Would you rather they add Hera to Hades II or they add Aglaia and your job is to get her and Hephaestus together while helping Aphrodite and Hephaestus with their divorce?

Aglaea: I make out with Hephaestus? He's fine. I kiss him on the nose? He's a mess. Aglaea: I slap his ass? Doesn't care. But if I hold his hand and kiss his knuckles? He's inconsolable. Aglaea: Why does simple affection break him? I do not know.

Hephaestus and his wife Kharis/Aglaea.

Hephaestus *smoking*: I wanna be someone's first choice. Aglaea: Yeah... You are. Hephaestus: No, no. I know what your saying. I'm not her first choice. Aglaea: But your someone's first choice.

Αι μεν ηδοναί θνηταί αι δε αρεταί αθάνατοι.

Periander of Corinth

Pleasures are mortal while the virtues are immortal.*

In Greek mythology, the Three Graces were more commonly known as the Charites, although today, the Roman name, the Graces, is more often used. The Charites, or Graces, were three sisters, minor goddesses, and daughters of Zeus and the Oceanid Eurynome.

Hesiod, in the Theogony, named the Three Graces as, Aglaea, Thalia and Euphrosyne. The role of these goddess in Greek mythology was to spread goodwill, pleasure and mirth; and were also goddesses of song and dance, a role that would overlap with that of the Muses.

Hephaestus: I just wanted to tell you I have a massive crush on you Aglaea: Oh! So do-...*she notices Dionysus standing behing Hephaestus* who's the other guy? Hephaestus: I brought him for moral support Aglaea, smiling: are you serious? Dionysus, patting Hephaestus back: Im here for you man, do your thing.

‘aglaea’ by hian tjen 2023

If I had a nickel for every time someone simped for Hephaestus, I'd have three nickels, which isn't a lot but I guess that means this is now a pattern. Also, I misread Aglaea as algae and was honestly just ready to accept that was her name.

Charis: "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven~"

Hephaestus: "yea actually it hurt a lot!"

Charis: (Abort! Abort! This was not part of the plan!)

In Hades I it’s your job to get people back together, in Hades II it’s your job to help Hephaestus and Aphrodite go through with the divorce.

Oh my god that would be so funny, imagine if it’s also helping Zeus and Hera divorce? Or it’s bringing Hephaestus and Aglaia together? Or help Hera and Pasithea/Angelos reconcile? That would be interesting.

Hephaestus: Oh, fuck. I cut my finger. Aglaea: Here, let me kiss it better. Hephaestus, blushing furiously: Oh- uh- okay [later] Hephaestus: Ares, I need you to punch me in the mouth. Ares, already winding up: ok!

Hephaestus: I'm trash.

Aglaea: As someone who's environmentally conscious, it's my duty to pick you up. Does 7 work for you?

Hephaestus:

Hephaestus: You smooth motherfucker.

Hephaestus: And yes it does.

Aglaea: I love you. Hephaestus: I mean, you love everyone and everyone loves you. Aglaea: I want to be with you. Hephaestus: I enjoy your companion too. But you should also take care of your other fields. Aglaea: Hephaestus, son of Hera and god of the smith. I want to marry you, build a family, and live with you for the rest of our eternal lives. Hephaestus: ... Very poetic. You're getting better at your literature.

Aglaia: I love you a lot. Hephaestus: I love you more. Aglaia: No Hephaestus: You're shorter than me so your love capacity isn't as strong as mine so it's physically impossible for you to love me more.

Hephaestus: You’re the love of my life and my best friend, I would do anything for you.

Aglaea: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule.

Hephaestus: Absolutely not.