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ihave1braincell · 4 months

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Okay but why does the “sigma alpha wolf” dude have so much potential for a good OC???

Like, imagine wolf dude actually has schizophrenia, bipolar, psychosis, or some other hallucination inducing disorder???

Me and a friend were joking around. I was pretending to be the alpha wolf guy and she was my “kitten.”

…it ended up progressing to necrophilia and cannibalism. I’m actually here for it, though!

Now making art of this new found character of mine, Jacob 😓😓

—I’m getting into his story. Everything is fairly vague and just a summary of his lore, there’s still murder, gore, running away, delusions, hallucinations, necrophilia, cannibalism, and suicide—

Basically he deemed himself to be a red wolf alpha. He believed it with his whole heart, too. Recently, he found out that the red wolf population was growing after near extinction. He knew his role. He knew (had a delusion) that he was placed with his human parents so his species would be farther from extinction.

Now that red wolves were under protection and were growing… he knew it was him time to go. He ran away from his home, and started making his way to the red wolf reservation in Ohio. (He lives in Organ btw)

He was caught by the police, though. He believed his human girlfriend (“kitten”) was the one who reported him to the police and betrayed him. (He actually has no girlfriend that was another delusion)

When he was safely at home, he almost immediately suck out again. He went to his kitten’s house. (Remember, he has no “kitten.” This is just a poor random woman’s house (her husband was coincidentally away))

What follows next are taken directly from the joke messages between me and my friend:

“‘K-KITTEN??? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?? I THOUGHT WE WERE 4LIFERS!!’

‘WE-‘

‘WE WATCHED SKIBIDI TOILET TOGETHER, SANG THE SONG, DRANK GRIMACE SHAKES TOGETHER, ETC!!’

‘THIS IS NOT FUNNY!!’

*alpha me scratches you and you die*

‘W-WAIT, NO KITTEN!! I DIDNT MEAN TO! WAKE UP!! PLEASE!! NO!!!!! MY OHIO LEVEL THREE GYAT ONE TWO BUCKLE MY SHOE LIGHTSKIN STARE KITTEN!!’

‘NOOOOOOOOOOO!!’

‘IM SO SORRY!!!! WAKE UP, PLEASE!!’

‘… i hurt my kitten, the one i swore to protect no matter the cost. i'm so sorry kitten. daddy loves you.’”

The next message is very long and detailed so I’ll summarize it.

Alpha guy apologizes and kisses kitten “one last time”

Although this was meant to be a goodbye kiss, he can’t seem to stop. He looks at the cut his claws made (stab wound) and then looks at his paws (hands.) It felt so weird. Her blood on him and his fur (small strands of hair) on her body.

They were one… why did he do this? She was his other half, and he just killed her! Maybe… maybe this lust he felt for her dead corpse was his subconscious trying to regain its missing half…

*long story short he fucks the corpse*

He cleaned himself up, wanting to cry but that would be very un-alpha of him. He felt as empty as before. His half still wasn’t with her. Then… he got an idea. A way he could always be with his kitten.

He started slowly eating the corpse. Saying things like “don’t worry, kitten. We’ll be one soon.”

Of course, he threw up barely mid-way through. He tried eating his own vomit back up, then tried to proceed eating, but he just kept throwing up. He also knew that if he waited too long, he would have to take a dump. But at the same time… he was willing to eat his own shit to have his kitten inside him.

He ended up trying that idea, and guess what? He kept throwing up. He was already half-dead from food poisoning, and he finished himself off out of despair.

As he faded away into whatever you think is the aftermath of death, he looked at her face. The thing he was going to eat last. It was a face that wasn’t his kittens.

#alpha wolf #grrrrr #oc #story #sorry lol #funny

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onlineproblems · 10 months

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@jjohnnyutah okay I'm out of the shower. here goes, the xfiles word vomit

i wish i remembered more of season 1 and i guess 2 but i started watching like a year ago and i wasnt sure how i felt about it at the time and sort of half paid attention to the majority of the episodes. i plan to rewatch anyway but most of my excitement for the show peaked around mid-late season 2, when i felt like i knew what was going on (that didnt last) and i understood the dynamics between all the characters.

nobody could ever guess /s but i ADORE scully. i love and identify with her repressed catholic/survivors guilt and inability to express herself and the way she puts too much of herself into a quest that wasn't even hers to start with. and then finally opens up and leaves her shell and gets to be silly later in the show with a wry, dry humor that complements mulder's goofiness.

i think the baby arc is one of the dumbest things i've ever seen (not that i've seen all of it yet, but jesus it's so dumb). maybe it's because i'm a bitter childless hag but i dont relate to her intense desire to have children and i feel like when she got pregnant the writers absolutely mauled her personality to death. ffs they already put her through every other torture they could devise, why not a lobotomy? everyone knows motherhood makes you weak-willed and stupid. i mean im exaggerating but it's because the anger is fresh lol.

I'm so so scared to watch the revival because i don't want it to warp my nostalgic understanding of the characters. i love them and want them to live forever in a little bubble in Vancouver, fighting the moth men (yes that ep was so good) and getting up to shenanigans while CSM and Krycek does his incompetent bullshit off to the side.

I've seen several people talk about Jewish Mulder and i think the idea makes a lot of sense, and didn't they even reference it a time or two in the show? like the ep with the golem? i got mad when they gave him a Christian burial lol.

i like mulder's appreciation for the beauty in the weird and how he doesn't give a shit for what anyone thinks of him except Scully. i like that he's so wrapped up in the wonders out there but is also staunchly atheistic.

i didn't want Samantha's disappearance to be solved because it seemed like such a trite ending to mulder's trauma and the ultimate mystery in his life. i guess it was a good enough solution, but her abduction was what fueled him and gave him meaning and to wrap it up with a bow felt...idk, dismissive almost. i wanted closure for him but not necessarily answers. if your life's meaning is to search for answers, and suddenly you can have all the answers to the universe, where do you find meaning then? I may not be making sense lmao

and i think that's when i enjoy the x files most, when it's not trying to package things all neatly. maybe it's trying to ask a question, or maybe it's just trying to have fun, or both, but it's not trying too hard. the mythology is too much for me and frankly detracts from my enjoyment of... it. they wanted something epic and mysterious and then couldn't make any sense out of their own cryptic bullshit.

self-contained episodes like clyde bruckman, asking a question about determinism and big stuff like that without getting preachy or condescending, are excellent.

there's a hundred other things i could say but... that's enough for now lol.

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cassthefrassreviews · 2 years

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Wednesday- Netflix Show Review (spoilers duh)

Alright, i watched the show. Did i like it? Eh!! Will i still participate in fandom? Yes!

Show rating: 3 stars??

Right off the bat you can tell the only good actor in this show is the main character. Jenna Ortega 100% did this role amazingly, and was my second favorite character (first being Thing ofc). Everyone elses acting ranged from mid to just straight up not good? Not to mention like jesus the cast either looks 12 or late 20s, is this highschool, middle school or college?? And dont get me started on the MAIN MALE LEADS ACTING??? Tyler played by Hunter Doohan, deadass sounds like a shitty anime dub protagonist. And by GOD did that get on my nerves. I will say either the acting is better or more tolerable by the end of the season but thats most likely due to the fact the screen time mainly shifts onto the main character Wednesday. Which im fine with.

I love Wednesday, i love her so much. She is so autistic coded, just like me for real. Jennas portrayal is amazing. Line delivery, body language, everything down to the tea for amazing it was.

The writing...... yeah the writing..... yeah no..... Its not great, it feels like they only focused on making Wednesdays lines good and give 0 shits about anyone else. Some moments are great i wont lie, but alot of the writing comes off as???? Eh??? And the actors definitely didnt help carry the writing. Maybe with a different cast, it wouldn't have been so hard to watch.

The show starts off with a very strong pallet of "how do you do, fellow kids?" and honestly has one of the worse hooks ive ever seen. Social media being shoved down are throats and a couple of ad placements throughout the first episode, i was expecting a full on "HEY BUY THE LATEST IPHONE, EAT SOME DORITOS AND SHOP AT OLD NAVY" type of ads like the Addison Rae movie. Like oooooooooooof, thankfully they tone that down, but its still very obvious in some scenes.

SPOILERS BELLOW

Shows like this always make me feel weird where they have "outcast" "normie" type stuff. And yeah it was.... ?????? Man idk lmao. This show did alot of stereotypes and ???? stuff?? throughout it, that was honestly very weird? Like for example Enid isnt able to transform into a werewolf, and her mom wants to send her to.... wait for it.... CONVERSION THERAPY??? Are we serious??? And its like this long awkward scene that felt like a coming out scene of her turning down conversion therapy, and her mom storming out and her dad saying how proud he is and he will always support her....... like deadasss???? AND THEN!!! SHE ENDS UP "WOLFING OUT" AT THE END ANYWAYS????? So like are you serious??? They dealt with it like it was a coming out thing and it was a puberty thing and alsoa disability, so that was icky!!!

A HUGE ICK IS IN THE ENDING???? We find out what a hyde is and all of a sudden Wednesday finds out that Tylers mom, oh my god, was a HYDE!!! So she confronts him and let me just quote this scene for yall"

Wednesday: "Her postpartum depression triggered her condition"

Tyler: "My mom has severe bipolar disorder."

Wednesday: "We both now thats a lie..... She was a Hyde"

LIKE DID WE REALLY???? DID WE REALY JUST COMPARE A SEVERE MOOD DISORDER TO A CREATURE???? IN THE SHOW A HYDE IS DESCRIBED AND "UNLEASHED" By this: "artists by nature, but equally vindictive in temperament.” He wrote: “Born of mutation, the Hyde lays dormant until unleashed by a traumatic event or unlocked through chemical inducement or hypnosis."

Like???? what we arent going to do is compare an already severely stigmatized disorder to a literal monster. That is so fucked up??? On so many levels????

There were a couple good moments in the show, and i did really like watching the friendship between Enid and Wednesday blossom. Any scene with Thing was good and also the scenes with Eugene were pretty adorable. I do enjoy the way she does investigate and the mystery aspect is semi solid. Her visions are also portrayed very well and i like them. The fight scenes i would say are pretty well choreographed.

Wednesday has alot of autistic / neurodivergent traits, along with alot of the other characters and that is very fun to watch. Because omg me? Very relatable! Does put the whole "outcast" "normie" thing in a weird perspective tho huh?

Anways would i watch it again? No

Will i watch the second season? Yeah probably!!

Do I recommend it? EH??? If you can get through the first two episode and look past the cringey/ unbearable acting, then yeah go ahead. Its only 8 episodes, i finished it in a day, so if you just want the show in the background or youre bored sure. Again there are some captivating scenes but honestly none that are very hooking to me.

Anyways thats my review !!!

#wednesday #netflix wednesday #wednesday series #wednesday 2022 #netflix #review #show review #wednesday review #the adams family #adams family

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transinclusionary · 9 months

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Were you the person cosplaying as a transwoman when you are AFAB? Because that's just sick af. I've seen post circulate around you - I just came here because I recently followed you ... and .. now .. Idk ..

I used to used to refrain from confirming my gender with anybody, due to how uncomfortable I was about my gender being a talking point online. I have always struggled with my gender identity. The idea of people focusing more on what's under my clothes instead of the content of my character really bothered me. I believed that since people often call out racism without people assuming they belong to the group they're advocating for, that I could do the same for transphobia. Oppression is not comparable, however, and I realized that this did not work for these discussions. If I am to effectively advocate against terfs and for trans people, I then need to use my privilege as being cis passing in discussions. I don't really love people online knowing my gender, because I dont really know my gender either. But this feeling is the exact same thing trans women constantly go through: the feeling that their gender is constantly subjected to ridicule by any random you encounter, both online and IRL.

I have never said that I was a trans women, merely deflected whenever someone asked me about it. In retrospect, it was a selfish thing to do that I definitely regret. I started this blog as a teenager and it's aged with me to mid twenties. If I could, I would go back and re-do some interactions. The mistakes have been uncomfortable but necessary learning lessons for me. I learned I can not effectively advocate if I keep my gender a secret, because it means I refuse to do the same thing that trans people are expected to do.

I wish I could go back and state what my gender was when it mattered. I didnt know entirely how to classify myself, however, so I redirected any attempts to talk about my gender identity because I myself didnt want to think about it. I dont feel cis, but I also dont feel trans, so how can I tell someone what my identity is if I dont know it myself? However, since my gender identity will never be a trans woman, it wont hurt me to confirm with people as much.

I came to the conclusion that I can not have both my ambiguous gender identity and be a terfexclusionist. I chose to sacrifice the comfort of my ambiguous gender identity, in solidarity with trans people who are expected to disclose. Unfortunately, the world we live in is that we are representatives for our gender (which I think is bs). We all deserve to live as individuals and not spend our short lives worrying about how our life will influence the collective's public perception on others who share a gender identity. Unfortunately, this not how the world operates, especially not online as it pertains to trans people. You speak for members of your gender identity when you're anything other than cis, heterosexual, and endosex. Instead of selfishly denying the reality that trans people are forced to be model minorities, I instead adapted my advocacy to better fit this unfair aspect of life. If trans people are forced to cater to cis people's comforts for their safety, it should be up to cis passing people to (safely) show to cisendosex people that it's not just trans people who care about this. This is obviously a fine line, as you dont want to advocate in a way that might cause more violence than it helps. I'm still figuring out the best way to do that. I make mistakes, unfortunately I am not perfect nor will I ever be. But the mistakes help me learn who I want to be, and not starting this blog with everyone knowing my gender was one of those mistakes.

You're right, cosplaying as trans women is disgusting, I've seen it both IRL and online. It pushes trans people out of spaces designed for them, and that's something I would never want to do. However, my refusal to confirm my identity should not mean people just assume I'm a trans woman. I do not believe trans people should exclusively be expected to call out terfs. It means that cisendo people are not doing their jobs as allies to use their priviledge to call out bigotry.

I never started this blog thinking anyone would actually follow me or even have opinions about me. I definitely did not think "terfexclusionist" or "transinclusionary" would be followed by anyone other than my best friend. This blog initially started because of my (admittedly) unhealthy anger about the absolute refusal of terfs to admit that they are doing is wrong. To this day, the rhetoric that terfs spew almost brings me to tears of frustration. The LGB community makes me want to pull out my hair and scream. This is why I often take extended breaks from this blog. I still probably can develop a healthier way to cope with the anger. I want to do something to help this epidemic, but I'm just one person. I just want to do the right thing, but it is often unclear about what is the right thing to do. This is why I appreciate having my followers give me feedback, both positive and negative, as it allows me to introspect.

If you want to remain followed, that's fine, but do not feel pressured to. Life is way too short to continue following someone you dont feel comfortable with. I am always open to any suggestions, criticisms, and concerns by both anon and DM. This goes for both you, anon, and any other of my followers. Please never hesitate to reach out. I appreciate you (and all my follower) for caring about doing the right thing and keeping me on the straight and narrow. Have a good day.

#also jsyk im not at all comfortable with being referred to as AFAB #im absolutely certain you were wanting to be as inclusive with your language but i dont like being called that #especially when someone is criticizing me #to me it is just a nicer way of saying 'you have a vagina' which makes me want to retreat into a hole and die #it's the same as AMAB #please use these terms sparingly #and not at all when you're referring to me #i have a similar relationship with poc where i think it's a nicer way of saying 'colored person' since im descendant of american slaves #i should definitely put it somewhere visible on my blog to please refrain from AMAB AFAB and POC when talking to me #people have been very understanding to me about me accidentally forgetting to tag q slur reclaimed and i really want to continue that #not mad at all!#this is jsyk #ask answered #radfem mention #terf mention #radfem tw #terf tw #cissexism tw #cissexism mention #q slur mention #transmisogyny mention #transmisogyny tw #transphobia tw #transphobia mention #this post literally took an hour and a half to type because my phone died half way through and i had to retype #🥴

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olivieraa · 5 months

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I went to bed really upset last night

I think there was a variety of factors that made me into a bit of an emotional mess after finishing attack on titan

Its like "its just an anime" or "its just a show"

Firstly, it was the anime/show that's been in my life the longest. 2013-2023. I associate a lot of my tumblr posts with the show. I called any character Kaji Yuki voiced in any other anime 'Eren' for fun. My time watching the first season is so vivid to me. I remember so much about analysing this show, and talking about it with friends.

Secondly, due to my OCD, the O stands for obsessive, and that connects to a lot of things, but its extremely hard to get me out of my Obsessive mode. I actually planned to make this rewatch last a couple of months. I was like "ah yeah Ive seen season 1 three or four times so its not gonna be that entertaining watching it again, I'll try watch a few a day". ...That didn't happen. I dont know why or how, but season 1 felt v different to me. I still got chills, I still got shocked when something happened, I would finish an ep and have the urge to scream from the adrenaline that went through me when something intense happened before a cliffhanger, almost as if I didnt know what was gonna happen next.

The reason I put off watching the show immediately after it ended is bc I'm aware this happens to me and its hard to get out of it. In my head I thought my obsessive nature wouldn't come around until I got to season 3 which I hadn't seen before and I thought I'd get to season 3 by mid-January. But from the absolute get-go, it kicked in, and from 7pm on the 21st of Dec to 4am on 26th of Dec, I binged the absolute fuck out of the show, taking breaks to do essential things like eat and shower. I barely slept.

So needless to say, I've only just come back to reality.

Third, I'm emotional af. Stories impact me on a really high scale, and I start to get stomach aches and chest pains bc of it. Esp if the story is magnificent. I finished that show last night and when I saw "The end", I was still crying, I hurt all over, and I just happened to be lucky that a friend who has seen it (and shockingly, doesn't watch anime) replied back to me and we talked about for a little bit. It helped to rant it out a bit but my sleep deprivation caused me to make so many typos and I officially had to sleep, which was hard, due to the chest pains.

And fourth, I believe what I just watched was perfection. To ever rewatch the show again, I'll see everything differently. Everything. The first 5 seconds of the show will be different. And when I'd had that realisation, I started crying again.

Like, I'm thinking of moments in the show that are literally just "characters swinging around and slashing titans" which is what the show was first known for, and now I'll be thinking "holy shit, these scenes have a bigger significance than you realise".

And for a show that's not about romance, the romantic tragedy that ties it all together, is what got me more than anything.

If this show gave off a vibe that the creator never knew where he was going with it, then I dont think it would be as impactful. As someone who loves Stranger Things, not everything ties up perfectly. And maybe the creators had an idea of their ending and then had to figure out how to get there, but it doesn't show. I've a feeling that by the end of that show, I'll be thinking that they ran through different drafts for their ending and finally settled on one and brought back a few tiny moments from the other seasons that ties it in and boom, done.

But almost every moment of attack on titan comes full circle, to the extreme point that I believe he wrote this whole thing out, almost every millimetre of it, and then released it at a specific pace up until recent years, and then obviously the anime adapted it. Yes he could have made slight changes along the way like "I originally wanted this character to say this line but changed it to this character cause it was more fitting" or something like that, but nothing that would really change anything about the direction he was heading with it.

Do I regret binging it? Yes, bc I have loads to do that I now have get stuck into with v little breaks (SnK was SUPPOSED to be my breaks), but also, mainly, bc I felt like I was there. Like when you're away from home for a month and you come back and everything feels weird and sorta wrong. So that's a learning lesson to myself. Never binge again.

Last time I did that was with Succession, but I'm just lucky that Obsessive mode kicked in about 20 eps in (so the first 20 I watched one a day), and so when Obsessive mode came in, it was for the second set of 20 episodes).

Unlike SnK where I watched almost 100 eps in 5 days :')))

Anway, I'll be thinking about this fucking show for a while, especially Eren. Especially Eren. He's just too complex, and I like to analyse, and that's some long analysation.

Also Mikasa and Levi impacted me too (Hange is my girl tho).

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, I'm glad I wrote this out. My thoughts are going through my head way too fast for my typing to keep up so I've had to slow down my thoughts and so my breathing is a little better this time around lmao

I'ma miss this show, and I look forward to the day I rewatch it and take every speckle of the show in again. Knowing my ass, it'll be on my next break which is sooner than I'd like it to be, cause I know what my addictive obsessive ass is like. Ugh, I'm a wreck

#even that gif is upsetting T_T

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iristhedeadflower · 2 years

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violetta season two: final thoughts

hiiiiiii. so. season two is over huh. damn. what the hell!!!! this feels like the end of an era. i started s2 in march and finished just the other day which...i think doesn't reflect well enough just how much i think this is technically the best season of the show. the plotlines are powerful, the characters go through real growth and are interesting, and it's actually unpredictable! there are plot twists, people! so. lets go through it like we did the first time: storylines, characters, ships, songs. you ready? i sure am(n't)

storylines

alright, so, let's get this out of the way: this season's villains are easily among the most multifaceted characters of the series. there is no "big baddie", in my opinion everything feels very real. the conflicts are human and the choices the characters make (not all the characters but we'll get there) feel grounded and sensical to their development. so much so that when you take these season's new villains (diego, esmeralda) and compare them to the regular s1 ones (ludmila, jade) you definitely feel that...you're watching a show that is growing up with its audience, you know? like you KNOW how much i love my girls but there's a tone shift there that is hard not to notice. despite all the new cast introductions and just how much we are working with, the season never feels particularly stuffy, and for one reason or another i found myself enjoying most of the plotlines. my glaring, impossible to ignore issue was with the jeremias storyline. it completely ruined that middle of the season and i didn't feel the desire to continue watching as much because of it. fortunately i stuck through it once and i can do it again, still...mid-season 2 is not exactly my favourite. despite this, first and last 15-20 episodes? i love them sm. the first ones bc the campiness of s1 gradually shifts into something else (and im not here saying s2 isn't campy but, you get me) and it has some absolutely stellar episodes in my opinion (the sleepover? fran's birthday???? though i think that's further than first 20 but we'll let it slide). and the last ones just bc i love the conclusions this season has for the characters: gregorio and diego, violetta and struggling to find her love for music again, ludmila and the weight of her actions starting to weigh down on her...it's (you guessed it!) a lot for my little heart!!!

(just bc i want to mention it, the racism plotlines were really not it though. the Chinese restaurant was in no way, shape or form influential to the plot so completely unnecessary stereotypes. and well, we all know why the esmeralda/german wedding was edited so. awful awful awful, but still, we should acknowledge it exists as much as it sucks. yikes.)

characters

last time i didnt properly introduce this, but i think with such a big ensemble we should divide the characters into three categories: hall of fame (my besties, my best friends, the yassiests), hall of shame (disappear off the face of the earth immediately or face my wrath rn), and in memoriam (one time thing, but we love you anyway). characters i don't mention are just the ones i have nothing to say about.

onto the hall of fame!

vilu stays a likeable and real main character once more. like im sorry i do not get the s1-2 vilu hate she is literally the main character???? like do you want the plot to just stay stale forever??? of course she's gonna make questionable choices! what are we even talking about. but my baby goes through SO MUCH this season, from angie to german to diego one right after the other like it was getting capital b Bad for my capital b Bestie there and im so so glad she found herself again in the end. her growth is so admirable, so much so that then s3 happens and everyone's like ???? but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

i have previously mentioned how i thought fran didn't get to shine properly in s1 due to a certain annoying whiny pissbaby nobody misses, but HELLO????? s2 opens the door for a much funnier, smarter and, let's face it, better character. i LOVE fran, she's one of my favourite characters! she gets her boytoy this season and it's what she deserves!!! and i love the fact that she canonically gets recognition from people around her for her voice because. HELLO. HER VOICE. ma'am i am completely head over heels for you. my Italian sister i ALWAYS said that

cami stays in this section. no need to explain why. i am so mad she gets so screwed over in the love department, but she is so so funny and the traffic light book was so 😭😭😭 when i stop and think about it realistically, i am probably personality-wise the most like cami, so i love to see that unhinged chaos...makes me feel represented yknow. well. i mean.

if we're talking chaos. let's open up this discussion. is ludmila ok? do we as a society need to create a trust fund to get this girl to therapy? probably. does she remain the most entertaining, off-the-rails, pathetic little bitch of the series? like why are you even asking me that. i said it in my s1 post, ill say it here: you can't like violetta as a show and not like ludmila. unfortunately she gets shot directly into your DNA and you cannot possibly escape from her. no matter how much you try. NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY. i need this girl's confidence. i need her mentality in life cause this girl is always so sure she is the smartest in the room and it cannot be further from the truth and im sorry it is SO SO funny help. s3 is a rollercoaster for her so i am glad she's getting some rest rn. she'll need it.

speaking of characters you can't not like, naty remains my skrunkly ever. my babygirl. my little baby. i love her in ways the human mind will never understand. i want her to destroy me. she's in her emancipation era and i am cheering from the sidelines. she is MY hero. she is MY queen. she gave me the finest jealousy plotline she could. she gave me that damn drums scene and...lord have mercy on my soul. the best. THE best

leon, you, my man, are a powerful bitch. you are THAT bitch and you know it. iconic, spectacular, not ever been done before. he is the bi representation we always deserved. he is currently raising all of your standards and doing it flawlessly. nothing else to say. stay totally mental for us

and diego complements that perfectly. he is the insufferable bitch to leon’s irritability and he is unstoppable and he is a menace to society and i hate him and he is a lot but like. he is OUR trash raccoon yknow. like he is the worst but we collectively decided to leave food out the door so he doesn’t have to keep ravaging our bins. you get what i mean.

marco is here everyone clap!!!! pathetic meow meow!! this boy is wonderful he is corny as all hell but he is so sweet. and i love him dearly. i love this for us as a society we needed a marco i think.

angie…now i’m going to say something controversial yet brave cause you KNOW i love angie so so much…but i think she should’ve stayed in france THERE I SAID IT. i’ll come back to this when i get to it in s3 but i really don’t like how after a while her plot is only exclusively jeremias/german related. with the decision to leave her life behind (and with that the toxic mindset that was keeping her trapped) the fact that she comes back in s3 and goes down THAT route again...is just very sad to me. i think she should've maybe come back for a few episodes in s3, slay the house down and put german in his place as she always does, and then keep living her best life in France.

jade has done NOTHING WRONG EVER. NOTHING WRONG EVER!!!!!! SAY IT WITH ME NOTHING. WRONG. EVER. good, let's move on.

gregorio gets the most memorable arc in the shape of a mid-life crisis that culminates in somehow becoming the best dad in the series. and we love to see it! my absolute beloved and once again, rodrigo pereira gives his most and i can only watch in awe. i don't trust people who don't like gregorio it has to be said.

parodi i am so sorry. i am so so sorry. you have no idea how sorry i am. i guess it happens to the best of us.

antonio is as always the only sane man in a world of crazy people. iirc at a certain point someone tells him (maybe dufre but im not sure) that he should open a whole new studio with new teachers and he's like. ABSOLUTELY NOT THIS IS MY CIRCUS!!! antonio my absolute beloved i am treasuring all the time I've got left with you because i love you so so much

and to no one's surprise, my favourite stays and will stay my queen, my legend, my moment, miss lena vidal. everyone clap for lena. she gets her 3-4 fun little episodes, brings the house down with her vocals, reads EVERYONE to filth and just leaves again. the MVP. THE MVP!!!!!

and now, the hall of shame. but like it's always the same three men so.

german has no excuse to do the shit he does this season. and you'd think after the jeremias fiasco he like, chills down and learns from his mistakes?? absolutely not, he makes scenes in front of HER DAUGHTER'S CLASSMATES bc she won a contest and is travelling to another country. he wants to hire a BODYGUARD???? WTF???? unforgivable piece of garbage who needs to get as far from his daughter as humanly possible. your little piano moment won't work with me old man! you are a menace to society!!! get help!!!!!

i think we all agree with the fact that we should lock matias in a jail cell and lose the key. gaslighter gatekeeper manipulator mansplainer. AND HE GETS A HOT GIRLFRIEND????? UNDESERVEDDDDDD.

it's not marotti's worst season but i am a marotti hater so he should be included here. what are you gonna do, sue me? make me sign an NDA?

unfortunately pablo has to be moved to this section for this season. he is insufferable and rude and uncaring towards the people who need him the most and does absolutely nothing to fix or recognise his mistakes??? he gets a little better in the end but he is so nonsensical and suchhh a hypocrite. wdym angie can't leave because of family emergencies but jeremias can come and go as he pleases???? ASS!

dufre irritates me so im putting him here too

in memoriam of my sweet princesses:

lara, you were just a cool little mechanic. got swept up in probably the messiest couple drama of buenos aires and we respect you so much for leaving we really do, you deserve the world. esmeralda, MY GOD WHAT A SMART AND LAYERED CHARACTER. i am unapologetically in love with you. you were not campy enough to survive the season i fear. still waiting for your epic revenge plan against the lafontaines, i would love to see it. i so so wish we had an update on you- i wish you and your messy iPad kid the best. and jackie...you did not deserve s2 pablo i am so sorry. in the end, you probably only wanted the best for your uncle. were you still unnecessarily mean at times? yeah but i mean, you looked hot during it so. ok but for real i don't like how they just get rid of her character because they clearly had no idea what to do with her anymore, and she gets to be the "crazy girlfriend" when she had every right to be doubtful of pablo's relationship with angie!!!! jackie i see you i understand you and i love you. we'll meet again some sunny day but PLEASE stop doing that weird jump dance move it haunts my nightmares i swear. ana, every day i remember you're not a fever dream i have to stop and think about it. you, YOU are the undisputed chaos god.

ships

let's as always start with canon (as in happened during the season), and then non-canon (it was real TO ME).

leonetta remain as always THE canon ship for me. as much as i can not enjoy or care for side ships and endgames, leonetta always always set the standard and my god......the lengths these two will go to for each other is impressive yall. impressive. they're everything. and once again, im enjoying them before s3 comes and destroys them again.

also dieletta is there! it's a ship i enjoy exactly with what it is: it has its sweet moments but...diego was the antagonist of the season. that was the whole point. they have an interesting run and they ARE cute but the way they break it off it's pretty much impossible for me to imagine them ever working together in a romantic environment again. am i explaining myself correctly? probably not. whatever, you get it.

on the note of enjoying a ship for what it is, leonara had a good run too. i felt even more with my rewatch that lara knows that leon's heart is never truly in it, though, and that makes me feel so sad for her. she truly deserves better - not in the sense that leon wasn't a good boyfriend for her, simply because she doesn't deserve to be plunged in the middle of the messiest exes to lovers plotline ever.

marcesca i enjoy even only because fran gets someone GOOD who loves her and her only. but they're cute too so i actually enjoy them a lot. HE LEARNED ITALIAN FOR HER. HE FLEW TO MADRID FOR HER. omg their HUGSSSSS. you two will always have a special place in my heart.

fuck it, i'll say it: late brodmila s2 rights!!! those last few episodes with their over-the-top antics, from the "let's pretend we don't know each other" act to the trials (?????) to them just finally accepting how they're so different but similar at the same time??? AND THAT HUG AT THE END???? im not ready to talk about it actually its a lot. i found myself liking cami/seba in this rewatch, too, but the way they conclude that storyline absolutely sucks and though i do not enjoy s3 brodmila in my head i pretend everything is alright at the moment. once again, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

naxi are once again really cute! good for them happy for them! i won't go too much into it just cause i don't wanna start anything, but i don't really like their back and forth at the end of the season and how maxi goes from trusting to not trusting her one ep to the other. still. good for them happy for them.

fedemila are also really cute! i think i realised my problem with them is just that i don't like nor care for fede as a character very much 😭 he does a lot and is SO nice and supportive and we thank him for his service but idk. i tried really hard this time around but i still am completely neutral about him. sorry to this man. thank you for giving us the binary star metaphors though, that was absolutely epic of you. ludmila was READY right there in the fish tank i still find that so funny

and hey. let me mourn caxi for a second. i am the self proclaimed number one caxi enjoyer and i like to live in my little bubble of whatifs. they were something don't you think so. roaring twenties tossing pennies in the pool. and if my wishes came true.........it would've been caxi endgame OR AT LEAST A BETTER STORYLINE. DO IT PROPERLY OR DONT DO IT AT ALL!!!!!

german and matias ships deserve absolutely no rights and thus i won't speak about them. on the same note, pablo/jackie too. im sorry, she deserved better.

onto the non-canon and hey, i know what you're here for.

nothing else to say. NEXT!

s2 is referred as THE franletta season and damn it you are all so right for that. the babygirls. the besties. they love each other so, so much. the Italy storyline was A LOT. fran couldn't bear thinking of her life without vilu AND VILU DID EVERYTHING TO KEEP FRAN WITH HER AND FRAN CAME TO HER FIRST WHEN SHE KNEW SHE WAS STAYING!!!!! they're wonderful. they're magical. they're perfect and they're holding hands rn

oh, have to mention: fran/ana? i am intrigued. i would like to see it. the vision has opened itself to me and i am visioning it. we shall see.

cadmila gave me a lot this season and i have to thank them anyway cause they're always on my mind for one reason or another but shh. let's all pretend they hate each other and didn't make out on stage during 2x80 si es por amor (which we very conveniently didn't get to see. hmm.)

shoutout to the biest couple ever dieleon. OHO, BISEXUALITY WON INDEED. it's about the touches, the nods, the tension, the stares, and no one told you to get that close to each other yknow. but that's your thing you do you kings.

jadangie have little to no interaction this season but hey, if us jadangie truthers had to go off of canon interactions only we would be nowhere right now. however, shoutout to the greats of this season! jadesmeralda (who i love love love and think of constantly) and angie/jackie (hard to keep in mind that they're not canonically exes). and also, because i thoroughly enjoy jade stealing the toxic men in her life's women, jarodi. it was good for me as a jade enjoyer this season.

songs

i must've said it a million times by now but it begs repeating: season 2 is, UNDOUBTEDLY, the best season music-wise. i LOVE these songs to bits. not even close. but let me illustrate this in a tier list because my feelings are many and my braincells are few. (please not that even the ones i put at the bottom i still love lol yes the season is that good)

in conclusion: season two is one hell of a season. i knew i was gonna have my fun with it and aside from a couple of issues i definitely did. and i hope you had your fun too following along! just to put things in perspective, i have around 580 posts tagged for s1 and nearly 1k for s2 💀 and oh my friends, my friends...imagine how s3 will be for me. im looking forward to it in the way that im going to be completely insane over it, and i mean it. COMPLETELY.

but for now, this is iris violetta s2: electric boogaloo, signing off 🫡

#iris violetta s2: electric boogaloo #my god. the end of an era #you are NOT ready for my s3 hashtag #but i dont think i am either #thank you for following me through these dark times #hope i made you smile :)#see you soon #with the real last s2 post #and then ill be gone for a bit #AND THEN THE S3 FUN WILL COMMENCE #violetta

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piercedpressure · 2 years

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how has deja evolved over the years? i swear she gets redesigned like every few months /pos lol

LMAOOO ud be right cause shes changed stories each year (im painfully indecisive), this year is the only story ive genuinely been interested in exploring since i finally landed on a genre i think would fit her best? and i consider her redesigns to be a sort of progression into how ive grown as a writer and maybe as a person since shes been with me for so long lmao

ill place this under read more cause ill go into condensed detail about her evolution for her characterization, her design, and a small timeline for her story contexts but tl;dr shes grown so much and has gotten way more complex. i love her so much

2017-early 2018: she actually started out as a sona concept! design wise, nothing really special tbh, i was throwing stuff i really liked. for 2017, she was just a throwaway concept, but i was rapidly improving towards the end of that year...

mid-2018: ... that i ended up reusing her concept as a character concept, and during that year, i made an au with a friend that spiraled into something that lasted about the next 2 years, that then included her as one of the main characters LMAO. i wanted to draw crazy hair and also a cute mask, so i did. i ended up making it so that the masks were to both hide her identity (shes a fugitive in the au) and to be some sort of metaphor. her personality was very outwardly sweet, but she could also kill you so it best to not get on her bad side, but she was also in a constant learned helplessnes. big deja year

2019: design wise, i removed the mask, made her fatter (despite me not knowing how to draw fat people yet), and made her sorta baby-faced, since her character is a lot more childish during this bit? story wise, her story was included in an anthology about different kinds of love in a post-apocalyptic fantasy world. during this time, i was going through a Lot mentally, and it sorta marked the beginning of a really horrible period in my life thats still kind of ongoing, so i used her story in a more experimental sense so i can figure out different workarounds in an escapist way? this is also when i started pairing her with her now-partner-in-stories, lualhati, and from this point, lulu and deja are inseparable

2020: for this year, i was sorta putting her story off? i was really struggling to figure out what to do with it other than the deja/lulu love story, but at the same time, that marked me going through a journey of adding fat people to my work. dejas always been small fat, but her body hasnt actually been drawn well enough. we all start from somewhere though. she was a lot more calm in this version, and is sort of a leader figure for a village in a fantasy world. but i wasnt really feeling it.........

2021: last year was when i really started digging deep into what i wanted to do. i wanted weird gay trans cathartic art. so dejas story was that. still wasnt really feeling it, but u can tell i was really experimenting trying to land on something i was passionate about. while i did like her design since its a turning point in my art, and its visually loud (the color palette, holy shit), IT WAS SO HARD TO DRAW? i understand that 2021 me was really going at it with very loud and distinct designs, but the reason why i didnt even draw her for months after was because she was so fucking hard to draw. and i didnt put enough effort to portraying her fatness (which will soon become a very important aspect of her character). but were about to pull a gamer move

2022: up until now, since 2018-2019, i wasnt really satisfied with her story. it didnt really fit what i wanted, bc i was mostly concerned with how other people would react if i talked about them, especially since deja/lulu have always been very personal to me. but i had a vision. where deja and lulu are in a revenge drama thriller in a city in the middle of nowhere. and i havent stopped thinking about it day and night ever fucking since. i brought back a lot of elements from past designs (mostly cause i thought theyd look great, i was right), and im finally getting to a point where im figuring out how i draw fat people. now, dejas characterization came really easy to me (hypervigilent, short-tempered, mysterious, a second away from realizing shes trans). her story explores themes surrounding violence, secrets, and suffocating marriages, and while its a far heavier story than the past ones, its the first time ive been genuinely excited to see how its grown. i could ramble about this all day lol

deja is a growing character and she keeps getting better and better every time im exploring her, and she genuinely means the world to me. thank u for reading this if u have decided to read this

#i started answering this at 9 pm and now its midnight hi. im possessed by ocs #if u actually do read this i encourage questions about deja and lulu cause their storys been sitting in my brain for a week now oops #deja (deja/lulu)#also hi icarus my friend seven :o) hope ur doing alright #hyperfixings

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rollie-rolerson · 7 months

Text

What I'm going to work on for Dawn

November 6th, 2023 - started writing at 12:47 AM

*text marked with an asterisk indicates an update as of November 19th as I had this draft for some time)

(going to start logging more stuff, kind of practicing writing the dates even if it does that for me already :P)

Some unnecessarily lengthy and probably pointless context, you can just skip to the blue header

I worked on a LOT of my personified spacecraft. They just aren't here because I've been doing this since mid 2021, so they're on my DeviantArt account.

(I have a lot of fun posing. Not so much fun rendering for eons hehe)

But, it's almost 2024! And with the experience I gained since I started on the first ones (Perseverance/Curiosity; they used the same model) and a few other non-spacecraft, why not do it all again?

Honestly, really from scratch. Not only would it be difficult to add onto, change, or reuse previous content, but I also want to preserve the original files as they were + I work using procedural and manual rigging with Cloudrig now.

(There is an exception where I may use Perseverance/Curiosity (just the mesh parts). I updated them in 2022, and they also still share the same model. I archived their older models.)

I have practiced Cloudrig with Scorpius, who I finished not too long before I started working on Dawn.

Continuing on that, I decided to settle on a new land and began chipping away at Dawn. This time I've got a lot more considerations to keep in mind and I'm taking all the time I have.

In fact, she's not actually finished by the time of writing, hehe aren't I a little procrastinator /lh

so, what next?

WELL I'M GLAD YOU DIDNT ASK :D /j

1. Extra facial options for conveying expressions

The older rigs have options for stuff like creases and a sort of "tint". I call it a tint, but it is really just blushing. An important thing is that it functions as a color-changing mood indicator for intense emotions

Dawn, for example, would blush (or tint) yellow in a very happy state, or from platonic feelings

Then there's blue for an intense state of sadness

A new thing I could is stuff like. Agh I don't know what theyre called but yknow how angry characters may have those red lines to represent a vein, or scared/shocked characters have those pale blue/white lines around their heads???? whatever thats called, yeah I might do that lol

2. Closing/opening the eyes

A LOT of the eyes are done within procedural texturing. Her eyelids are not actually masked by any mesh. I currently have a few bones to close the eyes but they kind of crowd the layout and I don't really see a point in using them.

The eyelids are a texture via math nodes, and it is just a parabola. However, I am unable to get a more stylized curve without making things more complex

Before I reuse the rig itself in any way, I want to update the eyes so i can have a slider to toggle a hidden curve that I can use for the closed eyelids.

*UPDATE: THIS HAS BEEN ADDED

3. Possibly making the mouth more versatile.

This is something I am not sure is possible with my knowledge or just really in general? it probably could be but I may have to add in a lot more nodes and stuff.

The mouth is also done through procedural texturing. There are no actual image files used and all the shapes are solely from math nodes.

So my main problem is "curving" teeth so if I have a more curved mouth the teeth can kind of follow along, and it will look better. i may have to play around and experiment with vector stuff

4. making a pose library

As an animator myself, a pose library to add basic expressions and, more importantly, lip sync, is TOTALLLYYYYYYY NEEEDEEEEDDDD I mean I think you can apply poses mid-animation? I have soggy memory

5. Overall, making sure I can reuse the rig

Unlike the new rigs, reusing a rig and adapting it to a new character was a big pain in the antenna dish. With procedural rigging its much easier because the constraints will be aligned with what i tweak in the meta rig.

Because of that, i have to make sure that Dawn's rig is something that will not require too much tweaking when I get to reuse her rig for others. I'm working on Psyche, and by the time i can rig her, Dawn's rig should be good to go.

So again, making sure i have all of the above ready for reusing YEAAAH

November 19th, 2023 - finished writing/posted at 10:33 PM

#blender #spacecraft #logbook #log

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andyourhostkristenwiig · 2 years

Note

Your colleague really sounds like a childish asshole from what you're saying. But why do you call him your creepy colleague?

Well...

A) one time we saw each other at a bar and drank a little together with my friend. We had the same way home and he asked if he could have some water. So I told him to come up with me, I'd give him a bottle of water. But instead he sat down on my couch, asked me if he could kiss me which I immediately shut down. I told him to leave because I wanted to go to sleep to which he suggested we could sleep next to each other but I threw him out. He was beyond drunk and wanted to leave the house through another apartment door 🤦🏻‍♀️ he couldn't remember a single thing the next day and I didn't tell him because that would've made work even more uncomfortable if we were both aware.

B) He went to a bar with my friend one time and got really irritated with her when she didn't hold eye contact with him the entire time. Meanwhile he constantly smokes in your face and leaves mid-conversation. He told her that he broke up with his girlfriend of 7 years and at the end of the evening told her that he would delete my friend's number because they're not a good fit. This 46 year old creepy, always drunk, beer-belly man seriously thought he had a date with my incredibly gorgeous 30 year old friend who's a mother to two young children.

C) he constantly texts us (now me) drunk and asks us where we live because the pub/bar is boring and he'd rather drink with us or play cards. We always dismiss his messages or ignore them altogether

D) a few weeks after my friend shut him down, he tried to get to her again by sitting next to her (drunk) uninvited and wouldn't leave when being repeatedly told to leave. When she was in the bathroom, he walked up to her friend and started talking about her. She came back and sat back on her seat and he still talked about her like she wasn't there. First of all he talked about her having 2 kids with 2 men and then acted like he didn't know her name, pointed to her and said "This one...I don't know her name.". So she threw his cigarettes through the bar and told him to piss off. THEN he texted me at my family party telling me my friend is angry because he didn't remember her name. Before that he'd already texted me asking where I am, if he can come over with boxed wine, if he can come along to my family party and that we'd have to pretend to be a couple. So I told him off that night as well and told him I didnt give a shit. His reaction was that he's too old for this drama 🤦🏻‍♀️

E) he seems to confuse us as friends and constantly makes inappropriate jokes that I might laugh about if a friend made them but with him it's just creepy

F) one time I wore shorts to work (fell asleep before I could take my laundry out of the washing machine) and he came into my office going "Ohh you're wearing shorts?!", looked underneath my desk and...do you know in old comic when the character gets huge eyes and fletches their tongue?...that's what he did. It felt disgusting and I've never fallen asleep before the laundry was done again.

So yeah...that's why I'm always more and faster irritated by him. He's creepy and he makes me uncomfortable and I wish he'd shut the fuck up with his "funny jokes". Every time you tell him off he pretends like it's a huge generation thing where he doesn't understand our generation. But I've genuinely stopped going to our local bars/pubs because I don't want to run into his drunk ass. And he goes every Friday and Saturday.

But I swear to fucking god, if he pulls that again with my friend, he'd be happy if she only throws his cigarettes. I assume next time he either has a drink in his face or his phone will fly.

He doesn't understand when you tell him. Right now I'm pulling through this because I'm planning on quitting by December.

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waifu-13 · 2 years

Text

wish you were sober

kakashi angst.

an- lolz didnt mean to be depressed then dip anygays here more angst btw Kakashi is based off a real person in this situation not how I perceive Kakashi, I know yall like my writing for how I do a good job at doing things based off the character , anyways for every relog I may get a minute of their time :)

tw- mentions of alcohol. fighting,

This again, a constant loop of lovely days now mixed with the smell of alcohol on his breath. The words he manages to say in full sentences is just lies at this point, you nod simply knowing the out come of it all. not remembering an sober days of him or if anything he says is alcohol endured lies

"all yours this weekend okay?" Kakashi says mid slur

"ok" you coldly respond, please as If he meant it this time. he said it before what will change.

“nowww nigh my dear” he leans in to kiss your forehead to which you move out of the way leaving him confused

“goodnight Kakashi” you respond shutting down the conversation for the night

and as the days come and go, Sunday night arrives you were right, he forgot or simply didn't care. As he walks in you look at him and walk into a different room locking the door. After a few minutes you hear a faint knocking on the door

“babe please I'm sorry, here next weekend I swear this time ill be all yours now please open the door” his voice faint through the door

“sure you mean it, now goodnight. you could of let me know you got busy” you didn't open the door, to hurt to face him. you just wanted alittle bit of his time which he didn't seem to understand or care enough about your feelings. Going to bed upset and in a different space then him.

Once again the days pass with some slightly regular conversation happening between you two but just like last time you watch Saturday come and go then Sunday nigh hits and you get a text

“sorry babe, I know you wanted to do something today, Tuesday we’ll do something” you doubt this, you doubted all of it from the start but for once you wished you wrong, you hoped he actually meant what he said but all the doubt you have you still wait for Tuesday.

Monday finishes then Tuesday morning arrives and you wait...and wait, then send text and your left on seen.. he didn't care enough to tell you anything. As midnight hits you hear a knock on the door. you get up to open it only to see the gray haired man standing in the doorway.

‘no, go away” not even wanting to hear a pitiful excuse for him

“hey no, listen please? “

“yk what? sure tell me how you kept fucking up please fucking tell me what's more important to you then following through. or even fucking caring to tell me what's keeping you away? “ slightly raising your voice trying to breakdown, he lost the right to see you so vulnerable

“ dear you know I'm busy, I'm sorry. I know you've been lonely, c'mon one more chance?’‘ he leans against the doorframe. does this man really think he’s in the place to keep asking for favors?

“why do you think your in the place to ask me for anything? yeah I've been fucking lonely and hurt. just fucking go. ill pack your shit. it will be by door in the morning . don text me, call me, anything. now step back please” Kakashi steps back trying to process what just happened, you close the door and turn off your phone. He wasn't worth the pain he kept putting your heart through the countless nights you cried yourself to sleep. the countless “ you did this to your ex tho” comments after mentioning the problem,. All the times you put your feelings second to be there for him or the time he put your pain second to ask to borrow money. You did what you needed... from now on its you first.

Honestly you always let me down

And I know we're not just hanging out

#Kakashi #kakashi x yn #kakashi fanfiction #naruto fanfiction #angst #angst fanfic #kakashi angst

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jiilys · 3 years

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would u help me out for a second. im in the mood to write for the first time, and i think your style is beautiful. sitting down n actually trying though, im stuck as fuck! i’m realizing that in your dialogue/scenes you’ve got a lot of Little Things. little tiny elements that are subtle & just enough. how are you deciding that lily is building a house of cards at the moment or sirius is sitting in a tree or whatever during a given scene? how do you come up with those ideas for dialogue that are so silly & real & sneakily tender? do you know where it’s going when you begin? any advice for just… starting something?

ps: i appreciate you. you make it look easy & that’s very very cool

This is a lovely question!! Sorry it took me so long to get to it, I didn’t want to get it wrong. Also I’ve included some examples to try and explain what I mean in practise, but it also comes off rather like plugging. tragically this is unavoidable. Anyway, all that being said I have no idea how to advise you about dialogue and coming up with it, I think just listening to people talk helps. Don’t forget contractions, and when in doubt always trust the reader to keep up, real people don’t say perfect or even grammatically correct sentences a lot of the time. We also cut each other off all the time, especially when we’re trying to be funny. Like, here’s an example from warm front:

“He’s not even two. He probably would have thought it was, like, having a lie down or something.”

Harry was laughing now, “A lie down?”

“Yeah, a spontaneous, truck-induced–“

“–Permanent–“ “

–Permanent, lie-down. I’m almost jealous now actually.”

Another thing, but people say um and like or can't speak or cut themselves off, especially when they’re nervous. James when Lily says she loves him for the first time: ‘“Wow,” He breathed, “I’m– wow.” He put both hands on her cheeks and kissed her crazy, abruptly, dumbly. Her head spun.’ He can’t even speak! Dumb boy.

I think natural dialogue sometimes just requires you to read it aloud, which is very embarrassing but ultimately quite useful in trying to figure out whether something sounds normal or not. Use casual words, and try not to go dictionary hunting: if you cant think of the word chances are your character can’t either

In terms of concepts I have no idea, but I do have a few tips. I write all my short one-shots in one document (its called ‘just bad’ lmao) so its easy to start something, write a few lines, and then if it doesnt work just start a new concept, but still have all the old stuff handy. if you feel like you’ve written yourself into a corner its probably because you took a wrong turn earlier, so its just a matter of going back up and figuring out where you turned onto the dead end, or where a line could be funnier and/or sadder and/or more meaningful. Sometimes the bare bones of a decent line is there but you have to work it a little.

In this harry/ginny thing where harry is apologising for all the attention and ginny brushes him off she says:

“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”

The response went through a few drafts, all variations on the same thing:

(1) “You’re funnier.” [too short, doesn’t make sense, and not really that funny. unholy trinity]

(2) “You make it funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, “It’s not– you make it like that.” [this could work! I have no idea why I cut this, I think I forgot abt it lmao]

(3) “You’re the funniest person I know, Harry said, sincerely, and Ginny felt her heartbeat all through her, “You make it funny.” [jumping from ‘its more funny than annoying’ to getting this sincere out of nowhere is a little much, even for harry who is famously whipped]

I ended up going with this:

“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”

“You’re funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, flustered, “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”

It follows the flow of the conversation and I think the way he says it, ‘you’re funny’ like its obvious, and then being like oh fuck and over-explaining it stumbling a little “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”. You know when you like someone and you say something that gives you away before you can stop yourself? I wanted it to sound like that. Just gotta keep in mind how people behave, we are so stupid a lot of the time, we give ourselves away.

The thing about short stuff i find is implying a lot of history without actually describing a lot of it. I normally do this by having memories come up as almost shards, one second of feeling. You know when you’re in a conversation with someone and they mention someone or a past event, and it rises to the top of your brain, but only for a second? i find sometimes when you’re reading stuff people will try and replay entire memories or events mid-conversation, which is not something you do when you think. You don’t need to replay it beat by beat, you were there! This sounds vague as hell so I’ll try and show you what I mean:

From good crimes: “Petunia is engaged.” Lily’s voice, raw and wrong, “To Vernon. Eliza Hunt told me at the supermarket.” Sudden flashes of Petunia, the only time he’d ever met her, sat in the back of Lily’s twenty-first, pinched and whispering. “Whose Eliza Hunt?” This seems as good a thing to say as any.

pretty on the nose (the phrase ‘sudden flashes’ is pretty so i'll allow it from past me). But see how you don’t need to know how Petunia didnt talk to anyone, how she left early, how she was the odd one out: you don’t need to read all that, you already know because she was sat in the back and because pinched is such a mean verb, spiteful and sharp, you can already imagine how the evening went without me saying so

From my proposal take, after Sirius finds out they’re engaged: Sirius’ grip on his shoulder tightened for one second, still grinning, and James knew what he meant. “I know.” He said, because only Sirius had been there for all of it, when they were fifteen, drunk on Firewhiskey for the first time and James had said I think I’ve fucked it, I think I’ve fucked it but I like her for real.

you don’t need a description of the whole night, what party they were at, who they were with, what they were talking about: the important bit is that Sirius was the first person he told, and that they’re both remembering that at the same moment because they’re soulmates lmao. You know when something big happens for a friend and you feel so full of pride & love that you feel like you’ll burst into confetti?? this needed to feel like that, and you only need a flash for it

I feel like I’ve sort of strayed off from what you asked me, which is really advice on how to start something. I normally start with a line, usually of dialogue, and then try and build from there because dialogue is my thing. You might have a different thing! Some people write from concepts or locations, or an image. i might start with one or a few lines of dialogue, write them down, and then try to build from there. For example for the proposal thing I started from james just saying “Marry me”, which I find more romantic than ‘will you marry me’, purely because it sounds like he simply couldn’t stop himself from saying it, like it rushed out. Another example, this thing started from just “don’t be mad at me” “okay” James agreed instantly, because he is such a sucker for her.

When I write I don’t normally know where I’m going! I normally set out to write something I think is vaguely funny and evokes An Emotion, and then I just play around with stuff until I get there. when I write certain stuff and I have scenes in mind, stuff I want to happen, but I find that if I try to plot it to tightly its not exciting to work on, because sometimes you write a good line by accident, that you hadn’t thought of when you sat down, and you surprise yourself. That is a really nice feeling! i want to maximise that feeling.

'What I mostly try to remember is that writing something down, anything down, is useful. Sometimes you write for a whole night and dont get anything useable, but its like clearing pipes. Sometimes you have to flush through shit to get to the good bits. All the rough stuff, the things you don’t like or didn’t work, you wrote to get you to the stuff that did work. All of the bad shit got you here! It wasn’t a waste, you were working to find the good thing

If I had any tips its just the usual stuff, read! It is annoying how much that helps. Also, and I know this may make you shudder, but reading poetry is useful just because in no other literary or media form is language so important. In comics you have pictures, in novels you have plot and character, in film you all that and cinematography, but in poetry you live and die by how good the words are. If you want recs here’s my poem roundup tag, that I do sometimes, or if you want something just now read this by Anne Carson, which uses words like ‘smashing’, ‘boatwash’, and ‘green’ in the best way possible. Also it has these lines: “Recently having learned to recognize the type of tree called sycamore, / I see them in any forest— / the ones that look harrowed, / in shreds, but / go also / straight up into life,”

I mean, think of a sharper image than that?? It’s not possible. Just try remember to stay true to your characters and that in real life, the little stuff is the big stuff. Little things the people around you do normally show they care more than big speeches, and if you want to show love that’s how to make it feel lived in. You want to build a world! the little stuff is usually the world. Take some from your own or dream the ones you wish you had.

This truly was a very kind message and I’m so grateful you like my stuff, I hope any of this was even half-useful, although now reading it back it is borderline nonsensical. I’m going to bed now, good luck with the writing, and don’t forget to send it to me!!

caro xoxo

#writing bitching #said it already but loved this message it was so thoughtful. seemed pretty articulate to me i think ur writing is gunna be just fine!!!#rooting for you & anyone trying to write something rn. words suck and are difficult! they are also better than drugs & sex. regretable #kindnesses

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shiggyscumrag · 3 years

Text

Yamaguchi and Tsukishima helping out their s/o after and during a panic attack

Sorry its been really hard to write lately, like I just have no motivation. So sorry it's taken me so long to post an actual fic thing idk man-

I had a panic attack the other night after not having one in months (I dont frequently have them, they are usually triggered when I'm out in public and in a high stress situation so this was pretty rare) so I wanted to write a self indulgent fic about one of my favs characters helping the reader with a panic attack/comforting them after the fact.

Personally listening to music helps me a lot when I'm feeling really anxious and it helped me get through my attack. Focusing in on the beat and lyrics helps me control my breathing and kinda blocks me out from the outside world. Idk if that makes since but yeah. So in one of the drabbles the reader is gonna listen to music to calm themselves down👍🏻

Warnings: mention of reader having a panic attack, mention of the reader struggling to breath, anxiety mentioned and discussed, angst with comfort :)

YAMAGUCHI TADASHI

You laid on your comforter, a whiff of clean linen hitting your nostrils. You smiled lightly. You sat up slowly keeping your breath steady. Slowly wiping away the still fresh tears on your face. You didnt realize you had cried? Hm...interesting.

You walked out of your bedroom to your kitchen to get some ice cold water (the best kind of water) and to continue to calm down. After about thirty or so minutes of sitting in the kitchen sipping your water in silence you heard the front door open.

"Y/n? Love, I'm home!" Tadashi shouted taking off his shoes and rounding the corner to the kitchen. "Oh-" he stopped startled to see you sitting there mid drink. You were just so quiet he didnt realize you were there waiting. "Hello my love!" He came around the counter and gave you a smooch on your forehead. He pulled back and noticed your face and eyes were swollen puffy. It looked like you had been crying. "Love are you alright? Have you been crying?" He asked grabbing and examining your face.

You hummed closing your eyes slightly pouting. "I'm okay tashi-" a wheeze breaking from your throat cutting you off.

"Clearly not." He spoke quietly looking at you in the eyes. His emerald green eyes finding your (e/c) ones.

"I just had a little panic attack, but in fine now! I promise!" You spoke stopping part way through. Concern growing on his face, you continued trying to reassure him. "I stepped away from what trigged it and have been cooling down for about a half hour. I promise you Tadashi that I am okay." You say, a bit of sternness pushing through you voice. No longer hoarse or wobbly like before.

With no words Tadashi pulled you into his grasp giving you a firm but not to hard hug, kissing the top of your forehead.

"You could have called me." He finally spoke solemnly.

"I didn't want to bother you. Plus I had it under control!" You pushed back looking him in the eyes while continuing on "It wasnt super bad or anything, plus my phone triggered it so I threw it out of sight."

"Okay, just-" he stopped hesitantly, his grip getting a little tighter around the side of your arms but not to tight. "Call me if you need me next time, okay?" He finally spoke making eye contact once again.

"Of course, Tashi!" You exclaimed while your hands found home on his spotted cheeks. A smile growing across his face. "Now let's order some ramen, I'm starving!"

TSUKISHIMA KEI

You can't breathe. Why can't you breathe? This is a thing you should be able to do without thinking so why can't you? Your mind racing at a thousand miles a minute. breathe. Breathe. BREATHE.

There you were hyperventilating while laying down on your bed. You couldn't catch your breathe no matter how hard you tried. You knew you were having a panic attack. This isnt your first rodeo, but what triggered it? You were simply scrolling on your phone? Sure you had a stressful day and you were feeling a bit anxious. And yeah sure the notifications popping up every two seconds made you're anxiety spike even more, but still. That's no reason to trigger an attack, so why were you having one?

You wheezed out his name as loud as you could in the state you were currently in. You didnt think he heard you. You needed him to help you with stuff you cpuldnt currently move to get. Holy fuck, what were you gonna do. It felt like you were dying. Tsuki not coming made you spiral more. What if he was hurt and needed you more than you needed him? What if something happened? What if he left to go grab something and you just didnt hear him tell you? You were spiraling quickly. Starting to see black dots cloud your vision you finally heard the bedroom door open and Kei rush to your side. Not touching you, he didnt want to hurt you.

"Y/n? Y/n, what's going on? Come on baby, talk to me!" He said panicked.

"H-headphones-" you wheezed out.

He rushed over to the nightstand and grabbed them. Running back overheard asked "Okay, okay I got 'em! Now what?" He asked, a wild panicked look in his eye. A frown across his pale skin.

You pointed to your phone. He got the signal and plugged them in jabbing in your passcode hurriedly. Phone now unlocked he looked for your music app to pull up your favorite playlist and put the headphones in your ears as he hit play.

Hands finding your eyes you held your arms up, opening up your lungs. You focused on the words that were blasting in your ears as you tried to even out your breaths. Tsuki sat their right next to you, waiting for you to catch your breathe, not touching you. He didn't want to disturb or distract you.

After about 3 songs you could finally breath normally again. You reached over and pulled the ear buds out of your ears. Turning off the music you tossed your phone to the other end of the bed. You wiped your now wet face to get rid of the sweat and tears. Tsukishima only stared not knowing if you were okay for physical contact yet. You turned to him red faced with puffy swollen eyes and cheeks. You gave him a light smile. He pulled you into his embrace and started rubbing comforting circles into your back cooing praises into your ear. You simply sat in his arms focusing on his words and the warmth of his body agaisnt yours.

"Thank you, Kei." You wheezed out.

"Oh shut up, theres no reason to thank me." He turned kissing your temple, pulling you harder into him. You smiled gently and cuddled into his loving embrace.

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kaz11283 · 3 years

Text

Of Course I'm Here

Characters: Come on you know by now how this goes (Loki x you) (Team x you, platonic)

Warnings: None. And really if you ever see anything that I might need to able as a warning please let me know... I'm the person who forgets there are people out there that get offened by the word F*** if that is an exapmle of anything.

Summary: Mid battle and the avengers keep looking for an answer as to why the God of Lies hasnt showed up yet. Of course you have no idea but at least he proves them all wrong.

ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: hey guys Im back, I know it hasnt been long but I also know I havent been posting every single day like I was, i got into a weird little funk where I didnt want to do anything, I was just feeling completly drained, and I felt bad because I have my little and I didnt even want to play with her because I have just been so TIRED, but I'm feeling better. Work has been kicking my ass here lately and ive been working over 50 hours a week so ive literally been coming in, eatting / feeding the little, getting us ready for bed, and crashing as soon as she falls asleep. But im here now. I will probably be more active on weekends than during the week because I have more time to spend working on stuff but I will be posting also during the week just not daily. At least until after state comes. Thank you so much for the reblogs, likes, comments, follows, and messages please keep them coming! If you would like to be tagged please ask or message, and requests are open. Love you guys so much! 💚💚💚💚💚

Loki Masterlist

~~~~~

"Y/N, BACK UP I NEED BACK UP! EYES IN THE SKY!" Tony yelled from above, you and Clint stood back to back on a roof top shooting as many bad guys as you could. Clint took aim at another carrier, shooting at the engine causing the entire thing to blow up raining debris and hot metal around you.

"Damnit Clint! Farther away make sure they are farther away!" You yelled popping him on the head with an arrow before aiming it at the thing that was chasing Tony.

"Where is lover boy at? You.sent him the location right?" Nat asked into the com.

"Yes I sent him the location, no I dont know where hes at." You mocked.

"Did you send him the right location?" Sam asked.

"One time, one dam-"

"Language!" Steve chimed in causing everyone to groan. Gun shots where ringing all around you and you could here metal on metal paired with Hulk screams coming from another building over.

"Language." You mocked muting your com son that no one but Clint heard you. "I am a 26 year old woman, I think I'm old enough to cuss if I want." You drew back your bow and sent another arrow flying into another goon that had Nat trapped aginst a wall. She shot you a thumbs up before running off. You hit unmute on your com.

"Jesus, 26? Baby, you sure you don't need to be at a babysitter instead of on a building killing things?" He laughed.

"Dont worry Hawk, when we get done here I've already booked you a nice nursing home to be put into." You put your bow around you and stood on the edge of the building. "I need a better view." You looked round, the top of a taller building caught you eye. "There Hawk, we can cover a better radius from up there, get closer to the action."

"DOES ANYONE KNOW WHEN THE GODS ARE GOING TO BE HERE? WE NEED MORE HELP WERE GETTING TIRED AND OUT NUMBERED!" Tony came over the coms screaming.

"How do we get up there? Or do I even wanna know?" Hawk came to examin where you were talking about.

"Im jumping, you cant tell me that someone wont catch me." You shrug.

"GODS WHERE ARE TH- Y/N DONT YOU DARE JUMP!" Tony stopped and hovered right were you was standing.

"Then take us over there. We need higher ground, we cant cover everyone from down here." You crossed your arms.

"Where are the gods at y/n?" He asked again

"I. Dont. Know. Jesus you guys act like I'm suppose to be there keeper!" A simultaneous you are came from everone through the com causing you to roll your eyes. "Hes gonna be here I swear it! Now take me to the building or I jump. 1.....2....-" Tony grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and flew you to the building.

God these things were everywhere and you were starting to run out of arrows. After shooting another ship and causing it to blow you heard what was unmistakably pounding on the roof top door leading to where you currently was at.

"I have some univited guests about to join my party. Anyone available for some assistance?" You yanked out the two emerald green and silver daggars that your boyfriend had given you not long after you had started dating after throwing your bow around you.

"Buy some time kid, I'm on ground level right now but I can try to get up there as fast as possible." Bucky called over the com.

"Buy some time? Ok. I can do this. I work better from afar but a little hand to hand never hurt anyone, just easier to get stabbed this way." The first of the things busted through the door running straight at you. You jerked out of the way missing his staff by just a few inches. Quickly turning you flipped the dagger like Loki had showed you and stabbed him in his side causing him to fall to the ground before the next one tried to impale you.

"I have two daggers and they have freaking staffs! Back up! WHERE THE HELL AR-" you were interupted by static in the air and a bright light. The bitfrost had just opened up leaving to gods standing in front of you and taking out the remainder ofnthe bad guys. "HES HERE! I TOLD YOU GUYS THEY WERE COMING AND THEY'RE HERE." You pulled two extra coms from you pocket and gave them to Thor and Loki.

"Always a pleasure to battle beside you Lady y/n." Thor smiled takkng the com and putting it in his ear before taking off again.

Loki sauntered over to you and put his arm around you waist, you put the com in his ear as he rolled his eyes. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss.

"You got a new outfit." You smiled at him. God the way he looked in his battle clothe always did something to you, the horned helment was a plus.

"You like it." He smirked down at you pulling you closer.

"Your wearing your horns to." You reached up and brushed a peice if hair behind his ear.

"STOP. STOP NOW. WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND ITS GROSS." Tony yelled causing you both to roll your eyes.

"Quick run down, bad guys everywhere, no end in sight, and I'm out of arrows pretty sure Hawk is too." Loki waved his hand over your quiver making more arrows appear.

"I see you had to use your daggers. I am sorry for not being here. Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked stepping away from you to examin you.

"Small cut on the side, nothing I havent dealt with before, Ill be fine. You go make sure Hawk is fully stocked up and help the others. I got a birds eye view of you right here." I leaned in kissing him one more time before smiling at him and pushing him away. He kissed his two finger before placimg them over his heart and you did the same, "always." You both said before he disappered.

You could hear Thor laughing at the chaos going on and Steve trying to direct the god of thunder on what to do. You had learned earlier to just let him do his own thing and he would be fine. Tony was still trying to micromanage everything when you heard Loki mumble something in an old language and his com cut out. You had figured it wouldnt have stayed on to long though but at least you had tried. It had calmed down up on your end so you decided to finally go back down to where Clint was at shooting an arrow with heavy duty rope you glided back down next to him to watch what was going on.

"Hello, earth to y/n." He snapped his fingers in front of your face. You had been to busy staring at Loki and that damn helmet. "I dont even understand why were friends." He rolled his eyes propping up on the ledge watching as the rest of the team secured the last of the bad guys.

"Because we both shoot arrows, because we are both the best in the team, or because we both know we are the best looking one on the team so we have to stick together." You laughed jumping up so you could sit on the ledge.

"The birds can come out of their nest now." Bucky called over the coms causing you both to sigh.

When you and Clint had reached the bottom you walked over to Thor theowing your arms around the big goof ball.

"You are amazing during battle as always." He beemed patting you on the shoulder.

"As always? Thor youve only fought with her twice." Steve said beside you.

"I had a week off. Went to Asguard, spent time with the boys. Someone had to keep them in line." You shrugged like it was no big deal.

"She was amazing!" Thor went on telling the story of the fight you had all gotten into.

"Mothers been asking about you by the way dear. Wants to know if you've decided to come stay for a while." Loki leaned down and whispered in your ear.

"I think I'm leaning toward a yes. I can't stand being away from you, you had been gone forever this time." You reached for his hand as you both walked to the quinjet.

"I was making arrangements to have our room redone. I figured you would come with me." He gave you a knowing smirk as he reached up to take off his helmet.

"Leave the horns on. I have a suprise for you when we get home." You pulled his hand away from his head and smacked his butt.

"You are a little minx." He laughed chasing you into the jet while the rest of the team groaned and rolled their eyes.

"Even if you wasnt moving i would be kicking your ass out! I am so sick of the PDA between you two." Tony hollared after you.

"Leave them alone Tony, they are courting. Im just glad my brother is happy and not trying to stab me." Thor clapped Tony on the back.

~~~~~

Tag List:

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

@high-functioning-lokipath

#loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki #loki avengers #loki daily #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki x y/n #lokilaufeyson #loki one shot #loki (marvel)#loki imagine #loki masterlist #loki and thor

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