ID those footfalls out of a million i mean it
CG: SERIOUSLY?
===
TG: i mean theres nothing wrong with it but
TG: yeah
CG: I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW.
TG: im not fucking with you striders honor
TG: when have i ever lied to anybody about anything
CG: NOT UNPACKING THAT QUESTION WITH YOU TODAY.
CG: BUT SHIT, HOLD ON. LET ME SEE.
TG: yeah take the umbrella go over there and just walk to me
CG: ON IT.
===
===
TG: see you just kinda slam em straight down dude
CG: THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY RIOTOUS FUCKING JOKE OF A LIFE.
TG: dont your feet ache
===
CG: MOOT POINT. THIS MIGHT SOUND INSANE BUT I'VE ACTUALLY HAD MY STRUT PODS FOR A WHILE. ANY KIND OF PAIN THIS WOULD'VE BEEN CAUSING WOULD BE TOTALLY FILTERED OUT OF MY SPONGE BY NOW AS BACKGROUND NOISE.
TG: damn i didnt think that through
TG: my shades
CG: ALRIGHT, GET BACK UNDER THE SHITTING UMBRELLA AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME.
TG: look ive fucked myself over here too i dont have shit to clean these with
TG: ugh
===
TG: guess its karma
CG: HOLY FUCK. HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THIS BEFORE?
TG: i dunno but im gonna assume having a dad thats a literal crab monster is probably a contributing factor
TG: im guessing thats not a great role model for this kinda thing
TG: just conjecture i mean
CG: YOUR ENVY IS OVERWHELMINGLY OBVIOUS DAVE. AS A DISCLAIMER, HE WOULD'VE ABSOLUTELY KICKED YOUR ASS.
TG: yeah probably
CG: THAT'S PRETTY MUCH ALL THERE IS TO SAY ON THE MATTER.
===
TG: but see bro had me stringent on feather feets
TG: i bet i could slip across a bike horn warehouse with nary a fucking toot
CG: HAHA. ASSUMING YOU DON'T MAKE A TOTAL ASS OF YOURSELF, AS PER USUAL.
CG: IF YOU WEREN'T CONSTANTLY RUNNING YOUR GASH ABOUT EVERYTHING AND BEING AN INIMITABLE CLOWN I SERIOUSLY THINK YOU COULD BE ON PAR WITH YOUR CUSTODIAN.
CG: THAT IS A MONUMENTAL "IF".
TG: well look at it this way
TG: im basically doing you all a favor by being a dumbass
TG: never gonna get caught off guard by the bozo patrol
CG: WOW. GOOD POINT.
===
TG: also screw this can i use your shirt
TG: this stupid hoodie is just smudging my lenses up
TG: i cant see dick
CG: UH
CG: SURE, I GUESS.
TG: cool
===
TG: so yeah i could be prowling around like a goddamn verbal assassin sniping convos left and right
TG: but no ive got the decency to go bunp in the night
CG: YEAH.
CG: IT'S DEFINITELY COMPOUNDED BY THE CONSTANT INANE RAMBLINGS.
CG: BUT
CG: IT'S ACTUALLY PRETTY RELAXING, Y'KNOW? IT HAS ITS OWN RHYTHM.
TG: see yeah i sound it off and
===
TG: wait really?
CG: YEAH
CG: I DON'T KNOW
CG: FUCK. HOW DO I EXPLAIN THIS WITHOUT WANTING TO CRAM MY FROND DOWN MY PROTEIN CHUTE.
===
CG: IT'S LIKE
CG: A SALVE FOR MY AGGRAVATION SPONGE.
CG: YOUR VOICE IS THE HUMAN EQUIVALENT OF ASPIRIN.
TG: uh damn karkat hold your hoofbeasts i was talking about the rhythm thing
CG: ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT. I'M TAKING US BOTH THE FUCK OUT RIGHT NOW. YOU HAVE REACHED THE BAD END OF THIS CONVERSATION.
TG: you think thatd be heroic or just
CG: IF I WAS STILL GHOSTING AROUND THE RUINS OF SGRUB'S ARCANE FRIGGIN GAME SYSTEMS, THE COMPLETE LACK OF SHIT AFOOT NOWADAYS WOULD BORE ME TO DEATH.
CG: LIKE. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME OUR THERMAL HULL LEVELLED UP, DAVE?
TG: hah
===
TG: but uh
TG: i mean we had aspirin on earth
CG: NO, NUMBNUBS.
CG: I'M SAYING YOU ARE MY ASPIRIN.
TG: oh
CG: YEAH, TAKE THAT TO THE BANK AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR 20-KARAT ASS.
===
TG: heh
TG: well get this
TG: i will literally talk at you forever for free
TG: you got lifetime priority seating for the davealogues
TG: never gotta go to the drugstore again you can just get doped up on my dulcet tones for the rest of time
TG: take that and some of this
TG: im packin punches
CG: OW, FUCK! NO! MY MIGRAINES!
CG: SWEEPS OF VEINCLOTTING AND NERVEFRAYING DOWN THE FUCKING GAPER. BECAUSE OF YOU.
CG: YOU ASSHOLE, THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME.
CG: AND YOU'RE LAUGHING.
TG: chuckle up it only gets worse from here
===
CG: BE HONEST WITH ME. DID FONDLING MY SHIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET EVEN DO ANYTHING?
TG: barely but yknow sometimes you just gotta deal the cards youre given
TG: ill just be astigmatic for a while its cool
CG: PFF… OKAY MAN.
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Do-Over
It’s long past midnight, and Sherlock is far away from sleep. His nose hurts. His heart hurts. Everything hurts.
He’s too depressed even for the violin.
Short version, not dead.
How stupid can you be?
He’d hoped if he laughed it off, he could pretend it wasn’t a big deal. Could pretend his heart wasn’t breaking, seeing John with this woman.
Sherlock keeps a list, since that day on the roof of Barts. His worst mistakes. His biggest regrets. The top ten moments he would like to relive, to do everything differently.
Tonight has won the top spot. How cruel, how callous, how stupid, to make a joke of John’s grief, to make a trick out of something that should have been sincere, to laugh at pain, to mock when he should have begged. Forgive me, he should have said. I never meant to cause you so much pain.
He closes his eyes and wishes for oblivion.
There’s a knock on the door. Quiet, hesitant, but there.
Sherlock walks over, opens the door.
John stands there, looks at him. Mustache shaved, wearing that ugly coat and a devastated expression.
“I think we need a do-over,” he finally says, chin set in that way when he has when something hurts like fuck but he’s solidering through anyway.
“I’m sorry,” Sherlock whispers, barely audible, his heart beating a mile a minute. He better not fuck this up, because he’s pretty sure John won’t come back for take three of this particular conversation. “I did it to keep you safe. I know I hurt you by all the lying, but I absolutely believe that if I’d told you, you’d be dead right now.”
John looks at him for a long time in silence. His eyes are wet, and searching, and scared. He swallows, takes a deep breath. “My turn now. I wanted to tell you something. Before you jumped. And I swore to myself that if I ever had the chance, I wouldn’t chicken out again.”
Sherlock tilts his head in question, but says nothing, afraid that a loud word or the wrong move will scare away the boldness that’s come over both of them, the midnight courage of broken hearts.
“I—” John makes a frustrated noise when his voice gives out. He clears his throat, tries again. “I— you know what, fuck it.”
He fists his hand in Sherlock’s shirt front and pulls him in, pressing their lips together.
It hurts a bit because of the broken nose, but Sherlock still pulls John closer and kisses back with everything he has.
“Come home,” he whispers against John’s lips. “Please.”
John smiles into the kiss. “Yes.”
---
Let's be honest, if we could change one scene, it would be this one.
Also, periodic reminder that I'm collecting all of these here on AO3.
And since I can never resist a shameless self-plug, I wrote a fic that consists entirely of do-overs, it's called Empty Houses, and it fits this prompt so perfectly I could have just linked to it instead ;-)
@calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @jrow @peanitbear @jolieblack @meetinginsamarra @helloliriels @keirgreeneyes @lisbeth-kk @friday411 @givemesherbet-blog-blog @weeesi @thalialunacy @thegildedbee @dapetty @salmonsown
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Cremation is just another fun(erl) service
So blaming random 4am thoughts that have been plaguing me all day for this
----
Jason woke to a bright room, thin sheets and the smell of a hospital embedded in his body.
First as always, assess. Hospital. No affiliation printed on the walls or anywhere. Private room, but small. That door looked like it led to a private bathroom. Generic flower picture, a mounted screen turned off. Really fucking bright sunlight from the windows.
There was no fucking way he was in Gotham then. Everything was too nice. Normal by standards outside of Gotham. There were blinds, not metal shutters. The walls were cleaner than Gotham allowed outside of Downtown and he could see greenery through the window.
Okay. So what had he been doing? Jason remembered and then wished he had his Jerichos to shoot himself with. Mystic Shit™. Okay. Okay. That was not one of his better ideas, but if he's recovering in a hospital, it worked. World saved.
So recovery. How fucked was he?
His skin looked so fucked. Which meant he had been worse. He's had time to recover and lose muscle tone in, going by how twiggy his arms were. His hands looked good. Clearly someone knew he cared about those if they went through the effort of restoring those.
Hmm, that was odd. No matter how much Jason hated the Lazarus Pits and all its by-products, it would have been a faster and more simple way to recover from near-death than the long incarceration in a hospital for a John Doe.
Jason wasn't sure if he'd been abandoned yet again by those who called themselves his family because he could, "take care of himself," or if he had been written off dead. Again.
Hospital beat the coffin by a long shot.
And it was with that cheery thought, a nurse -obvious meta human nurse- came in and burst into excited Japanese, because that was of course, his luck.
It's after the nurse and doctors leave that Jason loses his shit.
It looks like he's sulking in bed, but mentally everything in his head is exploding. Imploding.
Three. Fucking. Years. Coma.
Burn victim so bad they not only expected him to die in the first couple of days, but still expect it because of the infection risk his fucked up skin represents.
Still the conversation with the medical staff -of varying degrees of bizarre- was enlightening.
No, he has no idea who he is. Did he ever get anyone visit? How did he get here?
Of course some amnesia is to be expected. No, some of the nurses visited. No one knows how he got here.
Does he know what his quirk is? Uh?
Trauma blocked amnesia, the doctor mutters.
What's the last date he remembered?
Saturday. Maybe? The last year? No, I'm pretty sure my memory is shit and I'm trying hard not to freak out over not knowing anything. So could I get the year number?
And then there's the fucking year number. Once he got it translated into more normal terms.
Mystic Shit™ said fuck you to the future.
Except Jason knows this is not his future. Again, if it was, this would have been treated as a fucking inconvenience. Effective skin restoration goop -the proper name escaped him- was easily available to those with the right connections. A normal baseline human with 2nd and 3rd degree burns would be fine in less than two weeks with it, with nary a trace to show for it.
Thanks to the three year coma, his muscles were all atrophied as fuck, despite their best attempts at physical therapy. Because of all the burns and later burn scars and infections making it basically impossible to actually do fuck all about maintaining muscle tone until he was basically burnt skin and bones anyway.
He was so fucking weak now. It wouldn't last forever. He'd escape this hospital before he was discharged, before whatever "benefactor" showed up for whatever "purpose," he was suppose to serve now, as they had the medical debt over his head or was threatening his loved ones or whatever. If one didn't show up in the next week, he was losing his genre-savviness, because shitheads always wanted to claim shit, if it looked useful.
And Jason was used to looking useful, until he was no longer useful and they just didn't care. The amnesia made him less shiny, but Jason couldn't pull off the brain dead zombie imitation without actually being a brain dead zombie crawling up out of his grave.
So under the thin hospital sheets, Jason twitched his muscles.
Two weeks of emotional freak outs, watching the news, physical therapy and drugs Jason had had enough.
And he broke out.
----
Yeah, he regretted it almost immediately. Hard not to in the stupid paper gown, barefoot and bare ass.
Thankfully people were people, even with the plethora of meta humans he had seen, so it actually wasn't hard to find clothes. Someone left a hoodie in their car and Jason broke into said car. Put on the hoodie. Hotwired the car and drove off.
Somehow for being in the fucking future by two centuries and change, cars really hadn't changed. More evidence of Mystic Shit™ slamming him sideways.
He drove to the next town over, picked another direction, drove some more. Parked the car near what looked like a chop shop, negotiated the car for some money. He probably got ripped off, but better than nothing.
He walked to a corner store, bought some flip-flops after bullshitting an excuse that his had broken. First aid stuff. You know, for his feet. Hair dye in three different colors, because Rose Wilson could pick out a bad dye job at a hundred meters and so Jason learned how to dye his own hair properly so as to avoid her mockery, only to get mockery (affectionate) anyway.
It was a mix of instinct and lifelong observation that let him find an empty apartment quickly. He stole some sweatpants and passed out on the bed.
----
The thing is, Jason doesn't regret his crimes like Bruce thinks he ought to do, with a massive pity party and flaming self-hatred and punching criminals instead of shooting them. He hates the necessity of doing crimes, even if that crime is a net gain to society, but that's why all his serious crimes are premeditated. He's homicidal, not a psychopath.
Not Pit-mad either, no matter what the rest of them might have thought.
Again, he's homicidal, not a psychopath. And when he doesn't have to be some sort of costume soldier to be discarded by family for the disgrace of disfiguring the memory of a dead boy? He's actually chill and boring.
That is to say, he crashed at that apartment for three days, felt progressively more like himself, especially after the dye job -white hair all over, now a solid and boring black- but it still didn't change all the other issues the Mystic Shit™ inflicted on him.
This body isn't actually his. Too young, scars not right where the burns didn't fuck him over. Thankfully his existing coping mechanisms for dysphoria work and it's shoved to the side.
It's also a shit body. Not even a month out of a three year coma with inadequate -by his standards- of medical care. It's weak and building muscle to do everyday civilian shit, is going to take months to do. Pushing as hard as he did during the escape wrecked him the next three days. Jason may not know what's going to happen, but with his luck, it's going to suck and training is preparing to make it suck less. The only certainty he's got is that his skin or lack thereof is going to kill him from infection if he doesn't fix it.
He's got no legal identity here. Which basically puts him back onto familiar ground of legally dead.
Beyond the lack of paperwork, he's got a lack of funds. He also has no easy target to steal funds and equipment from, even just for fun.
For more disadvantages, he's in a different country, with different laws and a whole different culture. He would be climbing on board a fucking plane to Gotham, if it existed in this world, for some familiar ground.
He really is the unluckiest Robin. It also means he is also the most prepared Robin.
---
The first six months after waking up in this mockery world of heroics were the absolute worst.
He started at one foot in the grave and crawled out of it before the casket could really eat him alive. Jason had experience in casket busting. He didn't wanna repeat it.
He still didn't know who he was -in who was he inhabiting- but it wasn't like Jason had a lot to go on. 'His' quirk was thermo-manipulation, most obviously in the blue fire he could call to his hands but he could do some ice too; it was thanks to Duke's light and shadow manipulation that he had even tried for the duality. He had white hair. Presumably Japanese heritage but quirks had really erased or blurred a lot of racial lines. Also presumed dead and young.
Access to the Quirk Registry took some doing, but again, not everyone followed basic computer security, much less what it took to keep someone bat-trained out of their systems. Again, for nearly two centuries in the future, a lot of the technological development had stagnated. Searching through the Quirk Registry hadn't yielded any result but none of his other methods had struck anything either. And he had looked at the recently dead and/or presumed dead. Sure, he had some leads that looked viable, but he wasn't going to follow those up yet.
He had fixed a few of his most pressing issues the past six months. His ignorance of the local area, the local and national politics and so on. This world supported and had an entire industry catering to making child soldiers and sell their image and reputation to make money and more child soldiers that called themselves Heroes.
His weak ass body no long cried doing daily tasks and only hated him after working out. Yes, Jason was pushing it but he was well aware of how months of preparation could mean shit in the face of seconds.
His infection risk was severely reduced after quick research bender let him make the most generic knock-off brand of the skin restoration goop in a shitty homemade lab. Did it fix his skin being patchwork fucked in places? Some. He wasn't going to get feeling back properly, but at least he looked more normal. Maybe with enough moisturizing he might look a little less Frankenstien's monster.
He also had a cash inflow. It wasn't great, but it supported his apartment. And the second set of papers. And the 2nd apartment.
Which meant in grand old tradition for Jason, time for him to bounce to the next apartment and come up with a new name.
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BULLET TRAIN (2022) PROMPTS
* assorted dialogue from the film, adjust as necessary
if you mention thomas the tank engine one more time, i'm gonna shoot you in the fucking face.
would you describe me as someone who lives in perpetual anxiety?
well, you also have a shoot-able face.
you never know what horrible fate your bad luck has saved you from.
thank you for taking the job on such short notice.
you are getting the new and improved me.
i'm less reactive to situations, i'm more accepting of people's shortcomings.
you put peace out in the world, you get peace back.
i'm not even trying to kill people and someone dies.
i could live here. i like the atmosphere, the people are considerate.
i know i'm being judgmental. i need to work on that.
this train is bound for kyoto.
i'm gonna assume you didn't take the gun?
you know, i'm thinking of starting my own agency.
what am i snatching and/or grabbing?
shit, i think i dropped my ticket.
you're bleeding.
who the fuck did i kill?
i think they'll notice the childish code names first.
when was the last time you ate a lemon meringue pie?
there's always a catch.
you idiots work for my father?
you ever watch thomas the tank engine? everything i learned about people i learned from thomas.
i want to strangle you now.
why do you always bring swords?
that wasn't our fault.
hey, listen, i'm just gonna get off at the next stop.
where's the briefcase?
he doesn't need a reason to kill people like you.
you're going to want to hear the whole story, or you'll be very, very sorry.
why do i even bother forwarding you the briefings?
no one really knows the truth.
we are... fucked.
find me the son of a bitch who did this.
can we just take a time out here? talk this out?
why does that sound so familiar?
the guy who stabbed me. i spilled wine on his suit.
one of them is walking towards me right now.
why are we whispering?
your orders were to stay on the train.
can i please do my job now?
shove that fucking hat up your fucking asshole.
there's a gun underneath this table pointed right at you.
i'm just fucking with you.
real quick... every day is a fucking headache with you, innit?
you're alive, i'm alive, everyone's happy.
i just want to get off this train, go see a zen garden and some shit, you know?
there's another body here.
this guy's like criss fucking angel. he pops up everywhere.
unlike you, i'm a professional.
you shoot first and come up with the answers later.
are you hiding in a bathroom?
i knew my luck would rub off on you.
you're really proud of yourself, aren't you?
for what it's worth, you seem like a right fucking asshole and i'm glad you're gonna fucking die with me.
you proved you're smarter than everyone.
am i dreaming?
i don't know how to use a gun.
i'm glad you enjoyed the performance.
i'm mansplaining. i'm mansplaining again.
you want a blanket? you want me to hold your hand?
you have been lying to me, my friend.
i never forget a face.
i'm so happy to see you. please help me.
make sure you do something that brings you peace, 'cause everything else is a pain in the ass.
fate for me is just another word for bad luck.
why are you motherfuckers using metaphors?
i'm gonna buy us some time.
i built myself up from the nothing you gave me.
i came here to kill you.
oh shit. something's happening.
i'm sorry i shot you twice.
we're almost there. you just need to get up.
what's happening to your face? are you crying?
#rp meme#mcflymemes#rp prompt#rp memes#roleplay memes#roleplay prompt#rp starters#ask meme#ask memes#roleplay meme#roleplay inbox prompts#rp inbox meme#inbox prompt#inbox meme#sentence starter#sentence starter prompt#sentence starters#bullet train
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Eunseok with a plus size reader😵💫 he just picks you up, has you sit on his face. And you know he loves riding cause he want to feel all your weight on him
Don't do that to me, I love him too much already 😭🩷
He's the one who asks you to sit on his face after he discovers it was possible to do that position, imagining every day the way his nose would swap right between your wet fools and drown him with your slick until he feels is the right time to ask you. You're not sure at first because you're so big and he so lean, what if you hurt him? And you don't have to say anything for him to understand the doubts forming in your head. "Don't you dare say you'll hurt me. I'm not that weak. if I'm working this hard is for a reason, and I won't let you undermine all my efforts like that." He'd say, taking off his shirt to show you how ready he is to be your seat.
"Eunseok, but-"
"No complaints," he stops you. "I can do it... let me show you I can."
You don't want to hurt his ego, he's been working so hard at the gym. You've seen him go even when he's tired from work, drinking protein like a mad man just to feel he deserves you. Also, you trust him, you want to trust him.
So, closing your eyes, you let him slide your underwear off your legs and guide you to his face.
You feel his breath fanning you from down there, and he's sick, inhaling your aroma like an addict man.
Nervous, you don't dare to put all your weight over his face, so he has to lock his arms on your thighs and pull you down to meet his mouth and feel your heaviness over him.
"Wait, wait!" You beg him because it's all so fucking intense. His tongue immediately has no mercy and laps as much as it can while his nose buries between your lips and brushes your clit every time he moves you over him.
It's a lot of work for him, using the strength he has gained those days, feeling happy that he's been adding weight to his barbell with the hope of being stronger than you. He already was, but it was easier now, and that's enough to make his cock jump inside his pants.
Soon you're doing it on your own, full of shame but feeling too good to care. Your movements are blunt, your mind is scattered all around, and you can't oblige your hips to follow a steady pace. Your body is doing whatever it wants, and Eunseok loves to see you finally free from your stupid restraints, hands going from your thighs to your ass, groping the plump skin to imagine you're using his cock just like you're using his face.
After all, everything he's ever wanted was for you to use him, it didn't matter if it hurt him, or if he didn't get touched, he just wanted to be there for you, ready to satisfy all your needs.
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claw at the world as it claws out your eyes
Riz takes a moment to try and recover from a frightening encounter in Leviathan.
title from Hawk In The Night by Madds Buckley
ao3
Riz sits on the counter of an excessively extravagant bathroom late into the night, feeling the sting of tattoos he doesn't remember getting, and the sting of tears at his eyes he continues to wipe away.
He doesn't feel safe.
It's expected as an adventurer, of course. Riz is used to that kind of danger.
But he doesn't feel safe as a goblin, either.
If people keep grabbing him and shoving guns in his mouth then that's bound to draw too much attention for the quest they're on.
He pulls the photo out and covers Kalina with one hand, just looking at his dad.
Riz blinks, and a tear falls onto the picture. One he's quick to wipe away, because it's not just a picture of his dad, it's evidence, it's a clue.
He wants to call his mom.
Had she ever been threatened like that? Riz wonders. He wants to call her and ask. But there's no service.
He wonders if it's ever happened to his dad, too.
But there's not a way to ask.
Not anymore.
Riz stifles a sob, puts the picture down and brings his hands to his eyes. It's been so many years. He grieved, he recovered, it's fine! It's fine.
It's fine, showing this piece of him—no, this piece of a puzzle—to strangers, because it's for the adventure. It's for a grade. It's fine.
A knock on the bathroom door causes him to flinch and yelp, before slapping his hands over his mouth.
"Riz? It's just me, Adaine. Can I come in?"
Riz reaches over from where he's seated on the counter and unlocks the door, wiping his tears away with his other hand.
She opens the door. "Hey."
"Hey," Riz says, mentally cursing the weakness in his voice.
She closes the door behind her, studying him with her gaze. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I—uh, sorry, did you need the bathroom?" Riz asks, and then he clears his throat to try and rid himself of the wobbles in his voice. "I can—I can go—"
"No, I just wanted to check on you," Adaine says, her sympathetic eyes locking with his, and they're so piercing he can't help but avert his gaze.
"I'm fine, I don't need checking in on," Riz says, still not looking up at her, and covering the photo with his palm. He doesn't know why.
Frankly, Riz doesn't know if he's fine. He should be, but his heartbeat is so fast and loud he can feel it throughout his entire body, and her words sound garbled and far away.
"It's just... well, there was that pirate who singled you out earlier, I just wanted to make sure you were okay."
"I'm fine, Fig and Kristen handled it, remember?" Riz says, looking up at her with a forced smile.
"Well, yeah, but I mean like, mentally. I don't know, with everything going on I just got a little worried," Adaine says, hopping up onto the counter to sit beside him.
Adaine summons her familiar, Boggy the Froggy, Riz remembers, and passes it to him.
He squeezes Boggy, and something about the comforting smile on Boggy's face and just how spherical Boggy is makes him start crying again, not bothering to cover it up.
Adaine hops off the counter and picks something up off the ground.
Ah, the photo.
She joins Riz on the counter again, still holding the photo in her hand. "Your dad does look a lot like you," she says.
And with that, Riz starts bawling.
And soon enough, he feels a hand on his back, rubbing circles in a soothing motion.
"I—I wish we had service," is the first thing Riz says, between gasps and sobs. "Sorry."
"You don't have to be."
Riz takes a deep breath in and a deep breath out in an attempt to... get away from whatever is happening right now. "I'm fine. It's nothing. God. Fuck," Riz says, burying his head in Boggy's body.
"We don't have to talk about it. I just want you to know I'm here, okay?"
Riz nods, and Adaine wraps him in a hug that he accepts but doesn't return, and eventually the tears subside, leaving only exhaustion.
"You feeling any better?"
"Mm," Riz nods. "Tha—thanks. Let's go to sleep."
#cookies writes and cookies wrongs#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhsy#fanfic#riz gukgak#adaine abernant#angst#hurt/comfort
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Will I Ever See You Again?
CHAPTER 4: Everything I Wanted
Author: orshii
Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x reader
Warning: cursing, violence
Word count: 4,4 k
Summary: You were left alone with your brother, Yunho, and his best friend Hongjoong, after your parents' death. Yunho had someone to grieve with, but you? You had no one as your brother and his best friend pushed you away, singing becoming your only savior. There was one rule that Yunho made inside his friend group: “Don’t touch my sister”. And for this reason, Hongjoong had always kept his distance. But one night, you find yourself in danger. And from then on, Hongjoong does not leave your side. He is suddenly overprotective of you, and your relationship shifts and becomes fraught with tension and unspoken feelings, with secrets lurking beneath the surface and a painful past haunting you. Will you find out the secrets your brother and best friend have been keeping away from you? Will you be able to finally free yourself from your cruel past?
Will you fall in love amidst the chaos around you?
A/N: This is my favorite chapter so far. A lot of actions happening so be ready. The truth unfolds. Please listen to this song, it plays an important role in the story. Enjoy, reading! (sorry for the late update, if anyone is still interested at all lmao). Byee!
(Series Masterlist)
Taglist: @bvidzsoo @vixensss @deltamoon666 @scarfac3 @chatsgotmytongue
@xiang-zalea @cookiesandcreammy (taglist is open)
I felt my heart in my throat as I listened to the loud bangs coming from the doorway.
I looked at Hongjoong, panicked. "What should we do now? We can't fight them."
He slowly faced me, stood in front of me, grabbed the sides of my upper arms, and leaned down to be at my height. "Listen very carefully!" His tone got lower. "You have to leave the house as soon as possible, Y/N!" His face went dark as I saw that some stupid plan was playing in his head.
"No fucking way I'm going to leave you here, Hongjoong!" I told him, looking into his eyes desperately.
"Sugar," he cupped my face. "I'm going to follow you as soon as I've won enough time for you to leave safely." He looked back at the door as the outsiders got more impatient.
I held his hands still holding my face. "No, Joong, we fight with them together, or we leave together. I'm not going to leave you here. Please, Hongjoong!" I started to sob as my voice got quieter.
"Fuck, Y/N, it's not the time to be stubborn." He stepped away from me, getting angrier. He went to the window to peek outside.
I stepped next to him, so I could see five men standing in the dark, shouting for us to let them inside. "You know you can't do anything against five men. Please think a little bit, Hongjoong." I reached my hand towards his upper arm, to make sure he knew I was by his side, not the enemy. "Look, if we sneak out through the backdoor that leads towards the ocean, I'm sure we can leave them behind and call for help." I had an idea as I tried to convince him to come with me.
He looked stressed as he ran his fingers through his messy hair, then brushed his palms against his face, trying to think clearly. "Okay, then I'm going to call Yunho to speak to the rest of the gang, and we're going to trap them." He looked around the living room, still thinking.
"Help me gather some things in front of the door. I have a feeling they're going to break it in no time." He went near the armchair, lifting it as if it were a feather. I quickly ran to the kitchen to grab the chairs, and we put anything we could in front of the door.
"That's it. Now run!" he suddenly said, grabbing my right hand and pulling me along with him.
I had no time to think as I just focused on not falling. We quickly escaped through the backdoor. The chilly air of the night hit me like a rumble of thunder; I was wearing one of Yunho's purple hoodies only. The moon was up in the sky, showing the way towards the ocean with its brightness as we were running in the moonlight. We climbed over the fence, just to arrive at the neighboring street. Hongjoong still held my hand and didn't let it go, not even for a second.
I think I might need to start jogging because recently, I've been running for my life every day, it's not even a joke. My breathing started to get heavy. I looked behind me quickly to make sure no one was following us. I started to slow down as I thought I might throw up at any second.
"Sugar, don't slow down, we need to reach the ocean." He looked back at me, holding my hand stronger, pulling me along. Two streets remained until we reached the coast. Suddenly, I felt the need to look back again, and when I did, I saw two black shadows far away running after us.
"They are—following—us," I said heavily, my breathing becoming more uncontrolled. This wasn't the time to panic, so I tried to gather myself.
Hongjoong looked back. "Okay, sugar, they aren't that close. Keep going, we're nearly there." He tried to motivate me.
The houses were slowly disappearing as the air got saltier, whispering danger. The scenery changed into a darker scene, the sun barely visible, and the golden hour disappeared just minutes ago. After running without stopping, we were near the ocean, and I started to hear the loud crashing of the waves against the cliff. It wasn't a normal coast; there wasn't any sand slipping through your fingers—the only thing that could slip through your fingers was your life, as these waves were killers, crashing you against the cliff with the power of a boxer's stroke, multiplied by ten.
We arrived at the edge of the cliff, my legs shaking. I didn't know how I was even able to stand still. I hunched over as something in my throat wanted to escape. I breathed heavily, feeling like I was on a roller coaster. Hongjoong did the same. He was trained, but this much running could defeat an athlete as well. The sound of the crashing waves never stopped, making an unnatural beat. I straightened up when I felt a little bit better and looked down at the ocean. Not much distance separated us from the ocean.
"How the hell did they find us, for fuck's sake?" I heard Hongjoong behind my back.
I was no longer there. I fucking lost my mind. I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe, as I was so sick of this, sick of the constant running. I couldn't do it anymore. My legs gave up as I fell to the ground, trying to breathe in some air, but it just couldn't reach my lungs. Hongjoong stepped next to me as soon as I fell, to grab me. I felt like I was in a never-ending dream, where I had everything, I wanted, but suddenly it turned into a nightmare.
"Hey, sugar, look at me!" He grabbed my wet cheeks, and I didn't even realize I was crying. "Look at me, please, Y/N, stay with me!" His voice was like the ocean, but softer, more concerned. He was blurry, as I didn't see him because of my tears, but I looked at him.
"Good girl, now I need you to breathe in and out slowly." I heard his voice from the distance; it felt like I was hearing that familiar melody I always heard in the back of my mind. I felt as if my body obeyed him. I inhaled as the salty air reached my lungs finally, spreading like veins, then I exhaled, finally letting out the stress I had been through, coming back to Hongjoong, to the real world, where we were at the edge of a cliff and some fuckers wanted us dead.
I reached my hand to Hongjoong's hand, which was still holding my head. "As long as I'm here, no one can hurt you, sugar, I promise." His face was full of something I didn't recognize; his words hugged me, keeping me alive with every second.
I nodded as he helped me up from the ground, some sanity coming back to my mind. I looked behind Hongjoong and saw two figures coming our way. They didn't even run, as we were trapped here like rabbits. Hongjoong took out his phone from his pocket and quickly typed something on it, then switched it off just to throw it on the ground.
"Now, listen to me, Y/N, you have to trust me. Do you trust me?" I shouldn't, why would I? But he wasn't the enemy; he only wanted to protect me. I nodded, words not coming out of my mouth.
"We need to jump—they think they trapped us, but I know this place like the back of my hand. When I was a kid, we jumped from here all the time, it's really not that bad." He grabbed my upper arms to look straight into my eyes.
I looked at him with wide eyes. "Are you kidding me? You ask me to jump straight into those killer waves?" My voice was weak, barely escaping my lips.
"I'm going to be there, next to you, Y/N. We don't have time. They are going to think we are dead. But trust me, please, with only this thing." He tried to convince me, his voice sounding weak just like mine.
"Fuck…" I looked behind him at the two evil shadows closing the distance between us, then back to the waves that lured me like they promised life to me. "Okay, fuck, let's do this," I said, running my fingers through my hair.
"I'm proud of you, sugar, we can do this." He wiped my cheeks with a careful touch, scared not to break me. "I'm right by your side, I'm not letting you go, okay?" His voice was so soft, he could've convinced me to burn the whole world; I would've done it in a second.
I just nodded. He reached his hands towards me, and I accepted them, interlocking our fingers, our hands becoming a padlock with no key. He slowly leaned towards my face and pecked my cheeks.
"Together, on three. Are you ready?" He looked at me, his eyes giving me the power to do this fucked up plan where we could easily die.
"Ready," I said, nodding my head.
Hongjoong looked behind him for the last time and shouted, "GOODBYE, FUCKERS!" and he lifted his free hand in the air, just to show them his middle finger.
I would've laughed at that, but I was so fucking stressed I couldn't think of anything else other than the fact that I'm going to jump into the ocean.
"Okay, sugar, remember, don't let my hand go. I'll be there to protect you." He looked at me for the last time.
"Three, two, one!" He shouted as he stepped towards the edge, pulling me with him into the crashing waves, looking at us like some monsters waiting for their food, open-mouthed. The seconds were longer than hours; everything felt slow, like in a movie. I felt like I left my body. I felt the air in my lungs leaving me and the only thing I could focus on was Hongjoong's hand, making sure I didn't lose it. I heard a loud crashing noise, feeling the icy water hit my body. I closed my eyes as I felt the salty water entering my lungs, almost like it whispered to me, “Welcome to your last journey.”
≫ I would sink with you until we reach the bottom
Not letting the monsters catch us above ≪
Darkness was surrounding me, my body was numb, I didn't know where I was exactly, was I dead or was I alive? I didn't know it anymore, as my lungs were full of something salty, I didn't recognize. It was hard to breathe because something heavy, pushed me down into the dark, not letting me go. Chains choked my neck and my wrists, it became one with my skin, locking me down. I just couldn't escape.
Dim light hit my eyes, but still, I didn't see anything. I felt like I was blind, I was still in the dark, not letting the lights in. I inhaled the air, which wasn't salty anymore. It was fresh and warm.
The music hit my ears and I started singing. That was the moment when I realized I was standing on the familiar stage, curious eyes watching me, waiting for me to let my voice out so it could slowly crawl into their ears, possessing their brain as if it was some kind of superpower of mine.
♪ I had a dream,
I got everything I wanted ♪
My voice was so far away from me, that I felt like I was still underwater. I felt like all of this was a dream.
♪ And if I'm being honest
It might've been a nightmare ♪
That turned into a nightmare.
♪ Thought I can fly
So, I stepped off the Golden ♪
Suddenly I felt, as if I was on the edge of the cliff, ready to fly straight into the crashing waves.
♪ But when I wake up, I see
You with me ♪
I saw Hongjoong next to me, when I stepped closer to the edge, I felt two hands pushing me down into the waves, sending me down, alone.
♪ And you say
"As long as I'm here, no one can hurt you
If I could change the way that you see yourself
You wouldn't wonder
"They don't deserve you" ♪
The familiar hands caught me, while falling, just to protect me from the waves, just so we fell into the ocean together. I felt safe around those arms, I felt like I was drowning but he still brought me back to life.
♪ I tried to scream
But my head was underwater
And it feels like yesterday was a year ago
But I don't wanna let anybody know ♪
Where was the reality? Where was the reality, where we escaped from the ocean, which felt like an eternity? I felt like we were locked down into the depth of the ocean forever.
In reality, it was only a few seconds as Hongjoong helped me out from the crashing waves, being the helping hand, that I needed my whole life.
Something changed there inside of me and nothing was the same anymore.
My eyes found him in the crowd, but I only saw him, everything was black, but he was shining. He was the light in my darkness. Just when we were in the ocean I opened my eyes for a moment, just to see him, holding me like his life depended on it.
I locked my eyes with him. He looked at me like I was the shining moon in the dark night.
♪ If I knew it all then, would I do it again?
Would I do it again? ♪
The melody ended, and I felt like my heart was pumping blood into my body fast, I was afraid I might explode. I wasn't myself; I couldn't recognize the strange people around me. I felt empty inside, my body was there, suddenly dancing in the crowd, I don't remember if I drank something, but probably I didn't have to, because I felt dizzy enough from this strange feeling that wasn't even a feeling. Something pushed my chest so hard; that I couldn't breathe. I felt strange hands around me, touching me. I wanted them to stop, but I couldn't let out my voice, it stuck halfway in my throat. I wanted to escape from there, but I was still in the dark.
I felt one, now familiar hand, grabbing my wrist. Two fiery eyes looked at me like they could burn me alive right there, I wouldn't even care. He dragged me along, through the moving bodies, through a door. Shining light hit me again, dragging me out from the dark, as we reached the bathroom. Hongjoong pushed me inside, letting my wrist go.
"Get the fuck out!" He shouted at the pair who were making out innocently in the bathroom. When they saw Hongjoong’s furious face they were running for their lives.
His furious voice brought me back to the real world all of a sudden, and I started to feel my surroundings, as the air got into my lungs finally. Chills ran through my body, and I started to feel the numbness escaping my body, as I was myself again. What the hell was happening to me?
Suddenly, I was standing in front of Hongjoong, trying to remember what happened in the last few hours, as I wasn't really myself from yesterday.
"What are you doing, Y/N?" Hongjoong's voice was dark, it sounded like he was furious and I didn't know the cause of it.
I stepped back a little, as he stepped towards me, we played this game until my back reached the cold wall of the bathroom.
"I'm not doing anything." I let my voice out finally, I felt like I hadn't been speaking for at least a year, and my voice came out weak and quiet.
"I saw as that fucker touched you and you let him? Are you really that desperate for attention?" His eyes were full of desire, with jealousy. He leaned closer to my face, his right hand on the wall next to my head.
My blood started to boil. Why was he acting like this? I was in a state where I just didn't understand anything at all and to be honest I didn't even care.
I looked at him furiously. "Why the fuck do you even care of what am I doing? You didn't even look at me since yesterday.” My voice came out unfazed. “I don't have the energy for this now, Hongjoong." I said, as I stepped out from his cage and went to open the door. But as I opened the door it was shot back right then, as I saw a hand on it pushing it back with a force.
"Don't you dare to run away from me, sugar!" He said stepping close to my back, whispering it into my neck.
I slowly turned around, looking at him sharply. "What if I am?" My voice came out a little teasingly.
He suddenly pushed me against the door by my neck, his hands around it like a chain.
"You can't run away; I won't let you." He leaned closer to my face, his hands tightening around my neck. It wasn't hurtful, he had got me in a chokehold but still, I felt like it was the most caring touch I have ever experienced.
I stayed quiet, I couldn't really say anything at all, because of his hands around my neck. My heart was racing quickly as I tried to breathe.
"I think about you all the fucking time, you drive me crazy, and I just can't watch standing still as someone else is touching you." He said with a tone I never heard from him, it whispered possession and safeness.
"Why?" This was the only word I could somehow push over my lips.
His hands got loose around my neck, as he slowly started caressing the two sides of my face. "Because you are mine, and mine only." His lips were almost touching mine as his voice came out so demanding I felt like I'm going to melt right into his hands.
I wanted to kiss him so badly, I felt like I couldn't breathe without him anymore. But I had one last question.
"Why are you doing all of this? This protective side of you and shit." I tried to explain my question as I wanted to know why was I this important to him.
"I promised your dad I'm going to protect you at all costs." His eyes were now on the wall next to me, he looked like some memories were playing in front of him. Some bad memories, because his eyes started to water.
"Hey, look at me." I cupped his face, lifting his head towards me to look into my eyes.
"What happened? Do you know something about my father's death?" I looked at him my eyes full of concern as I saw how suddenly Hongjoong got influenced by some memories.
"I—It's…yes." He looked into my eyes, but he seemed like he wasn't there, it felt like he was in a memory at this moment.
"Tell me Hongjoong, please. I don't fucking know a thing about how he died, about what happened. Does Yunho know?" My voice got weaker as I was on the verge of crying.
He just nodded. "We didn't tell you because we didn't want to put you in danger. All of this shit is dangerous, as your dad experienced it on his own. The gang, that attacked you two weeks ago killed your father." He was looking at me, trying to explain all the things that happened in the past. But as he said those words 'killed your father', everything went quiet for a moment, I thought I might die right there. Tears started to appear in my eyes.
He continued. "He was part of that criminal gang, it was a trader gang, still is, doing some illegal trading shit, with guns and even people. We didn't know how your father got into that gang, we only found it out the day when he died." Hongjoong's voice cracked a little, getting weaker and weaker. My breathing started to get quicker as I was listening to him.
"It was one morning when we were in the kitchen. You and Yunho were already in school, and I was alone with your father when suddenly some people broke into the house and kidnapped both of us. I didn't know what the hell was happening, and your dad said nothing at all, just to shut up.” His face looked full of emotions, as if he was back on that day, experiencing it again. “They took us somewhere, I don't know, it looked like an abandoned factory. They tied us to a chair. And suddenly they were arguing about some stolen money and a man who got saved by your father, so they couldn't trade him. I didn't really understand what was happening. They started to be rough, they threw your dad on the floor. I have only some memories about the whole thing..." He suddenly stopped; his eyes were as empty as a black hole. "...I—I saw as they—" His breathing started to quicken, tears rolling down his face. My heart was aching, seeing him like this, my tears blinding my eyes.
"Hey, hey, look at me, Hongjoong." I cupped his face, forcing him to look at me. Now it was my turn to help him out. "It's okay, it was a long time ago." I tried to bring him back here, into the present.
He grabbed my wrists, looking into my eyes with so much guilt, that his eyes were screaming at me. "I— couldn't do anything, Y/N—they killed him right there…and I couldn't do anything at all." He started to sob, hiding his face in my neck. "His last words were to protect you no matter what. And I promised—I promised I'd never let anything happen to you." He mumbled into my neck, his voice barely recognizable. I was frozen; I couldn't perceive what he just said. Suddenly I didn't know where I was. I only felt Hongjoong against me, as he let his heart out, confessing his sins to me, without fear. The fact that my father was killed also killed half of my heart, leaving emptiness on that side. And the fact that Hongjoong saw it all and blamed himself killed the other half of my heart, leaving me heartless as my thoughts flew at me like furious birds, killing every part of me.
I was suddenly a bird in a cage, not even wanting to leave the emptiness.
My subconscious reached for my hands to bury them in Hongjoong's black and blonde hair. Trying to calm him down, as I couldn't even calm myself. "It's okay, Joong. It's not your fault." I said quietly.
He slowly lifted his head and looked at me with red eyes, tears still on his face. "We tried—alongside Yunho, we tried to get revenge for him. We entered that gang with pen names so they didn't know who we were. They didn't recognize me, as I bleached my hair like this back then. At first, the plan was working really well, they didn't know who we were. Then somehow, they found out, and that's when they started to attack you and us too." He looked down at the floor, looking guilty, looking like he already accepted his fate.
I slowly buried my face in my palms, as I needed to process all the things he said. This was fucked up; the whole situation was so fucked up, I didn't know what to do.
"You knew… you knew the whole time how my father died and you didn't tell me…" I said as little tears rolled down my face, without my knowing. "Yunho pretended he didn't know it, he lied to my fucking face, kept me like a bird in a cage…" I didn't feel anything at this point, I never felt this heartbroken. My chest was hurting, I felt like my heart was burning at that moment, leaving only ashes behind.
Hongjoong looked at me with wide eyes, trying to say something, but words didn't come out. "I could've helped if I knew…We could've avenged him, together. But I was a fucking princess closed in a tower that had no exit, Hongjoong. I lost all of my feelings." I was crying now, tears rolling down my face like a waterfall. "You two were there for each other, but who was there for me? Huh? No one." I was angry at him, at Yunho, at myself for letting my anger off on Hongjoong. "Yunho got into this shit because of you." I pointed at him, losing all of my sanity. He couldn't say anything as his face told me too many things. Disappointment, sadness, guilt, regret. Anger took me over, so I said some things I didn't mean at all. "My father died because of you, Hongjoong." That was the stupidest sentence that had ever escaped my mouth, but I said it, and there was no turning back, as Hongjoong's face returned to its emotionless position, where I just couldn't read anything.
I couldn’t look at him anymore, as I turned over, opening the door. I wanted to disappear from there, I didn't want to be near him. I just wanted to disappear from the world. As I realized what I had said to him, my heart was clenching, and I felt shame crawling into my heart, not wanting to leave it. I went out into the dark, chilly night, I just wanted to clear my head, and the only solution was to go as far as possible from here. I sat in my car, turned on the engine, and drove away from this shitty town, running away from my problems, as this was the easiest thing to do.
≫ The red string connecting us now bleeds,
Leaving drops of blood behind,
Showing the way towards me ≪
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#orshii#kim hongjoong#kim hongjoong x reader#hongjoong x reader#hongjoong ateez#kim hongjoong ateez#hongjoong fluff#kim hongjoong fluff#kim hongjoong angst#hongjoong angst#kim hongjoong smut#hongjoong smut#ateez series#ateez fluff#ateez angst#ateez smut#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#ateez x reader#ateez x female reader#hongjoong scenarios#kim hongjoong scenarios#ateez fanfic#boxer hongjoong#park seonghwa#jeong yunho#kang yeosang#song mingi#choi san#jung wooyoung
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So I just started playing In Stars and Time because I got curious about the sad little blorbo you occasionally post about and afshdjdkrn
I just. Wanna hug them. So badly 😭
Siffrin isat my everything my cinnamon fucking apple WKDNWKDNEKEKSK HE IS SOOOOO SQUISHABLE...... THEY NEED A HUG SO BAD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
Incredibly pleased im helping spread the isat propaganda like the dev rlly just Made a whump fic in video game format huh....... for tumblr girlies by a tumblr girlie.... my gods we respect the grind as if i could EVER be normal abt that
I'll be so real ive already written little tidbits for a longer au oneshot i want to write in between chapters of hunger au, and the exercise in 2nd person pov is SO MUCH FUN im enjoying myself immensely :] here, a snippet for both fun and profit (and more fun):
"Siffrin...." Odile says, and it strikes a sour chord, a ripple of dissonance that screws rivets around your chest and tightens. She shouldn't have to say your name like that, with that kind of weight— as if all the Craft in the world isn't enough to carry it. Pure reflex ducks your chin into the collar of your cloak; you avert your gaze back to the rubble-littered floor of the tunnel, tracing dark crags in the stone where sputtering torchlight fails to reach.
There you go again, stardust. Loop's voice is an ephemeral echo in your ears, a byproduct of months, years worth of past loops gone by. It isn't real. Gone and made yourself another person's problem.
It isn't real.
"— need you to start taking this more seriously." Odile bites out each word with the same deportment of a dog tearing off chunks of meat, clipped and cutting. Her brows knit together, mouth pulling down in a sharp curve; the lines around her eyes are tight, carved from the knife's edge of her own disappointment.
Her disappointment in you.
You almost miss the next sentence as well. "I have no way of helping you if you don't speak to me," she says. "And when you minimize these things you went through— you realize that's going back on your word, yes? Gems alive, Siffrin. We want to help."
You speak before your mind has caught up with your mouth, hundreds of loops sanding down the words into something practiced, rote. "But there's nothing to help me w—"
"Stop lying to me." Odile snaps, and your jaw shuts so fast you miss biting your tongue by a mere hair's-breadth. Your lungs threaten to buckle— inhale. Exhale. Come on, stardust, Loop's imaginary voice sneers, can't you do something as simple as breathe? Or are you just that blinding useless?
... Shut up.
Odile's eyes slip shut. She raises a hand to meet them, kneading at the soft skin between her brows. "I'm... sorry, Siffrin," she says, halting, stilted. "I shouldn't— that wasn't productive. I apologize."
Tentatively, you say: "You don't have to."
"Yes, I do." Odile straightens once again, tucking a strand of sweat-slicked hair back behind her ear with a grimace. "It's not... conversations like these are... hard. Yelling is pointless for both of us. I'm sorry."
"But you didn't—"
"Siffrin," she says, and this time the syllables of your name twist, a rise and fall that cracks wryly in the middle. One sharp eyebrow arches up into the canopy of her hairline. "You're supposed to say you accept the apology."
You stare. She stares right back.
Oh. She's serious.
"I..." you look down. "Um. Accept?"
"Excellent," Odile says brusquely, and bends to peer at an invisible speck of dirt clinging to her forearm. She brushes at it with absent, studious flicks, the epitome of single-minded focus. "Then now we can move on with our lives."
#shouting speaks#asks#isat#isat siffrin#siffrin#odile#isat odile#isat spoilers#SORT OF. I DONT THINK THEYRE EGREGIOUS BUT IM TAGGING JUST IN CASE#isat fic#yuor honor. im kinda insane abt the odile and siffrin relationship i wont lie#they are SOOOOOO.. THEY JUST DO COCOMELON SHIT TO MY HEAD OKAY I ADORE THEM#love meemaw's pride issues quite frankly. odile i love u..... i love how ur so bad at emotions but my gods u try#i could go on and on abt how i think she feels incredibly responsible for what happens to the party#if i get my way this fic is gonna be like a 20k character and relationship study between the two of them SJDBSJDNJSDJDJ#my snippets#txt
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Late Night with the Radio Demon - The Deal
Tagging @hiemaldesirae as promised :)
Vincent and Alastor hash out their deal.
Vincent is still sitting on the floor of his destroyed apartment, staring up at the strange looking deer man above him.
He is the Radio Demon and he wants to make a deal.
"It's quite simple, really! Quite simple!" he crooned, unsettling smile too wide. "You do some favors for me, and I'll use my power to guarantee your success!"
It did seem simple enough...too simple. Vincent had been in the television industry long enough to know that nothing was ever so easy. All around them, the shadows writhed and twisted as though alive. A thin tendril slithered over his hand and he quickly snatched it away, heart threatening to break free from his ribcage. Slowly, the TV host got to his feet, making sure to keep some distance between himself and the demon.
"I can give you everything your little heart desires!" the Radio Demon continued. "All I need from you is a little cooperation."
"Why?" Ah yes, let us question the all-powerful eldritch demon standing in our living room. That can only go well. "Why are you interested in helping me?"
Wait.
Was he seriously considering this?
It was insanity at its finest. Making a deal with a demon. A very real fucking demon. But what were his options, really? He was expected to double his ratings by the end of the month. Yes, his show was steadily climbing in popularity, but such a jump would be impossible. Impossible...without a little help. Fuck, he really was considering this.
"For the entertainment, of course!" the demon cackled. "Of course it would just be bad business to not require some form of payment for my services, but truly my interest lies in the entertainment of humanity and its pathetic, desperate attempts at improvement! Laughable, really, but so amusing to watch them try!" He extended a hand, bowing forward. "So do we have a deal?"
Vincent swallowed, physically restraining his own hand from grasping the demon's. "Not yet." He struggled to keep his voice even. Inky black tendrils hovered around him like curious snakes. "These...favors...they can't interfere with my success...and...I only owe you one a day."
The demon blinked and Vincent felt his throat tighten. Aaaaaand this is where I die, he thought.
The Radio Demon's ever-present smile seemed to stretch beyond the limits of his face, eyes alighting in hardly contained glee.
"Ǒ̷̱h̵͙͝ ̷͔͊y̴̰͐ë̸̜́s̷̹͛," he hissed through the tinny static that reverberated through his voice. "Ì̶̳ ̴̻̌t̷̠̄h̸̜̿î̸̩n̵̦̂k̵͉̔ ̵̼̈́y̷͈̑ô̸̩ű̸̞ ̸̣̀w̵̞̐ỉ̸͍l̶̗͋ľ̵̨ ̸͚͆p̷͙̃ṟ̷̍o̶̐ͅv̶̻̓ě̸̳ ̴̺̉t̷̮͠ǫ̴́ ̶͈̌b̵̓͜e̷͓͐ ̶͝ͅq̶̣̑u̷̞̾ḯ̴̩ẗ̴͇́e̵̓ͅ ̸̲͋e̵̜̿n̶̩̒t̷̲̿e̵̦̾r̸̟̐t̶̜͆a̴͓͒ĩ̷̡n̵̻͑i̴̩̎ṋ̸͌g̸̤͂ ̶̱̀ĩ̴̱ņ̷͘d̴̨̓e̶̳͠è̷̖d̴͙̃." He pulled his hand back. "Not unreasonable requests, my dear, not unreasonable at all. However, in light of your...additions, I'm inclined to offer my own caveats as well." He twirled his cane (microphone?) and rested both hands on top of it, meeting Vincent's eyes. "If you at any point refuse my daily requested favor, I get your soul."
A chill rushed through the TV host. "My soul?"
The Radio Demon only nodded. "Only if you outright refuse, of course. Questions and comments are permitted."
Okay. Okay, that was easy enough. Just don't refuse. The demon couldn't ask for anything that would get in the way of his success so that should have ruled out quite a lot of dangerous options.
"Okay, but...you can't ask me for anything impossible...or to knowingly harm myself in any way."
The demon looked delighted. "My, my. Covering your bases, I see."
"I've been in this business long enough to know what a good contract looks like."
The deer man hummed. "I must admit, you're being far more forward than most that I've dealt with. It's quite a pleasant change of pace."
Vincent tried to not to preen at the praise. No time for that right now. Keep your head screwed on.
A clawed hand extended towards him expectantly.
Vincent took it.
The reaction was instantaneous. The room lit up in blacks and bright greens. The tendrils thrashed and encircled them. The Radio Demon's maw stretched to impossible lengths and suddenly that creature was back again. The one that had dragged itself free from the void of the radio. The demon's hand was massive around Vincent's own pale one, the deer man towering over him with that same unsettling grin plastered to his features. For a moment, Vincent was utterly sure he'd made some mistake. The Radio Demon would kill him now and that would be the end of everything. Someone would eventually find his mutilated corpse...if there was anything left of it.
Then green chains burst forth from the shadows, wrapping around their hands and up their arms and binding them together. He could feel the burn of them through the fabric of his jacket and he couldn't stop himself from crying out at the pain. The room was spinning. He was going to be sick.
It burned.
It burned.
It burned.
Slowly, the magic ebbed away, leaving Vincent dizzy and disoriented, the hand around his own being the only thing keeping him upright. With a flourishing little spin, the Radio Demon sent him stumbling backwards to sit on the couch. Pain lanced up his arm when he landed and Vincent scrambled, wrenching off his jacket and yanking up his sleeve. There was no sign of damage, no burns or anything that could have caused such agonizing pain. All that remained of it now was a dull ache that permeated down to his bones. The deer man chuckled.
"Ah, the first time is always quite the thrill, hmm? You didn't faint, though! That's an accomplishment!"
Vincent didn't want to admit just how close he had come to doing just that.
"So..." He swallowed. "What happens now?"
The Radio Demon tucked his hands behind his back. "Well, my dear, now I get to work and I believe you owe me today's favor."
Fuck, they were already starting? That...well, that did make sense, but somehow Vincent thought he might have a little more time to process the whole thing.
The demon snickered. "Tell you what. I'll give you an easy one to start. Something to get your feet wet. A dear friend of mine is quite partial to these...I believe she called them Bittenbab Cakes?"
"Battenberg?" Vincent asked.
The demon brightened. "That's it! Anyhow, she does love them dearly, but they're rather hard to come across in Hell, if you can imagine. Get a few nice ones for her, would you? She'd be ever so delighted."
Instantly, Vincent felt a sharp tug in his chest and something akin to static rush over his skin. The deal...it had to be. The demon had made his official request.
"Uh...yeah, sure, no problem. Um...how do I-"
"I'll be by tomorrow around the same time to retrieve them. Leave such arrangements to me, darling." He traced a claw along the edge of his cane. "But I suggest getting some rest for the night." Fuck, when had it gotten so late? "You do seem a bit winded, my dear."
"I'm fine," Vincent insisted, trying to sit up and immediately regretting it when the world twisted before his eyes.
"I'm sure." An amused smile crossed the demon's face. At least, Vincent thought he was amused. It was kind of hard to tell when the deer man never stopped smiling. The demon closed what little distance there was between them and took Vincent's hand in his own, pressing a kiss to his knuckles.
"I'll be seeing you tomorrow then, darling."
And then he was gone.
It was like he had never been there. Even the room was spotless, the evidence of the TV host's tantrum swept away. The only evidence anything had happened was the small radio sitting innocently on the coffee table and the tingling in the back of his hand where thin lips veiling razor sharp teeth had pressed against his flesh. Vincent leaned back into the couch.
The Radio Demon.
What the fuck did I just get myself into?
#late night with the radio demon au#hazbin hotel#hazbin vox#hazbin alastor#radiostatic#alastor the radio demon#vox the tv demon#hazbin hotel au#human vox
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not to be true crime posting on main but i think i'm falling down the wm3 rabbit hole again
#xenia.txt#when i tell you this case keeps me up at night to this day#not even the murders themselves as much as the general public's reception to and opinions on the case 3 decades later like#i get why it;s always been so divisive especially after the pl docus came out (lots of opinions on those btw none of them are good#from the bottom of my heart fuck you joe berlinger and bruce sinofsky)#but it's truly baffling how no one is willing to do the research on what is arguably THE most well documented true crime case in recent#history like. everything that's ever been released to the general public is available online and i mean everything#you can find all the court files trial transcripts depositions interogation tapes aerial photos you name it it's out there for anyone with#internet connection to access at any and all hours of the day#and yet people are still foaming at the mouth fighting on reddit abt their innocence based off nothing but a couple of movies like#bffr with me right now!! almost every point the innocenters make can be easily debunked by scrolling through callahan for 15 minutes#'but they've been pushing for dna testing since their release so they can't be guilty' baby the case is closed!#it's been closed the second they took the plea. they can be striking under that courthouse and it still won't change a thing and they knowi#that's why they're pushing for it in the first place but that's just my opinion#^ and i say they but it's really only echols which makes a lot of sense to me personally#and if you want to talk abt dna testing let's talk abt the one that was done in 2011 and how the defense hurried to propose the plea as soo#as they got the results! let's talk abt those cause no one's ever seen them and i would very much like to#braga share the results the people want to know!!#makes me wonder which pieces of evidence they even submitted for that 2011 testing because if i'm remembering correctly#there was one that would've closed this case instantly and maybe that's why the results were never disclosed and the plea was rushed#but that's also just my opinion#and it's also interesting how the majority of people who have in fact deep dived into this case#(and i'm not talking abt big true crime youtubers as i'm very sceptical abt their research abilities)#all collectively lean towards guilty. much to think about#i was hoping someone would make another ~actually~ unbiased documentary for the 30th anniversary and go over all the case files#but i don't think that's even realistic at this point seeing as everyone and their mother has some sort of an opinion on this case#hbo deserves another lawsuit for this. they should've never won the first one in the first place#true crime tw
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in such a kiss everyone on the lips and cradle them gently sort of a mood
#im so sorry for going on#it's just such a win#it's an ending to the year that i could never have predicted#i really Really didn't think i was making it out of april i really didn't#and i know i've gone on but i was so sure i'd die with so much unfinished and incomplete#by the Bad Day all i was really thinking about was waking up the next morning and yelling i love you at everyone i've ever loved#but before that it was the fear and the sense of loss for what i never did or had or whatever#to be where i am right now? to have had a day like today?#it's beyond anything i could have ever hoped for#i don't know when my health will turn again. or how this cancer thing or tachycardia thing will play out#but right now i'm just so !!! fuck i'm everything ever#i'm so intensely happy#and fuck- a glass of orange juice makes me happy#so this is#just wonderful#it means i can afford to do a masters. and have the time- probably- to do it part time#it's beyond a gift#i'm so fucking happy#so happy to be here for it
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sometimes allistic people are so weird, someone at this clinic set up four health appointments for me and i have literally no idea what any single one of those appointments are going to be for. the clinic just. set them up, and i'm just gonna... show up to them, i guess.
so now i'm going to show up to an appointment and idek what i'm supposed to expect because there's literally no information? is this a psych assessment? is it a space for me to ask questions? should i treat this as a job interview? are they going to eventually ask me to meet them on the interstate after dark and mug me? idk!
this is mostly a joke post, but things could be made more accessible to autistic people by just giving a LITTLE bit of information on what something's going to be?
like what are you going to do at my MRI, what are you going to do at my first physio appointment? What's going to happen at this queer meetup? i don't fucking know, ever because you weird little allistic guys all just run blindly into anything, apparently, like a domestic animal released into the wild.
you don't know if you're gonna be there 3 hours or 3 weeks, how do you guys know you even brought what you need to survive? there's never any fucking instructions?
#i often think it's neutrotypicals with the weird fucking brains and not us#you guys waste SOOOOO much time talking about absolutely nothing so that you can get to know someone before becoming friends#but everything else requires absolutely no instructions or like toe-dipping? you just leap right into that stuff#what is it about other people that scares you so bad that you have to spent months small-talking with them before you can be friends#and yet you just walk into completely foreign situations with absoutely no prep or instructions#like don't you guys ever wonder like... what's going on?#what are you guys doing???#please actually someone talk to me about this i am genuinely asking#so much of the time when i ask allistic people why they do things they genuinely have no idea why they do them that way and i'm like???#''don't you see how this is actually detrimental/inefficient'' and you're like ''i guess'' and then you KEEP DOING IT ANYWAY?#like who's got the rigid thinking now llolol#tbh i think we all have disordered thinking it's just that neurotypicals think they're normal because they're ''the majority'' (for now)#for now#liminal scrawlings#actually autistic
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.
#i wish i could just [redacted]#like i'm genuinely so exhausted. there is no point to anything anymore#i can choose between constant endless suffering or [redacted]#so the second thing is sounding pretty fucking good right now and honestly every single day of my life since i was about 11#its fun that literally nothing helps and i only get worse. yay!#its fun that asking for help is pointless. yay!#its fun that those two prev tags apply to multiple areas of my life. yay!#its fun that no one wants to help anyway. yay!#its fun that no one gives a shit about me unless they're getting something out of it. yay!#its fun that i have no choice but to be completely broken because every attempt to heal is met with more trauma. yay!#its fun that i wasted most of my life with people who would genuinely sell me for a corn chip. yay!#its fun that i have given everything i have over and over again because i never learn and nothing is ever good enough for anyone. yay!#its fun its really really fun i hope i can stay in this world for ever and ever wow wow wow!!!#negative
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The whole "if a person is mad at you it's their responsibility to tell you" thing just made me realize how fucked my situation is. Like just. woah
#who wants to hesr the story of how I lost my irl friends recently (you will I'm spitting everything right now)#anyway so last year one day one of my friends decided to randomly backstab me and she started talking behind my back#and yeah this all made me mad because?? what the fuck#she started talking and revealing stuff that i had confide to her to other people and they slowly started drifting from me#BUt the thing here is that she was manipulating the story. she changed it every time she told stuff to people to make me look bad#i heard one of the things she said about me once and i was like ?? she even make me dislike me in her version which like woa#anyway I didn't understand why she did that because it was ? so random? and then she started ignoring me and has not talked to me ever since#the thing is. she apparently didn't have enough with just doing that. she slowly started to rot my other friends' brains too?#in the sense that. suddenly the rest of my group was ignoring me too. they never said anything to me. or stated that they had a problem#they just ignored me in my face? and yeah that. hurt#recently i found thanks to a third party that one of them decided to stop talking to me because apparently i had hurt her uncountable times#and she was just soo sick and tired of me doing that. which. honestly made me mad because she did not ever express that to me?? so#what was i supposed to do. if she never said anything.#anyway one of my friends confronted her about the treatment they were giving to me. the whole exclusion thing. and her answer was-#”well it's not my fault that she doesn't have more friends and doesn't talk to people”#and i was like. woah. what a poor reply. is that really it.. also apparently they all had agree to stop talking to me as a group-#-and they never informed me so. thank you?#and I'm still here asking what i did to that ex friend of mine. later on i found out she had hooked up with the guy i used to like btw#and she kept it secret. oh and then i started dating my current partner ! person she also felt attracted to. and that's my only explanation.#she started gossiping after what happened with the first guy. so that's really everything that comes to mind as a reason#ANYWAY now that i was at the hospital i didn't receive a single text from any of them. so i guess that was it. people who don't care-#-like that are not friends. those people are not my friends. people who ignore me on purpose and gossip like that are not. my friends#so yeah that's why I've been feeling down lately but ! here I am i ended up ranting so. much#rant#vent#?#woah i actually feel so much better after spitting it all#I'm also following that sour grape advice btw I'm not giving them the privilege of cutting me out. I'M the one who dislikes them now
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Self-indulgent OC moments, but Wyll would be so disappointed to actually meet Gorion's Ward in my Realms. Never meet your heroes, I guess.
It's kind of like if you took the basics of Gortash and Ascended Astarion and distilled them into a 2'11" lesbian hellbent on controlling the world so it can't hurt her anymore, who also thinks failing to return library books should be a criminal offense... I mean as a character she predates them by a decade, but eh.
#On that note have I ever mentioned how INFURIATING it is that BG1+2 don't acknowledge that you're hin in conversations with other hin?#And just because she handles PR better than Bhaal as a death god doesn't mean she's a nice person#She was tyrant of the library as a child. It got worse.#“Everything has its place and function; when things are out of order they don't function smooth- put that book on the right shelf or die."#And then it turned out that the world outside was in fucking shambles and the gods are incompotent and it was like:#“OK so I'm the only competent person on Toril and I need to take control now.”#babbling#OCs#Solath
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CLETHO ENJOYERS HOW WE FEELING???????????!!!!!??!!??!!!!!!!
#secret life#secret life spoilers#secret life smp#secret life smp spoilers#cletho#captain's chatter#just tagging EVERYTHING to absolutely cover my bases#but holy shit holy shit this new series. I'm losing it. I'm losing it#I've been manifesting cletho teamup for MONTHS like SINCE LIML I've been wanting it and I WIN!!!!!!!!!!!#FUCK it's gonna be so good#it's gonna be SO SO good and also we got tangleo ish things which is more minor for me but I love to see it#also gonna make a post about how I'll be tagging spoilers right after this but I wanted to make sure it'd be above yknow :thumbsup:#anyways. the mental illness is so real and every symptom is happening at once#but I watched cleo's ep and now I'm gonna watch etho's and then just like everyone else ever
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