#and so much shit happend today and i had to deal with it all .... like how does my boss do ti
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Hii Petri, I want to request for headcanons please, it's maze runner boys x fem!reader and she was one of the first to go up in the box, she's been in the glade for enough time to pass for the transition of 'cute little girl who's happend to be there with a lot of boys' to 'really hot girl in the middle of tons os guys', and I want to see the moment that clicked for each one of them that "oh, she's a girl". I think it would be fun cause they're a bunch of virgin dudes stuck in a place with only one girl that they know since "forever" and then suddenly she's not that little kid anymore and it clicks that they'd could be the one to date her.
I am completely doing my requests out of order, but I really like this idea and headcanons are so much easier lol.
Also no Newt here, the boy likes men.
DEVELOPMENT
MASTERLIST | MULTI-CHARACTER MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: See above. Movie based fic.
WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, awkward teenage boys, you're the boss, everyone is useless, mild suggestive themes, the Thomas one is really bad 'cause I had no way of actually writing that based on this prompt.
You were the first person in the Glade, a young girl with no memories or idea what you were doing. Yet, somehow, you managed to survive for a whole month on your own. Then, one after another, the boys started joining you. And you went from soft girl to a leader they could rely on - though, it takes them a bit to notice this.
THOMAS
Being one of the later arrivals to the Glade, Thomas doesn't have the same reaction the others do.
You're just a badass from day one to him.
He thinks you're cool and calculated and you seem to know what you're doing.
He respects you from day one.
He doesn't get to have the whole realising you're cool moment that everyone else does.
He just thinks you're sick.
And he's like, stressed as shit, so he doesn't really have the time to think otherwise.
MINHO
Now, this is where it gets interesting.
Minho was one of the first boys to follow you into the Maze, just after Alby and Newt.
So he's witnessed your whole transformation.
From the early days of exploring the Maze together, to you making him Keeper, to the drunken nights where he'd had a rough day and you had to drag him to bed.
You've been together through thick and thin.
And some of Minho's confidence has definitely rubbed off on you.
The moment where Minho realised you were in face a girl, and not the one he first met was actually quite simple.
You'd had a long night, and with one of your Runners out of commission, you realised you hadn't told Minho to cover another route that day as you'd made arrangements for a new Runner to do a more simpler route- which meant switching up everyone's routines.
Fresh out of bed, wearing a sports bra and baggy trousers that hung off your hips, you went to the Map Room.
It wasn't uncommon for you to dress like this. The Glade is warm, and you basically mothered all these boys.
You whistled as you entered, gaining their attention.
"Oi, boys, listen up - I'm switching routes around today. With Sam off on sick and Darren being new, he's taking the easiest route. Minho, I need you to deal with covering the outer sections more. And Ben I need you to stick to your path for a change instead of going awol - your maps make no sense."
"Aw, what? But that's boring."
"I ain't shuckin' askin', Ben - do as you're told."
Oh.
Oh God.
Minho doesn't know why this is what made it click.
His eyes fell on your body, your words becoming static as he drunk in your figure.
Had you always been this attractive?
Had you always been this assertive?
Was Minho into dominant women?
Should he be concerned?
After this point onwards, Minho started looking at you differently.
In fact, you became the only thing he couldn't take his eyes off.
Minho would go from your confident and reliant friend to slightly awkward, but also occasionally flirty.
Like he can't actually decide what to do with you now.
It'd take a while, but after some near death experiences, he'd become more outwardly flirtatious.
Though, he still wouldn't be able to get over the admiration and awe for you.
GALLY
Gally would be your number one problem child in the Glade.
He always has been.
But, you normally left Alby or Newt to deal with him.
Especially at the start since he's a big dude with a big temper.
Gally always saw you unfit as a leader.
Too timid, quiet, anxious.
You name it, he thought it.
That was until the day him and Minho got in a particularly nasty fight.
You don't know why or what it was, but Gally had gone for the Runner. Alby was busy sorting out the Maps, and in light of Newt's recent injury - it was left up to you.
Jeff came running into your hut, panicking about the fight, leading you to running out after him.
"That's enough!"
You grabbed the boys, yanking Gally away by his collar.
"The shuck do you slintheads think you're doing?"
"He started it!"
"I did not!"
You'd had a hard day.
You didn't need this.
"I don't give two klunks who started it! We ain't got much choice to act like adults 'round here - and you two are actin' like diaper-klunkin' sissy babies! Get a shuckin' grip! I expect better."
Minho apologised quickly.
Gally did not.
"What? Why should I apologise when this shank can't shut his mouth?"
Well, you weren't having that.
"Because I shucking told you to. You're under my care and my order- what I say goes. You may be a Keeper, but that's up to me. Suck it up and do as you're told."
"...sorry.
"Better. Get back to work."
The way that Gally watched you walk away made it obvious to everyone who witnessed the scene that something had changed.
He'd always seen you as weak and a pointless leader, but now?
You'd put him in his place.
Initially, he was embarrassed.
But then he started seeing everything around the Glade, the power you actually held.
He also started to notice how attractive you actually had become.
Safe to say, he started to feel things after you basically called him a bitch.
He'd start showing you more respect after that.
Maybe a bit more than respect.
FRYPAN
Frypan has always liked you.
He's always respected you and been a good friend.
And he used to make sure that you were okay when things got too much.
But as you got older and more confident, you started to not need that comfort as much.
Unlike the others, there wouldn't be a specific moment where he realised.
He'd just be proud as he watched you grow as a person.
And you'd take charge.
It'd be a slow burn of feelings from friendship to genuinely having a crush on you.
You'd make sure his kitchen is always stocked and the Track-hoes do their job and the vegetables are up to scratch.
Though, his feelings came more with the physical transformation side of things.
You hit puberty, and went from being awkward to confident along with it.
Now, Frypan is probably one of the more respectful guys around.
But he can't help but stare when you bend over, or stretch or even just look at him with a smirk.
He's a teenage boy and you're the only girl around.
He's trying his best.
Though he did go from:
"Hey, everything okay? You look stressed."
To:
"H-hey uh, you uh, you need help, or...?"
Man's is down bad.
ALBY
Alby would probably be the person you're closest to.
He's the mouth and the power to your brain
You basically work side by side.
But, he'd always see you as someone he needed to look after and protect.
Then, as you grew up, came into yourself, that would change.
Especially when you started actually being in charge.
For the most part, he really doesn't care.
He noticed the others starting to act differently, but he didn't change much.
Apart from that one time you'd just come out of the shower.
And he just couldn't take his eyes off you.
And he kinda realised you're a woman.
But apart from that.
He's just... there.
Helping you lead.
Sorry for disappearing, this is not my best work but I am currently in full corpse mode.
Anyway, hope you enjoyed :))
#🌿 petri writes tmr#🌿 petri writes#🍃 petri tmr#tmr fanfiction#tmr imagines#tmr minho#minho the maze runner#the maze runner#thomas the maze runner#tmr frypan#alby maze runner#tmr alby
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BOYS GON SOFT
Henry Bowers
Henry develops a crush on a very sparky girl, and everyone can see how soft he's gone, but him.
Black!Fem Reader
Tw: mention of sexual assault,
Henry Bowers has always been aggressive & violent. And those who did get into his pants knew he's wasn’t there for, commitment or a meaningful relationship.
He's never cared about that stuff…Well never until he met you.
For weeks he told himself he didn't like you, over and over how could he fall for a loser like you.
But the day you accidentally bumped into Patrick hocksetter and he nearly murdered his best friend. He knew.
He knew he was in deep, deep, deep deepdeepdeep shit.
YOU! (first person)
I Knew I was a freak, a fucking loser. Nothing but a Pusey bag to fuck and a whore to look at. I mean I wouldn't be suprised. And I’m not.
I've been played more times then I have fingers. I've been bullied, degraded, Abused and sexually assaulted for as long as I've been in derry mein. And I've been here my whole life. I don’t really know why I’m treated like this. Maybe it’s because of my skin color, anyone here that’s not 100% Caucasian is considered a slur. Or maybe it’s the roomers Greta Keen Spread About me in the 5th grade, about how I shagged the whole Baseball-team.
Which is absurd for someone who was my age and not even the teachers believed me. And none of the players denied the claims, only making my hatred burn brighter.
It wasn't until Monday. June 2nd, when I was having the shitist day of my entire fucking life, that I realized how much of a fuck up I really was.
I had just gotten into an argument with my so called father about how much of a so called slut I was. When in reality the most I've done is kissed a guy. Not even that. My father had accused me of sneaking out and stealing his liquor, accusing me of getting pregnant and aborting the baby. Telling me I’m the reason my mother left…when in reality he’s the reason bc he’s a two face back stabbing man whore alcoholic fuck up father.
And on top of that, I had just started my period, so I was in immense pain. And on FUCKING TOP OF ALL THAT. I just HAD to be a cluz and bump into the Patrick Hocksetter. Derry's very own Psychic Most likely 98% murderer. But somthing weird happend.
I was left alive and defended by his best friend, Henry fucking bowers.
I don't know what was weirder.
The clown I saw that day, or Being defended by the Henry bowers. Either way. They both caught me off guard.
3rd person pov: Monday, 6.2.81
"Well FUCK YOU DAD"
The girl screamed at her self proclaimed Father. But she liked to call him a wannabe dad behind his back.
"Just fucking wait till you get ho–"
She didn't even let him finish his sentence, she cut him off with the car door, slamming it in his face, gripping her backpack straps closer to her shoulder as she made her way into the school clutching her aching stomach.
She would deal with her father later.
She was not in the mood, she was more bitchy then usual today and on top of her bitch ass father she had to deal with. She had to deal with her period, which caused loads of unnecessary stress and pain.
She walked into the school, avoiding the sweaty teens and horny boys cat calling her everywhere she went. Curse that stupid fucking roomer.
She scoffed as she took out her walkmen she got a few Christmases back and pulled the headphones over her head. She looked down at her walkmen re winding the tape finding her favorite stress relapsing song. Her head stayed down for a few seconds. That was her first mistake.
The song didn't even play for 10 seconds before her headphones were knocked off her head and she was knocked to the floor.
She groned and looked up about to go off but stopped out of fear as she was faced with the back of the Patrick HOCKSTETTER.
His back was slumped and his knives that he always carried around was a skew on the floor.
She scooted back scrambling to her feet as quickly as possible.
She was about to start apologizing when she was Grabbed harshly by the neck. The gasps around them went unnoticed by the captured Girl. His grip grew tighter as he raised his head.
She griped the wrists that held onto her attempting to pull them off.
She raised her head to face Patrick’s seething one, right in-front of hers. His hot breath came in contact with her nostrils and she tried hard not to gag at his horrid breath and his stench taking over her face.
"You got a death wish, Slut?" He spat out lowly, so only she could hear.
She out of pure fear and stun didn't anwser him. Second mistake.
She was like a deer caught in headlights, to afraid to move or speak. She would've snapped back with something snarky, but as much as she hated her life. This was one of the worse ways to die.
He shook the girl, hitting her head on the wall once more. She let out a loud grone. That was definitely going to hurt later.
"Anwser me Whore!" He spoke loudly catching the attention of the other kids in the hall way who stared out of fear FOR the small girl he had got this time.
When she didn't anwser he got upset. He cocked his fist back and started for her face. She clenched her eyes shut and flinched back making an attempt to protect herself. But it was useless.
‘ Patrick hocksetter was going to beat me to death.’ She prepared for the hurt but it never came.
She kept her eyes closed as she was relased and placed gently back on her feet.
She slowly opened her eyes to find Patrick at knife point by his best friend, Henry Bowers.
Through her loud and fidget breaths she couldn't pick up any words they exchanged, all she could hear was the ending of his sentence.
"–ch her again, and You're Dead."
She was stunned.
‘ was he talking about me ? He couldn't be. Of course he was talking about me stupid ! ‘
Henry dropped his best friend and threw the knife to the ground with a huff, he spun around glaring at everyone and anything, they all restored back to what they were doing before, not wanting to risk getting beat to death by bowers.
The girl stayed in her spot, stunned at what just happened. Her life was just saved…by Him?..
She hadn’t noticed he was right in-front of her until he spoke.
“Hey? You okay Doll?”
She snapped out of her trance and gulped fearfully, she quickly spoke up not wanting to anger him. She was in too much of a daze to be in her sparky attitude. She was all together still stunned, her Sas had been put on pause
“Oh Yes..Yes I am..” speaking to him was…much more easier then she imagined..he’s more calm and he’s actually speaking to her without calling her any sorts of derogatory remarks.
He smiled a little bit and Her heart did a back flip. She stared at his smile and couldn’t help but smile back.
He moved closer and out of instinct her smile vanished and she moved backwards. Could he blame her.
His face dropped and she thought she has angered him. She shook in her spot as she let out a shaky sigh. She moved closer to him and stood infront of him.
“I’m sorry if I upset you, I…I just don’t like…I don’t like being close to anyone. Not just you. It’s a social thing…”
She explained carefully. She wasn’t lying to him, and he knew that too. She hated being close to people. She hated contact with anyone and she preferred being 6 feet at all times.
He had no idea why she was being so considerate today, usually when he would hear her and see she was yelling, screaming and beating people up and being her sparky self…maybe she was sick.
He smiled again and chuckled. “It’s alright princess, you ain’t hurt my feelings. I ain’t a sissy.”
Now it was her turn to smirk, “huh, I would’ve never guessed”
‘ there she is ‘ he thought with a grin.
He laughed and got up close to her, this time she didn’t move. He leaned down to her face and smirked, he pushed her a bit and she stumbled back with a laugh.
That very laugh made Henry Stop in his tracks to just admire. Stop to admire. Just stop. To admire Her.
Something he has never in his life ever done before. He had no idea what this feeling was, but in a way he despised it, he hated it with a burning ember. But In another way it was like a drug, an addiction he didn’t want to get rid of, a bug that sound like a fly but looks nothing less then a butterfly.
He scoffed before walking away.
“Hey!” She called after him.
But he didn’t stop to respond, he just held up the bird and went on, still with that giddy Smirk on his face.
She smiled with a laugh and turned around to pick up her walk men. She put it on and switched on her music.
She strutted down the hall way, unaware she had just gained protection from the biggest storm in Derry.
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Hello, i'm cheese anon's evil (not really) alter ego, theorist anon and i've come here to tell you my theory or uhh... actually personal hc of what happend to bruno (headcanons are like theorys but less fancy shut >:[), (i tweaked it a bit to fit your context just a tad better as i have some ideas with how you portrayed bruno (or well part of him))
SO. First of all i have to say i liked the uniform you gave bruno, very cute tbh, but more than pizzeria it's giving ice cream or candy shop thb, not that is a bad thing just saying so uhh fuck it pizzeria no more he runs an ice cream shop now in me mind
OK WITH THAT OUT THE WAY NOW WE FR THIS TIME.
Ok so. Once upon a time this italian guy called Bruno runed an ice cream shop with his wife, pizzahead saw how succesful they were on their own and said "shiiid imma need that" so he made a deal with the happy couple. BUT then he tried to bribe and trick them into giving up pretty much all rights to uhh.. i don't have a name for the ice cream shop actually lmao, just think of amything. anyways, they said no bc the ice cream shop was something they hold very dear to them, they have been saving for this for literal years and risked it all to get it running so who would want to give it all out like that really? But pisshead can't accept a no for an answer so what did he did? He just killed them in the spot. If they aren't gonna sing these papers might as well just kill the guys so they stop growing you know? He cannot afford ANY sort of competition (even tho he sells horrible pizzas and they are a fucking ice cream shop). But then he realizes "shit i fucked up imma get sued" so he just tried to recreate bruno using his brain as a base, couldn't replicate the wife tho, he accidentally shot her in the brain without thinking he would have to clone her too oops.
Anyways they go thru the cloning process but uh oh the clone isn't perfect, guy doesn't even remember who he was. The solution? Lie that they sold their shop and flew out the country with the money without telling anyone, aslo they changed their numbers you cannot find them ^-^. Btw the shop closed down literal months after he "acquired" the shop, the ice cream was bad it tasted like pizza :(.
That gets us to today, pizzahead now found some new guy to torment and since he had the clone laying around he just kind of managed to make it change looks so it can look like peppino and then used them as a boss on his tower.
Ok i'm done talking :] hope you like this mess of a theory imma go, cheese bitch wants to take control again mkay bye was a plessure to speak to ya'll <3
(Ohohoho, Theorist Anon! What a delight to read!
I cannot confirm nor deny your theory, but I will say that part of it is pretty spot-on! And it's generally an interesting story regardless!
Just some silly and goofy pizza man absolutely snapping and killing a couple bc he's a jealous bitch, and then he goes 'whoopsie daisy' and remakes one of them, and uses them to torment another guy??? Incredible
If dear Cheese Anon allows you to return, I'd love to read any more theories you have! (And I will continue to smugly grin as I do not confirm nor deny them)
ALSO, I totally get the ice cream shop vibes from the outfit, not intentional, but it is very funny to imagine Pizzahead taking over a non-pizza related place and making bad pizzas or pizza-flavoured ice cream!
Who knows! Maybe the tower warped Bruno's Ice Cream to Bruno's Pizza, bc it is Pizza tower and not Ice Cream tower hehe
Also, Pep does love ice cream, but that's maybe unrelated!)
#ooc post#I'm gonna make a theory tag so I can read them later hehe#theory post#but fr this was a fun read!!!#so thank you for spilling your thoughts <3#also did I basically draw Pep doing the same thing as the previous post?#yes! but he deserves all the treats!!!#also cw tags!#death //#death mention //#guns //#you didn't say gun but it was implied so just in case
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OKAY, LET'S GET UNCOMFY ! Feel free to ignore as many, (or all!)as you want. 21 / 30 / 62 / 77 /83
Thank you,
I'll put this under a cut because there will be mention of a suicide attempt, mention of drug addiction, implied death, adult themes and just in general sensitive stuff.
Either proceed with caution or just simply skip it, you are not missing out on anything.
21. Have you ever had to hurt anyone emotionally?
This one is interesting because the question implies that it was intentional and no other option but to hurt the person. I think i only had one of these. I mean did hurt people but not exactly because i had to.. So when a friend of mine called me in the middle of the night i had to actually bully her out of suicide. Which was a desperste last resort because i had no idea what to do. Nothing i said seemed to work so in the end i opted for a low blow and started talking shit about the only person she would have been sad to leave alone. The vague idea was that if i can piss her off enough, her mind will be directed away from the razor in her hand. To this day i cannot fathom it actually worked.
30. Who have you never forgiven? Why?
I could say may father but that would not be entirely true true. I mean i wouldn't say i forgave him but i don't hold a grudge against him anymore.
I could say the local dealer who was the reason a friend of mine got hooked and eventually OD-d. But i know why he was dealing and i can hardly hold it agains him.
But i can say myself. Me not being kind to myself in genral, is not attention or sympathy garnering. I genuinly been awful as fuck to a number of people. And not all can be written off as being simply "young and stupid" even if a few years has passed since. But things were said, stuff happend, connections destroyed and there is no going back. I know having resentment towards myself is not changing any of that, but it helps me stay grounded in a way.
62. Do you wish you could start tomorrow with a clean slate? Why/why not?
As a tought exercise i'd entertain the idea of a clean slate but if i'm honest.. I would not start over. As much as the shitty parts sucked and how many fuckups i made along the way, without them i would not be who i am today. And i know i say i don't really like myself but it is who i am. I wouldn't want to change that, because i don't know how to be anything else. It wouldn't be me. Besides, starting over when i'm just starting to accept all my flaws and shortcomings and admit that i am human at the end of the day would feel like cheap way out.
77. What’s your kink?
This is a funky one for me because i really don't have a healthy relationship with sex at all. But i don't think i have any unusual kinks. Tho i am also a control freak and not in a cute way when it comes to it. And that has some build in innate need for control and all. So that's definitely there..
83. Do you like when people guess how you’re feeling?
It depends but i'm not really fond of preconcieved assumptions when you have the choice to just.. ask. I'm not completely sure why but people jut always assume i'm programmed to be negative, dismissive, nitpicky and in general passive aggressive about everything which is just not true. I might be a complete fuckup of a wet cat in human disguise in general but that doesn't mean i don't care. People tend to forget that i'm basically an excited plankton floating around in awe of the world, if we consider the actual capacity of my brainpower on a daily basis.
#sorry for taking this long#i kinda fell asleep while typing this and than life happend and work and all#levynn answers#moonchild-in-blue#ask game
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long ass messy explaining of today:
well he hit/choked my mom for just trying get our stuff to leave like he had a tantrum we do for leaving a light in our room on at night w us in it and didn’t like taht she barked AT HIS SCREAMING then because he got arrested when he came back (me and dog locked out could remove our stuff had to wait until officers came to like help/oversee) he screamed get out off property then started throwing rocks and bricks at me and nova , keep in mind busy city suburb she has no collar or leash atm (inside and also all of our stuff) so the only safe place is in gate until we can all leave together(either to take her seprate but safe which is why from 9/10am-2pm i was trying to find smth) if she was out that gate she’d be gone. his sister JUST lost a dog in a car accident at same time as he was trying to force open gate while i begged not to shes get out and officers and my mom onw that second to get our stuff and remove us someone else walking by had a dog get out of their leash and he was trying help them “cause i just lost a dog this way” EXACT SAME SECOND
then he like ran off, at the throwing bricks point called 911 (cause i was supposed to anyway so we could remove stuff ) when i was on phone i gave wrong street twice in the panic so it took forever at this point i’m at 2% then officers come plus my mom with water (have had none except the two i asked some guys behind their gate for eternally grateful) and guy has disappeared (hiding out friends place hoping we just leave (everything we own?)) my mom calls him and officers talk to him he says half hour doesn’t get there for a full one and while waiting trying to figure out what to do for nova that’s best for her and maybe we could see again, they decide we could put her in a car and take to station with us u til we could get a shelter, then he shows up and chucks like only a couple things out and when officers walk through HE JUST LIES saying all of ours is his. upwards of thousand dollar worth of food maybe more considering spices (he had border nothing except what we’d given before we even went just cause he had nothing) my toiletries?? a tub of irreplaceable items , photos of my papa who died, birthday card, pictures sent to me, art and drawings given to me/done in treatment, my mom’s computer, a water bottle, a sport bag with my stuffie in it, and some of my clothes and some other things cooking supplies, my dogs food what? for his cat? (he doesn’t deserve that cat, absolutely love not fault on)
and he can do that, they knew he was lying but it’s his residence and it’s like there isn’t anything to do besides sue, i wanted my things back. had to have officer go back for a back pack cause it had my wallet and a cash app card w my name and my mothers meds so i mean he gave that over eventually , and then with like a bunch of stuff just thrown in his back yard we needed to like figure out what had what’s gone and what throw away cause can’t bring that much, and as going throw officers are like we don’t want to stand rushing over you while you go through causing forgetting things, so just call 911 when your done and we’ll come escort you and dog then, they leave, maybe 5 or 6:30, phone is dead now, got rid kf two thirds then he did come out while sorting for his garbage , like yeah we’re in way but it’s almost 8 we were calling that second and finishing up, he’s screaming off property and shit talking again, we were where we were supposed to be i said i’d just deal with his trash if it was so heinous n he didn’t want us touching. he wasn’t supposed tp b there til we had left . so we wait for officers it gets dark and cold and drizzly 5hrs go by nothing i’m just watching creepyass bugs on pavement after i magiver a leashe waist harness thing for her anyway something happend and all cars were redirected no one came until 2/3 am and they were SHITTY mostly mom talked to upfront , nova had been laying falling aslee but she did bark at them cause ya know middle of night she has no food no sleep watched some shit w all of us taday, and they’re like no. and can’t at night anyway no resources too late. so now we’re back in old apt w border nothing comparitive go 24hrs ago just until morning and it’s 4am and i STILL HAVENT SLEPT
#all my food all my family’s food our bowls#i didnt detail ev everything#one thing while me and nova were essentially stuff back yard a woman walked by and liked nova even we little testy and onw back just had#bought her a bag of treats just liek here i like dogs cute one#i hope she’s doing well and the guys that gave us two bottles of water we almost dehydrated/ over heated straight up#i feel bad think we woke neighbors in moving boxes back#also the last shitty shitty rude just sat in car and watched us moving everything on foot ‘we don’t know if ur commiting crime’ IF J WAS ID#GO IN N GET MG STUFF#vent#also second time#some guys HWO SAW HIM THRWO ROCKS yelled going mgh that black man did nothing#also video evidence of it as long that camer works and he also said on video to my mom he was gonna hit her again or he would
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honestly being the boss is exhausting
#my boss told me i'm the boss over the weekend cause hes gone#and i'm the only one he fully trusts#and so much shit happend today and i had to deal with it all .... like how does my boss do ti#also how am i supposed to do this everyday for years if i really get the position like duudeeee#iv been like full boss for a day now and im done#im still a trainee so i can go back to that on monday but likE im done with my training next summer ....#he wants me to get like a boss / manager position ....#i know i can do it#but like ... e x h a u s t i n g
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He Makes You Feel Insecure ~ Laxus
A/N: Erik/Cobra will be up next! I’ll probably post it next Tuesday or something like that. Anyway let me know who you want me to do next! I was thinking Natsu or Rogue 🤔 (future me: well that was a big lie 😶)
warnings: insecurities (he makes you feel weak), cursing
genre: angst to fluff
Other versions:
Gray ~ Erik/Cobra ~ Bickslow ~ Gajeel ~ Natsu ~ Jellal ~ Freed ~ Sting ~ Rogue
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It was supposed to be an easy mission. Go in by morning, get back by noon. For some reason you couldn’t get yourself to focus, often leaving blind spots, but luckily Laxus was always in time to protect you from harm.
You didn’t like relying on others, especially Laxus. It only made your overthinking worse. After all, why would he be with someone that’s not even S-class? You’ve heard the whispers in the guild and Magnolia. Mira-Jane and Laxus would’ve been a much better couple than you two. Even Erza would’ve been a better match, but he still chooses you. Was it out of pity? Did he think you’d get better eventually? Was it a joke? After all, you hadn’t been dating for that long. He could easily change his mind if he saw how weak you actually were.
As your thoughts kept going down the negative spiral, you once again left your right side completely open. Only this time Laxus wasn’t in time to protect you, resulting in a nasty cut that ran across your ribcage.
Laxus finally decided he had enough as he saw his significant other clutches her side, blood soaking through the fabric of your shirt. He electrocuted everyone around, making sure not to hit you.
“I’m sorry-“ You wanted to apologize but quickly cowered at his stone-cold glare
“What the hell do you think you’re doing, (Y/N)? How many times am I gonna have to save you today? Get your head out of your ass and start taking this serious, or I’m going home.” He growled “I don’t need this job. If anything it’s an embarrassment that I still go on such low-class jobs. This wouldn’t have happend if I went with Freed”
The vile words that came out of Laxus mouth, confirmed your already overwhelming fears. You were too weak. You were nothing but a burden to him. The difference in power between you two was enormous. While this job seemed like a walk in the park for him, you still would’ve struggled even if you didn’t have an off day. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt that’s for sure, but you still would’ve been drained afterwards.
“I’ll be better,” You said quietly as you bit through the pain. You recollected yourself and fought off the remaining bad guys, making sure that you were covered on all sides.
All throughout the fight, the pain in your side got worse. It felt like someone was stabbing you repeatedly, but you bit your tongue and decided to ignore it. You didn’t want to look even weaker in front of your boyfriend. After all, it was just a light graze, right?
“How’s your wound?” Laxus asked once you left the job requester’s house with your payment. “It’s fine don’t worry about it”
“Really? Let me take a look” He pressed, but you pushed his reaching hands away “I’m serious, Laxus, it’s just a small cut nothing to be worried about”
That was a massive lie. The cut burned with every step you took. The both of you didn’t even notice that there was still some blood spilling out of it due to your shirt being incredibly dirty from the mud and blood mixed together.
Once back at the guild, Laxus went straight up to Freed, Bixlow and Evergreen, while you went and sat at the table Lucy, Wendy and Carle were seated at.
“How did the job go?” Wendy asked as she sipped on whatever drink she had ordered from Mira-Jane.
“Some cuts and bruises, but the payment was worth it” You joked. The two girls and Exeed laughed at that before talking about something else.
You zoomed out as your wound was taking up all of your attention. It felt as if your heart was beating right where the cut was. With every heartbeat, you had to do your best to suppress a wince.
“(Y/N)? Are you okay? You look a bit pale” Carle suddenly asked, snapping you out of your thoughts
“Yeah… I’m going to the toilet” You didn’t make it far, because the moment you stood up you collapsed to the ground, fainting from the amount of blood you had lost.
“(Y/N)?” Laxus called out, panicked, as he saw your familiar figure hit the ground with a thud. He quickly shot out of his seat and was in mere seconds crouched next to your body, picking your head up carefully.
“Everyone, step back!” Makarov ordered as Wendy knelt next to you as well. She lifted your shirt and gasped at the deep cut.
“How did you not know about this?” Wendy asked the older mage as Mira-Jane quickly ran off to get a wet towel to clean out your wound and some bandages.
“I know she got hit, but when I asked her about it, she told me it wasn’t anything serious” Wendy was already performing a healing spell on you while Mira-Jane rejoined to clean out the wound. “She lost a lot of blood, so she’ll need some rest, other than that, I think I healed her”
“I’ll take her home. Thank you, Wendy” Laxus picked you up carefully before saying goodbye to the others and reassuring them he’d look after you.
As he walked the short walk home, he couldn’t help but wonder why you lied to him. Did you not trust him?
He had laid you down in bed and decided to prepare the both of you some food while you were still out cold. This is the reason why you woke up to the smell of something burning. “Laxus?” You croaked as you recognized the all too familiar room you woke up in.
“You shouldn’t be out of bed” He quickly rushed you back. It was a rare sight to see Laxus worry about someone this much, but it was a sight you often got to see when you two were alone.
“What happened?” You asked as you peaked over his shoulders at the steam coming out of your kitchen.
“I wanted to make us some food since you were still out cold, but as you can see, it didn’t really go as planned.” He replied as he scratched the back of his neck with the ever slightest tone of pink visible on his cheeks.
“It was very thoughtful of you, thank you,” You said as you got back in bed with you back rested against the headboard.
Laxus sat down as well, but at the end of the bed, putting some distance between the two of you, signalling that something was up. He made it even more clear when he let out a heavy sigh “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I didn’t think it was that big of a deal-“ “that’s bullshit, (Y/N), and you know it” He cut you off before you could finish your excuse. A heavy silence was placed upon the two of you. You were contemplating whether you should let him in on your thoughts or not.
“Do you not trust me?” He asked softly, you had never heard the feared Laxus this vulnerable, it made you feel guilty for making him feel that way.
“No! No, of course not. I trust you with all my heart, it’s just…” You trailed off, at a lost for words once again. You didn’t want to seem weak in front of him. Furthermore, you wanted to prove that you were just fine, but you couldn’t think of a believable lie.
“(Y/N), please, tell me what’s on your mind. Was it something I said?” He pressed on.
“What is it that you see in me, Laxus?” You asked softly. “Where is this coming from?”
You sighed, making sure you were 100% okay with letting him in on your insecurities before continuing “You can’t tell me you haven’t heard the whispers on the street about you and Mira. You two would be a much better match. I’m just some weak mage that’s only holding you back. I’ll never reach your level. Not only that, but I don’t even get why you still want to go out with me on these kind of jobs ‘cause it’s as you said, it’s an embarrassment for you to still do these. The fact that I still see them as hard only proofs how I’ll never be good enough to be an S-class wizard like Mira or Erza. I’ll never live up to the standard of being the girlfriend of the powerful Laxus. I’m just… Not good enough I guess”
He listened carefully that every word that left your mouth and realization struck him as you recalled his words. He had made you doubt yourself. “Is that really what you think I care about?”
You looked up at him and softly nodded your head while biting down your lip. Afraid of him starting to laugh at you for your insecurities. “Listen, (Y/N), I wouldn’t give two flying shits about you being strong or not. Hell, I wouldn’t even care if you had magic or not. I fell in love with you for who you are. You are the smartest, most creative, breathtaking woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. Don’t even get me started on that smile. I am deeply sorry for playing into your securities. I was frustrated with myself for not protecting you from that bad guy in time. Please, don’t ever feel like you can’t tell me something because you’re afraid that you’ll come across as weak. I care much more for your health than your pride”
“You love me?” You asked as you looked at him with puppy eyes.
“That’s all you took from that?” He chuckled softly, making you give him a sheepish smile “But, yes, I love you. I know we’ve only been dating for a couple of months and I don’t expect you to say it back, so-“
“I love you too, Laxus. Sorry for making you think I couldn’t trust you.” You said as you inched closer to give him a sweet kiss “So, how about some take out?”
#Laxus Dreyar#laxus#fairy tail laxus#laxus fairy tail#laxus x reader#laxus x angst#fairy tail#fairy tail lucy#fairy tail sting#fairy tail imagine#fairy tail x reader#fairy tail imagines#fairy tail angst#laxus angst#laxus dreyar imagines#laxus dreyar imagine#laxus imagine#laxus imagines#fairy tail laxus imagine#laxus dragon slayer#laxus dreyar angst#laxus dreyar x reader#natsu#natsu dragneel#natsu dragon slayer#natsu imagine#gray fullbuster#fairy tail fanfiction#laxus dreyar
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Secrets chapter 3
Summary: ellies birthday and mothers day is coming up as emotions and pent up anger are spiraling between you, negan, and jack while more and more secrets begin to unfold.
18+
Warming: nsfw, fluff, kink, depression, abuse
Sorry for the late update on this chapter its kind of a short one ive just have been going through some personal things and havent found the motivation to finish this one yet.❤ i hope you all like it!❤
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You and negan haven't spoke in a few days ellies birthday is today and you have been busy decorating. Negan is suppose to be picking up the cake at the store. jack has returned back from his "business trip" withq an odd hickey on his neck that keeps gawking at you everytime you speak to him. You want to avoid conflict because you arent so innocent yourself after what happen with negan last time you saw him but thats just not who you are....you have to confront him but you also dont want to ruin ellies day infront of everyone.
"Hey jack, do you mind helping me with this streamer" you called out to him from the ladder
"Sure hun" he took the streamer from your hand taping it up to the wall
"Thank you.....uh negan should be here soon with her cake" you said folding up the step ladder
"I could of went and grabbed it" he scoffs
"I uh..well sorry i didnt know it was a big deal" you try to laugh it off politely
"Dont even worry about it...." He walks past you ramming his ahoulder into you heading outside
Negan had arrive with the cake and so did a few of ellies friends and your mother. You and your mothers relationship really has never been that great but you try to make peace with it for ellies sake. Negan came in with a huge gift box all wrapped in pink with a bow.
" i thought we agreed nothing crazy" you whispered to him
"Whaat...can i not spoil my girl" negan grins at you
Ellie runs out of her room her eyes light up at the size of the gift her dad got her.
"Mommy look at this...its humongo!" She says messing with the bow
"I see honey..dont mess with it yet" you giggle
"Where is your boy toy.." His tongue slides across his bottom lip
You kept silent while negan stared you down waiting for a response but nothing came out his eyes were burning a hole through you he always knew when shit was up.
"Ah i see....the silent treatment" folding his arms
Negan walks off to go play with ellie and say hello to a few people when your mother walks up to you.
"Hey mom..." You say emotionless
"What is negan doing here.." She asks
"Mom...please dont. Thats ellies dad. I told you we are trying to work on things for ellies sake" you say annoyed.
"Well...once a cheater always a cheater. Im just saying" as she sips on her cup of wine walking away
A few hours have passed and ellie got to blow out her candles and eat cake. Jack still hasnt said much to you throughout the whole party and its more than obvious that negan is starting to catch on im just hoping he doesn't notice the hicky on his neck. Ellie has been bugging you about negans gift so you were going to let her open it.
"Ellie open it up over here sweetie so everyone can see" you say smiling
Ellie quikly rips the hot pink rapping paper off and squeals in excitement as she realizes its a electric scooter that she has been wanting. Negan was standing by your side with his hand sneakily rested on your lower back with a huge smile on his face.
"Oh my god you got me that scooter!!" Ellie begins jumping up and down
"Negan....those cost alot" you whispered in his ear
"dont worry about it....i got it taken car of" he says sternly
"Lets take it outside!!" Negans runs over and picks it up in excitment with all of the kids following him outside to ride on the scooter. You were throwing away dirty plates when jack came up to you
"So you want to explain why you and negan have been so close" he quietly says to you
You instantly start to burn with rage as he asks you that knowing he has been keeping things from you too and the fact his assistant melissa has been speaking to him inappropriately. You were holing the knife in your hand for cutting the cake reminding you of the incident that happened between you and negan once you found out he was cheating. you froze and gripped tightly on the knife thinking of how to approach this.
"You're a fucking whore..." He spat at you
"Jack.....get the fuck away from me" you quietly say
"Yeah i bet thats what you want.....so he can fuck you" he says through gritted teeth
"Its. Ellies. Birthday.....fucking knock it off we can settle this later" you slowly set the knife down unclenching your fist
Jack stands there glaring at you with his jaw clecnhed before giving up and walking away. You let out a sigh of relief and pour yourself a glass of wine. You take a sip closing your eyes feeling like everything is going in slomotion in that moment when you here yelling outside and notice its negan and jack. You drop your glass spilling your wine everywhere running outside.
"Back the fuck off man!" Jack yells with his fist balled up
"Ohh...you really want to go there dude..." Negan laughs
"You are fucking (y/n) and i know it!" Jack lunges towards him throwing a punch hitting negan in the face making him stumble
Negan catches his balace reaching up to his face touching where jack punched him in the mouth realizing he is bleeding negan licks the blood off his lips and lets out a sinister almost scary deep chuckle.
"Oh...you fucked up." Negan lunges towards jack football tackling him to the ground he starts punching jack over and over again blood all over his fists
"Negan!!!...no! Stop!" You rush over trying to pry negan off of jack
"Negan stop for ellie please!" You begin to cry struggling to finally get him off causing you to fall backwards with negan on you
"You are a dead fucking man!....now get the fuck off my property..." Negan threats
You push negan off to go check on jack you try to get jack to respond to you and see if he is okay but he just spits in your face shoving you away causing you to fall before you know it negan charges back over and starts beating the shit out of him all you can do is scream at them and cry. Through tear filled eyes you notice the cops rushing up the street pulling into the drive way the last thing you remember is the cops pulling negan off and everything went black.
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Jack and negan were both arrested but were soon let go apparently i had fainted due to stress and dehydration they kept me in the hospital until i was better. You kicked jack out of the house and you haven't spoke to negan since ellies birthday. Things have been rough being alone for ahwile and ellie was getting upset about not seeing her dad.
Text from negan:
Hey....im coming by
You looked at your phone to see a text from negan but you just ignored it and continued to cook some food for ellie. There was a knock at the door you sighed annoyingly before unlocking the deadbolt and opening the door to negans innocent brown eyes staring back at you. before you could give him a chance to speak you shut the door in his face but he quickly caught it in time with his foot in the doorway before it closed.
"Negan...ellie should be home. She is still upset" you sigh
"Thats okay i want to make it up to you two" he says pushing the door open coming inside
You just stand there silent with your arms crossed untill you hear ellies bus coming down the road and before you know it she busts through the door yelling.
"Mommmyyyy! Happy mothers dayzz!" Ellies runs up to you handing you a picture she made at school
"Awe...thank you sweet heart its gorgeous" you took the pink paper from her smiling and when to hang it on the fridge
"Look i want to take you two out to dinner...its mothers day and you deserve it..look i know i fucked up but that asshole had it coming" negan says
"Negan dont.....go ask Ellie she is the real one you need to be apologizing to not me" you stare at the ground avoiding eye contact.
"Ohh ellie daddy wants to talk to you!" He walks off to her room
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You, negan, and ellie were all out at dinner at your favorite steakhouse enjoying your meal when the waiter brought a bottle of wine
"Negan....i cant afford that" you quietly say
"Ah ah....you deserve it i mean you are the best mom ever" he winks at you popping the lid off pouring wine into your glass
"Thanks..." You shyly say before taking a sip
"So.....the school fired me" negan cleared his throat
You choked on your drink hearing the words that had just came out of negans mouth
"What?..how come" you say wipping wine off your chin
"Well....they dont want me as a coach anymore since what happened at ellies birthday. They say its wildly inappropriate and against policy to still have me there" he bites in his steak
"What are you going to do..." You ask worried
"Ohhh no biggie i always have things taken care of" he smiles at you
"If you need anything im here..." You look up at him
" i know....thank you" he reaches across the table holding your hand
The three of you finish up dinner afterwards you all go for a late walk through the park. It felt nice to get out and have some fresh air after what happended at the party. Your phone kept buzzing off the hook of texts from jack you kept trying to hide it from negan to not let him worry. You felt bad hiding it from negan but you knew it would start a fight but you also didnt want to let jack go without some talking. Negan took you and ellie back home ellie ran inside and got ready for bed.
"I know he is talking to you..." Negan says sternly while placing one hand against the wall beside your head
"Negan....can we not talk about this right now" you say turning your head away from him
"No!...you will look at me when im speaking to you" negan grabs ahold of your chin forcing you to look at him
"Yes....yes im still talking to him.." You say embarassed
"Why....he is such a load of whoreshit....im standing right infront of you (y/n)...im here now! Take me back please. Im an honest man now!" Negan growls
" get...off of me!" You scream and shove him away from you and begin to walk angrily down the road
"(Y/n) get back here now!...where the fuck do you think you are going!" Negan trys to catch up with you when it suddenly starts raining
"Negan stop trying so hard!...this is going nowhere!" You say crying
"Why do you keep saying that!...i want this to work!" Negan finally catches up to you grabbing you by the arm spinning you around
"......well i dont..." You choked on those words as they slipped out of your mouth it felt like your heart had just stopped for a split second it killed you to say that to negan but it had to be done
"You....dont want this." He said quietly and upset with rain drops running down his perfect face
"Negan....i.... I cant. You have to let me go" you say caressing his face" you said giving him a half smile with a single tear rolling down your cheek
"W....what about ellie.....thats my babygirl" Negan begans to tear up pulling you into a hug
"You can still be in ellies life.....i start therapy next tuesday" you say ending the hug
"You can talk to me (y/n)" negan sniffles
"There are just things that just feel easier letting out to a stranger sometimes..."
"I love you....." Negan says bresthlessly
"....i love you too but from a distance.....i have boundaries set now negan"
You and negan began to walk back to the house getting inside you hand him a towel to dry himself off. Negan follows you to the bedroom.
"There are still some of your clothes in the closet...." You say facing away from him
"You still have some of my old clothes here...." Negan opens the door seeing his shirts still hanging in the same spot before he moved out
"I didnt know if you still wanted them or not..." You say nervously
"Its okay. Thank you" negan takes off his soaking wet shirt switching it out with an old faded band shirt
"You can sleep on the couch if you would like..." You offer him
"You sure you are going to be okay with that?" He raises an eyebrow at you
"Yeah....plus its been lonely here just me and ellie" you chuckle handing him a blanket
Negan takes the blanket from you before turing around to open the bedroom door to leave. As soon as the door shut you quietly sobbed making sure it wasnt loud enough for negan to hear. You wiped your tears away before getting yourself ready for bed. You tossed and turned for most of the night your head filled with unnecessary thoughts and cenarios. You just wanted all of this pain to go away you dont know what you are doing with yourself anymore the only thing that keeps you holding on is ellie and negan.
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So as promised some thoughts about Sylki in general and in last episode and why I still don't see theme as a romantic anything.
When I first learned about Sylki I was confused and felt wrong out because it kind of felt like incest, but the more I thought about it and the more I learned about Sylvie I realized I was wrong. They not siblings and they both are soo different from each other that we would never considere them being the same person if we didn't know it. So yes I moved past that. I even enjoy there fanarts since I'm sacker for fanarts in general.
That doesn't change the fact they don't have romantic feelings for each other. If Sylkie shippers see them that way or want to accept this kiss as a victory and confirmation, they have every right to do it. Let's them have it. It's not how I see it thought.
Sylvie is easy to explain. I mean she admited in ep. 6 that she doesn't even trust him. They not friends because she doesn't even know how to approch that. So how someone who was alone for years, and doesn't know how to trust or develop any kind of relationship can fall in love with anyone so quickly? She can't. Sylvie needs to learn first how to allow anyone close to her, behind her walls. She puts her needs and goals first because she had only herself to consider since she was taken. Of course she betrayed Loki. Of course she used kiss as a distraction, because Loki is not so easy to win with.
Then, there comes Loki - character so complex that it's impossible to put him in the box. That line he said to Sylvie hit me and doesn't want to leave me in peace, that she can't trust him, and he can't be trusted. It hit me today that Loki problem here is that he doesn't trust himself. He doesn't believes in himself. He always plays roles of different version of himself that he thinks people want him to becasue he doesn't realy accepts himself. He doesn't even have an opinion about himself or about what he wants to do except for what people told him. It's even harder for him to understand his feelings because he doesn't have really good examples or experiences to learn from.
Here comes Mobius. A guy who seems to know Loki more that Loki knows himself. That sees behind his walls and is an expert in everything Loki. I'm sure Loki never even consider that he has romantic feelings for Sylvie before Mobius told him that. If Mobius who understans better how Loki works told him that, who Loki was to not believe him? Loki was never in love and is mess in general in feelings department, he wouldn't be able to tell how he is suppose to feel. If they coused a nexus even that's another proof that he must love her, right? I think Loki once again was playing expected role instead of listening to what his intuition was telling him. Remeber how sure he was that he doesn't care about Sylvie that way in his first conversation with Mobius but then he started to act differently? All their scenes since that point just seemed ackward like they both don't know what they dooing. This moments felt different that they banter and companionship in Lamentis-1.
That moment when Loki insisted to stay with Sylvie instead of going back with Mobius felt strange when I wached it first time, but I didn't know why. It looked like Loki wanted to go with Mobius but he stayed with Sylvie, even if she didn't want him to. I mean he was playing his role again, right?
We see how that all went to shit soon after. It's obvious that both Sylvie and Loki are on completly opposite sides in general. If they ever want to be friends they have to overcome their own issues first. It's easier with Mobius because he sees past Loki lies and problems.
Loki already change so much but there's still so much work to do. He's view of outside world is different now but he still needs to work on his inside world and I don't think that's something that Mobius can help him with. He really has to trust himself that he knows what's good for him and he knows what he's doing or how he feels.
If you want to change other people opinion you first have to change yours, after all. If Loki wants to help Mobius he first have to deal with his own shit. How long can you just put it for later? If Lokius will ever happend in next season then they better fix that first.
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Jack Morton x Fem!reader
A/n: english is not my first language, so I'm sorry if there is any mistakes. It's super fluff, hope you'll like it.
Y/n Duke had been a werewolf almost as long as her older brother Hamish. She's preety close to him, the same way she's close to all the kinghts, exepct for one of them - Jack Morton.
For some reason the girl and the newest werewolf don't get along that well. Y/n never wanted him to be part of the knights and blames him for all the problems with the order, while Jack thinks she's stupid and selfish, since he's a good werewolf. But let's just say that some things are about to change.
The order, and therefore the knights, had a new threat to deal with. A guy called Peter Don was doing lots of bad magic and hunting anyone that knew how to make it, all because he wanted to be the only person that possessed such thing.
Hamish and the werewolfs already knew about this whole thing, but had never managed to found the guy, so when Vera told him his name Duke was quick to call an emergency meeting with the rest.
Lilith and Randall had just arived to the house, only to find Jack and Y/n arguing about something that happend at their class a couple minuts ago, they rolled their eyes and set down, both of them were extremely tired of their bullshit. As soon as Hamish arrived he made them stop fighting and told everything Vera said to him, then the group started to plan what to do next.
Randall and Lilith were going to Peter's workplace, a clothing store, in order to investigate, Hamish was going to do some research about the guy with a couple books Vera had given to him, while Y/n and Jack were going to his place, neither of them were happy with it, but according to the older Duke they needed to be able to work together.
The car ride to Peter's place was very quite and weird. When they arrived Y/n informed their groupchat, Randall and Lilith already were taking a look at the store and Hamish said he hasn't found anything yet.
The duo broke into the guy's house and started to look for anything sightly suspicious. Nothing in the first floor, and nothing in the second, when they were heading to the basement Jack, that was pretty quiet, openned his mouth to talk about something that was not about Peter.
"Y/n"
"Morton"
"Why do you hate me so much?"
A minute of silence followed his question.
"What?"
"Like I get it that I caused a couple of problems and shit, but besides that, what did I ever do for you to hate me that much?"
"Well i-, you annoy me and you also hate me, so I don't get why you are asking me this."
"I was just wondering"
"You can wonder when we catch this bad guy"
The conversation ended but Y/n kept thinking about that. Why did she hate Jack so much? Okay, sure, he was annoying, but there was something more and she couldn't find out what, and this was making her pretty pissed.
Morton and Duke entered the basement, only to see something, actually, someone that Y/n didn't like that much either - Alyssa Drake.
Jack got quite excited to see the girl he once had a crush on, what only made Y/n roll her eyes. Alyssa said Vera asked her to see if his house had something weird, but she hadn't found anything. Jack started to make a small talk with her, and Y/n quickly dragged him out of that place.
"You should stop talking to Alyssa"
"What, why?"
"There's something about her that dosen't sit right with me"
"Are you jelous?
Y/n turned to Jack with a pretty angry face, but if you looked close enought a blush could be seen.
"If you think I'll ever feel something for you Morton, you need help"
Jack looked a bit sad, but hided that with a playfull smirk, when he was about to open his mouth to say something sarcastic, Y/n screamed.
Peter had found them, stabbed Y/n and started to run. Y/n feel into the ground and tried to stop the bleeding.
"Go after him"
"What no I can't just let you bleeding here"
"It's okay, I'll heal"
The boy stoped to think for a moment, but when Y/n gave him the sweetest smile ever, he decided to go after Peter, after all she's a werewolf, she would be fine.
Morton started to run after Don, but Y/n wasn't healing, so she looked over to her belly, and guess what, a green smoke was coming out of it. The knive Peter used was poisoned, Y/n thought it was funny, since her brother had once being stabbed by a poisoned knive. She tried to reach her phone and call someone, but she didn't had enought strenght for that, the poison was way to strong.
All she could do was wait for Jack to come back and help her. When Y/n was about to close her eyes she heard him call her name and Jack started to run towards her.
The order wanted Peter alive so that they could ask him questions, so Jack had only knocked him out and was trying to get him to his car.
He kneeled next to Y/n and told her to hold on while he pressed her belly to make the bleeding stop. The first thing Jack did was call Alyssa, he asked the blonde girl to come pick Peter and take him to Vera, then he proceeded to pick Y/n and take her to his car.
Alyssa did what he asked and Jack was now driving pretty fast to the knights place. He kept assuring Y/n that she would be fine, but deep down he didn't really know what would happen, the only thing he knew was that he couldn't just lose Y/n, no not like that.
As soon as he arrived at the house Jack picked her up very carefully and opened the door. Lilith looked over from her sit to see what all that noise was, only to find her best friend dieing in Jack's arms.
While Morton was putting her on the sofa, Batory shouted for Hamish and Randall that came downstairs running. Jack told everything that happen and Lilith was preparing a potion that would cure her, at least that's what they hoped, Hamish and Randall were freaking out.
Y/n drunk the disgusting potion and the green smoke was gone. She was fine and already healing. The knights were pretty happy and relieved, but Jack still had a sad expression.
He almost lost the girl he loves and she doesn't even know that, actually it's worse, she doesn't feel the same.
After that Randall left, he had a date with Gabrielle, Lilith helped Y/n go to her room upstairs and went to her own, Hamish had to go report everything to Vera, and maybe make out with her, but Jack had nothing to do, so he just set down in the living room and kept thinking about his feeling towards the girl that hated him.
A couple hours passed, it was pretty late now, and Jack got tired of just thinking, it was time to do something about that, even if later he might regret it. So he walked to Y/n's room expecting her to still be awake. Her door was open so he entered the room.
"Wow Morton what are you doing awake? It's pretty late."
Y/n said that in a very cute tone, not the one she usually uses with Jack. The thing is that she had also being thinking about the same thing he had. Y/n realized that the reason why she had been hating him so much lately, was that she actually liked him and was scared to do something about it, so Y/n thought pretending she still hated him like she once did would make her feelings go away. But today when she saw Jack all worried about her, everything changed.
"Don't say anything just let me talk. I don't hate you okay, I once did but not anymore."
Y/n was very confused.
"I like you, not only as a friend. I have been liking you for a couple months now, and I didn't knew how to tell you."
Okay now Y/n was chocked. Was she dreaming? Did the poison actually kill her and now she was seeing things?
"Look I know you hate me and stuff, but today when you almost died I realized I needed to tell you, so well, you know."
Y/n got up from her bed and walked up to Jack.
"You can keep hating me no problem, i-"
"Just shut up and kiss me Morton"
"Wait, what?"
"I like you too asshole"
"For real?"
"Yes"
Y/n and Jack kissed each other with a lot of passion and love. It was a slow and sweet kiss, but a very needed one, after all both of them had been pretending they hated each other for way longer than they should.
After what seamed to be a long time, they finally broke the kiss to breathe, and they couldn't stop smiling, everything was okay now.
"Wow, hm this was pretty nice, but I think you have to rest, I mean, you were stabbed today"
Y/n agreed and Jack started to leave her room, but she stopped him before he could actually leave.
"Can you stay here with me?
"Of course"
Y/n and Jack got into the girl's bed and cuddled. Her head was close to his neck and he was holding her while drawing random things with his finger in her exposed skin.
The room was silent, but there was no need for words, all they needed was each other. Then Jack said something and blushed
"Can you play with my hair please?"
Y/n smiled and nodded. Now her hand was tangled in Morton's hair, both of them were extremely happy.
Time passed and they stayed like this, sometimes Jack would say something about how good that felt and Y/n would laugh saying she loved his hair. That was when she started to feel her eyes closing, she was super tired.
"Thanks for helping me today, and thanks for staying here with me."
Y/n said that in a tired and sweet voice while yawning.
"Anything for you princess."
Jack kissed her forehead and they fell asleep together without a care in the world.
#the order headcanons#the order#jack morton#randall carpio#lilith bathory#hamish duke#vera stone#alyssa drake#netflix#jack morton fic#jack morton x reader#jack morton imagine#the order tv show#enemies to lovers#fluff#fem!reader#jack morton fem! reader#my random thoughts is part of lots of fandoms#my random thoughts headcannons
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aight. here somes the ask lore thingie
tw for ppl readin: mention of mental illness, father mention
firstly, how did rui end up meetin the rest of the gang? did they all have sum sort of run in? did they just happen to meet on exident?
also is the father a villain? i remember ya mention him, and was wonderin
and do they have a specific place where they stay? like in a dormstory, a single house, do they live in a single town, or in completly different places?
do any of them suffer from mental/physical illnesses? if they do, how does it affect their life/relationships w others?
Aight, so here we go, be ready cuz shit's long.
(1st part - The Rui n the gang meeting; The Shou meeting) No Tw
Honestly, I also kinda wanted to do this for quite a long time, so I'm gonna firstly talk about how the gang (w/o really mentioning the others name's since they're gonna get introduced soon) met itself and decided to form, and then I'll individually do It in Lyva's and Shou's case, specifically Shou's since i mentioned that his meetin was somethin id have to take care of in another post, so i will rn.
First things first, w the whole gang. Now It wasn't really casually, mainly because Lyva n Rui did meet up, but It was during a special occasion still, that being a really important manifestation in one of the main regions in my oc universe. (They don't have name's yet so pls don't bash me🤡) Them being primarly the Forest, where Rui eventually lives in after all of his past shit, the near-countryside part, where Lyva was living, a pretty much city living on water, where Shou's currently living, and many more, as such the dunes with which I'll introduce Qiran (hopefully tomorrow/today),The sea itself, some High up places and as I said many, many other more. Other than this brief intro, they meet up where Lyva used to live, but mainly because of problems and out of conviniance.
Everyone had something to take back from, so they agreed to help eachother to reach that end, so it's all really planned. Now i won't really go w Lyva, cuz i explained how she met Rui the first time n how they helped her, so I don't need to ramble more on this. Now I'm gonna go w Shou's part though.
This Is more of a note i wanted y'all to know first, cuz i really like how Lyva n Rui met him the first time (cuz the second time was when the gang then all agreed to form n all that jazz.). Basically, Rui n Lyva were out, n visiting new places as such, to prepare themselves further and to try and search for more weapons, cuz they both knew that they'd eventually get in trouble, and even though they still are good, they wouldn't stand much a chance, n since Shou's Place is known for its production they decided to go. N fun fact, there's many funny shit that happends, for example Rui tries to touch a fish, but gets SLAPPED by It. They're still mad >:[. Ajkskdj anyways, some other stuff happends n they just, lose themselves. They had a map ofc but still managed to do so. But Rui was usin It so, I don't really blame em for gettin lost.
Shit happends n they find themselves pratically in front of his shrine/palace. Shou's servitors (cuz he saw everything happend from afar n gave them the okay) brought em in, but rather than makin em idk some tea n just making them recouver, Shou rather put them under some "tests" w/o tellin em, to see if they were any use.
For example he brought them some cups of tea, but before drinking them Rui noticed somethin unusual in the water, so they gave Lyva a sign to not drink It, n as Shou asked as a reason why they just replied that they weren't thirsthy, leavin Shou in a kind of defeated state. Bitch if i love this part honestly, there's so much fun to seein all of their reactions, but I'm gonna go brief rn. So other of this tests pass later n Shou eventually gets upset cuz they're all winnin n seemingly makin fun of him, lettin him in a weaket standpoint, n a fight happends. Even though it's a 2v1 situation he can still manage pretty well, so It ends in a draw. They get to talk after this and get to understand that they don't have to necesseraly be on the opposite side, though Shou Is still unsure whether to belive in that or not.
After they leave him, pratically almost alone w only a bunch of servitors helpin him. He admits defeat n won't show up until the event and yadayada. (Also it's during this weak time of his he'll meet Qiran which i already have plans w so it's all goin to be said bout their relationship in their post.)
(2nd part, the father mention.) Tw:father mention
So it's true that w Shou i did mention his father, but I'm not entirely sure bout his involvment honestly. In theory he kind of is a villain itself, even because of his devilish nature, so it's true, but im not sure whether to make him an independent villain or part of a group of them. But rather than that yes, i do want to make him some sort of villain in the end, because that's also part of Shou's agreement to be part of the group. I will make concept art for him so he'll definetly be involved. Not gonna lie, mabye that bastards also involved w Rui's cult too in a way or another but im givin in too many details holy shit I'll never get outta this fuck
(3rd part- where do they live) No Tw
They live in their own homes honestly, but It would be no surprise if they'd all decide to sleep over someone in specifical, though they have their own place. I made some concepts for Rui's intern home, which here It Is 😤 (forgive me for the bad quality but it's 2 am rn 🤡) I made this a while ago but only did Rui's, so I'll do Lyva's, Shou's n the other one's too. They live in different places, for the exception of, atm, Qiran, since I'm gonna say that they're more of a traveller n don't have a stable home.
(4th part- the mental/physical ilnesses) Tw: Self harm and Mental ilness mention
Well, this Is gonna be a ride. They all suffer from Ptsd, which Rui n Shou suffering from It the most. It still affects them all, though in different occasions, so Imma just do them in specifical. (Also because i gotta add some shit to shou that i didn't wanna add because i thought It was too much honestly)
Rui-
It affects them really much. They use crystals n gems to avoid anything going w their past or anything remotely related It, as whenever they feel awful about havin those flashbacks when they still were a child. They never want to talk about what happened, n during their moments It gets really, really bad. Both emotionally and physically, as their body sometimes cannot handle anything so it completely shuts down. They never really got any help for It as Rui's too scared to share bout their experience, both because of trauma itself that doesn't make them say anything even if they wanted to and because of the cults influence, so either way they've got to handle It by their own.
Lyva-
Other than havin to deal w mornin sickness, which Is the least for her, she has to deal w her neglectful childood and how desperate she's always been for litteraly anythin, whether it's related about love,friendship, food, toys, anything. She tried to seek for help and semi found It, but as of now she can't keep up w It and has better things to take care of. It's still really bad overall, but she's hoping for things to get better. Spoiler It really won't.
Shou-
⭕Tw for sh⭕
It's... really fucking bad. I'm gonna get outta this w saying something i didn't want to add because it's really triggerin, but im gonna do It now. So basically, I've mentioned them acting feminenly for his own mother, but i didn't say what would've happened if he displeased her. She would just stare down at him and whispering some awful shit or names. This would happen especially whenever he'd slip off that mask of his or revealed even a tiny bit of his devilish essence. Note that he's still a child here. So, best thing he could to was to "punish" himself, which basically consists of him scratching his arms too much and, i don't really want to continue this, forgive me but it's kind of triggering even for me. But...you can guess what he's doing, since he even to this day still keeps sharp nails. I'm sorry for putting this, but it's another way to show how his mother fucked him up and now suffering from this.
I'm sorry for rushin the last part but i'm not personally vibing w it.
Tags undercut
@a-chaotic-dumbass @spoopy-fish-writes @dopesaladlady @damnfoxx (I'm really unsure bout taggin ya in this ;-;)
If you want your tag removed, dm me cuz it's 3 am at the moment n i may have messed em up. (I'm not gonna recheck tomorrow so that's why)
#whdkkwkwkdk honestly I've written so fucjing much n for what😭😭#ruruasks#rurusocs#ruruslore#oc#ocs#my ocs stuff#rui#Lyva#shou#oc lore#i hope this shit doesn't flop cuz I've written so much n im just goinwbdjlwkdjdowodijqowodjdjoaodjdjdj#asks
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It was a misunderstanding.
Warning : nothing to bad , swearing
Tsukkishima ×reader , kuroo x reader ,akaashi x reader ,bokuto x reader .
_______________________________________
The boys were still all practising even though the coaches had called it a night. And you just finished cleaning the gym with kiyoko and were heading to the kitchen to prepare dinner .
As you were walking past the gyms a ball flys out and hits your head . You fall back from the impact ,which leaves ur butt on the concrete . You look up to see kiyoko. She has a worried look on her face . Then from the corner of your eye u see a tall white figure rushing towards you , it was tsukki .
He bent down towards you , you were about to tell him that u were alright but he just grabs the ball and stand back up . He just looks at kiyoko once "is she ok?" You nod and he just turns around and started walking toward the entrance of gym 3 .
"Hey! Tsukki who the hell do you think u are ?" You scream as u quickly get on your feet and move towards him . He swiftly turns around and you hit your face in his chest . "What?" He says wiping his shirt . "Your not even going to apologise to me " you say putting my hand on my hip . "You said you were fine so nothing even happend , stop over-reacting " with that he just turns around and walk into the gym .
You were used to his bitchy side , but u wanted to piss him off the way he always does to you . So like a dumbass you walk into the gym forgetting that other people are also practising ."tsukki !!! You son of a bitch , I'm gonna shove that ball up ur big white a-" you stop ,seeing kuroo with the ball in his hands . He just looks up with a disgusted look on his face "wait , this ball ?" And throws it to bokuto .
You quickly palm ur face and grab the ball from bokuto and hit a serve towards the tall blonde head that belonged to tsukki . His back was facing you so saw his glasses hit the floor . But by Akaashi's reaction you realized you might have over-reacted a little .
He slowly turns around , his glasses still on the floor. He just grabs the ball and walks towards me . You were terrified , u put ur hands behind ur back and looked at ur feet . Now he was right in front if you , towering over u . You try to say something but is cut off by tsukki putting a finger below ur chin ,making you look into his eyes. And for a few seconds u were speechless . You have never actually seen him without glasses , and he actually looked hot when he was so angry like this .
"I didnt throw the ball out of the gym so I didnt think I needed to say sorry to you , but either way I dont think u needed to throw that ball at me ?" He says with a raspy voice . He just puts the ball in my hands . I look at him confused "wait , u arnt gonna scold me ?" You say confused .
"It was a misunderstanding, beside I dont have the time " he says with a straight face , then turns around to walk towards the benches and drink some water . You were still in shock and only now realized that three of the gym 3 squad were staring at u and tsukki. Kuroo was wearing tsukki's glasses and bokuto had his elbow rested on kuroo's shoulder . Even akaashi stood close to them not saying a thing but just watching the commotion.
"What are u idiots looking at ? " you say as you ran to kuroo and grab tsukki's glasses off of him . "Hey! I look hot with those on " he whines as I clean the lens with my shirt .
Y/n pov .
"Damn y/n , that jump serve was really good . Who would have known you become a pro when u get angry " bokuto says as he towers behind me . "Oh shush, "
"can I have my glasses back ?" Tsukki asks with his hand extended .
I hand it to him and he simply just walks away . I felt a little sad and move towards akaashi and softly said "that's too bad , he actually looked really hot without those glasses" akaashi looks a little surprised but then smirks and leaves me to go practise . And I couldn't help to think of tsukki in that way , he usually just annoys me and I annoy him . It's how it's always been , but I find his rudeness kind of amusing .
Idk what pov this is :
you thanked ur bad taste in men and began cleaning up the gym . You only then realized that kiyoko had left and u were left to clean the entire gym .
You were wearing a sweatshirt but you were getting kinda sweaty after cleaning around and decided to take it off. You only had a light purple crop top with short white shorts . You didnt really think much if it and tied ur hair and began doing the heavy lifting .
Third pov .
Bokuto was just about to hit a strike but the ball stopped a few meters in front of him . He froze in confusion to why the ball was too short, he turns to akaashi .
To see ,akaashi standing still and was staring at y/n . Her hair was tied up and she was practically wearing nothing . Now all the boys realized .
Bokuto felt his heart drop as he saw how short ur shorts were, and they were practically invisible because they were so tight .
Akaashi wanted to grab ur waist and slide his hands up ur shirt .
kuroo wanted to grab ur hair and rip ur shirt off and take you right there in the gym , he then felt his shorts get a little tighter .
If u think these boys were starstruck , tsukki had a much different idea in his head .
He didnt even realized anything until he saw the players attention elsewhere. He noticed how u look when u tied your hair , as u almost never had ur hair in a high ponytail. And he knew he'd already seen you wear that shirt before, but with those shorts he felt like he had seen u for the first time .
You were still oblivious to the situation the boys were in ,until you realized that they were too quite for too long. You turned ur head to see all eyes on you . "What" you say with a bench in your hand .
The boys looked around all shy until kuroo came rushing towards u " you shouldn't be doing all this by yourself, here let me help " he said as he took the weight of the bench . Now you were even more shocked ,"its my job but thanks " you say as you smile at yourself like a idiot .
"What are you smiling about?" Tsukki says as he grabs the empty water bottles that were laying on the floor . You turn around to see bokuto grabbing the towels from akaashi's bunch . You were really confused now . But you let it be , after the boys where done with ur job they just stood in front of u with their hands behind their backs .
"Ok you guys are acting really weird ,what happened?" No one said anything. So you quickly thought of something .
"Ok if you guys are done I'm going to hang out with daichi and asahi, he was calling me a while a- "
"NO !" All the boys scream and stretch their hands out .
"Why are u guys acting so weird? Bokuto tell me now !" I say knowing bokuto too well .
He gives me puppy eyes and takes one look at akaashi , who was giving bokuto a death glare . "Sorry y/n "
" You just look so hot in those clothes today " kuroo blurted.
"What " I say , my eyes almost popping out of my head by the change in character and situation . The other boys groan in annoyance and tsukki just tskk.
You raise ur eyebrow at the boys " ok thanks for the ego boost I was feeling a bit insecure today but like what the fuck , u guys are so weird " I say laughing. "Why are you guys making such a big deal out of this ? " akaashi was the colour of a tomato , and his eyes not daring to look you in the eyes .
"We just couldn't focus on the game with you doing.. well the things you were doing .We are only men can u blame us ." Bokuto says with smirk on him face .
" you are still boys but you guys are the real ones to talk " I say bending down to grab my sweatshirt as akaashi and tsukki sit down on the ground. "Whats that suppose to mean ?" Tsukki asks drinking from his bottle .
"Are you guys that dumb ?" I say as they all give me confused looks. "You guys are 6 feet something boys wearing booty shorts and tight shirts while jumping, screaming and sliding on the floor . Theres a reason I became manager without even knowing it was a volleyball club. To be honest you guys are probably the hottest boys I've ever seen "you said too much . As if these boys weren't cocky before , you knew u had actually killed them . "I mean only when u guys play in a proper match "
"That's why you used to come to every practise first and then leave the last " tsukki said .
"No I'm a just the best manager in the world "I try to defend myself.
"I always knew u had a thing for me y/n " kuroo says as he grabs his bag ,
"no thats not what I said , I said u guys are hotter when you play , and I dont like you guys in that way " you were obviously lying but you had to keep cool .
"Whatver u say y/n , but just know I'm only one floor away . If you need more help with any matter just call me anytime u like " he said with a wink .
"Shut up , besides I gotta go now to make you guys dinner , please dont be late to dinner again . There wont be any more food left " you say as you blush at bokuto remark . "Ur lucky I like being bossed around from time to time " kuroo said pushing a stand of my hair behind my ear and then I practically run out of the gym .
Third pov .
"Damn shes hot when she's shy " kuroo says . "Yea too bad she is into me more " bokuto says in kuroos face .
"What!! she never said that ? Did she ?"
"I actually thinks she likes tsukki " this was the first time akaashi opened his mouth about this topic . "What!?!? " the boys said at the same time .
"A few minutes ago she said that tsukki looked good without his glasses , so I'm guessing she likes tsukki more "
tsukki gets all shy and defensive and says . " she doesn't like me , today she told me how much she loves your hands , and some weird shit "
"What " akaashi says as he looks down at his hands . "Yea she told me that too , I think she has a hand fetish " kuroo said .
"Well whatever she told me she loves bokuto's cake , I didnt even know you baked cake " akaashi asks bokuto. "I dont bake cake , and I haven't even seen her eat cake . "
Kuroo starts laughing " you know cake mean ass, right ?"
Bokuto in shock now " she said I have a good ass , omg she does like me "
"What about kuroo? What did she tell you guys about him ?" Tsukki asks a little too eager . But the boys just look at each other .
"Relax , whatever she likes about me she has already told me face to face , she even called me her captain once "
"What , that's not fair ,I'm a captain too!!" bokuto sulked as kuroo stuck his tongue out .
They were laughing as akaashi's phone rang . He answered the call " ok ok we are coming , relax y/n !" He said as he quickly cut the line .
"You have y/n's number !?!?that's not fair , she said she would give it to me but she forgot . " bokuto said grabbing his shoes .
And the boys then made their way to their rooms to get ready for dinner .
_______
Idk what this is but I might add more to this .
@haikyuu-texts @teawithlemonacid @tsukkisuki @tsukki--daisuki @keiji-n @kotaro-kun @keisdumpling @kozumebabie @bokutos-eyebrows @bokuto @bokutokoutarou @bokutosbiceps @bokuotaku @akaashiisbae @akaashikeji @akaashiofficial @akaashikoutarou @akaashisstar
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu daichi#haikyuu x reader#akaashi scenarios#akaashi icons#akaashi imagine#akaashi haikyuu#akaashi x reader#akaashi x y/n#akaashi x you#tsukkishima kei#tsukkishima x reader#tsukki headcanons#haikyuu tsukki#tsukki#haikyuu tsukishima#kuroo smut#kuroo x reader#kuroo x y/n#kuroo fanart
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old things, half forgotten
fandom: the wayhaven chronicles
pairing: (m!detective x Ava)
warnings: none, this is more a character study of my detective than anything else; part of a February Prompt list: day 1 - love letters
I’ve been really into twc lately, so of course the first thing that popped into my mind, when I decided to follow a prompt list “make it about wayhaven! make it about wayhaven!”. So, yeah, this happend. Fair warning though, this is spell check by nothing, but google docs - it’s late and I’m tired and just so happy that I managed to write something for the first time in months.
summary: Janosch comes home. Waiting for him is a box full of memories and a very judgemental cat.
Janosch closes the door behind him and kicks his shoes off. His bag lands somewhere on the floor between the front door and the coat rack, quickly followed by his jacket. Schrödinger eyes him in his wise, judgemental way from the open kitchen door.
“What?”, Janosch asks, more harshly than intended, but Schrödinger just meows and walks off - probably to stare out of the window and plot revenge. Janosch sighs. Shit, he thinks, shit shit shit. He moves to the living room and crumbles down on the couch.
The wall next to him seems so much higher than usual, with his head hanging off from the couch, it’s a light, soft orange that he picked out with Tina back when he first started at the station and had moved into a new apartment - his home, now. He remembers how they had painted the walls together - in old t-shirts and even older jeans -, Tina had made little hats out of newspaper for them both and ABBA’s Dancing Queen had been blasting in the background. Life had been so much easier then. He hadn’t been detective and the biggest problems in his life had been a non-existing mother and an ex-boyfriend, that he desperately needed to get over, not… not whatever the fuck is going on now.
Janosch smacks his hands over his eyes and lets out a deep, deep sigh. Maybe if he just tries not to think about it- but it’s no use. And he knows that it’s no use. He is too old to try to repress his emotions until his problems go away. Not that that ever worked for him. Problems tend to stay, he finds, stay and fester and get all nasty and disgusting if nobody deals with them. So, he has to deal with them.
He sits up, slowly rubbing his forehead. The question is how. How does he deal with his problem- his… crush. Is it a crush? He’s not sure. It’s attraction, that much is certain. He finds no shame in admitting that. Ava is an attractive woman, nothing wrong with noticing that. And he enjoys flirting with her. Enjoys that he can make her blush sometimes, but enjoys it even more when she doesn’t blush, but her lips lift into what is almost a smile and her eyes twinkle with what is almost playfulness and she almost flirts back. (She enjoys it too, he thinks, hopes.)
And, yes, he does care for her and the thought of her being hurt - hurt trying to protect him - makes his chest feel too tight and the air too thin. So, yeah, it’s probably more than attraction, probably also more than a crush, but that’s a scary thought and he’s not quite there… yet.
His gaze falls to one of the cardboard boxes that’s been pulled from the shelf and now sits in front of it. He planned on looking through that one today after work. Part of his supposedly annual cleaning regiment. Getting rid of old stuff, making room for new one. But that was yesterday evening, before Ava and he… well, before she had almost touched his cheek and he had almost kissed her and almost thought that she might want him as much as he does. (That much, huh?) Now it seems almost pointless. Why make room for the new, if the new doesn’t want to be here? But he grabs the box anyway and starts sorting through it.
It’s mostly pictures, still in their respective envelopes from then he got them printed, and he decides to keep them immediately. There’s a jar of sand that Tina had gifted him as a reminder from a holiday long, long, long ago and he looks at it for a moment. It’s just sand, he thinks. He can get into his car and drive to the beach if he regrets throwing it away too much. It lands on the steadily growing ‘keep’ pile.
Next is a little cotton bag that’s starting to fray at the edges. He turns it over and a collection of different shells falls into his lap. Some of them are broken, splintered into tiny, tiny pieces, that dust his jeans now. With a little patience he could probably glue them back together. He sighs. He is so bad at this. How is this supposed to work when he can’t even fight the urge to glue some old shells back together only to put them back into an old bag, which he’ll put into an old cardboard box never to be seen again?
He grabs a magazine - he can make out a headline about the right treatment of balcony plants in winter - from the coffee table and bushes the broken shells on it. That much he can throw away. That much at least.
He turns back towards the box, grabbing something from the bottom of it and pulling it out. It’s a small stack of notes. Shit, that’s something he hasn’t seen in a while. They are colourful pieces of square paper, the kind you keep on your desk to take notes, and he can see his own forcefully careless scrawl on it. The ink has slightly faded with the years, but not so much that he couldn’t read them anymore. “take care” reads the first one , “leftovers are in the fridge” the next one with a little star doodled in the corner, “i love you” the third.
He looks at the last one for a while. It’s a soft baby blue and the edge crumples between his fingers. It’s been years, he thinks, years. He used to leave them around the flat, when he lived together with Bobby, for him to find. He’d write them and imagine how Bobby would find them and feel loved or touched, at least. But the notes always stayed where he’d left them. At first he thought that maybe Bobby just forgot, but it was always Janosch who’d collect them at the end of the day and eventually he stopped.
He’s glad now that Bobby didn’t pick them up. He wouldn’t want him to have these now.
There’s an annoyed meow to his left. Schrödinger has returned from his plotting and is now looking at him with questioning, pale yellow eyes. “These are quite old, buddy. Older than you, I think.”, Janosch says, still holding the blue note. His cat meows again and he nods. “Yeah, I know. I’m just bad at getting rid of stuff.” He sighs. “But you’re right. It’s high time for these to leave.”
He collects the rest of the notes and moves to the kitchen - Schrödinger following and pressing against his legs, probably trying his damn hardest to make Janosch trip. He makes it in one piece though. He looks at the notes and suddenly he’s a college student again and in love and maybe-, he thinks but cuts himself off before the sting in his chest gets any worse and throws them in the bin. It’s better that way. It would have been better like this for quite a while.
Schrödinger meows up his leg. “Oh, now you are in bad need of attention? Stupid cat.”, he mutters, but picks him up and presses a kiss between Schrödinger’s ears. “I love you.” Schrödinger purrs - a little.
Janosch carries him back to the living room, ignoring the mess of envelopes and sand jars and broken shells he left behind (Because isn’t that what happens when you clean? You just make the mess worse?), and sits down on the couch. The cat, a warm, comforting weight on his lap. “You know”, he ruffles Schrödinger’s grey fur, who purrs in response, “I think she’d like them. The notes, I mean.” Schrödinger stops purring and opens his yellow eyes to judge him. Janosch laughs and then sighs. “Yeah, I have it bad.”
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If you still do the flower ask thingys.. 👉👈 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙜𝙤 :)
HoooH boY hEre we gO-
Alisons: Sexuality?
I sexually identify as a can of beans
Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?
Cis female she/her
Amaryllis: Birthday?
27 September
Anemone: Favorite flower?
All flowers pretty,, but stargazer lily, rose, dahlia and cherry blossoms
Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?
I don't watch tv but I'll list some other stuff i like to watch:mha, beastars and aggretsuko
Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?
Idk depends on scenario??
Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?
"Kanye West he likes, fingers in his ass."
Aubrieta: Favorite drink?
Any Milkshakes or smoothies (mostly banana and strawberry for milkshake and p much anything for smoothie)
Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
I've never had kith
Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?
Well you see yes but actually no
Baneberries: Favorite song?
I listen to a lot but to keep it short:baby in the kitchen, in my mouth and friends slowed (chase atlantic)
Basket of Gold: Describe your family.
We p chill fam
Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?
Irl bestie,, shes not on tumblr lol
Begonia: Favorite color?
PinKKK
But i like most colours
Bellflower: Favorite animal?
Cats,,,,
FoxES,
ANYTHING CUDDLY AND CUTE
Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?
Night
Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?
I'd be like a doggo bc it would be the most fun i think-
Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be a vet but then when my granny asked me "but whos gonna clean up the animal poop?" I was like "eWW pO0pP!" and then decided that mayb i shouldn't be a vet
Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?
They're either really kind and sweet
Or literal demons from hell
Legit no inbetween
Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?
I'm afraid of lot of things-
Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.
I was one dumbass bitcg-
Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?
Idk eat pizza and cry or smth ajakamkw
Buttercup: Relationship Status?
Single
Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?
NEW YORKKK, CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFF THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN'T DO NOW YOU'RE IN NEW YOOORKKK
Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?
When someone hugs me or just generally spends time with me
Canna: Do you have any tattoos?
Nop
Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?
I used to have piercings when i was a bab but eHh haven't worn them since and i dont think my ear holes are big enough now-
California Poppy: Height?
4'10 grrr I'm the omega midget and I'll devour ur ankles
Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?
Nop
Carnation: What are you currently wearing?
Pant, pink top and black hoodie
Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?
I think i have??
Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?
My mom and my dad
Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?
I never kith
Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?
I dont have one so imma say sans bc it always looks out of place and makes me laugh-
Columbine: Are you tired?
No
I feel like screaming and jumping around my room like a crackhead
Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?
Nothing in particular ig
Coneflower: Dream job?
Smth kinda fun and art or design related hopefully,,,,
Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?
Introvert but i also get lonley easily
Crocus: Have you ever been in love?
Nop,,,,
Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?
I would get run over by 5 monster trucks, jump off a plane, get mauled by 10 bears, get trampled on by a stampede, get brutally tortured for 12 hours straight, yeet myself into the Grand Canyon and then break all my bones with my bare hands if they weren't broken already
Ok basically i care a lot
Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?
I had this st bernard plush called Sparky and this lion named Sammy,,
Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?
Libra
Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?
My memory is legit so bad it's probably concerning uHHH
Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?
Mayb art??
Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?
Ehhh i might reason with them and then if they still disagreed I'd just keep the relationship a secret
Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?
My parents
False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?
Ehhh arT
Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?
EhhHh everything that isn't art-
Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?
Oh boy here comes my shitty memory-
Hmmm
Idk but I'm mostly happy that I've been more social and stuff and i feel like im kinda coming out of my shell a bit
Not sure what to say for other 2 bc nothing in particular has really happend?
Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?
Ehhh oK??
Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?
Mayhapsn't
Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?
I hope to pass all my exams and get an okish job mayb
Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?
1.fRIENBS ILY MY HABIBIS
2. Fammm
3. eHhh yummy food,,
4. Drawing and uhhh art
5. EPIC MUTUALS
6. Ok idk what else aside from like serious stuff like house and etc.-
Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?
Drawing, crying, venting to a friend/parent
Hellebore: How do you show affection?
Hugssss,kith,cuddle, *draws u stuff*
Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?
MmmmmMy aRRt?
Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.
Wake up
Don't go to school
Vibe with friends
Sleeb
Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?
MmMmMM aRT-
Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?
Ehh 8yrs? We met in hell school
Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?
Friendos
Mom
Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?
6..?? Aa idk theres some people that idk if they'd consider me a friend or not,,
Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?
Idk any compliment is best compliment for me,,
Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?
Ew yucky gröss
Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?
m y a r t
Also my hair bc its soft and wavy,,
Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?
Everything else-
Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?
Climb trees and do dumb shit
Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?
Same irl bestie i mentioned before
Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?
MmmmmmMMM,,,
Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?
MMMmMMmMMMMmmmMMm,,,,,,
Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?
Well I chose Fae bc i thought it sounded pretty
Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.
Idk what to rlly say lmao
Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?
Kinda the same but i had toys everywhere-
Also when i was like 5 i had this legit fucking cursed thomas the tank engine shaped bed that i actually found a pic of but it's FUCKING HORRIFYING SO I PROBS WONT SHOW HERE-
Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?
EW BEING A TEENAGER SUCKS ASS HOW DO I UNDO????
Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.
Hi mom ily ur epic
Onions: Tell about your dad.
Hi dad ily ur epic
Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.
Omg i miss my grannies sm bc i couldn't see em this year bc nasty pandemic
Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?
Haha shit memory gor brrRR-
I don't really remember too many specific parties but when i was like 7-10 i had these epic parties in those birthday places with the giant play areas
I kinda wish i wasn't too old to go to them sobs
Peony: What was your first job?
I haven't had a job yet
Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?
Hmmmm idk? I haven't really thought abt that but i don't really mind i just wanna find someone to vibe with,,
Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?
I cri
Pink: Where is home?
Home is home home
Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?
Now where do i start...
Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.
I look up to people that are kind, caring, brave, funny, cool or stronger than me ig?
Primrose: Describe your ideal life.
Basically my current life minus school, stress,pandemic and responsibilities lmao
Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?
I used to believe in ghosts after i thought i encountered one
Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?
Hermmmst
Rose: What’s your favorite sound?
Peoples laughsss also music
Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?
Bro i dont have one,, my aphantasia makes it hard for me to remember stuff-
Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?
A
Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?
I wantttt better chargersss thattt donttt telll meee thatt myyy tablett will finishh chargingg innn 1 dayy andd 7 hoursss
St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?
Kinda difficult but im opening up more
Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?
fRIENDS,,,,,wAh
Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?
8 hrs
Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?
Idk ig i kinda have to go to school and do stuff
Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?
Non existant
Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?
My black and white stripy top, and all my hoodiess
Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.
I don't think i have just one aesthetic bc im drawn to so many different aesthetics at the same time-
Like vintage, neon, dark, spoopy, pastel, cute, etc etc
Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?
OMG I LEGIT JUST SCREAM AT ANYTHING ANYONE GIVES ME-
IF SOMEONE GOES OUT OF THEIR WAY TO MAKE ME SMTH I CRY,,
Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?
🤏
Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?
I haven't been reading anythinggg
But i should really finish reading Percy Jackson bc it do be picking up dust-
Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?
Everywhere
Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?
Mmm yummy 👅
Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.
I am currently living and breathing yes
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Do you think Ludwig blamed Gilbert or was ashamed of Gilberts history after WW2 and that creating a big rift between them? I ask bc after ww2, it was Prussian culture that was blamed for Germany’s actions. And Germans rly distanced themselves from Prussian culture. So I can picture Lud just going off on Gilbert while they were East and West, saying how he should be ashamed of himself, that none of this would’ve happened if it weren’t for him, etc.
Yes! This is an important part of my headcanons about their relationship and the Cold War resolution of their conflict.I wrote before about how them being away from each other was actually a very healthy thing, especially for Ludwig, bc that’s the first time he got to be his own nation, and about how their relationship was pretty toxic thanks to Prussia’s issues. I’m gonna flesh it out here:
Ludwig was brought up in a pretty oppressive environment, when he felt his guardian’s love was conditional. And in a way it was, bc when Prussia created him, it was to consolidate his own power, not bc he wanted a little brother. Only later did the feelings show up and um ‘complicate’ things for Prussia. Like, a LOT. Due to this environment and the wordless implication that Lud has to be Just Like Prussia and a proxy for his power, Germany never really had the teenage rebellion most people have. He was just obedient and accepted the role Prussia gave him (which frustrated and angered other parts of the Empire). Their relationship was very codependent with Prussia in the role of the boss even tho Germany was technically the Empire. Prussia was the gray eminence that actually ruled and Germany reminded in a role of a child even tho he wasn’t one anymore and it was not healthy.
When the WWII blew into their faces, both of them had pretty intense feels about it: Prussia reacted like a very, very disappointed helicopter parent, the “You had ONE JOB” and “I WASTED so much on you!!” and “You were not worth the effort!”, pretty much all the awful stuff a narcissistic selfish parent could say to a kid that failed at being a doctor or a lawyer.
Germany on the other hand felt incredibly disillusioned and betrayed, he felt that all the stuff Prussia told him about the world was false or bad in some way. It was a pretty black-and-white thinking, because he was going through the ‘teenage’ rebellion he never got to have. It was a little late, but it came. Germany began crystallizing his own nation-hood in a way he never had and it went intense from one extreme to the other, when he started resenting Prussia and rejected everything related to him. With time, those emotions calmed down and turned into a much more mature self-reflection and self actualization, and he began building his own identity, but for many years, he was on the rageasourus of an upset teenager who was all his life told he needs to be a doctor, and ends up HATING it and failing at it and his parent is shitty to him bc of it. And he did say all the stuff you mention, yes, how it would not have happend if not Prussia and so on. It was a shitshow and they both managed to hurt each other’s feelings a lot. Still, under all that rage and hurt feels they missed each other, which made it harder to deal with, and were competing about who was the Better Germany. So their issues really show up in all of this.It was very much a parental-child dynamic, only bc their relationship was from the beginning rather toxic, this was also over the top and too hateful and mean. From both sides.
Today it’s way better. Germany is still very careful not to get his identity confused with Prussia’s but he is able to appreciate the good things his brother brought, stuff like the Prussian Year 2001 happen. He also sees all his brother’s faults with a sober eye now (all TON of them) but regained his respect for him, but it’s just not the same immature hero-worship that he got bitchslapped so hard out of.
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655321
hello all. good day.
I guess it's been a relatively regular sort of day.
I have not worked on any insurance stuff as of yet.
however.
well let's begin at the beginning.
my sister clomped ( is that a real word?) he way into the outpost at 11am this morning.
she called up stairs to tell the kids she had "hot coco" then proceeded to clomp up and down the stairs.
I woke up, and got my bearings, put my sleeping bag in the wash and proceeded to start my day.
I've been sleeping later these days because I dread waking up and having to deal with all the unpleasantness that comes with trying to get your life back on track after the nuclear holocaust that we've gone through the first few months of this year.
as I said in earlier posts. 2020 has been a real kick in the balls.
as always the video games fired up immediately.
I guess the goose had got up early to do his homework.
he walked up stairs as I was putting away the remnants of my sleeping apparatus away.
the first thing that I witness was my youngest nephew benny have a complete meltdown because he was stuck in a spot on a video game. ( he just didnt want to play that part. it was kind of a puzzle. he wasnt down with that.) he got his older brother " billy goat" ( I have nick names for all the kids.) to get him through it. apparently billy goat wasnt going fast enough for him ( he is 7 by the way. I'm talking about benny. billy goat is 17) so he starts complaining and telling him to hurry up. billy goat gets pissed off and tells him to do it himself. at this point benny throws a bolt, his face turns beet red and starts screaming "you do it" over and over again until my sister interceded. I called him a spoiled brat. I think at that point of the day I was just checking my email. it was one of the first experiences I had today.
next
I decided to try and tackle my health insurance problem. I called medical and they gave me option of a call back which I took. the called me about 20 minutes later the woman I spoke to got me sorted on my medical benefits. she told me to start an online account to send in some paper work that they need from my employer, unemployment, and a statement I have to write out regarding being laid off. after we got done with medical I inquired about calfresh and we started the application process. then the call dropped. there was a call back but it dropped again when I picked up. I decided to start the process of creating my online account. ( *rant alert* the people at social services are unsung heroes and on the front lines everyday. they save people's lives. and they get yelled at and treated badly. I dont envy thier jobs. imagine to have to tell some one who is in dire need and at probably one of the most desperate times in thier lives that they cant be helped because of some regulation or guideline that some rich Republican made to keep people from getting assistance. we are all moochers in thier eyes.)
I'm getting off track.
next I try and create my online account.
1. enter name
enter user name
enter email
enter email again
enter password
enter password again
enter security question 1
enter security question 2
enter security question 3
enter next
somthing goes wrong please re enter password.
re enters password
next
somthing goes wrong please re enter password
re enters password
next
something goes wrong.
removes unacceptable character from password
next
2. enter first name
enter middle initial
enter last name
enter mailing address
select security picture
name security picture
next check e mail
3. select link in email to activate account
enter user name
there is no account with that user name
enter user name
there is no account with that user name
repeat steps 1 and 2
repeat steps 1 and 2
repeat steps 1 and 2
calls social services
although you can read through that rather quickly. it took much longer than that.
it's nice when you fumble through things that you have never done before with virtually no instruction. I may just have thick skull syndrome.
in the mean time the aural assault continues.
I get my call back maybe an hour later and after much explanation i finish my application via phone.
I have to be transferred to another social worker to swear that I have told the truth. they recorded me swearing that I have told the truth. I was terrified that I would be disconnected at the transfer and made the social worker swear that she would call back to see if everything went okay.
she did.
I love her.
as that was going on my sister and the kids went to pick up a pizza order.
they came back with pizza and at that point I say "fuck it" I blow my whole diet to hell. if your gonna die, die with your boots on, right!? that's gonna be hard if I dont have any god damn feet to put in the boots. right?!? (that was rhetorical)
I do it anyways.
I then proceed to have 2 big glasses of coke.
I'm spiked.
I'm like a junky rushing on my run. ( a serious lou reed bite)
I dont care about all the noise or my nephew telling my sister that he isn't gonna spend an hour on his home work.
or the fact that goose doesn't even acknowledge the fact that I'm alive today.
yeah that happend too.
what's up his ass.
I got a good mind to adjust his attitude.
a hi dad, I love you dad would be nice. maybe even to venture as far as giving me a hug would be greatly appreciated.
it's not like I dont need one.
so now I'm going to force my sugar junky emotionally broken ass to start working on my insurance class.
the sonic reducer ain't no fuckin loser mother fucker.
if you dont understand what that means.
figure it out, tough shit.
sincerly
me.
king of the dogs
3/24/20
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