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livingindabisribcage · 3 months

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Dabi Relationship HC

Starting this blog off strong with the loml

for a while he'd be an AWFUL bf lmao

like he's not really sure how u ended up 'together', he just isn't gonna fight it

however, he is possessive of you. he does know that much. he doesn't know if he'd call it love, or lust, but he wants you to himself

the start of ur relationship (meeting him wise) would be a lot of little convos, smoking (or u sitting there while he smokes if u don't), and not much else

but u 2 start hanging out more and more, he realizes u don't care he's a villain so he tells you more about his life occasionally, and he doesn't really have anyone outside of the league so u become his escape kinda

some point down the line you guys end up fucking, definitely unplanned but there was also slight sexual tension every once and a while, so not unexpected

so for a while you're just fuck buddies, and neither of u really do much else except slowly starting to know more about each other

you start realizing that you do infact like him for more than just a friend, and u realize that at some point he started treating you a little more softly

he had no intention of doing it really, it just happened due to him not usually getting this close with someone and he can actually open up to you a little, so he naturally starts treating u a little (just a little) better

especially since ur the only person he's continuously fucked, he's not a virgin, but he's definitely not been with many people, but the ones he has been with he usually fucks then dips to never be seen again

he didn't really even enjoy sex that much before u, he kinda just wanted to feel grown up once he hit his late teens so he started seeking it out. plus he thought maybe it'd help him feel better for a bit, but no

anyways, at some point, ur relationship went from hanging out and fucking every once In a while, to being by each other during any free time either of u had

there'd be more innocent touching too, just hand holding while walking through the city, or loosely cuddling while scrolling on ur phones. it got to a point where someone called him your boyfriend, and you didn't object to it, and neither did he, so you both kinda just assumed that u guys were in an actual relationship

but again, he'd suck at it. realizing you 2 are basically dating, you'd prolly want to start doing a bit more relationshipy stuff, and he'd object 99% of the time.

dates? scrolling through tiktok and eating take out

affection? a slap on the ass, or a whack to the back of your head. the soft stuff he only does without realizing and you usually initiate it (hand holding, cuddling)

he will also continue to do whatever he wants. he isn't interested in other people, so he wouldn't cheat, but that isn't really a moral boundary as much as it is he can't be bothered

anything you ask of him will be met with "why are you being so annoying" "leave me alone" "what gives you the right to change who I am" things like that

you'd probably 'break up' a few times, saying you never wanna see him again or him telling you to fuck off then leaving only to be back to normal within the week

he'd probably use you in various ways too. if you have money, it's his now too. he *needs* cigs, or he *needs* weed, or any other thing he's interested in at the moment.

he didn't start to change until these 2 things happened though.

1 - you fr left. you put up with him for months, and you were fine with how he acted when it didn't feel serious, but now it feels too serious to be treated this way, and he refuses to change. so you're actually done this time.

you disappear, you block his number and any social media he has. you stay away from ur apartment as much as possible so he can't catch you there. you move on with your life.

he doesn't think he cares at first, at all. as you leave after yelling at him about how over everything you are, he literally rolls his eyes and talks to himself about how dumb and dramatic you are. and he keeps living his life.

then 2 weeks go by, again your fights are usually done with within a week, so it's unusual for you to take this long to come back. so he texts you - blocked. he texts you on something else - blocked. he doesn't understand why this is pissing him off so much.

he goes to your house, banging on the door, but no answer. he stays around the area for a few hours but you don't come back, so he finds something to write a little note on your door to tell u to stop being stupid and leaves.

another week goes by and still nothing. now he's actively looking for you. he's going insane. all of his emotions feel bottled up and he doesn't know whether to be mad, cry, or be happy that he doesn't have to worry about you anymore. he's just anxious and all he knows is that at least seeing you will solve is problems

it's been over a month now, and he's distraught. he's mad at you, but he misses you. he sits there overthinking everything he said to you and even though he doesn't really want to put in the effort to change, he does know he treated you badly. he didn't know how he viewed your relationship but you took it serious, so he should have at least tried to. no one else is willing to put so much effort into him, and he fucked it up

he does still have his league assignments though, and this one assignment sends him a bit further away. he decides to fuck around with people, and he's 'chasing' some loser into an alley way with his hand lit up in flames, kinda snickering at how pathetic this person looks terrified out of their mind.

but suddenly, as the rando turns a corner, someone comes out of it, and both you and dabi are surprised to see each other.

you had run off to stay with a friend in this city, and were trying to go to the store while staying off the main streets (being close to dabi for months kinda had an affect on your reputation, so heroes tended to at least stop you to talk if nothing worse)

after a good few seconds of awkward staring, you turned around and booked it. all your hard work was going down the drain and u panicked and ran.

and that was the 2nd thing. you ran from him. he fucked up so badly that you took 1 look at him and ran. he didn't even realize that you noticed the way his eyes got all watery from seeing you, he looked like a kicked puppy.

he was genuinely just sad. still very angry, but sad. he couldn't even bring himself to chase after you, so he just made his way home.

you had been somewhat missing him this whole time, but you didn't regret what you did until you saw his face. it didn't change anything he did, and it didn't mean he loved you or anything, but now you really missed him.

so, you went back to your apartment, but after being gone for a month ur utilities weren't on, and you couldn't be bothered to fix all that yet, so you decided to go back to dabis.

you didn't even knock once you got there, you just let yourself in, having been given a spare key a while ago, but he wasn't there.

so to pass the time, you waited in his bed, and ended up falling asleep. a few hours later, you woke up to the feeling of someone laying behind you, with their arms lazily placed over your side, and you recognized dabis scent so you just went back to sleep

this whole ordeal wasn't really brought up by either of you. dabi thought about all the things you've ever asked him to fix, although he wasn't always actually listening so he didn't remember everything, and he slowly started trying

it did take a while for things to get better, but slowly but surely they did. he'd still throw fits and bitch about things you ask of him, and he'd probably have things he needs you to change too, but you guys would work it out

now, back to just pure headcanons, for when the relationship is good

one second he's overly rough with you then the next he's overly soft. this can be taken either sexually or innocently. he likes to bully you and mess with you in ways that most people would probably think is genuinely mean, but he's not trying to actually hurt you

if he did hurt you on accident he might call u a baby at first but then he'd apologize and like rub his fingers over where u got hurt

he tries to act sneaky with his affection, he wants you to more so be like "when did this happen?" "when did we start cuddling?" that way you 'don't realize' he initiated it. even though obviously you will

kisses are surprisingly gentle. he doesn't really like biting at your lips or shoving his tongue down your throat, they're a lot more gentle and intimate than you'd think

he doesn't kiss you often though, at least not full blown kisses because they hurt his lip, but you'll get pecks here and there. the bottom lip doesn't have too many nerve endings left, but sometimes kisses pull at the staples in his cheeks and that does hurt

showers are hard for him too. he's stinky. again, most of his burnt areas don't feel too much pain, some none at all, but it's kind of just a general uncomfortableness. also, he swears he can feel water seeping in between his flesh where he has his staples. so the only way he's gonna bathe is if you help him (at first, eventually he gets the motivation to do it himself) and he more so prefers sitting in a full tub while he gets scrubbed down and all that, he hates showers

he would set anyone who flirts with you on fire. 0 hesitation. he is possessive, and as your relationship gets healthier he gets more possessive.

he's a nerd, especially when it comes to space. so a serious date he would take you on is stargazing, and he'd describe any constellation or other cool thing he can find to you

he's pretty good at drawing, he'd definitely want tattoos if he was able to get them, but he says that there's no point considering the state of his skin. so, he designs some for you, whether you get them done is up to you. he'd also love if you got him a tattoo gun to do it for you

I love you isn't said until far into the relationship. it gets to a point where it's known between both of you, but neither of you say it. you want to, but you're worried it'll upset him, and he's scared to. in his mind, despite everything you've been through and how much he clearly cares about you, if he doesn't say it, it's not true. which means if you do leave, he can pretend he doesn't care

but he does say it eventually, when you're sleeping and he thinks you're fully asleep. however, you're not, and hearing him say that immediately woke you up and you startled him as your eyes shot open and you looked at him smiling huge

he dead ass tried to run but you grabbed him and told him you love him too, and he basically went yeah whatever :/ and left but it was to hide from embarrassment

dabi, no matter how much he tries to work on his relationship with you, has tons of issues. he's angry, he's anxious and depressed. sometimes something is gonna happen and he might take it out on you, and at first he won't acknowledge it. eventually he will though, and apologizes when he's calmed down some

also, he does want to stay with you, but that doesn't stop him from wanting to achieve his revenge on his family. the only thing that's changed is that he is more determined to make it out alive. he even considers faking his death afterwards, or letting people think he died getting his revenge, that way he doesn't have to deal with all the villain bs anymore

#dabi #touya todoroki #dabi imagine #dabi headcanons #dabi scenario #dabi x reader #bnha #mha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #league of villains

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berrieluv · 2 years

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cw. sex, fights and man thinking they're in the right when they're not. I enjoyed writing this silly things about matt murdock, who's my current obsession in this little break I had for Día de los muertos, tomorrow I'm back at school and work :c

"... and there isn't a small part of yourself that tells you; and listen, this may sound incredible insane" Karen continued with a bit of sarcasm in her voice after Matt shut up for a second after complaining for ten minutes straight "But maybe you're wrong?"

Matt looked at her and mocked her, because how could he be wrong.

Y/N isn't sleeping at my place at the moment.

Was what started all this talk. Foggy asked why the place suddenly felt quiet and dark when he got used to having your colored stuff around and your voice echoing the brick walls.

"How can I be wrong, she's the dumb one"

He simply asked, as if Karen's accusations were completely out of this world.

"Maybe you could start respecting her, and you wouldn't be in this situation"

She hasn't talk to me in two weeks.

Matt said, trying to look as it didn't bothered him when in reality he had no idea on what to do with himself. He got so use to you being there to put him back together that now that he was by his own again he didn't know what to do.

"I respect her..." He started, and Karen looked at him, incredulous "I don't call her dumb in her face"

"Is not... Is not how you direct at her but how you express yourself of the one you love in front of other what is a key on respect" Matt groaned, as if it was the most complicated thing to do. "Everyone like their partner talking wonders about them, I can tell you she does. You're a hero for her"

"I'm kind of a hero"

"You're an imbecile"

You helped Matt inside his apartment and drop his arm as soon as the door was closed, his face is 'looking' at your direction and you see him frown.

"Are you mad at me or something?" He started, and you look at him incredulous, forgetting he can't see the look in your face "You haven't talk to me the whole way here"

You revolved around the place, picking up some of your things and trying to ease your anger. Knowing it wouldn't take you far to speak to Matt like that.

"Why were you making fun of me the whole night?"

You ask, calmly, trying to maintain yourself together. He hates when you do that, he hates how you start those type of questions with a 'why', with a low and almost breaking voice, as if he had been wrong, as if anything he does is enough for you. Trying to get him to feel guilty about the way he decides to express himself, trying to make him feel guilty about being him.

"You disrespected me... In front of people who are, incredible important for me... for my job"

He is about to talk and you cut him, knowing he's about to excuse himself, as if you knew he wasn't thinking of an apology "Is almost as you don't think I'm good at what I do"

"Darling..." He starts, mocking, "You're an assistant" You open your mouth and look at him with a frown "You- you can't be possible be good at your job... you're just... at your job"

You were done. You closed your mouth and started packing the things you left there just last night, knowing Matt could sense you moving around and not talking to him, making him go crazy because he heard your heart racing fast but he didn't know what you were thinking, how you felt about the, well, the truth he just said. Because he was firmly believing it was the truth.

"And for the record... My job really is important... I– I do a lot of things Matt and if you were paying attention and weren't too busy in mocking me you would've heard that I am up for a promotion. I– I'm next to have my own office and– why am I bothering explaining this to you" you say when you look the stupid smile planted in his face, as if he was waiting for you to finish and disregard any feelings you have towards this "You wouldn't get shit done without Karen, your assistant"

"Karen isn't–"

"God, shut up!" You raise your voice, throwing a mascara to his face, a bit disappointed that he stopped it before it could hit his face. You wanted to hurt him the same way he was hurting you "I'm tired of... of everything, of people telling I'm too dumb to notice things, of people thinking I'm just made to be someone's pretty wife when I'm– I'm so much more than that..." you sigh "I know, I know I can be dumb but I'm so smart, I'm so dedicated and hardworking and pretty and if people started to focus less in the last part and start acknowledging the others..."

"Baby, you don't even need to work. You're stressing yourself over nothing" He starts, missing completely the point of your speech "I'm making a lot of money, and when Nelson and Murdock is on its peak I'll be able to buy you everything you want"

He smiles, as if he just said the thing you wanted to hear, and the worst of this is that he was proud of what he just said.

You stop talking, tired, knowing he couldn't possibly understand because he was a smart, handsome white man, things came served in silver tray for him.

You get close to him, bags in hand but he can't possibly know that, he just smiles at your closeness, your heartbeat slower this time and next thing he knows his back is arching and his hands go straight to his crotch. You knew damn well it wasn't fair from you to hit a blind man, but you didn't hit him because he was blind, you did it because he was an asshole.

"I'll be back when you learn to respect me. My feelings and what I do. When you show me you know I'm not a trophy and just like you I want to be showed off for my merits and not just for being your pretty little bimbo girlfriend"

Of course Matt didn't tell the story like that to his friends. And he didn't acknowledge the mascara still laying on the floor, he knew it was somewhere around the apartment, he has step on it a few times, but he believed you had to come and pick it up, since you were the one who left it there.

"Why don't you apologize" Foggy said, eating from the Chinese food that was delivered, knowing that if you were they would be eating one of the best home-cooked meals. "I mean, you were kinda wrong"

Matt looked at him, incredulous "How- How was I wrong? For lighting up the place with my jokes and stealing the spotlight? I'm sorry I'm funny and handsome"

"I just don't think that was happened" Karen said.

"What kind of jokes were you making?" Foggy asked, with the fork pointing at Matt "Because I just know you're not good at jokes if they're not to make fun about people"

Matt gets suddenly nervous, maybe his mistake was saying the word 'joke' in the conversation.

"Oh, God, Matt" Karen said again "You fucking asshole"

Matt liked to make fun of you. Everyone knew that, and most of the time they were harmless jokes, even you laughed at them, and the moments you pouted Matt would kiss you, reassuring you that you were the best thing that happened to him, and he couldn't be happier.

So he didn't know what went wrong this time. Maybe it was your uncomfortable look telling him, begging him, to stop. Maybe it was how you pulled away from his kisses, trying to show a professional behavior to the people around. Maybe it was how you murmured a little 'stop it' in his ear, with a fake smile he couldn't see and a tone of anger in your voice. Or maybe it was how you dragged him away from the people and asked him to stop with the tasteless jokes. But how was he supposed to read your mind.

"Maybe I was wrong" He says, starting to repeat the events of the night in his head, and not knowing how all your signs of discomfort passed by him. "God, I was an ass"

You hated spending time alone. You hated how big your department was and you hated how your dad called you every five fucking minutes to ask why Matt wasn't around.

You hated how Matt wasn't there to hug you from behind and leave a walk of kisses on your neck while you were working, you hated how much you missed him and how much you wanted to run to him and forget everything that happened.

But he deserved this. And if he wasn't one to apologize this time, and show you he was mature enough to be in a relationship, maybe this was the end of you both. Because you couldn't possibly picture yourself in a relationship where you had to admit you were wrong because he couldn't possibly grab his balls and accept he wasn't in the right.

Your bell rings and you let it go, thinking it was the packages you ordered, then it goes again, and again, this time more insistent. And you rolled your eyes at the insistence.

When you open the door the first thing you see is Matt, standing with ordinary clothes, a tight shirt, making his muscles notorious and reminding you why you didn't last much mad at him. You were lucky he was wearing a loose suit that day. You cross your arms and look at him.

"What do you want, Matthew"

"I'm sorry" He starts, and that's the only thing you wanted to hear, but it took him two weeks, and now it wasn't enough. "I'm really sorry I– I disrespected you and I shouldn't have done that and I, I know you're mad but you said you will be here when I learned my lesson and I, I really love you"

"Yeah, good for you" You start. Still on the door frame, not making space for him to go in or inviting him.

"I really mean it, Y/N. I was an asshole and it took me too long to realize it and– You know I'm not good with... feelings"

"Oh, no, you're amazing at feelings, Matthew. You fall in love with every girl who talks nice to you and shows you a bit of decency, hell you even fall in love with those who doesn't, you're a manwhore. So don't come to me saying feelings aren't your thing because I just know they are"

"I–"

"You need to learn to admit you're wrong"

"I was wrong"

You look at him and sigh, you wanted to hear a sincere 'I was wrong', you wanted him to be really sorry, to show you he could grown into a man who admits his mistakes, a husband, maybe a father.

"How can I believe it when you don't believe it yourself?" He quickly falls at his knees and you look around, it's not everyday that you have Matt Murdock, the Daredevil, begging on his knees. "Don't be ridiculous, Matthew. You look pathetic"

"Baby, baby, baby..." He prays, hugging your arms and murmuring 'sorry' a thousand times.

"Get up"

And he does, after saying 'Anything you want' and taking your face in his hands. "How can I make this better? How can I make you believe me?"

And you believed him, because Matt wasn't one to tell you lies. He has never lie about anything in your relationship and you couldn't get to believe he would start today. Because if he decided to lie over this fight, he would've done it days ago, but he took his time, he worked in his case and got to realize he was really wrong. But you loved seeing a pretty man in pain.

"Matt, get in" You told him, and he obeyed, and just as quickly as the door closed your lips were in his. Wildly devouring him, taking his face with both of your hands and showing him how much you missed him.

Your hands hit his when he tries to touch you. You guide him to the couch and throw him there, getting rid of your pajamas shorts and pushing his chest so his back was touching the couch again. Matt could smell your arousal, your neediness, and he grinned, proud of himself.

You take his glasses and throw them to some place in your department, hoping they break so he would finally get another ones. A pretty ones this time.

Now your hands are on the base of the couch and your pussy's on Matt's face, and he eats it, like a starved man, which he kinda was, he haven't taste you in so long he needed this.

He didn't complain, he couldn't possibly know you were about to ride his face, but how could he say anything about it, when his hands were holding your hips, making sure they were leaving marks.

He moved his hands to your thighs and caressed them, completely forgetting Foggy and Karen where downstairs in the car, waiting for him to tell them if he made it right or things were finally over.

You started moaning louder, knowing Matt hated when you tried to be silent. Your chest rests in the wall of the couch while Matt keeps moving his tongue down there, tasting your wetness and making you cum. This time in surprise, no adverting him, not asking for permission because this was for your pleasure, and it was for you to do what you wanted, you needed him to understand control could play both parts.

When you need to get down, feeling your sore pussy begging for him to stop, he holds your thighs stronger and continues eating you out, your body shaking, and he knows what he's doing, because he knows your body and he knows how sensitive you get after coming.

"Need you, baby" He says "Need you in my cock"

You shake your hand, this wasn't about him and what he needed, and he didn't seem to understand it yet.

"We do what I want this time, Matt" You moan "We– ugh, fuck– you do what I want"

He nods, getting your pussy off his face and coming closer to yours, kissing your lips and putting one of his hands in your neck.

"What do you need, princess? What do you want, my love?" And he knew what it was, his cock, but it needed to be cleared that this was because you needed it, and not him. "You need my cock, don't you? My pretty baby needs my cock? You– fuck you got it, princess. You need my cock just take it, it's yours and only yours"

You're quick to lower his sweatpants to his knees, being greet by his big and pink cock looking at you, your mouth drools and you can't decide if you want it in your mouth or your pussy first.

"Let me fill you up, doll" He says when you start taking his cock in your pussy "Fuck, fuck, you, you're so good at this"

You chuckle, because you were barely moving but he was so needy it was almost funny. It would be funny if you weren't in the same state. And you could mock him, but you would be spitting up.

"Matt..." You start "I need you to understand, fuck, that you can't be thinking things for this long I– I need you to know what you want and where– God, yes, yes, like that– where, where we stand"

"I love you" He thrusts into you "I love you and–" He thrusts again, this time his finger was in your clit, circling it and making imposible for you to keep your eyes open "And I'm sorry, I was, I was wrong. I was wrong and you were right"

And know you understood why man loved being right, why they loved dominating over anything, because Matt saying out loud what you already knew was hotter than anything you've get him to say.

"Say it again"

He frowned, and you repeated your words "You– you were right?" You moan "You were right and I was wrong" He says as he feels you riding him faster "I was so wrong, princess. I'm so–sorry, you were right"

You moan and nod, resting your hands in his soft chest and impulsing yourself to go faster, making Matt moan when his cum finally taints your walls.

#matt murdock one shot #matt murdock angst #matt murdock smut #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock x fem!reader smut #matt murdock x plus size reader #daredevil x female reader #daredevil x you #daredevil x reader #daredevil smut #daredevil x y/n #daredevil imagine

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teaboot · 3 months

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Since I've seen many posts about people missing how common asks used to be, I have been trying to send to more asks to engage more. I really don't want to bother anyone though so I'd love to know if you enjoy receiving asks and if so what kind of asks. Detailed? Vague? Work? Fandom? Movies? Books? Childhood? Gardening? Thoughts? OTPs? OCs? I'm sure there are way more categories, I'm not limiting you to these listed options. Perhaps if it's an easier question what types of asks do you not like?

pPAAASGGFYGGJIK THANK YOU?

Detailed asks good yes

Vague asks??? Do not understand but open to the concept

Fandom: My first Fandom was X-Men, then Lord of the Rings, then Homestuck, Transformers, Fullmetal Alchemist, Teen Wolf, Avengers (first movie, when it came out), Batman, Overwatch briefly, Mass Effect, Gravity Falls, Trigun, and now my sister's getting me into Call of Duty! Feel free to ask about any!!

Movies: Yes movies are a great topic I have SO MANY

Oh lord I haven't consistently been up to date on books in FOREVER but yes books are good, you can ask book questions, I'm reading a lot of old classics and recently finished Pride & Prejudice, am now on The One That Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

Childhood- oh my god bud you have no idea

Gardening- My house is full of plastic plants on account of how good I am at killing things

Thoughts- Always

OTPs YO YES

OCs? YO YEAH GO FOR IT I NEVER TALK ABOUT THEM aaaaah I need to start writing again- I've been working on an urban fantasy for like. God like 7-8 years now

If I don't like an ask I'll just ignore or delete it but not much is off the table. I will not answer where exactly I live, who I am, if I'm a specific person you met, etc. for safety reasons.

I've worked in sex education so I can answer questions on that topic but if you get too personal or abrasive I will not respond.

I'm regularly flooded with donation requests and it's often too hard to figure out which are real and which are scams using stolen legit posts so as a general rule I do not spread those, I'm sorry.

And if you pop in to sexually harass me or use abusive language towards myself or others then I'm just gonna block you and delete the message.

If you want to warn me that a post I shared came from a bad source I do appreciate that, but if I do my research and can't find a legitimate reason to block someone then I probably won't.

I consider Legitimate Reasons to block someone on recommendation to be abusive language and behaviour, threats, bigotry, propagation of misinformation, production of AI content, and encouragement of dangerous behaviors that pose genuine harm to self or others. I'm not gonna block a random cause they enjoy Steven Universe and you think it's annoying. We all like stuff.

Womp-womp.

Thanks for asking!!! I probably shoulda talked about some of this myself, lol

EDIT: Terfs and radfems are block on sight, it's not your fault you're dumb but I am not capable of educating all of you

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pillarsalt · 3 months

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hi Im the same ex transmasc anon who sent you that aask about rhe tumblr ban thing, I did a lot of reading without forcing myself away this time. (I used to look at radblr sometimes bc I got curious, but when it started making too much sense i would make myself stop reading and tell myself I was being manipulated and try to forget about it..looking back that probably wasnt normal haha,)

I have mixed feelings tho. I don’t regret looking closer, the amount of sexism in the trans community was horrible. I think even radfems don’t understand how bad it was because it was all subtle styff. But seeing it constantly irl and online was terrible for me as a female. It gave me so much internalized misogyny, it made me hate myself and I felt worthless and stupid! and whiny! and annoying! all the time!! unless I was able to be perceived as a man. I felt like I had to be a man to have any respect in the community. I remember being so amazed to see abortion be covered by trans people I followed in even a reblog because it was the first time I saw people in the community talk about female issues at all. Even then it was covered with disclaimers and terfs DNI banners. male,opinions were always prioritized.

I thought this was dysphoria and a sign I was really a man. then I started reading radfem things and its like that feeling instantly lifted. I felt respected, listened to, even though I wasn’t speaking. It was also like all this stuff I’d internalized from being female, all the trauma around sex based oppression, was actually being addressed. in trans circles you get called a terf for acknowledging females face any kind of oppression (they acknowledge sex when it’s to talk about how hard male loneliness is on young trans women, and how the incel to trans woman pipeline happens, though…)

but the reason I have mixed feelings is bc I now feel….dumb? And afraid. And angry. I spend well over a decade being part of this community, half my friends are in the community, I’ve been trans since I was 9. My typings not the best… dyslexia sucks lol. But I like to think I’m smart. Now I don’t know,

And it makes me think totally different of these people I saw as progressive cis male allies, who were so loud about trans rights and hating JKR and terfs. Now they just feel like the same flavor of anti-feminist man I hate.

And the community is so huge and it’s so widely accepted and I don’t know how to deal!

But I am happy to be a woman now. In a healthy way I haven’t been for a long time. thats all that matters.

I'm sorry for everything you were put through. Many girls and women have been sucked into this thinking it will provide a solution for their distress at the social ramifications of the body they're born in, only for more people, namely men, to take advantage of their distress and gain power over them. As you mentioned, even "cis" men get in on the action when they justify intimidating and threatening women with violence in response to perceived transphobia. It's a terrible situation to be in. Made worse when you can't openly talk about with people you're close to for fear of alienating them.

I think you should give yourself more credit. You ARE smart. You questioned what you were told was never allowed to be questioned and realized you were being misled. And what you said about trying to make yourself forget the realizations you've had, that is normal. It's a difficult and scary thing to hold opinions that conflict with those of the majority of your peers. I think it's like the climax of cognitive dissonance -- when what you know is true clashes so hard against what you want to believe, you find it impossible to justify anymore, so you just resort to pretending you never learned the information in the first place. Been there.

I'm just being a stereotype now, but there's a classic Dworkin quote for this:

"Many women, I think, resist feminism because it is an agony to be fully conscious of the brutal misogyny which permeates culture, society, and all personal relationships."

Anyway my point is, don't beat yourself up. I'm really happy to read that you're accepting your womanhood, it's a hard journey but it's worth it to have a good relationship with yourself. And in my experience (at the sage and wisened age of 25) that it gets easier as you get older. You work through mistakes, and that prepares you to handle the next mistake better. You're right, your health and happiness is all that matters, keep striving for that and it will steer you right.

I wanted to give you some reading recommendations, you mentioned you have dyslexia but I believe these two are available in audiobook form if that's up your alley:

Delusions of Gender: How Our Minds, Society, and Neurosexism Create Difference by Cordelia Fine

Invisible Women: Exposing Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado Perez

There are tons more great books on feminism but these two are my go-tos for hard facts on gender, socialization, and the systematic discrimination against women worldwide through biases that are built into society.

Well uh; TLDR thanks for gracing my inbox, anon :) Hope you keep well.

#ask

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chuuyascumsock · 8 months

Note

Okay here come the ramblings of a madman!

(Been listening to the hills x the colour of violet x creepin)

Basically the messiest highschool drama ever. Highschool AU, but everyone's 18/19, close to graduation and you as the beloved Reader have been friends with both Dazai and Chuuya for ages.

And from here on, two routes. Albeit overlaps, different paths

We got the Dazai route where he's obviously the end goal and the Chuuya one where you end up with Chuu, duh.

For Dazais route, after having been close with both for ages. You and Dazai even had a friend's with benefits situation going on, with real good casual sex, everything was perfect in his mind but you and Dazai seem now to grow apart, hanging out alone feels awkward, you only seem to really laugh when Chuuya is the one talking, you don't message him really outside of school related stuff anymore and he's just convinced you're in love with Chuuya and he's totally fine with that, but can't deny he's hurt.

Because, as stupid as it sounds to himself, he accidentally might have fallen in love. So while he knows Chuuya is the better person for you, it eats him up that you leave him and he cannot even do anything about it.

The final party of the year before graduation comes up, you, Chuuya and Dazai agree to go as friends together and it goes all well for a while until Dazai has to watch you and Chuuya dance and not handling it well at all, he goes outside, wanting to rewire his brain into not loving you anymore because in his mind you deserve to be happy with Chuuya.

You come outside to him after a while wanting to know why he left and while there Dazai goes "so when are you and Chuuya gonna make it official?" But you just laugh, asking him what he's thinking. Refusing to elaborate, you two remain in silence, only the muffled music from inside being audible. You ask him to just say what's on his mind, he cannot hide his brooding from you, you know him to well, and seeing that he ain't got anything to lose by now, since if you brutally reject him, he can always cut ties Inna few months time, he simply states: "I like you too much." To which you tell him you perhaps do that too and that's why you needed distance, not wanting to have your heart broken by him if the aloofness he had always displayed after sex was all he actually felt for you.

Well enough for sexy bandage man for now, let's go down Chuuyas route. We ain't besties with Dazai here, he's simply the mysterious hot guy people wanna get with.

Chuuya is unbelievably in love with you, has been for a while now, but there was this one thing he really hates about you. Your dumb, stupid crush on a certain mummy cosplayer.

After you manage to get with Dazai once after a party at Akutagawas, you're left heartbroken and Chuuya picks up the pieces, somehow slipping into having casual sex ever so often with you, when you ask him to, but you're never allowed to kiss or d couples stuff, that's one rule you made. He kinda knows he's basically just a rebound while you keep chasing Dazai.

Just imagine how he has to watch you roll over, grabbing your phone from your discarded clothes because you check if Dazai answered you just after you fucked.

One weekend when he asks if you wanna come over and just hang out you don't reply for hours, only late in the afternoon giving him a pityful "sry, am at Dazais." And he basically just accepts defeat that yeah, he lost, if Dazai invited you over he pretty much knew what it meant.

But to his surprise you ask him to come over at almost midnight. Being something in-between desperate and wanting to be a good friend, he does come by, being instructed to sit on the couch with you in his lap. He just expects more meaningless sex and is halfway to turning his brain off, when you talk to him.

"I'm sorry." "What."

"Dazai is a fucking idiot and I am too."

"I always told you the shitty mackerel is nothing but trouble, and I'd know but why are you an idiot?"

And you simply kiss him, turning it into a full out make out session that makes clear how desperate the man beneath you has been for this. Briefly pulling away you just tell him "because I have you and didn't even know It until I realized that you made me feel more than he ever could."

---

Im sorry this is so long and so messy because I'm just writing down whatever comes into my mind and uggghhh but tadaaaa. I really soaked up the messy drama vibes from the song and ran with it.

- 🪷

Not you pulling out an entire series plot out your ass rn. THIS IS GREAT THOUGH. I LOVE THE ANGST, MAKES MY EYES WET (platonically).

But poor Chuuya, I’d choose him in a heartbeat over Dazai’s scrunkly self cause Ik he’d treat me so right. Also the Dazai angst was just 😭

AH I WANT THEM BOTH I WANT THEM BOTH— (here’s some of my Dazai/Chuuya thirst messages in regards to my claims of wanting them. Call me an Oreo cause I wanna be double stuffed ykwim 🤭)

#chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara x reader #dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #chuuya smut #dazai smut

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selfshipping-central · 6 days

Note

Hey can I get a death note matchup please? if not thats fine! <3 Romantic please! I would prefer men if thats okay!

Female, she/her, ExFJ 2w3, Leo

Personality:

I am pretty social, however I prefer to spend time alone! I care about others a lot… To an unhealthy amount honestly but I'm working on it! I love to help others and make them smile, but I do wish I would get something for being so nice in return, yeah it might sound greedy but I want to be appreciated! And get something nice haha, like just a compliment or something, when my helping and kindness gets unnoticed I might get upset because of how tired I am and I just want to be appreciated like I said before 😭 I wanted to be noticed and not ignored! I care too much about what others feel and think and it's tiring, I just want to be selfish sometimes and care about myself even if it sounds mean. I also love being mentioned/involved in things, it makes me feel liked <3

People call me funny! Well it all depends because everyone has a different sense of humor! But I am most of the time unserious and I love to joke around, serious situations are stressful so I prefer to be joyful, but I do like talking about serious topics (sometimes) Like I said before I love to make people smile and laugh with my jokes and overall with make them happy with presence. It's my job to make others happy <3

My humor is definitely not for everyone, it's mostly the humor of a 12 y/o kid which can be annoying to some people lmao (sometimes it's funny how people are annoyed by it) and some other things depending on how I feel. When it comes to annoyance I also like to annoy people <3 it's so fun! But I never want to make them really feel bad! Often I act like an asshole but this is just for jokes! (but sometimes I wanna be a real asshole lmao) Like I said I don't want them to actually feel bad, if I do, I will feel very guilty! When it comes to it I apologize A LOT, I apologize so much that it might too annoying but I always feel a sense of guilt inside of me. I'm also VERY sensitive and worry about everything. Ah and I'm pretty dumb and I am not trying to insult myself I am just silly hehe and I'm okay with that. Oh and Im clumsy 😭😭

People know that I am horny 24/7, like I said earlier I have a humor of a 12 y/o so there are a lot of sex jokes. I am very interested in nsfw things, kinks etc, I am the "horny" friend

Likes/Dislikes:

I LOVE LOVE horror and scary things, I can't imagine my life without it, its just a such interesting genre that makes me happy and intrigued! I adore horror games and I'm mostly interested in them, however most of the time I am scared of playing them so I just watch gameplays and stuff like that haha. You can say I am obssesed with horror! (its funny because its easy to scare me haha)

I love to eat food <3 especially sweet things

I also love cute things! Plushies, pink, clothes and other cute things! I just love it so much <3

I like games very much (I suck at them), art, anime, drawing and psychology! When it comes to music I love energetic ones!

I dislike slow music but there can be some exceptions.

I dislike cooking (I love when someone knows to cook however I suck at it

Appearance:

Around 156 cm height

Chubby

brown eyes

chin length hair with bangs

round glasses

If thats too much info then I apologize! O_O

Have a nice day/night and thank you!

Fandom: Death Note

Mello!! (Romantic)

(Now apologises because I haven't read Death Note in a hot minute [Like four years] so if I get anything wrong my dearest apologises. I'm going to re-read it anyways.) Also!! All of this information is greatly appreciated because it was easy for me to pair you with someone and come up with head cannons!!

Now I was gonna pair you with L at first, but you mentioned your humour and high sex drive and L seems like the type of guy to be too busy to find your humour funny, and deal with your high libido.

Mello on the other hand fits you perfectly. (Last I remember he's extroverted.)

Mello would most defiantly appreciate your company. He strikes me as a touchy person, so he'd always have his hand on your hip/arm/waist.

Does this in front of everyone too.

He has little to no shame.

"Give me your hand. Ok and? Let them watch I want my girlfriend's hand."

He defiantly thinks your glasses are adorable!!

Might steal them to try them out too...

"Ooooh... blurry... ok headache ack- here you take them."

Your humour defiantly eases the mood, and tension when it comes to finding Kira (Maybe Matsuda would be a good fit for you too? Ahhh I have to re-read Death Note so badd つ﹏⊂)

Finds your clumsiness cute too!! And very very funny...

"Watch it. You'll trip." and then trips you and giggles when you start yelling at him for it. "What! I warned ya."

The kind of guy to pull you away to kiss your lips and then get really flushed. Or, alternatively; make out with you in front of everyone and not care. Really depends on the mood.

"Come here. I want to kiss you. So what if everyone's watching. I don't care."

Would 100% play horror games with you!! He strikes me as the player while you sit there and cheer him on. Or scream in his ear.

"Don't fucking- Where did it go- where- oh there it is. You can let go of my arm- wait pause. What was that. No I swear I saw something. The fuck do you mean you can't see it?! It was right there!!"

He could be having the most serious conversation ever and you're sitting there, doodling on his arm, or on paper next to him.

He let's you draw all over him. Might start calling you his 'mini tattoo artist'.

It's not the same when he's talkiing about work and the feeling of the pen/marker isn't dragging across his skin.

"Look I drew us as cats! Do you like it?"

"I would kill for you."

Oh, my goddd he LOVES how chubby you are!!! Thinks that you are so soft to layy onnnn. Please let him lay on your thighs while he eats his chocolate and play with his hair <3

"Come here. I want to lay on you. You're really soft."

He would share his chocolate with you.

"Just one bite- like a nibble- no that's too much- back up a little- yea ok you can have that much- Wh- That wasn't a nibble!!"

Oh, you two bicker and get into so many playful arguments for no reason other than to watch the other get more annoyed. (And maybe release some pent-up energy?)

"Keep fucking talking and we'll really see what that mouth is good for."

Defiantly buys you leather jackets, gloves whatever to dress you up.

Thinks you look amazing in his style of clothes.

"Is that my... jacket? No no... you can wear it..."

Cannot get enough of you and your body or your kisses, to him they taste better than any chocolate.

Even better, get chocolate flavoured lip gloss/Chapstick or just eat some chocolate from his stash beforehand (try not to get caught!!) and then kiss him.

Watch him melt and moan out in pure bliss.

And here he thought you couldn't taste any better.

Thank you sooo much for requesting love <33 This was so much fun to do and lights up my day!! Please do stick around and scream about your f/os in my inbox!! You're always welcome lovely!! (I definatly didn't type this up on my way to school on the bus nope!!)

#matchups #not selfship #ask #friends selfship <3 #ari matches˚༘⋆ ๋࣭ ࣪ ˖

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bitetheriskyrose · 5 months

Note

I can't resist a dare, what are your kinks?

OH LAWD I forgot I said that. I really need to stay off tumblr when I'm first up in the morning and overconfident in my ability to confidently talk about my sexual side. Whelp. Heeeeeeere we go anyway!!!! (I kinda wanna see how long the list gets mwahaha)

Praise kink 'cause duh

Found out this year I am an appreciator of degredation to a degree

Casual day to day and slightly hardcore dominance

CNC with nonverbal safe signals

Oral fixation (hence the nonverbal signals)

Certain types of bondage, not a fan of swings, but getting my hands tied behind my back or to the bed posts is a must try at least once.

Breeding. Must I explain.

Very very light exhibitionism

BDSM, though humiliation isn't a huge turn on for me. I feel that humiliation and just giving me the choice to do something slightly embarrassing for a "reward" is different (e.g. saying something quite dirty that I'm wayyyy too shy to say is fine, you degrading me is fine but having me say non-sexual degrading things about myself is a no no)

I'm quite a big fan of marking. Seeing bruises on my skin has me feeling some type of way.

I adore possessiveness, but I feel it can get hypocritical very quickly so I'd rather the absence of it than have both of those together.

Very slight breath play, mostly prefer choking

Orgasm denial/forced edging

Overstimulation

Now, I do not have that kink where you try to feed someone so much they gain weight. I think it plays into my oral fixation honestly. I just love having people feed me directly sometimes. It feels intimate and full of love whilst showing I've submitted complete control.

I honestly think I'm more of a switch leaning person than a full on submissive. I haven't really explored it as I've not had the opportunity to, but I definitely have desires/fantasies that are more dominant leaning than my usual pleasure fodder.

Free use- offset of CNC

Primal play? I think that's what it's called. Basically if you played a very high stakes game of hide and seek with me in a very thick patch of woods I would not become a recognisable person.

SOMNOPHILIA. HOW COULD I FORGET HER.

Brat taming. Though I'm not the best actress.

Lactation kink. my deep dark secret you didn't see this.

Did I mention praise

Double penetrations, like spit roasting, but with a dildo you can stick to things. I'm not big on sharing or being shared in reality.

I go through phases of adoring the thought of getting kidnapped into the woods, and then sometimes it's a hard no. Probably one of the things I would agree to but it would be tentative and the safe word being used is quite likely.

I don't know if forced reading is considered a kink but trying to read something while other things are happening is a big oofta moment for me

I guess CNC/BDSM already implies it, but rough sex on the whole gets me going quite easily.

I am also a fan of just vanilla stuff! More often than not it's very relaxed scenarios that I get off to since I'm usually trying to help myself sleep.

Most of all, and this is the only requirement, I need banter. The idea of being "beaten" or matched mentally and made to feel like an equal/maybe even a bit less smart than my partner is such a turn on for me. Which sounds ridiculous because I can't word it properly. Basically, though it sounds so conceited, I always feel like I'm 10 steps ahead of people. I like being challenged, and being praised for "winning" any sort of game is equally as arousing as being degraded for not getting it. Everyone's always blowing smoke up my ass about how smart I am, and I have a very hard time believing it. If I've entered into some sort of D/s partnership, it's because I've given complete trust over and I'm going to believe most anything you say. If you say I'm smart, I'm such a good smart girl! If you say what a dumb little whore I am for getting it wrong, I must be just a desperate and silly girl who couldn't focus enough to actually try and beat you

This has gotten ridiculously long and the likelihood of anyone actually having made it to these words is so slim I feel silly.

#believe it or not there's more. I'm just too lazy to list them all #chatting with nonnies #also my size kink plays more into strength difference than actual size #voice kink.

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karusenka · 3 months

Text

!Matchup info!

Female, she/her, ExFJ 2w3, Leo Full typology: ExFJ 2w3 269 sp/so SLUAI FELV

I prefer villians and overall evil characters however I have a soft spot for kind, sweet big men :3 I prefer men in fiction

Personality:

People know that I am horny 24/7, like I said earlier I have a humor of a 12 y/o so there are a lot of sex jokes. I am very interested in nsfw things, kinks etc, I am the "horny" friend

Likes/Dislikes:

I love to eat food <3 especially sweet things

I also love cute things! Plushies, pink, clothes and other cute things! I just love it so much <3

I like games very much (I suck at them), art, anime, drawing and psychology! When it comes to music I love energetic ones!

I dislike slow music but there can be some exceptions.

I dislike cooking (I love when someone knows to cook however I suck at it

Appearance:

Around 156 cm height

Chubby

brown eyes

chin length hair with bangs

round glasses

My fav dynamics, tropes etc. (!cw dead dove!)

power imbalance, yandere x victim, abuse, noncon, opposites attract

#matchup info

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sakebytheriver · 2 years

Text

I'm gonna be real with you all for a second and say the reaction this website and the internet in general had to the news that the number of men under 30 are not having sex has tripled in the last few years was absolutely disgusting and I am disappointed in you all for being so dumb as to not realize there is more to this than just one man isn't getting some pussy

Like I get that it was a Vaush tweet that brought this to your attention and Vaush is well, Vaush and we could talk for hours about him but he's not the focus rn. And also he was fucking right. This is a problem. Like I don't think it's a bad thing to say that there is a problem with the fact that men under 30 are now having issues connecting with people and making meaningful relationships with women. Like this is not a "men think they're entitle to sex" situation this is a "there's something going on with how young men are being socialized by our society" situation. If this was an individual case and not like a well documented problem that is affecting an entire subsection of the male gender then it would be different, but we can't just chock it up to an indiduval incel sitting alone in his basement playing COD 24/7 eating his hot cheetos and drinking his mountain dew who hasn't touched a stick of deodorant in years or whatever other stereotype you had in your brain when you first saw that statistic, because it is not. This is just another part of the isolating and lonliness of patriarchy that says if a man cannot get a woman it is his fault, that there is something inherently wrong with him, something in him is bad and wrong and broken and it is all his fault and not the societal pressure put upon them to be this idealized version of what patriarchy thinks a "real man" is.

A leftist streamer, Shark, posted the most milquetoast little tweet about how he has personally experienced this isolationg experience of finding that dating and connecting to other people in this day and age was really difficult and so he's found it easier to just give into the isolation and not connect to people anymore. And every single comment under his tweet was telling him he was a loser who should just kill himself and stop complaining about being a bitchless virgin

Like bro.

If you saw someone lamenting their own lonliness and your instinct is to tell them to just kill themself well, sorry comrade but I think you might be the problem and I don't think you belong on the left

The isolation and the lonliness and the fact that young men under 30 are not able to connect with people and have sex/intimacy with others is all a combination of the isolation of late stage capitalism mixed with the compounding factor of patriarchy telling men to stuff their feelings down and not to be emotional and that a "real man" deals with his problems in silence on his own or he sticks a gun in his mouth and blows out his brain before he can make his lonliness anyone else's problem. And for all of you to just dogpile that clearly alarming statistic that speaks to more than just the amount of sex these men are having and say that all of the men who reported not having sex were just a bunch of entitled whiny little bitchboys who think they have a right to have sex with women's bodies as if that was even the point of that statistic at all is absolutely abhorrent behavior and I think you need to take a step away from the computer for a while and contemplate why that was your first initial reaction to the news and ask yourself if you might be contributing to the problem rather than helping with solutions. Once again the internet needs to learn reading comprehension and what statistics actually mean to the greater scope of society before jumping to conclusions about the worst most bad faith rebuttals possible

Stop letting dumb manhating TERFs and MRA alpha males pollute your politics to the point where you can't have sympathy for the other 50% of the world's population smh

#ignore me #tw #i dont wanna tag this with anything because i am not looking for an argument #i just want to tell my followers and my mutuals where i stand on this #because like i saw some of you reblogging that post uncritically #and i need you all to not do that please

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veronica-the-vampiric · 10 months

Text

Another rant/vent post, relationship stuff, sorta

Tl:dr at the bottom if you just want the short of it

Okay so like, I'm in another long distance relationship, and it's absolutely wonderful, love him to bits. But the distance is way more of an issue for me cause this touch starved slut got cuddles (plus lil extra) for the first time between last relationship and this one. And now that I know how nice cuddles and stuff are, my mind cannot shut up about wanting it. But, there's a slim chance (if any) that bf and I will be able to see each other for probably a year, maybe two

So now my mind is pretty much breaking down over the knowledge that I'll not feel that loving warmth of another holding me for over a year. And honestly I am just a total mess now

I've talked and talked to him about it, and he is comfortable with me cuddling people, cause "as long as it's not sex it's fine" and while that *is* nice. It doesn't help really at all

Cause limits he set, I am not sure I could find someone to cuddle with, or if I did I'd be more stressed then anything cause I'd be afraid of doing anything in fear of messing up yet another relationship

Even more frustrating, my vibe wand broke, so I am a lot more limited in my ways to pleasure myself without getting dysphoric, which means I don't play much at all, which means my desire for sex is just that much higher

And cause of how my dumb brain works, I struggle to understand why sex and sexual acts are exclusive to only you and your partner, and it's really frustrating

I think I mentioned in a previous rant, but when I got into this relationship it was a poly relationship type deal, and I loved it, I was so glad to have a partner that was open to that kinda stuff. But then turns out him being poly wasn't true, and it was his mind desperately trying to find a way to justify being with me before he broke up with his partner at the time. (this is poorly worded, and so to be clear, this sounds like a way worse situation than it actually was, it's late and can't be bothered to adjust wording)

So tl:dr

I got a taste of physical affection after being touch starved all my life, then ended up in a long distance relationship that I thought would be at least slightly poly/open but it turned out to be exclusively monogamous, and now my mind is breaking down trying to cope with the fact that I am not going to get that physical affection again for probably a year, or two, or more

Thank you for reading, have a lot on my mind and just needed to make the words in my head real, sorry if this doesn't make any sense, I'm very tired

#veronica's thoughts

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happyandticklish · 2 years

Note

Um, hi. Look, I know by now you're probably annoyed by me always sending you posts from someone else's blog just to ask for your opinions on it (and I apologise 😔) but, something about this in particular hasn't been sitting well with me..

I'm just really confused.

Here: [ ◇ L I N K ◇ ]

I... I'm honestly scared to ask because, I'm not entirely sure if this even applies to you & your content. I mean.. on one hand it seems like it does, because, OP mentioned tickle fic blogs that write fics for fictional characters that are canonically not adults, and.. you and others have written a bunch of fics & headcanons for series involving characters that are minors (usually teens) (ie. MHA, South Park, Camp Camp, Gravity Falls, Heartstopper, etc. etc.). But- it's not like you've written anything in a way that's inappropriate/considered gross or illegal irl, if that's what they're implying. I'm not sure if they're talking specically about characters that are, like, under 10, and writing about the tickling in ways that (they feel) are inappropriate.

And about what the last person that reblogged said.. Do you think they were trying to criticise people in the sfw community who (genuinely) say tickling is a platonic bonding/comfort/hyperfixation/coping mechanism for them, or were they criticising people who use that as an excuse to write inappropriate stuff??

(Because *if* it's the former.. that'll just make me disappointed)

I just don't know what to make of this.. What do you think? (And it's fine if you can't think of and answer but still I'd like for you to post so that maybe someone else who's more knowledgable on this subject can better explain)

I'm sorry for bothering you with this. I promise I am not trying to attack or blame anyone here for anything and I'm not trying to start drama. I just really needed a second opinion on this post because I am.. so fricking dumb, and I'm not sure if what they're talking about should be applied to people like you or the fics you write. I just want to make sure they're not badmouthing anyone who doesn't deserve it.

Honestly anon, this is kind of a complicated issue, and while I understand you’re concerned, I’d prefer not to get involved in this too much. It just ends in people getting mad and not coming to agreements and blowing up about things people said, and I don’t want to deal with that. So I’m gonna say my two cents on the issue, but past that, I don’t really want to talk about it.

In the end, it’s fictional. Some people have tickling as a kink, others don’t. Some people are just vaguely interested in it, some people think it’s fun, for others it’s a coping mechanism. There’s also those who view it in a sexual manner, and those who view it romantically, but not necessarily sexually. It really depends on the person; you can’t break it down to it either is or isn’t a kink.

For instance, a lot of people draw art of the MHA characters kissing or cuddling or making out or a million other things, and 99% of the people making that art either aren’t minors, or on the cusp of not being them. And yet, the world thinks that’s fine, despite all of that being either romantic or sexual behavior.

IT DOES NOT MEAN THEY’RE SEXUALIZING MINORS IRL. Or that they view minors in a sexual light.

However, the fact of the manner is, sexual maturity (on a purely physical level) finishes when you’re around 12-15. That’s also around the age people first start getting those urges. You don’t turn 18 and suddenly gain your sexuality for the first time. Even if you abstain from sex (which I highly recommend) until you’re older, you still experience that same desire, you just have the common sense to wait. Minors are exposed to sexuality all the time through media, the internet, their peers, their parents who obviously boinked to even have them. We can try all we want to shield them, but they still see it. And sometimes, people engage in that activity before they’re 18. I’m not gonna determine whether you should wait till you’re 18, whether it’s okay at 16-17, or maybe we should all wait till 26 till our brains finish developing. Regardless, it happens.

And we know that. We advertise it on TV shows, in books, things like Love, Simon, Aristotle & Dante Discover The Secrets of The Universe, Riverdale, Heartstopper (in the comics, and only really implied), Heathers, Never Have I Ever, even fucking Beastars (which no one cares about, because people are more weirded out that animals are fucking as opposed to minors). It’s encouraged in those shows and seen as normal. That is all content the world sees as fine, and child appropriate. The characters in MHA would probably end up having sex before they’re of age, because that’s just what people do and what the show seemed to ramp up to. MHA itself sexualizes practically all the students in the show, all of whom are minors.

And on that note, a lot of people on this site are anywhere around 18-22, which is a weird gap of time to be in in terms of all this stuff. If you’re 18, technically, simping for Todoroki would be considered simping for a minor. If you’re 17, it’s A-OK. And yet, it’s only a 1 year difference that somehow makes or breaks that situation. A lot of people on here made content for minors when they were minors, and then grew up, but still had the content lying around. That doesn’t automatically make them pedophiles, and we should not put that on them. Nor should we insist they delete all that material now that they’re older.

There are also people who can view tickling as both sexual and not sexual, depending on the circumstance, which is something a lot of people on here don’t understand. Just because tickling might be a kink for you, that doesn’t mean that’s the only lense you can view it under.

And all of that notwithstanding, everyone is fictional. No one’s committing a crime, everything’s perfectly legal, so let’s just let it go. Who cares whether you personally object to that? It’s not your business to butt into their business. Let people live their lives, and you do the same. If you have a problem with it, block them, unfollow them, don’t interact, fine, but don’t be a dick. It doesn’t solve anything, and only makes things more convoluted than they need to be.

None of this is directed at you, anon, btw!! This is just my opinion on the subject, so I hope that clarifies. I don’t know if it’s the answer you’re looking for, but it’s what I got, so I hope it helps!

#tickling #important #personal #asks #answered ask

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khodorkovskaya · 1 year

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13.03.23

yesterday was a very thought provoking day so i want to tell you guys about it! lots of stuff about growing up/coming of age, relationships, etc, all that good stuff!

so i went ice skating with my oxford/france bestie and my student as we do every sunday and it was so much fun! im getting more and more confident on the ice! and it was great, i love spending time with friends when we're doing something like an activity , like something with a purpose you know.

then we went to get hot chocolate as we always do and since my student's wife wasn't there, he spilled some tea! we started talking about relationships bc my london bestie was in town this weekend and her bf finally got his visa so he came to our town for the first time ever! it was his first time outside of the uk and his home country so we were all very excited! but anyway, we started talking about relationships bc to be completely honest with you, im not a fan of my bestie's bf, but i'll get to that in a sec. and my student said that he's only been in love 3 times in his life. when we asked him what about his wife, he said it's not really love as in romantic or sexual love, they're just really good companions. and... they've never had sex! which honestly kinda changes my perspective on their whole thing, but also not really. he said they've only ever done kink stuff together bc they're into latex and things like that. and since she's so much younger than him, he's never wanted to have sex with her. as he desciribed it, he's not a zizi kind of guy i.e. he's uninterested in sex in general. and yeah, ive always thought he was somewhere on the asexual spectrum and this confirmed it. anyway, that was a fun fact.

now back to my london bestie and her boyfriend, im not a fan of the guy frankly. he comes off as really uninteresting and they have this whole mother-son dynamic going on, i really don't get it. he's boring and unattractive and also probably asexual or maybe gay bc he's uninterested in sex with my bestie. so i was looking forward to seeing her and i was happy that her bf could finally come to our country, but i would've preferred it if i could talk to my bestie one-on-one without his company yknow? and then my bestie also messaged me saying that she invited another friend of ours to come hang out with us and again... i feel like such a bitch but the friend she invited is just... so uninteresting. the girl has no values and sure, she'll laugh at your jokes and talk about anything, but i can't stand her superficiality. every time i hang out with her i feel like im wasting my time.

so on my way to the bar i was already imagining all the dumb conversations we're gonna be having and how bored i was gonna be, already trying to make up excuses about how i could get myself out of this and go home and work instead of gargling air with two of the most uninteresting people i know. and i felt so shitty because i was supposed to be looking forward to seeing my bestie and i was supposed to be happy about her boyfriend's visa and i was supposed to be happy about seeing that other friend bc i haven't seen her in ages. but i was just dreading it so much oh my god. i don't know what it is. am i a bitch? am i pretencious and arrogant and do i think too highly of myself? i felt awful. and even my ed thoughts were coming up on my way there. i was like "ooo im skipping lunch today im gonna be so skinny yay". like wtf. i wanted to be happy about seeing my bestie but instead i felt guilty and just wanted to go home and work...

anyway, as anticipated, i was bored out of my mind... her boyfriend's attitude was pissing me off. i asked them what they've done these past two days, like what they've visited and what their plans were. and they said that they went to the old town, walked around the lake, ate at mcdonalds and drank wine. which is fine i guess but like... there's so much to do around here and so many things to see! you can have mcdonalds and wine in london and tbh the old town is not really worth visiting if you don't know anything about it, like it's just a couple of pretty houses, it's gonna be boring if you just walk around aimlessly. like idk if i had two days to show our city to someone who's never been, i would've done so much more idk. and then the bf was like "yeahhh this place is boring it's not for me" and when i asked him why, he said that it's because there are a lot of pubs in london and not a lot around here. like duh of course if your only priority is drinking ofc you're gonna be bored anywhere you go. idk that really annoyed me. plus they didn't even go out at night so he didn't even have a point of comparison. like sure, we don't really have pubs like as in english pubs, but we have a lot of cool bars and clubs and other fun night time activities. like i invited them to the disco on ice on saturday, which is sooo much more fun than drinking wine at home come on! but they said no! and our town is the boring one, all right!

then my bestie invited me over for dinner with her parents and her ukrainian friend. and as the night went on the more and more i kept realising that i don't have much in common with her anymore. and it was so heartbreaking bc we grew up together. we had so many integral life moments together but now it seems that they weren't so integral after all. and it sucks because no one else is gonna know what i was like growing up and it feels like such an important part of me. she's the only one who's seen this part of me and yet it has no importance anymore because we barely have anything in common now.

idk it sucks and there's not much to say. we have different lives, different views, different priorities... and i really felt like the odd one out because at the dinner table everyone was kinda on the same page (except for the parents bc they're getting divorced lol but that's another story). at one point bestie's mum asked me where i was at with my studies. she asked me if i still give language lessons and do catsitting and i was like not really. i have one student who's become a friend now and for the cats thing, if my neighbour asks me ofc im gonna help out. but im not actively looking for these kind of jobs like i did in highschool because duhh im an adult now and im working. and then the mum was like "yeah, you should stop doing that. let's find you a real job" and it really like... upset me. because what about our business? no one seemed to care or ask me any questions about it. "where's you shop again?", "you sell clothes???" like guyssss this has been my family's life for years now! and im pretty vocal about what we've been doing and the project we're working on. and yet no one cares. i don't know, it made me really upset. as if everything we've been working on is not serious. as if getting a "real job" is the only thing that matters.

i don't know, i feel like there's a lot to say but there isn't much to say... it's just that me and my bestie have grown apart. and it hurts. it hurts that i can't relate to her anymore. and i don't understand her lifestyle or her opinions or her way of viewing the world. no, i do understand. but it's so unlike me. we don't value the same things. and it sucks.

and then the ukrainian girl was talking about how she went to dubai and how it's the place to be and how she's looking for a husband. and again, i just cannot relate. and felt so left out. like i don't know, ive gone through so much these past couple of months and it's incredible. but i can't share it with anyone because no one cares. everyone has different priorities... my bestie has an office job she's comfortable at, her boyfriend complains about life and wants to move to canada to find himself, bestie's mum is leaving her husband to go live with her lover and worries about how because of the war in ukraine her job's been intense, the ukrainian girl is trying to find a husband in dubai meanwhile her hometown has been destroyed. and i... well.... i can't even explain it.

i suddenly felt really scared of being alone for the rest of my life. i remembered coming home to B and feeling like i had my person. it felt nice imagining that i was not alone because i had him. but ive always felt lonely with him. but coming home and cuddling with him was nice. im scared that i'll never find my person, someone who can see and understand me, all of me. for now the only people i can relate to are "weirdos" like my student and my oxford/france bestie. they're so much fun! but is this how it's supposed to be? how do i fit in with normal people? how do i become normal?

anyway, i walked home and cried and felt very alone.

and then i had a dream about B and how i came home and he wasn't there so i called him and said "i can't do this anymore, it's either me or [his business name]". i woke up feeling satisfied that i had finally said it. but it's too late now, our relationship can't be repaired. and i can't set any ultimatums anymore and make him choose, because i chose to leave. and he chose himself. and im gonna be alone.

#it's interesting bc my student and his wife have everything but sex #they do fun activities together #like hobbies and stuff #and me and B just had the sex and nothing else #so i felt alone and bored #how do you even find someone who satisfies you on every level?#i want a lover #fuck im so sad about this whole thing #im so scared of being alone #march

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dhaaruni · 1 year

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Hi! Hope you’re having a good day - mines been pretty shit tbh so if the tone of this is dumb I’m sorry and it’s also very long and rambling so feel free to ignore but I’m just kind of shocked to see you defend being bdsm (aka being against the sexualisation of abuse and violence particularly against women)?

Like ‘what a man does in the privacy of his own home is his own business’ has always been peoples response to mens abuse. I just don’t understand how is it not incredibly fucked to get off on abuse? How is the physical damage done when strangling/beating/hurting someone in one of the millions of ways people (men) hurt each other (women) different when done consensually? If my boyfriend hits me during sex why is it a big deal if he does it during an argument if he didn’t even hit me as hard during the argument as he did in bed? What if he strangled me in bed (something that could kill me and is one of the biggest indicators that a man will kill you) then hitting me isn’t actually that bad in comparison considering the level of harm. What is the difference between ‘after care’ and bringing your girlfriend flowers after hitting her? How does it not create the same trauma bond? A lot of people into bdsm make it very clear that they are mentally unwell (not judging, I am too just different poor coping mechanisms) and I just don’t see how being a masochist different from self harm. How is bdsm not the biggest example of rape culture? How can you recognise the patriarchy’s influence on so many womens choices but not the choice to want to submit sexuality? How are teen girls supposed to cope with their boyfriends literally wanting to beat and rape them but all the adult sources around them are telling them thats totally normal and not dangerous they just need to consent? Because teenage girls are amazing at enforcing their boundaries and totally don’t give in to peer pressure or do things they don’t want to do for male approval. How are you meant to break up with a man who you know enjoys and is capable of beating and raping you?

TLDR : I’m just trying to understand your perspective because it seems very contradictory to your other views like being against rape, violence against women, anti racist, anti incest ect. just everything that bdsm sexualises and normalises

No you're all good, I don't mind answering lol. I'm not letting this be reblogged for obvious reasons though.

I completely agree with you in that societally speaking, BDSM is constantly used to excuse violence against women and it's really fucked up to get off on hurting others, and any man that says they're into BDSM on principle should likely be in jail.

That said, I also think that in the context of consensual romantic sexual relationships between adults, it's possible to enjoy certain things on occasion that aren't super vanilla on principle. And, I'm not really talking about hookups here, I'm talking long-term relationships with people you trust lol. I'm also not giving teenagers sex advice and I think "blowjobs are empowering" feminism that young millennials and Gen Z was raised on did more harm than good to our perceptions of healthy sexuality, but the rumors are true: I, an unmarried adult woman, enjoy sex with people I romantically like and trust as people lmao.

But to clarify, I'm really not a proponent of anything truly extreme, and I'm extremely intentional about setting boundaries and if anybody crosses them, they get blocked and banned for life. I'm generally cool with trying sex positions, but both parties always have veto privileges if something is painful or uncomfortable or simply not enjoyable. And personally, anything involving metal, spanking or hitting, choking, etc. are all total no-gos for me and I will never be swayed on that. A light hand on the neck is not remotely the same thing as asphyxiation, and to even get to that point, I need to trust the guy.

And, I would never trust let alone fuck a guy who can't get off without that stuff! My point is that it's okay to try things out, whether that's basic kink or weird sex positions that you fall out of and laugh at yourselves, not what you do every single time you have sex. If a guy whines about women being boring in bed or "vanilla," kick the man to the curb lmao.

All that said, I would never tell women they're bad people if they are against stuff I'm personally comfortable with. My point is just that sex isn't like a cut and dry thing, and it's really healthy to communicate and discuss what you like and don't like with your partner.

Does that make sense lol?

#anonymous #answered #sex cw

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a-room-of-my-own · 2 years

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Tbh I know it’s just dumb internet shit but like the stuff that’s been going on with radblr for the past several months genuinely has me really upset. I’m so sick and tired of all the shit talk straight women constantly get on radblr and I hate not being allowed to talk about it with being falsely accused of total bullshit. I hate how saying literally anything at all that might even allude to me having sexual interests invites harassment. I hate being accused of having a “victim mentality” for being upset about the misogynistic harassment I’ve gotten from so-called “radfems”. I hate how sexual the harassment always is. Having random women talk and gossip constantly about straight women’s sex lives is really upsetting. I hate how even on radblr I am defined entirely by my sexuality and whether or not I’ve ever had contact with a dick. I hate being actively pushed out of feminist spaces because my experience with misogyny is “too heterosexual”. I hate how literally all of radblr acts like the misogyny I face isn’t real and doesn’t matter entirely because I’m straight. I hate not being able to talk about it because I don’t want to be labeled a homophobe for doing literally nothing. Like I can’t even say that what they are saying is degrading or violating or hurtful because I’m “playing into lesbophobic stereotypes by calling lesbians mean or perverted” or whatever they want to claim even though I’m literally not doing that! I’m saying that the actions of certain users is disgusting and idc what their sexuality is, this behavior is wildly inappropriate! I hate feeling emotionally violated like this all the time. And I know this is just internet bs but I don’t have any real life feminist groups to go to. They do not exist where I live. Like why are the vast majority of women not allowed to exist in feminism?? And then they complain about that too! Saying nonsense like “het women think that being straight is required for being a woman” when literally the only thing anyone said was that it’s gross to exclude like 90% of all women from feminism and it’s gross to not let us talk about our problems. They act like straight women don’t experience misogyny.

Like this isn’t feminist anymore and I wish they’d all just fuck off already. It’d be a whole lot less miserable and a ton more productive without judgmental women like that. Idk I’m just really hurt and angry. Especially since this all kicked up again with roe getting repealed. It feels like their rubbing salt in the wound you know? I don’t believe them when they say that they’re trying to “help”. I think that it’s intended to be malicious and harmful. They know that no one can call them out on it though. I doubt that any of them even really care about abortion that much since it’s an osa woman’s problem. A while ago they had “it’s not that bad if straight women get raped since they like dick so much” discourse too and this piv nonsense really reminds me of that. I wish I kept receipts, that happened months ago. I wouldn’t be surprised if the worst of those posts got deleted they were really bad. Those women that participate in this junk all the time don’t actually care about women at all I wish they’d go rot in a discord server instead of tumblr. I think a lot of them are pornsick or something because it feels like some of them are genuinely getting off on this. I’m not really allowed to say that though.

First of all I'm very sorry you're upset and feel excluded, I completely understand 💙

I'm not interacting with so called 'radblr' so much also because of what I've read these last 4-5 years. They succeeded at pushing out a lot of women by creating their little toxic echo chamber, and by the number of silent followers I get + several people who sent me asks asking to not publish if it wasn't anonymous, it's obvious something is seriously wrong.

They also tend to periodically forget that not everyone lives in the USA, and that some women here live in countries/places where they can't have these discussions, or are already living in places where abortion is forbidden. And from that angle, this debate is borderline indecent.

#radrama

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kopicetic · 1 year

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Mini update time: I agreed to date him.

I don't know, we have had some massive blow up fights recently that leave us both crying and they're always over his inability to communicate and my shitty hair trigger temper.

This is something that I'm aware of and am actively trying to work on. Usually what happens is that it's just him not telling me something, like that he's been struggling with some issues lately that have affected our sex life. Which I fucking adore this man idk. He's one of my best friends. The problem is I need physical intimacy along with emotional shit, without the physical stuff the emotional side begins to fade for me. If I feel unwanted physically, I cannot be emotionally attached and I am likely to leave.

This normally hasn't been an issue since I have huge issues with intimacy and trust and actively run from actual relationships lol. Like ya girl is fucking turning 35 this year (🤦🏻‍♀️😭🤮) and he is the first actual boyfriend I've ever had because yikes.

He's also the only dude I've ever liked enough to even try with.

I mean I feel like we've had some break-throughs each fight? Lol. One is that we have dramatically different views to fighting. For me, my temper flares up hella fast and like the hounds of Hell are about to swallow you whole, but just as quick it's over and I'm horny af and angry makeup sex is the best etc.

He just feels miserable, wants to cry alone, is so far removed from the idea of even attempting sex, feels drained, etc. Which just means I need to adjust my thinking a bit here. It's been a cycle for me because fighting is almost like foreplay for me. We fight, I'm in the mood, I make a move, he rejects me, I get madbro all over again. But knowing how he feels just means I can switch up my reactions. Ideally we wouldn't fight at all, I fucking hate fighting with him.

One of the reasons he gets super drained is because I selfishly refuse to let him leave before we reach a resolution. He starts being like "It doesn't matter, you've made up your mind, blah blah" and I'm like "No. I want you to explain yourself." The idea of leaving stuff unresolved so we can pick up fighting in the morning sounds horrible to me. I don't know, the idea of leaving him when we're both mad and upset just seems so fucking terrible to me.

Then he explains himself and how shit I've done makes him feel. Some of it is valid. Sometimes, it's anxiety related, he convinces himself that something is true when it's not even remotely the case. The valid stuff I've made note of, realize how I've fucked up, and actively try to stop that kind of toxic bullshit. When it's anxiety driven, I explain what it really is or try and figure out why it comes across that way, etc.

So I don't know, I don't want to keep fighting him over stupid shit but I feel like these previous verbal blow-ups have helped us reach a deeper and better understanding?

Like he's hella introverted. Has no friends really, hates talking to people. We met through Pokémon Go, and they do a weekly hour where it spawns in only legendary raids and since I'm like literally the polar opposite (I'll talk to anyone, I'm happiest when I'm the center of attention and surrounded by people lol) raid hour for me is to catch up with my other Pogo friends, talk to people, hang out, see them face to face, etc. One of my pogo friends always has ridden with me for that.

He goes but he's always super salty because he hates that it can't just be me and him. He hates that I talk to my friends about emotional issues or even anything at all. I mention having a conversation with someone about *topic* and he makes all these loaded comments about how he guesses he's just too stupid for me to talk about whatever with him. Some other friends of mine and I started doing that Hunt A Killer thing to try and have more regular friend time and he suggested we just buy it ourselves and solve them all together because my friends are too dumb to pick up on shit.

The very fact that I've made any personal posts about him at all would DEEPLY upset him, but like I can't keep everything bottled up. I'm not sharing details so idk.

But like the whole thing is that we've realized that, because he's not a talker, has no friends (the four people he lists off that he speaks to are me, his dog, his son, and his dad) BY CHOICE, and struggles to open up to anyone means that he finds our conversations romantically and emotionally fulfilling. They make him feel bonded and intimate and like we're being super close. Even our text messages have that effect for him.

I literally talk to people all day lol, I have my group chat bubble open at all times, I'm constantly texting and DMing and snapping people, talking is just a thing I do lol, it's like a basic level bodily function with me lol, without talking to people I'd die. 🤣🤣🤣

It doesn't make me feel close to him. It's not intimate. It doesn't replace being able to physically touch his skin or wind my fingers in his hair or have sex with him or anything like that. Not even close. Kissing and cuddling feel way too intimate for me, I always used to have a no kissing rule because it feels more personal than sex but I make out with this man all the time because at least we're physically close and I can feel his heart beat and hear him breathe. Post-coital cuddling is one of my least favorite things to do and I deal with it for him.

So Idk, I feel like this new understanding is massive. We get each other more.

I don't even know where I was going with this post lol. Anyway he was really drunk and I was just pretty drunk when I told him I'd actually date him if he promised to tell me shit and that I would focus on methods of toning down the spontaneous rage. I'm kinda hoping he forgot because honestly we fight over the same shit constantly. Telling him we could be in a relationship feels like a stopgap, a desperate attempt to make this trainwreck work.

I don't get what massive difference calling him my boyfriend and him getting to tell his family about his girlfriend makes. I didn't understand. But it's super important to him and also his self esteem so like maybe it will work from an anxiety reducing standpoint.

And he opened up a bit all on his own today, told me about feeling depressed. He failed his classes last semester, something I feel hella guilty about, and it's been fucking with him, but then he said "You're worth failing for. " Bruh, no one is worth mortgaging your future over. He chose to spend time with me over focusing on school because he cared more about going places with me and getting to kiss me and hold hands than he did on maintaining his 4.0 I just. 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ That doesn't help me feel any less guilty tbh.

Anyway this was so fucking long, if anyone actually read this whole thing then goddamn.

#personal shit

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