#and then it’s cleaning the new house and actually moving in.
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Building Each Other Up - Epilogue
Read Pt. 1 here, Pt. 2 here, Pt. 3 here, and Pt. 4 here.
Mark's (now Ali's) POV:
It's been five months since the competition, and since then, Shane agreed to move in with me. It's been great actually dating instead of just hooking up, and I couldn’t be happier.
Initially, I thought that him fucking me in that body would be a one-off thing, and we’d switch back, but we fell kinda naturally into our new roles. He fucks me so hard every night and, while he has let me top a couple of times, he’s still always definitely the dom. That’s carried over into our daily lives too. He takes care of every little thing, treating me to romantic dinners. cleaning up around the house, and spending all his money on me. Its fantastic.
But I think most of all, I am enjoying being in out and in an age-appropriate relationship with a young guy. When we walk down the street together, all anyone sees is two incredibly hot boyfriends – which is exactly what we are.
---
It was all going great until one day out of nowhere, we ran into Mark at a gay bar of all places. He was flirting with a younger guy before he caught a glimpse of me out of the corner of his eye. I guess he liked the taste of himself when he had accidentally possessed Ali a few months ago, who would’ve thought.
I started to back away, but he caught up to me and cornered me.
"Hey, you’re that kid Ali, where the fuck is Shane … I mean Mark," he yelled at me.
I kind of timidly backed into the corner by the bathrooms, feeling a knot of anxiety tightening in my stomach.
Shane, my savior, immediately noticed my distress and left the bar to come to my rescue.
"Babe, is there a problem here?" he said, his voice calm but firm.
Mark turned around and saw Shane standing menacingly behind him, his arms crossed over his chest and a steely glint in his eyes.
"Fuck, I knew I’d find you eventually," said Mark, his voice dripping with anger.
Without hesitation, he whipped out a small vial from his pocket and downed it immediately before quickly latching onto Shane's back.
"Give me back my body!" he yelled, his voice desperate and frantic.
A look of shock crossed Mark’s face as he realized that he wasn't sinking into Shane's body as he had expected.
"What the fuck, dude?" Shane exclaimed, throwing him off. "You gotta get a grip."
Mark stumbled backward, his expression a mix of confusion and frustration. "What did you do?" he asks, his confusion evident in his voice.
Shane smirks, his gaze unwavering as he meets Mark's eyes. "Ohhh, you must be Mark," he says. "Ali said you'd show up sooner or later. Too bad your potions won’t work."
---
You see, a few weeks after we swapped, I asked Ali if he wanted to swap back. I explained that my "former trainer Mark" was crazy and had managed to convince himself that my body was actually his and would not stop reaching out to me, trying to take it back. I was managing it, but if he was in "my" body instead, it would be even more difficult to manage.
In no uncertain terms, he told me no to swapping back. I understood. That body and the power it had was intoxicating. And honestly, I didn’t mind being his super perfect boyfriend—I mean look how cute I am.
"Okay," I said, accepting his decision, "then we need to seal ourselves in."
I had done a fair amount of research on a new potion that would make us impervious to the effects of the original. I handed him a vial and said, "If you're sure this is what you want."
He downed it without hesitation, and I downed mine as well. He pulled me in for a passionate kiss and said, "I love you, Ali."
"I love you too, Shane," I replied, feeling a sense of relief wash over me.
----
"Dude, I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but this is my body. You need to get lost," said Shane, his voice firm and commanding.
In that moment, Mark shot me a knowing look. If his body didn’t know who he was, then I must be the one he was really looking for. He quickly ran and attempted jump into me instead, which only threw me back against the wall. The force of the impact knocked the breath out of me, and I struggled to regain my bearings.
That was enough to grab the attention of the bouncers. Shane quickly restrained Mark until they grabbed him and were able to lead him out of the club.
Shane rushed back over to me, concern etched on his face. "Babe, are you okay?" he asked, his eyes searching mine for any signs of injury.
"Yeah, I'm alright," I reassured him, forcing a smile despite the lingering soreness. "I'm just gonna use the restroom real quick."
He nodded, his expression still tinged with worry. "Okay, I'll be waiting out here for you."
As I collected myself inside the restroom, I quickly dropped the worried look and smirked to myself. My sealing potion had worked for both of us. Mark wouldn’t be causing us any problems, and I was free to enjoy the hunky boyfriend I had built for myself carefree.
I raised my phone up to take a quick selfie, capturing the moment as a reminder of my victory. Fuck, the best is only yet to come.
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I always imagine Vlad moving to the Fenton residence when him, Jack and Maddie officially become a throuple, even if it would make more sense on a technical level for the Fentons to move into Vlad's mansion. The mansion has more space, it would be easier for three adults and two teens to live there, and the trio could have room for a bigger lab...
It's just that, even if the mansion has sooo much more space, it's not really a home?
Vlad may have his Packers collection displayed around the place, but that's the only thing making it look like someone actually lives there, and it's not just a cold haunted mansion (which it kind of is lol). It's full of empty rooms, it may look clean and organized, but that's only because no one is around to make a mess of it. The carpets in the hallways are fluffy and pristine, seemingly new and untouched, except for a little worn path leading to a single bedroom. It's a status symbol more than anything. It's big, luxurious, clean, it looks great on pictures, but that's about it.
Meanwhile, the Fenton's house is messy, it smells weird, the kitchen cabinet doors don't close all the way anymore, the walls have splotchy mismatched paint- where crayon doodles were hastily painted over, the carpets are all bunched up with dirt that will never come off, and the guest bedroom is full of things that have no room for them anymore. It's home. It's where Jack and Maddie watched their babies take their first steps. Even if Vlad offered them a bigger, better, lab in his mansion, Jack and Maddie would never be able to leave their home.
And I don't think Vlad would want to leave their home either, not when he's become a part of it.
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Kook girlfriend
Some JJ Maybank x kook!reader headcannons!!
Warnings:
-
-the first time you met it was when your parents ordered groceries the first time you moved to the island and JJ showed up at the door, you immediately flashed him a bright smile and welcomed him in, only earning a grunt back (his hatred for kooks not faltering no matter how you welcomed him) but he warmed up after you helped him unpack the groceries and even made him a sandwich after you heard him stomach grumble.
-sometimes you ordered just a single ice cream pot just to see JJ again.
-you then began to hang out with the other Pogues more and more. You had already known Kiara and Sarah from the kook academy as they were the only Kooks that were actually bearable.
-then you and JJ began having sleepovers at your house every night, both very thankful that your parents ended up warming up to him and always welcomed him with loving arms into your large home.
-you two would cuddle up in your king sized bed as you flicked through Netflix and watched tv shows after tv shows. (JJ getting fake mad at you if you watched an episode without him)
-after JJ slept at yours for three days straight after a run in with his dad and being to afraid to even go home, you decided to take a shopping trip with your weekly allowance and buy you both matching clean white robes.
-the day you showed him the robes, he was so grateful that he finally obliged with doing a self care night with you.
-this included, face masks, pore strips and even watching your favourite vogue beauty secrets.
-yet it wasn’t until you were into the last step of your self care night and you began to pluck JJ’s messy eyebrows that you had managed to get your self situated on his lap as his thumbs caressed your thighs as your tongue stuck out the corner of your mouth while you worked your magic.
-“all done!”your words caused his eyes to flutter open, half asleep his eyes searched your face as you smiled down at him, your hands resting on his chest, running your fingers along the soft fabric of your matching white robes.
-your breathe was immediately sucked from your lungs as JJ hand snuck onto your cheek and pulled you in to place a firm kiss onto your lips.
-within the first week of dating, you had brought you’re new boyfriend three gifts. He refused them every time but couldn’t resist as you sent him a pouty lip and puppy dog eyes.
-
Hope you enjoy!!
Love ivy🎀
#jj maybank#obx netflix#jj maybank fic#jj maybank fluff#obx fanfiction#outer banks#jj x reader#rafe obx#kiara obx#obx x reader#obx rp#obx imagine#obx cast#obx fic#obx#obx roleplay#jj mayback x reader#jj mayback imagine
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Si x Friend headcannons mayhaps🥺👉👈
......ANON I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
God it's been a minute and Si's lore got lumped in with me first trying to make an oc for the game before switching into self insert-
Friend 100% was Si's first crush even if he pushed Si away at first and while keeping in mind that neither of them knew what a crush was at that point.
Even before Friend's family dies, Si's family would hold up appearances and let him hide out at their house occasionally. Si's house was nowhere as clean as Friends no matter how much clutter and other junk were cleaned up, but to both of them, because it was happier together than alone, it was home. After the accident, Si was allowed more in Friend's household and Friend was allowed to travel more frequently between his and SI's place to get what little comfort and sense of normality he could hold onto.
Keagan caused a REALLY big rift in Si and Friend throughout high school until the two of them had their initial falling out. A lot of it was Keagan super hitting on Si, and one of Keagan's friends (blanking on his name atm) not only putting down Si, but putting down Friend at the same time. It was stupid and chalked up to peer pressure and SI not actually having a good support system that he distanced himself from Friend, when in reality they were each other's biggest rocks and something Si regrets betraying before the events of the demo.
The day Si calls Friend to pick him up after breaking up with Keagan and not wanting to ride in a car with a drunk driver was one of the hardest days in Si's life. He finally allowed himself to be vulnerable and rely on the one person he knew he could count on....and oh god was he glad it was still true.
During the events of the demo- I see Si being on the side of still harboring old feelings for Friend, but not wanting to mess up the second chance they have. He assumes Friend is being his usual flirty self since Si had heard about him being more of a playboy, and you expect your friends to change over the years, so he mostly pushes his feelings down and feels like he's the only one stuck in the past.
^ This also causes him to be a little too nice and friendly with people since he's used to his best friend "casually flirting" with him and doesn't think too much of the more subtle approach most people take....like Carter for example.
I don't see Si getting kidnapped to the basement in the way that most do in that sort of route. I see Friend playing on Si's paranoia and convincing him that he can't trust anyone in the way he trusts Friend, and that it would be just like Keagan all over again. Why start all over with someone new when you can be with someone you've known....trusted....loved....your whole life? I see maybe one friend that Si makes outside of Friend possibly dying if they pry too much into Si's disappearance, but I would also like to think that if Si went willingly, Friend would try his best to scare them off instead of risking Si being upset with him more than he already is with the confusion of being gaslit and essentially talked into living in a fancy cell.
Alternatively....we can have two dorks who have been love with each other since there were kids where one person knew all along and the other took longer to realize it until their sense of love and comfort suddenly wasn't there anymore. Si and Friend are both on the demi spectrum iirc, but it takes longer for Friend to realize it and they fall victim to stupid high school bs in between everything. In this case, I see the cat cafe date being canon, with SI wearing a cute outfit just to TRY and shoot his shot again hopefully picking up on Friend's signals in the right way this time. Of course, this still means that Friend is weary of every move Si makes, but it opens up for more measures of security on Si's end. Si'll never know who killed the man who touched his arm or the woman who got to close to him while he was walking, and slowly Friend has more of a grasp on Si's day to day life to make sure he NEVER leaves Friend in the same way his sisters did. To Friend....he has nothing left to hope or LIVE for if he doesn't have Si, and he's not giving an inch of an opening for it to happen again....if he can manage it.
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NEW MUSIC NEW MUSIC NEW MUSIC GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR MOVE I HOPE THE MUSIC IS GOOD PACKING MUSIC
Hi anon!
Only a few hours to go!!!
#tae solo#packing is basically done#i’ll be getting the key soon!#and then it’s cleaning the new house and actually moving in.
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it's my first day in my new apartment and here is a list of things i'm unreasonably excited about having:
a kitchen!! i can cook with an oven! i can have multiple things cooking on the stove at the same time! i can wash the dishes standing up at a sink instead of kneeling on the floor! (i used to cook my food with a single hot plate (is that the word?? anyway) and wash dishes in two big plastic tubs on the bathroom floor)
a tiny little balcony!! (a french balcony in finnish, one that's basically just a door you can open and railing right outside to keep you from falling down) i don't even have any special reason for why this one is good, it's just somehow really nice! but i can open the door and get some of the wonderful spring air in! and the glass door lets in so much light!!
a second floor apartment!! people can't see in! i can people-watch without it being super obvious! no one can let their dog piss right outside my window! it'll be warmer in winter because there's some insulation between me and the earth!
#the floor is currently filled with stuff so there isn't space yet#but it feels so spacious!#and it feels like a full home because it has a kitchen and like. a cupboard in the bathroom#this feels like a place where i could invite someone over#partially because when coming to help me move my dad also brought me the following items:#two chairs from my parents' house#my parents' newish vacuum cleaner (mum prefers the older one)#a mattress (and a new pillow and duvet from ikea)#so if i invite someone over the place will be actually clean#and they will have a place to sit that isn't my bed or the single chair i used to own#and i can have a friend crash on my floor if needed
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just got myself animal crossing new horizons here's a toast to my first copy of an animal crossing game that I can't lose
#can't lose it bc I bought it digital#but anyway I've been through THREE. (3) ENTIRE FUCKING COPIES OF NEW LEAF FOR MY 3DS#and I've lost every single one of them. ac new leaf I miss youuu#and it's insane actually bc we have lots of ds games and that's the only one I had a consistent problem with losing#I literally still have my fucking ds winx club game but animal crossing? probably still back in texas#we literally moved. as in cleaned out our entire house. and I didn't find my last animal crossing copy
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i’m soooo talented i can cry about a fake birthday’s party almost a month after my birthday
#personal#my dad was having a delusion about my birthday and i was home alone tee hee#no so get off early from work bc i have to go in tomorrow but hey that’s some overtime#anyway so i get home and watch dad so my mom and the lady living with us can go grab dinner plus relax#but like 3 hours in and my dads having a delusional about my birthday#so i call my mom bc i can’t tell like hey surprise brithday dinner or and she’s IMMEDIATELY like i’m on my way#like okay. not what i asked. and then i asked and she’s like no he’s just crazy#come back and my dads pushed his chair out and is just walking and i’m like oh fuck not again#so anyway think she’s on her way home from a twenty minutes location#30 minutes pass and she’s still not here and dads getting worse#he’s demanding to go into my room to get my gifts m#btw my room is a mess bc i haven’t had time to clean since getting a new job actually :) and also moving out and back in#so i’m like worried one he’s gonna break soemthing of mine or hurt himself and he won’t fucking listen that he can’t go in#we compromise it works out#then he’s demeanding to go outside to get in and im like dad we’re inside the house already#and he’s insisting about the catering company and how i always have to plan my own stuff and never have fun and he wants this perfect#for me which like. great sentiment. i’m crying and arguing bc you’re not helping me#aka sitting down and he’s getting upset with me and it’s like i cannot give you the impossible#mom comes home and i chew her out in front of the lady living with us so classy on my part#but i go back and im like im not trying to be mean to you. but you need to help me if you want my help#don’t say ur on ur way unless ur own ur way. and she’s like well you know the place and im like then say ur in line. well i had to get a#tip. then say ur getting a tip. don’t say ur own ur way unless you are#and i thought she was sad so i’m like i love you but i just need this behavior to stop#and she’s starts laughing bc i’m treating her like she’s my kid and i’m forgetting myself#and i’m telling her well you’re forcing me to#and im like i can move out again ( she doesn’t know that i probably cannot emotionally)#and that if she expects adult help she cannot treat me like a child#and i’m not saying i have free reign in the house but i am saying you can’t have it both ways. just communicate with me#and also asked if she could see how this was mean or rude to me and she was like yeah but reluctantly and all but rolling her eyes#i’m not saying she can’t have fun just talk to me. told her i’m not playing these games during my vacation
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too much to do not enough brain capacity to do any of it
#the list is#i have to contact potential housemates and organise housemate interviews/house inspections#i have to clean out the bathroom and the fridge and the laundry and the bungalow of all the old housemate shit#i have to sweep and mop one of the empty rooms so it's ready#i have to move all of my shit from my old room to my new room and organise everything in there#i have to clean my old room so its ready for housemates#i have to write my intended research statement for my honours application#I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT EXACTLY MY INTENDED RESEARCH WILL BE FOR MY HOURS#*honours#i have to finish getting christmas presents#i have to finish making christmas presents#i have to wrap christmas presents#i have to do grocery shopping maybe this week or maybe i can get away with waiting until after christmas and living off of leftovers or smt#i have to organise a second date with a boy#i have to be social for christmas#i WANT to be social with friends and loved ones#i need to call water provider to change ownership of account from dead housemate which i swear i did but i dont think it happened#i need to set up a new spiltwise account i think#and like make an actual list of bills#I NEED TO PAY THE WILDLY EXPENSIVE WATER BILL FUCK#um i think thats it#i know im most likely missing something lol#oh im pet-sitting for the week after christmas#god kill me now#god i need to get a copy of the lease and condition report from ex-housemate i feel like i need that#and eventually get a death certificate to take dead housemate off lease#and get a skip to chuck a bunch of housemate shit out#god#im so sorry if anyone read all of this because you shouldnt have but here you are?
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i'm getting anxious asldkjfa
#okay so idk if i've talked about my current situation much#lived in one place for seven years; despised it but didn't have the funds to move#my living situation went to shit and i saw no feasible way out aside from taking my aunt up on her offer of moving in#with her and my grandma indefinitely (aka until i could find a new job and afford to move out again)#did this so i could focus on finishing my school work and also move to this side of the state because fuck eastern WA tbh#but....now that i'm here......#like it's nice living rent free atm especially considering there is no cashflow#however.............................#they're both extremely conservative; which is a choice but okay; religious; and homophobic (and frequently make homophobic comments)#also they have three chihuahuas of varying levels of derangement so i'm just having the time of my life here#first of all they all poop and pee in the house at wild abandon. the number of times i've stepped in it at this point is...too many#rat dog number 1: has the most annoying bark/whine combo i've ever heard and she starts the other rats on a chain reaction#rat dog number 2: actively eats the other dog's shit and like they do occasionally clean up after their dogs but???#they also just leave paper towels covering the mess until they want to take the time to actually clean it up#rat dog number 3: is a special case. i feel sorta bad bitching about him because he was abused and raised in a meth home so like...#he's special needs but that doesn't mean he can't also be annoying#he makes a lot of the messes and also he will run around in tight circles barking for up to 15 minutes at a time#also all three of them have fleas AND GAVE THEM TO MY DOG but they won't do much of anything about it so anything i try to do for Frodo#is basically pointless#and this isn't even getting into the cooking...my aunt has like idk 40+ ingredients she's allergic to and my grandma#can't eat a lot of foods and they expect me to cook for them because i went to culinary school once upon a time#i'm tired#on top of all this; they live out in the boonies; which wouldn't be that bad of a thing because i like being up in the mountains/forest#however#I don't want to be trapped here during the winter with them because i think i would lose my grip on the fraying threads of my sanity#so i was looking for a job in town#applied to a bunch of places; got one in Portland; which is a little over an hour drive away from me atm#now; i've always wanted to live in OR; so i'm jumping on this opportunity to move#but since it's a new job; i don't have the pay stubs to apply for an apartment#and rent is so fucking high right now
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tomorrow we will pack up my campus office, sell the last few Facebook marketplace items (god willing), finish deep cleaning the apartment, and load up my car for the trip home. then on monday I’ll get up super early so I can shower, pack up my bedding, and hit the road by 8 while my parents oversee the movers loading up the pods. then I will drive 11.5 hours home 🫠 I want to spend that car ride canceling my current electricity and wifi, then setting up the electricity at my new place. oh my goddd I’m so fucking tired and also 100% of my brain space is currently being taken up by moving logistics so I feel like a stranger to myself lol. I am really really glad I did so much intensive packing & purging work over the last week and a half because it’s made this weekend so much less stressful but also please let me sleep for one million years aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I just wanna be settled so bad
#moving sucks!!!!!#it’s so much work!!!!!!#i really wanted to get to seattle faster but I think it’ll actually be good to have the week at my parents’ to just#crash and sleep and focus on new job#then I’ll have a full week in seattle before my pod arrives#to deep clean the apartment and paint in the evenings probably#but we’ll see about the painting it’ll depend on how exhausted I am#might save that for when my parents are there#literally all I want to do right now is sleep#and yet here I am on tumblr#ok BYE goodNIGHT#the dogs and I did a long solo walk on our usual neighborhood route#probably for the last time since I think tomorrow might be hectic#and we said goodbye to each house#and ruthie demanded to be carried halfway through#because she is Very Small and pip and I both walk too fast
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I'm starting to see ppl talk abt updating their artfight pages and at first I was like what why it's still months away and then it hit me that by months it was two months and now I'm just silently sweating as my anual side project to remake the eternal gales refs and give them all icons comes back to haunt me
#rat rambles#oc posting#well I mean the good news is that all the staliens are already done and Ive already started on the human kids#the bad news is that theres still 5 more refs for me to remake and 9 icons if I decide to commit to that#the only one Ill probably force myself to do is sprinkles since shes the only stalien that doesnt have one and I dont want to leave her out#the human kids might just not get them tho especially since theres other characters Id like to make refs and icons for too#not as many newbies to the field this year which is a good thing since I do not have a lot of space left for new characters lol#Im probably going to take it easy this year in terms of my goals for artfight since last year I crashed and burned Hard#hopefully Ill have the time and motivation to draw a decent amount but if I dont Ill try not to be too broken up about it#especially since Ill probably burn myself out a bit doing the last minute ref rush lol#its not necessary especially since all the guys who needed the new refs most got theirs but Id like for them to be on the same page#I also went ahead and cleaned up my page a lil bit to make my life easier in the future#I should probably update bios and stuff but I dont feel like it Im too tired#tomorrow Im definitely going to need to clean some more as I have been for nearly every day#I mean guess thats why Im here in part#last week of pet sitting tho so soon Ill be back home again#Im not sure if Im excited or dreading it cause while I miss my family I also have been rly enjoying a house to myself#like its not necessary easy to do all the chores and stuff but it's a lot easier to do said chores when Im alone#and Ive actually been waking up at reasonable times too like not having my mom floating around is doing wonders#its almost making me rethink my insistence that I couldnt live alone but I definitely think itd get to me in the long term I need people#I just wish there was a better middleground since having people constantly in the house stresses me out so bad#it leads to me hiding out all day in my room and that's just not good for me#but its not like I could live by myself even if I wanted to#at this rate I dont think Ill ever move out but lets not think abt how much worse that could be for me thats future me's problem
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aldkjfalsd
paying more than mortgage costs for an airbnb house that
was not even remotely cleaned upon arrival (MULTIPLE sticky handprints on every surface in the kitchen, dirt IN THE REFRIGERATOR, muddy footprints, carpets & rugs so filthy that we HAVE to wear our slippers & give up on mopping the floors because they get dirty IMMEDIATELY, hair [human and pet, head and pube] on all the sheets and in every corner that has never seen a broom or vacuum, unidentifiable liquids and stains on every door [bedroom and bathroom] and the sheets & comforters)
was clearly not built to code bc it's worse than a 40s house but was built in the 70s (the stairs are definitely not to code and walking through the house quickly is like walking on the deck of a boat out at sea)
was advertised w central air but that was a lie and it only has tiny wall heaters in most rooms and 1 space air conditioner in 1 room
has a window that is so poorly fitted that the worlds largest creatures can come through it and give me a panic attack and nightmares for a week or more, and we had to physically tape it up ourselves
has a fridge that needs a water filter
has multiple smoke & CO alarms that are malfunctioning and/or need batteries
advertised lots of closet space but upon hanging 7 shirts on the ramshackle, not to code, pathetically cobbled together "hanger" in the only closet that won't leave the clothes dragging on the floor, collapsed completely and was unusable (unsurprisingly given the WOOD ITSELF WAS WARPED FROM THE WEIGHT OF *PILLOWS*)
has an UNBEARABLE mold and mildew stench IN THE MAIN BEDROOM ON THE FIRST FLOOR and what looks like a MOLD STAIN ON THE CEILING which is BENEATH THE UPSTAIRS SHOWER
has no batteries, lightbulbs, screwdrivers, garbage bags, or anything else remotely useful in the house for us to use (the vacuum is old as fuck, dusty, busted, and has hair EVERYWHERE, and the broom is literally duct taped together)
the upstairs bathroom toilet is like an escape room or physical/gymnastics challenge to get in and out of
one of the single-room wall heaters is literally BROKEN--turning it all the way down means it cranks and stays on forever, turning it all the way up temporarily turns it off, and it only stays off consistently if set at some middle temperature, but even then it'll still turn on unbidden--and there is no on/off switch
the furniture is nigh unsittable bc it is so cobbled together and uncomfortable
the chairs are basically unusable from how small and uncomfortable they are
the mattress are MISERABLE bc they have the world's FIRMEST MEMORY FOAM on ALL of them
THERE ARE NO CURTAINS ON ANY OF THE FUCKING WINDOWS AND ONLY THREE OF THE WINDOWS HAVE BLINDS. ONLY THREE!!!! THERE ARE ELEVEN OTHER WINDOWS IN THE HOUSE!!!!!!
everything outside is overgrown and in need of maintenance and care and is therefore unusable (there are just random dogtoys in places--inside AND outside)
there's just a used candle. sitting behind the tv.
the tv is TRASH and the volume is the WORST i've ever heard. we've trying fixing it REPEATEDLY. it ALSO is impossible to consistently get HDMI to connect to it/my laptop. i have to unplug and replug it multiple times.
the laundry room REEKS OF MOLD/MILDEW. it's also more of a closet. we have to have the fan on 24/7.
you cannot open the blinds on the 3 windows that have them. they removed the pulleys that allowed you to do that because "it was a pain/difficult to lower them back down" so they just REMOVED THAT OPTION.
the "guide book" for the home is CLEARLY outdated because it HAS THE WRONG INFORMATION FOR HOW TO GET IN THE HOUSE AND UNLOCK/LOCK THE FUCKING DOOR.
and we've only been here since last weds.
i'm wearing an n95 mask sitting in this bedroom because with my HEPA filter going, the room's wall heater turned off (bc that shit looks rank), and febreze odor eliminator sprayed REPEATEDLY in here after dousing the room in lysol upon arrival, the smell of mold is hurting my fucking lungs.
i literally want to strangle the ppl who think this home is in ANY WAY remotely fucking livable--and also, REMOTELY WORTH THE HELLISH AMOUNT OF MONEY WE HAD TO SPEND ON IT.
#and before ANYONE gets on my ass for this shit--WE HAVE NOWHERE TO LIVE#WE SOLD OUR HOUSE & CAN'T MOVE INTO OUR NEW ONE FOR 2 MONTHS#WE ARE NOT GOING TO LIVE IN A FUCKING HOTEL THAT LONG#we had to do that for 2 weeks last summer and that hotel was WORSE than this house that we have to ourselves#literally just i'm so fucking tired of EVERY HOTEL & AIRBNB being horrible#literally there is nothing clean or as-advertised anymore and i'm fucking sick of it#it sounds like such a bougie whiny complaint BUT IT'S NOT!#I REMEMBER A TIME IN MY OWN FUCKING SHORTASS LIFETIME WHEN HOTELS WERE CLEAN!!!!#INCLUDING SHITTY CHEAP ONES AND MOTELS! we just knew to not touch the duvet or the carpet! it was otherwise CLEAN!#and i don't mean Fuck The Housekeepers i mean FUCK THE CEOS FOR SHORTING THE HOUSEKEEPERS' SALARIES#FIRING SO MANY OF THEM AND RUNNING ON A SKELETON CREW#AND THEN DOCKING THEIR PAY IF THEY ACTUALLY USE *CLEAN MOP WATER* AND *CLEAN RAGS*#AND TAKE ~TOO LONG~ TO CLEAN A ROOM#and FUCK ppl who have an airbnb and don't actually do ANY upkeep of the fucking place#you're disgusting and horrendous and i hope you never know a day of fucking peace#for charging through the nose for what you KNOW is subpar GARBAGE#that goes for landlords ESPECIALLY
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oh my god for the past like two months i literally just Have Not Been Able To Rest like i've been just Doing Stuff all of january and this month like I've been going to the store a ton and cleaning a ton and just Not Resting like I know I've needed rest days but even when i Try to rest i just can't i Have to be doing stuff and like. finally getting this computer and a few more things for my room like. i've run out of Stuff To Do. I spent this entire month stressing that all this stuff was piling up too fast for me to take care of and. i think i've got it all for now. and i have nothing to do today. i think i can rest finally
#like i just. yesterday i had a Mostly Do Nothing day and it Really Confused me 😭#bc like i've just been Working for as long as my current functional memory goes back#cannot comprehend just sitting around and being ok with that anymore#but yesterday i did that and was pretty ok with it#i mean i still have mild cleaning to do but that's the part of my room that decided to kin Sisyphus's rock so#other than that though my room no longer looks like a hoarder house#it was so fucking bad like i just. my mom Will Not buy furniture???? she's just so against getting Any new furniture????#so i had to like Beg for some fucking shelves that don't shatter under the weight of Three Books#(bc thats how my walmart bookcase broke!!!!! it can't actually hold books!!!! it just snapped from a half full shelf)#but now i have some actual storage instead of fucking cardboard boxes#literally all of my stuff was still in the boxes from moving we moved here four years ago#genuinely sick of the sight of cardboard boxes in my home now#now i have some actual places to put things instead of cardboard that's duct taped together to make a shitty shelf#like i just do not like cardboard and duct tape anymore i dont want to See It
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For any followers of mine still living with parents, guardians, family, or even just with roommates and who've never lived alone and/or fully on your own terms (whether ye be 16 or 60), I have TWO pieces of wisdom for you for when you eventually do:
You WILL discover that you were wrong about some shit you felt pretty strongly about before. Maybe you never realized how often your mom ACTUALLY cleans the bathroom and it turns out she asked for help really rarely. Maybe, much as it grates to admit, putting $50 into a different savings account every paycheck really IS the ONLY way to save any fucking money. Maybe that big rolling trashcan you resented your roommate putting in the kitchen, and got in that big fight about, really WAS super convenient and now you have to buy one for yourself after they move out and take it with them. Maybe blanching vegetables so they retain their color when cooked actually DOES enhance a meal, pretty food slaps actually, and the reason you didn't think it was worth the effort is because you were depressed.
You WILL also discover new shit that works SO much better for you than everything you'd been taught. Maybe you'll discover that dropping trash off at a recycling center at your convenience works way better for your brain than getting it picked up on a set day. Maybe you'll realize you don't actually hate tofu, you just hate how your family cooks tofu. Maybe you'll love being able to walk around the house naked whenever you want. Maybe you'll find you thrive in a space with giant framed nude photography, or taxidermy animals, or fandom themed Everything. Maybe you'll realize that keeping the thermostat set like 5 degrees colder (or hotter) than is typical makes you sleep better than you ever have before in your whole life.
The point of this wisdom is: Stay humble, but also, stay excited. There's no point pretending you weren't wrong about shit you were wrong about, just eat the crow and move on. But also, there's so much to look forward to about your own space-- even more than you could ever imagine when you don't have it yet.
#my posts#my thoughts#idk what to tag this#adulting#i guess#hope#?#most of these aren't me specific but the recycling center and blanching food definitely are
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i've been in a state of "if one more minor thing happens i'm going to fucking snap" for about five to six months now and i just haven't been able to. like logistically i should be burnt out, transmogrified into a beast, and/or dead, but none of that is an option for me. you know?
#personal#vent#i thought shit with my stepmom was actually getting better bc i'll finally be gone soon but nope#she's still either scrutinizing my every move and decision#or telling me what to do with my health and my body and telling me to go to a doctor when she never talks to me#and she ignores my suffering and scrutinizes me for the symptoms of illness she's telling me to seek help for#when doctors have done absolutely nothing to help me up until this point#but most of her time is spent questioning my every move#how many hours i work. why i dont work more hours and make more money and why i stopped working two jobs#why did i purchase new bedding for my place? why did i purchase pots for my place? why aren't i moved into my new place yet?#i didn't clean my french press the way she wanted me to. i set my drink on the counter for ten minutes and to her the world is on fire#because im ruining her vision of a perfect and tidy household when OUR FUCKING COUNTERS ARENT ATTACHED#AND OUR WALLS ARENT PAINTED#AND OUR FLOORBOARDS ARE COMING UP#AND I HAVE NO FIRE ALARM AND NO VENT AND NO CLOSET DOOR AND NO OUTLET COVERS IN MY ROOM#BECAUSE OF THE CHOICES YOU HAVE MADE THAT HAVE RUINED ALL OF OUR LIVES ESPECIALLY MY DADS#WHO BY THE WAY YOU ARE INCREDIBLY CRUEL TO FOR THE MAN YOU HAVE BEEN ENGAGED TO FOR OVER A DECADE#she only wants to spend time with her fucking girlfriend which is fine. whatever. but my dad isn't your fucking indentured servant#who is supposed to construct everything in the house and clean everything and do your bidding all the fucking time#why are you so fucking mean to us#i know you hate me but if you hate him why are you still here#the only reason im not at the bottle of the sibling food chain is because my brother managed to be slightly more of a disappointment#but im still pretty fucking low on the list of how much my family cares about me#im done im so fuvcking done im literally out of here in like two days but it wont be over#because ill still be coming over for dinner and i have no idea if she's going to treat my dad any better once im gone#and the past year has been fucking killing him and im being made to feel that that is my fault#jesus christ.#and i cannot express any rage or frustration to them because nothing fucking works they DONT FUCKING UNDERSTAND OR CARE ABOUT ANYTHING#because i didnt graduate early and i didnt move out at 18#im going to have a fucking aneurysm i cant do this
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