#and the part ‘you would feel absolutely loved and safe’
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Cute Aggression [Sakura Haruka x Reader]
Pairings: Sakura Haruka x GN!Reader Word Count: ~1200 [Ao3 Link]
Summary: Your boyfriend is so cute you just want to bite him (and you do).
Warnings: Biting (duh), tiniest bit of suggestiveness at the end, written with aged up to adult Sakura in mind but you go crazy go stupid ig, anime watcher safe (one mention of a manga character but no spoilers), i think that's all???
Notes: Minimally edited so forgive me pls. Born of my desire to bite sakura bc he is sooo cute. here you go wind breaker fandom <3 anyway maybe if I get inspired I'll continue this. who knows.
Dating Sakura Haruka was like a dream come true for you. Finally, you were able to lavish him with the affection you were constantly holding back before in fear of revealing your feelings (and possibly ruining your friendship with him). Every time you held his hand, or ran a hand through his hair, or pressed a quick kiss to his lips, you felt a soft warmth flush through you. And, in complete contrast to how he acted years ago when you first met him, he no longer hissed and spat like a feral cat when any sort of kindness was shown to him. Now, though he still huffed and blushed at physical contact, he also reveled in it. Haruka leaned into every single one of your affections, even if they embarrassed him; and, in private, he would return them in his own shy way.
In short, you had grown comfortable expressing your adoration for him through physical touches, which is why you felt comfortable enough to do what you were about to do without thinking anything of it.
-
Haruka, though he was a bit dense, was well aware of how much he blushed. As much as it annoyed the shit out of him, he could never control the way he quickly turned from pale to pink to red at any nicety. Even though years around Furin and the affectionate weirdos who were a part of it, he would still flush often. It became worse again once he started dating you.
He couldn’t admit it (especially to the likes of Suo and Umemiya…nosy bastards…) but he adored when you were sweet with him. Before the two of you got together, you were always nice to him, complimenting him on everything from his fighting to his eyes to his kindness. But it was like the floodgates had opened after he confessed to you; now you expressed your love through both touch and words (a dangerous combination for Haruka’s heart). He liked that you were so comfortable touching him, even when he struggled to return the same actions expect in private. He liked it when you hugged him and kissed him and treated him like something precious. He avoided dwelling on his past as much as possible, but he couldn’t help but remember how a few years ago he could not have even fathomed being loved at all, much less in the all-encompassing way you loved him.
You were absolutely perfect to him, and you had given him the gift of falling in love and having that love reciprocated. That being said, sometimes you were fucking weird.
The two of you were snuggling on the couch, and you were stroking his hair and telling him how pretty he looked when he was relaxed. Haruka was slowly turning the shade of Kiryu’s hair, even as he melted into the scratch of your fingers against his scalp.
And then you leaned forward, and his eyes fluttered shut, anticipating a kiss. Instead of the soft feeling of your lips, however, he felt something sharp clamp down on one of his pink cheeks.
-
There were plenty of times when you looked at your boyfriend and thought “wow, he’s cute enough to eat.” The urge to take a bite out of Haruka ebbed and flowed like the tide; but it had reached dangerous flood levels since you started dating. According to Tsubaki, this was because of ‘cuteness aggression’, the same feeling that made you want to squish adorable baby animals like they were stress balls.
You never thought you’d act on the desire, but you had clearly gotten too used to inflicting upon Haruka your devotion through touch; therefore, you did not think this through.
He just looked so pretty sitting there, leaning his head into your hand, so relaxed he was almost purring with contentedness. His rosy face reminded you of his namesake, and the only coherent thought you had was “his cheeks look like sakura mochi” before you were leaning in.
The gentle clamp of your teeth over his soft flesh was just as satisfying as you dreamed, although you only got to experience it for a second before you let go at the screech your boyfriend let out. It took him a second to register what you did before he leapt away from the couch like a cat.
“THE HELL WAS THAT!?” Haruka yelped, scrubbing at the faint mark on his face with his hand. “ARE YOU A CANNIBAL OR SOMETHIN’?!”
You felt a surge of embarrassment, but luckily you were much better at hiding it than he was at hiding his. “No. That was just a love bite, baby.”
“A what?”
“A love bite! Because you were so cute it made me want to bite you. Affectionately.” You let a small wince surface on your face, despite your confident tone.
He squinted at you, confused. You could almost see the gears turning in his head, as if he was trying to remember if this was normal or not. “I don’t get it,” he admitted, cautiously sitting back down next to you. You almost joked that you wouldn’t bite, as if you hadn’t proven that false just seconds before.
You moved his hand out of the way so you could rub your thumb over his abused cheek, before pressing a soft kiss to it. Haruka tensed up a little, but he let out a small sigh and collapsed when he felt your lips instead of your teeth.
You felt a little bit bad, even though you enjoyed getting your teeth on him immensely. “I shouldn’t have done it to you out of the blue like that. I’m sorry.”
“’S fine, I just don’t understand,” he said gruffly.
“It’s called cuteness aggression…you know when something is so cute you just want to squeeze it or bite it or something like that?”
Haruka still seemed confused, but he gave a slow nod.
“That’s what I feel about you sometimes. I just like you so much I want to bite you. You’re sweet enough to eat, Haruka,” you murmured, punctuating it with a small kiss to the tip of his nose.
He made a sort of unintelligible sound, flushing again. After you gave him a minute to reboot, he said, “Well…I didn’t hate it, y’know. Ya just startled me, ‘s all…” he trailed off, avoiding meeting your eyes.
You recognized this behavior, and it made your eyes light up. “Awww, did you like it?”
“Shut up!” he squawked. A pause. Then, in a quieter voice, “I dunno. It was too fast, jus’ startled me. Didn’t even really know what was happenin’.”
“Want me to bite you again?”
He turned away. “Do whatever you want.” Tellingly, however, he had twisted in a way so that his cheek and his neck were fully exposed to you.
“Okay,” you said softly. “I’m going to bite you again. Tell me if you like it or not, okay?”
This time, when you leaned in, you bit into the long, creamy stretch of his exposed neck. It felt different than his cheek did under your teeth, but it felt just as good, if not better.
Haruka stiffened for a second, like a scared prey animal in the maw of a predator, before he shuddered and went limp with a small whine.
You released him after a few seconds, and admired the red mark left behind. You met your boyfriend’s gaze, taking in his glazed eyes and slightly open mouth.
“Yeah, I think I like it,” he whispered.
When you smiled, his eyes were drawn to your teeth.
#wind breaker#wind breaker x reader#wind breaker fluff#sakura haruka x reader#sakura haruka#sakura haruka fluff#haruka sakura x reader#romy can write#gender neutral reader#reader insert
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serial killer
summary: there’s a serial killer in town and reader is worried about her boyfriend, niki. he’s acting odd
warnings: murder, blood, yandere, forced kissing, obsessive love
word count: 1.8k
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it was a friday night, me and niki were sat on the couch watching a movie together. i was laying with my back against his chest whilst munching on some of my popcorn. “what happened?” the tv had suddenly switched from the movie we were watching to the news. “oops, sorry. i accidentally sat on the remote” i reached for it from under me and was about to switch back to the movie when the news caught my attention. “according to police reports, a new serial killer has been identified in our area. the killer has been linked to three murders in the past week. authorities describe the killer as a tall figure often dressed in black. the police are urging residents to report any suspicious activity immediately and we will continue to bring you updates. in the meantime, we want to remind you all to secure your homes and look out for one another. that’s all for now, stay safe” i was in absolute shock. a new serial killer in town? while i was trying to process these news, i felt niki’s hand stroking my arm. “niki.. i’m scared” i turned to look at him and he didn’t look scared at all, it looked like this wasn’t a shock to him. “there’s nothing to be scared of, ___. i’m here, okay? i’ll protect you. i always will” he pulled me in closer and placed a kiss on my forehead. it made me feel less scared and a lot more safer, i knew that i would always be safe with him.
“niki! we’ve run out of conditioner-“ i walked out the bathroom while drying my hair with a towel when i noticed niki putting his shoes on. “i’ll get some on my way back home” he opened the door and was about to leave before i slammed it shut which made him jump. “you mean to tell me that you’re going out, right now? at night? when there’s a serial killer out there? do you have a death wish, niki?” i refuse to let him leave, i don’t want a dead boyfriend. “baby come on. i’m just gonna meet up with jungwon, that’s it. i’ll be safe, i promise” he didn’t seem to be worried or anything, it was kinda odd. “but what about me? what if the killer breaks in and kills me, hm?” i crossed my arms while i was stood in front of him blocking the door. “that won’t happen” he sounded so sure about it too. “and how do you know that?” without giving me an answer, he placed his hands on my waist and lifted me up like it was nothing. he moved me away from the door so he could make his way out. “because i do. i’ll be back soon, i love you” he gave me a quick kiss on the lips before he left, closing the door behind him. i’m definitely not getting any sleep before he gets back. if he gets back..
i was sat on the couch watching tangled to try and make me feel less scared. i guess it kinda worked, until the evil old lady showed up on the screen. i let out a big sigh and my mind went to niki. was he okay? it’s only been an hour, and he did text me twice letting me know he was okay. i should stop overthinking, niki is fine- “i’m back!” i jumped up from the couch the second i heard his voice. i ran towards him and threw my arms around his neck. “i thought you died..” i hid my face in his neck and was very grateful to the fact that he was alive. “i’m really tired, but i couldn’t sleep since i was worried sick about you” i pulled away so i could finally look him in the eyes. i noticed how his hair was messed up and so were his clothes. wait, is that blood on his shirt? “see, i told you nothing would happen to me or you-“ “niki.. what’s that?” i used my finger to point at the red spot on his shirt. “oh, that. i just spilled my drink” i’m not sure why, but a part of me didn’t believe him. i shrieked when he picked me up by placing his hands under my thighs. “let’s go to bed. you said you were tired, yeah?” he walked us over to our bedroom and placed me down onto the bed. i watched him pull his red stained shirt over his head and throw it in the laundry basket. “so, how’s jungwon?” he turned to me with a confused look on his face, like he had no idea what i was talking about. “what?” “you told me you were gonna meet up with jungwon, remember?” i could tell realization hit him, did he lie to me? “oh, right. i was confused for a second because of how tired i am. but he’s good” i slightly nodded, but if i’m gonna be honest niki is acting really weird. he got in bed next to me after turning all the lights off. i could feel him wrap his arms around my waist and pulling me closer to him.
i woke up in the middle of the night with no sight of niki. i heard weird noises so i thought he was probably just getting himself water or using the bathroom, but he was taking too long. i stretched my arms before getting up to see what was taking him so long. “niki?” first i looked in the living room, then the kitchen and then the bathroom. where was he? i kept on hearing those noises, so i decided to follow them. suddenly, it stopped and i was stood in front of the door that lead down to the basement. i don’t usually go down there, why would i? out of curiosity and wanting to know where niki was, i slowly opened the door which made a creaking sound. “niki?” i repeated, no answer. as i made my way down the stairs i couldn’t see anything since it was pitch black, so i brought my phone out and used my flash light to look around. all i could see were cardboard boxes and just a bunch of junk we stored down here. i was about to go back up when i stepped in some kind of liquid, it was kinda thick and disgusting. when i flashed my phone down on my feet, my heart dropped when i realized what i stepped in was blood. even worse, fresh blood. “oh my god.. i’m gonna throw up..” i covered my mouth and started backing up when suddenly, i felt my back hit something making me jump. i quickly turned around and my blood went cold when i saw it was niki stood behind me. i was too scared to say anything, meanwhile he was just stood there looking down at me with a blank expression. the stairs were to my left, could i make a run for it? i counted down in my head.
3… 2… 1!
i quickly pushed niki to the side and made a run for it, but he clearly saw it coming. halfway up the stairs, i tripped when niki’s hand grabbed my ankle. i managed to kick his hand away making him groan in pain, “fuck!” it gave me enough time to get back up on my feet tho. when i had finally made it back up, i slammed the door shut behind me, but there was no lock on it. “shit..” get out of the house, that was my first thought. a few hours ago i’d be too scared to leave the house because of the serial killer, but i didn’t know that i was living with him and that he was my own boyfriend. i ran to the front door and jumped when i heard the door to the basement get slammed open. it made me stress and panic which is the reason to why i was struggling to open the door. “come on..!” i kept on twisting the door knob until i finally got it open. the second i stepped my foot outside, i got dragged back in by a strong muscular force and the door was slammed shut. knowing no one could hear me i still started screaming for help, but niki covered my mouth with his hand muffling the sound of my voice. he pushed me up against the wall and held me tightly since i kept on moving around. “shhh. be quiet” he started stroking my hair and leaned in closer to my face. “i’m not gonna hurt you, okay? i would never hurt you baby. i told you i’d always protect you” even though i now knew he was the one murdering people, he still made me feel safe with his words. i know that it’s wrong, he’s not a good person, but i can’t help it. i stopped moving around and screaming for help which resulted in him removing his hand from my mouth and loosening his grip on my body.
“why..?” he cocked his head at my question. “why?” he asked me. “why would you do that to those innocent people..?” i was full of mixed emotions. my eyes were teary, i had this lump in my throat and a pit in my stomach. “innocent? those people weren’t innocent” what? what does he mean by ‘they weren’t innocent’? “i don’t understand.. what did they do?” he placed his index finger on the center of my chest. “they all wanted you for themselves. i had to show them that it would result in bad consequences” did he.. murder people out of jealousy? i felt even worse, like i was about to pass out. “niki.. i can’t“ i pushed lightly at his chest but he didn’t dare to move. “please- get away from me.. i don’t feel so good” he still wouldn’t get out of my way, what was wrong with him? “it’s okay. i’ll make you feel good” “what?-“ i didn’t see it coming, but he smashed his lips onto mine and started kissing me relentlessly. i brought my hands up and started hitting his chest, signing him to get off of me. he didn’t seem to care tho. he just grabbed me by my waist and pulled me in closer to deepen the kiss. i felt him slide his tongue into my mouth, but the feeling of it was weird. he was making out with me whilst i was trying to resist him. he finally pulled away to catch his breath, and so did i. “do you feel better?” to my surprise, i did. the lump in my throat and the pit in my stomach had gone away once he kissed me, i just didn’t notice. he pressed his forehead against mine and looked into my eyes. “i won’t let anyone come near you, ever” the way he was acting, it wasn’t normal. but i couldn’t help but love him even more.
#enha x reader#enhypen fanfic#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen fic#enhypen x female reader#enhypen x reader#enhypen niki#niki enhypen#niki x reader#niki#niki enha#enhypen#enha#enhypen nishimura riki#nishimura riki
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Chapter 12: I thought I was better safe than starry-eyed
series masterlist
previous part || next part
pairing: colin bridgerton x enemy!fem!reader
WC: 3.5k words
Warnings: period-typical gender roles, insane amounts of pining, idiots in love!!, in their friends era... or are they?, the slow burn is slowww burningggg i'm so sorry
Summary: It took precisely two days in England for you to utterly despise Colin Bridgerton. It took him approximately twelve hours after that to hate you right back. But he doesn't care that you're the only person in the ton who doesn't like him. You're set to marry someone else anyway, right?
A/N: I am BACK sorry for my absence I promise I won't leave for that long again <3
July 12, 1816 – It seems that the summer heat is not the only thing causing a stir within the ton. Recently, the Montclair and Bridgerton families have been seen in each other’s company more frequently than usual. Could there be a more permanent union on the horizon?
Lord Philippe Montclair and Mr. Colin Bridgerton have been spotted in deep conversation on multiple occasions, discussing matters that appear far more serious than the usual lighthearted banter one would expect. Indeed, whispers suggest that their discussions have involved future business ventures and mutual interests, signaling a burgeoning camaraderie between the two gentlemen.
Regardless, the warmth between the two families is palpable, leading this author to wonder if we shall soon hear the sound of wedding bells. Stay vigilant, dear readers. Though no one shall stay more vigilant than this author.
As you walked home from the modiste with Eloise by your side, you noted the afternoon sun filtering through the leaves high atop the trees surrounding you. You had suggested a shortcut back to your respective homes, opting to go through the park rather than the busy streets, and you were mostly thankful for the silence of the greenery around you. Mostly.
“So, will you be joining us for dinner tonight?” asked Eloise expectantly, gently nudging your shoulder with hers.
You groaned and screwed your eyes shut, already dreading the conversation, and the evening, to come. “Yes, Mother has been quite insistent that I go. I think she’d kill me if I asked to stay home one more time.”
“I didn’t know we were that bad,” joked Eloise, only a hint of resentment in her voice.
“Not at all!” you rushed to defend yourself, cringing at the fact that one of your dearest friends was upset with you. “You know that it’s just… Well, I’m sure Colin told you everything. I really can’t bear to face him.”
In all honesty, Eloise’s annoyance was warranted. You had spent the past two weeks avoiding the Bridgertons at all costs, only seeing Eloise at balls or in your own home. The only reason you had gone to Bridgerton House today was because you and Eloise were leaving immediately afterward to go get new dresses, and you were certain you wouldn’t run into Colin.
Not only were you still terribly embarrassed by your assumptions of Colin's character, but you also found yourself strangely drawn to him. Now that nothing prevented you from actually liking him, and now that you knew that he was not a horrible person like you had previously thought, you were in a bit of a conundrum. Colin Bridgerton had charmed you, and you knew that if you let yourself, you could very well start to grow feelings for him.
And that wouldn’t do. No, it absolutely wouldn’t. For starters, the two of you had never managed to get along anyway, so you had no idea how you would even live in relative peace were you to have a future. Even so, your father would never approve, no matter what Lady Whisteldown was alluding to. And so Colin was out of the question as a husband or really anything other than a friend.
But while you had been meticulously maneuvering through your social outings to avoid her family, Eloise had slowly been losing patience. She had tolerated whatever had been going on between you and Colin at the beginning of the season, but it was high time that you stopped acting so childish. Especially after Anthony and Kate’s ball, where the two of you had already apologized for your misunderstanding and subsequent feud.
“I can’t believe you haven’t seen him since that night,” scolded Eloise, crossing her arms in a huff. Then, in a humorous tone, she added, “He doesn’t actually look that bad with a broken nose if that’s what you’re worried about. The swelling has gone down considerably.”
Not able to help yourself, you let out a small snort and smiled at your friend. “No, it’s not that. I’m just so embarrassed. Oh heavens, even just thinking about it I can feel my face getting hot. He did tell you about it, right?”
“Yes,” responded Eloise, giving you a very pointed look. “He was very excited about the fact that you didn’t actually hate him. He wouldn’t stop talking about it for two days. Though now I wonder if that really is the case, given your behavior.”
“Oh, no,” you groaned, putting your head in your hands in desperation.
“He was quite embarrassed as well, Y/N,” Eloise reminded you gently. “I don’t see why you can barely stand to be in the same room as him even now.”
“I just-” you started, finding it difficult to explain why you had been so against seeing him, or any of his family, really, after the most recent ordeal with Lord Barlow.
But Eloise wasn’t letting you get away with it any longer. She slowed down her previously brisk walk, looking straight into your eyes as she gestured for you to continue.
“I just wasted so much time and energy fighting with him and I’m so ashamed that your family saw that side of me. I didn’t even know I could be that unpleasant! And to make matters worse, it was all for nothing since I was completely in the wrong.”
“Not completely,” Eloise mused. Colin had been quite kind to you in his retelling of the events, and Eloise was inclined to believe her brother’s account.
With a sigh, your friend turned to face you. “I wish you had told me what you thought of him because I would have either helped you realize your mistake or helped you kill him.”
You laughed again, shaking your head as you realized how lucky you were to have Eloise in your life. Linking arms with her, you patted her hand as you explained, “I was just terrified of the recourse. My parents were so insistent that I ‘act ladylike’ that I was scared of revealing I had been unchaperoned in the presence of two men. And besides, I didn’t want to ruin your perception of your brother.”
“Well, regardless, it will all be resolved at dinner tonight, seeing how you’ll be in attendance.”
A soft sigh escaped your lips.
“I certainly hope so.”
---
As you walked into the dining room, a soft smile on your lips as you spoke with Kate, Colin’s breath was stolen from his body. He already hadn’t been expecting to see you, already growing accustomed to having you avoid him, but seeing you look as beautiful as you did now was completely doing him in.
“Y/N,” he whispered from across the room, unable to tear his eyes away from you.
Feeling an elbow digging into his ribs, Colin turned to see Benedict, smirking as he watched his younger brother. “Might I suggest pulling yourself together if you don’t want to scare her away again?”
“Be quiet,” hissed Colin, but he ran a hand through his hair to regain his composure anyway.
“Benedict!” you greeted, delighted at finally seeing him for so long. “And Colin!” you added, hoping your voice didn’t reveal the nervousness you were feeling.
“Lovely to see you again,” said Benedict brightly, squeezing your shoulder.
Then, feigning some obligation or another, the second Bridgerton slipped out of the dining room to join the rest of your families, leaving you alone with Colin. Benedict had been terribly obvious, but the resulting awkwardness that enveloped you and Colin kept you from noticing his brash exit.
“I’m happy you’re here,” Colin spoke, almost timidly. Then, speaking very quickly, he added, “I was fairly confused when I didn’t hear from you for two weeks, but I didn’t want to call on you because we agreed to just be friends and I didn’t want to give you the wrong impression. Though now that I think about it, that might have been the decent thing to do."
Sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck, Colin looked down at the floor as he waited for your response.
“Not at all!” you rushed out, wanting to reassure him. “It was my fault entirely. I apologize for not speaking with you sooner, I was just a tad embarrassed, as you can probably imagine.”
Colin’s shoulders relaxed and he smiled, feeling at ease now that he was certain you didn’t spontaneously hate him again.
“You were embarrassed? I rather think I should be the one feeling that way,” he laughed. “I still find it hard to believe you could have thought I was that... horrid for so long.”
You put your hands over your face and shook your head. “I can’t believe it either,” you groaned.
Sensing you were getting worked up again, Colin instinctively put a comforting arm around your shoulders, pressing you to him. “No, it’s quite alright. I promise I was just…”
Then, suddenly realizing just how close he was holding you to him, Colin stepped away quickly. Instead of apologizing and drawing even more attention to his overstepping, he settled for clearing his throat awkwardly, clasping his hands behind his back to keep from reaching out to you again.
“It was all in jest, I swear,” promised Colin, realizing he had never finished his earlier sentence.
Before you could respond, Violet walked into the dining room, followed by your family.
“Hello, Y/N!” she greeted you, reaching over to put a hand on your forearm in greeting. “I’m thrilled you’re here! We missed you last week.”
You smiled gratefully back at her, internally chastising yourself for ever wanting to avoid this wonderful family. All because you were scared of facing Colin, who, as it turned out, had a singular talent for making you feel at ease.
“You’re seated here, next to Colin,” indicated Violet, gesturing toward a seat near the end of the dining table.
“Oh,” you breathed out, not expecting to have to be in such proximity to him for the whole night. Realizing you had been impossibly rude, you added, “Thank you very much, I’m sure we’ll have lots to catch up on.”
Four courses later, you were having the time of your life. You were sitting between Francesca and Colin, and both had been keeping you endlessly entertained as you ate. Speaking to Colin came so naturally that you wondered how the two of you had ever managed to fight so much without ever having a proper conversation, save for one or two. It seemed impossible now, the forgone tension between you. Especially when you had to actively ensure that you were talking to Francesca, too, rather than just Colin. But he was just so easy to talk to, and you simply had so much in common that it was proving quite difficult to focus on anything else.
“Are you excited for your season next year?” you asked Francesca, leaning away from Colin so you could concentrate on speaking to her.
“I suppose I’m looking forward to having something of my own,” she responded after chewing thoughtfully. “An experience of my own, that is. It’ll be quite the luxury, especially being from a family as large as mine. Did you ever feel that way?”
You hummed, thinking back on your season. “I felt that way at the beginning, to be sure. But having seen my older sister’s fairytale romance and having a season that was nowhere near that had me wishing for a season similar to hers in the end.”
“Oh, I didn’t mean that-” Francesca started, having forgotten your ordeal with Lord Barlow.
You waved her apology away, smiling warmly at her. “Not to worry, I’m quite well-adjusted now. Perhaps next season will be better, though I’m not sure how unique it will be since I’m heading back to Spain, just as Isabelle did.”
“Are you really leaving?” asked Francesca, partially in shock that you were leaving after only one season. “But-”
“Y/N does,” came a loud voice next to you.
Confused, you turned around to face Colin, who seemed to have gone quite red in the face.
“I hadn’t realized I was speaking that loud,” he said bashfully, nervous now that most everyone at the table was looking at him expectantly. “Anthony was only talking about how I use the night sky to navigate my crew when I travel, and I was pointing out that you are quite knowledgeable in that area as well,” he explained, looking at you with wide, uncertain eyes.
Anthony, who had been at the other side of the table, was struggling to contain his laughter.
“I had no idea Y/N knew so much about the stars,” commented Violet, looking directly at Colin as she did so, an unreadable expression on her face.
Highly uncomfortable at being the center of attention for this particular reason, the third Bridgerton internally cringed and gulped his wine, hoping to wash down some of the discomfort as he did so.
“We’ve only talked about it a few times, but she does seem to be quite the expert,” he said finally.
Feeling charitable, Louis chimed in to change the subject, “I know I’ve been victim to her hour-long lectures about which constellations are visible at any given point in time. Were you thinking of traveling soon, Anthony?”
Letting out a sigh of relief now that the attention was no longer fixed on his thinly veiled infatuation with you, Colin cast a fleeting smile in your direction, eager to gauge your reaction.
But you only smiled amusedly at him, snickering as he gripped his fork and knife tightly in his hands with leftover tension.
“Tell Louis I say thank you,” he muttered.
You shook your head. “It’ll get to his head,” you argued.
And Colin’s smile in return was so charming, so roguish, and so handsome that you were tempted to forget your agreement to be friends right then and there.
Ah, that was why you had been avoiding him, you reminded yourself. Colin was far too charismatic for his own good. For your own good, rather.
But you had to remind yourself of what your parents –and society– expected you to find. A man with a title and a fortune. And that was decidedly not a Mr. Colin Bridgerton.
Clearing your throat, you turned away from Colin to face Francesca again.
Friends, you reminded yourself. You were friends with Colin.
---
The Montclair brothers sat in their father’s study, brandy in hand as they so often did after evening dinners ran long and they needed to wind down. Supper with the Bridgertons had been lovely, but the boys had important matters to discuss with their father. Well, important matters to you. But important nonetheless.
“Que pensez-vous de Colin?” asked Jacques, trying to seem nonchalant (What do you think of Colin?).
“Bah, il est assez gentil, mais il est vraiment amoureux,” came your father’s gruff response before he took a long sip of brandy, rubbing his temples (Well, he’s nice enough, but he’s definitely in love).
“Quoi? Amoureux de qui?” pressed Philippe, feigning innocence as if this wasn’t exactly what the brothers wanted Lord Montclair to notice (What? In love with who?).
“De Y/N, bien sûr,” replied your father, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world (With Y/N, of course).
That was the tipping point for Louis, who apparently was the only person in the world who wasn't instantly attuned to Colin’s feelings. Forgetting why he and his brothers were so eager to meet with their father and talk about Colin, the youngest Montclair brother set his glass of brandy down in exasperation.
“Putain, comment tout le monde a pu voir ça?” (Damnit, how did everyone else see that?)
---
Laughing quietly at a comment Colin had whispered in your ear, you found yourself truly enjoying a ball for the first time in a very long time. Now that you were past all the hatred and subsequent awkwardness, it was lovely to spend an evening with Colin by your side.
This might have been the first ball you had been to that you hadn’t spent a considerable amount of time sulking at. It was, to say the very least, quite freeing.
Not to mention the absolute entertainment that was watching the third Bridgerton rush from ambitious mama to eligible lady and back to another mama as he attempted to please everyone. You had only been here an hour and he’d already danced three times and spoken with at least four women you knew for a fact he had no interest in.
“Ah, Mr. Bridgerton, it’s lovely to see you again,” came a voice behind you.
Both of you turned around to face Miss Anne McCall, who was looking at Colin expectantly. Amused, you raised your eyebrows at him, too. You could bet your family’s entire fortune that Colin had promised her a dance at some point tonight.
He cleared his throat awkwardly, briefly touching your arm. “Excuse me just a moment, Y/N.”
You nodded, unable to respond because you were momentarily overtaken by the feel of his hand on you. An unfamiliar warmth radiated to you, and you almost stumbled as you tried to regain your bearings.
Looking out across the ballroom, you spotted Colin smiling and laughing as he danced with Miss McCall, who was looking absolutely enamored as he spun her around. You smiled to yourself, glad that your rivalry with him had been resolved and you could simply appreciate the fact that he was a lovely person. Maybe some night you would be the one he was spinning around the ballroom.
Shaking your head to will the mental image away, you made your way to the other side of the ballroom, needing to clear your head.
However, a hand gripped yours and you turned around, surprised. Colin’s relieved eyes met yours and he pulled you closer to him, though still allowing an appropriate distance between you two in case anyone was observing.
“A turn about the ballroom?” he suggested, eyes pleading.
Once again taken aback by how aware you were of his skin on yours, you could only nod, allowing him to place your hand in the crook of his elbow.
“Thank you,” he murmured. “I think I’ve spoken to too many people tonight. If I have to laugh politely at another conversation I’m certain I will dissolve right where I'm standing.”
You rolled your eyes good-naturedly, squeezing his arm. “You don’t have to do it, you know?”
“Do what?”
“That,” you said, gesturing toward the dancefloor full of couples waltzing. “You’re allowed to say no.”
Colin frowned, thoughtful. “I wouldn’t want to disappoint them.”
“Why not?” you pressed.
“I- I don’t know, I suppose. It feels like it’s what I should be doing. Doesn’t everyone?”
“Hmm, not particularly. I’ve said no to plenty of men wanting to dance with me, you included,” you nudged him playfully.
“That doesn’t really count, though. Because you’re… you. It doesn’t matter if you say no to every single man asking you to dance.”
“Doesn’t it? You’re also you. So, it doesn’t matter either.”
“No, I mean that…I don’t know what I mean. I suppose that people would still like you even if you said no a lot.”
Your eyebrows shot up as you took in what Colin was saying.
“People would still like you if you said no every once in a while, you know? I know I would.”
Colin shook his head. “It’s still different!” Then, softening his voice, he added, “Because you have… Or rather, because I just don’t have any remarkable qualities beyond people finding me charming or affable.”
“Colin,” you scolded, rolling your eyes. Then, seeing that he was quite serious, your expression sobered. “Of course you have value beyond how much people like you. My word, Colin. You are so clever and so well-traveled. You can orient yourself on a map at first glance, and I doubt you would ever get lost at sea. You know most constellations visible from London, and I don’t even know how many beyond that.”
“Alright, I see your point,” he laughed, secretly wishing you would continue speaking forever. Colin was practically preening at your praise, and he so desperately wished you could want him the way he wanted you. “What do you suggest I do at balls, then, if I'm not dancing with every single member of the ton?”
“Well, you could start by only dancing with people you want to dance with.”
“In that case, would you like to dance with me?”
You laughed, shaking your head. “No, I’m serious.”
“So am I,” insisted Colin. Then, after a pause, he added, “Friends can dance together," a twinge of regret in his chest as he said the words.
But that seemed to placate you, and you placed your hand in his. “I suppose they do.”
With a shaky breath, you prepared for the next few minutes you would spend in Colin’s arms, not quite sure you or your heart were ready to look into his mesmerizing eyes and not fall completely head over heels for him.
But one smile from him, and you were completely at ease. One dance couldn’t hurt, right?
—
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#bridgerton#colin bridgerton#colin bridgerton x reader#enemies to lovers#colin bridgerton imagine#colin bridgerton fanfic#colin bridgerton fanfiction#bridgerton fanfic#bridgerton fanfiction#bridgerton imagine#bridgerton x reader#colin bridgerton fluff#colin bridgerton angst#colin bridgerton x enemy!reader#bridgerton x you#colin bridgerton x you#bridgerton fluff#bridgerton angst#lost in translation#lost in translation: writing
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Recovery - Chapter 40
Summary : Y/N tells Marshall she cheated on him.
Tags : Angst - Smut - Fluff
Thank you again to @shady-577 who kindly agreed to read this chapter beforehand and did a great job at motivating me when I was writing that SMUTTY part 🥵
Marshall stared at you for what felt like ages. He wasn’t mad, no. He was beyond livid. You’d seen him angry and pissed off before… or so you thought. He didn’t need to say a single word, though. The energy he exuded was enough for the whole block to know go he felt. You were feeling ashamed and helpless. It felt like there was absolutely nothing you could do and you just had to wait for his wrath to come down on you. Whatever it was that he was ready to throw at you, it was probably deserved, and there was no denying that. At some point, he had been silent for so long that you avoided his gaze. Him starting at you so silently was almost creepy. You were just sitting here, tears streaming down your face, waiting for him to say a word.
- Did he force you ? He finally asked.
- He didn’t, you said as you kept on crying.
- You wanted it ?! He asked in disbelief.
- No, I-, you began.
- So he did force you, he said as he cut you.
- No, you cried. I mean… I’m the one who kissed him.
- No you weren’t, he said. You wouldn’t do that. You would never.
- I did, you cried. And I’m so sorry. But I… I…
- You what ? He spat. You fell and your tongue accidentally ended up in his mouth ?!
- I kissed him because I needed to feel good again, you cried. I kissed him because I felt dirty and ashamed because the one person who said he would always have my back and protect me fed me to the wolves. I have spent all week being harassed on social media, witnessing people celebrating the return of Slim Shady and making awful montages of me ! I was feeling worthless and he was there. So yes, I kissed him. Because, for one split second, I felt seen and worthy again. I kissed him because I wanted to feel loved.
You were bawling, struggling to get the words out of your mouth, but it felt good. You could feel Marshall staring at you even though it was hard to decipher his expression, your vision being clouded by the tears in your eyes.
- I know I shouldn’t have, you said. I know it’s wrong and I hate myself for betraying you this way. I’m so sorry… and I know cheating is never ok but…
- Did you sleep with him ? He asked.
- No, you replied earnestly. It was just a kiss.
- How was it ?
- How was what ? You asked confused.
- Describe it, he instructed. I want to know.
- I… it was a kiss, you said. Just a kiss.
- How did it feel ? He asked. Did you like it ?
- Familiar, you replied. Comfortable. But I-I didn’t like it.
- Why is that ?
- Marshall, do we have to do this ? You asked with pleading eyes. I’m so sorry…
- Answer me, he said coldly.
- I… I didn’t like it because it didn’t feel right, you said. I immediately regretted it. Because it was familiar and it felt safe but it wasn’t you.
- Do you love him ? He asked. Is he the one you want to be with ?
- No. Of course not ! You cried. You’re the one I want to be with ! But I was hurt, and lost, and I know it doesn’t make it right but… there’s nothing else I can say. I fucked up.
He nodded and stayed silent. He took his face in his hands and didn’t move for a couple of minutes. Then, he took a breath and looked at you intently.
- Alright, he said.
- Alright ? You asked nervously.
- Do you want to be with me ? He asked back.
- I… yes, you said.
You were lost. You expected him to leave you on the spot, insult you… hell, even though you knew he wasn’t violent, you would have expected him to hit you rather than the reaction he was having.
- Good, he said. We’re going to get through it.
- Aren’t you mad ? You asked in confusion.
- I’m not mad, Y/N, he stated. I am beyond mad. But it doesn’t change what I said ten minutes ago. I love you, I want to be with you and we will get through this.
- O-ok, you said as you tried to dry your tears.
- Here’s what we’re going to do : you’re going to pack your bags and you’re coming home with me. Tonight. And tomorrow, I’m booking a therapy session for the both of us. Alright ?
- Ok, you nodded nervously.
You went upstairs and quickly prepared your things. When you went back downstairs, he was speaking with Talia and Jamal. Things seemed tense but civil nonetheless. You hugged your friends and thanked them profusely for taking care of you.
- Call us if you need anything, baby, Talia said.
- Of course, you replied.
- And you, Jamal told Marshall, you better take good care of her. Understood ? I swear on Talia, if you fuck it up…
- Yeah, Marshall replied. I know.
They stared at each other for a second before eventually dapping each other and you went on your way. The car ride home was relatively silent. You weren’t too sure what to say. As soon as Marshall said he wanted to work things out and that he didn’t want to dump you, you had felt relieved but now it was becoming apparent that the hardest part might be in front of you, not behind. He carried your bags and you went to the bedroom.
- Time for bed, he said. You look exhausted. I’ll call the therapist in the morning.
- Ok, you said timidly. Marshall, I… I’m really sorry, you know ?
- I know, he said. I’m sorry too.
You looked in his eyes, hoping to find something you could hold on to, in order to feel safe, more at ease. He was staring intently but his jaw was clenched. There was a hardness to him. You immediately lowered your gaze. He placed a hand on your shoulder and a chaste kiss on your forehead.
- I’ll let you get ready for bed, he said.
- Aren’t you coming ? You asked nervously.
- Yeah, in a minute.
He disappeared and you unpacked your bags, before grabbing a nightgown and matching silk robe from your closet. You got in bed and waited for Marshall. It was your first time sleeping in your bed in a week and, even though it was your house, your bedroom, it felt foreign. Without Marshall by your side, the bed was cold. You waited for a couple of hours but he didn’t come. You nervously got up and went downstairs, where you found him sitting on the couch, face in his hands.
- Marshall…? You asked.
- Sorry, he said. I’m coming. I just need a minute.
- Are you alright…?
- Of course not, he scoffed. How the fuck can I be alright when my woman kissed someone else ?! When someone else touched her ?! How can you expect me to be alright when you went and made out with your fucking ex boyfriend ?!
- I’m sorry, you said as tears started welling in your eyes.
- Being sorry doesn’t change anything, he replied coldly. I should know.
You nodded nervously as the tears started to silently stream down your face. He looked at you and sighed.
- Go back to bed, honey, he said. I’ll sleep here tonight.
- You could always take the guest room, you said.
- I’d rather keep my distance, he said. I’m sorry.
- And not even sleep on the same floor ? You asked. Look, if you don’t think we can-
- I want us to work things out, he said. I do. And I want you with me. That’s the plan. But right now, I’m pissed and you don’t want me around, babe. I swear.
- Why ? You asked as you sat next to him. You said we can get through this. Because it’s us.
- Because, right now, the only thing on my mind is to remind you of whose girlfriend you are, he groaned. Of who you belong to. Of taking back everything that’s mine, that this motherfucker got his hands on.
His eyes were dark and, from the tone of his voice, you knew just how he wanted to remind you that you were his. Truth was, even when you kissed Simon, you had never stopped being Marshall’s. Not even for a second. Which was probably the worst thing about all of it. You looked at him for a second and let your silk robe fall to the floor, leaving you in your nightgown. He stared at you intently, not saying a word.
- ok, you simply whispered.
- You want this ? He asked with a raised eyebrow.
- I want you, you nodded.
- I won’t be nice, he said.
- Don’t be nice, then.
His arm reached for you and pulled you to him. You were straddling his lap, trying to find balance when he kissed you hungrily. One of his hands was on your hip while the other was on your neck, letting you know he was in charge. You weren’t wearing anything under your nightgown, so your pussy was completely bare against his thigh. You let out a moan and he gently bit your lip before resuming the intense making out.
- Is that how you kissed him ? He asked. Did he ever kiss you like this ?
- N-No, you said breathily.
- Good, he said coldly. Now, tell me, where did he touch you ?
- What ? You asked in confusion.
- Where were his hands ? He asked. I need to know.
- He… he cupped my face, you said nervously. And he touched my shoulder… and he had his hand on my hip.
He brought a hand to your face, stroking your cheek. Then, he placed his hands right where you had described Simon touching you.
- like this ? He asked.
- Yes, you nodded.
He tightened his grip on you and kissed you again, making you feel just how possessive he was.
- You said you were mine, he reminded you. The night we got together. You said it.
- I am yours, you replied in a pleading voice.
- So you think you can just go and give away what is mine ? He groaned.
- N-No, you said. I’m yours. I’m all yours.
- Is that mouth mine ? He asked in between kisses.
- Yes, you almost cried. It’s yours.
- Show me, then, he directed.
You proceeded to kiss him softly, cupping his face, running your fingers in his hair. He hummed into the kiss before letting out a groan. Then, without giving you any notice, he planted a kiss in your neck before sucking on it, causing you to gasp a the intensity. You knew it would leave a mark but you didn’t care one bit in that moment. Then, his mouth went to your shoulder, right where Simon had touched you, and he bit it, not too harshly, but enough for his teeth to leave a mark.
- Mine, he groaned. You’re mine.
You nodded and, before you could say anything, he was ripping your silk nightgown off your body and biting your hip before sucking on it, causing you to let out a small cry. His piercing blue gaze inspected you, as if to make sure you were ok, and he kissed you again, letting his hands wander on your body. You were under his spell, willing to please him and let him know you were his, his only. You fell to your knees and looked at him, asking for permission. He simply nodded, letting you get to work. You undid his sweatpants and boxers, letting his cock spring free. You pumped it a couple of times before starting to lick and suck on it. You closed your eyes, focusing, and heard him gasp as his length reached the back of your throat, triggering a bit of a gag reflex on your part. You kept on sucking, trying to take as much of him as you could.
- This mouth is mine, huh ? He asked.
You nodded and he gently stroked your cheek before putting your hair into a makeshift ponytail and using it to direct your movements. Before you knew it, he was fucking your mouth as you were trying to keep up. You were a drooling mess, with tears streaming down your cheeks. You half expected him to come in your mouth but he didn’t. In fact, he kept going for a long time, your jaw starting to ache. At one point, though, you couldn’t take it anymore and had to tap on his thigh to let him notice you were gasping for air. When he let go of your mouth, his cock was shining, full of your saliva. While you were composing yourself, breathing some much needed air, he shed the rest of his clothes and, when he was done, he grabbed your hand and helped you get back up.
- I’m not done with you, he said. I’m going to remind you who you belong to. So that you never forget it again.
You nodded and he kissed you before having you bend over the dining room table, your tits against the cold glass. You felt his hand on your butt, squeezing it, giving it a little slap. He kneeled behind you and started licking your pussy, no doubt feeling how wet you were. You could hear the sound of your own arousal when he inserted two fingers, curving them so they’d hit just the right spot. His tongue was stroking your clit, making you see stars.
- I’m going to come, you warned.
- No, he said firmly as he stopped what he was doing.
- Wh-what ? You asked.
- I decide when you come, he said. You don’t.
You were about to protest when he grabbed you firmly and had you sit on the edge of the table before entering you. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck, trying to find balance while he was pounding hard into you. He usually gave you some time to get used to him being inside but not this time. You were gasping and moaning each time he hit your cervix. And right when you were going to come, he stopped and had you change position, putting you in doggystyle on the couch. He resumed the thrusting, one hand playing with your clit, the other gently teasing your asshole while he was pounding into you. This had you losing your mind and you were unable to hold your orgasm. Your legs were shaking and tears were rolling down your cheeks as you were crying in pleasure.
- What did I say about cumming ? Marshall asked.
- I’m sorry, you panted.
- If you want orgasms, I’ll give you some, he said with a grin.
He made you come again and again, using and abusing your holes. Everything around you was a blur and your senses could only focus on Marshall, sliding in and out of you, leaving bites all over your body. You weren’t even capable of forming coherent thoughts and simply mumbled « ohs » and « ahs ». With everybody orgasm, you were sure you couldn’t take any more but he gladly proved you wrong.
- Did he ever fuck you like this ? He asked.
- Who ?
- That motherfucker, he groaned. Don’t make me say his name. Did he ever make you come like this ? Did he ever make you squirt like that ?
- N-no, you cried. No, he didn’t.
- That’s right, he said as he kept on stroking your clit.
You could feel your limbs spasming and, as he tried to get you to ride him, you found that you were absolutely unable to stand. You started doubting that you were able to go again but he encouraged you as he fucked himself into you.
- One more, baby, he said. Give me one more.
- I can’t, you cried.
- Yes you can, he said before biting your neck once again.
Your eyes rolled back into your skull and, for half a second, you wondered if there was such a thing as dying from too many orgasms. Was it the death you were destined to die ? Dying in the arms of Marshall as he bottomed into you, causing screams of equal pain and pleasure ? But you couldn’t tell him to stop. Not even if you wanted to. And you didn’t even want to. You felt your muscles contracting around him one last time and he almost stopped, causing you to whimper and cry in frustration.
- Whose pussy is it ? He asked.
- Min- No, no, yours !
- Who do you belong to ? He asked again.
- You, you cried. I-I belong to you.
He let out a grunt and thrusted into you a couple more times, chasing both of your highs. You felt him twitch inside of you as he came inside, before collapsing on top of you. You were trembling and shuddering, crying tears of pleasure and pain. You were sure you blacked out for a moment. When you came to your senses, Marshall’s fingers were tracing the features on your face.
- I love you, he said emotionally.
- I love you too, you mumbled.
- Are you ok ? He asked with a concerned look.
- Mmmmmh, you groaned.
- Mmmh yes or mmmmh no ? He asked with a raised eyebrow.
- Mmmyes, you painfully articulated.
He pressed a kiss to your forehead and you realized just how sweaty you were. You were laying on the floor, in a puddle of your own release. As you slowly regained your senses, you took notice of just how sore you were and, as soon as you tried sitting up, you let out a painful gasp. Evidently, your body has been put through a lot.
- Don’t move, honey, he directed.
- M’so sore, you complained.
- I bet, he said softly. How about a bath ?
You nodded and closed your eyes. You were feeling completely spent and unsure whether or not you’d be able to move ever again. He lifted you and carried you bridal style to the bathroom where he drew a bath for the both of you. He was incredibly soft and gentle, contrasting with the roughness with which he had fucked you senseless. Every part of your body was sore, from your throat to your pussy and ass, to your legs, without mentioning your neck and back. Marshall gently lathered you with soap and massaged your back. As his hands went to your legs, you automatically closed them.
- Don’t worry, I’m done with you for now, he chuckled.
- You better be, you mumbled. Nearly killed me.
He scoffed and placed a small kiss on your shoulder before applying some cleanser to your face, which direly needed it. Between drool, sweat and other bodily fluids that had dried on it, it felt terrible. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the softness of Marshall’s touch. He seemed to be back to his and loving self. When you were done with the bath, he wrapped you in a towel and carried you to the bedroom. He let you down on the bed and went to his closet to get some comfy clothes for you to wear.
- Sorry I tore the nightgown, babe, he said as he helped you get dressed. I’ll get you another one.
- Ok, you yawned.
You let your head fall on the pillow and he pressed a kiss to your forehead, making sure you were comfortable. He asked you a couple of questions but most of your responses were monosyllabic. You were all sore, fucked-out and overall exhausted. He got up and, as he reached the door, you were suddenly worried.
- You’re leaving ? You asked anxiously in a throaty voice.
- I think I have some cleaning to do downstairs, he replied with a smirk.
- Oh, right, you mumbled.
- I’ll come back with water and snacks in a few. You just rest, ok ?
- Thanks for taking care of me, you whispered.
- I love you, you know ? He asked.
- I love you too, you said emotionally. And I am yours. All yours.
- I know, he said.
He went downstairs and you glanced at the window. It was already morning and the sun was rising. It was beautiful and it gave you a sense of peace. When Marshall came back, you were staring at the sun dreamily. He handed you a bottle of water and sat in bed next to you.
- It’s beautiful, you said.
- It is, he agreed.
You turned and noticed he was staring at you. You blushed and lowered your gaze. He cupped your face and kissed you gently.
- We should sleep, baby, he said.
You nodded and laid down. He cuddled you in a spoon position, stroking your hair and tracing circles on your scalp.
- Are you ok ? You asked. Are you still… mad ?
- I don’t know. I think I’m still hurt, he admitted.
- I’m sorry, you said. I really am…
- I know, baby, he said. So am I.
- Do you think we’ll be ok ? You asked nervously.
- I hope so, he said. That’s what I want. I want us to forgive each other and move on.
You nodded and turned around, burying your face in his neck. He mumbled a few love words in your ear and you fell asleep in his arms.
When you woke up, you were still exhausted. You were alone in bed and assumed Marshall had gone to the studio to get some work done. Your whole body was sore and you struggled to get out of bed to go downstairs. As soon as you got in the living room, you were met with Marshall, who was speaking to Tracy. You immediately felt self-conscious to appear in Marshall’s clothes, with messy hair and a morning face. You also wondered what she was doing here. You knew that, before you lived here, she often came to Marshall’s place for work purposes, but ever since you had moved in, she hadn’t been around - which was fine with you.
- Hey babe, Marshall said with a smile. Didn’t think you’d be up so early.
- Bed was empty, you shrugged. Hi Tracy.
- Hi, Y/N, she said rather awkwardly. I… didn’t realize you were back.
- I am, you said equally awkwardly. I… live here, you know ?
- I know, she said. I just… Marshall mentioned you weren’t there, lately. But I’m glad to see you’re back !
The whole thing was rather awkward. She was staring at you intently. You were in Marshall’s clothes and it definitely had a pajama feel to it, but at least, you were decent. You shot a glance at Marshall, as if to ask what her deal was. He stared back and pretended to scratch his neck. You raised an eyebrow and looked at the mirror. You were wearing an oversized tee-shirt and sweatpants but they didn’t hide the marks all over your arms and necks. You looked as if you’d been in a car crash, or attacked by some psychopath. You expected to see some hickies, but were definitely surprised to notice bruises and some distinct bite marks, in your neck and all over your arms. You didn’t even remember Marshall biting you there. You covered your mouth and felt your face flush with embarrassment.
- So, there’s what you asked for, Tracy said as she handed Marshall a bag. I’ll be at the office with Paul all day. Call me if you need anything ?
- Thanks, Marshall said. Can you cancel my recording session with Royce tomorrow ? I need the afternoon free.
She left and Marshall handed you the bag Tracy had given him. It was a new phone.
- Sent her to the Apple Store this morning, he chuckled. Figured you’d need a new one.
- Thanks, you said before kissing his cheek. I wondered what she was doing here.
- I know you don’t like being around her, but I couldn’t exactly go there by myself without causing a riot, he chuckled. Last time I tried was a nightmare. I would have ordered in online but delivery takes longer.
- I’ll admit that having an assistant must come in handy, you giggled. She did not seem happy to see me.
- I think she was just surprised, he shrugged. By your appearance, mostly.
- Speaking of which… you fucking marked me !
- I think I got a little carried away, he admitted. But in my defense, every time I bit you, you moaned in pleasure. I simply obliged.
- So it’s not a revenge because you’re jealous ? You asked with a raised eyebrow.
- I’ll plead the fifth, he chuckled. Guess it’ll serve as a reminder that you are spoken for. Both for you and the rest of the world.
- I think the rest of the world will call 911 if they see me like this, you pointed out. You’re crazy !
- About you, yes, he said with a smile. Speaking of crazy… we have an appointment for therapy tomorrow.
- Ok, you said nervously. Do you think it’s going to work ?
- I’m willing to try anything, he said. I’m not losing you. I’m not giving up on us.
#eminem#marshall mathers#slim shady#eminem fanfiction#recovery fanfiction#eminem x reader#eminem fluff#eminem imagine#marshall mathers x reader#marshall mathers imagine
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Realistically, I think a lot about just snuggling on the couch with you. My arms wrapped around you, a soft kiss on the cheek or forehead...you would feel absolutely loved and safe.
Now, if you decide to gets handsy, I'd have zero problem switching gears and slipping inside you while we make out, or having you bounce up and down on me, pressing your tits into my face. Your softness would absolutely make me hard.
But if you were content to just fall asleep in my arms, head resting on my shoulder/chest, I'd be over the moon with excitement.
- A mutual 😚
#I’m screaming??????????????#‘I think a lot about just snuggling on the couch with you’#……. you think about me??????#and snuggling on the couch with…. ME?#and the part ‘you would feel absolutely loved and safe’#IM FUCKING SOBBING#this is absolutely all I want right now#I’m a snuggle bug and if we are together I’ll always want to be touching in some way#cuddling holding hands whatever#but ngl I am ‘bad’ at cuddling…. especially when it comes to spooning#I like to wiggle and get all comfy and usually at that point I feel something start to grow against my ass and I just……. gotta ya know help#gotta get in that right spot 😉😉😉😉 if ya know what I mean and just kinda grind my ass against you 😇#so yeahhhh I feel like it wouldn’t be long until I’m moaning your name 🫣#but if I’m going to be really honest with you?#that first and last part really got me#I would love love love to be all snuggled up with someone safe and warm and loved#feeling their love radiate and wrap around me like a lil blanket#that entire last line killed me btw#that is what I yearn for#I know plenty of you want to fuck me#but I’m just craving a connection where we can just lay snuggled up with each other#talking and laughing and falling asleep feeling warm and happy#that is what I want#I have a love/hate relationship with sex tbh but I will always ALWAYS crave love and romance and cuddles and soft kisses and praise#sighhhhhhh#one day#fav asks#this seriously made my day???#come here and let’s cuddle and talk and maybe kiss a little bit 🥺#ask
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Brain still soup but like. I think making one or both (or more!) characters involved in relationships with each other aromantic makes the dynamic soooooo much more compelling. Because if you remove romance as a motivator, you really get down to the nitty-gritty as to WHY that character is seeking out/involved in those relationships in the first place. Whether that relationship involves romantic factors or is more of a queer platonic thing. Much to think about....
#like i WANNA give examples but also it's always so difficult for me to parse it out too#but sharena being someone who longs for love but can never quite grasp it for herself is sooo real to me#while maintaining her harem like. how she still seeks out these relationships anyway. BECAUSE she wants it so bad#because she can't quite grasp it fully herself.#also veronica taking one look at sharena and not even fully able to grasp it herself. and going 'sharena clearly doesn't know what love is'#recognition of the self through the other (derogatory)#also this is something i'm exploring aaaall the fucking time w moe/alfonse.#juries still out on if i hc alfonse as any flavor of aro (i do think it'd be funny/if he was i think he'd be demi)#but like. w moe being 2 for 2 demiro/sexual. you might think that would make things easier?#but no. bc it's also extremely romance repulsed. as much as it wants to spread love and cheer. it is a hater. fervently.#and then there are cases like lif/thrasir that read as a qpr to me. only having each other in this deep intimate way#that's devoid of any romance/sexuality.#BUT IT'S ABOUT THE OBSESSION. going back to moe. IT'S ABOUT ACCIDENTALLY BECOMING THE SAME PERSON#which i think happens to a degree w moe and ABSOLUTELY happens/happened w sharena/peony#it's also about asking what does this character WANT. what is the core of their desire#is it to fill an aching absence? is it to feel safe? to feel understood? to feel loved?#when your entire life you've felt you've been loved wrong/were unable to love correctly?#is it friendship? is it sexuality? esppp in the case of aro/allos!!!! like!!!! that happens!!!!!#and ofc! you have your aros who just don't. and that's okay!#but i never want being aromantic to be like. an easy way to write off a character who 'gets in the way'#or rewrite something you didn't like in canon. like. there are ways to do that second part#without doing the same shit i see people do w autistic people. writing off a character#or a hc in the most abliest way fucking possible. it's egregious.
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shining solo ep 8. my reaction rn 😐😐 took it a bit hard lmao
#tp#very mixed feelings. as someone who associates herself with jeongwoo and having very similar personalities... this ep hurt a lot#idk idk#i mean i get it but i also absolutely do not get it#so many thoughts im taking this very personally what the heck#i cant really warm up to half of this part's girlies im sorry#i loved everyone on part one#as someone who also struggles with managing my social energy lvls... this was a slap in the face#bc my boy jeongwoo truly gave it his ALL the whole day and even managed to perform a couple songs for the girls#despite already having spent the whole day together#and his energy must have been SPENT already and then they pick him as MVP of the day and he has that 1:5 date with all of the girls#by himself!! which is so terrifying imagine being the one person who everyone's attention is on and you have to interact with these ppl#that you arent very comfortable with but you still try your best to give them a good time#AND THEN!! they give you NOTHING in return?? not even a recorder?? no jewel no recording nothing. just ignored like that by everyone#and i get that the girls dont know who's voting for who so they might have believed someone else was gonna give him a jewel or sth#but no one gives him anything (positive OR negative)#and yeah. he was absolutely shocked at the empty safe. i would have been too.#and why did they not give him a jewel y'all might ask??? IT WAS BC HE FELL SILENT DURING THE LAST BIT: THE DINNER#my gosh that's the part that i take offense to personally bc it's really really really difficult to always engage in convos with ppl#after spending the whole day with them already?? and your social battery is down so you quietly enjoy a simple meal??#and then all the girlies threw him away like that??#i mean yeah you're surrounded by sweet men who spend the day appealing themselves to you but come on??#i would have been so impressed by jeongwoo and thankful that he put that much effort in and would understand how difficult it is to#maintain it till the very end because not everyone has hyunsuk's boundless social energy#no offense hyunsuk i love you dearly#and also??? what's up with admitting that you lack some confidence upfront??#the girl's reasoning for giving yoshi the voice recorder was that he said he holds himself to a high standard and lacks confidence sometimes#and i get it. being confident is more attractive than someone who's always insecure and puts themselves down#(and makes the other person uncomfortable) but they were having an honest and deep convo when the thing he said in that convo was used#against him in the end? i would feel kind of betrayed too bc being able to admit that you feel insecure sometimes is a v brave thing to do!!
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man. cloudstar is really such a tragic character. he did everything he could. he tried and tried. but in the end none of that really mattered, did it? doomed and cursed by the narrative
#cicada blabs#cicada's reread#and it's not even that he doomed himself by not asking for help sooner#if the other clans weren't willing to spare even a little bit when he had nothing left#why would they be willing to spare something when he did have something left?#i remember feeling so bad for him as a kid#and yeah. i still do.#he wanted the best for his clan. he wanted them to be safe and happy and healthy#but he was denied that. his entire clan was denied that#and starclan did absolutely nothing#it does make me wonder what was going on up there#i don't remember if any books ever show that#clearly enough of them didn't care#but it does make me wonder what actually happened up there#anyway i really like the part where he renounced starclan. that was super cool#i love it when characters in this series go ''actually FUCK starclan''. or even just doubt them like nightstar did#it's good. i love it#and man cloudstar really just said fuck you to them#and good for him#he deserves to#could he have done more? idk. maybe. but i think it would always end the same way
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the only thing that can save me now is your love
natalie diaz, a brother named gethsemane / tim fedelre, high school musical: the musical: the series / alan watts, what is it like to die / frozen: the broadway musical / x
[ID: black text on a white background. it reads ‘There is no garden. This is my brother and I need a shovel to love him.’
maddox from high school musical: the musical: the series. she is distressed, looking at jet who is off camera. the subtitles read ‘because i’m pretty sure the sibling who is being punished is me.’
black text on a white background. it reads ‘What is childhood like? It's a little like dying, a little like being born. Which is to say, it's nothing you can remember, but you know there was blood.’
jet is talking to ricky, looking slightly uncomfortable. the subtitles read ‘I’ve been a bad guy to her for a long time and it’s eating me up.’
lyrics from the frozen broadway soundtrack. they say ‘Was I a monster from the start? / How did I end up with this frozen heart?’
maddox talking to ricky. in the first frame, she is looking forward, frowning. the subtitles read ‘But we’ve had good days before and...’ . in the second frame, she faces ricky, eyes wide. the subtitles read ‘I just don’t wanna let my guard down and get hurt again, you know?’
lyrics from the frozen broadway soundtrack. they say ‘I can’t be what you expect of me / And I’m not what I seem / But I would love to know you / Is it dangerous to dream?’
maddox clutches a microphone, looking at jet with a soft expression. the subtitles read ‘and I think maybe we’re ready to be happy again.’
black text on a white background. it reads ‘Growing up with a sibling is like being the only people on a stranded boat, constantly figuring out how you can live with them and questioning how you could ever live without them. The only people on a stranded boat. How do you live with them? How could you ever live without them?’. END ID.]
#hsmtmts#maddox hsmtmts#jet hsmtmts#LOOK AT THEM LOOK AT THEM!!!!!!!!#DO YOU NOT THINK ABOUT THEIR DYNAMIC AND WANT TO GO CRAZY#maddox thinks jet existing in the same space as her is her being punished. he intrudes on the only safe and happy place she has#she doesn’t want to get her hopes up. she’s scared of gaining him only to lose him. she doesn’t want him back. she hates him#but she’s her BROTHER. she loves him more than anything and that’s why it hurts so much#and jet hates himself. he never meant to hurt maddox - he didn’t realise he meant so much to her to cause her this much pain#‘no idea you would feel abandoned / you know i would never do that to you’#he hurt his sister and part of him doesn’t want her back. it’s easier to accept he is a bad person beyond redemption. but by god does he+#try to make it up to her. he tries so hard but maddox is hurt and defensive and he recognises that. respects her boundaries.#but maddox wants to be happy again. she wants them both to be happy again.#she asks him can we try again? can we see if we can bridge this gap? i don’t want to lose you forever. i can’t live with you but i can’t+#live without you either.#i absolutely adore their arc this season#and how it mirrors elsa & anna’s#the caption is another frozen ii song that anna sings to elsa :)#they are both lost at sea. they can only save each other
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Very Strong sneaking suspicion that I might have AVPD
#Fits like a glove right down to the fact that PDs are sometimes genetic#My mom; my grandfather; and my grandfather's mother all have/had what my mom calls the ''[family name] Attitude''#And it's just like. ''We are antisocial fucks who pathologically hate being around other people''#''And you're my kid so you should too and so that is one of the many justifications I offer for having forcibly isolated you since Grade 4''#''Stop telling me you're lonely. [Family name]s are supposed to move out into the middle of buttfuck nowhere in the deep woods --#-- with only their spouse as soon as they possibly can and hide there like that until the day they die.''#''I don't care that you're my kid and we can't get to the deep woods I'm just going to let my whole yard overgrow into a jungle and live --#-- here with Only You for the rest of my life anyway. Close enough. You should be happy about this because you are a [family name].''#And the worst part is that the Live In The Woods With Only One Or Two Very Close Loved Ones absolutely DOES sound VERY appealing#It sounds very peaceful and quiet. I DEEPLY miss being able to go to my grandparents' house and just wander alone in the woods for hours.#I damn sure don't want to do it with her though. I do not love her. She has beaten and tortured me throughout my entire life.#.It speaks#.Rua 🦄#AVPD would...explain a lot...#I rehearse every single potential social situation I could end up in in my head EXCESSIVELY to plan exactly how I will get through it...#...and if I feel there is even a SLIGHT chance that something about it will go sour and become embarrassing/painful to me and I can't --#-- plan out how to shut that Potentially VERY TINY Possibility Of Pain down COMPLETELY AND THOROUGHLY then I just. Will not engage.#It's like paralysis. I just can't. It's Not Safe.#I avoid my own EXTREMELY CLOSE FRIENDS like the plague a lot and I feel EXTREMELY GUILTY about it but --#-- the reason I do it is because I don't feel like I'll be adequate enough social company. Not enough spoons to be Uplifting/Entertaining.#I'm afraid I'll just be a mood drain because I don't have enough energy to spare and THAT causes me Crushing Guilt at the notion of --#-- Inflicting My Presence On People. I don't want to get my bad vibes on anyone.#For the most part just the THOUGHT of attempting to engage socially is so nerve-wracking it's exhausting#So that ITSELF eats up all of my spoons.#>I can't engage because I don't have the energy and I don't want to drag anybody else down >The THOUGHT OF ENGAGING takes all of my energy#But I am miserably lonely
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Please, please be considerate of your fat friends' needs and limitations.
Fat bodies are heavy to carry around. I move about the world slower than my thin peers, and I've often had to choose between pushing myself to keep a pace that takes absolutely all my energy, or being left behind, when walking in a group. I don't always feel safe to ask that everyone walk slower, because there's a prevalent idea in society that fat people need to exert themselves as much as possible at all times in the service of weight loss, and that we never "really" need rest, therefore it's a good thing whenever we're exhausted. Fat people and thin people alike are taught that fatness is a flaw, one that fat people ourselves are to blame for, so we're not entitled to any accommodation or consideration.
A friend of mine who is fat recently told me about a dinner party she went to where the chairs were far too small for her and she was sitting very uncomfortably. After the meal she politely suggested moving the party to the couch, but the others didn't want to. She spent another couple of hours in unnecessary pain, and didn't dare tell them about it.
I love my thin friends, but some of them just don't realize that I weigh probably twice as much as them, and yet I balance it all on the same size feet and carry it on about the same size bones. I'm like if they had a whole other them to carry around at all times. Why would that not have an impact on how I function?
Please - take us into consideration when we're part of activities. Ask us which activities work and which don't. Adjust the pace so no one has to be dry heaving and sweating barrels on what's supposed to be a casual walk. Make sure venues have seating that fits us. Make it safe for us to speak up if we need something. When we do, don't treat us like we're the problem.
Finally: yes, we have heard of losing weight. Even those of us who might (and many never will, whether you like it or not), won't do it on a moment's notice. If your response to "fat people deserve accommodations" is "what if they weren't fat though", you're playing a fantasy game. It's pointless. We are fat and we are here and we do partake in society. Work with that.
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“GOOD! NOW PUNCH HIS FACE!”
— when your baby and gojo, geto, nanami, toji, and sukuna get protective over you (f!reader)
a/n: I am alive!! as an apology here is a multi-character post 🙏 btw in toji's part, you're megumi's mom
GOJO SATORU:
two peas in a pod, twins, copies: these are all things people have called your husband and son.
honestly, they’re not wrong. your son has his father’s looks—satoru swears he has your nose and ears but anyway—and he carries the same protectiveness and love he holds for you, if not amplified.
you can’t count on one hand the amount of times the house has been turned upside down because of their fights for a cuddle session with you.
of course, you have always tried suggesting them simply sharing you, but these problem children would rather eat raw zucchini than ever share the cuddle time.
so while your son is barely six, you can still count on him to team up with satoru against anyone who wrongs you in anyway like what’s happening right now for example.
you’re out with your lovely family to buy some groceries, and since they both were whining about getting some sweets, you allowed them to go and snatch a couple from the next aisle.
on the other hand, you stayed to look for another type of detergent to clean the floor—especially since satoru got this new type of paint for s/n and it’s quite an endeavor to remove it with a regular detergent.
however, being in the cleaning supplies section never guaranteed the lack of filthy men who can’t take no for an answer. this one man approaches you, smug grin on his face as he leans on the wall, “what’s a pretty lady like you doing alone?”
“buying groceries like a normal person; now please leave me alone.”
he quickly frowns, “don’t be so stingy doll,” his hand extends towards your arm, “I can show you a good time; I promise—“
the man is swiftly smacked with an egg on his face, and he is left with the egg dripping down his face, “what’s your wrong with your kid, man?!” he yells at the person behind you.
he then grumbles, “ruined a potential good night.”
“my kid was absolutely right in what he did,” you hear satoru’s voice. you then feel a hand on your shoulder, and you’re pulled into a chest you’re all too familiar with, “’toru—“
your husband shoots a small smile your way, pressing a quick kiss to your lips, before looking at his son, “that last throw was very good, s/n! throw another one but just below his stomach."
a cheshire cat-like grin is plastered on your husband’s face as s/n prepares to launch another egg at the man.
there is a very evident scowl on your son’s face as he yells, “don’t you ever bother mama again, you stinky bum crumb!”
the man gasps and tries to make a run for it, but your son wouldn’t be the son of gojo satoru if he doesn’t manage to land the hit exactly where he wants.
the man quickly crumbles to the ground screaming and alerting literally everyone in the store.
so satoru picks both you and s/n and makes a run for it.
you hold tightly onto him, “wait, ‘toru, the groceries!”
“we can always order! saving my princess and son is more important!”
your son grumbles, “but I want to hit the rude man!”
“me too, champ, but—“ satoru sweat-drops and glances behind him, “I doubt the angry security guards would like that!”
GETO SUGURU:
your twin girls are one of the sassiest to exist.
in a way, they take after their father who is also pretty sassy but very low-key.
the sass of all three combined is terrible to be the victim of. luckily for you, they don’t dare direct their triple ray towards you, especially—in any argument—at least one will try to win you over.
if it’s suguru trying to stay on your good side, then he is hugging you from behind, pressing feather-like kisses on your shoulder and whispering about how sweet you are. if it’s the girls, then they cling to your legs and keep yelling about how much they love you.
so it is safe to say that you have a small squad to protect you from any potential “danger”.
“oh my, dear shouldn’t you focus on refining yourself a bit more?” you hear a woman say beside you.
you turn towards her, offended, “excuse me?”
“I mean,” her eyes scan you, disapprovingly, “you look average at best, and with that you won’t be able to find yourself a husband, let alone have children.”
you’re still processing her audacity as she continues, “but then again, it’s probably for the better that you don’t have children; you can barely take care of yourself.”
“can I help you?” your husband says as he approaches the woman.
she smiles condescendingly before chuckling, “I was simply telling this lady to take care of herself more; she hardly looks presentable.”
geto’s smiles tenses up as he is about to give the woman a calm peace of his mind, but his daughters beat him to it.
your older twin stands in front of the woman, scanning her with pure disgust in her eyes.
she grimaces and voices out her thoughts, “you are like a crunchy lizard.”
the woman gasps, “how dare you—!”
you cut off the woman, curious about your daughter’s conclusion, “why a crunchy lizard, sweetheart?”
your daughter looks at you with a small frown, shaking her head, “a crunchy lizard is an ugly sad lizard.”
a snort escapes your husband, and you’re barely able to contain your smile.
your other daughter follows up, looking at her twin sister, “the lady looks like that one green thingy we saw yesterday,” she taps her little foot, trying to remember and beams at the woman, “shrek! you look like shrek!”
then they both glare at her, frowning, “you’re a monkey!”
your husband doesn’t let it go as he deals the final—subtle—blow, “come on now girls; we shouldn’t bully the lady with the mcdonald’s like hairline anymore.”
it seems like the woman can’t take it anymore as she starts sobbing and running to the hills.
a moment of silence is shared across the four of you, before you carry both of your girls in your arms and start tickling them, “I don’t know whether to be proud of you or scold you, little evil girls!”
they squeal, trying to escape your hold and calling for their father.
geto chuckles and wraps his arms around the three of you, “let them have it for tonight, y/n,” he ruffles their hair, “they were brave and defended their mom, after all.”
“yeah, papa is right!”
“yes mama, please!”
you pout then smirk at geto, “well I don’t mind, and since papa is also very proud of you girls, he will buy any toy that you guys want today!”
the color drains from your husband’s face, and he watches motionlessly as his girls latch onto him, screaming about the toys they want.
you giggle at his expression and blow him a kiss. he reluctantly blows you one back, while the girls excitedly pull him towards the toy store.
NANAMI KENTO:
you and your husband were blessed with the sweetest girl as your daughter, and she was just recently joined by another sweet girl.
you can never forget the happiness on your daughter’s face when she saw her baby sister.
it also seems that no matter how many times you give birth, your husband can’t help but get emotional when he holds your baby. his hands are forever delicate as he cradles her to his chest.
you remember what he said during the birth of your first daughter.
“I feel like a piece of heaven has been plucked and placed in my arms.”
the way he always goes soft for the three of you is honestly adorable.
today, you were going on an outing with your—now 6 months old—baby and your older daughter who is almost six.
your husband never brags about his muscular form, but he never misses a chance to carry the baby or the baby supplies.
you have offered to at least carry the bag, but he always refuses, stating that ‘you already carried the baby for nine entire months in your belly; this is the least I can do.’
so yeah, sometimes you wish to smooch your husband till forever, but that’s not the point.
you’re walking hand in hand with your daughter as she sings her favorite song. you hear someone click their tongue, so you look to the side and lock eyes with an old lady. she takes the opportunity and approaches you.
“you should be ashamed of yourself!” she yells pointing at you, “your husband shouldn’t be carrying the baby supplies nor the baby itself for the matter,” she scowls, “that’s your job!”
“with all due respect ma’am, but that isn’t her job, and taking care of the baby should be something we are both responsible for.”
“yeah!” your daughter huffs, “and don’t take out your sad life on my mama!”
your eyes widen as you stare at your daughter.
on the other side, your husband is just as speechless. your daughter pays no one any mind as she continues, “mama works hard every day! you wouldn’t know that! you immature nugget!”
nanami frowns lightly, “d/n, that’s not nice—“
and for the cherry on top, your baby daughter throws the bottle cap she was playing with at the old lady, and frowns at her.
she starts babbling some nonsense that you're pretty sure are curse words in baby language.
having had enough, the old lady huffs, “the utter disrespect,” and starts walking away.
the rest of the spectators’ eyes follow her till she is out of sight. finally then, people start minding their own business, and you and your little family are left to the aftermath.
you giggle, “that was funny.”
“really?!” your daughter beams.
nanami cuts her off, “no,” he then looks at you with a small frown, a sigh escaping his lips, “y/n don’t encourage them—“
your baby daughter screams happily when she sees her sister smile. she starts kicking her feet with the biggest smile on her own face.
your older daughter starts laughing with her and tries to make her little sister laugh more—she was successful.
meanwhile, you chuckle, leaning on your husband’s shoulder, “admit it, kento; it was kind of funny.”
his resolve softens at the sound of laughter from all three of his girls, “okay, maybe a little, but—“
“yay!!”
ladies: 1
kento: 0
FUSHIGURO TOJI:
your husband and son are so alike, save for the part that your husband is a bit more shameless, and your son is more on the shy side.
however, they both have the same bluntness and the tendency to give anyone who they don’t like attitude.
for example, today, you were walking in the park with the both of them to unwind a bit.
not to mention that megumi wanted to walk his dogs which was a plus, since you would be able to watch your dear son play around with them.
it was all going great until you saw an old ‘friend’ who came running at the sight of you. he was someone who has always been way too touchy and in your personal bubble.
you have tried talking to him about it, but you’re confident that he does it to somehow force you into reciprocating the intimacy.
even if you’re a married woman with a freaking kid.
he giddily clasps your hand, “y/n, ‘been a long time!”
“h-hey,” you smile awkwardly.
he laughs, “I was passing by when I saw your figure, and I couldn’t help but come and say hi.”
you nod, “that’s great, but I am busy, so maybe later?—“
“you’ve gotten even prettier!” he exclaims, “I wish you would finally take me out on a—“
“can’t you see that she is uncomfortable?” your son retorts, “also, you should step back; you shouldn’t touch someone like this without asking them.”
megumi squeezes himself between the both you and glares at the man.
the guy was about to reply to your son, but toji pushes him back with ease, pulling you beside him and hand resting on your waist almost by instinct, “kid is right,” he tilts his head a bit, “ever been taught manners or do I have to do the teaching for you?”
the guy is taken back; offended, he snaps “you can’t speak to me like that!”
“and you can’t hold my mom’s hands like that, but here we are,” your son cleverly sasses him.
on the other hand, your—shameless—husband pulls you into one scandalous kiss and smirks at the guy when he pulls back, “and you can’t hit on a married woman, by the way.”
you hear your son gag in disgust at his dad’s actions, but you’re too busy burying your face in your husband’s chest, hoping that the guy disappears before toji makes even more of a bigger scene.
you also hope that the ground would swallow you, but that’s the alternative option.
the guy clutches his fist, before walking away, spewing insults at the sky—since he is too scared to cuss out your buff husband. once the man is out of sight, toji ruffles megumi’s hair, chuckling, “good job, kid.”
your shy bean’s cheeks redden slightly as he looks away, “…thanks.”
you’re still thinking about what just happened when you slap your husband’s chest, “toji, literally why?” you grumble, patting megumi who started holding onto your leg the moment you hugged toji.
“why not,” your husband shrugs with a small smile, taking pride in your flustered form.
“dad, I want ice cream.”
“no, you just want me to let go your mom, so you can hog her for yourself,” toji grumbles, staring down at megumi.
unfaltering, megumi looks up at him ,“dad, I want ice cream.”
“god damn it, listen here you—“
“divine dogs.”
RYOMEN SUKUNA:
there is no denying that both your son and your husband care for you very much, and they both—very aggressively—compete for your attention.
I am talking he literally throws the kid across the room kind of aggressive, and your son, in turn, throws whatever he has at him.
it’s eventful, but you would be lying if you said that it wasn’t one of the reasons why you will get grey hair earlier than everyone else.
so their very aggressive nature is also shown in their protectiveness over you.
a person doesn’t need to insult or even dare flirt with you for your devil duo to make their life a living hell; your husband and son don’t tolerate someone speaking to you if it causes you to ignore both of them.
for example, this one new servant was clueless to where the broom is, and unluckily for him, he saw you sitting with your husband and son in the gardens. he humbly approached you, “excuse me, m’lady.”
you turn to look at him with a smile, “yes?”
he clears throat, a bit flustered by the attention, “I—I wanted to ask where the—“
“up your ass, you disgusting fiend,” your son sneers followed by his father’s ever-permanent scowl.
“who gave you the permission to come and speak to her so casually?” sukuna presses, and the servant quickly falls to his knees.
“m-my apologies, my lord! I did not mean to disturb you!”
sukuna crosses his arms, “well, you did, and you also disturbed your queen and prince,” his eyes narrow at the servant, “what do you have to say for yourself?”
meanwhile, you’re watching all of that, mouth agape and trying to articulate anything to save the poor guy. you finally find your voice, “sukuna, it’s okay; he didn’t mean—“
your son hugs you tightly and glares at the servant, “to think he would so brazenly speak to you like you’re old friends is terrible, mother.”
you can almost see your son’s cursed energy flaring, and you can spot the small smirk on your husband’s face as he watches his son.
before it escalates any further and you find yet another dead corpse in your palace, you pick up your son, kissing his cheek which makes him flustered and causing him to bury his face in your neck.
you look at the servant, “you’re dismissed, and you can ask the head maid about anything you need, okay?”
“y-yes, m’lady!” he, however, stays glued to the ground, “may I have the permission to lift my head?”
sukuna grunts, “sure.”
“thank you, m’lord,” the servant says, before scurrying towards the gate, having secured his freedom after his little mistake.
or at least, that’s what he thought.
your husband slices his legs off with a flick of a finger, and your son, who has inherited his father’s technique, slices the head off.
and so the body falls to the ground, and the other servants hurriedly start cleaning up the mess.
you frown at your husband, “sukuna! he apologized!”
he rolls his eyes, and pulls you by the waist, “do I look like I care? he shouldn’t have interrupted our time together.”
“aww, you’re jealous!”
“no, I am not—“
“hands off, old man!”
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#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#geto x reader#geto suguru x reader#geto x you#nanami x reader#nanami x you#nanami kento x reader#toji x reader#toji x you#toji x y/n#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x y/n#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#geto x y/n#nanami x y/n
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okay i don't have anything smart to add i just genuinely love that these seemingly trivial jokes are actually an important part of his character. we see it throughout the entire manga, how he pushes aside his own frustration and discomfort to accommodate everyone else's and avoid needless confrontation- another example off the top of my head would be the barometz chapter in which he slowly gets frustrated with izutsumi but still tries his best to talk some sense into her calmly and soundly.
and in contrast, there are very few times he expresses his anger and hurt towards others, and it usually takes a lot for him to finally lose his patience and control.
i mean, even with kabru he tried to be polite despite the circumstances until the guy said the one thing that triggers an immense sense of shame, hurt and rage in laios. and you know, the manga does say it quite clearly early on. when we are introduced to namari and then to shuro, laios acts all friendly and shows his respect and trust in them despite how things ended between them, and everyone else gets frustrated with him for acting so strange- why are you the one who tries so hard to pacify the rest when you should be the angriest?
and they don't understand him. they don't know him well enough to be able to understand, but we as readers get to see during the manga that they aren't wrong to question him- he does, in fact, feel all those ugly emotions. and it's when the winged lion finally confronts him that we see to what extent these feelings he buried so deep go, and suddenly all those funny little moments where he sometimes pretends to be mr nice guy speak volumes about his character. honestly, ryoko kui is a master at using jokes in order to define important character traits and this one doesn't fail to amaze me.
and laios's hatred and rage and deep scars he can't get over aren't shown explicitly during most of these moments i mentioned before, but now you realize there are 26 years of emotional baggage to all of them and they sting. he is angry but he can't say shit, what difference would it make? it won't make his friends choose him instead of themselves when he needed them most, and it won't help his party get any farther. of course, this logic doesn't apply to them- they are absolutely allowed to get angry and it's fine to get mad at him, he can take that.
so after finishing the series it's so clear that he tries his best to avoid clashing with others not just due to the current circumstances and him needing to be a reliable leader but also because he knows that people don't even like him when he tries to show his good sides and hide all the rest, so who the hell would tolerate his rage and despair? who would stay after realizing that he is so deeply flawed he doesn't even like his own being?
but he does get mad. he can't help it, and sometimes it gets out of control and now everyone knows. and it's funny, isn't it? that most of those moments ended up bringing him closer to others. shuro admitting he is envy of him and actually becoming the friend laios thought he was all along, fighting for his sake and waiting for him to come back- believing in him even after he turned into a monster and searching for him the way he couldn't bring himself to do for falin when he learned of what became of her- or kabru being pushed to just let it all out because he couldn't bluff his way out of this one and get to laios any other way, so now they are even. they are both horribly honest with each other and they both choose to stay. a weird way of getting to know each other, but it is what it is.
it's simply... the more laios let himself just be, the deeper his relationships grew. and there's intimacy in being your ugly, weak and furious self around someone and them not leaving you. feeling safe enough to let it be known you are hurt and angry. and he knows that now, too.
#he still has a lot of growth to do but at least he has people he can grow with 😭#dungeon meshi#laios touden
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The JJK men’s fav cuddling postitions <3
incl: Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Choso, Sukuna, Toji, Megumi, Yuuji, Yuta
cont: fluff :3, suggestive on Toji’s
note: i think this is my first full fluff fic…lol
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ
Gojo:
I know Gojo absolutely loves every position he can get you both into where you are physically as close as possible. Gojo's infinity is on automatically most of the time, the only touch he receives being from his students occasionally or from you. So when the time comes around for Gojo to be cuddled up with you, he needs to make sure every part of his body is touching some part of you.
I can see him being a fan of face-to-face cuddling, your limbs intertwined with one another, either his or your face pressed into the other's chest, your soft breathing tickling the skin of the other. Maybe something like the 'attack of the sloth' sleeping position. You on your back, Gojo's arms and legs wrapped around yours, leaving you completely enabled, his weight crushing you when you sleep; but you never complain.. well.. sometimes you do, Gojo's body is like a furnace.
Sometimes though, Gojo wants you to spoon him from behind. Of course, he loves it the other way around but theres just something so comforting about your small frame wrapped around his back. He feels so safe in your arms like this. He gets the same feeling one would when they were a kid, afraid of what was lurking in the dark, but the moment they pulled the blanket over their head, they were safe. Gojo felt untouchable, even more so than when he had his infinity on.
Geto:
A classic man, a simple man, a man of taste. I can see Geto loving the pretzel position. Him lying on his back, his toned arm above his head while his other wraps around your frame resting against him. His leg closest to you is bent, enabling you to interlace your leg with his, the appendage thrown over his thigh. He relishes in the feeling of your arm wrapped around his midsection, feeling safe and secure when you tuck you curl your fingers into his t-shirt on the side of his body.
He loves this position because he loves how close to you he feels, he also likes to see the size difference between the two of you when you're scooted down, your head on his chest. Another plus is he can scratch your back gently this way. His hands always find their way under your shirt, gently tickling and scratching the skin of your back, shoulders, and waist. He adores hearing you hum softly into his chest in approval at the relaxing caress.
You love this position for a variety of reasons as well. With your head on his chest, directly placed over his heart, you have free, unlimited access to the soothing rhythm of his softly beating heart, never failing to lull you into a peaceful sleep. You yourself were also guilty of slipping your hand under his shirt to feel up his abs. Running your fingers over the strong indents, counting them carefully in your head over and over, was the same to you as counting sheep. His skin was always so soft and warm, how could you resist?
Nanami:
Nanami's go-to is having you lay fully atop him, your head on the center of his chest, your bodies resting against one another while he strokes your hair. softly running his hands along your head, raking his fingers on the back of your neck, massaging your head, the whole nine yards. Nanami doesn't stop until he hears you lightly snoring on top of him.
Another thing about Nanami--if you drool or snore in your sleep, Nanami thinks it's the cutest thing in the world. You're always so embarrassed when you wake up and see the wet patch on his shirt after you had a particularly deep sleep, but Nanami finds it endearing; it means you felt safe with him, your body fully relaxing and letting go in his presence.
Another favorite is good ol' spooning. Nanami loves to be the big spoon. With both of your jobs as Jujutsu sourcerers, comes harrowing losses and injuries one cannot prevent, no matter how hard they try. So when Nanami gets the opportunity to completely encase your body in his strong, protective arms, it eases his nerves. He is constantly worrying about you, but in this moment he knows, nothing will touch you, nothing will get past his loving embrace.
This position gives Nanami unlimited access to the back of your neck. His lips instantly connecting with the soft skin, pressing soft kisses to the skin there, peppering down your shoulders, his fingers moving your nightshirt out of the way to touch your skin directly--god he loved kissing you. Your skin was so sweet and warm, how was he not supposed to kiss it? It was right in front of him after all.
Choso:
I have said this about Choso countless times, but he is a titty man.. so of course he's going to lay his head on top of your chest. He loves to feel the softness of your breasts agaisnt his cheek--if you have bigger breasts, you better bet he will lay face down and squish your tits around his face, holding his breath while he presses the fat against him, relishing in the feeling of your soft tits on his face.
His hands are without a doubt, on your chest as well. His large, warm hands engulf your tits in his grip, unconsciously feeling you up in his slumber, making you smile and laugh to yourself. He also loves wrapping his arms fully around your body too. The curse nuzzles his head against your chest while he slides his hands under the small of your back, his hands tickling the sides of your waist and back softly with the little mobility he has like this.
He has never felt love like this before, so when he feels your hands wrap around his back like it's the most natural thing in the world, it has his face heating up, a deep crimson blush spreading across his face while you rub his back, your nails raking over his back, over or under the thin material of his shirt. No matter how often the two of you cuddle together like this, he never fails to mumble how much he loves you into your chest, occasionally raising his head to look at you with a pout, still embarrassed even after all the time you spend together.
When you lean forward to press a kiss to his forehead, your fingers caressing his cheek before he drops his head back down to your chest to welcome the embrace of your arms around his body, he swears he's the luckiest man in the world.
Sukuna:
Your wrists and ankles are bound in chains while you sleep at the feet of his throne completely naked. <3
Toji:
I can see Toji being a fan of the 'pretzel' as well, same as Suguru. He gets a little more handsy most times, the hand he has wrapped around your back will creep down to the waistline of your night shorts. His thick fingers slip underneath the waistband, sliding under the band of your underwear as well as he grips as handful of your ass, massaging the fat in his hand, squeezing and rubbing it with his fingers.
At first, he did it as a way to tease you, and it worked, you always lifted your head to give him a stern look while he continued to massage the skin. Over time though, It became a comfort thing for the both of you. Whenever you're tired but Toji isn't, he'll turn down the volume of the TV in your shared bedroom and let you get comfortable on his chest, your ear resting where his arm and torso meet. He slides his arm around your frame, smiling to himself when you nuzzle and cozy up to him, his hand sliding down your back, rubbing up and down a couple times while you get situated.
When you get yourself to your desired position, throwing your leg over his hip; which meets his hand as he grabs it and pulls you over his pelvis more, caressing the side of your thigh soothingly; he slides his fingers into your underwear and stares groping you, his warm hands bringing you instant comfort, and familiarity. He'll continue to absentmindedly feel you up while he watches his show, his eyes occasionally darting down to look at you with softness in his eyes before he leans forward to press a kiss to the top of your head, drifting off soon after, leaving the TV running all night, as usual.
Megumi:
I imagine Megumi being super touchy with his significant other in private once he gets comfortable with you, but I still see him being a little awkward and shy about cuddling with you. It's so intimate after all. The two of you probably started with you lying on his chest with your hand resting on his tummy, you would have to make the first move because Megumi would rather die than initiate something like that at first, no matter how badly his body was itching to feel your warmth against him.
His body would go completely rigid when you laid on him out of nowhere. Megumi would hold his breath, not daring to move even in inches in fear you would move off of him. The weight of your head and your hand that was softly rubbing his tummy felt so comforting, although it did make goosebumps rise all over his body in shock. You would have to tip your head down to avoid him seeing your smile from hearing his heartbeat race out of his chest, the organ taking a significant amount of time before he gets used to your embrace, the rhythm slowing.
After a while of being together and countless cuddling sessions, I can see Megumi being more confident in initiating cuddle sessions when the two of you are watching TV or getting ready to go to sleep. His favorite positions are all of you cuddling him. You spooning him, him lying on your chest while his legs intertwine with yours--any position where your hands are wrapped around him and constantly caressing him in some way he is a huge fan of.
He also loves listening to your heartbeat. He didnt understand how you were always so calm, the soft lulling rhythm never failing to take him away to dreamland. He felt like he was going to have a heart attack every time you even smiled at him, but that was one of the things he loved about you--someone had to initiate the intimacy in the relationship and it sure as hell wasn't going to be him. If you weren't so forward, it probably would've taken him a year to even hold your hand on his own, so he was grateful you were more forward and verbal with what you wanted, because internally, he wanted the same as you, it just took a little coaxing to get him there.
Yuuij:
Yuuji has no preference! He loves each and every position, he just loves to cuddle with you. If he could always be touching you in some way, he would, and he sure as hell tries. You want to lay on his chest while he rubs your back? done. You want to spoon his large frame and wrap your leg over his waist while his fingers tickle your calf? done. Yuuji is ready for each and every cuddle position you propose to him, and he is not afraid in the slightest to initiate the cuddle sessions either.
I think Yuuji would find great joy in lifting your shirt up and crawling inside as much as his body could fit. His head resting on the soft skin of your tummy while your shirt blocks out most of the light emanating from the TV. "It feels like I'm a baby again." He would say, holding your hips in his hands on the outside of your shirt, his fingers tickling unconsciously along your sides, making you giggle.
I think Yuuji would really like coming home exhausted from training to sit in your lap and lay his head on your shoulder, his back arching slightly from the height difference between the two of you. He would hum into the crook of your neck while you stroked his back, raking your nails along him. He would smile to himself and close his eyes when you lift his shirt, scratching his warm skin directly while he falls asleep on your lap for a midday nap.
He was quite heavy and you're unable to breathe very well while he sleeps, but luckily he never naps long, and you do admit his weight crushing you felt weirdly nice, along with the ticklish puffs of his breath against your neck--it makes you feel close to him.
Yuta:
Yuta is a big baby. He handles enough in the Jujutsu world, trying to keep up his tough, strong persona while fighting, all he really wants when he comes to you is to relax completely in your embrace. Another man who loves it when you cuddle him from behind. He loves feeling your leg wrap over his waist, he knows he's not small, but he loves to feel like it sometimes, it's comforting.
One of his favorite positions to cuddle with you during the day is his head on your tummy/pelvis, his hands stroking along the length of your waist while you tangle your hands in his hair, running your nails over his sensitive scalp, down the back of his neck, reaching as much of his back as you can. It lulls him right to sleep, and he loves it. I think Yuta would struggle with falling asleep/sleeping through the night from insomnia, but when you're touching him, your warm embrace engulfing his body, he almost forgets about all the sleepless nights he spent without you by his side.
I can also see him loving to cuddle while facing you. Your head in his chest while he wraps his arms around you, and you likewise. Your legs tangled together, your bodies pressed as close as possible. During the summertime, this position is not the most comfortable because of the heat and the somehow awful AC Jujutsu high has. So during the colder months, the two of you constantly find yourselves in this position. He keeps his hand pressed snugly to the back of your neck, making sure your forehead stays pressed to his neck at all times.
#jjk fluff#megumi fluff#jjk megumi#megumi x reader#itadori fluff#yuji fluff#yuuji fluff#yuuji x reader#itadori x reader#gojo fluff#nanami fluff#geto fluff#choso fluff#toji fluff#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen choso#jjk crack#jjk toji#jjk gojo#gojo satoru x reader#gojou x reader#choso x y/n#choso x reader#nanami x reader#sukuna smut#sukuna fluff#yuta fluff#yuta x reader#yuta okkotsu
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how about Jason with the prompt "text me when you get home"? the one time they forget/fall asleep before sending the text and Jay loses hid mind. rushes over expecting them to be dead but they passed out on the couch as soon as they got home
really superbly SCRUMPTIOUS prompt Aud. I love protective jaybird 🥰‼️ thanks for sending something in 🫶
jason todd x gn!reader. worried protective snuggly jason. no warnings really, ya boy is just paranoid and madly in love with you 💓
request something! I rb all fics to @sanguinelibrary
****
As soon as you get out of your last class of the day, your phone rings.
You answer it, wedging the phone between your ear and shoulder as you fish in your bag for a couple of bills. You're already walking to the train station.
"Hi, snookie bear," you say into the phone, slightly delirious with hunger and sleep deprivation.
Jason snorts on the other end. "That's a new one. Hey, baby. Y'heading home?"
"Indeed I am."
"Need a ride?"
You wait and listen. Eventually, you hear the sounds of hitting and grunting in the background. You roll your eyes—only Jason would be in the middle of a fight and then ask if you need a ride home.
"No, I'm okay. It's not dark yet. Plus you sound busy."
"I'm never too busy for you," he says immediately. "And it's gonna get dark in an hour. Are you sure—"
"Yes, Jay," you say gently. "I'm sure. Don't worry about me. I'm going straight home."
You're already at the station. There's a good amount of people, students and workers alike. The university is in a relatively okay part of town, especially during the day. You're not worried. It's not like you traipse through Crime Alley on your downtime.
"Okay." Jason takes a deep breath. "Just—just be careful. Text me when you get home."
You note the hint of worry in his tone. Maybe this week has been particularly saturated with crime. Jason tends to get a little overbearing about your safety when he's had a tough week. You know he had go down to Blüdhaven and help his brother—with what specifically, you don't know.
Most of the time, you're sure you don't want to know.
"I always do," you say. The train pulls up to the station. "Ooh, train's here! I'll talk to you later. I'm thinking of ordering takeout. Too tired to cook."
"Okay, sweetheart. Be safe. Love you. Lock your door."
You roll your eyes fondly. "Yes, Jay. Love you too. Bye."
You hang up as you step onto the train. You pull your headphones out of your bag and shut your brain off during the ride. By the time you get off the train, you've lost hope that you'll be doing any work tonight. You're absolutely wiped out after three back-to-back classes.
It's still light when you get home. You lock the door after you get in, the habit ingrained into you, and dump your bag onto the couch.
Takeout is a no-go. You're hungry now and about thirty seconds away from passing out on the couch.
You change into your home clothes, eat a granola bar, and call it a day. You'll eat more later.
You turn off your phone to bar any annoying notifications and fall into bed, eyes closing immediately.
****
The sound of your deadbolt being teared off its chain wakes you up. You flinch and jump awake, trying to blink through sleep. Your mouth is dry from how hard you slept, and your eyesight is slightly blurry from the sudden flood of moisture.
Your bedroom door swings open, and suddenly you're pulled into warm, heavily muscled arms. You hug back on instinct; you'd know the feel of your boyfriend anywhere.
"Jay, h—"
"You didn't text," he says, voice shaking. "You said you would. I was—I thought you were—"
You tense, guilt knocking into you.
"Shit. Jason, I'm so sorry. I meant to, I was just so tired..."
Jason pulls back to look at you, hands still on your shoulders. His expression is stern.
"I'm gonna pick you up from now on. When are your late days?"
"Jay, no, GCU is across town. You can't possibly pick me up three days a week. That's too much! What about patrol?"
"Somebody else is out at this time," he says stonily. "Crime Alley can wait an hour while I get you home."
His eyes blaze green, a side effect of the Pit. You can tell he's putting every effort into keeping a lid on the worry and fear and anger over your silence.
"Jason." You cup his face. "Honey, I'm safe. I'm sorry I didn't text you. I'm sorry I worried you. But your adrenaline is spiked right now, Jay. Everything feels magnified. I don't need to be picked up. I was perfectly safe coming home. Okay?"
He shakes his head, holding your wrists. "Anything could've happened. I was so—fuck, baby, I was so scared. I-I checked the station footage and the traffic cams, and I didn't see you after you cut through the park, and I thought—I was sure you'd—"
Jason pulls your arms around his neck and buries his face into your shoulder. He supports you by the backs of your thighs, tugging you into his lap. Then he clings tight.
"Oh, Jay," you murmur, petting his curls. "I'm alright. This end of Gotham isn't so bad. And I know you'd have found me even if something had happened. But nothing did."
"Can't lose you," he chokes out.
"You won't lose me, honey," you say. "You keep me safe."
He trembles in your embrace. You kiss the shell of his ear and continue to pet his hair.
"Let me pick you up tomorrow, at least," he pleads. "We'll get dumplings at that place you like. You barely ate anything when you came home."
"Okay, Jay," you say, because you know he needs that reassurance. He won't relax without it. "That sounds good."
You keep stroking his hair. "Y'wanna order in now?"
"In a minute."
Jason lays you both down on the bed. He throws a leg over yours and pulls you into his chest. It's now that you see just how much tension is locked in his shoulders. He's exhausted.
"Jus' wanna hold you for a bit," he says, lips resting on your shoulder.
He's drowsy, the adrenaline finally ebbing. You close your eyes and snuggle into his arms.
"You can hold me for as long as you want," you say, threading your fingers with his. "I'm not going anywhere."
#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#jason todd x y/n#jason todd fanfiction#red hood x reader#red hood x you#red hood fanfiction#batman fanfiction#dc fanfiction#inbox#blurb
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we do not talk enough about the moment right before crowley puts his sunglasses back on. the "nothing lasts forever" is devastating and if you're like me your eyes were so full of tears you couldn't see the screen the first time you watched it (just like crowley, look at us all twinning in sadness!).
there is a shift that happens in his eyes and i think it is absolutely fascinating and heartbreaking at the same time.
we begin with crowley averting his gaze from aziraphale's face and staring off into the distance instead, and you can see his spirit break. that crowley just lost the one thing in the world he cannot live without and we can see it written across his face like a neon sign.
then, as you'd expect, he gives into the need to cover up his pain, to try and make himself less vulnerable, and even before he lifts his glasses he looks down so aziraphale can no longer see his eyes.
now, the next part is what would not let me out of its grasp all day. we know it happens because of his demeanour afterwards and up until the kiss, but you can actually watch as crowley makes himself numb to the world.
i am intimately familiar with dissociation as a trauma and stress response, and while you can never fully control it, you do eventually find the switch in your mind that makes you snap back into the haze. crowley has had six thousand years to get really, really good at leaving reality behind when he needs and/or wants to.
that's exactly what he does.
he still looks sad, and yet there's just something distinctly distant in his eyes, the shift from openly heartbroken to "i don't want to feel any of this let me leave".
glasses? on
emotions? off
hotel? trivago
i have stared at those four frames more than any person probably should and i don't know if it's the light, if i am going insane, or if there is a single tear sliding out of his right (our left) eye. i'm probably insane and the light is a bitch so if anyone has some high resolution shots or anything that could answer that question without a doubt PLEASE do add it.
by now you are probably ready to threaten me with a knife in a dark alley but before you do that or drive your car off a cliff, let me tell you the best part:
aziraphale notices.
they might be communicating on two different frequencies but aziraphale knows crowley. he knows and loves him, and, most importantly, over the last few years he has gotten used to seeing crowley without his glasses. aziraphale could probably write a book on the expressions in his eyes alone and watches that shift happen and is devastated.
look.
he tries to make himself hope the same second, tries to convince himself crowley is putting on his glasses so they can leave together, but he knows.
aziraphale sees the light leave crowley's eyes, sees crowley leave, knowing that he is quite literally running away from him. you and me against the world, angel, but in that moment crowley firmly pushes him back to "the world" (or tries to, anyway).
the entire season we see crowley take off his glasses whenever he enters the bookshop to the point where he's running around without them on in broad daylight with jimbriel right there.
can you imagine how hurt and confused aziraphale must be?
because what crowley is telling him, if we really, really break it down, is that aziraphale is no longer a safe person for him. and repairing that trust is going to take time and work, no matter how much crowley loves him, how badly they love and need each other.
anyway to seal this off and really rub in the pain - how it started vs. how it ended. <3
oh one last thing: now crowley no longer has a single person he can be himself around, no one that knows him, no one he trusts. no one in whose presence he can take his glasses off.
and outside of the bentley and his own flat, he no longer has a place to do so either. the bookshop was theirs. with aziraphale gone, is it really a safe place anymore? is it somewhere he can just let himself be knowing he will be looked after and protected?
easy answer: no.
alright, off i go. see y'all on the next angst post or in the tags.
#alex talks good omens#good omens#ineffable husbands#crowley#aziraphale#good omens season 2#go2#aziracrow#crowley x aziraphale#ineffable divorce#the final fifteen#good omens meta
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