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bts-reveries · 3 years

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expect the unexpected | 17

You spent the previous night at your parent’s house while your dad stayed at the hospital with your mom. They wanted to make sure that everything was okay before they let her go. Your dad let you know that there’s food in the fridge and to eat when you get home.

You weren’t hungry so you decided to get some shut eye… until midnight when you were suddenly hungry and ate every leftovers your parents had.

Long story short, you came back to the hospital the following morning and you’re now in your mom’s hospital room, throwing up in the toilet.

“Are you okay hon?” Your dad asks, peeking his head into the bathroom.

“Ugh I think I ate too much last night,” you say, getting up from the bathroom floor.

“Are you sure that’s all? Nothing else?” Your dad asks you as you go over to the sink to rinse your mouth and wash your hands. “Do you want to get checked? We are in a hospital already,” he laughs.

“No, I think I’m fine. I’m just going to go lay down, I kind of feel light headed.”

“Okay sweetie, if you still aren’t feeling well by the time mom’s discharged, we’re going to get you checked next. Can’t be too safe. You probably caught something,” your dad says, walking to your mom’s side.

“What’s wrong?” Your mom asks you when you walk out of the bathroom. You shake your head, you didn’t want her to worry, she’s been through enough.

“Nothing, I just ate too much last night right before I went to sleep,” you answer, sitting down on the chair by her.

“Okay… I see.”

“Are you going to forget us again,” Soojin says as the four of them drive up to the school drop off. Jin scoffs.

“Yah, it was an accident,” Jin says, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll be working at our building today. So I won’t fall asleep and I will be able to pick you up on time.”

Soojin pouts, “I like it when Uncle Yeonjun takes us home..”

“And that’s why it isn’t happening anymore,” Jin says with wide eyes, turning his head back to look at her. “Daddy will be the one to pick you up until college. Okay?”

“Fine,” Soojin says with a small eye roll, her older brother laughs at her.

“Okay, I love you both, be good,” Jin says, unlocking the doors and waving his hand at the kids.

“Can you at least bring uncle Yeo--”

“Leeeeeeaaavee,” Jin says, pointing out the door, interrupting Soojin. His daughter huffs, crossing her arms over her chest as she gets down from the car.

“Bye dad, we love you,” Minseok says, speaking for both him and his sister. “Bye Han-Han,” he says, tickling Haneul’s chin, making him laugh.

“Okay Haneul, you’re going to work with me today,” Jin says, driving off as soon as his two oldest gets to their friends.

“No auntie Sohu and auntie Rin today?” Haneul asks, already pouting. Jin glances at him from the rearview mirror.

“Nope, not today. Maybe tomorrow okay? Daddy has a lot to do,” Jin tells him. “You’ll see uncle Kookie later though.”

“Uncle JaaayKaaay~” Haneul says it the same way that Jungkook does it, nose scrunch and everything.

“Yeah uncle JaaayKaaay,” Jin repeats.

“Okay, the first meeting is in ten minutes,” Yeonjun says, walking right alongside Jin. The two power walked to the nearest elevator. Haneul was running right behind them since his little legs couldn’t keep up.

“Daddyy,” Haneul whines, starting to cry. The two older men stop mid step, looking down at Haneul. Who is now kneeling down onto the floor and crying. Throwing a tantrum in the middle of the room.

Haneul begins to start screaming, heads are turning towards them three now.

“Aigoo,” Jin sighs, bending down to pick up his son. “What’s wrong?” If you were there, you would know it was because they weren’t giving him attention. I mean, I’d hate it if my two friends were walking ahead of me and leaving me behind, forgetting about me!

“You’re okay~” Jin says, bouncing Haneul in front of him. Hanuel screams in response, bending backwards. Jin smiles sheepishly and bows at the people who walk by, staring. “Shh shh,” he hushed. “He’s being so dramatic,” Jin says to Yeonjun.

“Umm sir, he is your son after all…” He replies.

“Are you feeling better?” Your dad asks you as you three get to their car. Your mom was finally getting discharged, so the three of you were leaving the hospital now.

“I think so,” you say, hopping in the back seat. “My stomach still hurts a bit though..” you say, rubbing your belly. “I shouldn’t have eaten so much, so late last night..”

“Maybe it’s your period honey,” your mom says, looking back at you from the passenger’s seat.

“You’re right,” you say, coming to the realization that you haven’t had your period yet. You take out your phone to check when the last time you had your period. You had an app for it, especially since you take birth control as well, you keep well track of your period. Although now that you think of it… you should’ve had it already this month.

“Dad, before we go home, can we stop by the store? I just need to grab something really quick.”

“Okay, moving on. As some of you know, I had a meeting yesterday with Mr. Lee,” Jin says, sitting in the boardroom and having a meeting with his fellow employees. “We’re good to go with our new building in Busan.” Everyone starts to clap and Haneul looks around the room confused, slowly starting to clap along. He was currently sitting on Yeonjun’s lap.

“With that said, a few of you will be going to Busan to scope out the new area where our building will be,” Jin says, scanning over the employees sitting around the table.

Haneul squirms out of Yeonjun’s hold, running to his dad.

“Are any of you interested in going?” Jin asks. “Or I can pick-- Haneul, later,” Jin says, whispering that last part as Haneul tries to climb onto his lap. Jin looks over to Yeonjun and gives him the look saying ‘get him please.’ Yeonjun immediately gets up and runs towards Jin, bending down to pick up Haneul.

“No!” Haneul yells, turning around to give Yeonjun a dirty look. Haneul turns back towards Jin and tries to climb onto his lap. “I only want daddy,” he says.

“I’m sorry everyone, he’s been a little clingy lately,” Jin says with a slight laugh, picking Haneul up and placing him on his lap. “Let’s continue, does anyone want to go?”

A few people raise their hand up, Yeonjun writes their name down.

“Perfect,” Jin says. “This will be next week, your transportation and hotel will all be paid for.” Haneul turns around and wraps his arms around Jin’s neck, standing on his lap.

“Haneul, can you sit down please,” Jin says, tapping his little butt. “Come on, daddy is working.”

“Noo,” Haneul whines, hugging Jin’s neck even tighter and leaning on him. Jin sighs.

“Okay, I think it’s time for a nap,” he says, looking over at Yeonjun. “I’m sorry everyone, we’re going to have to cut this meeting a bit short. I’ll follow up with you who volunteered to go to Busan later. By tonight you will get a message from me. For everyone else, thank you for your time, I’ll see you all later.”

Everyone says their thank you’s and gets up to leave the room. Jin sighs, rubbing Haneul’s back as he stands up from his chair.

“Go ahead and get some food to eat Yeonjun or whatever else you want to do, I’ll be up in my office. I’ll put Haneul down for a nap,” Jin says, bouncing side to side to help Haneul fall asleep.

“Okay, thank you sir. Would you like me to get anything for you two?” Yeonjun asks. Jin shakes his head.

“No, we're good for now, thank you.” With that, Yeonjun walks out and Jin stays a while in the boardroom to try and soothe Haneul.

“Haneul-ah~,” Jin says calmly. “We’re going to be here all day, please be good for daddy..”

You sat on the toilet (with the lid closed) waiting for the results.

Can this really be happening?

You just got back from the store and are now in your parent’s house. You told your parent’s that you were just going to get medicine, which you did, but you really went for one other thing.

*Dit. Dit. Dit.*

The three minutes were up and you were nervous to check.

What if…

“He’s sleeping so peacefully,” Jin says, standing over Haneul (who was asleep on the couch he had in his office).

“I can go pick up the kids again hyung,” Yeonjun says. He was standing next to Jin.

“No, I promised the kids I’ll be the one to pick them up today. Can you just watch him while I’m gone? I won’t take long and he should still be asleep by the time I come back,” Jin says, scratching his head. Yeonjun nods.

“Yeah, no problem hyung. I’ll watch him.”

“Okay, thank you. I’ll be back in like fifteen, twenty minutes.”

“Hey you remembered us,” Minseok jokes as he gets into the car.

“Of course I did,” Jin says.

“Where’s Haneul?” Soojin asks, looking at the empty car seat. “You forgot him! Mommy is going to be soo mad at you!” Jin laughs, looking back at them.

“I didn’t forget him, he’s sleeping in my office. He’s with uncle Yeonjun,” Jin tells her. Soojin’s eyes immediately light up at the sound of his name, making Jin roll his eyes. “Anyways, when we get there, we’re going to wake up Haneul and go eat something in the cafeteria. Then we have a shoot to go to, so we’ll be going to our other building.”

“Why do we have two buildings anyways,” Soojin asks, looking out of the window as Jin drives away from their school.

“One is our main location, that’s where my office is at and where all the office work takes place. Our other building is where all the studios are at for our clients to take photo or video shoots,” Jin explains.

“Can I have one of them when we’re bigger,” Soojin asks, kicking her feet against the back of the passenger’s seat.

“Sure princess. One for you, one for Minseok, and one for Haneul.”

“But that’s three, you only have two buildings,” Minseok says. “But I can share with Soojin or Haneul, I don’t mind.” Jin smiles as he hears what Minseok says, but by the look on his daughter’s face, Jin can see Soojin quirking up an eyebrow at her brother from the rear view mirror.

“Don’t worry, you two don’t need to share. We’re opening up another location soon, Haneul can have that one,” Jin tells them.

“Good, because I want my own building,” Soojin says, crossing her hands over her chest. Jin laughs. They really are polar opposites.

The three walk into Jin’s office and Soojin immediately runs to Yeonjun, who is now carrying Haneul.

“Is everything okay?” Jin asks as he hears his son crying, he walks over to his secretary, taking Haneul from him.

“He woke up and started crying when he noticed that you were gone, I tried my best to calm him down.”

“Aigoo, Haneul-ah, why are you being so clingy to daddy lately huh?” Jin says, pressing kisses to his cheek. Haneul lays his head onto Jin’s shoulder and calms down.

“I think you’re just going to have to carry him all day,” Yeonjun says.

“I think so too. I would use a baby carrier on him, but I think he’s too big for that now..”

“Haneul misses mommy that’s why,” Minseok says, rubbing his little brother’s back.

“Should we facetime mommy then?” Jin asks.

“Yes I miss mommy too!!” Soojin says, bouncing up and down.

“Okay okay, we’ll call mommy first and then we’ll go eat,” Jin says, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

It’s ringing and ringing

And ringing and ringing

And ringing

Still ringing

And no answer.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

expect the unexpected

♡ part seventeen: no answer ♡

pairings: ceo, dad!jin x interior designer, mom!reader

a/n: short but a lot👀

something to read while we wait for muster day 2!!💗💜♾🪐

taglist: @silentlyimpractical @jillianmarie @waddlebby @cecedrake2217 @ddofa @samros95 @sope-and-shine @joonjoonsmiles @codeinebelle @aianloveseven @Chamchamcham @princessjazzyjazz @notvantaes @casspirit0705 @ramyagovindraj @brinnalaine @ephyra1230 @betysotelo18 @thoughtfultaledreamer @salty-for-suga @cosmicdaylight @dreamcatcherjiah @kookoo-kachoo @justinetingball @josierosie @jayhope88 @butterflylion @hobiismyhopeu @momma-said-that-it-was-oke @ygbubs @catspancake @somewhereofftheglobe @strawberryforever25 @rjsmochii @prdshobi @beeeb05 @eatjeanjin @taekookcaneatme @Cheeely14 @kookietsukkie @anpanman-sonyeondan @glitteringcoffeefreak @chocobetterknot @alpaca1612 @ohmy-fandoms @liljooniecutie @Jikachoo @preciouschimine @fan-ati--c @Joondala @httpmuffin @dammit-jjk @jikooksgirl19

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shijas · 3 years

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HELLOOOOO ITAFUSHIKUGI IS SO CUTE. BYE IM SCREAMING,, omg share some of ur hcs ? 🥺

WOOOW YAY!! they defo toe the line between a full on relationship and qpr for me and i adore them!! some hcs:

these kids spend like 60% of their downtime napping!! megumi usually ends up in the middle because i live by thermodynamic sink megumi! nobara sleeps like a gremlin, in that she probably rolls around a lot and can end up kicking people (shameless projection i’m a horrible person to sleep next to), whereas yuji sleeps like the dead unless he’s super tired in which he will probably murmur under his breath. megumi thinks he has no sleeping habits but he definitely snores and/or wheezes at some part of his sleep cycle

i think its funny that they all had crushes on each other but didn’t realise it at all, like megumi and nobara both initially think i’m not gonna crush on yuji, it’s yuji for goodness sake and then nobara knocks on megumi’s door at midnight like you have to save me i have a crush on yuji and megumi is like oh my god you toooo????????? anyway this is all fine and stuff until nobara finds herself with a crush on megumi and she’s like wtf the tokyo air has ruined me and then by wild guess she realises yuji has a crush on megumi so now she’s playing double agent while she has a crush on BOTH of them and probably runs crying to maki like senpai,,,, put me out of my misery, meanwhile maki literally heard megumi and yuji dying over the fact they both called nobara cute out loud when she did something moderately evil to gojo in class. eventually they all figure it out and it’s a fun polypile

yuji does most of the cooking because he’s the most competent cook, if it’s a complaictsd enough dish that megumi helps, nobara gets stuck with dishwasher and dishes duty much to her chargin.... megumi usually helps her with that too tho so it’s never too bad! the only thing that yuji doesn’t usually cook is tea. nobara is the tea expert, saori taught nobara all the tips and tricks to the perfect cup of anything and especially after cold or rainy missions, her blends are super well appreciated. to round out the kitchen chores, megumi is in charge of the shopping list because he’ll actually take note of things that are running out before they run out and draft a list as time passes, while preparing coupons/checking for discounts,,, and because he probably had the best taste in snacks...

yuji definitely hits his hinted at growth spurt and just towers over everyone (gojo is so put out, where did his tiny cute student go ㅜㅜ) and his strength just seems to increase expontially. nobara and megumi weigh NOTHING to him, he abuses his new tall powers constantly, like he wasn’t already abusing them before. hugs already guaranteed that you’d be a few cms off the ground and now nobara literally shrieks at how high she’s lifted. megumi 100% doesn’t know how to behave around him too like one day he was using those 2cms to his advantage and tilting yuji’s head up slightly and now he’s literally walking into yuji’s chest in the mornings it’s surreal. yuji 1000% relishes in the beneath the lashes looks the other two send him but he goes horribly pink so it’s a double edged sword

yuji takes them to visit his grandfathers grave eventually but like there’s 1000% no angst, idk if any of yall have read csm but think of it like denji and power with aki just a bit more respectful. nobara is absolutely loosing it about going out to the countryside again even tho sendai is a pretty sizeable city; megumi feels kinda bad about the whole circumstances surrounding grandpa itadori’s death and so tries his best to be comforting and supportive only to bicker with nobara insistently by accident. yuji doesn’t mind tho, he didn’t want it to be a sombre event or anything and is pretty upbeat about, he probably makes a joke about how his grandpa didn’t expect him to gain bout a girlfriend AND boyfriend and how he was living double the high school experience. nobara and megumi probbaly promise to take care of yuji when in reality 80% time yuji is taking care of them and because they’re absurdly terrible at it

nobara and yuji definitely bond over self care stuff like face masks, nails, expensive bath stuff. megumi is rather impartial to it until they show him the wonders of self care tm. honestly he still wouldn’t go out of his way to do all the stuff they do without them but he can definitely appreciate how good nobara and yuji look in those animal print sheetmasks or the smell of yuji’s grapefruit conditioner and nobara’s rose water toner or whatever idk i’m bad at self care tooo sjsjsjjdjr

escape bunny shenanigans,,,,, megumi tries so hard to make the distinction that his shinigami are not pets and nobara and yuji do not listen they’ll be like megumi,,, bunny,,, and suddenly the room is full of bunnies who are just waiting for good pets and grapes or whatever fruit they’ve bought in surplus to feed the bunnies. the remaining divine dog definitely lives on the end of whoever’s bed they’re sleeping in that week, if gojo asks they’ll be like megumi is training his stamina and how much time he can keep his shingami around when in reality nobara has bought dog costumes and toys and yuji has like 9 different gourmet dog food recipes open on his phone

i think living together, even before swinging their relationships, comes with a certain number of boundaries they just kinda fall away and so eating off each other’s plates, drinking from the same bottle etc etc comes about pretty fast like megumi doesn’t like peppers cool nobara and yuji will happily eat them off his plate; oh there’s only one ramune left cool let’s split the bottle three ways you know what i’m saying? nobara is probably the first one to hit the clothing and skinship boundaries because she gives zero fucks like she’s walking around in her towel cuz she left her sheet mask in the fridge to get chilly and soothing and whatever and yuji sees her while doing dinner prep and she’s like what you never see a titty before? and he laughs so hard they just kinda forget about it. it’s super hot in summer and megumi is literally dying in just his shorts by the open door and nobara sees his stomach and is like is this a weather appropriate place to lay? and proceeds to belly flop ontology of him anyway. yuji and megumi deinftely have one of those hey, stop screaming it’s me moments in the shower. the boundaries blur and disappear and anything that needs to en addressed is and that’s that...

clearly... i have gotten carried away but yeah,,, them 🥰

#itafushikugi #or as i like to call it #nobara + silly boys #my hcs #the brainrot expands sigshdhjd #a lot of these again i’ve already mentioned or hinted at in my works where they’re all just friends cuz their relationship just strikes me #as like that you know? the seemless transition between strangers and friends and lovers #happy healthy teens falling in love #ofc you can read these totally platonic like most of my stuff actually since i am unable to fully commit to romance... it’s my poteintal aro #god this is so long i wrote four took a shower and ended up with four more #i just think they’re neat #this gucci!!

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the-bau-quinjet · 3 years

Text

I want to drive away with you

Chapter 12 of In Breakable Heaven!

Summary: The show from reader’s perspective.

Warnings: angst

Word count: ~2100

As you finish preparing for your mini-show in the dressing room, you can’t help but think about the voicemail you left for Spencer on your way to the venue.

“Hey Spence. I miss you, but you already know that. I’m doing a sort of mini show at 7 tonight. It would mean the world to me if you came… Look, I get it. You don’t want to be with me anymore, but I don’t want you to disappear from my life completely. Not when I need you now more than ever… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m not trying to guilt you into coming, I just really want you to be there. For the moral support. The rest of the team is coming, so you won’t be alone. That’s it I guess. Bye.”

Tears spring to your eyes as you remember what he said to you the night he left. Shaking your head to clear the memories, you focus on the positive. That’s what your therapist has been telling you to do anyway. So, you switch focus and think of your friends. You are so grateful for the rest of the BAU team coming to support you after everything that happened. You are not alone, no matter how much it feels like it sometimes.

With that reminder ringing in your ears, you get up to walk on stage as you hear the announcer introducing you. Taking a seat on the stool behind the lone mic center stage, you look into the audience. You know you shouldn’t look for him, but you can’t help it. Your eyes meet those of Derek, JJ, Emily, Penelope, and to your surprise, Hotch and Rossi. They had never come before. You give the group a small wave, choosing to ignore the lack of Boy Genius.

You finally bring the mic to your mouth and greet the crowd “How are y’all doing tonight?” The crowd cheers you on as you continue introducing the show you have planned. “Now, you might be expecting the usual, but I’m afraid I only have three songs for you tonight. Just trying to get back into the swing of things, ya know?” Your abduction had been all over the news, which is probably why the crowd feels bigger than normal. “I hope you enjoyed the earlier acts though!”

“The first song encompasses how I was feeling about a month ago. Before everything happened.” You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to erase the bad and remember the good. “It was the happiest I have ever been. I had a great group of friends, a job I loved, a hobby that helped me bring some of that joy to you guys, and… the most incredible boyfriend.” You purposefully ignore the shocked gasps from some your friends in the front row. If you met their eyes right now, they would be sure to figure everything out.

“Most of that is still true and for that I am incredibly grateful. Without further ado, here we go!” This song reminds you of everything you’ve lost rather than everything you still have, but it was the only one you could think to sing to truly encompass how happy you were a month ago.

The moon is high, like your friends were the night that we first met.

Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet. Now, I’ve read all of the books beside your bed.

You wave your hand in the air in a “that’s only sort of true” way. There was no way in hell you could ever read ALL the books beside Spencer’s bed. To your relief, the crowd laughs at your slight joke while you continue with the song.

I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings. Uh huh, that’s right.

Darling, you’re the one I want, and I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this. Uh huh, that’s right.

Darling, you’re the one I want in paper rings. In picture frames. In dirty dreams.

Oh, you’re the one I want.

You sing through the second verse without a hitch, coming up to the bridge.

I want to drive away with you. I want your complications too. I want your dreary Mondays, wrap your arms around me Pr-aby boy.

You almost messed up there, could’ve given everything away with one stupid word. It doesn’t look like the team noticed though, since they are all dancing around with the biggest smiles you’ve seen in a while. They are just glad to see you happy again, even if it is just because you are remembering better times.

You’re the one I want, one I want.

You see the applause more than really hear it as the song comes to an end. Your heart is beating way too loud in your ears for you to notice anyway.

“Thank you! Thank you! This next song is kind of a complete about face. 180 degrees if you will. Actually” you pause to think, “it’s more like 540 degrees.” You take in the confused glances from the audience, still searching for that one mop of slightly curly brown hair. “I feel like I went through every emotion possible, returned to where I started, and then was forcefully turned in the opposite direction.” You knew Spencer would know exactly what you were talking about if he was there. You said something eerily similar the last time you saw him.

You can feel the tears again, but you force them back down. You can’t sing and cry at the same time after all. “Clearly, you can tell why I was so happy a month ago. Paper Rings is kind of obvious in that sense. But, 3 weeks, 4 days, 6 hours,” you glance at your watch before continuing, “and 27 minutes ago every possible ounce of that happiness disappeared.”

“For those of you who don’t know, I recently went through a fairly traumatic event. My good friends at the FBI saved my life. But after I left the hospital with a new found relief, I went home and my boyfriend, well I guess ex-boyfriend, came over.”

Here come the tears again. “He didn’t tell me why, but he broke up with me that night. He said he didn’t want to do it while I was in the hospital, so he waited. I’ve had a lot of time to think it over, and I might know now why things changed. But even if I’m wrong, he left. And now, he won’t talk to me.”

You take a few calming breathes before continuing, “Now I know what you’re thinking. This guy sounds like a complete asshat. And maybe you’re kind of right. But he’s been through more than I could even explain, and I know that it is slowly killing him to know that I went through barely a tenth of what has happened to him. Especially because I know he blames himself. So, I have this next song. To try and explain how him leaving is worse than anything that happened in that building.”

The intro to the next song begins and you close your eyes. You can’t bear to look at anything right now. You need to solely focus on making it through this song.

You and I walk a fragile line. I have known it all this time, but I never thought I'd live to see it break.

It's getting dark, and it’s all too quiet, and I can't trust anything now. And it’s coming over you like it’s all a big mistake.

Whoa, holding my breath, won't lose you again. Something's made your eyes go cold.

You can feel you’re voice straining, but you need to push through to truly convey your emotions. Singing is the only way you know how and you won’t lose that. You can’t.

Come on, come on don't leave me like this. I thought I had you figured out. Something's gone terribly wrong, you're all I wanted.

Come on, come on don't leave me like this. I thought I had you figured out. Can't breathe whenever you're gone. Can't turn back now, I'm haunted

You’re voice breaks at the end, but you’ve got a bit of instrumental to recover. You hold back from really looking at anyone during this song. The only face you want to see is Spencer’s and you didn’t see him anywhere while you searched during the first song.

Stood there and watched you walk away, from everything we had. But I still mean every word I said to you.

He will try to take away my pain, and he just might make me smile. But the whole time, I'm wishing it was you instead.

Pushing through the next chorus, you know the tears are welling as you practically scream sing your way through the song. Surprisingly, you are very on pitch. At least you still have that.

I know. I know. I just know, you’re not gone. You can’t be gone, no

The bridge is so simple, but it’s probably the saddest part for you to sing. One more round of the chorus brings you to the outro.

You and I walk a fragile line. I have known it all this time.

Never ever thought I'd see it break. Never thought I'd see it.

A single tear rolls down your cheek as you open your eyes and blink a few times at the lights. You can see the tears streaming down Penelope’s face and sad expressions in every single one of your friends eyes. Even Hotch seems choked up.

You pull yourself together to finish the show. “I know what you’re thinking” you joke with the crowd. “What the hell happened to you?” You take another calming breathe. “Well, a lot. But every song I am singing tonight, they are all to the same person. The one person in the world who understands me more than anyone else. You should all know, however, the ‘he’ I was referring to when I sung ‘he will try to take away my pain’ is none other than my therapist. Thanks for the all the help Doc, I’m trying to do what you said.” You can feel the smile returning to your face, even if it is a little forced.

“The last song I have for you is what I wish I had the chance to say that night 3 weeks, 4 days 6 hours,” again you check your watch, “and now 33 minutes ago.” You laugh at the ridiculous nature of remembering it down to the minute. Something you are so sure Spencer knows without having to think about.

“It’s something I need you to know.” You don’t look at anyone in particular while you sing, but you know exactly who you are singing to as the song starts.

One look. Dark room. Meant just, for you. Time moved, too fast. You played, it back.

Buttons, on a coat. Light hearted joke. No proof. Not much. But you saw, enough.

Small talk, he drives. Coffee, at midnight. The light, reflects. The chain, on your neck.

He says, look up. And your shoulders brush. No proof, one touch.

You felt enough.

This song is so beautiful in its simplicity. You’re grateful for the easy melody since your emotions are weighing on you so heavily right now.

You can hear it in the silence, silence, you.

You can feel it on the way home, way home, you.

You can see it with the lights out, lights out.

You are in love, true love.

You are in love.

It hurts more than expected to say those words about Spencer without actually looking into his eyes.

Morning, his place. Burnt toast, Sunday. You keep, his shirt. He keeps, his word.

And for once, you let go. Of your fears and your ghosts. One step, not much, but it said enough.

You kissed, on sidewalks. You fight, and you talk. One night, he wakes. Strange look, on his face.

Pauses, then says, you're my best friend. And you knew what it was,

he is in love.

Since the first time you heard that song, it has been one of your favorites. It was almost bittersweet to sing that song to Spencer right now when you weren’t even sure he was in the audience.

As the final chords of the song end you take a few deep breaths, just enough to say goodbye to the crowd.

“Thank you all so much for coming! We can only hope for and work towards a better future than the present we find ourselves in. Goodnight.” You took a steadying breath as you rose from your stool and went back to your dressing room. The tears started streaming down your face the minute you turned away from the crowd, and at the moment you had no idea if they would ever stop. You immediately put on your go to emotional TS playlist “for when you are feeling everything all at once” and sunk to the floor.

tag list:

@mac99martin @goldeng1rl8 @eevee0722 @l0ve-0f-my-life @haylaansmi @dinonuggets15 @laurakirsten0502 @green-intervention @burnin-passion @takeyourleap-of-faith @secretpickleprofessordean @awkwardnesshabitat @loveheathens @fan-girl-97 @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat @akuri-shinsou @prongsyy @panhoeofmanyfandoms @sherlockmarvelharrypotter

#spencer reid angst #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #Criminal Minds #criminal minds x reader

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rintarous · 4 years

Text

after shutting off your phone, you immediately jumped out of your seat and waved at your brother and his teammates from the balcony as they said their thanks to the audience. you made eye contact with tsukishima and rushed downstairs to congratulate them in person.

“you guys that was an amazing rally!” you squealed as you met up with them in the luggage area. “thank you, y/n” daichi smiles. you clapped your hands and walk towards to your brother. “keikei you were on fire today! akiteru nii chan is definitely going to cry when i’ll tell him” you rambled, linking your arm with tsukishima

“did you have to make that rhyme?” was all he could let out, tired from long ass game they played against inarizaki. “where’s shoyo and tobio?” you looked around for the freak duo. “SHOYOOOOO” you jump at him. “y/n!” he screamed back, catching you as you latch yourself onto the middle blocker

“HOW DARE YOU MISS THAT TOSS FROM TOBIO” you nagged at him. hinata drops you as he scratches the back of his neck in shame. “that jump felt good” he reasons. “you dumbass” kageyama buts in your conversation, smacking hinata on the back of his head. “OY KAGEYAMA-KUN” hinata swats him away.

you tapped kageyama on his back, “yeah?” he looks down at you in confusion. you motioned him to come closer and you whispered something in his ear. “do you know anyone in inarizaki?” you asked. kageyama raises a brow but nods his head. “yeah, miya-san. why?” he answers.

you smiled devilishly. “can you do me a favor tobio-chan~?”

—

you, along with tsukishima and kageyama were on your way to look for atsumu miya and his team. “kageyama, you could’ve said no to my sister you know?” tsukishima groans for what seems like the nth time today. you stopped in your tracks and flipped your hair to glare at your brother. “why are you with us then?”

tsukishima rolls his eyes, “so i can see if you’re gonna do anything stupid and irresponsible like last time” he deadpans. you let out a small gasp, ready to smack your 6′3 ft. brother in the face until kageyama speaks up.

“miya-san!” kageyama calls to his blonde upperclassman he met at the japan youth training camp. “oh hey tobio-kun” atsumu waves, zipping his bag and walked towards the setter. you scanned the people behind him to look for a certain someone.

“i have a request from my teammate’s sister” kageyama starts, moving towards to the side for you to come out and meet atsumu miya. “aww is she a fan?” atsumu grins widely, “you want a selfie with me? since tobio-kun asked, sure” he assumes, grabbing a hold of your shoulders to pull you to his side.

“actually no” you say, removing his hand from your shoulder with no emotion, shocking atsumu. this was probably the first time he got rejected. your brother, who was behind kageyama, covers his mouth to prevent himself from laughing out loud. luckily, he manages to make it seem like he was coughing.

“she wants a picture with your middle blocker. the one who has the jersey number 10″ kageyama explains while you stand beside him, looking at your nails, completely ignoring atsumu who was beet red.

“o-oh” atsumu chokes out. “with suna.. okay wait i’ll get him” he jogs back to his team who were just lounging around their baggage area. “who was that ‘tsumu?” osamu asks as he stares at you, kageyama and tsukishima. “the guy i met at training camp. apparently the chick next to him wants a picture with suna” atsumu shares to his brother.

“SUNA?!” osamu exclaims in shock, whipping his head towards suna’s direction. “yo what the hell do you want from me” suna groans, hiding more in his varsity jacket, if that was even more possible while scrolling mindlessly through his phone. “someone wants a picture with you c’mon lets go” atsumu grabs his arm and forces him up.

“who wants to take a picture with me?!” suna complains as he was basically dragged out of his own will away from his little space he made for himself back there. “her” atsumu motions you to suna.

“shit it’s the girl i made eye contact with at the vending machine earlier” suna thinks to himself as he stares at you, who was busy talking to kageyama and tsukishima.

“here’s our middle blocker!” atsumu presents suna as if he was some powerpoint presentation. “this is suna” atsumu introduces you to him. kageyama gives you a small push to him. “kageyama!” you gasp as you were standing next to the person you’ve kept your eye on all day.

“take my phone and hurry up” you chucked your phone at kageyama who barely manages to catch it. atsumu leaves the frame as kageyama positions the phone. “1, 2, 3... smile!” atsumu chirps as he looks at the pictures kageyama was taking.

“suna don’t just stand there! do something!” atsumu jokes, looking at how stoic suna was compared to you who was so lively and smiling at every angle possible. suna sighs and throws up a half-assed peace sign. “there we go!” atsumu laughs, clapping his hands.

“you were great out there” you compliment suna beside you. suna raises a brow again, “you think so?” you felt the blood rush to your cheeks. you were practically speaking to the guy you’ve been tweeting about. “yeah it was like love at first sight” you bat your eyelashes at him.

“oh god.. is this what the twin’s fangirls are like?” he thinks to himself, grimacing a bit at the sudden confession. you grabbed your phone from kageyama and skimmed through the pictures he took. you smiled happily as you see at least 20 pictures in your gallery. one of them was gonna be your wallpaper for sure.

“can i take a selfie with you before i go?” you ask suna who looked like he was ready to dash back to their area. suna internally groans but nods anyway. completely ignoring that shit eating grin that was plastered on atsumu’s face.

“hey why are you guys taking so long?” osamu joins in the little circle. “fuck” suna curses under his breath. “hey suna what are you doing?” osamu asks, walking up to atsumu. “oh how cute. they’re taking selfies” he comments.

you ignored the two boys as you held your phone up high. since you were too short, suna had to crouch down a bit. you took a bunch more and just posed in every way possible. “thank you” you gushed, scrolling through the photos again.

suna shoves his hands in his pockets and walks back to their luggage area, leaving the twins with you guys. “hey y/n right?” you hear atsumu call out. you turned around and looked at him with a blank expression. “yeah” you turned your attention back at your phone.

“can we have your twitter or something? you seem like a fun person to be with” atsumu asks, whipping his phone out. you shrugged and told him your username. “it’s tsukkiyn” you took a peek at his phone that has twitter open. “okay followed you. see you!” atsumu waves goodbye to you and your group as he along with his twin walk back to their baggage area.

“bye! thank you miya-san!” kageyama bows at his upperclassman as you walk side by side with tsukki, grinning ear to ear. “happy now?” tsukishima asks as the three of you head back to the team. “very” you squealed, staring at your phone gallery filled with pictures of you and suna.

“he shall be my boyfriend in no time” you declared, shocking the two boys beside you. “you’re so confident, y/n. how do you do it” kageyama chuckles. “yeah let’s not make it seem like he’s some toy alright?” tsukishima reminds. “besides, they’re from hyogo, we’re from miyagi” you scoffed, “you didn’t have to put it like that kei” tsukishima shrugs, “just saying”

—

“SUNA HAS A FAN!” atsumu screams, jumping around the poor boy. “yeah let’s not talk about that” suna waves him off, bringing his attention back to his phone in hopes atsumu would get the hint and leave him alone. “who has a what now?” he hears kita ask.

suna never wanted to hide in a hole til now.

“it’s suna, kita-san!” atsumu beams in joy, “they even took a picture together” osamu adds. suna whips his head towards osamu and had the biggest look of disbelief on his face. “sorry bro but.. it’s unusual for us” osamu chuckles

“i even got her twitter! but it seems like she ain’t interested in me” atsumu mumbles the last part. “not everyone is after you, dickwad” osamu retorts, sitting next to his best friend, suna.

“i don’t understand why you all find this so amusing” suna mumbles under his breath. too bad for him, osamu heard it. “cuz’ it’s like the first time we’ve seen someone who wants a picture with you or somethin’“ osamu reasons. “plus she looked like she was an atsumu fan but no., she’s a suna fan” osamu continues, wiggling his eyebrows.

suna takes a deep breath and rolls his eyes, “we’re not idols. we’re volleyball players” knowing they won’t stop pestering him anytime soon, suna plugs in his airpods and raises the volume to the max.

as if! — six ( suna has a fan )

[ prev / next ]

↬ what you want is what you get. thats how its always been for you growing up. but the one time you let time and destiny do it’s thing, surprise, surprise! it’s not how you want it to be. maybe you‘re just clueless on how things should play out without having it your way.

a/n: wow i can actually write??? 🤡 p.s since no one asked heres an update

[ taglist: @therealwalmartjesus @90s-belladonna @babybluebisexual @o-o0613 @thenezuko @tycrackculture @kuroos-babie @clowninfortodoroki @dorkyama @iikiag @wakaitoshi @svtbitch @reogou @whalien52dreams @prettysetter @floralprintedsheets @kisskeiji @preparingtofall @kaffulatte @akaaaashit @imuziawi @thenezuko @shoutobabyboy @issalilmessy @akaashi-bby @k-gada @jimilogy @inairizaki @terriblejob-sam @kuryusmu @miyuswriting ]

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peeterparkr · 4 years

Text

perfidy;tom holland|20

chapter 20: the screenwriter.

enemies to lovers au/enemies with benefits

chapter summary: the battlefield and the casualties.

pairing: tom holland x y/n

warnings: angst, angst, angst, I use war as a metaphor,

word count: 10.1 k

playlist(1: with song names)

playlist 2 (Spotify link)

Playlist: perf1Dy (one direction+solo songs)

social media before you read :

PART ONE: BEFORE THE PARTY || PART TWO: THE PARTY

previous chapter next chapter series masterlist sequel name announcement

Hi :) thanks to @peachybloomss for being my beta reader. You’re gonna hate me, bye! :)! 🍉

Chaos. Chaos. Chaos.

You could hear it, the chaos, people running, shaking, disaster. Your heart was beating fast if you had one, that is. Did you have a heart after this?

How was your heart working after all of this was beyond your knowledge. Everything was ruined. You couldn’t pity yourself now, you had no right. You wouldn’t cry, not right now. You were okay.

You were running through a battlefield, bleeding, but it was still not over. Your wounds could wait because honestly, they didn’t matter. But you knew it, you’d never heal. You needed a storm to wash away the pain, but the chaos was bringing more chaos.

You had walked back into the house, not sure why; not sure who you were looking for. What were you trying to do?

Emma. Yes, Emma first.

Even as the chaos continued.

You needed to hurry, you wanted to run. You’d rather be anywhere. Anywhere, seriously. Because this was your fault. This was completely your fault. The rain was supposed to pour down, the war was supposed to start. You were the one to cause this, you were the double agent. The duplicity. Had you told Tom earlier about the script, had you not written all your damn thoughts then you wouldn’t be here. Maybe you wouldn’t be dating Tom, but maybe that was a sacrifice that you would have paid instead of this chaos. Instead of this battle.

The war continued and this seemed like it had been the last battle, both of you had lost. Both of you were bleeding.

He hadn’t listened to you.

But you had made the weapon that had destroyed you both, you and Tom. This was your fault. Sure, he had done it in the worst timing. But he was not a monster. You had painted him wrong. But he hadn’t listened to you you. He hadn’t asked. You didn’t blame him, he didn’t know your whole story.

But then again, you didn’t know his.

This wasn’t his fault, he was a spark waiting for a long time to be ignited. Alcohol is flammable.

Could you ever carry on? And though you knew you couldn’t fix it, the first thing you’d done was to look up for him. As if in a cry for help, as if asking him to save you. To save him.

But you both needed saving.

You rushed through the crowd who were clearly still talking, shocked. They were talking. And you were a villain. You were the bad guy in their story because they didn’t know the whole story. But they didn’t need to, because they knew something true.

But you saw Timmy, helping Emma get across to the stairs, she was crying, she was wounded. The casualty.

You rushed to her, you needed to fix this with her. She was your friend, you were not meant to hurt her. She was not supposed to fall into this mess. She didn’t deserve this.

“Emma,” you called. Timmy was sad, too, but he seemed angry. You’d never seen him this way. He was pissed, his sight was dark. He was very, very angry.

Timmy turned to see you, he shook his head.

“Please, can I talk to you?” You asked anyway, approaching them, as Emma kept going upstairs.

Timmy followed after. “No, y/n it’s not a good time,” he warned you.

You followed them. “Please, please, Emma--.”

“No, get away from me,” Emma finally turned around to you as you were both on the edge of the stairs. “I knew it—I knew it,” she cried, as she tried to catch her breath. “I’m—y/n, I just—” Tears were falling down her face as she took a deep breath. “No, it’s not… I’m not even—” Her voice was cracking. “You and Tom should fucking solve your problems alone but now—”

“I’m sorry, Emma, it’s all a misunderstanding.”

“Is it?” She turned darker. “He said it! How you wrote a script and apparently you loved my fiance!”

You felt a dagger in your chest. “No, it was taken out of context—” You tried to implore.

She scoffed. “Was it, y/n?” she growled. “Because I’ve been living in fear that you’ll one day finally realize it! Maybe you didn’t know it, y/n, but I saw it! Fuck you saw it too, right Timmy?”

Tim pursed his lips as he took a deep breath.

“No, Emma—I swear, it’s nothing like you think it is,” you explained.

Emma ran to you, she was crying, and she looked at you, her eyes full of tears begging for an explanation.

“Emma, come here, let’s calm down,” Timmy grabbed her hand and tried to pull her back to him, Emma pushed his hand away.

“No—I’m not—” She warned Timmy and then turned back to you. “I thought you were my friend.”

“I am your friend, Emma I didn’t mean for all of this to happen,” you urged.

She was shaking, her hands were shaking as she tried to hug herself. “Then why? Why—Are you trying to take him away from me?” She shrieked.

“No, I’m not—No, I want you both to be happy, I know he loves you.”

Emma screamed and brought her hands to her head.

Timmy rushed to pull her into a hug, calming her down. “Okay, Emma, no please, calm down.”

She pushed him away and punched her way out of his embrace. “Don’t you fucking dare to defend her right now, Timmy, because guess what she didn’t fucking love you either.”

Neither you and Timmy said anything. You both knew Emma was angry, and one should never speak when we’re angry.

“Because of-- fuck, and your whole act? Loving Tom?” She snapped. “It wasn’t true, was it?”

“I’m in love with Tom,” you snapped, somehow that had triggered you even more. “I am not in love with Harry, I love him as a best friend-”

She only glared. “Did something ever happen between you and Harry?”

“Nothing, Emma! I swear nothing happened, ever!” You tried to explain.

She crossed her arms, “and did you ever wish something could happen?”

You shook your head. “No!”

Emma was fuming, but Timmy took her hand again. “Emma come on.”

Emma had given up at that point, as she only made her way to a room. “And tell your boyfriend to fuck off!” She yelled at you before disappearing with Tim.

That was a lost battle. The second lost battle here. You knew it, you wouldn’t win another. You rushed downstairs back to the other chaos, with people rushing and staring. Talking.

You saw Sam, he seemed hurt, he avoided you. Dom and Nikki were talking to Emma’s parents. You saw James, and he only sighed.

You gulped, continuing your way around the house, and you saw the garden again. You saw curls, rushing as he was heading anywhere, you saw Harry walking in circles. Stressed. He was angry, he was sad, he was confused.

You walked past the battlefield and ran to him, he was talking to himself, rubbing his face and his hair.

“Harry,” you said quietly, almost not wanting him to hear.

He only glared at you and walked away.

You followed him. “Harry, Harry, please—Please I’m sorry.”

He shook his head. “No, y/n,” he gulped. “I really don’t think I can be seen with you right now okay?”

He was calm. He wasn’t angry. He was too calm for your convenience. Harry was always calm to you, but you didn’t want him to be calm. He couldn’t be calm to you.

“I—I’m sorry,” was all you could say.

He took a deep breath, bringing his hands to his face. “This isn’t—” He looked at you. “Look, I asked you only one thing today, okay?”He gulped. “And now—Now if they see me talking to you everyone will think—Fuck.”

“I’m sorry.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s not even your fault—” The calmness on his voice had disappeared. “Or maybe it is!” He scoffed. “I don’t even know right now—I don’t even know how to fucking feel!” He confessed. “This is bloody ruined.”

“I’m sorry... I should’ ve—I should’ve calmed Tom,” you didn’t even know how to apologize to him.

He clenched his jaw, placing his hands on his hips. He was too stressed. It was the first time you couldn’t know how he was feeling. For the first time in your life, you didn’t know what the hell was going through your best friend’s mind. You didn’t blame him.

“No, but here’s the thing y/n,” his voice had turned so deep, and dark, raspy. “I’m angry at you,” he stated. “Because he probably got mad for a reason, and what he said--I mean, I’m angry because his reasons are justified,” Harry continued. “So, I’m angry at you, because…” He shook his head. “But I’m angrier at him because he couldn’t wait! Bloody hell if he’d caused a scene with only the three of us, I wouldn’t have,” he closed his eyes. “But I’m angry because--It always has to be about him he always fucking puts on a show, he always fucking does this! And that’s—I don’t-” He couldn’t map out his emotions.

You repeat yourself. “I’m sorry.”

“I—I don’t even know how to—” He clenched his jaw. “And you!”He laughed, a dark laugh. “And now everyone thinks we—I don’t even know what they think!”

“I’m sorry.”

“And the worst part is that—I—I can’t get married now, Emma probably doesn’t… I just please get away from me.”

You left, knowing this was another lost battle. Three battles now. And you didn’t know which one hurt more.

You saw your parents, they looked sad, disappointed. And confused. Everyone was confused.

But you kept searching for your brother, he only quietly led the way outside. You saw Tuwaine, he only gave you a second glance. Harrison and Sam again. You saw them yelling, watching as Tom was throwing up on some random bushes.

You tried to walk in, but James tried to stop you.

“Sam—Sam,” you called.

Sam turned to you. “Not right now y/n.” He was cold.

“I’m sorry,” you said for what seemed the thousandth time.

Sam looked away.

James frowned, as he took you by your hand and dragged you away. “I don’t even understand why you’re apologizing, you—This isn’t your fault.”

“But it is.”

James stayed with you that night. You didn’t cry. You weren’t sure why. Maybe it was guilt. It probably was guilt. You didn’t sleep. James had taken your phone, to make sure you didn’t text or call anybody. He said you needed to calm down. He was right, you needed to calm down.

Which was weird, because you weren’t making a scene. You were too quiet, you didn’t know how to react to this. He asked the real reason why Tom was mad.

And you gave him the script. He stayed up all night to read it. You had stayed up in your room, hugging your little frog.

You thought about it, how you always had it wrong when it came to love. Always the wrong streets. You had fucked it up, badly. With Harry, with Tim, with Tom. You never knew what the hell was up. There were no more tears that could help this. But you really didn’t want to go to that dark place again, you couldn’t go there. You needed to cry, but the tears didn’t want to come out, as if you were too proud. The moon was judging you, washing your silks as you were barely breathing.

There was a part that had you thinking that Tom was still wrong. Not because he didn’t have the right to be mad, but because he truly didn’t know where you had been. Because you had meant those words, most of them, because that’s how you’d felt. And though he wasn’t a monster, you’d been there. He had robbed you of your happiness, or your chances to be happy. Because that’s how you really felt. You couldn’t pretend he didn’t hurt you. You couldn’t pretend you hadn’t cried for months, you couldn’t fucking pretend you hadn’t gone to the doctor only to be told you were heartbroken.

Because that was also truth. Because you had lost yourself, you had drowned. You couldn't pretend he hadn’t been a monster. You wouldn’t have expected yourself from a few years ago to be okay with it.

Because it had hurt, so much. You had cried, you had bled. Because it was true. Tom has been a monster. And you couldn’t lie, not with that.

But the script was the story of how the beast turned into a beautiful creature, of how you had found that he had a heart. But that didn’t mean he hadn’t been a monster. It really had felt awful.

But he changed your mind, he changed the story. That’s what he didn’t get. Because this was your side of the story and you couldn’t simply erase it.

But did it matter now? To fight for your story?

And there you were, laying down on the bed when nights before he’d kissed you. You were alone now, your room was cold. And you wish he’d never left. You wished he had listened to you.

But you both were so stupid, you both were so happy. And one of you had to fire, because this was a war. You wish it hadn’t been you.

Maybe he was crying this time. Maybe he was feeling like you had after those flowers. Were you both staring at an empty feeling? Was he going to call you? Was he expecting you to call him?

And had you really wanted that? To make him feel the way you had? You couldn’t want that.

But your pain didn’t justify you. But it was different now. And then there you were. Wishing you’d never written it.

And you felt lonely. And you didn’t want to feel lonely.

You needed to be with him. You didn’t like the night now, he wasn’t there to hold you. The stars were not bright, You knew this was over, he was over. And it was so hard, knowing you had hurt him. This was you digging your end.

And you looked at your walls, this couldn’t be over.

James had walked into your room the next morning, he hadn’t slept.

“He didn’t finish it,” James pointed out. “Did he?”

“No.”

James sat down. “But I get where he’s coming from.”

You nodded. “Yeah.”

He sighed. “You really fucked it up, huh?” He asked. “Still I don’t… I don’t think he did it right by snapping there.”

You stayed quiet.

“There are a lot of things that you don’t understand about Tom,” James started. “None of us, really. But I get where he’s coming from. He loves you.”

“Does he?”

He sighed. “Well.”

“He said it, he’s tired of pretending he loves me, and he said it, how I deserve to be lonely, maybe he’s right.”

“No, no, y/n.”

“I need to be, for a few days, I’m not… I need time, okay? It’s hard enough for me, and right now, I need a favour, please, if you can, talk to them, to Harry, to Sam, explain to them how Tom wasn’t the one who fucked up, he’s not a monster, okay?”

James watched you.

“I love him, James,” you admitted. “I can’t believe I did this to him. And… I’ve hurt him, all of them. Timmy, Harry, Tom.”

He sighed. “And how can you fix this?” He asked.

“I don’t know. “

“Who will you try to fix first?” He questioned. “Who do you want to keep in your life?”

“Do I have to choose only one?”

“Y/N,” James rolled his eyes. “It’s not--”

“I love Tom,” you admitted. “But Harry is my best friend.”

“And Tim?”

You pinched the bridge of your nose.

“You know you have to give up one.”

“But why?” You frowned. “I don’t want… I don’t know, I can’t give up my friendship with Harry, and… I know Timmy will stay, as a friend. But Tom… At least I want him in life, I need him, I love him. I want to fix it, but I know I can’t.”

“He has to know you love him.”

“I know…And for that… Maybe I have to be lonely.”

And you were lonely, for a few days. But it was alright. You needed time to think, to craft this. No one had reached out for you. And maybe Tom had been right, you had fucked it up, and maybe you’d be alone. You deserved it. You really were alone right now, and you didn’t care. Because you needed to think about it, find a way to fix this. Big mistakes were made. Because it had been fragile. So fragile. And you broke Tom.

That didn’t mean you couldn’t try and fix this.

But you couldn’t get your mind at ease. Because this was you, but he hadn’t read it. He didn’t understand it. He didn’t understand how you had changed it. How he had changed the story.

And you had an idea. What you could tell was that Tom was the angriest because he didn’t believe you loved him. And you didn’t blame him.

But you had to prove him. And it was weird because, for the first time, you’d broken his heart.

But this wasn’t easy.

Sure, he’d hurt you, too. This wasn’t a first time he’d hurt you, but you thought you’d learned better. And you’d be lying if you said his own words hadn’t shattered you either. Because he said you deserved to be lonely, and he said he pretended to love you. And you believed him. Maybe he had pretended to love you. You played with fire, and you had both burned.

And you couldn’t stop yourself from crying now, because this was all ruined. And he hadn’t listened to you. You’d hurt him. And Harry. And Tim.

There was only emptiness now, you didn’t even feel… anything. Nothing to say would solve this. Maybe you had to face it, maybe this time it was over for good. And you had to accept it.

But right now, you were trying to figure out if it had only been only an act of playing pretend, you were trying to understand if you really had gone to the battle wanting to win. Maybe you were destined to lose. Because you were sure that even if you were now standing in the end, there was still a beginning.

And so you had an idea, to show the first times. Everybody talks about first times, but not the best ones. Not the ones that really settle in a relationship. Not the ones that you barely remember. But they’re important.

Everybody remembers the first kiss, the first date, the first time you slept together, the first time saying I love you. You clearly remembered those.

But you had your way of remembering them.

But remembering only hurt more because it all led to this, seeing the polaroids on your wall, the napkin, your dresses, the pictures on your phone. This was the story of a breakup, the story of how something that could’ve been. The story of how you had ruined this.

And you had been alone thinking. If you turned back to where it all started, wanting to win the war, did you really want to win it? Had this been the sweet revenge you were looking for? Or had it been just a pathetic excuse just to get close to him and finally accept your feelings? Maybe this just meant you were both too proud to accept it. But you were hurt, too.

Very, very hurt.

And now there you were, wondering what you had done wrong, wanting to turn back time so you had said no to that dare, to that script, if you hadn’t written those horrible words. Because then it wouldn’t have hurt that much. Both playing pretend but both letting each other fall.

But you remembered a first time, the first time you kissed, the first time you crushed on him and the last time he hurt you and the day you had promised yourself you’d never think of Tom Holland as anything but an asshole whom you would never trust, and you remembered that from a very young age you’d promised yourself that you’d never get tangled in his charms. Because they were not true.

But you weren’t really one to talk now about truthful charms and you couldn’t say anything because you were no better than him.

You went back to that promise, after burning yellow flowers. And how you had initially written it, how Tom Holland--William was so vain, and arrogant and too proud of himself. And everything revolved around him. Even your mind and your heart right now. But it was Tom, the idiot you’ve sworn you’d hate your whole life and the one who annoyed you whenever he strutted into a room.

This was Tom, there was no reason to cry. You’d cried enough for him. You’d always say it: ‘I’d rather have grounds in my coffee than spend 5 minutes with him.’ Yet you were crying. You were crying now.

But you had never hated him. But you knew he hated you now.

What were you even doing? You were drowning again. Were you going to ask him to love him after this? He couldn’t. He wouldn’t.

But you wanted him to know that you had loved him. But you couldn’t make any more promises. Not anymore.

You had gone and bought flowers, loose flowers, and you were fixing them yourself. You never really liked the way the flower shops fixed them, so you usually fixed them yourself, yellow flowers and lavenders. As if you were trying to say something more. As if saying, Valerie apologizes to Will. Which, funnily enough, she had.

It was funny, yellow flowers usually meant happiness, joy. Friendship. And they had quite the opposite meaning when it came to you and Tom. And then you had the lavenders, meaning calmness. As if you tried to soothe Tom.

You hadn’t tried to reach out for Harry. He wouldn’t answer. But you had tried to reach out to Emma. She didn’t answer. Sam barely answered. He’d at least tell you that right now it wasn’t a good time and that he would make sure Tom and Harry would talk, eventually.

Timmy did. Timmy was trying to make sure you were alright. He didn’t tell you anything about Emma, no matter how much you asked.

You hadn’t tried to reach out Tom. You wanted to, but you never could hit send. You knew a text wouldn’t fix this. You wondered if he would hover over your name too. You wondered if he expected you to call, and if you did, would he answer?

And was he okay?

Because you knew that it would be delicate to try and do it. Would it hurt more if he answered? Did you even want to answer?

Did he miss you? Did he miss you as much as you missed him? Did he want the same thing you did? Because all you could wish for was for this to disappear, only for a few minutes, only to hug him. Would he want that? Pause everything just so you could hold him?

And Harry? Your best friend, he wasn’t there. Nobody wanted to see you now. And you knew it, probably nobody wanted to know about you. Because you were the bad one.

You wanted to pretend for a bit, imagine that Tom was still yours. You didn’t want to eat, you didn’t want to sleep. You had gone out, once. To see how the world was still spinning, nobody had stopped.

And nobody had reached out for you.

You didn’t want to go to sleep because you’d be waking up alone. Your clothes were all stained now, with him. With him. Fuck, your room was horrible. It only reminded you of what you had lost. Harry, Tom, Timmy.

You only wanted some company. Maybe you didn’t want to be lonely. Though you deserved it, you didn’t. You just wanted a little love, because there was still so much love left. You hadn’t lived enough.

You needed Harry, you needed Tom.

God, you needed Harry.

But you knew you had to let them go. In your cold room, you didn’t want to see it. Not anymore. Because it only reminded you of what you’d done.

And you had bought what seemed a million flowers, one, two, three, hundred of bouquets, of arrangements. But they didn’t look pretty. You couldn’t give that to him. They didn’t scream that you loved him. Lavender and yellow flowers. You didn’t know what you were trying to say.

Except you did: ‘Love me, Tom’.

And what about Harry? How on earth were you going to apologize? He was your best friend. And now he knew. He knew that you had loved him. But he was not supposed to ever know, because you’d lose him. And losing him would be the worst thing you could think of.

You could lose Tom. But not Harry. Never Harry. Because that would mean you’d die slowly, alone. And you thought about it, how this had ended with just a stupid script. And why the hell had you written that?

Couldn’t Valerie just be a bloody dancer? But you couldn’t pretend you hadn’t felt that. You just couldn’t ignore your feelings.

And your room, your room gave it all the signs.

You had been absent. Disappeared from the world. Social media, at least. You couldn’t stomach seeing anything.

James made sure to bring you food, every now and then. Tea. Pancakes. But you didn’t want them anymore.

You stared at the flowers, you stared at the box. The pathetic excuse you had. But you knew you had to do this, Tom wouldn’t want to see you now.

Did you want to see him? Because this had only proven that you would hurt him. You’d both eventually hurt each other again.

But it hurt, and there was that pain across your chest again. Especially since he had said he “pretend to love you.”

You didn’t want to be lonely, so you had called Charlie and Danielle, they had brought ice cream. That’s what you needed, but it had been awful, their confession hadn’t exactly been what you needed this time. You had spent that day with them, listening to Charlie and his shade, Danielle being dumb.

“That day of your interview,” Charlie had said. “We kind of told Tom the same thing we did to you.”

“What did you tell him?”

“About the tension you guys had,” Danielle said, “that he—“

“We were joking, as we usually do, we told him it’d take him no less than two beers to finally end up with your tension. We kind of said.. You know, the whole ‘Id bet you that if you tried to, you could’, you know? that he could take you to bed—I was joking—And then that night we headed to the bar—and he was flirting with you, as if he tried to prove a point to us,” Charlie explained.

And that’s how it had started because they had put the idea to get him to get you to bed. It wasn’t even his own original thought.

And to bloody think that this was all because Charlie and Danielle were fucking joking? Because they had put the thought in both of you? Fucking hell.

Of course, you were hurt. But you were no better, and even if—you didn’t know how to feel about it. But even if the first time had been for a stupid joke or bet or whatever, that didn’t cancel out what you’d done.

But he said he pretended to love you. But you didn’t believe him. Or did you?

If he didn’t love you. Then why the hell were you going to fight for him? You hadn’t accepted it. You had denied this. You didn’t want this. In your mind, Tom had loved you. He had to love you. Because if not, then why the hell had all of this happened?

You didn’t want to say anything.

You couldn’t sleep because he’d be in your dreams. Flashbacks of good scenes. The moon, the stars, the sun. Nothing was bright. It would be, someday. But not today, not soon.

You missed his touch, his lips, his skin. You missed him. And you regretted it. The tears were the only story you wanted to write now. Because he was going to be gone for good.

You arranged the flowers yet again and then you heard someone at your door. Was it Tom? You ran to the door, expecting to see him.

What would you say to him? That you had more pages? That you’d written more pages even when this was over? That you wanted to lay down by his side just one more time. To make sure he was alright. Just to be with him.

That you wanted to be with him only one more night. Because it had all ended so quickly.

And you’d tell him that this was the worst thing you’d done. That you missed him like hell. That you’d take care of him.

But it wasn’t. It wasn’t Tom.

“Hi, I came because I know that you’re probably shutting everyone out so—“Timmy said. You definitely weren’t expecting him. “I just needed to check on you.”

Your heart warmed up. He cared. You let him in as you saw he had some supermarket bags.

You couldn’t believe it was him.

“Thank you, Tim.”

“I brought you these, actual food because if I know you—You’ve been eating takeout haven’t you?”

“Thank you, how much do I owe you?”

It was weird, how even after everything. After you broke his heart, he was there, to take care of you.

How did he not let you be lonely?

Your apartment was a mess. With Polaroids scattered on the floor, flowers here and there, an open box. Clothes hanging around. A story. Your tears, your sorrow.

“What’s all this?” He asked, and then looked at the flowers. “He sent these to you?”

You shook your head. “No, I’m giving them to him.”

“You made the arrangement, didn’t you?” He asked. “That’s why they look pretty.”

“Aren’t you angry?”

You watched Tim go to your kitchen, you followed after him.

“A bit,” he said calmly. “But You can’t have yet someone else angry at you. “

“I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” he said. “So, what are the flowers for?”

“I’m going to apologize.”

“After what he did?” He asked as he took out the groceries he’d bought. He. “You need to apologize?” Tim shook his head. “No, yn— He is a monster.”

“He is not, Tim, he made a mistake—“

“What he did to Emma—?” Timmy snapped. You knew this wasn’t about you, Tim wasn’t even angry at Tom for you. This was Timmy protecting Emma.

“I know, I know, Emma happened to be the unfortunate casualty in this war and I’m sorry—And I really am sorry.”

He sighed, as he opened the fridge, he raised his brows as he saw the takeouts, cold pizza, and instead placed the food he had bought.

“Casualty. As if this was a war.”

“Wasn’t it?” You frowned.

Timmy turned to you. “No, y/n, that’s your problem, if you walked into a relationship thinking it was a war no wonder you both fired shots.”

You stayed quiet. He was right.

Why had you walked in as if this was a war? If you loved Tom, why had this been a war?

He clenched his jaw, as he leaned against the counter. He looked back at the living room, seeing the whole mess. “What are you even doing?”

“I’m trying to fix everything, okay?” You sighed. “And everyone—I understand where he is coming from. I know. I made a horrible thing, and I hurt him—And now, he is alone and I don’t want him to be. He got drunk. And I don’t want anyone to hurt him—“

Timmy pinched the bridge of his nose. “Y/N why—“

“Because this is my fault, okay?” You snapped. “And I—And I hurt him and I can’t hurt someone I love.”

“I don’t understand,” Timmy admitted. He sighed, “you’re still in love with him,” he stated. “After that?”

“He was drunk, I—I did something very shitty, Tim.”

Timmy sighed. “Still—“

“I wrote a script basing it on this whole love—triangle or whatever it is—okay? He thinks I don’t love him, he didn’t read it. He thought I was dating him only because of the script where I wrote that I was technically fucking dating him to hurt him, a script where I called him a monster, a script in which—I said I dated him only to get revenge.”

Timmy watched you. “Oh.”

You chuckled. “I’m so stupid.”

“Can I read it?”

You hugged yourself. “I don’t know.”

Tim nodded. “You wrote about me, too?”

You had. You knew he wouldn’t be mad. You had written such beautiful things about him. But mostly, It was confusing. About how you regretted saying no, because maybe if he had waited you’d probably’ve said yes. If he had waited just a little bit longer. But not now. Sure, you loved Timmy. Like an old friend, like an old lover. Feelings are never really gone, you know? They transform. But—you wanted to be with Tom. Though it seemed impossible now.

“If I read it, would I be angry?” He asked.

“No,” you shook your head. Hurt, maybe. Confused, absolutely. But not angry.

“You wrote about Harry, from what I could tell,” he pointed out. “Do you love Harry?”

You took a deep breath. “He is my best friend,” you said. “You know it, I did have… feelings for a bit, but it’s like… When you said you had a crush on Emma, when you were younger.”

Timmy nodded. “Yeah, it’s easy to confuse friendship with something else,” he agreed. “Tom didn’t know about Harry?”

You shrugged. “I thought he did, I thought everyone did,” you nodded. “I didn’t hide it. I think that’s—that’s I don’t know. Look, he—He believes I never loved him.”

Timmy laughed. “Is he fucking blind?”

You chuckled. “I don’t blame him, the script—what I wrote was very very very cruel at the beginning.”

“Really?” He asked before going back to the freezer, he saw two pints of ice cream, he took them out, as well as two spoons, handing you one over.

“I initially started writing the script because I wanted to take revenge, that’s what the script says and that’s what I did.”

You stared at the ice cream, as you opened it.

“What?” he asked.

“I don’t know what I was planning to do. Break his heart—guess I’ve got that covered.”

“But?”

“But the script also explained a lot of things, my feelings for you and my feelings for Harry,” you took a spoonful of the ice cream.

“And?”

“And the script talks about my feelings about me—always choosing Tom no matter what.”

Timmy gulped. “Right.” He gulped. “Which really, I don’t know why.”

You shrugged. “The heart is stupid.”

He nodded. “Stubborn, stupid, irrational,” he admitted.

You bit your lip. “How’s Emma doing?”

Timmy gulped. “Yeah she’s — she’s not well.” He admitted.

“She doesn’t like me now, does she?” You asked.

Timmy bit his lip, staring at his ice cream. “Well, she always knew Harry did have something for you.”

“You told her?” You asked.

“No, never but, c’mon, it was obvious.”

And it was.

“And of course she doesn’t particularly like you right now, but she says that this isn’t really your fault, I mean,” he sighed. “Let’s say...Tom is on her list.”

“Yeah, everyone’s list right now.”

Timmy raised his brows. “He has a talent for fucking up.”

You sighed. “Tell me about it, he learned from me.”

He looked up and gave you a sad smile. “But you love him.”

You took another spoonful of ice cream. “I do.”

“Yikes.”

You punched him on the shoulder, he chuckled. “Shut up.”

You stayed quiet for a bit, wondering why he had come here. He wasn’t trying to win you back, or was he? Was he going to try to take advantage of the situation?

“Why are you here?” You asked him.

He looked up. “Because I know everyone is taking care of Emma, of Harry, even of Tom, but no one seemed to see if you were okay.”

“But I’m the bad guy,” you said.

He shrugged. “That doesn’t mean you deserve to be lonely.”

“But maybe I do, I was the one to fuck up.”

“Not really, well-- Not completely, I mean you did fuck up,” He agreed. “But he could’ve waited just not to fuck up his brother’s engagement.”

You sighed. “Are they still engaged?”

Timmy bit his lip.

“Because it’s not Harry’s fault,” you said. “Harry deserves to be happy, Emma deserves to be happy.”

“Dunno, Emma believes something happened with you and Harry,” Tim said. “And though I’ve tried to explain to her that even if something had happened, it would have been before they even met well but...She’s… I don’t blame her, Harry has been…”

“Harry?”

Tim sighed. “Harry has been quiet, absent.”

“He’s probably angry, hurt, at Tom,” you said.

“Emma says she wants to give the ring back—”Timmy sighed. “You could give her advice on that.”

You glared at him. “Tim.”

He laughed. “I’m trying to make you laugh.”

That made you smile.

“What would you do?” You asked eventually after you’d both stayed quiet for a while, just eating ice cream.

“Hm?”

“If you were in my place,” you pushed.

He sighed. “I’d… I honestly don't know.” He watched you. “I don’t know how bad the script is, so I don’t know, I mean.”

You bit your lip, and you walked to the living room, you stared at the pictures, the lipsticks, everything. Tim followed after, watching you as you sat on the floor. He sighed as he left to your room, he brought back your frog and then handed it over.

“You know, y/n, I’ve seen everything in this world, and then there’s you.”

You chuckled. “I’m a fucking mess.”

Tim sighed, sitting down on the floor with you. “Yeah.”

Timothée took a deep breath. “What’s your plan?”

You shook your head, “No, Tim, you don’t have to,” you sighed.

“Look, who else is going to help you?” He shrugged.

You watched him. “Timmy.”

He shrugged. “Look, I’m not…” He coughed. “Though it hurts, and if you… If he’s that stupid that you have to do a… What are you doing a... collage?”

You chuckled. “I don’t know.”

“Well, I might as well help you,” he shrugged. “If that makes you happy.”

And you knew Tim, he really wasn’t trying to pull a stunt right now. He knew you, after all, he’d met you in a dark time, and he knew how much you hated to be lonely. He was there because he meant it, to keep you company. He cooked for you, he stayed there making sure you were okay, and he made sure he made you smile.

The next day, you were ready. Timmy hadn’t really helped you with it, he had just kept you company. And then he had left.

And you’d stayed up all night, trying to figure it out. You had the flowers, you had the box. The last pages of your script. How could you prove to Tom you loved him? That it had been him. That it was him. That you were thankful he’d gone to Rome, even if you didn’t know why. That you were thankful after prom, that you had loved New York and every single kiss. That you hadn’t meant this.

You had the last pages of your script. You printed them. But still, this… You sighed, memories.

Memories.

You opened your laptop, maybe you did have the answer all along.

And so, with little hope and only with a half-apology, you went to search for Tom, with flowers, with a box full of polaroids, and with more things that would probably explain it to him that it was him.

You saw it, his car was there; but, were you ready to see him? You carried the flower arrangement you’d made him. Changing the story. Now it was you with yellow flowers, and with lavenders.

He didn’t open the door.

“Harrison.”

And he seemed angry. He probably hadn’t expected you there. He sighed, “I don’t think you should be here y/n.”

“But I should,” you said. “Let me... I need to explain it to him, I don’t care, look, the last time he didn’t talk to me, and look what happened.”

Haz shook his head. “He’s not here.” He tried to close the door.

“Haz I won’t buy that.” The flowers were heavy.

“I swear, he’s not here,” he continued. “Don’t know where he went.”

You looked at the car.

“Think he went out for a walk, you can check his room if you don’t believe it.”

You gulped. “I… can I drop this here, at least?”

Harrison stared at the flowers. “Yellow and lilac flowers?”

“Yes, please, Harrison, I really need to explain myself,” you said.

He hesitated, and you didn’t blame him. You knew Tom probably had told Haz what he’d read, and if someone had written something like that of Harry, you’d hate them too.

“Fine,” he eventually said and he took the flowers from you.

“And… I brought a box, too,” you said.

“I... I’ll help you with it,” Haz said with pity. You sighed as you headed to the car. You had a few pages too. An envelope. You didn’t even know why you were doing this.

“You.. you can come in,” Haz said. He offered you some water and you could tell he probably pitied your state, you looked like a mess.

“What’s that?” He asked.

“An explanation,” you said. “It’s got a script, and…” You gulped. “I don’t even know. I know he won’t see me.”

Haz nodded. “Yeah.”

“Have they...Talked? Harry and him?” You said. The worst you could think of this was rining a brother’s relationship. Especially their relationship.

Harrison sighed. “Everyone hates Tom right now.”

“And they shouldn’t,” you said.

Haz scrunched his nose as if he didn’t agree, not completely.

“Look,” Haz sighed. “I don’t think he’s to blame,” he started. “I…”

“Did he tell you about it?”

“Yeah,” he gulped. “And that was… You really fucked up, y/n, but I… I don’t know you that well, but I could tell you guys were in love… It’s no secret that you were in love with him, and look I understand, he hurt you, for a while but getting revenge?”

“It did start like that,” you confessed. “But, while it started like that I never… I never believed he’d love me, you know? I never fully believed that that’s maybe why I wrote some things because I was too scared, and in a way, I was conning myself, into tricking myself I would be getting revenge when in reality it was just me actually trying, you really think I would’ve slept with him in the first place if I didn’t initially have some kind of attraction? It was a script, sure, it was a story, but I think I was telling myself that just so I could enjoy it, you know? Because he’s…It’s him, I was making myself believe I didn’t love him because I always feared he’d break me again, and… and, before you say anything, I know, I know, it’s fucked up, and I’m not trying to justify myself, but I… That’s the Tom I knew, you know? The guy who’ll use my words as his weapon, which he... Technically did end up doing, I told him that I didn’t want to be lonely, and he said I deserved it. I wrote in that script that what I’d fear the most with him is that it was like last time, when he only pretended to love me, and he said it again, how he was pretending,” you gulped as you rested your face against your fist. “And maybe I did it because it was a way to shield myself?” You paused.

Haz was quiet.

“My heart was so broken that it built up walls around them, and I guess I wanted to give it another chance, because it’s him, it’s always him, no matter how bad he hurt me before I still wanted to give it a chance, and maybe that’s the script, the shield I’d use for myself, initially, to say that it was only for a story if he was the one to hurt me. To say that it was the only perfidy if he hurt me. But I didn’t want to hurt him,” you stared at the glass of water. “And I get it, I was building a weapon because I thought this was a war, and it shouldn’t have been one. He’s not an enemy. He is the guy I’ve been in love with my whole life.”

Harrison kept quiet, longer. Then he stared at the envelope. “Does it say that in there?”

“Yes, and a lot of things more,” you cleared your throat. “Because he… I understand he’s hurt but saying I’ve never loved him,” you bit your lip. “He can be mad at me for everything else, but saying I’ve never loved him, that’s just…”

“What about Harry?”

You bit your lip. “Why does it matter if I had feelings for Harry at some point?”

“He always knew Harry was in love with you,” He explained. “I… I know the reason behind everything.”

“There is a reason, then?” You scoffed.

“He knew it, and he knew that the worst thing he’s ever done is what he did to you,” Haz said. “And now I know. After that club night, right? When you were back from Rome, you started dating, and that night he broke your heart.”

“Yes,” you nodded. “And then he said he was only dating me as a prank, he said that he’d never date someone like me.”

“He did it because he always feared this, I’m not trying to justify him” he explained. “But he said it. How you were supposed to be in love with Harry, and how he was always watching you both, happily. But you always chose Tom.”

“I did.”

“But he feared you’d realize it one day, that you and Harry were… more suited for each other, and that Harry was the good guy, Harry was the nice guy, and so he, in his stupid attempt to make you fall in love with Harry, he kept pushing you away, and he felt guilty.”

“Why did he go to Rome, then?” You frowned. “None of that would’ve happened if he hadn’t gone to Rome.”

“I don’t know why he did,” Haz confessed. “But he felt guilty, because you had feelings for Harry, and he took it away, and he felt… guilty, because if he hadn’t gone to Rome, what would’ve happened with Harry?”

“But you can’t live with ‘what if’s,” you pushed. “And… even if… He hadn’t come... I don’t think Harry and I could ever..”

“How do you know that?” Harrison asked.

“Harrison.”

“Look, y/n, I’m just asking this to give you time to think for an answer, if Tom does talk to you, I know he’d ask this.”

You looked away. “I don’t know.”

“That’s what’s bothering Tom,” Harrison explained. “That he feels like he took away his brother's happiness.”

“And he did anyway, I’m not Harry’s happiness, it’s Emma, even after everything, it wouldn’t matter because Harry was supposed to marry Emma,” you frowned.

Haz nodded. “I know that. Harry is over you, but Tom… I think deep inside he did it because he wanted to give you and Harry a second chance.”

“That’s bullshit,” you snapped, then shook your head. “Sorry, this isn’t with you.”

“No, I know, and you’re right, but… I don’t think Tom came from a bad place, he’s willing to give you up.”

“But I love him,” you whimpered. “I love him, I love Tom and I… It’s him.”

Harrison sighed. “I know y/n, I’m just trying to make you understand it.”

You bit your lip. “I’m… I’m leaving.”

“Tom will soon be back from his walk, don’t you want to wait?” He asked.

“I need to… Process this, but please, make sure he reads it, and that he watches it,” you sighed. “No, wait…Can I go to his room?”

Haz hesitated again, closing his eyes. “I… Yeah, what for?”

You took out an old DVD from the envelope. “To put this on.”

You went to his room, you knew he still had an old DVD, for movies he knew weren’t on platforms, and you knew he liked the DVDs. His room felt cold, too. Messy. You could tell he wasn’t okay. You put the DVD on and paused it. You really hoped he’d press play when he was back. You left the box in his room and then left the envelope on his nightstand.

You said goodbye to Harrison and left to be alone with your thoughts again. The only thing you liked about loneliness was it gave you time to think, to process this. You could go to the park and not be bothered, and you could drive hours and hours, and nobody would call expecting you to go anywhere. It could give you some sense to bring answers, though the traffic lights never told you anything. No answers. Nobody would have the answer.

And you knew it, you wouldn’t get any answers, and you knew Tom probably wouldn’t forgive you, but at least you needed him to know. He deserved to know.

And you knew what would come, you’d be staring at windows, you’d write but you wouldn’t like it. You knew it, it was coming, what you feared the most. The nights wouldn’t come and if they did, you wouldn’t sleep. Faces would remind you of him but it would never be him again.

You saw it coming. Wanting to get rid of clothes you’d worn with him, and clothes he had taken off. Wanting a new skin because he’d kissed every spot, and the lipsticks because you’d stained his body with them. It was as if your body was full of scars, of tattoos of his kisses that were now removed. And now you couldn’t listen to those songs, you wouldn’t want to watch another movie with New York. You’d never buy the same wine again. Nothing.

You’d have to get rid of that perfume. And nothing made sense. And you’d have to pretend you were fine, because what would you win by letting the world you’d fucked up?

You had to start again.

You needed a new body , a new soul a new heart because this would hurt all the time. Your pride, your love, your feelings.

Because Tom had said you didn’t love him. Yes, you had played your own part in this. But it was too late now. Because he didn’t get it. Tom had forced you to find love somewhere else. Did he not see it? That you had been so broken that you had turned to the only light you had.

But then—what about Harry? Because you couldn’t say you never felt anything. And you couldn’t say that you hadn’t stopped yourself because you had feared you’d lose him. Because losing Harry, that you couldn’t afford.

But you were thinking about it, the ‘what if’. You couldn’t live there, not dwelling with the past.

Because with Harry it was too late, now. It had been for a while. And now he probably would be gone. And you didn’t have him there to hug you, to tell you all of this would be right. He wouldn’t be there now.

But there was someone else who deserved an explanation. You called him.

“I was going to ask why the hell you asked me here, but--” Harry had arrived at the park. And he wasn’t late, he had come. He had answered. He had come.

You were sitting at that park bench, you stood up as you saw him. He was a mess, too. Seemed like everyone was still recovering from the battle. You ran out of breath as you saw him, you didn’t know why your arms immediately wrapped around him in a hug, he hesitated but hugged you back, strongly.

He let you go.

“I’m sorry,” you said.

“Why am I here?” He asked.

“I needed to give you this,” you said as you took it out. The printed script.

He gulped, staring at it, knowing exactly what it was. “I need to—I need an explanation.”

You nodded. “You deserve one.”

He coughed. “Yes I fucking deserve a bloody explanation y/n,” he lamented, he walked away from you “I can’t—I didn’t even have feelings for you anymore.”

That was what you didn’t want to hear. He couldn’t have feelings for you again. “Harry I’m—”

“No, no, y/n, right now,” He took a deep breath. “You didn’t call. You didn’t call me, or Tom or… Nobody, I need you to listen to me right now, and then I need you to answer my questions because I can’t… God, I love Emma.”

That was a relief. He loved Emma.

“This was all so bloody happy, I was happy, I was okay, I was happy, but it was too good,” he closed his eyes and shook his head. “Too perfect. Wasn’t it?” He asked, to the sky, not to you. “I just couldn’t be this happy, too good to be true. Innit?” You saw him playing with his tongue, probably licking all his inner cheeks. “But I don’t—Y/N, I can’t—I can’t get married right now. Emma is not speaking to me,” he gulped. “I mean I haven’t really…”He sat on the bench where you had once sat.

A very nice park for the awful conversation you were having.

You didn’t know what to say now.

He rested his face against his hands, he was stressed. His foot kept tapping. “I…” He gulped as he looked up, then he avoided your gaze. “I spent my whole life loving you. All my life, I’ve—I’ve been there.”

This was the first time you’ve heard him say it. He had never said it before. Not what this meant.

“And look, I was bloody fine with you choosing Tom, okay?” He looked up at you. He blew his cheeks. “Every. Single. Bloody time,” he snorted. “And I had to suck up my feelings you know? Never say anything and then—” He licked his lips. “why is this happening? Why did you have to say it now?” He asked you, now staring at you. “Fuck, you didn’t even say it, that’s just it, makes it even worse, right?” He frowned. He let out a long, loud sigh. “You wanted to keep that, or maybe you didn’t, because... “ He looked down at the script. “You wrote it didn’t you, and it’d be out there for the world to know, and you’re giving it to me now, meaning that you want me to know.”

“I want to fix this, okay? I want to bloody fix this! I can’t—-lYou gulped. But he didn’t understand this. But maybe he was right, were you jeopardizing his happiness with this, too?

“I don’t even have feelings for you,” he stated. “But now I’ll always have that bloody thought in the back of my head, what would’ve happened? The fucking ‘what if’.”

“Harry. I know. I bloody know—But I cant fucking—“

“No, no, listen y/n. I—I did a lot of things for you, okay?” He closed his eyes. “I spent my entire life trying to—I don’t even know, I changed myself for you,” he pinched the bridge of his nose, he stood up and paced around the bench, then rested his hands against it. “I’ve loved you since we were kids,” he whispered. “And I had to see you—And it hurt,” he paused. “And it hurt so much, that I had to—I can’t—I couldn’t help it,” he shook his head. “I tried to stop my feelings and they were never gone,” he pursed his lips. “And I kept them to myself as I could, knowing that I’d rather never have you love me back than to lose you forever,” he admitted.

“You think I didn’t fear losing you, too? That’s why I’m here! Because I can’t afford losing you!” You didn’t know what to say to him, because it hurt. Because it hurt that you had hurt him. But you knew that every time that you had tried to love him, you’d go back to Tom, and you’d keep going back.

“And now—And you know, then along came Emma,” he smiled sadly. “And I didn’t have to do anything,” he explained. “I didn’t have to change, I didn’t have to beg for her love and I loved her,” he stood back up, crossing his arms. “And I love her truly and deeply, and—And now she believes I’ll give up everything for you,” he sounded exasperated. “And—And, I won’t… But there’s still that voice in my head saying I will. Why the hell do I think I’ll do that too?”

“Harry, no, Emma is the right choice, please,” you pleaded. “Let’s—Lets.”

“I know she is, and I don’t want to give her up, I don’t want to,” he ran a hand through his hair. “But there’s a part of me that knows I will always come back to you.”

“Harry,” you couldn’t say anything, no words were coming out. You couldn’t even know what to think of this. “You are supposed to be with Emma. This is—“

“But was Tom telling the truth? I—I—is it true?” He asked. “I don’t even know if it’s true.”

“What?” You were barely breathing now.

“Did you…” He closed his eyes. “Did ever have feelings for me? And tell me the truth I don’t want any more secrets.”

You didn’t answer right away. But he wanted the truth. “Yes, I did have feelings for you.”

He held his head. “Don’t say that!”

“You told me to—”

“But… Why? Don’t say that! Not when I was supposed to marry her—When I am supposed to marry her.”

“Well that’s what bloody happened! I’m not lying anymore! I don’t want to keep things because look where it fucking led—“

“And it’s not that I want to be with you,” he was talking faster now, nervously. “I got over you and it was—-So bloody hard at first,” he admitted. “Seeing you always crushing on Tom, always him which really—Why the hell do you love him when he—does that? He’s— awful.”

“Don’t say that! He’s not awful,” you quickly defended Tom. Not sure why, Tom wouldn’t care if you defended him. “This was on me.”

“But why--Fuck, why?” He plopped back on the bench. “No, but y/n, I just—I need a bigger explanation.”

“It’s— what I’m bloody trying to—You think I brought that script for nothing?”

He interrupted again. “You don’t understand y/n, how much it hurt and—to know you did have feelings for me.”

“And you think I—“

“But… But!” He sounded crazy now. “I know those feelings are long gone,” he said, and nodded to himself. “Well, mine are. And we wouldn’t work.”

“No we wouldn’t.”

You waited for him to keep talking, knowing he was venting, and knowing he needed to clear it out.

“I just need you to understand that this is—” He widened his eyes, and shook his head. “It’s… “ he blew a raspberry. “And I’m angry at you,” he said. “Because—It’s supposed to be Emma.” He said. “It’s not you. Even if I tried it for so long, it’s —supposed to be Emma. But you—you said I shouldn’t marry her.”

You closed your eyes. “I did but it’s… A different situation, I said that as your friend, okay?” You lied. “I thought you weren’t bloody ready, but—That didn’t mean, I don’t even know why I said it okay? I was too confused that fucking day! I had just slept with Tom, and you bloody say it? That you want to get married? It was insane, Harry!”

He stayed silent for a while, staring at the script in his hands, he played with the paper.

“Are you going to say anything?” You snapped.

“When did you have feelings for me?”

“Before Rome and—“

“And?”

“Before Rome.”

He bit his inner cheeks. “We never talked after that”

“I know.”

“Was there even a conversation to be had?” He scoffed.

“I don’t know,” you scowled. “but there is one now, you need to be happy—“

“I can’t live like this, y/n,” he closed his eyes. “The fucking ‘what if’.” He sighed as he stood up. He took the script and then started to walk away.

“Harry, no, wait—We are not done talking.” You followed after him, you couldn’t let him go away without an explanation.

But as he turned around, and before you could even continue saying anything, his hands had pulled your face and his lips hand landed on yours.

IF YOU’RE GOING TO SEND AN ASK PLEASE REFER TO THAT ENDING AS ‘WATERMELON’ let’s not spoil it for everyone else 🍉

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goth-girlfriend · 4 years

Note

okay, but mirio with a crush/friend that’s in 1a? like the reader is lowkey a bit more shy and quiet and everyone thinks their dating.

I SQUEALED, I LOVE IT 😭🥰

🤍🤍🤍💛💛💛💙💙💙💛💛💛🤍🤍🤍

The first you saw this boy, he was at the front of your class, smiling, and you made eye contact. Your eyes widened, and you forced your eyes closed gripping at your skirt and you ducked your head. The words leaving his mouth didn’t make it to you, but his laugh, it was more than enough to make you blush and avert your gaze to anything other than the boy in question. Now, being this way, wasn’t much different from how you usually acted. You completely collapsed on the sideline the moment his clothes fell off when he challenged your class, luckily your stoic friend to be questioned was there to help you stand up.

You didn’t dare approach the grounds where he took your class out one by one, you were amazed by his strength and the story he told you. Inspired really but, the shell you were in held you in tight and you weren’t exactly determined to break out, so like a starved man to a king crab, Mirio took a liking to your shy personality and wanted to help you the same way he’d helped his friend Amajiki. Slowly he approached you outside of class or in luck with a smile and wave, and sheepishly you’d wave and smiled with a whisper of a greeting back. It wants until one day you found him while taking out the trash.

*********

“Hey!” I screamed and fell back the bags of trash I was just hugging fell scattering on the floor as I struggled to breath normally looking at the wall to see the face or Mirio, “Sorry if I scared ya!” He stepped out I sighed.

“Oh, it’s fine,” I whispered looking down feeling heat spread to my cheeks I install felt vulnerable.

“Let me help you!” I watched as he picked up some of the bags I’d struggled to carry.

“Ah, thank you.” I nodded and stood up, he definitely still towered me, we walked in silence, I was a bit fidgety, until he spoke up.

“L/n?” I turned to see him staring at me already, I snapped my head away.

“Y-yeah?” I asked looking down at the floor.

“Let me walk you to class tomorrow, I’d like to get to know more about your quirk. You remind me of a friend and I think I know exactly how I can help you! But I don’t have much time so the morning are better if your free?” I blinked a few times, feeling the heat on my cheeks intenseify.

“I-uh,” you shook you head, “y-yeah, thatd be great.” You lied, honestly, you don’t how great this would be, Mirio Togata, a BOY, you struggled to talk to boys you didn’t like now him? Someone who you think you might fancy? ‘This is gonna be terrible if can’t get a word out!’

“Great! I’ll come by the dorms tomorrow and then we can head to breakfast!” He smield as we finally stoped and threw the bags into the large bins.

“Yeah,” I nodded with a smile, “I’ll see you then.”

“Don’t say bye now (l/n), I still have to walk you back to the dorms! What kind of hero would I be if I let a lady walk herself back in the dark.” He smiled brightly, and I felt like I should’ve shirked my eyes, the sun, he definitely shines brighter than the sun.

We made our way silently to the dorm buildings in silence, I fidgeted with my fingers and the hem of my skirt, I was dying both internally and externally. We stopped at the door and I sighed, and turned to Mirio, he smiled and I smiled, I HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING A THANK YOU AT LEAST DO IT NOW COWARD!

He turned to walk away and I screamed “Mirio!” He turned around a bir shocked looking, “Thank you for walking with me...” I whispered and could hardly manage to look up at him.

His face changed to a gentle smile, “No problem, I enjoyed our talk,” he gave a small wave, “I’ll see you in the morning (l/n).”

“Y/n,” I mumbled. “Hm?” He hummed, “Call me y/n.”

“Alright then y/n,” he faced me completely and tilted his head closing his eyes as he smiled, “I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning.”

I gave nod and a small awkward wave as he laughed and turned to leave, sadly I didn’t know I was being watched. I enetered and let out a heavy shaky breath, that was a lot of effort. I made it to my dorm door and was stopped by Minas Pink hand grabbing my wrist, “Tell me everything.”

***********

I got ready in the morning, having been kept up all night by Mina as she squeezed everything out of me, my feelings, what happened, what I was going to, what I was going to wear, I don’t exactly have much of choice considering it’s STILL a school uniform. I made my way down the building to the front door where Mina was standing with my bag.

“Don’t take your bag! Carry a book! If he’s a real gentleman he’ll offer to carry it! I’ll take your bag for you!” She shoved a my English book and notebook into my hands, I felt myself start to shake.

“Mina!” I whined, “It’s nothing! I promise!” I felt like crying.

“Just try it please! Entertain my ships, Kaminari isn’t doing to good with my plans pLEASE!” She begged.

“Okay,” I gave in quickly and took the books rushing out before she started crying.

I ran straight into Mirio, “so hard,” I mumbled feeling plastered against his chest. He hands touched my shoulder and moved me back a little, “Are you okay y/n?”

I flushed and looked down, “Oh! Yeah.” I mumbled, why did I say my first name yesterday?!

“Well let’s get going then!” We started to walk and it wasn’t long until it came, “Do you need help? You don’t look to comfortable carrying those!” He said and took my books befor I answered, “thank you, my bag, was... being held hostage so I ended up carrying my books this morning.”

He laughed and I smiled, “That’s a weird one.” I smield slightly feeling a bit comfortable.

The weeks passed slowly, every morning meeting with Mirio, he’d carry my books we’d eat breakfast and talk briefly about my quirk, and that lasted the first day, after that he just started talking to me the rest of the week telling me stories about himself during breakfast and the walk to class. I found myself smiling meow openly and being able to look at him, every now and then I still looked away and get flustered at just his bright smile. That wa sinful one day I bumped into someone while we walked to my class.

“Watch where your going idiot!” I stepped behind Mirio and held his hand with both of my knees weak and shaking.

“Mirio,” I whispered tears stinging my eyes as the guy got closer glaring at me as I moved further behind Mirio.

“Hey!” He smacked a hand on the shoulder of the guy, “We don’t wanna cause any trouble! I’m sorry my friend here bumped into you.” He smiled and the guy just scoffed.

“Whatever just make your girlfriend watches where she walks.” He turned and left and I sighed still squeezing his hand.

“Thanks Mirio.” I didn’t want to let go.

“No problem, now let’s get you to class, but you should watch where your going.” He said and brought his free hand to pay my head.

We got to class, my knees still a little weak, as he stood by the door, he waved at Midoriya and I didn’t let go of his hand, I clung, I couldn’t fight the feeling of comfort I got from holding his hand. He pulled me to the door, “Clas is starting soon you should get to your seat.”

He smiled and I nodded looking up at him, another cliche blush on my cheeks, “Right,” I nodded. “I’ll come by for lunch.” He called as he leaned into the classroom and disappeared. I felt the stares boring into me before Mina said it, “SO IS IT OFFICIAL?”

I tilted my head, “What?”

“You WERE HOLDING HIS HAND!” She shook me by the shoulders.

“It’s kinda obvious,” Denki shrugged in his seat, “What’s obvious?” I asked.

“That’s you two are dating dumbass.” My face went blank at Bakugo’s words.

“Dating?” I asked and looked at Mina, “YES!” She screamed.

“No, were not I j-” and class started.

***********

For the next two months I found myself being freed from the shell that held my captive, I smield more and laughed with Mirio, and my heart, always felt calm and content hearing his terribly cheesy jokes, but it didn’t change the fact that when it came to talking I was a mess, I couldn’t make eye contact and I speaking became more than just a chore.

But here we are, walking the trail behind the school around evening, “hey y/n, you’re a girl.”

“Mm, yes, I am.” I answered looking ahead at the sunset, “So how do girls like getting love confessions? In public? private? Letter? Out loud? Because there’s this girl, I didn’t know when, but I think I fell in love with her.” My heart sank, it’s probably Nejire... “We started off as friends, and I don’t know when but know when I talk to her it’s the highlight of my day, her smile, her laugh.” Definitely sounds like Nejire... “I don’t know how she does it but now I feel like if she leaves my life, it’ll be like the sun will never coming back up.”

“Oh, well,” I shrugged feeling a bit bitter, “Most girls like letters usually in private, something to keep, but honestly, even with the way I am, I’d love to get a vocal confession infront of someone, I feel like it shows their not afraid to say it or prove it.” I shrugged.

“Huh, that’s great advice,” he pat my head and smield, “I’ll keep that in mind.

***********

Another month passed and Mirio kept me company on the walks to school, class, lunch, breakfast, dorms and everywhere else he could squeeze in. The time we spent together started to add up and I can see why people thought we were dating especially my class that saw all of this happening, as this point I couldn’t deny it, I could but they wouldn’t believe me anyways. I sigehd day dreaming about what a love confession would feel coming from someone who genuinely meant it.

I tried to pay attention in class but I couldn’t, Midnight definitely caught on to this having called me out three times. Each time I was scolded and teased by Mina about day dreaming of my ‘boyfriend,’ sadly, I couldn’t say he was. I was deflated, defeated feeling when I watched him walk to my class with Nejire, beside him, “y/n! I hope you don’t mind Nejire is joining us!” He smield and I smield back feeling weak.

“No problem, the more the merrier right?” I lied.

We spent lunch eating, they talked and I just poked around at my food, I didn’t give much thought on the conversion until I noticed Mirio stepping into his chair and then the table. He smield and got everyone’s attention before he started, “I want everyone to know this!” He screamed.

“Right now, I’m about to tell the most beautiful girl in my eyes that I love her I want everyone to know that I’m not afraid or ashamed to do it!” He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket, Nejire looked up at him stars in her eyes. I sulked looked down at my food, feeling a familiar sting in my nose.

“Every morning I wake up and the first thing I do is think about your smile, and your laugh, you always seem full of life and I love that about you. The way fidget when your anxious and the way you cling to me when your anxious or nervous always make me feel like I could be so much better than hero. Our endless conversations and the time we’ve spent together never leave me. When I always feel like I’m at my lowest or to the point of defeat I remember your smile and encouraging words and I know I have so much more to fight for. I love the way you smile, the way your eyes shine when you let the passion flow. This might be embarrassing especially infront of everyone here but I wouldn’t do it any other way, I want everyone to know how much I love you, and care for you, so,” he paused, “Nejire,” I felt the tears drop and looked straight down, I heard Mina gasping and then curing along with a few recognizable mumbles from my class mates.

“Please move so I can’t get to y/n.” I got whiplash form how fast I looked up at him, he saw the tears in my eyes his face softened, he whispered a she jumped down, “y/n?” He took my face in his hands thumbs wiping the tears, “Will you be my girlfriend.”

I smield as tears feel and his eyes widened, “Mirio,” a shaky breath, “Id love to.” He smield and crushed me in a hug, I hugged his chest and felt him kiss the top of my head.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, “you can cry if you want to, I’ll be here for you always.” He rubbed my back and I just smiled against his chest letting the tears fall.

“I don’t know when I fell for you, but I know, I’d never change it.” He whispered.

“I love you,” I mumbled, “and your cheesy jokes.”

He laughed and I could feel smield as he squeezed a bit harder, “good because I never run out.”

💛💙💙🤍🤍💛💛💙💛💛🤍🤍💙💙💛

I hope you like it 🖤

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pinkpetalwaterimagine · 3 years

Text

Three cute ghosts

First imagine ever, I accidentally deleted my previous account, so I’m starting a new one here. Anyway, hope you like it, and don’t hesitate to point any mistake. (I’m French, so sorry in advance)

Summary : Luke is mean to you, but not for long.

Word count : 2,5 k

You’ve lived forever in the same neighborhood and easily created a bond with the neighbors. Your neighbors are Julie Molina and her family. You were good friends, and you helped her during through everything. From the death of her mom, to her discovery of three cute ghosts friends. You heard her scream one night and the next morning you were asking her what happened. Even though you considered you were friends you still respected the social boundaries.

« What happened last night ? I heard you scream. » you asked when you saw her at school.

« Oh it was nothing, I mean it was a … spider. Yeah, right, those spiders always here when you don’t want to. » she answered unsure of herself.

You doubted what she said, nevertheless, you let it slide, if she wanted to talk about it she would come your way.

The day passed without a hitch and Julie and you decided to go study to her house.

« Go ahead, I’m just going to make some snacks for while we study » said Julie while you climbed the stairs to her room.

You opened the door and saw three cute guys roaming around her room. The four of you stared as each other, not a word coming from neither one of you.

Then, the brunette one finally said something : « I think she can see us » he said in a whisper.

« Oh really ? And what gave it away ? » sarcasm dripping from the blond guy.

« Uhhhhh Julie, could you come here for a sec ? Like real quick ? » you yelled towards the door without leaving out of sight the three guys.

They were in circle, whispering between them. Julie alerted by your yelling was in her room in no time. « Why is there three cute guys in your room? » you asked. « She thinks we’re cute. » you blushed at those words, but damn right they were cute. Julie gave a disapproving look to the boy who just talked. « You can see them?! » She exclaimed.

You thought that she was really becoming weird, why wouldn’t you be able to see them ?

« Yeah, i don’t understand what’s the issue here ? »

« Well, we’re ghosts. » said the boy that hadn’t talk until now.

Silence in the room, no one was talking, or breathing for a matter of fact.

« Yeah, right, okay I’m out of here. » you took your stuff, ready to go back to your place. You looked at Julie for any confirmation or whatever. You didn’t even knew what you were looking for, but it was definitely not this kind of explanation.

« Wait Y/N ! - she stopped for a second- it’s the truth, they are ghosts »

You couldn’t believe what she was saying right now ! You stepped towards the door.

« I’m serious, please come here ! Just let me show you or prove it to you ! » she said, a pleading look in her eyes.

You decided to hear her until the end of her demonstration. « just try to touch one of them, you’ll see ! » she encouraged you.

You went to grab the blonde’s shoulder, but your hand went through. « What the hell is happening here ?! » you started to freak out. « Why can’t I, why is he ? What …? »

« I think she’s panicking » said the one that you supposed was the funny guy of the group.

« Y/N meet Reggie, Alex and Luke. » they all gave you nod as Julie said their names.

———————————————

As time flew, it has already been two months since you have met the boys, and this discovery that only you and Julie could see the boys has brought you closer with Julie but not only. You were spending all your free time in the garage wether it was doing your homework or just chilling in « Luke’s couch » with the boys. You started to really be like family to them and they were just as much for you.

Your relationship with Luke, though, was different than with the other boys, you felt like he was always trying to not tell too much, to not let you enter into his world (even if it was impossible for some obvious reasons). He seemed to not want your company. You were sad about it because you knew that it could be really fun to be around, you saw how he interacted with the boys and Julie, how much of a sunshine he could be, but sadly not to you.

You thought that he didn’t like you and he did not wanted you as a friend. You stopped trying to get his attention, or paying attention to him. It was painful for you, but if he didn’t care you weren’t one to wallow in self-pity because a guy wasn’t friendly. You didn’t look into his (beautiful, big, dead) eyes from now on. When he was around you didn’t want to annoy him more than he seemed to already be. When he was around your persona changed a bit and everyone could see that.

As you were lying on the floor, you felt someone laying by your side. You opened your eyes to find Alex joining you on the floor of the garage. You were really closed to Alex, he was the one with the « softer touch » and you could tell him everything.

« So what is happening to you right now ? You don’t seem like yourself nowadays » he started off.

You were a bit taken a back, you did not know that they noticed the change when Luke was around. You did not wanted them to know that it was affecting you.

« Nothing, everything is … great » you said the last part in a whisper.

« Yeah because you seem like it. », you could never lie to Alex, he always has seen right through you.

« It is just that … » you were interrupted by the whole gang walking in the studio. Saving you from things you didn’t wanted to admit, even to Alex.

You got up and packed your things : « I have to back, bye guys » you waved and kiss Julie on the cheek before leaving.

Because of the tense atmosphere you tried spending less time at the Molina’s house, mostly to avoid a certain beanie’s fan ghost. You stayed more in school and actually tried new club because why not. It is in writing class that you actually met Peter. He was really cute and nice to you, you hang together and started to become really close friends. Julie saw that this new friend made you really happy and she was absolutely and unconditionally supportive of the two of you.

You were still hanging around the studio to support your friends, and Luke being cold to you was not such an issue anymore. You knew that you had great friends and if he did not wanted to be a part of it then suit him.

As you were sitting on the couch listening to the band rehearse, you were smiling down at your phone because of Peter’s text. He was such a great friend, always sending you gif or cute pictures.

« C’mon Y/N ! Be a little more focused, we need your truthful opinion, and here you are smiling at this little box ! » exclaimed Alex.

« We could have played Home is Where my horse is you wouldn’t even have noticed » added Reggie. The three other members gave him a dirty look.

« You know I would love to hear the song » you said trying to change the topic of the conversation.

« That’s besides the point, Y/N, and you know it. Was it Peter ? » asked Julie. She knew you too well.

« Who’s Peter ? »

You couldn’t believe it, Luke did not ever cared about your life or what you were doing, but there he was asking about the only boy in your life. And Peter is a friend nothing more you knew that.

« He’s a good friend » you answered shortly. « okay, I have to run, bye guys. You killed it one more time. »

You left quickly. As you were standing in the Molina’s driveway you realized you forgot your bag. You went back to the studio to pick it up. You heard the guys talked, you did not mean to eavesdrop but you were a little bit curious of what they were talking about when it’s just the three of them.

« I know what this is about. You’re jealous of all the attention Peter is getting. » you recognized Alex voice. But to who was he talking ? Who could be jealous about your friendship with Peter ? They don’t even know the guy for crying out loud.

« Especially from Y/N. » added Reggie.

Oh. So they were talking to Luke. About you. What in the world is happening now.

« Please. You think I care if Y/N gives another guy a little attention? How insecure do you think I am ? » you heard Luke’s voice, a little bit higher than ordinary.

The three boys stayed in silence for a few seconds.

« Seriously, how insecure do you think I am ? » exclaimed Luke in annoyance.

« Bro, dont get mad. It’s just that we know you and we don’t understand why you are acting like she is yours when you have never said more than five sentences in a row to her. Just imagine how she is feeling, if we don’t understand, how could she ? » Wise words spoken by Alex.

You thought it was the best moment to enter the room like you did not hear what they said. You did not even know what was that all about. Luke is jealous ? And like Alex said, he never spoke to you and yet he pulled the jealous card.

You picked up the bag from the floor as they stared at you with wide eyes and left without saying anything left.

« Do you think she heard us ? » asked Reggie.

« Nah. Nahhhh… she would have said something right ? » enquires Luke.

« I think you should ask Julie, I mean they are friends, she knows probably more than we do. »

A week later you found the strength to go support the band during rehearsals. As you stepped in the garage, you were faced with Luke adorning a bright smile.

« Hi Y/N ! » he said with a cheerful voice.

Once again, you were gobsmacked. What happened during the week you didn’t see them ?

« Uhh, hi ? »

Luke saw the bewilderment on Y/N’s face and thought about his conversation earlier this week with Julie. He didn’t know how to approach her and ask questions about Y/N.

« Uhm, Julie. I was wondering, if by any luck, you know why Y/N is coming less to the studio ? » he just finished his sentence and Julie was already looking at him like she was ready to jump on him and hit him.

« Are you kidding me ? She’s coming less and less because you are not really the most welcoming person around here. She feels like when she’s here and you are as well, like she is a burden because you never talked to her and you just brush under the carpet everything she tries to say. » she said without taking a breath.

It hit Luke, since the first day in Julie’s room when he saw her, he knew that if he let enter his world they would be both hurt. But by rejecting her he did the same, even worse.

« So we wanted to play to you our new song and then we could do movie night ? » Luke suggested with his puppy dog’s eyes.

You were a bit taken aback to say the least but nonetheless you smiled at him and nodded to his proposition.

« We’re Julie and the phantoms and this is bright » Luke begin as if he was at a real gig.

« Tell your friends !» Added Reggie.

The performance was on fire. They all played their hearts out and it was just breathtaking. They let go of their instruments and all of them piled up on the couch for love night. You were at the far end of the couch, squeezed between the armrest and Luke’s huge biceps. They decided to watch high school musical 3, aka the best movie in the whole world. You sang every song so does Julie. And Luke kept watching you as you were dancing and singing.

« What ? » you asked him a little embarrassed, cheeks red and a small smile on your face.

« Nothing, you’re just cute » he blurred out. Everyone suddenly stayed still, and your cheeks reddened at his words.

You just took your spot on the couch and try to forget he said that.

Movie night definitely was the turnaround in Luke and your’s relationship. He was more friendly, always trying to make you laugh, always trying to see your smile. But what he enjoyed the most was seeing you blush. He would always make a comment about how cute you were, about how nice and pretty you were and so on. The other members could not take it anymore.

« When are you going to tell her that you liked her ?! We are sick of seeing you flirt with each other. » complained Alex. Luke didn’t even respond, he just smiled looking down at his shoes with a soft blush.

« I don’t know man, I mean it all seems complicated. I mean she’s her and I’m, well a ghost »

« I did not take you for a quitter. » Julie chimed in. « Luke you like her and she obviously feel something for you ! You just have to tell her »

You were at your house working on your calculus homework when you just received a text from Julie : « 911, need you asap, meet me in the garage. »

You let your calculus book on your desk and almost run to the house next to yours. As you enter the garage you did’t see anyone. Was it a joke ?

And then, you saw Luke, in his famous tank top, his arms popping out, his hair under the orange beanie that you liked so much.

« Julie sent me a text, is there an emergency ? » you asked after having finish drooling over Luke.

« Y/N, umm, I need to say something to you, and it’s not simple, and I’m really nervous. I mean what if the others were wrong and what if it changes everything ? »

« Luke, calm down, you’re rambling, I don’t understand a word you say. »

« I just wanted to say that I like you Y/N. Like like you like you. I know it might be a little complicated between us ».

You didn’t let him finish and took him in your arms. Wait ? In your arms.

« You, you can touch me, what is that ? »

The shock pass and you decided to make him more shocked. You pushed your lips to his. They felt warm against yours (who would’ve thought). Your lips and his moved in sync seeming to not having enough of each other.

« Ewwww, you guys could do that somewhere private »

You snapped out of your trance and saw Alex, Reggie and Julie looking at you shocked.

« Wait you can touch him? » Julie exclaimed.

She extended her hand to Alex and she did not go through him. Almost instantly everyone formed a group hug so happy to be able to add this « power » to their relationships.

The group tumbled on the floor. You were crushed by Reggie bod, yourself crushed on luke’s body.

« Hey there » he said in a whisper, looking in your eyes.

You tilted your head and kissed him what’s again.

« O C’mon guys ! Please! »

You laughed, burying your head in the scruff of his neck.

#jatp #jatp fanfic #luke imagine #luke patterson #julie and the phantoms #luke x reader #luke x y/n #luke patterson imagine

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galaxyofmyown · 4 years

Note

could u do a fic where reader is scared that hotch is cheating on them and hotch learns that its bc their past partners had cheated?

anon, i think i may scream. not because of your request (it is lovely and original and i like it). but i think my brain is bye-bye GONE. this took me like four days to write for literally no reason. so i’m writing this note to apologize in advance for errors or literally just bad writing. brain-machine say no. but PLEASE! feel free to send another request and i promise i will craft it as the gods crafted man (well, i’ll try). AHHHHHH. i hope you enjoy anyways!! :))))))

NOTE: I FINALLY MADE IT GENDER-NEUTRAL THOUGH AHAHAHA

aaron hotchner x reader - i know not

“Hey, baby,” Hotch says over the phone. It’s almost midnight and you’re alone in your bed once again.

“Hey, Aaron. How’s the case going?” You ask. You’re curled up under your clean sheets, freshly showered and in your favorite sleep clothes. But for some reason, you don’t feel comfortable at all.

“It’s… coming along. I should be home in a day or two.” He says. He sounds genuinely tired, and you trust this man with all of you, or at least you try to. Sometimes, though, you can’t help but get paranoid, the darker memories creeping in, clouding your vision.

“Okay. I love you.” You say softly.

“I love you more. And I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize. I understand.”

“You are extraordinary, (Y/N).”

“Ditto, Agent. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight. Love you.” He says again, easing your worry.

“Love you too. Stay safe.”

You plug in your phone and set it on your bedside table. Your room is lit only by one small lamp, and you stare at your ceiling. Your mind wanders even though you did not give it permission to do that. Usually, Hotch asks you to watch Jack part-time when he’s on a case, but in the last couple instances he assured you that Jessica could take care of him. It was probably nothing, but you couldn’t help but jump to a worst-case scenario. Were you getting cheated on again? Or was he about to break up with you?

No. Bad (Y/N). Stop.

But he was always so annoyingly vague about his cases. What if, and we’re just spitballing here, what if he isn’t even on a case when he says he is? What if he finishes the case, and rather than going home to you, he goes to some other person’s house?

You sit up in bed, suddenly wide awake. You know you’re being ridiculous, but you can’t help it. Aaron is a great guy. He loves you. He wouldn’t even cheat if he didn’t love you. He wouldn’t do that to anyone. You’re reaching for your phone before you can convince yourself not too.

“Hello?”

Just hearing Hotch’s voice makes you feel better.

“Hi. Sorry. I didn’t mean to call you.” You say.

“Are you sure? Is something wrong?” He asks, and his concern makes you want to laugh and cry at the same time.

“No, everything’s fine. Sorry again. Goodnight.” You hang up before he can probe more.

You sigh and walk to the kitchen to get a snack. You don’t think you’ll be getting much sleep tonight.

---

You wake up at 7:30 the next morning for work, your eyelids drooping and feet dragging. You make coffee in your biggest travel mug before heading out. Your day at the publishing house is slow and you think it’s a miracle it ends at all. You check your phone as you’re leaving the building and you see a text from Hotch.

Agent: Hey (Y/N). I’ll be home tonight around 8. Want to come over? Jack will be home and I know he misses you as much as I do.

You smile like an idiot and quickly respond that you’ll be there on the dot. You’re walking to your parking space when a familiar silver sedan passes you.

“I know not.” You say, your suspicions confirmed by the familiar license plate. You rush to your car before you start crying in the middle of the parking lot.

Why else would he lie to you and pretend he wasn’t back yet? Was he going to his place to meet someone right now? You start your car and pull out of the lot before you lose your nerve. You don’t know what you’ll say, but you have to confront him. You had your suspicions in your last relationship, but you ignored them. The only good that did was give you four more months of ignorant bliss before you realized you were being cheated on yet again.

You’re shaking by the time you pull up to his apartment building. You climb the stairs with the nervous anticipation you used to get as a kid when you had to get a shot. You have a moment's pause before you reach the door, your knock strong despite the weakness in your knees.

Hotch is still in his suit when he opens the door, but his tie is loose and his jacket is wrinkled.

“(Y/N). Wh-what are you doing here?” He asks, looking more confused than anything else.

“What are you doing here? You said you wouldn’t be back for hours. What am I supposed to think when you drive by me in your car when you’re meant to be four states over?”

Hotch still hasn’t opened the door enough for you to see inside, which all but confirms your worst fears.

“(Y/N), I can explain what-”

“Hotch,” You can’t call him Aaron right now, “Just tell me. Is there someone else?” You say, voice breaking. Aaron’s face can’t hide his emotions. His eyebrows furrow and he tilts his head up at you in that condescending way you hate.

“(Y/N). No. Why would you think that?” He says, but his voice isn’t reassuring. If anything, it’s angry.

“Can you blame me for feeling a little insecure, Hotch? You’ve been home three days out of the last two weeks. You don’t want me watching Jack in your apartment all of a sudden. You lie about whether or not you’re home? Is this the first time you came home without telling me, or is this something you’ve been doing. Do you laugh when I believe you?” You’re lashing out and you know it, but you can’t help the way your voice rises as you let out all of your pent-up feelings.

Hotch is silent, staring intently at your face. You know his profiling look, and this isn’t it. This is his boyfriend look. He’s concerned, but guarded, analyzing his best move. The amazing thing about Hotch, the thing you love about Hotch, is that he’s always determining the best move that will make you happy.

After a moment of tense quiet, he sighs in resignation and opens the door all the way.

His apartment is a mess. Clothes everywhere, dishes stacked in and around his sink, overflowing trash bags strewn about.

“Oh,” you say, tilting your head and willing yourself not to pass judgment, “hmm.”

Hotch looks sheepish.

“I, I’ve been having a tough couple of weeks. That’s why I lied about when I was getting back. I wanted some time to clean.” He says.

“You could’ve just told me.” You point out, and he nods.

“I know, I know, and I should have. I don’t know what I’m so afraid of. It’s just the thought of you thinking of me as weak…” He trails off, and your anger dissipates.

“Aaron, baby,” You say, taking his face in your hands, “I love you. I know who you are. You’re the strongest man I know. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t come to me for help. I would do anything for you.” You whisper your last statement, and yet it still carries the most force. Hotch leans into your touch.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N). I love you,” He pauses, at a loss for words, “I love you.”

You huff out a laugh.

“You already said that.”

“It wasn’t enough.”

You hug him, and he melts into your arms.

“I could’ve watched Jack at my place, you know. It doesn’t bother me at all.” You say, leading him over to the couch (and clearing off some clothes as you do so.). He rests his head in your lap.

“I didn’t want to ask that of you. You work a full-time job, and I know you didn’t sign up for being his babysitter-”

“Hey. No. When I started seeing you Jack became just as important part of my life as you are. I would drop everything for both of you.”

You notice Hotch’s eyes are getting red, and you stroke your hand through his hair.

“I adore you, (Y/N). You are absolutely amazing. And sometimes the thought of you leaving is so scary that I shut down.” He says.

“I get it. I just want you to know I’m all in.”

“I know you are. I am too.”

Both of you just sit there for a moment, basking in one another’s company.

“Speaking of scared,” you begin to say, and Hotch sits up to look at you, “I’m sorry I accused you of… you know, cheating.” You’re ashamed.

“I’m not mad. I’m sorry I was rude to you. I don’t blame you for not trusting me with how I’ve been acting lately.” He says, and you sigh in relief.

“Thank you. I’ve just had bad experiences, so it’s hard sometimes to not get worried.”

“Bad experiences? What do you mean?” Hotch asks, protective mode activated.

“My last three boyfriends all cheated on me.” You say quietly. Hotch stands up and paces back and forth past the coffee table a few times.

“Aaron?” You ask carefully. He stops when he hears your voice and the tenseness of his shoulders seems to melt away.

“Sorry, sorry,” he says, returning to the couch, “how could anyone do that to you?” He asks, taking your hands in his. You don’t know how to respond, so he kisses your forehead.

“Listen to me,” he murmurs, “I would never, ever, in a million years do anything to hurt you like that. Never. You are my world.” He says. You nod, fighting back tears.

“I love you so much.” You say because it’s never enough.

“I love you more.” He responds. You shake your head. Impossible.

“Get up, then.” You say, hopping off the couch.

“Why?” He asks but gets up anyway.

“We’re cleaning. Both of us. And then we’re picking Jack up. Both of us. And then we’re making dinner. Both of us. Got it?”

Hotch smiles and picks up a trash bag.

“Got it.”

#criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #ssa hotchner #hotch #hotch x reader #hotch imagine

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jaegercentral · 3 years

Text

⠀⠀⠀ “PROLOGUE”

selene set her phone down on the bathroom sink, rubbing her face (hands washed ofc). this is really happening, huh? she thought. walking out of the bathroom, she cleared her throat which was previously worn out from crying. selene, with her test in hand, sat on the couch, waiting and waiting and waiting for haru to come home from work. the time was 8:28PM and she had nearly fallen asleep until she heard the quiet unlocking of the front door. selene sat up and saw her boyfriend walk in, paper grocery bags in hand. “little help here?” he chuckled, seeing her focused gaze.

he snapped in front of her face to get her attention and she shuddered, nodding harshly. “yeah, of course.”

he rolled his eyes at her in a teasing way. she was always a little dazed. he found it cute.

he then looked down at the coffee table, seeing a little rectangle box wrapped in pink wrapping paper. “what’s this?” he reached to pick it up but she got to it faster. haru looked up at his beloved girlfriend and frowned. “hey? what is it?”

“it’s nothing!” selene pressed her lips together. “okay fine it’s a pregnancy test.” haru’s eyes widened to the size of an american quarter and he smiled softly.

“are you pregnant?” she nodded and he set down the groceries, pulling her into a hug, stroking her long black hair.

“what are we going to do, haru? aren’t we too young to start a family?” she sobbed into his shoulder and he patted her back.

“well, we can talk about that after i make dinner. is that good with you?” selene sniffled and mumbled a quiet ‘yes’. haru grinned and ruffled her hair. selene sat down at their small dinner table. soon they would have to add another chair. “okay. how about..i make your favorite dish?” he made jazz hands, waiting for her reaction—at least a smile.

selene looked up at him and tears filled her eyes again. the smaller man rushed over to her, pulling her into his embrace. “no no no, don’t cry. you’re okay, baby.”

haru helped her stand up, leading her over to the couch. “i’m scared, haru.” she curled up into a ball, feeling comfort in the way his arms were wrapped around her. he was her home.

“i know, i know.” he caressed her hair, kissing the crown of her head. the young couple sat still for a while, holding each other. selene stopped crying but only because haru started.

“no, you can’t start crying too! that’s my thing!” she huffed, wiping his tears.

the boy suddenly started laughing, which shocked selene. “and laughing is my thing.” she giggled and kissed the tip of his nose.

selene pressed down on her thighs and finally stood up. reaching for his hand, she sighed. “okay, let’s do this.”

haru took the girl’s hand and stood up with her. “what? make dinner?” she punched his shoulder and he feigned hurt.

“you know what i meant.” the girl rolled her eyes and yanked him towards the kitchen where they spent the next 45 minutes fixing a meal.

*six months later*

“i don’t know, tora. he’s just been pretty distant lately.” selene rested her hand on her stomach, where her bump had grown even larger.

“do you think he could be planning something? that’s why he’s been extra busy?”

“i guess? there isn’t much that kindergartners do so i don’t think he’s too busy with work.” her best friend snorted, finding her retort kinda hilarious.

“oh, well i have to go, selene. kou just texted me, asking where his phone was. ttyl!”

“yeah, thanks! bye.” she hung up, sighing heavily. selene looked down at her bump. “you’re a real pain, y’know.” she poked at it like it was some kind of jelly.

the front door of their apartment opened harshly, and selene flinched. their apartment doors were always so loud. we should probably get that fixed, she reminded herself. there stood her boyfriend, arms full of bags of candy. halloween was always his favorite holiday. selene smiled at the dorky boy who was still struggling to reach the marble island.

“i’ll get it.” she spoke, arms stretched out to reach for a bag. haru turned away from her, trying to keep her from doing any heavy lifting. “hey! let me help you!” haru thought she looked like an angry penguin when she stomped towards him.

“no! the doctor said you can’t do any heavy lifting until after you give birth!” he had set the bags on the island and selene looked at him like he was prey. her hands gripped onto the counter; she was ready to lunge at him. haru’s face as she chased him was priceless. it was a weird mixture of worry, fear, and joy. “oh shit!” he exclaimed, losing his balance as he tripped over one of the shoes she threw at him.

“i don’t care what the doctor said. i’m helping. besides, from the looks of it, the candy can’t be THAT heavy.” she tried reasoning, but when she lifted the variety bag, it tore open and spilled all over the kitchen floor. “well i guess it can, huh?”

haru, with a hand on his hip, gave selene an ‘i told you so’ look.

“you look a lot like your mother right now.” selene pointed out, painfully bending over to pick up a hershey bar that fell seconds ago.

“now that’s just sad. and wrong. she’s all old and wrinkly now.”

selene’s face went 😟 as she saw the small figure behind her boyfriend. with a mouth full of chocolate, she spoke, “babe you should shut up right about now.”

“no! i still have more to say.” selene glared him down, nearly making the poor man pee his pants. like his mother once said, if you value your life, never make a pregnant woman mad.

“who’s old and wrinkly, haruto?” his face suddenly lost all color as he heard the familiar, sickly, sweet voice from behind him. “and do tell me what else you had to say. we’ll be around for dinner so you have time.”

“oh it’s nothing.” the boy rubbed the back of his nape, a scare smile painting his face.

“right, mhm.” haru’s parents practically adopted selene after they started dating since hers were absent for most of her life. for people who are supposed to be parents, they sure stopped caring about selene after the wife finally got pregnant. “selene, darling, how are you? is the baby healthy? how many months along are you?” the aforementioned girl blinked harshly, trying to process what she asked.

“um, i’m good, so is the baby. and as of three weeks ago, i’m six months.” haru’s mom walked up to her, tucking her hair being her ears.

“poor girl. you must be in so much pain. plus, my little dweeb of a son must be making it worse.”

“oh, so much.” selene exaggerated, watching as haru frowned. he knew she was joking, but it still hurt him. he could be doing so much more for his girlfriend, but no. he’s been spending so much time trying to plan the perfect day to propose to her that he didn’t take the time to understand how she must’ve been feeling. horrible and lonely, he would’ve guessed.

“anyway, are you guys ready to go? i think it’s almost an hour until the reservation is actually valid.”

“i am, but i don’t know about haru.”

haru feigned an offended look, his hand pressed against his chest. “are you kidding me? i went to the grocery store in this suit.”

“well, haruto, don’t you know that that can cause creases and wrinkles?” his father asked, checking his watch.

her boyfriend shrugged, running his hands through his hair. “i do, but i just wanted to be extra prepared.”

“now that that’s settled, why don’t we head out?” selene offered, haru handing her her shoulder purse.

they all agreed, following after selene while haru locked up.

*45 minutes later*

as the clock hit 6:47, the group pulled into the restaurant’s parking lot, exiting the car. they were seated at a small round table, with a waitress named harlowe.

minutes passed by, they ordered, they ate, and then they left. it was now 8PM and fatigue was starting to take over selene. they waited by the entrance for their car to be driven back to them. while waiting, haru’s anxiety was kicking in. right now. do it. right. now. haru kneeled down and selene raised a brow. “are you tricking me again?”

haru shushed the girl and looked down, rethinking his words. “selene, i’ve known you for six years now and i think this has been long overdue. i’ve known you were the one for me since the moment you walked into the gym, bumping into the door, announcing your role as a new manager. and i’ve loved you ever since.” people were starting to crowd around the couple and normally, selene would’ve been scared out of her mind, but now she didn’t care because she was finally having her main character moment. “now here’s the scary part,” her boyfriend whispered. “miyasaki selene, will you be the roxanne to my max? my forever and always? will you marry me?” selene giggled at his “a goofy movie” reference and eagerly nodded, grinning like a child at disney world.

haru smiled with her, pulling her into a bear hug. he wiped her tears that were unbeknownst to her and declared his love to her as he slipped the peridot ring on her finger. “you remembered?”

“i remembered.” back when they were in high school, selene begged him that when, not if, they got engaged, he would give her a peridot ring instead of a diamond ring. she always believed that worth was subjective and haru knew how much she loved her birthstone, so he got the ring custom made.

“you’re perfect.” she exclaimed, basking in the attention they were receiving from the bystanders.

*three months later*

“haru, you asshole! if you don’t show up within the next 10 minutes, i’m divorcing you.”

“don’t worry, babe. i’m right around the corner!”

“don’t ‘babe’ me, just show up!” she violently screamed into her phone. the bloodlust was practically oozing out of her and if her fiancé didn’t walk faster than 2mph, she would make sure that he would never see the child that she was on the verge of giving birth to.

the door slammed open, and there stood her fiancé. it felt like déjà vù but selene was NOT in the mood. she just wanted the pain of being in labor to end.

after around 27 minutes of pushing, screaming, and selene cursing her fiancé in her head, the baby popped out of her. “it’s a boy!” the overly cheerful doctor exclaimed.

“well no shit, we saw in the ultrasound.” selene retorted, finally able to breathe again.

“i apologize for her.” haru smiled at the doctor who looked like she was about to start crying. as soon as they cut the umbilical cord and did whatever they do to newborns, they gave selene her baby, afraid she was going to snap at them again.

selene and her boys slept on that very hospital bed for the night, relieved. her baby was healthy and the love of her life was there to see. he was definitely happy that selene wouldn’t divorce him. they weren’t even married yet!

*two months later*

“bye, haru!”

selene kissed him on the cheek and haru kissed her and hikaru back. “bye, selene! bye, hikaru!” he waved and closed the door, going off to the school.

“why don’t we go on a walk to the park? well, i’ll be walking and hauling your cute little ass around, but it’ll be fun!” she claimed, clapping her hands together.

selene gathered all of hikaru’s baby food, diapers, clothing etc. and put it in the baby bag in his fancy, new stroller that his grandparents bought him. changing into some leggings and a graphic tee, selene and hikaru left the apartment, and went off to the park.

it was half way into their walk that selene received a call from an unknown number. “hello?”

“hi, we are here to inform you that your fiancé has been involved in a car accident, caused by a drunk driver.” selene covered her mouth, tears streaming down her face like a waterfall. seeing his mother cry, hikaru started wailing loudly. “ma’am? are you there?”

the, now, widowed mother regained her composure. “may i ask which hospital he’s at?”

“highland hospital, miss.”

“thank you, have a nice day.” selene placed her phone back in her pocket and sprinted in the direction of her car.

[at the hospital]

selene, holding hikaru on her hip, paced back and forth around the room, waiting for news.

suddenly the door opened, revealing the man’s parents. their eyes watered at the sight and his mother ran over to embrace the poor girl. his father took a seat at the bench and sobbed quietly into his hands.

haru’s right arm and leg were severely broken and he would’ve definitely been required to have surgery. across his face and shoulder were extremely long wounds that were still bleeding. he didn’t look like your fiancé anymore.

hikaru was still confused about what was going on, for he was looking around the room, watery eyed, for his father. he couldn’t recognize the man on the bed, which added to the sadness.

within a fraction of a second, the machine that was taking and recording his vitals started beeping and doctors started rushing in, pushing everyone else out. now, there she was. sitting outside of the icu room, she hugged hikaru tightly and prayed to whichever god was present to save her fiancé. she couldn’t lose him. not yet.

but death is natural. and although it takes some too early or too late, for the right or wrong reasons, it’s still natural and destined to happen some day.

and that’s when she received the news. “miss, we’re sorry to inform you that the patient has unfortunately passed away. we give our condolences.” suddenly, every single noise in the hospital drowned out and everything went black.

“hey! we need a doctor over here. my daughter-in-law has collapsed!” was the last thing she heard before losing consciousness.

*a day later*

the light was blinding and coming back way too fast for selene’s liking. she searched the room for her family. not even hikaru was present. only the doctor. “w-what happened?”

“oh, good. you’re awake. apparently, you went into shock and collapsed in the middle of the hallway after hearing the news of your fiancé dying.” she was suddenly reminded of the news as her eyes glossed over. she let out a small ‘oh’ at the thought and cleared her throat. another doctor burst in and yanked the man aside.

“gee, aaron, who kicked your dog today?”

“aaron?” selene looked at the man again and looked for any familiar features.

“that’s dr. aaron to you.” she fiddled with the blanket which was uncomfortably thin. the female doctor ordered him to leave the room and sat by her side.

“sorry about him. he’s not good at interacting with anything but his body pillow of ariana grande.” selene grimaced at the thought and she laughed.

“it's fine. everyone has their flaws, i guess. do you happen to know where my son is?”

“oh, hikaru? what an adorable little boy. he’s in the waiting room with his grandparents.” she caressed selene’s arm. “my name is zoey, in case you were wondering.”

“thank you, zoey—i-sorry, dr. zoey.” zoey shook her head and laughed.

“don’t worry, i’m not like that uptight little shit named aaron. you can just call me zoey.” she beamed at selene, showing her gummy smile. she was about to leave, but quickly turned around and snapped and pointed at her. “right! i came in here to tell you that you’re okay to be discharged right about now.”

“thank you, again, zoey. you’ve been a great help!” she nodded as a ‘thanks’ and left the room. selene went back to fiddling with her blanket. he can’t really be gone, can he? i mean, it all happened so fast.

it took her a while to finally come to terms with the harsh truth that her fiancé was dead and she would never see him again. the next couple months would be the hardest, despite what she thought.

prev | masterlist | next

A/N: ngl, i kinda sobbed when i wrote this. and OMG :0 this chapter is 2,578 words long- that’s like the longest thing i’ve ever written without any guidance or prompt. so congrats to me! and i promise that this is the longest the actual word by word text will be in this fic. i’m too tired to write any more stuff so 👍

#haikyuu smau masterlist #hq sakusa #sakusa smau #hq x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa x reader #pure angst #pls cry with me #i hate myself #haikyuu smau

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httdoggo · 4 years

Text

𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐞𝐬𝐚𝐫

Pairing: yan!Caesar Zepelli x reader

WARNING: Mentions of non-con and gore

(This was requested on wattpad)

———————————————————————————————————

Caesar and (Y/n) had been together for almost a year now, they meet each other in a restaurant. (Y/n) was on a date, at least she was supposed to, she was waiting for the person for quite a while and was starting to get mad but also worried thinking were her date was or if her date suddenly dumped her, just by that thought alone her eyebrows had frown.

Just when (Y/n) was about to get up to home, a blonde man takes a sit next to her, making (Y/n) look up with a confused and startled face. The man introduced himself as Caesar Zeppelli saying he couldn't stand seeing a lady with such a sad expression, at first (Y/n) was very uncomfortable with the sudden interaction, I mean how couldn't she? A strange man just took a sit next to her and begin to talk to her. After a while (Y/n) begin to grow more comfortable with Caesar, when it began to get late, Caesar ofer to walk (Y/n) to her home and the girl accepted that.

When (Y/n) arrived home, she thanked Caesar and began thinking about her failed date that turned rather okay. After that Caesar and (Y/n) would hang out together a lot until Caesar asked her to be his girlfriend which the young woman agree on, the two would go on dates and Caesar would always give her presents or flowers.

Now on the present, (Y/n) was very worried about her loving boyfriend Caesar, he was acting strange, he no longer would smile that much around her, he no longer would give her presents or flowers, which she really didn't mind but most importantly he was starting to ignore her.

(Y/n) obviously already knew something was wrong, so she decided to go to her lovers home and confront him about it. When arriving to his house (Y/n) knocked on the door multiple times but got no response, (Y/n) just sigh and took out the key Caesar gave to her probably two months ago, using the key, she open the door and got inside.

Inside the house it was silence, to much silence until she heard a noise upstairs, gulping (Y/n) goes upstairs and saw the door a little open, (Y/n) stoped walking towards the door when she heard a cry and a muffled voice............ a feminine voice.

Out of the sudden a bang was heard, making Caesar turn around just to see (Y/n) shocked face.

"(Y/n)-"

"Just shut up Caesar! How dare you do this to me.... if you didn't loved me anymore you could just break up with me, it would hurt way less you know." - (Y/n) begin to tear up

"(Y/n) wait-"

"I said shut up Caesar, we are done, I hope you have fun with your new girl. J̶o̶s̶e̶p̶h̶-̶

With that (Y/n) run out of the house not minding the shouting from her now ex-boyfriend..... if (Y/n) didn't run away like that, she would have heard the screams and cry of pleading of help and stop from the girl Caesar was with and how it suddenly stopped.

(Y/n) would ignore any type of communication from Caesar would try to do with her, she blocked him from her life. About a year later she meet another man, (f/n), he was a good man, he gave her privacy, respected her space and gave her happiness, so it didn't really took that long for her to fall in love with him and be so happy when her live interest corresponded her feelings.

After about three years (f/n) proposed to (Y/n) and obviously the girl couldn't deny it, she just said a big yes.

On the day of the weeding (Y/n) was preparing herself, she was feeling excited, accomplished and of course nervous, but her friends were there to comfort her.

"(Y/n) don't worry, (f/n) is a good guy, he's the right for you!"

"??? is right, (f/n) won't leave you or betray you like— ow!”

"Hey ???! Don't talk about that! Anyway (Y/n) get ready for your big day and go to the place, we will be going for now, come on ??? let's go."

"Bye (Y/n), se you later!"

After her close friends leave, (Y/n) just sigh and dress up in her weeding dress, after getting ready, (Y/n) leaves the house and calls a taxi to go to her weeding.

When the taxi reached the place, (Y/n) thanked the man, pay him and got out of the car. (Y/n) got up the stairs and enter the building going directly to the room she was supposed to be............. (Y/n) dropped the flowers she was holding by the sight she was seeing.

Blood was almost painting everything expected the higher places, the guest were killed, some were be headed, some no longer looked like a human, some had their organs entirely taken out, some looked like they were skinned alive, her friends were also brutally murder and also.... (f/c).

(Y/n) was so shocked and grossed out by the scene to the point of almost puking that she didn't notice the only man alive on the place with her, looking up she saw-

"Caesar?"

Hearing his name the Italian turned around and gave her a smile raising his arms up in a hug gesture like he was expecting and waiting for her to come and run into his arms. Now that (Y/n) notice he was with a groom's clothing with blood.

"Oh, you finally came (Y/n)."

"Caesar... why- why did you do this?" - asked (Y/n) shacking like a leaf.

"(Y/n).... I shouldn't have cheated on you... I promise that I will never do it again, I promise that I will cherish you and our future family for long as I live!" - said Caesar with a desperate voice completely missing the question.

(Y/n) knew it wasn't a good idea to provoke him but before she could come up with something to say to Caesar, the said man begin to walk towards her making her turn around to run from that place only to trip because of the dress.

"Damn it!" - shouted (Y/n) already crying.

(Y/n) didn't have the chance to get up because two strong harms already did the job for her, (Y/n)'s heart begin to became to quicken her breathing too, causing her to pass out. Caesar looked at her and gave her unconscious figure a smile slipping a ring into her finger.

"Let's go home my beautiful bride...."

Shizaaa

You guys have no idea how many times I accidentally wrote Caesar in my language.

And yes your friends are still called ‘???’

Masterlist

#yandere jjba #yandere jjba x reader #yandere caesar zeppeli x reader #yandere caesar zeppeli #yandere jjba part 2 #yandere jjba battle tendecy #jjba battle tendecy #yandere oneshot #yandere scenario

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whereisstevethestove · 4 years

Note

4 with anaroceit, or loroceit?

Prompt: 4. ‘The king is missing’ with Roman, Janus, and Virgil. For the 300 Follower special here! (x)

TW: Implied Torture:)

AO3 Link (x)

In the three years that Janus of Onryx had been a companion to the king, not once, not twice, but almost fourteen times that the man had gone missing. Most of the time, he had been found hiding somewhere on the grounds, so not exactly missing, but it did add some spice, so he dealt with it.

So don’t judge him if he was rather indifferent to the guard that had burst into his personal study.

“The king is missing.”

“Don’t bother me, I’m busy.” Janus flipped a document over, pulling out a candle so he could wax seal the back.

“He’s not in the palace.”

“Do I care?”

“Janus, please, he was here last.” the guard shifted nervously as Janus lit the candle, still indifferent.

“Let me finish this up and I’ll do your job for you.”

...

The king, meanwhile, was being insulted by a rather cheeky young man. Roman had said good morning to Janus and then had snuck out of his own palace to head to the surrounding town.

Roman loved his job, he loved the people, but he hated how it made it difficult to just go out and observe.

Anyway, he had made it to the edge of the town, where the poorer people lived when the voice assaulted him.

“Looks like a little royal got lost, eh?”

Roman paused. There wasn’t anyone in the area and so he slowly turned in a circle, one hand flinching to his sword. “Where are you?”

“Does it matter? Well, I guess it does, you do look higher ranking than me by any chance. I’m on the roof to your right.”

Roman turned and looked up to see the owner of the voice, who was lounging on the thatch roof of a small shack, smirking.

“Hello Princey.” Roof guy said, waving. “Here to tax me again? Honestly, at this point, might as well take the skin from my neck before I commit high treason.”

Roman sputtered. “I... I was just taking a walk... Thatcher in the Rye.”

“Very creative for a royal. I’m not a thatcher. This isn’t even my roof.”

“It’s not?”

“No, it belongs to the rich fucker who is gonna force me off it.”

Roman really wished that his father had taught him how to talk to people like this. He honestly had no idea.

“can I get a name?”

“Nah.”

“Well, Nah, how can I help you?” Roman swept into a bow, feeling a bit silly to be bowing to a dirt covered person on a roof, but they laughed.

“A royal, bowing to me of all people! Must be my unlucky day. You can’t help me. When I said that I didn’t own this roof, I meant it. It’s eviction day, I’m just waiting to be dragged off in chains.”

The nonchalant way that he seemed to accept it was jarring to Roman. Yet, behind the dirt and the wary gaze, he could see very real panic in the other’s eyes.

...

To say that Virgil was having a good day was a lie. First he’d had woken up to the reminder that this was his last day of freedom and when he decided to make a last, bold but stupid stand, the freaking king had shown up.

He was playing dumb in hopes that King Roman would laugh it off and hopefully leave before the count could show up.

God, it’d be embarrassing to be dragged off kicking and screaming if his royalness was watching.

Unfortunately, the king was still talking and Virgil could see a cloud of dust from about a mile off, which could only be caused by horses.

“Do you know who I am?” The king’s voice pulled his eyes back down. Virgil shrugged.

“You’re dressed like a common folk, but your clothes are too clean and you wield a sword. Most likely a royal boy running from his mommy and daddy for a day out.” Virgil looked back up to see that the dust was closer, probably arriving within the next five minutes.

“How dare! I am an adult.”

“Cool, I don’t care. Run off royal, before the wolves come.” Virgil waved his hand dismissively and the king looked taken aback as he swiveled around to see the approaching count with his entourage.

“Virgil! Get down from there.”

Virgil rolled onto his back, taking in the sky. “Can I take a week to think about it?”

The count sighed, hell it was loud, Virgil could hear it from here, almost fifteen feet away.

“Do you want to be forcefully removed?”

“I mean, I would have gotten off the roof if I wasn’t expecting a fight.” Virgil flipped over again, glaring at the count, the king lost in the small crowd of people that had started to gather outside of their nearby homes to watch.

It happened pretty fast. One of the entourage walked his horse forward, reached up and yanked Virgil down by the hair.

Virgil fell, landed on the dirt with a thud and then scrambled to his feet, attempting to book it before the man from before grabbed his hair again.

“Sorry.”

“It’s whatever I guess. You were hired for this right? Can’t hold it against you.” Virgil said as roof puller got off his horse.

“I have to tie you up.”

“Fair enough.”

The ropes were the worst, and it was only now that Virgil’s bravado left him as he was thrown on the back of a horse, completely at the mercy of the count and company.

He looked up as the horse started to walk, catching a glimpse at the crowd.

“Bye! Wish me luck as I rot!” One last jab, fake snark as a hope to the others that he wasn’t about to be broken.

Virgil then closed his eyes, and quietly began to cry.

...

Janus had finally finished what he needed done when another guard ran in, further annoying him.

“We found him.”

“Thank goodness, I was so worried.”

“He wants to speak with you.”

Janus stood and pushed his chair back, following the man to where Roman’s study was.

His partner was pacing the study, dressed in what looked like a poor disguise, hands running nervously through his hair.

“Ro, what’s wrong?”

Roman looked at him. “Just something I saw today. Do we really tax people so much?”

Janus let out a quiet sigh. “Honey, you might want to sit down.”

“No, I want to know the answer. I just watched someone get tied up and taken because they couldn’t pay! How is that fair!” Roman whirled around, tears pricking in the corners of his eyes.

“We try to do it percentage based. The person you was taken probably owed private tax.”

Roman turned again and Janus walked over, stretching out a hand. “Did you get a name? We can look into it.”

“Virgil. I don’t think he had a surname. But Janus, they ripped him off his roof and just.. took him, it was horrible.” Roman took Janus’ hand, still shaking a bit as his partner folded him into a hug.

“We’ll look at it, promise.”

...

Roman waited a week before looking back with the records finder to see if there was any clue where Virgil was.

Logan was annoying, but at least he did his job better than anyone. He handed Roman a stack of transcripts, and when he looked through it, it was all trade receipts between Virgil and the Count Burgess, and the prices slowly got higher with no explanation to why or what was being traded.

At least he had a location now. Roman took Janus and a few guards on the journey to the Count’s estate.

Needless to say, the Count was surprised to see the king knocking on his door.

“Your Majesty. To what do I owe the pleasure, and with so little warning?”

Roman stepped forward as the Count bowed. “Just looking for someone. Virgil was his name. There’s no record of him after you settled your debts with him.”

“But of course. Come in?”

The group entered and Roman shivered. Everything was perfectly clean, but even then, it all just felt shifted to the left.

“I don’t have many that come to me for financial aid, but when they do, it’s always delightful to help them out. Of course, the poor boy couldn’t pay me back...” the Count turned and opened a door. “He’s down there, two at a time.”

Roman gave Janus’ hand a squeeze before nodding to the Count. “I’d prefer to go first.”

“But of course.”

The pair went down the stairs, it being eerily silent.

“Now, before we enter the backrooms, I’d prefer you don’t have me killed, I’m only collecting my debts.”

Roman narrowed his eyes. “You say that as if you are doing something that would warrant death.”

The Count shrugged. “You seem to be the overly emotional type you Majesty. I learned my method of debt collecting from your father, so forgive me if I do offend you.”

Then he opened the door.

...

Virgil woke up, feeling like death itself had sucker punched him. He didn’t bother opening his eyes, it was dark, of course it would be, he was in the dungeons after all.

Something felt off though.

“Is he okay?” “MMMMmmm, no, the infection is pretty bad. I’m sorry Ro. He’ll probably be in and out of consciousness over the next few days.” “Thank you.”

Virgil tried to open his eyes, yelped in pain from the natural sunlight and then tried to roll away, pain flaring absolutely everywhere.

“Hey, you’re okay now. Promise.”

Virgil didn’t respond and he felt a hand rest on his forehead.

“I’m so sorry etoile. Just rest okay?”

Virgil nodded.

Something warm covered him and he drifted off again.

...

Janus was surprised that Roman had let the Count live. After everything had gone down, they’d returned to the palace with one less Count and one patient in need of severe healing from the injures and undernourishment from just one week.

They were laying in bed when Roman first asked him.

“Am I bad because of what my father did?”

Janus rolled to his side to look at his love. “You saved Virgil, right?”

“yes, but~”

“No buts Ro, you did better than any king I know. You’re a hero.”

“Hmm.” Roman muttered before scooting closer to Janus. “I’m worried. Patton said that he’d get better, but I still worry.”

“How about you let the funny magic man do his healing, and I’ll make sure that you don’t go stir crazy waiting for your crush to wake up.”

“Not a crush.” Roman protested.

“Virgil is very pretty though, you told me that. And you seemed to put a lot of effort in for one person who owed debts to a person.”

“Okay, fine, you win Jan, but you’ll see once he’s coherent. He’s wonderfully snarky.”

Janus laughed quietly. “Fair enough.”

...

Roman wasn’t in the country when Virgil first awoke and was actually functioning past a fever dream and a few mumbled sentences.

Janus was there however, and Roman was right.

Virgil was incredibly snarky, and also very antsy, further proven when he tried to clamber out of the bed, almost falling before Janus caught him.

“Let the fuck go of me.”

“I’m sorry, I’d rather not have staff clean blood from your face off the ground when you collapse.”

Virgil hissed and Janus begrudgingly let him go, hands still hovering just in case.

“Roman’s going to be disappointed that he didn’t get to meet you.”

“We’ve met.”

“Ah yes, the roof incident, I’m well aware.”

“Fuck you.”

...

It took a long time for the scars to heal. It took even longer for Roman to work up the courage to ask if Virgil would court him.

And it was Janus who asked in the end anyways.

#anaroceit #sanders sides #virgil sanders #roman sanders #janus sanders #human au #medieval au #300follower special #not countdown

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drakefeathers · 3 years

Text

anyway this is the beginning of my twewy fic that’s been consuming me for the past month. it’s like. almost 11k now. i'm so close but the last 5% goes the slowest always. neo spoilers obvs.

The route is a little different each time, but it follows the same rhythm. He hits up the usual spots—the scramble, Hachiko, 104. The mural in Udagawa. Then over to Cat Street, and always ending at the river, looking down into the dark entrance of that tunnel.

He’ll mix it up in between, depending on how the mood strikes. Take a loop through Dogenzaka, linger around Center Street or roll through the park. Headphones on, music playing, he keeps it loose and lets his board lead the way, hoping it’ll take him to what he’s looking for.

Scramble’s as crowded as ever today. Beat steps off his board and crosses on foot to avoid crashing into anybody. As he moves along with the stream of pedestrians he keeps an eye out for a pair of headphones, Jupiter brand clothing, a bright head of hair on a scrawny frame—the kind of familiar things that could use a second look.

In the middle of the crossing, he stops. Someone bumps into him, but he stands firm, and the crowd flows around him. He closes his eyes and focuses on screaming one thought as loud as he can in his mind, loud enough to drown out all the noise in this city.

Loud enough that if someone was out there, listening, they couldn’t help but hear him.

A moment goes by. Beat opens his eyes again and keeps walking, stepping onto the curb just as the walk signal blinks over to red.

—

The three of them used to search Shibuya together, at the beginning. But that was a long time ago. Now each of them does their own thing. Beat likes it better this way—alone, he can cover more ground faster on his board. And he can roll with each hit of disappointment as it comes, easier than shielding someone else from it.

Most days he’ll find Shiki by Hachiko. She brings homework or a sketchpad and sits on the railing nearest to the statue, working, but mostly waiting. They don’t always talk—sometimes there isn’t much to say, and he’ll just give a nod as he glides by.

It hurts to see her sitting there. Makes it tough to ignore that hollow feeling in his chest when the same yearning is written clear on her face. Every few minutes she’ll look up and scan the crowds around her with a kind of quiet hope, then lower her gaze again in resignation. The same motion over and over, day after day.

They’ve never brought it up, but Beat knows she can feel it just as much as him, that Neku isn’t erased. That connection from their pact never disappeared, not completely. When they fought the Noise together in the UG it blazed like an inferno, since returning to the RG it’s dwindled down to a spark. But it’s not gone, and neither is Neku. He isn’t even that far away.

He feels so near that Beat can’t shake the sense that the next time he looks over his shoulder he might see Neku there, looking back at him.

Shiki isn’t waiting outside today, but Beat spots her in the nearby cafe, sitting at the counter against the window, facing the square. Her stuffed animal is placed on the tabletop where it can be easily seen. Shiki smiles brightly at Beat and waves at him through the glass, and he waves back and heads inside.

“I heard it was going to rain soon, so I snagged a seat in here,” Shiki says as he sits down on the stool next to her. She pushes over a plate with an untouched half of a sandwich. “Here, you can finish this if you want.”

Beat’s not going to say no to that. Shiki sketches a bit frantically on her tablet while he eats. At one point she lets out a stressed little sigh and scrubs at the screen to erase half her work.

“Whatchu got there?” Beat asks.

“I’m finishing some new concepts for our winter collection. We got funding to double the size of the launch, if you can believe it. I’m hoping we can fit a few more items in.”

“Winter? But it ain’t even summer yet.”

“I know, I’m super behind, actually.” She taps on the screen and pulls up a picture of a plaid coat, smiling at it fondly. “I think Neku would like this one, don’t you? Maybe he’ll be able to wear it in the UG.”

The figure she drew doesn’t even have a face, but it’s Neku. Something about the tilt of the head, the line of its outstretched arm… Beat can’t pinpoint it exactly. He has no idea how Shiki does that, or if she’s even aware.

“Ever since we got the shop in 104, I sometimes think… what if he just walked in one day?” Shiki confesses. She adjusts her glasses as she looks up and gazes out the window hopefully. “I mean… I guess it could happen.”

Beat takes a quick glance over his shoulder. “Yeah. I know what you mean.”

“Anyway, how’s Rhyme? I’ve been so busy, I haven’t talked to her in a while.”

“Good. Busy, too, burnin’ through all those computer courses she’s taking. She’s always holed up in her room, and I don’t understand half of what she’s talking ‘bout these days.”

“She’s still trying to find a way to hack into the UG, right?” Shiki taps a finger against her chin thoughtfully. “That would be amazing. Is it even possible?”

“If anyone can do it, it’s her,” says Beat, his pride clouded with worry, because, honestly, he wishes she wouldn’t. He hates the idea of Rhyme getting mixed up with the Reapers again, even from behind a computer.

“What about you, what have you been up to?” Shiki asks.

“Nothin’ new,” he says with a shrug. “Hittin’ the streets, like usual. Been a long time since I seen anyone from the UG, though.”

“Besides that.” There’s a concerned crinkle between her eyebrows. “How’s school? Or— are things at home any better?”

Beat smiles. “It is what it is, like my sis’d say.” He stands and slings his bag over his shoulder. “I gotta bounce, yo. Later, Shiki.”

“Bye, Beat. Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow.”

—

Some event is going on at 104 this afternoon, the entrance is blocked by a crowd of excited teenagers. Beat gives them a wide berth as he takes his usual quick pass by the building, watching the bustling shoppers and the big video screen for signs of anything suspicious that might hint at the Reapers being up to some shit again. He doesn’t spend a lot of time around here, it’s always too busy, and Shiki’s got this one covered.

There’s a lot of people carrying shopping bags from her store today. He’s happy she’s making her dream come true. She was so torn up with guilt over it for so long, even though they all know it’s what Neku would’ve wanted. It sucks that he isn’t around to see it.

Beat tries not to dwell on these kind of thoughts—there’s no point to it, and it’s not his style, better to keep moving—but as he heads up Center Street he passes a group of friends standing outside a photo booth, laughing loudly over the pictures they’d just taken, enjoying their day together, and he’s freshly gut-punched with how fucking unfair it is.

They won that game. They’d made it out. They were *good*. For those few short weeks, it had really felt like things were going to work out.

Coming back to life had been like a second chance. He and Rhyme were closer than ever, and he had some new friends, forged in fire. His parents were actually a bit better when he got home from the “hospital”, distraught after nearly losing both their kids, and they were cutting him some breaks for once. He even tried pretty hard with school again, and did alright on a few tests.

Not that it was all great. He’s still haunted by that lost look on Rhyme’s face as she sat cross-legged on her bedroom floor their first day back home, her old diary open on her lap, flipping through half-blank pages. “There’s nothing here,” she’d said quietly, with a heartbreaking kind of acceptance.

Beat stood in the doorway, his shaking hands clenched uselessly into fists. “I’m sorry,” he choked out. His vision blurred with tears, and he fought them back, knowing he didn’t have the right. He shouldn’t be crying, he wasn’t the one to lose something precious.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Rhyme stood and gave him a comforting hug that he knew he didn’t deserve. He was probably holding her too tightly, still trying to convince himself that it was real, that she was really there, but she didn’t complain. “All that matters is that we’re together.” After he finally managed to let her go, she went and picked up the diary from the floor, shutting it with a clap. “It’s a closed door. I just have to find my window.”

Rhyme smiled then, small but determined, and Beat knew she would be all right. She always finds a way to face forward. And, for the first time, he felt like maybe he was, too.

It was nice, for a while. But it sure as hell didn’t last.

Now he moves through this city on an endless loop. His grades are trash, his parents barely speak to him except to complain about what a disappointment he is, and he spends too many nights awake trying to outrun nightmares on his skateboard, which just makes the rest of it worse.

But none of that really matters. Not school, definitely not what his parents think of him. The only worthwhile things he’d ever done had been with Neku. They saved Rhyme together, and this whole city. Beat owes him everything. He’ll be damned if he lets his best bud just slip through the cracks of reality. He’s gonna keep looking, no matter how long it takes.

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nopenname23 · 4 years

Text

here’s a shitpost of me playing the click and drag game <3

If you wanna play too, here’s the link X.

KUROO is your Best Friend & BOKUTO is your Sibling

THE KUROO AND BOKUTO FRIENDSHIP ALDKJASDLK. Just living for the imagery of your older brother and your best friend having the BEST broromance?!?

I love it. You’d be the three musketeers

Bokuto is the best big bro and u won’t tell me otherwise

He’d definitely act like 5 years younger than you sometimes, even though he’s a year older

You’d call him nii-chan esp when he’s in emo/baby mode

You’d pep him up in a second when you say “but nii-chan can do anything!”

[[Akaashi (despite his understanding of Kou and abilities to control his funk) is admittedly quite jealous of the immediacy and certainty of your ways]]

Anyways, yeah yeah, kuroo was your brother’s bffl first

But over time he’s just been really dependable and like the /actual/ older bro of your group

Guh I love this dynamic a lot

ATSUMU is your Rival

Same year.

Same class.

Every year.

Sometimes you think it’s fate’s cruel joke.

You’ve got a rivalry going with Atsumu that has only been going on since pre K

It started with you two competing to make the biggest and prettiest sandcastle

To this day, no one knows who stomped on whose first, but everyone remembers the tears and the screaming blame game

In the present, he’s your rival in the sense that you try your best to destroy each other’s egos

Relentlessly.

Your interests are vastly different, but your temperaments are quite the match

Aka Atsumu loooves your reactions

And you take his bait Every. Time.

At the end of the day tho, somehow you still got each other's backs

You stick with the same circle of friends

There's this one time when you gave him the silent treatment for a while and he was very very confused.

He tried to play nice but even then u weren't having it

(Tbh it was like shaking the bottle of a carbonated drink. You felt it, but you seemingly had the patience of a saint)

Atsumu starts to get hurt by this bc even though you never gave each other a break, he's never considered you not a friend

He withdraws and his silence actually shakes the bottle more somehow

So when he mutters an offhand comment about you always being late under his breath at a group hangout

You burst.

LIKE YOU DON'T MAKE US ALL WAIT WHILE YOU PUT THE GREASE ON YOUR MUSTARD HEAD?

o.o

He's stunned (along with everyone else) but it only lasts a second bc everything is back to normal and this feels way better than being ignored

Ughhh why don't you just go home it seems like you haven't prepared your public manners yet >:(

"Don't worry, y/n. I'm not going anywhere. :)"

"KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF BUD ISTG—"

"Did you hear that everyone?? We're buds :)"

TENDOU Plays Volleyball with You

When you were younger, you’d accompany Kou and Kuroo to the community volleyball spaces

And when no one Tendou’s age wanted to play with him, there you were

And the cutest friendship blossomed <3

It was fun, he taught you a lot (and while your technique has improved, you don’t love the effort it takes to chase the ball lol)

You mostly just toss back and forth while you gossip

You both are THE BIGGEST shittalkers

You LIVE to just chat and each other’s antics (you both like to poke fun at others’ egos and laugh about it together later lol. I love a bully duo)

Dw this duo doesn’t make their victims cry or anything

Like max is poking fun at Semi’s casual clothes and saying he looks weird (even though he looks damn fiineee)

SEMI Takes You Out on a Date

speaking of Semi...

SEMISEMISEMI

[[PLEASE TAKE ME OUT MY MUSICALLY GIFTED BB]]

You’ve lowkey crushed on this beauty for a while

But there’s like too many degrees of separation between ya

He goes to tendou’s school, he works at the record store, he’s in a local band

He's so cool and hot and you have no nerve to talk to him

Luckily (or not) tendou somehow makes a date happen

(Tbh I don't think semi knows it's supposed to be a date but it def is for you!!)

You've only waited your whole life for this moment.

You’d go to the movies or something generic (bc you want to plan it out to a tee and make it perfect so u go with cliche bc this is everything you want to tell your grandkids etc)

Yay! Date with semi~

KAI Cockblocks You

(fyi I know next to nothing about Kai, but he gives off v nice guy with a nice smile vibes)

So on your date with Semi, Kai also happens to be working at the movies that day

You’ve been v excited about this date and have maybe overprepared

(as in pretty much scripted the entire thing)

Part of your plan was to see the latest horror film (you think it’ll make you look tough... and you pre-watched it so that you wouldn’t do anything too embarrassing and could come up with quippy lines/reactions)

As you approach the ticket counter, there’s this guy there with a nametag reading Kai

Turns out that horror movie is sold out :/

So Kai suggests a different movie bc it’s playing at the same time

-This is fineeeee. You’ll make do. Stick to the script.-

Too bad the movie’s a Schindlers List type of show

Everything goes NOT according to plan from this point on

You act super awkward (aka major performance anxiety)

You say lines that you prepared for the jumpscare scenes at the dramatic ones in this film

It. is. Not. cute.

No recovery available.

Sorry.

You had plans to eat after but it was a heavy movie and semi thinks it'd be best to part ways here

O.o

"oh. ok...bye"

You don't go to the record store anymore.

Sigh.

So, therefore, Kai inadvertently “ruined all and any semblance of romantic feels that could and would have developed!!”

It’s no fault of his own, but you refuse to forgive him. Ever.

Poor guy :(

(Later you see him playing at a Nekoma match with Kuroo, ur bffl, and you highkey shoot him glares the whole game lol. Gives him SEVERE shivs)

Again, poor guy.

KITA was your First Kiss

When you were in middle school Kita was your first kiss after some freak ‘accident’ on suna’s part HAHA

[[or maybe, casual middle school bf bc he was the nicest friend and you walked home together, held hands, and then tried to kiss and were both like lol nah]]

Dw he’s been very chill about the whole thing, apologises and lets you know it doesn’t count and he’s still your pal (sweet bb)

Atsumu looked on with a surprised raised eyebrow open mouthed look like D8<

If anything, Atsumu is the one who doesn't let anyone forget this happened

YAMAGUCHI Has a Crush on You

Yamaguchi (and all other ‘nice boys’) crush on you because you give off sweet and quiet and perfect wife-y material vibes

Little do they know when you’re with your pals, you’re the rowdiest of the bunch, got the mouth of a sailor, and just the biggest roaster of anyone and everyone

So he has a crush on you for a while

But he never talks to you and that's cool~

?????? Is Your Boyfriend

Tbh i have no clue who that character is... dkm lol

You probably had a period where you forgot his name too

You call him petnames to get around that

You’re mostly dating bc he confessed to you and he seems like he rly likes you so you thought the attention would be nice :)

Atsumu definitely gives you the HARDEST time when he catches on that you don’t know your bf’s name/anything about him.

It is 100p THE. WORST.

He def baits you when you’re in a large group setting with your bf to embarrass you (ex. “Okay, now y/n is going to order us by our first names/birthdays/day we first met her! >:)”)

Yeah, so this relationship lasts longer than it realistically should (but not really that long, you don’t waste ur best years with him or anything)

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #hq au #haikyuu au #kuroo #bokuto #tendou #atsumu #kita #kai #semi #yamaguchi #my writing #my shitpost lol #haiykuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios

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twothumbsandnostakeincanon · 4 years

Note

Every time you lose someone you truly love, you lose a primary feather... And Stiles realizing how few feathers he actually has left in relation to his friends, the pack, etc

oh it’s make Twothumbs cry hours huh? That’s what we’re doing tonight?? We’re making me cry??? I’m taking you all down with me.

Scott’s feather was the first feather Stiles actually remembered growing.

The fierce love he had for his brother-by-choice had spiked a pinfeather a year after his mother’s feather had fallen out. Once the new one reached full size, Stiles had been able to fly again. Still clumsy, still a struggle- but he’d been able to fly on his own for the first time in a year.

Sometime after that he grew a feather for Lydia too, giving him his third. He knew Lydia didn’t have one for him, but that was okay. The extra feather had given him more stability, made staying in the air a little easier, and that was enough for him to love her even more.

His father’s feather was the on the furthest tip of his right wing. The feathers he grew for his favorite deputies at the station lived on his right wing too. Melissa’s feather was on the left, in between Scott’s and Lydia’s.

He had a total of eight primaries at the beginning of his sophomore year. Classmates laughed at his notorious clumsiness, sniggering as he banked wildly in the air, their young minds unable to make the connection of exactly why he lacked the fine control most others had naturally with ten or more primary feathers.

Stiles didn’t really care. He’d come a long way from a single feather.

Perhaps that was why he went with Peter, though: the single primary feather hanging loosely from his wings. It was such a foreign and familiar sight; familiar from a year of seeing it on himself, and foreign for having never seen it on anyone else.

He could have fought more. Could have argued, could have screamed, could have done any number of things on that field. Instead, he looked at that dangling feather, and went with him.

Later that evening, he looked at it again as it drifted to the ground moments before Derek ripped out Peter’s throat.

__________

God, he ached.

Stiles gingerly taped gauze over the cut that Argent left in his thigh before reaching for the arnica cream. He decided to only put it on the biggest bruises, and yet ended up covering most of his body anyway.

After that, he carefully stepped into sweats, forgoing a shirt. He could put one on after he checked over his wings.

Stiles sat down on his bed, turning on his lamp and directing it toward himself like a spotlight. Then he stopped. He needed to check them- he knew that bastard had at least ripped out a handful of coverts.

But he didn’t look. He just sat there. Exhausted, unwilling, and alone.

Scott was at Allison’s house.

Just like he’d been when the kanima had trapped Stiles at the pool.

Just like the day after Matt brought the kanima to the station, when Stiles lost three primary feathers.

Just like every other time Stiles had needed him in the last few months.

“Well, one of us was recently dead, but by the looks of things here I’m not sure it was actually me.”

Stiles, lacking the energy to startle, just slowly looked up at his window to see Peter smoothly duck in.

“You’re actually back,” he said with a blink. Peter raised an eyebrow.

“You saw me at the warehouse, didn’t you?” he asked. Stiles waved a hand.

“I got the shit kicked out of me and then crashed my car into a lizard boy,” he said listlessly. “What I did and didn’t see is up for some serious debate.”

“Hm,” Peter said, eyes sharply taking in the bruises and cuts on Stiles’ upper body. “I can see that.”

Stiles suddenly remembered that he’d helped kill Peter, and that he currently had all of his injured vulnerable points on display. He thought he should probably be more concerned about it than he was.

Instead, he finally reached back and carefully pulled out his left wing, looking away from Peter and checking it over. Sure enough, he had a bloody bald patch where Argent had torn out several feathers.

Something tapped him on the shoulder, and Stiles glanced over to see Peter holding out a tube of antibacterial.

“Thanks,” he mumbled distractedly, twisting it open and wincing slightly as he smoothed it over the sensitive skin. Growing those back was going to itch like hell.

After that, he carefully worked down the rest of the wing, feeling his way along the afterfeathers to check for more injuries. He found a few bent, one broken, and then just as he reached the end of the wing-

Peter sucked in a tiny breath.

Stiles held a primary in his hand.

He stared at it, loose in his open palm.

There was a long moment of silence, eventually broken by Peter quietly saying, “That’s going to make flying more difficult.”

Stiles continued to stare at the feather for another moment before forcing himself to look away.

“I still have four. I’ve flown with less.”

He carefully set Scott’s feather down on his nightstand, and deliberately turned to examine his right wing. Silence once again reigned between them, broken only by the brush of Peter handing him more antibacterial for a few more broken feathers.

By the time he was done, Stiles was utterly exhausted.

“Did you actually want something?” he asked. He just wanted to sleep, and he couldn’t even begin to interpret the look on Peter’s face. It smoothed out a moment later anyway.

“Yes, but it can wait. Go to sleep. I’ll see you later, Stiles.”

And with that, he ducked out the window again.

Stiles watched as Peter swept his wings out behind himself to slow his fall-

Wings with absolutely no primary feathers.

__________

Stiles had so much shit to take care of. The Alpha pack was still out there fucking up everyone’s shit, and someone else was doing ritual sacrifices, and his dad had asked if he was on drugs, and he had Spanish vocab to finish-

Just, so much shit.

And yet. And yet, here he was, opening a box from Ebay with a used pair of flight aids in it.

They didn’t look great. And from what Stiles could remember of his childhood experience, they weren’t terribly comfortable either. But they did work, taking the place of missing primary feathers and allowing greater freedom of movement.

Something Stiles thought was likely very desirable to a werewolf with a history of being murdered.

Before he could think too hard about it, he threw the fight aids back in the box and drove over to Peter’s apartment.

As he walked up to the door, hands full, he hesitated again. What was he doing here? Maybe he should just leave the box on the welcome mat- but the choice was taken out of his hands when Peter’s door opened upon approach.

“Stiles. How… surprising,” Peter drawled. “I don’t remember telling you where I live.”

Stiles raised his eyebrow

“I didn’t tell you where I live either, but you still showed up at three a.m.; directly into my room, I might add.” He shook his head, dismissing the question and pushing forward now that the opportunity for misgivings was gone. “Here, take the box.”

Peter raised an eyebrow, gingerly accepting it as he scented the air. He scrunched his nose slightly in distaste.

“This doesn’t smell like you. Whose is this?”

“Okay first,” Stiles ticked off a finger, “it’s weird for you to just casually mention that something does or does not smell like me, and two,” he ticked off a second finger, “it’s yours. I mean, now. Now it’s yours. It was someone else’s.”

“Mm, yes, nothing says ‘heartfelt gift’ like pre-used goods,” Peter said dryly, finally stepping back into his apartment, allowing Stiles in. “What is it?”

Stiles followed, looking away uncomfortably before answering.

“I, uh. When I was a kid, I tried a couple of different flight aids. Just for getting to school and back, you know? This type was the best. Not great or anything, but they let you move fast.”

Peter stilled completely, frozen for a beat with his hands on the box.

“It’s just,” Stiles hurried on, “if you get eaten by the Alpha Pack or whatever because you’re trapped on the ground, then we’ll be left with just Derek again, and he doesn’t know shit about anything, except maybe like the top ten ways to lose shirts, so you have to have something. I know they’re ugly, but like. You have to have something, and those were the ones that worked best for me, but the company doesn’t exist anymore so… Ebay.”

He finished awkwardly, hands shoved in his pockets.

Peter looked at him for a moment, a strange expression on his face, before saying, “Thank you.”

Stiles shrugged.

“No problem.” He cleared his throat a little. “Anyway. Uh. Bye.”

Stiles moved to leave, but hesitated when Peter started chuckling. He looked back over his shoulder, suspicious that he was being mocked, but Peter just smiled.

“I’m not kicking you out, Stiles. Stay for a minute and help me try these out.” And with that, he finally opened the box and pulled out one of the flight aids, examining it. “They clip onto my primary coverts?”

Stiles watched him for a moment.

He still had so much shit to take care of… but he could stay for a bit.

Or maybe a bit longer.

__________

Stiles checked his primaries. Again. There were three. Still three, after the bomb at the station. After the nogitsune. One for his dad, one for Melissa, one for Lydia.

There were still three.

They just weren’t the same three-

“Any fresh word on our local hit list?” Peter drawled, entering the apartment with two cups of coffee.

Stiles hurriedly dropped his wings, tucking them behind himself and out of sight.

“Nope. It’s pretty hard to find out what’s going on when our only lead got murdered,” Stiles said pointedly, turning back to his laptop.

“As if we were going to get a word out of someone with no mouth anyway,” Peter scoffed, setting down one of the cups next to him as he looked over Stiles’ shoulder at the screen. “You haven’t been able to find any more contractors?”

“Oh no, I’ve found plenty of contractors. All with equally stupid names. ‘The Chemist,’ and ‘The Butchers,’ and ‘Bullet 80.’ It feels like a list of early 2000’s band names.” Stiles sat back, picking up his coffee for a sip. “It’s just that there’s no way to know how they’re getting job offers.” Peter reached over his shoulder to scroll down a page, leaning his other hand on Stiles’ shoulder. Stiles tried not to shiver, and as always lately, failed.

Peter was the only one who touched him so casually anymore.

Peter squeezed a bit, beginning to knead the muscle there seemingly without thought, and Stiles leaned into it.

“This is a lot of assassins,” Peter murmured as he continued to scroll.

“I mean, if the prices here are any indication, it’s a pretty lucrative career I guess,” Stiles said gesturing lightly at the screen with his cup. Peter hummed in agreement.

“Lucrative, but perhaps an over-saturated market,” Peter mused, contemplative. “However, if we were to clear out some of the competition…”

Stiles reached up and lightly flicked Peter in the ear with his free hand.

“We’re not going to start murdering for money.”

Peter scowled, pulling his hand away from Stiles’ shoulder to protectively cover his ear.

“As opposed to doing it for free like we are now? Like chumps?” he challenged.

“Like chumps,” Stiles said firmly. “Besides, you know you would hate the cleanup.”

Peter reluctantly smiled.

“Yes, I suppose that at least is right.”

With one last light stroke to Stiles’ upper coverts, Peter took his own coffee and moved to the other side of the table where his own laptop sat.

They continued searching for information long past the time the coffee was gone, occasionally speaking but more often silent. Stiles began to get more worried the longer they went without finding answers.

His fingers found their way back into his feathers again, winding around his primaries as they did so often.

And just like every other time lately, a slow sense of unease crept over him as he felt them.

“It doesn’t seem to help,” Peter said quietly from across the table.

Stiles startled, hand tightening. Peter was looking at him, and gestured at the place Stiles was gripping.

“You hold on to your primaries often lately, but it never seems to comfort you. Not anymore.”

Stiles let out a slow breath, ready to blow him off, to say it was nothing-

But.

“They’re not the same,” he murmured. “When the Nogitsune- I don’t know, made a new body for me or whatever, he didn’t quite-“ Stiles blew out a frustrated breath, knowing how ridiculous this was going to sound. “They look exactly the same, but they don’t feel right. I can’t tell you exactly what’s wrong, but every time I touch them… I start to wonder if they’re actually mine. And if they’re not mine, whose are they?”

His hands clenched around his feathers again, torn between the instinct to preserve his feathers and his ability to fly, and to tear out the invaders that grew out of whatever twisted facsimile of love the nogitsune was capable of.

He startled yet again when hands covered his own, carefully prying them away.

“They’re yours, Stiles,” Peter said, voice calm, locking Stiles’ hands in his own. “Even if somehow they weren’t grown for the same people as your first feathers, they’re still sustained by that. They’re maintained for the people you love.”

Stiles looked back at Peter, wanting to believe.

“They’re yours, Stiles,” he repeated.

Stiles took a deep breath.

“They’re mine.”

With one last grateful squeeze to Peter’s hand, he turned back to his laptop.

__________

“I’m borrowing this book.”

“No you’re not.”

“Yeah I am.”

Peter rolled his eyes at the kitchen table where he continued typing. Stiles could see it from where he lay sprawled in the living room, and grinned.

“No you’re not. Borrowing implies you’ll be taking it somewhere else, and you spend all of your time here,” Peter said distractedly.

“I do not!” Stiles protested. Peter briefly looked up at him with a dry expression.

“In the last week, the only reason you’ve left my apartment was to go home to make dinner for your father. Last night you didn’t even leave to do that, you just made it in my kitchen and then took it to him at the station.”

“You offered-!”

“I didn’t say I don’t want you here,” Peter said, eyes never leaving his laptop, “just that it hardly makes sense to say you’re borrowing something when the thing you’re borrowing is unlikely to leave my apartment anyway.”

Stiles’ mouth hung open for a moment before snapping shut. Peter’s feathers shuffled a bit as he rearranged his wings, apparently intent on the email he was typing. Stiles thought it was probably a “fuck you” business letter. Peter always really got into those. His feathers fluttered a bit again, and something odd caught Stiles’ eye.

A small new feather.

A primary feather.

His mouth dropped open again.

He almost said something. He very, very nearly said many things.

But Peter’s wings readjusted again, and the tiny feather disappeared.

Stiles snapped his jaw shut.

Because Peter had a point- Stiles was here most of the time. Almost all the time, in fact.

So he would know if Peter had repaired his relationship with Derek, or if he’d found a new relationship outside the pack.

Mind occupied, he absently scratched at the tip of his right wing, smoothing along the new quill there.

Maybe he would get to keep this one for a while.

#olor-et-luna #steter #someone stop me from using this idea to write a post-breakup fic #where they bump into each other five years later and they still have each other's feather #2.6k words #tumblr fic and kinda fic #this blog needs a tag for my bullshit #wingfic #featheruary #also don't @ me about flying with just two primary feathers It's Fiction #I should maybe start putting these up on ao3 #it's been like twelve years since I moved anything from here to there 😬😬😬

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