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#anyway if you read this far hello hi. hope you're well
moonsidesong · 1 year
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i like how much hfjone gives me thinky thoughts. ending spins around in my brain going wheeee whats gonna happen now who knooooows
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loveswrites · 1 year
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Hey bestie, how you have been? Hope is good! Anyway, i really L O V E D your poly Volturi things, i was wondering if you take requests here goes one...
Ok, listen, fem!reader x poly volturi one where the reader is in her period, like I'm in mine and reading this i was wondering how they will react like smelling the blood all the time... i will love to see the way you work on this, but just if your comfortable.
So is this, take care of yourself and hope you have a great day! (and sorry for the bad English :)
Red Sea Poly Volturi x reader
Time it took me: 4 hours along with a cupcake bake in the middle and then part of the next day which was today so i'd say 8 hours
Word count: 2884
To Coraline: Hello Lovely! I've been doing a little bit better thank you so much for asking! I loved this req seeing as I am on mine as well I felt that it was a perfect time to write it and I guess that's what pushed me to write it so quickly! But I don't think I really did what you asked for? I don't know I always just get the vibes that I don't truly listen to you guys when you req something, I always do something like it lmao. Let me know how you liked it thou! Ps. Your English was lovely!
Love <3
Poly Volturi x reader
Turning a corner you let out a long sigh. Currently you were walking around the castle just going around in circles indecisive on who you wanted to spend time with and who you wanted to ask for some.. Things.  You had woken up today to your punishment for simply being a woman. Your period. The reason you were walking around and not just lying in bed like you normally would is because this is your first time having your period in a castle full of vampires. Your period was very irregular so even though it had been a few months since your mates had found you, you’ve never bled around them before. 
You were nervous to see how they would react to it. You thought about asking Jane for some pads but then you remembered that she doesn’t have a period. And she’s probably never had one in her life to begin with. You thought about asking Felix but you felt that he would just make fun of you or tease you. Which was something you didn’t want to deal with right now. If someone teased you about something you couldn’t control you feel like you’d just snap. 
Asking Alec was just a plain no. You knew he’d just stare at you in confusion like what the hell do you mean your bleeding? With Caius you didn’t want to bother him as he was busy with trails right now with the other kings. Plus you’d have a feeling he’d want to paint with it. He has this infatuation with the way dark red blood looks. And you didn’t want him to paint a mural out of your blood for you. Though you're sure it would be gorgeous, he never disappoints you with his paintings.  
The only one that was left was Demtri. Your gentleman out of all your mates. Now you would ask him because you know he wouldn’t tease you or ask some weird request once you got what you needed but that still didn’t stop you from avoiding him also. 
So when you woke up this morning with the red sea between your legs you rushed to the bathroom and took a shower. Covering yourself in scents you’d only use if it was your last day on earth. Spraying yourself in the most expensive perfume that you could find. God do your mates love to spoil you or what? This one bottle of perfume you knew for a fact was a thousand dollars and yet they still said “It was nothing.” For once you were grateful that your room was on the far side of the castle away from all the other vampires including your mates.
You had picked this room purely based on the views that came with it. Your balcony was facing the ocean side of the castle. You could fall asleep to the sounds of the ocean waves crashing against the rocks. And you could watch the horizon where the moon and the sun would meet everyday, each rise and set of the moon and sun was always better than the last. That was what you loved about this castle. And that was what you loved about your wing of it. It was your small piece of the fortress and no one could take that away from you. Your love’s made sure of it. 
Taking the silk sheets off your bed you did your best to scrub them clean but of course there was still a stain. You tossed them into the hamper and made a mental note to ask the maid to come get it later for you. You placed new sheets on your bed. You changed your makeshift pad that was made of tissue then you were off to pace the halls to grow some balls.  
You wore your robes that matched all the vamps that were with the volturi, hood up and all in attempts to hide your identity. 
It didn’t work. 
You were convinced that everyone in the castle knew your scent by hard because every vampire that passed, rather they were walking normally or vamping away, they would pause in their tracks and make sure to bow to you. Though it was completely unnecessary, you loved how it made you feel. The power that you hold as just a human brung so much pride to you. The 3 kings and your mates always would tell you to own it and so you did. 
You tried hiding in the shadows when you knew that someone was coming. Pushing yourself against the walls, even turning your whole body like you were just put into time out. You knew you looked like a dumbass but that wasn’t the point nor your problem right now. All you knew was that you didn’t want to face any more people than necessary. 
Finally after what felt like hours you finally made it to the receptionist desk. You were thankful that she was even there. She was always off doing something she had no business doing. You were surprised that she hadn’t gotten herself killed yet. But today you were grateful for that. 
“What can I do to help you?” She asked, putting on a voice that you could tell was supposed to be charming. It was not.
Pulling your hood off she immediately stood from her chair but quickly dropped down to bow. 
“My queen, Is there anything I can do to assist you? Master Caius is out feeding with the others. Would you like me to retrieve him?” She asked, speaking softly. 
Respect was a big thing with the kings if someone showed you any signs of disrespect you never saw or heard from them again. So it was understandable as to why she switched up so fast. 
“No, I was wondering if you had any… You know.. Tampons or pads? Anything honestly.” You said rushing it out. But still trying to keep it low.
“Oh! Don’t you have any of that stuff? They practically treat you like royalty.” She laughed with a roll of her eyes. 
That pissed you off. She’s always had a problem with you and you’ve always kept your mouth shut but today that wasn’t how you were feeling.
“Because I am. Now if you don��t like it or respect it I have no problem having this conversion with the kings. I'm sure they would love to hear about this.” You said in a stern voice, sending her a glare. Her eyes widened, you never threatened anyone, you’ve never had to. It was always done for you if it needed to be done. 
She got up and quickly left, hoping she went to get you something, anything at this point. You could feel that your makeshift pad is not working. 
“Till we hear about what, Amore mio?” You heard behind you making you jump and turn around. When you did you were faced by the three kings themselves. You found yourself sort of stung in place. Your plan was to come get some pads and I don’t know, hide until it all went away? Horrible plan but it worked in your head. This was not a part of your plan.
“Umm nothing I was justt..” You dragged out shifting your eyes between the three. 
Aro was staring at you with his wide curious eyes. Marcus looked at you with soft knowing eyes, he always knew when things were wrong with you. And caius looked at you with narrowed eyes.
“Are you hiding something from us?” Caius questioned stepping closer to you. You felt your heart skip a beat. They heard it of course. 
“Caius can you go away?” You asked, covering your face with the palm of your hands.
“Why would I go away? Are you trying to run away?!” Cauis yelled out, making you frown.
“Caius..” Marcus sighed out. There was no doubt that Cauis’s biggest fear was you leaving him and him never being able to find you. It broke your heart that he felt he wasn’t truely loveable.
“I swear you're bipolar.” You said taking your hands off your face just in time to see the receptionist with a brown bag in her hand. When you saw this you grabbed it from her and ran as fast as you could. 
“I wanna be alone right now! No one bother me, pass the message along!” When you turned your head to see if they were behind you they weren't even there. Seeing this you stopped running and caught your breath leaning on a wall. You swear you need to work out more. Or hell even walk more, but what's the point when you can have Felix carry you everywhere? 
Since you were down here on this side of the castle you thought why not stop and get some snacks? So that’s what you did. Big mistake.
Walking into the kitchen you saw Demetri and Felix and immediately turned around hoping that they didn’t see you.
“Bellissima?” Dem said softly, making you turn around.
“Yes?” You said, just as softly.
“Are you alright?” He said, raising an eyebrow.
“Yes of course! Why wouldn’t I be?” You said shifting from side to side slightly cringing.
“What’s that sme-” Before Felix could even finish his sentence you dashed out of that kitchen and you ran. You ran straight to your room and you didn’t stop for anything or anybody. Your one mission was to get to your room and stay there. 
Once you got to your room you ran straight to the bathroom and turned the shower on. You didn’t even allow yourself to think about how embarrassingly long it took you to get to this point. You never paid attention to how many people or how many vampires live in this castle until you felt like fresh bait to them. You let yourself relax feeling the hot water hit your back. You allowed it to wash away the mixed emotions you had. 
Once you got out you did your normal hygiene routine and you felt better. You felt ready to rot in a ball for the next week. Opening your bathroom door you stopped in your tracks when you saw all of your mates standing in front of you.
“Hi..?” You said after a minute passed and no words were spoken.
“Why are you acting so strange?” Alec was the first to speak.
“How could I have been acting strange? I haven't even seen you today!” You yelled out holding onto your towel tighter. 
“Yes you have, you’ve seen us both when you were cowering into the ‘shadows’.” Jane said plainly.
“You walked right past us like you didn’t even know who we were!” Alec yelled.
“Don’t yell at me!” You yelled back at him frowning.
“Why not?! If I don’t yell you might walk right past me again!”
“Just cause I walked past you doesn’t mean you can yell at me!”
“I can do whatever-” 
“Where not going to solve this yelling at her!” Dem yelled, cutting Alec off.
“Anyone wanna talk to her and not yell at her?!” He yelled looking at the rest of your mates. 
While he eyes weren’t on you you felt your eyes water and you couldn’t stop the tears from rolling down your face. The moment you sniffled you caught everyone's attention.
“You made her cry!” Alec yelled glaring at Demetri.
“I didn’t do a damn thing!” Dem yelled back at Alec.
That started a yelling war between Alec and Dem which only made you cry harder. It was frustrating. 
“Can someone tell me what that smell is!” Felix yelled out in his own frustration. As he had been sniffing everything like a damn dog since you’ve seen him. 
“It’s me! It’s me okay? I’m fucking bleeding I’m on my period okay?! That’s why I’ve been acting weird all day it’s embarrassing and I needed some pads but I didn’t have any and I knew that none of you did and I didn’t wanna ask so I didn’t and you guess kept popping up in places that you didn’t belong and-”
“You smell good.” Felix said, making you stop immediately.
“What?” You questioned.
“Yeah you smell sweeter but at the same time dull. It’s something I’ve never smelt before. It makes my mouth water.” Felix said, staring at you with slightly darker red eyes.
“I agree.” Cauis said, looking you up and down with greedy eyes. 
“She doesn’t smell like that to me, she smells like a softer scent of her normal self.” Dem said now looking at you with a strange expression on his face.
“She smells like something that I can’t explain but it’s pleasant.” Jane said as Alec agreed with her.
“I smell good?” You questioned with your voice cracking slightly.
“You always smell good. Are you seriously telling us that this is the reason that you’ve been avoiding us? That’s a foolish reason.” Cauis said.
“I’ll go gather some stuff you’ll need.” Jane said and before you could say anything of hell even blind she was gone. 
“I’ve read a whole book about menstrual cycles before-” Felix started.
“You can read?” Alec scoffed, dodging the book Felix threw at him in reflex.
“We're gonna take good care of you, I promise.” Felix said as he appeared at your side and settled you on your bed softly. 
“Master Caius, can you lay down? As much as I don’t like to admit it, you're her favorite to lay on when she’s in pain.” He asked, even though Cauis wanted to respond to Felix's statement he kept his mouth shut for your sake.
Cauis pulled you into him as he laid down and you felt yourself relax immediately. While you felt it they could hear it. 
“I’m in my towel this is not a reliable form of protection if you catch my drift?” You said to your mates hinting at the fact that you’d like to get dressed.
“You think I care if you bleed on me Amore mio?” Caius questioned in a dull tone as if it wasn’t a big deal.
“Yes I do.” You said as a matter of fact. This sent your mates into a tumble of laughter. While you looked dumbfounded they just shook their heads.
“Sometimes I think you forget what we are.” Dem said looking at you with a soft smirk on his face.
“We eat your kind for breakfast, lunch and dinner and yet you think we are put off by a little drop of blood. That is foolish.” Cauis said, shaking his head pulling you closer to him. 
“Now relax until Jane gets back.” Felix said leaving no room for argument.
With this being said you watched as your mates took their places in your room. Alec sat in a chair that was next to your bed grabbing a book to read. Felix turned on your tv that they had installed and began flipping through the channels. And dem was busy closing all of your curtains so that the room was dark for you. You felt loved by the smallest things that they were doing. Even if it didn’t benefit you, you felt at peace with your loves just in the same place as you. 
As you close your eyes Cauis begins stroking your hair sending a small shiver down your spine due to his cold finger tips. 
“If you just let us change you you wouldn’t have to go through this pointless pain.” Cauis said, making you shake your head.
“I show one sign of pain and you already wanna kill me.” You said snuggling closer into Caius which he welcomed with open arms.
“You’d be reborn into Una versione migliore di te.” He voiced like it was nothing.
“You know that I haven’t been keeping up with my lessons with Marus!” You yelled hitting caius on his side.
“And whose fault is that?” Alec said casually flipping the page to his book he was reading. 
“Not mine actually! Because everytime I try to go to Marcus study, one of you always stops me in my tracks and leads me in a different direction!” You said pointing to each one of your mates. To which none of them could say anything because they knew that it was true.
“See.” You said smiling at the fact that there was no back talk at all. 
Some time passed and you had fallen asleep. When you woke up you felt a weight on your stomach looking down you saw that it was Jane. Her head rested on your stomach. The sun had gone completely down and it was now pitch black in your room but you felt no fear in your heart because you knew that you were safe. 
When you went to shift your legs you were placed with a reminder of why they were here in the first place. Looking down at your previously white towel you couldn’t help the words that came out of your mouth.
“Fucking hell.” You groaned, rolling your eyes.
“A little free bleeding ain’t never hurt nobody.” Felix said with a smirk that you could just feel in your soul.
“What the fuck.” You said and immediately you heard a few chuckles come from different parts of the room.
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allysunny · 5 months
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(You're) My Antidote Pt. 3 | Miguel O'Hara x Fem!Reader
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ˡᵒᵛᵉˡʸ ᵐᶦᵍᵘᵉˡ ᵃʳᵗ ᵇʸ ᵖᶦⁿᵏᶦᵉᵐᵐᵉ ᵒⁿ ᵗᵘᵐᵇˡʳ
ᵖᵃʳᵗ ¹ | ᵖᵃʳᵗ ² | ᵖᵃʳᵗ ³
Synopsys: Your pregnancy is coming to an end, and Miguel is getting desperate. You're getting sicker and sicker, and your baby seems to be causing more harm than good, as his antidotes. He's running out of time. But Miguel is willing to do anything to ensure your well-being, as well as the well-being of his child.
Words: 8.2k words
Warnings: Angst, fluff, exhausted-Miguel, but also very soft-Miguel, hospitals, very bad science, like, really, really bad science, pain and screaming, syringes, blood, mentions of a difficult labour, births, a very cheesy and corny ending, untranslated Spanish (please correct me if any of it is wrong!). Do mention if I forgot something!
A/N: Hello everyone! I'm here to finally deliver Part 3 of (You're) My Antidote! This one is a little longer than the previous parts, but I guess you can figure out why. Also, I took very big artistic liberties with all of the science talk in this part. Please let me inform everyone that I DO NOW KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SCIENCE! Everything in here except for the childbirth part is COMPLETELY MADE UP!
So if there are any science majors or doctors out there reading this, please do not burn me at the stake. I really did try my best.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the conclusion to this series! I had a blast :)
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“Her vitals are stable, but we don’t know how much longer they’ll stay that way.” Spider-Doc said, looking at the file on his tablet. “She’s lost a lot of blood and it’s likely she’ll feel weak and sick for a while. We might have to keep her here for a few days before she can return home.”
If she returns home at all.
Miguel was staring at you. Lovely, beautiful, sickly you, lying on a hospital bed. He watched the slow rise and fall of your chest, and winced when his eyes caught the oxygen mask that covered the lower half of your face.
After you’d started bleeding on your bed, he’d taken you to the Spider Society Medical Centre, worried sick. He’d refused to leave the room as every medically inclined Spider-Person ran exams on you. He wasn’t allowed inside your room (He might be the leader of Spider Society, but doctors were doctors, and it didn’t matter how worried he was – he wanted them to do the best they could with no distractions) and paced back and forth in front of the door, until eventually allowed back inside.
 “And the baby?” he asked, unable to keep his eyes of you.
“Miraculously, the baby survived. We’re not sure what caused the bleeding, but one of our possible theories is that the baby is destroying her uterus from inside. All the thrashing around must’ve caused the bleeding. The baby is fine, and so is she, but we don’t know how long for.” Spider-Doc looked through his files, scribbling down things with a pen. “We will be able to run further exams, but only after she wakes up. Most of them require her consent.”
Miguel nodded and sat down next to your bed, holding your hand gently, afraid to break you. The oxygen mask covering your face was far too daunting, a harsh reminder of the state you were in, and how much you were suffering.
“What… What’s the probability of them both making it out alive?” he asked, squeezing your hand.
Spider-Doc sighed.
“We don’t know that yet, but… Miguel, it’s likely it won’t happen. The baby, it’s – it’s getting far too strong. It’s not a regular child because he has your genes. And all of the antidote you’ve been giving your wife, well, it soothes him for a while, but as I’m sure you’ve been told before, the baby is growing immune to it, and it’s only hurting your wife more and more.” He paused, glancing at you. “If we don’t find a way to cure it permanently, you might have to choose between one or the other.”
Miguel’s heart broke at the words.
How was he supposed to choose between the love of his life, and his child? His child, that he’d grown to love in this short period of time. The child he hadn’t gotten the chance to know yet, but still harboured a love as deep as the one he had for you.
But on the other hand, this was the child that was killing you.
He’d always wanted a family. You’d always wanted a family. He remembered the day you told him you were pregnant. How happy the two of you were, celebrating and fantasizing about the future, about your little family.
He’d get to come home to his loving wife and kid at the end of a tiring day, both reminding him of why he did what he did, why he risked his life over and over again for the sake of the multiverse. He’d cradle his baby on his arms, marvelling over how such a small, pure creature could’ve come from imperfect, impure him.
He’d watch you as you sang and rocked your baby to sleep, heart melting at the sight of you being a mother – a look he’d wanted on you ever since you told him you’d like a little family of your own.
And now, it was all going down the drain.
The baby was hurting you.
Miguel was hurting you too, with all those syringes and needles he made sure to insert into you. “It’s for your own good”, he’d say, eyes brimming with tears as you begged him not to. And yet, he insisted on sedating you and giving you the antidote, all to make sure you could keep on living.
Your reasoning started out as “Do it. I don’t mind the pain if our baby is fine” and had quickly changed to “You’re hurting him with your antidote Miguel, please stop.” What was Miguel supposed to do when your reasoning basically contradicted itself? You wanted the best for your child, and so did he. But the very thing that was curing it, was also causing it more harm.
“Is there anything else I can do for you, Miguel?” Spider-Doc asked, tugging the files back under his arm.
“No, thank you Doctor. That’ll be all.”
The doctor nodded and promptly left, allowing Miguel some alone time with his wife.
Usually, he’d make sure no one was there to see him as vulnerable as this. But today, Miguel did not care. The love of his life was dying, and because of the child he’d helped make.
It’s all my fault. I’m a freak. I’m a monster. If it weren’t for me, she’d have a normal pregnancy. She’d have a normal child, a normal family. If it weren’t for me being the monster I am, she wouldn’t be in pain. It’s all my fault. I’m a selfish bastard who should’ve never fallen for her in the first place. I knew I couldn’t give her a normal life like everyone else, so why did I still pursue her? If I truly did love her, I’d have left her alone and let her lead a normal life.
This was the internal monologue going inside Miguel’s head. He allowed himself to cry, big tears rolling down his cheek and falling on the floor. Was it selfish of him? Back when you started dating, you told him you didn’t care about who he was. Spider-Man, big Alchemax genius, saviour of the multiverse. You didn’t care for any of those titles. All you wanted was your Miguel, your Miggy. You told him you’d love him forever, no matter what.
You’d love him in his good days, you’d love him through his bad days. You’d kiss his scars and run your fingers through his head and calm him down. You’d celebrate his victories and comfort him during his losses. You’d be there, no matter what.
“I don’t care what you are, Miggy. I love you. Isn’t that enough?” Those were the words you’d always say to him whenever he tried to reason with you, telling you he was a dangerous man, that he could not provide you with the life you deserved. And you never missed a beat, replying “The life I deserve is with you. The life I want is with you.”
And had he been selfish for wanting that? Had he been selfish for wanting a life with you as well? Had he been selfish for fighting for what he wanted for once in his life, instead of giving it up?
A small, gentle hand tugged at his brown curls, and he looked up to find you staring at him through almost closed eyes. Your chest still rose and fell with your breathing, which seemed more stable now. Miguel couldn’t see the entirety of your face, but he found your eyes and the dam broke.
He sobbed into his hands, shaking his head.
“I’m so sorry… This is all my fault… It’s my fault that I’m such a monster and have cursed our child with my genes…” Having heard this, you pulled on his hair, this time harsher. He looked up and saw your eyebrows furrowed in a frown. You shook your head gently and placed a finger to his lips, shutting him up. Your other hand found your stomach and rubbed circles there.
“If it weren’t for me…” Another harsh tug. He did not need to see the rest of your face to know you’d be scolding him right now if you could. You were never one to throw pity parties – you loved him, you said it often, and you were sure of your decisions.
“I love you,” he said, standing up to press a kiss to your forehead. You closed your eyes and instinctively leaned into his touch. “Get some rest, alright? I’ll be here if you need me.” Saying this, he sat back down on the chair, and quietly watched you.
Later that day, some of your closest friends of the Spider Society would stop to check up on you and wish you well. Peter B. brought Mayday and tried to cheer you up by allowing her to perform a series of stunts (if he could call “swinging around the hospital room with her web-shooter” stunts) and telling you jokes.
Jessica had dropped by your apartment and brought her some spare clothes, as well as some of the things she knew you couldn’t live without – your phone, the books you were currently interested in, and other basic items like a hairbrush and a toothbrush. Miguel hated what that implied – that you’d be in here for a while, long enough for you to need these things, but he was willing to do whatever was best to keep you safe.
Miles and Gwen stopped by too, chatting with you calmly and telling you about whatever shenanigans they had been up to in their respective dimensions. It always cheered you up to listen to those two talk. You loved how vibrant and passionate they were about their job as Spider-People, and they always made you insanely proud.
After a few hours, Miguel ushered everyone away, arguing that you needed peace and quiet. They all promised to come back later, and the two of you were left alone once again.
The Spider-Doctors had allowed you to remove your oxygen mask if you felt up for it, so you placed it near your body and tried to distract Miguel out of his worries.
“I’ve been thinking of a few baby names,” you said, caressing your stomach, an action that had become second nature to you.
“¿En serio?” he mumbled. Miguel had pushed his chair as close to your bed as possible, to make sure he could cater to you at all times and help you if you needed. He was currently laying his head next to your torso, and he was facing you. A rather uncomfortable position, but as long as he got to be next to you, that was all right.
“Yeah. I’ve been thinking, if it’s a boy, we can call him Henry.”
Miguel snorted.
“What’s wrong with Henry?” you asked him, pouting.
“We’re not naming our child Henry.” Miguel deadpanned, raising an eyebrow.
“I think it’s a lovely name.”
“Yes, maybe. But not for our child.”
You huffed, flicking his forehead softly.
“Ouch – hey! What was that for?” He asked, lifting his head ever so slightly.
“You’re not taking this seriously.” You looked away, visibly upset.
“No – no, look at me.” When you refused to do it, Miguel lifted his hand to turn your head towards his, so he could look you in the eye. “Mi vida, I’m sorry. I am taking this seriously. I just personally don’t really like Henry. What are some of your other ideas?”
You huffed again and he had to try and hide his smile. You looked rather adorable like this, even if he would never tell you.
“I like Lucas.”
“Hm.”
“You hate it.”
“I don’t – “
“You do, Miggy, I know it! I can see it in your face – that’s the same expression you had when you tried my mom’s empanadas.” You crossed your arms over your chest.
“Cariño, I love your mother, but those empanadas were terrible.” Miguel calmly replied.
“You’re making that same face now.”
“And how can you be so sure it’s a boy?”
“I told you, I can feel it. Call it maternal instinct.” You smiled, and he couldn’t help but smile with you.
“What do you think about Gabriel?”
Now it was your turn to furrow your brows.
“Gabriel? As in – “
“Yeah.” He looked at your stomach and hesitantly placed a hand on top of it. He wanted so badly to communicate with the baby growing inside of you, apologise to him for making him the way he was, and beg him to please stop hurting you. “What do you think?”
You hummed, and grinned.
“I love it.”
Miguel’s head snapped upwards, and his eyes widened.
“Really?”
“Yeah, I like it. Gabriel. I think it’s lovely.”
Miguel leaned upwards and placed the sweetest of kisses on your lips, savouring the sweetness of your words, your body, your soul.
“Gabriel it is then.”
You two remained in silence for a while, before you decided to speak up once again.
“I can’t wait to meet him.” Your voice was low, and Miguel could sense the sheer adoration and utter love you had for your unborn child. “I can’t wait to hold him, and to see you hold him. I’ve always wanted a family with you.”
Miguel did not speak.
“It’ll be fine, Miggy. Everything will be fine.” It was odd. Usually, it was him who had to comfort you. After all, you were the one lying on a hospital bed. “I love you so much. You know that, right?”
He looked up and offered you a small smile, taking your hand and giving it a kiss.
“I do. I love you too. You, and our baby. I would do anything for the both of you. You know that, don’t you?”
You smiled. A sad smile, that said everything you couldn’t find the words to.
“I do, Miggy.”
You puckered your lips, silently begging him for a kiss, which he obliged you with. He tilted your head upwards and kissed you slowly, tongue lazily tracing your bottom lip before you parted your mouth to welcome him. Although weak, your hands still found strength to clutch his shirt and pull him tighter against you.
“I can’t wait to have a family with you,” you whispered against his lips.
Miguel nodded and slowly untangled himself from your grasp.
“You should rest, my love.”
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After you’d fallen asleep, Miguel exited the hospital room and made his way to his laboratory.
Lyla’s gleaming form appeared before him, taking her heart-shaped glasses so she could see him better.
“Miguel? Is that you?” she asked, disappearing from her spot, and appearing once again right in front of his face. “I heard what happened. I’m really sorry. Shouldn’t you be with her right now?”
“We need to work on a cure.” Miguel ignored her as he walked towards his workstation, glaring at the papers scattered around. Formulas, calculations, drawings, and sheets filled with words. He had to be getting closer to the cure, right? All those sleepless, restless nights couldn’t have been for nothing. Miguel was one of the smartest men in his universe, clearly there must’ve been something he hadn’t tried yet.
“Miguel, we’ve talked about this. You need to go to her,” Lyla sighed. If she could get tired, she would, really. “Jessica and I are still working on the research. We’re trying our hardest, but you have to – “
“We’re running out of time, Lyla!” Miguel yelled, sending the papers flying all over the room. “She’s getting worse. That baby is killing her, Lyla. It’s killing her, and the antidotes I’m coming up with are just hurting her more… You were right…” He placed his hands on his desk, leaning his head on the top. “You were right, the baby is growing immune and making the antidote stronger will only hurt her further… I don’t know what to do anymore…”
Lyla sighed, her figure flickering in the darkness. She appeared once more next to Miguel, looking at the few papers that managed to stay intact. Her holographic fingers ran through a few lines of text, analysing them.
“All of these formulas… You’ve been increasing the power of the antidote… Making it stronger and stronger to sedate the baby as much as you can… You’ve been far too aggressive on your approach, Miguel.”
“What?” he asked, not even daring to look up.
“Yeah, I mean,” Lyla flickered over to other papers, scanning them and reading them a few times, before returning to Miguel’s side and booting up her results to his computer. “Look at this. You’ve been so focused on sedating the baby, you haven’t even tried to build [Y/N]’s defences up.”
Miguel furrowed his brows, glancing at Lyla in disbelief.
“I did that. With patch 3.4. I fortified them, see?” Using his fingers, he tapped away on his screens, zooming in on a few lines and notes, and then sliding the screen so he could see the matching blood results. “See? Look at the white blood cells.”
“Yes, but still, you’re focusing too much on the offensive side of things.” Lyla quickly sparkled before his eyes, and in a flash, she was inserting sketches and drawings on the picture that shone on the screen. She was crossing out words and numbers and letters and replacing them with her own. “Look, over here. You decided to strengthen the defences, but you also doubled down on the sedative effects. You make it strong for yourself because you’re a grown man. We’re talking about a baby here.”
“A baby that is killing my wife.”
“A baby, nevertheless. The baby’s genes are triggering a response in [Y/N]’s body. What if we reprogram her white blood cells, specifically the T cells and natural killers cells, to recognise and neutralise the foreign elements?” Lyla turned to him and removed her sunglasses.
“We’re not messing with my wife’s genetic code, Lyla. That is out of the question.” Miguel knew the price one had to pay for such a thing. And he wasn’t about to risk your well-being. Who knew what could happen should he try to do something as drastic?
“But what if we don’t have to? We can reinforce the white blood cells in the antidote. We can tweak the core essence of the antidote itself, with Essence Cells – tiny protectors we can unleash to recalibrate the energy balance between her. They’ll form a shield that actively repels the negative influence from the baby’s unique energy pattern.”
Miguel placed a hand on his chin, going over what Lyla had told him.
It was true, he’d been far too preoccupied with tackling the baby issue. But he also knew that strengthening your defences could cause the baby to get stronger and stronger as opposed to stagnate.
“Essence Cells? Can we really do that?”
Lyla shrugged.
“It’s a stretch, but we’re dealing with extraordinary circumstances. If we manipulate the energy signatures in her bloodstream, we might create a defensive barrier that counteracts the harm all of the baby has been doing.”
Miguel faced his papers once again.
“It’s a long shot Miguel, but at this point, what do you have to lose?”
“I can lose [Y/N] – “
“What’s fortifying her defences gonna make? Worst case scenario, her immune system grows.”
Miguel stared at the screen. He remained silent.
“It wouldn’t hurt to try.” Lyla voiced one last time.
It wouldn’t. If it worked, you’d be safe. The baby would be safe.
If it didn’t, he’d at least buy you more time.
And prolong your suffering, a little voice whispered in his head.
He shook that nasty thought away.
“Let’s do it.”
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You’d been doing fine.
You’d been healthy, colour had returned to your cheeks, and you seemed to be healing just fine. The baby hadn’t caused much trouble, sometimes kicking you harder than a normal baby should, but, overall, behaving.
The new antidote mix seemed to be working.
Miguel was currently sitting by your side, reading your favourite book out loud. You claimed you were “far too tired” to pick it up, but Miguel knew you simply liked the cadence of his voice. No matter. He’d read to you as many times as you wanted if it meant you’d be fine.
“You sound so nice,” you mumbled, eyes slowly closing. You were close to falling asleep, although it wasn’t even near 3PM. Sure, you were healing, but having a baby that shared 50% of his genes with your vampire-ninja-spiderman husband (as Miles so charmingly put it) was tiresome, and you found yourself exhausted even before lunch time on most days.
“I’m sure the baby likes to hear you too,” you yawned. Miguel smiled at the sight. Although not the ideal location, this is all Miguel has ever wanted for you. A quiet, peaceful, healthy pregnancy with him catering to your every need, and you just sitting pretty as not to strain yourself much.
“I can’t wait to hear him,” rubbing the sleep away from your eyes, you sit up – or rather, try to. Miguel is next to you in milliseconds, propping you up with pillows and making sure you were comfortable.
“This alright?” he asked, fluffing up a pillow behind you.
“Perfect,” you smiled and kissed his jaw affectionately. “You know, I’ve been thinking.”
“That’s never good,” he chided with a fake worried expression.
“Ha ha, very funny. But I wanna get out of here.”
Miguel took a sharp breath.
“I know what you’re gonna say, Miggy, but I need to get out. Just for a while. I can walk, you know? I’m tired of being in this damn hospital bed for so long. I promise it’ll be fine; you can even come with me! Please? Exercising is good for the baby.”
“[Y/N]…” Miguel sighed, reaching out to hold your face.
You were quicker though and held his hands with your own.
“Please, Miguel. You can accompany me or chaperone me, or whatever you want to call it. But I’ve been getting better, and all I want is to move around a bit. I’ll be fine. And after we go for a walk, I’ll return to bed, I promise.”
Miguel looked into your pleading eyes and saw how badly you needed this. You’d been lying in a hospital bed for a few weeks now, after lying in your own bed at home for a few months. It wasn’t the greatest lifestyle, and how could he deny you something so simple? Two voices in his head fought against each other, one of them telling him that it was a terrible idea. The other one, however, assured him that you needed to get out and get some fresh air, because it’d be good for both you and your baby.
“Alright my love. Let’s go.”
You’d never been happier as you walked (waddled, more like) around the Spider Society with Miguel by your side. Ever the protective husband, he held your hand and kept you close, offering you any help around every 5 minutes.
Spider-People approached, gushed over your big baby bump, asked standard questions such as if you knew the gender, if you’d been thinking about names, and wishing you all the best in your pregnancy. Those who knew about your condition asked if the antidote had been working and offered to keep you company at the Medical Centre, which you gladly accepted.
Once you got to the cafeteria area, Miguel had to nearly physically restrain you, seeing as you almost ran to the empanada stall, claiming you were super hungry, and nothing except those godly cafeteria empanadas could soothe your craving.
“We’ll get you one, but you need to sit down,” Miguel said, placing his hands on your shoulders.
“Look at that line! Miggy, they’ll be out of empanadas before we get there! We need to hurry!” You huffed.
Miguel chuckled and kissed your forehead, before leading you to a nearby table.
“Sit here and I’ll bring you the empanada. Okay?”
You nodded eagerly and waited for your husband to return.
After a while, Miguel came back, holding a few boxes – he wasn’t going to risk it. He knew you, and if you said you craved one empanada, what you actually meant was I’m craving a whole bunch of them. He noticed the small crowd that had gathered around you and had half a mind to send them all away, before he noticed who they were.
“I’m so glad you’re doing better, [Y/N].” Gwen Stacy said.
“Yeah – you got us all worried, you know?” Miles replied.
You smiled, having grown very fond of the kids. In a way, you saw them as your own children.
“Thank you. I’m getting better now – all thanks to Miguel. He’s a genius. Oh! Speak of the devil!” You reached out your hands and Miguel promptly handed you one of the empanada bags. You squealed in delight and opened the bag, wasting no time in sinking your teeth into it.
“Hmm – this is so good,” you groaned, mouth full (earning a side glance from Miguel). You finished chewing your bite and cleaned your mouth, and then turned to him. “Thank you, honey. Gosh, I really missed these.”
Gwen and Miles chuckled as they watched you chew on your empanada contentedly, and Miguel silently thanked whoever was watching over him for this moment. He felt normal for once. Just a husband taking care of his wife’s cravings and watching as she appeared to glow.
Things had been bad for a while, but thankfully, they were getting better. You were getting better.
“Miguel! Miguel, look!” Gwen shouted, breaking him out of his trance and pointing at you. He turned his head, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and that’s when he saw you.
The empanada had been forgotten and dropped on the floor, and you were panting, out of breath. One of your hands was placed on your stomach, the other was holding onto the bench for support.
“[Y/N]!” Miguel was immediately by your side, looking at you and accessing what was happening.
“Shit – shit, it hurts, Miggy. It hurts so much!” Tears were streaming down your cheeks, and a pained expression overtook your face. Before he could ask you what specifically hurt, you were letting out a horrifying scream and falling on the floor. Miguel’s reflexes were quicker and you instead fell on his lap, where he cradled you tightly against him.
You screamed and shrieked, Spider-People all around you stopping to glance at what was happening. Pavitr kneeled next to you in panic, holding your hand and encouraging you to squeeze it tightly, which you did (let it be known that he took it like a champ, focusing on you rather than on the pain you caused him). You turned to Miggy and sobbed, trying to explain what you felt, the way he always told you to do whenever you hurt.
Unfortunately, the pain was far too much to endure, and every two words from you were interrupted by ear-piercing wails.
Miguel didn’t want to leave you. Not at all. He wasn’t going to leave you alone while you suffered and cried in his arms. But he needed to get to his lab as soon as possible, and he couldn’t do that with you. He couldn’t possibly risk hurting you.
In a split second, he made a decision he never thought he’d ever make in his life.
“Peter, Hobie, Pavitr, take [Y/N] back to the Medical Centre.”
“Miguel, no – “ you sobbed, clutching onto his suit.
“Mi vida, I need to go to my lab and reach your files – “
“No – “ You flashed a thousand colours in front of him. Chunky blocks of colour replaced your figure and rearranged it repeatedly. You felt lightweight in his arms, and his heart sunk at the realisation. He’d felt this weight before, held it as its colours sparked dimmer and dimmer.
You were glitching. Again.
Panic overtook him, clouding his judgement.
Shock. What was he going to do? Why were you glitching? He’d stopped giving you that patch of antidote he’d gotten from another universe. Hell, he’d promised never to return there after you’d glitched the first time.
So, what in the world was causing this?
“Miguel?”
Why were you suffering?
“Miguel?”
Hadn’t you suffered enough? Was this the world’s cruel way of punishing him?
“Miguel!”
It was Peter B.’s voice that brought him back to reality.
“We need to get her to the Medical Centre. You go to your lab and find a cure. Now.”
Miguel didn’t need to be told twice. He held you tightly one more time, kissed your forehead when your frame stopped sparkling, and all but ran to his lab.
Once he got there, Lyla flickered in front of him, pixelated eyes widening in fear.
“Miguel!”
He looked up and saw as she returned to his keyboard and pointed at the screen.
“The Essence Cells are causing a temporal instability in [Y/N]’s physiology.” She exclaimed, typing away.
Miguel huffed; face contorted in anger. “I thought you said this was safe, you said the worst that could happen – “
“I had no idea this would happen! Miguel, it wasn’t supposed to! But it’s too late for that, we need to work on a cure.” Lyla appeared in front of the screen and urgently pointed at it. “[Y/N]’s sense of time is becoming warped. She might be experiencing moments from different timelines, different realities. It’s as if the Essence Cells are opening windows to parallel words within her. But this wasn’t supposed to happen. [Y/N] hasn’t been exposed to any other dimensions or universes. Ever. Not before, not during her pregnancy. This is completely unexpected.”
Lyla’s words sunk in.
She hasn’t been exposed to any other dimensions or universes.
“Mierda,” he whispered, nearly collapsing on her knees.
Lyla knew what that expression meant. She knew what that voice meant, and she did not like it one bit.
“Miguel…?” she asked tentatively. “What have you done…?”
He shook his head and glanced at his hands. Was it his fault then? Was this all his fault? Perhaps if he hadn’t given you that foreign antidote, you’d be fine now. The Essence Cells would do their job, and you wouldn’t be suffering. It’s all his fault.
“Miguel, tell me what you’ve done, now. The quicker we know what the problem is, the better we can deal with it!”
“I… I travelled to another dimension…” he mumbled; voice numb. “It was a few months ago, I… I was desperate and reached out to another me, a better me… He gave me this antidote, said it wouldn’t fail… Lyla, I was desperate – I didn’t want to lose [Y/N]! I didn’t know what else to do!” When Miguel finally looked up, Lyla could see he was crying.
His next words carried all the heartbreak he felt, and even with no feelings, Lyla felt something resembling a heart breaking inside of her.
“I didn’t want to lose her, Lyla. I was desperate. It’s all my fault now, isn’t it?”
Yes, it was, but Lyla was not about to tell that to her clearly very disturbed boss. Instead, she did what she did best.
She got to work.
“You’re an idiot, Miguel O’Hara,” she sighed in exasperation before taking a deep breath. “But you already know that. Now, stand up and stop moping around. Your wife and child need your help.”
Miguel looked up at her, like a lost puppy being offered a home.
“Do you want to save your wife or not? Get up and let’s work!”
Something switched inside of Miguel. Maybe it was the way Lyla did not hold him accountable, maybe it was the determination in her voice, but one thing was for sure: he was going to save you, no matter what.
“Alright.” He stood up, making his way to his work bench in two strides. “What do we need to do?”
“We need to recalibrate the Essence Cells – tweak their energy signatures. If we can stabilize Mary’s temporal fluctuations, maybe we can minimize these glimpses into alternate realities.”
“More Essence Cells aren’t the solution – they’re making everything worse. The Essence Cells must still be reacting to whatever remnants of the other antidote still remain in her body. She hasn’t glitched in a while, so maybe they’re dying out, but I can’t risk it. We can’t.” Miguel mumbled, scribbling over more papers, and comparing them.
“Okay, what about changing our approach?”
“We’ve done that before, Lyla, and it didn’t work, and [Y/N] is in pain, and – “
“Stop being so stubborn and listen to me!” Lyla yelled. “Remember to keep your heart out of this – you’re a scientist, remember? Be logical. Instead of amplifying, we need to anchor. Maybe the Essence Cells are intensifying the glimpses because they’re acting like amplifiers. We introduced them to strengthen her defences, remember? They’re amplifying her immune system. Maybe we need something more stable.”
Miguel nodded. She was right. He needed to remain clear-headed – panicking would not do. Logic and reason would help him. “You might be right – but what could possibly anchor these fluctuations without harming her? Lyla, we’ve tried about everything.”
Lyla chewed on her little pixelated pencil.
She flickered all around the lab, appearing and disappearing in front of papers. She scanned some and left others alone. She organised all the information that proved to be relative, before pasting it to Miguel’s computer.
“Of course!” She cried out. “How did I not thing of this before?”
“What? What is it?” ´
“Miguel, your blood!” Lyla appeared in front of him, nodding so vigorously, her heart-shaped glasses fell off. “It carries your genes, doesn’t it? If we use a controlled amount of your blood, we might be able to create an antidote that stabilizes the Essence Cells, anchoring [Y/N]’s experience to a single reality!”
Miguel frowned. He hadn’t thought about using his blood. In his head, it meant he’d be injecting some more of the same genes that were hurting you in your body.
“I don’t understand. How could my blood possibly work?”
“Your blood contains the original genetic code we’re trying to counteract. By introducing it in a carefully measured way, we can neutralize the amplifying effect of the Essence Cells – “
“And stabilize [Y/N]’s physiology.”
“Exactly! And that’s not the only thing – with your blood, we can create an antidote that not only stabilises her condition, but also creates a protective barrier around the baby!”
“My genes were what got us in this whole mess in the first place,” Miguel mumbled. “But perhaps by using it, we can design the antidote to shield the baby from the harmful aspects of her glitching, while still allowing the natural and healthy development of their unique traits. My unique traits. Lyla, you’re a genius!” Miguel shouted, swinging towards another one of his work benches, this one filled with vials and needles.
“I know, I know. But say it one more time, just to make sure you mean it!”
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A few members of the Spider Society gushed and worried about you, refusing to leave your side. Pavitr still held your hand, even though his was turning purple and getting numb. Gwen slowly petted your head, keeping you grounded by telling you stories and anecdotes about her day. Hobie was trying his best too – he had a soft spot for you and tried to make you laugh every few minutes, just to make sure you were okay.
The glitching had stopped for a while, but not completely. You thought of them as contractions that took longer and longer to come as time went by. Just where the hell was your sweet Miguel?
Almost as if answering your prayers, he burst in the room, holding a needle in his hand. Everyone immediately got out of his way, and he kneeled next to you. He pressed a soft kiss on your forehead and scanned your face for any further injuries, which you did not seem to have. Good. If all went according to plan, you wouldn’t feel any pain any longer.
“I’m here, mi vida, I’m here.” He whispered softly, guiding your arm towards his chest.
“Miggy, it hurts,” you whispered back, dry tears staining your lovely cheeks. He kissed each, before settling the needle on top of your skin. “I don’t want it to hurt again, please don’t….”
“I know, my love, I know. But I have to do this.” Miguel placed his forehead against yours. “It’ll stop. I promise, it’ll stop. You’ve been so brave up until now, haven’t you? You’ve been so brave for our child. It’ll be so lucky to call you mother.”
“Gabriel.” You nodded, trying not to tear up again.
“Yeah, Gabriel. He’ll be so lucky to call you his mother.” Miguel wiped the sweat out of your brow, slowly pushing the needle inside of you. You winced in pain and shrieked, back arching off the bed as the baby inside you stirred and stirred. Miguel ignored your cries and pushed through. You needed this, you needed this antidote, because this one would work. After so many failed attempts, this was the antidote patch that would finally work.
Miguel wasn’t quite sure what he’d do if it did not.
He prayed to whoever deity was up there, and watched as you slowly regained your breath and laid down on the hospital bed once more. Your posture was relaxed, calm. It was as if a big weight was lifted off your body.
“My love?” Miguel asked, brushing some strands off hair from your face. “How are you feeling?”
He was expecting any kind of reaction. Tears, screaming, silence.
Nothing prepared him for what happened next.
You started to laugh.
To laugh.
To truly laugh, after so long.
You giggled and giggled, hands reaching around your belly.
“I’m – I’m amazing, Miggy!” You laughed and looked at him, with tears in your eyes. But this time, they were tears of happiness. “I hadn’t felt this great since before I was pregnant!” You laughed again and nuzzled his nose with your own. You ignored everyone else in the room and smiled as your husband took your face in his hands and kissed your breath away. You responded with just as much fervour, stopping mid-kiss to chuckle. “I feel amazing, Miguel. Thank you. Thank you so much. You did it. I can feel it my love, you did it.”
Miguel let a few tears of relief roll down his cheeks. You kissed them away and invited him to place his hands on top of your belly.
“Can you feel it?”
Miguel raised an eyebrow.
“Not much. Are they supposed to be kicking?”
“No,” you smiled, shaking your head, “Not at all. He’s calmed down. All thanks to you.”
Miguel kneeled once again and smiled.
You were doing fine. You were well, and so was your baby.
Later, Spider-Doc would come to bring the results of your new analysis. The baby, even though still carried Miguel’s genes, now did so with stability. He was healthy and you were no longer glitching.
All was well.
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Until you were dragged to the same hospital room a few weeks later.
Miguel doesn’t remember much.
It was honestly all very fuzzy.
All he does remember though, are a bunch of voices yelling at each other, and how he had refused to leave your side. Hell would freeze over before he even considered leaving you.
“[Y/N], we’re going to need you to push now, is that okay?” your delivery nurse (a Spider-Woman, since Miguel refused any other hospital to see you – after all, the Spider Society had the best doctors – and, well, best everythings.)
You nodded, sweat clinging to your whole body. Miguel was next to you, and you were holding his hand as tight as you could.
“C’mon mi amor, you can do this. You can do this, alright?”
“Mhm!” You whimpered.
“Ready? One, two, three – “
You screamed, pushing as hard as you possibly could. Your eyes were watery, and you were shaking your head repeatedly, begging for this torment to stop.
“One more time [Y/N], come on!” The nurse repeated, looking at you and nodding encouragingly.
“Uh-oh,” Spider-Doc blurted behind Miguel, which made the latter tense up immediately. Uh-Oh? What did he mean, Uh-oh?
“The baby’s oxygen levels are low; we may need to intervene.”
“What?” Miguel’s head turned in the doctor’s direction. “What’s happening? Doctor, what’s happening to my wife?! Tell me!”
Spider-Doc looked at the other doctors in the room, and they all nodded at the same time.
“Get him out of the room.”
“What?!”
“Miggy!” You cried, not letting go of his hand.
“Miguel, you need to leave right now, we can’t have you in here. You’ll just cause more complications, add stress to the doctors, and consequently, your wife.”
“Doc, with all due respect, there’s no way I’m going to abandon her when she needs me the most.”
That was the last thing Miguel said before the door’s room was slammed in his face.
Well. So much for never abandoning you.
“Pendejo de mierda…”
Miguel sat down, leaning his back against the wall, and staring at the ceiling. There was nothing he wanted more than to be in that room with you, holding your hand and promising you all was going to be fine. He was your husband, for shock’s sake. He wanted to protect you, and he sure as hell couldn’t do it from outside the room.
He turned his head and tried to listen to whatever noises might be coming from inside. The soundproof qualities of the hospital seemed to be proving useful, since he couldn’t make out a thing – which only made him even more nervous. What if you were scared? Panicked? What if you needed him? What if the doctors needed anything? Any information on your blood type, on your pregnancy? He had all these answers.
And most importantly, he wanted to be there for you.
After what seemed like an eternity, the door next to him opened ever so slightly.
Spider-Doc looked around, before settling his gaze on the ground next to him.
“Miguel?” he asked, to which the other man immediately stood up upon hearing.
“Yes? Is everything okay? How is my wife? Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine.” Spider-Doc smiled, opening the door more, and making way for Miguel could come through. “There were a few complications with the baby, namely, the umbilical cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck. That’s why the oxygen levels were low. Thankfully, we intervened at the right time. Your wife is fine, and so is your baby.”
Miguel sighed deeply in relief. The weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulders. That’s all he wanted to hear.
“And, according to her, your presence is needed. Urgently.”
He did not wait a second before walking inside the room, looking around to access his surroundings. No one seemed to be panicking, there were no nervous nurses and doctors rushing about. And then he heard it.
The piercing cry that seemed to come from one of the extremities of the room.
He approached, carefully, almost as if scared. After all, he wasn’t sure of what he was going to find. But whatever he might’ve thought about, did not hold a candle to the real thing.
In the hospital bed next to him, were you, lying down. Your forehead was glistening with sweat and your breath was still evening out. Your eyes were red and puffy, and so were your lips, from all the tears you’d spilled. When you looked up at him, they sparkled again, threatening to water once more.
“Hey,” you whispered, meeting his eyes.
“Hey,” Miguel replied, staying still.
“Come meet your son,” you said and looked at the baby neatly bundled near your chest. Miguel stepped forward, and if his breath hadn’t been stolen before, it definitely was now.
Close to you, you held a tiny, tiny little baby. There were a few strands of curly brown hair on top of his head, and his eyes were closed, tiny fists closed in the same fashion. He wailed them around, shattering cries erupting from his throat. How come such a small baby could make so much noise?
You shushed him softly, caressing his cheek and whispering soothing words. The baby seemed to listen, because he became quietly right after, big, sparkling eyes coming to stare at you curiously.
“They’re yours,” Miguel nearly choked out, stepping forward. “Our baby has your eyes.”
You smiled at your husband and nodded, cooing at your child.
“He’s perfect, isn’t he?”
Miguel’s eyes widened.
“He?”
He could barely believe it.
“Told you. Maternal instinct is never wrong,” you chuckled, gushing at how your son held onto your finger as if it were his lifeline. “Would you like to hold him?”
Miguel nodded, and you carefully handed the baby to him. Big, bad, scary Miguel O’Hara was melting as he held his teeny tiny baby in his arms for the first time.
“Careful with the head,” you chided softly, to which he obliged.
Miguel stared at the baby in his arms. Well, more like the baby in his hands. He was so big; his hands almost covered his tiny body entirely. Miguel brought him close, smiling. The baby’s tiny lips were opened, eyes almost as if scrutinizing his father. Miguel chuckled at the sight – a few minutes old, and he was proving to be just like him already.
Miguel looked between the baby and you.
“Gabriel,” he whispered, searching for recognition in your eyes.
You granted him just that, accompanied by a smile.
“Gabriel. Little Gabriel O’Hara. He looks just like you, doesn’t he?”
Miguel nodded. He pulled up a chair and sat next to your bed, still holding little Gabriel. You reached out to him, tracing patterns on his arm.
“He’s perfect, [Y/N]. He’s just perfect. Thank you so much. I thought you’d given me the greatest gift I could’ve ever asked for when we first got married,” he took his eyes off Gabriel to glance at you. “But like always, you’ve managed to surprise me. You gave me a son.”
Your smile widened and used your free hand to caress the baby’s small head.
“I’m sorry I gave you so much trouble,” he continued, voice dropping in agony. “If it weren’t for me… If it weren’t for these bloody genes…”
“Shh – don’t say another word.”
“[Y/N], please, you must know – “
“I won’t hear it.” You looked at him directly in his eyes. Those lovely, lovely brown eyes that you loved waking up to, and had sometimes even fantasized about your son inheriting. “I love you, Miguel. All of you. And I would do it all again if it meant I got to have you and our son right here, right now. You were right, it all worked out. Everything is fine. I have you, and I have our son. Our little Gabriel. And everything’s going to be alright.”
Miguel teared up himself.
Had this been his reward? What had he done to ever deserve you? Whatever it was, he was forever grateful.
He gazed down upon his son, who seemed to have fallen asleep. Gabriel’s dark eyelashes rested peacefully on top of his cheeks, and his pouty lips were slightly parted. He was perfect. Perfect in every way. He looked every bit like himself – but there was a soften on his features that reminded him of him.
“He seems so peaceful. You can’t fool me you little rascal, I know the troubles you caused your mother. You’ll pay for it someday,” Miguel joked, earning a giggle from you.
“He’s every bit like his father then. You’ve gotten me some troubles yourself, mister.”
“That I have.”
You two remained like this, in silence, for a few minutes, basking in this beautiful moment. It had been a rocky road, but you’d made it. Here you were, still standing, safe and sound. And here was your little Gabriel, resting peacefully on his arms.
Everything was right as it should be.
“I love you.” Miguel spoke. There were no words to describe what he was feeling now, but he thought this was a good way to start. “I love you so much. I love you and our son and our little family. Thank you so much for all you’ve done for me.”
“I love you too Miguel. And our son.” You smiled. Shock, you looked marvellous. You always looked beautiful, and he was sure he’d never seen you look so beautiful first when you got married, then on your wedding night, and then the day you told him you were pregnant. But right here, right now – this was the most beautiful he’d ever seen you.
“I’ll take care of you two forever, mi vida. Te lo prometo. I’ll be by your side until the end of time.” He reached out to wrap an arm around you, bringing you as close to his body as he could without hurting you.
Miguel had always been a truthful man.
But right now, as he held the entire world in both his arms, he swore he had never been so truthful as he pledged his undying love for you and Gabriel.
“You saved me, Miguel.” You mumbled, turning your face away from your son to look him in the eye. “You were my antidote after all.”
Miguel shook his head, kissing your forehead. You were terribly corny – a trait he found immensely charming in you.
“And you were mine.”
Everything was just fine.
Miguel had you, and his son.
He had you and Gabriel.
Everything was perfect.
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A/N: And that's it! That's the ending! I hope that you guys liked it, and that it lived up to your expectations. I definitely missed writing for Miggy! My requests are open, so feel free to send in any ideas you might have for him! I'm excited to see what you guys have in mind!
Anyway, thank you all, and I hope you have a wonderful day ahead!
Taglist
@tarjapearce , @estella-satn , @meganswife , @cold-blooded-girls , @marcswife21 , @edgycatx
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bones4thecats · 1 month
Note
Hello! If you're still doing requests, could I ask for a angst (or fluff if you think that it works better) of Leona, Vil, Malleus, and/or Lilla (if I could do 4) reacting to Male!Reader having the Unique Magic of a Empathic Healer. This spell would allow the reader to heal any and all wounds inflicted on whom he's trying to healing. However, rather than creating blot to patch up the wounds, they are instead transferred onto the Reader, making it like he was the one that got the wound instead. He is well aware of the dangers and still can't stop himself because he hates people being hurt if he had the power to stop it.
I hope that this was good! Thank you for reading it at least!
M! S/O With A Emphatic Healer! UM.
Type of Writing: Request Name: M! S/O With A Emphatic Healer! Unique Magic (UM.) Characters: Leona Kingscholar, Vil Schoenheit, Malleus Draconia, and Lilia Vanrouge Requester: @beawesome04
A/N: This is fairly angsty with fluff at the ending of each, by the way, this is by far one of my best and favorite requests ever received! I loved the prompt and how you described everything! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this!!
P.S.: For Lilia's part, I used his General! Self
⚠️ TW: Swearing, mentions of war and harm ⚠️ Spoilers for: Books 2 and 7 ⚠️
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Male! Reader ; Reader Heals Leona From Overblot
🦁 Leona was sorer than he ever has been in his entire life
🦁 Opening his eyes with a massive groan, he could hear the sounds of crying and whimpers while people both yelled and ordered people in different ways, this large amount of sounds made his ears pucker down towards his skull as his eyesight became clearer
🦁 Looking at the sky, Leona noticed that a small amount of liquid dripped onto his face, making him slightly flinch and fully open his eyes, catching the sight of a large cut forming onto his boyfriend’s forehead
🦁 His eyes widened as he lunged upwards and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest as he asked you what you were doing
" I- I just wanted you to be okay… " " Y'know what your unique magic does to you, Y/N! I may be okay, but you'd be damaged just as badly, you dumbass! " " It's better me than you. " " No! It was my fault for letting my emotions control me so easily, not yours! "
🦁 Leona furrowed his eyebrows as you began to crack and start crying as he held you closely, then he noticed that you had quite a few bruises and burns from no doubt healing others and him
🦁 As his eyesight began to slosh over with tears of his own, he gripped your tighter, minding where you had injuries. And as he noticed you begin to sob harder, his tail wrapped around your leg protectively
" Leona- I mean, Housewarden? " " What? " " Is he alright? " " He'll be fine… but he might need to heal himself. I’ll take 'em to the nurse. " " You better get fixed up yourself, Leona! " " Yeah, yeah… "
🦁 Looking down at your frail form, Leona sighed internally. What did he, a lazy and arrogant second-born prince, do to deserve your caring and comforting self?
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Male! Reader ; Reader Helps Heal Others From A Poison-Blast
👑 Vil knew that you cared for others, and he also would scold you whenever you would end up in some bad spots because of your care for others. But this was too far
👑 He understood that other students outside of certain dorms, Pomefiore and Diasomnia, weren’t the best when it comes to handling poisons and other dangerous concoctions, but this was officially topping any kind of incident he had ever seen before
👑 A second-year had accidentally splashed something into their cauldron which resulted in a poisonous 'bomb' that had affected multiple of the members in their class
👑 And because you hated seeing people being hurt, you had jumped in and began to help others with the poison by using your unique magic
👑 This healed them, but resulted in the poisoning affecting you instead
👑 Now Vil was staring down as you as you drank multiple poison-antidotes in order for your body to heal more naturally
" What were you thinking, Y/N? " " I’m sorry, Vil. But, I couldn’t just watch as they suffered from such pain. You know what my weaknesses are! "
👑 Sighing and running his hands down your bandage-wrapped arms as he sat down next to you, Vil began to hum a small tune that he had heard over the radio a few days prior
👑 He knew you liked this song, and you smiled gently and grabbed his hand, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles. Vil just looked into your eyes and loosened his stance slightly
" Just- don’t get over your head like this again, please… " " I promise on my collection of photo-albums of us. " " Good answer, Meine Liebe. "
( Meine Liebe = German for "My Love" )
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Male! Reader ; Healing Yuu From Leona’s Overblot
🐉 Malleus was not amused when you jumped into the battle against Leona’s overblot state and began to try healing others, as he knew how dangerous your unique magic was to yourself
🐉 He then began to use his magic to levitate others into the healer’s direction, but he tried to get them away from you
🐉 Unfortunately, you had found the injure-ridden magicless prefect, Yuu Sei, on the ground and you began to use your magic faster than Riddle would be to behead someone for taking his strawberry tart
🐉 He looked around and noticed that Yuu was waking as your once-clean frame was being tattered with bruises and scratches alike all from the human
🐉 When he finally was able to pull you away from everyone else, he began to use his own magic to heal you, his eyebrows furrowed as he silently worked away on each cut, bruise, and injury alike
🐉 Once finished, he looked into your eyes and sighed deeply before embracing you tightly as he burrowed his face into your neck and took in your scent
" Why…? " " Why what, Mal? " " Why risk your own life for a human's? " " You and I both know that Yuu has value. One beyond many of us', they make me want to protect them more than any other mortal, well- besides Sebek and Silver, I suppose. "
🐉 He watched as you began to debate with yourself as your injuries faded away second-by-second. A small smile overtook his features as he hugged you again and you embraced him back
" I love you, my Healing Beauty. " " And I love you, my Darling Prince. "
( Men can be beautiful too. Bite me. )
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Male! Reader ; Healing Him During the Fae v. Human War
🦇 Groaning in pain as he held his side while you hid beside him, Lilia felt the slight amount of blood begin to fall from his midsection. These damned mortals were getting more powerful by the second
🦇 Hopefully the others were doing just as well as before… he cannot afford to lose any more men in this treacherous war
🦇 He turned as he heard you move and roll your uniform’s sleeves up as you pushed your butterfly mask aside and began to chant your small unique spell’s name
" Y/N… what- what are you doing?! You know what that damned spell does to you! " " I don’t care at the moment, Lilia. Your health matters more. " " Bullshit! Y/N, I’ll be fine, just step aside and let me- " " Lilia. As your spouse I will heal you, no matter what. "
🦇 Giving in as you stared at him deadly, Lilia watched as your arms began to glow with many symbols of healing, from ones ranging from those in the burning Savannah to ones in your homeland of Briar Valley
🦇 He then watched as the pain began to fade from his side, but he also noticed how you began to look faint. And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t feeling bad
" Love, I'm fine now. The bleeding isn’t as bad as before, it should heal faster… take a break- please. " " Alright… "
🦇 Laying back on the tree, Lilia tore open a satchel that was once thrown aside by one of the previous human soldiers, he ran towards you and began to apply both alcohol to his and yours minor wound that was slightly leaking blood before wrapping them in gauze
" Alright, we should be fine now. Do you feel better, Mango? " " Yeah, thanks Lils. " " No problem, Dearest. "
( Fun facts: Butterflies symbolize rebirth, transformation, and the delicate balance between life and death & Mangos are one of a bat’s favorite fruits )
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sykestarot · 5 months
Text
what is your destiny?
1-2-3 (left to right)
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I DO NOT OWN THESE IMAGES
Hi everyone, welcome to this weeks reading! I was called to do a destiny reading this week! Lmk if it resonates! Also I wanna credit the artist for these pictures that I used! They are Gawki here on tumblr and Instagram I just really loved the style of these unicorns. Anyways enjoy and thanks for stopping by!
Pile 1
"force my eyes into the pictures" (6 of swords; 4 of wands (rx); ace of pentacles; 7 of cups (rx); 8 of pentacles; The Hermit) Hi pile 1! I hope you guys are doing well! For you guys I see that you have a hard time either accepting your destiny or you don’t believe that destiny is at play. In terms of you believing that you make everything happen in your life. However I see that you’ve been trying to start new journeys for yourself and they haven’t exactly been panning out or been as lucrative as you thought they would be. That’s because your destiny in this lifetime is to learn flow and let things come to you. For example maybe you really wanted a promotion and you worked extra hard all of the time for it but someone else got the promotion you wanted without even trying because they were in a state of receiving. I’m not sure if this is making sense because the universe doesn’t not want you to work hard, it’s more like take a break and see what comes to you during that break. If you are constantly manifesting then there is no room to reap the benefits of your manifestations. I hope that makes sense, however in this reading I do feel underlying notes of you feeling like you're destined to be married to your work and be alone romantically, maybe even in terms of friends. This is another example of you not having space for other people because you put your work so far ahead of everything else including yourself. Are you a Capricorn? LOL. But I feel like you’ve lived many lives like this so in this life it’s time to put less value on monetary possessions and material things. Nurture your emotional self and you will be paid back more than you could ever imagine. Stop fighting against the grain and go with it. Work with the universe and yourself, not just the societal norms that you think you should be doing. I see you have a beautiful big house but it’s empty and you don't feel fulfilled because you don’t have anyone to enjoy it with you know? I believe in you though Pile 1! You can totally do it! Signs: youthful; cars; f1; soft grass; ponies; daisies; cameras; photography; 777; calabasas; office building; new york flat; city lights; bustling streets
Pile 2
"is it wrong of me to want this?" (queen of pentacles; ace of pentacles; 2 of swords; 10 of wands (rx); two of cups; 9 of wands (rx)) Hello pile 2!! Your energy is so fun and fresh. I’ve been cheesing the whole time I was channeling. Anyways about your destiny, did you just meet a romantic prospect recently? Or maybe you have a new coworker or friend in your circle?? I know you can feel the tension between the two of you. This is a heavily destined connection for you in this life, I feel like you and this have felt each other's energy for a long time but now you are in physical proximity to each other and you can just cut the tension with a knife. Now I don’t want you to feel any type of pressure to feel you have to be with this person in case you or them aren’t ready for anything but you guys are meant to cross paths now for a reason. There’s not much I can say on the way the relationship will play out and be in the future for you but I can say that this person will teach you how to let down your walls and trust again. Maybe you’ve been alone for a long time, or had a really bad break up that changed how you function sexually, or emotionally. This person is here to show you a softness that you’ve forgotten. I also feel like this person wants to worship the ground you walk on because they just can sense the divine energy you carry. I also feel the need to tell you that you do deserve a person who worships all that you do because you have done so much work in this life, whether for yourself or for others. You deserve to be the center of someone else’s universe just like how you make other people the center of yours. Also I do feel like this person watches you on social media and just adores everything that you do. I’m not getting creepy energy and this definitely feels reciprocal for both of you. This person wants to give you the world on a silver platter. They also want you to be able to feel safe enough to be vulnerable and they will go at your pace and match you where you are. They feel that you’ve been hurt before and just want to kiss it better. But also they wanna do so many 18+ things with you. Like genuinely they find you to be irresistible, but I feel like they just love everything you do pile 2! Signs: red energy; sexual tension; love; musical theater; red lipstick; opera; singers?; dark rooms; red wine; femme fatale; high heels; soft touches; stolen glances
Pile 3
"ooh i care i care i care" (2 of swords (rx); king of cups (rx); 7 of wands; 8 of wands; ace of swords (rx); Death (rx)) Hi Pile 3! So this one’s a bit of a harder message so please take a moment before you read and check on yourself if you are ready to receive this message. No hard feelings if you can’t! Always put your mental health first. Now I’ll hop into the message at hand. I see for you guys your destiny is to accept the changes in your life. However I see that for most of the changes in your life you have refused to accept them and then blamed the universe for hating you. You actively choose not to change and wonder why there is no growth in your life. I feel like you are tired of how monotonous your life is but you choose to not add any color to it. I can feel your want to go and change things but you are frozen in fear of change for whatever reason. Change overall is a very scary prospect, especially if you are most comfortable in patterns and are very direct in the way that you function. However I feel you guys being frustrated and feeling like everyone else is getting things that you wanted or that they are ahead of you in life, but instead of making an active change in your life you sit and throw yourself a pity party. Then instead of taking the blame and accepting the fact that you aren’t trying to reach your goals you blame the universe, and it’s just a very vicious cycle. I think there’s a small part of you that acknowledges it but not enough to work on the shadow. I think all in all your destiny is to face the change, want the change, and make the change. I feel you want to do all these things, it’s in your soul. Facing a rebirth of the self is always challenging and scary. If you feel like the change will make you lose yourself, maybe that’s exactly what you need? I also want to stress that if you’re not ready for something then it won’t happen, but if the universe decides you are it will be much harder of a rebirth than if you chose it for yourself. I feel that you have lots to think about in terms of how to rebirth yourself. I also feel like you overextend too much for people who don’t care about you in the same way. For this pile I feel like the destined path is to choose to grow out of a place you have been in too long. Such as a friend group, small town, relationship, or family. I believe in you pile 3, change is scary but you have so much time to truly bloom, let yourself have that. Signs: purple; snakes; ribbons; coquette fashion; ocean breeze; violin; pink; smiles; meadows; bunnies; ethereal vibes; angels; church; small town; trailers; dirt roads
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navstuffs · 1 month
Note
hi!! i really love your writing and i would love if you could feed me with a request (only if you're comfortable with it, ofc) 👉🏼👈🏼 what about a leon x reader where reader is passing through a very tough depressive crisis and is really not fine mentally speaking — and leon just try to help and comfort them through this? 👉🏼👈🏼
anyway, thank you for your fics, they really helped me these days 😭💗
Anchor
Pairing: Leon Kennedy x GNPartner!Reader
Summary: It is 1 am when Leon Kennedy knocks on your door. He shouldn't be there and you shouldn't have opened it. 
Warning tags: hurt/comfort, angst, leon almost died, reader is suffering with anxiety due to past events, can be read as platonic or romantic (you choose)
Writer's Notes: hello! first of all, im sorry i took so long to write this request for you. i changed some stuff and i hope you don't mind (reader is still depressed). thank you so much your kind words and i hope this fic serves as comfort for you!! <333 stay safe anon!
for more painful leon's fics, check my masterlist. i have some happy ones too :)
It is 1 am when Leon Kennedy knocks on your door. It is the third time that week only, the fifth of the month. 
It starts when you don’t appear at work after two weeks since his return, and no one knows where you are. HR informs you are sick, which means you are still alive somewhere in the world, just sick. Okay, but sick with what? Sick how? Are you in the hospital? Do you need any help? Leon knows you don’t have family around, like him, and you are pretty much alone - like him. 
So, as any regular worried friend would, he calls and texts. He wants to hear your voice and guarantee that you don’t need help and have everything you need. That you truly are okay. No answer. HR has guaranteed him you are not dead, but what if you—no, he shouldn’t think about that.
The next step is going to your house. He knows where your address is and wouldn’t be a complete weird appearing there in the afternoon. No answer. Leon won’t be a creep as far as looking at your windows, at least not yet. He won’t go as far as busting your door and checking how you are feeling because he needs to confirm you are okay. You might just not be home.
On the second visit, Leon got awfully close to kicking your door. Before he could do that or even knock, he saw a shadow pass over the window. Though Leon told himself he wouldn’t, he looked inside just in time to see you disappear to the second floor. So, at least you are really alive, Leon’s body filling with relief. It could have been a bad case of flu, and you don’t want to contaminate anyone.
One more week passes, and he visits your house two more times. Those times you didn’t even bother to hide yourself, lazily lying down on the sofa in a way Leon couldn’t see your face (oh yeah, now he is definitely peeking out your windows). So you are genuinely ignoring him or truly sick with some contagious disease. Maybe Covid?
The fifth time he knocks on your door, it is 1 am and Leon is deeply not only worried but bitter. He was sitting in his apartment alone, wondering what you had and why you didn’t open the door for him. You two are colleagues, and Leon would dare to go as far as to call you his friend if anyone asked. How many times have you brought him soup while he was sick? Brought him meds, kept him company? Checked on him until he was finally all better?
It would be only fair if he did the same.
Leon grabs his keys without even thinking: You will open the door for him tonight. And if you don’t, well, he will kick it open. To hell with the civil approach.
-x-
All the courage slips away from his body when he notices the kitchen’s light on. Leon can’t see anything inside since you decided to make his life harder and close the curtains. So, instead of kicking that door until it’s down, Leon goes back to the gentle approach (like the idiot he is): he knocks.
The door opens not even ten seconds later, and Leon blinks, surprised. You are there. You, not a trick of his eyes: a fluffy and long blanket covering your body, only your face peeking with a familiar expression Leon recognizes immediately - he had seen in his own mirror before.
“You won. What the fuck do you want?” Those are the first words to him in weeks.
“May I come in?” 
You ponder for a moment, your eyes red, and Leon wonders when you last slept. You walk away, leaving the door open, and Leon follows inside, locking the door behind him. 
Your house isn’t in the best state. He had been here before and thought you weren’t the most organized person (“I can find myself in my own mess, Leon.”). The mess had grown too much from normal. There were tons of take-out boxes on the kitchen counter, pizza boxes, and fast food bags. At least you had been eating—not the best food ever, but feeding. He could work with that.
And the bottles—oh, those Leon would identify anywhere. You weren’t a heavy drinker, and you mentioned plenty of times you didn’t know how he liked whiskey. Now, there were countless empty bottles of whiskey, beer, and vodka, so much so that the place looked like a bunch of frat boys had a party just the night before and didn’t bother to clean.
Leon follows you to the living room as you fall onto the couch. An old Simpsons episode plays on the TV screen. There are still some bags and bottles on the floor, but fewer. Your eyes focus on the TV, not really watching or paying attention to him.  Leon stands there, keeping a safe distance from you and gathering what to say. 
“I came to check on you.” Leon starts, his eyes glued on you. “You haven’t called or texted me back. The HR said-”
“I am sick. I wanted to be left alone.”
“I know, but-”
“I could complain about this to HR, you know? It could be considered an invasion of privacy, and you could lose your job. “
“I was worried about you.”
“You saw me in the window that day, didn’t you? I’m alive and breathing. Now get out.”
You hide your face in the sofa, conversation clearly done on your side. It feels like an impossible battle to win. Leon then tries again, “Do you need anything?” 
“No. Get out.”
He sighs, turning on his heels. Leon wants to say you can call if you need him, any time, but Leon knows you wouldn't. This is an impossible battle to win, Leon realizes as he starts to leave. But then he freezes, a memory piercing his thoughts. Leon comes back to the living room, your face still hidden.
“No.”
“What?” 
“I am not leaving. Not before I know what is wrong.”
“I am sick.”
“Yes. So I have heard.” 
You don’t turn to look at him, and that’s fine. If you want to be stubborn, so could he. Leon can wait. The episode on the TV finally ends, and as the familiar opening plays in the background, you slowly turn in his direction, one eye appearing first, then the other, as if expecting Leon would be gone by now. Unlucky for you, Leon S. Kennedy didn’t give up that easily, especially for his friends.
“I don’t know what you are feeling, but I know that face.” His voice manages to sound neutral.
Of course, he does. Of course, your partner, the legendary D.S.O veteran, would know. You, just a newbie, would have no idea what he went through, but Leon didn’t seem the kind of person to crumble for anything. Leon would probably be fine if you were the one to get shot, not him. He wouldn’t have panicked, he wouldn’t have started crying, screaming for someone to help them, losing themselves in a sea of despair and pain.
“Hey…”
Blood. So much blood in your hands. You are useless, you can’t help him as Leon’s face loses color-
“Hey.”
He deserved someone better—someone much better as a partner—not you, a weak agent who thought you were strong enough to stand by his side. Oh, how wrong you were.
Leon calls your name, more urgent this time, and your line of sight is filled with the face of the man you considered your friend right at your path—concerned blue eyes, his hair tickling against your face. His forehead is in concentration, the faint ghost of a beard, as he speaks soothingly. “Hey, look at me. You are safe. Deep breaths, come on.” 
The visions mix as you blink: Leon losing blood in your arms, unconscious, back to being safe, his worried eyes staring at you.
Your rapid breathing noise fills the room, your heart wanting to burst as the pain spreads over your body, the pain worse than being stabbed or punched. You keep your eyes on Leon - he is fine, he is safe, he is well, he is worried sick about you- as he continues to nod and tell you to breathe.
It takes a while, Leon’s hands on your shoulder as you finally calm down, the tears rolling freely from your eyes.
“I am sorry.” You manage to whisper. “I am so sorry.”
“You are safe. We both are safe.” Leon declares, and you take that in. Right now, yes. But what about tomorrow? What about-? “Hey, eyes open at me.” When had you even closed them? “Come on. There is no one else, just you and me. And we are safe.” 
You nod, not arguing back. Finally, you sit down, and Leon takes two steps back. “Water?” 
“I think there are some in the fridge,” you reply, cleaning your tears. Leon leaves and quickly comes back with two bottles, unbottling them for you. You shake your head, but Leon insists, and you drink in small sips, the cold liquid refreshing your dry throat. When was the last time you had any water? Or took a shower? Or slept?
Finally, you give him space on the couch to sit. Leon doesn’t, and you point your head to your side, and he sits, keeping a safe distance from you. You two say nothing for a while, simply looking at the TV to watch Bart Simpsons on his shenanigans. 
“I am sorry.”
“Would you stop that?” Leon sighs back, frustrated. 
“No. I am sorry.”
“Fine. I forgive you. Are we good now?”
“No.” 
“I knew it wouldn’t be,” Leon replies with a sad smile.
“You could have died, and I didn’t-” Leon says your name, but you continue “-let me finish. I didn’t help. I didn’t move. I did nothing.” 
Leon didn’t want to talk about this, knowing it was inevitable. The day he took a bullet for you: not one, but two. Leon noticed before you, his reflexes quicker than yours. It was his responsibility anyway.
You only watched, shocked, as the bullet pierced his leg, then his chest. You didn’t move or flinch; you just froze, your hands closing and opening nervously as Leon fell right in front of you. You had been fortunate that the backup team had arrived on the other second, finding in the middle of the swarm of bullets a screaming you protecting Leon with his own body, all training thrown out of the window. You two should have been dead. Life had given you and him another chance, since no other vital organ or vein of Leon had been damaged.
You don’t remember much after except asking for your resignation that same day and getting a “No” as an answer. So you decided to get on sick leave until some higher-up got tired and fired you.
“I did nothing.” Leon tries to interrupt you again, but you continue, “You could have died, and I did nothing.”
“It wouldn’t be your fault.” 
“What? Of course, it would!” 
“No, it would not.” 
“Can you fucking stop trying to make me feel better?” Your tone is so angry, so vile, that Leon almost flinches. 
Death is always in the back of his mind. Every time he is out there, he could die. He is expandable; they all are, but he couldn’t just let you die. You a much smarter version of what he once was during Raccoon City. The same bravery, but not foolish as his. Much sharper. Leon knew why he got paired up with you in the first place, the irony not completely lost in him. 
It would have been fine if Leon died that day he protected you, but not okay if you did. Not on his watch. Not now, not ever.
“I can’t help it,” Leon replies, a sad smile on his lips. “I can’t help it, especially when a friend needs my help.” 
A friend? 
Do not grow attachments. Wasn’t that your first lesson? It had been hard to be paired up with a man who hated it at first, then to learn how to laugh at his silly jokes or admire how far Leon would go for anyone. For anyone, except himself, stupid brave man.
You open your mouth and close it, simply lying against the sofa with your eyes closed. 
“So, let me help you?” His voice is warm and inviting. 
It would be best if you said no. You should kick this man out of your living room, out of your life, and never go back to that stupid job fighting an endless battle that would end with you dead or someone you cherished dead. You don’t know how Leon does it, but as you open your eyes, his blue eyes look straight at you awaits in hope. Waiting to comfort you, support you to the best of his abilities, and be your friend.
The pain is still there, vivid in your soul and mind, but there is hope. Right there, in that tiny spot you gave Leon S. Kennedy. That’s why you shouldn’t have opened that damn door, you realize, but it is too late. You limit on nodding.
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desafinado · 1 year
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Hello! I really love your writings, they're lighthearted and interesting to read. I also love your characterization for the characters! Would it also be alright for me to request some fluffy domestic headcanons for Alhaitham or Kamisato Ayato with their s/o as their wife? Thank you and have a nice day! <3 <3 <3
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𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 happily ever afters (?)
°。⋆ alhaitham, ayato x reader (separately)
°。⋆ sickening fluff, nicknames/pet names galore, suggestive (omg)
note: hi hi! thank you so much for your support and feedback !!! as for your request, why not both! hope this satisfies your domestic/fluffy desires !! also… i like framing marriages as happy endings with a question mark, because i think that pretty much encapsulates my perspective on it. you hope it is a happy one and you’ll strive to make it such, but you’re never gonna be certain of it.
(alhaitham, ayato) | (zhongli, diluc, kazuha)
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alhaitham ♡
i’m desperately thinking malewife, and i will bc these are my hcs so damn it.
he didn’t completely quit his job, but if you work as well… expect him to be babying you just the tiniest bit.
he made a promise to take care of you so he very much will.
cooking breakfast/dinner when he notices you coming home a bit more tired.
buying groceries (most importantly, your favorite snacks) while he's out.
leaving little notes around the house whenever he has to leave for work (whether it be a few hours or days).
you can also expect him to rant more nonchalantly, aka welcome the inner sanctum of his thoughts he must repress in front of higher ups in order to be “polite”.
“i mean what kind of buffoonery must you partake in to even have that idea? the mental gymnastics you must do in order to get from point a to point b is-” “dear, breathe and drink this tea for a second.”
in turn, you’re also often the one to keep him in and check and remind him of his own needs (whether it be emotional or purely basic like eating and sleeping).
in relation to this, you’ve implemented cuddle breaks where if you feel he’s going too far and in too deep, you can drag him into a cuddle session for an hour.
he’s usually silent the whole time, but you can see the clear progression from him grumbling about it to melting into your arms.
also they rarely ever last for just an hour and sometimes it might even escalate (suggestive yes) if he's feeling particularly clingy.
lets address the elephant in the room, alhaitham has been touch-starved for most of his life, so you coming in and giving him all the affection (with no question or judgment whatsoever) is the best thing that has happened to him.
his little smile when you hug him from behind or leave a kiss on his forehead.
anyways, back on track, most people don’t even realize you two are married but you both don’t really care either. it's just funny to hear/see their reactions.
“dinner with someone you're calling your beloved? yeah sure, that’ll be interesting” “you can disrespect me, but i will [redacted] if you so much as think about disrespecting them.”
living individual lives doesn’t stop either of you from being particularly clingy though… whether it be you storming into alhaitham’s office demanding for him to just hold you tight or alhaitham skipping work to have you kiss all his stress away.
you’re both pretty upfront about your emotions, because you don’t want to lose anything to miscommunication… (even if sometimes, it might be a bit embarrassing)
at the end of the day, you two are married… and he couldn’t have asked for a better partner to lay himself vulnerable to.
how can you say no when his eyes are practically speaking for his heart; a vision of longing and yearning so crystal clear. you’re running a hand through his hair, and as every second passes he only leans in to your touch. he looks up at you for a second, debating whether or not he interrupt the comfortable silence; he eventually looks back down, but you’re not one to ignore that and brush it off.
“my love, what is the matter?”
another moment passes before he finally gathers the courage to say the words trapped in his throat.
“i know we’ve been over it, but i can’t believe i’m yours… and you’re mine. i’m just thankful, is all. i hope i can always be the one you can rely on, as you are to me.”
a minor blush dusts his cheeks as you giggle softly at his flustered state. it wasn’t unusual, but it certainly made you feel happy, being able to fluster the stoic and pragmatic alhaitham.
“and you are, my love. celestia could send rains of fire and stampedes of thunder, and i would only ever run to you. i’ve entrusted my soul to yours, whether you know it or not, and you’re not getting rid of me so easily.”
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ayato ♡
lord kamisato, this. lord kamisato, that. he does not care, he will take time out of schedule specifically for you and only you.
because no one could compare to the way you call his name, when you wake up first thing in the morning, your voice still groggy, or while you’re both walking in the garden and you spot a beautiful flower.
you specifically request him not to make you any food though, because there's a 20% it will be inedible (the chances are low, but never zero)
instead, he’ll order your favorite pastries and have them delivered every morning in time for breakfast.
once he leaves for work, you both are very reluctant to let go… as if you’re not gonna sneak into his office every hour or so.
having you sat on his lap, arms around your waist while he’s going over documents.
if he has some plans that require him to be out and about, he takes every chance to sneak away and have a secret little moment or two with you.
this only escalates during festivals when his stress levels reach new heights. you steal him away, so you both can actually enjoy the festival the way everyone else is.
hearing him quietly chuckling feels as though you’ve been welcomed into an eternal paradise that only you two know of.
on the rare occasion that you don’t see him the entire day, you change or do things around the house to it feel more like a home for the both of you
ayato’s been complaining about back pain? you spend the day searching for a pillow that fixes that (worse comes to worse, there’ll be a new mattress when he comes home…)
the walls feel a bit bare and drab? you’ll just frame and hang up some of your favorite memories together.
you’ll also often find yourself experimenting with new boba recipes and having him try them all when he comes home; because of this pastime of yours, his favorite milk tea flavor has gone through a variety of changes.
anyways, when he does come home from work, you very much try to leave it outside (unless he truly needs to get things off his chest by venting).
he just wants to spend an evening with you watching a movie, having homemade dinner, or simply cuddling in bed.
the rest of the world fades into obscurity whenever you’re holding him close, face snuggled into his chest.
you’re just whispering compliments and words of comfort, because archons know he doesn’t hear it enough (/srs i feel like he gets used to the courteous praises coming from his colleagues and such for doing a good job, but you telling him how pretty his face is, is simply unmatched)
to hell it be damned, he fought for his marriage to you and he will fight everyday to protect the home you’ve both built together.
“in the kitchen!”
your voice makes itself known as ayato is quick to rush to the kitchen to see what you’re up to. there’s some flour scattered on the counter and floor as well as some unwashed dishes in the sink, and you’re in the middle of it all, giving him an awkward smile.
“i was just trying a new recipe and tried making pearls, i’m sorry about the mess…”
you laugh awkwardly as he only moves faster towards you. the moment he reaches you, he takes both your hands, soft and still covered in flour.
“i’m sure it turned out great. your hard work clearly shows.” he chuckles, bringing a hand up to your face stroking your cheeks. “i think… it’s missing a personal touch though. would you mind?” he closes the gap between you both, his lips barely grazing yours, waiting for your confirmation.
“indeed it does. i’ve missed you… a lot.”
your lips eventually find his and you can’t help the smile that creeps on to your face. its moments like these that you cherish and keep in your heart; these memories of him that belong to you forever more.
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requests are open!! please do not repost on other sites.
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u10como · 2 months
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Some time ago, i released this picture on my DA with a caption, later suppplemented by a short story expanding on the theme, followed by personal afterword regarding my background and themes of the story, which i now decided to present here on tumblr, all joined into one text. Once again, english isn't my first language, it was one of the first longer pieces i wrote and i'm by no means a writer, but i hope some of you might enjoy it nonetheless.
Hope you don't mind
You met her on an online forum about your favourite band and you've been messaging for a month now. She was just perfect: Funny, smart and as far as you were aware she was really interested in you, but everytime you suggested meeting somewhere, she said she's either busy or just changed the subject. Not wanting to push her, you gave her some time to think about it.
One morning a message from her, accompanied by a photo landed in your inbox:
"So...this isn't easy for me, but you seem like genuinely good person and i'd hate myself if i passed that opportunity  because i was insecure. Anyway, this is me. I had an accident with high voltage  power lines six months ago and i'm still insecure about meeting new people or going in public in general.
If you feel weird about it i completely understand and won't bother you any more, but if you still want to meet, i know a nice little pizzeria just around corner from where i live. The owner is an old family friend and could arrange a small room in the back for us so people won't stare."
Why should i mind?
As you read the message over and over, your mind is racing, filled with mixed emotions. On one hand, you're relieved – she really wants to meet you after all. On the other hand you can't help but feel sad – such a beautiful, smart girl, full of life, suffering from such horrible injury. Of course, you never for a second consider saying no to her proposition – she is still the great girl you messaged with the past month. You immediately write your reply:
„Hey! Of course i still want to meet you - i've been asking to meet you for some time now and nothing changed about that! Today, 4 in the afternoon works for you? Just tell me where the pizzeria is and i'll wait for you there.“
In few minutes she replied:
„Oh, you can't believe how relieved i am – thank you for not being weird about it! Yes, 4 will be perfect time. The pizzeria is Giovanni's on the corner of Oak and Harbor st – just tell the owner you're Jana's friend, he'll seat you in the back.“
„Well… I have a date!“ you think to yourself. Rummaging through your wardrobe you struggle to find anything you'll be satisfied with – going all dressed up like to prom seems like overkill, but you don't want to come all casual either – after all, you really care for her and you want to show it. In the end you settle for your least worn cargo pants with a T-shirt of your favorite band – you know she likes them too, so you hope this might outweigh your otherwise way too casual look. You set off early, intending to buy flowers for her. After careful consideration, you buy a nice bouquet of seven pink carnations and set off to Giovanni's.
As you step inside ten minutes before 4, the owner – a rather short, somewhat overweight yet muscular man with large hands and a bushy mustache above his friendly smile greets you. „Welcome to Giovanni's, what can i do for you?“ „Uhm, hello, i am Friend of Jana…“ „Oh, Wonderful, wonderful!“ the owner interrupts you with a big warm smile, A friend of our little Jana is my friend too! Right this way, have a seat, i'll bring you a vase for these beautiful flowers. Care for a drink in the mean time?“ „Yes, i saw you serve a homemade lemonade, please.“ you answer. „A wonderful choice! Comming right up!“ says the owner with a wide smile.
With that, the owner runs back front, returning in half a minute with your lemonade served in beautiful tall glass with pieces of lemon, lime and mint leaves, toped with a bright red straw. „Here you go! When Jana arrives i'll send her right away. Now, if i may ask, when did you two met? Pardon me for asking what might be a personal question, but you see, being friends with her parents ever since i moved here, Jana is like niece to me.“ "Oh, don't apologise, i understand.“, you reply, “To be frank, we haven't met in person yet, we were just chatting over internet and i really liked her – and the feeling was mutual, dare i presume.“ „I see“, says the owner, „So you know about…?“, He struggles to put his thoughts to words, instead just shrugs his shoulders one by one.
„Oh? Oh! Yes, i do. In fact, she told me just this morning.“ „I was just asking.“, nods the owner, „You see, our poor little Jana suffered enough. I just don't want her to leave today with a broken heart, so i wanted to make sure you won't freak out or something.“ „Oh no, don't worry, sir. I was asking her for a meetup for two weeks before i knew about it. I liked her before i knew about it and i don't see why it should change anything.“ The owner nods his head „I see. You're good in my books then, kid. I'm glad Jana found someone so understanding.“ He pats your shoulder as he says that.
There is a ring from the little bell above entrance and a young woman's voice calls:
„Uncle Tigran, are you there?“ „That's her.“ Says the owner and rushes off to the front. „My little Jana, it's so nice to see you again! Your friend is in the back, go, have some fun, and when you're ready, call me and i'll be right back to take your order.“
You stand up to greet her. In few seconds, she peeks inside the room with a shy, almost affraid look on her face. As your eyes meet, she smiles at you and you smile back. Despite the smile, her green eyes show a hint of timid apprehension. As she steps in, you notice her motionless hands, convincing at first glance, but knowing her condition, obviously artificial.
"Hi, nice to finally meet you", you say, holding the bouquet of carnations forward. "Oh, these are beautiful, thank you, she says, leaning in to smell them. Looking into her beautiful green eyes, your heart flutters with happiness.
„I'm really so glad to finally meet you in person“ you say. „You're even more beautiful than on the photo .“
„Oh, thank you. Nobody said such thing to me since…“ she pauses, looking into distance. After few seconds she breaks off, shyly attempting to smile on you. „Anyway, would you mind helping me with my coat?“ „Of course, right away“, you say as you move in to unbutton it. As you remove her coat, the prosthetic arms slip off her shoulders, staying firmly inside the coat's sleeves, letting her little arm stumps show. „Oh, sorry, i didn't mean to, let me…“ you stammer an apology.
„No, that's allright. They were meant to come off. I should have told you. I wear them on the street to avoid the stares, but they are so uncomfortable, so since here i am among people who know about me, i just hooked them to the coat so i don't have to wear them all the time.“
As you sit on the opposite sides of the table, you suddenly don't know what to say. You see she is uncomfortable, so you try to steer the conversation a different way.
„So… This pizzeria – It's named Giovanni's, but i heard you call the owner a different name?“
„Oh yes, uncle Tigran gave this establishment italian sounding name as marketing trick. He is great, though, one of the best pizza chefs around. He says he spent five years in Naples learning about local cuisine, actually. I understand you already talked with him?“
„Oh yes, he seems like really nice, but no-nonsense kind of guy. Told me you're like a niece to him and warned me not to break your heart. Not that i intended to, anyway.“, you add with a smile.
„Yeah, uncle Tigran was always nice to me. He visited me in the hospital almost daily when i…“ once again, Jana's gaze slides into distance.
„You don't have to talk about it, i'm sorry if i reminded you in any way.“ You say hastily.
„Oh? No, don't apologize, you did nothing wrong, it's just… Everything reminds me, you know? Wherever i go, whatever i do, every single thing reminds me i no longer…“ she pauses and sighs, lifting her stumps to illustrate her point before continuing „…have arms. Waking up in the morning, i try to lift my blanket and these useless things just flap about helplessly. Reaching for things, trying to do any simple task, even steadying myself when i trip – everything i do i must remind myself i can't do it the normal way anymore. If it was just one i could deal with it, but like this? I feel so helpless sometimes. The first few weeks in the hospital i had to bother the nurses everytime my nose got itchy, not to mention i had to be showered by them, just standing there, leting them clean me off. Tt felt so dehumanising... I'm sorry i spilled all this on you, it's my problem and i should deal with it myself, you don't have to think about it.“ She averts her eyes, looking down into the table.
„Jana,“, you say, „If i wanted not to think about it i wouldn't be here with you – and that would make me quite a bad person, don't you think? I came because i liked you from the moment we started chatting, long before i ever saw you. If there is anything i can do to help you – even if it would be just to stand by your side to always be able to remind you how great person you are whenever should you doubt yourself – i want to be there and help you.“
With tears welling in her eyes, Jana lifts her head „Really? You would do that for me?“
„Of course i would. You are smart, funny and stunningly beautiful. If i can help it, i wish for you never to be sad again“, you reach over the table with a tissue to wipe the tears from her cheeks.
„Thank you,“ she says, suppressing tears, visibly moved. „I never thought i would hear anybody say that to me. Come on - let's order some food, i'm starving.“
As if waiting for his cue, the owner comes in with a big smile „So, what would you want, my dears? We have excellent Margherita Napoletana, but if you're not into traditional pizza, i might do a regular New York style. Most people prefer that, anyway – beats me why, though, there's nothing better than proper traditional italian pie.“
„I think i could go for your Napoletana, Jana told me you're one of the best pizza chefs around, mister… uhh…“ „Tigran Manukyan, at your service.“, he replies with maybe a little too deep bow, „I presume our little Jana here told you about my little trick already, so why should i hide it anymore? Anyway, what can i offer you, my darling?“ says mister Manukyan turning to Jana. „I'll take the Napoletana too, uncle Tigran. And might i ask you for a glass of that lemonade too? It looks so refreshing.“ „Comming right up, my dears“, says mister Manukyan and rushes off.
„So… Where were we?“ asks Jana. „Well,“ you say, „I just told you you're beautiful and i wish to be always there for you.“
„Oh…“ she pauses, but smiles, finally seeming to be at ease, „I mean… Thank you. I'm sorry, I've became quite bad at taking compliments lately – not that i ever was any good to begin with, but now… i mean, you know, with my…“ she says, wiggling her arm stumps.
„You don't have to explain yourself, i understand“, you calm her, „Jusk know you are beautiful to me and nothing can ever change that. In fact, you were beautiful to me long before i knew how you even look, when we were still just chatting.“
Mister Manukyan comes with Jana's glass of lemonade and a pitcher „I brought you two some more for refills – on the house of course. The pizzas will be done in few minutes.“ Almost unisono, you and Jana reply „Thank you, mister Manukyan /Thank you, uncle Tigran“ and with a smile, he leaves.
„Anyway,“ says Jana, „I know you're telling me that just to make me feel better. Why would somebody as cute as you consider someone ‚beautiful‘ just from an online chat?“ she says, leaning forward for the straw and taking a sip from her drink.
„Maybe because i found a great person to talk to and spend time with.“ You reply, looking directly into Jana's eyes. „Maybe i don't care about looks that much. Maybe i think beauty is not only based on somebody's looks. And maybe, or not as much maybe as quite undeniably surely, you are actually beautiful even if i would step so low as to judge you just by your looks. You have pretty face, beautiful hair and the most captivating emerald eyes i've ever seen. But even without that, you are above all the brave, smart girl i came to know and love – and nothing can change that.“
„Brave? How am i brave? I spent half a year hiding from world, almost never leaving my room unless i had to.“ Replied Jana.
„Yet you came here and invited me.“, you say, “You overcame your anxiety and reached out. That alone was braver than most people would ever hope to be. All i ask of you is to believe in yourself as i believe in you. You are the bravest girl in know and i love you for that.“
„I love you too“, she says, hint of tears in her eyes once again as she shifts closer to you with her arm stumps outstretched. Understanding the hint, you hug her, gently stroking her hair with your hand.
„Oh, young love, what a beautiful sight!“ says mister Manukyan as he comes in with your pizzas in each hand „Here is your food, my dears, Bari Akhorzhak to you both!“
„Uncle Tigran,“ says Jana, lifting her head from your shoulders, „this was the first time ever i heard you speaking Armenian in your pizzeria.“
„Well, i figured i might as well drop the act, my dear.“ said mister Manukyan with a smile. „Pizza is my passion and my living, but i'm no Italian and never will be. Maybe it's time for me to fly my true colors with pride. People come here for good food, not for fake Italian. Of course, a name change would be required, then, but i hope people would come nonetheless. After all ‚Uncle Tigran's‘ has a nice ring to it, no? And i might as well put some of my old family recipes on the menu. Next time you come, i'll make you the best Lahmajoun you ever had, i promise!“
„That would be really great, mister Manukyan“, you say with enthusiasm, „I'm looking forward to it.“
As mister Manukyan leaves with a big, warm smile, you and Jana sit to your pizzas. "Do you need any help?" you ask. "No." says Jana almost too quickly. "Well yes, probably, but i shouldn't. I need to do this on my own - i mean, there won't always be somebody around to help me, but i will be always armless, you know?" You notice her suddenly easing up, as if adressing her condition out loud, without euphemisms or hesitating helped her finally come to terms with it. "Would you mind helping me taking off my shoes, though?"
"Of course", you say as you kneel and gently lift her right foot in your hand, taking off her shoe and sock, then doing the same with her left foot. "Thank you. You're a real sweetheart" she says, lifting her feet up to the tabletop, awkwardly picking the fork with her left foot and knife with the right. As you sit on the opposite side of table, you can't take your eyes off her while she cuts a small piece of her pizza and using the fork in her left food brings it to her mouth with a great effort.
"Oooh!" she smiles with pleasure as she savors the food in her mouth, "I almost forgot how great uncle Tigran's pizzas are! You should eat too while it's hot." Taking a bite from your own pizza, you must agree - this is certainly the best pizza you ever had. As you both eat, you notice Jana's movements becoming ever so slightly more fluent and relaxed with each bite. you can't help but stop and look at her, smiling.
"What? Is something on my face?" she asks as she starts rubbing her nose with her right stump. "No, it's just... When you came you were all tense and apprehensive, but now you seem to ease up." "I just know i'm in a good company", she says, shrugging her shoulders, "I mean, yeah, i knew you are funny and kind from the first time we started chatting, but now, you made me feel... appreciated, normal. Like i matter. I... probably just needed to hear that, you know? Like... from somebody outside of my family." "I see," you say, "But how come you weren't so shy when we were chatting on the forum?"
"I don't know, i guess the anonymity played a part, you know?" she ponders, "Like - on the internet, nobody sees me. Nobody knows. There's no way to tell whether the person on the other side is beautiful, ugly, thin, fat or uses toes to write. That probably helped me there."
"Tell me about it," you say. "Sometimes i feel anxious even making a phonecall, let alone talking to strange people in person!" "You?" she smiles "No way! You seem so cool and confident. After all, you asked me out first, i would have never had the guts to do it myself without you."
"The same magic of the anonymous internet as in your case" you reply, "And if i somehow seem confident now, it's only because i feel like we known each other for ages. It's hard to describe, but i feel like we were meant to be together, you know?"
setting down the knife, she extends her right foor over the table towards you, gently stroking your face with her big toe. Smiling, you take her foot in your hands, planting a soft kiss on her ankle. She giggles "That tickles! But... it feels nice." Kising her foot once again, you let go of it, looking deep into her green eyes with a warm smile. "So, are you up for a little stroll after we finish our pizzas?", you ask her. "Gladly!", she replies as she puts another piece i her mouth. "Do you have any specific place in mind?" "Well," you say, "I was thinking of just going for a walk, but if you want, we might go to the gazebo on the cliff above the city and watch the sunset together?" "Oh, romantic!" she exclaims with excitement. "I like that."
When you finish your pizzas, mister Manukyan comes in to clean up, almost as if he was waiting for his cue. "Enjoyed your food, my dears?" he asks, "Everything was up to your liking? "Of yourse, uncle Tigran," responds Jana with a smile, "I always loved your cooking."
As you leave Jana in the back to pay for the food, mister Manukyan says:
"Thank you for everything, kid. Jana really needed someone to just be there for her. She used to visit me every week, but since her accident she just moved back to her parent's house and stoped going out. I knew what she was going through, but i had no idea how to help. Turns out, all she really needed was for someone outside of her family to just treat her with love and respect and you did just that. I won't lie to you - i doubt if stuff would be just *poof* and everything is okay now, people just don't work like that and i am sure there is still a lot ahead of Jana before she's back to the cheerful self i remember from before her accident, but i feel like you really helped her make a big progress today. Once again, thank you for that."
"It was my pleasure, mister Manukyan." you replied, "She is great girl and i fell for her ever since we started chatting." "I'm glad to hear that. And please, you can call me Tigran", he says with a smile, "Or Uncle Tigran, whole town will know me like that anyway soon, at least i hope."
After shaking hands with mister Manukyan, you return to Jana, who is almost prepared to leave. As you help her tie her shoes loose enough so she can slip them on and off at will, you go fetch her coat.
"No, you can leave that here,", she says, "i'll talk with uncle Tigran and ask him to hide it somewhere so i can pick it up later."
"Are you sure? Your arms are in there, don't you want to put them on?"
"Not really. As i said, they are heavy and uncomfortable. Also, they are purely cosmetic, so aside from keeping people from staring, they are pretty much useless.", she said. "And if that means people will stare, then so be it. I need to get used to showing in public and i thought why not now, when i have you by my side?" "As you wish," you reply. "Shall we go, then?"
"Okay. I hope you don't mind being seen in public with a disabled girl"
"Being seen with beautiful smart girl i love? Why shuld i mind?"
A little afterword is due.
This story, while obviously coming from place of my attraction to women with, let's say, non-standard physique, in this particular case bilateral arm amputees, is a departure from my usual style. My usual character background snippets revolve around happier circumstances - my characters usualy lose their limbs voluntarily, non-permanently or in some obscure magic way, which, while it can't be assured to be temporary, has the peculiar side effect of making them weirdly okay with the changes.
This is not the case. In reality, a limb loss is a powerful traumatic experience to vast majority of people. Overcoming such trauma might take weeks, months, years even, and some people may never recover mentally. I felt like this point was worth mentioning and keeping in mind.
As for overall themes of this story, the main themes are hope, acceptance and dealing with adversity. In that sense, Jana's condition is a stand-in for number of problems which might cause a person to lose their sense of self-worth and shut themselves off from the world. If you are suffering from any condition causing you to feel that way, remember this: You Matter. You are loved. And while in real life, recovery will certainly not come as quickly as for Jana in my story, the point illustrated still stands: Some battles are not meant to be fought alone. Sometimes all you need is to find someone who will help you carrying your burden. Remember, that leaning on your friends in hard times isn't weakness. On the contrary, knowing when to ask for help is major strength. And if you do not suffer from any such problems, then please, be mindful of those who do. Be kind, accepting and unconditionally loving as our unnamed protagonist. After all, the protagonist is reffered as You, because they are supposed to represent the best in every single one of us. Man, woman, trans or non-binary, if you're reading this, i hope you will always be as unconditionally accepting as the protagonist is to Jana.
Some elements of the setting sort of come from my own experience. The overall setting of my stories is this usual culturally neutral americano-european mishmash, made for easier accesibility for wider audience, but certain characters or places might carry something from my personal experience. As some of you might know, i am Czech, so i decided to write Jana as one too - even though this might not be really apparent from anything beside her name, that is her intended nationality. Whether you imagine her as local, thinking of this story's setting as somewhere in Czechia or as immigrant to a foreign country of your choice is up to you. Also, the character of Tigran Manukyan is losely based on my own experience: Where i'm from, a lot of pizzerias are actually owned by people from Armenia, Georgia or Turkey and a lot of their owners are very similar to "uncle Tigran" both in their appearance and in their cheerful, friendly way of greeting their customers. Uncle Tigran's character arc is also about acceptance: Accepting own cultural heritage, because every culture is worth preserving.
So, this is the end of my little PSA. Respect each other, be tolerant to one another and try to help those whose life dealt them the worse hand.
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iknowyuu · 1 year
Note
hello! i love ur sieun fics, i was hoping you could write something abt how sieun isn’t used to physical affection but he loves it coming from the reader and he’s trying to be better abt initiating physical touch first. thank you! 
focus
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kdrama! sieun x reader
// read req!
tags: sieun longing for reader when they're right there, established relationship
note: this is just fluff LMFAO. i barely edited this sorry for any mistakes... hope u enjoy <3
you're out of sieun's comfort zone.
obviously, he isn't someone who received much, or any affection past the age of six, and he's grown to keep his hands (and words) to himself.
you'd both been talking for almost a year, and you grew feelings for him after only a few months. he understood you, and never pressured you into anything. he gave you great advice and would encourage you when you felt you weren't at your best. he's seen you at your worst and he barely batted an eye, opting to help you take your mind off things by walking you through what he was studying, helping you calm down in the process. after realizing that, certain things.. changed.
what was supposed to be a quick and friendly high-five was just that; but your hand would linger just for a second more than you used to. playfully swinging your arm around his shoulder as the two of you were walking turned into you using that gesture as a reason to pull him closer, your hold gradually lowering down, down to his waist. even simply standing next to each other turned into a game of "will they, won't they?" as you stood uncomfortably close for friends, but too far away for lovers. little touches would linger for too long, and the atmosphere between you two slowly changed.
that being said, it wasn't a shock to his system when you asked him out. you knew he wouldn't make the first move, so you did. he agreed, of course!
right now, the two of you were walking back to your home, hands dangling dangerously close to each other. even though you've been dating for a while now, you barely knew whether or not he was comfortable with it. he hadn't explicitly told you he wanted you to hold his hand, and you didn't want to push any boundaries.
you both walked while engaging in conversation (one more than the other), and your hands continuously bumped into each other, and every time you restrained the urge to tightly hold his palm in yours, feeling the warmth of his soft hand.
you finally reached your house and let him in, shutting the door behind you. slipping off your shoes and in your slippers, sieun followed suit, following you all the way to the dining table. the two of you brought out your materials in preparation for a study session, comfortable silence following suit. well, in the outside world. in sieun's head, however, that was not the case.
he doesn't know how to tell you, and he wishes he could everytime he sees your face: he wanted to hug you without feeling awkward, he wanted to compliment you when he felt like it, and he wanted you to be able to hold his cheeks without you sensing his unfamiliarity with the gesture and pulling away in fear of making him uncomfortable. he wanted you to touch him however you wanted, but he didn’t know how to express it to you. he felt very conflicted in the sense.
"sieun? could you help me with.. this?" your voice trailed off as you looked to your left to find him staring at his paper, not making a move to pick up his pen. "are you okay?"
he nodded and leaned over slightly, explaining how to work through the problem. you thanked him and started working again, occasionally glancing over at his blank page. he wondered, would you mind if he told you he wanted to hold your hand? would you be annoyed with him if he asked you to hold him, maybe scoot your chair a little closer so his heart could be closer to yours? he knew you wouldn't, but he was still hesitant to ask you anyway. his brain was buzzing with so many thoughts that he couldn't even comprehend nor focus on what was in front of him.
an hour went by and he barely made any progress, which was incredibly unusual for him. you asked him twice more if he was okay and he responded with "yes," everytime, but it didn't cure the worry brewing in your stomach. "let's take a break," you stood up and stretched, noticing how he didn’t move an inch. “um.. are you sure you’re okay, sieun?” as you spoke, the feelings he’d been bottling up finally exploded. “you’ve been acting weird since we got here.. are you uncom-“
"can we hold hands?" he asked quietly. you looked at him in shock, and even he was surprised at the words that left his mouth. your surprise didn't last long though, soon a smile crept onto your lips as you looked at him, heart beating, mood elated. "yeah," you tried to not make a big deal out of it, but you couldn't stop the butterflies that swarmed in your tummy. he stood up and looked down, lacing his fingers with yours, and he finally felt satisfied. "you don't have to ask.. you can hold my hand whenever you feel like it, okay?" you said, looking at him with a flustered smile before tugging his hand, "let's gets some snacks!"
even though it was a struggle with only one hand, it was worth it if the other was taken by you.
taglist: @brxght-world @karyuliee @kkaesslovr @qtaisuu , send an ask to be added!
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feluka · 1 month
Note
Hi, I don’t rlly know how to explain this but I’ll try haha.
I recently found out I have Egyptian and specifically Coptic ancestry, through family tree making, matching with cousins, gedmatch, dna testing, etc and now personal confirmation from family/ancestors.
The problem is idrk who was the Coptic ones in my family as my dad died when I was four and I’ve had no contact with his family at all since. I know it came from his mother, but I can’t even give you her name let alone where she was from, or anything. Although I want to learn more and reconnect and eventually find out who they were exactly. It’s just hard because my dad’s living family has no contact w us and since he’s dead, it’s been hard to get records as well.
I would like to learn more about Coptic culture and Egypt in general but I am worried about people considering me a ‘culture thief’ since I only recently. found this out a few months ago but didn’t really have 100% confirmation until like 2 weeks ago. And even though I can prove genetically I have ancestry Coptic I can’t really say who my ancestors were which would probably make some skeptical.
Especially because I am African American and there already exists a rift between Egyptians and AAs bc of hoteps who claim Egyptian culture/claim Egyptians are just Arabs who ‘stole’ Egyptian culture. I want to be respectful but I’m unsure how to navigate this.
I guess I’m asking if you have any idea how I should move forward, or if you know of any resources to learn more? I want to be respectful, but I would also love to start to reconnect even if I don’t know where my ancestors were exactly from other than ‘Egypt’.
Hello! First of all, this is both a very respectful and a very personal ask, so I want to thank you for trusting me with that. I hope my answer can help you find peace with the matter a little.
Instead of trying to figure out if the overall sentiment of trying to reconnect is harmful or not, because there's really no answer to that in and of itself, and instead stop at every individual action taken to reconnect and asking: could this be harming anybody?
For example, if you'd like to pick up Coptic language lessons, could this action possibly be harmful to anyone? Not really. Is reading about Coptic culture and engaging with what survived of it in modern day harmful? I don't think so.
The only possible thing that I can think of that might be harmful is, I have awful experiences with certain diaspora Copts who have never really engaged with the community nor know much of it, who suddenly butt in conversations about Coptic politics in Egypt like they're an expert on it despite never having been or known anything about it themselves, but from the way you've written this ask I doubt you're the kind of person to do that anyway, seeing as you're being very respectful and that you recognize that there's some dissonance in your experience (which there's no shame in, but the self awareness is helpful as a guide of when to participate and when not to!)
I don't know if I said this before on this blog but, to my knowledge, the matter of the hotep subculture entails far more than just questioning the Egyptian identity, and seeing as I'm neither African American nor Black at all, I don't think it's my place to comment on it. I invite any of my Black followers to contribue to intra-community discussion in the reblogs/comments for you to read, though!
All I can promise you is that even if the notion that the population of Egypt was displaced rather than converted during the Arab conquest of Egypt is false, there still are Black Egyptians and there always have been. Sadly I'm sure there will always be people who try to make you feel like a pretender, but that is true of so many things and regardless of what you do, so always remember thay Black people have always been part of Egypt's history, and that nobody is entitled to know your personal details or family history and you don't need to disclose anything you're not comfortable with to prove anything to them.
As for resources, there's always a lot on Egyptology in general, so the specific topics that would be helpful to be aware of are: modern history of Copts (or Copts post the Arab Conquest of Egypt), the persecution of Copts, the decline of the Coptic language and the efforts to revive the language. The last two are especially pertinent nowadays.
Lastly you can always ask other Copts! I may not have all the answers but I'm sure between me and my followers we can find something helpful for you if you're trying to find a specific resource of have more questions. (The scarcity of resources is something we *all* have to deal with, even us here in Egypt, I'm afraid, but it's not a lost cause! You'd be surprised how much is out there on internet archives.)
I hope you have a lovely day. ♥️
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impactedfates · 9 months
Note
Hello. I was wondering if you could you write a platonic angst story where the reader is Blade's child. I was thinking that because Blade barely spends any time with the reader unless it's during one of their extremely harsh training sessions the reader decides to run away especially after one particularly rough training session where the reader was injured after they accidentally talked back and that night the reader starts packing their stuff but they accidentally left behind their late mother's pendant and Blade found it the next morning. (I hope you're okay with writing this and I wish you a good morning, afternoon or good night ☺️)
A/N: Hihi!! Dw I'm okay with writing this, thanks for the request! I hope you're having a good morning/afternoon/night as well :) This is not how I personally interpreted Blade, however to fit in with this request, I tried my best to match it up based on said request. I hope this oneshot is too your liking, I tried my best to follow the prompt of your thing. Tbh I don't like what I've written much but I hope you can enjoy it anyways.
W.C: 1389
Warnings: Blade is a bad dad, small mentions of death (Readers Mom and some mara struck soldiers), small mentions of blood, angst ending (I think?), most definitely an ooc Blade honestly...,semi-proof read as always.
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((Reader is a teen in this))
Blade's sword slashed through the mara struck beings. His eyes cautiously looking everywhere to ensure he wouldn’t get surprised attacked. Soon the surrounding mara struck enemies where no more. He was able to go back home and see his love.
He called out her name, expecting a reply back. But all that filled his ears was eerily silence…he didn’t walk too far away from her did he?
He paused a bit and called out again, still no response, he was quick to turn and speed walked in the direction he saw her last. Eyes slightly widening as he spotted who he was looking for on the ground, bleeding out. The mara struck soldier who was responsible, right beside them about to deal a final blow, Blade quickly moved and slashed it, it disappeared into dust. But he had no time to celebrate his victory as he quickly crouched down and lifted up his love.
All she could do was weakly turn to him.
“I managed to kill it the first time…b-but their revival state was much stronger than I first thought…how stupid am I huh?”
She spoke, her hands quickly lifted to her mouth as she coughed, blood coming out. Blade was beyond concerned.
“I’ll…I’ll get you to a healer…just hang on tight”
He had softly said, standing up slowly, trying his best to make his way to a nearby healer he could threaten to heal her or just go back to the Stellaron Hunters Base to get her treated.
“Bladie…there’s no need…I-I don’t think I’d make it anyways…”
“Don’t say that, I just have to be quick”
He answered her quickly, shaking his head before cursing under his breath about the whereabouts of Kafka.
“Bladie…me and you both know I won’t make it…so…can you make a promise to me?”
“Sweetheart, you aren’t going too…I won’t let it happen”
Blade's voice rang out once more, but he knew she was right but he just won’t accept it. He can’t.
“Promise me you’ll take care of our kid…make them have a happy life…even if it is in this awful world…even if I’m not there…make sure they’re able to protect themselves as well so they won’t suffer the same fate as me…promise me?”
“S-stop…y-you aren’t g-going too…” 
“Promise me”
Blade stood still from where he was, halting his actions. He stared at her for a bit before looking away. “I promise…”
.
.
.
“Dad p-please can we rest…f-for just a minute”
Your voice ran out tiredly in the training room, your hands on your knees as you attempted to catch your breath. Your eyes glance up to your father, Blade. His sword was still in hand as he looked at you. Showing no emotion like always. He slowly made his way to you, out of instinct you moved back, until your back hit a wall.
“How do you think you’ll be able to protect yourself if you cannot withstand this training?”
He spoke, his eyes narrowing a bit at your form, as he folded his arms. Your breathing slowed a bit as you looked to the ground.
“T-these training sessions…are getting too hard for me…c-can’t we for once just…go out to eat or s-something” “What do you mean by that?”
You took a deep breath in, lifting your head up, eyes meeting his.
“W-we used to go out a lot w-when mom was still here”
You start, not failing to notice the way he tightened his grip on his sword by the very mention of your mother.
“M-mom…s-she would’ve liked if I was resting…I-I don’t think she’d like it if you or I were overworking ourselves with training”
“Your mothers gone”
Blade speaks, inching forward, his arms to his side as his eyes glare at you. You knew that bringing your mother up would strike a nerve in Blade, you knew how much he loved her. But you felt like this was the only way he’d listen.
“Yes, I know b-but…she would’ve wanted us to be happy, to n-not always train too-”
“She’s gone.”
Your father repeated, his grip on the sword increasing with each word that passed through your lips. You shut your mouth for a second, breathing in. Trying to calm yourself and giving your father some time to calm himself as well. Soon your father spoke up again.
“I lost your mother…I’m not losing you just because you couldn’t protect yourself”
“You’re not even there for me anyways, why do you care!?”
“Because I promised your mother!”
“Well you’re not doing a very good job at keeping that promise are you!”
.
.
.
It was quick, maybe you went out of line with what you said, maybe you didn’t. But the next thing you knew was Blade's sword stabbed on the wall next to your head, but also the feeling of blood trickling down your cheek. Your hand had lifted slowly to check the cut, it wasn’t deep, but it wasn’t small either.
Blades heaving breathing filled the room, his eyes looking at the floor before slowly to your face. He slowly moved back a bit upon seeing the cut on your cheek. He hadn’t meant too…he just…snapped. He only intended to stab his sword on the wall, not to hurt you in any way but he failed anyway. He quickly moved away from you and looked to the side before speaking up in a quiet voice.
“…I’m-”
“I’m going to my room”
And now here you were, packing your bags. You had already patched up your wound, but you didn’t want to stay for any longer.
You double, triple checked you had everything before waiting until the dead of night to sneak out. You didn’t know where you’d be going but…anywhere away from your so-called father right?
And despite all your checking, you seemed to have missed the gift your mother wanted to give you before she died.
.
.
.
Blade couldn’t sleep, he lay in bed breathing slowly thinking about what happened…he was so concentrated on fulfilling the promise to ensure you could protect yourself that he forgot he also promised to make you happy. He knew he’d have a long way to go if he wanted to do that but…he’ll start.
The next morning comes along, and although Blade didn’t get as much sleep as he probably should’ve. He was thinking of ways to try and get your forgiveness.
Slowly he got off his bed and made his way to your room, he’ll check on you first. Hopefully you’ll be okay with listening to him.
He knocked once, twice, three times on the door. No response, the only thing was silence. He tried again.
And again.
And…again…
Each round of knocking grew louder and desperate as time went on. The same aching feeling he had in his heart when he realised his old love wasn’t responding…now it was his kid that wasn’t.
But they were just mad at him right?...That’s gotta be it.
“...I’m coming in”
He spoke, slowly opening the door to an empty room, he opened the door wider and looked around. Where were you? You’re hiding right? You gotta be hiding. He looked around.
“...[Name]...come out…this isn’t funny”
He spoke, looking around the room, hoping you’d jump out at him.
“If this is payback for what…happened…then I deserve it, but please come out”
He tried again. His eyes looked everywhere in the room, until it caught on something shining in the sunlight. He walked over, it was your mothers late pendant. His hand slowly reached for it, his thumb slowly running over the gem in the middle. He paused for a bit before clutching onto it. Making his way out of the room in silence.
Perhaps he was dumb to think you’d stick around after what happened and how he treated you. How he’d only really converse or hang out with you if it was training.
But he had hoped he would be able to fix it before you grew resentful of him…perhaps he was dumb on that part too. Somehow seeing the pendant in the empty room made him realise that not only did he lose his love, but also you. It made him finally accept that you ran away from home...from him.
And not only that, he couldn’t fulfil a part of the promise he made.
To make you have a happy life.
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My friend who I asked to read through it said it was giving Endeavour vibes and I have no idea how to feel about that...maybe that's part of the reason why I don't like this fic...
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emeritusemeritus · 3 months
Note
hello !! 🌷 i read spellbound and im IN LOVE with the way you write, so could i request a weasley twins x reader as well? if you don't want to write both twins in love with reader, then just fred </3
so the reader is a hufflepuff student who has been close friends with the twins since the first year at hogwarts, to the point of molly inviting her to stay for a few days sometimes. and the twins (or just fred) like reader so much as a best friend— until reader becomes more than that.
something "but you belong to me." with them. like, reader getting asked out and people confessing to her, but the twins are possessive of her; mysteriously, people who confess to reader inevitably get a wave of bad luck (because of the twins' pranks).
a more possessive side of them, you know? house of balloons has been on my mind these days 2!€+2(3 🤕
thank you so much ! i hope you have a lovely day.
Hi lovely, hope you are well!Thank you so much! I hope this is okay for you?!🖤
Warnings: minor sexual references, pranks, mild swearing. Possessive behaviour, slightly dominant twins. Love confessions.
Word count: 2.2k
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You're in my world now, you can stay, you can stay
But you belong to me, ooh, you belong to me
Being best friends with both Weasley Twins had many pros and cons, of which you'd considered frequently over the years.
They were funny, charming and kind, kept you on your toes, you never went more than an hour without belly laughing. Your life was abundantly better because they were in it.
On the other hand, you got way more detentions, had to attend quidditch matches that weren't your own house and even if they were you were cheering for the wrong team because you were a Hufflepuff and they were Gryffindor beaters. Their family was far from rich, not that it ever bothered you in the slightest, but from another more shallow persons perspective you could see how that would be a factor.
Most importantly, they seemed to scare all the boys away you ever dared approach you. Like guard dogs they seemed to deter any boy away from you and in turn there was not a single boy good enough for you that you'd even shown interest in as Fred and George were always quick to point out their faults, making your crush disappear soon after.
It wasn't always like that but around your fifth year you seemed to take notice of the rather starling pattern of events that repeatedly kept happening. A boy would show interest in you, flirty looks that lingered and secret stolen smiles, maybe they'd even approach you and ask you to Hogsmeade, but most of them didn't get that far. You'd mention it in passing to the twins, catching them up on your days after having your owl classes spent away from each other and by the next day, all semblance of attraction would be lost. The boy would often not look at you, look fearfully at you or worse, would randomly spout big puss filled boils all over his face.
You were ignorant to it in the beginning, but then you began to take it personally thinking that someone was playing a joke on you, getting the boys to pretend to be attracted only to laugh with their friends behind your back.
"Angel I'm telling you that is definitely not happening," George had said to console you as you cried to them both down by the lake after hours.
"We'd have heard about it wouldn't we," he adds, gesturing between him and Fred who looks on at you with worry in his eyes.
"Yeah," Fred nods, "nobody ever says anything bad about you. You're not the kind of girl that would happen to anyway."
"What to your mean?" You'd asked, sounding more than a little pathetic as you sniffled, wiping your nose on the sleeve of your jumper and then casting a spell to clean it off.
"You're pretty, really pretty," George says, a gentle smile on his face.
"More than pretty, that crap only happens to the ugly girls and you are definitely not ugly," Fred says, throwing himself on the floor beside you.
"Probably just lost his nerve that's all," Fred adds, picking up a rock and trying to skim it across the lake.
After that night you watched the interactions closely, anytime a boy would try and approach you, putting on his best smile. Some were nervous, some where cocky but in the end they all ended up the same way, actively avoiding you. It was your sixth year now and you were growing tired of it, leading you to venting your frustrations to the twins during another late night adventure.
"I'm fed up of it! I want to experience going to Hogsmeade with someone,"
"You do that with us," George says with a cocky smirk, but you simply shoot him a glare as you carry on.
"I want to hold someone's hand, have them tell me I look pretty."
"I did that this morning," Fred interjects.
"I want to be dated, i want to be kissed, I want to have sex!"
"I volunteer!" Both twins say, immediately standing up with their hands raised, earning a roll of your eyes as you laughed at the ridiculousness of the situation.
"Both of you sit down and shut up!" You laugh, pushing them back to lean on the stone wall they were originally sat on. "I'm serious, I think there's something wrong with me."
"There's not a single thing wrong with you princess," Fred says, turning to George who backs him is with a slow shake of his head. "Those boys are just idiots, you're better off with us."
When the Yule Ball was announced and people started immediately bagging dates, your concern only grew as time passed and you weren't asked. It was strange, you'd see the boys looking at you, heard rumours they were going to ask you from your friends but then nothing seemed to happen. Until Cedric came along. You'd been friends since your first year, not overly close but friendly enough, you shared classes together and he was an excellent quidditch player, almost as good as George and Fred.
"Hi, um, how are you?" He asks, cheeks flushed pink as he catches you in the corridor outside the great hall.
"Hi Ced, I'm good thanks how are you?" You smile up at him, confused by his nervousness. His foot was bouncing on the spot and his hands seemed to fluctuate between being in his robe pockets to outside again, almost like he couldn't make up his mind at where to keep them.
"I was wondering," he pauses slightly, "are you with the Weasley twins?"
"Umm no I don't know where they are? I assume they're at dinner," you say with a frown, wondering why he was bringing up Fred and George so randomly. He lets out a nervous chuckle, placing his hands back in his pocket as he shakes his head slightly with a shy smile.
"No I meant, with them, you know," he says, emphasising the 'with' this time.
"Oh, no," you say with a smile, "not with anyone."
"Good," he says quickly before realising what he'd said. "I mean... sorry." It was almost painful to experience this, watching as he stumbled through his words. "I was wondering if you wanted to go."
"There she is!" Fred says, walking over to you having appeared out of the hall, throwing his arm around your shoulder and pulling you tightly to his side.
"Thanks mate, sometimes she wanders off, good job keeping your eye out for her, appreciate it."
Fred pulls you away and you're so stunned that you mindlessly follow him, your mind not able to string two thoughts together as you take a place beside them at the Gryffindor table, taking off your tie so you wouldn't be spotted amongst the crowd of Gryffindors.
"What was that about?" You suddenly ask, snapping out of your confused gaze and looking up accusingly at Fred who's devouring a chicken leg with as much tact and delicacy as Fang would.
"What?" He asks with mouth full of food making you squint at him in disgust as he asks stupid.
The next time it happened, you realised something was up.
Ron and Harry were discussing dates in study class across the table from you when they got the news from Hermione that even Neville had got a date, making him more depressed than ever.
"Y/n, you're a girl," he says, pushing back his hair from his face as he addresses you.
"What gave it away?" You snark, hardly looking up from your parchment as you finish up your sentence. Fred snorts on your right side and goes back to his own writing, if that's what you could call it with his terrible handwriting. You can almost feel George beside you tensing up, his shoulders squaring as he looks at his brother, watching him closely.
"We'll have you got a date? You could go with me," Ron says with a little shrug, unsure of himself.
"She's already going with us, back off little brother," Fred says suddenly, eyes snapping up to glare at his younger brother with the same viciousness as his tone.
"Since when?" You ask, eyeing him curiously.
"You want to?" He asks, wiggling his eyebrows at you. You look towards George who looks on expectantly and you relent, knowing that it would be better to go with your best friends than go alone.
"Fine," you say, "but no funny business," you warn them both, stretching out your index finger to point at the both of them accusingly.
"Never," George says dramatically, closing his eyes as if the very thought was unheard of, making you glare at him.
Apparently the word didn't spread quick enough about you going with Fred and George because only two hours later you were asked by Justin.
"Well I wasn't sure if you were going with them both or not, I heard it last week but you hadn't said anything since," he explains after you'd tried to delicately let him down.
"Wait what? Last week?" You ask, confused by his words. He nods slowly, as if you should know.
"Yeah I heard them telling Lee that you were going with both of them, which you know Lee, it spread quicker than jam on toast. No one really thought anything of it at first, I mean George said ages ago that you're practically dating them."
"Excuse me."
The realisation had your head spinning, had they really be plotting for this long. It was then all along?
"Oi Weasley and Weasley, open up!" You said loudly, banging on their dorm room door, having crept in with Ginny on the way in past the portrait hole.
"Our favourite girl, how can we be of service?" Fred asks as he opens up the door, giving you a brilliant smile. He's shirtless and you falter slightly at the unexpectedness of the view. When he catches you looking he winks playfully as he shuts the door.
"Still want no funny business?" He teases, hopping down onto his bed.
"I know it was you two," you say, catching George unaware as he walks out of the bathroom, seeing you stood by the door. "It all makes perfect sense now! You've been pushing the lads away haven't you! Practically bloody dating?" You shout, shooting George a thunderous look. "Bit suspicious that the last three blokes that tried to ask me out have a) magically developed a face full of boils, b) had his eyebrows burnt off and c) got a bloody black eye from your stupid telescope! Tell me now, is it a coincidence?"
For the first time, you see the twins share a look between themselves before their faces twist into guilty expressions.
"It's just," Fred begins.
"You belong with us," George says, taking a seat opposite where you stood on his bed.
"Excuse me?" You say, brows pulling together as you send them both a harsh glare.
"You're ours princess, you always have been. Just like we're yours."
You're speechless as you look between them both, seeing them looking back at you with expressions you'd never seen in them. They looked hungry, honest and slightly vulnerable, rendering you completely mute until you could find the right words.
"How long?"
"Can't remember," Fred replies quickly, honestly. "Before you first came home with us for the holidays."
"That was third year!"
"Second year then," he says with a shrug, completely unashamed to be answering so honestly, unashamed of his feelings.
"The bloody sorting ceremony if I'm being honest," George says a bit less bluntly, "but definitely when you threw that snowball straight at Fred's head for calling you badger girl," he says with a chuckle, making a smile appear on your face.
"I swear I've still got a mark from that!" Fred says with a smirk and you roll your eyes at his dramatics. "Should have been a bloody beater with that aim."
“I’ll beat you now,” you threaten playfully, watching as his face erupts with a devilish grin.
“Beat me off whenever you like,” he retort and you have to fight rolling your eyes again as a smile tugs at your face.
It's quiet for a moment, no one speaking, not knowing how to proceed.
"You really mean it? You… both…me?"
"Yup,” they both say, as if it was nothing, as if you’d asked them to borrow a pencil.
“Told you Angel, we’re yours, always have been. If you’ll have us.” They both look up at you with hope clearly plastered across their faces, eyes twinkling as they show their vulnerability.
“One condition,” you say, cocking an eyebrow up at them.
“Anything princess,” Fred says.
“No more pranks on lads that talk to me, not everyone was trying to ask me out you know.”
They look like they’re going to protest, not liking the idea of the lads talking to you especially if you were now theirs but you smirk and decide to put their minds at ease.
“Once everyone knows I’m yours, officially this time, it won’t be a problem.”
“And how to we do that?” George asks, squinting a little.
“Either of you ever given a love bite?”
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railingsofsorrow · 2 months
Text
Epilogue
[peter parker x reader]
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summary: harry finds your behaviour slightly suspicious & there's an evening spent between friends.
pairing: p.parker x f!reader; slightly harry osborn x f!reader; mj x felicia hardy.
w.c: 3.3K
warnings/content: jealousy; injuries (mentioned); protective harry osborn; language; migraines (mentioned); clumsy but committed peter parker (yes, he learnt from his mistakes. finally); discussion about the multiverse theory; angst but there's more fluff this time sadly; minor character's death (mentioned).
A/N: this fic has come to an end :( it was fun writing this. my first experience in writing a short spiderman fic, it was so hard to come up with a good ending and it probably still not perfect but I feel like it's a good enough one. I hope you like it too and that you'll come back to read more of my spiderman stuff, cause there will definitely be more! good reading, people <3
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“So they're just gone?”  
You turn your neck to glare at your friend. Ever since you mentioned your migraines to him one day and he saw one of your episodes once or twice — a little bit more than that — he hasn't stopped bugging you about it. He wanted you to go to the doctors to get checked out. Until, well. Until the migraines miraculously vanished. Your head never bothered you anymore and you're even sleeping better, given the lack of dark circles around your eyes.  
Harry wasn’t having it.  
First and foremost, he did not believe continuous migraines were cured just like that. Overnight. Because how come he saw you incapable of watching a lecture one day and you're perfectly fine on the other?  
Either you are popping some pills or someone magically healed you.  
He didn't like any of the options. 
He was still worried, okay? Harry cares. He may not be loud with it, but it's you, so he cares. And he cares a lot. You should know better than to just outright lie to him. 
“Yes. Why does it matter? I'm fine, shouldn't you be happy I'm no longer whining on your shoulder?” 
“You're not taking drugs, are you?” 
A surprised laugh echoed around the room and he almost felt his body melt at the sight of your curled up frame from how much you were laughing.  
“It amazes me,” you said between chuckles. “that you'd think I'd pull that off.” Not without him knowing, at least. You and Harry are side by side for almost the entire day.
“I don't doubt you.” 
“You're losing faith in me.” 
“I never had it.” He huffs out a laugh when you throw a pillow at his face, hitting him right on his nose. He fell on his bed with a groan, you moved his homework out of the way before he could mess it up by laying on top of it.  
“Just... tell me if it gets to that point again, okay? 
You look at him, contemplating something that he can't figure out. With the way you avoid his eyes as you answer, he knows you decided to say something else instead of that first thought. “I will. But it won't.” He found the conviction in your voice strange. You can't know if it will ever get that bad again. Just as the migraines miraculously left, they might come back.  
He didn’t question it further. 
You went back to your homework, sharing some insights on his as he does with yours. It didn’t last long until your phone started blaring beneath the pillow you're perched on, the sound being slightly muffled by the fabric.  
You feel Harry's teasing before he can sputter out a sentence.  
“Shut up.” You hissed, picking up the call without looking at the caller ID.  
“One Direction. Really?” 
“Hello.” You pointedly turn away from his smirky face. You have to take the phone away from your ear due to some loud police sirens that come from the line.  
“Hi, hello!” The distinctive voice of Peter Parker replies. Yelling. That was the only way you would be able to hear him anyway. “There's been a thing and I— Shit!”  
You concluded the phone is thrown away because his voice suddenly sounds very far. 
You offered Harry a lousy excuse to step out into the hallway, frowning at the other voices and the police sirens you could hear.  
“Peter, you—” 
“I'm back!” Again, you take the phone away from your ear with a sigh. “Sorry, I was— I was busy.” You gathered that fact by the way he sounded breathless.  
“Are you running?” 
“No!” The noise proceeded to quieten down and you raise an eyebrow at his blatant lie. “Sorry, was I loud? Feels like I was being loud. Sorry.” A door is closing and he's groaning at the end of the line. Instead of finding it funny, you start to get worried, picturing a dislocated shoulder or maybe a deep gash on his arm like last time.  
You and Peter made an agreement. When you agreed to be friends again — part of that starting over bullshit that was your idea — you and him worked on filling each other out on both of your lives. Just catching up as good friends do. Less than a month later you were patching up his wounds as if you never had stopped doing that in the first place. Sometimes, you'd even think you were back where you started as if it was all back to the start of your story in Queens. Midtown. Making plans with Ned and Peter for the weekends. Sitting with MJ at lunch as much as she claimed she hated company. . .
There was a pull at your chest every time you remembered it wasn't like this. You weren't back at that time. You couldn't go back. You only had the now and it had to be enough. It was enough.  
“Peter, are you hurt?” But you still felt the same agony whenever the idea of Peter being hurt came across your mind. An unsettling fear settling up in your core.  
“No.” he shuffled around, clearing his throat. His voice was back for you to hear it clearly. “I'm fine. Just a bank robbery downtown and I—” he paused to let out a heavy sigh. “I'm sorry I'm late, I'll be there in a second, okay?” 
You blink, confused. “What? Late for what, Peter?” 
“Hanging out?” He said followed by a tinge of uncertainty. “Uh, you said that after class—” 
Your brows shot up in recognition. “Oh! Yeah, that's—” Then you checked the time on your phone. You were supposed to meet after class to hang out around 5 p.m. It was still 3 in the afternoon. “Peter,” you held in a chuckle. “That's like, two hours away. You're not late.” 
There's silence on his end and you start laughing.  
“Oh,” he mumbled, letting out a breath of relief. “That's— That's good. I was thinking that I was like really really late and—”  
“You're good, webs.” You softly reassured him. Peter has been working really hard to make sure he doesn't mess up with you again. That included arriving early at places. “Are you at home?” 
“Yeah, I just got here.”  
“Mhm. And you're not hurt at all?” 
“Just a few scratches,” Peter answered with hesitancy. You smiled triumphantly. Not because you're happy he's hurt but because you knew you were right. “I'm fine, alright? You don't have to come.” 
“Okay.” You said, stepping back into your dorm room, catching Harry eying your frame from your bed curiously. “No broken limbs though, right?” 
Peter's scoff put a smile on your lips. “Have some faith in me. I can handle a robbery.”  
The joke Spiderman can handle a robbery but Peter Parker is still clumsy almost slips out but, thankfully, you remember you're not alone.  
“Sure. I'll see you later.” 
“Hey,” he called your name before you could hang up so you waited for him to speak. “Do you— are you going— how are you— I mean...” 
“Peter, breathe.” 
You didn’t notice Harry's eye-roll, too busy cracking up at Peter's stuttering mess.  
“Okay. Alright. Are you going by yourself? Cause I can pick you up and we can go, you know, so you don't have to go alone?” He clarified, a strain in his voice as if he's been choking up to say that.  
“Oh. Harry and I are going to head out together, actually. He's here.” 
You patiently waited for his response. “Of course. Yeah. Okay. I'll see you later then. You and— and Harry. And everyone else.” 
“Yeah.” You sat down on the bed, biting the inside of your cheek. A weird feeling of guilt in in your chest. “See you later, then. Bye.” 
You don't know why you feel guilty about turning him down. All of you would meet in the same place anyway so it's not like you weren't gonna see him, right? It's just a matter of logistics.  
“Was that your boyfriend?” 
You gave Harry a blank stare as you threw your phone to the side to go back to your assignment. One of his eyebrows arched up in defiance, he played your game of not looking away for a few minutes before you got sick of it.  
“I wonder if the reason you're bothered by Peter is because you secretly have a crush on him.” 
He looks away first and your lips spread into a satisfied smirk.  
“Parker's not my type.” Harry uttered, leaning over your lap to mark a question that you had gotten wrong. His curls tickling your chin. “And this is wrong. It's not fifteen, it's fifty.” He decided to add for good measure, stepping out of your personal space. “I'm not bothered by him.” 
You hummed quietly, erasing the previous calculation to redo the math.  
“Who is your type anyway?” You asked, trying to cut through the tension. Every time you mention Peter, Harry's mood shifted. He got too quiet. He just didn’t like him for some reason you couldn't yet figure out. Peter and he haven't met before, that much you know. You claim you'll be out of this, because it's none of your business, some people just don't like each other, it happens. But you're curious and if the opportunity to find out the X of the equation comes, you won't run from it. 
“You'll never know.” His mumble is so low that you wouldn't have heard it if you weren't sitting so close to each other. He steals the pen you were using, earning a frown from you. “I like this one better.” 
“Buy one for you then,” you complained, not moving to get the pen back from him. You take the one he was using instead, eager to finish the assignment so you can have the rest of the afternoon free with your friends. 
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 
[Pete]: (Picture attached)  
[Pete]: Do you want this back? 
When you opened the text message, your breath hitched. The image Peter had sent you showed the red scarf, the one you never let go of. You hadn't seen it in a while, ever since... Ever since you paid him a visit that night. The night you were set on burning the scarf along with that collection of pictures you found in your room.  
You've been to Peter's place countless times after that, though. You wondered why he never mentioned anything.  
[You]: Keep it. 
You sighed, conflicted with that short answer. You weren't being rude, you didn't meant to be. But you didn't need the scarf anymore. Not when you have him back in your life. You realized the scarf represented everything the two of you lived and everything you didn't.  
You didn't want it back. You weren't ready. 
Not now, at least. You hoped he wouldn't be hurt by it. 
[You]: Maybe one day you can give it back to me.  
Satisfied with your reply, you slipped your phone into your pocket, standing up to help Harry carry five smoothies toward your table. Ned and MJ were on their way, as for Peter, you figured it was the same. His apartment wasn't that far from where you were.  
“I know a loser when I see one.”  
“Hello, MJ.” You greeted after taking the first sip of your smoothie. You offer her hers and she bumps your hip, sitting beside you in the booth as a greeting. “Where's Ned?” You asked, frowning now that you didn't see the boy arriving along with her. They were always together.  
She shrugged, leaning back. “He said he would be ten minutes late. He was gonna get Peter so they could go to this store nearby his place before coming here.”  
You didn't take long to acknowledge which store she was talking about. An eye roll later, you crack out a smile in amusement. 
“The Star Wars one?” 
She nodded and the three of you quickly entered a conversation about a movie that was airing on the local theatre. Ned and Peter arrived in the middle of your discussion, a few bags in their hands that earned your curiosity.  
“Did you buy the whole store?” You joked, the edge of your lips curling up as Peter sat down in front of you, placing two little bags on the corner of his seat.  
Peter raised an eyebrow at you, amusement all over his features. “Did I?” 
“Looks like it.” 
“Oh, this is—!” Ned exclaimed, taking a sip of his smoothie. Harry held back a laugh at the boy's blissed-out state. “You got it right.” He then pointed at Harry accusingly. “I love you.” 
Harry shrugged, “I know.”  
“The one time I got your order wrong—” MJ begins. 
“You never get the right one.” Ned deadpanned, interrupting MJ's speech. The girl kicked his chin under the table and Ned proceeded to kick hers back. Just before the childish fight could escalate, you pull both of their ears and hear whining asking you to stop.  
Peter and Harry were chucking and you have to backtrack because Harry wasn't glaring at Peter for the first time. Is this progress? 
After a mindless walk to the nearest park, all of you silently decided to stick around for a while longer, basking in what was left of the sunset and the hues of orange, pink and blue that mixed together to form the purple sky of the evening.  
You teased MJ at her inability to stop texting her girlfriend while in an evening among friends and she flipped you off immediately, blushing. She's been seeing Felicia Hardy for two months and from what you could see, it was becoming rather serious, even though MJ still cannot admit it. You know your best friend and her hidden smiles and secret joy because of a new person she's interested in. 
“No, no, no. You don't get it. It's like different universes in one— Actually, no. Multiple universes that are currently happening right now. You could be you, but you're, I don't know, a villain in this other universe, while here, you're just Harry.” 
Both of your and Peter's neck snapped as you turned towards the conversation between Harry and Ned.  
Harry carried a crease between his brows, confusion twisting the corner of his lips. 
“So I'm me... but different?” 
Ned nodded vehemently. He'd always get excited whenever the topic of multiverse was brought up.  
You, on the other hand, were tense and you did not have to look at Peter to know his reaction as well. 
“I'm sure in every reality you're an entitled filthy rich bastard the same way. Don't worry.” MJ’s comment was enough you breathe again. Peter’s awkward laugh at your side.
Harry rolls his eyes, “and I'm sure you're sarcastic and bitchy about anything and anyone, Jones.” 
You throw your head back to stare up at the sky. 
“Children.” You mocked. Peter attempted to hide his laugh but he was not successful. You found it endearing how his cheeks slowly turned pink. It reminded you of when you were kids, he'd turn into a tomato every time he tried to hold in his laugh. “Behave.” 
They initiated a bickering about she started it and he started it and Ned made a comment to side with Harry to add fire to the flames.  
Sometimes you thought they could remember and then reality crashed down the moment for what it truly was. It could be good and bad at the same time. Bittersweet might be the right term to name the feeling. Of course you miss everything that was, but what currently is is also good, in a way. You have your people, despite the losses, you have him back and it's all that you could ask for. 
“Peter.”  
He gives you a sheepish smile, looking down at his shoes as he buried his hand in his jacket.  
“Did you like it?” 
You close the small box carefully. “How could I not? It's beautiful. I loved it.” You said, then punched his shoulder playfully. He pretends it hurts, but you know it doesn't. “Don't spend that much money on me, Parker.” 
Peter shrugged, playing the nonchalant part. “I'll do what I want, actually.” 
“You're such an annoying little shit, aren't you?” 
He shrugged again, this time he's got a cocky grin and a little smug attitude you recognized from when he got an answer right and you got one wrong in an assignment. It's a glimpse of the carefree nature of Peter Parker. He's a little bit proud at times, but still clumsy around people, shy between strangers, and wears his heart on his sleeve for the people he truly cares about.  
“You love it.” 
“Help me,” you asked him when everyone stopped by the fountain on your way back to university. You had your back to him and he finally understood what he was supposed to do when he saw your fingers holding the two parts of the necklace behind your neck. He stepped forward, taking both parts from your hands and freezing once your fingers met. Your skin was cold. You shivered as he clasped the necklace, adjusting with a shaky sigh. His throat moved under his hard gulp. “Thank you.” You turned around with the little rose gold maple leaf pendant around your neck.  
Peter blinked at you in a daze. The streetlight illuminated your figure as you moved your hair away from your shoulders so it wasn't curling around the necklace anymore.  
You're beautiful. So beautiful.  
As soon as he saw the maple leaf pendant, you came into his mind. It reminded him of the Fall, your favorite season, which, of course, led him to you. Funny that everything, somehow, lead him to you. He doesn't know what his life would be if it didn't. Nothing would make much sense, honestly. Peter didn't know how the other Peter Parkers handled losing you in their universe. It was such a difficult thought for him to even consider. His initial goal was to protect you and if that meant he had to let you go, then so be it. He would do it. Because you deserved a life without the mess that was his life. You deserved peace and happiness. But that plan backfired when he saw you crossing the street to reach a coffee shop. It was 8pm in the evening and he was on patrol. He had stopped two robberies an hour before so he was getting ready to go home and throw himself into bed, give a rest to his alter ego for the night. Until you showed up, crossing the street so distracted that a car almost hit you. Peter pulled you back in time, a hand on your shoulder to steady you from the scare of the car horn. You had been crying and at the moment Peter's only thought was to comfort you and figure out who had made you feel that way.  
“Myself.” You laughed, tearfully. “Sorry. I wasn't paying attention.” 
He convinced himself that from that point on he had to watch over you, to simply make sure you wouldn't cross the street without looking both ways again, or trip mad and get a severe head injury. He'd watch you from afar, it couldn't do any harm. 
In reality, that was Peter's way of not letting you go and it had not been fair to either one of you. Especially you, who earned headaches and migraines and insomnia because of memories begging to come back, memories that shouldn't have been removed at all.  
Peter disappointed you. He disappointed himself too — and probably Aunt May, who must be shaking her head in disapproval wherever she was watching over him from. He's slowly making peace with himself after everything. He's finally seen that having you close by was better than the heartache of letting you go and trying foolishly to move on. He didn't want to move on from you and if that was selfish. . . that was fine. Peter was never anything besides selfless his entire life. And if you wanted to be in his life, why couldn't he want to be in yours?  
He would acknowledge the past and make the best out of the present. As for the future, well, he wasn't concerned, it would probably lead him to you. As always.  
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allysunny · 7 days
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Lover, Everything I Do, I Do It for the Love of You
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Pairing: Yandere!Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader
Synopsis: Your marriage to Aaron seemed like a dream come true. But beneath his loving facade lies a dark obsession, which you find out too late. As Aaron's controlling nature turns more abusive, you're forced to confront the nightmare your life has become. How much longer will you be able to endure his twisted version of "love"?
Words: 13k words
Warnings: Yandere, controlling, obsessive and abusive behaviour. Probably OOC Aaron, but, well, it's kind of the point. I'm not joking here, this is terrifying. No happy endings here. Abusive relationship, emotional blackmail, emotional and physical abuse, gaslighting, Aaron is terrible in this one, I'm so sorry, physical violence, angst, lots of crying, mentions of pregnancy. If I forgot anything, do let me know!!!
A/N: Hey everyone!!! Oh my god, I have finally posted the yandere!hotch fic. I'm sorry it took me so long, I had this one stupid exam I had to study for - I studied like a bitch okay, please pray for me, I hope I get a good grade.
Anyways, here it is!!! I'm very proud of this one - I've had this specific scenario in my head for a while and I really wanted to write it out. I'm also aware of the fact that Aaron being abusive and controlling and posessive might be extremely OOC, but I just really wanted to explore a potential darker version of him.
I really hope you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it!
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You were reading on your couch when the front door opened, causing you to look up in anticipation.
That’s how you usually passed the time, nowadays. Reading. You had other hobbies, sure. Things like baking and knitting and crocheting and gardening and pottery and probably dozens of others you could name. Things that kept you busy while you were home. Things that kept you from missing him too much when he was gone. Things that kept you from going insane. But he’d just arrived, so your book was quickly discarded on top of the couch, and your feet brought you to him, almost as if second nature – because it probably was. You’d always find your way to Aaron Hotchner.
“Welcome home!” you all but exclaiming, throwing your arms around his neck. He reciprocated the gesture, although opting to wrap his around your waist, as his head dropped to the crook of your neck.
“Hello, dear,” he whispered against your skin, shoulders dropping in relief. Aaron loved coming home to you. He loved coming to you – his home. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too,” you ran your fingers through his hair, happy to hold him so close after such few long days. You missed him so much every time he was gone, so cherishing the moments when he was home was a must. “Thought about you all the time.”
“Really? Because I thought about you the whole time,” Aaron replied, pushing away from you to kiss the top of your forehead. He smelled like cologne and exhaustion, like the dangers of his work, a smell you were far too familiar with by now. “How about I take a quick shower and then you can tell me all about your week?”
You nodded excitedly, sending your husband off to clean himself while you got the kitchen ready for dinner. You usually ate at around seven, and it was nearly six, so if you wanted to spend some time in the couch talking to Aaron, you had to at least get everything ready. You heard the water running and smiled to yourself – how nice it was to have him home after so many days all by yourself. You prepared the ingredients and placed every tool exactly where it should be, so you could quickly get to making dinner.
In a few minutes, your husband was back, wearing a simple black shirt (that hugged his arms incredibly well, making your mouth water at the sight), and a pair of loose grey sweatpants. You loved seeing him like this – Not the fearless SSA Aaron Hotchner, nor the stoic Unit Chief, nor the commanding Agent Hotchner. He was simply Aaron, sweet, sweet Aaron who discarded his suits for comfortable sweats, who switched crime for a night of cooking and dancing in the kitchen with you, who would protect you and keep you safe all his life.
“Welcome back, handsome,” you smiled at him as he walked towards you and wrapped his arms around your waist, effectively trapping you against the kitchen counter.
“Thank you, beautiful.” Aaron raised his hand to caress your cheek and you leaned into his touch, sighing contentedly. “So, tell me. How was your day?”
You told him all about it.
How after he left, you cooked a massive breakfast spread for yourself, preparing different kinds of toasts, jams, sides, and drinks. After you were done, you sat outside, bathing in the soft morning sunlight, a toast in your hand, and your newest book acquisition in the other. You told him how you did some nice spring cleaning, dusting off the windows and the cabinets to keep the dust and cobwebs out. You told him about your lunch, which you gobbled up happily as you caught up on your favourite show, and how in the afternoon, you alternated between sewing and reading and painting, and the other thousand hobbies you had.
You loved Aaron. You really did. He was your husband, the love of your life, the only person you wanted to spend eternity with. You loved waking up to him and feeling his arms around you as you fell asleep. You’d jump in front of a train for him, take a bullet for him, and you would spend the rest of your lives together showing him just how much you did truly love him. He was your soulmate.
“Did you leave the house?” he asked softly, hand still caressing the soft skin of your cheek.
You loved Aaron. You really did.
“No.”
That’s why you lied.
Aaron was protective. He’d lost coworkers, friends, and his ex-wife to his gruesome job, and he worried so very much about you. He could be overprotective, though.
He searched your face for any kind of doubt, of untruthfulness, or deceit. You worried he would be able to read you like an open book – after all, you’d been married for a few years now. He probably could. But you prided yourself in being able to do some little profiling of your own, and schooled your features into a soft smile, the one you knew had him weak.
“Good.” His hand dropped to your neck, where he slowly rubbed circles with his thumb. “Wouldn’t want you in any danger.”
“I know,” you mumbled with a small shrug.
“I love you. All I want is for you to be safe.”
“I know. I love you too.”
After a while of gazing into your eyes, Aaron pulled away, but not before placing a chaste kiss on top of your head. “How about we get started on dinner? No need to rush this way.”
You nodded towards him and settled around the kitchen.
You moved around each other like second nature, passing tools and ingredients back and forth as you needed them. The soft humming of the radio Aaron had turned on buzzed in the background, making the atmosphere much more domestic. Sometimes you stole glances at him and smiled at his focused expression. The furrowed brows and thinly pressed lips, the image of composure and dedication. That’s who Aaron was, through and through. Dedicated.
Since you took your sweet time, dinner was ready at exactly seven o’clock. Punctual, just how Aaron liked it. You set the table and were sat down to eat before ten past seven. Precise, just how Aaron liked it.
As you ate, he told you about his day. The files on top of his desk he had to review, the case he had to go on, the intricacies of his job. Aaron never went into too much detail – he did not want to taint you with the ugliness of his job, wanted to keep you beautiful and untouched forever. You did not need to know all the ugly details he and his team had to deal with.
“Speaking of, JJ is organising a birthday party for Henry,” Aaron mentioned. “She has invited us.”
You were so happy you could burst with joy.
“Really?” You asked, putting down your fork to look at him with a bright smile on your face.
“Really. Would you like to go?”
“Yes!” It came out more eager than what you expected, so you tried to cough it out and try again. “Yeah, I’d really love that, Aaron. I miss the kids so much.”
“I thought you might. It’s settled then, we’re going.”
You ate the remainder of your food with a smile playing on your lips, and a small idea turning in your head. He seemed to be in a good mood. He took a relaxing shower, helped you make dinner, and had now told you the two of you were going to a birthday party. Surely, he was feeling happy, surely you could try and sweeten your night a bit more.
“You know, maybe it’s a good time to mention that Mrs. Robinson came by yesterday,” you said, trying to be as casual as possible.
Aaron immediately looked up, raising an eyebrow at you.
“Why did she come here? What did she want?”
“Gosh, Aaron, you act as if she’s a psychopathic serial killer,” you said with a small laugh, trying to lighten the mood. “She’s a sweet old lady.”
“Hm. So? Why did she stop by?”
“She wanted to know if I was interested in joining her book club.”
Aaron went back to eating his food, and you saw it as your chance to keep talking.
“They meet at the library every Thursday to discuss the books they’re reading. Some neighbourhood ladies are part of it, and she sees me reading in the garden so she thought I might be interested.”
Your husband kept eating, looking at the plate before him. You kept talking.
“I am. Interested, that is. I’d love to join her book club.”
“No.”
Your felt your stomach sinking but fought against it. Do not be emotional. Be rational. Be assertive. See this through.
“Why not?” you asked, bringing your glass of water to your lips. Be casual. It’s a request like any other. You’re not desperate.
“Because I don’t think it is a good idea.” He still refused to meet your eyes.
“You think it’s a bad idea for me to meet with a bunch of old ladies at the local library to discuss books?”
“I do. And I don’t want you doing it.”
“Aaron, come on. It’s just a book club, it’s not like anything is going to happen to me.” You pleaded, dreading the feeling of your throat tightening. You knew it meant the tears weren’t long due.
“Every week for God knows how long?” This time he raised his head, looking at you straight in the eyes. Unfortunately, you did not recognise your sweet husband in them. This was all Unit Chief, all SSA, all Agent. “If you create a pattern, you’ll be easier to track. I won’t have that happen to you.”
“I’ll be safe, I promise. I can take cabs instead of walking.”
“Abductions can occur better that way. Once you’re taken to a second location, your chances of survival decrease dramatically.”
“I’ll carry pepper spray then. Take self-defence classes.��
“Pepper spray is nothing to an experienced killer.”
“What if I take the bus?”
“You can’t expect me to agree to you going on a public transport where countless other strangers could also be.”
“I’ll get a ride with some of the ladies then.” You were running out of excuses, out of options, out of ways to convincing him, and the harshness of his voice and eyes were causing you to tear up quicker than expected.
“They might have ulterior motives.”
“They’re sweet old ladies, Aaron, I’ll be fine.” You were exasperated by now, voice shaky and wobbly. “It’s just a book club, it’s not like anything will happen to me – “
“I said no.” Aaron smacked his hands on the dinner table, causing you to flinch backwards. You looked at him, wide eyes in terror and tears streaming down your face. Aaron had never raised your voice at you, and while he was sometimes physical with the world around him – not you, though, never you – this was the first time in a while he took out his frustrations like this. You thought he had been doing well. You thought you had been doing well.
Turns out you were wrong.
“You will not be leaving this house any time soon, not for a book club, not for anything.” He looked at you with the stern gaze solely reserved for criminals, unsubs, for people who did bad things, for the bad people he caught. You never thought you’d be in the receiving end of this stare. It made your stomach churn. You hated it. “And I’m starting to think it’s a bad idea to go to Henry’s birthday party. I’ll tell JJ we’re otherwise engaged.”
Your eyes widened even more, if that was even possible, and you shook your head repeatedly.
“No – please, don’t. I miss them so much, I miss the team, I miss the kids, I – “ You stuttered pathetically, trying to keep the tears from falling, but failing miserably.
“You’re going to stay here, and you’re not going to go anywhere else. Understood?” He asked you, voice booming in the tiny kitchen, making you feel small and weak and utterly powerless – Aaron had you stuck to your chair without having even touched you.
“I want to go out – please, JJ invited us! I haven’t seen everyone in so long, I’m sorry, please let me go.”
Aaron said your name with a sternness and venom you had never recognised before in your shared time together. It made your surprised expression fall, leaving only sadness.
“I won’t tolerate any more defiance from you. If I were you, I’d watch my words carefully. You know I have never so much as even lifted a hand towards you, but I won’t hesitate to show you what happens when you disobey me. Is that clear?”
Pure, sheer terror was running through your veins. You never thought you’d see Aaron like this. You’d upset him once or twice when he first set the boundaries you now lived by, but he had never behaved the way he was behaving now. It terrified you, and all you wanted was your sweet Aaron back, the one that had cooked dinner with you earlier, the one who had tasted the food off your lips for a “quality check” and pinched your side playfully when you made a dirty joke. Not whoever this was.
You quickly stood up, placing your dishes in the dishwasher, and ran to your shared bedroom, where you slammed the door behind you (a terrible idea and you knew it, but you were far too upset to care) and collapsed on your bed, sobbing uncontrollably.
You wanted to go out. You wanted to go meet JJ and the team, wanted to talk to all of them again. Wanted to discuss books with Spencer and advise Penelope on the new nail polish you’d began using. Wanted to ask Rossi for wine recommendations, because your anniversary with Aaron was approaching and you wanted to order him something nice – order, of course. You never shopped by yourself in person.
In fact, you never shopped in person anymore.
Aaron’s rules had started out simple. You could understand why a man like him would want to protect you from the horrors of this world. But as the weeks turned into months, and the months turned into years, the rules had shifted, the boundaries reinforced, and you felt more caged than ever. Nowadays, you’re not allowed to leave the house. Period. You can go to your backyard, sunbathe in your garden, and spend some time there, but aside from that, you’re confined to the walls of your house.
Sometimes, Aaron offered you to take you places. He hadn’t, in a long time. Henry’s birthday party would be the first time in months you’d leave your house. Well, save for that secret escapade of yours, but that was not nearly enough to satiate your hunger for the outside world.
And now that was gone.
You wailed loudly, hugging your pillow, and wishing for things to be different. You missed going out. You missed talking to your friends over coffee or tea and strolling down the park when the weather was nice. You barely saw your friends nowadays. They were too busy with their lives, and often met up with each other to hang out. Your reply, unfortunately, had become the same.
Sorry girls, I’m busy.
It was disheartening and you hated it. But you also loved Aaron, which made everything harder.
Speaking of Aaron, you thought about your little secret outing of today. You put on some baggy clothes, wore a pair of sunglasses, and walked to the nearest park. You sat down on the grass, watched as people walked by, even pet a few dogs. It wasn’t much, and it wasn’t really a luxurious outing, but it had been exactly what you needed. Some fresh air, some real walking, not the pacing you did around the house, worrying yourself and driving yourself insane. You thought no one had recognised you, which was great, because you had no idea what Aaron would do if he found out.
That’s why he couldn’t.
You stayed there, crying your heart out, clutching your pillow like a lifeline. All you’d asked Aaron was to go to a book club. Surely that did not warrant the level of protection he was intent on giving you, right? Surely, going out every Thursday to discuss books with half a dozen old ladies was not that bad, right?
After a while – was it seconds? Minutes? Hours? You couldn’t tell – you heard the bedroom door being opened and felt the bed dip by your side.
“Go away,” you mumbled, not interested in whatever kind of comfort he was about to give you. You wanted to cry, to scream, to yell. You wanted to walk outside and do all the things you had been forbidden to do. Instead, you curled away from him, eyes tightly closed.
“Honey…” Aaron mumbled, but not attempting to scoot closer. “I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I am.”
“You’re not.”
“I am. I never wanted to yell at you like that or threaten you. I’m really sorry for my behaviour.”  His hand slowly crept up to your shoulder, and he caressed your skin through the soft fabric of your shirt. You knew Aaron liked to have his hands on you. While in public (well, whenever you two went out in public at least), he hated PDA, behind closed doors he was a clingy mess, reaching to touch you at every moment. “You just have to understand that I care about you, and I want to keep you safe.”
“A book club isn’t going to hurt me,” you choked out, shaking your head against the covers.
“When you have a job like mine, see the things I see… it’s hard to draw the line between what could be safe and what couldn’t.” Aaron reached forward, brushing some strands of hair out of your face and sighing. “I’m sorry. I know I worry too much, but whenever I go to work and see all the terrible things that happen to innocent people… It’s not nice, darling. It makes me even more anxious.”
You turned around tentatively, not wanting to let him win this argument and your good graces back so quickly, but still willing to listen to whatever he had to say.
“Whenever I think of the possibility that one day, it could be your picture I’m looking at in my conference room… I don’t think I can describe the anguish it causes me.”
You hummed softly. Aaron dropped his hand to his side, and you hesitantly picked it back up. Goodness, you did not even want to think of that possibility. Him trying to solve your murder. Your murder. You being hurt and tortured and killed.
That was an outcome you never wanted to face. Just thinking of the pain it would cause Aaron makes your stomach do a very unpleasant flip.
“And after I told you about Henry’s birthday, I thought you’d be happy. I thought you’d like it, being able to leave for a while and hang out with my team – I know how much you love them.” A small smile graced Aaron’s lips, and it almost lifted your spirits. Almost. “But instead of that, you asked me for more. I just felt like you weren’t being grateful of what I offered you. Like you wanted more than what I could give you. And after the week I had… I think I just exploded. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.”
Oh.
“I wasn’t even sure if I was going to tell you about the birthday party… I wanted to keep you here, away from all harm. But I knew just how happy it would make you, so I overlooked my own fear. And it felt like you weren’t being appreciative of what I was giving you. I’m sorry, honey. I really am.”
Embarrassment crept up to your cheeks.
He was right.
You knew Aaron was protective. Knew he cared about you. Telling you about Henry’s birthday party must’ve taken a great deal of courage for him, and here you were, asking for even more. You felt foolish right now, you felt like an annoying spoiled brat. And it wasn’t nice at all.
“I’m sorry,” you replied, turning to him fully and scooting closer. He met you halfway and scooped you up in his arms, sitting you down on his lap. You rested your forehead against his chest and only the feel of his arms around you was enough for the waterworks to start again. “I just wanted to go out,” you sobbed into his chest, clutching his shirt, and refusing to meet his eye.
“I know, sweetheart,” he cooed, running his fingers through your hair, and caressing you. “And if you hadn’t said anything about that silly book club, we could’ve gone out and had fun at Henry’s birthday party.”
“I really wanna go, though,” you shook your head and clutched his shirt tighter, “Please, let me go. We can have a good time together. Please, I’ll do anything you say, I’ll be good.”
Aaron pressed a soft kiss on top of your head, hugging you just a tad closer.
“I’m sorry, darling. We can’t go to the birthday party. You need to understand that your actions have consequences, alright? Next time, you won’t be so bratty and ungrateful, and maybe we’ll go.” The harshness of his words felt odd when he said them in such a gentle manner. You knew Aaron was capable of whispering kind words and loving promises, but also knew he could rip people to shreds with his words alone. You just didn’t expect to be at the receiving end of them.
“But I was good…” you sniffled.
“Now, now.” He lifted your chin up with his fingers, gazing into your eyes with that same old affection you were so used to, eyes scanning your face and landing on your red eyes and runny nose. “Is demanding for more time out after I’d just granted you some being good?”
You shook your head, truly embarrassed, but decided not to say anything.
“I don’t think you deserve to go out then.”
It was enough for you to tear up again, heartbreak evident in your eyes and the way loud ugly sobs were ripped from your throat. Aaron simply held you against him, shushing you, placing kisses in whatever spot he could reach. He comforted you silently, as he often did when you were distressed or anxious.
“I’m sorry,” you sobbed, hiding your face against his chest. “I’m sorry, I want to be good, I want to go out, please…”
You sounded so defeated, it broke Aaron’s heart. But at the end of the day, he was only doing his job: protecting you. If it made you cry and suffer a bit, then so be it. You could scream all you wanted, but at least you’d be safe.
“I’m sorry, darling. You need to know your actions have consequences. Tell you what, I’ll make it an even better day, alright?”
You looked up at him, sniffling.
“You will?”
“I will,” brushing a strand of hair aside from your face, Aaron whispered, “We can order some food, if you’d like. Your favourites. Then we can curl up on the couch and watch some movies. We’ll have a cosy day, just the two of us, hm? I’ll even get you that console you’ve told me about, the one you really wanted.”
It’s been a while since you’d been able to have a cosy day with Aaron. He was always so busy with work, and even when he was home, he’d lock himself inside his home office and work some more. The idea of spending a whole day curled up in his arms as you watched movies, played some games and ate your favourite food was extremely tempting. In fact, it was just what you needed.
“Really? Just the two of us?”
“Just the two of us,” he repeated, kissing the top of your head once more and tightening his hold on you. You figured you could do it. A cosy day with your sweet, sweet Aaron.
After all, he was all you needed, right?
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Your cosy day together went extremely well, and it reminded you of why you’d fallen in love with this man. He’d started it by bringing you breakfast in bed, as well as fresh flowers and telling you just how pretty you were and how much he loved you. After you were done eating your share, Aaron decided to have his and spend nearly two hours in between your legs, drawing sweet, sweet noises from you and drinking them up.
After that, you showered together, you spent some time in the garden. Aaron helped you with your flowers and your small vegetable garden, and you even picked up some veggies for lunch – which Aaron so gladly helped you make. After that, you sat on the couch as your husband cleaned the kitchen, picking a movie to watch. You ended up settling on a rom-com – not really your husband’s favourite genre, but it’s not like he could say no to you after he’d promised a day all about you.
After the movie was done, you caught up on some of your buddy-reads. Even if Aaron did not allow you to join a book club, he still made sure to pick books up and read them with you. It was another way to connect with you, even if just for a while. He found himself texting you when on the jet, asking you if you’d made it to chapter 4 of whatever current reading the both of you were going through, and asking you not to spoil him. Today, you managed to finish the thriller you’d picked up a few weeks ago and shared your thoughts and theories over a nice cup of tea.
Then, Aaron prepared a nice bath for the both of you. You drank champagne and ate strawberries as you played with the bubbles and nuzzled into his neck, and you could swear it was the happiest you’d ever been. Later, he’d ordered from your favourite place, and you’d eaten on the couch, laughing at some silly comedy movie you’d been meaning to watch for some time now.
It was a perfect day of Aaron proving to you just how much he loved you, from making you breakfast in bed to even feeding you bite after bite after he jokingly told you his beautiful wife “wouldn’t have to lift a finger while he was home”. It ended up proving to be true, since he did not allow you to do anything.
Later that night, you felt foolish – being ungrateful and bratty, and instead of being mad at you, Aaron was acting like your servant, catering to your every need, and giving you everything you could possibly want. You were so lucky – how come you’d managed to find a man like him? Days like this made you reevaluate your actions towards your husband. It was unfair to treat him the way you did when he was nothing short of a prince or a king.
A king who kept you captive in his tower, a little voice in your head screamed.
You tried not to listen to it.
Aaron had lost people before. He wanted to protect you. To save you. Case closed.
A few weeks later, one Sunday morning, you were looking through your drawers in your bedroom, brow burrowed in confusion.
“Is everything alright, sweetheart?” Aaron asked, walking inside, and leaning against the doorframe. You loved it when he did that, seemingly so carefree and reckless. You thought him to be the most handsome man in the world, and his good looks only increased whenever his brow wasn’t furrowed, or his face buried in work.
“Yeah, I – I just can’t find my phone anywhere,” you huffed, “I could’ve sworn I left it on top of my bedside table.”
“You won’t be finding it any time soon.” Aaron replied nonchalantly, which caused you to turn and raise a questioning eyebrow.
“What?”
“I took your phone from you, honey. I didn’t think you’d be needing it, so I took it away.”
The calmness with which he said these words left you speechless. You loved your phone. It was your connection to the outside world. It was how you texted your friends and documented sweet moments with Aaron. It was how you kept up with your family, and currently, it was how you were preparing for your anniversary, looking for gifts that might be of interest to your husband. To take that away from you was a breach of privacy.
“Why would you do that?” You crossed your arms, sitting down on your bed. Maybe if you spoke with him calmly, rationally, if you didn’t get emotional and desperate, he’d listen to you. It was normal for you to have a phone. No need to take it away.
“I read through your text messages.”
What?
“You did what?”
“You seem to chat an awful lot with Reid. Mind telling me why?”
You scoffed, offendedthat your husband not only went through your texts but was also coming up with some pretty serious – false – accusations.
“Aaron, what the hell are you talking about?” You asked him, trying your best to remain calm.
“In fact, you seem to text him more often than you text me.” A twitch of his jaw.
“That’s because you tell me not to contact you when you’re working.”
“So is Reid and that doesn’t seem to stop you.” A click of his jaw.
“We’re just two friends talking, Aaron. You had no right – “
“You had no right to go behind my back and talk to my coworkers twenty-four-seven. What did you expect me to think, huh?” Aaron approached you, brows furrowed and arms now at his side. You could see his fists were clenched, and it somehow scared you. “Maybe I’ve been too lenient, letting you contact whoever you wanted at any time you wanted. Should I have Garcia look into your search history?”
“You can’t do that!” You stood up, mortified. He wouldn’t do it, now would he? Aaron trusted you – trust was the bane of your relationship, as it was the bane of any relationship. And right now, he was basically telling you he had none for you, taking your privacy away and threatening to investigate your internet activity. You were doing nothing wrong – your usual movie and documentary-watching, book-reading, game-playing, whatever. Hell, you kept it PG and Safe for Work. It’s not like Aaron would be displeased with what he found. But it was still disrespectful, and it proved to you that your husband did not trust you.
“I can, and maybe I will. I’ve been giving you everything and this is how you repay me? By going behind my back? Talking to my coworkers? Am I not enough, is that it? Do you not love your husband anymore?”
You were crying by now, and hated yourself for turning soft, for turning sentimental when you promised you wouldn’t.
“I do love you, Aaron, you’re the only one I want,” you told him, approaching him slowly.
“Then why are you talking to Rossi, of all people, at one in the morning? What could possibly so important that you must call him when we’re away on cases at one in the morning?”
“It’s not that you think!”
“Then what is it, huh? Getting tired of your marriage, is it?”
You lifted your hand to cup Aaron’s face, as you often did when he was nervous or distressed and wanted to calm him down. This time, however, it didn’t go according to your plans. Aaron grabbed your wrist, pressing it uncomfortably until it hurt.
“Fuck – Ow, Aaron, you’re hurting me – “
“I don’t let you outside to keep you safe,” he nearly spat out, “To protect you. And this is what you do? Everything I do, I do it because I love you!”
“You’re hurting me, please let go, we can talk about this – “
“Why were you calling my coworkers so late in the night?” It wasn’t even a question at this point, it was a demand, with how he barked it, twisting your wrist as he yelled.
“Let me go!”
“Answer me!”
“Let me go!”
Aaron pulled you closer to him by your wrist, causing you to wince in pain. Tears were streaming down on your cheeks, and instead of immediately letting go upon noticing them, Aaron just held onto you tighter. “Answer me. Why have you been calling my coworkers so late?”
“I’m just asking for help!” you cried, shaking your head, unable to look your husband in the eyes. “I wanted to give you something nice for your anniversary, so I was asking around!”
This made Aaron stop dead in his tracks. His eyes widened and he loosened the grip on your wrist. Your anniversary. Right. As he watched you stumble back a few steps and caress the bruised skin of your arm, Aaron shook his head. Was he becoming a tyrant? He wasn’t, was he? It was completely normal for him to be worried. Who knew what you could do with a phone. Meet someone else and leave him. Get tricked and hurt. Get taken from him. None were possibilities he wanted to even think about – hence removing this type of contact with the outside world. You were better off where no one could reach you. Where he could protect you and take care of you. After all, your safety and happiness were the only thing Aaron cared about.
And yet here you were, sitting down on your shared bed, sobbing your heart out, clutching your wrist near your chest, far too scared to meet his eye.
He had to fix this. Quick.
“I – “ you hiccupped, looking at the floor, “I called Rossi because I wanted to get you a bottle of w-wine. Something special to c-commemorate a special date.” After you let go of your wrist, no longer that sore (but still red from Aaron’s grip), you hid your face in your hands, shoulders shaking with each sob that got ripped off your throat. “I called the others because I wanted you to have the night to yourself. They were supposed to take on your workload slowly, so you could go home on time on our day.”
Aaron was glued to his spot. He wanted to reach out to you, but he also knew you needed space. He’d behaved like a monster. He felt like a monster. But he wasn’t. Right? You can’t blame a man for wanting to protect his wife. The woman he loves. Everything he did, he did it out of love. Even if it hurt sometimes.
“I just wanted our anniversary to be special.” This seemed to be the breaking point. You fell back on the bed and curled into yourself in a foetal position, crying loudly. “And now the surprise is ruined, and you hate me, and I can’t even have my phone back.”
This seemed to break something inside Aaron as well. Not the bit about your phone – he couldn’t care less about that. The less you could contact the outside world, the better. No, the bit about him hating you. Because how could he ever hate you, the woman he loved above everything else? The woman that made his life worth it? The woman that made getting out of bed every day to catch serial killers worth it? The woman he was working so hard to protect? The woman who had taught him what love was?
“Darling…” he knelt next to the bed and attempted to lay a hand on your leg. You flinched away from him, and he winced. You’d never rejected his touch. Even when you were mad at him, you never found it in yourself to reject him. You both knew how fickle and unpredictable life could be and did not want to waste it in petty quarrels. No one knew what tomorrow may bring.
This seemed different, though.
“I’m so sorry,” he mumbled, moving to sit on the bed next to you. You felt his weight on the mattress and curled into yourself even tighter.
“I just wanted to do something nice…”
“I know. And I’m sorry.”
“And you yelled at me.”
“I shouldn’t have.”
“And hurt me.”
The venom behind your words caused him to grimace. Venom did not taste nice on your tongue. But as much as he wanted to punish you for using that tone with him, he couldn’t. He had to coax you out of your shell, make you trust him again.
“I know. I’m sorry, darling.”
“Are you?”
“I am.”
You stayed in silence for a while. Your sobs eventually subsided, and your breathing evened out as you stared away from your husband. But it was him who broke the silence, not able to bear it any longer.
“May I hold you?”
“I don’t want you to touch me right now. I want you to go away.”
Aaron inhaled deeply. He had to remain calm.
“Darling, please let me hold you. I feel terrible. Please let me make it up to you.”
You pondered it. Right now, all you wanted was to be alone. The last thing you wanted was his hands on you – especially when they’d caused you so much pain just a few minutes ago.
“No. Go away.”
Aaron clenched his fist next to him. Why couldn’t you just understand he was doing this all for you? For your protection?
Still, he sighed and moved to stand up, accepting his defeat – for now. He’d have to win you over, but he couldn’t do that right now, when your head was still hot and your hatred for him probably ran deep.
“If you need me, I’ll be in the living room.”
After Aaron closed the door behind him, you felt into a deep slumber.
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Next morning, you awoke to the smell of pancakes, and something you couldn’t quite put your finger on – something sweet. Making your way to the kitchen, you found your husband near the stove, a white apron wrapped around his body (most likely the one you’d gifted him a few years ago, the one with the Kiss the Cook print).
As your eyes roamed around the kitchen, they fell on the big bouquet of flowers sitting on top of the kitchen table, and the box of chocolates next to it. You cringed. Was he trying to bribe you? And then you examined said flowers and chocolate closer.
The flowers were the same as the ones you wore on your wedding bouquet. An unwilling smile made its way to your lips as you approached the delicate flowers and took in their scent. Fresh and as lovely as you remembered, the colourful flowers brought back memories of the happiest day of your life.
The chocolate box next to them was the same brand as the chocolates Aaron usually got for you whenever he was away on cases since they weren’t available in your state.
When had he gotten these?
“Good morning beautiful,” your husband said, turning to you and placing a plate full of pancakes on the table. He gave you a sheepish smile and leaned against the counter. “I hope you slept well.”
“I did,” you nodded, “What is all this?”
“My way of apologizing.” Aaron placed a glass of orange juice in front of your plate, as well as different jams and ingredients you could have your pancakes with. He had sliced bananas, butter, cheese and ham, jams, even strawberries. He’d really thought this through. “I behaved like an animal last night, and I want to make it up to you. I’m sorry, darling. I really am.”
You hummed and sat down. Fuck, those pancakes did smell good. Really good. You missed having Aaron cook for you. You could do it fine on your own, sure, but whenever he did it for you, it just filled your heart with immense warmth, because it just went to show just how much he loved you. How much he loved caring for you.
“You really hurt me last night, Aaron. You squeezed my wrist – you hurt me; do you understand?” You hoped your voice would convey just how angry you were with him. Not only had he looked through your phone and taken it from you, but he’d also squeezed your wrist and yelled. Aaron had once promised never to raise his voice or hand at you, and yesterday, he’d broken both those promises. “I don’t know if I can forgive you.”
Aaron’s eye twitched. Can’t forgive him? No. Impossible. Undoable. You had to forgive him. You were his wife. His to protect, his to love, his to own. Still. He kept calm. He took a deep breath and knelt next do you, hands resting on your legs.
“I’ll do whatever it takes to remedy what I did. In fact,” Aaron leaned back and grabbed something off one of the chairs, giving it to you right away. At first you were sceptical. Was he trying to buy you? He should know this was not how relationships work. Sure, he was wealthy, but it didn’t mean he could fix everything wrong with your relationship just by buying you something –
“I thought it would look lovely on you when we went out today.” Aaron spoke as you lifted the piece of fabric off the paper back. It was a lovely yellow dress, that you figured would reach below your knees. The fabric was soft, and it took everything in you not to rub it against your face – hell, it felt like heaven. And it was very pretty too, with little flower details that resembled a watercolour painting covering the dress. It was beautiful. “I thought we could go out today. You mentioned wanting to go to the market near the square? I can start making amends by taking you there, by showing you off like you deserve to be shown off. I don’t want to keep you captive here, sweetheart. I’m so sorry for the way I behaved. I promise, it’ll never happen again.”
You were speechless. Aaron was taking you out.
Shit. You hadn’t gone out since that little secret outing of yours. And as far as he was concerned, you hadn’t gone out in months. Was this it? Was your husband finally seeing how wrong his ways were? Was he finally changing?
“I’ve been so unfair, locking you up here, darling.” He reached out to touch your face, and you willingly let him. “All I wanted was to protect you, and I ended up hurting you. I hope this shows you just how much I love you, and how much I regret my past actions.”
You let his words sink in.
You knew letting you go out was Aaron’s biggest fears. He wanted nothing bad to happen to you, was far too scared that you would get hurt.
And now, he was letting go of his own fears. He was swallowing his pride and doubts and apprehensions because he wanted to apologise. Because he wanted to prove to you that he was sorry and that he did care about you and never wanted to hurt you. He was willing to break his number one rule for you.
And was there a greater display of affection?
“You really hurt me, Aaron…” you repeated, unconsciously rubbing at your wrists. Aaron noticed it immediately – didn’t take a profiler to do that and covered your hands with his own.
“I know. I will never forgive myself for that. But I’ll work until the end of my days to get you to do it. I love you, honey. The last thing I do is to hurt you. All I care about is your happiness.”
You looked away, bottom lip in between your teeth. A whole day out. Aaron wanted to go out. You’d finally leave the house (again). With him. You’d have fun. You’d enjoy yourself. You’d wear a nice dress and spend the day with your lovely husband.
Was there anything more perfect than that?
“Where are we going?”
“Anywhere you want, darling. I’ll take you out wherever you want. You can plan our whole day to your heart’s desire.”
A smile made its way to your lips. Not only were you getting to go out with your husband, but you were also permitted to plan it any way you want. And that was absolutely lovely. Your husband, the control-freak, the man obsessed with being on top of things, the one who freaked out whenever things got out of hand, was relishing control.
To you.
You smiled widely and wrapped your arms around Aaron’s neck, pulling him in for a tight hug. He reciprocated, of course, letting out a sigh of relief. You were back. You’d gone back to him. Just how he had wanted you to.
You buried your face in his neck, murmuring sweet “I love yous” and “Thank yous” that he responded to with a few kisses to your head and cheeks.
If allowing you to go out with him for a day was what took for you to forgive him, he’d do it. It was crushing him, of course, knowing that you’d be outside, for all to see. Knowing that anyone could easily hurt you made something turn and churn inside Aaron’s stomach, but he said nothing. He was willing to sacrifice one day for the sake of your marriage. After all, he’d be there next to you. He was a trained FBI Agent, for crying out loud. If he couldn’t protect you, what kind of man would that make him out to be?
No, he thought, it is extremely necessary.
“I love you, Aaron,” You whispered against his skin, feeling safe in his warm embrace. Last night had clearly been a mistake. He was angry, he was jealous, he was insecure, of course. You’d probably feel that way too if you found out he was calling other women past your bedtime, wouldn’t you? He just didn’t know what to do with his anger and got too passionate that’s it.
These were the words you told yourself as you smiled and hugged the man before you. The man that very much resembled the one you fell in love with, the sweet Aaron who’d promised to love and cherish you through thick and thin. Last night had been a small bump on the road, that’s it. Every marriage has a few every now and then. If you could push past this, it meant that your marriage would only get stronger and stronger as the years went by.
“I love you too, sweetheart,” Aaron replied, cupping your face to get a good look at you. His eyes roamed across your features, resting on the eyes he sought whenever he needed comfort, on the eyelashes he so often found himself swooning at whenever you batted them softly, on the lovely cheeks he loved to hold after a rough day, on the lips that tasted like home any time he pressed them against his.
Swallowing his pride and fears would be worth it to get your forgiveness.
You sat up straight once more and dug into your breakfast. As always, it was fantastic. Aaron was a great cook – and although you did most of the cooking because of his busy schedule, having him cook for you was something you loved.
“Alright, you think about what we’re going to do, sweetheart,” Aaron said as he stood up and kissed the top of your head. “I’m going to take a shower.”
You nodded enthusiastically and smiled to yourself, going through all the things you’d like to do today. There were a few places you wanted to visit, some activities you wanted to do, and you had to choose them carefully. Who knew the next time Aaron would let you go out? After a few minutes, you had a nice list on a sheet of paper beside you, and were brimming with excitement.
It was going to be the best day ever.
And to your credit, it really was.
You hadn’t been this happy in ages.
All thanks to Aaron.
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Your anniversary was quickly approaching.
Well, “quickly” was an understatement.
It was in two days, and you were so excited you could combust. After all, it was the anniversary of the happiest day in your life. The day you tied the knot with Aaron, the day you promised you’d be his, and him yours, the day where you swore to him a life of love, loyalty, and companionship.
Why wouldn’t you want to celebrate that?
You’d spent the entire day on your living room, papers and notebooks spread out on the couch and the coffee table before you, as well as some pencils and pens. You needed to plan this out perfectly. You were thinking about taking Aaron out to his favourite restaurant. Granted, it’d meant he would have to let you go out, but you figured he wouldn’t be able to say no in such a happy day.
You’d planned his gifts too – a bottle of wine, one that he had mentioned drinking a few years ago before you’d met and loved (thank Rossi for helping you find that one out), a new watch with your initials engraved inside (thank heavens you’d placed the order before Aaron took away your phone), and you had a lovely, lovely lingerie piece hidden away in your closet that you couldn’t wait for him to get a look at. It was going to be the perfect night; you were sure of it.
Aaron’s team had been taking workload off his desk as they promised, which meant your husband had been coming home to you earlier and earlier. Not only it was great for you, who missed him terribly, but also fantastic for him. Heavens knew how much Aaron needed to get some rest and sleep. These past few days, the bags under his eyes seemed to have disappeared and he wasn’t constantly exhausted. So, all your hard work had been paying off.
You just needed your anniversary to work out as well as everything else had.
As soon as the click of the door’s lock reached your ears, you scrambled to put away your things, not wanting to ruin the surprised you’d so thoroughly planned. Sure, Aaron knew about the wine, but he had no idea about the watch, the plans, and the flimsy piece of fabric you were sure he’d love.
“Hello, darling,” you greeted him as usual, turning around and offering him a smile. “How was work?”
But the sight before you sent chills down your spine, as opposed to bring you comfort.
Aaron was standing by the doorstep, eyes fixed on the ground below him. His jaw was tightened, and you could make out how white his knuckles were as he held onto his briefcase. He looked distressed, and it worried you.
“Darling?” You asked, carefully placing your notebooks under a pillow, and standing up. “Is everything okay?” You slowly moved around the couch to take his briefcase and his jacket, as you sometimes did when he was particularly tired – he usually liked it whenever you took care of him.
However, it was impossible to pry the briefcase away from his iron grip. You hummed and looked at him, trying to, for once, be the profiler. Must’ve been a rough case. You knew how gruesome some of them could be, and how Aaron preferred to hug you close sometimes instead of speaking about what tormented him. Actions spoke louder than words, you supposed.
“Rough day?”
He did not reply, choosing to keep staring at the floor.
“Darling, I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong,” you said, hand coming up cup his cheek. You rubbed your thumb over his jaw a few times, hoping to soothe him. It didn’t work – if anything, you felt his body tense up even more. “Aaron, I can’t read your mind. You don’t need to tell me all the details, but please say something. You’re worrying me.”
When he looked up and his eyes met yours, you nearly winced.
He looked like shit.
And that itself would be an understatement. His eyes were bloodshot, the eyebags you’d worked so hard to help remove were back and in full glory, his cheeks seemed hollowed, and his hair was messy, as if he’d ran his hands through it multiple times.
“Oh, honey…” you mumbled, hugging him without any further words. Whatever he’d gone through that day must have been ghastly because you were quite sure you’d never seen your husband like this.
And you were going to do everything in your power to help him out.
“How about you take a warm shower, okay?” You asked, placing a kiss on his jaw, hands rubbing circles on his back. “Wash the day off you, relax a bit. Dinner is in the oven, so it’s nearly ready. We can eat and then you can talk. Or not. Whatever you feel is best.” You murmured, burying your face in his neck. Some of the tension seemed to leave Aaron’s body, which you considered a small victory.
Wordlessly, Aaron kissed the top of your head, pried his body away from yours and moved to your bedroom. He was acting strange no doubt, but you knew he’d feel instantly better after a hot shower and some nice homemade food. You’d make sure to restore your husband’s spirits – after all, that’s what you promised. Good and bad. Sickness and health. Highs and lows.
You did good on your word and finished up dinner, taking it out of the oven and plating it up. You wondered what could possibly have your husband so shook up. Sure, he’d come before tired and exhausted, and had once or twice cried in your arms while you stroked his hair and held him tightly, but today? Today he just looked angry. And somewhat empty. Hell, he hadn’t even said “hello” or called you gorgeous. Something was up and you were going to get to the bottom of it.
When Aaron came out, his lips were pressed into a thin line. He looked better than a few minutes before, though. Surely the warm water had helped him relax a bit. Now, onto the cooking. Aaron loved your cooking. As mentioned before, he loved anything you did to take care of him.
So, you pulled up his chair and pressed a kiss on the top of his head while you fetched two glasses and poured the two of you some wine. Usually you’d drink water, but with the day you were sure Aaron had, some wine would be the perfect way to decompress. Aaron sat down, and while he looked better, clean, and wearing comfortable clothes, you still felt like his mood was dark. He refused to meet your eye, and his expression was blank.
You knew you had to tread carefully. One wrong move, and Aaron would shut up, hide, refuse to speak. No, you needed to slowly coax him out of your shell, slowly bring him to the space he knew he was safe in, the space he knew he could talk freely in.
“I had such a busy day today,” you started, cutting your food, and placing a forkful inside your mouth. You carefully watched the man before you, and smiled once he began eating. Good. He was eating – that meant whatever had happened today was salvageable. “I woke up, and I guess we must’ve had a pretty windy night, because some of the flowers I’d planted last week were ruined. Took me about two hours to fix everything up, and even then, I think we’ll have to order some more.”
Ah, right. Aaron had taken your phone from you, but he still allowed you to keep your computer. At first you thought it was a bit contradictory, letting you keep something you could still access people and websites with. But those questions were quickly answered when you figured out the only few websites you could access were store ones. He was clear about this; you only needed the internet to buy useful things. Food. Groceries. He’d even been nice enough (his words) to let you access a lingerie store. But other than that, there was nothing else you could do. You had no access to social media, and while he’d granted you a few entertainment websites and services, you could not comment anywhere nor interact with other people.
“Then I made a really nice omelette for lunch because I wasn’t really that hungry – that reminds me, we need to get eggs – and in the afternoon I finally managed to clear that one level we’ve been trying to play for days now,” you chuckled at the memory of Aaron picking up your controller, brows furrowed as he failed to clear the level you were so desperately trying to clear on your new game.
“And I tried something different with dinner – I’m using a different tomato sauce, so you’ve gotta let me know what you think. In my opinion, it’s far too sweet, but maybe you’ll think differently.”
Nothing. You got nothing out of him except for a few hums and nods. Shit. Work really must’ve been terrible today.
Well, time to pull out the big guns, your biggest effort. He wouldn’t possibly be able to stay silent after this one – not when it was such a happy topic, one you knew he too was excited for.
“You know, our anniversary is just a few days away,” you said, unable to hide the smile that spread across your lips. You couldn’t help it – Aaron made you happy. Your marriage made you happy. How were you expected not to cry when talking about a day filled with happiness and joy and the promise of endless love? “I have a few surprises for you already, but I was wondering if you had any plans of your own?
This seemed to get his attention, as he finally looked at you. and you congratulated yourself for knowing your husband so well.
“Plans?” He spoke for the first time that evening, not putting down his cutlery.
“You know, plans. I thought it would be nice if we went out, you know. It could be something simple, we’d go out for dinner and come home right away.” You knew Aaron had let you go out a while ago, and you didn’t want to push your luck nor his patience – but at the same time, you thought he was finally opening up to the idea that you’d be fine if you stepped outside of your home once in a while. He’d agreed to it once, why couldn’t he do it again? And for an extremely special occasion.
“How about we talk about what you did a couple weeks ago first?” He asked, voice cutting through the kitchen like ice. This took you aback. What was he talking about? And why was he interrupting your talk of anniversary plans to bring that up?
“What are you talking about?” You asked, putting down your fork and your glass. Your eyebrows scrunched in confusion, and an unsettling fear pooled in your stomach. Aaron had an incredible poker face, you knew this by the way his teammates spoke about him during interrogations, or how he never let his emotions show on his face.
But right now, the mask seemed to be cracking.
His jaw was set, and you could see the hint of a vein in his neck. His deep dark eyes bore into yours uncomfortably, and you shifted in your seat.
“I’m talking about how you sneaked out of the house a couple of weeks ago.”
You felt your stomach drop.
He knew. He knew you’d gotten out of the house.
Fuck.
How? No one had seen you – you’d made sure of that. None of your neighbours were there, and you’d worn a large hoodie and a pair of sunglasses, meaning you were kind of
Aaron’s voice was now rising, but he did not sound angry. He sounded awfully calm, like he was trying to keep everything under control. It wasn’t working – you were freaking the fuck out and were sure so was he.
“I didn’t go out, Aaron,” you said, doing your best to keep your voice from quivering. Was he just guessing? Maybe you could save this. “I never went out – I always stay home just like you tell me to.”
Wrong move.
“Don’t lie to me.” He banged his fist on the table, making you jump slightly. “Don’t lie to me,” he repeated, this time in a huskier tone. Usually, you’d get butterflies in your stomach whenever he spoke like this. Today, you felt a shiver run down your spine.
“Aaron,” you started, softly, “I’m sorry I did that, but you have to understand I’d been inside the house for about two months, I was just tired – “
“Tired?” Aaron retorted, raising an eyebrow. “Tired of what, exactly? Of staying home and doing nothing? Of reading your books and taking care of your flowers, while I’m the one out there, risking my life every single day, working overtime more times than I can count?”
“I stay home because you tell me to, not because I want to!” you exclaimed, putting down your fork and knife. You were fighting the tears in your eyes not to roll down your cheeks. The last thing you wanted right now was start crying – not when Aaron was acting to strangely, and you feared he was getting angrier by the second. You seemed to be doing quite a lot recently – holding back your tears. And you didn’t like it one bit. “And you don’t have to risk your life like that, you don’t have to work as much as you do. I’ve told you Aaron, you should take a break, maybe work less hours, focus on your health – “
“I’ve given you everything, haven’t I?” Aaron stood up, making his way to the living room. It didn’t take long, since the kitchen space was open, and he took long strides. “I’ve given you my love, my affection, all of my devotion, I’ve given you everything you could’ve possibly asked for, and only asked for one thing in return. Loyalty. Honesty. That you stay here and never leave, and you can’t even do that.”
You followed your husband right after, staying a few feet away from him as he paced back and forth, clenching his fists beside him.
“You can’t keep me here forever, Aaron, I need to go out.” You cried out once again, trying to make him see reason. Did he truly believe his reasoning to be correct? “I – I just – It’s not right! I can’t stay locked up forever!”
“You can, and you will,” he muttered through gritted teeth, rubbing his forehead in exasperation. “I’m your husband, I know what’s best for you, and I’m telling you it’s best if you stay home.”
“I’m not your prisoner, Aaron!” You threw your hands up, desperate. Was there anything you could say to make him realise just how wrong keeping you locked up at home was? “I just needed some fresh air. I felt like I was suffocating here!”
But your words, instead of soothing, seemed to have the opposite effect. Aaron’s breathing became more laboured and his eyes darkened.
“Suffocating? You want fresh air, go to the garden.” He scoffed, “You have everything you need right here! What more could you possibly want?”
You were becoming angrier at this point.
“It’s not about me wanting things, Aaron, it’s about freedom. You can’t keep me here forever!”
Then, a loud slam echoed throughout the room as Aaron punched the wall nearest to him, leaving an ugly dent in the stone. You flinched back, eyes widening with fear – Aaron had never been this violent. He’d gripped you too tightly once, but you’d never seen a display quite like this. It wasn’t like him, not at all. Hell, you weren’t even sure you knew this man, because the Aaron you loved most certainly did not act like this. Once upon a time, the man you married would have never been this violent in front of you. Once upon a time, he would’ve been understanding and talked to you about this instead of getting angry and letting his anger out in unhealthy ways.
“You don’t get to decide that!” He bellowed, “I do what’s best for you!”
Still, you couldn’t back off now. Your anger had subsided for the most part, now replaced with dread, but there was still a spark inside of you that made you not want to give up just yet. After all, you did not deserve this, now did you? Surely this type of behaviour wasn’t normal. Was it?
“This isn’t love, Aaron.” Your voice was shaking far too much, as was your whole body. “This is control. I’m your wife, I’m not your prisoner.”
Aaron turned to face you and in two steps, was towering over you like a brick wall. You took a few steps back instinctively, fearing the way he looked at you, with so much hatred and hostility in your eyes, you thought his gaze alone could turn you to a pile of ashes.
For the first time in your life, you recognised what you felt.
You were scared of your husband.
It was the first time you admitted it to yourself, and the realisation that you feared the one person whom you used to love and trust the most in the whole entire world was gutting. Because if you lost Aaron, you had no one else. He’d isolated you from your friends, from your family, and made himself a part of your every waking moment, consuming your thoughts and your actions.
“Don’t you dare speak to me like that.” He hissed.
You were scared for your life. You’d never seen Aaron like this, and it scared you to death. Still, you decided to take hold of whatever fight you still had in you. Because no matter what, you still loved the man before you. And if he loved you as he claimed he did, he would listen, he would understand, he would apologise and you could go back to your life together, like nothing had ever happened.
Well, maybe some counselling, but you were sure you could go back to your life together.
After all, you didn’t know what would become of your life without Aaron. He was all you’d learn to know, and without him, you’d be lost.
“I’m not afraid of you, Aaron.” A lie. “I just want my life back.” Where did you get all this courage from?
“What life?”
“The life we had! I can’t do this anymore,” Tears were streaming down your cheeks as you, for once, truly spoke whatever it was your heart desired. “I won’t stay locked up here like some prisoner in a tower, I want to go out, I want to do things my own way! I hate living like this! You don’t love me anymore; you just want to control me! And I’m done! You can’t do that – “
“You think you can just walk away from me?!”
Your little speech was interrupted, and before you knew it, you were on the floor, cheek stinging like crazy. When you brought your hands to your cheek, your lip, your chin – that’s when you saw it. The blood. Warm and gooey, running down your nose to your lips and dripping on the floor below you.
And then it dawned upon you.
Aaron had hit you.
Looking up at him, you noticed how he was clutching his hand, breathing heavily.
“Aaron?” you breathed out, hands now covered in blood, your cheek and nose hurting like hell. You knew he was strong. You used to love how strong he was. How he could drive creeps away from you with a single stare or a shove, how he could pick you up effortlessly, making you giggle like a lovesick teenager, how he could manhandle you so easily, you felt like you were melting. His strength used to be something good, something he used to protect you or give you pleasure.
Right now, he’d used it to cause you pain.
Once his eyes landed on you, they softened, and he shook his head slightly. His mind was going a mile per hour, and he couldn’t just believe what he’d done. Neither could you.
“Honey, I – “ he trailed off, the words dying on his tongue. He took some tentative steps towards you, but you scurried away, eager to get the hell away from him.
“Don’t.” You muttered, one hand still under your nose, trying to stop the blood from rushing down your face, and failing miserably. It didn’t seem to stop. How could he do this? How could the love of your life, the man you loved and cherished more than anything, do this to you? Why would he do it? Aaron had promised to love and cherish you forever. He promised to be patient and kind and sweet, and he swore he would never hurt you.
And lately, that’s all he’d been doing.
Was this the point of no return?
Were you too beyond repair?
Aaron just stared at you, eyes wide in fear and despair – but fear of what? He wasn’t the one on the floor, he was the one towering over you, with much more strength that you would ever be able to muster. He was the trained FBI agent, the one who could pin you to the ground and never let you go, the one who could hurt you with just one hand and never even leave a mark.
And you were married to him.
You were completely at Aaron’s mercy.
Instead of screaming or throwing something, anything at him, or running away, you did what you’d been meaning to do for a while. You let go. You cried – sobbed even – uncontrollably.
What had your life come to?
You had a nice career. You loved your job. You loved waking up and doing what made you happy and felt like you had a purpose in life. Then you’d met Aaron, and he’d swept you off your feet, and you were incredulous because how could it all get so much better? How could you get both the job and the man? How had you gotten so extremely lucky?
The answer was you couldn’t. You couldn’t get both the job and the man, because Aaron sat you down and told you about his past. You’d hurt for him. Very much. Knowing he had lost both his wife and son to a sadistic man who took pleasure in hurting others had made you hold him tightly night after night after night and promise you wouldn’t go anywhere.
That’s when he made you promise you wouldn’t go anywhere.
It started out rather innocent.
“You could stay home,” he mumbled against your neck, pressing kisses on the soft skin below your ear as you cooked dinner. “I make enough money for the both of us. I can take care of you.”
You’d chuckled, shaking your head.
“I love my job, Aaron. I really do. And I like working, so it’s fine. But you’re sweet to even consider that.”
“You shouldn’t have to work, though,” he pressed on. “I could take care of you.”
You’d said no the first few times, but eventually relented. You knew it would put Aaron at ease, and you thought he was worth it. Your relationship was worth it.
Your wedding day was the happiest of your life, and your honeymoon was spent with love and affection and you often looked back upon those memories whenever you felt down.
And now, you cried over them.
You cried because those days were gone. You no longer had the job that fulfilled you so much, you no longer had the husband who cared for you so earnestly you thought you didn’t deserve him, and not even the memories of your honeymoon made you happy – they just made you resent whatever your life had become. Trapped inside your own home, terrified of your husband.
What the hell had happened?
“Darling, I’m so sorry…” Aaron crouched down next to you, and this time, you made no efforts to move. You were too tired, too heartbroken to do something other than cry and mourn what you thought was your current life. Did Aaron even love you anymore? Did you want to leave him, or did you just want this misery to stop? And even if you did leave him, what was to become of you? Your bank accounts belonged to him – he’d convinced you it was better, since you were married and working towards a future together – you’d lost all contact with your friends after Aaron convinced you it was for the best and cut all ties with your family.
“I just want our old life back,” you sobbed, hiding your face in your hands.
You didn’t realise Aaron’s arms were wrapped tightly around you until he pressed you against his chest. It was comforting, to be in his arms, but you also felt like you were suffocating, like once you gave up, he’d consume you whole and you would never belong to anyone else but him – not even yourself.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I just…” Aaron ran his fingers through your hair, making sure all his touch was focused on bringing you comfort. His touch was both feather-like and crushing at the same time, and you thought the combination was fitting, considering your last couple of weeks. You also thought it would kill you, how sweetly he was holding you, but how his iron grip would not let you go. Perhaps it was already doing it. Perhaps you were already dead. Maybe that’s why you didn’t want to fight. “I can’t bear the thought of something happening to you. You mean everything to me.”
You wanted to fight. You wanted to scream and yell and push him away and get the hell out of that house. You wanted this madness to be over. You wanted your independence back, your freedom, you wanted to go out and live a life of your own instead of living his.
But you were so tired.
Tired of fighting and arguing when you knew he wouldn’t listen. Tired of witnessing displays of violence that had increased over the weeks. Tired of being so miserable.
Was it your fault? Was it your own doing that you were so unhappy in your life?
“I can’t lose you…” Aaron kept on speaking, stroking your hair and holding you as if you were a precious jewel he wanted to protect – or a most wanted criminal he could not let escape. “I can’t stand to lose someone I love, not again… Please forgive me…”
Perhaps if you hadn’t gone out, none of this would’ve happened.
Maybe Aaron was right.
He did give you everything you could ever want, didn’t you? You asked for a book, and there it was days later. You weren’t one for material things, but if you expressed a desire for a pair of shoes or some jewellery, he’d buy that for you in a heartbeat.
“You mean everything to me, darling, you really do…”
Weakly, you moved your arms around your husband, fully embracing him. You sobbed loudly, your whole body shaking, wrapped tightly in his. It felt like home, it felt like where you were meant to be, but it also felt like prison.
“I’m so unhappy, Aaron… I can’t do this anymore…” you shook your head, burying your face in his chest, taking in his scent, trying to ground yourself. “I feel like I have nothing to live for. Can’t you understand it? I have nothing, all day, every day. And when you’re gone away on cases, I’m so lonely.”
Suddenly, an idea went off in Aaron’s head.
Of course. How come he hadn’t thought of it yet?
“I can’t do this anymore, Aaron, I’m so lonely and I feel trapped… If you truly love me, you’ll understand, won’t you?” How you were still fighting, you had no idea. What were you asking of him? Freedom? A bit of leeway? For him to put you out of your misery?
“Maybe… maybe what you need is something to keep you grounded,” he muttered, pulling back slightly to look you in the eye. He saw the way your eyebrows scrunched together and caressed your cheek with his hand. Instinctively, you leaned into it and Aaron smiled. He still had that effect on you.
“A baby.”
You stilled in his arms.
A what?
“Someone to love and take care of,” he continued, rubbing circles on your skin with his thumb. “It’ll give you a sense of purpose. You won’t be lonely anymore, and you’ll never feel the need to leave again.”
How it had taken so long for Aaron to realise this, he had no clue. You’d talked about kids, sure, but it was always a “future you” kind of thing. Right now, you were enjoying your life together, and children weren’t in the picture.
But as he pictured you, round and swollen with his child, he felt a tug in his heart and a strain in his pants. Yes. A child. You’d carry on his legacy and have a sense of fulfilment as you loved and cared for his child. And you would not be able to leave, since you’d be too much of a good mother to abandon your baby. And you wouldn’t be too cruel as to take the baby from their father.
It was exactly what you two needed – a baby, to cure your relationship, to heal what was so hurt and damaged right now. He could see it clear as day, you, lovingly caressing your pregnant belly as you sat in your garden, glowing more than the sun itself. He saw you smiling one of your most breathtaking smiles at him, reaching out for his hand so he could feel his son or daughter kick.
He could see you breastfeeding your baby in the living room, cooing at them and caressing their chubby cheeks. He could see you putting your child to sleep with so much adoration, it’d make his heart burst as he watched from the doorway.
Yes.
A baby, a little child with his eyes and your smile, or your nose and his chin.
It was everything you needed.
You still clung to Aaron, holding him tightly as if he were a lifeline. You looked into his eyes and knew exactly what you were picturing, saw exactly what he saw.
And for once, you were too tired to argue. Too afraid.
Your life did not belong to you anymore – it was Aaron’s, to mold and shape and do whatever he wanted with it. Not even your own body was yours anymore – it was now something for him to possess and bend and twist as he desired. He’d give you his child and you’d carry it because that was the only thing you could do. You did not belong to yourself anymore.
And as Aaron looked at you, eyes devoid of any spark, of any spirit, he caressed your cheek and kissed your forehead.
“Trust me, darling,” he whispered against your face. “Everything I do is for you. I love you more than anything.”
You nodded.
You were completely, utterly, irrevocably his.
“You just need to see that.”
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A/N: And that's it!!! I really hope you guys have enjoyed it!
Again, I just really wanted to explore a scenario where Aaron was this extremely posessive and abusive partner - I don't really know why but it was stuck in my head and I had to write it down. Oops. Sorry.
I also tried something different with the layout - hopefully it looks fun! I want it to be easier to tell the Pairing, the Word Counts, the Warnings and the Author's Note from each other, so hopefully this will help make it look less bulky lol.
Anyway, I really hope you guys enjoyed it!
Have a wonderful day ahead, everyone! <3
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kaledya · 12 days
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Hello again !
Oh okay I understand!
Thank you for the explanation! Things make sense in that type it follow more the show seasons development. I forgot that in your SS AU Luci and Charlie are in a bad place. It will help (Not me panicking because Constantine come sooner and I always plan a VERY slow burn romance between him and Lolicia. Ahhh. So excited. Anyway) The more important is that Lucifer and Serenity coming later. Heaven arc last. I get it !
I will take care of your advices 🌸 So greatest showman mini arc incoming let's go!
Ps : glad you like my drawings!🌸 Thank you even if its not the best. Promise I will try to not butcher Constantine and Serenity fanarts ahah
Have a nice day! -marquisev
Hİ!
And I'm really glad to know that I could explain it properly! I hope I could help!
And yes, they are on bad terms right now, generally because Lucifer can't put his pride aside and admitted his mistake, or because he thinks knew what was best for Charlie and saying her plan is Unreasonable and far from reality .He doesn't even let Charlie explain herself and is upset about the fight they had the last time they met. Charlie thinks,
"He won't listen to me anyway, why am I trying any harder?"
Lucifer, on the other hand, cannot go to his daughter and admit that she is wrong, again because of his pride.
(This idea is seriously a wip, I didn't think of that arc in detail ) but when Lucifer comes to the hotel, Alastor criticizes him as a father.(Because by this time, Alastor has been spending a lot of time with Charlie, and they even fight back to back at one point. He can understand Charlie's relationship with Lucifer from her behavior.)
Extra: (Their current reaction is not the same as in this post, I drew this post before I started writing my AU, Alastor does not try to make fun of Constantine in any way (he knows what will happen if he does, he logically does not want to push his luck).)
And after this encounter and some events in between And after a long and touching conversation between Lucifer and Charlie, Their relationship is getting better. In my mind, this scene reminds me of the scene between Joel and Ellie in Last of Us 2.
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But they still love each other sincerely. Lucifer was in a bad mood due to Lilith's disappearance and this widened the gap between them.But if they sit down and talk, they won't have much of a problem with time.
OH MY GOD REALLY?? I'm seriously already excited about how you're going to write their interactions! And I have full confidence that you will write a great slow burn romance. I can't wait to see their dynamics.
And yes, Constantine arrives at a time similar to when Lucifer arrives in the series.
Yes!, but it's not too early, I don't have an exact timeline, but seriously important events are happening at the hotel, maybe Angel is getting rid of Val.After the people in the hotel really start to trust each other and show their character development.
The reason I think this is because Charlie invited her brother over to show him her progress.For this, there was a need for arcs in which the team would experience character development.
Yes, Serenity comes to the hotel after the hotel's case with the Vees and after a while, at the right time, she reveals her identity to Alastor .Lucifer arrives shortly after this event.After this there is a heaven arc and the planning is this after this event it's completely blank page, I really don't know what will happen next.
And as I said before, you don't have to follow what I wrote, be free. This is your story.
And believe me, I love your drawing style, I think you draw very well.
And I'm really excited for the next arc!
By the way, I read the latest episodes. It was very nice to read Husk and Lolicia's interactions and I find Charlie's activity very creative!
And Lolicia's new outfit has a really interesting and creative design I love it! And reading that you were inspired by Baldurs Gate 3 really surprised me and brought back memories.I take that outfit in House of Hope too and after wearing it, Gale's comment made me laugh a lot😂
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faerytreealtars · 1 year
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☆•° How does your inner child view Current you? °•☆
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Hello my dears, I felt called to channel some letters from your inner children seeing as I have been working on my own inner child for the past few months, it felt only right to help all of you connect more with yours! So take a breath, clear your mind and pick whatever image speaks to your heart. Remember it is a general reading so only takes whatever resonates. Much love. Fae♡
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♡ Pile One ♡
{Cards: The hierophant, two of pentacles, nine of pentacles, five of pentacles, ace of wands & four of swords}
Dear Pile One,
I, Your inner child see you as someone I could have only dreamed of being, you have power and wisdom now than I could have ever imagined, and the way you balance & control that power is so inspiring! We really came from nothing, hard times, and challenges but now look at us prosper! Far more than little me could have ever dreamed of! so much choice & creativity flows to you and makes me so proud to be you, or at least a part of you! Even if you feel out of your element just remember to slow down & look at how far you (we) have come!
~Lot's of Love, Little You ♡
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♡ Pile Two ♡
{Cards: Five of Pentacles, page of wands, four of pentacles -reversed, The sun -Reversed, the tower and the hanging ones.}
Dear Current me.
I do not know how to start this letter, I do not know if you will even listen or care. I hope you will for I need you more than I have ever done. I do not know how to heal the hurts, only you do. Please don't neglect me anymore - It is so dark, so cold and I feel so confused. I am only little so why must my (our) heart hurt so? What was done to us was unjust but I do not want to linger on it any longer, there is a whole bright light for us. I can see it through the cracks but I am tired so I ask of you please don't hide away, can you be strong for us? I hope you can.
Your Ever-loving, little you ♡
(Note: While channeling your inner child I instantly felt drained of energy and cold, and it's a really hot day today so that tells me your inner child feels very neglected, I don't say this to make you feel bad. It's really easy to get busy and ignore the needs of your energy but seeing as I was near tears while writing your letter I urge you all to slow down and talk to your inner child, they really need you!)
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♡ Pile Three ♡
{Cards: seven of pentacles, eight of pentacles, two of wands, the world, the star & ten of swords}
Dear Pile Three,
Hi!! Letters are kind of stuffy, don't you think? So don't mind if this sounds more like a text message! But oh, wow! I think you're so cool, like we're really the best and I know I'm right! Oh I need to focus I've been told so yeah anyway, we've done so much! succeded in all my dreams and we are unstoppable, I say don't listen to the haters they don't know us, or our story, haven't seen how far we've come, the work we've put in, the swords we've pulled from our back. Keep dreaming new dreams and know I'm your biggest cheerleader (on a side note we would have been great cheerleaders) Fae says we must have run on sugar rushes exclusively but I'm just an energetic kid! Anyway, I've got nothing else to say except Bye!!
(Channeling your inner child energy was like riding a roller-coaster, It's not bad in fact I'm sure you must have been quite the comedian/character in your youth but I do hope your parents/carers are getting some well-needed rest now!!)
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I hope that you managed to find comfort, Inspiration, or a message that resonated with you out of the three piles, If not don't worry I'm sure you will receive a message in some other way. Much Love - Fae˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
TAROT DECK USED: Nicoletta Ceccoli Tarot
MOON POSITION: Full Moon - Strawberry Moon (100%)
DAY OF THE WEEK: Sunday - Sun elemental, today's energy is good for relaxation and spending time enjoying the great outdoors. Rising with the sun will give you energy and it's best to avoid doing anything too active or strenuous on the body. Clear your mind from all worries and focus on mindfulness. Lucky Colours: Gold and Burgundy
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