#and i also don’t want them to know i have a surgery because then they will ask me questions and i want my relationship with this family
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I love reading your random Boothill thoughts 🥲. Especially the one where he is a dad. Do you think he is a girl dad or boy dad?
Ahhh thank you! Ik you sent it before his story was leaked but man was this spot on 🫠 here’s some dad!boothill hc with reader because im starving
Warning: mentions of pregnant reader and all that jazz, SPOILERS FOR BOOTHILLS STORY.
I FELT IN MY BONES he was a girl dad before it was revealed to be canon! Boothill gives so much girl dad vibes it’s immaculate. He’d love to pick out pink clothes for his daughter, pink shoes, ponies and other plushies! Or rather, he loved.
That’s until you happened to get pregnant shortly before he left for his surgery. He came back a few weeks later with his new body, but no one was home. A small gift bag sat on the table, waiting for him; Boothill opened the bag and grabbed a piece of long paper, a black and white picture. A small bean present in the middle; the back of the picture held a tiny caption, that read: “I’m only a few weeks old. I can’t wait to meet you, daddy.”
Even though the wound was still fresh and open, since not long has passed since the incident on his planet - Boothill began to feel bitter determination to give his baby the best life they could ever have; this time, a life that wouldn’t see its end so fast.
Boothill is very interested in your pregnancy! He’s sometimes unable to go to every appointment (whether be it the ipc who are hunting him, or the opposite), but he knows he can’t mess it up. Not again. He’s always holding your hand when you have an ultrasound scan, glaring at the doctor and making sure they don’t hurt you or the baby, and giving your tummy so. many. kisses. He assists you in the bath, just talking to you can keeping you company, since water, cords and a pregnant human aren’t a good combo. He wants you to tell him everything.
That’s when you finally tell Boothill that you’ll have a baby girl - his mechanic heart shatters and swells with love at the same time; it’s such a strange feeling, that makes the cowboy feel a little guilty. Both of you fall silent, until Boothill makes a move and closes the distance between you, smiling sadly at you and softly caressing your stomach with his hand, “I’ll treasure her forever.”
There are days when Boothill truly feels like the hole in his heart cannot be healed after your first daughter, but he knows she’d love to have a little sister. Yet he’s here, now a cyborg and the only memory of her is just one, lonely picture. He makes sure to never let her existence fade away by telling your round tummy that he’ll love them both until the end.
On a happier note, Boothill is just. Such a good dad, but also a chaotic one sometimes, especially if your daughter inherits her dad’s personality. They’re doing everything together - if she wants to have her hair braided, he does so, and lets her braid his (even if his hair gets so tangled at first, to the point he has to cut it 😭), good god! He loves her so much and always hugs her so tightly when she runs up to him after she notices her dad is back home.
Boothill just loves hearing her little giggles and always makes her laugh! Sometimes he tickles her so much she throws her plushies at him.
Boothill wants all her milestones to be forever preserved. He has tons of pictures of her, a few photo albums - it’s never enough. He’s so proud when she says her first word, when she takes her first steps by herself, her first drawing for him (even if she drew it on the fridge with a black marker), her first birthday. He wants to give her everything she could ever have.
Boothill might've cried the night when his little baby drew him a family portrait - with you, herself, her daddy and older sister. He's injected in her every possible good memory about her, and she never fails to appreciate her older sister even if she isn't there, knowing her dad still loves her just as much.
When Boothill’s little princess cancels the weekly tea party he’s always attended, it’s HIM who feels sad about and pouty about it.
Boothill buys his daughter tons of different hats! They’re always carefully picked and he makes sure she likes them waiting for her approval, but most of the time she wants to just wear his. She doesn’t care she’s drowning in it, it’s the best because it’s Boothill’s hat.
Even though Boothill never mentioned her anything about playing guitar, one day she started to play him a tiny bit of song she learned at school - although clumsily and due to stress, Boothill listened to her and threw her in the air in happiness when she finished - he knew it was your job and couldn’t be more thankful. Once again, he made yet another guitar in his life - this time to finally listen to his little one’s music and teach her many, many other songs they’d later play and sing together.
Oh god, when Boothill’s daughter announced her “boyfriend” she met at daycare, he just stared at her with wide eyes. This is also an instance where he cried that night and you had to calm him down. Later on he insisted to be the one to take her to daycare, and gently threatened the said toddler, “look, stinker. Don’t ya dare GET NEAR ma lil’ angel, or else.” This was his last visit without your supervision. And also, your daughter just laughed at him and left… so yeah, plan failed successfully, I guess?
Mandatory naps with daddy after daycare. Well, Boothill only pretends to sleep when she looks at him - but once she falls asleep on his chest, he looks at her with so much love, gently resting on his chest and stroking her hair, that was just like his and adoring her tiny face, that he thought was the most perfect mix of you and him. Boothill shushes you with his finger quietly, when you ungraciously enter your home. A content smile appears on his lips when you give him and your daughter an apologetic kiss on their foreheads, still hearing her snoozing tenderly.
#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#boothill#boothill hsr#boothill x reader#.thirst
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This is for the anon that asked for advice about being sensitive on their clit and overcoming it. I don’t know if I can offer the best advice as this isn’t something I have personally experienced, and I also don’t know if she will have already tried many of the things I might be about to suggest.
Firstly, I think it’s important to remember that sex is SO different for everyone. Some girls can cum from penetration alone, some girls can’t. Some girls have really sensitive nipples and other areas, and others don’t. I’m sure it’s the same for men in some areas (though admittedly I can’t offer as good examples as I can for women). The reason I say this is that, anon might have different pleasure areas that would work better for her during sex and during masturbation. There’s no rules for sex stating that you absolutely must incorporate touching your clit, and if you don’t like it and prefer other things then it’s worth exploring yourself more (or getting help from someone else) and seeing what works best for you.
If you have already tried that, and you find that you struggle to get pleasure from other things, then it might be time to explore some other options. I’m afraid the only one I can think of at the moment is numbing cream. Please make sure you get stuff that is only designed for sexual use!! Some sex shop somewhere should have it, I’m sure I’ve seen talks of it’s use in other link communities. If it’s not available in those places, seek out forums or things like that for what is safe for use down there. Very important part! If nothing is safe do not use!! Whilst most numbing creams will obviously be designed to completely numb that area, I would like to hope that there are different levels (it might be that some are just cheaper and don’t work as well lol, but hey that might work out perfectly for you). If you can experience just a little numbing around that area, it might mean that you or a partner can rub that area without it being too sensitive for you, whilst still receiving some pleasure.
Alternate ways I could think of, would be seeing if rubbing over clothes might help. Some people incorporate brushes and things like that during sex, so maybe utilising similar, softer tools that allow for softer pressure might help?
The last two things I could think of to recommend is either a doctor, or weirdly enough - reddit (or some other similar site). Firstly, it’s not abnormal to go to the doctors for sex related problems. I am in no way trying to infer anything is wrong with you, or that you have any cause to be worried, so I really hope I don’t cause any upset here! But, if you are not finding sex as enjoyable as you want to be able to do, and it’s due to a reason outside your control, there’s nothing wrong with exploring all avenues as to potential causes, or ways to help. That being said, if a doctor gives you any advice and it involves some permanent surgery or something like that - do your own research and definitely explore other more temporary avenues first to see if anything works better for you.
The Reddit suggestion is purely because I haven’t experienced this myself and so the paragraphs I have just sent could very well likely be worthless pieces of information. Reddit or some other forum like that might have people with actual personal experiences of this problem and how they overcame it.
Hopefully, these ramblings are helpful for the anon and maybe at least get some ideas rolling for them !!
And here's useful advice #2 <333 thank you for taking the time to write this out.
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what if we lived in a world where medicine was actually healing according to the individual’s whole self and not simply another axis of control and violence often inextricably intertwined with systemic oppression
#medical tw#weight tw#i have to go to the doctor and i’m scared#they told me to go to the gynecologist two years ago and i still haven’t#because dysphoria + trauma + phone call anxiety + developmental inertia = ????#i’ve also lost 15 pounds since last time so hopefully the Weight Lecture will be lessened#i don’t want to be lectured about how unhealthy i am or how i need to get my pap smear already because i fucking know#i just want them to tell me i can work and i can get my top surgery#that’s it#cause they don’t do shit beyond that. i’ve been in so many kinds of physical pain since i was 11#julian bashir would never do this to me#jules speaks
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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hi so this started as a life update and then turned into a major vent and i am very sorry so i am putting it under a cut. content warning for medical stuff and surgery and also college and also generally being upset
oh hey arthur update the medical issues i’ve been vaguing about for the past like week are officially not life threatening or anything and will be getting resolved in a surgery this tuesday. so recovering from that will be a super fun way to spend the last three weeks leading into my senior year, which i really badly overbooked with babysitting nearly every day and working my pizza job extra hours, both of which jobs are the kind where just calling in sick for one day causes actual problems for real people in ways that other jobs maybe wouldn’t. so i’m taking off both my jobs on the actual day of the surgery but otherwise i’m just. powering through it all
#starting on monday i’m taking on a whole other family to babysit on top of everything else!! wasn’t planning on a surgery in the midst#on the bright side maybe the money i make from the extra work will maybe possibly kinda sorta make a dent in the fees for all the#surgery and appointment costs even my fifteen minute visit at the cvs pharmacy cost a hundred freaking dollars#so umm let’s hope that the working i’ve been doing this summer amounts to a little more than just. not being in debt#also the family i babysit for hasn’t texted me back after i told them i had to schedule the surgery during a time i was supposed to be#babysitting. and i think they will understand but i feel terrible because they’re supposed to be able to count on me#and i also don’t want them to know i have a surgery because then they will ask me questions and i want my relationship with this family#to start and end with how i do puzzles with their kids. i don’t want to talk to them about scary personal stuff#plus what if they try to send me a care package or something they think i’m a cis girl named ari they wouldn’t know they have to be discreet#and i don’t want people irl to know about the surgery before it happens because then they’ll ask to see it and i don’t want them to see it#because at work i’ve been wearing a mask and nobody knows i’ve had a potentially cancerous growth for a freaking month#and anyway it’s not cancer or anything it’s just my stupid macrophages but i don’t want people to see it or talk to me about it until it’s#gone. in other news my older sister starts college on monday at the local community college that i will probably go to despite my efforts#so. no anxiety here tonight why in the world would i be terrified about anything right now what are you talking about how could there ever#(/s)#i sincerely hope everyone here is doing okay. i am sorry for kind of venting but i have been holding this stuff in a little bit too long#two people total outside from me and my family know what’s going on and i’m not looking to have any more irls find out#but i am bursting at the seams and a little bit terrified. not to mention the stupid college everything piling up on me right now it’s just#a little bit much. anyway the medical world is ridiculous and stupid and if i have to be on hold with one more surgeons office i will cry#and i’m just kind of here. i’ll put a thing at the top so that nobody has to read this. and trigger warnings and everything#and i really hope everyone is okay i am sorry for being a little too much right now#vent tw#medical tw#ask to tag#anyway i’m going to bed really soon i just. really really needed to yell about how much everything is. even if it’s going to get fixed#me. my post. mine.#delete later
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long winded rant in the tags coming that’s partly about weight but in a very unfiltered sad way so if that triggers you do Not read on
#on holiday I was like oHHHHH this is what living in the moment is! What listening to your body is! what not worrying about how you look is#but doing what makes you happy#and then …… I came home and got sent the pictures#+ my friend being. unintentionally fatphobic as fuck#while hurtful as fuck too#and it’s all just been piling up too since I got home because I’ve been having a lot of conversations and seeing a lot of people that#confront me with who I used to be and who I am now and how I’m really not happy with that#and it feels like it’s not gonna get better#like I’m destined to be in a job I like but isn’t what I want because I’m not capable enough and I’ll never know what romantic requited love#feels like. I’ll never cure my vaginismus I’ll never be able to let someone in or they won’t want me this is just it for me#and SOMEHOW the way I look has become the ultimate culmination of all those things?#my face is suddenly a woman in her thirties face#I keep gaining weight despite not even eating all that much because FUCKING PCOS makes it impossible#my hair in my face grew back. my stomach is hairy and that plus the added beer belly just makes it look like I’m a 50 year old man#I am soooooooo tired of the dysphoria#and the way pcos ruins fucking everything because I can restrict calories all I want and move all I want but will it help ? No !#and of the fact that it impacts the way I feel about myself so much because I’m convinced now I’ll never find anyone#should have tried harder when I was 21 because that was the only time in my life I reasonably fit society’s standards like That was my shot#I’ve been taking supplements everyone says will help but I’m not sure I noticed anything in the past six months and I can’t take berberine#because it fucks with my heart medication. which. That too. I have that too#and I’m in pain! All the time now! ALL THE TIME so I can’t even work out to keep the weight stable because guess what ?#just after a normal day at the office I come home and have to lie down because everhthing hurts so much !#today I got an impromptu massage in an attempt to feel better but it didn’t fix shit and I had to buy clothes for kings day after#and I didn’t try them on just quickly grabbed some orange shit to try on at home and at what I saw in the mirror I genuinely got nauseous#I just don’t know who that is in the mirror but it’s not me and I can’t accept it. I’ve been trying so hard but I can’t#it genuinely makes me so sad and I keep telling myself that a reduction will help in feeling more like myself and it will help with the pain#but what if it doesn’t? what if my pain doesn’t go away after af all and my stomach just juts out and I feel like a gremlin all the time#what then. what the fuck do we do then. also I’m so fucking scared of that surgery anyway that I don’t fucking want to do it anymore#I want so many things and all of them feel out of reach and I know my own brain is my worst enemy and it’s not rooted in anything real but.#Isn’t it? really — isn’t it???????
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There’s so many terfs and anti-SW on this one popular post about eating disorders/makeup/plastic surgery, and then people in the comments are upsetty spaghetti that some of us disagree with the post in the first place because we know where this shit’s going looool.
#if you’re blocked and don’t know why I just went on a blocking spree because I don’t trust y’all with#this stuff. especially if I don’t know where you stand on certain issues.#also yes you should be allowed to have purely cosmetic surgery if you want it.#I don’t want to hear all the ‘if it makes you feel better sure but think critically about why it does’ bullshit one more time#you don’t want x y or z?#cool. but you don’t get to decide for the people that do x y or z#you talk about those people who want x y or z being manipulated into it? aren’t you being manipulative trying to stop them?#lol#also maybe I’m sensitive about this but that’s what happens when you’re bullied and manipulated for acting hyper feminine/effeminate#and that’s not even getting into the transphobia using the same sort of shit reasoning I’ve had to deal with#edit: one last salty addition- I saw someone on that post talking about how MEN using makeup and calling it empowering were part of the#problem or whatever and just#you do know men get killed for being perceived as too feminine right?#you know that feminine self expression IS empowering for a lot of men RIGHT??? I’m so tired ugh#grimtalks
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🪻Lavender Observations🪸
it's pisces season my dudes so here's my fave pisces aesthetic... this music video really spoke to my pisces moon soul so I wanted to pay homage to it. As always enjoy the observations!
work by astrobydalia
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟ���･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
🪻✨Capricorn risings are very full of themselves to be honest. They have an overall pleasant reputation and are loved (Libra 10th+Cancer 7th) but for some reason they're actually very individualistic and conceited deep down, like they think of themselves as being 'on other level' than others. I think this is because their shadow revolves around their ego (Leo 8th house) and we all know they love status but unfortunately fame and popularity tends to change them and/or take out their toxic traits (Scorpio 11th house). Basically they’re the type to become extremely entitled individuals just because they’re successful
🪸✨The virgo placement urge to have a harmeless and innocent personality/reputation while also engaging in the most unholy, taboo and sometimes immoral activities behind the scenes............ iykyk
🪻✨I’ve noticed Geminis are what people think Aquarians are??? Idk Aquarius placements are the most chill and unproblematic people I know and typically don’t make any fuss out of their “quirks” or opinions, they’re just living and vibing them on their own. Geminis on the other hand are the chaotic manic pixie girls/boys or the mad scientists with the most random and out of pocket interests and ideas. They always be leaving me like ‘wtf are you talking about?🤨’ They’re also opinionated af and will jump into controversy pretty easily.
🪸✨Oh! And Geminis are WAAAAAAAAYYY more detached than aquarius dude. Geminis are air AND mutable, for them it is extremely easy to move on and detach from things
🪻✨All the people I've met who's had cosmetic procedures done (botox, plastic surgery, fillers, etc) always had libra placements and/or Neptune aspecting the ASC. Overall Venus and Neptune influence is big in people who wanna look like a glossy instagram filter
🪸✨Chiron in the 6th house are HUGE control freaks due to feeling like reality overwhelms them too much, they feel like their life is never sorted out. They are also the type to overwork themselves with pointless things or hyper fixate on short-term goals cause it gives them a sense of control
🪻✨Capricorn placements are attracted to ambition and independence. It is not so much about age difference that they look for, but rather they like it when someone has their own things going on for themselves and has solid life values that they stick to. Capricorn's love language is supporting your ambitions and you doing the same for them so.... they need to see potential in you and with you
🪸✨Libra+Scorpio placements are VERY envious people and tbh I've seen this in everyone who has this mix regardless of how developed they were.... The type to befriend/get close to people they're secretly jealous of to either ruin them or get a taste of what they have. Seriously these natives are never happy with just themselves they're always focusing on how good others' things are
🪻✨People with fire in their big 3 HATE it and get defensive when other people make unsolicited assumptions about who they are or when people assume they can know the native better than the native knows themselves. It’s hard for them to brush that kind of thing off, they don’t like to feel like people are ‘appropriating’ their identity. The type to be like “you don’t know me or my story so stfu”.
🪸✨All of the Scorpio moons I've met had at least a phase in their life where they had a very unhealthy relationship (scorpio) with food (moon)..... They always seem to turn to food when going through a hard time but in a very self-destructive way
🪻✨Sagittarius is as much of an escapist as pisces. They both crave for things to be good, positive and unserious (Jupiter)
🪸✨I’ve noticed women with personal planets in Aquarius usually have very thin and sparse eyebrows and usually enhance them with makeup
🪻✨Natives with Mars in Capricorn are SUPER hairy. A very thick and stunning head of hair and/or noticeable and abundant body/facial hair. Their hair is usually deep and dark as well
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
🪸✨Scorpio Moon men I’ve noticed are attracted to a woman who is a bit cold, mean or is not easy to get to her because it makes him feel like she can handle him and his intensity. They’ll likely commit to a woman that captures his heart in such a way that he knows she can potentially hurt him more than he can hurt her. Deep down they wanna be the softer one in the relationship cause they’re a water moon after all
🪻✨I personally never had any 2nd house synastry relationship that actually involved money (except for business relationships ofc). Instead people who had planets falling in my 2nd house always make me feel like a million bucks frfr 🥺 They made it clear that they valued my opinion, my talents, qualities etc (essentially they valued all I had to offer which is 2nd house themes) and also made me feel like they favored me in many ways, like I'm a part of their top priorities, one of their 'faves' and wouldn't let me go easily. I have to say this turned pretty superficial in some cases on both sides, with 2nd house synastry there's a tendency to think of the person in terms of what they can offer be that money, time, services, advice, skills....
🪸✨That been said, you're more likely to be hired or promoted by people who have their planets in your 2nd house because they value your talent and skills. The best feedbacks I've gotten were mostly from clients who had their planets in my 2nd house
🪻✨Cancer Jupiter gives a very loving and caring husband that will totally adore you and provide for you both emotionally and financially. Husband is bound to be highly emotional and sentimental as well, the type to make it obvious to the world that he is truly in love with you. This is Jupiter's exaltation so this placement really gives Disney's Prince Charming vibes fr
🪸✨I've also noticed Scorpio Jupiter gives a similar kind of husband^ but less Prince Charming and a more 'dark fantasy novel'. This placement is giving Edward Cullen’s “your scent is like a drug to me” vibes when it comes to your husband
🪻✨With debilitated Jupiter (Virgo, Gemini, Capricorn) you might get a husband that is kinda detached and could even be distant or indifferent depending on other aspects or positions. Best case scenario is they love and support you but they are just not good at showing affection for some reason and might provide in more practical/straight forward and less sentimental ways. Again, house position,aspects,degrees, etc will give nuance
🪸✨I find Virgo and Aquarius are so similar in that they’re kinda judgmental of people and also tend to be very detached and analytical
🪻✨A crazy amount of athletes and fitness people have debilitated Mars
🪸✨I've also seen a lot of YouTubers, podcast hosts, etc have Sun-Mercury conjunction which makes a lot of sense lol
🪻✨Moon/Venus in Scorpio/8th house natives have a 'I hate everyone but you' kind of love. They really do have a level of misanthropy in their personality but it's low-key amusing
🪸✨Couples that have this best friends and partners in crime dynamics always have 3rd house synastry, I haven’t really seen 11th house as much… The 3rd house creates a fraternal understanding in a couple, two keen minds thinking alike (Gemini, twins, etc)
🪻✨I’ve actually observed 11th house synastry is pretty messy??? It creates connections (any kind) that are a bit all over the place tbh. You really don’t know if you’re gonna be together forever or fall apart tomorrow. You haven’t talked to each in years now one of you is reaching out like nothing happened and both people are keeping it chill the whole time specially the planet person. I guess this dynamic is okay between friends, colleagues or acquaintances (which is what this house rules) but when it’s a romantic or more intimate relationship…. Like I said it’s just messy, not necessarily bad, it be can refreshing and exciting but it has to be your cup of tea (I assume Air venus/mars people will dig it). You’re always wondering what’s next with this person, it feels like the sky’s the limit. I’ve seen this synastry a lot in couples who make odd decisions in the relationship that make people often question if the couple is actually serious about each other like that or not like being engaged for too long, etc
🪸✨Capricorn moons are extroverted or at least they easily pass as extroverts in social situations. They really stand out to me for having a very defined public persona that they’re mostly known for but they’re not really like that in private at all, you’d be surprised for better or for worse lmao
🪻✨"My love language is all of them" = Leo Venus
🪸✨Virgo placements are just as talkative as Gemini placements, they ramble just as much (Mercury). The difference is Virgo’s speeches are usually more thoughtout and eloquent like a presentation they’ve practiced a hundred times, in fact they tend to talk about the same stuff and repeat the same jokes, themes and rambles in most conversations because they like to stick to what they know (earth). They’re 100% the type to give you an unsolicited lecture on whatever it is they’re interested in. Gemini’s speech on the other hand is usually more spontaneous, random and chaotic, they tend to brainstorm out loud and enjoy finding new ideas in conversations (air). They’re more likely to wonder, play with ideas and ask ‘what if’ questions cause they like to explore the possible connections of different things
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
🪻✨Pluto-asc aspects/Pluto in the 1st house/Scorpio rising come across as the cool girl/boy. They always have some unattainable energy to them that people secretly look up to and this admiration often translates into jealousy
🪸✨Aries in the big 3 always have something with their forehead. Either they have a big forehead or they have a sacar there etc
🪻✨Capricorn placements work hard and party HARDER. This results in them having a rather fast-paced life style honestly
🪸✨Istg Virgo Moons got a stick up their ass. In their minds they are judge, jury and executioner and never give people grace or just the benefit of the doubt. I don't doubt they're soft deep down but damn they can be very very stubborn and they can get mean easily.
🪻✨Best Virgo placement imo is Virgo mars, I’ve noticed they tend to channel the best traits of virgo (constructive criticism, self-accountability, collaborative, understanding but know what they don’t tolerate)
🪸✨When I first joined Tumblr I read an observation that said Aphrodite (1388) conjunct Mars creates injuries or scars from beauty products and that is SO true! I have this and I've burnt myself several times with curling irons and laser hair removal gadgets
🪻✨All the people I’ve met who loved country music, country life style and that sort of cowboy aesthetic mostly had Sagittarius placements 🤠🐎 (myself included lmao)
🪸✨People with Virgo+Scorpio placements are the most intimidating people I've ever met. Imagine the nitpickyness of Virgo mixed with the intensity of Scorpio.... yeah... not the best at going easy on others or letting people in. Don't test them, they have a “get away from me you fucking scumbag” energy whenever they’re upset or simply dislike something and are the hardest to please. They are very sensitive deep down tho, very sweet and selfless if they genuinely like you.
🪻✨Sagittarius is the master, teacher, guru and guide so it makes a lot of sense for the Sagittarius Pluto generation to be hung up and obsessed (pluto) with influencers, life coaches, etc (sag)
🪸✨Moon in the 3rd house natives tend to make vey quirky movements and gestures with their mouth/jaw when they speak or they're very expressive with their mouth like they may grimace or pout a lot
🪻✨Cancer Mars men are huge mamas boyzzzz!! The type to be completely dependent on their moms/wives to even fry an egg and provide overall home security. They will marry a dominant woman who is fully or mostly in charge of the house and family stuff
🪸✨Speaking of, men with domicile or exalted mars (Aries, Scorpio, Capricorn Mars) can be huge assholes if underdeveloped. If immature they can channel toxic masculinity since mars feels very comfortable here it could go a bit overboard and give fuckboy vibes. The type to be very controlling, inconsiderate and always feel entitled to sex
🪻✨On the opposite end, men with debilitated mars (Libra, Taurus, Cancer Mars) are super chivalrous and often present themselves as very polite, thoughtful and modest. Very popular among women for sure. They can be players and have huge ego too if not mature but even then their energy is very inviting
🪸✨Fire moons process their feelings by letting things out in the moment as they come either through anger, humor or simply speaking their mind. They can often appear rude when expressing something that they feel very strongly about but they'll always value authenticity above anything else
🪻✨Earth moons process their feelings by creating a course of action. Like they internally make a plan for things they will do in oder to make themselves feel better, fix their issue or fulfill their needs on a long-term/permanent basis. They could develop a whole personal system or life style that caters to their emotional needs
🪸✨As we all know Air Moons process their feelings by rationalizing their emotions. Ironically, this can make them lack some emotional intelligence because they put so much focus on their feelings making sense that they don't allow themselves to feel their feelings and figure out what genuinely feels right for them
🪻✨Water moons process their feelings by fully owning their emotions. They find comfort in the mere validity of their own feelings which is why they often have this tendency to victimize themselves, blame others for their issues and constantly look for sympathy
🪸✨I’ve very very very often seen Sagittarius/Jupiter in 7th house, Sagittarius Groom/Juno/Briede creates age gap with spouse!!! As mentioned, Sagittarius is the master and guide of the zodiac so with the influence of this sign in your marriage you are bound to have a teacher-student dynamic where either one of you has much more life experience specially in relationships
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・． ｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟﾟ･｡
work by astrobydalia
#astrology#astro#astro observations#astro notes#zodiac#birth chart#astrobydalia#astrology observations
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Hey I’m Pochi, a Pan/Non-Binary Disabled artist with BPD. I am re posting this because some life things changed for the worse again. So i’m still in the same boat as I was in May 2022, unemployed. I’ve had a lot happen. My ACL was torn on a plane which will require surgery, which my doctor has now forbid me to work on till I have said surgery. Plus the ceiling in one of the bedrooms caved in. I’ve asked for it on twitter but i’ve been afraid to on here.
This is a Approx. of what I’ll need just to survive
Electric (Weekly): $300.00 (The electric got raised and it’s been about $60 a day i’m drowning here)
Food (Bi Weekly): $150.00 (I can make stuff last but we need some food.)
Vet For Rug and Check up for Marmalady: $180.00 (This can be postponed But i’d like for it to be soon.)
Spay For Both Girls: $150.00 (Also postponed but again, sooner rather then later would be best for them.)
Cat Food : $50.00 (They have food mostly for now. But that doesn’t take long to run through.)
Med’s and Dr’s: One Med which is a 3 months supply is $75 alone and others range 0-$50. Doctors visits also vary but specialists have not been more then $25 so far.
Ticket to see Gir: $250.80 (This is a major want not a need.)
= So a lot, Close to $1000.00 give or take
The ceiling and plumbing repair is $15,000 I in no way am asking for that. I just need help with monthly bills while my Dr forbids me to work till after I have surgery.
https://href.li/?https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/Pochimonster https://href.li/?https://ko-fi.com/pochiyaki I don’t know why the links wont embed/work if anyone has a suggestion please let me know.
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I am back with more sketches for @calysto1395 's AU!
Fic snippet of her writing behind the cut:
EDIT: Fic is also now available HERE
“Fine, fine! I’m going. Stop shoving me.” Law throws his hands up and steps onto the train.
“I don’t want to see you for at least 24 hours.” Bepo retorts, his paws on his hips and blocking the doorway like a bouncer. If Law wasn’t so fucking exhausted from a ten hour surgery session he would have a clever comeback right about now. As it stands, he can only repeat Bepo’s words at him in a mocking tone. He flips Bepo off as the train doors close between them for good measure before he turns to find a seat as they slowly roll out of the station.
There is as usual only one other person on the train. Hiriluk Hospital Station is usually the one where everyone gets off as the line continues out of town into the shitty outer district where Law has his dirt cheap apartment. It’s a good thing too because Law usually has no patience for anyone after work and before work he needs to save what little he has for his patients.
His usual companion is a young man, maybe around Law’s age, who has tan skin and green hair who nods at him when Law falls into one of the empty seats. He’s always there before Law gets on and doesn’t get off anywhere before Law does. Law sees him as often as he does his coworkers so he would say they are almost friends. Save for the part where Law has no idea who he is besides a passenger and incredibly attractive.
“Trouble in paradise?” The guy asks, snorting with a smirk. He’s huddled into one of the seats that run sideways along the walls of the train, jean jacket and a hoodie today, legs propped up on his huge backpack with the long case sticking out of it.
Law just rolls his eyes and lets his head fall against the headrest. It’s part of the routine at this point. Guy will make a comment or greet him and then it will be silent for the rest of the ride, just the way Law likes it. The stranger on the train might be Law’s favorite person, right after Bepo. Then again Bepo humiliated and bullied him onto the train today so maybe the stranger has taken top spot.
“You got blood on your cheek.” The guy says and Law feels the annoyance at the routine being disturbed before he processes the words. His eyes blink open and he rubs at his cheek with his sleeve, feels the crusted flakes rub off and sees them clinging to the fabric of his hoodie.
Law stares at it for a long time, feels his eyes losing focus for a minute before he blinks and shakes his head. Maybe Bepo had a point in sending him home. He sighs deeply, feeling the exhaustion deep in his bones. “Yep.” He says and rubs his cheek once more just to make sure he got it all.
Stranger just gives him a nod when he shoots a questioning glance at him before he buries his hands in his jacket pockets and closes his eyes, settling deep into his seat. Law takes it as his cue to do the same. Just to rest his eyes for a little bit. He has about twenty minutes until he’s at his station and the conductor usually doesn’t check tickets this late at night. Law tells himself it's just for a few minutes. Just until his retinas stop burning.
Then before he knows it there is a hand on his shoulder. He jerks, flailing wildly and smacking something before he gets his bearings.
The stranger is standing next to his seat, looking down at him, hand falling to his side from where it had hung outstretched between them. “That’s your stop right?” He asks.
Law blinks, confused. Head swirling to look outside the window to see the Tang Station sign out front. “Shit.” He manages to say, scrambling with his bag to hustle outside just in time before the doors close on him. He’s catching his breath on the platform, heart racing in his chest when he looks back at the train and sees the guy standing there still. He leans down a little to wave through the window as it sets back into motion and Law’s sleep deprived brain doesn’t manage to respond in any way before they are out of view.
#one piece#roronoa zoro#trafalgar law#zolaw#op train AU#I love this AU a lot if you couldn't already tell#my art
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I think buccal fat removal in a young person is a great way to create a returning customer. It’s like adding planned obsolescence into a face. Without the support of this fat, your face and jowls will sag and your face will (according to your plastic surgeon and your insta friends and your shitty woman hating boyfriend) NEED more surgeries.
Making an adjustment to someone’s face (for money) that will all but guarantee this person’s cascading self-esteem and “need” for more plastic surgeries (for money) is just doctors being hip to capitalism.
Elective plastic surgery will always be a tool of capitalism, because the most resellable commodity is always your dream self. They create more false standards of femininity, they charge you to meet them, then they change them, then they charge you to meet them again.
But don’t worry! Capitalism also teaches Market Segmentation. You know, how they figured out that aggressively gendering toys and selling separate fantasies to male and female children resulted in greater revenue?
Huh, I wonder how you create market segmentation when it comes to profiting off of bodies? Oh of course, you create new identities with new surgeries and new clothes and new makeup looks and new hair products and pins, and suddenly you have a whole new market.
You know ow what private medical practice is like, right? You have to drum up patients somehow! You can see them on TikTok, telling us which celebrities would look “better” with which products, telling us which random person in a video would look “better” with thousands of dollars worth of medical treatment.
And people die!! Under the knife or from infections, these are REAL surgeries. Can you imagine wiping out the rest of your life because some man said you had chubby cheeks? Because somebody told you your breasts were wrong? Because your thighs committed the sin of touching? You really want to meet your ancestors because the vibes were off on your boobs???
None of us are immune to propaganda. But we can try our hardest not to constantly consume it!! Find women you know and look for their histories in their faces. Romanticize everything that makes you unique. REJECT THE NOTION THAT FACES AND BODIES CAN GO OUT OF FASHION. That is just some male garbage made up to steal our fucking money, time, and energy.
Plastic surgery is about fear of life and of ourselves.
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#doing more research on t and top surgery#dysphoria has been easier to pinpoint recently when I’m around people who see me as me#and I’m realizing that yeah I probably do want to go on t but for a short time period and then stop#like I want some of the effects but not all the way and the ones I really care about aren’t reversible so stopping once I get to where#I want to be makes the most sense#I think I want top surgery but that’s more up in the air still#partly because it’s more money but also partly because#I don’t know how much the changes I know I want from t will lessen my dysphoria#and if I’ll still want top surgery afterwards#I’m guessing that I will but I’m going to make that decision when I get there#going to look into how available t is once I go to college because in theory (if I only want to go on it for a few months like 6 max)#then I could just get my t without my parents knowing but also like. they probably should know#they think that we’re at a point in our relationship where I would tell them that stuff#we’re not at all in any way shape or form but if I don’t pretend we are they’ll get upset#maybe I just tell them once I’m at college and I can just do it through a text or whatever#saves me a whole long conversation of them freaking out#if I want top surgery I would definitely have to tell them and I’d need their help with recovery most likely unless I decide to do it much#later in life so that would have to be a more in depth conversation which is another reason why I’m thinking t first then reassess
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k so i made this poll awhile ago to answer my question on if people would rather spend a date with a swiftie or an anti-swiftie (someone who hates her and devotes their life to hating on her). i mentioned i didn’t have the spoons to handle it being longer than a day and know it was going to be biased as it would start in my circle and would work it’s way out, so i wanted to do a longer poll when i had the energy to handle a week long poll like that. (i’m assuming when i post this, as i’m pre making it, i’ll be in recovery from my nose surgery since i’ll be stuck at home a week so i’ll have more time to monitor and look at the tags)
so nows the time, but i’m going to addendum the question a bit:
*some extra things that came up on the original poll i didn’t elaborate on fully that i want to make clear:
- you don’t get a say in what type of swiftie you get. assume that you’re going to be spending the evening with someone who massively loves her and her music and wants to discuss it. they’ll talk about songs, their favorite lines and meanings, symbolism behind the reputation album, etc.
- YOU MUST TALK ABOUT TAYLOR SWIFT. even if it’s the anti-swiftie you must talk about her. i understand the sentiment people made on her not coming up, and that’s valid, but that’s not the question i’m asking. YOU HAVE TO SPEND THE EVENING WITH SOMEONE WHOS GOING TO TALK ABOUT TAYLOR SWIFT NONSTOP, WILL IT BE THE LOVER OR HATER?
- im just trying to gather a general consensus on this and want to get data from a lot of people which means this is going to end up on people’s blogs who probably hate swifties and are annoyed by them. that’s okay as that’s the point of my question. but if you’re going to go off in the tags about how much you hate her or hate swifties and be an asshole about it im blocking you. you can just simple say “i hate her/i hate swifties” and don’t need to elaborate. you don’t need to sit in the tags going off on how much you hate her and trying to “defend” yourself from swifties. i just want an answer to the question.
- ALSO, this is not an open poll to go harass anyone in general. if you are a swiftie and see an hater in the tags and wanna fight DON’T FUCKING DO IT. just block and go read/watch your favorite media and think of blorbos kissing or whatever, but DO NOT SEND HATE OR HARASS ANYONE.
the hypothesis im trying to prove is that people in general would much rather spend an evening with someone that is going to talk about something they love all night vs someone who will spend the evening talking about something they hate. i want to gather as much data as possible to get a good consensus and if you go and be an asshole to someone because of their tags on this poll, either side of the swiftie to anti-swiftie spectrum, your disproving the point. if you see tags you don’t like just simply block and carry on. understand? k good.
- in general this is not meant to be a very serious or heavy question. it’s meant to just let me pick people’s brains and see what they’d want to do. i just want to get my results and go. just vote, drop your opinion in the tags, and go.
- also, this last part is silly and not at all related to my data, but since i’m forcing you on a dinner date i’ll at least let you pick the restaurant and food you have. so if you could also say what restaurant/food choice you’d want and what you’d want to order i’d love to hear it. sky’s the limit here. go nutz or even very specific on what you’d want to eat. i am trying to learn to cook and don’t know a lot of recipes or different food types, so i’m hoping this will give me a bigger idea of what food is out there to make. (this question is not meant to be a way to stick it to anyone or for you to go “i’ll go to a shitty ass restaurant and take a swiftie/anti-swiftie and make them eat garbage 🤪”, it’s just a fun question to give people something positive to add to the poll if they want. AGAIN IF YOUR GOING TO BE AN ASSHOLE ILL BLOCK YOU.)
- i’m going to be annoying and ask that you reblog for a wider sample size and such, if you don’t want to that’s fine, but i’m going to be polite and ask you nicely.
that should be everything, thank you for reading my long ass list and voting in this poll. i hope you have a good day and such.
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You Should Have Told Me (Alexia Putellas x reader)
Being away from Alexia was never easy. In fact it got harder as time went on. Luckily for you it didn’t happen often, only really when you went back to Australia whether it be for national team camp or to be with family. This time was the latter.
Like always, you and Alexia spoke to each other and found a way for it to work with the time difference. You were getting into bed and tried calling Alexia but she didn’t answer. You thought she might be busy so you text her and wait for a respond only one doesn’t come.
When you wake up the next morning you find the reason for her radio silence. A tweet which makes you feel sick.
Alexia Putellas will undergo arthroscopy surgery on 27th December.
You are filled with worry but you are also mad at your girlfriend. Why on earth were you finding this out in the internet and not by the woman herself.
Despite your mixed emotions you find yourself on a flight back to Barcelona after a length apology to your family. Funnily enough they knew it was coming as soon as they saw the news. They had only met Alexia once but the love you had for her was evident. They saw it on your face every time her name popped up on your phone.
It was the 27th by the time you arrived home or to your other home. Everyone was well aware of your relationship with Alexia so the nurses didn’t question it when you arrived at the hospital asking for her whereabouts.
“Y/N” Alba greets you with a warm hug “Alexia didn’t tell us you were coming”
“Clearly Alexia is going through a not telling people stuff phase”
Alba swallowed deeply. Your annoyance was clear and if that wasn’t a telling sign, you calling her sister by her full name was.
“Y/N I didn’t—“ Eli joins the two of you in the hall but stops talking mid sentence when she sees her youngest daughter shaking her head.
“I wouldn’t mama”
“She is in there” Eli point the door behind her “she didn’t want—“
Again she was cut off, this time by you.
“Don’t fight her battles Eli. She knew what she was doing. Feliz Navidad by way” you kiss both women on the cheek.
The two of them watch you enter Alexia’s room.
“You two need a lesson in manners. You know it’s rude to interrupt people” Eli says to Alba given that you are in the hospital room.
You get a sick sense of deja vu when you enter the room Alexia’s in. The same happened last summer and you stayed by her side for the entire thing. It’s why now didn’t make sense. You looked up the surgery, it was minor. Why didn’t she want you here now but happily had you with her then.
Alexia pays no attention to you when you enter and although she is there physically you can tell her mind is far away.
“I know I’m not your emergency contact but I would of thought being your girlfriend earned me a call or at least a text”
This got her attention. It was a good job she was already at the hospital because the speed in which she turned her head could have given her whiplash.
“Mi amorcito”
“Alexia”
Her faces changed at this. You could almost see her wince at the formalness.
“I deserve that” she knows she did wrong by not telling you. Still, she pats the space next to her hoping that you’ll join her on the bed.
She watches each step you take, you get closer to her but stop at the foot of her bed.
“What? I don’t get a hug? I am in the hospital” she tries to get you to crack a smile but fails miserably.
“Repeat those last 4 words”
“I am in the hospital” she is slightly confused because you clearly heard her.
“We have been through a lot together Alexia. Yesterday you told me everything was fine, the medics had given you a green light and that you were packing for the trip. You lied”
“Y/N I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just wanted —“
“Miss Putellas it’s time” one of her doctors come in.
“Give me a minute” Alexia doesn’t ask, she demands “I’m in the middle of something”
“No. Take her. We’re done here”
At first Alexia panics. What did you mean by we’re done here. It sounded almost like a break up but before you leave you walk over and kiss her temple. It was a small sign that you were not breaking up with her.
Her eyes remain on you as you walk out the door. Her mother steps in her eye line and Alexia recognises the look on her face; she is in trouble.
“You didn’t tell her, idiota!” Alba appears from behind their mother.
“Alba not now”
“No Mija, she’s right. When you wake up you need to fix this. That girl is the best thing to happen to you and you know that you should have told her. Alexia, she is your girlfriend she had a right to now”
“Por Dios! I know I messed up. I thought I was doing the right thing”
Alexia truly did think that. You had been with her to every physio appointment since the champions league game. You hadn’t been back in Australia long when the decision was made for her to get surgery. You had played the most minutes this season so far and for the sake of your own health you needed to rest, to recover.
She wanted you with her and truth is she needed you with her but she sacrificed that solace for you.
The surgery took two hours which is within the predicted time or least that’s what Google told Alexia when she looked it up. She woke up and saw two woman, neither of them the one she wanted to see.
“She left, didn’t she?” Alexia looked defeated as she came to.
“She did” Alba replied with a wicked grin on her face.
“But then she came back” Eli told the whole truth.
Alexia watched as her mum and sister stepped aside revealing you curled up on the chair fast asleep.
“I think the jet lag must have caught up with her. I saw the girl drink three double espressos but even they couldn’t help fight the urge to sleep” Eli explained.
Your girlfriend knew the battle all too well. She saw the way the time difference affected you when you travelled for international camp. Sleep always won in the end.
“Do you think she’ll forgive me?” Alexia asks her mother specifically only to earn a response from her sister.
“Of course she will. Y/N loves you and I’m talking the type of love dad had for mama. I think you’re stupid for not telling her but knowing you, you probably thought you were doing the right thing”
“No, she was being stupid” your raspy voice gained the attention of all three Putellas women.
“I was and I’m sorry”
You and Alexia were given some privacy.
“I am sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to hurt you”
“What did you think would happen? I found out my girlfriend would be having surgery on twitter. Strangers found out the same time as me”
“I wanted you here with me but you needed to be with your family“
“I needed to be with you. I love you and nobody comes above you Ale.”
“But you were supposed to be in Australia. You had plans to spend new year in Sydney. It had been planned all year”
“You’re wrong Alexia. We were supposed to be in Australia. We had plans to spend new year in Sydney. We planned it together. I don’t care where I am as long as I am with you”
“I should have told you”
“Yes, you should have. Are you able to squeeze up? I’ve had enough of being mad at you”
Alexia knows that she’s strong enough to move and does so happily. She would do anything if it meant having you beside her. It came as no surprise that you were the little spoon in the relationship so Alexia naturally holds you close.
“I’m scared Y/N. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I had the surgery and I put in the work. I was back and now look at me. I’m back at the beginning again”
“No you’re not. This isn’t like it was before. Your knee is stronger now. I called the physio on my way to the airport and he told me everything. The surgery was only an investigation”
“Would you still loved me if I’m not as good as before? If I never win another balón d’Or?”
“Alexia Putellas Segura, what silly questions those are. I loved you long before you won your first and I will love you long after you hang up your boots. I fell for the person, not the player and you’ll do good to remember that”
Alexia took a moment to take in what you had said. Her greatest fear was that you’d leave her but deep down she knew that wouldn’t happen. Your words only reiterated this.
“Did you return the outfit? Nurse Y/N might be needed again”
You jokingly gasped at her suggestion. When you look up you see that her eyes have darkened slightly. She did love you in that criminally short costume.
“I think I have it somewhere” you cup her cheek and Alexia leans into your touch.
#alexia putellas x reader#alexia putellas imagine#alexia putellas one shot#woso x reader#woso one shot#woso imagine#barcelona femeni x reader#barcelona femeni imagine#barcelona femeni one shot#espwnt x reader#espwnt one shot#espwnt imagine
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[Fluff + Slight Angst] [Zayne x Reader] A Cure.
CONTENT
Zayne has trouble sleeping after overtime and you’re the only thing that helps ):
Gender neutral reader, established relationship, kisses, hugs, slight angst, mention of previous patient deaths, mentions of guilt, mentions of nightmares + insomnia, mostly fluff, taking care of sleep deprived boyfriend, CHARACTERS ARE 18+
AUTHOR NOTES
I finished reading his anecdotes and I’m in shambles. Hubby is traumatized. One of his affinity level up quotes is “you are the only treatment for my nightmares” and I didn’t even know he had nightmares until I read the anecdotes and now I’m just in pain. I will probably also write about the parallel version of him, his dawnbreaker self, because he deserves some love too, his world sounds much more desolate than ours ):
Word Count: 1106
Zayne has always had trouble sleeping or even wanting to entertain the idea of going to sleep. His nightmares have plagued him for so many years now and it’s become his norm. His only relief from it has been you.
Some of the staff that work closely with Zayne have been acquainted with you and they’ve come to understand that if they want the cardiac surgeon to sleep, you’re the key. You love his co-workers because they really do care about each other and you’re so grateful they make sure Zayne rests well. You always make sure to bring them some snacks or coffee when you come to the hospital.
A recent wanderer attack at the outskirts of the city has left the emergency unit overflowing for the past 2 days. You’ve been helping where you can to defeat wanderers and the combat side of things has calmed down. But the hospital is still working overtime. AKA Zayne is working overtime.
He’s been up for 2 days straight due to back to back emergency surgeries that he insists he helps on. The staff will allow him to push himself but they know when to cut him off. They asked if you’d be available today to pop by and you mentioned that you’re already on your way after finishing your last area sweep and clearing the place for wanderers.
When you walk in, you set some coffees onto the clerk’s desk and quickly walk over to Zayne’s office. You slowly knock quietly and open the door cautiously so as not to spook the sleep deprived man. Zayne never shows when he’s nervous, he doesn’t get jittery because he’s literally a surgeon and can’t afford to. But, you can tell when he’s exhausted and anxious, and he is exactly that right now. You walk over to him and he hugs you from where he’s sitting at his desk, swiveling his chair to face you as you stand between his legs. You stroke your hands through his hair and rub his back, letting him enjoy the peace. “All successful?” You ask. He nods with his face buried in your chest. You’re glad that this means his surgeries and patients were all okay, but you know it doesn’t ease the pain and stress of going into a surgery worried that it might not end well. Also, not to mention the immense stress simply performing a surgery brings. The notches on his notebook always come to mind at times like this. It took a while for you to talk to him about it but when he told you they were a tally of how many patients have passed in his care, your heart ached. Since then, he hasn’t kept track and you’re very glad that he confided in you and made the decision to stop. He doesn’t deserve to have that guilt hang over his head when it’s never been his fault.
You continue to soothe him and ask “couldn’t sleep again?” He responds slowly and clearly exhausted “I haven’t felt tired…” he pauses “but you being here is already making me drift into sleep” he says muffled into your chest. “Thank you, I’m happy to see you, I just… I have another surgery soon.” “The staff has already shifted the time slots, you know they don’t let you push that far. It’s been 2 days, love,” you explain to him. Surgeons have already been called in due to the emergency and Zayne has a 12 hour period until his next shift. The staff know he’d get upset if they forced him to not work for more than a day, especially during an emergency. He’s quiet for a minute or two. “I know you trust your team. Take this time to breathe baby,” you say to him gently. When he’s in this state, he can’t form thoughts coherent enough to help calm himself down with logic. So you do it for him, softly, with lots of kisses. You kneel down to meet his eyes and cradle his face in your warm hands. He nuzzles very slightly into your touch and you kiss him on his forehead. He honestly almost falls asleep right then and there. You move him to the couch in his office, he has a wider couch to accommodate naps. He prefers his office to the call rooms (in hospital rooms for staff to sleep in), it just feels cozier and you’re also usually here.
You let him get comfy as you bring over pillows and a blanket for him, all prepared nearby because he quite commonly has to do this. With his eyes closed he mutters a slurred “love you s’much.” He has more words for you but can barely even conceptualize them in his head, let alone speak them out loud. But he knows that you understand the sentiment. He’ll make it up to you when he wakes up.
Somehow you’ve been able to stop his nightmares since you two got close again. He isn’t scared to sleep as long as you’re around. You’re his only safe haven from the dreams and just thinking about that makes him so emotional. He just thinks it makes so much sense that you cure him in this way and he loves you so much, you take such good care of him and he does the same back.
He quickly drifts off into sleep as you sit in front of the couch on the carpet while holding his hand and patting his back slowly. You purposely pat slowly to encourage his heart rate to slow and calm down. You will sometimes leave to do your own thing after he falls asleep but most of the time you stay close, wanting to keep protecting him in his sleep in a way. It probably doesn’t really make a difference but you don’t mind doing your work or playing on your phone nearby. It’s kinda like you think he subconsciously feels you there and so you stay. You don’t pay it much mind but he hasn’t told you that he feels so much better when he wakes up and sees you there. It makes a wave of warmth flow over his cold self and he can’t explain how much he loves it and you.
You watch him a little longer as his breathing slows and you know he’s fast asleep. You go to sit on his chair and check some messages on your phone but you make sure to give him another kiss on his temple before going. You don’t really see it but his lips curve ever so slightly, completely subconsciously enjoying it.
Thank you for reading!
|| MASTERLIST <3 ||
#zayne x reader#reader x zayne#li shen x reader#reader x love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace zayne#zayne love and deepspace#zayne#li shen#zayne fluff#love and deepspace fluff#love and deepspace#self insert#j's silly ramblings
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tears streaming down your face
barça femeni x reader, lena oberdorf x reader
request: here
A/N: please tumblr gods, stop giving me sicknesses i write about in sickfics. i am TIRED.
also the the requester i changed it a lil bit - hope it makes you happy (do not ask how this would work, this is fiction. this does not make sense in any reality tbh)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As soon as you go down, you know what it is. The worst injury any footballer could imagine. Then, out of nowhere Lena Oberdorf (the defender marking you) can’t seem slow down and when she tries she trips over your good leg. Groaning as her knee hits the ground with a pop. Similar to yours.
Your faces are near each other, both silently empathising with each other when a rush of blaugrana swarms the area. Alexia sensing what your injury could be already.
“Is it?” She doesn’t want to say it, nobody ever wants to hear those letters.
“I think so, Ale I don’t want this please.” You sob, climbing into her lap.
“I know, I know. Deep breathes, you’ll get through this.” You do as told then you hear commotion to the right of you where Lena lays. You listen to the accented angry voices of Claudia and Patri.
“Ay, stop being dramatic. You literally tripped over her now you’re pretending to be hurt? Estúpida.”
“You are telling me you could not stop? Lies.”
As you’re about to tell them to stop, Wolfsburg players have shoved the spaniards away from their hurt teammate. Alex does the same with Lena as Alexia does to you.
Players around and above you are shoving each other and in your opinion it’s all too much. You’re overstimulated, in pain and all you want to do is cry. It seems Alexia notices this.
“Aye, Barça why don’t you be responsible and leave so that both medical teams can come over and do what’s needed for the players.” Her voice is her stern and the German captain agrees telling off her players as well.
When the crowd has gone, medical teams swarm and do the necessary on field tests, both ultimately asking for stretchers. Not a good sign.
You send a small sad smile to Obi, an understanding between you two. No bad blood or anything.
You part ways into seperate areas and get given the rundown. They suspect it’s the ACL, but scans will be needed to determine how bad it is and what type of surgery needs to be done.
You’re deflated, 9-10 months of recovery sounds horrific. They give you crutches, and put ice on your knee allowing you to watch the rest of the match in the stands. When you make it out, the young German is there as well, looking equally as tired.
“So, the three letters?” You ask, focusing on the match.
“Yeah, you?” You nod, sighing.
“It’s all apart of the game, it sucks that we have to miss so much though.”
“Yeah, it really does. Also before I forget, sorry. I didn’t mean to trip over you.”
“Hey, I know you didn’t. Maybe after our surgeries we could meet up sometime.” She stares at you.
“Would you come to Germany?”
“I’ve always loved Germany, it’s so nice there. So yes, I would.” Her eyes light up.
“So this hangout… is it like- a date orrr.” You laugh at her nervousness.
“Do you want it to be?”
“Yes.”
“Then it is, probably shouldn’t tell the teammates about this though. Not just yet, after nearly giving you another injury themselves.” You smile sadly at her, feeling guilty for your friends actions.
“Yeah, if I wasn’t in so much pain I probably would’ve yelled back. But you know I was also held down by a certain scary yet very nice woman.” You agree with that statement. Alexia is the same.
You both talk for the rest of the game and exchange numbers at the end with a promise to see each other soon.
- - - - -
You get confirmation of the rupture later that day, and told that in about a week you would go through surgery.
Alexia has essentially forced you to stay with her because she knows what it’s like and she knows the rabbit holes you could go in. She tries her hardest and you respect that.
She makes you come to training, not for you to watch them but for them to watch you. Jana stays with you in the gym working on her own recovery.
She makes jokes and makes the long week a bit easier, you’re also on your phone a lot. The others think it’s your way of distracting yourself… but it’s not particularly you that’s distracting yourself.
More like a certain Wolfsburg player.
Lena had been good, it was also confirmed for her and she had her surgery as soon as she was back in Germany.
Things were going well, and in 2 weeks there should be another game between your teams and in Germany. Which should be fun.
- - - - -
It’s the day after your ACL surgery, it went well and now you’re hobbling around sad, annoyed and in pain. Some of the team was at Alexia’s house trying to cheer you up but you didn’t even know what you wanted.
Out of nowhere Frido and Ingrid pull you up from the couch saying nothing other than.
“We’re taking her, bye!”
You follow them slowly into Frido’s car and sit in the backseat.
“What is it?” You ask the Scandi’s.
“Hmm don’t think we haven’t seen you messaging on your phone a lot. Do not forget we have also played at Wolfsburg.” Oh, they knew. Of course they did.
“So, tell us everything. Are you coming to Germany with us?” Ingrid asks after Fridolina.
“It was my plan, yes. Also, the thing with Lena is new. I just don’t want to mess up. I think my feelings are growing stronger so I want to do what’s right.”
“Ahh, young love.” The Norwegian says dramatically putting a hand to her chest.
“Ingrid didn’t you nearly go to jail for threatening a man trying to hit on your girlfriend.” Frido snickers at your comment.
“Frido, you are in love with a MAN. Please.” The silence is loud as you laugh at yourself.
“Kid I will murder you.” The blonde says.
“Nooo you’d have an angry German to deal with and their language is already angry enough. Then Ale would cook you.”
She hums in agreement, before conversation turns normal and light, filled with laughter.
- - - - -
You’re in the stadium waiting for the game to start, sitting next to Lena. Talk is small, about recovery and everything in between. It’s comforting to know that someone near you is also going through the same thing.
As the game progresses, so does your chatter. You make plans for afterwards, going to a small restaurant she liked.
By the end of the game, your hands are sealed together and as the final whistle blows, you kiss her cheek and walk to the field.
Maybe this journey for recovery won’t be so lonely.
—————————————————————————
i lost my first cricket match… this one girl can’t catch a ball and does nothing 💀 how is she on the team
also this won’t be a 2 parter because i have no motivation ❤️
#woso#woso community#woso x reader#woso fanfics#barcelona femeni#barca femeni#barcelona femeni x reader#barca femeni x reader#lena oberdorf#lena oberdorf x reader
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