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One of the hardest things I've had to realise about shifting is that non-shifters don't see infinite possibilites the way that shifters do. They truly believe that this is their only life, their only chance, and that they can't live their wildest dreams. It's so heartbreaking to here the way my friends and family speak about life sometimes.
#they do not have childish wimsy i fear#but actua#shifting diary#shiftblr#reality shifting#shifting#desired reality#reality shifter#shifting community#shifting antis dni
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#disco elysium#tales from the backlog#kim kitsuragi#it’s the weekend wickie…..#the majority of this was done on one layer. which is sooooo inconvenient actua lly
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Me when I’m watching one of Bill’s insta stories nd he blows a kiss at the camera at the end.
#tokio hotel#bill kaulitz#bill kaulitz fic#bill kaulitz imagine#bill kaulitz x reader#bill kaulitz x you#actua footage of me#he can’t get away with this anymore#my fav blonde#instagram#2023!bill kaulitz
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Packing and unpacking between dog sitting houses is not great for someone who chronically loses everything
#me#selfie#I need to go get a haircut but my brain says it’s too soon#cute#girl#photo#love#fashion#brown hair#blue eyes#hot#I tag fashion like I’m actua showing off an outfit#it’s just one of those tags that I’m like yeah let’s throw that in there#a little sprinkle of nonsense#I’m pretty high#I took such a long t break and now getting high feel brand new
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God it’s such bullshit! They originally had Pentious as one and down but then said they loved him and made him main cast! THEN THEY MAKE US LOVE HIM AND KILL HIM OFF?!
Made us love him just in time to sexually assault him for laughs and then kill him.
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2024 reads / storygraph
Everything Under the Moon
Anthology of queer reimaginings of fairytales by mostly Australian authors
various genres, from contemporary to fantasy and sci-fi, mostly about older teens
mlm, sapphic, trans, nonbinary, demi, bi ace, and aromantic characters, some stories focusing on romance but many on familial relationships and siblings
#Everything Under the Moon#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#aromantic books#queer books#A really nice anthology of queer fairytales! definitely a mix of all sorts of stories.#Some were a bit forgettable (I mean I’m just not a short story person) but I really enjoyed others! I#I picked this up specifically because I heard there was an aromantic story (which I didn’t know much else about) and yeah it hit hard actua#it’s about being okay with loneliness and also centred around artists….so. it did make me cry a bit….#I liked that a lot of them focused on platonic r/ships - most on sibling actually? I appreciate that there were a couple sapphic aces too#I will say while the illustrations are really high quality (I especially liked the naturey ones) I found a lot of them depicted the chars#as very.....disnefied? idk. thin and generic. lacking 'imperfect' features like freckles even#(when they’re described as having them) With a couple exceptions for sure - but a lot of them were a bit samey#I would have loved some authors notes or a list of the stories because I didn’t recognise which all were inspired by#(though they’re on the endpapers; just not specified which) - I did find this in a GR review tho
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garlic bread is sooo good
#warrior cats#cinders#sol#i want to draw more but then i actua;lly have to put effort.#going out with a social worker to the libary tmr... i havent been to a libary in ages... i miss being young and reading 20 books while also#wartching 20 anime a week i want that prodecutivity#my laptop is lagging cant be fucked to respell thinfs#back to garlic bread goodbnye
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hmmm what video should they react to next sound off in the reblogs
#i actua;;y haven t fully processed the video like im about to rewatch it idk what the fuck did they say#phan#dan and phil
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I got these shoes from someone recently but thought they were way too plain looking, so I set out on a quest to customize them with some sharpies and charms and miscellaneous ribbon I had in my craft drawers. Mostly sky themed (clouds, rainbows, rain, stars, etc.) because that's my favorite aesthetic, but I had to include some cat imagery as well, of course lol.
#also honestly had NO IDEA that real converse have that star logo on the INSIDE not the outer part??? why the hell would you want it on the#inner portion where nobody can see it?? my entire life I always would have sworn it was on the outer facing portion..#I think these would be perfect IF they were just slightly taller (top part higher above ankles instead of just weird hard material digging#right into your ankle whenever you walk) and if they were actual good platforms. they're so short. It's good that 'chunky' shoes are gettin#more popular as they've always been my favorite Look ever since I had these shoes with roller skates that pop out of thebottom (not heelys.#but like. before those. it was two whole entire roller skate wheels like a normal pair of roller skates) and the bottoms were so tall and#clunky and it made my feet look giant (because it had.. entire wheels in the bottom pockets lol). so#I've alwatys been into the aesthetic but . still I find a lot of the 'brands jumping on trend' are too short of platforms#OR they're plafrorms with a raised back/heel/wedge which to me is not aesthetically good and also makes them exceptionally uncomfortable to#wear compared to just plain completely flat chunky platform bottoms. ANYWAY.. if these shoes had a 3 or 4 inch platform I think they'd be#cooler. however for what they are it's still fine! and I like them more now that they actually have some sort of anything to them and#aren't just plain white. The weird thing is that the material it's made out of (maybe some sort of leather or something) absorbs sharpie?#the color changes over time. You draw a mark and then leave it for a few days and it either fades into being barely there or has changed#colors. so I had to go back in and redo parts. ALSO the shoe chains are so funny because I did NOT have the right tools for them#I don't have the stuff to make bracelets or open and close the little rings. they're held onto the shoe with just safety pins and the actua#little rung things that hold the charms on half of them are like broken or the metal is just jam smushed together bent and warped hhbjhjhb#I actually like the back a lot where there's the irridecent star thing hot glued on there. it's cool and shiny. and the clouds#are sparkly on the main parts of the shoe though I'm not sure how well it shows up in pictures#ANYWAY... shoegs..... If I were rich this is one of the things I would definitely custom order from craftsman#why would I spend like thousands of dollars on plain ass shoes that are just expensive because they're a Luxury Brand when I could literall#like pay people to create me custom shoes to my exact specifications?? I could have like 5 inch flat platform boots with fur andclouds#and cat shaped holes in the bottom with LEDs in them with pom pom and charms and etc. etc. etc. Like as gaudy and excessively over#decorated as I want lol.. AND they could have skates in the bottom somehow!! ghjgbhjb#this on top of all the custom wizard costumes and period clothing I would order.. Like i LOVE customizing things. I love everything in my l#life being as particualr as possible and cultivating every experience I have to meticulously meet my own specific criteria as much#as is possible. If I had the money to I would never buy something from a store again. EVERYTHING I owned from furniture to clothing#would be either made by me - or mostly - comissioned from craftsmen. custom tiles for my floors. custom bed. custom table.#even like. custom toilet. custom sinks. etc. etc. ouGGH... but yeah.. anyway... shoes..
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Rewatching Code lyoko in its entirety to feel something again
#code lyoko#this time around when Jeremie said “code earth” i had actua chills wow guys#ugh season 3 will kill me 💔💔💔
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i get to hold a baby tomorrow. taps the mic. hello is this thing on i get to hold a baby tomorrow are you hearing me i get to
#the friend of mine had her baby and oh my fucking god she is so so small and dotie and tiny with his little nose and hands and i might actua#be v close to tearing up on this bus i am so full of love i want to puke#got v v shitty news at the start of the week but this saved it and i just . i just !#spent so many years trying to make sure she was ok and halfway to happy and alright and i wasn’t sure if i was ever going to live past 18#but! but!!!!! we’re both here and alive and standing and i’m on meds and wanting to be better and i’m starting to see what my future could#look like and it’s not so bad. i think i want it now. and she’s got a job and a home and a guy who thinks she is the bees knees and god oh#god she’s a mam. she is a mam. my friend i’ve known since we were 12 is a mam and she is so so happy#diary posting
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I wonder what happened with Darry and Paul (I think that’s his name?). I mean if they were good friends, I don’t think it would just fall apart when the Curtis parents died and Darry became the provider for his brothers. Was there a fight? Maybe Paul was angry at how Darry was throwing his life away so easily when he had a good future ahead of him. Did Darry, stressed while trying to get used to his new job/s, say something to break their friendship off? Did they just drift apart when Dar became “just a greaser” and not “fellow football player”? I’m curious
#maybe it was said in the book and i js missed it#idk but if they were actua friends ion think they would just turn against each other for the hell of it#paul holden#paul the outsiders#darry curtis#the outsiders#wildtalks
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By that, I meant what was his life, how did he come to be in a human family, if he goes to school, etc etc...
Oooh ok! So in my version of the AU ogerpon stuck around the mask maker's family for generations, just to check in. He was too scared to go into the town and luckily their house was on the outskirts. The older members of the family had a bit of an idea he was there so they'd leave little offerings like toys and treats out for him to take.
Putting under a cut since it got super long again...
It wasnt until the current generation of the family that he really got involved and that was because of Carmine. It has been ages since the family had a kid there. The younger family members tended to move away and then come back when they were older. But Carmine's parents passed away and her grandparents were the only ones willing to take her in. She was really young when this happened and tended to get into a lot of trouble.
So Ogerpon and Carmine had a bit of a Totoro situation going on initially. As she got older she kind of "outgrew" her imaginary friend ogerpon and her grandparents just knew that hurt the ogre. They actually approached ogerpon themselves one day, hiked up to his den and everything, and explained about how the Teal Mask worked, and how they could tweek it a bit to offer one wish. It was a comet sliver similar to what was found in the crystal pool. Their family had been holding onto it for generarions specifically for ogerpon, and they thought maybe now their relationship was good enough he'd accept it.
So ogerpon did and wished to be a human so he could have a family and people who loved him and wouldnt forget or leave him. And now suddenly there's a little boy who looks like them, no way they're not bringing him home. Only thing is ogerpon is a pokemon and doesnt know how to human, so for a while he won't go inside their house and would hide under the porch and need to be hosed down for bathtime.
Carmine obviously had questions but luckily she didnt know where babies came from so they told her thats your little brother he grew from a peach and she's like "sounds legit." There werent any other kids her age in town at the time so she genuinely thought Kieran was weird but he is a boy and boys are weird so him living under the porch for a few months is normal.
Eventually ogerpon grows into being the human named Kieran, gets domesticated lol, and is very happy. But also terrified of anyone finding out he's a pokemon, let alone the ogre. He has issues around crowds, new people, and doesnt really get social cues but he's trying. Him and Carmine are homeschooled because they are in the middle of nowhere, but Carmine loves pokemon and battling and works her butt off to get into BB academy. So she goes off and leaves Kieran behind.
So Kieran comes to the decision he wants to go to human school too. He like, needs Carmine, in that she is his buffer against the world. But also he heard how Carmine fought with their grandparents about wanting go to school, experience the world etc. And even though all he really wants is to belong somewhere, he is very curious about human school.
Only this human school is focused on battle. Kieran has never been in a pokemon battle but ogerpon sure has. And honestly ogerpon doesnt mind battling, he's a pokemon, it's how they communicate and settle arguements. Thing is "humans" can't battle eachother apparently that is illegal so he goes out and asks his besties if they want to go to human school with him as their trainer. (So Furret, Yanma and Applin) they think the idea is hilarious because pokemon dont direct other pokemon in battles. Lets go mess with everyone in human school lol.
So my Kieranpon battles. It's more rare since he is afraid of outing hiself by accidentally boosting his team's stats in excitement. That has happened before. And guess what they get in. Carmine is shook because wtf Kiki you don't battle?? Yes he does you just never asked.
BB Academy is incredibly overwhelming and Kieran becomes a wallflower almost instantly because it is taking so much out of him to adjust. But the Terrarium is fantastic, he loves it. He gets a bit of a reputation as a pokemom whisperer but its kind of more the campus meme no one really takes seriously. But they should because you should hear half of the shit these pokemon tell him about their trainers. He knows all the gossip. Everyone should be glad he writes like a toddler because Kieranpon's burn book would be devastating.
Teal Mask DLC would go pretty similarly, except Kieran's upset about the ogre is an old frustration at Carmine for not believing him, and as a result believing IN him (ogerpon). I'll use Juliana as the protagonist here though it wouldn't change if it's Florian. But his downward spiral is because of Carmine immediately believing their grandfather when he says ogerpon is good but not him even though he's been trying to convince her for years! And then she's trying to be all nice to the ogre but is going out of her way to leave him out, and so his his new friend wtf? It hurts to be purposefully left out of something, it really does.
So Kieran's downward spiral is more about Carmine not trusting him, coming to terms with how she doesnt remember how close they were when she was young because she adored the ogre so much then. And his overall upset that despite trying so hard to be a human its not enough because he became a whope person for her, so she wouldnt be lonely, and she's moved on from him, keeps trying to leave him behind, and won't meet him at where he's trying to come from. So yea Carmine discovers her brother is a pokemon after they get back ogerpon's masks. cue the drama.
She's mad, kieran's mad and very upset, their grandparents are trying to mediate. But once again kieran is a pokemon and pokemon don't talk to sort out their issues they battle. Ogerpon wiped the floor with Carmine's pokemon becauae they are still underestimating him (also he's like...a pseudo legendary?? Girl) So juliana steps in and she gets it. They battle, she's everything he wishes he could be as a person, she's everything he's not but through their battle he understands her fears, her flaws, how much she's struggled and finally someone gets where he is coming from. She beats him and kieran offers to let her catch him. Carmine is upset because wtf that is still her brother you can't take him so then she challenges Juliana to keep ogerpon.
Their fight is more Juliana trying to get through to Carmine that catching ogerpon isnt about ownership but more of a symbolic gesture that ogerpon (kieran) is ready to be loved, to be tamed. Juliana wins, catches ogerpon with a friendship ball, and gives it to Carmine.
Like she said catching a pokemon isnt always about posession or ownership. It's a connection between a person and pokemon. Her and kieran may have a connection but that doesn't mean ogerpon (kieran) is now hers.
Indigo Disk there is some drama but it's more Kieran needing to prove he can protect himself (he lost to Juliana she was a strong trainer and he wouldn't mind being a partner to her) but kieranpon here is working through some ptsd after the Loyal Three came back to life and stole his masks. So it's Carmine and his team trying to help him cope and stop being so self destructive. He's snappy but not cocky, more like zero patience because he's so exhausted from lack of sleep and constantly being terrified. More than once he'd accidentally stepped onto the court sending "himself" out to battle and other league members are like "this kid is wild kieran is nuts he tried to throw down with my slowbro"
Indigo Disk is the we face our trauma dlc. BB elite four eventually find out, not from Carmine or Juliana thet are very tight lipped about Kieran's secret. Not too sure atm how they find out but they do. Kieran needs more human friends who accept both sides of him.
Not sure about ships yet. I like kieran with the mc but not too sure on my feelings of shipping a pokemon with a human. Maybe him and Juliana would have a queerplatonic relationship going on? But no ships for now.
Also post indigo disk kieran loves Juliana's paladea friends. He think Nemona is stupidly cool she's literally a shonen protagonist he's kind of obsessed. Arven is secretly his favorite person in the world because Arven feeds him. Him and Penny have this oh thank god another introvert thing going on where they both like sitting in the dark and fluffy things.
#ask#not art#kieranpon#pokemon kieranpon#pokemon sv#kieran's pokemon sometimes join him in class furret has a little bookbag and notebook#they dont understand why they cant take classes at human school too because kieran is allowed to#furret actually graduates it has enough credits to get an actua diploma#kieran bites drayton once. he deserved it#carmine begs kieran to be her ace. he indulges her in matches with Drayton
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If you edit Norry and put Glip into that tweet, you'd see no difference between them. I'm sorry, that tweet looked so much like something Glip would say.
Hauntingly so. The only other person I've ever seen claim they were "tricked" into abusing a minor was glitchedpuppet.
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It’s so cute when people tell me to just get over it and stop playing the victim as if I had a choice of living in an endless loop of my trauma everyday
#tw bpd vent#tw bpd#bpd#actually bpd#bpd thoughts#tw ptsd#tw trauma#ptsd#boarderline personality disorder#actua
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