#and. all the other things that take priority
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Waiting room
Pairing: Dr ratio, Aventurine, Sunday x g/n!reader
Summary: You can love, get on your knees and wait on a miracle. There are things that are for you and aren't for you, you should know. It's for the better.
Cw. Heavy angst, no comfort, 1% fluff, manipulative men, toxic relationships, insecurities, death?, unrequited love, breakups, them neglecting you cos…, no closure, what is love?
A/n: hi, time to make you cry. I'm getting writer's block as I'm making a new novel!! It has the ‘your guardian angel’ fics plot but w my characters. 🥳
Dr ratio
He's a simple man, really.
Drown yourself in endless textbooks, advanced literature and neglect every other thing.
Like his thirst for knowledge; love is endless, affection is abundant.
Is what you initially thought.
It has been the 4th time this week that he turned down your requests, “Dear, you know I have no time for that.”
He does not try to sugarcoat his words, he does not try to make his tone less harsh, “I don't have time for dates, such a waste of time.'' He says it like it is, he says it like it's true.
Your eyebrows creased, annoyed at his flippant attitude, “What do you mean waste of time?”
Veritas takes one glance at you, then back to his nonsense book. To him, it was useless wasting his breath on arguing with you.
“Veritas, you said we'll go, you promised.”
He is cruel, his words flinty. “I do not recall making any atrocious promises to you, are you perhaps going insane?”
Insane?
“Insane? Last week, you promised me.”
“I did not.”
“Yes you did.”
He scoffs, as if offended, “If I did, then I was not thinking straight. I have a thesis due tomorrow. A date can wait.”
Veritas is a man with priorities and out of all of them, it seems, you were not one of them. He'd rather his books kept him company, not you. It's obvious, his pursuit of knowledge was greater than loving you.
He lit his lamp, taking his pen and highlighting some paragraphs, what was so important with them? You could not help but come closer, skimming through the contents, it was just some theory some genius society member wrote.
“You're miserable,” it might've accidentally slipped out, but it was true; he is, in fact, the most miserable of all men.
Veritas rolled his eyes, pushing his reading glasses and annotating whatever statement was written. The candle light flickered when his heavy breaths fanned over it, not paying mind to whatever you say.
Your patience was thinning, how long was he planning to play this damned game?
“Veritas.”
You call out once.
“Veritas!”
Again, in anger.
“Veritas”
The last time, desperately.
He does not respond, he does not care. Yet your voice was ringing in his ears in an unpleasant way, “Is this about the date?”
You were taken aback by his curt reply, it wasn't just about the date. “Is that all? Do you think that's the only reason?”
“Hypothetically speaking, yes.”
“Cut the bullshit, veritas.”
Veritas glares at you, as if making a statement; a bullshit one at that. He does not have time for mindless topics, he's overworked, he's tired, he's unsatisfied.
For a moment, you have the urge to yell at him. This shallow bastard has done nothing but fool you with aureate words, he writes poetry about you and shows you off.
He loves you because you are all he has. He may be an asshole but he loves you the way he knows how to love you.
Tonight, however, you are done with his bullshit. You do not argue further, he is confused. When you leave this room with no more qualms, when you do not scream at him, he is bewildered.
“Where are you going?” It's strange that he noticed you for the first time. Only when you get dressed up and when he hears the keys jingle, does he notice every single detail.
You adjusted the cuffs of your blouser, “I'm staying at a friend's”
“Which one?”
“None of your business.”
Stunned, he drops his pen. Why are you acting so off? You're driving him insane.
“What do you mean none of my business? Stop acting so childish.”
That was your last straw, childish? Childish? The fucking audacity.
“You are more childish.”
“How so?”
“You— do I even have to explain it?”
Nothing could quell your frustration other than being away from him for the meantime, “Yes,” he loves you, he wants to know. But even if he does, he never learns; so much for a genius.
“You neglect me, you prioritise this,” it was tempting to crumple his papers, “—over me.” So you did.
He is indifferent. He does not understand how and why it hurts you. So he tries to understand it from a logical standpoint, “So you want to really go on that date?”
“I'm tired of asking”
Tired of begging him to treat you right, to love you like you want him to love you.
He stays quiet.
“I'm tired of begging for something so small.”
“You didn't have to destroy my goddamn book,” he seethed and pulled the book from your hands, too absorbed in the damage of the book he does not notice how much he has damaged you. Veritas is too blind to see you holding back tears despite wearing his glasses.
The force surprised you, “Is that thing much more important?”
“What?”
“Answer me Veritas Ratio.”
It was merely just a book, but it was precious. It was a rare one, it annoyed him to immeasurable depths when you crumpled it so recklessly.
He does not answer.
“I'm leaving,” he's not sure if leaving meant temporarily, he hopes it is. He hopes you come back again tomorrow night.
So he waits. Tomorrow came, but you did not come home.
Aventurine
He loves you, he really does.
His idea of love is adorning you with jewels, showering you with riches.
Too much that you suffocate, it hurts. You can't breathe, soulless eyes stare into yours.
It's when you realise, he's trapping you. Does he think you're stupid? What does he take you for?
“Darling! I got you a gift!”
The 22nd one this week… Aventurine makes haste and runs behind you, wearing the necklace on you, it looks… okay.
You look like a doll, his doll.
But you are not a doll, you are human.
And like all humans, we all wish to be loved and cherished as an equal.
“Do you like it?” It would be rude to say no, but it does not fit you. Sure it accentuates your neck, but it's too much.
“I…” you traced your finger over the gem, “I do.”
“Great! I'll get you another tomorrow!” It is tiring. As much as planets worth of gold and extravagant jewels excite you, you would rather be in his presence.
You do not recall the last day he's ever taken you out on a proper date, you do not recall any time where he's been open to you about his past because you know damn well his name could never just be ‘Aventurine’.
You were sitting on the couch, sipping tea with your eyes glued to your book. Before you knew it, soft lips grazed on your cheek.
“You're back earlier than expected,” he smiles as he pressed another kiss onto you, “I ditched the meeting, for you.”
Oh how you hate it when he does things in your name just to make you indebted to him. Aventurine loves you, but love is transactional.
“Is that so?” He nods, wrapping his arms around you. “I'll buy you something again, we have another business trip in Penacony.”
It makes you wonder, does he think gifts are the only thing that'll make you stay?
He could see the reluctance in your eyes, “Is something on your mind?”
You bit your lip, “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean.”
A deafening silence fills the room before he chuckles, he is everything but stupid. He knows, he knows you want to spend time with him, he knows you’d incinerate those gifts in a heartbeat just to trade even an hour spending time with him.
“Dear, I promise, next time,” he pressed light kisses on your exposed shoulder, but it isn’t enough: what truly is enough?
You want to push him away, with how ruthless he is with making empty promises so easily, “You said ‘next time’ last time.”
”I promise, I do.” Even he sounds unsure. You pick up on the hint of hesitation laced in his promises, he regrets it, but he thinks; he’s doing it for you, for the both of you.
“You said that too last month,” you scoff.
He tried to intertwine your fingers together yet to no avail, you rejected him, “Why are you acting up again?”
There’s only so many gifts can buy but he can never purchase the time lost that could’ve been spent in lazy mornings together yet he traded it all for credits. The second attempt, he forces a smile and even pulls a tiny ring for you, that gem you loved so much engraved in the centre. Words cannot express how much you despise these gifts because it was just a pathetic compensation for the neglect.
”Please, next month.” He took your hand in his and put the ring on your ring finger. “Okay?”
You cling to that possibility, to that sliver of hope when he is done with Penacony, he is relieved of his duties and he is finally free. That he no longer has to overcompensate for his absence and shower you with the time he’s lost.
You know next month won’t come, yet you are no different from a fool.
”Okay”
You wait upon endless tomorrows, two months have passed and none of his coworkers have any good news about his well-being. They’re sure he’s dead, but you still wait for that tomorrow where he is home to come.
Sunday
Love, what truly is love?
Is it when you praise your lover with endless ‘I love you’s?
Is it when you hold their hand and protect them for the impending doom to come?
or rather, is love just a fallacy built on a string of lies?
Sunday believes that he knows what’s best for you.
Before Sunday, you were allowed to make your own decisions.
Before Sunday, you actually had freedom.
The halovian swears he knows what’s best for you.
He makes sure everything you want or need, you get.
Sunday will kiss your tears away, even if he is the sole reason for them. ”It’s for your own good.” he says.
To strip you of freedom, to shackle you to him like a bird in a cage. His sweet kisses, his love, his everything; they’re all fucking poison. He does not hesitate to drown you in his poison if it means protecting you.
You cry out, “Sunday.” In desperate pleas.
But he will not listen, he’ll pretend he doesn’t hear anything.
He believes that if he gives you the taste of freedom, you’ll find a way to fly away from his grasp– he will not allow it. So he does what he’s best at, keeping you stuck to him.
”What do you want, dear?” He smiles at you like he’s never sinned.
You throw away the pathetic gifts he adorned you with, gold, diamonds and stones you could not name but they are not what you want, “I want to see my friends.”
”They’re no good, trust me.” Your friends once told you that you should go, that he’s toxic, but you were a fool to drown in him.
“What do you know about my friends?” He’s done everything to kill that flame inside of you, that hope that maybe one day you’d escape him and be free once again, you’re a fool, he thinks.
He clicks his tongue as he puts down his newspaper at the coffee table, ”They tried to take you away from me.”
”They did not, you know I would never leave you.” A blatant lie but it's stupid that you take him for a fool that’ll believe your words.
He only chuckles, your attempts to get away from him are futile, it’s pathetic it makes him laugh. “I admire your confidence, but you’re staying here tonight.”
Death has never been more alluring under his influence, but you can not die.
“Please,” you beg again, but he only presses his finger to your lips, “Shh…”
”One day you’ll thank me for taking such good care of you.” He gets down on his knees to kiss the back of your hand, “You’re safe here.”
He gets up to sit right next to you, he doesn’t flinch when you slap his face away when he tries to kiss you. The man only grabs your wrist when you try to push him away again. He kisses you with passion, in love but is it truly love when there is no trust?
There’s no use questioning his intentions, “This is for your own good.”
What good is there when there is no freedom? He thinks beautiful birds should be protected. Even if it meant being trapped in a cage, stripped of any sense of freedom, as long as you're safe, as long as you're here with him, he is content. "Dont give me that look."
Your eyes train on the way he rolls his eyes at your defiance, "Just let me go."
Sunday glares at you, his grip on your wrist tight, you're sure he's about to tear it off. "No."
When will you stop acting like a child?
The halovian is too far down the rabbit hole of self righteousness and his obsession with you that he if he needs to tear you limb by limb to keep you close to him, to keep you from rubbing away, he will do it.
His phone rings, it must be business calls again, Penacony sure is in a state of chaos when it's crumbling down. He lets go off you to take his phone.
"Yes yes... Sunday speaking."
You dont understand what they're murmuring about. All you could register is it's something about his sister.
His facial expression turned grim the more time he spent on the phone. The phone call ends and he puts it down, the life from his face drained but when he sees you, he is relieved.
You are still here with him.
He intertwined your hands together, you can feel anger and despair that he's exuding as he stares at you like a deer in the headlights. "Please, promise me."
"You'll never leave me too."
It doesn't sound like a question, it sounds like a statement.
You'll truly never know what freedom is, for that is only a privilege that you can never have. In his arms you cannot cry, because he'll drown you in his lies again and again.
On the bright side, you are never alone. You will always have Sunday, whether you like it or not.
Note: bye i got extreme writer's block at Sunday's part I had to take almost a 2 week break bc i rlly have no idea what to write for him oh my god. I absolutely did not give them justice 😥
Written by @khuzena. Likes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated. ♡
#what have i done#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr fluff#hsr x reader#honkai star rail angst#dr ratio angst#dr ratio fluff#dr ratio x reader#aventurine angst#aventurine x reader#aventurine fluff#hsr aventurine#aventurine honkai star rail#hsr sunday x reader#hsr sunday#sunday fluff#sunday x reader#honkai star rail sunday#veritas ratio#veritas ratio x reader
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how hard(?) would you say it is to translate? Ive been kinda curious about that, like does anything get lost in translation/ just not make that much sense without knowing the og language? or anything like that? 🤔
Hm, maybe 7 or 8 on a scale of 10? Though it can easily go higher at times, haha. (Always when Sung Hyunjae is in a scene because his name is a misspelling and it pisses me off.* This is a joke. Only half, though.) Basic word-by-word dictionary lookup is simple, which is why machine translators can do it well enough. But then you have to string all of it together in a sentence where you:
figure out and find a way to convey any difference in connotation between this specific chosen word and other words that mean the same thing (think the connotations of "regal" VS "royal" in English), and
do the same as above, but on a sentence-wide level translating the nuance of a particular grammar/sentence structure (thousand and one sentence endings in Korean, I swear -_-), and
make sure distinct character voices are retained or translated from the original Korean (think Song Taewon's stiff formality VS Han Yoojin's more casual speech VS Sung Hyunjae's middle-aged rich guy-type speech), and
make sure this sentence flows with the overall paragraph/chapter.
All those priorities have to be juggled throughout the chapter and add up to make it a fairly hard task. It definitely gets easier with practice once you're more familiar with the language (especially the nuance/connotation stuff), though, and I did get lucky in that my native language shares some aspects with Korean so the grammar is easier to intuitively grasp. Of course, I'm still learning, so I do have times I need to call in more experienced speakers for help.
(I definitely wouldn't say I'm good with the language period. Recently I've tentatively picked up a new novel—people following my personal blog will know which one—and it turns out I'm familiar with the way Geunseo talks and familiar with the vocabulary typical to dungeon fantasy novels, but kind of. Majorly hopeless when it comes to other stuff. The phrasing is juuust off enough that I keep getting tripped up and taking thrice as long to understand what's being said.)
There's definitely stuff that wouldn't make sense in English—certain idioms, cultural stuff, and all that, but that's why I try to localize wherever possible and add footnotes with relevant info/links if not. And there is stuff that gets lost in translation—you can look at the chapter titles from 302–307 for an example of that, where the joke is much more immediately obvious in Korean but had to be translated differently as chapter title VS in-chapter text messages and lost the clear parallel. I also remember being grumpy back during the virtual reality dungeon arc because Yoohyun would use 네놈 (ne-nom but typically pronounced ni-nom, a derogatory way to say "you", LMAO) towards Sigma and there was no concise way to get that across in English except having him be aggressive and direct. Especially since he isn't the type to swear by word of god, so I couldn't have him addressing him with "asshole" or "jerk" to convey it.
TL;DR: Fairly hard to translate, but gets easier with time, and there is stuff that's lost or difficult to understand, but I do what I can to make it understandable in English!
--
* Sung Hyunjae uses "ae" at the end, but that implies it's 성현재, which is wrong—the correct spelling is 성현제, which should be "Sung Hyunje". (If you wanted to go the full Revised Romanization route, it'd be Seong Hyeonje, but I've weathered my share of name changes and that's a step too far even for me.) I've been meaning to make a poll about changing it like with the Lauchitas spelling, but I keep forgetting.
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Hi!!
I was a bit confused on you info about Lumians, and wanted to ask you if you have any more info on them! :D
I’m totally cool with infodumping btw!
Thanks in advance!! :>
Boy oh boy spopera lore time!
First of all credit for Lumian!Martyn to @strifesolution , who is the local Yogscast fan among us space operators that make up the au, and since lumians are a yogs aliens.
General spopera tdlr is: treebark are spaceship racers! For the space opera au I think we’ve been allowed to make things up a bit and play around with the lumian worldbuilding. Here’s what I got from the collective lore google docs for the au:
Lumians are a bipedal humanoid species that produces a bioluminescent element in their bodies called bioneos. Lumians are identifiable by bioneos freckles. In the au and out of the main characters, Martyn and False are lumians, Martyn having an almost cyan tone to his bioneos, while False has red.
The colour varies, and it can help track family lineage, despite the fact that lumians are typically a communal species with no nuclear family unit. However, some lumian families that leave their home planet may no longer have the community support, and likely adopt a family unit home style.
Lumians may have “gendered” appearances but they are a unisexual species. Societal roles in lumian culture are often decided by stature. Shorter, broader lumians often take to building, hunting, and child rearing. Taller, more slender lumians will take to taming, climbing, and navigation.
The home planet of Lumians, Corruscate, has a tropical climate. The planet is mostly covered in jungle and forests, with megaflora that cast dark shadows. To compensate for the darkness created, living species in Corruscate, as the lumians themselves, have bioneos that create the bioluminescence typical of lumians.
Since lumians are from a hot planet, they are particularly susceptible to cold and temperature drops. As a defense mechanism to save energy mentally and physically, and to be able to get themselves out of the cold, they’ve evolved “glacieration”, also known as “frost mode”
Frost mode is essentially a survival mode to keep them alive. As the temperature decreases the lumian will feel cold and uncomfortable and sick, until they suddenly seem to gather themselves and be okay; this, apart from a pale and grey complexion and dulled glow, is a sign of frost mode.
The body freezes over as it switches its priority from maintaining heat to creating adrenaline for the lumian to use to get themselves into a safe temperature. However, the modern lumian can decide to ignore the primitive urge to warm up and instead do other activities, although prolonged frost mode is lethal.
A result of the intense shot of adrenaline is erratic behaviour, like apathy or snapping or being aggressive.
(These pieces I made for treebarkweek, for example, were meant to be about frost mode happening while Ren and Martyn went to a very cold planet for a race. The assumption is that the cold discomfort happened mid-race, but Martyn refused to retire. Afterwards when Ren follows him into the lockers he finds him fully in frost mode; he can't feel the cold anymore since he's sort of icy all over now, and he's pumped full of adrenaline and suceptible to being irrational, so he'll probably pick a fight with Ren if Ren decides to chastise him about putting the race before his health)
(My guy is ice. He's producing cold clouds. Someone give him lukewarm water)
(Also it might be obvious already but frost mode was taken from the idea of having inthelittlefrost in the au somehow.)
#THANK YOU FOR THE ASK THIS WAS SUPER FUN TO ANSWER!!!!#we fr love the au all the people involved#at all time im thinking about space opera au. space f1 treebark save me....#save me lumians... save me little glowsticks.....#space opera au#asks.tag#ghast.art
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Hello! A continuation of Snow White + Tangled AU (and I really need a name for this, I welcome suggestions)
When Lucifer regains consciousness, he realizes 3 things. 1) Lilith's office is destroyed. 2) His...Lilith lied to him. 3) He took off his ring for the first time since she left, and he doesn't know what to do about it.
He just doesn't understand, what did Lilith gain by lying to him? What did she gain by giving him false hope that one day he would get his daughter back? What did she gain by reassuring him by telling him that everyone in hell was looking for Charlie?
He thinks about it and...believes he could understand her. He definitely would have understood if she had told him she didn't want a baby, he wouldn't have demanded anything from her. If Lilith just wanted to rule hell she could have done it, he would have been happy to give Charlie his full attention, he would have let Lilith remain as free as ever while he was a father. So, yes, he understands that it wasn't a priority for Lilith to find Charlie, but why take the option away from him? Because that's all Lilith did, right? She just lied to him when she said they were looking for her daughter, right?
Definitely...her daughter had been kidnapped by that sinner, perhaps with some terrible ideas in mind...Lilith just took advantage of the situation...right?
He can't...he doesn't want to think about that right now. He puts his ring in his jacket and goes to look for some toys, clothes and photographs to take to his daughter. He promised to bring her proof.
When he returns to the hotel, he shows his daughter all her things, everything he treasures, he tells her that her room is intact and that she can go see it if she wants. Her daughter looks at everything almost with...indifference, she touches the dresses and thinks the toys are cute, she looks at the photos and says she recognizes herself in them, but she doesn't seem to feel anything.
He understands, their time together was so short, he doesn't expect her to run into his arms (he definitely does). He tells her that he knows it will take time, but that he really wants to be a part of her life. He tells her that he is very sorry for the terrible experience she had to go through, he apologizes for taking so long to find her, and that he really wants to be her father.
It is to this that he gets a reaction from her. Charlie frowns, closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. When she looks at him again, she tells him that she will be... happy that they can start getting to know each other, that he can visit her whenever he wants, even if he is not very busy, she will reserve a room for him in the hotel so that he has a place to arrive. But he must understand that she will also be busy, she has a business to run.
She also asks him not to attack her father when he sees him. He tries to protest, but she interrupts him and asks him to understand, regardless of what he believes or what the truth is, the only father she has ever known is Alastor, and that if he wants their relationship to move forward, he must accept that Alastor was, is and always will be part of her life. She tells him that this private meeting between the two of them was Alastor's idea, so that they could talk calmly and determine the basis of their relationship.
Lucifer doesn't want to agree to that, but for now he'll accept it. He just has to show HIS daughter the life that sinner took from her by kidnapping her. He will give her everything she could want.
---
Charlie is...uncomfortable with all this sudden attention.
It's not that she's used to being ignored, quite the opposite. Her first years in society she had respect and attention for being the daughter of the Radio Demon, until she began to garner her own respect. And contrary to what most people in Hell may think, his father was not a heartless monster, he was simply very selective about who showed that soft side.
What makes her so uncomfortable is that the King's attention feels so...false? Like he's overcompensating for something.
That kind of attention is what she saw in some sinners who approached her hoping to get something from her father. That kind of attention where they just give you things and pretend to agree with everything you say.
She didn't want that kind of relationship with the King. She sincerely hoped that he would try to get to know her, and in turn she would get to know him, but even when he pretends to agree with her, it seems like he wants to impose his ideas on her, and frankly, she feels suffocated.
Aunt Rosie always told her that actions mean more than words, but she had to learn to identify when someone was sincere in both their words and actions.
Her father, for example, has always been sincere, not because his morals tell him to, but because he doesn't see the point. Yes, her dad may be sadistic and manipulative, but he is not a liar. He can be brutally honest, or he can disguise the truth, hide or omit information or be quite vague with his answers, but with her he has always been brutally honest.
When she first asked him where babies come from, he told her that there was a method in the human world, but in hell sinners couldn't have children, so he had no idea where she came from. Now, how did she get to him? In a basket.
And after the King's visit, when he told her that she was a princess, she asked her father only two questions.
Would anything have changed if he had known that she was a princess?: "Definitely", her father had no problem admitting that he would have taken advantage of the situation if he had had that information. Perhaps he would have kept her hidden until he realized that no one was looking for her and raised her to hate royalty, convince her to take the throne or give it to him.
Will things change at all now?: "It depends on you", her father doesn't see the point in things changing, she is his daughter, and if she wants the King to be her father or if she wants to be a princess (they are two different things) depends exclusively on what she wants, and as long as she wants him to be part of her life, he will be there to support her.
Charlie didn't need more, her father stepped back and let her make her own decisions. But always at a respectable distance to help her if necessary.
The King seemed quite sincere in his words, but his actions tell her otherwise.
He talks about how he misses her every day, but he never did anything to find her. She wasn't hiding in a tower or some nonsense like that, she was right there, in hell, convicting with the rest of the sinners.
And he seemed sincere when he said he wanted to be part of her life, but it seems like he just wants to buy her off by giving her nice things, say he was a good father, and leave her in some room in his palace.
She can't just have her father deal with the King the way he dealt with freeloading sinners. She simply cannot eliminate the King like she did with sinners who thought she was an easy target.
She supposes she will have to put up with the King until he gets bored. But the moment he does something stupid like trying to put a fountain of champagne or a mountain of caviar in the hotel lobby, she'll kick him to the other end of Pentagram City.
👀
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speaking in tongues ::: .02.
Author’s Note: hello everyone. I apologize for such a long wait. Personal things (as some of you may know) have had to take priority like my health. I had to put a lot of projects on hold. I do hope you enjoy part two. I attempted to make it a bit longer than the others that I’ve put out to make up for it. 🥰 as usual, please refer to the masterlist for a general list of content warning for this fic, and I will post part specific below.
Content Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content, dubcon, dub/noncon touching, fingering, groping, invasion of privacy, violence, mentions of trauma/sexual abuse/physical abuse, bratty!cashmere, cat and mouse games, gaslighting, emotional manipulation… fun stuff.
part two
i’m standing here until you make me move
Snapping his fingers, a golden portal appeared behind Adam before he stepped through it still carrying Cashmere. She took her fists, pounding his back, demanding still to be put down. Adam only seemed to offer a mocking reply by raising his voice an octave and mimicking her comments. This only seemed to enrage Cashmere more as she began kicking her legs and intensifying her hits to his back.
“Fucking hell!” he snapped at her.
“Satan in Hell,” she snapped. “Put me DOWN!”
Adam tossed her onto the couch. He pulled off his mask, throwing it to the floor before walking away from her. “Don’t fucking say I didn’t do anything for you,” he complained, loudly as he walked into the other room.
Cashmere sighed, moving her fingers through her hair. She looked around… Where was she? It looked like a fairly average apartment that any living person would have, but not one in Hell. A loud slurp disrupted her thoughts as she turned to look at Adam, standing in the entryway with a drink in hand… drinking loudly.
“Where are we?”
Adam pulled the straw from his lips before leaning against the wall. “My place.”
“In Heaven?”
“Fuck no,” Adam scoffed. “I wouldn’t bring demonic scum like you to that paradise.”
Rolling her eyes, Cashmere pushed up from the couch to sit up. “You have an apartment in Hell?”
“Embassy,” he corrected. “It’s my temporary place.”
“So why here?”
Sighing, he set the drink in his hand down on the table in front of the couch. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do you enjoy getting assaulted?”
Her eyes narrowed.
“What?” he snapped, annoyance crossing his expression. “You sure seemed to like trying to fight a man three times your size who was trying to grope on you.”
“Satan help me,” she groaned. “How long were you there? You saw all that?!”
“I told you,” he replied as his voice went flat. “Long enough.”
She closed her eyes for a moment before letting out a sigh of frustration. She stood up from the couch and decided that she would just leave before she was caught in another argument with this man…angel? Whatever. She tried to move past him before his arm shot out and stopped her from passing him.
“You’re not going anywhere.”
“Fuck you,” she said, shoving his arm down.
“You got a filthy, fucking mouth on you,” he sneered.
“Fuck. You.”
She managed to push past him but didn’t make it far before Adam snatched her by her hair and tugged her back. She yelped as tears burned at the corner of her eyes.
“Do I have your attention now?”
He was uncomfortably close to her now as his breath brushed against her ear. She tried moving away but he only tugged harder causing her scalp to burn.
“Are you going to be a good girl and listen?”
Her face fell. “…yes.”
He tugged on her hair again, causing her to wince. “I don’t believe you,” he hissed into her ear. His free hand slipped to grasp her waistline before forcefully guiding her toward the wall of his apartment. The grip tightened as he pressed his chest against her back, forcing her chest to push against the wall. Cashmere turned her head to the side, catching a glimpse of Adam smirking from behind her. “I’ll ask again,” he whispered. “Are you going to be a good girl and listen?”
She wasn’t sure what he was asking as a response. Her eyes darted away toward the white wall. Anything to avoid his gaze at this point. Anxiety began filling her chest, wondering just what she could do in this instance, against an Angel? Nothing. He could kill her easily if he truly wanted to… and permanently. It was a well-known fact that Angelic steel could permanently rid Hell of any sinner.
Adam’s other hand finally let go of her hair, but it joined his other hand gripping her waist. He used his size alone to pin her against the wall now. She was stuck. Squirming, she attempted to slither her way out from him and the wall, but it only seemed to cause him to tighten his grip.
“I want to hear you say it.”
She scoffed. “Say what?”
“That you’re going to be a good girl and listen.”
Cashmere cursed under her breath before scowling at Adam. “I’m not indulging in your sick fantasy.”
“You wouldn’t be able to handle me,” he teased. “So don’t flatter yourself.”
Offense flashed over her eyes almost as if she took what he said as a challenge. Couldn’t handle him? Was he joking? She glanced at him over her shoulder, shooting a deadly glare at the sick smirk he wore on his face. His golden eyes were still fixed on her as he moved impossibly close.
“Say it.”
“...no.”
Chuckling, Adam’s hands moved further down before squeezing her hips. “All you women are the same,” he commented. “Fucking little, bratty teases.”
“I-” she paused. “I’m not teasing.”
Remaining silent, Adam’s hands slipped past the edge of her skirt before toying with the fabric. Her breath quickened as his fingertips brushed against her bare thighs. Goosebumps spread across her skin before Adam chuckled. His fingertips moved up her thigh, slipping under her skirt.
“L-let go,” she hissed, trying to squirm away.
“No.”
She didn’t understand what his end goal was. He couldn’t possibly want such a filthy sinner. Not after all the insults he seemed to hurl her way. His hands brushed against her panties as they slipped under the elastic. Excitement blossomed in her chest and she hated her body for practically begging to be touched.
His hands slipped her underwear about midway down her legs. “Tell me you want it,” he whispered as his left moved between her legs and brushed his knee against her bare core.
A strangled gasp moved past her lips. Her mind went fuzzy. “But,” she whispered. “I’m a sinner.”
“I’m already in Heaven,” Adam snorted. “I can fuck whatever pussy I want.”
Satan’s left tit, he was going to go through with this… Cashmere felt another jolt of excitement shudder throughout her body, cursing herself for almost enjoying this… almost.
“Let's see,” he whispered, his lips against her ear. “What gets you going…”
One hand slipped between her legs as the other moved up to grope her breast. He pinched her clit between his fingers causing her to gasp again. He slowly slipped two fingers against her dripping core, making sure both fingers were coated in her juices.
She squirmed at his touch as soft pants left her lips. Her voice stuttered, “A-Adam…”
He hummed in response before plunging his two coated fingers into her. Her body tensed for a moment before adjusting quickly. He nipped at her ear as he curled her fingers against her, forcing her to clench. A gasp left her lips, bracing herself against the wall.
The rough pads of his fingers probably formed from years of playing guitar only gave way to delicious friction as she felt her juices slip down her legs. Her body squirmed as her legs clenched.
Adam tutted. “Nah uh,” he teased, using his knee to keep her legs apart.
His pace intensified.
“A-Adam,” she managed to say between breathy pants.
His tone mocked her voice as he increased his pace. The coil in her gut was winding tighter as she felt the palm of his hand press against her clit, causing her to moan again. Wetness pooled in his palm before his fingers were scissored inside of her.
“You wanna cum?” he whispered into her ear.
He suddenly slowed to a tormenting pace. “Adam please.”
“Use your words.”
She wanted to glare at him but her body wouldn’t allow her to move before tried to move her hips against his hand. His free hand managed to find its way back to her hair and yanked her head back. A pained yelp left her lips but she stilled her movements.
“Please,” she managed to get out in a desperate tone. “…please let me cum, Adam…
An audible groan left his lips before the pace of his fingers became unrelenting. Cries of his name tumbled from her lips as her legs began quaking. How such a Holy man’s touch could be so sinful, Cashmere could not understand.
She cried out his name one last time before pleasure electrified her skin and spread throughout her body. Her legs shook again, losing their strength so Adam had to keep her on her feet. He slowly removed his fingers before she felt her juices dripping down her legs.
He chuckled before taking his two fingers and forcing them into her mouth. “Be a good girl,” he teased. “And clean the mess you made.”
For a brief moment, Cashmere sputtered, struggling for air before quickly adjusting. Her tongue circled his fingers, tasting herself on them. A soft moan managed past her lips before he removed his fingers.
Adam pulled away, letting her stumble a bit but managed to steady herself against the wall.
Quickly, Cashmere pulled up her underwear and readjusted her skirt. Words failed her. Her eyes darted up to him before falling back to the floor. What could she say? It’s not like anyone would believe this happened. “…I should go home.”
Confusion filled his golden hues. “What the fuck? Why?”
“…this never should’ve happened.”
“Are you saying you didn’t want it now because you sure changed your mind fast—”
She closed her eyes in frustration. “You’re an Angel, Adam.”
“…so what? I can fuck whoever I want,” he said.
“I’m a demon, you idiot.”
“I’m not following,” Adam countered. “What part of I fuck whoever I want, don’t you understand?”
Cashmere stared at the Angel in front of her with her mouth agape. Was he serious?
“I-I’m going home.”
He seemed to back down before letting out a frustrated sigh. “Just fucking wait a second,” he said quickly. He took a few steps away from her before raking his fingers through his hair again. “Just stay here. Until you’ve sobered up.”
Confusion filled her face.
“You need to sober up,” he said, shooting a glare in her direction. “Some fucking freak could take advantage-”
“What the fuck do you think you just did?!”
“You didn’t fucking say no,” he snapped back. “You’re just pissed that you fucking enjoyed it.”
Her mouth shut.
He was right.
As disgusting as he was, she hated to admit that she had enjoyed that…
“…where should I stay?”
Adam sighed again before turning and motioning her to follow him. She followed him into a bedroom… it was clear it was his bedroom. Her eyes fell to the floor before Adam tossed a shirt to her. She glared at him briefly before noticing it was a band shirt.
“Wear that. Sleep here. Leave me the fuck alone,” he said before turning to head back into the living room.
Sighing, she waited for Adam to leave before shutting the door and stripping off her clothes. She slipped on the band tee that managed to cover just above her knees. Grimacing, she inspected the bedroom. It was clear he was a bachelor with how messy he was and the trash just strewn about. Sighing, she climbed into the bed and quickly shut the light off.
“Goodnight,” she mumbled mostly to herself.
The screams from the street managed to jar Cashmere awake as she sat up in bed and grimaced. Perhaps she had too much to drink and snort last night. Her head was practically spinning now. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around trying to remember where she was…
“Oh fuck.”
That’s right, Adam had snatched her up and brought her here the night before.
Her fingers pushed the stray strands of hair from her face, straining her ears for any sound, any movement from outside the bedroom. Snoring. He was still asleep. She forced herself out of the bed grabbing her shoes and her clothes. She would have to make a break for it.
Her hand came to the doorknob, slowly turning it and gently pulling the door open. Her eyes caught a glimpse of Adam still snoring from the couch before sneaking to his front door and silently slipping out of his apartment. A sigh fell from her lips, relieved she escaped without being detected.
“I’m going home.”
She pulled out her cell phone and saw a slew of texts from Cherrybomb and Angeldust. She responded to the group chat that she was fine and heading home and she would explain later.
Cashmere managed to make it to her apartment before reaching into her purse to grab her apartment key. “Home free,” she told herself, sighing with relief as she started opening the door.
“Bitch!”
Her head shot up as she noticed Angeldust rushing toward her. “…oh no.”
“Where the fuck did you go!”
“Angel - it’s fine I’m just going to go change,” she said, walking into her apartment but he managed to sneak his way past her and into the apartment as well.
He threw himself onto her bed before tilting his head at her. His eyes narrowed before the corner of his lips curled upward.
“Angel…”
“…who was it! Spill it!”
Groaning, she threw her clothes and purse to the floor. “Whatever you’re thinking it’s not true.”
Angeldust scoffed before sitting up on her bed. “That’s not your shirt, babe.”
A lump formed in her throat. Fuck.
“…it was nothing,” she hissed.
“You ran off with some fucker. Him?”
Glaring, she crossed her arms. “I fucking hate how observant you are.”
He shrugged. “A gift! Now tell me.”
“We didn’t fuck. Just screwed around a little,” she replied, shaking her head. “It should’ve never happened. It was a mistake. I was too high to go home so he let me crash. I left before he woke up.”
He looked unimpressed. “That bad?”
“Sure,” she was too frustrated to continue this conversation.
“Whatever you say~”
Rolling her eyes, Cashmere made her way into the bathroom and stripped off Adam’s band t-shirt. She inspected her reflection in the mirror before cutting on the water in the sink and splashing her face with cold water.
A nightmare.
This was just a nightmare.
Her phone began buzzing. A groan left her lips before she snatched up the phone, assuming it was either Cherrybomb calling to tease her or even worse - Valentino to demand she come into the strip club.
“Yeah?”
“Morning to you too, doll face.”
Her face paled.
“How the fuck did you get my number?!”
Adam snorted on the other line. “You’re the stupid ass that left her phone out and unlocked.”
“You went through my phone?!”
“Nice nudes in there by the way.”
How could she even begin to form a response to that? She pinched the bridge of her nose before taking a deep breath to calm her growing irritation.
“I’m not even responding-what do you want, asshole!”
“You fucking left.”
Was this serious? “Of course, I left,” she said, confused. “What were we going to do? Cuddle?”
He scoffed. “I want you to know I was being nice by letting you crash with me after you got fucking high as fuck,” he countered. “And you just leave? No fucking thank you? Nothing!”
This was serious.
Cashmere rubbed her eyes. “Being nice? That’s the bare minimum!”
“You were a fucking cock tease!”
“Tease?!”
“You were fucking putty in my hands,” he hissed. “Couldn’t even return the favor. A fucking tease.”
She couldn’t find her words. The tone of his voice was similar to the night before and sent shivers down her spine. She cursed under her breath. Was this reality?
“Where the fuck did you go?”
A sigh fell from her lips as she tried to center herself. How someone could be this dense, she had no idea… Clicking her tongue, she glanced at her bathroom door and made sure to lower her voice. She could not afford Angeldust finding out she had an Angel on the phone, and not just any Angel - Adam.
“I went home.”
“You didn’t even wake me up.”
“What the fuck were we going to do? Cuddle? Christ, Adam.”
He scoffed on the other line. “Don’t use the Lord’s name in vain.”
“I can’t do this right now,” she said, rubbing her temples. “I’m taking my shower.”
“Fucking fine,” he said. “Just come to the embassy when you’re done.”
She hung up on him.
She could not handle his bullshit now.
Her phone lit up with a text that said: did you just fucking hang up on me?
Choosing to ignore it, Cashmere turned her attention toward her shower, cutting on the water and making sure the temperature was as hot as she could stand. She slipped off the rest of her clothes before letting her hair down. Stepping in the shower, she let out another breath before stepping under the hot stream of water.
She let the water slip over her head and down her body. The heat offered some relief to her tense muscles. How the fuck had she ended up in this situation? Her fingers raked through her wet hair.
Did she even want to go back to the embassy and face him?
It wasn’t as if she had a choice. He had paid off Valentino, who believed this was some prostitution setup - no questions asked. The entire situation was beginning to weigh on Cashmere as she couldn’t be honest with her two closest friends.
And now?
Now, Adam had managed to worm his way into her pants, or at the very least his fingers between her legs.
Disgust filled her gut. Was she that desperate? Did she make it that easy for him?
She recalled her life when she was alive. While she could not remember everything now that she was dead, she could recall flashes and small glimpses into why she was such a disaster.
Prostitution had kept her off the streets, but at what cost?
She had disgraced her family, despite leaving and joining the profession for the sake of their survival. She had been battered, beaten, and bruised throughout her career by not only “customers” but by police and even other prostitutes.
Over the years, it hardened her. Numbed her.
“Cashmere?”
It was Angeldust, knocking on the bathroom door.
“Yeah?” She called out over the sound of the shower.
“You good?”
Pausing, her eyes fell to the drain. Was she?
“I’m fine!”
Straining her ears, she heard Angeldust retreat from the door as she slowly cut off the water. Snatching the towel from the rack, she wrapped the plush fabric around her body.
Her phone screen lit up again.
Another message… from Adam.
A sigh fell from her lips before scanning the text. “You can’t fucking ignore me forever?” She scoffed and turned off her phone in response. “Don’t fucking tell me what to do.”
Walking into the embassy, Cashmere finally decided to turn her phone back on. She awoke to several messages to log her up on her phone from the night before - and she was right. A flood of messages from Adam filled her phone, a weird mixture of gaslighting and compliments and a sprinkle of disgust was an ongoing theme in each message.
She mumbled “idiot” under her breath before she reached his office and raised a hand to knock. But the door swung open.
She halfway expected him as she opened her mouth with a quip but quickly her eyes went wide as a fellow dancer left, adjusting her clothes. Cashmere stepped to the side observing before walking inside.
He was sitting in his chair as she shut the door. With her back turned, she felt his golden eyes on her - as if trying to burn a home through her.
A game… she suspected.
“…aren’t you supposed to be keeping a low profile?”
“I told you,” he said, loudly. “I do whatever the fuck I want.”
She stepped into the office and shut the door before finally turning to look at him. He was adjusting his clothes and she could only imagine what had taken place just moments before she knocked. She studied his expression for a brief second before noting the smirking just barely ghosting over his lips.
He was playing a game.
She took a seat and kept her expression even.
“So what now?”
His golden hues narrowed at her blase response. “What now?”
Cashmere nodded. “What are we doing now?”
“Don’t you wanna know who that was?”
“Not really,” she said, shrugging. “I know enough about her from the club to know that you may want to get checked afterward-”
“Don’t be a fucking smart ass.”
Cashmere merely shrugged in response, noting the annoyance in his voice was growing. If he wanted to play this type of game with her, she would make him learn that she was ten times better at it.
“So I’ll ask again,” she continued. “What are we doing now?”
Adam slumped into his chair. His eyes scanned over his paperwork before glancing back at her. “She was boring,” he commented, offhandedly. “Talked too much.”
Her gaze cut to him. “Okay?”
“Okay?” he repeated as his brows fell into a scowl. “That’s all you have to fucking say?!”
Cashmere tilted her head to the side.
“You are so fucking infuriating!”
She glanced down at her nails, inspecting the color carefully. “Sucks when people play mind games, doesn’t it?”
His fists slammed against the table, catching her attention briefly.
“Are you seriously going to sit there and throw a tantrum when you snooped through my phone and thought bringing a coworker here would upset me? I’m not an idiot,” she said, raking her finger through his hair. “This entire trip is just an excuse for you to torment a sinner here and try to get your scrawny dick wet.”
Adam fell silent as his eyes narrowed.
Cashmere sat back in her seat. “Play stupid games,” she said. “Win stupid prizes.”
His fists tightened. His knuckles turned white.
Satisfaction was evident on her face, knowing that she had pegged him exactly for what he was trying to do. “Now if you’re done being an insufferable wannabe rockstar,” she continued, turning her attention back to inspecting her nails. “We can work on what you were sent here to do.”
Adam opened his mouth to speak.
Cashmere reached across the table and snatched one of the pieces of paper scattered about. She wanted to look over the notes that he had supposedly taken during their last meet-up, but when she looked upon the paper…
“Are you fucking joking?”
Adam scowled again at her. “What?!”
“This is fucking stick figures fucking!”
He looked away from her.
“You didn’t even take notes?!”
Adam scoffed. “I have a brilliant memory. I don’t need notes. All I have to say is bitches like you deserve to be sinners-”
“Aren’t you supposed to understand why!?”
“Does it even matter?”
Cashmere balled her fists. “You know what,” she said, huffing. “It doesn’t to me. But won’t it get you into trouble up there?”
“I’m the original dick,” he snapped. “I’ll never get into trouble.”
She didn’t respond. She didn’t have to as her expression slipped into a judgemental stare.
“I don’t have to fucking answer to the likes of you,” he scowled. “Don’t you fucking judge me!”
“Men are always so sensitive,” she added, sighing.
His golden hues narrowed once again.
“What?” she questioned, leaning back in her chair. When she received no response, she let out a frustrated sigh. “If you’re an example of the angels in Heaven… I would rather be thrown into Hellfire. I’ve dealt with enough misogynist, pig men while I was alive to serve me an entire lifetime of suffering.”
She hadn’t noticed Adam standing up from his desk and slowly making his way toward her. As she continued to rant about pig men, Adam stood behind her chair before quickly grabbing her by the back of the throat, lifting her from her chair, and slamming her onto the desk.
A yelp of pain erupted from the sinner as she felt the weight of his body press against her much smaller frame. She squirmed, trying to break him of his grip but the sheer size he had on her alone - he would overpower her.
“Let me go you fuckface-”
His hand left her neck and slid into her hair before gripping her locks tightly. “You’ve been acting like a fucking spoiled brat all day,” he hissed, leaning into her ear. “Tell me you don’t want this… and I’ll disappear.”
Fuck him. Fuck him.
The tone of his voice sent shivers all the way down her spine before causing her thighs to clench together. Her mind drifted back to that moment of weakness in his apartment.
“Fuck you!”
His mocking laughter filled her ears.
“I’m not hearing no.”
“Let me go or I’ll scream!”
“I’d prefer if you did.”
Cashmere glared at him in response.
“Now be a good kitty cat and listen…”
She scowled under her breath. Was he mocking her demonic, lioness form now?
“I’m not a cat-ow!”
He had tugged on her tail earning a yelp. “Lion… tiger… aren’t they all just oversized house cats?” His gloved fingers slid down the length of her tail. “But it seems I’ve found a way to make you listen.” His fingers grasped her tail again and immediately he sensed Cashmere’s body tense.
“Now,” he said gently. “You’re going to show me exactly why you were sent to Hell in the first place.”
“Let go-” she gasped mid sentence as he tugged on her tail.
“Don’t pretend you don’t like this,” he scoffed before he let go of her tail and the free hand slipped up her skirt.
Cashmere was quiet for a moment before quickly elbowing him in the gut, sending him into a string of curses. Wincing at him tugging her hair before letting her go, she quickly moved back to her feet.
A mixture and crimson and black glazed over her eyes as her fangs grew longer. “Don’t. Touch. Me.”
A hand raked through his shaggy, dark hair before his lips curled into a sneer. His tongue ran along his lower lip. He took a step toward her.
Cashmere hissed at him.
He opened his mouth to respond but Cashmere took her clawed hand and swiped at his face before Adam lunged forward, snatching her wrist. Quickly, she swiped with her opposite hand but Adam stopped her again. Cashmere tugged, trying to break his grip but instead Adam used his size to pin her against the desk again.
His lips curled into a sneer. “Nice try, kitty cat.”
“Fuck you!”
He leaned in closer. “Gladly.”
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel adam#hazbin hotel Adam x original character#hazbin hotel Adam x oc#Adam x original character#Adam x oc#hazbin hotel x original character#hazbin hotel adam x reader#hazbin hotel adam x you#adam x reader#Adam x you#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel x you#hazbin hotel fandom#hazbin hotel fanfiction#fanfic#dividers by cafekitsune
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Yang bringing up Tai in this conversation was great for two reasons.
The first being that it ties into why they are even there having the conversation in the first place. It highlights Yang's responsibility as a sister as well, as Ruby's struggle with not knowing how to ask for help. And both of these things can be traced back to their childhoods; where they lost one parent to an unknown fate, and the other to his grief.
Tai was right in front of them, but his feelings at the time were so big that they took priority over his kids needs. And that sort of complex trauma sticks with a person. For Yang, it became the responsibility to look after her baby sister (something she prioritized and wanted distance from at the same time), and for Ruby, it became an instilled belief that asking for help makes her a burden. That it was better to carry it all alone than risk stressing any of her caretakers with more than they were already dealing with.
The second thing, is it pretty much confirms where the Relic of Choice is? Yang, when speaking of Tai's absence, asks: "what's more important than here"? And that's the only loose thread left, isn't it?
Atlas is gone, Vale suffered a second attack, and the refugees of both fled to Vacuo. Mistral is the only other kingdom still standing, but Salem already has their relic. So she doesn't have any need to go back and bother them. But Tai is still in Patch, he's not joining the fight, because there is only one thing more important than protecting the Sword of Destruction... and that's protecting the Crown of Choice.
Not to mention Patch, by definition, is:
(noun) a piece of cloth or other material used to mend or strengthen a torn or weak point.
(verb) mend or strengthen (fabric or an item of clothing) by putting a piece of material over a hole or weak point in it.
And while Vale specifically references a valley, the name is a homophone. It shares the same sound as words with different spellings and meanings. Namely with Vail: a verb meaning to take off or lower (one's hat or crown) as a token of respect or submission; and Veil: a cloth headpiece specifically designed to conceal, cover, or disguise.
Which is just one of those multilayered poetries that RWBY really loves. A valley (or veil) that conceals the crown of choice beneath a Patch.
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A friend who, unfortunately, likes JC defended him a lot to me when I was first watching the donghua then read the novels. Perfectly honest, I thought he was a loser but my friend kept defending him for being able to pull the Jiang sect together after the LP massacre but...I don't know? Did he really? wasn't it more WWX's reputation that pulled the sect up and high? Is JC actually a good leader? I have trouble seeing that
Hi anon 😊
Ah yes, I have been there as well unfortunately!
Although I was respectful of their opinion, it seems we no longer talk haha 😆 Perhaps it was something to do with the time they claimed JC hunting down and torturing innocent people who used guidao was "just a baseless rumour" - to which I casually responded with proof it was certainly not a rumour. I mean, JC literally encouraged JL to kill them and feed them to his dog for a start 😂 I don't think that was a joke in the slightest lmao. Honestly, I didn't expect them to take offence at the evidence proving otherwise, since we enjoyed discussing the novel and debating such things anyway! But, hey-ho!
Hmm, the whole "restoring the Jiang sect to its former glory" debate is a major source of discourse between MDZS fans! I mean, JC did join forces with the Twin Jades of Lan and launch a surprise attack on the Wens in order to secure their confiscated swords. Which I have to say, I always found so hypocritical and two faced of him to do... You know, considering he not only unjustly blamed LWJ for everything that happened to LP, but even wished WWX had left him and JZX to die in the cave prior to the attack as well! And he calls WWX shameless...
But even so, JC seems to have worked hard in the three months WWX was missing. Attacking the Wens supervisory offices and hunting down WC alongside LWJ and the respective cultivators under their command. Even WWX praised his efforts when they were all reunited. So credit where credit is due, I guess.
That being said, it works both ways! WWX's efforts should not be ignored either - which I often find the case whenever JC is praised for his accomplishments regarding the Jiang sect. WWXs new cultivation path is what helped them gain an upper hand during the Sunshot campaign, he garnered much praise and admiration during the war - it was only in the aftermath that people began to turn against him, especially seeing the obvious lack of loyalty or protection from JC. But WWXs guidao most certainly helped rebuild the sect's reputation and enticed new disciples as well. JC even gave his blessing for WWX to showcase his cultivation during the Mount Baifeng night-hunt, in order to recruit even more disciples! So I agree with you, WWX's new cultivation path was one of the driving forces in helping elevate the sect to its former glory, perhaps even beyond.
As for whether JC is a good sect leader? Honestly? No.
Evidence would suggest otherwise, in my opinion. Some like to pretend JC is the beloved sect leader of Yunmeng - but that's far from the case. He's made the sect less approachable, closed its doors to the public and scared away those seeking help on matters he doesn't deem worthy of his attention.
The general public seem frightened of him because of his awful personality and the fact they have witnessed him torturing innocent people. His own disciples seem to feel like they have to walk on eggshells around him and be careful of his famous temper. He seems more focused on pushing JL beyond his limits and imposing his own insecurities on the poor kid than actually helping others with their problems. When he's not doing that, he's off hunting down his latest unsuspecting victims to torture and do god knows what to!
So no, I don't consider him to be a particularly good sect leader, his priorities do not align with what I (or I would assume most others) would consider as such. A great leader is able to get along with others and inspire their disciples. They should also be able to secure backing from the general public by being present and approachable when issues arise.
Let's put it this way - LWJ was given the title 'Hanguang-jun' a title befitting of how the public perceive him, righteous and willing to help others. JC also has a title, that of 'Sandu Shengshou', which is in relation to a Buddhist saying regarding the three poisons - the root of all turmoil. Certainly not a good public image to have! Even the general tone of anyone talking about him isn't overly respectful - people rarely call him by his courtesy name unless they are addressing him directly. Otherwise, it's his birth name, which of course, is highly disrespectful unless you are very familiar with said person. MXTX made a deliberate choice for the public to call him 'Jiang Cheng' instead, so it is certainly significant and shows us that he is not well respected or liked by the general public and even other cultivators! This is in the first few chapters as well! All in order to set the tone of how JC is perceived. I mean, even the narrator (which is of course a stand alone entity/person and not WWX as many wrongly assume) calls him JC instead 😂
Overall, I think JC did put effort into building his sect up again, but WWX certainly deserves equal credit for that as well. That being said, it doesn't alter the fact he's not a very good leader in the sense I would consider, and I think that's been made more than apparent in the text as well.
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Let's try to paint a picture of our man based on what he approves
Note/Warning: this is a ramble about his approval list.
This is nothing new, I just feel like writing it up.
I copied the list of approvals from BG3 wiki for Act 1 and Act 2. Generalised the trigger for approval and here we go lolll Of course, this is how I see those triggers, you don't necessarily agree with me. If you think differently, that's fine. This is not rocket science, nobody needs to go boom.
The number on the top is the total for entries. It doesn't account for how many approval points it gives. Very occasionally, I may have some triggers sitting in 2 category, but none sits in 3.
If I filter out all the 1 approvals, things look interesting.
This is the first one that he gives >1 approval. Our boy wants to help himself first for sure. lolll
This is the first +5. Our boy probably appreciate people with the same level of survival will plus the ability to fight for that survival.
And if you side with him to help/let him survive? Brownie points.
Going further down the list, things that gives >1 approvals, are all similar or adjacent to all these things mentioned above. The most important thing for our boy is his own survival. He really appreciates some kindred spirit. He likes to have "a kin".
This one is quite cute. Either he appreciates the player rooting for their ally, either he appreciates the increased survival chance by keeping a good fighter in the team. I can see he has his hopes up when watching this camp scene and nodding to himself in his head.
Of course we have these ones where the play shows trust and a strong will to keep him. He is happy when his alliance and protection is strongly with the player, very understandable.
Again, very understandably, he likes it when the player respects and shows care for him. After these, more >1 approvals are related to getting his scars deciphered by Raphael and promise help to kill Caz.
Now, people, take a good look at this whole list of approval on BG3 wiki. Does the list of approval paint a man that:
puts his own survival and interest on the top priority
everyone comes as an after thought
well aware of the value of keeping the leader (player) close
happy to gain favour for alliance and protection
very good with his looks and tactics
being bitter about the world
more than happy with personal gain in terms of power and any other things
has a wretched idea of "fun"
No? Look at them again. lol
I love him little shit.
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Mike's "Will Voice". - An Essay by me.
If you’re a byler you know about the “Will Voice '' . But if you somehow don’t or you’re new, the “Will Voice" is the voice that Mike uses when he is talking to Will and ONLY Will. Normally Mike is a little abrasive and defensive to most people when he is talking to them. But when talking to Will, his voice is soft and quiet, just above a whisper, gentle.
Before we get into it, I think you should just know that the “Will voice” isn’t just something Byler’s made up! The directors tell Finn (the actor that plays Mike) to use a “special voice” when talking to Noah (The actor that plays Will) when filming.
DISCLAIMER - i actually didnt think this was going to be this long so sorry in advance but here are my thought i hope you enjoy! i love you!
“It was a seven, the Demogorgon. It got me.” - Season 1
One of the VERY FIRST SCENES in the show is Mike using his “Mike voice” Even if he really doesn't have to say anything at all. After Karen tells everybody to leave and all of the boys are hopping on their bikes to go home, Will is the only one left behind with Mike. Will admits to Mike that in the campaign they're playing, the Demogorgon got to him and killed him.
Something about this scene is just so…. The look of understanding, the nod. Mike is just more gentle with will than anyone else.
Right before this he was just arguing will Dustin about weather his sister is cool or not but with Will it’s different.
Unfortunately, since Will really isn’t in the whole rest of the season, because yknow he’s in a whole other dimension there aren't a lot of other scenes where Mike is using his “Will voice” However, Mike was the person who wanted to find will the most behind maybe Joyce. Saying that he “was the only one who cared about Will”, so that is something.
“Crazy together.” - Season 2
In my opinion, season 2 is like beak soft byler. The first season 2 byler moment was..
The Arcade Scene
As soon as Mike snaps Will out of his trance, his vision, whatever you want to call it, he goes right back to Will's comforting voice and tries to make it feel better and distracts him with a dig dug.
In the next episode, it Halloween. And we ALL know what happened on Halloween night of 1987.
Will’s episode on halloween
When Will has a bad vision, who is the first name he calls? Mike. Not Lucas, Not Dustin, not even Max. Mike. Not anyone else but Mike. And who was the first one to find Will and the first one to comfort him? Micheal Fucking Wheeler. And he was using the same soft voice he always does when talking to Will, barley over a whisper. Not to mention that Mike wouldn't let anyone touch Will but himself after Will snapped out of his episode.
Talk in Mike’s Basement Scene
After Will had this awful episode, Mike takes Will and only Will back to his house. Will rambles and rants about how he feels stuck and Mike? He is attentive, sweet, listening, letting him get all of his words out. I’ve noticed with other people Mike can come off like he’s abrasive and harsh but with Will he is nothing close to that.
In this conversation also consists of Mike helping Will express his feeling by finishes his sentences for him when he just can’t get his words out. In the few times Mike does speak, he does not break out of the gentle voice and literally never breaks his gaze from Will, not once.
EVEN WHEN MIKE TALKS ABOUT EL HE TALKS IN HIS WILL VOICE. AND THE ONLY REASON MIKE BROUGHT UP EL WAS FOR WILL’S BENEFIT.
And then the most iconic Byler line in Stranger Things history, “If we’re both going crazy, we’ll go crazy together, right?” “Yeah, crazy together.” So gentle, so sweet, so wholesome.
The hallway scene
Mike immediately notices something off with Will and has to make sure everything is okay.
Side note: even when Will isn't with Mike and the party, Mike will literally do anything he can to help Will. That’s his only priority at the moment.
Will’s bedroom scene
Even when Will is talking about “Him” Mike still reminds him that Will is a good person, calling him a “super spy” Mike is doing absolutely anything he can to comfort Will and make him feel any better. (P.s. this moment is so wholesome I love it.)
And then the “yeah, yeah I really do” The PRIME example of “Will Voice” The gentleness, the voice, the look, the nod, the reassurance, AND THEN THE REACH FOR THE HAND.
Hospital Scene (Will wakes up)
Will wakes up and Mike is obviously right there (‘cause he slept in the chair next to the bed, WHICH IS LIKE MY FAVORITE BYLER MOMENT OF ALL TIME) and asks if Will is “hurting again”, Mike keeps his eyes steady on Will. His only focus is Will right now. He keeps his voice soft and he asks will things to make sure he understands and that he is hearing what Will is going through right now.
Mike recalling how they met
Even though the poor boys voice is shaky because he is literally trying (and failing) to hold back tears, it’s still soft and reassuring.
“It’s not my fault you don't like girls!” -Season 3
The movie theater scene
This scene is one of my favs from Season 3. Mike is the first and only person to realize something is off with Will and say something to make sure he’s okay. The "you okay?” and “you sure?” are so gentle and soft. It reminds me a lot of someone jumping at a scary part in a movie and their partner wrapping their arm around them and asking if they’re okay.
NOT TO MENTION THE NOT SO SUBTLE LIP GLANCES.
(Also the little gay panic Will has after Mike ask if he’s okay and the blush on Mike’s cheeks before)
The scene right before the fight scene
Mike immediately notices Will is upset after Mike makes his “joke” and he goes back to his voice that always gets Will and tries to convince him that they (him and Lucas) do really want to finish the campaign.
The fight scene
Mike IMMEADLEY goes back to his will voice after he drops the bomb shell because he know he fucked up and he did it BIG TIME. The big difference between Mike’s “Will Voice” in Season 2 and Season 3 is that in Season 2 he was really using that voice with Will because he knew that it was comforting to him but now in season 3 he uses it because he knows Will will fall for it.
(Also you know how Max says to El that Mike will come crawling back to El in no time? The only person he came crawling back to apologizing was Will.)
“Get away from the door” Scene
@myname1sca1 brought up a great point! The scene where Max is trying talk to Billy through the door, Will has a feeling that “He’s here” and Mike turns and say to Max to get away from the door a=in a gentle, quiet, soft voice and when she doesn't listen, he turns away from will at screaming at her do get away from the door. He was only using that voice because he was looking at Will and dropped that voice as soon as he looked away.
The “Not possible” Scene
Toward the end of season 3, Mike realizes that he was being (in his own words) an asshole the whole season and starts caring about Will again. And when Will comes out and puts his box of D&D on the donate box, the thing he has loved since forever, Mike makes sure that he knows he is giving it away.
Will knows he’ll just use Mike’s when he visits the won’t join another party. That’s not possible.
(Plus the look on Mikes face after Will says “not possible” is adorable.)
"I didn't say it." "You didn't have to."
Will's bedrooms scene
OMFG THIS SCENE
Immediately Mike is relaxed. His voice low and calm and he lightheaded. The "You didn't have to" AND THE SMILE. This is a COMPLETE contrast to has he is around El in this part of the season. When with her, he is all tease and feel like he can never say the right thing.
Also, the absolute adoration for Will in his voice. When he says "It's Hawkins, it's not the same without you."
You can also really tell that Mike is really confiding in Will and letting his guard down which he never really does with anyone. Including El. Especially with the whole line "I don't know what's going to happen next." And if you know Mike Wheeler he never tells ANYONE that he is wrong or that he doesn't know what's going on. So, the fact that he feels comfortable enough with Will is something.
"But you make her feel better for being different." Season 4, Vol 2
"We have to Kill him." "And we will." Scene
The MOMENT Mike finds out that Will can feel that 001 is there, he jumps back into being his reassuring, gentle self for Will. This scene reminds me a lot of the "Yeah, Yeah i really do scene for season 2.
OMG WE ARE DONE, if you made it through all of that, I love you so much. If you want to see more things like this PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me know because i love writing essays about Byler analysis!
also let me know if there's anything I missed because if i miss enough things i will gather it and but it in an update!
RESOUCES
Stanger Things I The First 8 Minutes - Series Opener [HD] (Still Watching Netflix on YouTube)
Stranger Thing 02x02 - Mike and Will 'Crazy Together' Scene (Raghaua Daroui on Youtube)
Byler compilation (Season 2-3) (GoraculGerard on Youtube)
every byler scene 1080p I Stranger Things Season 4 Vol 1 (longbttms on Youtube)
byler 1080p scene pack I Stranger Things Vol 2 (longbttms on YouTube)
@myname1sca1 's post!
people who wanted to be tagged!
@lebylershipper
@ash-the-wise
@tender-emotional-music
@wallywise
@willbyerswatch
@hearteyes-wheeler
@paloma-ascends-into-hellfire
#byler#mike wheeler#stanger things#will byers#byler endgame#byler is real#stangerthings#stranger things 4#stranger things 3#stranger things 2#stanger things 1#bylerrrrr#byler writing#bler essay#essay about byler#making everything about byler#byler analysis#byler angst#writing#sagey writes
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Trembling Essence:💙Script progress + Updates💙
Hello and welcome new followers, long time no see! I was very busy most of this month, but I am back and ready to continue from where I left off on the game! This game development post might be a bit long but I tried to condense everything! :]
"How are things going so far?":
It's going slow and steady! I haven't been able to do too much these past few weeks, however, I wrote a few parts out before I got too busy and couldn't do anything else.
I want to be very careful when it comes to spoilers but, based on your choices, some of these areas will give off immersive cozy/homelike vibes that really express Noah and the player(Y/N)'s view towards each other.
In the old 2023 script I was very new to writing so the small semi-hints of romance weren't the entire focus compared to the horror aspect but there's a better balance between both genres now and I'm still aiming for a meaningful slow burn versus it just being all over the place. :]
I liked writing them a whole bunch which lead to a lot of these taking place in the mid/end of Day 4+, they just need to be placed in specific areas that call for it. With that being said, it felt really comfy adding key details about Noah and creating meaningful sections in the game. I was even going to draw out some of the unseen script/scenes but I believe the best thing to do is give deeper lore from the [Extended Demo] first. Even though my writing style has improved I still have to fix the multiple pacing issues I wrote last year.
"Playtester's advice":
I wanted to continue working through Noah's backstory but I kept having moments where I'd get sidetracked into wanting to fix up the start of the game again. Eventually, I talked to my play testers about it and they gave me a few encouraging pointers.
To help keep my process at ease, I will fix the beginning of the game when I take breaks from writing up Noah's backstory. :]
I talked about this during early 2024 but the start of the game that leads up to the cabin is still getting reworked. I was able to get some of it fixed for the [Extended Demo] but I wasn't done.
Things are still up in the air but, I will say that I have a better view of everything than I did before. :]
Another priority that needs fixing are the backgrounds! I've improved a lot on drawing and they need to be optimized. When you first start up the game, you wake up in a holed out tree in the swamp with the choice to leave this area and possibly end up in the forest. I was going for a very immersive form of symbolism that only a few noticed but, I believe I can do a better job about this. Unfortunately I don't have any new backgrounds to show right now but maybe next week I'll have some finished up! :]
"Art process/Noah's sprite sheets":
As far as Noah sprite sheet goes, it's still in sketch mode.
I didn't draw anything since I was gone so I need to do a few warm ups before I get to them. There are some old drawing prompts I wrote down and old sketches that I never got a chance to doodle so hopefully I can get to them at some point with some attached lore. :,]
My Q&A / Ask box has been reset!
Thank you to those who have sent in asks in the past, unfortunately they all disappeared except for 1 while I was gone. I have no idea what happened but I can only guess it just got reset.
If you have any questions about Trembling Essence/Noah feel free to ask or resend them in here please. This makes it easier for me to see and answer accordingly! I would really like to hear from you guys!
This is all I have to share so far, Thank you to everyone for the continued support and patience while I was gone! I was ready to accept the interest for this game to fade out and coming back to see that it didn't happen makes me happy, I really appreciate it. :,]
#te updates#male yandere#visual novel#dating sim#yandere#illustration#digital art#murder sim#game development#horror game#art#artwork#artists on tumblr#indie game#otome#drawing#romance#anime drawing#anime art#vndev
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✨
#Ash's ramblings#you ever just take a look at yourself and it's like#it kinda looks like 85% of my problems lead back to my complete lack of a sense of self worth#and you go well maybe you really could use some therapy. but also it's 4.30pm on a thursday#and it's the end of term and you really have to finish that presentation and study for that exam and complete these 3 essays#and start on the other essays and hope the writing test tomorrow will go well and what about the speaking exam on Monday#that is online but the presentation is on site and there's only half an hour between and that's not enough time to get to uni actually#and. all the other things that take priority#and also therapy is kinda expensive and you already don't have hobbies bc you can't afford any classes and without classes you won't stick#to anything so can you afford therapy. and if you can wouldn't it be more fun to do sth else instead#but you kinda can't anyway but. maybe. Idk. but therapy also costs time and you don't have that either#and also you're not that bad off anyway so wouldn't it kinda be overkill. kinda embarrassing to go. you're functioning and all#havent considered drastic measures in quite a while. and what if you really ARE just stupid so your sense of self worth is in fact accurate#and therapy can't actually make you like. smart or talented or whatever so. wouldn't it just be a waste of time.#and then you look back at your laptop and realise you should be studying instead of mildly spiralling on tumblr so you get back to that#and try to focus#ily all feel free to ignore me I'm just stressed#Tag ramblings#suicide mention#Like. Very mild and not directly and all but idk just in case?? Idk what counts as triggering for whom so#it's like. idly thinking about why I practically never invite ppl to my flat. oh it's bc I'm embarrassed of the way I live and#scared it won't be good enough for others#why am I so immediately forgiving and willing to acceot things that hurt me. oh it's bc if I don't ppl won't have a reason to stick around#why do I get so quietly intensely jealous when ppl do cool things and have good things happen to them. oh it's bc it makes me think#that they'll realise how very much I don't fit into that cool life they're living and I can't keep up and I'm boring and the opposite of#anything they want in their life#I do realise this is. like. a problem.#it does not make me a better friend or partner or whatever if I'm constantly occupied with negative feelings about myself that#are no one else's problems and I shouldn't make it so. so I do not but it's still there and I can't make it go away#and I'm sure it's obvious sometimes that there's SOMETHING and that's. you know. Idk where I'm going with this.
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the most wholesome thing is seeing that the wholesome post blog runner is probably one of the nicest people ever :3 i’m generally Terrified of sending asks especially to a blog that Does Things like this but seeing you talk in the tags instead of just reblogging and moving on makes you seem very friendly and approachable !!!! and i hope u know i appreciate that :] i hope you have a wonderful day and both sides of your pillow are always cool and that if you see a random cat on the sidewalk it won’t run away from U ♡
woah, META-WHOLESOME!! thank ya for the compliment, i try my best to carry out those kinds of traits i value!!!!! i’m SUPER super glad that ya did!!! THANK YOU THANK U!! always appreciating how much of an impact this lil blog has on top of appreciating u for sharing as much with me :-)
it’s always a TRIP getting to hear that something i do that i wasn’t even really mindfully doing makes all the difference?? i’m just really, REALLY grateful for all the different kinds of posts that get sent my way and seeing cool + uplifting + sentimental + OVERALL WHOLESOME posts that i express my thanks + ramble a bit in the tags haha !!
i ALSO hope you have as terrific of a day as you’re able to! and i hope you’ll enjoy seeing more posts pop up!
AND YOU’LL NEVER BELIEVE but i got new pillow cases like a week ago THAT DO JUST THAT! AND THERE’S A NEW CAT ON THE STREET WHO HANGS OUT WITH ME SOMETIMES (i’ve been planning to see if he has a microchip, but i know for a fact that the neighbors who feed all the stray cats on our street already have a cage + are well-versed in TNR, so i’ve been thinking about asking them first because the thought that someone could be out there looking for their pal is enough for me to “do it scared”) !! SO THANK U NOT ONLY FOR THE SWEET SENTIMENTS BUT ALSO FOR THE UNEXPECTED HILARITY OVER THE FACT THAT THEY’VE COME TRUE???
#and i get it!! running a gimmick blog (as i’ve heard it be described) is v v different from the other blogs i’ve got going!!#ik i’ve said it in the past but i genuinely think what makes for the lack of ambiance is the fact that i didn’t really? start this blog out#as a gimmick blog in mind?? it was kind of just for me to ‘archive’ Solidly Wholesome posts in one place#by the dates i saw/read through them + let them flow over me. because there’s already a timestamp ya know?#but the Vision was that i’d go through this blog + see that a year ago on a particular day was Important#which is still something i do when i have the the time BUT now i ALSO get sent wholesome posts!!! which WOAH#became a collective effort whether you’ve mentioned me in one post or climbing up to the triple digits now haha!!! i appreciate them all#TRULY :-)#and i’ll also admit that i don’t really remember if i kept the ask + submission channels open because i thought ‘hey maybe i’ll get one#or two someday from someone?’ or if i kinda forgot to close ‘em because i think i only block Anonymous automatically for all the blogs#i’ve got?? THAT will probs be a mystery for a long time to come if not forever BUT am glad it’s all worked out in ways i never saw coming!!#also APOLOGIES FOR NOT ONLY RAMBLING IN THE TAGS BUT THE ASK!!#Apple Pie is defs a priority for me rn and i’ve done some research + talked to my neighbors about TNR being the best bet in our area#last we spoke anyhow which was some time ago#also my parents apparently got into taking stray cats to a TNR program a few cities over so i’ll ask ‘em too probably???#BUT FIRST THING’S FIRST: checking for a microchip#10/13/2023#asks#wholesomepostarchive
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Damn,we (I) need more headcanons about Mera,she really has a good potential with dinamics and stuff
#Like she hasn't get a solid interaction with the gang#Only nendo#And that was for a fuking drug test#I know it was really meds but I don't give shit#She has more jobs than I will ever have.#And also has to take care of his lil brothers and sisters#She's such a strong girl#For not to mention she's pretty too#And that she focuses on his priorities above all#She spoke as fast as she could with Ku when he discovered his work#And the other things I already mentioned#She tried hard to pay for the school trip even with all her daily duties#Mera deserve so much#mera chisato#Saiki#Saik#the disastrous life of saiki k#saiki kusuo no ψ nan
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/stumbles, thumps, stumbles again, trips, bumps against cabinet, stumbles yet again, leans against doorway, out of breath/
I'm working on the sona reference sheet again i swear look
That's all thank you,
#No but genuinely thank you lot for being so patient :')#It mean SO much to me ^^#I also have many other wips in my folders but im working on them as well!#This sona one is one of my top priorities right now#It's been rather long overdue :')#Again thank you lot so much for being patient! It means a lot to me and i really appreciate you all ^^ 💕#Best wishes and take care! <3#Kisses and hugs ^^ /p#I'll be reposting some things maybe while im on break#Finals#thesis and exmas are done!! And clearance is almost over!! Ill be able to be more active soon!!! :D#Alibi!
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That being said as tumblr user clonerightsagenda proud creator of the longrunning #terrible space facts series and repeat invoker of the phrase "space is terrible. no one should go there" I would not be heartbroken if we spent our money and carbon emissions on something else.
#yes I blog about space exploration but it's all from a perspective of fascinated horror#ALSO before yet another person takes me uncharitably out of context#I am aware NASA's budget is infinitesimal compared to our military's#same thing for carbon emissions probably although I don't have those numbers on hand#still when it comes to scientific advancement space isn't my priority#especially with a bunch of billionaires involved just to outbuild each other's dick rockets#i don't want to tag this mooncourse
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hgs brainrot has returned due to tbosas .. speaking of hgs here’s an ask abt the hgs au: if things were totally different, and Wilbur were to be a 12 victor, what do you think a possible mentor-tribute dynamic would look like between him & Niki? I feel like it would be similar to Snow & Lucy in the way that he’s just going out of his way to cheat n help her
anon u have in fact struck jackpot because this is a concept i was spinning some thoughts abt before bee mentioned avoxes and we went OOOOH at that!!! so yes i have considered rainduo as a mentor-tribute dynamic and would love to talk about that concept too :]
so for this concept i think wilbur and niki would be close friends throughout childhood from 12, and then in their teens wilbur is reaped and, well, no one has particularly high hopes (he's a writer and a musician at heart, not a fighter) but through sheer trickery and dumb luck, he makes it to the end of the games. wilbur pulled some pretty fucked up tricks to win - when you can't use brute force, you have to use your brain - and partly due to the trauma of the games, partly due to his shame and survivor's guilt, he sinks into the capitol and relishes a new life there as a socialite. to him, the old wilbur died in the games and the new one has taken his place - to niki, and to his other friends in 12, whatever the games did to him made him into every vapid heartless capitol victor there is.
or. niki has her doubts. they all saw how horrible the games were, but surely there is some part of him left, some part that's hurting, even if it's buried deep?
anyway.
like og spin of the au, niki is reaped and this sucks - this time she does expect wilbur as her mentor on the train, and she expects some kind of warm welcome (maybe even an apology for leaving them so suddenly and silently? an explanation?) but she gets jack shit. wilbur is jaded and cruel and unrecognisable and niki entirely hates it. this is the part where i REALLY WISH we got some time of those two beefing with each other directly in canon (or at least interactions while niki was So Mad at him) but it's okay we fly blind. niki feels abandoned, lonely, thrown off of her kilter - she expected an ally in this place, but she doesn't recognise the person wilbur has become. she doesn't recognise his shallowness (...much), his ruthless advice for the arena, the way he doesn't seem to care for anything. she's scared and now she's lonely and it pisses her off - their mentorship is fraught. here are some thoughts from discord on that:
i tend to think of niki as a bit naïve before l'manberg or even doomsday - i think this is an au where this streak would come out real strong, and niki is stubborn that she can get through the games without losing herself. stubborn that she can stop things, that she can protect people. i don't think wilbur is cold enough (or, really, can bear to say aloud) to say that her odds in the arena are slim enough as it is, but he definitely tells her that she's making enemies and that her odds of survival dwindle with the more trouble she causes.
beyond that... hm. niki's trust in wilbur is almost unshakeable until nov 16, even when she outright says she doesn't recognise him anymore. i think she'd reluctantly listen re: don't burn down any buildings, but she would grow bolder each day she had to stay in the capitol. she gets more honest in front of the cameras. she makes more friends in training, and not the ones wilbur recommends. she throws barbs at him every time he makes one of those callous, cold-hearted comments about other tributes and rankings and odds. and besides, she's going in the arena this time, not him. she needs to practice her bravery.
it's like... she hasn't given up on him. she thinks the old wilbur is in there somewhere. (she is wrong. that is not how trauma works.) but she won't hold her tongue just because she
for extra angst points could definitely play up the whole 'feeling abandoned' angle between them as niki goes into the arena - probably due to how fraught their friendship gets leading up to the games. niki wants to focus on them and their friendship, wilbur has stringently cut off (almost) everything from 12 and refuses to let her in; he tells her to behave for the cameras, she tells him she never will. i think the last point in that screenshot would also make for a super tasty argument where niki feels wilbur has gone astray, that he's abandoned 12, and that he'll probably do nothing but sit on his ass and watch her die and he can't even bring himself to care about her anymore, can he? just more fodder for the arena. and honestly, i think wilbur would passively agree with most of that - he values niki's opinion, after all, even now, and if she says he's rapidly descending into a lost cause then she must be right. and it's niki, so she will be fine, and he goes to his bedroom that night and tries to pretend he is sleeping perfectly fine instead of feeling paralysed with fear.
okay now onto the games - YES HE SO WOULD. or at least i think he would go out of his way to help. as for cheating - he's a recent victor for 12 and i think he would value tommy (no doubt a link to him... i think they'd be in touch in this au also) too much to risk the punishment falling onto him as well. i get the vibes this is a games closer to 74th than 10th, so there are far fewer opportunities to cheat and the consequences of getting caught are higher. but schmoozing up sponsors? making stupid ass radio interviews or whatever to talk up niki's odds? sharing anecdotes from their childhood - some real, some entirely fabricated - across capitol airwaves to stoke their sympathy? 100%. with less to lose in this au, i think niki would be far less inclined to play nice for the cameras - i hope you starve, she spits at one of them, and wilbur appears on a talkshow two days later as she scrambles for survival in the arena to talk up how she always saved loaves from the bakery for the poorest mothers and children in 12. he borrows and begs and swindles to the point where it feels like cheating. but hey, this new wilbur is capitol-branded. he knows how to play the game.
if anything he probably sinks into the game a little too much. self-preservation is not his forte. probably wracks up a few heavy debts and favours to owe, but those are not priority until niki is out of the arena, alive. as long as she wins, and as long as the family he has isn't in danger, he will manage. wow it would suck if at some point those two goals became impossible to co-achieve. anyway
i kind of see niki's victory in the arena being similar to the one in the main au - if only because planning out an entire games is hard for meee >-< . she walks in bolder and braver for sure, and with a less strategic pick of allies, but they all get picked off and she spends a few weeks so terrified she can barely sleep and then she ruptures some fuel line and sets the arena alight with a fire that burns brighter and more ravenously than it should. but she wins, and she's airlifted out of a filthy, muddy creek she had resigned herself to die in, and wilbur barges his way through as many peacekeepers so that he can actually see her with her burnt skin and hair and unfocused eyes and trust that what was on the screens wasn't a fluke, and that they made it. and then it's just a matter of surviving the after.
i'm sure there are some other random quirks or tidbits i can think of re: this take on a c!rainduo hunger games au but these are my base thoughts!!
#can i just say whatever the hell lucy grey n snow had going on in part 1 made me so berko btw. like congrats ur my means to an end youre my#symbol youre my buddy? should we kiss? i'll get you out of here / don't make me leave these people behind#BRIDGING OFF OF THE TBOSAS DISCUSSION. i think the thing with crainduo (or at least how i like to depict them) is that they care about each#other extremely deeply and value each other... without being each others number one priority at all times.#i don't think niki plays priority with people she cares for like that; see her relationships with like wilbur and eret in lmanberg#even her friendship with and offering ponk a place to stay in her city after manberg even tho manberg hurt her#as for wilbur: his priority is tommy. like always. if it was just him on the line he'd do anything to get niki thru but it's not#asks#hunger games au#they would truly be such a nightmare in this au like. wilbur's self loathing is SO HIGH due to survivors guilt and trauma and mental illnes#he thinks that niki is So Good and Has It Together meanwhile he is So Bad#and is a mess that she cannot possibly rely on him. she can't possibly need him. she can't possibly want him around#<- and this shit is INGRAINED like. it's not even an active thought pattern anymore it is carved into his brain like a groove#and so shes like. do you even care whether i live or die??#of course he does. but this is the capitol. he cant be vulnerable in a way that matters#and that alienates niki further and this rage and heartbreak is building in her with nowhere to go. and in the arena she thinks it erupts#nah uh. i think its AFTER the area when she has to face wilbur again that she would go full screaming meltdown#ANYWAY !! i really like aus where they have this friction esp because i think like.. idk i think sometimes our views of rainduo are too ros#wilbur kind of forgets about niki sometimes because his self hatred is that bad. niki doesnt get wilburs mental illness and takes it both a#a burden/blame AND a direct rejection of her and her friendship#and they hover just outside of each others spaces anxious and angry and almost self flagellating. GOOD FOR THEM !#anyway Yes this did unlock something within me. thanks anon feel free to add on if u had more thoughts esp re: tbosas and such bc i had suc#a good time watching that movie
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