#bastard speaks
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So we definitely need more positive representation of DID, but you know what would be funny? Mildly inconvenient representation of DID.
Oh the world is ending and you need to know about this one specific thing? Yeah I have a guy for that but he doesn't feel like fronting right now
Sorry what's happening rn is this the bad guy? Yeah I just switched in idk what's going on
I know you're dating one alter but we're currently co-con with another alter who hates you so idk how I'm feeling rn
And just who do i think I am? It's funny you should ask that I actually don't know right now
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College is so funny it’s like a convention where you cosplay as an adult for 4 years
#and then you are forcibly released??#I can only compare it to animal de-socialization programs#ah yes provide me enrichment and then release me into the wild#where I will die within 2 years#bastard speaks
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My favorite bastards of all time (and space)
#starkid#ted spankoffski#tinky#t’noy karaxis#lords in black#time bastard#npmd#nerdy prudes must die#tgwdlm#the guy who didn't like musicals#nightmare time#hatchetfield#hatchetverse#dee speaks
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Paz: “Look this shiny guy is a piece of shit. And his kid is weird. And don’t even get me started on this princess bitch. But this guy.. he’s MY piece of shit. And this kid is one of us even tho idk how his weird ass ears are gonna go in a helmet. And this princess.. man i just gave up on my kid and she was like nah bruh let’s climb this mountain.. So let’s fucking go kill some pirates. This is the way.”
#star wars#paz vizsla#paz viszla#the mandalorian incorrect quotes#the mandolarian#din djarin#bo katan kryze#big blue#this man has so much hate#I swear I heard Din roll his fucking eyes#why did it sound metal#like how did he SOUND annoyed when he didn’t speak yet#you can’t convince me that they didn’t kick the shit out of each other as kids#why is this man so large#as big as a mythosaur#the mandalorian#he’s so fucking hot#big blue bastard
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“Aside from TGWDLM (and a brief BF cameo), Ted Spankoffski has long hair and we as a fandom need to represent that more often within our fanworks, ” I say into the mic.
The crowd boos. I begin to walk off in shame when a voice speaks and commands silence from the room.
“They’re right,” he says. I look for the owner of the voice. There in the 5th row stands: Joey Richter himself, with long hair.
#‘what’s your source that Ted has long hair’? you ask. Joey personally told me in a cameo /gen#am I really spreading propaganda if I’m speaking the truth?#Did I use to draw Ted exclusively with short hair? yes. Have I been enlightened since then? yes. I will lead this crusade if needbe#just remember if your drawing long haired ted with his hair down that you don’t draw it too long or it ends up as scrags#I had multiple people ask me why I draw ted with long hair that I resorted to making a diagram#ted spankoffski#theodore spankoffski#starkid#team starkid#starkid productions#starkid fanart#fanart starkid#time bastard#starkid time bastard#time bastard nightmare time#tgwdlm#tgwdlm starkid#tgwdlm fanart#the guy who didn't like musicals#the guy who didn’t like musicals fanart#hatchetfield ape man#Workin boys#nightmare time#hatchetfield nightmare time#nmt#hatchetfield#hatchetverse#hatchetfield universe#fanart#my art
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Haunted by the horrors
#his mustache looks like he speaks for the trees#he probs would#Me bein a try hard again#digital art#then down from heaven came the banana fingers#digital drawing#art#I will try my best to hold my tongue on the complaints I have haha#Hatchetfield#starkid#homeless man#or is it#homeless guy#nightmare time#time bastard#Tinky#t’noy karaxis#ted spankoffski#fanart
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The bizly character formula is thus: First of all a past that they drag around with them like stones on their feet, a burden that is so impactful on them that it's also an intrinsic part of them, inseparable from who they are. second of all abandonment issues, or familial issues. then you make them at least a bit of an asshole, if not outright morally....questionable. AND you gotta throw in at least a little bit of soul crushing guilt over something or other at some point. generally they are also greasy little pathetic bastards who always end up being at least a little bit queer. I am right.
#pleaseeee ask me for examples if you want them.#also keep in mind that im referring pretty much just to JRWI here--i wasnt thinking ab the scu at all while writing this#also ive only seen:#jrwi riptide#jrwi bitb#jrwi apotheosis#jrwi the suckening#and those last two i havent finished yet#blood in the bayou#the suckening#bitb#jrwi#chip jrwi#jrwi thanatos#timothy rand#shilo bathory#shilo bathroy#shilo jrwi#chip bastard#bizly#bizlychannel#i speak
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i know tell yall about my last act of bastardness in high school
my high schools classroom doors have codes for them so you need the code to open the room
i memorised a many of these codes
i sent them to anyone i knew still in high school and told them to spread the word
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kidnapper-simon riley headcannons
tw/cw: obviously kidnapping, bondage, intoxication, dead dove: do not eat, punishments non/dub-con.
simon riley isn't some sweet, kindhearted angel that would sacrifice the world for you — he tries to be, but he's so worn down and insane that he can't help but lash out and punish you for the smallest of things, from accidentally spilling something, or arguing back.
he gets selfish gratification and pleasure when he's punishing you. he adores the sight of your skin, all bruised and covered in rope burn, your pretty body bare and revealed to him. he strips you of your dignity immediately, because regardless, it'll be stolen from you eventually if it wasn't taken immediately.
he's selfish, he does this for his own needs. he's greedy, and he's aware. simon doesn't even allow you to see his face, just a plain black balaclava covering his face. he loves it, being anonymous, able to make you feel vulnerable and scared as you're unaware and frightened by whatever is hiding behind the mask. simon loves it; he loves when you look into his eyes past the mask while you're locked into the cage, all teary-eyed, sulking and shaking, goosebumps covering your skin.
he takes you because he needs an outlet, for his frustration and sexual needs. you're a nuisance to simon, but god, you fulfill his needs so well when you're all drugged up and intoxicated. doing whatever is asked of you obediently.
“attagirlll... you’r learnin’ so fast, pretty doll.” he chuckles, the hoarse and gravelly sound sending shivers down your spine.
he keeps his hand on the back of your neck, holding your head down as he thrusts and ruts into you. simon isn't delusional; he's more than aware that this is illegal, brutal and cruel for him to do. he's so stoic and cold, that there's no point in building a relationship with a man as horrid as simon.
“feel too-.. too full, si--...”
you pant out, the feeling of him brutalizing your hole, raw and sensitive as he pumps himself into your slicken, drooling cunt. you're a complete, sobbing, broken mess; weak, useless, with your only purpose being to serve simon.
each thrust burns, and he doesn't hold back. he grips the back of the collar around your neck, tugging it firmly and forcing your back against his chest. he grinds into you, his mask lifted over his lips as he kisses down your neck in a sickly sweet, twisted way of loving on you. with his eyes wide and blown out, simon takes slow, hard thrusts, ramming into you slowly. you're so drunk and high, unable to form a proper sentence without crying or stuttering.
the feeling of his fat, heavy balls pressed against your cunt is agonisingly, and the tightening, choking sensation caused by him holding your collar tightly feels restrictive. you pant, breathing out, spitting and slobbering over yourself as you desperately try to breathe, gasping when he lets go, pushing you down onto your hands and knees and slamming into you while spanking and slapping your ass with his leather belt, the texture of his jeans against the backs of your bare thighs painful to your sensitive bruises.
your only purpose is to tease him and take his thick cock well, a slave held captive and bound with ropes.
#orla speaks#why isn't he real 😔😔#simon would be so brutal and a total bastard to his pretty captive <33#he'd be such a great kidnapper :3#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley smut#ghost call of duty#cod ghost#ghost headcanon#ghost mwii#ghost x reader#tw: noncon#tw: dubcon#tw: dark content#dead dove do not eat#tw: cnc#cnc kidnapping
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if your coffee goes cold, what do you do?
pour it out and make a new cup
microwave it and then drink it
just drink it cold anyway
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magical girl transformation where glitter and light appears and you're lifted up into the air and when you come back down everything is exactly the same except you're forklift certified
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and yet we continue
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star wars Barry B Benson be like "ya like jizz?"
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we keep telling the same stories over and over
#bastard speaks#poll#the vibe is death and what we become after#dishonored 2#the haunting of hill house#midnight mass#doctor sleep#ParaNorman#mike flanagan#neil gaiman#stephen king
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this is a cat chain, reblog with a cat pic (or don't <3)
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