#aspects and im trying to better understand the issues with all of this and why its all bad and stuff | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mommyownsmee · 3 months

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how can i be a better domme to my partner? i have no experience and am nervous about trying to domme. they're into praise and degradation too and im not good at that

Being a good Domme starts in your own mind. You can‘t be a good Domme unless you understand the psychology of submission and why your Sub wants to be submissive and why you have the need to be dominant.

First you have to find out what you like and what you don‘t like. What do you want and what are your no-go‘s?

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You always have to remind yourself that BDSM and every session is for both of you. A part of your role as a Domme is to nurture your Sub into someone who is comfortable with her sexuality, and being able to enjoy everything that she wants to do and feel without feeling guilty about it.

Some Subs are completely at ease with sex, their bodies and their fantasies. Others have issues with all or some of those topics. As a good Domme you must understand and accept this and not push their boundaries.

There is a Domme code I once did read and I still think it’s perfect to remember in every situation: „Leave your Sub better than you found her.“

Of course you’re not her therapist, but you can do your part to make her feel great about sex and BDSM.

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Whenever a Sub comes to you as a Domme, you have to be able to quickly gauge where she lies on the submissive spectrum. This means you need to find out: What does she need in the first place, what does she want, etc.

I know this sounds complicated for someone without any experience, but you‘ll learn it after some time.

Just listen to your girl. She will tell you what she needs and wants. Your job is to fulfill those needs. Don't assume your own way is right. Often it is not. Always talk to your Submissive, never only do what you want.

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As I began to be a Domme myself, l've been learning how to present myself strong and dominant. This taught me that showing them that you can be strong and brutal is way more powerful as a turn on than being actively brutal with them.

Don’t believe you have to shout to make your Sub do something for you. I almost never raise my voice. A raised voice indicates annoyance, aggression and loss of control – everything that is the opposite of being a calm and in control Domme. Often a quieter voice is far more effective. As an example, suppose your Sub answers back. An eyebrow raise and an ��Excuse me?” said quietly whilst maintaining eye contact with her works wonders.

You don't have to be brutal and treat your girl aggressively to be a Domme. Being a Dominant is not about aggression, manipulation or abuse.

You won’t always get your own way. In fact, being the Domme in the relationship often equals more work, because you now have to look after two people (yourself and your Sub). As much as she is there to serve and attend to your needs, you must attend to hers and not take advantage of her eagerness to please without giving her back anything in return.

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Some more tips:

Whether you are a beginner or professional Dom, you are never going to get it right all the time. Make light of your mistakes and your Sub will too.

There’s no need to be heavy and intense all the time. You don’t have to approach this with the solemnity of a politician delivering bad news. If your personality is naturally jovial and light-hearted then incorporate that into your play. Laugh and have fun with your sub.

Being a good Domme does not mean you have to enjoy all aspects of BDSM. I don’t like inflicting pain, for example, and I’m not that into leather. Does that make me a bad Domme? No. Don’t try and do everything. Learn what you and your partner enjoy and stick to that.

Everything you do should be consensual. Never force someone to do something they do not want to do or is going to cause long term physical or emotional harm. Remember the principle of Safe, Sane and Consensual (SSC) at all times.

Not owning up to mistakes. If you make a mistake, admit it and apologise if necessary. There’s a real strength in being able to admit your flaws.

It’s wrong to demand submission too soon. Some Dominants expect their partner or date to be submissive right from the off. This isn’t how it works. You must earn her submission. A Sub must respect and trust you before she is willing to submit to you. Don’t be the dumbass who starts ordering someone around on a first date.

Expecting submission outside the bedroom. Not all submissives (or dominants) enjoys submitting in everyday life, and you shouldn’t expect them to. Some subs want to be treated roughly during sex, but return to an equal power status afterwards. Some want an unequal power dynamic 24 hours a day.

If you aren’t clear in communicating your desires, or make your rules too complicated, or haven’t written them down, you can’t expect your Sub to follow them. Consider writing a BDSM contract for clarity.

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Execute your dominance slowly but progressively, learning where her and your boundaries are. Don‘t overstep them ever.

When you both have set your boundaries, respect them, but (of course depending on the situation/person/kind if boundary) play with balancing just on the edge. You could end up pushing their boundaries and either make her and you feel bad or make you both enjoy it in the end. You definitely have to talk to your Sub before doing anything.

Definitely talk after every session in great extent. No matter if it was a session over 5 minutes or 5 hours. Have your Sub tell you every detail they liked and didn't like, what they thought you could do better, etc.

In the same way, tell them how you felt.

Trust your Sub. She is a grown woman and more than capable of telling you if she believes you are taking advantage of her or if you‘re doing everything right.

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Find a mentor, someone who knows a lot about BDSM and is in the scene for a long time already and ask them all your questions. Ask them for help if you need.

Try to talk to many Dommes before you settle for one. Get a wide spectrum of answers, verify those answers against one another and as you find a trustworthy mentor, listen to how the answers from other places differs from theirs.

Experienced kink folk are the ones that have already screwed up and carry the scars from it. Learn from their scars instead of making that same mistake yourself.

Become a member of the community. Find out who is good and what makes them good. Who is bad at it and what makes them bad.

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Your Sub should know it's your first time domming. If you mess up, it's entirely okay to laugh about it. No shame, you're learning. You will feel more confident if you can laugh about it.

If you are not having fun, don't be afraid to say „Ok, this isn't working“ or „I'd prefer if we do this and this and this instead right now, want to change the plan?“.

Never change plans without bringing up a solution and ask that if your Sub has a complaint, that she comes with a solution following her complaint. This is so you aren't left feeling like all the responsibilities are on you.

This helps not break the Sub from their state of mind, it makes you dominant and handle the scene. It also leaves a space for the Sub to negotiate these new terms without breaking characters.

If no one is having fun, you both aren't doing it right and are probably just not compatible. Be honest, speak your mind, trust your partner as much as they trust you.

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Not everything you read online will suit you. Don’t think you have to do something just because another Domme is doing it.

For example, if you don’t like spanking, don’t do it. It doesn’t make you less of a Domme.

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Since it's your first time, make sure your Sub knows that you might need aftercare as a Domme too, but that you might not know what you need yet. Some people like to cuddle in silence, some like to talk about it all and others like me needs a shower right after sex. Don't be ashamed of not knowing what you want, but make sure you can voice it out as you go.

I recommand for you both to take the bdsmtest.org before you start domming. It will help you find out more about yourself and your Sub.

Afterwards, you should read a lot about the kinks that were shown you as the most compatible.

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A Mommy Domme exhibit caregiving tendencies and enjoy the softer, more tender qualities of caring for someone else. They are often paired with Littles and provide a motherly type figure or role model to guide their Sub. Mommy Dommes and little girl dynamics are often referred to as MDLG (Mommy Domme Little Girl) or CLG (Caregiver Little Girl).

A sadist Domme enjoys inflicting pain on her submissive, who is referred to as a masochist (or a „pain slut“, if she is not offended by that language). The sadist Domme will be interested in bondage, spanking, flogging and perhaps even inflicting pain during sexual activity. A sadist Domme may also enjoy humiliating or degrading her submissive through words, during sex, or when punishing her.

A Lady Domme is paired with a slave or service-orientated submissive. In this style of Domme and Sub dynamic the Lady treats her Submissive as property, and they engage in sexual and non-sexual play. For example, the Submissive might be responsible for maintaining the household, cooking dinner, or being a sexual plaything for the Lady Domme to enjoy. They might engage in slave training where the Submissive learns what the Lady Domme enjoys and how to perform her duties.

An owner Domme may refer to ownership for a submissive slave, but may also refer to owning a Submissive who enjoys acting like a pet. During pet play the Domme would serve the Sub food from a bowl on the floor, wear a collar and sleep in a cage.

A Caregiver/romantic Domme enjoys nurturing her Sub. She helps her achieve her goals and may be involved in making choices in her life such as what clothes she wears and what she eats.

A financial Domme controls the money of her submissive.

A rigger Domme enjoys rope either for the appeal of seeing her Sub tied up and restrained or simply for the beautiful ropework.

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The thing that changes degrading from an act of bullying to a source of pleasure is context and consent. Sex and real life are not the same. The difference between what you are comfortable with in the bedroom versus in a real life or public scenario entirely depends on consent and the element of choice.

The understanding that consent is key to incorporating degrading should not be taken lightly. In order for everyone involved to feel safe and find pleasure from degradation, there needs to be regular talks about limits, boundaries, and what you want to gain from the scene. In the heat of the moment, it can be easy for a degradation scene to be taken too far, even with one simple comment or act.

Due to this, it is essential to have advanced planning before attempting any act of degradation. Safewords should also be established, allowing anyone in the scene to give the warning to slow down or stop the scene completely if needed. All parties need to express what they are and are not comfortable with doing or saying. Someone may express that they want to have certain parts of their bodies insulted, but the other person involved may not be comfortable saying these insulting terms. That is absolutely okay but should be discussed prior to the scene. Everyone involved is allowed to have boundaries, and they need to be respected.

The intention behind degrading is to bring intense feelings of humiliation or embarrassment, and because of the emotions that can stem from this, aftercare is a must. Aftercare provides reassurance and affirmation, creating a feeling of safety and respect that was not present during the degrading scene.

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On the complete opposite spectrum to degradation, some Subs find arousal from praise. There is nothing some Submissives love more than positive reinforcement. Whilst praise can be verbal, there can be physical elements incorporated. A pat on her head or a kiss on her forehead can be just as good as a verbal affirmation. When giving out compliments, make sure to be sincere in your praises. Half-hearted compliments will be noticed, and your goal of making your Sub feel appreciated will not be reached.

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Some Submissives are into both degrading and praise, which is totally alright. The thing is: You need to talk with your Sub beforehand about her boundaries and what exactly she wants to hear and what not. Are there words that trigger bad feelings in your Sub? Are there things that do the opposite?

To use praise and degradation in one sentence, combine a praise with an „insult“. For excample it could be: „You‘re my pretty slut.“ or „Your cunt is already molded into the shape of my strap, and you look so perfect- fucked out like this, baby.“

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royal-they · 2 years

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I feel like a lot of people don’t realize how important it is for people to see ships like lumity and huntlow coming from a brand like disney that’s known for having ships that really is known to enforce a lot of beauty standards on to kids.

lumity is definitely not “on brand” with disney but i feel like so much of the appeal in it comes from that fact. luz doesn’t fit disneys standards for an attractive girl at all. (she is very pretty tho don’t get me wrong) whereas amity is definitely seen by a lot of fans to be very attractive and i think that makes the ship even more powerful. luz doesn’t fall for amity first, amity falls for luz.

i don’t think i can even explain how much this meant to me as a poc. like omg the hot gay witch that everyone thinks is super hot falls for the dorky brown girl??? that alone makes me love the ship 1000x more. its amazing that kids get to grow up with a ship like that that really flips tropes and cliches and is still so fun and cute to watch. it really teaches young bisexuals and pocs that; hey! you can totally find a super loving healthy relationship where the other person respects you :) ive mentioned in the past that i used to feel really self conscious of my lips but luz helped my overcome that. it’s a small but very important thing to me. i also used to always be worried about how partners would take me being bi, again luz was so helpful in overcoming that fear.

huntlow is another ship that i feel is incredibly important for reasons similar to lumity. a lot of people are probably going to hate me for saying that lmao but idk i still think it’s very likely to become canon. again like lumity the character the fandom finds to be the most attractive falls first

some people say that willow fell first but I feel like given the fact that hunters been the only one who blushes a lot more people are gonna go “oh hunter likes willow” rather than “willow likes hunter” (i mean i think willow likes hunter but it’s not as obvious so im not gonna talk about that aspect of this ship and it’s not relevant to the point im trying to get across.)

a lot of people have also said that huntlow parallels lumity in how lot in how their interactions are written and i really agree with that. hunter has from the minute his face was revealed always been seen as attractive by the fandom. i feel like people only really started saying the same about willow when hunter started showing signs of having a crush on her.

willow like luz isn’t the conventionally attractive disney princess type. she’s larger, east asian, and more quiet. still through hunters perspective we’re able to see these aspects of her along with how she can still be confident and an incredibly powerful witch.

just like with lumity the show allows people to stop and be like huh luz is actually really pretty and super cute or huh willow is actually really gorgeous and talented. we’re able to see these characters from the perspective of the people who are in love with them.

at first amity and hunter both don’t really understand why willow and luz are the way they are. hunter and amity have been raised with the perspective of having to be better than everyone all the time so when they meet luz and willow - two very powerful witches - they dont understand why they’re approaching things with the perspective they have. but slowly they’re able to see a different side of them which in turn allows the viewer to also understand luz and willow more.

we see hunter and amity have this moment of realization; huh it’s actually okay to let people see a more friendly side of myself that’s more open with people and that doesn’t take anything away from how powerful i have the capability of being.

I think that just the fact alone that luz is able bring out the best side of amity and the fact that willow is able to bring out the best side of hunter is really cute and admirable. these two standoffish teens with self hatred issues are just are suddenly super soft around these two super sweet cute girls. idk i just really like these two ships.

#toh #the owl house #toh spoilers #lumity #huntlow #willow park #luz noceda #amity blight #hunter toh #lumity toh #huntlow toh #winter toh #character analysis #god this is like a really unprofessional essay lol #oh well

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aroanthy · 5 months

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thinking about nanami and touga both telling utena not to trust anthy at the end of the series. whilst nanami and anthy being friends is something that makes me bawl like a little baby and overjoys me immensely, ive never bought a reading of nanami post-32 that is anthy positive. like idk how you could get that impression when all she does is talk about how anthy is a terrible and dangerous person. she’s scared of her. and you know she shouldn’t be, but it’s understandable why a 13 year old living in ohtori academy might be scared of someone she already didn’t like after finding out something deeply traumatic regarding them and not having the tools to make sense of it in a compassionate way. and it makes me want to eat drywall

what’s really interesting about all this to me tho is how both kiryuus tell utena not to trust ‘the chairman/end of the world or himemiya anthy/the rose bride’. anthy and akio are a package deal of toxicity and harm to both of them and if that isn’t just the most fascinating thing ever. also the difference between nanami’s ‘chairman/himemiya’ and touga’s ‘end of the world/rose bride’ (nanami giving her warning during the badminton scene, touga giving his at the end of his duel. so much going on here wrt roles and settings and rituals and reality). but getting back to my real point isn’t it so cool (agonising) how nanami and touga are incapable of extending compassion or understanding to anthy despite the fact that they’re the two people who know the most about her other than utena and akio. and like. they don’t know a Lot, but theyve both had a smidge of insight into an abusive relationship that mirrors aspects of their own lives in myriad ways

idk something about the rose bride as a symbol who bears all of humanity’s hatred. and in the end all girls are like the rose bride yes, but key word here is like. an approximation; all trapped, all agonised, yes, but not all literally fucking crucified for eternity by a million swords that shine with human hatred. not abstracted in such a particular and insidious way. i always find anthy/kiryuu parallels compelling wrt issues of race and class and mannnnnn. nanami takes a step away from the duelling game. she’s not out, but she’s not actively partaking, not actively being exploited. touga, whilst a little more overtly involved in stuco business and still meeting with akio, does also take a step away. like, they’re both able to do that. it’s a bit of an artifice, sure, they’re still here, but oh my god oh my god oh my god. theyre not anthy. am i making sense can anyone hear me holy shit

i think what im trying to say is that for everything that both nanami and touga learn about ohtori academy and the people living in it, for everything that forces them to self-reflect and question the ground that they stand upon, they fail to break the chain with it. like, they too contribute to anthy’s abstraction. she’s an idea that they secretly embody/emulate (not sure which word works better for what im trying to say just yet), and not a person who shares experiences with them but is still wholly separate from them. this kind of compassion is like. it’s too hard, when you’re in the situations that all three of them are in. anthy too perceives both of them as nonhuman, but there is a crucial power dynamic at play here. how can you stomach such a kindness to someone you can only see as a poor imitation of the worst parts of yourself, whom you loathe??

^ THIS GUY loves it when characters commit acts of extreme violence against one another that they themselves have experienced. the nanamianthytouga brand

#big ramble tldr i am compelled by stabbing. lots of it. of the self and others (which are muddled by your misperceptions)#yum yum yum #dais.txt #obfuscation abventures

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uchihaharlot · 4 days

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im in LITTERAL obito hell. Can i please get hcs for obito w total sub fem s/o. God, i really need therapy bc how much i need a man like him 😭

Nonny,

We all are in Obito hell, especially when he's balls deep slapping your ass to the rhythm of your moaning.

Obito is a weird mix of a sub/dom himself, he’s going to need to be shown the ropes, idk why but he's aggressive in a tender way. 🙈🙊😇

NSFW; both y'all getting fucked stupid; there is no way around it; Obito likes to be owned too; (lightly edited because its late asf.)

It’s kinda cute actually. 🥹 His s/o is such a patient woman!! Has no issues with forcing his aggression on her. But HOLY, once Obito is in charge.

Babygirl, you're fucked. In every sense of the word. He's not super fond of tying you up because he really likes when your nails dig into his skin. Obito, bless his little Uchiha heart, can't really feel much on his right side due to nerve damage. So you can freely bite and claw your way up his arm and throat. For the love of god, leave those delectable red marks in the shape of your lips. Hickey's are his love language, and Obito won't hesitate to consensually leave you a handprinted necklace. A testament to how a bit you both are unruly and unhinged in the heated throes of sex.

He's so shy, but easily warms up to it. Especially when you look that gorgeous stuffed with his cock in your mouth. He loves loves loves when you hum from the base of his shaft and up to his tip, sucking there just a little harder than the rest of him. Please press a kiss there too every so often, the tender aspect of it makes him whine. You sucking him as the slut he's always needed just drives him bonkers, and may make him cum fast. And that's usually embarrassing for some men, but when you both are really in the mood for one another...this is just the starting line. You haven't even been stretched around him properly.

His absolute favorite thing is overstimulation. For both of you, he particularly enjoys cock warming in your mouth until he's hard and ready again. It goes without saying, but most Uchiha have a really quick refresh rate (breeding kink checking in). And, this is just my two cents, I love all the Uchiha men, but Obito is built like a damn semi truck, ok? Cock, balls and fuck if I don't love good thighs on a man. Powerful enough to just keep going and going and going... So have your fun now, because you're getting railed faster than the 'midnight train to anywhere.' Your pussy will be crying and raw by the end of the next two hours.

Obito might not even go soft if he's sucked deep enough in your throat. The muscles in the back milk him so damn good. Of course Obito's ideal woman swallows his cum whole, but he understands if you didn't like it coming out your nose like last time. Regardless, once he's been worked good enough, you better grip the sheets and expect to be flipped on your stomach. I truly believe that Obito's favorite position is face down, ass up. He loves to see you shudder and writhe, how each thrust ricochets through your lithe frame.

It gives him the most intimate view of his beautiful cock filling you too, seeing how deliciously you swell around his girth that first thrust in. You being a whimpering mess is an added bonus, even if you try to be quiet, you're not. Not really. Probably don't even remember half the shit you moan out when he's busy fucking you this way.

'Gods Obi...just like that..' or 'Please, I need to cum.' He really enjoys edging you, and then once he does allow you to cum, fucks you into oblivion until you can't stand it anymore.

His large palm pressing your face into the mattress as you stare up at him with glazed eyes, his other hand gripping your ass. He's not thrusting himself into you, he's thrusting you over his cock. The perfect little sleeve, and you glide so easy over him. In and out, the delicate tap tap tap of his cock head against your sensitive cervix just is so good, you cum so fast within the few minutes of being conquered this way. He doesn't mean it if it hits too hard, his cock is just that divine and long. Several orgasms leave you drenching his shaft, but Obito is far from cumming fast this time.

Expect to be thrown into every position known to mankind, and ending with every Uchiha males favorite. The mating press. Oh it's so so so hot, looking into those dark onyx eyes this way. He's incredibly one of the best Uchiha to watch when they cum. His eyes gleam with the impending orgasm that makes his cock twitchy and thicker. Hand at your throat, squeezing every time he feels the dull throb of your pussy sucking his cock in more and more. Each gentle swell of your overused walls reverberates up and down his aching need.

'That's right babygirl, you love to cum all over me.' and all you can do it moan more, words are beside your minds ability to function other than thinking about how full you are.

I know this is supposed to be a dominate situation for you guys, but Obito can't help but be a tender dom. Asking you if you're gonna cum all over his cock again, begging you to cum with him. You both are babbling little fucked out idiots here. And the moment that throb in the depths of your cunt shoots through you, making the both of you pant over each other's mouths. His hand tightens around your throat the second you moan his name for the hundredth time tonight, that undeniable sound of gratification and satisfaction as you cum hard all over his cock. Shaking, twitching and incapable of breathing due to his grip. Adding another layer of your juices to his balls and thighs, the bed is a damn lake from the two of you and it probably is reaching up your back now.

A final groan in your neck as you feel your orgasm coaxing his to fruition. Obito is a softie when he finally cums, it's just so hot to him when you want him to use you this way. Its the best offering for a man who was deprived of basic human touch. Being milked for all that he is worth in the most beautiful manner. SO much better than all those solo years as a 'handy man.' His cum, like most Uchiha, is thick and warm. Coats your insides and each subsequent thrust thereafter your mutual climaxes causes some of it to seep out around your raw opening.

The time you two take to come down and actually gather your senses is euphoric. Obito traces your skin, and rubs your aching thigh muscles when he finally sits up.

All in all, he's down to please you however. Maybe next time he'll wear that mask you always ask about...

#uchiha clan #uchiha headcanons #obito uchiha #uchiha obito #obito headcanons #obito x reader

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hazshit-hotel-hater · 2 months

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Ok a rant about Cerri bomb and how much I HATE her

In the addict music video she was a very supportive friend of Angel and I loved her in the pilot! I wish we got that supportive best friend to Angel in the final product, but unfortunately she is a woman in a vivziepop show.

She’s AWFUL now I can’t stand her, the way she tried to make Angel relapse was so weird like pilot cherri wouldn’t do that! I also really dislike her design it has to be one of my personal least favourites (not the bottom though nothing is worse than alastors design to me) she isn’t enjoyable to watch anymore she had potential if she’d only been introduced earlier! Imagine if she was introduced in episode 4 and played the supportive friend she was originally supposed to be!

And GOD I hate her ship with pentious, it was SO RUSHED, so poorly done and the ship isn’t very “so cute and in love!!” When you remember she showed literally NO interest in him until Angel brought up that he has 2 dicks, and this is supposed to be a romantic relationship we CARE about.

Cherri didn’t need a romantic relationship she needed CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT we needed to get to know her! If you’ve only seen the show and no other Hazbin media at all (which shouldn’t be required you should be able to get all your info FROM THE SHOW) you’d barely know anything about her character or who she is. I wish we got pilot cherri bomb, and that she got a design update, and that her and pent’s relationship was either taken slower or didn’t happen at all

You silly little creature you, you have me writing in my notes app instead of Tumblr because I’m about to go crazy!

Cherri Bomb. More like Cherri what the hell happened

Anyway I’m gonna tackle this one thing at a time, and also forgive me if I word something weird I just woke up an hour ago at the time of writing this.

First thing, design: I personally quite like her design since it very loosely reminds me of Iris from Ruby Gloom with ofc the one eye, the very rowdy personality and kind of the hair, but those are very broad design choices and its just me remembering some random girl I thought was silly but like Iris did it better.

Okay now second thing and then we go into literally everything else: My blog has been an angry pit of despair for everything in Episode 6 as of recent so let’s tap into that again 🤏 just a little. I am going to give my classic centrist opinion and say I don’t mind Cherri Bomb all that much but I absolutely get why people dislike her, and I mean this in the kinda way as people who dislike… Idk Fukuchi from BSD. WILD jump in fandoms but gimme a second. I can’t 100% say that Cherri Bomb in the pilot was better than the series since we have no idea if maybe for some reason she was intended to be like that offscreen, but judging by the pilot and “Addict” alone, it’s very unlikely. I could see her maybe being a bad influence at times and being like “Loosen up dude we’re in hell and its Friday” or something (idk if they have Friday in hell but everyday is probably Monday 🥁) but overall I feel like she’d end up apologising for it. However on the other side of things, I can understand why Cherri did that in Episode 6. Of course not to say this is okay, but Cherri is still very clearly not in the “redemption” mindset. She’s happy the way she is and is really only focused on certain aspects of issues. We see her comfort Angel in “Addict” but thats basically the extent of it. Cherri’s definition of “self-care” seems to be less of actually taking care of yourself and more like just letting go and having fun instead which really only gives a momentary fix to the issue, much like how substances can be abused. Do you kinda see what im getting at? Cherri offering Angel drugs while he’s trying not to relapse is not okay, full stop. But her reasoning as to why makes a bit of sense for her purpose in the show which is honestly not much, since, as you said, she is a woman in a Vivziepop show.

To my knowledge Cherri is like 30-ish years younger than Angel Dust in Hell experience so she’s likely not reached a point where she’s gotten tired of how things work, as well as the fact we don’t really have much of an idea on her backstory aside from that random shot in “Addict” of that guy in a puddle??? But generally she seems to be in a better position than Angel is, so there isn’t really any reason for her to want to change, yknow? I will say I do like exploring characters that are good friends while still being bad influences at times, but I’m going to be honest I feel like thats really not what Angel needs right now. I wouldn’t be as pissy about it if she did end up apologising afterwards (I’m just gonna headcanon she did for my sanity) but even then as Angel’s friend we don’t know like… anything about her. I would’ve really liked to get some kind of callback to the pilot where Cherri mentions she thought Angel was dead until the random Sir Pentious turf war, and maybe we could see her actually being worried about Angel again instead of those 3 frames in “Addict”, but Hazbin is rushed and I guess we don’t have time for that. And also YES it would’ve been great to see her in Episode 4 and actually doing something but again, Vivziepop is boring.

Going forward I would really like to see Cherri, if not become a patron, at least try to be a better friend and sure if she wants to keep doing stuff she can keep doing it, but just don’t encourage other people to relapse. It is very simple.

SIR PENTIOUS! About Sir Pentious, this is going to be incredibly short. I don’t hate the ship but also I’m not really crazy about any of the Hazbin Hotel ships? I also don’t really hate any except for the genuinely horrid ones but thats basic sense. I absolutely agree with you, Cherri does not need a romantic interest. Romance doesn’t always = growth and growth should not always = romance. She needs some genuine character TLC and I hope to god she gets some in season 2. We’ve only seen a few minutes of her so I have yet to give a firm opinion, but as of now I’m just hoping they do something actually interesting with her instead of just alluding to Sir Pentious ship. Also the penis thing. 1. What was that, and 2. It made me and my friends briefly pause to sex Sir Pentious and come to the conclusion he is likely transgender/hj

TLDR; Please give us a fun Cherri Bomb again. ☹️

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valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn · 8 months

Note

https://gamerant.com/loki-season-2-mcdonalds-partnership-sylvie-details/

There's such an insanity in this. The fact they are taking this so seriously and expect the audience too as well. Like, people don't fondly look as product placement as something positive in movies and tv.

GotG works because stuff like 80 music and aesthetic is something that can be liked even if one doesn't have personal nostalgic attachment to it. And it is music, aesthetic and pop culture that people do form attachment to and keep in their lives.

For most McDonald is not some warm nostalgic experience people think of. It's thought of as cheap, unhealthy and more often than not poor quality food. No one attach is themselves to eat fast food chain like they attach themselves to their music. It doesn't inspire people like movies and tv can when writing their own stories.

Like, Wanda finding comfort in watching sitcoms is a thing people do. Sylvie finding comfort in working for a fast food chain is a joke and them taking it so seriously just makes even more of a joke

Yeah, it is kind of weird. You think maybe it's an American thing? Maybe they feel some kind of attachment to McDonald's for some reason, but I doubt the rest of the world gives a damn. It's just one of a million other fast-food joints that I particularly never go to. If I go fast-food, I'm buying pizza, baby.

I wasn't watching the MCU back then but did they make such a huge fuss about Stark eating a burger back in IM 2? It's like they're trying to convince the audience that this has a deeper meaning or something. Wanna give it an emotional angle? Do it in the script! The fact that they're trying to sell this so much and so repeatedly kind of makes me think they didn't do a good enough job of it in the episode and they're trying to cover their asses or something.

Anyway, Sylvie is not human. She could find those families with kids at a park or coming out of school, the McDonald's thing was done for marketing purposes and that's it.

I gotta say though, this part in that article is bothering me:

"The season 2 trailer indicated that he (Loki) is having an issue with time slippage, and there would be no individual better at understanding the problem than a person who spent her entire life hiding in the timelines."

Sylvie knows nothing about that. She didn't even know magic didn't work at the TVA. She's not some expert about timelines and time shenanigans, she was only at the TVA for a few minutes as a kid. Loki said in ep2 he had been watching videos regarding those aspects of timelines, etc so if anything... he knows a lot more than she does. But S2 is going to be more of the same, I'm afraid. Loki being clueless and Sylvie showing how much more than him she knows.

PS. Isn't this show supposed to be about him? Yet all articles I've seen talk about her. Why don't they change the title of the series? Oh right, it may not sell as well...

#loki negativity

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kaleidosouls · 8 months

Text

SU reclaimed pearl rambles

im gonna use some annoying comments i got on my reclaimed pearl as a springboard for what i think could be interesting discussion because i think its good to engage with criticism/different opinions. but also if you talk to me like an asshole i want you to fuck off and i promised i wouldnt engage in that kind of stuff bc its not good for me and it doesnt Look good for me either.

so i can talk about my thoughts but not engage directly, win win. its been months but im still really fond of the pearl i made specially this art. like it coudl be better but i like it well enough. just a little header so this isnt a boring post with only text

i think like, its good to establish ground rules that like, i think most of the poor reactions ive seen towards my art were missing, mostly in bad faith probably but in case theres ppl who earnestly want to understand. actually maybe i can format it like a little FAQ even though theyre not frequent or asked lskdjg just for outlining my points. ill put it behind a cut but ill frontline w this: if youre a fan of pearl in the show, this content is not for you. youre allowed to like whatever you want and so am i. if you like her, we probably wont get along and you probably will feel very personally irritated by how i FEEL about her, so just walk away now. im not gonna engage with petty shit taht juts boils down to 'im mad you dont like what i like'

onwards to more rambling / sorta responding to some criticism

i scrolled back and i guess i sorta never have actually done a proper full explanation post about this AU have i? or maybe i have and deleted it, i forgor

why did you change pearl?

because i hate her, simple as. i went from a huge SU fan to hating watching it (i did finish) and pearl is probably The biggest reason why, as like issues with her character seep into other aspects of the show that i also hate. like i mean i Realyl hate her. she makes the experience of watching the show really irritating and miserable for me. if you dont feel taht way about her thats totally normal and whatever but no one is gonna change my experience and feelings that i had watching SU since the 1st season was coming out.; anyway answering. there is a Lot i love about SU and want to engage with, so i had the idea of like,maybe ill just change pearl, cause i wanted to delete her, really, but she is one of the main characters and she hasa function as a character that you cant just do away with. essentially im just like, some guy, who draws, coping and trying to reclaim his teenage investimetn in this show. literally its just for ME. but if anyone else feels like i do, then they can enjoy it too. if somoene doesnt feel like i do, go watch like pearl fancams or smth. like ill never be able to literlaly change the show as it is, like its happened, and its a tragedy im trying to move on from (begrudgingly)

why do you hate pearl?

the long laundry list of reasons are probably apparent in the ways i remade her lol (theyre not i can tell ppl are gonna project whatever worst bad faith reason for any change i make) but tbh the core of it is this, which is like, beyond whatever traits she has and whatever: she reminds me of my abusers. always had, from season 1, but like it became worse as the series went on. its like really infurating and upsetting to watch SU bc of her. had my abusers been a different kind of person, maybe i wouldnt hate her so much (kinda doubt tbh). like her personality and behavior are like hough disgosting!!

why did you change (some physical trait about her design)?

i dont really necessarily have a PROBLEM with canon pearls design. over the years ive come to like SU's style less and less but like, gestures, whatever. like i didnt like it or anything but its not like a bit deal compared to the actual offender that is her personality and behavior. the reason i redesigned her at all is bc like, if i hadnt, i would still be thinking about the way she is in canon all the time. like ive visually associated her like, appearance with all the shit about her thta makes me upset so i had to so she didnt look like the same person anymore, and i can try to let go of some of the hatred in my heart. like i want to think about the thigns about SU that i loved and also the potential i always saw in it and canon pearl is like, an active obstacle to that, to the point taht i cant even see her without getting like irked. i tried to keep enough similar traits so from a glance youd be like, who the fuck- is that pearl? rather than like. completely change her entirely to whatever i wanted. i do want to like, its a creative exercise. i want to try and change the things that would make me happy to see gone but try to work within the constraints of the SU we Did get as much as i can tolerate. bc like.... if the sky was the limit then at this poin wed just have to throw the whole thing away and start from scratch. like its kinda not really very salvageable, like im not rewirting SU to be like a Good show or fix Everything, its kinda too broken. im just chnaging enough so i can look at the actual show, screenshots, songs etc, and not feel overcome wtih like the grief and irriatation of how much it sucked ass. its just so i can enjoy more of it again

i dont like your redesign for (insert reason)

cool. thanks for your input. youre welcome! eat my asshole. seriously though, like, shrugs. i didnt make it for anyone other than myself. tbh im not fully satisfied with it either bc i think the SU style is kinda ugly, so im at a crossroads. should i mostly abandon the SU style? ive like, tested out tweaking things, it mightve been noticeable in screenshot redraws. drawing within the SU style is to create that coping 'oh it was totally like this haha' vibe but maybe im old enough to not need that anymore lol. like ive heard ppl say shit like shes ugly, or like sneakily trying to imply im like, got some agenda over beauty or racism etc. like whatever, think whatever you want, its not for you. go back to sucking up to rebecca or smth like i cant take the og pearl away from you still i am open for like that kind of criticism like, do i have personal biases affecting my design decisions? probably. i do try to keep aware of why im choosing certain things, but really in this case i cant emphasize enough how like, irritating it is that i have to change her design at all. like its hard to come up w smth else when the rest of the cast ahs already been design to balance off the og pearl. i probably wouldnt change almost anything if the sight of her didnt piss me the fuck off! most of all i kinda wouldve preferred to keep her hair short bc it messes up the sillouete but it makes me think too much of canon pearl so i made it long :/ i was like let me tell you my design thought process: -im gonna try to keep as many recognizable traits about her design while taking away bit by bit until she doesnt look like the og pearl to me anymore and i dont feel angry seeing her. pearl is lanky, tall, spindly, with a gem on the forehead, blue white pink yellow pastel colors, large pointed nose. i kinda tried to keep these traits while slightly tweaking their design until she looked different enough. is it a good design? eh idk. like the purpose is to make me not hate her and it does that job

now this hate comment im gonna grace with keeping it intact except removing the person bc its not about them. its like, a very stupid ass headed comment but im actually kind of interested in like,jumping off of it to ponder some things

im not heterosexual or cis enough to know what exactly wife bate means in this context so im gonna like guess, that maybe i could extract this q from that reply (also not looking like shes from steven universe is a compliment thanks)

you took away her personality and made her boring

the only thing i can assume is that like, some people must interpret the absence of an assholey personality or like abusive behavior is 'boring'. i know thats a really bad faith assumption but like, if ive written down a bunch of personality traits and you still come out saying thats 'no personality' what am i to make of that lol. based on my experience like Existing online, people tend to often call nice characters 'boring', like dude ive done it before, but i think im kinda over that edgy phase. also again, its for me and not for you so if you think shes boring, thanks for your input i dont care. but thinkign about it earnestly, i dfeintely dont want to make a character thats just no flaw and not interesting ofc, i havent done that with reclaimed pearl. that being said i havent like, probably written a lot demonstrating what i want her to be like instead of the canon pearl so, maybe ppl just are feeling lost with the lack of information.

personally, if i hear someone thinks a character is boring bc theyre not abusive anymore like, nothing of value has been lost. but characters do need flaws in order to create conflict and cause things to happen, like in a way canon pearl is like All flaw, which wouldnt be a problem except she gets away wtih all the horrible shit she did. heres some traits i want to explore with reclaimed pearl, some are similar to canon i just wanna go about it a different way: being overprotective/possessive to steven in a smothering way, projecting abandonment issues, not reaching out/communicating her emotions properly, lacking indepedence/self worth, depending on others to avoid confronting her own issues, being very passive and insecure and lacking initiative (this being the totally opposite trait that canon pearl has), stunting stevens development due to her not being ready for him to grow up and not need her anymore. and more, this is just from the top of my head. maybe thats still too 'boring' for ppl because shes not being selfish and inconsiderate enough to others so you can relate to her but i dont care :p

gosh how do i go about like, presenting the content i ahve in my head for this AU).. i cantjust remake the whole damn show. i would if i could, tbh

i have concerns about racist implications wrt (insert thing here about my redesign)

imma be frank. i dont know how to compltely 'clean up' any possible bad associations wrt pearl as a character given how like, rebecca has literally like, made her to be a slave in love with her slave owner and made it to be like, an uwu ideal lesbiab thing for most of the show until they tried to pretend no we understood the flaws in this dynamic all along and its bad actually , uhh, anyway shows over haha

ill say the main reason i changed her skintone is, bc that would be the like most instant way to make her look differnt from canon (which is vital for me for the reasons said above), and i did consider like, does this make the whole thing worse, or, ?? like, as they made it in the show, techincally All the gems are slaves to the diamonds, arent they? including all the very totally progressive poc based gems including and specially the ones who are made to be understood as black women. bruh like idk what to tell you this show is just fuckig bad sdlgkj like its just way too like, pervasive in my teen years forme to throw the baby w the bathwater entirely. and ill just straight up say it, like, im not a specialist on these topics nor do i hav ea position of authority to speak on about it. like the pearls read more clearly as slaves (very intentionally by the showrunners) bc they are meant to be subservient to gems Other than diamonds. and also bc they like fit in the stereotype of housemaid servant. like the rubies being made to just be forced to go and fight like they are slaves too, they have no rights and no like, authority to disobey or autonomy. but fsr like, slavery as in physical labor just doesnt immeidately set off ppls alarms as much as housework slavery does fsr.

i can only rly like change the canon so much and try to like, tweak things so it doesn feel as gross but i think for it to be cmpletely not insneistive at all youd have to throw away the whole show. and like i said, this isnt like me saying like im making the show good or as it shouldve been, im making it so I (and ppl who share my feelings about the show) can feel less shitty just thinking back to it. its just an exercise. im not like mass media im just one independent artist and shit will come out insensitve sometimes and im sorry but im also like, my art isnt meant to be representative and like, responsiuble for fixing all of society and racism like i actually cant do that. ill just do the best i can as an asian dude but like, if my work makes you upset, im sorry, but also just block me. like i cant please everyone. or like, even better, make YOUR take on pearl taht you feel would be better, like make the art you feel should exist.

this post is too damn long and id be surprised if anyone reads all of it but if you do, tahnk you! i felt kinda like ready to fight tonight so im triyng to redirect it from aggression to like, thinking. i cant guarantee im making new content for su reclaimed anytime soon but i would really like to, tbh

#su critical #steven universe reclaimed #ranting whatever blah blahb lah sdkjg

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mariacallous · 1 year

Note

Sometimes your criticism of people not exposing themselves to complex topics can come across as not intending to get them to change but just as dismissing their opinions. I get why you dont apprecoate uninformed opinions but i dont see why you have to dampen enthusiasm.

I think sometimes the balance of this being your personal blog and also your way of communicating things you are interested in conflict.

You can be very mean about using popular media like marvel movies or whatnot as a source of complexity. Which is fine and all, but which reads as mean if you want said posts to reach an audience. But you also post news stories and sometimes very thoughtful essays which i assume you want as wide ranging as possible.

So you made fun of that last bloggers very long post about literature appreciation. I just think thats uneccesarily mean, cause like, whats the point? If its to discourage finding the value in popularish literature im not sure I see the point.

Idk im on anon so i may be way overstepping here, but you asked so i figured might as well comment.

I’m going to work slightly back to front here.

That very long post that person made was both a fundamental misreading of the OP’s point and also an example of one of the things I dislike and push back against a lot - a Candide-esque trahison des clercs. I don’t have an issue with finding interest in popularish literature - I have an issue with people elevating it to a pinnacle and insisting you don’t need to go further and that you can’t be critical or frustrated with it and how unavoidable and prominent (some might say dominant) it is, or that you have to keep in mind how many people probably worked really hard to produce it and that effort needs to be considered when assessing the output. I have an issue with people going out of their way to reinforce the prevalence of that.

That blogger was also incredibly presumptuous and rudely intrusive, especially considering they misunderstood or didn’t comprehend the original point being made. And at excessive length.

My issue isn’t really with people not wanting to expose themselves to complex or complicated issues (but also I want to make clear that I do think it *is* an issue) but that they are proudly and aggressively insistent about their lack of exposure to and wanting to deal with complexity and difficult or unpleasant things, and also how horrible people are about their interests and even sometimes likening it to a therapeutic or personal assistance necessity and like they’re an underdog.

Because it isn’t and they aren’t. The marvel movies are some of the most ubiquitous pop culture and media offerings we have. They’ve won. They’re shaping, for better or worse, how movies and other media are made and sold and interacted with. Book offerings get churned out in a similar manner.

The problem is that this coddling and insistence on simplicity and lack of nuance or complexity is a cultural and social negative, because it is carried over and reflected in other aspects of life. And an insistence on remaining simplistic, on not dealing with complexity, is dangerous. It leads to people not understanding the fundamentals of how things work, and of what goes into it. It’s an easily distracted and easily swayed potentiality which only serves bad actors and profit-seekers. And so many of the people who like the marvel movies and booktok stuff (to use two specific examples) are some of the loudest and most assertive voices and also some of the most inflexible and hostile which adds to it.

I get frustrated and push back when I see people acting this way (although I try to not do it too much on their posts) because it is inherently not a neutral mindset or action.

I’m not sure I entirely understand the distinction you were making between this being both my personal blog and also my way of communicating my interest in things because they’re one and the same. There are some posts that I would like to get more exposure sometimes but for the most part this is my blog where I write and share my thoughts and interests and don’t always need or even want an audience. Sometimes I’m just venting and getting stuff out.

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morphogenetic · 3 months

Text

Mediaposting 2024, #3: Chrono Trigger (DS Version)

Completed: January 13th (first run including sidequests) / January 20th (NG+/all endings/near-100% completion run)

Time spent: 35 hours (first run)/55 hours (NG & NG+)

Rating: 7.5/10

i'll get the easy critique out of the way first, and this is specifically a DS version issue (/maybe a steam issue too? not sure): oh my god why the fuck did they think adding the lost sanctum and dimensional vortex sidequests would be a good idea. neither of them add a single thing to the story and are literally like 15 hours of boring as hell sidequests. whyyyyyy did they add this this was PAINFUL to do as a completionist. jfc.

other thoughts under the cut because they are LONG but the TL;DR is: i enjoyed this game! i don't think it's bad at all and can absolutely see the influence it had on the genre! i think it's absolutely a game everyone who cares even a little bit about RPGs should play if they haven't already! i also don't understand why people think it's one of the best games ever made even though i think it's actually quite good in a few aspects!

anyway. continued below

i constantly had heard that chrono trigger had a very cool time travel story, and while aspects of this, absolutely, are true, there are particular parts of the time traveling that feel rather tacked-on to me. in particular, the future and extreme past eras are just....kinda there. and hilariously the same is kind of true of the present era, but that i can excuse to some extent. i don't think any of the eras are particularly bad, but the future in particular was not nearly as well utilized as it should have been, IMO, which kinda bums me out.

for me, the main issue is that it doesn't do enough with the actual 'influencing one era to cause changes in the other' thing until the endgame sidequests, and by the time you can do those, it feels a little too-little, too-late. that or there should have been a better way to space those sidequests out as you actually play the game, because they genuinely add a lot to some of the characters (FROG MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!!! and also lucca benefits a lot from her backstory). but making basically all of them only accessible in the eleventh hour felt very counterproductive to me. the plot is honestly mostly uninteresting to me until the zeal era, and that feels far too late for a game like this. idk. i like the world as a whole but some parts of the worldbuilding itself felt very minimal to me, like i wish the idea of a Nu was discussed AT ALL. or why its like completely normal for people to hang out with monsters/non-humans in 13,000 B.C. idk. just little things but i can tell it was probably more of a system limitation thing than anything else.

that said i think the main cast is quite solid. frog is the best easily, magus is a close second (though he also runs into the same problem where a ton of his character development is laaaaateeee), but i don't hate any of the other characters at all. ayla is fun (love a fun gimmick character every once in a while) and lucca is my favorite kind of weird nerd girl character. marle's playstyle annoys me until you have all of her techs and robo becomes kind of outclassed by frog but man. frog!!!!!! my man. hes so good.

basically no one is Not a fun character. is what im trying to say. i don't think they're all super deep characters, which bothers me a lot more than it probably should for a fucking 90s jrpg, but i like all of them a little bit, which is more than i can say for some games.

also, and this is more of a gameplay structure thing: i really appreciate how chrono trigger praises the player for being patient and for being kind. this is late game, but once you can unlock the chests i LOVE how you get upgraded rewards if you chose to not unlock them in the past. its so smart. that and the cases where your very small actions end up affecting things as minimal as the shopkeepers you can interact with? mwah. so good.

music: everyone always praises the hell out of the music and i do think there are some great tracks (CORRIDORS OF TIME MY BELOVED), but even for the era i dont think its truly exceptional in most ways. not bad at all and i know they had technical limits but.....still. still. corridors of time fucking sweeps them though. my god. what a good song.

art: okay yeah i dont have anything to say here. fucking amazing spritework going on in this game. enemies can be kind of whatever if they're not bosses but the fucking overworld/background art. the amount of emotion that is portrayed in a few pixels is astounding to me.

battle system: has aged so well and as soon as I started playing it i just went "OH THATS WHERE TWEWY GOT THE RELOAD SYSTEM FROM" because its almost a direct straight line of influence LOL. it really does force you to understand the mechanics and not just spam everything with your most powerful attacks. does get a little bit eh by the endgame once you're doing all-field-damage attacks out of necessity, but still. solid. not particularly unique by today's standards but if a game TODAY came out with this system i would have no complaints.

by this point you're probably saying "wow you wrote a lot about this for a game you think is a 7.5/10" and...yeah lol sorry. its just that i can see the influence and while i dont think its the BEST GAME EVAAAR i can absolutely see why people adore it so much. i think im just a slightly different time of rpg fan and this didn't quite scratch the itch for me in all the ways i was hoping it would, but there is no way in hell i can call it bad. i still think anyone who likes video games at all should play it. it just didnt scratch a very specific itch in my brain that i wanted it to (/it was less of a character story than i really like in my games), and so i cant quiiiite bump it up to that 8/10 i wish it so badly was. but theres a reason its a classic, it's aged incredibly well. just doesn't fit my niche enough.

that said. am i playing chrono cross after this? absolutely LOL. might take me a while but i am invested enough in this world to be interested in it. hopefully theres a bit more worldbuilding stuff bc the zeal stuff was SO GOOD but then it got crammed into the last 5 hours and hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i wanted so much more foreshadowing about it. god. anyway.

good game. not the best game of all time for me, but a good game. probably a great game to people who arent as picky as me LSGLSKDGH. just uh. dont play the extra DS content unless you're a completionist like me. lost sanctum MAYBE for the items but i would not bother with the dimensional vortex. its bad. lol

#sorry if you read this whole thing i realize it is long as hell.#mediaposting #aj plays chrono trigger #(for the sake of having this in that tag as well ig)#junpei.txt

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beefandwellington-hopstops · 2 years

Text

Remus Lupins Weird Dreams

Story idea taken from a post by @oxydiane

Regulus: wake up, we’re gonna be late to class

remus: merlin regulus shut up it’s 8 in the fucking morning

remus: wait

remus: what are you doing in our dorm

regulus: i uhm… i’m not here, you’re dreaming, it’s all an illusion

james: why would remus be dreaming about a shirtless regulus black laying next to me in bed trying to wake me up?

regulus: i don’t know what kind of weird things lupin dreams about

remus: excuse me, what the fuck is going on

james: you tell me… why are you dreaming about my boyfriend being shirtless

It was way to fucking early in the morning for this.

And truly the only way for you all (including me) to understand what the fuck is going on is if we go back some time to the month of January, right after we came back from winter holiday.

James had been acting weird for some time, not being as obnoxious as usual, and sneaking out late at night with the map so if any of us did notice he was gone we couldn’t check where he was or who with.

Im pretty sure he thought he was being sneaking but he always snuck out right after I shut my bed curtains, and Im not one to immediately fall asleep most nights so of course I heard him.

He’s used to Padfoot immediately falling asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow, but unlucky for him I don’t.

So since about right after we got back from winter holiday, I know he had been keeping something from us. If not from his late night undisclosed adventures but rather just how he acted.

Of course, I was pretty sure it would take him a long time after he and Lily broke up. They gave it a good shot and they were happy but the long term aspects of their relationships just weren’t there for one, and in some aspects of their lives they were just too different for them to be able to work out. But that happened back before summer during last school year.

And boy oh boy let me tell you, for probably a month James was inconsolable to say the least. He locked himself in his room most days and would only come out if dragged by, Padfoot, Wormtail or I. After many one on one and group conversations with each of us and a reluctant meeting with Lily. He finally started to be the boy he usually was.

Even better was the he and Lily actually worked things out when we made him sit down with her in a bar, in her muggle hometown.

Of course we sat enough tables away so we couldn’t listen but close enough that we could interject if he started having a breakdown in front of her in this random bar.

After about an hour or two of what looked like civil conversations between the two, and Padfoot and Wormtail passed out on each others shoulders. They stood up, hugged each other, and walked over too the table we were occupying.

“You know you guys really didn’t need to stay, I wasn’t gonna burst into flames and burn down the place” James announced as they got close enough to the table. His rather loud declaration awoke the other two with a startle.

“Yeah you would think so Prongs but you didn’t see what we saw this summer, I was sure all your magic was just gonna make you implode on yourself” Padfoot said in quick retaliation.

“Okay, Okay, moving on lets not talk about it okay”

“You guys alright” I decided to ask, make sure we were all still going to be friends.

“Yeah we talked through everything, we're good” this was Lily.

“What does she mean by everything” Wormtail asked as confused as ever.

James was quick to answer “She means we are still friends and that we talked through some stuff, but now we want to get shit faced drunk so are you all ready or what???”

We could tell he didn’t want us to press the issue anymore, so we all just shrugged our shoulders and went along with it.

We all did end up shitfaced drunk at the end of the night crashing at Lily’s house despite the protest of that sister of hers.

We never did find out what they talked about, but it must have been good because they were closer now then, even more so when they were together. So I assumed everything would go back to normal but they didn’t.

He was back to acting how he normally did but, he romantic inclinations seemed to have shift. Being the silent watcher I am, I noticed. His stares going to both sides of the spectrum boy and girl.

Now obviously I didn’t care, Prongs and Wormtail figured out about me and Padfoot pretty quickly, and all our other friends had been pretty accepting anyway. But I assumed it was different for him, being from a pureblood family you probably always felt those pressures. Even though his parents are absolutely fucking amazing and I know love him no matter what, but there is always that voice in the back of your head that tells you what you are doing is wrong. Take it from me and Pads, getting rid of that voice takes more than just one day or one accepting moment of clarity, for some, and it looked as if it would be that way for James, it was going to take a little bit of time.

That amount of time for James was about 5 months. The week before we left for break he took a little longer to get back from the quidditch pitch than usual. Which normally isn’t that weird because him being all weirdly intense about the game means he was usually the last one back but this time he was REALLY late, like missed dinner and didn’t come back until after curfew that night. Of course we asked about 1000 questions of where he was and what he had been doing (he had the map for “some unknown reason”). He just said his parents wanted him to not spend so much time on the pitch over break so he decided last minute to stay there and continue running drills until he realized how late it was and without telling anyone else from the team. Padfoot that night thought it was strange and brought it up as we were dozing off to sleep. I brushed him off as saying there was no reason not to trust Prongs and that he always gets this way with season coming so fast.

But really deep down I agreed with Pads it was slightly strange how he came back so late. But I left it, we were leaving the next morning, no reason to stress about it now, right?

Yeah I was wrong, which doesn’t happen often, but in this instance it did, and its honestly very upsetting.

When we got back from break somehow his mood was still different but not in this bad, sad type of way but rather this happy, gleeful type of way. Which was just weird because the rest of us knew it wasn’t us because we we’re all acting exactly the same. So there had to be some ulterior motive that was making him act this way, I thought maybe it was quidditch, but they lost their first game back so that definitely wasn’t it.

When I finally realized, man did I feel like the biggest fucking idiot on the planet, which says a lot by the way.

One morning when we were all eating breakfast I was finishing up revision on one of my transfiguration papers, while Padfoot and Wormtail were both reading from the same Muggle book that I brought for me. But then they somehow took and are were now in turn obsessed with. I look up across the table to see what James was doing. And in that moment I finally understood why his mood was so drastically different.

He had the biggest love sick eyes for none other than Regulus fucking Black.

The two of them sharing quick longing stares with each other across the great hall. James was too busy ogling at the boy to notice me looking between the two of the intently.

And I know James eyes when it comes to someone he wants romantically. I dealt with it for Godric knows how long when it came to Lily. So as soon as I saw those eyes I knew. Of course I freaked out internally for a minute, because out of every person on this planet he chose Regulus Black. Like my boyfriends brother. What was even more concerning was that Prongs knew first hand all about Sirius and Regulus’s strained relationship. So why would he pick him, it was all very confusing, so confusing to the point that I didn’t even attempt to finish my essay.

I decided to snoop, what can I say I’m nosy alright “Prongs, you alright?”

A little caught off guard James quickly responded “Huh, what oh yeah Im good why?”

“Looks like you were staring at the Slytherins, anything we should be worried about?”

At this Padfoot was immediately interested and focus was now intently on the conversation I was having with James.

“What up Prongs, what did they do”

“Oh nothing, it's just that I was thinking about quidditch, and they were thinking about switching up some players I heard, so I was just looking to who they might replace their people with. That’s all”

“Where did you hear that” I could tell Sirius was confused by the tone of his voice.

“I over heard, Jackson the other day before practice when they were walking off the field, saying something about it to Avery.”

“Interesting, see anyone we should worry about” Pads was convinced and immediately ruined my plan to figure out was actually going on, thanks Sirius.

“Not that I could point out no.”

“Looks like we still got a chance then eh?”

“Of course we do, I am captain after all.”

“Cocky as every Prongs”

“You know it darling”, James said this with his wicked smile and a wink.

After that Sirius went back to reading with Peter, and James just looked down at his food and ate silently, I still wasn’t convinced but I had a paper to write so I dropped it.

But I wish I didn’t, because that night was the night his random late night randevu’s started. It went on for months, and I assumed it had something to do with what I saw that one morning at breakfast, but I could never be sure because he always did it super late, and with the fucking map.

And, I thought that’s just how it was going to keep going, until this morning, this fucking morning.

Padfoot and Wormtail got up early to go to the library in search for some wizard book that is similar to the muggle books I bring, because according to them, “the books are good but would be 100% better if there was magic”. I told them there isn’t any. But of course, the didn’t believe and me and were convinced that they could find one and that they were gonna prove how much better it would be than my magic-less books.

So they were gone and I got to deal with the following events all by myself, and I am not a morning so this morning haunts my fucking dreams.

I was abruptly awoken to a voice I knew but did not expect to be hearing in my dorm.

“James, wake the fuck up we are going to be late for class”

“Meriln Regulus shut the fuck up it’s 8 in morning” I said this before I even realized what was going on.

“Wait” At this I opened my bed curtains to see the full view of James bed.

“What are you doing in our dorm?”

At this moment Regulus makes his way out of James bed and starts readjusting the clothes I assumed he just threw on.

“I uhm, Im not here, you're dreaming, it's all an illusion.”

Prefect punctual timing as always James decides to wake up and input his always so very helpful information.

“Why would Remus be dreaming about a shirtless Regulus black laying next to me in my bed trying to wake me up”

“I don’t know what kind of weird things Lupin dreams about.”

Okay now I really don’t know what the fuck is going on, “Excuse me, what the fuck is going on.”

“You tell me, why are you dreaming about my boyfriend being shirtless.”

“Your what now”

This is the moment James realized what was actually going on and what he had just said/admitted to me.

He looked at me with wide eyes like a deer in headlights. I think Regulus sensed there was something going on so he finished grabbing all his things and began to leave to go to class.

“I see later James.”

“Yeah yeah, Reg i'll come see you later” James said all of this while looking me as we were still staring at each other. Me with confusion blasted across my face, him with nothing but worry from ear to ear.

As the door finally closed behind regulus, words started tumbling out of my mouth.

“James, what exactly was that, because I can’t seem to wrap my head around the fact that I opened my eyes and saw Regulus Black, Sirius Blacks brother, you BEST FRIENDS BROTHER, in your bed at 8 in the morning, shirtless.”

“Okay Moony its not as weird as you think”

“No James, it is as weird as I think, because there is really only one expiation for what I just saw and HEARD you say.”

“You know its not fair to take advantage of someone right after they wake up, they have no filter, and words just slip out”

“I wasn’t taking an advantage of the situation you were the one who got all offended at the mention of Regulus being shirtless.”

“I mean wouldn’t you be concerned and confused if you woke up to someone saying that they had shirtless dreams about Padfoot.”

“No I wouldn’t because I know everyone has shirtless dreams about him, but I'm the only one he dreams about so I'm not particularly worried about it.”

“Okay fair point, he was a bad example to use I guess.”

“Okay, so do you care to explain what exactly is going on?”

“Listen Remus its complicated”

When James said this, it looked liked actual pain in his eye, like he was nervous to tell me what exactly was going on between him and Regulus, like I was going to judge or ridicule him. I think that look in his eyes, that moment stuck with me more than anything else that had happened to me that morning.

“Listen, James you know you can tell me anything right? Im one of your best friends, and I don’t think I exactly have the right to be judgmental in what you chose to do with your life. Especially considering all that you put with for me.”

“Moony that’s different.”

“No James it's not, truly its not. Yeah the person may not be the best person on the planet considering Padfoot and his relationship with his family. But James, Sirius loves you far more than the hate he has for his family. That boy loves so much harder than he hates. And I get that it's scary for you, what he will think, how he will react. And Im gonna be completely honest with you it might take him awhile, just like some people took awhile to get used to me and Padfoot. But James, his love for you will always always trump any emotion he might have about anything else. I don’t want you too have to hide in-front of us, or from us. You do too much for us to have hide who you truly are, or who you truly love. I don’t want to push you, it does no good in me doing that. But James the one thing you have to take from this conversation, is that he will always love you, I will always love you, and so will Pete, and all of our other friends. Take your time, but don’t be scared James, we are here for you, just as you are for us, okay?”

James doesn't say anything, but nods his head.

The next moment he was embracing me in a hug, with the sound of tears rolling down his eyes.

He whispers into my ears, “Thank you Moony, really thank you.”

I pull back from the hug to look at him in the eyes, fresh tears streaming from them, and give him the gentlest look I can conjure up, and a soft nod my head.

“Come on Prongs, let's go get breakfast.”

He smiles at me and agrees, “Alright Moony lets go.”

We don’t mention what I saw that morning or what I said to him the rest of the day, just like I knew we wouldn’t. He would eventually say something, I knew he would, but at this moment, it was just a matter of time.

#Remus Lupin #James Potter #Sirius Black #peter pettigrew #regulas black #wolfstar #jegulus #Marauders #Harry Potter #marauders era #Lily Evans #jily

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hopeheartfilia · 1 year

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ahhh trying to analyse what i think about mo ran's little inner monologue about liking chu wanning and not shi mei and like

:readmore:

fundamentally i do thinks there is some truth to it, like putting someone on a pedestal as pure and good isnt really about being in love.. like its you not the state of u get to the nitty gritty, if u dont like their flaws specifically do you even like them or just the idea of this perfect kind eprson youve build in your mind that cannot be sullied

but also i feel like i disagree about the. sexual aspect of it? like just because youre not horny doesnt mean you dont have a crush? but also i tried to explain what it feels like to have a crush when not hornh and im having the issue of im demiromantic and ive had one crush in my whole ass life and it was in middle school, i simply do not know enough about romantic attraction to tell you. Like i can easily say that Mo Ran isnt experiencing just sexual attraction, even if he is ridiculously horny, but like

How to explain that while yes i dont 5hink you had a crush on shi mei that its not because you dont like shimei physically? you also dont seem to enjoy spending time with shimei that much and dont seem to have many meaningfull connections with him. also also you dont seem to want to be closer to shi mei you just want him to be safe and happy and stuff? It sounds a bit likea ! hes so nice to me, sort of squish. Like when someone does somethibg really nice for you and you decide that youve pack bonded and youre gonna be extra nice to them and youre gonna be the bestest of friends

but often they end up not even being your best friend. because your bestfriend is someone who you dont get tired if being around for days in end and who you can argue but then understand each other, not just someone whos nice to you. you know.

And like Mo Ran doesnt like Chu Wanning jsut because he does somethibg nice for him, he respects jim and has the eorlds most obvious crush BeforE that, thats just when he goes Shizun care for me too? owo and then Cherish the shizun protect the shizun, and i feel like the xie sini moment of Arent I human too? Dont I hurt too? Was more important? Like figuiring out hes been fundamentally misunderstanding Chu Wanning and then finding out for himself what the guy is really liek is what does it for him, because its the understanding, its about the knowing

You can like people without knowing them but you cant love them without knowing them and being willing to learn more

Anyway im going on a tangent and i still cant tell you what the difference in the whole lvoe thing eould be between learning to love chu wanning romantically and in general is outside of he thinks all of his sharpest edges are cute? they endear shizun to him, and thats all i have because i dont remember the like. questions of that What type of attraction are you feeling? quiz that helps me work it out.

yeah i have a bit more emotional intelligence then mo ran because i spend a looot of time thinking and self analysing but also its not by much. which is partly why i find his EM of -33 so relatable. mine is zero in this metaphor, which is better but still. like at least i can tell other peoples emotions apart with a suprsingly high degree of accuracy for someone who had managed to convince themselves they cant feel guilt and it was just anger obviously, not misplaced guilt nuh uh

ah i need to figuire out hoe to add a readmore in mobile for this rant

anyway mo ran yes correct conslusion that youre head over heels for chu wanning and not in love with shi mei, but no i dont think its just because you desire him carnally, you also desire him in every other way, ehich does not seem to apply to shi mei, but i dont think youre ready for that internal "im not even sure you consider shi mei as a human person with like agency and shit and nit a prop in your backstory" conversation. Which. I do see that shi mei isnt written that way which is just.. perfection, the complexity of secondary characters in danmei is unparalleled, love it when people that arent the main couple have personalities

#a shitpost can be blue #2ha #me #i read 2ha #mo ran #long post #i hope the read more works but i have my doubts #you just gonna have to scroll down #erha

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myrfing · 1 year

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ok finished cloud cuckoo land by anthony doerr. it’s alright he’s good at weaving together stories and it has a strong central thread that binds a ton of seemingly distant narratives together. his prose is good; the dude loves stories and it shows. and I love stories about stories so I immediately picked up this book when I read the backing.

err weaker points is that it’s frankly one of those things that you can tell the writer is like…a center-left white american guy whose main purview into political issues is from the seat of the safe spectator trying to write a story encompassing all of humanity. politics, violence, and change wrought by humans instead of time is scary and almost always portrayed as senseless, power-obsessed delusion that’s beyond the grasp or interests of common men. to his credit he tried to extend a great amount of personhood to a character he even classifies as an extremist terrorist (who are like, leftist ecoterrorists; terrible chinese commies who “senselessly” call an american soldier an imperialist pawn also make their appearance—the question of the soldier being in a foreign land fighting the war is never addressed beyond his personal unfamiliarity and the plight of the american soldier) and puts a lot of effort into weaving a circumstance that explains why this “guileless boy” gets radicalized into anarcho eco communism through youtube cult figures (lol, interesting choice considering the reality of things) but he still classifies and grants these roles according to his belief yknow. all of the female characters get married and pop out a bunch of babies in the end and their function as such is supposed to be some narrative tie in to the theme of hope. he writes this passage:

and pretty much only reflects on it later on to have anna (the girl) be like Well he doesnt treat me like a possession. and of course here they’re only playing into an illusion to survive the absurdly cruel rules of their world, but they fall into the illusion in the end, and she, who had such a deep and compelling narrative before, pretty much loses all agency at the point their tales meet. she spends the rest of her life childrearing and learning the language of her conquerers and sewing haphazardly, which she hated as a child, and to be a “carrier/symbol/memory of hope” and is content while her husband’s life and journey continues. this is their return home and the end of the monomyth. and this isnt unintentional or a mistake it’s just written as a part of this overarching theme: the world is forever cyclical in the same way, everyone is the same, through stories we are able to just bear it and stave off death, and so “the world as it is is enough”. everything is in its place. it sort of believes that if only people understood that that they would settle down and not seek great change and foolish notions of a better world. but then it also sort of touches dotingly on this aspect too; it says the fools are just human and being a fool and dreaming of better things and not understanding all while tangling the threads of their mistakes and misguidedness more are what makes them human.

it’s sort of the reason why j0yce from DE (YESSS im going unto the epic crossover again) is the one to say an extremely similar line: “This world is enough.” it’s a lovely line and it does ring true, and it’s something that staves off despair which is a huge central thing to his story, but the outcomes of it are different for everyone. this doesn’t really occur to him and he writes like the power of this idea will always result in the same inevitable outcomes. people realize the world is enough; they abandon the cloud cuckoo land and return home and are granted peace and happiness and truth, for a time, and its enough. he both sideses everything in his story except this. and this whole story reminds me of when DE’s writers mentioned they moved elysium from the middle ages to modernity after realizing they couldn’t cling to antiquity and the middle ages and the old days when “history was not so complicated” to convey what they wanted to convey. doerr sort of instead clings to it instead; the entire narrative is spun around the idea that the myths of old are undying and unchanging and hold a sort of immortal truth that will forever govern human lives.

im not a huge fan of this personally, obviously, and reading through the book was like someone showing me a ton of ingredients I love and cooking them up real fancy with a lot of flourish and then coming out with something that tastes pretty good but is a little bland, like something is missing or there was some misunderstanding of what flavors could have been created. but it’s a fun tale to read with great pacing and great skill in running parallels between all the stories involved and it says something nice enough about human hope and living memory

#it’s like if cloud atlas wasnt about people struggling against history but submitting themselves to it. LMFAO

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aikalie · 2 years

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What my autism means to me

To me, my autism has affected almost every aspect of my life without me realizing it. I've always been a really social person, but it's always been easier to be social online. I've been praised many times for how easy it is to make friends, except it rarely feels like people genuinely want to be around me. When I was younger, I saw interacting with people as a form of "practice" to learn how to interact better. At some point in each friendship, if they go on long enough, someone will misunderstand something I say. I'll say something matter-of-factly and they'll get unreasonably upset without me knowing why. Trying to resolve these issues usually just makes it worse. Without me realizing, the very literal things I was saying were being interpreted as having some kind of hidden meaning that was seen as highly offensive. Realizing I'm autistic, at the very least, gives me an understanding of why this is happening and gives me a chance a fixing the problem instead of just being abandoned without knowing what I even did.

Knowing I'm autistic has also let me learn how to communicate. I'm able to tell people "I mean this literally but" or work out ways of communicating with people who don't get it. There's still hiccups sometimes where people want to believe I'm some demon but I do my best. My girlfriend is also autistic and our communication, while not always perfect, is something special. We're able to communicate our needs clearly and explain if something upset us or if we dont understand something. Communication is always a work in progress, but knowing I'm autistic was like a huge arrow in the right direction to learning.

Social etiquette is another beast entirely. Following specific rules for specific places made little sense to us. If you're in a fancy place why should you wear clothes that are restrictive and only act in certain ways? Why should I do this or that when I just wanna act like myself? Acting how we want has made us come off as carefree or childish to a lot of people, or cool to others; Meanwhile I simply just don't understand the social rules well enough to follow them or care. It's inappropriate to bring a plushie into the office and cuddle it while working? Why though, like serious answer. They're something I love, and I'm here all day and they help me get my work done better, why should I not have one aside from social etiquette.

Stimming is another thing I've had a lot of internalized shame about. There were a lot of things I do that I didn't quite realize were stimming, like playing with my hair or cracking my knuckles. But something like rocking back and forth when im happy or sad has always been see as a negative autistic trope, so I forcibly stopped myself from doing that and felt a lot of shame. I've felt way more comfortable with myself since I let myself enjoy these things. Holding some kind of toy or a plushie to stim with helps me keep focused. Knowing I'm autistic has helped a lot in letting myself stim more for positive effects and not guilt myself about it.

I've always had a weird relationship with food. The types of foods we like depends on who's fronting in the system, but oftentimes we prefer foods without too many conflicting flavors. After learning about autism, we realized texture plays a massive factor in our diet. One food we all universally hate is mashed potatoes, we cant even eat french fries if they're too soft. People always gave us shit about this like "who doesn't like potatoes what even are you". I cant stand their texture, it repulses me. A bunch of other foods are like this too. We always were believed to be a picky eater, but most of the pickiness comes from texture issues. We also tend to have foods that we can eat 3 times a day for weeks on end, nothing but that food. Even people we were close to kind of thought this was weird but just went along with it. One day we just stop eating that food suddenly. Everything made a lot more sense when we realized it was the autism, and we're able to not hate ourselves for being so picky now.

Not only with food, but our senses play into things a lot more than we realized. We're not as averse to fabrics as much as others may be but we still keep to comfortable clothes and materials. We really like blankets and plushies, they're really soft and make us comfy. When it comes to sounds, something like a crying baby or sirens are miserable. We were told we were being immature when we were younger for covering our ears from bad noises, we didn't understand why noone else did. I realize now that because I'm autistic, those bad noises actually cause my physical agony, like my body is screaming out, while for neurotypical people those bad noises are merely uncomfortable. We prefer small, dim spaces with lots of soft objects over anything else. We often have trouble processing speech, so it can take a few tries to recognize what someone said. This makes listening to music hard as after a dozen listens we still probably won't understand what the lyrics in a song are. We tried noise canceling headphones before, and cutting out the bulk of sound really helped our mood. Sensory input can become incredibly overwhelming without realizing it.

Stuff like pattern recognition with autism? We're not amazing at patterns persay, but sometimes we're great at figuring things out in our own ways. Routines never made sense to us, but with the magic of autistic literal thinking, we thought routines were like "you only follow a planner of what to do every hour". In actuality its more like, you prefer doing certain things in certain ways or orders. We shower every morning, we dont feel properly awake if we don't. After a shower we need to put lotion on our whole body or we feel wrong. We put silverware away specifically spoons, then forks, then knives just because that feels like the way they should be ordered, even though it really shouldn't matter. A weirder one we didnt understand why others didn't care but our blanket needs to be on the right way, with seams downwards and the tag by our feet, anything else feels wrong.

Realizing we had autism made us feel less like we were quirky little weirdos and let us learn to be happy with the way we are. It's impossible to explain every example of autism in our life, but since learning we had it we've been constantly realizing why we are certain ways and make sense of ourselves in a positive way for once.

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navalha-kw · 6 months

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Hey, I'm sorry you're struggling right now. I hope and pray that your surgeon understands your pain and needs and does their best to correct whatever they fucked up. I hope during your consultation they listen to you that you can have the corrective surgery you need to regain your life. I know nothing I say can really calm you down or make you feel better but I just hope that things work out for you and you start to feel better in all aspects of your life. Take care!

Hii thank you for your kind words, it really means a lot to me <3 I'm sorry I'm just, dumping all that stuff here. It's if i dont speak it out or write it down it just keeps on making me insane. I feel like i need a place to just. Say shit i feel and the stuff i have to do to somehow make it more understandable for my brain. I'm slowly learning how to maneuver in this new situation....

It's not THAT bad really, when I try to think logically...

It probably could be worse... it's just the realization that no, this is not the end, I'm not fixed even though I should have been felt like. Well. Felt like the end of the world. I had so much hope and poof, it's gone

I'm stubborn as fuck and I know I CAN and i WILL find ways to live and work and (kinda) exercise around it not to damage myself any more, it's not like i can't move at all, it's not like it hurts a lot for now... Its my future area of expertise and job, I'm just gonna pretend I'm my own patient that I can't mess up...

I know I shouldn't self-diagnose but after so many doctors failed to find a reason why my nerves got messed up symmetrically in both of my hands (they said it's impossible to say) the reason literally came out itself after surgery :/// i hope I will find a surgeon that has seen this before. I'll have to get like an ultrasound done by a very good radiologist to confirm what my symptoms mean, but from the anatomical point of view... yeah im 95% sure im right about this :') I'll probably need to have a part of the triceps' tendon moved from its place and attached to the medial part of it to be able not to shift my whole life around this dysfunction

It's not that bad but it will require a lot of changes and a lot of time will pass before the polish national health fund will get me a term for a revision if someone qualifies me for it, so I guess I have to get used to it amd accept how it is

Good thing, now that I have a high probability of knowing the reason, I can try to work on my right elbow for it not to get this bad, and if it does eventually, at least the doctors will know they'll have to address both issues at once.

But gods, I really hope my surgeon will know what to do (ehhhh) but mostly that he knows or will help me find someone that has more experience with this stuff

Fingers crossed, I see him in 3h 🤞🤞

#take care as well anon <3

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slenderfirebolt · 6 months

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Since im up too late i may as well make a too-long post about my thoughts on meat consumption in its present form. So, while im not completely against eating animals on an ethical level (animals eat eachother in nature, we evolved from animals that ate animals, pretty normal stuff) most of my issues come from our means of meat production and the insane amount of food waste, which while especially bad in the US, i imagine definetly exists everywhere else. the main reason why i was fine with eating meat before is because it feels so wasteful to *not* get the benefits after everything the animal went through. i imagine myself from the perspective of the animal; i am born to be a product, i am fed and watered only so that my flesh may be harvested for consumption by a being beyond my understanding. i may live without ever seeing the sun or feeling the wind... that fucking sucks, obviously evil. So when i consider that the life of so many animals, i feel terrible thinking about how after that, so much of the meat is wasted, left to rot and be thrown away. while it would still be an ethical dillemna even if we *did* consume 100% of the meat produced by factory farms, the fact that we basically make animal grinders to mass-produce living, feeling things and then *chuck most of it in the trash* is utterly unacceptable to me. Factory farming is likely to continue forever, even though we have many alternitaves to meat, plenty of people still eat meat *because* it is from an animal, so that demand will always exist. worse than that, a sudden decrease in demand would lead to *further* food waste, and some meat alternitaves are too expensive for everyone to afford. also, theres a cultural aspect as well, many cultures are very meat-centric or have the raising of animals for meat as a core practice, what right would anyone have to decide that a tradition or practice should end? so if i have so many reasons why its ok to eat meat, why am i deciding to cut back now? it seems like, at least from my perspective, my reasoning is fairly ethically sound. well firstly, its expensive if its anything other than chicken and im a college student, and given the fact ill probably need a *doctorate* and at minimum a master's in my field, any savings is good. Holy fucking shit i hate having to use my teeth to scrape bones free of their meat, also eating tendons is annoying. overally, eating tofu and beans tends to provide me more enjoyment (an important part of good food) than eating most meats. they are more consistent, can have plenty a variety of flavors, and while certainly far from *cheap* depending on brand, the cost/enjoyment/calorie balance, at least for me, is better than meats. easier to cook alternitaves. wont poison you if you cook em wrong. also since its so consistent its fairly predictable, and you dont have to navigate all the bones. to be completely honest, im unsure if ill end up totally ommitting meat products from my diet, since i dont want to waste food thats given to me, and i still want to enjoy the foods i do eat that involve meat, but i think from now on im not going to buy meat as part of groceries, and instead consume the alternitaves. i have already been on track to do this for months, the chicken that inspired this is the first 'meaty' thing i have eaten in ages. If anyone has any particular favorite vegetarian dishes, especially on the cheaper end, lemme know, since im more than open to try them out.

#food #vegetarianism #vegetarian #ethics #meat consumption #meat #i hate bones #also tofu is good #and beans are good

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