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#and then a brief montage of all the women walking out showing only their faces before they cut back for the reveal

shirtlesssammy · 3 years

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4x10: Heaven and Hell

Then:

TFW needed a little work before they got it right

Now:

We start off right where we left off in the last episode. The angels are here for Anna. She has to die.

Uriel attacks Ruby and Dean tries to stop it. Cas starts walking towards Sam, and despite Sam’s pleas, he boops him into unconsciousness. Suddenly there’s lights and Uriel and Cas are zapped to places unknown. (Cas’s wings in the flash...emotion hearts). They find Anna with a ridiculously severe wrist wound and a mysterious sigil on the mirror written in her blood. She sent them away.

They hide Anna away at Bobby’s. Dean and Ruby bond over hex bags. It’s almost cute.

Um, Bobby’s not home because he’s in the Dominican (and I just Googled “Hedonism and Dominican” ... probably shouldn’t have). Anyway, Sam’s got exposition on Anna. This bought of psychosis isn’t her first. When she was a toddler, she was convinced her real father was “very mad -- like wanted-to-kill-her mad.” Anna interrupts their little chat.

Sam asks her why the angels want her. She has no clue. She’s upset that her parents are dead and her life has been turned upside-down. They need to find out what her deal is.

Enter PAM!

(I know I’m technically not supposed to like that bit of sexual harassment but her exchange with Sam is SO funny and cute. He’s so earnest and they play the victim card with her, but she ain’t having it and she’s going to have some fun at Sam’s expense. And Dean’s smile at the end, JOY.)

Pam introduces herself to Anna and sets to hypnotizing her. She asks about Anna’s father and Anna freaks out. Dean tries intervening and gets knocked out. Pam wakes her and Anna remembers who she is. “I’m an angel.”

Pam and Ruby are side-eyeing this “friendly” angel. Turns out Anna was Cas and Uriel’s boss in angel-land. She disobeyed, which is the worst thing an angel can do (WEEPS for future Cas.) She ripped out her grace and fell to Earth. Now Heaven and Hell want her. She’s determined to get her grace back.

“So you’e just going to take some devine bong hit, and shazam, you’re Roma Downey?” Ah, Dean, you do have a way with words (Also, dude loves pop culture SO much that Touched By an Angel is on his radar. BLESS THIS BOY.)

Sam remembers reading about a meteor about 9 months before Anna was born and Ruby responds, “You’re pretty buff for a nerd.” Get a room, you two.)

For Real Life Jesus They’re Cute Science:

Ruby apologizes for getting Sam involved with this war. She’s afraid of Alistair too. He’s no joke in Hell. She tells Sam he should send Alistair back to Hell, but he’s got to practice to do it. Sam refuses.

Anna’s star gazing when Dean returns from taking Pamela home. Dean asks Anna why the angels saved him. Dean then asks why she would want to be human. He lists all the bad things about the human condition, and she lists all the good.

Ultimately, it’s the emotions of being human that matter so much to her. Obedience and emotionless faith is overrated. Only 4 angels have ever laid eyes on God (Well...five now!) Anna complains about watching over Earth, waiting for order from a father who might never return, and Dean laughs and laughs. I really love how Anna’s story shifted to Cas. Dean and Anna give each other looks, but Sam, in all his glory, interrupts. He’s found something!

They head off for a tree in Kentucky that is probably the place where Anna’s grace fell.

They get to the tree and Anna can sense that it’s not there anymore. Someone took it.

Later, Anna’s listening to Angel Radio and hears the angels say that if the Winchesters don’t turn over Anna, they’ll throw Dean back in Hell. Dean is speechless, but Sam wants to know what kind of weapon works on an angel. Dean’s in freak out mode --they need to find an answer.

Later, Dean’s reading a book by flashlight and Anna approaches him to thank him for all that they’ve done. He brushes her sentiment aside. She ponders the thought that she doesn’t deserve to be saved (AND I need to stop and talk about how this parallels Cas in Purgatory...he thanks Dean for everything, he believed he didn’t deserve to be saved. BLAF. And Dean and Anna are more canon than Dean and Cas? I think not.)

Dean lets slip that there’s something he deeply regrets as well, and Anna takes the opportunity to reveal that she knows what he did last summer - er, in Hell. He crumbles when she tells him to forgive himself. (Narrator voice: and then he spent ten more years failing to do exactly that.)

“You are not alone,” she tells him and I remember why I like her (before a later plot twist scrubs her away). Anna MAKES A MOVE and kisses him. It IS their last night on Earth, after all. (I quietly eat the script pages for “Free to be you and me” while simultaneously high-fiving Anna for her excellent taste.)

Cut to a montage of Impala sex which cuts out all the bits of sex in a car where you’re crammed in a corner awkwardly trying to get off your clothes without kicking the other person. Anna touches Castiel’s handprint, laying her own over the lines of his fingerprints. And I know that it was likely just a way to set up the Dean-is-connected-to-Heaven parallels in this brief shining moment when both boys actually had non-dead love interests at the same time. But MAN it sure cuts me open now.

Ruby watches Sam sleep, then heads out to a crossroads. She burns her protective hex bag and Alistair appears.

Ruby offers to give up Anna in return for her and the Winchesters’ safety. Alistair has another proposal…

Uriel greets Dean back in the barn. Dean looks confused for a moment before he realizes that Uriel has invaded his dream so they can have a little chat. Commander Cas isn’t around - “You see, he has this weakness. He likes you.” Uriel reveals that he has Anna’s grace. But nya nya nya he won’t give it back.

We cut to Ruby, naked and strapped down as this show is wont to do with its demon women. Alistair tortures her with the demon knife. She refuses to tell him where Anna is...but she will show him.

Back in the barn during waking hours, Dean drinks his feelings until the doors burst open and Uriel and Castiel arrive.

Sam demands to know how the angels found them, and Castiel glances meaningfully at Dean.

Anna realizes the deal that must have been brokered: herself in exchange for Sam’s safety. We experience many sad close-ups of Dean’s self-hatred and it HURTSSSS. Anna kisses Dean and assures him that he’s forgiven.

Anna’s ready to face the angels at last. Cas apologizes, but she brushes it aside. “You don’t know the feeling.” First of all, Anna, rude.

For This Town Ain’t Big Enough for the Both of Us Science:

Alistair shows up in the barn with his demon goons. The Winchesters, Anna, and Ruby skedaddle to the fringes of the barn, leaving the angels and demons to posture toxically at each other.

Fisticuffs ensue! Alistair pins Cas, growling Latin at him until Dean whacks him in the head. Anna takes advantage of the fight to have her Ariel moment.

She orders everyone to close their eyes as her own fire consumes her. It blasts Alistair away, and Castiel gently pulls Uriel away as well. Everyone congratulates themselves for their excellent plan to pit the demons and angels against each other.

Later, Sam and Dean recap their feelings at the Impala.

For Rural Roads Science:

Dean brings up something Alistair said during the fight - that he “had promise.” I finally remember during this rewatch that Dean’s been denying what happened in Hell all along. Dean starts to talk. “It wasn’t four months,” he begins. “It was more like forty years. They sliced and carved and tore at me in ways that you-- Until there was nothing left. And then suddenly I would be whole again. Like magic. Alistair at the end of every day - every one - he would come over . He would make me an offer to take me off the rack if I put souls on. If I started to torture. And every day I told him to stick it where the sun shines. For thirty years, I told him. But then I couldn’t do it anymore, Sammy.”

“I got off that rack - god help me I got right off it - and I started ripping ‘em apart.” The weight of the torture he inflicted presses down on him. Sam tries to reassure him, but Dean continues to rip out our hearts and leave them cold and gathering refuse in the gutter. “How I feel? This inside me. I wish I couldn’t feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn’t feel a damn thing.”

Dean Quotechester Deserved Better:

Any chance I can dick over an angel, I'm taking it

What do they want me for? Why did they save me?

Feelings are overrated, if you ask me

When you got Godzilla and Mothra on your ass, best to get out of their way and let them fight

I wish I couldn't feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!

#spn recap #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #cas #anna milton #uriel #ruby #spn 4x10 #heaven and hell #supernatural season 4

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inessencedevided · 3 years

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Ah, but what scenes in particular did you enjoy? The wangxian ones in general? Or were there any particular ones that stuck with you?

-the axe cultivator

Oh, ac, I missed some of your question last time didn't I? So sorry. My head is kinda in the clouds these days

There are so many scenes that stuck with me, so I'll make a bullet list and probably still miss some ^^

It's such a small thing but in ep 1 the transition from the tale of how wei wuxian was killed transitions to the tea house via a shit from within sizhui's trea cup as he's pouring tea "onto the camera". It's nothing special but remember loving that shot so much the first time I watched that it was one of the things that kept me watching

Wangxian-wise in the first two episodes, I'd be remiss not to mention that handgrip when wei wuxian plays wangxian to calm wen ning down. Because it goes on ... and on ... and on. When I watched it for the first time I was like "ooohhhh so it's gonna be this kind of gay". You know the endless-longing-stares kind. And now when I rewatch it's just devastating. The last time they saw each other before this scene, they also held onto each others wrists but wei wuxian let go and fell to his death. And here lan zhan is, holding on for minutes and only let's go once jiang cheng threatens wei wuxian. Just ... 💔

i started shipping xiyao from their very furst sxebe together. Those two actors (i try to remeber their names but i always forget them again. My memory is shit when it comes to names :/) really just did want some of that sweet sweet homoerotic tension. Also, their first interaction stand out to me as the moment i really started to like lan xichen. In a setting that was shown early on to be highly hierarchical, he exhibited in the very forst scenes that he is willing to disregard someone's standing and look at their character and abilities instead. I just really love xichen ❤

Okay, i can't name one scene per episode, so let’s sum them up a little

I adore this progression during the cloud recesses and the yin iron arc from a flirtratious rivalry to genuine deep freindship and love. There are so many little moments that stand out because of the subtle acting joices made my wang yibo and xiao zhan, as well as the script, The lantern scene, when Wei Wuxian doesn’t betray the yin iron secret to huaisang and lan wangji goes “hu, so your bullshitting has reasons”, when they are in the market and lan zhan actually communicates that he doesn’t like crowds and wei wuxian pulls him closer but not into the crowd and so many others. When you watch closely, you see them realising little details about each other and I’m honestly so impressed with how amazingly the process of their falling in love was portrayed

fast forward a bit: obviously, the freaking montage quasi-fan vid in the middle of the cave scene set to their freaking love song. I remeber when I first watched this scene I actually, literally screamed. I could not believe it because their was no fucking way that this could be read as anything but romantic and I was not used to that much blatant queer romance!

A little less happy (okay a lot). The entire destruction of the jiang clan with a special mention to the scene when Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian just saw the bodies and run into fields where they fight and Jiang Cheng chokes Wei Wuxian and then they just fall back in exhaustion and sleep right there under the open sky. Everything about that scene was brilliantly done and also soul-crushing. The loss of innosence in that moment devastated me. It was so obvious that in the moment of deepest despair, all of these children’s traumas and deep-seated fears reared their ugly heads. So Jiang Cheng directs all his grief at the easiest target for his anger and Wei Wuxian just takes it because that is what he thinks is his job. And the real tragedy? This dynamic will not be broken until Wei Wuxian’s literal death. These children need therapy so goddamn badly and all they get is more trauma on top of their excisting trauma.

“The single log bridge” scene. I. Am. A. Sucker for the found family trope, especially for characters who cronically think they have to do everything on their own. So there Wei Wuxian is saying he will walk his dark path alone, but instead he finds lit lanterns and a humble feast prepared for him by people who love him. That juxtaposition kils. me. every. time. YOU ARE LOVED WEI WUXIAN! FOR YOURSELF!

(Shout out to the second time his word are refuted, this time by lan wangji and *gasp* verbally. Because there is NO better love declaration than that scene in front of basically every leader of cultivation world who politely wait for their turn to attack them)

Luo Qingyang removing herself from the narrative. I literally cry every time.

Talking about women: jiang yanli defending wei wuxian and calling him her brother. That moment is the "three things all wise men fear" quite incarnat, only it's the anger of a gentle woman

“Let me go” So ... I have SUCH a thing for couple who grapple with questions of when it is time to let go and when it is time to hold on. So Wangxian hits all my buttons. I will go further into this in my last bullet point (about the very last scene)

Oh god, this list is gonna get so long and i’m still going to forget things

In the present timeline:

Again, to sum it up, all the gentle wangxian moment where they look at each other and their entire face grows soft. Every almost-smile lan wangji sends wei wuxian, every "oh. He really loves me huh?"-look from wei wuxian. Especially in the Jingshi just after lan Xichen's loredrop. These two intensly guarded people (yes, wei wuxian is guarded,he just hides behind smiles) are so open with each other. I only have to see a guf of lan wangji with his heir down and I go feral!

Talking about that episode, the lan family backstory as a scene does things to me. And I remember watching that the first time and so much of lan wangji's behaviour suddenly making sense. Especially little lan zhan kneeling in front of his mother’s house and that being how he showed his grief really drove home just how this man exhibits emotion. I'm pretty sure that that was the moment he really became my favourite character.

Same episode and a start juxtaposition to the domestic scene between wangxian before: the talk between lan xichen and Jin Guangyao just afterwards. You could probably write an essay of meta about the parallels and differences between those two scenes and I think that's deliberate because they're back to back. The lan brother's share tea with the person closest to their hearts. One is finally able to open himself fully, the other closes up more than he ever has before with this person. The framing in that scene alone drives that message home, never mind its content. It's heart-wrenching and so well done!

Talking about xiyao: jin guangyao's death for similar reasons. Just ... arrrgh

I'm sure I've missed a ton but thus is already so long so I'll close with my favourite overall: the last scene. The parting and subsequent reunion on the mountaintop. I've stated before why this means so much to me. It is such a reassuring message to me: to have two intensely different people learn to understand and love each other exactly as they are. Being who they are, the occasionally walk different paths. But they don't limit each other. They learn to improve each other by just being there when they are and therefore know and trust that their love will return.

This was mostly cql because you asked for "scenes", but have some honorary novel mentions:

Lan Wangji: "The face says nothing. Listen to the heart-beat." 😭😭😭

The moment when wei wuxian collapses after the second siege and lan sizhui expresses surprise over this, lan wangji says something like "We are all human." I love that moment for many reasons. 1) it's one of the rare direct insights into lan wangji's thoughts. No matter how brief he is here, you don't say something like that just because. 2) and it's significant that he is the one saying it because he, too, is placed on a pedestal. In fact, I think a lot about mdzs boils down to the conflict between the inner self and outer perception and how that dichotomy can be both a deliberate shield (lan zhan being the perfect example) and a curse

I hope you and your axe are having a wonderful day 🥰

#mdzsnetcc #ask #ask game #the untamed #cql #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian #lan xichen #jin guangyao #wangxian #xiyao

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adrenaline-roulette · 4 years

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Four Eighths

airing: Four x Eight (Reader) Word count: 4.5K + Warnings: Coarse Language, slight angst, character building (Four), he’s kinda redeemed for being such an ass in the last chapter! If this were a movie, there would be a shopping montage (Preferably with La Roux Bulletproof playing), also very reckless driving (Eight is a god damned bad ass!)

*Disclaimer, as promised this is a more lighthearted chapter, still with a slight bit of angst, but I feel like that’s just a given when it comes to 6 Underground fics!

Missed Chapters ONE, TWO and THREE.... Maybe read those first? Might help you understand what’s going on here!

Chapter Four: I'm having fun, don't put me down

The trailer door slammed shut behind you, as you stalked towards Five’s trailer, your wet hair being blown in all directions by the sudden gale which had picked up at base. You were mad, you were beyond mad, you were at the point of furious! “Who the fuck does Four think he is? He doesn’t have a fucking clue what I can do!” You snarl under your breath, not that it made any difference. You could’ve screamed the words from the top of your lungs, and you doubted anyone would hear you over the wind. As you rounded a corner, Five’s trailer came into view, her and Two sat on the steps leading inside, both looking up at you when your shadow cast across them. Your eyes were hidden behind a pair of heart shaped sunglasses, the cheerful eyewear masking the look of rage piercing your eyes. Plastering on a smile, you leant against the side of Five’s trailer, resting your clasped hands behind your back. “Sorry I took so long, sleep kinda happened.” You smirk.

Five waves you off, smiling softly. “No stress, if I were still a medical practitioner, I’d be yelling at you right now to go back to bed, and finish healing.”

“You do that anyway. Medical licence or no…” Two grins, earning a shove in the shoulder from Five.

“That’s beside the point! None of you actually have to listen to me when I tell you do something! When I wore a name badge and stethoscope, people would do exactly as I said!”

“Thanks Five, but really, I’m alright. I don’t need any more sleep. I feel fine.” You grin, feeling your anger slowly ebb away. Five eyes you from head to toe, as if she were expecting a mortal wound to appear somewhere on your person. “Seriously Five, it’s okay. I’m no more injured than I usually am after attacking the punching bag!”

At this, Five cracks a grin, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. “Two, you’ve turned her into you! Next thing we know, Eight’ll be running around with a gunshot wound in her back, telling us all that she’s fine!”

“How is that possibly a bad thing?” Two gasps, looking between Five and you, a tiny smirk working its way onto her lips. “We need more people like me in the world, and I’m honoured that Eight is just that!”

“Besides, eight is divisible by two! So of course we’re going to end up like each other!” You laugh, kicking one foot up behind you, planting it firmly on the side of the trailer.

“By that logic then, eight is also divisible by four, would that make you and Four similar too?” Five grins. Your breath hitches in your throat, the last thing you want it to think about that arrogant Brit. No, you were nothing alike. You would never question someone’s place on a team before they’d had the opportunity to prove themselves.

“Definitely not. He and I are two very different people.” You answer almost too quickly, both Five and Two noticing your sudden shift in posture. Your back had gone pin straight, and your hands had moved to rest in front of you, fingers locking then unlocking over and over.

Two stands up, stepping over Five who was on the step below her. “Well, I don’t know about you, Eight. But I know that after a good fight, I always like to get a big meal. There’s a diner in town that serves pretty decent food. Ready to head on in?”

Pushing away from the trailer, you nod twice, smiling gently at Two. “That’s sounds great.”

“I’ll get the keys from One, I’ll meet you both at the car.” Five offers, closing her trailer door, and heading towards a shipping container. You were still learning where everything at base was, but if you remembered correctly, the one Five entered was the communal rec room. It was often where One and Seven could be found, battling it out in a game of pool.

*****

The silver McLaren 570S sped down the highway, going well over the speed limit, though considering that you had only passed three other cars the whole time, it didn’t much matter how fast you went. Two had offered to drive, as she claimed to know a short cut to the small town you were visiting, and as it was your first time leaving the base in weeks, Five had offered you sit in the passenger seat to take in the scenery, which you would’ve done had it not been blurring past you at a rate of knots. Eventually, the car slowed down as you entered a small populated town, driving through the quiet street at an acceptable speed. “Where are we stopping first? Shopping or lunch?” Two asks, turning to face Five in the backseat.

Five gazes out the window for a moment, contemplating her answer. “Lunch makes the most sense, it’s the right time for it…”

“I was thinking shopping first. If we eat later in the day, then we’ll have an actual excuse to not have to eat whatever Three makes for dinner tonight.” You offer, tilting your head to the side as you wait for a response.

Two chuckles, nodding her head. “I may like Three, but his cooking is atrocious.”

“Shops first, it is then!” Five grins, as Two drives further down the street, until she pulls into a parking space. The three of you climbing out, before instantly being hit with a sticky, humid breeze, making you all wish you had remained in the air-conditioned car.

The two women lead you down the street, as you look at each of the shops you pass. A few small clothing stores, a grocer, chemist, realtor, arcade, cinema, three diners, one Italian restaurant, and finally you come to a home décor store. “They don’t have much, but it’s enough to make things a little more comfortable.” Five offers with a smile as she pushes the door open for you all.

Inside, the store was set up in multiple different sections. One for bathroom, another for children’s rooms, kitchens, lounge rooms, and of course master bedrooms. Moving further into the store, you leave Two and Five to look through the lounge section, as you make a beeline for the bedroom portion of the store. The store offered just about everything you could possibly need for a bedroom, though as you weren’t in the market for a new bed, or furniture at all for that matter, you were left with only a small portion of the display area to look through. There was a tall floor lamb which you select, along with a matching smaller lamp that you intended to use by your bed. Next came bed sheets, the ones you had been using since you arrived were clearly hand me downs, not that there was an issue with that, but you did want to new ones. Finding a few sets that you liked, and also hoped would fit your mattress, you move on to the more decorative side of things. A string of twinkling fairy lights was added to your basket, along with a cream coloured rectangular rug. As you looked further around, you came across decorative throw cushions, which you quickly snatched up five of, all in different colours and patterns, only to then find a throw blanket which matched one of the five, which you found yourself needing!

Making your way back to the front of the store, you found your travel companions causing a ruckus in the kids room section, where they were attempting to build a fort with the few items available to do so. The store clerk looked as if he was having an aneurism, though he was unable to say anything that would make the women stop. “If only One could see you both now.” You giggle, heading over with your arms and basket full of décor.

Two pokes her head up from behind their fort, smirking at you. “Why do you say that?”

“When he was telling me about all of you after we first met, he told me I had to behave well around you two, because you were the adults of the team.”

Five bursts into laughter, as Two joins in with her own giggles. “Fuck One, he sees what he wants to see when it comes to us! He wouldn’t notice if we walked around with fake moustaches drawn on!” Five gasps, shaking her head fondly.

“One time, during a briefing, Seven didn’t show up, but instead stuffed a jacket with paper, and blew up a balloon and put it under the jackets hood. He set it up perfectly, it actually looked like someone was asleep on the table! Unless you got too close, then it was obvious what was going on. One got through the whole meeting, and only when everyone stood to leave, and the fake Seven didn’t, did he notice something was wrong!” Two has a fond look in her eyes as she tells you her story. “If he thinks we’re the adults, then that’s fine, but we know the truth!”

A part of you longs to stay with the women, and help them build their fort, but the other part of you feels the urge to rescue the poor store clerk. Turning to face him, you smile kindly. “Hi there, could I grab these all please?”

The young boy blinks in shock, tearing his gaze away from the two grown women destroying the store. “Uh- sure! Just follow me.”

You do as he says and follow him to the register, he looks no older that fifteen or sixteen perhaps, and clearly has had no experience with dealing with a situation like this. As the youth reads out your total, you smile and pull out the credit card from your purse. Two had handed it to you before you left, saying that is was One’s card, and was only to be used for the essentials. When you had asked if shopping for your tailer counted as an essential, she had looked directly in your eyes and said, that home decorating was the only essential. “Can you add an extra 70 bucks to the total please?”

The boy blinks at you in surprise, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. “Why’d you wanna do that?”

You shrug lightly, twirling the card between your fingers. “Because I feel bad for the mess my friends have made. Figure this might make up for it a bit.”

He doesn’t question you again and does as told, presenting you with your new total, to which you happily pay. By the time the small items had been bagged up, you were left with two lamps in large boxes, and a rolled-up rug to try and figure out how to carry out to the car. “Oi ladies! Leave the poor shop alone and come gimme a hand here!” You yell across the store, hearing the giggling from the two women cease.

*****

Loading your purchases into the car had been one hell of a hassle, while the McLaren was built for speed, it was certainly not built with the intention of ever using the trunk! After much swearing, and the threat of returning the rug, the three of you had managed to get everything safely inside, slamming the trunk closed, with the vow to not open it again until you were back at base. Next, came a very late lunch. It was well after three when you entered the diner, only a handful of other patrons there at the odd time of your arrival. A middle aged woman with flaming red hair directed the three of you to a booth at the back of the diner, handing out plastic menu’s. You all placed your orders, heeding Five’s warning and staying well away from the nachos. “Four had them once, I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so unwell…” She had advised, to which although the thought of Four being sick did spark joy in you, you would rather not find out if it was a one-off thing or not.

Once your meals were handed out, conversation flowed freely between the three of you, no question was off limits now that you were away from the base and One’s prying eyes. “Alright Eight, I’ve been trying to figure it out all afternoon, but I just can’t. So you’re going have to answer it for me. What’s the go with Four? When we mentioned him back at base, I genuinely thought you were about to cry, or scream. Maybe even both…” Five begins, dabbing the corner of mouth with a napkin.

You pray that the ground will open up and swallow you whole, at least then you’d have an excuse for not answering. Of course, they had noticed your reaction earlier, you’d never been good at hiding your emotions, your dad used to warn you to never play poker! Both as an anti-gambling campaign, but also because he knew that if you did, everyone would know straight away if you were bluffing or not. You look across at Two, who although has her mouthful, looks just as curios as Five does. Sighing deeply, you rest your elbows on the table, hissing quietly as you press against a bruise you didn’t know you had. “I’m just tired of the way he’s been treating me is all.”

“Wow, that was so informative. I feel so enlightened! Thank you so much for sharing such a heart wrenching story with us, I know that must’ve been hard for you.” Two grumbles, glaring at you over her meal. You had hoped that maybe they would accept such a basic offer, but apparently that wasn’t the case.

“It’s just that he’s been ignoring me since I arrived! Every time I try to talk to him, he just pretends he can’t hear me, and then there’s the times when I’m talking to someone else! He walks right up to us, and just starts talking over the top of me, no apology or anything!”

Five clears her throat, looking at you softly. “I don’t think he means anything by it Eight. He was like that with all of us when we first met him, he just seems to take a while to warm up to new people is all.”

At that, you can’t help but laugh, causing the two women to look at you in surprise. Out of all the reactions you could’ve had to Five’s comment that was not one they had expected. “Is there more that you’re not telling us?” Two presses on, placing her fork down and giving you her full attention now.

Your fingers comb through your hair, pushing the sweaty strands away from your scalp. “I uh- overheard him talking, or rather shouting with One today.”

“Bloody hell, those two fight like cats and dogs sometimes, you’ll get used to it eventually.” Two shrugs, leaning back to press herself against the booth’s chair more comfortably

You shake your head, breathing out deeply. “No, it’s not that. Christ I couldn’t give a flying fuck whether they scream at each other all the time or not, what I do care about though, is the way he talks about me when I’m not around.” You take a sip of your ice water, the cool glass rather soothing against your palm. “He was questioning One as to why I’m here. He thinks that what I do is pointless, and that I shouldn’t be a part of the team. Apparently, you don’t need a hacker, and that having me around is a liability. Then he accused the fight today of being a fluke, basically saying the Three was an easy take down for me! Oh, and then there was this whole thing about you needing a driver instead of me, and when One said that the team would continue taking it in turns of being the getaway driver, he basically said that I wouldn’t be able to drive a getaway vehicle even if I wanted to!” By the time you finish you feel fresh tears clawing at the backs of your eyes. You squeeze your lids shut, until you feel the need to sob subside.

With your eyes shut, you don’t see the looks exchanged between Two and Five, who were conducting a silent conversation, with you none the wiser. “Eight, I’m not trying to excuse Four’s behaviour, or his comments. But there’s something you should know.” Five sighs, resting a comforting hand over your shoulder, smiling gently when you look at her beside you. “Four, well he’s been part of the team for a while, he joined well before I did, so he’s come to know a fair few people in his time with the Ghosts. By now, you’ve probably realised that there’s a number missing in our team, Six. He was with us for our first mission in Florence, but things didn’t end well, and he didn’t make it. Four and Six, they were practically joined at the hip, despite what One always told us, warning us to never get too close to each other, they did anyways. They were best friends! Six was our driver, and when he was with us, you could always find the two of them dicking around, going for joy rides, just being overall stupid young boys, but at least they were having fun. When Six died, it hit Four like a ton of bricks, for weeks he kept to himself, he disappeared for nearly two weeks, none of us had any idea where he went, we still don’t. But then, he suddenly returned, and begun acting as if nothing had changed. Even though, in his world, everything had.”

A crease forms between your brows as you watch Five, tears are brimming in her eyes, but just like you, she’s too stubborn to let them fall. “Since then, Four’s been, different. He puts on a brave face, but we all know that there’s something eating him from the inside out. But he refuses to talk about it, and we can’t force him to. One uses it to his advantage, reminding us that this is why we don’t form attachments, but we don’t listen to him. Forming attachments keeps us human, even if it hurts sometimes.”

You blink slowly, taking in Five’s words, a deep pang of sympathy pounding in your chest. All of what you had just been told, it made sense to why Four was so quick to defend Six when he was arguing with One earlier. “I get that he’s been hurt, and that maybe he doesn’t know how to deal with the loss of Six. But why is he taking it out on me?”

This time, it’s Two who answers you, drumming her long fingers on the table. “He’s doing exactly what One has been telling us to do for years, not making attachments. He would rather have you hate him, than to get close to you, and have something happen. He can’t do the same with the rest of us, he’s known us too long now. But you? You’re new, he doesn’t know anything about you, and if he can keep it that way, then neither of you will be hurt if another mission ends badly.”

“But that doesn’t explain why he was talking about me like that to One! If he was saying it directly to me, then sure, I’d understand because yeah, I really am close to hating him after those comments. But when he was talking to One, he didn’t know I was there!”

“You didn’t have to be there. Gossip travels quickly when there’s only seven of us around, secrets don’t stay secret for long. One way or another we all find everything out. Four knows this as well as the rest of us do. Anything that he says to One about you, will eventually get around base until it reaches you. This time, the process just skipped a step, and went straight to you, before the rest of us found out.” Two offers with a tired shrug.

You pick at the remainder of your meal, mulling over this new information, unsure of how to process all of it at once. The table grows quiet, the three of you all lost in your own thoughts. “So Four doesn’t hate me really…. And, he doesn’t think that I have no place in the team?”

“I can’t guarantee anything, but I’d bet you fifty bucks that that’s exactly right. He doesn’t know you; he can’t hate you.” Five laughs, and you feel some tension leave your shoulders, finally feeling somewhat relaxed for the first time in weeks.

Biting down on your bottom lip, you gaze across at Two, then at Five, both of whom raise their eyebrows, they could see the cogs in your mind turning, but they had no idea what plan you were formulating. “I may not be able to do much to change this situation. But the least I can do is prove him wrong.”

“What’ve you got in mind Eight?” Two smirks, sitting up straight and pushing her plate to the side of the table.

*****

If you thought the McLaren was travelling fast on your way into town, then the drive out meant you were practically flying! The leather steering wheel was soft against your hands as you swerved in between cars, paying little to no mind as to which lane of the freeway you were legally supposed to be driving on. “Jesus Christ Eight! Would you mind not killing us please?” Two gasped, as you narrowly avoided a head on collision with a semi as you overtook a Winnebago, despite her vocal protests at your erratic driving, the sparkle in her eyes proved that she was enjoying the ride just as much as you were.

Five however was not having a grand time, and looked to be on the verge of carsick. “Eight, there are breakable things in the back of this car! Please slow down! Think of the lamps!”

You look at Five through the rear-view mirror, raising your eyebrows behind you heart glasses. “Why have the speedometer go this high if you can’t drive that fast?” You challenge, pressing down on the accelerator further, the engine revving in a delicious purr.

Whereas on the way into town, even with Two speeding as she was, the trip had still taken forty-five minutes. This time around, you were easily halfway back to base, and had only been driving for fifteen minutes. “Fucking hell Eight, we’re supposed to be dead! What happens if the police pull you over? How do you explain that three dead women are currently driving at a highly illegal speed down a freeway?” Five tries again, though it only causes you to laugh, even Two was finding the whole ordeal rather humorous.

Watching Five in the mirror, you see her open her mouth, ready to ask you to slow down again. Before she has the chance, you flick the radio on, the opening psychedelic tune of Devin Townsend’s True North urging you to speed along further. The music soaks into your entire being, and as you drive, singing along, you find yourself not caring what anyone thought of you in this very moment. You were truly living your best life, and there were genuinely no consequences for doing so.

*****

Four had once again cornered One, or so he thought. Four was under the impression, that if he yelled loud enough, that One would listen to what he had to say and would kick you out of the team. For three weeks now, he’d been trying to think of different ways to prove that you weren’t a good fit with the rest of the Ghosts, but nothing he said seemed to deter One’s line of thought. None of them had a bloody clue what the next mission was, but according to One, you would be necessary. Four failed to see how, there was nothing you could do, that the others couldn’t. Sure, they would need a bit of training to get there, and to be able to get things done as quickly as you did, but he was positive that he could hack into a museum’s security cameras just as quickly as you supposedly had!

“I’m not having this discussion with you again Four.” One groaned, rubbing at his forehead with his thumb and index finger.

“But you’re not bloody listening! What if she double crosses us? Instead of breaking into a computer to steal the information we need, what if she sends it to someone else? Or gives away our location and plans?”

“Why? Why would she do that? Who would she send them to? According to all official documents, she’s dead. Just like the rest of us. There’s literally no one out there who would make a deal with a dead person, just on the off chance they actually delivered on their promises!”

Four frowned deeply, his brows furrowed and scar pulsing in his frustration. Why was this so difficult? Why couldn’t One just listen to him for once? All he wanted, truly, was for you to be safe, and to return to your old life! As glamourous as One had likely talked up the life of a Ghost, it truly wasn’t all it was cracked up to be! No one else should be subjected to this life, there was too much pain and death involved with this way of living, and you had no reason to experience it.

From behind the two men, a cloud of dust could be seen rapidly approaching, red clouds of dirt billowing around until they parted in lieu of the speeding McLaren. One moment it was miles away from the men, and the next, he could feel the heat radiating from the car as it breezed past him, before performing a donut, and coming to halt with the bonnet facing him. The tyre marks in the dirt showed just how perfect a stop the car had come to, there was no fishtailing, just clean tracks. Five was the first to emerge from the car, pressing a hand to cover her eyes, while the other rest atop the car door. Two pulled herself out next, grinning between him and One, before turning and popping the trunk. Finally, out you came, from the driver’s side no less, a cocky grin plastered to your lips as you waved at One, raising an arched eyebrow up at Four.

“Jesus Eight, I said you could drive home! Not warp us here!” Five groaned, as she helped you and Two collect things from the trunk of the car.

“Right, so who the fuck taught you to drive like that then?” One yelled out, earning a grin from you in his direction.

“When you run perpetually late like I do, and go to school on the opposite side of the city, you learn how to navigate traffic pretty damned quickly.” You quip back, slamming the trunk closed, and pocketing the keys. You, Two and Five all making your way towards your trailer.

“Don’t. Don’t fucking say it One.” Four warns, holding up a hand to the grinning man before him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about? I wasn’t going to say anything. Especially not anything about how impressive Eight’s driving skills are.” One shrugs, eyebrows raised in a look of utter innocence.

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Chapter Five out now

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batgirl-87 · 6 years

Text

Summary: The end of Fifth year approaches including the End of the Year Ball where the school says goodbye to the graduating students. While normally missed to catch up on much needed rest after Cursed-Vaults adventures, the entire gang is attending because it is Bill’s last year at Hogwarts. However, their original plan to go together as a group begins to fall apart as one by one members acquire dates to the ball. With Charlie’s recent realization of his feelings, maybe this is the best time to share them.

Word Count: ~14k

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: A little angst, language? (Swearing but in French and Irish and British slang)

Note: I wrote this for my MC/OC and Charlie since I’ve had this idea for a while and it’s sort of a personal headcanon (I hope that doesn’t deter you from reading!). I know it’s not my best work but it has been quite a while since I’ve written something like this and I am excited to get back into creative writing. This also ended up much longer than anticipated – sorry! I tried to break it up for easier reading (I made scene transition images and a header, I’m proud of myself!). Also I unfortunately am not in Fifth year yet in the game so reference to new friends is limited.

*The reference made to Charlie realizing his feelings and falling asleep together while studying may be another fic I write and if so I will link it here!

Needed information about My MC: Nereida Adelyn-Keira Black, goes by her middle names – most call her Keira but friends have a variety of nicknames for her, Charlie likes to call her Ady; born in Ireland but raised in Canada – duel citizen; demisexual

Soundtrack Suggestions: Perfect – Ed Sheeran, Under the Stars – John Legend, It Was Written in the Stars – Ella Fitzgerald, All of the Stars – Ed Sheeran

Preview: He knew it was cliché but he swore this is what it felt like. The moment he saw her walking towards him time seemed to slow, only a bit, enough for him to admire the way the bottom of her dress floated behind her as she descended the stairs and the hint of silver shimmer that glimmered much like the twinkling stars with her movements. The voices and sounds of everyone else around them faded into the background until her laughter that filled him with such warmth was the only thing he heard. And he knew it sounded cliché but he swore, for a moment, everyone else seemed to vanish and all he saw was her. And when her stormy sea eyes met his, his heart skipped a beat, he forgot how to breathe, and time seemed to stop, just for a brief a moment, as he stood there, frozen, completely captivated and mesmerized. It was cliché. But that’s how he felt.

“What about this one,” Penny asked as she held up a black gown to her bewildered best friend. The popular Hufflepuff was quite giddy as their little curse-breaking group shopped in Hogsmeade for the upcoming end of the year ball, as if she hadn’t been asked to attend every year.

“Are we all wearing black because we’re mourning Bill leaving us,” Keira asked with a small smirk earning a look from the blonde as she pulled the dress away from the young woman’s frame and hung it back up.

“Come on. How often do we get the chance to go shopping, not for school supplies, and get to dress up and attend a ball where we can spend the whole night dancing and having fun? And after everything we have been through since attending Hogwarts we deserve at least one night of fun,” Penny insisted, and Keira had to admit the case she presented was difficult to argue against. When the dark haired girl failed to offer a rebuttal a smug look briefly appeared on the Hufflepuff’s face. The amateur curse-breaker spent most of her time researching and hunting down these cursed-vaults, determined to find her brother, while also managing to stay on top of her school work and somehow balance her new Prefect and Quidditch Captaincy responsibilities. Their group was pretty sure she never slept. They were always concerned for their friend who seemed to carry so much on her shoulders, yet rarely show the strain of it, and who was always the first to offer help to any of them no matter how small the task and never appeared too stressed with everything they were juggling. Hence Penny’s determination to not only have a fun day out shopping in Hogsmeade but a night of fun at the ball where they could relax and enjoy themselves and not be worried about exams or cursed-vaults or lost siblings – which, Penny herself now understood more than every after that year and losing her baby sister if even for a brief time compared to what her best friend was going through with her brother. But Keira helped her save her sister and Penny was more determined than ever to help Keira find her brother. But she was also just as determined to give Keira a break whenever she could and this ball was the perfect chance to have a whole night off!

Plus she knew how close Keira and Bill were, he quickly becoming a surrogate older brother for her, and him leaving was hard on her. Certainly they would write to each other all the time but it wasn’t the same as having him there. So this was also a good excuse to spend more time with him and have one last hoorah before he graduated.

“Therefore, your arms should be filled with dresses to try on in a classic montage style,” Penny informed before shoving aforementioned armful of dresses into the unsuspecting Slytherin’s arms. “And most importantly, we should be having fun!”

As her grey eyes studied the grinning blonde in front of her Keira swore the young potions master literally glowed and radiated light. “Okay, okay,” she easily conceded earning a squeal of excitement from her friend.

“We rarely get the chance to wear formal gowns and you two want to wear suits instead?” As Keira changed in one of the dressing rooms, after being pushed there by Penny, she overhead Penny scolding others in their shopping party and was relieved to no longer have the Hufflepuff’s focus set on her. Curiosity did get the better her of, as it normally did, and caused her to peek her head out from the privacy curtain to see Tonks and Tulip looking quite dapper as they posed in formal suits men normally wore to these types of events.

“Everyone expects women to dress up in big, poufy ball gowns,” Tulip retorted. And she of course, being her rebellious self, refused to abide by any set rules even social ones.

“Besides, we look good,” Tonks added proudly as she struck another pose.

Penny huffed and folded her arms before noticing Keira’s head poking out from her dressing room. “Keira,” she gasped excitedly, “Are you ready? Come out, come out, come out,” she urged practically jumping up and down. Keira took a deep breath before pulling back the curtain to her dressing room and stepping out in an emerald gown probably chosen for the color matching her Hogwarts house.

“You look beautiful, Keira,” Rowan complimented from her seat as she watched her friends try on possible outfits for the ball. Rowan had plans to wear a beautiful embellish saree from her mother so while she waited for her outfit to be sent to her she accompanied her friends in their journey to find the perfect outfit for the occasion and offer her advice and encouragement.

“Thank you, Rowan,” Keira replied with a small smile, thankful her friend and roommate was there. She knew Rowan would provide her honest opinion and genuine praise. “And you look beautiful as well, Penny. That dress brings out your eyes,” she complimented, smoothly turning the attention away from her and onto the blonde in a blue ball gown which did make her blue eyes pop.

“Thanks but I feel too much like Cinderella,” Penny replied earning some quizzical looks from the purebloods in the group who were unknowledgeable about muggle life. After a very brief re-telling of the age old fairy tale so the others could be brought into the loop the dress up montage continued and the friendly bickering easily turned into laughter.

The windy March weather sent a chill through the group of girls as they left the store after making their purchases. Although the end of the year ball would not be held until June, to ensure there would be enough time for alterations they went out to get them early. This recommendation was brought by Andre who also offered his services to make any further alterations to the gowns they chose, after the seamstresses as the store were finished with them, to “take them up a level.” None of them were exactly sure what that meant but Andre obviously had an eye for fashion and designed most of his own clothes which always looked nice so they felt they could trust him. He also offered, well more like demanded, to accompany the girls on their shopping trip to approve of their choices but they somehow managed to convince him it was a girl’s only trip to have some girl bonding time, alone, without any men around.

Tonks and Tulip clearly had decided on formal suits which, once tailored to fit them perfectly, Keira had to admit they would probably be the best dressed at the ball. Penny had found a laced white and golden yellow dress which suited her very well, at least the group thought so. For herself, Keira had decided on an ethereal ice blue dress with a lace bodice adorned with some silver sparkle and sleeve chain detail dangling across her shoulders, the lace and hint of silver shine gradually cascading down to the flowy skirt. Something about the layers of blue, grey, and ivory of the skirt, the sheen of silver, the airy yet graceful movement of the skirt reminded her of the sea which made her feel this connection to the garment. When her other friends agreed it seemed perfect for her she bought it without any hesitation. And she had to admit, now that she found a dress she actually felt beautiful in she was looking forward to the ball and any reluctance or insecurities she had about attending washed away with the wave like movements of the dress.

“I don’t understand how you can stand being out here without a jacket,” Penny remarked as she hugged her jacket to herself to shield her from the wind chill on that cloudy day.

“I was raised in Canada, you get used to the cold,” Keira replied, adjusting the sleeves of her shirt down over her hands. However the cold from the snow and cold from the wind were different. The still cold from a winter’s day was actually peaceful and calm while the chill from the wind seemed to sting right to the bone. And she hated the wind.

“I think it’s impressive,” Tonks said, throwing her newly discovered cousin a smile, earning one back. As the group of girls made their way through Hogsmeade to return to their school they ran into the rest of their gang leaving the Three Broomsticks.

“So, how did the shopping venture go,” Andre asked, studying the group of girls closely. Andre continued to question the ladies on their way back to Hogwarts about their shopping choices while Keira wisely fell a few steps back to avoid the conversation. The windy weather drowned out the conversation of those in front of her causing the young Slytherin to shiver. Okay, next time she would bring a jacket even if it did go against her cool, tough reputation she tried to uphold. Ugh, she hated the wind.

After another gust of wind sent another icy chill through her slender frame, Keira was surprised to suddenly feel a weight on her shoulders and a warmth spreading through her. She glanced briefly at the large jacket now draped over her shoulders before looking up at the smiling, dragon obsessed Weasley.

“You were cold,” Charlie answered her unspoken question.

“But… what about you,” Keira asked, motioning to the sweater clad Gryffindor who assured her he would be fine – he was always warm, which was true. He seemed to radiate heat which the always cold to the touch Slytherin appreciated. Besides, they were almost back to Hogwarts.

His assuredness convinced Keira to drop it instead of arguing with him and just graciously accept his jacket, which she truly was thankful for, more than he might know. She was so used to doing things for herself, struggling to let others help her with anything. Her friends were already putting themselves in danger by helping her find the cursed-vaults and her brother, she didn’t need to bother them with other, trivial things. She could take care of herself. But she had to admit it was nice having someone do something for her, take care of her, even if it was something little like offering her their jacket. Although it was a little weird to think someone had also been paying that much attention to her to notice her shiver a little bit at a gust of wind. Shouldn’t he be participating in the conversation instead of watching her? Weirdo…

“Thank you,” Keira said as she slipped her arms through the sleeves of his jacket. His kindness and thoughtfulness spread a warmth throughout her chest. He really did make her want to be a better person. “Hmm,” she murmured as she snuggled up in his oversized jacket, keeping her thoughts to herself.

“What? Is something wrong,” Charlie asked with some concern.

“No,” Keira quickly replied to reassure him, but as he continued to stare at her she knew that answer wasn’t enough to satisfy him. “It smells like you,” she explained, which should be obvious considering it was his jacket.

“It…. What,” Charlie asked, clearly not expecting that answer.

“It smells like you,” Keira repeated with a smile as a small blush began to spread across the Gryffindor’s face.

“Oh, well…I’m sorry, probably smells bad then,” he replied somewhat awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. With all his adventures roaming the Forbidden Forest plus sweaty Quidditch practices and games, he worried it might not smell the best.

“No, it doesn’t,” Keira replied with a small laugh causing the Gryffindor to blush more. “It smells good,” she assured him, throwing him another smile. “Kind of earthy, but sweet.”

Charlie stared at her a moment silently. Her description of his scent only made him redder in the face. Unaware to the amateur curse-breaker, the future dragonologist had recently, very recently, burst out of his oblivious bubble and realized that he may actually have feelings for her that were more than one felt for a close friend, primarily with the help of his older brother.

It had hit him harder than any bludger had but practically knocked the wind out of him all the same. The weird thing was there was nothing particularly special about that day or how it happened. The gang was studying in the library, well in the Study Area to avoid Pince, or avoid an intense standoff between Tonks and Pince, like they normally did, and also as they normally did, they distracted themselves with idle chit-chat and random discussions to avoid actually doing their homework. And because Charlie was there, of course the conversation somehow got turned onto dragons.

“A Hungarian Horntail can breathe fire to fifty feet. Their breath alone can reach extremely high temperatures,” Charlie argue.

“But a Ukrainian Ironbelly’s scales are hard as steel and they’re huge,” Barnaby retorted. “One could probably just sit on a Hungarian Horntail and squash it.”

“Not to sound like Pince but could you two keep it down? You’re distracting me.” Tulip interrupted their dragon debate while hunched over a piece of parchment she was scribbling on vigorously, however it did not look like any homework they had but more like some sort of blue prints, probably for her next grand prank.

The two boys mumbled their apologies. “Do you think I could turn into a dragon,” Tonks asked from next to Tulip. “Never tried it before.”

“Which dragon would you turn into,” Barnaby asked curiously, and a bit excitedly. How cool would it be if she did?

“I don’t know, whichever,” Tonks responded with a shrug.

“Not everyone has a favorite dragon like you two,” Tulip informed the two magical creature obsessed boys sitting across the table from them. That was a harsh reality Charlie had learned at a young age. He used to assume everyone had a favorite dragon, asking everyone he came across what theirs was. He soon learned the sad truth that not everyone had one or even knew that much about dragons, cared as much about them as he did. Still, he couldn’t stop himself from asking people because some people did have a favorite and he felt that said a lot about them. Of course most seemed to say the Hungarian Horntail, possibly because it was the most infamous of the breeds. He actually got kind of annoyed that being most people’s answer. Maybe that’s why he liked discussing it so much with Barnaby because he didn’t share the same favorite breed of dragon.

“Well that’s dumb, they should,” Barnaby said with frown. Charlie chuckled and had to agree before turning his attention to the Slytherin sitting across from him who had been quiet this entire time, focused on reading their Alchemy book.

“What about you, Ady? What’s your favorite dragon,” Charlie asked, for some reason unable to recall if he’s asked her that before. He must have since that was normally his go-to ice breaker but conversation always seemed to flow so easily with her and typically the conversation revolved around the Cursed-Vaults if not school and Quidditch. Maybe he never got the chance to ask her? Or he did but… how could he forget her answer? He did ask everyone he came across practically. Maybe that’s why he couldn’t remember her answer? They all got jumbled together. But how could he forget her answer?

“A Hebridean Black, right,” Barnaby answered with a proud grin before Keira got the chance. The dark haired girl glanced up at him from her book giving him a smirk and a wink to indicate he was correct causing Barnaby to grin more and sit up straighter, proudly, in his chair. Charlie looked between the two Slytherins, well aware of how close they were but part of him couldn’t help be a little envious. But more prominent than that was the fact that she had in fact told them her favorite dragon – and she actually had one that was not a Hungarian Horntail! – and he had forgotten! How could he have forgotten?!

But yet even more impactful was the fact that after Keira agreed to help him buy an alleged dragon egg, which of course turned out to be scam, putting herself in danger for it, for him – something he was clearly still dealing with – they were gifted a dragon scale. A Hebridean Black dragon scale. Which Keira told him, urged him, to keep.

“Why would you give me the scale if it’s your favorite dragon,” Charlie asked, watching her closely. In case he didn’t feel selfish enough making her go on that wild and dangerous goose chase to get himself a dragon egg now he took the one good thing that came out of it from her.

“Because you love dragons,” Keira replied with a shrug, as if it was obvious, before looking up at him from her book with a small smile. It was a simple statement that everyone knew, even those who didn’t even know him, but for some reason when she said it just then it stirred something inside of him. She was selfless, thoughtful; she put him first.

When her eyes, which he liked to describe as the color of the ocean after a storm – that’s when Bill claimed he knew Charlie was completely smitten – met his they pierced right through him shattering the naïve and oblivious bubble he had subconsciously placed himself in and realization washed over him like an ice-cold tidal wave.

He loved dragons, but he also –

“I got to go.” And with that Charlie quickly gathered up his books, swung his bag over his shoulder, and hurried out of the library. He raced straight back to the Gryffindor Dorm and to his older brother and best friend where he then proceeded to pace back and forth in Bill’s room rambling on and on for about an hour about everything he had realized, had been thinking and feeling, trying to make better sense of it all. He was thankful his brother was so patient and understanding during it all. He went to bed that night unable to sleep and just kept staring at the dragon scale on his nightstand, thinking about her. And then the next day when they fell asleep studying didn’t help him either. Fortunately, she hadn’t behaved differently around him after that. Oh, but he was sure his behavior had changed around her.

Since this jarring realization had occurred he had come to gain more self-awareness – why when she looked at him his heart skipped a beat, why when she laughed, particularly when he was the cause of it, it warmed him inside, why his thoughts always turned to her, why he always sought her out to talk to or spend time with when he had free time, why he disliked it so much when she appeared to be getting too close and friendly with others, or why he had been caught a few times staring at her. He had also gotten much more annoyed by others being close with her, trying to get closer to her (okay guess some might call it jealousy), and particularly annoyed at blatant flirty primarily done by Diego (he sometimes really wanted to punch that guy). Despite this realization the heart skipping a beat, the breath getting caught in his throat, the dragons in his stomach, none of it stopped.

But the bad thing was Charlie had caught himself doing these weird things like starting to drape an arm around her or wanting to reach up to move a strand of hair out of her face, shifting so their legs or arms touched while sitting next to each other, staring at her hand swaying next to her as they walked. He even caught himself reaching out to hold it on occasion but thankfully stopped himself before that happened. He had no idea how he would explain that.

He looked for any excuse to talk to her, spend time with her, be near her, touch her… he had no idea what to do in this situation, it was all new to him! Bill suggested telling her how he felt but Charlie was worried about possibly losing a close and dear friend. So Bill suggested to flirt with her and see how she responded, maybe she was interested too but afraid to say anything, but Charlie didn’t know how to do that! Like he told his brother, this was an entirely new situation for him and he was trying his best to navigate it!

Keira silently watched the rain fall as she leaned against the cool stone wall of Hogwarts. She was currently perched upon a covered balcony on the fourth floor of the school, one of the few places she liked to go to be alone and enjoy the weather, particularly a rainy day without having to be out in it or a window dividing her from it. Unlike most who found rainy days like this grey, cold, and depressing, Keira always found them serene and relaxing. And right now she needed a peaceful place to think.

It had been a little over a month since their shopping excursions in Hogsmeade for the ball and since then their plans to go together as a group had sort of fallen apart. It had started with Penny who, while sitting in the Great Hall one day for a meal, informed the girls that she had been asked to the ball. That announcement came as no surprise since Penny got asked out pretty much on a daily basis since she arrived at Hogwarts. However, the fact she was announcing it was odd.

“…And you accepted,” Keira asked, or more like stated, suspecting that was the reason for Penny informing them and the weird way she was acting, like she was worried she would get in trouble.

“W-well, yeah, kind of…” Penny admitted sheepishly. “But that doesn’t mean we still can’t all go together! There’ll just be one more of us.” Honestly the group was just surprised to hear she had actually accepted one of the many romantic invitations she received. But she wouldn’t have just accepted anyone’s invitation so clearly they had to be deserving, right? One more person couldn’t hurt.

From there it sort of snowballed.

Tonks and Tulips had derived so many plans for that night at the ball to mess with basically everyone in attendance with a grand finale to end the night, they informed the rest of their friends they would probably be pretty busy during the actual festivities. They invited Keira to join them if she wanted but, to be honest, she wasn’t that into pranks. Not like the ones those two did at least.

Andre of course had his choice of dates to take to the ball which he was in the process of narrowing down.

Bill of course would be busy with his class of graduates.

And Ben…well Keira gave him the benefit of the doubt that he was being controlled to attack her and she still was there for Ben whenever he needed a friend but she had been keeping her distance since the attack.

But Keira thought she would at least have Rowan to go with and spend an evening dancing and having fun with her best friend and roommate.

“You’re what?!” Keira’s exclamation echoed throughout the Slytherin Common Room.

“I’m going to the dance with Diego,” Rowan said again quietly, avoiding eye contact with her best friend.

“What? How? When?” Keira had so many questions! Sure, they chatted in Defense Against the Dark Arts sometimes but she had no idea they had grown this close! And sure, she admitted while in class she encouraged the light flirtation between the two and she did believe Rowan had a small crush on him but she was not prepared for this.

But she wanted her friend to be happy and assured her of that and to go to the ball with him, once the shock wore off that is. She would have a lot of fun and a night full of dancing.

And she still had Barnaby! Next to Rowan, Penny, and Charlie, Barnaby was one of the people Keira felt closest to. She loved Barnaby like a best friend or brother or second cousin. So imagine her surprise when Barnaby said he too had a date to the ball.

“I think I have a date,” Barnaby awkwardly explained when Keira asked him about going to the ball.

“You think?” How did one not know? Well, it was Barnaby.

“Well, I was talking to this girl in Care of Magical Creatures and she brought up the ball and I guess she sort of asked me and I said yes? I didn’t realize she was asking me to go with her, like as a date, until she told me the color of her dress yesterday to make sure we matched… because apparently we are going together…” Keira’s face fell as she listened to Barnaby explain his situation. “I’m sorry, but I didn’t want to disappoint her. I mean, I did sort of agree to go. Would be rude to back out now.”

“No, of course. You’re right. You should go with her. I’m sure you’ll have fun,” Keira assured him although it was hard to hide the disappointment in her voice. But she couldn’t ask any of her friends to ditch their dates for her.

“I’m sorry,” Barnaby apologized again. “But we’ll still see each other there! And I promise to save a dance with you.”

“Thanks, Barnaby,” Keira replied with a small smile.

Her friends deserved a night of fun just like her and if going with a date added to that then they should go with a date of their choice. Even if that meant her night might be less enjoyable… The girls still agreed to all get ready together which would be fun and Penny kept insisting they would just all go together as one large group but Keira knew even if they arrived all together in one large group the couples would pair off to have their night to themselves. As they should! She didn’t want to ruin any of her friends’ night. But she still couldn’t help being disappointed and feeling left out. She even considered not going but she couldn’t do that to Bill.

So now here she sat, watching the exposed half of the balcony ledge she was sitting on get struck by rain drops, trying not to feel sorry for herself. How could she when she had all these wonderful friends? Friends who she never thought she would have given her family’s history. She was very thankful and appreciative for them. But it was hard not to feel like… like she was being left behind.

Rowan and Penny had been their every encouraging selves throughout this little situation. Besides still getting ready and going to the ball together they were certain Keira would get asked. They were surprised honestly that she didn’t get asked out more often. Surely many people at the school fancied her? She was not only a great Quidditch player but Captain, and as Penny liked to point out, Quidditch players were very popular. Plus she was smart, funny, charming, attractive, and brave according to Rowan. Who wouldn’t want to be with a Curse-Breaker? That was one of, if not the, coolest things to be. And Keira was basically the definition of cool – Rowan always laid on a lot of compliments. Which Keira appreciated and it did help her feel better about herself but she kept the truth from them and replied with a simple thanks.

Truth was it didn’t matter how good she was at Quidditch or how smart she was or how good her grades were, how many witty remarks she made, how many adventures she went on, or how physically attractive she may apparently be – something that was supposed to run in the Black family according to rumors she heard – no one would ever be interested in her more than the interesting, and possibly, cautionary tale she was. Sure, her ‘alleged’ curse-breaking adventures around the school fueled rumors and were cause for most of the excitement around the school but she was basically some glorified article in the Daily Prophet – provided some captivating entertainment but the stories were most likely riddled with false and over dramatic information.

Truth was, she was cursed.

Not cursed like ‘I’ll never get a date because something’s wrong with me and I’m cursed’ and not cursed like ‘if I get kissed I’ll turn into a frog.’ It had nothing to do with dating or romance really.

Cursed like if you get close to her you may end up dead. Or at the very least seriously injured and used as a puppet for some dark witch or wizard.

She was cursed from the first moment she walked into Hogwarts and she still would be when she left.

While the students loved to talk about her and her ‘alleged’ adventures none of them wanted to actually talk to her, get to know her for her. They were all afraid of her. And not afraid of her because she was a tough badass who would knock all your teeth out which she would be fine with. But afraid because she put those who were close to her in danger.

How she still had friends she had no idea. She never thought she would have them and once she did she never thought they would stick around. Not after everything she put them through. And she never wanted to put them through such traumatizing and deadly conditions but those seemed impossible to avoid when dealing with these Vaults. But they continued to stick around and offer to partake in these adventures still, why she had no idea, but she appreciated it nonetheless.

“Hey! There you are!”

The cheery greeting snapped Keira out of her thoughts and she turned her head to see the grinning Gryffindor Seeker who appeared to have gotten caught in the rain with his wet hair and clothes dripping to the floor to create a small puddle around his feet.

“Out dancing in the rain,” Keira asked with a small smirk.

“Oh, no,” Charlie laughed as he reached up with his free hand to push back his bangs which kept falling into his eyes by the weight of the water. “Got caught in the rain on the way back from Hogsmeade. I like to reward the team after a good game or practice with a trip to Honeydukes,” he explained. “Uh, here. I got you something.” Charlie tossed the small package he was holding in his hand to her.

Keira caught the package and took a moment to study it. “Pink Coconut Ice. Thanks,” she read before smiling at the now blushing redhead. He always brought her something from Honeydukes after he went there with his team and she always appreciated the sweet gesture, especially knowing the Weasley’s were not the wealthiest family. Normally it was Toffees or Chocolate Cauldrons, or anything chocolate. She was sure he brought the rest of the group something to, although she hadn’t seen him hand any out to them, but he never handed out hers in front of them either. She assumed it was to keep them from fighting over the candy.

“Yeah. You’re like the only person I know who likes coconut so I thought you probably like those,” Charlie explained, his blush just growing more with his explanation.

Keira smiled more as she watched him nervously rub the back of his neck. “Yeah, I do. Thanks. It’s very thoughtful.”

There was a slight lull in the conversation which did not help Charlie’s nerves. So he had to say something to end it. Anything! Just say something!

“You know, I should give you my jacket to wear again.” Keira looked over at him quizzically. “…Be-because it doesn’t smell much like you anymore.”

Oh merlin. What did he just say? Why would he say that? She was going to think he was a complete git! He thought things were awkward before, well they certainly were now!

While this panic ensued inside the second eldest Weasley, Keira was still trying to make sense of it. “…Why would you want it to smell like me?”

Okay, maybe this was his chance for redemption!

“Well, because… you smell better than me,” Charlie answered with a shrug before mentally kicking himself. He should have just given her the candy and left!

Keira watched him a moment before laughing which visibly relaxed the Gryffindor. “You don’t smell bad, Charlie, stop worrying that you do. You smell nice.” While thankful she did not get offended or weirded out by his comments, her compliments meant to reassure him only caused a slight blush to appear on his freckled face. Fortunately, he managed to stop himself this time before saying more inappropriate comments about how nice she smelled.

“So, what are you doing up here,” Charlie asked after a moment, stepping closer to her.

“Just enjoying the rain. And thinking,” Keira replied, looking back out at the grey, cloudy sky. There was a slight pause in the conversation as, unaware to her, Charlie took a moment to admire her in that setting.

“Thinking about what,” he finally asked.

Keira took a deep breath before replying. She informed him how their group’s original plan to go together to the ball to send Bill off in style was no longer the plan. Everyone had dates, whether with another person or a date with chaos as it was for Tulip and Tonks. Which, she was happy for them, don’t get her wrong, they deserved to have a night of fun but…

“…But,” Charlie gently pried when Keira fell silent, stepping closer and leaning against the castle wall next to where her feet were perched to face her.

Keira took another deep breath as she watched the rain drops hit the ledge of the balcony. “But… It kind of feels like they’re moving on,” she answered quietly. “I know it’s dumb,” she added quickly, glancing up at him. “But that’s how it feels. Like they’re moving on and leaving me behind.”

“Just because they have dates to the ball or start dating doesn’t mean your friendship with them has to end.” Charlie was always ever the reassuring one. “Or are you really just upset because you don’t have a date,” he teased, earning a small glare from her. He was probably just trying to lighten the mood. “I’m surprised you haven’t been asked yet since I’m sure you have plenty of admirers around the school…”

Keira continued to glare at him, trying not to smile but it was proving to be very difficult. “Oh, but Charlie, haven’t you heard? I’m cursed.” The words stung him more than they did her. “Don’t think anyone is going to be asking me out any time soon,” she added, looking out again at the view. Before he had a chance to speak, to point out how wrong she was and passionately make his case that she was not cursed, Keira continued.

“It’s not just about them potentially dating, it’s about them connecting with new people who they will prefer spending their time with. People who aren’t going to put their lives in danger every year,” Keira tried to explain. She couldn’t help always having this anxiety and fear that her friends weren’t really her friends or would move on from her and make new friends who, like she said, wouldn’t be putting their lives in danger. She never thought she would have friends and now she was constantly afraid of losing them somehow.

“They’re not going to stop being your friend.” Charlie’s voice once again pulled her out of her negative thoughts. “Sure, searching for these vaults and breaking their curses is dangerous but it’s much more exciting than just sitting around gossiping about who’s dating who and studying for exams. If they didn’t want to help you they wouldn’t be. And they want to help you because they care about you. You have to give your friends more credit.”

Keira smiled back at the kind Gryffindor. “See? I told you it was dumb,” she laughed sheepishly.

“It’s not dumb,” Charlie tried to reassure. “Maybe silly and ridiculous, but not dumb,” he teased earning a small laugh from the Slytherin.

“And you’re not cursed,” Charlie added suddenly, much more sternly than the previous lighthearted tone. “And anyone who says you are is just intimidated by how brave and resilient you are while handling the situation you’re in.” Keira stared in shock at his short, passionate speech and his rarely seen intensely serious demeanor. Even while playing the fiercest game of Quidditch he was still all smiles and jokes. She fell silent as she let his words sink in, glancing away from his intense gaze.

“And, hey, we can always go together,” Charlie reminded her after a moment. He was part of this group too and he didn’t have a date. Well not yet…

“You’re sweet but I don’t want a pity date,” Keira replied. “I mean, you should go with who you want to go with, who you’ll have fun with. Like your Quidditch team,” she suggested, unsure what that strange look on the Seeker’s face was.

Honestly Charlie wasn’t sure how to feel either. Somewhat offended that she thought he would only ask her out of pity, hurt that she rejected him, but also dumbfounded that she really thought he wouldn’t want to go with her when she was the one person he would want to go with the most, the one he knew he would have the best time with. Before he could say anything more she spoke up again.

“Hey, is Percy free,” she joked.

Charlie’s hand flung up to his heart as he feigned heartbreak. “You would rather go with Percy than me?” The betrayal!

Keira laughed and shook her head. “No, of course not,” she assured. “But I can’t ask you to go with me out of some sort of obligation.” She held up a hand to stop him before he started to dispute with her.

“Well guess I better go get into some dry clothes,” Charlie said as he looked down at his still damp sweater. He knew better than to try and argue with her when her mind was already set.

“Yeah, you’re starting to smell like mildew,” Keira teased with a smirk.

“I thought you said I smelled good!” The two laughed before Charlie motioned for them to get going.

“What? You need me to pick out your clothes like your mum does for you?” Charlie tried to narrow his eyes at her but was unable to keep from smiling. He knew her teasing was a weird way of showing her affection.

“No. I just thought we talked, hopefully you’re feeling better because of it, so we can go now.” Keira studied him closely a moment before a devilish smirk slowly spread across her face.

“Charlie… Are you uncomfortable with me sitting on the ledge?”

“What? No,” Charlie scoffed, although it wasn’t very convincing.

“Is the big, brave, courageous Gryffindor scared,” Keira continued to mock.

“No,” Charlie claimed, stubbornly folding his arms.

Keira only smirked more before shifting to lean out the opening. “Oh no, I’m going to fall! Help me Charlie!”

“Very funny. This doesn’t affect me. I don’t care.” Charlie continued to act unfazed as Keira continued to pretend to be falling off the balcony. “I know you think this is getting to me but it’s not. This doesn’t freak me out. At all. I’m fine. I don’t – Okay, will you stop that!” He had finally had enough when she was hanging half out into the air and reached out to grab her arm before yanking her back inside. She was going to give him a heart attack!

Keira just laughed as she regained her footing. “Aw, I knew you cared.”

“I should have let you fall,” Charlie muttered, although as usual he was unable to keep from smiling.

“You would never let me fall.” And with that she turned to leave, opening up her bag of candy he brought her before popping one in her mouth. “And thanks again for the candy,” she called with a wave as she headed down the hallway leaving Charlie staring after her.

‘Addison, will you go to the ball with me?’

The fireworks request lit up the sky in the courtyard. Yep, it was that time of year again with grand proposals to the dance. Normally this was only done by the older students but now most people in Keira’s year were participating as well – guess they were getting older.

Besides the fireworks there had been singing telegrams, poorly written poems read out loud in the Great Hall, end of presentation surprise asks, time-outs used in Quidditch to ask someone in the stands, a scavenger hunt – which Keira had to admit was a good one, probably the best one she’s seen yet – and notes hidden in text books or even just a note passed in class. There were many more elaborate, extravagant gestures asking people to the ball but she couldn’t keep up with all of them.

On one hand they were a bit obnoxious and could put people on the spot, putting the pressure on them to accept. On the other hand, if done correctly such as it being personal and meaningful to the person being asked, like that scavenger hunt, and by the right person, it could make someone feel very special. Fortunately, the Professors were more lenient with the students’ and their ball proposal shenanigans during this time.

“Keira, you forgot your telescope!” She had been so focused on getting the students organized in an orderly fashion to head up to the Astronomy Tower she had completely blanked!

“Merde! Thanks, Rowan. Can you start leading everyone up there? I’ll catch up. Barnaby will help.” Before Rowan even had a chance to respond Keira was already running back to the Slytherin Common Room. She knew Rowan would handle it.

Rowan watched her friend run off before instructing everyone to follow her and starting to lead the way to class. “Yeah, you heard her, get going,” Barnaby commanded, doing his best to help. However, his eagerness to help earned him getting hit in the head by a balled up piece of parchment. “Okay, who threw that? You’re going to get it in Dueling Club, Reyes!”

Keira hurried back to her Dorm and located her telescope in her room before hurrying back to catch up to the rest who were already making their way up the long winding staircase of the Astronomy Tower. “J’en ai ras le cul with stairs,” she swore under her breath as she climbed the seemingly never ending staircase. She tended to prefer swearing in French believing she could get away with it more than if she did so in English.

Professor Sinistra greeted the group of Slytherin students as they reached the top of the Tower. “Where is your Prefect, Miss Black?” Rowan and Barnaby shared a look.

“Was that a shooting star,” Rowan suddenly exclaimed, pointing behind Professor Sinistra causing her to quickly turn around just in time to miss Keira sliding to a halt next to Barnaby.

“What? Where,” the Professor questioned before Rowan sheepishly admitted she was mistaken, probably just saw something, a lightning bug perhaps. Professor Sinistra frowned at her before looking over at Keira curiously. “How nice of you to join us.”

“What? I’ve been here the whole time,” claimed Keira as Barnaby nodded his head to confirm. The Professor gave her a look but fortunately told them to go set up their telescopes instead of punishing her for being late – allegedly being late.

Keira set up her telescope next to Rowan before taking out a quill and some parchment from her bag, thanking her friends for helping her out. Despite the rush to get to class, the class itself seemed to move very slowly. At least they were able to enjoy the fresh air and a beautiful scenery instead of being stuck sitting in a stuffy classroom.

“Why is there a constellation named after a dragon but not a kneazle,” Barnaby questioned as he stared up at the night sky through is telescope as the class drew close to being over.

Keira laughed slightly and glanced over at her fellow Beater from marking the constellation of Draco on her parchment. “You ask such thought provoking questions, Barnaby.”

“Really?” Barnaby moved away from his telescope to grin at her. “Normally I’m told I ask dumb questions and to shut up.”

Keira frowned slightly as she glanced down before looking back up at him with a smile. “Well I think you ask very interesting questions that no one else would think to ask. And that’s important, to have a different way of thinking, a different perspective.”

“You’re always so nice to me,” Barnaby replied causing Keira’s heart to ache slightly instead of relishing in the compliment. She knew he meant well and she was glad to always see him so happy when she did compliment and encourage him but it was also so depressing to hear how he had been treated so poorly by most people in his life.

“I just treat you how you deserve to be treated,” Keira told him. “And you’re my best friend.” She gave him another reassuring smile before looking through her telescope and frowning. “Hey, wait. Were those there before?” She looked back and forth between the mapped out constellation she drew and the starry night sky through her telescope which were no longer matching up. Now there appeared to be more stars appearing in the sky. She wasn’t sure how that was possible exactly but it was ruining everything she just worked on all class!

“Uh, Keira, I think you’re notes are safe,” Rowan told her as Keira scrambled to fix her constellation drawing. She paused in her frantic scribbling and looked at her other best friend quizzically who was smirking smugly at her. Why was she not panicking to fix her notes? Rowan of all people should be hurrying to do that!

“Look,” Rowan gently instructed, motioning up to the sky. “I think the stars have a message for you.”

Keira stared at her friend in confusion. What the hell did that even mean? That was oddly cryptic, especially coming from Rowan.

“What,” Keira asked but after another encouraging motion from Rowan to look up she dropped her questioning and turned her head to look up at the starry night sky.

She didn’t need her telescope to read the twinkling star-like words written in the clear midnight sky.

‘Adelyn-Keira Black, Will You Go To The Ball With Me?’

Keira stared at the message in shock, unaware of the rest of her class’ reaction. She had to read it a few times over to make sure she was reading it correctly and then had to look over at Rowan for confirmation that she wasn’t hallucinating and it really was up there written in the sky.

Once Rowan confirmed that it was, in fact, real Keira returned to staring at her starry message in disbelief. What? Why? Who?

Her eyes drifted to below the message where, as if this entire thing had been orchestrated to perfection meticulously, the dragon constellation they were just studying lay.

“Really,” Keira muttered to herself, incredulously as a small grin crept onto her face.

As if on cue a familiar redhead with a Cheshire grin appeared before her, flying gracefully on his broom.

“Eejit. Have you gone daft?”

“So, is that a yes or…” Charlie questioned with a sly smirk.

“Charlie, why,” was all Keira could muster up with a small, embarrassed laugh.

“Because, you deserve to be asked out to the ball properly,” Charlie answered. “And maybe if I did so properly you’d realize I’m serious and this isn’t a pity ask.”

Keira studied him a moment, trying to keep a neutral poker face but the smile she fought against tugged at the corners of her mouth. “I had no idea you were such a romantic.”

“Is this where I make a comment about moving the stars for you or about it being written in the stars? There’s something there, hold on, I’ll figure it out.” Keira laughed as she watched Charlie struggle to come up with whatever line he was trying to create.

“Didn’t come very prepared, eh? Maybe you should have had Bill write you some notes on what to say,” Keira teased.

“I am much more charming than Bill,” Charlie informed her before noting the look from Professor Sinistra to wrap it up. He was lucky she was allowing him to interrupt her class, even if it was the end of it. She was just glad there were not loud fireworks or anything of the sort or else she might have punished him despite the leniency the faculty showed to the students while they made their dance proposals.

That look from the stern teacher almost knocked Charlie off his broom (and his game). “Uh, so, you still haven’t given me an answer.”

Keira glanced back up at the message asking her to the ball one more moment before it would inevitably fade away – she wished Penny was there to snap a picture so she could have a keepsake to remember this moment more vividly – before turning back to the nervously waiting Weasley.

“I would love to go to the ball with you, Charlie.”

Charlie grinned from ear to ear. Not like he expected her to cruelly reject him, they were close, but part of him was still nervous she would say no with some lame excuse. He was extremely relieved, and overjoyed, that she accepted.

“Is this where I whisk you away,” Charlie asked with another sly smirk as he held his hand out to her.

“No! Absolutely not! There will be no flying off the Astronomy Tower in the middle of the night during my class,” Professor Sinistra finally interjected.

“But class is over,” Rowan gently pointed out. She was clearly happy for her best friend and didn’t want anyone, even the Professor, to ruin it! Unfortunately, Rowan’s attempt to politely disagree with the Professor only earned her a stern look before Professor Sinistra turned that stern look to the Gryffindor.

Charlie’s eyes widened slightly as he quickly withdrew his hand upon being scolded and glared at by the strict Professor. “You can whisk me off some other time,” Keira assured him. “I think right now it’s probably best if you just go.” Charlie had to agree with that statement.

He nodded his head as he timidly watched Professor Sinistra before throwing Keira one last smile. “I’ll talk to you later.” And with that, the Gryffindor Seeker flew quickly away from the Astronomy Tower just as her ask to the ball faded away.

“You better go straight back to your dorm, Mr. Weasley,” Professor Sinistra called after him before telling her class to finish up their star charts and pack up their things to head back to their own dorm as well.

It was the first time Keira didn’t complain about all the stairs as they made their way down the winding staircase. Rowan claimed she was practically skipping down the halls and could not stop smiling the rest of the night.

“Tulip, you better not let off that dungbomb,” Penny scolded sternly.

As planned, the girls were all getting ready for the End of the Year Ball together, gathered in the Ravenclaw Tower. By now, after years of inter-house friendships and Penny’s popularity that taught her how to get into any house’s Common Room, particularly when there were house parties, the gang managed to figure out to hang out together in the different house dorms. They were originally going to get ready together in the Hufflepuff Dorm but Andre insisted they get ready in the Ravenclaw Tower so he could inspect their looks and make sure they were perfect and something about the stairs helping to create a more dramatic entrance. So the girls gathered up their things and headed up to the windy Tower. However, preparing for the ball differed among them.

While most girls were doing their hair and makeup as prep for the ball, Tulip and Tonks were determining how to best sneak all their pranking supplies into the ball without it being noticed. Fortunately, their perfectly tailored tuxes had plenty of pockets! And, as Keira predicted, they looked very dashing and would probably be best dressed at the ball, which would be well deserved.

Penny sat down next to Keira with a huff once she had ensured Tulip would not accidentally let off one of her many dungbombs as they got ready. She did not want to stink all night! Her frustrated attitude soon disappeared as she watched her friend get ready for the ball. “So I heard Charlie actually moved the stars for you to ask you to the ball.”

“No, he didn’t move any stars,” Keira corrected, unable to keep from rolling her eyes at these rumors that spread around. “He said he had been working with Flitwick for weeks after class on perfecting the charm so it would appear like he wrote it in the stars.”

“And he signed it with a dragon,” Penny asked, making a small face. This dragon obsessed boy – she did not get it. Although, people may not understand her passion for potions.

“He didn’t sign it with a dragon, it was written over the constellation Draco, which Charlie claims he did not intend but I don’t know if I believe him,” Keira explained.

“Mhmm… And you’re excited to be going,” Penny asked with a slight mischievous glint in her eye.

“Sure, but I was always going regardless if I got asked to go with someone or not. I’m going to Bill,” Keira replied.

“I mean, you’re excited to be going with Charlie,” Penny specified.

“Oh. Well, sure. We’re close friends and we always have a good time together,” Keira replied with a shrug. Penny watched her friend closely with a knowing smirk. Keira glanced over at the blonde, squirming slightly under her intense gaze. “What?”

“I’m just very happy you’re going with Charlie. That this is finally happening,” Penny answered as she turned her attention back to her hair possibly as an excuse to avoid the Slytherin’s stare.

Keira frowned slightly as she watched the Hufflepuff curiously. “What does that mean?”

Penny paused a moment as she thought of how to explain this. Their group was aware there was something there between the two and admittedly, often, their conversations would turn to the topic and how oblivious the two were. However, now it seemed one of them had at least realized it while the other was still reluctant to.

“You two just seem to have this close connection. A connection you two don’t have with anyone else. Never even seemed interested in trying to create with someone else. I don’t really know how to explain it exactly but… I’m just happy for you. I think this is good for you,” Penny told her with a small smile.

“Because I won’t be sitting all alone at the ball, moping in a corner somewhere,” Keira teased earning a small laugh from the Hufflepuff.

“No, well… sort of. I think it is good you’re going with Charlie to the ball so you’ll have a fun time, which you deserve,” she pointed out as the Slytherin appeared to almost argue with her. “But I also think it’s good for you to be…exploring this connection you have with Charlie and taking it to another level. I know you put on a brave, cool and collected front but I know everything you’ve been going through all these years is really hard on you. When I lost Beatrice, for a short time compared to what you’ve been through with Jacob, I was an emotional wreck. Crying all the time, always in a panic, frantic, literally pulling my hair out. I don’t know how you cope with it with death threats on top of it.”

“I have you guys,” Keira answered, giving Penny a small smile. “I don’t know what I would do without all of you,” she admitted quietly.

Penny smiled back at the Slytherin and reached over to place a hand on hers. “We’re always going to be here for you, Keira.” The two shared a quiet moment together before Penny continued with her original point.

“Even with the support of our great group of friends, you still keep a lot inside. And you need someone you can talk to, like really talk to. Be open and vulnerable with who you trust and can rely on. And someone who makes you happy. Because you deserve to be happy too. And I think Charlie is that person.” Keira sat there silently as she let Penny’s words sink in. She didn’t realize Penny or any of her friends thought about her this much, or her and Charlie. What did they talk about exactly when she wasn’t around?

“Here,” Penny said as she pulled something out of her bag she brought with her to help her get ready for the ball. She slid the item over to Keira who stared at it in disbelief.

“What? How?” Laying before her on the table was a picture of that night where Charlie asked her to the ball, the starry message in the sky, Charlie appearing in front of her on his broom with that cheeky grin.

“I have eyes and ears everywhere. Everywhere,” Penny informed. “I know everything going on in this place. Everything.” Keira stared at her friend a bit fearfully. Everywhere? Everything? Why did that sound more like a warning? Penny was more powerful than most people knew or wanted to admit. But that was one of the many reasons Keira loved her.

“My hair is being positively unruly. Can you guys help me, please,” Rowan pleaded as she sat down with a huff between the two girls. She was never one to do her hair or wear makeup and all of this was confusing to her. Which was hard on her because she was so smart and excelled in all her classes but she couldn’t figure out how to do her hair?

“Of course we can help,” Penny assured her with a beaming smile, moving behind Rowan to fix the tangled, frizzy mess she somehow made.

“Here, I’ll help you with your makeup,” Keira offered, moving to do just that.

“Thanks. I know it’s kind of stupid to be fretting so much over all this stuff but, Penny is right. We never get to dress up in fancy gowns and get all done up for a glamorous evening and I think we should take advantage of it. Go all out,” Rowan said, clearly relieved to be getting help.

“I don’t think it’s stupid, I completely agree,” Keira assured her with a small smile. “It’s not every day we get to do this – do up our hair, play with makeup, dress up – it should be fun, not stressful, because we deserve to have some fun.” Penny beamed from behind Rowan, glad these girls were finally coming around.

Penny and Keira helped Rowan with her hair and makeup and honestly that little makeover was probably the most fun they had all night, talking, joking, laughing, especially when Tonks and Tulip got involved, dancing and singing loudly, and obnoxiously, to the music Penny played, and overall bonding.

“Let’s go, ladies. The guys are waiting and the feast is about to start.” At Andre’s call the girls wrapped up their final preparations before heading down to meet the rest of their party. Penny made sure to grab her camera and informed them all to be prepared for many, many pictures. In case any of them thought she was kidding Penny hurried down the stairs, much to Andre’s exasperation, to take pictures of the girls coming down the stairs and the boy’s reactions because she felt this entire night had to be documented. Doubtful they would go to next year’s ball and at their own graduation they may be too wrapped up in everything, although she would still probably make sure every was documented then as well. And Merlin forbid something happened to their group before graduation. People did grow up and grow apart, friendships could end, these vaults were dangerous… She just felt it was important to document as many happy moments together as possible so they could all look back on these days fondly and remember each other, no matter where they were in the world, no matter where life took them, no matter what happens in the next couple years left at Hogwarts, that part of them would always be friends.

He knew it was cliché. This wasn’t one of those romantic comedy talking and extended moving picture things that Penny brought from the muggle world and made them watch, what were those things called again? Movies, that’s right. It wasn’t a movie, a rom-com as they were apparently called if he remembered correctly. This wasn’t a scene in one of those movies where one of the main characters has a sudden epiphany upon seeing the other in a different light and realizes they have feelings for them. Of course it wasn’t one of those moments because Charlie already had that epiphany months ago.

He knew it was cliché but he swore this is what it felt like. The moment he saw her walking towards him time seemed to slow, only a bit, enough for him to admire the way the bottom of her dress floated behind her as she descended the stairs and the hint of silver shimmer that glimmered much like the twinkling stars with her movements. The voices and sounds of everyone else around them faded into the background until her laughter that filled him with such warmth was the only thing he heard. And he knew it sounded cliché but he swore, for a moment, everyone else seemed to vanish and all he saw was her. And when her stormy sea eyes met his, his heart skipped a beat, he forgot how to breathe, and time seemed to stop, just for a brief a moment, as he stood there, frozen, completely captivated and mesmerized. It was cliché. But that’s how he felt.

Gradually all the voices and sounds that had faded into the distance returned and he was jarred back into reality with a firm hand on his back.

“Well I must say I did wonders on your atrocious dress robes,” Andre praised himself as he studied his fine work on Charlie’s once embarrassing and fashion disaster of dress robes that were sent to him from his family. His and Bill’s looks for the ball were the ones Andre had to do the most work on. But he did an amazing job on fixing them up, tailoring them to perfection, and even adding personalized details for the two gentlemen such as some dragon embroidery for Charlie, if he did say so himself.

“Yeah, thanks,” Charlie chuckled, trying to hide his embarrassment of possibly being caught gawking at Keira.

“Hey. You clean up nice.” Charlie whipped his head around and stared at the beautiful girl in front of him. Keira smiled charmingly at the Gryffindor as she admired his fixed robes. She did have to commend Andre on his great job. When Bill and Charlie received their packages of dress robes they group had their fun of teasing the two. But now Charlie, and she was also sure Bill, looked quite dashing in them.

“Th-thank you,” Charlie replied, clearing his throat, before mentally kicking himself. Oh, Merlin, did he just stutter like a nervous tosser?

“Compliment her,” Andre whispered in his ear. Did he have to do everything for them?

“Oh uh…” Charlie stared at the ethereal dark haired girl in front of him as he tried to come up with a good compliment to give her. All he had to tell her, without stammering or sounding like a complete tosser, that she looked beautiful. Radiant even. Breathtaking? No, maybe that was too much even if it was true.

“You look beautiful.”

Keira smiled at him before glancing down and, he may have been mistaken but he thought he saw a slight blush spread across her face. “Thank y-“

“Like an Antipodean Opaleye.” He should have stopped at she looked beautiful. Andre groaned and smacked his forehead with his palm, muttering about how Charlie was hopeless before walking away from the couple.

Keira whipped her head up at his interruption and stared at him a moment as she processed what he just said before she started laughing. Charlie visibly relaxed when he heard her laugh and was relieved she didn’t think he was weird or a freak like most did in regards to his obsession with dragons. But that was never really a concern of his from her. She was always willing to listen to him ramble on and on about dragons, even asked him about his interest – the uses of dragon’s blood, interesting facts about the creatures, etc. – found and brought him dragon related books from the library or bookstore. And never once did her eyes gloss over as she spaced out during his ramblings nor did she ever roll her eyes or seemed annoyed or bored. She always listened intently, asked questions, and sure joked around with him sometimes about it but she never discouraged his passion.

“You’re such a dork,” Keira teased him, playfully hitting his arm and snapping him out of his thoughts. “But thank you. That’s quite the compliment coming from you.”

Perhaps just in time to save him from making a fool of himself again, Penny called everyone over to take some pictures before they headed off to the feast and ball. And when Penny said pictures, she meant photo shoot.

There were group shots of everyone, all the girls, all the guys, those who played Quidditch, Prefects, the members of each Hogwarts house; there were couple shots of dates and basically everyone in their group paired off together and other random combinations they could come up with. Some were serious, some were ridiculously posed, but the best pictures of the whole night were the candid ones Penny took of them.

Finally, after their extensive impromptu photoshoot which could have gone on longer if they hadn’t convinced Penny they were going to miss the ball entirely at this rate, the group was free to go to the Great Hall together which had been transformed. Round tables had been set up along a perimeter surrounding a dance floor. The gang was fortunate to find a table for all of them, possibly having to convince others to move to a different table so they all could sit together, and enjoyed the feast which was accompanied by speeches by the faculty wishing the graduates well. It was hard not to get emotional thinking of Bill no longer being there with them. Of course Keira and certainly Charlie would write to him almost every day but not having him there to help them would be hard. He had become the group’s surrogate older brother. It would be hard without him there.

Once the feast and speeches had concluded and the music started they were free to mingle and dance. But before any dancing was done Keira wanted to see Bill – get the emotional stuff done and over with so they could enjoy the rest of their evening.

She hugged the eldest Weasley tightly, refusing to let go but Bill didn’t seem to have any problems with that. “I’m going to miss you.”

“I know, I’ll miss you too. But I’ll write to you all the time,” Bill promised. “And you’re going to write to me too, right? I need to be kept up to date on all your Cursed Vaults adventures.”

“As long as you keep me informed about all your Curse-Breaking adventures too,” Keira negotiated before demanding him to stay safe.

“After all these years of hunting down and break these Cursed Vaults, I am prepared to handle anything, thanks to you,” Bill assured her before smiling warmly down at her. “I’ll be safe, I promise. And you two be safe too,” he added quickly in that classic older brother tone. Cursed-Vaults, death threats, and trying to find a dragon in the Forbidden Forest amongst all the dangerous creatures lurking in there – they were in more danger than he was!

Keira reluctantly let him go as Bill began to address Charlie and lecturing him on being the eldest brother at the school now. With Bill gone, Charlie had to watch out for his little brothers. Percy shouldn’t be any trouble but next year the twins would be arriving and Charlie had to look out for them.

“Funny how you’re leaving just in time before Fred and George arrive,” Charlie noted.

“Yeah, almost like mum and dad planned it that way,” Bill retorted with a smirk.

The two brothers continued their bickering for a bit before Bill suggested they should be enjoying the evening instead of standing around him all night. Keira groaned slightly before flinging her arms around the towering Weasley once again.

“I’m not dying,” Bill reminded them. “You’re going to see me again.

“If you don’t get mauled to death by a Sphinx,” Charlie muttered. He tried not to show it but he was really going to miss his brother too. Bill was his best friend, well besides Keira now, but they grew up together, shared the same bedroom. He couldn’t even go to sleep without talking to Bill before going to bed, what was he supposed to do now? He talked to Bill about everything, always turning to his older brother for advice! Sure, he would write his brother letters but some things were time sensitive and needed to be said in person in the moment. And now being the eldest Weasley at the school, leaving him to watch over his younger siblings and be the role model was nerve-racking. He loved them dearly, and while Percy shouldn’t prove to be too difficult, his siblings had been known to cause some trouble and be a handful, particularly the twins.

“I’m not going to get mauled to death by a Sphinx,” Bill spoke sternly as Keira gasped and tightened her grip around him at Charlie’s comment. “I am not going to die. I’m going to be fine. And I have you guys to thank for that. Preparing me for curses and dangerous creatures. I’m going to be alright and so are you guys.” Keira’s grip loosened around the eldest Weasley as she slowly let him go, trying to hold back her emotions. She was not going to start crying at the ball. What a mood killer.

Bill gave them another brief pep talk, reassuring them they would be fine without him, he would be safe, they would write to each other all the time and if they ever really needed him he would find a way to be there. And he’d see them for holidays!

“And hey, in a couple years you’ll probably be joining me. Right, Keira?” Keira paused and mulled over Bill’s question. Honestly, she hadn’t thought much about a future outside of Hogwarts. Her whole focus while going to school was finding these Vaults in hopes of finding her brother. And of course to learn magic and all that. Especially when that was necessary to break the curses on these Vaults!

“I don’t know, maybe,” was all Keira could muster up at the moment. If she was completely honest, which she wouldn’t be at the moment because that would be a serious mood killer, but she wasn’t even sure if she would live to see graduation some times. She had made that dark, it’s-funny-because-it’s-true joke to Bill before when she suggested him to be Madam Rakepick’s apprentice instead of herself. Bill didn’t find it funny.

“They’d be lucky to have you,” Bill told her in an attempt to put any doubts or insecurities she may have to rest. “Heck, you could probably stroll right in there and be Head Curse-Breaker on your first day once they learn you broke your first curse at the age of like twelve.” Keira couldn’t help but smile at his compliment. She was really going to miss him and was going to drown him in letters, needing his wisdom and reassurance. He had easily become one of her dearest and closest best friend. And after all this was over, if she survived it, working alongside her brotherly best friend would be nice. Could be fun. Almost ideal even! Could be worse…

“Okay, you two are depressing me now. Go have fun,” Bill instructed, shooing them away.

“But-”

“No buts! You can’t spend all night crying over me, literally. Go have fun,” Bill demanded. “And I’ll see you on the dance floor or by the punch bowl. This isn’t goodbye just yet. This is about celebrating all the great times and adventures we had here together. Tomorrow we can have our tear-filled goodbyes.” Well, he did have a point. Tonight was supposed to be fun, a party. Tomorrow, on their official last day they could all cry and hug Bill and never let him go.

Despite this being Bill’s last hoorah with them, at least for now, the gang had a really fun night. They ate, drank, talked, laughed, and danced together. Rowan, albeit a somewhat awkward dancer and therefore a bit shy at first, was swung around the dance floor by Diego who seemed to really help her let loose and not be so self-conscious about her dancing. Tonks and Tulips darted all around the ball, setting off their pranks and then hurrying back over to their friends to dance with them, like they’ve been there the entire time, hide behind them, or sometimes even under the table to escape from Filch and his wrath. Tonks tried to get herself, Ben, and Talbott when he was suddenly located, “just checking things out” after claiming to not want to attend this “stupid event,” to be crowd surfed, only to have her efforts thwarted each time, unfortunately. Barnaby kept his promise and saved a dance for Keira which also provided him with the opportunity to surprise the group with his waltz and general ballroom dance skills. Didn’t all pureblood families, at least those wealthy pureblood families, learn classic, perhaps even archaic, proper etiquette such as ballroom dance or playing a classical musical instrument? (No guitars here!) Anything to show off to their other rich friends like all that somehow made their children better than others.

Overall it was a night of fun and laughter and happy memories. Memories they could look back on fondly especially with Penny capturing them all on her camera. While laughing and dancing with her friends was a lot of fun, after a while, being surrounded by so many people with so many conflicting, competing noises reverberating throughout the space, it all became a little overwhelming so Keira excused herself and headed out onto the balcony that surrounded the Great Hall.

The fresh air and cool breeze that blew her loosely curled hair was refreshing and welcoming as she stepped out onto the mostly empty balcony. She had to wander a bit to find a space for herself, away from couples who had escaped out there for their own private snogging session. She reached up to adjust the antique looking silver decorative hair pin Penny convinced her to buy for the ball that held back part of her hair before resting against the balustrade of the balcony. The quiet and stillness of the night air was peaceful and invigorating. Keira sighed contently as she enjoyed the peaceful atmosphere the calming night and faint music from inside created.

“There you are.”

Keira turned around when she heard a familiar voice behind her and smiled at her date.

“You’ve been gone for a while, just wanted to make sure everything was okay,” Charlie explained as he walked closer to her.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. Just needed to get away from all the crowds and noise for a moment,” Keira informed him as Charlie leaned on the balustrade next to her, gazing up at the clear night sky.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Charlie replied. Keira watched him a moment, admiring how the moon light highlighted his handsome face before turning to rest against the balustrade again and sunk into the comfortable silence that fell between them.

After some time Keira felt someone staring at her and turned to head to meet Charlie’s adoring gaze. There had been other times where she felt someone’s eyes on her such as during class, and she had assumed it possibly was Charlie since it seemed to always come from his direction and her friends always claimed Charlie stared at her and gave him a hard time about it, but any time she looked over he looked away and she never caught him actually doing it. But this time his gaze held strong. He didn’t appear to be embarrassed at being caught or even fazed at all.

Keira shifted nervously under his intense gaze, feeling her face heat up causing her to avert her eyes from his. “What? Why are you looking at me like that,” she asked self-consciously.

“You’re just really beautiful,” Charlie answered softly, genuinely, not trying to be funny and charming, which just caused her face to grow redder.

“I think you’ve had too much punch,” Keira replied jokingly, obviously unsure of how to handle a compliment like that delivered so honestly. And she fully admitted she may have some intimacy fears and issues.

Fortunately her comment didn’t seem to offend Charlie or ruin the mood, earning a small chuckle from him which filled her with warmth, although she didn’t really need it when her face already felt like it was on fire. She glanced over at him to catch his usual caring smile which always caused whatever winged creatures that were in her stomach to flutter.

Charlie only broke his fixed gaze on her to glance behind them, back towards where to roaring party was still raging on, as a slow melody began to flow out from the Great Hall and fill the air.

“Come on,” he said, holding his hand out towards her.

Keira looked down at his hand curiously. “What?”

“Let’s dance. They’re playing our song,” he added with a charming smile.

“We have a song,” Keira asked with a small laugh as she shyly placed her hand in his.

“We do now,” Charlie answered before taking her hand firmly in his. He spun her around once, causing Keira to laugh more, before pulling her close to him. He slid his free arm around her waist to hold her securely to him. They swayed along to the dreamy melody, gliding along the terrace as one, the romantic lyrics seeming to narrate the moment between them perfectly.

It was funny. Before he had asked her to the dance, Charlie had always been the nervous, self-conscious one around her. They still spent a lot of time together, talked, laughed, even at his lighthearted attempts at flirting and cheeky charming comments, but sometimes the nervousness would hit him. Then he would be the one with the red face, nervous laughter, and stammering; pretty sure he made quite the fool of himself. But now, ever since she accepted his proposal to the ball he had this new found confidence. Sure, she still caused fluttering in his stomach and his heart to skip a beat, still made him nervous (he did call her an Antipodean Opaleye dragon), but seeing her reaction when he asked her to the ball, getting this chance to act on his newly understood feelings and make this something real somehow ignited this determination and confidence within him.

And on the other hand, normally cool, calm, and comfortable being herself, Keira now found herself being the nervous, self-conscious one. Perhaps it was because before this she was in blissful ignorance of any deeper feelings Charlie may have for her. Sure, she had heard her friends joke about it but she never thought it was real. Charlie wasn’t one to be lusting after others, show any interest in dating or romance, something she and him had talked about before and bonded over since she felt similar, so why would he feel those feelings towards her? And yeah, maybe she did have certain feelings for him but she was too afraid to admit that to herself, let alone anyone else. Although she was pretty sure most of her friends, especially Penny and Rowan had already figured it out based on their comments and questions to her about it.

But as long as she believed there was no way he felt the same way, there was no chance of something more, she was free to be herself, no matter how ridiculous or embarrassing, and still got a very close and reliable friend who she cherished. Now suspecting he may actually have deeper feelings than friendship for her, which was just speculation still since he hadn’t ever actually said anything on the subject, Keira found herself suddenly hyperaware of her behavior, things she said, how she looked, his behavior, things he said, how he responded to things she said, how he looked at her – everything. And it was making her more self-conscious than she had ever been before, especially around him since he was the most accepting, understanding, and least judgmental person she knew. She just didn’t want to do or say anything to mess this up and lose someone so important to her.

They floated across the terrace floor slowly, gracefully, Keira quite impressed and surprised by Charlie’s dancing abilities. The entire time Charlie looked down at her warmly, unable to stop himself from smiling, and while Keira may have needed to occasionally coyly avert her gaze from his, she could not stop smiling either.

The waning moon cast its spotlight upon the dancing couple who moved together harmoniously under the velvet night sky with only the twinkling stars as their audience. The more they danced the more comfortable this felt, the more right it felt.

As the song neared its end, Keira peered up to meet Charlie’s steadfast gaze. Their eyes remained locked as they gradually slowed to a stop but neither made a move to part from the other. Instead, Charlie leaned down to close the small distance between them, his eyes falling half shut as he hesitantly brushed his lips against hers causing a spark to jolt through them both leaving a tingling sensation, a rush of anticipation as their hearts pounded in their chests.

When his lips met hers the first thought in Keira’s mind was how surprised she was by how soft they were. That thought was quickly followed by her utter disbelief and shock that Charlie Weasley had leaned down to kiss her – that he wanted to kiss anyone but especially her! Maybe she should have checked to make sure no one had drank a polyjuice potion and was parading around as him.

His hesitancy, though, spoke volumes.

This was new territory for both of them and until now he had appeared so confident in what he was doing. But now this – there was no turning back from this. Was he sure about his feelings? Was he sure about her feelings? Is this what they both wanted? Did she want this? What if him doing this ruined everything? He was unsure and nervous about making a mistake, which was valid. Neither of them wanted to lose their close friend. But his uncertainty only made her more certain that this was right, confirmed for her how much this meant to both of them. Suddenly she wasn’t afraid any longer of all the what-ifs. This is what they both wanted. This was right. And they would be fine.

Keira smirked slightly against his lips before leaning up to meet him in a silent effort to put his insecurities to rest, her eyes falling shut as she allowed herself to give into the moment. Her gesture provided Charlie with the reassurance he needed. Once he felt the enticing sensation of her lips on his, his eyes fell shut as he felt free to give into his emotions. He kissed her gently at first, both taking their time to slowly enjoy this moment and the awakening and intensity of new feelings and sensations with each other before his arm around her waist tightened and his hand grasping hers moved to hold the side of her face as their kiss grew deeper and more passionate.

Under the night sky they remained wrapped in each other’s embrace, taking a chance on expressing their long hidden feelings for one another. Once again time seemed to still and everything around them faded away until all that existed to the couple were each other and the moon and stars that shone down upon them, preserving this intimate and pivotal moment they designed.

The night sky was suddenly illuminated by countless fireworks set off from the opposite end of the balcony surrounding the Great Hall. Tonks and Tulip promised a grand finale. But neither Charlie nor Keira seemed to even notice them, lost in each other.

Keira lay on the couch in the Slytherin Common Room, staring up at the ceiling with a dreamy look and blissful grin on her face. She knew it was there and probably made her look insane or worse, love-struck, but she couldn’t stop smiling.

“Come on, Keira!” She suddenly felt herself being pulled up off the couch by Rowan who apparently had her inner dancing spirit awakened. The two girls laughed and danced around the Common Room, twirling in their dresses they refused to take off even though the ball had ended hours ago.

“Woo, dance party,” Barnaby cried before literally jumping in to join them. The Slytherin trio laughed as they danced around before Barnaby seemed to suddenly remember something. “Oh yeah, I’m supposed to give you this.”

Barnaby handed Keira an envelope and while she stepped aside to open it, Barnaby and Rowan continued their lively dancing. She studied the plain envelope curiously before opening it and pulling out its contents.

She stared at what she held in her hand in shock.

The picture the envelope bestowed showed her and Charlie on the balcony in the midst of their first kiss under the waning gibbous moon, twinkling stars, and fireworks that shot up in a spectacular explosion in the sky around them. She turned the picture over to see the date written on the back along with a message which caused an eerie chill to creep throughout her body as she nervously looked around the room.

‘I know everything that happens at Hogwarts’ ♥ Penny

Merde – Shit

J’en ai ras le cul – I have fucking had it (with stairs)

Eejit – Idiot

I think it’s safe to say we all know, or can at least figure out, the British slang words (I hope I used them correctly or else how embarrassing!)

A/N: Could I have ended it with them kissing under the night sky on the balcony? Sure. But then this idea popped into my head and I thought it was funny. You can pretend it ends with the romantic scene.(I’m still not perfectly happening with the ending scene of them kissing but I can’t keep obsessing over it and tweaking little things here and there throughout the story, I need to just post it and be done! Also still kind of wish it had a better title but whatever - ugh the perfectionist in me!)

I didn’t write this all in one sitting so hopefully it flows, and again it has been so long since I’ve written something like this but I enjoyed doing it. I know I can tend to ramble and be over detailed and I do love my commas but that’s just me being excited to write this kind of stuff again. Sorry it ended up so much longer than anticipated! I also know I could have just focused on the relationship with Charlie but I love the relationship with the whole gang and wanted to highlight that as well. Oh, and the Rowan and Diego thing – I see one screenshot of them talking/close to each other in DADA and now I kind of ship it? I don’t know…Barnaby could have possibly gone with Liz, I don’t really know her but they both love magical creatures and she is rather socially awkward so I could see her asking him to the dance without him realizing =p Or it was some other girl. Shout out to all the Addison’s out there! I kept seeing this name in reference to the game and thought ‘well this is a popular name I should use it.’

As mentioned before the reference to Charlie realizing his feelings and falling asleep together while studying may be another fic I write as well as a sort of aftermath of the ball where they make it official. I also have some other one shot ideas or headcanons I’ve mentioned in others posts I may actually write out as well (e.g. Keira getting a concussion during a Quidditch match and being caught by Charlie, Keira and Barnaby accidentally knocking a ball into the Potions classroom). I don’t know if anyone would be interested but might be something I do. I am really happy to be getting back into creative writing.

Let me know if you are interested; I noticed some people tag others to keep them updated on their fics and if you’d like that let me know! And if you have any prompt ideas or collab ideas or anything let me know too! I would just really like to connect to others, maybe even make friendships - how crazy would that be =p

~ Hope you enjoyed =)

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bicoastalbip-blog · 6 years

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EPISODE 1 RECAP

Welcome to season FIVE of Bachelor in Paradise! We are ready to attack this season from two coasts, simultaneously, armed with way too much wine and a hysterically apropos gif folder. For week one, we want to make sure everyone knows our cast of characters for this season, even if those characters turn out to be a major WHO, or Woefully Humdrum Occupant.

Tia:

A heavy hitter this season [read: someone the production will focus on for star power and sheer drama], Tia comes to Paradise on the coattails of dating Colton (from Becca's season) and stealing him away from the Bachelorette. In theory, anyway, since she hasn't made a move post-season, pre-Paradise. She is first on the beach, eventually starting a dialogue with anyone who will listen about her need to see Colton in Paradise. This is shaping up to be a very Ashley I. situation, and for anyone keeping track [Kevin], that could potentially be a good thing! Tia spends the entire first half of the episode awfully disappointed that Colton hasn’t dragged his gorilla knuckles down the sandy steps of Paradise in the time frame she was aiming for. When the producers ultimately dupe her with a date card, she chooses Chris. Tia wants "a serious relationship," and "something lasting," or at least that's what she tells the dude she's kissing right before Colton shows up. Colton eventually arrives the next day, and after artfully wasting his time pretending to talk to Kendall & Angela, swoops in on Tia and whisks her away on a yacht, during which time she rescinds her earlier, "Colton WHO?!"

Kendall:

An adorable ray of sunshine, far removed from the dead animal obsessive of Nick's season -- oh wait, she's discussing cemeteries and corpses with Grocery Store Joe. Old habits! Kendall tells the camera that "there's more to Kendall than just taxidermy and ukulele," and the editors cut to Kendall half naked in a yellow bikini, offering America the world. Kendall stays low key this episode, offering not-too-deep cuts and only slightly biting commentary throughout; she tells Joe sweet simplicities like, "I like talking to you," and, "Have you ever seen a dead body?" finally sealing the deal with a makeout session on a day bed while the producers lure Krystal away for an interview and then break the news to her.

Krystal:

Krystal is a blonde woman with whitened teeth and a fitness influencer on Instagram here to explain the "adversity" she has faced since appearing on Arie's season. In true editing reflection to Kendall's scene, Krystal says she has "a lot more to offer" while the camera pans over her bikini bod on the beach. She tells us that having a dog and knowing how to cook are the prerequisites for being a wife, which means that 70% of the men we know are going to be excellent wives. After a brief montage of Krystal's voice from the previous season, we're left wondering if she's woman who has just completed an orgasm and is rushing to meet the mailman, or, a white woman at a country club that has just crushed two Xanax into her morning Chardonnay. Krystal steals Joe away, much to Kendall's chagrin, and a fascinating conversation ensues as two white people discuss their heritage and bond over their exotic Norwegian backgrounds. Krystal licks her chops and moans, "Excellent," after finding out Joe is untainted and hasn't watched her season. She finishes off the episode in Kevin's arms, and they make out with the fervor and desperation of a man whose girlfriend has just left him for JARED and a woman who has had to adjust her voice several octaves to join this cast.

Wills:

The producers try their best to give Wills his moment of adorable redemption by putting him in various printed shirts and having him dance in a goofy way in a park.

Jordan:

Jordan whips out his slightly pudgy "model body" and declares that he's finally "in a place as beautiful as" him. He shows his relaxed, redemption ready side with a glass of white wine on his sofa whilst petting his cat. He slobbers over most of the women, including Annaliese, who doesn’t seem to mind the fact that he thinks chickens go, "Quack, quack." After multiple awkward silences with multiple women, his next victim is Nysha, whom he tells, "You only get this one life, right? You don't know where your soul or your energy is going to go after this." Nysha awkwardly agrees, and Jordan proceeds to tell her he wants to be a crab on the island. He later stirs drama by telling Chris that Colton is "a serpent" that he needs to cut the head off of, setting up next's week's storyline nicely.

Chelsea:

Our Klonopin mommy wanders down the Paradise steps with all the vigor of a woman sentenced to death, managing to say "hopeful" with all the hope of the string quartet aboard the Titanic. Chelsea spends the episode unobtrusively floating around, a human Xanax with eyes that beg you to end her suffering. She tells the producers, "I have no idea what I did to be here," followed by, "I am loving it," spoken with the cadence of someone who had to put their dog down today and then locked themselves out of their car. Chelsea's great contribution, however, is a brief dialogue with Nick that turns out to be the highlight of the episode.

Nick:

Nick starts out the ep by being a big WHO, and ends up in the hall of fame. He takes a drunken seat next to untoasted Wonderbread slice and single mother Chelsea on the day bed, and pours out his soul. "You're fucking cool as shit." Chelsea tells him she's not making the first move.

"Chelsea's a snack. A woman that has a child doesn't really bother me at all." You're right, you could just ship it off to boarding school and then it wouldn't be a bother at all.

"I love moms and moms usually love me." For a man who has had exactly .3 seconds of air time, he's managed to fit in 90% of the episode's memorable quotes.

The producers rightfully question Nick's future parenting style. He tells them, "I think I would be a great role model," and follows it up with a huge guffaw. They ask him Chelsea's son's name and he cycles through "Joey," "Danny," "Johnny," and "Slippy," before landing on "Sammy." Fifth time's the charm. He tells Chelsea he has a "super weird attraction" to her and offers to walk her up "towards her area." After she gives him the slip, Nick laments that he's spent too much time putting in groundwork with Chelsea, and now he's "thumbing his own asshole." Chelsea's kid is gonna love this guy, especially after he uses Sammy's vintage baseball card collection as coasters for his Coors light.

Eric:

"It's miracle season!" Eric trills with 20% less enthusiasm than a year ago. He has several memorable moments with Tia, telling the producers that "she's got nice teeth, long hair, nice feet, nice body," which goes hand in hand with "I have a lot more to offer," since the women are judged almost strictly on their appearance and Instagram sponsorship-worthiness.

"I like your toes, is white your favourite colour?" is another loaded question, during which Eric mentions feet again while also questioning Tia's ethnic preference in a partner right out of the gate.

Annaliese:

Annaliese gets a flashback to Arie's season, and a new clip package where she lets us know her fears include: "the dog thing," sand, thunder, large bodies of water [all literally included on the notoriously stormy coast of Mexico she's headed to], class one recycled plastics, guys with red hair, sombreros, birds, AND, the biggest thing that scares her, "not finding love." She cues the "Evan and Carly" buzzwords, a true love story for the ages that included Evan faking serious trauma and trapping Carly in a hot yurt. Annaliese tells the camera that she wants a ring, followed by marriage and babies. She seems as if she's not sure how the babies are made following the marriage, but is enthusiastic about finding out.

Chris:

Chris has a brief intro during which he feeds swans and compares himself to a goose, trying to convince the viewers that he's a goofy and fun loving weirdo and not an over perspiring sociopath. Following his date with Tia, Chris acts entirely proprietary, laughing as Nick says that Colton is getting "sloppy segundos," and generally being misogynistic.

Colton:

Colton isn't exactly worth mentioning this episode, briefly shading Tia for being the reason that he had to leave Becca after he fell in love with her. She says she understands, and feels guilty, but doesn't exactly look guilty aboard a gorgeous yacht on a date with her best friend's ex. Colton is "here to figure his shit out," and Tia wants to give it a shot. They jump happily into shark infested waters together, but escape on a Jet Ski. That last one's only partially a metaphor.

David:

David is a "former chicken," who we strongly believe should hook up with Tiara the "chicken enthusiast" from Ben's season. David provides the producers with a clip package involving him living with his mom in Florida, where she waits on him hand and foot. "Unfortunately I can't marry my mom." No, David, but you can marry a similarly aged retiree in Boca Raton and keep living the same lifestyle you're accustomed to. David has beef with Jordan, but they shake hands and go their separate ways without the bloodbath everyone predicted would follow.

Kevin:

Kevin is wearing a firefighter outfit in his intro despite harboring the needlessly creepy glare of an arsonist who's girlfriend just left him for JARED. He shades Ashley I. hard, accusing her of cheating and not helping the relationship work. He's *yikes* 34, and has heard through "The Bachelor Grapevine" i.e. the entire internet, that his ex is engaged to JARED. Is Kevin into being dominated by "fit" Krystal? Between the arson and the masochism we have some deeply rooted trauma to dig up this season.

Joe:

Grocery store Joe was kicked off of Becca's season night one, and admits he only had himself to blame by being awkward and nervous. Shortly after, "Twitter blew up" and now he's on a rainbow ride to a pot of gold filled with hair gummy vitamins. Joe's low self confidence somehow makes him more charming, and Chris Harrison tells him not to "screw it up this time." He briefly speaks to Tia about Colton, saying "I like him, he's nice" with the same enthusiasm that Chelsea uses to approach just about everything. Joe sticks with Kendall throughout the episode, which we're big fans of.

Bibi:

Bibiana is a gorgeous ray of sunshine and has brought a multitude of bikinis for Paradise. She tries to add some humour to Chris Harrison's life by declaring that the bumpy SUV ride there was "more action than her uterus has seen in a while," but he doesn't take the bait. She also lets us know that she's waiting for her "hoohah" to send her a sign, and wishes the producers would blur her ass.

John:

Venmo John deserves love! He has convos on camera with multiple women, including Angela and Annaliese, but we here at Bi-Coastal BIP ship him hard with Astrid, who is pretty and safe.

Astrid:

Pretty-but-safe Astrid is back, keeping her catty screentime to the confessional and generally staying out of everyone's day whilst posing as a plastic Solo cup filled with lukewarm water.

Angela:

A WHO straight out of an eighties Dynasty episode.

Nysha:

A sweet but misguided WHO, getting points for letting everyone know she was "blink and you miss me" on Arie's season. Nysha decides to tell Jordan she believes in reincarnation and that her soul gets "transferred somewhere else."

Kenny:

Another fan fave that is back to try, try again, Kenny is now FORTY-SIX?! And still chose to dust off his dad flip flops and matching dad tank top. We meet his eleven year old daughter and pray that her friends don't make fun of her at school.

Preview thoughts:

This season's preview has us seeing Krystal with Kenny, Angela with Eric, Krystal and Jordan, Kevin & Astrid?!, Kendall & Leo,

Joe tells us he's falling in love with Kendall, and Leo calls him a "grocery store bitch." Kendall cries, David plots ruining Jordan's summer, Jenna shows up (WHO?), Shushanah faces some assholes calling her a witch and Euro trash, Tia and Colton shed tears, and Chris claims he's falling in love with Tia. Ben shows up to shout his one and only memorable line, "I am unlovable," Amanda makes an appearance in DiffEye shades that came straight from her Instagram, and unfortunately Arie/Lauren show up as well. Human mannequins Robby and Jordan square off, Raven reminds us that she had her first orgasm in Paradise, JARED proposes to Ashley I., Carly/Evan and Jade/Tanner show up with tots in tow, more tears are shed, fights are briefly glimpsed, and Chelsea misses a Xanax dose, sobbing and struggling to breathe in her confessional. See you guys Monday!

#thebachelor #the bachelorette #bachelor in paradise #bip5 #tia booth #colton underwood #chris harrison #bachelor nation

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hooksandhappyendings-blog · 7 years

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The Case for Jonsa: Why there’s hope for season 8

I was very happy with the Wolf and the Dragon. In my opinion it leaves the door wide open for Jonsa. I know my fellow shipmates are worried, so I’ll just cut to the chase.

First, the execution of J0nerys is just not adding up.

At first, the Arya and Sansa thing had convinced me that the writers had just given up. But now that that’s been revealed to have been a clever deception, it makes me wonder why J0nerys has been so disastrously mishandled. I mean, this is supposed to be the epic ship. Their eventual demise is supposed to be heartbreaking, yet the efforts made to develop the relationship were downright lazy. I mean, not one, but TWO characters had to spell out the chemistry between Jon and Daenerys. Surely the same people who made us believe Arya might actually turn against her sister in just a few episodes could have done more to express the epic love story that is (supposedly) Fire and Ice. I mean, what kind of OTP doesn’t even get an onscreen first kiss?? Thank God this isn’t my pairing, I would be devastated. Up until that montage the most physical contact they had had was hand holding. Now, I’ve heard the argument that GoT is just a more serious show that doesn’t focus on romance. And to that I say, SINCE WHEN?! Cersei and Jaime, as unhealthy as it is, have a love story that has driven the entire plot since literally episode 1. Tyrion’s love story with Shea was incredibly moving and progressed in a very small amount of screentime. Ned and Cat’s love was behind most, if not all, of her motivations right up until her death. Jon and Ygrit’s romance was beautifully developed, again, with very little screentime. Even Sam and Gilly’s relationship, two characters who have relatively low priority, have one of the best love stories in the show. These writers know how to build a proper ship, so the question is, why didn’t they do it for THE ship? I believe it’s because this tryst is nothing more than a plot device leading to the real showdown: a triangle of contention between Jon, Dany, and Sansa.

Jon loves a woman that doesn’t exist.

I’ve maintained this whole time that the only reason Jon is so infatuated with Dany is because he’s never seen the real Dany. In fact, all he knows about her is what he’s been told by her advisors who are so far up her ass they can’t see the Targaryen shaped axe hanging over their heads. In private they admit that she isn’t an ideal ruler, but her saving grace is that she listens to her advisors. But how long will that last? Tyrion, as smart as he is, is banking on his ability to cage a dragon, which makes Dany’s sentiments on the dragon pit very foreboding. She does not believe in putting dragons in cages. She believe it makes them weak and vulnerable. I believe that next season we will see her rattle the cage, and Jon will see it too. He’ll see her show her true colors and it will definitely affect the way he feels.

The incest will be an issue.

It’s honestly hard to say how Jon will react to the revelation of his true lineage. Obviously there will be instant revulsion and disgust with regards to his intimacy with his aunt, but would he be able to eventually look past that? Normally I would say no, but this show loves it’s incest. Also, in GRRM’s original outline Jon does fall for Arya, but the brief wording of the summary implies that it isn’t consummated until he knows for a fact they are cousins rather than half siblings. If we make the assumption that the character in the final draft was the same as the original then this would mean Jon has a serious hang up about incest and honestly aunt/nephew is possibly worse than half siblings. Now, on the other hand, it also means that Jon has the ability to overlook a brother/sister bond as long as they aren’t actually siblings. Of course, this takes major speculation, but it’s at least worth taking into account when considering Dany and Sansa are literally the only available females for the King in the North. On top of all this there’s the problem that Dany will immediately see Jon as a rival. Even if he refuses the throne she will never be a better candidate than him. The people of Westeros are resisting her dominion while Jon’s people practically forced him into power. When you add that he is the undisputed heir it makes perfect sense that the paranoia of the dragon would turn Dany against him. And a marriage would be off the table. No matter what she did he would always have all the power. He would be the rightful king, able to call in his birthright at any time. It’s too big a risk to let him stand next to the Iron Throne. Now that we know Bran plans on spilling the beans as soon as Jon walks through the door we can be sure that J0nerys is on a clock.

Sansa has very clear motivations that are sure to be aimed at Jon.

We finally saw in this episode who Sansa truly has become. She outwitted the master and executed yet another enemy. And her final words to him were as satisfying as they were revealing: Thank you for your many lessons. I will not forget them. This is clearly setting up a brand new character for season 8. This is the writer’s telling us that this Sansa is unpredictable. Her actions are no longer a reliable reflection of her thoughts, not just to the other characters but to us the viewers as well. Rewatching her scenes with Littlefinger is beautiful. She lets him lead her by the nose, only to lure him into revealing his true intentions so blatantly it’s actually laughable the Mockingbird didn’t see his demise coming. So how will this new willingness to manipulate and deceive affect her and Jon’s relationship? Well, the real issue will be Dany. No way in fuck they’re going to get along. The look on Sansa’s face when Baelish suggested Jon being attracted to Dany is one of pure horror. She knows what that would mean for her. Dany could easily squeeze her out as Jon’s chief advisor. Dany’s relationship with the King will threaten her position and I believe this new Sansa will fight back.

Sansa is likely capable of sleeping with a brother figure.

Aside from the obvious fact that manipulating your brother with your sexuality is a Cersei-approved strategy for maintaining power, I strongly believe that Sansa is completely detached from her sexuality. Her only experience with sex has been her fiance threatening to rape her on her wedding night and her husband... well, raping her on her wedding night. And then every night, for months. While being brutally beaten and cut. If female psychology in Westeros is anything like it is in the real world then Sansa’s history is the perfect storm for a woman with severe issues with her own sexuality. Specifically, women who are raped long term while in a committed relationship often become detached from the act. Instead of seeing it as emotional it’s seen as simply a bodily function. One that is expected to hurt very badly. This leads to things like masochism, associating hate and anger with sex, and hypersexuality. With a psyche this messed up it’s easy to see how a woman would want to reward the only man that’s ever protected her with sex, while also expressing her anger towards him in the only way she knows how.

What would Cersei do?

Next season we can predict one certainty: Jon, Dany, and Sansa are going to be cooped up in a cold castle for months, possibly years. Dany will be whispering in Jon’s ear and Sansa will likely clash with her on a personal level, which will push her to drive a wedge between the two. I think that if Sansa truly is now thinking like Cersei, then we have only to ask ourself how Cersei would react in such a situation. What would Cersei Lannister do if she stood beside a man who was being taken away from her influence by another woman? What would she do if she was a viable option for marriage as opposed to the other woman who can’t bare children and is inappropriately related? We all know the answer. If Sansa continues down the path she is on, you can bet the thought will occur to her too.

In conclusion...

My theory has adjusted a lot since the beginning of this season but I still have plenty of hope and you should too!! There is more than enough time to pull together a Jonsa plot in the final season. J0nerys isn’t being written like something that’s not going to matter in the end and will surely be over as soon as Jon learns his real name. Sansa will have every reason to dislike Dany and if Sansa takes inspiration from her teachers there’s only one way to deal with the situation. Because of her unfortunate history with sex she’s likely detached enough from her own sexuality to use it as a weapon.

The evidence is there guys. Don’t jump ship yet.

#jonsa #jon x sansa #jonsa meta #jon x sansa meta #starkcest #the case for jonsa #sansa stark #game of thrones spoilers

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mrmichaelchadler · 5 years

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Thumbnails 11/2/18

Thumbnails is a roundup of brief excerpts to introduce you to articles from other websites that we found interesting and exciting. We provide links to the original sources for you to read in their entirety.—Chaz Ebert

"CIFF 2018: 'The Hate U Give' and 'Widows' on the Red Carpet": My interviews with filmmakers Steve McQueen and George Tillman Jr., author Gillian Flynn and actors Viola Davis, Michelle Rodriguez and Amandla Stenberg at the Chicago International Film Festival, published at Indie Outlook.

“There’s no question Tillman Jr.’s film would make an essential double bill with Carlos López Estrada’s ‘Blindspotting,’ another powerful illustration of modern-day prejudice amplified shamelessly by our president. ‘What I want to illuminate for audiences is the importance of having empathy instead of sympathy, of having understanding as well as the ability to listen to each another,’ Tillman Jr. told me. ‘We must have the tough conversations provoked by this film, and I’m very excited for audiences to take it all in.’ Among the most potent truths illuminated by ‘The Hate U Give’ is the tendency for white people to mistake ‘color blindness’ as a form of acceptance. Having been open about her own sexuality in recent years, Stenberg told me that the importance of acknowledging one’s identity extends far beyond the realm of race. ‘Whether it’s your blackness, your gayness, your trans-ness or whatever it is, I think it is always so important to acknowledge the components of self that make us us,’ stressed Stenberg. ‘The premise of ‘I don’t see color’ is one that rests upon the idea that we live in a post-racial or post-identity society, which is not true. When we relate to one another and see, hear and regard each other, I think it’s really important to be inclusive of all the different facets of self that contribute to one’s own experience. You have to make sure that when you are seeing someone, you are seeing them not despite of who they are, but including and because of who they are.’”

"The Many Faces of Women Who Identify as Witches": Including Deborah Kampmeier, the exceptional filmmaker pictured above, in an article by The New Yorker's Naomi Fry. Catch the exhibit at NYC's ClampArt before it closes on November 24th.

“In her portrait series ‘Major Arcana: Witches in America,’ which will be shown at the ClampArt gallery, in Chelsea, beginning October 4th, the photographer Frances F. Denny seeks to explore the figure of the contemporary witch beyond the cultural chestnuts that have shrouded and obscured it. In the course of the past two years, Denny, who holds an M.F.A. in photography from the Rhode Island School of Design (where I taught her for a semester a number of years ago), has travelled in California, Louisiana, and along the East Coast, taking the portraits of dozens of women who identify as witches. Her subjects are of diverse age, social class, and ethnicity, and practice a range of rituals, often drawing on ‘mysticism, engagement with the occult, politically oriented activism, polytheism, ritualized ‘spell-work’ and plant-based healing,’ according to Denny’s exhibition notes. Among them are ‘self-proclaimed green witches, white witches, kitchen witches, hedge witches, and sex witches.’ The series as a whole aims to avoid easy formulas and, instead, to exhibit the heterogeneity and individuality of modern-day witches, Denny told me recently, adding, ‘I’m not pinning these women down.’”

"Fare Thee Well, Filmstruck": Our critic Monica Castillo eulogizes the irreplaceable streaming service in her latest Tiny Letter newsletter, which you can sign up for here.

“I don't need to tell you the news has been bad lately. But to lose a source of comfort in these trying times? It feels especially cruel, almost personally so. Last week, Time Warner pulled the plug on FilmStruck, the streaming service that offered treasures from the TCM vault and the Criterion Collection. As far as I know, there is no other streaming service that takes programming and extras so seriously. FilmStruck started the season after I began at The New York Times. It was exciting news to cover, and I felt especially attached to FilmStruck because of the timing. I picked movies from its collections after work to de-stress. Later, I came up with ideas on how to cover some new discovery I just HAD to write about. I cried my way through the early films of David Lean during a few rough patches, and I threw on old favorites like the movies of Peter O'Toole while doing chores to keep me company. FilmStruck proved the streaming world wasn't all bad news for classic movie fans, but that it could be a curated resource useful to diehard cinephiles and newcomers alike.”

"The Halloween Tree": Andrea Thompson revisits the 1993 animated gem at The Young Folks.

“Yes, Halloween has lasted, but everything mentioned above is mere window dressing. What has kept this holiday going is one of the universal truths of humanity which unites us all, and that is our fascination with fear and the individual horrors that shake us to our core. Few movies understand this, but the Emmy-winning 1993 TV movie ‘The Halloween Tree’ does. I discovered this little gem as a kid because I had the childhood most writers have, the kind with a nose fully inserted in a book. And the author of many such books was one of the great masters of sci-fi himself, Ray Bradbury, the author of the novel of the same name, as well as other books such as The Martian Chronicles, The Illustrated Man, and Fahrenheit 451. For the film adaptation, Bradbury actually penned the screenplay and serves as narrator, which means much of his poetic prose is preserved. The movie takes place on Halloween Night, and follows four preteen kids, Jenny, Ralph, Tom, and Wally, all costumed up as a witch, a mummy, a skeleton, and a monster respectively, and eager to join their best friend Pip. As ‘The Halloween Tree’ puts it, ‘Some say that on the day he was born, all the soda pop bottles in the world fizzed over. Pipkin, who could yell louder, sing better, and eat more popcorn. Pip, the greatest boy who ever lived.’”

"'Bohemian Rhapsody': A Disservice to Freddie Mercury": Solzy at the Movies critic Danielle Solzman eloquently explains why the hotly anticipated biopic is a missed opportunity.

“While the band’s popularity is the large focus of the film, it’s hard to discuss Freddie Mercury without knowing what we know about his sexuality. There were the rumors in the tabloids during the band’s heyday. The film doesn’t ignore it per se. There’s a montage of clips where Freddie and personal manager Paul Prenter walking into gay clubs. Even though we see him clearly hitting on guys, there’s not much outside of the relationship with Paul and even Jim Hutton (Aaron McCusker). This is it. Nothing to say of Freddie’s relationship with radio DJ Kenny Everett (Dickie Beau). There’s not even any sex scenes between them! I liken it to social media in that they’re only showing us what they want us to see. The biggest worry obviously has come true. It really does a disservice to the singer. When Freddie receives his AIDS diagnosis, the moment is not as emotional as it could be. This is a serious disease that killed many people. It led to his passing at the age of 45 years old on November 24, 1991. Here it is, the film misses an opportunity to have a bigger focus on his battle with the disease. To make matters worse, Freddie was diagnosed two years AFTER the Live Aid performance and yet as they rehearse for the gig, he opens up about his battle with AIDS! If you’re going to tell the story, tell it the right way.”

Image of the Day

Chicago's indispensable "cine-club," Filmfront, 1740 W. 18th St., is celebrating its first three-and-a-half years of free film and education programming with a fundraising party on Saturday, November 3rd. For more information on the event, visit Filmfront's official Facebook page. You can make a donation here and sign up for its monthly newsletter here. Also be sure to check out my article on Filmfront from 2016. Poster courtesy of Jacob Lindgren.

Video of the Day

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The streaming platform Kanopy recently teamed up with the Goethe-Institut to showcase 48 acclaimed German features on its streaming platform. View the complete list here.

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someonetotaketheedgeoff-blog · 6 years

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23.08.2018 - Journal: Chocolate Bavarians

I watched Brent go about his business in the convenience store while I smoked outside on the street corner. The Asian women behind the counter gave me her usual neutral nod from behind the counter. Brent’s signature full-bodied energy boomed throughout the store, asking the women how her day was while he opened a fridge. He’d told me earlier he was getting essentials like bread and milk but I saw him place a chocolate bavarian on the counter as well as packet of skittles. He paid, scooped the bag from the counter and walked out of the store.

‘Did you just buy a bavarian?’

‘What?’ He said looking away trying to hide his smile. ‘… Yeah … Yeah… I did’

‘Jesus Christ… It’s only 10:30’

I’d always tease him for his super indulgent purchases like HSP’s the size of briefcases or ice cream made from a type of confectionery you wouldn't expect to make ice cream. But I’d always end up eating it with him 8 hours later, sitting on the couch, watching garbage on the television as bad as the food. He always shared his shit. Usually quite aggressively, offering Tim-Tam’s by throwing them across the room, forcing me to catch them. I’d say ‘no thanks’ and place the unwanted Tim-Tam’s on the torn green leather couch he’d found on the side of the road. ‘Come on… You know you want it’ he’d say. I’d say ‘no’. He’d say ‘come on’. And eventually I’d eat it.

Occasionally I’d see James. Sometimes from outside the flat. Sometimes from inside the flat. Occasionally eating, wearing his puffer jacket and looking into space. Which doesn’t sound that strange. But it was the way he looked into space was notable. Sometimes it looked like he was seeing the entire universe in a fast forwarded time lapse yet his eyes and body language indicated it didn’t phase him, like he could take it or leave it. Other times it looked like his soul was dead. Looking into space the same way an ancient old man sitting in a nursing home might gaze at a television. It was certainly worth noting. Brent and I talked about it occasionally.

‘Dude… dude… look…’. I whispered, leaning forward on the manila folder coloured outdoor chair, gesturing inside to the kitchen.

We both looked to see James standing still, looking out the kitchen window. He stood with such calmness or possibly deadness doing nothing, uninterrupted for at least 20 seconds. We’d begin to feel strange watching, then we looked away.

***

I walked up the door girl. The need to piss helped me to act sober. I pinched the tip of my tongue with my teeth. She looked vaguely at a clip board. She told me the entry price. I asked if a $50 note was too big. It wasn’t too big. I walked up the stairs. Paid the entry. Walked through a door with a circular window into the club.

I saw the others at the bar but my need to piss was so powerful I didn’t even feel like communicating. But after looking around for a moment and nearly walking into the kitchen I asked them. They told me.

2 vodka Redbulls were the same price as a pouch of rolling tobacco. I wanted to buy drugs. A terrible idea but I couldn’t see myself generating a sociable demeanour drinking scooners of Furphy for $10.50. I looked around the smokers area. It was too bohemian. Too many crossed legged people throwing their heads back to exhale smoke and reveal their no longer edgy septum piercings. I was too much of a beginner to be trying to find drugs in this type of environment, this was a few levels above and not the kind of place that people would self-advertise.

***

Later on I remember being in the main dance floor. I danced or what I thought was dancing while I held my eyes shut. I had to keep them shut. I couldn’t really work it out. Having them open felt like they were being squashed and pummelled by the lights. There weren’t even many lights. It was the darkest bar I’d ever been too. But I kept them closed and swayed from side to side.

After a while I realised I’d been watching a circular bunch of orange colour swirls around on a near black background. I watched it for awhile not noticing I didn’t seem to have a body any more. There was a lot going on, a few other swirls of different colours swirled off to the side. Someone brushed my body in the real world and I opened my eyes. I briefly considered the experience to be a bit weird but quickly went back to dancing. It can be a real problem when you can’t even escape your own visual reality by closing your eyes.

***

I kept looking at the sand hoping to see the drink bottle. But I couldn’t see it anywhere. I tried to distract myself. I tried to not look at my phone. I started worrying about everything. I began internally abusing myself. After a bit of that I’d look back at the sand.

I looked out at the sea to try and generate some kind of transcendental feeling. I scanned across but was disappointed to notice you could easily see the shores on the other side however there was one gap. That’s what I wanted. That’s where the good shit is. I don’t know why. That’s where you generate the good transcendental vibes.

I looked through the gap at the sea with nothing on the horizon. I was trying really hard to have a spiritual moment but my throat was sore and my nose ran. I kept looking though. What the fuck was I looking or hoping for I wondered.

Sitting in the car I started to worry about something pointless. We drove past a massive outdoor/camping store. I envisioned getting a job there. I imagined not hating it. I imagined enjoying it. I toyed with having a completely different life and mindset where I loved working there. Where for reason there emited and endless drive to help people buy the perfect tent. I imagined never feeling tired in my body. No aching and no headaches. I wouldn’t be the joking type but I wouldn’t be too serious. I imagined I’d have a bit of a fringe that curled a bit to the side. I imagined getting out of my car in the car park with one of those sort of lanyed key chain drawstring necklace type thing that I’d roll tight over right index finger flicking it back and fourth in a circular motion as I walked across the concrete ground. I’d be freshly shaven but I wouldn't itch or have blemishes on my skin. I’d work fulltime hours. I’d indulge in things at home like television and feel like I’d earned it. Occasionally I’d play a brief game of FIFA or tag someone in a funny meme.

There’s was almost no one on the beach.

On the way back I looked across the water. A green field stretched over like a dashboard. I was envious. I always feel envious when I see stretches of nature from a distance and it doesn’t look like there’s many people around. I imagine walking to get there on my own.

***

Every day I wake up the same. I sleep in. Snooze for as long as possible. Currently I’ve been getting up in the evening. Sometimes as late as 5pm. I missed a shift on Sunday I didn’t know about. I haven’t been to work in 5 days.

I work in a warehouse washing plates and glasses. It makes me insane. At work I listen to Bill Burr’s podcast and lose my entire mind. At the end of shifts I walk out into the car park with my teeth clenching and Bill Burr’s voice sounds unhuman.

My wrists are sore. Particularity the left one. The job doesn’t pay me properly. They underpay me and having minimal motivation to do almost anything I neglected to deal with it. Then I idiotically hope it’ll sort itself out, turning up to work, secretly resenting my co-workers until one evening I was polishing glasses, my legs aching like the legs of an old dinning room chair when I decided to have the 2nd or 3rd cigarette of the hour (who knows). I knew people were upstairs in the office but no one had come down in a long time. Occasionally I’d look up at the ceiling while polishing glass number 678 and look for cameras. There were no cameras.

So I thought ‘fuck it’, rolled a cigarette and opened the door to the car park. I watched a black guy with his pants down to his knees receive a blow job from the silhouette of a girl. He was leant over in a strange position as if doing awkward push ups on the bench in the centre of the car park. I watched as he gently edged the silhouette of his cock into the girls mouth like it was a camp site puppet show. I looked at all of this for 1.25 seconds with the cigarette dangling in my mouth. My heart started pounding real fast. I locked eyes with the guy. My eyes swirled and flickered, like two dirty share-house microwaves set side by side in the rain, one cooking a potato wrapped in tin foil, the other one cooking a laptop that played a montage of all the ‘public’ porn I’d ever watched. I turned to the right, walking along the side of the other warehouses, then around the corner. I lit the cigarette and breathed/whispered to myself - ‘What the fuck?!’.

I waited a minute and then as slowly as possible tried to peek around the corner. As soon as I saw anything I pulled my head back. Don’t know why. In that moment I didn’t care about seeing the blow job any more. I mean sure, we probably all think we’d like to see some live sex act in a car park performed by strangers in the moon light, but do you want to watch it for longer than a few seconds? Maybe it’s my attention span. It’s so poor I even skip through porn compilations now.

I finished smoking, rustled up some courage and walked around the corner like I was leaving the house during a rainstorm. They were finished. The guy was walking away, very slowly, looking very relaxed. The girl wandered slowly behind him scrolling on her phone not facing me. As I walked up to the door he saw me again.

‘Hey man!’. He said, grinning.

‘Hey dude…’. I said nervously. ‘… Sorry’. I added.

‘Aaaaahahaha’. He laughed as he turned around.

I went through the door to the warehouse and shut it behind me.

I felt shaken up. Which’s weird knowing all the fucked up shit I’ve seen on the internet. I guess everything’s more visceral live. It was almost a real Bukowski moment! I was excited but also sad that I found it exciting.

A girl from the office clopped down the stairs in her medium high heels and made some comment about me still being there or something about it being dark. I squeezed out my last morsel of social energy and said something forgettable. She hovered around the door while more filler conversation happened.

‘Um… I know we don’t know each other very well… but ah… can I tell you something?’. I stubbled out like a less cute, D-grade Hugh Grant with ADD, absent mindedly trying to remember the last time he’d called his Mum.

‘Ah… Yeah...? Sure?’. She replied with politely repressed apprehension.

‘Well… I… you know the car park courtyard thing?… Just… well… I… ah… I don’t… I’m trying to gauge your sensitivity… I… um…’. I said.

‘Aw dude you can say whatever you want to me, it’s fine’. She laughed, stretching her face outwardly like pizza doe with make up on, revealing a missing tooth in the back of her mouth. Her face then settled and I felt a bit of her warmth and realised she seemed quite sweet. I started feeling mean about my general resentment. I told her what I’d just seen. She very much enjoyed the story. We laughed by a big green garbage bin as we smoked. I ran the story into the ground and then she asked me what I did. I talked about stand-up and she talked about Hughesy. I tried to swing the conversation back to comedy. I talked about how brutal stand-up is. At the end of the conversation I mentioned I’d been underpaid. She said she’d help me out. I said goodbye and walked home.

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jakobfazio-blog · 7 years

Conversation

Screenplay Adaptation of the song We Didn't start the Fire by Billy Joel:

The Fire:

1 BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION 1

BILLY JOEL’S HOUSE - DAY PANNING SHOT

It is a Saturday Afternoon in New York 1989. Billy Joel has invited some of his friends and family to celebrate his 40th Birthday.

PANNING SHOT CONTINUED INTO BILLY JOEL’S PERSONAL RECORDING STUDIO

Joel has invited a couple of people into his recording studio per their request. A man named Sam leans over towards Joel and tries to start a conversation with him.

SAM FISHER It’s terrible isn’t it...

BILLY JOEL

(Laughs nervously)

Sorry.... who might you be?

SAM FISHER

So sorry, forgot my manners.... My name’s Sam... I’m a friend of Sean’s. (Points to Sean)

BILLY JOEL

(Acknowledges Sam)

Nice to meet you then Sam....so go on tell me, what’s terrible?

SAM FISHER

Well I’ve recently turned 21 and I’ve noticed just how terrible a time it is to be it.

BILLY JOEL

Yeah, I remember when I was 21, I thought it was an awful time and we had Vietnam, and y’know, drug problems, and civil rights problems and everything seemed to be awful.

SAM FISHER Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it’s different for you. You were a kid in the fifties and

CONTINUED: 2.

(CONTINUED)

everybody knows that nothing happened in the fifties.

Joel shuffles back in his chair and adopts a retorted tone.

BILLY JOEL

Wait a minute, didn’t you hear of the Korean War or the Suez Canal Crisis?

SAM FISHER

The only thing I know for certain is that the era of Baby Boomers has changed this world for the worse. They started a fire that, till this day has not yet been extinguished.

Billy gets out of his chair in a major rage that lets the others in the studio acknowledge his frustration.

BILLY JOEL

(In a furious tone)

You do know that I am a part of that era that you criticise.... Who the fuck do you think I am? Who’s house are you in right now?

SAM FISHER

.... I ugh never meant to offend you Mr. Joel I just...

BILLY JOEL

Yeah alright... I don’t want to hear your excuses, just get the fuck out, parties over... everyone get out. This is not a joke, I want you all out of my home.

WIDE SHOT OF ALL OF HIS GUESTS LEAVING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE

THAN A WIDE SHOT OF HIS GUESTS DRIVING AWAY FROM OUTSIDE THE HOUSE.

TRANSITION TO NIGHT TIME AT BILLY JOEL’S HOUSE

2 THE TWO WOMEN 2

Billy Joel’s sister, Judith arrives out the household to check up on Billy but is met with his wife Christie.

CONTINUED: 3.

(CONTINUED)

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY

Oh... come in Judith, I’m guessing you’re here for Billy?

JUDITH JOEL

Yes, is he doing alright?

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY (Disheartened tone)Listen, I couldn’t tell you if I wanted too.

JUDITH JOEL

(Acknowledges Christie’s concern) Let me talk to him, where is he?

Christie lights a cigarette

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY

(sigh) He’s where he always is.

TRANSITION TO BILLY’S STUDIO

3 BILLY’S STUDIO 3

Judith enters the studio with no response from Billy.

JUDITH JOEL

(Melancholy tone)

What’s wrong Billy? C’mon you can tell me... (Shocked) Billy what is that?

BILLY JOEL

Oh come on Judith, you know I do this shit.

Judith picks up a syringe on the table in front of Billy before it’s been used.

BILLY JOEL

You know I come in here to think... I come in here to gather my thoughts...I come in here to get away from it all.

JUDITH JOEL

Well sometimes Billy you have to make exceptions. I came here and

CONTINUED: 4.

(CONTINUED)

I’m sure as hell not leaving without an explanation.

Judith holds up the syringe.

And how is this going to help you think anyway?

BILLY JOEL

(smirks and avoids the question) It was one of Sean’s friends...some guy named Scott or something. He mentioned something about our generation... He said that we have caused this world to become sickening for new generations. I can’t help but wonder if that’s what the younger generation truly think of us.

JUDITH JOEL

You know he’s wrong yeah?

BILLY JOEL

Shit Judith of course he’s wrong, but how do I prove it.

JUDITH JOEL

Tell me what is your job again...what are you good at?... This shit is messing with you... you need to get help. (referring to the syringe)

Judith closes the studio door in mild frustration to leave him to his thoughts.

Billy grabs a pen and paper and writes down the words 1949 and Harry Truman.

Brief montage of flashbacks of Billy as a kid and how he learnt/was affected by some of the events listed in his song both as a kid and an adult.

TRANSITION TO THE MORNING

4 MORNING BREAKFAST 4

SHOT OF THE KITCHEN WITH THE SUN COVERING IT

Christie is making breakfast (eggs and toast) when Billy walks in on her.

CONTINUED: 5.

(CONTINUED)

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY Didn’t catch you last night... everything ok?

BILLY JOEL

Actually yes... I believe I’ve solved my problem.

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY (Smiles) Well than care to join me for breakfast?

BILLY JOEL

I would love too, but you know that when I’m working I have my meals in the studio.

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY (Initially saddened but than optimistic) Well at least let me see what you’ve done so far.

Billy brings in what he has wrote and shows Christie

BILLY JOEL

It’s history all the way from my year of birth to right now. I’ve put together all the major events, concepts and personalities I can think of to make the song.

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY (worried tone)

How is listing historical

context going to become

successful? Sorry....but I just

don’t understand the relevance

this has to today.

(More)

CONTINUED: 6.

BILLY JOEL

It’s not just about history.... it’s about what we can learn from history. I’m trying to prove a point.... yesterday some guy brought up that it was our generation that has caused for such crazy times. I disagreed... and this is how I prove it.

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY

(blank face)

BILLY JOEL

Alright look it shows that there has been significant people and events from the day that I was born till this very day.... It shows that we didn’t start the fire because events like this have been around forever and will continue to occur forever. The point is to show how any time period can be a crazy era to live in and that it wasn’t our generation that kicked it off.

End Scene

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amnportfolio · 7 years

Text

Shopping with Mom - Memoir

At first, the video is unintelligible, rendered grainy from the years.

But then, the film focuses on a door and the nymph-like singing of a child can be heard. A strikingly pale hand presses against the grey wood of the door, and once again the camera has to refocus. Now, a white tile bathroom with seashell pink walls comes into view. I’m sitting in the tub, four years old, swaddled with nothing but baby fat like a child in the Garden of Eden. My tiny voice swells and fills the bathroom with a shameless yet gentle melody. My grandma always told me that babies only sing when they’re happy, so I’m assuming in that moment, I am happy, content with the thin, warm water of the bathtub and the presence of my mother. I still retain an affinity for bathtubs.

The woman holding the camera giggles. “What are you doing?” She asks. Her voice is deep and instrumental. It’s clear she adores me, her only daughter. In my infantile eyes, my mother is life giving goddess, a Platonic form of beauty. I smile up at my mother, dimples creasing the edges of my mouth. The same dimples dapple the outskirts of her lips, too.

“I wrote a song, mommy.”

“What’s it about, baby?”

I laugh, a high-pitched reflection of my mother’s own laugh, the kind of laugh you only hear before the complexities of adulthood put their hands around a child’s throat. “I don’t know.”

My mom turns the camera on herself, now sitting on the edge of the bath tub. The camera refocuses on a moony face with warm brown eyes and cropped red ochre hair. It is apparent that my green eyes must have come from my dad, but everything is else is wrought from the chromosomes of this woman. My mom looks at the camera lens, her pupils darting from side to side, trying to figure out where to look. We always teased her about being bad with technology.

“My baby wrote a song,” she asserts with a quiet pride.

This tape is all I have of Mom before the walker and the pain pills and blood tests and Lupus. Always the Lupus.

***

“Ok, Mom. One foot at a time.”

I take my mom’s leggings in my hands and gently roll them up, so that they go on faster when she puts her atrophied legs in. Gingerly, I take the first foot and place it in the bunched up hole of the legging, and smooth the fabric across her soft, creamy calf. I follow the same delicate operation for the second foot, and look up at her face when I’m done.

“Ready?” I ask.

She shuts her eyes tightly. They are almond shaped and slope downward innocently, like mine.

In one quick, haggard movement, she shoots up off the edge of the bed onto her feet, with help from her walker, so that I can pull her leggings up all the way. A grunt laced with pain and effort escapes her translucent lips, and she crash lands back onto her bed.

“Ok. Ok. You did it,” I murmur, brushing some lint off her knee. “You’re dressed.”

“Thanks baby,” Mom begins, and then tacks an “I’m sorry” onto it discreetly. She is always apologizing for being my mom. While I can understand this sentiment, there is nothing to be sorry for. Despite her severe Lupus and all the consequent health problems, she is a good mom. Always has been.

“Alright. I’m going to work. I got my cell on me at all times. Dad’s taking a nap on the couch.” I brief my mom as I open the window blinds beside her big, four-poster bed. Silvery slivers of sunlight shoot into the room, illuminating all the oak furniture and the shag carpet and the dated floral patterns. We moved into this house fourteen years ago, so it’s a different house than the one in the video. I never liked it. It’s a big house in a nice American neighborhood, the kind that the wind blows right through without being warmed first.

“Sounds good hun. Have a good day.” My mom settles back into her pillows. I lean down and plant a kiss on her forehead, careful not to lean on her too hard. I’m afraid of breaking her.

My workplace is a hot pink, sparkly gumball of a world. I’m a part-time key holder for Charlotte Russe, a young women’s clothing store. All my coworkers are also women, so sometimes over the summers, I forget men actually exist.

We do things like bring each other waffle fries from Chik Fil A on our breaks and give each other discounts we aren’t supposed to give. We sarcastically dance to the cheap pop music corporate makes us play, and the giggles of girls line the merchandise fabric like rhinestones.

As much as I like my work, the constant montage of moms and daughters shopping together reminds me of something I’m missing.

I see girls running out of the dressing rooms in half naked ecstasy to show their mom an outfit, and I can’t relate. I see girls asking their moms for advice on color coordination and nothing in my brain pings in response.

You see, I can’t remember the last time I went shopping with my mom. It’s such a petty, suburban detail, I know, but you don’t realise how much the little things count in a relationship until you can’t have them.

***

The first Spring Formal dress I bought, I bought alone. I bought it the spring that my mom was in the hospital (again) with pneumonia. It was the spring the dog died, and not soon after the floods came and washed out the wildflowers on the side of the road, and the road with them. Houston forgot how to swim. It was the spring I forgot how much my body was worth and slept with a boy I really shouldn’t have slept with; so it was also the spring of my almost baby, and crying in a nail salon bathroom.

Though it was a beautiful dress, it was a dark one, more suited for fall than spring. The bodice was a nude tan with muted rhinestones peppering it, and it was slightly too big— gravity and my ribcage fought for supremacy. However, I could endure the suffering and the constant bust checks for the sheer beauty of the dress. The full length, ballroom tulle skirt was tar black. Add a couple stars, and it could have been mistaken for the night sky.

For that Formal, I got ready at my friend’s house. I remember sitting on the stairs in my dress as her mom took pictures with her, smiling boisterous pearly smiles into the camera lens. I could almost see the camera flashes bouncing off their teeth. Her mom told her in melodic tones how beautiful she looked in her purple mermaid dress. A thick ball of an emotion I could not quite name formed in my chest, on top of my heart, and it sat there all during the Spring Formal. It was there when I danced with my friends and when I drove my friend home that night across town, the highway unraveling under my swollen feet. It was there when I arrived home at 2am and nobody was awake to greet me.

I sent my mom a few selfies of the dress in a mirror at the dance, but the hospital always had had bad reception.

The first and only time Mom saw my dress was on a hanger a few months later. She looked at it with an expression like flat soda in her eyes. She ran the tulle between her finger tips lightly, considerately.

“It’s lovely, Lexy. Really,” she said her wind chime voice. She didn’t say it, but we could both feel the “I’m Sorry” hanging thick in the air.

***

“Shit. I just remembered something.”

“What is it Lex?”

“The Spring Formal is next weekend. I still need a dress.”

“Why can’t you wear the one you wore last year?”

I shake my head. “It’s too big now, Mom. I’m gonna have to go today to get a dress.”

I look over at my mom. We are cuddled into her bed the day before Easter, an expanse of half eaten Cadbury bunnies and crème filled eggs spread before us. Her eyes are getting dewy clear and red.

“Oh God, Mom. What’s wrong? Please don’t cry.” At the sight of my mother getting choked up, I feel a wad of tears in my throat as well. It’s a universal, primitive instinct, the urge to cry at the sight of one’s mother crying.

“Dammit. I wanted to go with you this year.” Her voice cracks a bit, coated with a mixture of frustration and sorrow.

“Relax. What about next year?”

“Next year I’ll still be sick, baby.”

Unable to respond, I walk to her side of the bed and wrap my arms around her small nymph body. I have to be careful not to step on one of the Ziploc bags of pills on the ground. We remain like that for a bit, twisted into each other like wisteria plants. The TV murmurs with “Say Yes to The Dress” in the background. I want to reach in between the static and crawl away, my mom in hand.

“Listen. I’ll send you a picture of all the dresses, ok?” I know this offer isn’t much, but my brain is wired for problem solving like my father, and this is the best I can come up with.

Surprisingly, Mom brightens up at this idea.

“Deal.”

At the mall, I try four different stores and countless dresses. I film myself dancing around the dressing room in all of them, and my mom responds with her varying, unapologetic opinions. The other moms and daughters look on in confusion, wondering what the hell I’m doing, and why I’m alone. The moms help their daughters carry the heavy dresses and are convinced of their child’s exceptionality. I am alone to haul my own dresses back and forth from the sales floor to the changing room. By myself, it is a daunting and tiring task to wriggle in and out of the dresses, but my mom’s digital voice urges me on. I can almost see the invisible thread tying us together suspended above the dressing rooms, and reaching across town and over all the heads of the other moms and daughters.

After two hours of this, I narrow things down to two dresses. One is relatively reminiscent of the dress I picked last year; strapless, with a muted peach bodice and dusky ballroom skirt. But the other one is so strikingly different from anything I’d usually pick.

It, too, is a full length ball gown, but instead of polite, quiet colours, it’s awash with vivid spring magentas and oranges. Water colour flowers flit about on a silvery satin ocean. It’s an open back with a crisscross. If I wanted to be buried in my past dress, I wanted to live in this one.

My mom and I are sold.

“THAT’S THE ONE” she texts in all caps.

Before racing to the checkout, however, I check the price tag and realize it’s egregiously off budget. I sink back into the changing room bench. In the next dressing room over, I hear a mom helping her daughter shuffle into a dress. At first they spar at one another in shrill voices, but once the dress is on, silence pervades the dressing room.

“Oh, wow.” Her mom finally sighs. “You’re so beautiful.”

I can’t hear the girl blushing, but I can feel it.

I sigh and reluctantly call my dad, the budget setter.

“I think mom and I found a dress we like.”

“Oh great! Are you gonna be home in a bit?” His burly Caribbean accent fills my ear.

“Well, the dress is a little bit more than we expected. Like 80 dollars more.”

My dad makes a sharp sound by blowing air through his teeth.

“Lex, are there any other ones—“

He is cut off by an assertive yell in the background.

“Well, you just got lucky. Your mother chimed in. She’ll pay the extra 80.”

I jump up off the dressing room bench.

“Really?”

“Yup. Hurry home. I just made dinner.”

“Oh. Ok. Thanks Dad. Tell Mom I said thanks.”

He lets out a broad chuckle. “You’re welcome. See you in a bit.”

When I get home, it is my turn to be exceptional. My mom and I coo over the dress, and I jump up and down on my side of her bed and dance around the dusty oak bed posts, hot pink hibiscus flowers bouncing victoriously on my hip bones. I think I hear every synonym for “beautiful” that night. In the shiny dress before my mom, I am rendered a bright creature, lit from within like a floral Christmas light. She just smiles and smiles and the bedroom fades into a warm whirlpool of laughter and lamp light.

Suddenly I don’t care about the dressing rooms or the other girls or the Lupus.

***

I still dream about being able to go shopping with my mom. By this, I mean that the walker and the pills melt away, and my mom rises from the bed. By this, I mean that I imagine the Lupus gene switched off, allowing us to be just a mom and her daughter.

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fathersonholygore · 7 years

Text

AMC’s The Walking Dead Season 7, Episode 11: “Hostiles and Calamities” Directed by Kari Skogland Written by David Leslie Johnson

* For a recap & review of the previous episode, “New Best Friends” – click here * For a recap & review of the next episode, “Say Yes” – click here Things at the Saviors compound are looking grim for Dwight (Austin Amelio). After discovering Daryl gone, the others arrive back with their spoils, including Eugene (Josh McDermitt). Negan (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) greets his new guest with a smile, and Lucille. But what about when Negan finds out one of his captives is missing? Won’t be happy. And someone’s always got to pay. In the meantime, Eugene comes to find he isn’t being killed. Rather he’s given a room, treated fairly well, given a bit of lunch after going through options of food which surprise him. They’ve even got kettle cooked potato chips. The fridge is stocked. Is the weakness in Eugene going to be a problem? Will he succumb to the temptations of this new life and not want to go back to Alexandria? Oh, and Dwight, he’s already feeling the wrath of Negan, as a handful of Saviors storm his room and beat him hard. Shit. Not that we didn’t see it coming. Dwight’s been put in the same room where he put Daryl, one where he’s been before himself. Negan isn’t happy about he and his Saviors looking from “tip to taint” and he’s definitely not happy about one of his wives – Sherry (Christine Evangelista) – having left not long after Daryl. Not happy at all. So now it’s a case of whether Dwight will go find Sherry. If he’ll try and repair the damage between him and his leader. Personally, I hope to see him change, after all the brutality on his part, as well as the brutality he’s seen from others; most specifically from Negan. It’d be one of the biggest redemption songs of the series. One thing we know for certain is, despite all that has happened Dwight does love Sherry, he never stopped. Negan: “Who are you, Dwight?” Dwight: “I‘m Negan” Rough and tumble Laura (Lindsley Register) shows Eugene around the compound. He’s still a bit sheepish, always will be. Soon, he’s brought to Negan. Sweet, sweet Eugene and his jar of pickles! He’s terrified. And who wouldn’t be, honestly? The I’M NEGAN chants. Lucille; know what she can do. Eugene hauls out his old story of being a doctor, et cetera, and for once it’s used well instead of deceiving people who actually wanted to help him. Thus begins survival mode in the hands of the Saviors, as he talks more confident by the minute; the name of this episode comes from his brief explanation. The slope gets even more slippery when Negan, as a token of appreciation, offers to send over a couple of his wives for dinner and conversation later. Sadly, this makes Eugene happier than it ought to, being in the hands of the man who killed his best friend Abraham. Negan: “Look at you, Dr. Smarty Pants.”

Eugene has a nice night with the ladies, without temptations of the flesh. The women are great fun, too. Witty, smart. They want to know more about his supposed involvement with the Human Genome Project, and he obliges with a bit of tough nerdy talk. He shows off a bit whipping up a bit of helium, doing a neat science fair-like experiment for the wives. What we see further is his getting comfortable with living there. Each scene with him is like a figurative and literal slipping away from his place in Alexandria. On the road, Dwight searches for Sherry. But what about when he does find her? What happens then? He goes to a house where there lies a picture of them on the floor. Memories everywhere amongst the empty cupboards. And an old note written by Sherry, one he compares to the note left for Daryl at the compound. In another room, a letter explaining what she did: “I let Daryl go because he reminded you of who you used to be, and I wanted to let you forget.” She also tells her husband that being dead would be better than being at that compound, under Negan’s thumb, hoping Dwight will someday get away from him and all the horror. Back at the compound, Dwight lies saying he found his wife, killed her after she ran into a pack of zombies. There are other things afoot. The women want help from Eugene, to help their friend Amber. She wants to end her life, the only mercy left. And tragically, it’s one of the best options in an awful world. She is going to die, one way or another. So Eugene agrees reluctantly to provide a relatively pain free suicide for the girl. Nice little montage of him doing his thing to “Everything Right is Wrong Again” by They Might Be Giants.

Punishment is being handed down at the altar of Negan. The man with the bat offers a show for Eugene. The doctor’s been framed by Dwight, to make him look in cahoots with Sherry for all the mess with Daryl. Nothing good for the doc is coming. Love how the scene is framed with Negan and the doctor in the background, just out of focus, as we’re focused on Dwight’s face, grimly bearing the fruits of his shitty machinations. Afterwards, the iron piping hot, Negan gets a false confession. That ain’t good enough, though. Not for a demonstration with Dr. Eugene in their company. He decides on tossing the doc straight into the furnace for everyone to witness. Watching Dwight play the part of humble servant, good dog, is crushing. He may have not killed his wife. He still just let a man get burned to death. Eugene figures out that the women want to kill Negan, the pills aren’t for Amber. They threaten telling the leader of his involvement if he doesn’t give over the pills. Except Eugene knows he has a place in the ranks, he isn’t replaceable; so far as Negan knows. One of the women tells Eugene he’s a coward. And he already knows that well enough. He’s content to hang around, eat pickles. Before a knock comes at his door. It’s the bad man and Lucille. Popping by for a chat. He wants to know who Eugene is – before he gets it out of his mouth, the crying fool replies: “I‘m Negan.” Next day he’s out surveying a bit of work with the caged zombies. Hypnotised by Negan. Is he playing the part, or is Eugene genuinely falling into life with Negan and the Saviors?

A solid episode I didn’t expect to love. Eugene’s not exactly a favourite of mine, though it’s changing now. This episode was an interesting look at his character, which in turn provided a couple unique perspectives into the Saviors’ compound, life under Lucille, so on. Can’t wait for “Say Yes” next. The Walking Dead – Season 7, Episode 11: “Hostiles and Calamities” AMC's The Walking Dead Season 7, Episode 11: "Hostiles and Calamities" Directed by Kari Skogland…

#Austin Amelio #Jeffrey Dean Morgan #Josh McDermitt #Negan #The Saviors #The Walking Dead #They Might Be Giants #Zombies

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randomrichards · 7 years

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BEST ANIMATED SHORTS: – BLIND VAYSHA And so, we start with the first Canadian import. Vaysha was born with two sights. With her left eye, she sees the past. With her right eye, she sees the future. Everyone she meets is both a child and an elder, which proves a problem when suitors try to court her. This creates a sense of blindness for Vaysha, walking into trees because she can only see it as a seedling and a stump. Her double vision also makes it hard to sleep when her dreams consists of both the dawn of man and the apocalypse. It’s up to 3 medicine women to bring her eyes into the present. This must be a horrifying way to live. Vaysha’s unable to live in the present, seeing only what was and what will be. It gets so unbearable that Vaysha considers gouging one of her eyes out. Too bad each eye presents its own problems. If she takes out her left eye, she sees only a bleak world. If she takes out her right eye, it’s going to be awkward to see her parents as infants. Either way, she’s still not living in the present. The animation takes on the style of an old wood cut art style, fitting with the folk tale storytelling. You get lots of beautiful images, including the scene of a caterpillar becoming a butterfly. The animation also exaggerates movements, especially with character’s stretching their necks. Adding to the folksy tale is the narration by Caroline Dhavernas. In a way, this feels like a folk tale, the kind cultures would tell to teach children a lesson. This lesson: “Today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” It sure gets the message across with its excellent animation. – BORROWED TIME Here’s the first of two Pixar shorts in this year’s category. It wasn’t shown before any feature length films, probably for good reason. This is the darkest short Pixar has ever done, and probably not suitable for kids. A weathered old sheriff returns to a top of a canyon to confront a traumatic memory. In his childhood, he and his father chased some bandits on a bandwagon when he fell off, causing a chain reaction that led to his father trapped on the edge of the cliff. With each step, the sheriff confronts a terrible instance of this accident. It cultivates in a shocking and fatal accident. This sheriff has lived with the guilt his whole life, and now he’s stands over the edge of the cliff. Pixar always deliver brings us superb short films thanks to their stunning animation and articulate storytelling. Never have they done a short film as adult as this. Directors Andrew Coats and Lou Hamou-Lhadj bring up themes of survivor’s guilt and grief over the course of 7 short minutes. The flashback scenes are fast paced and gripping, each one bringing more sense of dread. It all ends in a shocking moment that would scar anyone. You’ll never forget this short tale of tragedy and forgiveness. You can watch the short film on Vimeo. – PEAR CIDER AND CIGARETTES Another great Canadian short, this one a gritty character study of a hard living, self-destructive friend. Writer/Director Robert Valley recalls his friendship with Techno Styles. In high school, Techno was a star athlete who seemed to be the fastest and strongest person in school. The only thing Rob could do better than Techno is draw, which they bond over. Techno was the type of person who would skateboard through traffic or dive from atop a cliff, which makes him a legend among his peers. But his daredevil antics caught up with him via a car accident, changing his life forever. In Valley’s own words, “Techno seems to be a guy both completely out of control and completely in control at the same time.” From what we can see, he’s either very lucky or very unlucky. The accident left him with a permanent limp and an addiction to pain killers. On the other hand, he manage to win millions of dollars in a couple of lawsuits, allowing him to live the high life. But one of the lawsuits came from a malpractice that left him looking like a Simpsons character. And then there’s his alcoholic and drug addiction. Techno doesn’t reenter Robert’s life until he gets a phone call from Techno’s father. Turns out Techno is in China waiting for a liver transplant and his father has Rob travel across the continent to bring him home. This begins a frustrating process where Robert tries to get Techno to stop drinking long enough to get his surgery. A character designer, Valley brings on his trademark sharp, elongated animation style he used for Gorillaz and Aeon Flux. This style is perfect for Techno, whose scrawny demeanor emphasizes his ailing health. Valley also incorporates a film noir style for the environments, showing characters in silhouette in front of neon lights. Thus, he gives us some stunning images, including a montage of Techno driving into darkness, each time wearing a different heavy metal logo on his t-shirt. Valley also narrates the story with a rough, whiskey voice that fits perfectly with the noir style. Pearl Cider and Cigarettes is the cinematic equivalent to a glass of whiskey. Through Techno, Valley reveals the complications of being friends with a self-destructive addict. You can watch this short on Vimeo. – PEARL Ladies and Gentlemen, we have our first Oscar Nominated short film to incorporate 360 VR. We travel through the life of a guitarist, his daughter Sara, and their car. They start out living happily on the road, with the dad earning money through concerts and busking. He’s living the dream. But after a long time on the road, he switches to a conventional suburban life for his daughter’s sake. Then the film switches to a teenage Sara, who returns to the road with some friends on their own journey to stardom. The film takes place completely inside the car, telling the story through a montage of life events set to Alexis Harte’s “No Wrong Way Home.” Though only lasting a few seconds, each moment is a beautiful and recognizable piece of everyday life. With little dialogue, director Patrick Osborne[1]’s able to tell a brief story in seconds. One perfect example is one Christmas on the road, when the Guitarist looks at a family home and his face shows his concern about how he’s raising his daughter. In the next shot, we see him in a collar shirt and tie moving into the house. As I’ve said, this animated short was shot with VR. Available on YouTube, you can move your IPad around to get a 360 view of the inside of the car. So, you change watch the Guitarist driving along, then turn back to see Sara playing around in the back. This way, you are given many choices to see this film. You can either watch the story unfold, or you can just sit back and see the world go by the side window. You can also look at the floor to see all the junk gets left there. It’s best to watch with a VR system. Pearl is a simple yet relatable coming of age story of growing up and achieving your dreams. Like I said, you can watch this on YouTube. – PIPER And now we have our inevitable Disney/Pixar short usually shown before a feature length. In this case, it’s the short film shown before Finding Dory. On the California seashore, the sandpipers rush across the shore searching for tiny clams to feed on. On this day, baby Piper will no longer rely on her mother to feed her. Now she joins in her first hunt. Too bad she doesn’t get the part where you’re supposed to retreat when the waves come in. After being washed ashore, Piper develops a fear of water. She doesn’t want to go near the waves, yet she still needs to eat. She comes to overcome her fears with the help of some tiny hermit crabs. Pixar scores again with another example of excellent animation and simple storytelling. The animation looks incredibly realistic, with stunning beach sides and photo realistic birds. Piper is especially adorable, especially in the amusing moment when she’s washed ashore, feathers a fluttered. I’m also amazed how they can capture tiny clams making bubbles under the sand. Piper so an amusing adorable little appetizer before the main course of Finding Dory. Who Will Win? This award will most likely go to Piper because, Disney. But I feel Pear Cider and Cigarettes is more deserving of the award, with its film noir stylized animation and complex character study. [1] Who already won an Oscar for Disney’s short film Feast.

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