#bc at the end of everything they have the medicine to literally everything which is real love (which they have for each other intensely)
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I would like to know exactly how luke asking annabeth to run away with him went down.
#annabeth🥺#it's sad to think about how it'll be so much harder for annabeth to unpack and heal from that relationship bc he's dead#it's hard enough to come to terms with someone you love/held in high esteem hurting you so deeply#but she's also grieving him too so it's even harder to hold him accountable to herself and recognizing the good and the bad#she may struggle to not romanticize the memory of him#sorting through what about their relationship was pure and genuine and what was fueled by other stuff#both of their trauma really played into it in some of the worst ways...#but to even recognize how her trauma played into it she'd have to identify what her trauma even is and how it's affected her life#it's really complex and difficult work#and bc he's gone she'll never get to question him on stuff like what he was thinking at certain points and why#so certain things will never get the best closure#ugh it's all so fucked up#MAYBE SOMETHING WE COULD HAVE EXPLORED IN HOO RICHARD???? BUT NO#and it would have been perfect too bc she'd also be dealing with issues caused by both of her parents triggered by the MoA quest#like her mother's conditional love#and trauma from her mortal family#and her fear of spiders relates to both of these things bc it's a phobia that's passed down from her mom's actions#so she's being punished for something she's not responsible for and also being burdened with a quest simply for being her mother's daughter#and it also represents her mortal family's neglect bc they ignored her needs and all that...#AND THEN the only person she's received actually pure and good unconditional love from was snatched from her for 6 months#and the MoA quest could have been a way to confront some of these fears and wounds...so she's a little stronger by tartarus which#should bring out the best in her and the worst in percy#and then he can work through some stuff too down there#HoO could have been a journey for them where they're undone and then healed#bc at the end of everything they have the medicine to literally everything which is real love (which they have for each other intensely)#the rant I could go on about this...I have so many thoughts about what HoO should have been. maybe one day#annabeth chase#luke castellan#✏️
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rough beast ganondorf design + sketches + notes
design combines the typical boar form (dark beast + cloud form from botw), the oni one (demon king gan) hint at the draconic one to come but keep part of his humanity with his clothing being mostly intact
as the battle with Demon King Ganondorf comes to an end, the sages previously knocked out start to wake up again, he is cornered and hurt and as fear of being imprisoned, tortured and exploited overwhelms him he transforms into the Beast form, breaking the arena you were fighting him in and him going for Zelda as she is the biggest threat (he remembers her destroying dark beast gan and she reminds him of sonia, who is the one you sealed his human body back in the day)
you and zelda flee through the cracks of the earth as more earthquakes happen with a beast at your heels thats now truly only out to kill as fast as possible as he burrows after you (first sketch)
the path takes you both just below the surface and as you are trapped in a dead end zelda shields herself and link with her light shield ability, which protects you both from immediate damage but cant soften the impact from gan charging at you, the impact of which breaks you all three to the surface and the battle takes place in the same spot as botws dark beast fight-
fight is very challenging as gan is smaller than the dark best version, jumping and charging at you while still able to cast spells, now truly throwing everything he can at you in the hopes of ending you both
fight ends with you shooting an arrow at zelda, her deflecting it at the right angle and it shooting off the enigma stone on gans forehead; he falls seemingly defeated and as zelda runs to take the stone away gan through sheer panic lunges for the stone triggering his dragon transformation and making way for the final fight
(summary of the end: in the final fight gan snatches up both link and zelda once he transformed into the black dragon and takes flight toward the sky, zelda falls from between his teeth and knowing that she cant get to link and help him in any way from the ground she, while falling, takes out the enigma stone she has kept in a save container in her backpack all this time and swallows it for her own transformation, in her white dragon form she takes active action and charges at gans head so link is freed, then supports him in the fight itself;
at the end link plunges into dragon-gans mouth to reach the stone on the inside where he makes use of the 'medicine' previously made using the moonbloom taked from kogas secret lab, link and the stone are spit out and as gan reverses into a human and falls link is caught by zelda and he uses the second charge of it on her to bring her back as well;
as all three fall from the skies as the sages have made their way through the tunnel that beast gan made earlier, they help link and zelda getting to the ground safely while the yiga do the same for gan - final end end isnt determined yet but this is waht i got so far and even if i have written this once before i felt it was fitting to do it again and no you cant tell me this is too much of a wishfulfillment thing bc it literally is just that as i cant actualyl change whats in the game, so even if im trying to make it all fit well together i can still do what i want nhakjdbgshdbhsjka)
(totk rewritten project)
#ganondoodles#zelda#art#tloz#loz#ganondoodles rewrites totk#ganondorf#i wanted to do a little summary and it again ended up gigantic#anyway#design needs a little fine tuning but i just made this in one burst of motivation so uuuh yeah#love me some parallels#and yes both the dragons only appear in the final fight#bc the focus is on the cycle of violence that the sonau started again even if they had good intentions and you working to break that#you know- characters having complicated relationships and some things not working out well through a series of mistakes#not one dragon twist thing .. or whatever the canon game actually wanted to say except goD gIVeN mONarChY GOoD - EvIL gUy evIL#and yeah once you have seen one of my monster design you have seen them all#it always ends up like this but what can i say#das wat i be doing
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Ok but can we please talk about the trauma of HEALING from chronic illness too?
For 4 YEARS I've searched and gone through countless doctors and immense pain, obviously, very traumatic.
But now i have The Medicine that literally means i get to live a full life with manageable pain instead of unbearable pain.
But guess what, THATS TRAUMATIC TOO God was like "you may i have won the war but now REBUILD EVERYTHING FROM THE GROUND UP"
Because its not like, Take The Meds = All Better Now! It's more like take the meds = feel fucking amazing compared to before the meds but still not well enough to do shit and if you TRY to do shit you will feel immense pain again and everytime it happens you'll be terrified of losing everything again.
For example, when my mom started remicade she had to be on it FOR A YEAR before she could do Things™ again
And ya know how people say being IN the traumatic situation is easier to deal with than HEALING from the trauma (and in this case also physical damage) it caused?!! Thats what im talking about
Before Medicine™ i EXPECTED to just suffer forever, everyday was never ending pain, there was stability in the pain
Now everyday is "will i hurt or feel good?" "If i feel good is that "good" stable or fragile?" Like now i have the option of getting my hopes up, and it makes pain days feel worse!
If you give me 3 weeks of feeling pretty good, then give me a month of excruciating pain, im more miserable than if i never felt good! Its fucking hard!
Today was a horrible pain day and usually i can tune out and be like "thats life ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ " but today i was fucking mad! I was cursing at my microwave bc i forgot to turn it on to heat up my heat pack and that means 1 EXTRA MINUTE OF PAIN AND ITS UNBEARABLE. Even a literal extra minute sent me into rage. Ive been crying a lot too. And not just because its a pain day, 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘶𝘭𝘵. I woke up in this pain, and i didn't do anything today, or the day before to cause any flair up. Ive been in bed the entire time.
To finally have The Medicine™ means my brain IMMEDIATELY reverts back to "im SUPPOSED to feel good" which means i push myself to hard, too fast, and get my hopes up. Its fucking rough.
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hold on because your thing with alecto carrow & the carrow twins……… you really did something there
listen okay i could go so crazy about them . i have so much lore trapped away in my brain . but i am going to summarize so fast and quick bc they drive me crazy….
general info abt both of them : they r born in japan bc the carrow family moves there post grindlewald and their mom dies and when she dies they move back to the england but they r poor af after everything so pureblood society looks down on them for being traitors. cue them fighting the entire wizaridng war to be given respect and seen as a genuine member of the sacred 28 and using intimidation and violence to do so… a if i cannot be better than them i will be so much worse moment . their dad is normal and loves them very much they just choose to be evil like that. their mom was a sweet angel also and everyday i cry over her even tho i invented her to be dead . whatever
alecto has a weird misandrist complex in which she hates men but is also performing for them all the time , a man hating lesbian who also can’t escape using the patriarchy to validate her skills and ambition. she loves spiders bc they are matriarchal . she bases her worth off of how well she appeals to others and has so her whole life to the point she barely has a sense of self . she wants to kiss lily evans on the mouth and she worships her like an absolute angel it’s serious and vicious . the few scraps of herself she has left are all about knowledge. she is obsessed w language and translation and tries to learn literally any language she can ever . despite this she still can’t give herself a voice . she wants barty crouch jr dead for the crime of being a man and a degenerate which like fair of her . evan n reg r chill tho bc game respects game . i think if she got the chance to explore Life she’d actually choose to become a teacher like voldemort Made her become , but she would be actually pretty good tbh. her and barty regularly brawl in the teachers lounge. alecto kicks his ass. in the modern college au in my head they are regrettably roommates and each conversation they have sets gay lesbian solidarity back 15 years . alecto is studying classics and women’s studies as a minor …. ik feminism is a big part of her character but chat do not reduce her to this u don’t get it … she has a deep connection to lady macbeth and the movie the handmaids tale . here is her vibe :
and amycus is his mothers son who does whatever alecto wants him to bc he just wants to be by her side. they are so aggressively co dependent . he is obsessed w magical plants and herbology and his favorite thing in the world is a magical venus flytrap he keeps in his dorm that evan keeps putting random drops of blood into the mouth of . his dream career would probably be using magical plants to make new medicines n poisons n such . hogwarts resident weed dealer . therefore he n barty r actually chill . he just misses his mom like so much 😭 he is consistently in morning over the life he could have had . he’s pretty good friends w everyone he’s not like a loner but he is lonely deep in his chest…… of course bc alecto is his sister #feministwomenloveamycuscarrow . every carrow is linked to an insect in my head and amycus is a praying mantis . …. he has the same capability for cruelty like he also is on the field w alecto during the war but like he’d rather be gardening :/. modern college au he’s probably studying biology and is the rlly menacing president of the gardening club. and u think this means he is secretly sweet but he’s literally evil. him n reg have a crazy friendship going in in which they do the craziest romantic shit but it is completely platonic. i’m talking like candle lit dinners . in my head he has a weird situationship w rabastan (who is another story….) but also i have a *whispers* oc….. who in the fic i have planned for them in my head (which i will never write) he ends up w and his name is maxx <3 but i will never talk abt ocs on here . i have some shame. amycus would follow alecto to hell if she asked (he just wishes she would stop going the- *car runs me over*)
here’s amycus vibes
i have so much more i could say abt them . there is so much in my head they have such a deep and complex story … i will take any excuse to yap abt them . anyways they are both gay and one day i will write the alectolily sugar mommy au in which lily is the sugar mommy bc she’s a super famous author n alecto works at an antique book store doing translation n repair <3333 and it’s completely accidental lily keeps paying to borrow these super old books and eventually she just pays for alecto to come over and help her research and then one thing leads to another . and alecto is guffawed when she realizes. amycus. thinks it his hilarious. i think her and lily would have an academic rivals to loves thing going on in canon and in like Any school setting but also just in general. they could be 5 years into their relationship and still competing to be the smartest . i think there is rosekiller alectolily double date hilarity potential. also have a lot of thoughts abt them paralleling to the rosier twins but what do i know … i will leave that to the masters ….
anyways that was my yapping . hope someone felt enthralled .
#alecto carrow#amycus carrow#marauders era#marauders#death eaters#yap tag#there is so much more to say this barelt scratches the surface#unfortunately i work for 9 an hour at a chain pet store so i cannot yap
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hello yuwuta! i just read yuuta okkotsu's declassified jujutsu tech survival guide and i wanted to tell you that you are an incredible writer. you understand all of the characters so well and bring them to life in your aus so well. i am in awe of you. one of my favorite parts of the fic was that reader has a domain expansion, if you don't mind, expanding (heh) on that? what are the details of her technique other than healing and healing shikigami?
vibrating at intense frequencies trying to be normal about this ask bc omgeee. first of all, thank you for the sweet words, i’m so happy you enjoyed the fic 🫶 when i first started writing, i just knew i wanted reader to have rct as the kind of antithesis to all of yuuta’s cursed energy in a kinda opposites attract way, but the more i wrote the more i wanted them to be complements—so i wanted yuuta to learn rct and reader to be able to fight/take missions unlike shoko (queen) and in the end, if you couldn’t tell, i pulled inspiration from naruto… LOL
as for domain expansion, it’s supposed to be like a twist/play on words of the phrase “sterile field” like you would have in an operating room/medical setting, but for reader it’s a literal field or meadow like situation, and instead of having various medical assistance staff and/or tools, she has her shikigami. idk if in jjk you can technically get new shikigami but in naruto you sort of can lololol. it’s supposed to be a place for (guaranteed) healing those who are severely injured with little to no interruption or infection which is kind of the opposite of a domain expansion, but then i realized it could also allow for a guaranteed critical hit, it would just be… malpractice LOL but hey if the double glove fits… so, while everything in the domain can/should be used for healing, it can also be used to harm (like i imagine the individual blades of grass can be turned into surgical blades in her hand, i think in the fic reader mentions being able to make the bees sting/cause anaphylaxis and not just use their honey for healing, things like that)
for everything reader knows how to heal/fix, she also knows about 10 ways or things that could break or kill someone, so even tho rct/medicine is mainly used defensively or for aiding others, i imagine it could be pretty damaging in the wrong (or right?) hands, and then reader was born ❤️
i also subconsciously assc yuuta w medicine for this reason... do no harm but only for those he cares about… otherwise harm will occur xoxo
#i also subconsciously assc yuuta w medicine for this reason... do no harm but only for those he cares about…otherwise harm will occur xoxo#there’s a whole au in my head that follows this yuuta and reader through shibuya and the not so pretty side of her technique is shown#also aren’t curses are like… allergic to rct LOL but like someone like choso wouldn’t be completely subject to it so he’d be a good opponen#wait i think this is past anime spoilers for the next few tags teehee#also it would just drive yuuta insane to know that reader is in shibuya/guarding yuuji and he’s not… and then him coming back to assassinat#the drama i could dream of with these two… yuuta not letting reader heal yuuji’s heart bc he only wants you to touch his… anyway…#but also... he would follow reader wherever she goes he would be completely ineffectual fighting by her bc he just fights for her#like he's got rose colored goggles on... not listening to a word anybody else says LOL#but i have no way to ever fully articulate it/fight scenes so i just let it live in my head LOL#i also imagine that like… above the meadow situation there’s a gallery like there would be for an OR in a teaching hospital#anyway thank u for asking i have much to say about the things i make up for fics LOL#yuuta.fic
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15 Questions for 15 (girl idk that many 😭) Mutuals
thanks @druidberries for tagging me!!!
Are you named after anyone?
i feel like this is the dumbest thing ever bc like technically I’m named after my mom, or at least inspired by it, but we have very different names I just have the tamil version and she has the hindi version. My name means sweet melody and hers means melody. The reason I think it’s funny is because when my parents were getting married my dad asked his old teacher to come to it and upon hearing my mom’s name the first thing he says is ‘Oh her name’s Hindi so you should name your daughter the Tamil version.’ and here I am 😭😭
When was the last time you cried?
I literally have no idea probably like two weeks ago though I always got some shit going on lmao
Do you have kids?
absolutely not I’m in high school 😭 I’m still kind of on the fence of if I want them but if I do decide to have them I want a twin boy and girl and then I’m done pjasdhad
Do you use sarcasm a lot?
life is better when you’re sarcastic
What sports do you play/have you played?
I’ve danced for like, ten-ish years but other than like, badminton (and literally who is bad at badminton) I hate doing sports mnskjdksj
What’s the first thing you notice about other people?
Appearence wise I notice their eyes first, I don’t know if it’s because I draw a lot or wtv but I love looking at people’s eyes I’ve never met anyone without beautiful eyes. Aside from that I notice if they’re like?? comfortable talking to me because I hate the feeling of someone not wanting to talk to me I’d rather just back off first aksdjlasdj
Eye colour?
It’s the most boring colour of brown like it’s not even a cool type of brown it’s just. Desaturated brown 🙄
Scary movies or happy endings?
Horror movies with happy endings 🔛🔝🤭🤭 I watched this korean horror movie and they switched the ending from good to bad in the last five minutes and I hated everything about that decision tbh I’m a hurt/comfort girly till the day i die
Any special talents?
I don’t knowwww I don’t pay attention that but I am incredibly skilled at losing everything I put down ngl
Where were you born?
Toronto!!
What are your hobbies?
the sims (obviously), drawing, writing, reading, I like knitting a normal amount, literally anything to do with biology, true crime, failing at playing horror games w/ my friends, andddd I think that’s it? I’ve been getting into blender recently tho!
Do you have any pets?
girl i WISH 😭 i’ve been asking my parents since literally before I can remember and their answer is always ‘we already have three dogs at home’ like bae it’s been over a decade pls get a new comeback 😒😒
How tall are you?
6 feet tall 🥱🥱
Fave subject in school?
i love Science when I actually understand it I’ve always been into it which is why I’m going into medicine after I graduate like women in STEM core is going so hard
Dream job?
UMMM I’ve always wanted to be in medicine(well, ever since I made the decision when I was 7) but I’ve kind of jumped in between a few paths. Like I wanted to be a midwife, then I wanted to be a neo-natal nurse (still debating this one tbh it’s mad interesting) and I also want to be an anesthesiologist bc it’s cool and they make bank but either way I have to take the same courses all the same so it’s fine
also don’t know if any of yall have done this so just ignore this if u have and spare me the shame 🏃♀️🏃♀️: @strangecowplant @crsentfairy @afrolotus @finnsim @sierraelil @simsyworld @shadezovgray @d4isy-nukes @buttertrait @izharza @helltrait @baersims @bnt0 @alt-simz @nooboosim
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ooh bc of that other post men w p*ssy etc yes im asteriskinf that akbdjsjdnd here are some for ur consideration:
-the joker. i know his like Thing is to be mYsTeRiOuS etc love the commitment to being unknowable in this day and age but does this not make everything make sense. first period and he went Round The Bend
-jiang cheng from the untamed. if he isnt epitomy of little sister syndrome then idk what. youngest sibling forced to shoulder inheritence, wanting to just be his pissy self but Knowing his family sees that as a symptom™️ of his nature™️, in love w his brother etc he deserved a happy ending just for not qi deviating
-kakashi. sad wet floppy eared pathetic etcetc comes back from missions just needing to get dicked down :/
-cloud strife, epitomy do i want him or want to be him @ zack etc, fellow trans sephiroth understands but they still have to fight obviously, poly w valentine and tifa
-naruto, tbh the reigning hc rn is intersex nar bc ive seen some on ao3 honestly, but i also love the idea of naruto henging from when he was waay young and literly he cannot even rmeembr which way was the ~~~reyale~~ him so his sexy no jutsu takes on new meaning bc 1) he may have been doing the child idk what this is do u see this what is this thing and that was him attempting to convey questions he didnt know how to ask or 2) literally literally!!!! just doing it for attention™️ bc he wanted to gauge ppls opinions on it and the different reactions hed get, maybe he finally settled on no boobs no dick bc 1) it made ninja work easier and 2) he didnt need boobs but self lube does make things easier faster etc
-gaara. Obviously naruto inspired him
-itachi deidara litrrly the entire akatsuki is trans
-ooooooo doumeki from xxxholic
-dazai from bsd bc i feel like it
-L from deathnote bc light the misogynist(affectionate)'s reaction to finding out the worlds greatest detective and the man currently beating him at his own game having a p*ssy would be priceless and id be willing to risk my name getting written down just to see the mental gymnastics hed have to do to decide whther L is a Real Man™️ (bc only a Real Man™️ could beat/or even compete w him) OR if the vagina having means L /isnt/ a Real Man™️ which means he ends up losing to a female (possibly the true reason for his eventual insanity which he Deserves)
-also obviousy mello and near
-someone on twtter keeps writing p*ssylian (xie lian from heaven officials blessing)
-medicine seller from mononoke
-idk gojo makes sense to me
-allen walker from d gray man
-saiiiiiiiiiikiiiiiiiiiii
-either/both shion/nezumi from no6
-vanitassssssssssssss
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I really want to write a fic about this stuff but I also just want to talk about it now so some of my ✨Pete Headcanons✨ from someone who has never read the novel
He’s the bastard son of a powerful politician
His mother died when he was young so his grandmother raised him with monetary support from his father
His half-siblings are a lot older than him and pretends he doesn’t exist
He was kidnapped when he was about 12 and that’s part of the reason he was put on Tankhun’s detail
His father paid for bodyguards for a while after his kidnapping, but he knew they weren’t going to stick around, so he asked them to train him
He first met the Theerapanyakuns when he was 14 at a banquet he technically wasn’t supposed to be at but his grandmother was out of town for a week so his dad had to watch him
He mostly hung out in the kitchen and people thought he was a server’s kid
Kim found him and demanded to be taken to a training room or something
So Pete took him to the gym which was really the only place in the house he hung out in besides “his” room
Kim beat the shit out of a punching bag while complaining to Pete about being forced to be there and Pete was like same
Korn came to find Kim and Pete thought he was the Scariest Person Ever but also it was the first time a rich guy had ever been nice to him
He ended up applying to be a bodyguard when he was kicked out of university for a fight with this rich guy who was being homophobic and his father “officially disowned him”
He and Big were in the same group of trainees and they were actually pretty close until Big got put on Kinn’s detail and became a wet blanket
He started smoking when he was 16 to impress on of his half siblings (who was like 25 at the time)
And a few years later that same sibling was like “y’know that’s so bad for you right? that’s why i quit”
And Pete is just like 🙂 you’re the one 🙂 that gave me 🙂 a nicotine addiction 🙂 but thanks 🙂
His grandma tried to teach him how to cook but he’s not as good as her
He’s still good but he doesn’t believe anyone who tells him that bc “it’a nothing like my *grandma’s* though”
Loves strawberry chapstick but hates actual strawberries or any strawberry-flavored food or medicine
Actually speaks pretty good English and Mandarin but hides it for the sake of his unassuming persona
His bodycounts are currently 4 and 9. You can decide which ones I mean
Had a cat growing up that he *hated* but literally cried for a week straight when it died
I can’t remember if this is canonical or not but loves spicy food
Like his starting spice level is enough to make most people’s eyes water
(On that note, I hc that Pete, Porsche, and Porschè can handle spice while their bfs canNOT)
Wanted to be a trophy husband growing up. Like, he wanted to marry a celebrity and just spend his time vibing
He used to try to emulate his dad a lot so he’s actually very good at negotiations, diplomacy, and controlling his image
He’s a great problem solver if someone he loves is panicking but otherwise you could give him the answer and he still wouldn’t know what to do after shit hits the fan
Is the master of creating his own problems and talking his way out of them (see: sneaking into Vegas’s rooms in ep 7)
Is not a gossip but people keep telling him things/saying things without knowing he’s there so he knows almost everything that goes on in the mansion
CW Violence for the next one: He once spent a month going undercover in a rival gang and it was the first time he got tortured. He managed to escape but he was in recovery for over a week. He did get a hella raise and bonus though (Tankhun made sure of it)
His favorite series is Tankhun’s least favorite so he can’t bring it up without getting a lecture on why it’s Bad
I have no basis for this but I believe that when he’s sad, he listens to Alec Benjamin
Knows how to braid but can’t remember how, when, or why he learned
Owned heelies once. Never again.
The first time any of the bodyguards were ever scared or intimidated by him was when he was just chilling in the dining hall when suddenly he trows a chopstick like a knife and it nails itself to the wall. The whole room goes silent and he just shrugs and says “there was a fly, don’t want it to get in the food”
(Someone checked after, and there was a bug squished on the end of the chopstick when they took it out of the wall)
He has played Korn in chess once and won. He is now no longer allowed to play chess in the compound
Has the third highest accuracy score out of the guards on his level of experience. The first is Arm and the second is Big (and Big only beats him by a little bit)
Drowning is one of his biggest fears and the getting out of ropes in the water challenge was the hardest for him in training
Conversely, he loves heights and has repeatedly been the one to volunteer when they need someone high up for a good viewpoint
Is friends with a lot of other guards in other mafia families but he’s not entirely sure which families
Hates wearing sunglasses, even in very bright sunlight, so he wears visors a lot
Can’t ride a motorcycle and is jealous that Porsche can
Has zero musical skill. Trust him, he has tried, please don’t make him prove it
Was never really poor but never really had the riches that the Theerapanyukans had so some of the things they did shocked him a lot when he first started
Actually prefers suits to his normal style of clothing because it takes too much energy to match stuff
Tankhun has tried to help him with his clothing style but he just doesn’t care that much
Changes his hairstyle frequently bc he feels like he has a pretty forgettable face and likes to violently remind people of his existence
Once took a pottery class. It wasn’t bad but it’s not something he would do again
Has an almost hypocritical love of the beach
Dyslexic but not a lot of people know about that
Once shot a guy in the dick. The story of how and why changes each time he tells it but he *swears* he has
His favorite Disney character is Heihei the chicken from Moana and actually considered buying a chicken
Has a very specific taste in pens and by that I mean he somehow always picks the one that’s dried out. Every. Time.
Scared of hummingbirds but has actively sought out interaction with several bees, snakes, spiders, and large carnivores
Used to be bad at jump roping but now he’s okay. He just did not realize when he was young how much jump roping would Not Be A Thing as he got older
Loves penguins and has many a penguin plushie
Is actually Kim’s favorite bodyguard but they don’t hang out a lot
#i probably could make so many more#i have attached myself to this character#nothing is taking him away from me#not even vegas 😤#kinnporsche the series#pete phongsakorn#headcanon#headcanon list#can you tell im hyperfixating#pete > everybody else#kim theerapanyakun
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Act Two Notes: 後悔莫及 (Too Late for Regrets)
On AO3
Relationships: Jiāng Yànlí & Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Jiang Yanli/Original Character; Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn & Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín & Wēn Qíng; Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxian
Characters: Jiāng Yànlí; Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Original Characters; Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín; Wēn Qíng (Módào Zǔshī); Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín and Wēn Qíng's Mother; Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī
Additional Tags: Time Travel Fix-It; Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence; Jiāng Yànlí-centric; POV Jiāng Yànlí; Genderqueer Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Trans Male Character; Kid Fic
Hello!
TBH I considered posting this fic here but I truly can't be bothered to figure out how to put all the links and everything so I'll just post the whole fic once it's finished on AO3. In the meantime, I have literally So Much to say about this fic because it's been rotting my brain for weeks now, and there's only so much I can fit in the author's notes, so here we are!
DON'T READ PAST HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT SPOILERS
So, act two:
I have SOO much to say about this chapter and I’ll try to go chronological:
I was very careful with how I presented Jiang Yanli here. On one hand, to get the ending I wanted, she needs to literally stage a coup all by herself (at first). On the other, I didn’t want to fall into the same pit so many authors do when trying to bring power to female characters, which is make them girl boss.
I don’t think Jiang Yanli would ever try and build her martial skills, as we get in the text that she had little interest in it. As cool as it sounds, she wouldn’t do such a thing as wield a sword or Zidian unless pushed to great lengths. This fic has her using cooking as a way of cultivation, and I became obsessed with the idea. I did my best to veer away from copying it and instead adding my own twists, which is why I leaned into traditional Chinese medicine, specifically food therapy.
WEI YING WITH SAILORMOON BUNS AND RED BOWS!!!!!!! Pls I’m obsessed 😭😭😭😭 his ponytail is cute and all but I just love the image of him with cute, more feminine hair styles bc he would look SO GOOD! Imagine Lan Zhan’s reaction…
I added the bits about Wei Ying’s tantrums because I wanted him to be a kid, something I don’t think he was ever allowed to be, hence the playful, childish mannerisms he keeps up well into adulthood. “Xianxian is three” is adorable and I love that inside joke with his shijie, but it has some really sad implications. I think Wei Ying was forced to grow up too fast and too early, and that kind of trauma Fucks You Up. Hence, he deserved to have a meltdown once he felt safe.
Wen Ning and Wei Ying being best friends and then siblings? It’s just what they deserve!! They’re so cute
OOOHHHHH BOY I was so excited to finally introduce Cai Yiben!!! This character really grew on me. When I originally had the idea, I was just going to have Wei Ying be trans/genderqueer and let Jiang Yanli have a nice cottagecore-esque Lesbian dream life, but I thought 'You know what? No, she deserves a hot transmasc to rock her world,' and I believe I made the right decision.
Jiang Yanli realizes her feelings for Cai Yiben so late because of comphet, but as a commenter said it could also be read as her finding him more attractive (NOT in a fetish way) once he came out as trans, because trans people are HOT.
Next chapter is a short interlude focusing on Cai Yiben, so stay tuned!
#Too Late For Regrets fic#my writing#wip#mdzs#wei wuxian#wangxian#lan wangji#mo dao zu shi#the untamed#writing#jiang yanli#mdzs fanfic#mdzs fanfiction
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HII ALLIE!!! im home now from my concert and omfg 😭😭😭 harry is literally so gorgeous. louis is such a lucky mf. during mfasr i was SCREAMING, “YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU BABE!!” because louis was CLOSE to us. so in my mind, he could hear us. i could feel harry’s love for louis during that song and loved how everyone in the room was singing about how much harry loves louis (whether they know they are or not.) but harry was so cute and happy!! he was jumping around and having so much fun. i ended up spilling my water bottle mid concert LMAO! i got the really pretty lavender hoodie, a poster, and a shirt!! i can’t wait to binge read fics bc i miss harry SO MUCH now. i genuinely think this concert was way louder than the last one i went to ngl. my ears were muffled or something, it was so strange. during kiwi, i let my anger out so much. with everything going on irl and with bbg, i was screaming my lungs out. i brought binoculars so i saw harry REALLY CLOSE UP, and can i just say that he’s beautiful. BUT IT WAS SO DIFFICULT TO LOOK AT HIM THROUGH THEM BECAUSE HE NEVER STOPS MOVING!!! i’ll never ever ever ever ever EVER shut up about how gorgeous he is. the crowd kept chanting medicine, but harry did not deliver 💔 i wish i could have seen louis!! i just though he was coming on at nine as well. if i knew i would have been able to make it to both, i would have!!! i’m just thankful that i got to experience this and with them being so close to each other. i’m already saving up to see louis, so i really hope he announces tour soon!!! ALSO!! these were the posters i made, i couldn’t really hold them up because it was dark so there was no point. but i did hold up the be proud one when he was giving a speech!!! no idea if he saw it or not, but if he did then i hope it made him feel valid and loved. i remember during a song, i can’t remember which one though, it might have been cinema. but he kicked something and my thoughts immediately went to, “wow, louis has been teaching him football.” im just SO thankful that i’ve gotten to see harry twice, he never ever ever fails to put on an incredible show. now if i were to rank the shows i’ve been to between harry and louis, i know louis would be first, but i don’t know about my two harry shows. nothing will ever beat the feeling i got when i saw him for the first time, but this show was so fun!!!! so i guess my two harry shows are tied!!!
Ahhhh that's so amazing, love! Thank you so much for sharing your experience, it seems like you had a blast 🥰❤️ The entire thing just made me so happy, this is wonderful I love it!!!
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My mid class crisis of this semester:
I'm literally crying.
I think I've been pushing this thought a lot back, but now that I have my first in person midterm exam in uni, it's kinda exploding on my face. I feel so bad, and unmotivated, and confused, and i hate every course that im taking except for one but even for that one even if i pay attention so much that i understand the topic and participate in seminaries, even then I fail the virtual exams.
I've felt like this almost since I began studying this, only anatomy saved me last semester and kept me afloat and that was my only motivation, but this year and semester.... There's nothing. And now. I have this big exam tomorrow evening and the only path I've got is to cram all night today and hope that i pass (which i don't think i will).
Watching and listening to my classmates and some of my friends enjoy so much this career and seeing them thrive (not just survive) in the courses is just so bizarre to me, and it makes me sad bc (i hate how selfish this sounds) that should've been me. I was almost top of my class all during highschool, had straight 20s (the highest score in my country) in classes like biology (which i loved in school, it was almost my favorite subject) and chemistry, i never studied (never needed to and never learned how to) and felt that medicine was what i really really wanted to do.
...then we go to uni and all my dreams are crashed. I barely pass biology by 2 points, chemistry is torture too, i hate everything, i hate the doctors who are teaching. My friends kinda feel the same, but theirs is different, they don't think of quitting as much as I do, or nearly as daily as I did (do).
The thought of quitting gives me so uncertainty, i am not sure even if if I quit what would i study. I always joke about wanting to study Poli sci, but do I? What if i just get stuck in another never ending cycle like with medicine and end up hating it too? Maybe i will hate the courses there too. Plus maybe I'm too old, people will look at me. Is it too late? Have i wasted 2 years of my life? And all the people I'd let down if i quitted, my mom who had to make such an effort to pay for uni, my grandparents who are so amazed and happy about me studying medicine.
I think about the last one a lot.
Part of me feels as if studying medicine gave me a sort of intellectual superiority (it's dumb ik) but. Everytime I meet someone and they ask what I'm studying, i say med and fuckin hell, they're amazed, entranced, by how I'm studying medicine and idk, i don't wanna let do of that feeling even if it's stupidly selfish of me.
Also. I left this in drafts for about 2 hours bc i had genetics kahoot and dude I love that subject, its keeping me afloat and i did good and only missed 2 questions out of 22. I don't feel like crying anymore, but I'll probably do when I start studying. I think what I'll miss the most if I quit is all the people that I've known bc even if they tell u you can still stay in touch, it's not the same. I'll miss hanging with them, planning to stay in campus to study, going out for coffee or food, idk that stuff. I don't wanna let go of the familiarity that this major brings me.
To be fair, i have these career crisis almost every semester (so 3 times almost bc 3 semesters have passed) but this one is the one that hit me harder and made me actually cry. My counselor who is also a psychiatrist told me that this was the hardest semester and that these courses were the most ugly, but then it would get better. Maybe i should believe her; it's almost what happened to me the first semester, second semester came and it was better and i felt better. I didn't feel amazing, and in love, but it felt better yk.
Idk what I'm hoping to achieve with this post, just getting my thoughts out of my head (I don't think I've ever done that) and hope a little venting works for me.
Anyhow, too much of my feelings xd
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My personal workout/dieting tips:
1. It's okay to have a weight loss goal, but never set a deadline. All it's going to do is put you down if you're not where you expected to be as you're approaching it
2. Allow yourself to eat the foods you crave. The more you criminalize the food you eat the higher the chance of you hating yourself or punishing yourself if you cave in, which can manifest in two different ways. One, you will end up starving yourself for a few days, bc you feel it's what you deserve or two, you're going to binge eat the guilt, which will later turn into you giving up, bc you feel there's no going back after what you just did. If you want that piece of candy or bag of chips just eat it. Punishing yourself for "giving in" will do you more harm than good. Treat yourself
3. Everything you eat doesn't need to be "diet" food. Just eat in moderation. I don't have vegetables, fruit and chicken everyday and I'm doing just fine. And carbs? I eat them all and I'm still loosing weight. I stopped counting carbs ages ago, bc it made me literally want to die. Same with calories. I had the apps. I kept track of everything I ate and calculated my calorie intake on a regular basis and it was exhausting. I'd have to carefully plan every meal, bc if I didn't by time dinner time came I'd only be able to eat a meal worth 150 calories even though my stomach would be eating itself whole. I was letting an app dictate my right to eat. It was a depressing way to live
4. Stop watching tiktok and youtube influencers. Stop letting these people tell you what to do and what not to do. They make dieting and working out extremely miserable and undesirable. They make it seem like eating anything other than their recommended meals (which are often times expensive or unrealistic) or doing anything other than the workout routines they do isn't going to accomplish anything. You don't need these people. I eat what I please and I came up with my own workout routine. Once I stopped letting influencers get in my head I genuinely started to enjoy my lifestyle change
5. You don't have to workout everyday. I try for at least 3 days out of the week. The more you push yourself when you don't feel like it the higher the chance of you giving up. Do what you can when you can
6. Your workout also doesn't need to be vigorous. My workout lasts around 40 minutes and most of it is done with a yoga mat, a weight bench and a medicine ball. It's enough for me to break a sweat. I'm not training for the olympics, so I'm not going to stress and exhaust my body like I am
7. Patience is key. Stop examining your body in the mirror everyday and getting discouraged. What you want isn't going to happen overnight
8. STOP watching skinny fit people who post videos for weight loss, because 9/10 the exercises they do are nearly impossible if you're overweight. I remember my mom watching some videos on YouTube and she couldn't do a single one of them, bc the people in the videos all forgot one key element in their workout routines; our stomachs. These people have been skinny all their life. They don't know what it's like to be in our bodies, so they have no idea how to properly coach us. If I want tips or inspiration I watch other plus size people or people who were once plus sized. It's more helpful and realistic
9. It's okay to take long breaks. Sometimes, I don't workout for a few weeks at a time. I used to stress over gaining the weight back, but I never do. My body looks the exact same as it did before
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Hi hi. So I take the term equestrian quite loosely for myself because I live in a town and am not rich I’ve never had the chance to actually have my own horse. But I’ve been riding horses since I was like 4. My cousin owns a stables that is a couple of hours away from me so that was my introduction to riding.
I don’t compete due to the lack of my own horse but I practice English style riding with show and cross country jumping styles. I’ve also dabbled a little in western riding.
Even though none of them are actually mine bc I rode and helped out at one stables for such a long time it definitely felt like some of them were. Especially there’s this one mare Daisy who is a proper little asshole. She will bite and kick and buck and barely even moves for the lesson kids. But I hopped up on her when I was a kid and we just connected. She was like a different horse altogether.
Anyway I am very much so rambling and I had one other thing to say to you which is and the medicine vinyl. Ik you said it reminds you of the colour of US pill bottles and I find that so interesting bc originally it was made to be the colour of h.
Anyway yeah btw also I am LOVING the daily prompts! Hope ur having a nice day :)
-♥️
Hey! Doesn't matter if you own a horse, or how often you ride! If you've taken lessons you're an equestrian in my book! That's so cool that your cousin owns a stable!
But damn you are much braver than me! I do NOT have the nerve to ever go cross country schooling omg I love watching it but the jumps are so solid? I also prefer English style riding (show jumpers unite!) but Pop is a jack of all trades (re: I get an idea and he is forced to go along with it lol) and we've done a little bit of everything - jumping is what we both like best though. He's a little peanut of a QH that I never had any intentions of buying but is the absolute love of my life, and as a QH I'm so lucky he is so versatile and is game to do a little bit of everything, English and Western, as long as he doesn't have to go through any kind of water including puddles 😂
It's always so special when you meet a horse that you just ~vibe~ with and it's like oh you're my guy/gal. Daisy sounds like such a mare lol was she chestnut as well by chance? I know that they say once you become a mares person they will literally do anything for you.
I also used to have a chestnut Oldenburg mare that I did more upper level show jumping with but that ended in absolute flames and I sold her about a year ago (I'm not sure if I hated her more, or she hated me more by the end lol) 💀 I hope I can one day get another upper level horse especially with Pop getting older but currently I am still terrified to get on any horse that isn't him 😂 Also I am so sorry for rambling on about this I get so excited talking about horses 😬
Oooo you're so right! I'm not a vinyl person (I literally only bought the neon orange Medicine vinyl because i have a weird attachment to the song now after the A&E fic and wanted to frame the sleeve and hang it with all my other 1975 stuff) and completely forgot that was a thing... I feel like that makes it even more poetic that it's the color of medicine/pill bottles in the US now? Even though it probably wasn't on purpose? I have decided that I am going to read into the symbolism and pretend it was on purpose even though I fully made it up (Hey DH - you can steal my idea though and pretend it was on purpose if you want though!)
Thank you so much for following along with the daily prompts! It's been such a fun little exercise and I've really enjoyed working on them! I didn't expect anyone to even read them, and was only posting to hold myself accountable so to find out that other people are enjoying them as well is so special and cool!
Thank you so much for reading, your support and sending in these asks! I apologize for writing little rambling novels in response, just like horses man! They're the BEST!
❤️Ally
#allylikethecat#ask ally#anon ask#fanfiction#keep it kind#matty fic#gatty#fanfic#All The King's Horses#ok so the mare and i were really good to start#but we had a wreck about a year and a half ago that was pretty gnarly#and physically we were both mostly okay (she was fine i was half purple with bruises but i didnt break anything)#but like emotionally we never got over it and things kinda fell apart and my trainer was like we'll give it six months#and if it doesn't get better we can sell her and you can focus on Pop again until we find something else#jokes on her im terrified of riding horses that arent pop now#i sat on my friends super sweet schoolmaster that i've known forever and ridden before#just trotted her around and i thought i was going to die#so anyway it is just Pop and I against the world these days lol#and will probably continue to be that way for a long while longer#i love him so much though#sometimes i'll just be sitting there and start crying because i love him so much#and i like to think he loves me too#in whatever way horses are capable of love#regardless he is my GUY
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mental illness
this shit aint no joke i might be manic rn and idk what to do with that. It's crazy to think just a year ago i was on celexa feelings so happy and no sad for once. And it was sunny the sun was out i was just a happy person out of no where. And no a year later im sad but i can't feel it. Also i can't remember anything i'm doing last time i was like this was november/october and parts of December. It's scary but i can't help it literally. It just feels so weird to realize it and i don't know how to overcome it. I'm watchhing skins which is probably really bad. Also chris just dropped the fucking baby wtf i dion't remember that. I love him and he deserved everything. Anyways i went on a date and all i could think about was peanut butter and another guy so that was fun. I also just didn't like him in the end he was a weirdo and i didn't realize he was 28 fucking 28!!! thank god i had my friends there tho if they weren't i wouldn't have escaped. I think he found it weird that i was there with my friends but tbh like you were a weirdo. and did he really think i was gonna go an hour away alone???? men are fucking weird and insufferable. I’m too scared to go out with women because that’s a whole different world. I also had this nice creamer for coffee and now my tonsil stones are huge and i tried to get them out, but it decided to bleed instead so now i really want to get them taken out, but the pain??? no thank you. might be going back into my disordered eating too rn. I feel like im floating and i can never touch or reach the ground, it seems impossible rn. And i think that’s whats going to sned me over the bridge. Also there’s ppl who are getting assited sewer slide bc of their bpd. which is really sad and scary that we offer that. But like do you know how bad it must be for someone to go through that esp with it being with medical help. Like you had to really think that through. idk it feels like something i would do bc sometimes my mind won’t shut up i think me being on medicine is better obiviously before i decide to go that route. but i just can’t handle how my mind is going rn bc it sucks and nothing is gonna help me rn, how tf did i do this. oh wait i was barely surviving nvm. I feel like even tho celexa was short term it did somewhat help but i need something stronger. idk my mind needs to be erased i can’t think like this is makes me feel fucking crazy. i don’t think me being a psycholgoy studnet is helping.
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okay so ummm. well i got shy but it's basically an obsessive autassassinophile (maverick, he/they), his current "love interest" whos an assassin (samael, they/them) and a medicine student with repressed anger problems due to his strict parents who likes organs a bit too much (blade, he/him).
*WARNING: THIS SHIT GOT TOO LONG AND I GOT OUT OF ANON TO PUT A READ MORE IM SO SORRY*
maverick considers murder as the ultimate form of love and sexuality due to associating it when he himself was stalked and nearly murdered by another character (zachary, he/him), well mav killed him in self-defense in a panic (zachary actually revived as a demon but he doesnt knows that) but his mind did a reverse uno card for dealing with the fact he killed someone and now *hes* the stalker lol. and now interprets what happened to him as ~the most romantic time of his life~ and desperately wants for it to happen again. he looks for getting in situations like that by basically using the dark web and snvff/gore sites as dating apps.
this is where he meets samael, but maverick pretends he met them "by chance" instead of telling them he knows about their particular "job" and that he has been "studying" them for months before making the first move to actually meet each other. to this point mav already formed an obsession with them, and molds his entire personality to fit what they would like, in hopes of being of their taste, them falling in love with and eventually murdering him 💖 out of love 💖. this has yet to happen due to samael being closed off emotionally and actually wanting a friend more than a partner, since they were forced by their family not to have a single friend while they were still in school, because that would risk them telling their peers about "family secrets" (they come from a family of assassins) lol. however, they're quite dependent of maverick, and if they saw even the slightest threat of him losing interest on them, they will do *whatever* he wants them to do, regardless if it goes against what they want.
however, in the middle, maverick and blade had "a thing" through internet, because mav recently had a nasty "break up" with his ex gf (roxy, she/her. she never saw him as anything but a toy to unleash her sadistic desires on) and so was in #hoemode, in which he "messed around" with blade, and for these two it meant narrating deranged gory fantasies to each other, both what mav wanted him to do, and what blade wanted to do to him (included but not limited to ripping off his organs while they were fucking and then fucking these organs when hes dead).
blade is kind of a dumbass so he genuinely got attached to maverick and wanted to meet him in person n everything. but mav didnt wanted that due to finding samael and ghosted him lol. so now hes trying to get maverick back to his side, and acts like a scorned lover. considering the town they all live in isnt really that big, they did ended up meeting in person but by chance in a party lol (they knew how each other looked). whenever they see each other, blade tries to get intimate but it kind of... doesnt works lmao. even when theyre literally a match made in heaven. (maverick does gets kinda horny when it happens though bc that man gave him the best fantasies of his life, and sometimes masturbates with a knife [which side he uses depends on how horny he is] thinking about their little chats together tho)
so yeah, these are some of my ocs. once again im so so so sorry this got extremely long, i just have a lot of oc lore
No no don’t apologize! Tbh I would totally read a book about these characters. Makes me want to go make more of my own ocs lol. Loved this, thank you so much!
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my chest hurts from coughing
i haven’t slept properly in two days bc i was holding my muscle relaxer so i could take the prescription cough medicine safely
the prescription cough medicine is no longer helping my cough
i am stressed and worried over *redacted real world things because it would potentially betray what state i live in* and how these things relate to people i love
i’m upset because i feel like i’m failing my sister, because she had a shitty week and didn’t even tell me until I asked why she was being quiet, which makes me more reluctant to complain to her about MY shit because it’s not like I’ll ever know if she’s going through too much to deal with it at the time. but regardless she didn’t tell me, so I wouldn’t even have had the opportunity to try to come help her. not that i really could anyway since i’ve been sick but. god i don’t know.
i am stressed over a conversation i probably need to have with a doctor at work tomorrow that she is Not Going To Like. and her not liking my solution to her problem will potentially cause me more problems but i literally have no other ideas to try to fix her issue.
i’m stressed and worried bc i think there’s other stressful shit on my to do list tomorrow that i can’t remember
i’m REALLY worried that going to work tomorrow is going to make me sicker, again, and make the cough even worse, again, but i can’t just call in because i will get so behind on everything, AGAIN, and there aren’t people to help cover my shit.
and YES i realize getting sicker and needing more time off will not be helpful in the long run. i KNOW. i KNOW i should be prioritizing my health over my job. but i can’t. i’ve unfortunately wrapped my identity up into being Good At My Job (kids don’t do this) which includes being reliable and being like, actually there to do my job.
and this is all just piling up into a pit of awfulness compounded by money worry, and worry that i’m not living life to the fullest potential and that i’m just kind of coasting by instead, and horrific loneliness bc i don’t have close friends, and anger at myself bc i don’t know how to make friends, and anger at myself because even though i have friends on here on this website i don’t know how to engage and become actual close friends because i just end up drifting away or holding myself at arms length because I’m not GOOD at actually opening up to people when i’m talking directly to them. i can word vomit here under this read more all day long. but i can’t have this conversation directly with any person.
just. augh. i’m such a tangle of emotion tonight and i think i only covered like half of the things bothering me lmao. i just don’t wanna go to work tomorrow, i don’t wanna deal with any of this. i wanna play video games and sleep.
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