i need mlynar and tequila to get into a massive fight and then makeout while tequilas sobbing

Lana del Rey's exact wing (9w1 or 9w8) is torturing me. I see strong arguments for both. But I lean towards w1 after thinking it through properly.

Popularly everyone types her 9w8, probably because of the fallacy that 1s are all boring political types who hate art. Really 1 is the type that is MOST fixated on actualizing their ideals of beauty, so... yeah. That changes the game here completely.

I see w8 in her life choice to live Mad Max style and her constant focus on sex. Though that can all be explained away with her being an sx/sp. I see w1 in her prissiness, her extreme perfectionism towards her appearance and her highly stylized and polished music videos. Her focus on philosophy -- she got a degree in philosophy, few know this because it isn't really in her songs -- and also the tone of sarcasm as opposed to raw rage in most of her songs. She never overtly expresses her feelings of anger. But her songs are almost all sarcastically digging into the guy she is mad at by painting a pretty picture of how brutal and disrespectful of her (non-existent and invisible) boundaries he is. A w8 would be much more direct and also more minimalistic / ugly, less stylized than her. She has the 1-ish pursuit of perfect beauty

you probably already saw this in ur notifs but i have been OBSESSED with everything tot you've posted ever since my tot obsession came back. like. OH MAN I VIBE WITH YOU. YOUR IDEAS AND DISCUSSION OF CHARACTERS. CHEFS KISS. poly ot5 is my everything especially bcs it gets DEEP into every one of them :D

and i was thinking about mc's parents meeting nxx. in a scenario where maybe, they need researchers and for some reason or whatever they need someone personal, who they can fully trust including maybe some nxx stuff.

luke looks at mc. mc looks at luke.

well, if marius von hagen needed them. surely they'd be allowed to leave the program maybe temporarily.

and that's how vyn, artem, and marius have their internal parental issues brought out in full force at the sight of mc and luke with mc's parents. like they're just coddling them in the Parent way and they're both enjoying it as a Son and Daughter would. and those three are just like Oh. Wow. That Looks Nice.

artem has both parents but like based on how he's lonely as a kid i know these sorts of interactions were surely few and far between. he would Not be so emotionally repressed. marius has a loving dad but a dead mom who people blame him for and austin has said himself that he Represses. like marius. and vyn? Disastrous. yeah they would be having a Moment with that sort of scenario

and the Moments they will be having when the parenting goes to them too. because i think mc's parents are the type to parent their kid's friends too. they see these sad boys and think. Adopted.

SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG ASJJFKWKS it's just given me a lot of Thoughts.

hello hello, and HAHA YEAH i did see in my notifs a lot these past few days!! im so so glad you enjoy my tot stuff, i was particularly surprised that u even managed to get to me super early posts. it makes me rlly happy to see even those still enjoyable now ;w;

also pls this idea is lovely, has such fertile environment for BIG FEELS!!!!

i rlly wish we knew more about mc’s parents in canon. like i understand that theyve been yeeted into the void for narrative/player-insert-ambiguity purposes buT I HAVE A GREAT NEED!! TO SEE THEM COME BACK!!! ALL THE INTERACTIONS WLD BE LOVELY

and gosh yeah jkvkjHVJAHFKS 3 SAD BOIS R IN GREAT NEED FOR SOME FAMILIAL LOVE!! it makes me really emotional thinking about how artem, vyn, and marius have less than stellar parent-relationships for all the reasons u mention. it’s either absence, neglect, or something else altogether that just resulted in a childhood where their parents couldve been better. they werent the worst parents in the world, but they all couldve been better.

(sidenote: “and vyn? Disastrous” THATS SUCH A FUNNBY ONE-LINER FOR HIS PARENT SITUATION AKJFHVSOFAISLVALIUBA)

im So For mc’s parents vaguely becoming pseudo-parents to the other three. i mean, they already did that with luke, whats 3 more neurotic grown men?

(sidenote 2: i joke sometimes that luke is unintentionally very good at collecting father figures. aaron, that Bar L owner, a bunch of mentioned NSB seniors he worked under. people see luke and go “wow is anybody gonna son-ify that young man” and then they dont wait for an answer, they just go for it)

itd be sweet and also entertaining if mc’s parents invited them all to a dinner. i mean, the nxx boys are the people she hangs around The Most so it’s basically like meeting her friend group! her….really weird and varied friend group who REALLY want to make a good impression.

[outside of mc’s apartment, artem, marius, and vyn stall on ringing the door buzzer]

marius: ok so before we go in, i wanna ask…….what gifts did u get her parents?

vyn: this better not be a way for you to flaunt your gift

marius: it isnt! im genuinely curious!! and also hoping i’ll be less nervous if i know what you guys brought!!!

artem: i bought a kitchen knife set and sharpened them myself

vyn: i purchased the best bottle of wine i could

marius: …cool. cool cool cool cool those are lovely and reasonable gifts and now im realizing i should uh. tone mine down.

artem: huh?

vyn: what on earth did you get?

marius: it’s fine, dont worry about it, im getting vincent to drive it away right now

vyn: WHAT

luke, phasing into existence behind them without a sound: so are you three thinking of going inside any time this century?

artem, marius, vyn: AAHH

itll totally be a fun dinner all together HAHAHKJAVFKJHAS

Considering the SiD fandom is fucking dead. I can do whatever

So Walter x Killian hcs BITCHES. n also before anyone comes tell me that's problematic or whatever 1) i hate antis so just block me thx <3 2) Walter is literally 20-24 years in the movie, most likely 24 years old actually. Go to his wikia page n then to the comments for a pretty good theory/explanation on that. They said they'd put that age range on his profile but it just says 20 yrs old, which just seems false after all the proof from that commenter so. Yh. Fuck u <3

Now, first things first, yall know Walter upgraded the FUCK out of Killians body mods. Like he went "that looks cool! But i can make it better :) just saying :)"; now killian has better, comfier, smoother tech, like an actual robot hand instead of a claw; his eye was already pretty nice, Walter just helped make it more natural looking in case of malfunction, n avoid any pain n shit like that

Walter has Killian wrapped around his lil finger its insane. Anyone with any prior context of everything between them just doesnt know how to act. Walter wants a water? Ok but does he want it flavoured? Iced? Natural? Walter looks at Killian with those big blue eyes and suddenly he just has to touch him in any way.

Walter is definitely the chill half of this couple. Walters the anchor. And im not saying chill like in general, Walter is still is cute energetic self, what i mean is only one of them will become a flustered mess after their first kiss and think abt it forever all the time, especially at night while he watches the other sleep and pets his hair and is overwhelmed by the amount of Feelings he has for the other (killian is so emotionally repressed but then walter is the way he is n he just naturally forces killian not to be that way by just fucking breathing, n its very disorienting for Killian)

Killians not affected by sleep hours all that much, he goes to sleep whenever n then wakes up whenever n he'll be fine. Walter, however, is not a morning person. Can u imagine walter grumpy? Well, killian has now experienced it many times. Its actually how he first realized his feelings for walter. Its stupid endearing (he'd never admit this tho ofc)

Killian bites as a love language. Theyre very soft (sometimes >:)) n walter always turns beet red when he does them

Its hard for both of them to say i love u, but for different reasons. Killian, for ur regular degular emotional repression. Walter, because he never had meaningful emotional n intimate relationships to warrant saying that except for his mom, so saying it gives him anxiety like no other. So, they do that thing where u tap someone 3 times as "i love you" n then the other taps back 4 times "i love you too"

Killian never had the habit for listening to music. Walter introduced him to kpop n it all went downhill from there (his main group is dreamcatcher, because he has taste. His bias is dami)

Walter needs glasses but always forgets them. Killian is now used to carrying around two pairs of glasses: one for himself, n a duplicate of Walters glasses

I could make so many more of these bit its 4am where i am rn so i will go to sleep. If there's any mistakes yknow why that is

zuko was always my fave honestly whenever i get into atla at random intervals i always get insane over him. anyways do u have any thoughts regarding him & azula. picking ur brain a lil bit

him and azula are literally The tragic siblings everrrr I’m so normal about them (lying) they’re so emotionally repressed and don’t know how to function if they’re not constantly in attack mode because they don’t know what it’s like to just be at peace and Zuko always wanted to be loved from their dad and Azula thought their mom believed that she was a monster and they both want to find their place in the world and the way their parents treated them lead them down seperate roads and their final duel was FUUUUCCCKKKKKK they’re so

azula thinks she needs to prove herself to anything and anyone that stands in her way to prove she’s worthy of her mom’s love and she’s ALWAYS on offense mode and Zuko just wanted to be ACCEPTED they’re two sides of the same fucking coin… the prodigy and the outcast but in all reality they’re both outcasts but in two different ways. THROWS UP

hello! i have just stumbled upon your page and i have to say i love ur work! i was wondering if u are familiar with the theory of Will's romantic pursuits representing the 5 stages of grief for him? and if so would you care to share your opinion on it? :3

giggling because all i thought about was

but besides that! i have heard the theory, and i wrote my own little spin on that myself, so here you go!

so, will has had four romantically-coded relationships during the course of the show. molly, alana, margot (barely), and hannibal. the five stages of grief (because i can't remember them for the fucking life of me) are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. i absolutely believe his romantic development can be a mirror of that.

denial would be molly. will married molly after hannibal went to jail, after the famous overdramatic breakup between him and hannibal. so your mortal-enemy-slash-gay-lover-slash-psychiatrist is in jail. what do you do from here? you won't let yourself confront your emotions about him, and you sure as hell aren't going to say there was anything between you— in marrying molly, it felt like an unconscious act of denial on will's part. he's denying hannibal has changed him, he's denying that hannibal still has power over him, even locked up (which refers to me previous post about will wanting hannibal to need him and hannibal needing will to want him). in marrying molly, he's trying to prove to himself that he doesn't want hannibal anymore, that he can love and have a normal life.

anger is obviously hannibal, pre season 2b. their relationship is so convoluted with anger and dependency, of both sides trying to find themselves in the other. hannibal's ache to consume, to blur with will until they couldn't survive without each other, and will's urge to keep himself repressed and unchanged. the tension sparked a lot of deep-rooted anger in will, which hannibal enjoyed stoking all too much. in closing himself off from hannibal and condemning/sabotaging their relationship since the very beginning, establishing that anger before he finds his reckoning, he opens the entryway to hannibal seeing the perceived worst of himself before the mask comes off.

alana is bargaining. even though their relationship is in the beginning, he still carries that sort of flame for her all the way until the end of season 2— and, honestly, i don't really think it ever dies out entirely. will is trying to push off all of this new information he's being given, both about himself and the people around him, by pushing that projection of himself further. he goes after alana, a woman whom he has hardly been in a room alone with up until this point, who knows the bare minimum about him and sees him as a professional enigma, because he has gone through a very traumatic ordeal and she was one of the few people there for him (besides hannibal). what i likely believe happened was that will trauma-bonded with her and decided that she was who he should want; in any other story, doesn't the guy go for the strong girl who helps him emotionally? that's what he should be going after, right? he can't begin to broach whatever relationship he has with hannibal, whatever pseudo/psychosexual tension they've got going on, and instead opts for the option he believes he should want.

margot is depression. when will sleeps with her in s2, there's a lot of shit going down. margot is using him to get pregnant, will barely registers that she's even seducing him and is just using it as an emotional outlet, yet he still finds himself picturing alana bloom, and by extension, hannibal lecter. two people he's had romantic entanglements with thus far— alana by his projection and hannibal by what lays underneath his mask. hannibal, it seems, no longer needs him and alana doesn't want him. he's been left (in his eyes) by the two people he cares about most. i don't even think there's really an emotional connection between the two of them (there isn't, but she's still a love interest, so), which only furthers her place as his depression stage.

and, of course, hannibal "i wanted to be seen by you" lecter is acceptance. their earlier anger has simmered down but not disappeared— their romance will always be bloody and angry, feral in all aspects. will is coming to terms with that, he's making his choice in choosing hannibal. in turning him in, in telling him that the fbi knows, in pushing the two of them over the cliff. one cannot exist without the other, nor can they coexist. hannibal wants to permeate every fiber of his being with will's and will wants hannibal to see every part of him and ache for it. when will asks bedelia if hannibal loves him, this is when he starts to accept it. throughout this whole series, not one person that has loved him has been constant. but hannibal has stuck by his side through all of this mess, and still loved him, beyond what normal projection he showed. will does indeed ache for hannibal, he aches for his attention, to be wanted and needed and seen by him. he wants hannibal to need to have him, he wants to be desired and sought over. and he accepts that with hannibal in TWOTL, when he makes the choice to follow hannibal to their deaths.

@lesbian-hannibal @7x16pm @shatteredlesbian

Hi Morgan I am from Asia and I love ur blog

Can u help me understand something as I am new to this series there are some things that confuses me.

I think Will doesn't love hannibal as much as Hannibal loves Will . Yeah I understand he chose him after everything Hannibal had done but he always makes this decision at the end and after that he tries to justify his actions he is not always 100% sure with his decisions. He literally threw them off the cliff after some seconds of acceptance. Tbh I guess I fall on the minority when I say he really irritates me . I still feel hannibal's love and devotion is deeper than Will's.

Just my opinion tho

Second question was he was really jealous of Bedelia because of his underlying feelings or it was just him feeling salty that she wasn't as scared as he was .

Thank you

Ai shite iru (love u)

Hello! Thank you so much for your lovely words! <3

I have a very long post about the different ways in which Will and Hannibal express love here. I'll copy the TLDR part: Hannibal is more open about himself and his feelings, including love, hence he doesn’t have many challenges with admitting it. Will is closed off, stiff, and emotionally repressed, so he expresses his feelings in a much more subtle way.

Will has gone through a long, painful journey. He went from hiding from emotions and deflecting to not denying and carefully acknowledging them. We don’t hear words “love” or “in love” from him in relation to Hannibal because Will is not that kind of person. He doesn’t use these words freely, and for him, every small emotional step is a struggle. He tried to deceive himself and other numerous times; he tied to deny the truth and manipulate his own mind, but with each season, his feelings for Hannibal became more and more explicit. Will reaching out for physical contact, Will saying “It’s beautiful” are his way of saying, “I ached for you. I love you.”

So, I think his feelings are equally strong, he just doesn't express them in the same way. If there was S4, I'd expect Will to keep making progress and to start showing Hannibal how much he loves him more openly. Hannibal truly needs to see how adored he is, he might be emotionally starved at this point, after so many years.

About Bedelia, Will was absolutely jealous of her. Bryan on Will and Bedelia’s interactions:

And when we got to the Will and Bedelia scenes, they were just delightful. Because there were, in a sense, two spurned lovers, sniping at each other over the man that they were obsessed with.

He also said that he loves how "bitchy Will and Bedelia are to each other" and that they consider each other as "the other woman in Hannibal's life."

Hugh said a similar thing in the commentaries to the show:

Will and Bedelia are brides of Hannibal, exes of Hannibal, they consider each other the other woman in Hannibal's life, and they are very bitchy toward each other for this reason.

Just one conversation example from the show:

Will: You didn't lose yourself, Bedelia, you just crawled so far up his ass you couldn't be bothered - personal, targeted against Bedelia's attachment to Hannibal.

Will: You hitched your star to a man commonly known as a monster. You're the Bride of Frankenstein - personal attack with romantic connotation. Bedelia catches up on it and mocks him:

Bedelia: We've both been his bride. Have you been to see him?

Will: Yes.

Bedelia: Haven't learned anything, have you? Or did you just miss him that much?

Will: Have you been to see him? - jealously-personal again. Will wants to know if Bedelia is keeping contact with Hannibal. It's all about her relationship with Hannibal.

His aggression toward her and the extent of it is the reason why I think he was the initiator behind the attack on her that we see in a post-credits scene. He needed reassurance that Hannibal is capable of killing her, something he could never do to Will.

watching frozen w my little brother and like it is actually really fucked up now that im older. like imagine ur like some nine year old girl with cool ice powers that your little sister loves to see and you’re playing with her and suddenly you accidentally hurt you so then your parents take you out to a bunch of trolls that remove all your sister’s memories of you having powers or hurting her and then give you, a nine year old who’s extremely traumatized in the current moment, a prophecy about how you’ll become stronger and the world will turn against you completely if you can’t gain control . so your parents decide to completely lock you and your sister up in the castle during your formative years without any outside contact for years and you’re not only taught but encouraged to be emotionally repressed and distant so you don’t hurt anyone after what you did to your sister. and then your parents. your source of guidance and self control. fucking drown overseas, and you can’t even support your sister in her grieving because of what they taught you and she has to grieve alone because, again, she doesn’t even remember because her memories were tampered with as a child so she doesn’t even understand why you’re closed off to her or that it’s for her presumed safety. now because of the years of isolation your parents put you through she’s an emotionally socially stunted incredibly naive 18yo princess and you’re an equally emotionally stunted 23yo queen and neither of you even know what a party looks like because you both grew up in so much isolation and your sister is so resentful of you for shutting her out and you know you deserve it but it still hurts and you still can’t even tell her why so you just have to keep hurting her and hating yourself for it

I need to talk about this or I'll explode but bad habit but steve lacy is such a sanuso song. I'm going rabid rn.

I wish I knew you wanted me???

That's definitely from sanjis perspective maybe post timeskip

Here's my hc( mind u I'm in water 7 rn and have not caught up to op yet!!) Spoilers for water 7!!!!!

Okay so usopp most definitely admires sanji and his strength and how he seems very sure of himself the way he presents himself to others the way he talks the way he fights everything!! (I actually think sanji is pretty insecure but is vry good at covering it up. But usopp doesnt rlly see that and just sees him as this super cool suave dude) bro definitely has a crush on sanji for sureee

But usopp also seems very insecure and believes hed obviously never have a chance so even tho it hurts him he comes to terms with the fact that nothing is ever gonna happen there. Like when u have a crush but ur like yeah no way in hell am I ever confessing <3

Anyway sanji is most likely oblivious to all this lmao. He definitely treats usopp better compared to other male characters and I think its because deep down he likes usopp too he just doesnt know how to process those feelings cos man is repressed as hell😭. So he thinks yeah that's just normal friendship definitely doesnt mean anything that I'm always worried about him and enjoy his company more than anyone elses and make snacks specifically for him and take into consideration what stuff he likes or wants to protect him in fights or takes time to ask about his hobbies and is genuinely interested in what hes doing and believes in his abilities even when usopp doesnt believe in himself.

Also listen during water seven when usopp and luffy are fighting the fact that sanji kicks them both and looks so genuinely scared and hurt that luffy implied usopp should leave makes me so insane. And personally I never thought sanji would be the voice if reason I expected him to be like yeah usop let it go and stop trying to disobey your captains orders so It threw me for a loop cos sanji was so adamant on not letting usopp leave and was standing up for him. I am foaming at the mouth btw Anyway

The 2 yr timeskip happens and usopp gets jacked but also matures and grows and I love him so so much he realizes so much about himself and oh yeah also crush on sanji? Bros over it. Hes moved on and is okay being friends and just personally dealt with his feelings and grew in such a healthy way for himself. Like yes it hurt, change and growth are painful but inevitable and time passes. Feelings change and that's okay.

Sanji grows and matures too and comes to accept alot of things about himself and is more comfortable in his own skin and identity! And he starts to realize zamnn usopp has also grown and changed and bettered himself and has such a lively air to him and overall is more confident!?

Then maybe someone in passing (like zoro) mentions something like oof too late loverboy that ship sailed so long ago hella missed ur chance. And sanji malfunctions!!!

Hes like um what?????!?!?!

They're like um yeah it was so obvious hed always follow u around like a lost puppy and sanjis like um this is news to me bruh???? Anyway it hits him that yeah he had a chance. As in had!! Not rlly anymore and he has to come to terms with that.

AND SO I TELL UUU

'I wish I knew you wanted me' also " were you not too good for me my dear?" Like come on its writing itself tbh. I feel the song is in sanjis perspective thinking about how he never realized usopp feelings and how he genuinely cannot believe that usopp had feelings for him considering how much more insecure he was pre timeskip and how he sees usopp as such a caring and loving person and is actually a little bit jealous of how emotions seem to come so easily from usopp. So maybe if they were both mature and not so emotionally stunted/ repressed/insecure in themselves, maybe just maybe??? Something could've happened there.

This is all just my hc so take it with a grain of salt LMAOO. I actually like to imagine them happy but oof I'm a sucker for angst!!

Hi! U need to add Poland to the country list, im sorry luvie. Ur spreading like a Plague Inc. virus, im sorry hahahah also im the guy that some time ago send u an annon about GC some time ago, You have asked me some questions which im sorry for not responding to ig life got busy(i did do a mountain bike marathon tho very epic). Anyway,

1. You are not fucking anything up luv, it's not coming of fetishy or objectifingly. Ur doing allright

2. When it comes to portraying falling for someone, there is no inherent difference between falling in it as a men or a woman. But I am just a guy and never been a woman so idk. Everyone is diffrent too, and I think you write them all very emotionally charged. Full of nuance and depth qnd all those feelings that just might burst.

(I might be a few chapters behind but I really like the emotionally repressed and self destructive Remus as in it makes sense. It makes a lot of sense for a guy I think. Irl he would most probably be the typa fella that starts going to the gym or gets into 1200cc piss missile motorcycles. Maybe even drink a bit too much, but "strong" enough to get over himself and use that toxic masculinity to go back to "normal")

However, after thinking about it and like whilst keeping in mind what I said earlier - I do have a gf. Looking at me and my Sunshine, whilst strongly generalizing - I think it took me longer to fall for her. Like acually fall for her, not just like her and think she is one of the most beautiful woman on earth. But now as a guy, idk I just think about her a lot, I'm more on the logical side then her. Also way more reserved idk uhh I have some sa experience so it might be just me but after chatting a bit with some people yeah guys usually more reserved waiting for the sign or something. Idk it's ig hard to describe normality bcs it's just normal to me lol

3. When it comes to specific scenes uhhh pooki what can I tell you xD they have great chemistry, with Rem hoping back and fourth. It makes sense that a lot of them are sexually charged since they cannot connect romantically (at least as far as I've read). If you have more specific ones that would be easier to say xD

A mountain bike marathon? OMG that sounds AMAZING! You guys are all mindblowing ૮꒰ ˶• o •˶꒱ა

Thank god I'm not coming off as objectifying, I swear I was terrified, I feel like there is a very thin line, especially for BL and I wanted to portray it right and do it justice, especially since I know a lot of fanfiction can be complicated, and I have read plenty of people (specifically queer men) complaining about the way their relationships are typecasted and portrayed in said media.

I definitely focus heavily on their feelings, but that's kind of the reason I decided to write GC in the first place, I wanted to explore the complications of a throuple hehe.

It makes so much sense that guys would be more reserved I think, but I think especially in queer situations, both for men and women would be, since you might not be sure if the other person is actually queer too, idk if that makes sense?

Regarding specific scenes, I remember I was super nervous when I wrote the library scene with Sirius and Remus in Chapter 26, since it was Sirius' first time to feel something for Rem, and panic over it, I was so scared it wasn't doing it right. And also in chapter 31, when Sirius sees Minho and Tom kiss and has another gay panic revelation moment. I mean, I'm not sure when I figured I was pansexual but I think if I had seen two girls kiss in a closet and I didn't know about it, it would have definitely done something to me if that makes sense.

Sending a bunch of love all the way to Poland, thanks for answering all my questions, darling ☆૮꒰•༝ •。꒱ა

Read Gilded Constellations

i am GRABBING YOU and SHAKING YOU. did you know your mikane is the craziest. did you. did you know that. last chapter drove me so far up the wall i am still yet to calmndown...... poor mikan. imagine ur emotionally repressed gf runs away again only for two children w the exact same problem to come barging through your door.

i have so many things to ask........ but i shan't ask them all. please please tell me anything about ur ideas for mikane in general or in oppdmh bc they're the most crazy insane yuri ever. OH RIGHT YEAH AND. the actual question. obviously opddmh mikan still struggles with anxiety, but how do you think she's changed in mentality and issues after everything that came after danganronpa? any issues outgrown or gained? morphed in some way? love ur work so much every time. u made me pause my utena rewatch and that is such a big compliment u do not even know

GRABS YOU SHAKES YOUSHAKESYOU SHAKES YOU SHAKES YOU

talking about this fic, as always putting the answer under read more for people who dont wanna read lol!!!!!!!

OHHH MY GOD IM INSANE ABOUT THEMM. went into this fic knowing that i wanted mikan and akane to have their own povs because i thought theyd bring different perspectives, especially in comparison to makoto's pov. i knew what i wanted mikans story to involve and i had a vague idea about akanes (fun fact rantaro was originally gonna be kaito LOL) and then like two chapters into writing mikans point of view i was like waiiiitttt a minute. wait a minute hold on. what if they were in love. and what if they were so not normal about it

it made so much sense for the story i wanted both of them to tell that immediately i went into my notes and started pivoting a few things LMFAO. i just think that their relationship (or their pining at least lol) is able to neatly underline some of their core themes/issues in this fic, whether that be for better or for worse. through the lens of their relationship im hoping to convey mikan's sheer capacity of worry and insecurity, how she finds it difficult to move through life without another person to rely on even if she has done a bit of growing since the simulator and how that dependency affects her. and then of course akane's emotional repression is highlighted through their relationship (her forgetfulness, her inability to communicate, LEAVING all of the time), but also it's a great reminder of just how protective akane can get even if she isn't there. not to mention how worried she gets about mikan despite her absolute refusal to worry.

they care about each other to the point of unspoken codependency and while it is absolutely making both of them feel safe and happy it is still a reminder of their underlying problems. akane would do anything to avoid somebody thinking she is weak enough to be cared for. but all mikan can do is care and care and care about her. both of them are so willing to shoulder the problems of the other but neither of them want to be seen as burdens, so all they end up doing is silently dance around their issues until eventually somebody caves. INSANE YURI MOMENT

mikan still absolutely has anxiety LMFAO and dare i say..... she's...... kind of better????????????????????? or maybe not actually. going into this i had to think about how to write these characters in a way that felt true to who they are but also remembering that they have GROWN, even if danganronpa really makes them feel as if they havent lol. this is a mikan who has likely endured years of therapy, even if that therapy is SHIT at best. this is also a mikan who has been shoved into the spotlight rather forcibly and has basically been given the choice to adapt or die. so i probably shouldnt say that shes "better", it's more that shes had to modify herself to fit this new lifestyle of hers. she hasnt been given much of a choice, and i imagine shes had a few years to really fuck up and struggle before reaching this point. she is constantly in the spotlight and basically always under scrutiny, so ive sort of swayed away from her wanting attention and focused more on how she reacts to this attention-- shes grown bitter from the negative and she doesnt think she deserves most of the positive. it's this hurricane of problems with mikan and a lot of it involves her own struggle to view herself as a good person, which stems heavily from the insecurities she already had in her game and intensified by what happened outside of it. years of being seen as this iconic chapter three killer has absolutely worn her down a bit, but there is still a part of her that yearns for control over her life and the people surrounding it. she is still SO anxious, ive tried to really hammer home quite a few recurring symptoms with her like her nervous tics, sickness/lack of appetite, hair shedding, etc!! and she is extremely bitter about how shes been treated, too, which im hoping to elaborate on further on down the line. however she really, REALLY can not be passing out in front of cameras or throwing any fits about the exploitation shes endured since shes been a teen because the company she works for wont accept anything that isnt on brand. and underneath it all shes still that scared little kid that desperately wants to please

she's an older mikan but she is still very much hurting, not necessarily any less but in a way that's a bit different if that makes sense :)

you are SO FUCKING NICE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33333333333

Pre-Relationship 7, General 9, and Domestic Life 8, 10! :)))

♡ @eternally-smitten

hii omg thank u for sending an ask!!! i looooove ur ship w herbert sososo much :D what a good film. cat dead details later!!! 🐈‍⬛

What would their lives be like if they had never met?

oooh cool question!!! roman would have just followed canon trajectory i think. chewed up and spit out by the company. still as repressed as always. sippin that martini post-canon. i think shiv and roman have a decent relationship post canon but. i am unsure if ken ever forgives them for that boardroom scene. aaron...i have no clue! def worse off bc he never gets sugarbabied to hell and back. probably just perma-broke trying to pay off art school loans. also taking the time to understand roman/being w someone who understands his trauma and shit also helps him emotionally in ways he doesn't even know. so. he likely ends up continuing to have weird short and turbulent relationships.

Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear?

both of them. constantly. especially when it's SOOOO not appropriate to do so. do not sit next to these fuckers at a roy family function unless u wanna risk overhearing something that might shake ur faith.

How do they celebrate holidays?

big holidays r split between aarons fam and romans fam ! aaron muscles thru roy family holidays, while roman is bewildered and intrigued by all of aaron's friend's traditions!! aaron is a FREAK abt halloween so roman is REQUIRED to attend his house's halloween party IN COSTUME !! which he does. of course. also aaron nuclear bombs rome w valentines day propaganda which roman tooootally thinks is stupid....(he def brings the little chocolates and shit w him to work and keeps a stupid handmade valentine in his wallet....whatever)

Who’s the better cook?

aaron is a professional chef ! and roman is a billionare who i do not think could prepare a box of mac and cheese without looking around confused at least once. having a personal chef and caterers his whole life has definitely rotted his brain. aaron does the cooking For Sure

hello ben been following u for a while love the content great stuff. rewatching cql and wanted to know ur opinion on whether or not u think wwx knew he was in love with lwj b4 his death, after his resurrection, or post-canon? and talking like, IN LOVE. crush he probably knew like idk. during or after the schooling portion as teenagers ?

idk what the book says but cql specifically i think he knew pretty early on. there are a lot of fics about him JUST figuring out his feelings post-canon surprisingly so i wanted to ask u abt it lol

u've probably already said in the past but i either forgot or didnt see when uve all discussed it. thank u much love hope the hair comes out cool as shit

here's my timeline for how I think wei wuxian felt about lan wangji throughout the series/how aware and comfortable he was w those feelings:

I think that wei wuxian knew almost immediately that he was at the very least Attracted to lan wangji. he makes that stupid gay face the first time he sees him. throughout the cloud recesses arc it's pretty clear that wei wuxian has himself a little crush, and I think he definitely knows it. I've seen a lot of interpretations saying that wei wuxian had a crush but wasn't aware of his own feelings, but all of his clumsy attempts at flirting w lan wangji and trying to get his attention make it obvious to me that he knows very well how he feels and is not uncomfortable or in denial of those feelings

I don't think that wei wuxian was necessarily In Love with lan wangji by the time he's thrown into the burial mounds, but I think he's moved on from silly teenage crush to something more. the thing that makes him finally sit up and keep going in the burial mounds is him imaging lan wangji saying his name for fucks sake

during/around the sunshot campaign I think he is somewhere between Very Strong Romantic Feelings and In Love, and the fact that they spend half of that time at odds w each other only complicates his emotions and how much he is able to accept his own feelings. he obviously feels very strongly for lan wangji in a romantic way and is pushing and prodding to see if lan wangji feels the same but a lot is happening and he has just experienced intense emotional and physical trauma, Every emotion he's feeling is intense and complicated and repressed

as for post sunshot campaign pre yiling laozu era wei wuxian... I think this is where his feelings for lan wangji become more complicated. wei wuxian is pushing Everybody away post burial mounds and trying to separate himself from all of his attachments. he went through unspeakable trauma and now the war is over, he is left with a lot of time and space to fester in his trauma in a way he wasn't during the sunshot campaign. wei wuxian is conflicted about All of his relationships, including his relationship with lan wangji. I think he's struggling with being close to and vulnerable with anybody, and accepting new, intense, and, honestly, dangerous emotions for lan wangji is difficult for him. at this point he is very much shutting down emotionally and he very well may be In Love by then but I certainly don't think he's processing it fully. I think their conversation on phoenix mountain speaks to both wei wuxians uncertainty about their relationship and the intensity of his feelings for lan wangji

now. by the time "at least I could be killed by you, that would be worth it" happens, I Do think that wei wuxian is in love if only because that's the most batshit insane romantic thing I've ever heard in my life no other evidence needed. I think by then he's started to process his emotions more but also there's like. a lot going on right now. I don't think it's high on his list of priorities

By The Burial Mounds Arc, I 100% believe that wei wuxian not only knows that he is in love with lan wangji, but is fully aware of the fact that lan wangji is in love with him. for me, part of their tragedy is that by the end they both Knew, but they had simply run out of time. what is the point of saying it now, at the end? what good is that? maybe if they do not say it outloud the fact that they cannot act on their feelings for each other will hurt less

but part of the joy of their relationship post res Is the tragedy that came before it. they thought they had run out of time but they didn't! wei wuxian gets a second chance! they have been given more time!!

sorry to keep piling on you for all this ronance/nancy related stuff but i actl am v interested on why she reads as straight to you. as a lesbian i honestly can only see the love triangle going into s5 as the absolute worst case of comphet ever that just adds onto her whole compartmentalisation and queen of repression deal. this is really just me though i really want to hear ur opinion on this!! like lesbian to lesbian or smth to that effect

ty for being so polite ab asking!! honestly this is a personal thing but she just reminds me So much of the straight girls who bullied me and treated me like i was diseased and creepy growing up like. she just has that exact vibe of like condescension and that need to let everyone know how smart she is and acting overly sweet sometimes and being extremely cruel and callous others. like i can See nancy wheeler saying it's tooootally okay that i'm a lesbian as long as i know that she isn't into me and she's not like that. i can see nancy wheeler making a big deal about changing around me in the locker room. etc etc. but that isn't an objective thing yknow that's just me!!

separately from that i absolutely understand why so many people read her feelings for steve/jonathan as comphet but personally i don't see that. i think that nancy is just very emotionally inept and she has a hard time being vulnerable and connecting with others and because of that she just kinda throws herself at the nearest person so that she has somebody to lean on and focus her attention on so that she doesn't have to think too hard about herself and her feelings. like i think she's terrified of being alone and That is motivating her moreso than a desire for a romantic relationship or a desire to feel normal.

also nancy seems pretty unambiguously horny for steve and jonathan both at separate points fkvjfjcnf like she seems to genuinely want them in a sexual way that i wouldn't expect from someone struggling with comphet but ofc everyone's experience is different!

😤😮‍💨

I am once again venting below the cut, please enjoy this Jacqueline in the meantime:

GOOD LORD!! CIRCULAR CONVERSATIONS ARE GENUINELY SOOO FRUSTRATING. I've had my new car for a WEEK and for a WEEK it's been the SAME SHIT between the hubbers and the MIL:

He mentions the car bc he's excited about it

She goes on an emotionally charged RANT about how concerned she is that we went and bought this car and how she's worried about all the debt we have and that we won't be able to "just vibe"

He assures her we went over everything (which we did) and that it's affordable for us (it being the bi-weekly payment)

It stops there. He laments to me. I reassure. I boost him the FUCK UP LIKE HE DESERVES TO BE! 😤

He brings up the car again with her in the hopes she'll be like I'm also excited about this for you!!

She instead once more lectures us on debt

He once again reassures her

He comes to me lamenting once more

I am stuck watching this circle and smacking my head against the wall

I love this man so much, and he does NOT deserve the shit his mother is giving him and I VERY MUCH DISLIKE that he is STILL SEEKING HER APPROVAL. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE WE DIDN'T BUY THE CAR FOR HIM!! WE BOUGHT IT FOR M E AND HE CO-SIGNED BC THE PAYMENT IS CHEAPER AND HE IS VERY EXCITED THAT WE HAVE A NEW, RELIABLE VEHICLE THAT IS SAFE FOR ME! HE'S HAPPY I'M SAFE!

And he's NOT explaining this bit to his Mom, and keeps being like w/e her opinion doesn't matter

BUT THEN THEY HAVE THIS CONVERSATION AGAIN

AHHHHHH

I hate circular arguments y'all. They make me want to explodE. My entire morning/afternoon has been reassuring the hubbers and trying to point out how the convo is circular bc he's looking for her approval and excitement but she is looking for Something Else BC she's worried about our finances. Guys, imma be real with you. This is an affordable payment for us. It's literally only coming out of MY PAYCHECK since it's MY CAR and they BOTH seem to be forgetting that and it's causing this stupid discussion that won't end until either:

He tells her he's heard her concerns and asks her what she's looking for (since despite his reassurances and walking her thru the process we went thru last weekend and showing her the numbers and how it all works out fine she STILL keeps voicing her concerns, to the point where I haven't even talked with her about it but am dying to yell WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE US TO DO MARGE, GET RID OF THE CAR??? Because really, what WOULD you like us to do and it's presumptuous of you to assume we can't handle it and will need your help)

He tells her he's heard her concerns and asks her to just listen to his and please show some excitement because he's excited about it, so why can't you be

They let it die and never talk about it again the end OR

He understands that this is another one of those Margie being Margie scenarios and he's not gonna get her approval or excitement, and accepts that all he needs in this scenario is his OWN acceptance and excitement, and find a way to be OKAY with that

And I don't know how LIKELY any of these are going to be in the near future (and dw, I texted him that blurb already so hopefully it's on his mind and he makes good choices, good choices being either 1 or 4 bc this isn't gonna get resolved any time soon with my MIL's old fashioned REPRESS UR EMOTIONS ass 😤) so I am instead FUMING about situations OUTSIDE OF MY CONTROL bc as an outsider Incan see how it's going and after 4 years of therapy I can see what needs to be done bc I'VE BEEN THERE TOO

This situation has me so down it's making me wanna call and vent to my Mommy and that's how you KNOW it's yucky tbh

🏳️‍🌈+ any of the gaang you haven’t done yet plus mai and ty lee. just love hearing your thoughts lol

ok short answers bc thats a lot of ppl. im sure u can find more thots of mine on my atla blog & i can go find posts to link if you want.

katara: cishet. and to be clear i do not mean this as an insult in the slightest she simply is a cishet girl. in fact i find it more insulting to her to claim she's not cishet—both bc it often carries the implication that you don't appreciate her character beyond (baseless lol) lgbt headcanons, and because. she is so true to herself and has so much agency and by saying shes gay ur possibly implying that she's closeted and/or repressed (and that's why she doesn't show her sexuality) which! she isn't! it's an important part of her character to be very emotionally open and assertive!

sokka: bi + nonbinary. i tend to use he/they for sokka. oh boy do they have some complexes about their gender

zuko: gay kinsey 6 etc. also cis. fnjsksdjdjjd i understand that ppl who say he's trans are mostly just trans ppl projecting but come on it does not make sense logically or thematically. (for him to be transmasc that is. he could hypothetically be transfem &/or nonbinary theoretically imo but i still don't believe in that...). anyway ive written essays on his gender and sexuality.

toph: i don't have a strong opinion honestly? definitely queer in some way and i tend to think of them as nonbinary in some way. butch lesbian is what i tend to see them as also. but bi and aro/ace are also #valid

mai: lesbian. and kinda ambivalent abt gender eventually imo.

ty lee: also a lesbian. in fact i think ty lee appeared on screen during my first watch and i immediately thought that. idk why but i was definitely right. to be clear for those who are unfamiliar w my atla opinions though: she does not have feelings for azula. she does for mai though