will you ever come back, or is this an indefinite hiatus/straight up dipping?

i don't know

all the i miss yous are making me want to come back but ik i would just be terrified and motionless as soon as i do

Vent-ish Rant downstairs

CW: Pedophilia, Antisemitism, Suicide, Ableism, Harassment, Bullying, all the important words except for murder basically

i want to fix things in private with the people who hurt me so things can be okay and I don't out them for being wieners

but i also want everyone to know who hurt me, yet I'm aware it's not the right choice to make. social media outrage barely leads to anything, specially where minors are concerned

hell,now that i think about it, considering the fact that they genuinely don't believe people older than them are allowed to have feelings, I don't even think talking would be the right move

it's scary, its fucking scary

fuck. the whole thing started with a person mocking the way i spoke about crowley telling me to stop babying him because i was a legal adult and shouldn't be speaking like that

i had just turned 18 and the person was only a year younger than me

like when it's gone to that point and shit is that fucked up, what can one person even do

i remember i laughed about it back then but truth be told, every single little thing I've been told and that I've listened to coming from the people who hurt me has fucking destroyed me as a person

I looked at my older Discord messages, from before this whole mess started. I was so fucking happy and shameless with my joy, now look at my sorry ass

i just.

it's crazy that i have to go around masking in social media of all places because there are people that take such offense to me being cringe that they legitimately turn into high school mean girls

it's crazy that there are people who claim I'm something i am not because they want to make me look bad in the eyes of their little circlejerking friend groups so they can feel like the hero of the story

it's crazy that empathy goes completely out of the window when an account is big, that people don't see human beings as human beings when they're behind a screen

"just log off lol" i am a lonely shut in motherfucker due to my autism (that, surprise surprise, hinders my ability to socialize), you do not understand what you're asking of me, specially while being in this country and at this point in time where I'm actively craving to kick the metaphorical bucket, at daily risk of doing so, and what basically is house arrest for my own safety and well being

(aka, avoiding to physically yeet myself into upcoming traffic or buying something to actually seal the deal)

thus far I've been accused of antisemitism, pedophilia, being too self-centered (which. bro, the reason why i talk about myself is because it's the one thing i can comment on without being scared of some random person coming to tell me "NuH uH" about it out of nowhere or worse, having their feelings hurt because I don't agree with them 100%), proshipper (which, to those people, the word implies wonderful labels such as "incest apologist" "pedophile" (again) "abuse endorser" among other things) ((sidenote, I'm on neither side on that particular discourse. my friends from both sides know this. I would elaborate on my stance if this wasn't already long enough, but it is, so I'm leaving it at an "I don't care, you do you, but please leave me out of it")), being... mean... because i blocked someone...? (this one is just. that's how the second wave of hate started btw. yeah, because i blocked someone. holy fuck), and there's probably a handful of other things I haven't seen yet. fuck it, there's probably someone out there calling me a zoophile because of my catboy au

My friends who I will not name because I don't want the high school mean girls crusade to get to them, have helped me stash out evidence for all of the accusations and bullying.

fuck, they were the ones who let me know about it on the first place, both actions for which i am eternally thankful for because it means I can defend myself properly should the occasion arise (dios no quiera)

I've already had to make a post on Xitter responding to the antisemitism and pedophilia claims, in which, for the latter, i had to reveal extremely personal information for the people who started this to give me respite if only for a while

and. ugh

What I'm trying to get at with all of this is. it's. coming back is scary. i want to but at the same time I don't think I can take this shit anymore

I wish I had people defending me like this when the harassment started because I'm a spineless little bitch who'd rather talk things out and at least be neutral with people than clap back and tell them to stop being stinky

but what's done is done and now i just gotta figure out how to fix my head before i do something stupid

this is not the full story obviously, I'm cutting off certain details as well as more personal depression stuff to not make this bible longer than it already is

fuck

TLDR: I need a hug, idk if I'm coming back, I probably will cuz I can't say no to people, and some teenagers are horrible

I noticed that you reposted something that is along the lines of proship

I agree with leaving media alone but I think its incredibly disgusting when people ship, for example siblings, because what it feels to me is that they have an incest fetish or something

I know just because someone writes about murder doesnt mean they support it, and I believe that. but usually when people write about murder it's in a negative context, obviously showing how it is so incomprehensible to outsiders about how someone could do that, or showing how we need to get these people help.

trying to apply this to, for example, incest, if someone ships an incestuous relationship then it seems like it would be in a good context, and it seems like they support it should it be in real life. that's how I view this all. (itd be different if they shipped siblings as a strange headcanon and talking about how it's bad... this reasoning I can understand the most to the point where I can let myself ignore it)

how am I supposed to learn to not care? especially when they are really outward about it?

okay.

I do not participate in shipping discourse because I do not participate in shipping. I'm not really In Fandom anymore like, generally. I don't... care.

Because of this I had literally no idea what you were referring to in this ask. I had to scroll. So far back. To get to this post, which also doesn't refer to shipping discourse.

I also have not talked about incest here, and the post in question doesn't talk about incest.

It's about murder. And gore. Which you say here is fine.

Literally why did you send me this ask.

And like... there's a fair chance this is just bait, and there's also enough of a chance that you're genuinely asking that, like, fuck it. I'm gonna get shit no matter what I do, so I may as well try to do a little good.

You use the words "feels" and "seems" a lot in this ask. And I'm really glad you did, actually, because I think it's honest; you're operating on your feelings and assumptions, and that's really important to keep in mind.

And your feelings on this are valid! It's normal to be uncomfortable with certain content, and it's normal to not want to see or engage in it. You don't need to feel any differently about those things. You don't have to consume incestuous content, you don't have to be okay with it, and you don't have to be around it.

But ask yourself: you assume that other people engaging in this content means they support it in real life, but what if they don't? What if you're wrong?

Maybe they're saying it's wrong in a way you're just not picking up on, or that you don't recognize. Maybe they aren't saying it's wrong; maybe it's in the context. Maybe it's in a genre trope in a genre you're not familiar with. Maybe it's irony or satire that you aren't picking up on. Maybe they aren't saying it at all, but that's still what they think, and they just chose not to put it in that content for... who knows what reason. Maybe they're literally just bad at writing.

What then?

Sometimes you're going to feel or assume that something is going on, and you're just gonna be wrong. And you could ask who's fault that is- did you fail to pick up on something you should have been able to, or did they fail to communicate it well enough?- but like, what are you going to do with that information?

Sometimes people are not very good at literary analysis, and sometimes people are not very good at writing, and that's just part of learning. Do we tell everyone not to attempt to talk about certain topics unless they're "good enough" to do it "right"? How do we know when someone's "good enough", and how do they get to that point without practice? Do we just ban those topics altogether? What topics do we ban- where's the line? How do we enforce it? How do we prevent that from being weaponized against marginalized people?

Anon, you asked me how you can "not care" about these things existing. And I think that's a valid question; you feel there is injustice, and you want to stop it. That can be a very noble impulse, and it can be harnessed for a lot of good.

But it can also be really, really toxic- not just to the people you hurt because you act on assumptions and impulses that are incorrect, but to yourself. You can't control everything. You can't control how other people feel, whether or how they engage in certain topics, or what they do or say. You just can't. And trying, or wanting to try, or thinking you should try- it's going to drive you nuts.

So here's how not to care:

Remind yourself that you might be wrong. Take a moment to think about all the things you don't know for certain, and the things you would need to know to be absolutely, 100% sure that you're right.

Consider how important this is to you. How close is this person to you? How important is this issue? What would it feel like to let this go- would it continue to impact you? Do you have other options? (removing yourself from the situation, blocking tags/posts/people, etc.)

Consider what you can do, and what you should do. Think about the tools at your disposal, the power you have in this situation, and how likely this person is to listen to you. Think about whether those tools are ethical. Again, what if you're wrong? Is there any reason you might regret your actions?

If you still feel like it's worth addressing, start by asking questions. Make sure you really know what's going on, and if (and when) the situation changes with new information, walk through this process again. Repeat back what you believe is happening until they confirm that you're right, decide again whether this is worth it, and then proceed.

Sometimes it's more effective to just vent to someone else, or to make a post about the issue generally without confronting that person- especially considering your assumptions might be wrong! Maybe it's worth it to talk about what you thought was happening, but you don't know that what you thought was happening is what was actually happening. You can still talk about it, just, y'know, without making it an attack on someone else.

And again, I don't give a shit about fandom discourse. This is important to me because these are themes that crop up in regular-ass media all the time, and disagreements that crop up in regular-ass relationships with friends and family and loved ones. I think it's important that people have the skills to navigate disagreements, unintentional harm, and perceived slights in healthy, productive ways.

You can't live your whole life demanding that everyone agree with you on everything, or blaming other people for everything you misinterpret or assume incorrectly. You cannot assume that everything that hurts you was designed to hurt you. You can recognize that these are assumptions and feelings, and that's great! And I hope you're being honest when you say that you want to learn to let things go.

Thoughts on 3D

So Jungkook's collab with Jack Harlow is out. It is catchy; it will go viral. I have purchased it; I will add it to my new releases playlists--same as I do for all our boys.

But while the dancing was cool and JK's parts are okay (I'm not thrilled that the word "girl" is used literally 20 times, but I get what the western music industry is), I was--I need to be honest here--really taken aback and unhappy with how misogynistic Jack Harlow's rap lyrics were. As far as I'm concerned, he's absolutely unnecessary, and I'll be supporting the alternate version with a lot more enthusiasm.

A deeper look at the lyrics and more of my thoughts are under the cut if you're interested (but by clicking, you're agreeing to keep it respectful in the comments or you'll get banned.)

All my ABG's get cute for me I had one girl (One girl), too boring Two girls (Two girls), that was cool for me Three girls, damn, dude's horny Four girls, okay now you whorin' (Hey, hey, hey) Hey, I'm loose I done put these shrooms to good use

Setting young women up in a line and talking about how sleeping with just one is too boring but sleeping with four is whorish? Yeah, miss me with it.

Then there's this:

You won't regret me (You won't regret me) Champagne confetti (Champagne confetti) I wanna see it In motion In 3D (Show it to me, girl, now, why?)

I was given to understand that "ABG" stands for "Asian Baby Girl" and refers to an Asian party girl who likes clubbing, wearing excessive makeup and tattoos, and revealing clothes, etc.

I also learned from Urban Dictionary—which can be an unreliable site with outdated or incorrect information—that "champagne" has referred to underage girls in the past and "confetti" or nowadays “champagne confetti” refers to orgasm, or sometimes when a group of men or women surround someone, masturbate, and then ejaculate on them.

Not even going to get into the shrooms thing. I'm not in a hyper conservative country with harsh punishments for those type of drugs so... I was a bit taken aback about a song about being fucked right, and now there's lyrics about what amounts to harem girls.

*sigh* Do you know how much I hope I'm reading into things incorrectly? Please correct me if I'm misunderstanding the innuendo, but this is what urban dictionary says. I'm 44 and live in a cave. Maybe I'm wrong.

But in any case, the vibe of Jack's parts in the video was not coming off respectful.

I don't care how many other rap songs objectify and insult women--I won't get behind any content that does. And don't even try to gaslight me or other ARMY into saying we should like this because it's comparatively worse in other rap songs. Don't try to suppress any discourse about it, either--let women discuss how they feel about how they are represented. Don't police women. Don't silence women.

BTS' rap music got so much better once they incorporated feminist feedback, so I'm used to a higher standard and I won't be lowering those standards for anyone. I have no hang ups about sex, but please miss. me. with. misogynistic. bullshit.

Then again, it seems some of the rap hyungs were on board with this.

So I guess industry pros have a different take on stuff like this!

*shrug*

Okay, we have established that I really don't like Jack Harlow's contributions to this song. Which means I'll support the alternative. Thank goodness they had the foresight to provide an alternative!

Now I can work for JK's charts in a way that doesn't aggravate my conscience. All good. Enough said on 3D.

Personally? I really hope JJK1 showcases JK's range of genres, but also has a range of topics besides pursuing girls or being cool.

I just can't vibe with a fuckboy persona; I never liked Justin Bieber or Justin Timberlake for that very reason, even if some of their songs sound fine. Now, if Jungkook really admires their style and wants to pursue it, I'm not going to rag on him for it. Of course not. It's his choice and I can respect people's choices without making the same choices myself.

I will always try to support our members as far as I can, even if not everything is my cup of tea.

But I can't help hoping for something personal and authentic and substantive, when it's just Jungkook coming to us without a collab. (And with Scooter at the helm for an all-English EP, I guess I'm not holding my breath. But maybe this is all part of the learning and growing process. Time will tell.)

Please know that I don't expect other people to suit me and my tastes, but neither will I enthusiastically support content with my time and money when they don't suit me at all or actually really turn me off, ya feel me? It's a real and respectful relationship I have with BTS and their music; not performative. I don't follow along quietly out of obligation, but rather a sincere joy to participate.

I love Jungkook deeply. He's a sweet and intelligent and kind-hearted young man. Amazingly talented and humble. Sincere, open to being vulnerable, protective of those whom he loves. He donates to kid's hospitals, for goodness sake. Jeon Jungkook is a good egg.

I guess I'm just sort of feeling a bit whelmed by the type of music that is in vogue these days. JK worked hard, he did well on his parts. I just am hoping his album showcases some of the emotional depth and meaningful thoughts I have seen from him in the past, if I'm being purely honest. *shrug*

Those are my less-than-two cents. Of course, you may have a vastly different perspective and I appreciate that. Just please keep it respectful of all members and each other in the comments here. It's been a long day and I desperately need some real rest now. I'm trusting I can post this and not come back to a warzone.

I've got a Friday Thirst post in the queue for you guys, and then I'll be taking a bit of a break from social media for a few days to work on work deadlines. Please keep voting for Jimin and of course stream and buy for Jungkook and other new releases.

Sending you all so much love!

~Roo

astarion opinion post (ascension discourse incoming)

ascended astarion discourse is all over my tumblr rn so i thought id throw my 2 cents in. this isnt gonna make a lot of sense, probably, and keep in mind ive never played BG3, im just OBSESSED with the silly vampire man (and watched the supercut of all of his romance and personal quest scenes)

opinions under cut (to spare those who dont want the discourse and are just here for hot vampire man)

okay so. ive seen like...3 opinions about him. those being "do what you want, its ur playthrough", "ascending astarion turns him into an abuser"/"youre a horrible person for ascending astarion" and "ascended astarion hot" me personally, I agree with two of those statements.

HOWEVER. on the moral-ness of the whole...ascension thing.

post ascension, does he ever abuse tav? because I have yet to see anything even suggesting he does so.

yes, its going to be bloody. of course it is, it's DnD in the 3rd dimension. its going to be bloody. Did you not realize how bloody the actual game of DnD is? you commit a LOT of murder in that game

Subpoint: how many murders in bg3 is too many? because iirc you cannot play the game pacifist...this aint undertale, my friend.

Have you never so deeply desired revenge over your abusers? because I'd like to give what's been done to me 3fold, and i've only dealt with abuse for 5 years. Imagine 200 years of abuse in a way that we literally cannot understand because it's not possible in our universe. OF COURSE astarion wants to be stronger than cazador, and to get his revenge on cazador. HE'S BEEN ABUSED.

Seriously I cannot stress this enough his desire to hurt cazador is so that he cannot be abused again.

segway: and if you knew, that doing this one thing, would prevent you from suffering any of the negative side effects of a condition you've had for a WHILE, would you not do it? Don't say no, don't lie to me.

and about the spawns: again. you are not a horrible person for commiting murder in a video game. it is a video game, they are just pixels. what you would do in a video game does not always line up with real life.

In conclusion, who needs morals when you have good hair?

also i would let astarion drain me like a capri-sun and my last words would be thank you

To me it’s obvious that it’s Wilbur. The timeline matches up. Shelby said he was british, a musician, messy, had an ant infestation, and had to ‘go away’ for a while. She also said he was famous with a large platform. All Wilbur. With just that, okay I understand (but don’t agree) why people are saying it’s just speculation. But much more concrete that any of that, one of the trumpeters who used to tour with him and then abruptly stopped for no reason, came out and responded Shelby saying she was also bitten. There are a few other clips of women mentioning that he bites, he even has a bit where he’ll pretend to bite the camera. It’s clear that Shelby’s abuser has a biting fetish/fixation, or at least had a desire to hurt her without an ‘obvious’ overtone of violence.

Shelby is smart. Even without the past dating rumours, all of this clearly leads to Wilbur. If it wasn’t him, personally I think she would’ve said something because she knows people will assume it’s him. She said she no longer wants to protect this person because she believes he is dangerous. She wants people to know who abuser is.

The thing is, as soon as she comes out and confirms it’s him, actually says a name, all of a sudden the conversation and discourse will shift. Right now people are arguing about whether or not it’s alright to speculate. If she says it’s him, people will be arguing about whether or not she’s lying. Also, at the moment she is just telling her story. If she says it’s wilbur, suddenly it’s an accusation, and will get a lot more attention.

I think he is her abuser, and i genuinely think this is something you need to seriously consider and think about. If you watched her vod, whoever her abuser is- is a very bad person who physically and psychologically abused her. She said herself the stuff she mentioned is only the beginning.

I’ve been pretty quiet about my thoughts on my account mainly because yes, there’s always a chance that i’m wrong. But i’ve been thinking about it since shelby’s stream.

Was I not clear anon? I literally don't care. I care that shubble getting support from her friends and is healing from it. I don't care if it was Wilbur or not.

Why is this something I "genuinely need to consider?" I don't know him. I have no effect on his future actions. I'm not a wilbur fan so I have no personal stake in it either. It's fucked up that you're focusing so much on the possibly identity of the accuser and not supporting the victim.

(and btw, no matter how many "hints" they give, it's not gonna make it ok that you're choosing to focus on hunting down the "Bad guy" rather than helping the victim heal and move on by NOT GOING FUCKING CRAZY OVER SOMEONE ELSE'S POSSIBLE INVOLVEMENT)

whats your opinion on the current punk discourse? i find it really stupid personally, it really just feels like the same discourse that always happens (young punks denying punk history, older punks not wanting to let their culture change, them fighting about it) but i want to hear your thoughts since im still fairly new to the culture.

OKAY. Please forgive me if words don't work right, I'm very tired at the moment. That said, I do have an opinion on this topic.

You mention that its the 'current' punk discourse, but honestly, I'd argue its been *the* punk discourse since at least the 2000s. By that point, the scene had been around for 30 years, long enough to have veteran punks and people very fresh to the punk community. Though, I will admit that I'm lucky in that I don't see much of this online both because of how picky I tend to be with the blogs I follow, but also because of the nature of my own blog. Many people find safety-pin-punk from my Punk 101 posts that are focused on history and culture, consequently, most of my audience has at least some willingness to learn and has an interest in that topic.

And while generational gaps certainly *do* cause riffs within the punk community, its certainly not something limited to punks, or even alternative communities for that matter. Just look at the stereotypical american family gathering. Nobody is happy because nobody agrees. Best said perhaps by lyrics from both The Ataris and The Living End

I point that out because my opinion on how it should be addressed within the punk community is the same as how it should be addressed in society as a whole. Younger people SHOULD be taking the time to learn their history and know how we got to where we are. Knowing where we started and the fights we've dealt with are important to being able to move even further. On the other side, older people NEED to actively work to challenge their beliefs and acknowledge that its okay for things to evolve and change over time.

The most talked about example of this phenomenon I've seen is the "Nazis aren't punk/where do you think the phrase Nazi punks fuck off comes from?" And I think anyone who is involved in online discourse over this fails to be able to see this argument from the other side. Yes Nazis used to be in punk spaces. But then they were kicked out (Nazi Punks Fuck Off). And now no one wants to let them back (Nazis aren't punk). I genuinely don't understand why people get upset over this. Not every post that talks about what punk has become needs to address its history. Not every post that addresses its history needs to bring up the current state. And people on both ends of any argument like this need to stop thinking they are superior than the other side, and instead start trying to use their brain cells and understand nuance in situations and conversations.

To that one anon,

I absolutely agree that actively hating on JK is veryyy uncalled for when we can see Jikook doing great and we don't have all the bts information. Lately, though, I've also seen a lot of Jikook accts minimizing what happened to FACE and Jimin. Celebrating JK's achievements is one thing but I cannot stand to see jkks of all ppl downgrading what happened to Jimin and his records as they're broken by the extra push the company gives JK. Everyone is speculating and trying their best to understand things and for some, that's sidelining Jimin as an accessory to make it make sense. There needs to be fair discourse in all sides of this community without romanticizing the darker parts of it. It's not JK's fault and we don't know all, but we still need to be able to talk about it. Like the fact that some of LC's numbers disappeared right when Seven needed space on the Korean charts. The fact that the FACE wasn't restocked for months when seven was in ready supply almost every week. What happened to LC and the rise of Seven is related even on a minor scale. This is a fact. Some accts were so focused on debunking videos, and celebrating JK that the topic of where Jimin's award nominations and streams are going became taboo because apparently "Jimin is happy as a cheerleader" ...what?!

Actively hating is way too far I agree but all I'm saying is we should still be able to talk about the inequality regarding them as individuals and how that relates to Jikook as a whole. Believing in Jikook and discussing these things should not be mutually exclusive. Everyone has their own opinions. Again not supporting the hate, but we should be allowed to share thoughts shouldn't we, regardless if we won't all agree?

No, I dont disagree. But personally talking about it just seems to get people riled up and that's how Jikookers end up resenting JK. I would rather copy paste a PJM on twitter when they are tagging BH and Geffen and anyone else fucking over Jimin.

I haven't 4go10 everything our man has been through. This man has millions of fans and they only released 13k LC cds. Meanwhile other members got up to 50k. His shit not getting restocked even still?? You cannot tell me this is something Jimin would be okay with. His fans wanting to buy his music and not being able to? No way he's just okay with this.

But I also fail to see how he's not aware of it?? He has to be aware of what happened to him.

(New video here for those who are yet to watch it. As always they do Jimin Jimin great justice)

The 🛴 thing is confusing seeing as he's credited on FACE but whatever.

Unfortunately we will never know how he feels or whats going on unless he or one of the members outright tell us about it. The unfairness is so bad if I look at it too much it makes me tear up. I haven't 4go10 he is still the only member who didn't get a cake. I know it's just a cake but damn this always rubs me the wrong way. @magicshop-pjm1 gets it 🤭🤭🤭

All I know anon, which makes me less sad, is the fact that Jimin renewed with Hybe. That has to mean something. And so I will just be here and support him the best way I can. I am choosing to trust his decision here because we are clearly missing something.

I don't post these asks because tbh they are a downer and they make everyone upset. I don't like to be upset. Until we know the truth I would rather avoid the topic all together. But that's just me 😔😔 It doesn't do me any favours.

But yes, Jikookers should be able to discuss whats been going on without being called JK antis. Provided they're not acting like JK antis.

i also believe most "anti-transandrophobia people" aren't shitty people. i remember when the "bi lesbian" thing came up, people were really quick to jump to conclusions based on a viral post mocking the concept. when people advocate against an idea, there's the unsaid "if you support this, then you're a bad person!" so most people don't think critically about it, especially if it doesn't directly concern them. they'll assume they're doing the right thing and they might even add it to their DNI list.

also due to the nature of the internet, stirring up outrage is effective. people think they're immune, but they're not. especially on tumblr, if you say something in mockery similar to the way the "funnymen" do, you're likely to get people behind you. not to mention the cult of personalities that are able to proliferate exclusionist ideas easily. most people on here might just touch an exclusionist idea and absorb it partially, even if they're not actively partaking in any shenanigans.

unfortunately, this is niche internet discourse. most people won't think about it much. they don't have time to check out all the discourse points and will take others at their word because they want to be a decent person. (i am of course, only describing some of the people i've seen, not all)

Yeah, while I feel there are definitely shit stirrers around who just are using this opportunity to be awful towards us, for me it's a matter of genuinely understanding how some people that are against transandrophobia have come to this conclusion, and still feeling pretty hurt anyways. Like, I need people to take a moment and think before attacking and fear mongering about a group of trans people for Christ's sake. When I first heard about all this, it was seeing some posts about how privileged trans man are, and feeling that was pretty silly and unbelievable. I saw some people critiquing that sentiment and learned about the word "transandrophobia" from there, which seemed like a no brainer and good step forward for the community. I have indeed been on the other side of a lot of transandrophobia from the community since figuring myself out, and it was nice to see this discussion happening. However, when a lot of people seemed to become extremely against this seemingly overnight, it frightened me, it honestly made me feel unsafe in my social circle. I questioned myself extensively, reading up on feminist theory, trying to determine if I really was being as misogynistic as they claimed. It tanked my mental health for months, but I wholly believe our concepts are sound, and that trans men should be able to have a word of our own and the freedom to talk about our pain full stop.

It's like, even the people who think they are in the right are being transphobic about us all the time. A lot of tenants of their arguments are transandrophobic in nature, and then will refuse to accept criticism because they've already determined we're irrational hysterical thought seductors, and that saying transphobic things towards us would be okay anyway since we deserve to be hurt. When a lot of us say that a lot of people in the online community have drunk the 'ra/d/fem KoolAid', I tend agree with them. There are a lot of imbedded lines of thought I honestly don't know how to combat. And it makes me feel pretty unsafe in the community, and I don't think I deserve that, or anyone deserves that really. A lot of trans allies are much much more transandrophobic than they believe and it's disturbing to see so out in the open. I'm just... So disappointed in people constantly. You're right, if someone says something with the usual 'tumblr funnyman' contempt, people just tend to believe it. But it makes me angry! How dare people be manipulated so easily, have such shaky morals that they're willing to act so uselessly and cruelly without much a thought, or even taking time to have enough information. And it's like, I don't hate you, but it's embarrassing. Exclusionary behavior is always so insidious and embarrassing. I know that's not being completely fair, we are all just... So traumatized. A lot of people within the community tend to be extremely lonely, have had hard lives, and that's just asking for crab bucket behavior. And I can even see why trans women would feel concerned about it too, but I don't think we deserve automatic suspicion either.

I don't think they're fundamentally bad people or anything. I just can't be treated badly, I'm just not going to allow it, and I am certainly not going to like or respect anyone who acts so poorly.

I just hope this discourse is over eventually. I want to love and be loved by this community in turn. I want to actually feel apart of it. I want us all to stand together, it's going to be hard road ahead.

I hated the tr ending so badly. Not because it was rushed or anything. Wakui could have fleshed out the last timeline so thoroughly and logically and I would still hate it because the ending itself goes against what I felt the story stood for in the first place. He replaced all the characters for fakes, none of the characters we were intoduced to had happy endings because they either are totally different people or re lived their life to avoid healing. The ending basically proved izanas last words right "there's no saving me" yeah I guess not if the only way to help everyone is to make sure their lives never happened the way it did. Horrible I hate it so much. Also one ship I hate is rinzu or ranzu because they don't even interact once and it's so popular for no fucking reason other than "its hot" and tbh they would prolly hate eachother like petty bitches, they would NOT get along at any point. Also Koko and amane ship because if people actually read the manga with their eyes open it would not make sense. Anyways thanks for letting me be a hater in ur askbox, I love your blog btw

This is long, also tw for typical tokrev themes and sa

I think you're the first person who has the same opinion as me lmao😭. I also didn't believe it should have had an ending like that at all because of the themes that had been set up during the entire story. I understand people's perspectives of "It's Wakui's manga and it's his ending he can do what he wants" but media is supposed to be talked about, discussed and even criticized at times. That's like, the whole point of publishing stuff. As an enjoyer and supporter of Wakui's manga, I feel like I have the right to question some inconsistencies and contradictions (not directly attack him tho, that's never okay. like people who send death threats over ships and stuff that's messed up) that showed up in the ending. I also believe lots of people didn't really take it seriously as a manga idk. It had some very serious topics that people seem to forget about. For example: suicide, abuse, abandonment, child neglect, substance abuse, extreme violence, rape, prostitution etc, and I think people just kinda see it as a silly manga that has cool characters they like. And that's okay. It's okay to not take a piece of media seriously and enjoy it for the sake of enjoying it, not everything needs to be critically analyzed, but stop shitting on the people who take it seriously enough to question why the fuck it ended how it ended. Lots of the discourse took place between critical analysers who wanted an author to finish the manga by sticking to the themes and messages he has set up the entire time versus casual enjoyers who just wanted everyone to be happy for the sake of liking the characters. And I completely agree with the Izana thing!!!! You cannot claim to have saved someone by rewriting their entire life!!! Takemitchy was not supposed to be god!! Also, isn't the moral story of time travel that you should never ever do it? Because you win some, you lose a whole lot fucking more. I thought Draken dying was setting up that narrative. That saving Mikey, was gonna fuck up a whole lot. Isn't that why Chifuyu broke down?

Idk about you guys, but dark impulses being a curse disappointed me quite a bit. I thought it was supposed to be a symbol of Mikey being deeply mentaly ill. And that he had to deal with it head on and not run away all the time (this was Takemichi's entire storyline basically and the the main theme of TR). I just feel like it sucked because the message of the ending, whether Wakui intended it or not, was that you can't be fixed without magical time traveling. Although the story had some fictional aspects, it was realistic at least. I thought they'd deal with everything that wasn't time travel realistically.

Any ship with Sanzu and the Haitani's is hilarious to me and although I don't ship any of them seriously, the fanarts fun to look at some time (and you're right I think they look good together cause they're hot😭). You are completely correct about them not liking each other tho. It's actually canon. Idk if you remember during the three deities fight when Ran hit Haruchiyo with his baton? Nothing but pure malice between their eyes😭. The Koko and Akane ship actually triggers me because one thing about me? I'm not comfortable with large age gaps. Akane was 5 years older than Koko💀. And I didn't know people took what she said to him seriously. I thought she was just trying to not hurt his feelings? Koko and Inupi were around 7/8 when the fire happened. Meaning Akane was like 12/13. Uhhh Idk bout y'all but I don't think a 13 yo would be attracted to someone that young. And waiting for them to be of age is...😶. Be fr.

Hi! I have just see Jk tracklist and I wanted to share my op -

First: I don't understand why, only because I like Jk as an artist and person, I have to accept blindly every single thing he does. I have my ideas and morals and I apply them consistently. I like seven, I don't like 3D. I am not a prude, simply I find that 3D it's explicit in a dirty way. For example.

So:

• I don't have problems with not writing your lyrics but I'm a little disappointed that in his first album there isn't even 1 or 2 Jk credits. Yes he surely approved and choose carefully but it's not the same thing to really write them, we can't read the lyrics and be like "that's what he think" because we can't be sure that he specifically approved that phrase that we are "analyzing". Meybe that was the only phrase that he doesn't like lol.

• I know he is working hard and I respect him for that, I'm just sorry he is working at something that is not what in my op a lot of fan were expecting

• I think that all those songs will be more the 'no deep meaning' songs, again, nothing wrong with it. But when you are the frontman of a band famous for the deep meaning of their songs people have expectations. So for me the problem is that I and other fans wish to have from bts members the meanings, the ideas, the relatable lyrics, the personal style not songs given by random people. So I personally understand who is disappointed and find it valid.

Still I respect his work.

• note: tae doesn't wrote his lyrics too, but in his case Idk if he received the songs or if the songs were made for him, that is a little big difference.

Let me know if you know and what you think! Ty ♡

Hi anon. Ah, it seems as if you have entered today’s realm of stan culture where you are an anti unless you like every single thing an artist puts out and every single thing they do. That applies to all artists with huge fanbases not only limited to kpop. I’m talking Taylor Swift all other artists fans are moving the same way these days. There is no room for healthy discourse. You are either in or out. I also didn’t like 3D and I still don’t. Do I think that Jungkook knew the sexual innuendos in English that all the y/ns projected onto him? Hell no 🤣 tbh I didn’t know what “champagne confetti” was either and I wish I still didn’t know.

I’m a little disappointed too, but also not really and not surprised. We know Jungkook was having some sort of writers block/burn out around the time FACE was happening and some time after when Jimin was still busy. If it took 10 months to produce Jimin’s album and JK hadn’t even started working in March, then there was no way that he had anything to bring to the table for his album. I really wonder if they were all contractually obligated to release an album (except Jin) before MS. I wouldn’t be surprised if they did, and that would also explain the involvement of western producers and 🛴 grubby hands in everything.

I agree that we can’t project a bunch of deep meanings into these songs considering they were given to JK. Yes, he probably picked through his options, but it’s comparing apples and oranges when his other option would have been songs he personally wrote. And no, not every song written by someone is about their personal life, but songs not written by the artist definitely are not either.

I’m not fully convinced that JK wants to be working this hard tbh. He loves being on stage, but with some of his latest performances, his energy is different. I don’t know how to explain it, but those that can see it, see it.

I understand the disappointment, I do. But to be fair, the rap line have always been the brains behind BTS songs. Not Jungkook. Jungkook has written some great meaningful songs like Magic Shop but the majority have been by RM, Suga, and Hobi. So I am okay with departing that identity from BTS and JK as a solo artist.

True that Tae didn’t write his songs either but that didn’t seem to ruffle as many feathers. I think the fandom has always put a huge weight on Jungkook’s shoulders to be that “golden” maknae that the title has been bestowed on him. He supposed to be able to do it all and do it perfectly in the fandom’s eyes, in kpoppies eyes, in his country’s eyes. I’m glad he is letting some of that pressure go even if this is not the direction that I wanted him to take. I take comfort in knowing that he has people like Jimin to ground him and always remind him of home.

Thanks for the ask.

Gwen Stacy: A Character Study

Spoilers ahead for Across the Spider-Verse

I started typing this in the tags of that last Gwen Stacy reblog and realized I had way too many thoughts on this to flood the tags with. Okay if you didn't read those tags, all I had said at first was that I had seen a lot of discourse about Gwen. Miles doesn't need to take her back, she's a bad friend, how dare she show up at the cookout knowing all she knew (lol that one made me laugh ngl), nothing too heinous but I didn't see a whole lot of forgiveness. Before I get in to this, I'm not excusing her behavior in the slightest. I just think there's a lot more to it than her being a bad friend to Miles. The whole movie, Miles is trying to make a point that he's not a kid. But...he is. The way the adults try to direct his life is juvenille and definitely make it seem like he's younger, but he is still only 15. He gets away with a lot cause he's still just a kid and he's still learning. Gwen doesn't get the same treatment and yet...she's only 15mos older. She's not years older like Hobie or even Peter B.. She's barely 16 herself. Now here's a girl who still blames herself for her best friend's death and who's dad blames her for her best friend's death (unknowingly). She befriends this kid who's just.like.her. Dad's a cop, he's new to being a spider, he's her age, and he too feels alone. But she can't get too close because she hurts the people she loves. She literally STARTS the movie explaining this.

When she finally reveals herself to her father, he turns his back on her. Now here's this group of other spiders who can travel to different dimensions freely and can provide her a fastrack ticket back to Miles. She asks Jessica to adopt her on sight. And that's before her dad even drops her, that's how alone she feels. She already feels like she doesn't have a home. So imagine her probable horror when she finds out that the new best friend she's trying to get back to, is the number 1 enemy of her new "family". He's the cause of a whole host of problems and she's forbidden to tell him. She can't go back home and she can't stay with Miles because she'll glitch without a watch. And she can't even use the watch because she's not supposed to see Miles at all. So what can she do, go back and have her dad arrest her? Or stay with the only people who understand her? They show us in multiple ways that she hangs out with Hobie the most. Now they want us to think there's something there and she probably has a small crush, but that's mostly just cause Hobie's kind of too cool not to have a slight infatuation with him. (And that's coming from someone who doesn't even like guys). But I like to think Hobie also is the only person who doesn't trust Miguel and doesn't really agree with "the plan". So she hangs with the one other person *besides Peter B, who doesn't hate on Miles. I can only imagine how insufferable Miguel probably is about it. So she finally gets an opportunity to be in Miles' dimension and the FIRST thing she does is go to him. Breaks all protocol, ditches her tracking device, and goes to hang out with her best friend.

Now this is the point in which I do believe she could've told him. Especially since the last time she lied, her best friend died. But we've seen Miguel can get unhinged. To a level even Peter B. didn't know he was capable of. She knows they don't like Miles. If she tells him and he goes to confront Miguel and he kills Miles, she's now caused the death of two best friends. If she tells Miles and Miguel finds out, and takes her watch, she's now lost any chance of EVER getting back to Miles not to mention she gets thrown back with her dad...who hates her. So she does what any 16yr old girl would do when faced with a lot of tough decisions....she lies (again), and she runs. First from the Spiderteam and then from Miles. She tries to do what Miles did and have two cakes, but she's bad at it. She's not designed to "break canon" so rule breaking isn't in her nature. I think there's actually a lot more to how much that drives who they all are as people. Which also explains why Miles simply doesn't get it. Even with Hobie, it's in.his.DESIGN to be an anarchist, ergo he's still following his own canon. But Miles doesn't have a canon. So none of his friend's actions are going to make sense to him.

I don't know. I think a lot of Gwen's decisions can be chalked up to "she's a 16yr old girl with her own baggage". She wants to see her best friend but it comes at a cost. A cost she pays for almost immediately when hanging with Miles is the reason the Spot gets even stronger and then escapes. She was supposed to be watching him but she impulsively went to go hang out with her best friend. Thus dragging Miles into the problem because he follows her. Her lying gets people hurt in so many ways. But if she had told Miles the truth, he still would've followed her. He has a thirst for knowledge and a need to help. He was always going to intervene when given the chance. Gwen's choices were between family or friends. Same as Miles. The only difference being, Miles considers them to be the SAME thing thus making the decision to choose, damn near impossible for him. He's close with his family but he can't tell them the truth, so he just needs friends who understand him. She needs both but she told her dad the truth and he turned his back, so if she tells Miles the truth....... She's been told explicitly that she can either have this new family who gets/wants her, or go back to her dad if she chooses Miles (who also gets her on a level that no one else does) but who she can't be with without risk of death by glitch....so she lies. And when she realizes she still has her dad, guess what her first act is? Going back to Miles. So should she have lied to him? No. But would telling him the truth have yielded different results? Honestly, I don't know. But I like to think no. Everything still would've happened, just differently. The Spot still would've gotten away and Miles would still go against Miguel to save his dad and stop the Spot. Unfortunately the only thing her lying did was put tension on their friendship, but she had no way of knowing if telling him would work in anyone's favor.

Now Peter B......I want to know if Miguel threatened him. Cause when Miles asks why he didn't come to see him he says the same thing as Gwen, "I couldn't". Miles doesn't really hear that. He hears "i had the opportunity to see you and I chose differently" but that's not what either of them said. I'm hoping they show us more of that cause there's a lot of power in the word "couldn't".

Sorry for the rant coming.

It's just that the double standards these days are so frustrating. If you ship Jungkook or Tae with a woman, the most you'll get is backlash from fans who think they have a shot with them, or people who just don't think it's true. But if you ship/support Tae and Jungkook together? It's always "Ew, that's gross." "Ew, they're not gay" "You don't know their sexuality", etc etc etc. You don't hear people say, "Ew, they're not straight!" or "You don't know their sexuality" when people are shipping them with women. Because apparently STRAIGHT is okay, but gay is unnatural. People act like questioning if someone is gay is some sort of insult to their character and that straight is the norm or default, which is super homophobic.

I know that Tae and Jungkook's attempts at looking more "straight" in their content has convinced so many fans that they like women only. And I understand that it's almost a safety blanket for them to be perceived as straight. It protects them. I totally get it. But for some reason the fan response annoys me, when maybe it shouldn't. People instantly believe that JK and Tae are straight because there's a woman in their music videos/lyrics. And people will RUN with this idea because they assume it to be true.

But from someone who once closeted themselves, I can't help but see more signs that they aren't straight. But me and people who think similarly to me, always get judged and called weird for thinking that maybe Tae and Jungkook could be bi/gay. Just because we see in between the lines and have observed taekook's relationship differently. It's just hard because I'm on Tae and Jungkook's team. I support them. And yet the people who think they are straight because they believe the fake relationships or fake MV love interests get the benefit of the doubt because it's the society standard. It also seems to be the image that Tae and Jungkook want to give off? Idk Heteronormativity and all that. I guess it's just hard being a supporter sometimes, due to all the hate. I wish the world was different and viewed being gay, bi or anything but straight as just as normal.

Hi anon!

A rant very much needed! I agree. I think fandom discourse around their mv’s and music very often tend to imply that they themselves made the choice to have a female character.. when in reality that is a choice that has been made for them. Even if they themselves agreed to it and even if they came up with the character themselves.. if they really are closeted it will still have been a choice they had to make because there is not really any other option for them.

Tae and Jk (and other idols) aren’t able to choose freely what they put into their art. As long as it’s inbetween the boundaries that are set for them they can probably do a lot.. but boundaries are still there.

The double standards bother me a lot too anon. It is so unfair. We are all just people and who we love shouldn’t have to be a factor into whether we are accepted or not.

Umm not really. Not many tattoo their own initials but he literally tattooed his birth time as a big ass clock so this is possible lol. Also his tattoos are all about him. His birth flower, his Fandom (tattooed right on his knuckles, on a prominent place), his birth time, his motto etc etc so isn't it normal him tattooing his initial ?

Also for me, i see a significant gap between J and M for it to be JM aka JiMin. It looks like 2 different tattoos tbh Jungkook and Army more than cross word Ji Min 🤷‍♀️

Trust me, he knows how his tattoo looks. He is an artist for god sake. Visually more intelligent than most. And he didn't have second thoughts before getting it done.

(birth time, birth flower, dates are all symbolic things, but names aren't symbolic. Names are just names)

Why else did the fandom come up with the all member names theory? Because JM was so IN THEIR FACE that there had to be an explanation for it, right? If the J wasn't there, who would go ahead and think RM and MY and inverted V and clubbing the J for all J initial members. And that theory was so widely accepted that people took it as facts. Because there had to be an explanation for the crossword, right? (Honestly, I was also kinda rolling with that theory too, because I didn't want to be delusional and consider only JM. But then he comes live and says it's just ARMY and J. Which made it more sus, because why tf put J there, near M, making a crossword? We all know you are 'Jungkook'.)

It doesn't need to have romantic connotations because if i have a bff i enlisted together with, maybe i would tattoo their initials too. If there's one thing 2023 has showed us (and the earlier years too), jimin and jungkook are THE best friend duo of the group. The best friends among a group of best friends. Their bond is stronger than anything I've seen.

Somebody on here mentioned the rainy day fight recently. Jungkook not only cried when he fought with Jimin, but he went outside without a destination. Have you experienced that type of distress? He could have just gone home or stayed in the studio, could have just avoided Jimin and waited till they made up. But he walks aimlessly and whom does he call? Jimin. When Jimin said he wouldn't take care of him anymore, it's like he lost his anchor. The one person he was closest to, someone who gave him a safe space in a group of older friends,had refused to take care of him anymore. It removed the ground beneath him. If that doesn't tell you who he's closest to, idk what will. Anyway...back to the topic.

The other explanation (which might be far fetched and just my personal little theory) is J stands for Jeon, his brother's name, family names etc. But idk, that's far fetched.

It still doesn't change the fact about how it looks. Just because it's farther than ARMY doesn't mean it's not a crossword. A very visible one too. And when his fists are curled, it can look far, but when his palm is flat, they are equidistant. Like a crossword. He definitely had his palm straight while getting it tattooed.

All my opinions are personal, anon. Not facts. If i think JM is for Jimin, it's still a personal opinion formed by my own logic. As already stated in my pinned, I don't claim any of the 875 members to be dating. I'm just here to enjoy their dynamics. And I understand, I might be going against JK's own words, but it's just me and few people who agree with me. For the rest of the world, J is Jungkook only.

If you want to see more of my thoughts about it, you can check -

And this-

Also, idk if you are a solo, tkker, or jkker, or lurker, enjoy this little canon compliant ficlet i wrote long back. (Which describes the fandom's reaction and Jungkook's explanation in a fun way)

Scene {members notice army and jm tattoo for the first time}

Jimin: "Jungkook...is that tattoo for me?"

Jungkook:" NO!! J is for ..umm..Jungkook."

RM: *sigh* *starts calling their PR manager*

Jimin: "Where's the K then? You always call yourself JK"

Jungkook:'"........."

Jimin: "It's okay bro, I'll one day write a song for you and call it Letter. To return the gesture of course."

Jungkook:"Would you feature me in it? Like you did with V hyung in Friends?"

Jimin:"So you do admit JM is for me?" 😏

Jungkook: "NOOOO!"

-----------------

Have a nice day!

its just frustrating because the video i made, while under the guise of "hey, i think maybe a more nuanced take on this over-simplified character is a good idea," also had a lot to say about fanon, reductive discourse, fandom puritanism, and retributive justice/prison abolition. i talked in depth about the irony of a story like ace attorney, where culprits of violent crimes are often and frequently portrayed as morally grey/nuanced characters, and where you're trained to be inherently suspicious of the systems that incriminate the accused because you are playing as their defense attorney.

it's a game that encourages you to not see the characters are "victims" and "perpetrators" but instead people, capable of all the good and bad they are, and more often than not multi-faceted. but then you take a look at the fandom and that's ALL it is--people throwing characters into those two boxes. phoenix is a victim, dahlia is a perpetrator--ignore that dahlia was a neglected child who turned to crime at 14, clearly in need of support and intervention but simply unlucky to have no adults in her life to help. at the end of the day, she is a victim too, and her being a victim does not justify the lives she ruined and the people she hurt and traumatized, but it is a hard truth to acknowledge that evildoers are not monsters from birth but shaped by their circumstance. people do not want to acknowledge that, because then they have to acknowledge that they, too, can become abusive and cruel. they want to believe they are safe from it.

while ace attorney does not take a stance in favour of rehabilitative justice in a literal sense, it certainly makes you fucking root for it by presenting murderers and criminals who are, more often than not wholly sympathetic.

manfred von karma is, arguably, not meant to be sympathetic. but i am very charmed by AA's tendency to make me think harder about these perps. and so i think harder about mvk. because that is what the story has told me to do. in running that thought experiment, i found that i like it a lot more when he is, on the surface, a good person to those he considers worthy of his love. he is a rat bastard, a fucking brat, an entitled control-freak, and a little bit of a bitch... but, like, so am i, and those traits make him annoying, not abusive. if he was 40 years younger and conventionally attractive, the fandom girlies would fucking love him, but he's old and disabled so he doesn't get that privilege.

he sucks and he's a murderer. i just don't think he hurts his kids. when people get furious with me for this, they often say that i have dubious evidence. which is true, it's just my personal interpretation, backed up by some subtext in the games. same as theirs. they do not like when i tell them this, and when i ask, 'okay, where's your evidence, then?' they just kinda say 'dude, fucking trust me.' or 'did you play the games???'

i did. we took different things from the games, though. that is okay. why are people so mad? why can't they just understand, that is okay. they don't have to agree with me. they can just... exist elsewhere...?

first, the repeated line was that i said mvk was justified in all he did because he was lead poisoned (i did not say that. it's a joke headcanon i have.) now, the line is that i am apparently declaring the anime canon. i did not say that, just that i enjoyed the takes on canon they proposed and liked to incorporate them where the main canon does not contradict them. people in the fandom do this all the time, for instance a lot of folks put the signal samurai into their gameverse fic because shit's cute and adds a lot to narumitsu. why is that worthy of praise, but my own take worthy of mockery?

every single time someone doesn't like my opinion on this matter, instead of just ignoring it and doing their own thing, they instead... zero in on one point i made, take it out of context, completely misinterpret it in... not even bad faith, but STRANGE faith, and then spread it all across the internet as if it was gospel.

why... do they do that?

if i'm truly wrong, can't you just lay out the ACTUAL argument i made, and strike down its points with evidence of your own?

i've asked before. i get blocked. i get ignored. i get "its just vibes" or "play the game."

okay. i played the game. here's my favourite part:

what's yours?

i've been having some discourse thoughts recently and going back and forth, and I don't really have a final conclusion at the moment so I'm just writing it out to try and make sense of it. I am not intending to get into heated arguments or cause problems, I'm genuinely just trying to question thoughts and beliefs I've been holding to that i picked up from others to be certain whether or not they're solid and I want to continue in that manner because reflection, introspection, and critical thinking are good practices. and posting it because consulting and engaging with others and perspectives outside your own is helpful. so don't mind me trying to sort myself out it's a genuinely earnest attempt to properly reason it through

the crux of it is that I realized it seems hypocritical of me to say I firmly believe in shipping and letting ship, supporting fiction's right to be fucked up and unhealthy, controlling your own experiences, for people to do what they want with fiction because fiction is not reality and should be a safe space where you can explore fucked up things, agree that policing what you can and can't do with fiction is a dangerously slippery slope, and then also turn around and condemn wylinh/wylinh shippers

I don't like the ship myself, I've made numerous posts discussing why I find it harmful--the main thing being its an adult x minor ship (Alden and Della's relationship is completely different, do not bring it up here as a counterargument. you can ask me to explain further if you don't understand). But people are allowed to engage with things that would be harmful or predatory or questionable or etc. in fiction; it's fake. People have said it before, but writing about murder doesn't mean you want to commit murder and all that.

So then since its okay to ship fucked up things because this is fiction, the problem with wylinh seems to become that people ship it in the same manner they do other ships without adult/minor dynamics, not with the understanding that it's got questionable elements. That it's okay to ship fucked up things but you have to do it a certain way that I think is acceptable (you have to know its not really healthy irl), and I don't think that's a mindset I want to have? That people's shipping needs to meet a standard I set? Even if I don't like it? I'm not arbitrator I don't get to decide those kinds of things for others, I just get to decide for me

And another big argument that's been made (including by me) is that children/young teens read these books and find fandom spaces even if they're not supposed to be here, and that that exposure could normalize a harmful age dynamic. Because while Wylie and Linh may be lovely people, they're fictional and it's not reflective of how an age gap like theirs would look irl and children could end up missing red flags of predatory people in real life by thinking of it like idealized fiction. But think of the children rhetoric is one that has been often criticized as cover for more malicious intentions (such as in politics) with the convenient safe fail that if you disagree, you must not care about children.

Part of the critique of that rhetoric is also that the actions being defended don't actually help or protect children. So I'm now wondering, does trying to stop (I can't think of a better word at the moment) wylinh shippers actually achieve that goal of protecting impressionable kids from idolizing an unrealistic relationship, or does it just motivate them to hide it and not trust the people who are, to them, unjustifiably criticizing them?

Wylinh is a widely disliked ship in the fandom, and that's okay, we're all allowed our opinions including negative ones. I just feel as though I'm contradicting myself on some points and want to straighten them out for myself. I don't like Wylinh, I don't ship it, I don't engage with any Wylinh content because of the aforementioned reasons. But my personal dislike shouldn't shape fandom spaces and others' actions, and making sure people are shipping things the "right" way feels like a much more harmful slope.

And if the best course of action to align with that is to just focus on myself, not engage with what I don't like, and politely share my thoughts without forcing them on others or trying to control their actions when the opportunity arises (though maybe this isn't the best course of action, there may be others), that makes this whole post feel redundant because that's...already what I'm doing. I suppose this is just to change my internal perspective not my outward actions? My intentions?

There's no real final conclusion to this, it's just me going "hmm, I've been criticizing wylinh shippers for shipping what I think is a harmful ship, but I also believe in shipping and let ship and allowing fiction to explore harmful things and not controlling others. can these co-exist or do I have to rethink something?"

and I think the answer is I have to rethink something? and that something is criticizing people for shipping wylinh. i still maintain my critiques and dislikes of the ship, but that's a separate thing. i find it more important to maintain and respect individuals right to engage with fiction of all sorts how they want to, without control from others

there's probably a million ways to negatively misinterpret things I've said, so just know all of this is genuine reflection made in good faith. i am earnestly trying to figure it out, and if anyone has input or opinions or perspectives they'd like to share you're welcome to, provided its also in good faith.

alright cool that's all, please do not be mean to me as I try to be a better person because I know its a discourse heavy topic :)

Reality check time: Is it okay, given that I'm Christian (basically, weirdly--I don't think gods exist but I think the religious traditions I grew up with are personally useful to me so I follow most of them), to feel REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE when posts go around Jumblr that are all about how ex-Christian atheists only exist because of a particular feature of Christian-dominated culture? Because I just read a post that said "you're all supercessionists" and I feel so uneasy.

I can only speak for myself and my own becoming an atheist (and later deciding religious practice is good for me even though I'm pretty sure God is something we made up, and therefore it's random and unimportant which one anyone worships if at all.)

But for me, it wasn't so much "I don't like this religion because it tells me not to be gay and kinky. Therefore I dislike all religion."

It was

"I'm already not sure there's a god, and therefore uneasy anyway, but WHY does god tell me not to be gay and kinky?"

"Tradition."

"What's the value of tradition?"

"...what kind of a question is that?"

"Oh, I'm doing that neurodivergent thing where you say a concept-word and I don't understand it and we can't even talk because you assume I do. 'Tradition' is weird meaningless neurotypical for 'There is a script. I don't care how it got here. It is my script.'"

"Yes?"

"Then fuck 'tradition.' Scripts should not be arbitrary."

"Whoa, you're scary and spiteful.... Say, what do you think of other religions?"

"Do they use 'tradition?'"

"That's pretty much all they are, if you don't think gods are real."

"Then I do not like them."

While it's true that for some reason, queer Jews don't seem to do the "Why is this rule here?" "Tradition." "Then tradition is bad." thing, I... feel like the queer Jews who DO find value in tradition come up with all these weird explanations for what the rest of us are doing to avoid "I'm neurodivergent, and no one explained what 'a tradition' is in a way that isn't hurtful. So I decided 'traditions' are bad, unless people can prove they are useful. Like having three meals a day--it's not necessary, but it works well for many humans, so it ended up just worthwhile to tell all the humans to do things that way, so now you know what it means that 'she's at lunch.'"

If I didn't know for a fact that MANY of the people saying this stuff on Jumblr are themselves autistic, I'd say it's that thing where neurotypical people keep using a word, and they think you must understand that word because you've heard it in context enough times that you can use it, but really you don't know what people are actually getting at and you're pantomiming, and the people Discoursing don't know that and are just hostile to neurodivergence and coming up with all sorts of weird "why they're like that" that are anything but "they don't know what this means."

I returned to religious practice, but even that's in line with this--I discovered in a tough time in my life that religious messaging about being loved unconditionally helped me to feel better when other things didn't, so I decided I wanted to hear it more often. It also helped to remind me to be kind and helpful to other humans.

Thus, for me, Christianity turned out to be a useful tradition. I didn't get the Unconditional Love from real people I knew, so I made up a guy and decided he feels that way. About me and also about other people who are struggling who I want to help but can't unconditionally love because, uh, I have a personality.

I'm less judgy of other religions now because even if they don't sound like useful traditions to ME, I can see why they'd be useful to others maybe. (I personally don't get the idea of religious law; life has enough rules without me taking on more of them, especially if some of them are "don't have gay sex" or "ritually cleanse yourself after gay sex as it makes you unclean." I get that other people can ignore that one, but if I agree to a set of rules I agree to all of them, and I want to have gay sex. The only cleansing I want to do is pee afterward. But I gather this doesn't work the same way for a lot of people who happily follow religious law, so.)

But I do not think I'm any closer to understanding why some people accept traditions without having personal reasons to do so. I just think that's part of my neurodivergence, honestly, and that many if not most "Reddit atheists" are neurodivergent in a similar way, which is why until I started noticing them being dicks and going redpill (just another tradition! Why are you gendertrads?!) I felt I'd found My People.

And I certainly don't think I'm secretly supersessionist. I think a religious tradition that puts less stress on Laws and Proper Tradition Following is better for ME, because of MY BRAIN (and also probably just that I grew up with it so I get it.)

It's not superior to any other piece of fiction with a big fandom that people use to improve their lives (by which I mean "any other religion").