#THEY WANTED NO PICKLES!!!!!! *KILLS EVERYONE*
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THEY ASKED FOR NO PICKLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#my art#madness combat#hank j. wimbleton#2bdamned#mc hank#mc 2bdamned#mc deimos#mc sanford#madness combat sanford#madness combat deimos#Sanford and Deimos#hehe the sillies#would this maybe be polycombat in a way?#yeah hank stand up for your boyfriends#THEY WANTED NO PICKLES!!!!!! *KILLS EVERYONE*
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Rumor Has It
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Synopsis: chaos ensues when Peter suspects you may be pregnant
Masterlist
“Do we have any salt and vinegar chips?” You asked as you rummaged through the kitchen pantry.
“No, because those are disgusting.” Rhodey replied without looking up from his newspaper.
“Actually, they’re delicious.” You insisted. “Clearly someone agrees because they’re all gone. I need something bitter. Do we have any pickles?”
“I think we have some left over from Cap’s birthday blowout. I’ll help you look.” Peter got up from his seat at the kitchen table and went over to help you look.
“I’ll look too. I need some cheese balls.” Sam patted his stomach and went over to the pantry. What he found inside was a nearly empty bag of cheese balls waiting for him. Sam slowly held up the bag to everyone sitting at the kitchen table so that they could see it.
“Who ate all the balls?” He said calmly.
“It wasn’t me.” You answered.
“Not me. I don’t eat that crap.” Bucky scoffed.
“What do you call that then?” Tony asked and pointed to the pop tart in Buckys hand.
“Well it’s strawberry flavored, isn’t it? That’s a fruit.” Bucky replied.
“You’re a fruit.” Tony mumbled.
“Come on. Fess up.” Sam urged. “Who finished all the balls?”
“Not me.” Peter answered while everyone else stayed silent.
“Well it was fookin’ one of yus.” Sam snapped and threw the bag to the ground.
“Don’t look at me.” Tony held up his hands in defense. “I haven’t eaten cheeseballs since the 80s. That was also the last time I tried crack. Unrelated.”
“Someone needs to tell me who ate all the balls or there’s about to be an Avengers level threat in this kitchen.” Sam warned.
“I did it. I ate all the balls.” Carol confessed and stood up from the table.
“And just put back an empty bag? Don’t you think the rest of us would’ve liked some balls?” Sam asked as he slowly walked towards her.
“Maybe.” She shrugged. “Or maybe I didn’t care.”
“Maybe you should care. I was looking forward all week to those nice, crunchy balls.”
“We don’t always get what we want.” Carol replied and narrowed her eyes.
“Why did we all decide to drop “cheese” and just say balls?” Peter raised his hand to ask.
“If you finished the balls, you should have replaced them with more balls.” Sam told her.
“I’ve been busy.” Carol shrugged him off.
“Doing what?” Sam scoffed. “Eating all the snacks and not replacing them?”
“Why’d you ask if you already knew?” Carol asked sarcastically, making Sam grow madder.
“I’ll kill you.”
“I’ll kill you harder.” Carol warned back.
“Guys. No fighting in the kitchen.” Tony quipped. “It makes the fruit go bad faster.”
“He’s right. The bad vibes make the banana go brown instantly.” You insisted. Carol looked down at the empty bag of cheese balls and sighed.
“I’m sorry I ate all the balls.” She said sincerely. “I’m on my period right now and I honestly don’t even remember doing it.”
“Fine. You get off the hook this time. But only because I don’t understand how periods work.” Sam said with the same sincerity.
“I can go get some more balls now at the store.” Carol offered. “I need ibuprofen anyway. My cramps are killing me.”
“Hey, sparkles, can you get me some cough stuff while you’re there? My throat is acting up.” Tony said and rubbed his sore throat.
“Why are you always sick?” Sam asked him.
“Your immune system gets weaker as you get older. This cold could very well be his last.” Peter pointed out.
“Thanks.” Tony replied sarcastically through a cough. Carol left for the store and you looked down at the cheese ball bag in confusion.
“What’s today?” You asked Peter.
“The 25th.” He replied. “Don’t ask me what day of the week though. I’ve never known.”
“Hm.” You frowned and put your hand on your stomach.
“What’s wrong?”
“My period was supposed to come on the 10th. I wonder why it’s so late.” You shrugged.
“Weird.” Peter shrugged as well and didn’t think anything of it.
“I guess these will have to do. As entertaining as this was, I’ll be in my room.” You said as you grabbed a bag of tortilla chips, kissed Peters cheek, and left the kitchen. Sam turned to Peter with an amused look on his face, making Peter frown in confusion.
“Uh oh.” Sam chuckled.
“What oh?” Peter asked.
“Nothing. Just don’t ask me to babysit.”
“Babysit who?”
“Your kid.” Sam said simply.
“What kid?”
“The one your girlfriend is pregnant with.” Sam said like it was obvious.
“What?” Peter laughed. “She’s not pregnant.”
“Did we just see the same thing? Her periods late and had weird food cravings? She’s definitely pregnant.” Sam insisted.
“He’s right. Only a pregnant person would willingly eat salt and vinegar chips.” Rhodey said from the table.
“You guys don’t know what you’re talking about. There’s no way she’s pregnant.” Peter laughed it off but felt his stomach start to turn with anxiety.
“Oh. My bad. I didn’t realize there was no way.” Sam snorted and looked Peter up and down. It took Peter a minute to realize what Sam was implying and he quickly shut that down.
“Now hold on a minute. Best believe I’m in my baby’s room every night leaving her adequately satisfied. I’m saying there’s no way she could be pregnant because we use protection. And because I have lighting quick reflexes.”
Tony threw a a buttered bagel at Peter from the kitchen table and it stuck to his chest. Peter looked down at the bagel before looking at Tony in shock.
“Why would you do that?” Peter asked.
“The question you should be asking is didn’t your tingle tell you I was gonna do that? Maybe your reflexes aren’t as quick as you thought.” Tony shrugged and went back to his breakfast. Peter peeled the bagel off and tossed it in the trash before looking at Sam.
“Do you really think she’s pregnant?” He whispered.
“I don’t know. Do you?” Sam asked.
“I don’t know. Do you?” Peter asked back.
“Why don’t you just ask her?” Sam suggested.
“Yeah. That’s a really good idea. Let me ask my girlfriend if she’s pregnant. That definitely won’t effect her self esteem in any way or make her mad at me at all.”
“You’re right.” Sam agreed. “You have to sleuth.”
“Or I could just wait until she feels ready to share the news.” Peter pointed out.
“No.” Sam shook his head. “You gotta go sleuth.”
And so, Peter left the kitchen to sleuth. He went to your room and pushed your door open to find you.
“Hey, honey bee.” Peter greeted you as he walked into your room. You were standing in front of your floor length mirror with your shirt pulled up a little.
“Do you think I’ve gained weight?” You asked as you examined your reflection.
“Uh….” Peter looked behind him for help getting out of this question. He ended up turning in a full circle twice and got dizzy.
“Peter?” You asked and rolled your shirt down.
“Ummmmm.” He stalled and pretended to take sudden interest in the things on your dresser. He knew girls had a record of asking things and wanting certain answers and he was almost positive that this was one of those questions. Your question had also watered the seed that Sam had just planted in Peters head about you possibly being pregnant. Peter knew he needed to avoid answering this question before you got suspicious that he might know something.
“Did you say something?” He asked you.
“I asked you a question.” You laughed at his obvious attempt at avoiding the question.
“You did? I must’ve miss that.” He played dumb.
“Just be honest with me. Do you think I’ve gained weight?” You repeated.
“I don’t understand the question, sorry.”
“It’s a simple yes or no question.”
“I’m confused. Are you asking me?” Peter forced a confused laugh and pointed to himself.
“Yes, you. You’re the only one in here. Do you think I’ve gained weight? Be honest.” You asked and looked back at your mirror again to see your side profile.
“In what regard?”
“Oh my God.” You laughed. “Just answer the question. I’m not gonna be mad. It’s not the end of the world to gain weight. I just want to know if you’ve noticed it.”
“I’ve never noticed anything. Ever.” Peter replied.
“Right. Thank you.” You chuckled and walked over to him to wrap your arms around his neck. He kissed you hello and momentarily forgot about what Sam had suggested.
“Why do you ask?” He asked you.
“I don’t know. I was just getting dressed and I realized I used to put this belt on this hole but today I put it on the hole after that.” You shrugged and showed him your belt.
“Maybe it shrunk.”
“Maybe. Or maybe I grew.” You shrugged.
“You look beautiful either way.” Peter said sincerely. “Whether you got bigger or not. You’re still the only girl I want to holla at.”
“I think so too. Thanks.” You smiled warmly at him and rested your head on his shoulder to hug him. Peter wrapped you in his arms and sighed happily and you gently rocked back and forth.
“You’re welcome.” He answered. For a second, he wasn’t panicking about the possibility of a baby. Instead, he felt excited to start a family with the person he loved most.
Later in the afternoon, you and Peter strolled into the kitchen to get some snacks. Tony and Sam were making lunch while Carol restocked the snack cabinet.
“Oh, I almost forgot. Here’s your cough syrup.” Carol said and gave the cough medicine to Tony.
“Thanks. My throat is killing me.” Tony sighed and cracked open the bottle.
“Here. We have measuring cups in the-“ You started to say as Tony took a long swig of the syrup.
“Or chug it. Okay.” You nodded while Peter stifled a laugh.
“Ugh. They can’t figure out how to make this taste any better?” Tony grimaced and wiped his mouth.
“I’ll make you some tea to wash it down.” You offered and filled the kettle with water.
“Thanks, kid.” Tony smiled. “I love when my annual man flu lines up with when you’re home from school. You’re so good at taking care of people.”
“Thanks for saying that. I don’t know what it is but I really like taking care of people when they’re sick. It makes me feel like a mom.” You said as you poured the hot water over a tea bag. Peter started choking on the water he was drinking while Sam gulped.
“You’re gonna be such a good mom.” Carol told you. “You’re so giving.”
“Aw, thank you. I hope so.” You smiled and patted your stomach twice. Peter and Sam exchanged a look with equal panic on their faces. Sam grabbed Peters arms and pulled him aside.
“Did she just pat her stomach?” Sam whispered.
“No way. This can’t be happening. You can’t be right. You’re never right!” Peter whispered back as he started to panic.
“Maybe this time, I was!” Sam whispered harshly.
“She can’t be pregnant. There’s no way. She would’ve told me.”
“She is telling you.” Sam insisted. “She’s dropping hints like crazy.”
“Oh my God. Why’d you have to put this idea in my head? I’m freaking out, man.”
“So am I. You think I want a spider baby crawling up the walls and shit like it’s the exorcist?”
“Technically the exorcist is the guy who gets rid of the demon. He doesn’t crawl up the walls. The possessed person does that. Well, I guess depending on the demon.”
“Jesus Christ. This kid is about to be so god damn annoying.” Sam sighed.
“You know what? No. She’s not pregnant.” Peter decided and walked away.
“Are you sure about that?” Sam called after him as he went back into the kitchen. When Peter got there, you were mixing honey into Tony’s tea while helping him with something on his phone. Peter watched you patiently teaching Tony and smiled to himself. He once again felt that maybe it would be okay if Sam was right. If you were pregnant, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. It was unexpected and jarring, but not impossible for Peter to handle as long as he had you.
The pregnancy rumor that existed between only Peter and Sam died down for the next few days. It wasn’t until a rainy Sunday that Peter thought about it again. You were watching a movie in the living room with some of the team when Natasha came in.
“Carol and I were gonna go train. You wanna join?” Natasha asked you.
“I would but my lower back is killing me. I think I slept weird.” You said and cracked your neck. Peter felt his face heat up when you said this, and Sam caught it too.
“Did you hear that? Her back hurts. Because of the baby!” Sam whispered to Peter.
“That’s not why. Didn’t you hear her? She said she slept weird.” Peter whispered back.
“Duh, she slept weird because of the baby!” Sam whispered again. Peter waved him off but couldn’t help but wonder if he was right.
“I could crack it for you.” Natasha offered.
“Could you? Thank.” You got off the couch and went over to Natasha. She wrapped her strong arms around you and was about to squeeze when Peter jumped off the couch.
“Not so fast.” He said and pulled you away from Natasha.
“What’s the matter?” You wondered. Peter was dumbstruck for a second when he realized he couldn’t say he didn’t want Natasha to crack your back incase her giant muscles squished the little baby in your tummy.
“I just don’t think it’s safe to be cracking her back if you don’t know what you’re doing. You could hurt someone.” Peter tried to explain but didn’t sound convincing.
“I’m not gonna hurt her. I’ve cracked her back plenty of times.” Natasha insisted and pulled you back towards her.
“Okay. Just be careful. Baby on board.” He mumbled the last part quickly.
“What was that?” You asked him.
“Nothing. What did you say?” Peter asked you to throw you off.
“I didn’t say anything. Weirdo.” You laughed at his odd behavior and let Natasha crack your back. Peter held his breath until you were safely out of her arms.
“Oh thank God.” He sighed. “We survived that. Cool.”
“Did you not think we would?” You laughed in confusion.
“I don’t know how to answer that question.” Peter answered honestly.
“You are being so odd lately. More than usual, you know that?” You chuckled as you pulled him back towards the couch.
“That’s just my boyish charm.” Peter laughed weakly and settled back onto the couch. He pulled you into his side and told himself that your back could be hurting for any number of reasons and didn’t necessarily mean you were pregnant. You watched the movie for a little bit until Peter felt you shift and wince a little.
“Are you okay?” He asked you.
“Yeah. My boobs are just sore.” You said and adjusted your bra uncomfortably.
“Why? Did you sprain them?”
“Um, no.” You chuckled. “I don’t even think you can sprain them. I must be PMSing.”
“Oh, thank God.” Peter said too enthusiastically. “Your period came?”
“No. Why do you seem so excited about it?” You furrowed your eyebrows and looked at him. Peter gulped and avoided eye contact with you.
“Excited? I’m not excited. Your men’s trail cycle doesn’t evoke any emotions within me. But if you don’t mind me asking, how are you PMSing without the P?”
“I’m pretty sure the P stands for “pre”. But you still get the symptoms sometimes even if you’re not on your period.”
“Interesting, interesting. Follow up question, are you usually this off kilter?”
“You mean irregular?” You laughed. “No. I haven’t been late in years.”
“Hm. Weird.” Peter forced a laugh and tried to focus on the movie while his mind raced.
“You’re telling me. My boobs hurt like a bitch.” You whined and pulled the blanket up to your chin.
“Ahem, I could help with that, m’lady.” Peter smirked and held up both his hands. You looked at him for a long time with a disgusted expression before turning back to the movie.
“I want pretzels.” You said.
“Coming right up.” Peter jumped off the couch and ran to the kitchen. Sam saw him leave and got up to go after him.
“How’s it going?” He asked Peter once they were alone in the kitchen.
“I don’t know.” Peter sighed. “She hasn’t told me anything yet.”
“Is she showing any other signs?”
“She said she thinks she gained weight but I can’t really tell. I don’t think about that stuff. I just see her and I’m like “oh my god it’s a girl”. Have you noticed anything else?”
“I mean, I wasn’t gonna say anything, but I saw her rip the wrong banana from the bunch and broke down crying.” Sam admitted.
“Oh no. Is craving bananas a symptom of pregnancy?”
“No, idiot. Mood swings are. For your future child’s sake, I really hope she isn’t actually pregnant. No one deserves this dumb of a father.”
“I know.” Peter whined. “What do I do? I’m freaking out.”
“I’m sure she’ll tell you soon. And if she doesn’t, you’ll find out anyway. It’s kinda hard to hide a pregnancy after a few months. Just relax, man.”
“Okay. You’re right.” Peter agreed. “I’m not gonna freak out until I know there’s something to worry about. Now excuse me while I pee out this apple juice.”
Peter walked away from Sam and went into the bathroom. After peeing, he blew his nose and went to throw it out when he saw something strange in the trash. He frowned and pulled it out before feeling all the color drain from his face.
“Oh no.” He said gravely. In his hand was a pregnancy test with two red lines.
“Positive? What? Are you sure?” Peter whispered harshly and shook the test. The lines stayed the same and Peter felt his stomach drop. All those moments of thinking everything would be okay seemed so far away now. Now that it was real and not just an idea, Peter felt overwhelmed. You were really pregnant and he really didn’t know what to do. He felt his heart start to race and he fell against the door with the test in his hand. You heard Peter thud against the door and went to go investigate.
“Peter? Are you okay in there?” You asked as you knocked against the door.
“Go away! I’m pooping!” Peter screamed as he ran the test under hot water to try to change the answer.
“Why is that always your response?” You sighed and walked away. Peter waited until you were gone before sneaking out of the bathroom. He went to go find Sam and yanked him into another room.
“Dude. It’s true. She’s pregnant.” Peter said and handed Sam the test.
“Oh shit. Are you sure?” Sam asked and shook the test.
“I already tried that. It’s true. She’s pregnant.” Peters mouth went dry as he said it out loud. It felt even more real now and he didn’t know how to handle it.
“Dude. This is serious. Aren’t you guys in like middle school?”
“We’re both in college. But still. I’m not ready to be a dad. I can’t even take care of myself. Look at this rash.” Peter whined and lifted his shirt to show Sam the red ring around his armpit.
“Oh my God. What the hell is that?” Sam grimaced and raised his hands to protect himself from Peters rash.
“A rash. Like I said.” Peter said flatly. “I think I’m allergic to my deodorant.”
“So use a different one.”
“But I like how this one smells. It’s called Flannel, see?” Peter said and got closer to Sam with his arm raised.
“Get your armpitt out of my face before I make it where you can’t have anymore kids.” Sam warned and Peter put his shirt down.
“What am I supposed to do?” He whined. “Mr. Stark is gonna kill me. And then May is gonna kill me. And then Y/n’s parents. I’m gonna die three times. Three times!”
“Yeah. No, I agree. You’re definitely fucked.” Sam agreed.
“What? That’s not helping!”
“I’m sorry dude, but how am I supposed to help you in this situation?”
“I don’t know. Tell me it’s all gonna be okay?”
“Is it? You’re not out of college yet and neither is she. Neither of you have jobs that can support a child. And it’s not like you live together either. Where would the baby even stay? Your crappy apartment? Or here at this tower full of nuclear weapons and glass windows that aren’t baby proof?”
“I didn’t even think of those things.” Peter realized and started to panic all over again.
“Clearly you don’t think at all. How did this even happen?”
“From sex.” Peter whispered and covered his mouth.
“I know that.” Sam rolled his eyes. “But don’t you guys use protection?”
“Of course. Always. Wrap it before you tap it. On god.”
“Well is she on the pill?”
“What pill?”
“You know. The pill.”
“Tylenol?” Peter asked.
“Oh my God. This poor baby.” Sam groaned and rubbed his eyes.
“What am I gonna do Sam? I’m not ready to be a father. I only had one until I was 9. What if the kid turns ten? I don’t have any examples of being a father past age 9. What am I gonna do?” Peter whined and shook Sam by the shoulders.
“She could get an abortion?” Sam suggested.
“Maybe but that’s not up to me. If she wants to keep this baby, we’re keeping the baby.”
“Maybe it won’t be so bad. Have you ever babysat?”
“Just Ned’s tomagotchi. And it died. Like, immediately.”
“Well lucky for you, Y/n is gonna make a great mom. You’ve seen how caring she is. She takes care of all of us when we get sick. And she gets weirdly excited to do it too. If you so much as sneeze around her she runs to get you a thermometer and a blanket. And she knows all the passwords for streaming services.”
“You’re right. She’s got this. I can learn from her.” Peter said and started to calm down.
“Are you gonna tell her you know?”
“No. She deserves to tell me in her own way on her own time.” Peter decided.
“I think that’s smart. In the meantime, you should probably hit the books. There seems to be a lot you don’t know.”
“You’re right.” Peter realized. “I need to know what to expect when I’m expecting.”
“Can I be honest?” Sam asked.
“Sure.”
“I kinda thought that between the two of you, you’d be the one to carry the baby. Not her.” Sam told him.
“No, I get that.” Peter nodded in agreement.
That night, Peter opened his laptop and started to research everything he could on pregnancy.
“I’m gonna the father the shit out of this kid.” He whispered to himself before diving into his research. By the time the sun came up, his eyes were red and glazed over. His hands were cramping from all the typing and his back was stiff beyond repair. He had spent the night reading every article he could find and took extensive notes. He shut his laptop when he heard birds outside and padded out of his room. When he walked into the kitchen, he saw you about to take a bite of a bagel with lox.
“No!” Peter screamed and shot a web at your bagel. He yanked it away from you and threw it at the cabinet, where it stuck. Everyone turned to look at Peter and he felt his face heat up.
“What the hell was that?” You laughed in surprise.
“You can’t be eating that in your condition.” Peter blurted.
“What condition is that?” You asked and Peter realized he had said too much.
“Um, dating a boy who thinks fish is gross?” He smiled weakly.
“It’s just lox. Try it. I think you’ll like it.” You said and started to make another bagel. He realized that if he ate the rest of the lox, you couldn’t eat any. He had read in his research that uncooked fish was not safe for pregnant women to eat but it seemed like you didn’t know that yet. Keeping it away from you without telling you what he knew was his best bet.
“Okay. Yeah.” Peter reluctantly agreed and sat next to you at the table. You handed him your bagel with the fish on top and he gagged a little. Peter the opened his mouth and shoved the entire bagel inside. He chewed it slowly and gagged every so often.
“You ate the whole thing.” You said in disbelief over what you had just witnessed.
“Uh huh.” Peter said with a full mouth.
“Did you like it?” You laughed and wiped some cream cheese off his mouth.
“Yeah. Yummy.” Peter said weakly. He turned his head a little and gagged loud enough for you to hear.
“Peter, if you don’t like it, don’t eat it.”
“I love it.” He lied and kept chewing. He slowly swallowed the massive bite and made a face as it went down.
“Do you want to throw up?” You asked him.
“Yes please.” He nodded. You brought Peter to the bathroom and held his messy hair back as he threw up into the toilet. Once it was all out, he rested against the wall. He caught sight of the garbage can, the very one ye had found your pregnancy test in.
“Soon, this will be me helping you throw up.” He said.
“What?”
“What?” Peter said quickly when he realized what he had said.
“Are you feeling okay?” You laughed and checked his forehead.
“Are you?” He genuinely asked, wanting to know if you were experiencing morning sickness yet.
“Yeah. Why do you ask?”
“No reason.” Peter lied. You found his behavior strange but decided not to question it further. You knew Peter well enough to know that this was just how he behaved sometimes. You brought him back to the kitchen and made him some tea for his tummy as Peter watch d carefully from his seat. He felt himself relax for the first time since finding the test. Now that he had some some research and remembered how good you were at taking care of people, he felt more confident in your combined skills as parents.
That feeling was confidence was shaken later that day when Peter went into your room to find you. He pushed open your bathroom door and found you sectioning your hair into parts with the faucet running. Beside the sink was your hair straightener. Peter gasped dramatically and yanked the plug out of the wall before shutting off the water.
“Are you crazy? What the are you doing?” He asked as he took the straighter out of your hands.
“Doing my hair? Is that okay?” You laughed in confusion and reached for the straitened.
“You can’t be using this when the waters running. What if you drop it into the sink and get electrocuted?” Peter said as he held the straightener up.
“I’m not sure it works like that. I think it the sink would have to be full of water.”
“Oh. Well I don’t know how hair straighteners work, okay? I’m not God.”
“Peter, you’re being ridiculous. More than usual. Let me straighten my hair. I have to go out tonight.” You whined and took the straitener from him.
“Go out where?”
“It’s Kate’s birthday. We’re gonna go to karaoke and then go to a bar.” You explained as your ran a section of hair through your straightener.
“A bar?!” Peter nearly screamed.
“Yes, oh my God.” You laughed at his outburst. “What’s with you today?”
“What’s with me? What’s with you? You know you’re not supposed to drink when you’re…” Peter trailed off and you looked at him in confusion.
“When I’m what?”
“When you’re on medication.” He said quickly. “Obviously that’s what I was going to say. I saw you take Tylenol before. You’re not supposed to mix alcohol and medicine.”
“That was just for my back pain. I think I’ll be okay.”
“Please don’t go out tonight.” Peter whined and wrapped his arms around you. You stopped doing your hair and turned around in his arms to face him.
“Why not?” You wondered.
“Because…” Peter trailed off as he desperately tried to think of something. He only knew one thing that would be sure to get you to stay.
“Because I’m not feeling so good.” He lied and faked a cough.
“Oh no. You’re sick?” You gasped and felt his forehead.
“Yeah. So sick. Tony must’ve given me whatever he has. I feel horrible.” Peter whined and clutched his stomach.
“But Tony’s throat was bothering him. Does your stomach too?” You asked when you saw what Peter was doing. Peter realized he was faking the wrong illness and nodded.
“Oh yeah. My throat and my stomach hurts. And I think I’m getting a fever too. And my toe fell off.” He laid it on thick to get you to stay.
“Aw. Poor baby.” You pouted and pulled him into your arms.
“Baby?” Peter whispered in fear.
“I’ll take care of you, okay? I’ll tell Kate I can’t make it.” You smiled sweetly as you cupped his face. Peter felt bad for lying to you but he couldn’t let you go out drinking if you were pregnant.
“Thanks, honey bee. You’re the best.” He smiled back. You took his hand and brought him to his room to tuck him into bed. Peter felt guilty all over again when you went to go make him some soup. He was feeling perfectly fine so your efforts were for nothing. You came back and fed him the soup, making him feel even worse about lying.
“I feel like Peeta in the cave.” Peter joked as you held the spook to his lips.
“Ugh, dirty Peeta in the cave is so hot. I would’ve won the games with the things I’d do to that man on camera. I’ll tell you that.”
“Wait, what?” Peter sat up and looked at you.
“How about some tea?” You smiled sweetly as you changed the subject.
“Can we circle back to what you just said about-“
“I’ll go make some.” You cut him off as you left his room. You came back soon with a hot mug of tea for Peter. He was already sweating under the blankets you tucked him into and the hot soup, so tea was the last thing he wanted. But he felt that that’s what he deserved for lying to you.
“Oh, no. You’re so sweaty. You must be getting a fever.” You frowned once Peter had finished his tea.
“Oh no. Must be.” Peter laughed weakly and discreetly fanned his face.
“I know what will make you feel better.” You said and climbed into Peters lap. You started to kiss his neck and he went into high alert mode.
“What are you doing?” He asked and gently moved you back.
“Kissing you?”
“With a suggestive undertone.” He replied, sounding accusatory.
“Is that a problem?” You laughed and bent down to kiss his neck again. He pulled you off and looked at you in disbelief.
“You want to have sex? The very thing that caused this?”
“Huh? Caused what?” You asked.
“The pregnancy.” He said like it was obvious. Peter slapped his hand over his mouth as you tilted your head in confusion.
“Wait, what? What pregnancy?”
“Your pregnancy.”
“My pregnancy?” You asked as you sat back on your knees. Peter sat up as well and pushed the blankets off himself.
“I’m sorry. But I know.” Peter admitted with a sigh.
“Know what?” You laughed in confusion.
“You don’t have to pretend anymore, honey bee. I already know about the pregnancy.” Peter said as he took your hands.
“Wait, I’m confused. Who’s pregnant?” You asked him.
“You are.” He said simply.
“I’m pregnant?” You asked and pointed to yourself.
“Yes. You’re pregnant.”
“Me?” You asked and looked behind you for who else he might be talking to.
“Yes, you.” He urged and shook your hands.
“Hold on. Who told you I was pregnant?” You laughed at how serious he was.
“You did.” Peter said like it was obvious.
“Me?” You questioned and pointed to yourself again.
“You’re the only one in the room right now.”
“Peter, I never said I was pregnant. I think I would remember saying something like that.”
“That’s because you didn’t say it with words. You’ve just been dropping hints like crazy. The sore back, the eating of salt and vinegar chips-“
“Those are-“
“No they’re not.” He cut you off before you could defend them.
You stared at Peter as you tried to gage if he was being serious or not. He stared back at you as he tried to figure out if you were upset or relieved that he knew.
“Also I found this positive pregnancy test in the trash.” He said as he pulled the test out of his pocket. You took the test from him and looked at it for a long time. Peters heart raced as he waited for your reaction. Finally, you flipped the test over and showed him what it said on the back.
“This is a strep throat test.” You said calmly.
“What?!” Peter shrieked and took the test back. Sure enough, the back said “rapid strep throat test” in raised letters.
“Tony has strep throat. You knew this.”
“This looks exactly like a pregnancy test.” Peter defended as he showed you the test again.
“Peter, this looks nothing like a pregnancy test. Do you know what a pregnancy test looks like?”
“Apparently not.” Peter scoffed. You stared at him for a minute before cracking up laughing.
“You really thought I was pregnant? That’s why you didn’t let me eat fish or straighten my hair? And tried to stop Natasha from cracking my back? Which I still don’t see the correlation, by the way.”
“I didn’t want you or the baby to be in harms way. What if the straighter shocked you and the baby came out like the Flash? What if it just ran right out of your womb? Or what if Natasha squeezed you so hard and the baby popped out like a rocket?”
“You know shocking little about pregnancy.”
“I know. But as nervous as I was, I was also kinda excited.” Peter admitted. “I know you’re the person I’m gonna be with forever. It would be nice to have a little one that was a combination of the both of us.”
“And one day, we will have one.” You assured him. “And hopefully, they’ll inherit my intelligence over yours.”
“I hope so too.” Peter chuckled. You leaned down to kiss him and he felt himself fully relax for the first time in days.
“I hope you know that if we do have a kid one day, you’re carrying it. I’m not getting fat.” You told him once you pulled away.
“I don’t know if that’s medically possibly yet. Not for cis men, anyway.“
“We’ll find a way.” You shrugged. “We can ask Bruce. You can be like a seahorse! Or Cosmo from the Fairly Oddparents.”
“I’d do it for you, honey.”
“I know you would. That’s why I know you’re my forver person too.” You smiled and leaned in to kiss him again. Peter pulled you into his lap and slipped his hand behind your head to deepen the kiss.
“So, now that we know you’re not pregnant…” Peter trailed off and played with the buttons on your shirt. You caught on to what he was suggesting and laughed as you pushed his face away.
“Not a chance.”
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I absolutely love the development of Dethklok.
Nathan “I can’t do apologies” Explosion apologized to the woman and the fans he wronged without thinking about it twice. Nathan “I write only brutal music” Explosion, the man who wrote the song that saved the world. Nathan „no caring rule“ Explosion, who was the most emotional after losing people, and wouldn’t give up on Murderface. Nathan Explosion, the man who transformed from the fist into the hand.
Pickles „y’all are douchebags“ the Drummer, the one who let his bandmates sleep in bed with him because they needed his comfort. Pickles „calling Toki our brother is weird“ the Drummer, taking on a parental role and referring to everyone as his brothers. Pickles „fuck Seth“ the Drummer, making peace (more or less) with him for the sake of his band. Pickles the Drummer, the man with the biggest heart underneath that shell.
Toki „I always hated you Skwisgaar“ Wartooth being the one to save him when he’s unconscious and knowing what he wants to say. Toki „I hate children“ Wartooth age regressing and giving into his inner child, admitting he likes all those cute and fun things. Toki „going nonverbal around my parents“ Wartooth was strong enough to say his final goodbyes to his father (more or less). Toki Wartooth, the guy who showed his strength by becoming softer.
Skwisgaar „Don‘t Touch“ Skwigelf, allowing Toki to hold onto him for comfort and reaching out for his bandmates to comfort them as well. Skwisgaar „Just Kill Yourself Murderface“ being the one who figured out something is wrong with him. Skwisgaar „fuck you Toki“ Skwigelf putting so much effort into saving Toki, and then helping him „becomes goods“ at music again. Skwisgaar Skwigelf, the gentle giant who just struggles to show it.
William „what if I act out for attention“ Murderface, isolating himself from his bandmates to suffer in silence so he doesn’t worry them. William „I don‘t matter for the band“ Murderface finding his role in the band (as well as the bass becoming so much more prominent in the AOTD music). William „Idgaf about anybody“ Murderface dedicating the Song of Salvation to Knubbler. William Murderface, who found self respect and respect for other people on the way.
And also… Magnus Hammersmith, who realized his mistake. Magnus Hammersmith, who had spent years full of rage and bitterness, regretting and wanting to reconnect. Magnus Hammersmith, realizing he was in the wrong.
#AOTD Spoilers#mtl#metalocalypse#nathan explosion#pickles the drummer#william murderface#toki wartooth#skwisgaar skwigelf#magnus hammersmith
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The Lost Girl
You just wanted to travel and forget all about the drama you left behind. You didn't expect to fall in with four boys who would become another family. Maybe more.
[Part One of Three]
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm- I'm alive? Surprise! I'm still in a bit of a pickle with where I want part two to go, but I figured if I post this now then I can't back out and delete it. I need your help, but I'll ask at the bottom so I won't spoil this.
Words: 7.9K
Santa Carla is the total opposite of Mystic Falls and you couldn't have loved it here more if you tried. You grew up with pageants and balls and trying to stay at the top of the popularity totem pole, but you secretly loathed every second of it. Not to mention your sister was a beacon for the supernatural, attracting vampires like no one's business, which eventually led to you getting caught in the crossfire and being turned at the ripe age of twenty.
Stefan Salvatore did his best to teach you how to feed and control your blood lust, but his techniques just weren't cutting it for you. So Damon took over, leading Bonnie, Matt, Elena, Jeremy, and Tyler deeming you untrustworthy. You don't know why they disliked your friendship with Damon so much, but their wariness of you only grew when you eventually befriended the Original Vampires that once sought to kill you, your family, and friends.
The last straw was when everyone started fighting over a cure for vampirism. They all thought there was enough of the cure to go around for all those who wanted it, but nope. There was only a single dose, and both Elena and Rebekah wanted it. So when you saw the lines being drawn, you packed a couple of bags and left to see the world.
The only person who knew of your travel plans were, surprisingly, Elijah and Klaus. Elijah was sad to see you go, especially since you were one of the only ones who he could trust, but Klaus was all for you seeing the world and experiencing life as you should have. You were more than content compelling your way through the trip, but the Mikaelson's were having none of that and gave you a card to use since they amassed a ridiculous amount of money over the years.
After deleting all social media, with the exception of a traveling Instagram account that was newly made, you bought a new phone and only gave your new number to Elijah and Klaus. You traveled abroad first, touring the most beautiful cities, museums, and seeing every landmark you could. You kept the Mikaelson brothers in the loop about everything that they sometimes surprised you by showing up for a week before flying back home.
For a year you saw all you could and then headed back to the States. You wanted nothing to do with Mystic Falls, Virginia, so you settled in California. Santa Carla was the most nitty gritty town you'd ever seen, and it was the last place anyone in your family would expect for you to stay in.
It was perfect.
With a new hotel having been built in Santa Carla, you compelled yourself one of the suites indefinitely. You didn't want to purchase a house in case you needed to up and leave, and having a housekeeper stop by weekly was perfect.
You stood out amongst the locals of Santa Carla, it seeming like everyone walking around either had some crazy hairstyle, hair color, or numerous piercings. And then there was you, skin untouched and the only piercings you had being those in your ears.
So after a week of settling in and compelling those who needed compelling, you finally decided to hit the infamous boardwalk.
The boardwalk, for some reason, feels like you've stepped into the past. Could be because of the music playing or the way everyone dressed, but you know you didn't actually slip into the past given the cell phones in people's hands or air pods in people's ears. The bells, whistles, and flashing lights make you giddy, taking you back to a time when you were excited as a child to be attending the annual fair Mystic Falls put on, but the attendees were the total opposites of those you'd find in Mystic Falls.
The employees in charge of the various game booths attempt to entice you to play, but you rather spend your cash at the crafts section of the boardwalk. There was no use in paying for a rigged game that made sure you lost ninety percent of the time when you could buy handmade crafts and help support someone's living.
After buying some handmade jewelry and a couple of shirts, you decide to eat. There's a Chinese place that smells marvelous as you stroll by, so you turn back around and enter the establishment. And then almost as soon as you're seated, a waitress comes by to take your drink order. You quickly skim the menu as she gets your drink, then order a bowl of Hot and Sour soup, a plate of Chicken LoMein, two egg rolls, and a pan of fried dumplings. The waitress seems impressed, and you merely laugh it off before sipping your Coke.
As you wait for your food, you grab a napkin and start ripping it apart piece by piece as you stare out the window you'd chosen to sit by. People pass by, uncaring for what's going on in the small restaurant, but then there are two boys that you just so happen to clash gazes with. Both fit with the eighties aesthetic- one with wildly tamed blonde hair that only a true rocker could pull off and the other with a dirty blonde, curly mullet. Both hairstyles are wildly out of place, even if they're trying to make a comeback now, but fortunately for the boys they can pull it off.
"Hey, chika, you want some company?" The blonde with the teased hair shouts so you can hear him through the window.
Holding back a wince at his loud volume, you shake your head. "Maybe next time!"
"Aw. Come on, babe. You're breaking my heart!" He pouts, even as his friend smirks behind his fist.
You shrug, grinning, but are saved from having to interact any further when the waitress appears with your food. As the food is set in front of you and you thank her, you glance at the boys one last time while giving them a wink before digging in.
You casually devour your food bit by bit, asking for a refill on your Coke only once. Then when you've had your fill, you ask for your leftovers to be boxed up. And as you walk outside, you hand said leftovers to a couple of teens digging through a trash can.
Walking around, you soak in the night time atmosphere. The sweat from the humans and the oil used to deep fry all sorts of food is rather distracting from the ocean scented air wafting in, but none of it is as distracting as the copper smell you pick up on one particular gust of wind. There doesn't seem to be any panic-induced mayhem on the boardwalk, so you figure someone must have cut themselves and is getting bandaged up.
A diner further down the boardwalk advertises milkshakes on its main window, and suddenly a strawberry milkshake sounds superb. So after making a quick trip inside to secure yourself a milkshake, you're back on the boardwalk once again.
No one has bothered you the entire time, but the moment you perch yourself on the railing to sip and people watch, one confident individual saunters towards you. It hardly takes you two seconds to realize this individual is in his teens obviously thinking you're a teen as well. But given you were twenty when you were turned and have spent a few years undead, you're so not interested in whatever this boy has to offer.
Before the individual can open his mouth, you hold a hand up to stall him and shake your head. "Stop right there. Not interested."
The boy's expression drops into shock before quickly morphing back into his too confident persona. "Aw, come on, girl. You look like you're in need of some fun."
"I am, but you need to be at least this tall-" you say while holding your free hand at least a foot above his head, "-for me to ride that ride."
There's a snort to your right, but you ignore it, even ignoring the presence that jumps onto the railing next to you before sliding their arm around your shoulder. "Sorry, kid. Maybe the next girl you hit on won't have a height requirement."
There's even more laughter and the boy rethinks his approach before scoffing and leaving. You grin, wrapping your lips around the straw of your milkshake and turning your head to your new companions. "Blondies one and two," you muse. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Just thought we'd play knight in shining armor," blondie one says. "I'm Paul. My friend is Marko."
"YN.."
Paul practically vibrates with energy. "So do I meet your height requirements?"
You laugh, uncaring when he steals your milkshake to sip from. "You may meet the height requirement, but I don't go for blondes. Sorry."
"Aw, chika, you wound me!" He feigns his hurt, holding a hand to his heart as you take your milkshake back. Marko can only laugh, shoving at his friend's shoulder when he leans a little too far his way. Once he corrects himself, he doesn't remove himself from your side. "So what's a pretty girl like you doing here all alone? Waiting for friends? Family?"
"Ugh, no." Your nose wrinkles. "Too much family drama for my tastes so I've been traveling the world for a little over a year now. Santa Carla seems like the least likely of places my family would think to look for me, so I'm staying as long as I can."
Marko seems interested as he leans around Paul to ask, "What's been your favorite place so far?"
"Tromsø, Norway," you reply.
"Why?"
"Because ever since I was a little girl, I've been obsessed with the aurora borealis. It's the best place to view it."
"Cool."
"Where are you staying?" Paul asks. "Maybe we can have a party one of these nights."
"Doubtful. I'm staying in a hotel suite and I have a feeling partying with you would lead to my place being trashed. No thanks."
Marko smirks. "Smart girl."
You grin and sip your milkshake as Marko comes around to lean against the railing on your other side. They ask some more about the places you've been, and you don't know what comes over you that you feel comfortable enough with these two to regale them with your tales of travel. In return, Marko and Paul tell you about themselves and their two other brothers. They tell you that they're all not originally from Santa Carla, but ended up finding each other throughout the years and made their own family unit in town.
Then just as you hop down to throw away your empty cup, the crowd seems to part as two individuals approach. Another blondie with a mullet and a brunette whose hair is almost as wild as Paul's. You can't tear your eyes from the brunette who is all too comfortable going shirtless with nothing but a weathered leather jacket hanging off his frame and some snug fitting jeans.
"Oh, I see how it is." Paul muses in your ear. "You like 'em dark haired."
You throw your elbow back, tearing your gaze away from the brunette in front of you to smirk over your shoulder at Paul when he grunts. Marko snickers at his brother's misfortune. "YN, this is David and Dwayne."
Both the new blondie and brunette nod at you, and you flash them back a faint smile. You're quick to toss your trash, then head back to your new friends. "Well, it was nice meeting you boys, but I should get going."
"Aw, come on, girlie. Hang for a bit more," Paul pleads, but you shake your head.
"Maybe next time."
"Will there actually be a next time or are you gently letting us down?" Marko wonders.
Your eyes roll. "We've only just met and you're already clingy?" You tut at him. Marko gapes and you wink at him. "Yes, there will be a next time. At least there will be if we cross paths again."
"We'll take that," Paul says. He slings an arm around Marko and smiles. "See you around, girlie."
The next afternoon, you decide to have some fun in the sun. You spend the early afternoon in your room, ordering room service and having a nice steak and fry lunch. While eating, you post a few pictures you snapped of the boardwalk nightlife, ferris wheel, and carousel all lit up. Then afterwards, you dress in a bikini before pulling on a pair of jeans shorts and a tank top. Only after slipping your feet into a pair of flip-flops do you pack a backpack with a beach towel, your phone, sunglasses, and some cash before taking your leave.
You're surprised to find that the beach isn't packed, so you pick a spot on the beach to lay out your towel and backpack. You spend a bit of time searching for sand dollars and shells, then go swimming in the ocean. Afterwards, you lay out on your towel with your sunglasses shielding your eyes. You doze on and off, and then just as the sun is setting you start to get up.
Shaking off your beach towel, you get rid of all the sand before folding it and shoving it into your backpack with your clothes. Then heading over to the beach showers, you rinse off all the sand and ocean water, and let yourself dry in the lingering sun rays before slipping your shorts back on.
In the middle of choosing what to eat, you hear catcalls and wolf whistles. You try to ignore it, hoping they're directed to someone else, but nope. They're directed at you. However, when you turn to glare and give the boys a piece of your mind, you find Paul and Marko beaming at you with their other brothers Dwayne and David just watching on.
Your glare vanishes and you roll your eyes as you slowly untense. "Do you guys have nothing better to do than check out girls on the boardwalk?"
"Nope." Paul hops off his bike and practically skips towards you. "What are you doing?"
"Heading to dinner. I spent most of the day on the beach so I'm starving."
"Ohhhh. What are we having?"
"I'm having pizza and wings. If you want to tag along, you buy your own."
"Done." He turns around and shouts, "Come on, boys. We're getting pizza!"
You shake your head and greet Marko when he approaches, smiling at the other two who have yet to speak up. Paul takes the lead and you walk side by side with Marko. The pizza place isn't far and you all head inside. You place your order first- a medium Hawaiian and a side order of boneless honey bbq wings. You accept your number tag after paying and then wait for your new friends to order as well. Then once they've got their own number tag, Paul leads the way to a large booth meant for a large group at the back.
Paul and Marko slide into opposite sides of the booth, and it only takes you a second to scoot in next to Marko before placing your bag at your feet. Paul gasps and you chuckle. "What? Marko seems less likely to continuously elbow me as I try to eat."
"That's cold, girl."
You wink at Paul and are surprised when Dwayne scoots in on your other side. David settles in next to Paul and his ice blue eyes practically pierce you. "So what's a girl like you doing out here all alone?"
"You mean Paul didn't tell you?"
"I'm asking you."
The coolness of his voice makes you arch an eyebrow at him, but Paul's snickering keeps you at ease. So in the end, you shrug. "My siblings and I weren't seeing eye to eye for a while. I had some money put away to take a trip out of the States, but my new found family wasn't having any of that and gave me access to their money. I've traveled for a year before coming back, staying in a place furthest from my hometown."
"Parents?"
"Dead." Paul's smile falters and you kick him under the table. "None of that. It's been a while. It's fine."
"How did it happen?" Marko asks.
You face him briefly before saying, "My sister had a fight with her boyfriend and asked our parents to pick her up from a party. They did, but on the way back home my dad somehow lost control of the car and drove off a bridge. A bystander found them, but by the time he dove under water, my dad made the bystander get my sister out first. My parents ended up drowning."
"Do you have plans on returning?"
"Eventually." Just then a waitress stops by to deliver your drinks. You grin as Paul immediately starts flirting, sipping your Coke as the waitress blushes and stutters before leaving. "These poor Santa Carla girls have no idea how to handle you, do they?"
"Not a clue."
As Marko and Paul laugh, you shake your head rather fondly. You don't know what it is about this group that makes you feel at ease with them, but you're glad to have some people to talk to while you're in town. Another group enters the establishment, a little unruly as they find themselves a table. One of them catches your gaze and you grimace when you notice him leering at you.
Feeling a little exposed, you reach for your bag under the table and pull free your tank top. You quickly pull it on and then free your phone while waiting for your food, not paying much attention to Dwayne who's shifting in his seat next to you. You do, however, notice when something is dropped on your shoulders and realize Dwayne has given up his jacket.
You freeze and quickly glance up at Dwayne, taking a moment to stare at all the bronze skin now on display, but his glare is directed at the table of troublemakers who are snickering among each other. "Uhh.."
"Just wear it."
"Okay."
Those are the first three words Dwayne has spoken to you and you absolutely do not shiver at the sound of his voice. Paul, Marko, and even David sense something else and you flip them off after slipping your arms through the sleeves of Dwayne's jacket. Then just as you go to sip on your drink, your phone starts ringing with a video call.
Big Bad Wolf, complete with a wolf emoji, is stamped across the top of your phone above a picture of a smirking Klaus. "Uhh, do you guys mind if I accept this?"
"Go ahead, girlie."
You accept the call, keeping it so that only you're on screen. "What do you want?"
"Is that any way to talk to me, love?" You roll your eyes, grinning, and Klaus chuckles. "What are you doing?"
"Uhh, I'm out to dinner with some new friends," you say.
"You've already made friends?"
"Mhm. Look." You turn so Marko is in frame. "This is Marko." Marko grins and nods. Then you flip the camera and catch Paul. "This is Paul and David is next to him, but David is glaring at me. I'm pretty sure he'd kill me if I put him on camera."
Klaus chuckles. "Fair enough."
"And then this.." You glance at Dwayne, but he merely arches an eyebrow at you. You grin and turn the camera on him. "This is Dwayne."
A split second later and then, "No."
"W-What?" You splutter. Paul and Marko choke on a laugh, and finally both David and Dwayne smirk. "What do you mean no?"
"Elijah!"
Your eyes widen. "Why are you calling 'lijah? Don't call 'lijah!"
Elijah appears next to Klaus and you groan. "Go on, sweetheart. Put your friend on."
"Marko? Or Paul?"
"Don't play dumb."
You grumble and put Dwayne on camera. "Absolutely not," Elijah says.
"You guys are embarrassing," you grumble. "He's literally only said three words to me."
"Mhm. And whose jacket are you wearing?" Klaus asks.
You pout. "I hate you." Just then you catch sight of two waitresses coming with your pizza. "Oh, look. Food's here! I'll talk to you gentlemen later."
"YN-"
"I'm fine, Klaus. I'm okay and I'm happy. I promise."
"Well okay then. Call me back when you get to your room."
"Will do, big bad wolf. Talk to you later."
You end the call just as a pizza is being placed in front of Paul and Marko, then yours is placed in front of you, and then another is placed in front of David and Dwayne. You're handed your boneless wings, and you happily wiggle in your seat. You're starving!
After you take your first bite of the sweet Hawaiian pizza, David asks, "So was that your boyfriend?"
"Ew. No." Your nose wrinkles and you quickly swallow your bite of food. "Klaus and Elijah are like my older brothers. They're the two who are funding my whole trip."
"They sound fancy with those posh accents of theirs," Paul muses.
"They are fancy," you admit. "They host balls and everything. I seriously hated wearing those dresses with a poofy skirt. They're so uncomfortable to sit in."
"No way!" Paul laughs.
"Mhm. Look."
As you eat some more of your food one-handed, you open the photos app on your phone and seek out the album from all the parties you attended. You hand your phone over to Paul, and Marko actually leans across the table to get a glimpse of the life you left behind.
As the two of them swipe picture after picture, laughing, you eat in peace. You even crack a grin when Dwayne picks off your tray of boneless wings, chuckling when he tells you it's payment for wearing his jacket. You end up having to tell the boys who is who every time they ask and deny any romantic relationship accusations when a picture of you dancing with Damon pops up. You admit he was a good friend up until his feelings for your sister clouded his judgment and you'd had enough of their drama.
Dinner proceeds uninterrupted, but it's when you get up to leave that the table of troublemakers from earlier causes an issue. With Dwayne's jacket returned to him, you follow the group as David leads the way out. You've just passed the table of leering individuals when a loud smack! resonates in the room and a brief stinging pain blossoms on your butt. You freeze, your new friends freeze, and then you're whirling around to glare at the culprit. You slowly look at the smug individual as his friends cackle like morons.
Anger flaring, your hand whips out and grasps the guy by the back of the neck. You slam his head down onto the table, causing him to grunt and his friends to fall quiet. You lean down so your mouth is next to his ear and grit out, "Touch me again and I'll rip your fucking throat out." You put pressure on his neck, causing the table to groan under the weight of the pressure. "With my teeth," you hiss. Pushing off the too quiet guy and facing your new friends once more, you shrug. "What?"
David, Dwayne, Marko, and Paul just stare at you before chuckling.
"You're scary, girl. I like it."
With a roll of your eyes, you step forward and push past Paul. "Come on. Show me what Santa Carla has to offer."
Over the course of a week, you hang out with who the locals have dubbed the Lost Boys. Paul and Marko treat you like a long lost best friend, Dwayne has taken to hovering over your shoulder, and David is pretty indifferent to your presence although he will stand up for you if need be. Your senses tell you there's something off about the boys, but you don't realize what it is until you scent the coppery fragrance of blood coming off of them one night they're late to meet you.
If they're vampires, they must be vampires who don't know who the Mikaelsons are because none of them recognized the family in your pictures. But you don't call them out, nor do you hint about yourself, at least not until you're walking on the beach one night and your senses are assaulted with the scent of a lot of blood and screams off in the distance.
Glancing around, you notice the boardwalk is empty and shutting down. The beach where you're at is empty as well, and as you speed towards the sound of terror, your suspicions are proven correct about the Lost Boys.
They're unlike any vampires you've seen, more brutal in their feeding than even the Big Bad Hybrid himself. Their vampire visages showcase a true monster, but for some reason it doesn't bother you as it probably should. They're sinking their fangs into necks, shoulders, torsos, and even skulls, laughing all the while their victims scream in horror.
In their feeding frenzy, they don't notice you standing just on the outskirts of the firelight. Limbs are ripped from bodies before being tossed into the fire, blood spraying carelessly across the sand. But the moment the frenzy dies down, you can't help but make an entrance.
Slowly clapping, you smirk as all four vampires freeze and turn towards you as you walk into the light. David snarls, his monstrous face still on display as Paul and Marko quickly change their features. Their expressions are a bit crestfallen as you continue to find amusement in this situation, so you walk towards Dwayne who has gone stoic. "I get the bloodlust, but do you guys have to be such messy eaters? Gross." You wrinkle your nose as you kick an arm into the raging fire.
"W-What?" Paul splutters.
Looking back at Dwayne, you reach over and run a finger through the blood staining his chest. Then popping that same finger into your mouth, you wrap your tongue around your finger and savor the fresh blood now coating your tongue. You feel the veins beneath your eyes slither to the surface and your fangs elongate in your mouth. Then meeting Dwayne's gaze, you flash him a fangy grin. "I prefer to compel, eat, and release, but you do you I guess."
"Holy shit. You- you're a vampire?!"
Meeting Marko's stunned expression, you wink.
"You have a lot of explaining to do," David says.
"Sure." You meet his now ice-blue gaze. "But only after you clean up after yourselves. This," you say while gesturing to their dismembered victims, "is sloppy."
You watch as David oversees the cleanup of their little section of the beach, burning the bodies and kicking sand over the spilled blood. Afterwards, they all take a dip in the ocean to cleanse themselves of their meal.
On the way to their bikes which are parked just a bit down the beach, Paul asks, "So how old are you?"
"Which age are you referring to? The age I was when I was turned or how many years I've been a vampire?"
"Both."
"I was turned at twenty," you say, "and I've been a vampire for less than five years."
"No shit? How were you introduced to this world?"
"That.. is a very long story. Why don't we get someplace where I can actually tell it?"
As their bikes get nearer, you hiss at Paul when he pushes you in Dwayne's direction. Almost as if it was expected of you to ride with Dwayne, he settles on the seat of his bike before offering you a hand so you can situate yourself behind him.
Hanging on loosely, you enjoy the ride and take amusement in the sudden turns and jumps they take to try and startle you. But instead of being shaken, you merely laugh and pinch Dwayne's side when you're jostled too much.
The drive to the cliffs that you know to be Hudson's Bluff, overlooking the disgruntled sea, is rather short. You have a moment to glance down a rickety, wooden staircase before the group is driving down them one by one. You're jostled even more as the bike is driven over various rocks and through a gaping hole in the fence that's meant to keep trespassers out. They drive into a cave where the bikes are then parked, and you climb off to follow Paul down a very humid path.
Swiping cobwebs, vines, and roots out of the way, you're then led into a cavernous room. There are shafts of moonlight lighting up the space, and then Paul and Marko fire up barrels all around the space. The place is trashed, but you quickly realize it's not a normal cave. There's a sofa, chairs, and a broken water fountain. There's what appears to be a long counter- or was it a desk?- and a tattered portrait hanging behind it.
"What is this place?" You ask as you glance around in wonder. They obviously made it their own- seashells and broken CDs hanging from every place available, as well as hundreds of melted candles over every surface. You even spot a mattress, pillows, and blankets hidden behind some type of gauzy material.
"This was the hottest resort back in the day," David drawls. "Too bad they built it on a fault line though. When the big one hit San Francisco in 1906, this place took a header down into the ground when it split open. It's been our home ever since."
"Nice." You plop down on a couch, sighing as you stare at each boy. "So what do you wanna know?"
"Everything." David takes a seat on a wheelchair, staring right at you. "Start from the beginning."
"Fair enough. I was born and raised in Mystic Falls, Virginia to parents who ran their own business. I didn't want for anything and ended up being a letdown when I wasn't into pageants as my mother hoped I would be."
"Did your parents even die by drowning?" Marko asks.
"Yes. That was true," you tell him. "After their death, my aunt Jenna took in me, Elena, and Jeremy. Both my siblings grieved differently, but when the new school year started, my sister did a complete turnaround when Stefan Salvatore entered the picture."
"Why do I get the feeling this Salvatore dude is a major player in your story?" Paul asks.
"Because he is. Unbeknownst to any of us, Stefan Salvatore was vampire number one. He was drawn to Mystic Falls all because of my sister Elena."
"Why your sister?" Dwayne asks, startling you. He rarely spoke up, but when he did, you couldn't help but be drawn to him.
"Do you guys know what a doppelganger is?" At their nods, you explain. "Elena was the latest human doppelganger. The previous doppelganger, Katherine, toyed with two brothers back in 1864. The Salvatore brothers, to be exact."
"Shit." Paul giggles. "Talk about a vampire novella."
"Anyway, Katherine toyed with Damon's feelings and made him fall in love with her. When she tried the same with Stefan, he resisted so she compelled him to love her. And then when it came to light that there were many vampires in town, every vampire was rounded up, vervained, and anyone who associated with them were killed. As it just so happens, the Salvatore brothers' father found out his sons were romantically linked with Katherine, so he shot them. Unfortunately for him, Katherine had been feeding the boys her blood, so when they were killed, they didn't stay dead for long.
"Fast forward to the present time and both Salvatores are now salivating for the newest doppelganger. Only this time, Stefan has fallen in love with Elena without any compulsion, and so has Damon. Katherine's apparently been keeping tabs on the brothers and she's not happy that Elena has the love of the brothers."
David makes a motion with his hand to hurry you along. "How did you turn?"
"Katherine has made it her mission to make Elena's life a living hell, so what better way than to kill one of her best friends and older sister?"
Paul gapes. "You're joking."
"Nope. The crazy bitch fed me her blood before snapping my neck, then smothered Caroline who happened to have Damon's blood in her system. When we woke up in transition and fed on human blood to complete the transition, half of our friends turned on us. We had to rely on Damon and Stefan to teach us to control our bloodlust, but things were never the same. And to top it all off, learning to become a vampire was the least of our worries."
"What's more important than knowing you've died and have to kill people to survive?"
"How about that one of the Original vampires- who is over a thousand years old, by the way- needs the blood of a human doppelganger to break the curse on him, so he decides it's his turn to make your family's life hell as well?"
"Oh shit. What curse?" Paul asks.
You slowly smirk. "Niklaus Mikaelson is not just one of the original vampires, but he's the one and only original hybrid. He's half vampire, half wolf, and one of the most lethal individuals that still walks this earth."
The boys fall silent, but then Marko speaks up.
"Hold on. The dude funding your trip around the world is the same person who made your life a living hell?"
"Yep," you muse. "We were at each other's throats for the longest time, then his sister killed my sister which turned her into a vampire as well, and there was just a shit load more drama with doppelgangers, witches, werewolves, and hybrids." You shrug. "Elijah was never truly terrible, so I spoke more with him first, but then Klaus really took the brother role to heart. The Mikaelsons have kind of adopted me, and my siblings and friends didn't take too kindly to that. So, to avoid all the drama, I left. And now here I am."
For the rest of the late night and early morning, you answer all questions you can. Paul and Marko are interested to see the differences between you and them, but David and Dwayne are more interested in learning about the Original vampires and their unique differences. Their biggest hangup, however, is that the sun has no effect on you like it does them. Sure you both will catch on fire, but it doesn't pull you to sleep the day away like it does them. You're a bit jealous that they can fly, but you're so much faster than any of them.
The moment David mentions the impending sunrise is your cue to go, so you bid farewell to your friends before winking at Paul and disappearing before they can even blink.
For the next couple of days, you keep yourself busy by running some errands for Klaus. You meet with vampires and piss off a couple of werewolf packs, but all in all the work gets done. You hadn't been able to keep in touch with the Lost Boys, so Paul and Marko whoop in cheer when they spot you.
"Well if it isn't Miss Mystic Falls," Paul muses. "Where the hell have you been, chika?"
"Sorry. Sorry!" You lean against the railing in between the group, grimacing. "I had a few things to do and since you're all allergic to modern technology, I couldn't text or call."
"Anything we need to know about?" David wonders.
Normally you'd say no, but Santa Carla is his territory and you don't want any bad blood with him. "Not really. I had a few things to pick up for Klaus and a few messages to deliver to some werewolf packs up North."
David frowns. "There are packs nearby?"
"The closest one is fifty miles out, but they're all pretty scared of Klaus and what he can do so they stay in line. If there's anything to worry about, it's any lone wolves who decide to take shelter in the woods around Hudson's Bluff and don't give a flying fuck about the Original Hybrid."
"Pft. We can take on a rogue werewolf if need be," Paul says.
"You say that now, but you won't be saying much when you get bitten by one. Remember, werewolf bites are lethal to us vampires." Paul's smugness dims. "Now who's good to eat around here? I didn't have time to grab some blood bags from the hospital."
"Stay away from the Surf Nazis," Dwayne says.
"Surf Nazis? What the hell kind of name is that?" Your nose wrinkles in distaste.
"A name that they've had since the eighties," Marko says. "It just stuck because they're still a bunch of racist and bigoted pricks."
"Fair enough. So, if I can't eat them, who can I eat?"
All four boys readily scan the crowd, excited at the prospect of picking your dinner.
"Do you have a preference? Male or female?" David asks.
"No junkies and I'm good with either male or female."
After mere seconds, David already has his pick. "On your three. Group of guys keep glancing this way. I'm pretty sure they're not checking Marko out."
You subtly glance at them and figure any one of them is good enough. "Alright. Since you guys are intimidating as fuck, you're gonna say goodbye and go do your own thing. Whoever approaches me first is dinner."
"Boo. You're no fun." Paul's the first hop off his bike, giving you a side hug. "We'll be watching from the roof."
"Of course you will." You roll your eyes, laughing.
Marko winks at you as he follows after Paul, David nods at you, but it's Dwayne who makes you arch an eyebrow at him as he glares at the group of guys before leaving. You chuckle at the oddness of it all before shaking it off and then pulling out your phone to kill some time.
It doesn't take long at all for someone to approach you and you easily fall into the role of the lone human girl way too easily. You chat for a bit and find out he's in fact in college, on break for a week and just looking for some fun. You tell him you're taking a gap year, just passing through Santa Carla and was hoping for some fun as well. His lecherous grin lets him know you have him on the hook.
"Wanna take a ride on the ferris wheel?" He asks.
"I'll do you one better. I say we visit an alley away from prying eyes without giving any ride operators an eye full."
"Oh, fuck yes."
Smirking in triumph, you hop off the railing and grab up the guy's hand. You briefly meet his friends' gaze before winking at them, leading their friend off to what they think is going to be a very good time. For you it will be, but for him? Not so much.
Once at an alley that doesn't have much traffic passing by either end, you lure the guy inside. In the middle of the alley, you turn so your back is against the wall and let him grab you by the hips. But as you cradle his face before he kisses you, you meet his gaze and say, "Don't scream. Don't fight. This will be painless."
The guy goes quiet, and you let your face change before his very eyes. He tenses, but he stays stock still without uttering a peep. Then reaching around to grasp the hair at the back of his head, you angle his head so you can sink your fangs into his neck. You drink and drink, satiating your thirst while listening for the first skip of his heart. When you've had enough, you clean his neck wound of any blood and then prick your tongue with a fang to smear your own blood on the bite wound. It heals after a minute, and you pull back to meet his gaze once more.
"When you get back to your friends, you're gonna be smug but also a little bit let down. Admit I'm the greatest kisser you've ever had, but before we could get to any of the good stuff, we were interrupted by a homeless couple."
"We were interrupted by a homeless couple," he parrots back.
"Good boy. Now to make things more believable..." You slowly smirk before pulling him close, capturing his lips with your own.
The guy is shaken out of his compulsion and his arms wrap low around your waist to pull you even closer to him. You kiss him roughly to make sure his lips appear swollen and even muss his hair up. But the moment you reach under his shirt and rake your nails across his back, causing him to groan, you hear someone drop down beside you.
One second, you're enjoying a kiss and the next your victim is shoved away from you. Dwayne practically puts himself between you and your meal as he snarls, "Get. Lost."
The other individuals drop down into the alley, and you meet three amused expressions. Paul and Marko are snickering quietly whereas David is smirking at his dark-haired brother.
"You alright there, Dwayne?"
Dwayne turns, expression unimpressed at David's question. Instead of answering him, he turns his stare on you. "What?" You feign innocence. "I had to sell it. His friends needed to believe I brought him in here for anything other than feeding."
"Whatever. Next time, just kill the guy."
As Dwayne stalks off, you smile at his back. The moment he disappears, you ask, "Was that- was that jealousy?"
"Yep." Paul skips to you, draping an arm around your shoulders. "Dwayne's always been possessive, but it's been a long time since he took real interest in someone."
"This is going to be fun," Marko muses.
You roll your eyes and sigh but can't help but agree.
Over the course of another few days, it's now very obvious that Dwayne's hovering wasn't just because you were a female. He most definitely knows you can take care of yourself, yet he's still there, but now he's openly snarling when someone looks at you a little too long. To placate him, you only ride with him and pull him into the V of your thighs when you're sitting on the railing. He starts tensing up the moment you all people watch for your next meal and other guys stare back, but the tension drops from his shoulders when you hop onto the railing, pull him into the V of your thighs, and hug him from behind.
Nothing intimate happens between you and Dwayne, but it becomes an unspoken rule among the small coven that you're off limits.
Everything seems to be going well until you meet the boys on the boardwalk one night and David looks livid.
Your smile instantly vanishes. "What's wrong?"
"The woods smell like fuckin' dog," he seethes.
Immediately your gaze snaps towards the sky and your heart sinks. "It's a full moon."
"We know. We're gonna try and kill this wolf for stepping into our territory and pissin' all over the place."
"What?" Your voice is lethally quiet as you meet David's gaze. "You have to be joking. One bite- hell, even one nip!- is a death sentence."
"We'll be fine. We just thought we'd let you know."
As they turn to mount their bikes, you swear. "Goddammit. Wait for me. You're not doing this alone."
You climb onto the back of Dwayne's bike, wrapping your arms around his waist as you glare at the others for their idiotic choices. They're quite solemn as they drive to the woods, and you keep your eyes peeled for the werewolf in question. As they come to a stop, you climb off and glance around the eerily quiet woods.
"So do you have any tips on tracking a werewolf?" Paul muses.
You gulp. "It's a full moon and this wolf most likely claimed these woods as theirs. It'll be hunting us."
The boys chuckle and start walking, combing the woods for any sight of the wolf. It isn't long until a twig snaps- a twig that neither you nor the boys have stepped on. You all freeze.
"Showtime?" Marko wonders.
You sigh. "Be prepared to run. Werewolves can match a vampire's speed on the nights of a full moon."
"We'll be alright."
Almost as soon as the words leave Marko's mouth, the werewolf rushes in. It takes down Paul by his knees, standing on his back and snarling. Before he can snap his jaws, you rush over and kick the werewolf to send it flying.
"What the fuck was that?!" Paul incredulously asks as he hurriedly climbs back to his feet.
"A werewolf," you deadpan. "Keep your guard up. It'll come back."
For a few minutes, it seems like the werewolf is toying with all of you. It keeps knocking down the boys, snarling before disappearing. You've kicked it off your friends three times by now, but the second you hear a howl in the distance, you and the boys freeze.
"There's a second one?" You ask. David shrugs and you bite your tongue to keep from giving him a verbal lashing. "It was stupid to do this on the night of a full moon. We need to leave right now, and I'll do my best to sniff out the werewolves tomorrow so we can handle them when they're in their human forms."
"How much harder can two werewolves be?"
"Pretty fuckin' hard, David. I know you're a badass and all, but we need to do this another night."
Before David can answer, Dwayne shouts. You whirl around, eyes widening at seeing a werewolf pinning him to the ground with its sharp teeth inches from his face. Without thinking, you fly at the wolf, tackling it off of him. You and the wolf scramble for the upper hand and you hiss when there's a pain in your shoulder.
Eventually, you manage to pin the wolf to the ground by its neck and shove your hand into its chest cavity to yank out its heart. With the wolf dead, you toss the heart aside. "Now will you listen to me? This was such a stupid fucking idea." The boys remain quiet, staring at her.
Actually, they're staring at your shoulder.
"What?"
Dwayne steps forward, carefully reaching for your arm and pulling you a step towards him. You frown, but then hiss when he moves the neckline of your shirt off your shoulder. "You're bit."
Your heart falls into your stomach and you quickly glance at the shoulder that you now realize is burning. Your eyes fill with tears. "O-Oh."
"Oh? Oh?!" Dwayne nearly shouts. "Werewolf bites are lethal, remember? How could you be so goddamn stupid?!"
Your bottom lip trembles. "I'm well aware of that, Dwayne. I was the one who told you to hunt the werewolf another night, remember?" You sigh and pull your hand free from his grasp. You take a moment to collect your thoughts before admitting, "There's a cure. Only a select few know and the cure is hard to get your hands on unless you're on friendly terms with those who have access to it. It's not my secret to divulge, so I was compelled to not say anything unless it was an emergency."
"What is it?" Dwayne asks. "We'll get it."
"You can't. But I can," you admit. "Let's just get to the cave. I have a phone call to make."
So, for part two, do we want the Mystic Falls gang to follow Klaus to Santa Carla or do we want the Santa Carla gang to visit Mystic Falls?
#the lost boys#the lost boys imagine#the lost boys fanfiction#lost boys x reader#the lost boys x reader#dwayne x reader#the vampire diaries imagine#the vampire diaries fanfiction#david#dwayne#paul#marko#klaus mikaelson#elijah mikaelson
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Also I love your blogs sorry I’ve been spamming 🩷Hii Author, could you do another part for the small prehistoric reader, where she is actually really strong even though she’s small and innocent looking like stronger than Yujiro and Baki but she’s only really like that when she’s in heat. I wonder how the would react Yk 🤔
Sure! It’s been suggested in the comments as well and it does have a fun twist to it. Female characters stronger than the main cast is the one uncanonical construct that I deeply enjoy.
Baki Characters x Prehistoric! Small Reader Headcanons (II)
Featuring the Baki characters and a prehistoric but small sized reader that turns out to be unexpectedly strong.
[Baki Masterlist] [Part I]
The fighters keep a respectable distance from you in order to assure Pickle of your safety. They’d rather not pose as a threat to his mate, especially after seeing how protective he can get. He always keeps you under his watchful gaze, ready to interfere if you need to make use of his strength. At times he’s particularly anxious around you. Professor Payne has explained in more scientifically appropriate terms that you might be dealing with female specific issues. No one pressed it further.
This peaceful resolve does not sit well with Yuujirou. How very pathetic and boring that everyone concomitantly agreed to mind their own business. He itches for a little bit of action and what better way to rile up the prehistoric warrior than messing with his little protégé? He doesn’t want to risk fighting a half-assed Pickle, he wants the wrath, the readiness to kill. So with arrogant mockery he decides to give you a little nudge in front of everyone. Just a mere push, he does show mercy to weaklings like you. Baki is enraged and the other men join him. Everyone is waiting for Pickle to make his move, though bizarrely enough he just stands there, eyes wise in shock. Yuujirou didn’t expect this lack of reaction.
The Ogre is a man with battle experience and nothing can take him by surprise. It is to be noted, however, that sometimes a trade off for the sake of efficiency has to be made. A rational agent in artificial intelligence may have to take millions of variables into consideration in order to compute the most optimal solution and react to the environment. Realistically speaking, therefore, some less probable events are taken entirely out of the equation. So, for example, the idea that you would attack Yuujirou was not something his body expected to react against. The impact of your small fist was doubled by this element of surprise. His eyes roll back and his large body is thrown at quite the distance, leaving significant damage behind.
There’s a deafening silence that lingers for what seems an eternity. Baki feels a mild discomfort on the walls of his throat and he realizes his mouth has been hanging open for long enough that it almost dried up. Did you…did you just knock his father out with one single hit? He slowly turns his head to the other witnesses, wondering if this is a dream and the others will confirm it. Judging by the equally dumbfounded expressions surrounding him, he suspects fearfully that it is, in fact, something that just happened. Jack feels like he’s been kicked in the crotch. Katsumi is overwhelmed by a certain nostalgia, the nervousness he felt when he was a little child attending the Dojo for the very first time. Retsu purses his lips as a solemn frown creases his features. Tokugawa can feel the beads of sweat gathering in the folds of his wrinkled forehead.
The least impressed of the group is Pickle. Almost as if he expected it to happen, he walks up to you and grabs your shoulders before you can approach Yuujirou’s passed out body. Your face relaxes once again and you look up to him with a genuine smile, as if soothing his worries. You’ll stop here, no worries. You pat his large hands and turn around, prepared to leave the scene.
The frightful question now plagues the fighters within the arena: was Pickle protecting you from them, or has it been the other way round all along?
#baki#baki the grappler#baki headcanons#baki hanma#pickle baki#yujiro hanma#yuujirou hanma#prehistoric reader
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no pickles
stellaron hunters & gn!reader | wc: ~750
In which they get your order wrong. Kafka, dear friend that she is, decides to make it known.
tags/warnings: crack, reader is not described, vague canon-typical violence, comedy, found family, everything is platonic
notes: oops updated formatting
When you first joined the Stellaron Hunters upon Elio’s suggestion (death threat), you never would have imagined the scene unfolding in front of you now.
Silver Wolf is double-dipping a greasy french fry into a dollop of ketchup. Kafka is dabbing her mouth with a napkin after her only sip of whatever soda she decided to humor, and Blade is standing guard by your table like some kind of intimidating fast-food sentry.
You, squished between all of them, lament your existence. Sam got to stay behind to “keep watch”, but you know the truth. His robot suit would terrify any children within a fifty mile radius, and this CosmiBurger is teeming with them.
“Silver Wolf,” you mutter.
“I’m not sharing,” she answers immediately.
“That’s not what I–! Ugh, whatever. I was gonna ask why you chose this place for lunch. Don’t you think it’s a little below our pay grade?”
“We don’t get paid, newbie. Elio doesn’t cover us eating out, so we have to be cheap.”
“You’re just saying that because you blew our budget on Roblox Premium,” you deadpan.
Kafka interjects. “Look on the bright side, hm? The novelty here is something we rarely get to experience - and I don’t think I’ve ever seen Bladie this happy.”
You spare a glance at your colleague. His scowl speaks for him.
Ignoring the fact that apparently Kafka’s got jokes now, you heave a sigh and poke at the lump of foil in front of you - a tangible warning of an impending stomach ache. The burger inside will have to serve as sustenance if you don’t want to wait twelve more system hours to eat.
Since Silver Wolf is now preoccupied with one of her handheld consoles, you don’t delay with your squabbling any longer. When you unwrap it and take your first bite, you’re blindsided by the overwhelming sour note of what can only be The Condiment That Shall Not Be Named. You can’t obscure the subsequent (ugly) scrunch of your brow and lips.
“Cyanide?” asks The Gamer That You Will Strangle One Day.
You glare at her and deposit your now even-more-unappetizing sandwich on the table. “You wish. They, uh, just got my order a bit wrong.”
There’s a contemplative hum from your side that makes your heart skip a beat. Kafka stops playing with a strand of Blade’s hair to give you a coy smile. “Is that so?”
“Don’t look at me like that,” you complain. “It’s not a big deal, I’m just not a fan of pickles.”
“You should ask for a replacement. After all, you did mention that in your order,” she drawls.
You bristle. “I doubt the employees get paid enough to put up with that.”
Blade speaks for the first time today in that gruff tone of his. “You draw the line there? You’ll slaughter on command but stop at inconveniencing the working class?”
“Everyone’s picking on me! Smear campaign!” you accuse, pointing at the brooding man.
You don’t expect a reply from him, which he honors by staring at your outstretched finger with what could be described as murderous intent. Kafka chuckles.
“It’s the principle of the thing, darling. I’ll handle it.”
“Wai–”
You don’t get another word out before she confidently rises from her seat and saunters over to the register, leaving you with your jaw on the floor.
Silver Wolf is back to blowing bubblegum and spawn-killing some poor sap, but she makes the time to snicker at your plight. “That’s weak, newbie.”
All you can do is become an idle passenger in your own body as the scene unfolds in front of you. Maybe you try to stop her, but Blade’s lanky arm blocks your path.
Sometimes you wish she’d just have a little more fear. Kafka converses with the cashier with her innate allure as you resign yourself to your fate of public humiliation.
The words audible over the ringing in your ears sound through the air in Kafka’s dulcet voice.
“They asked for no pickles.”
When she returns from the counter two minutes later with your presumably correct order, you’ve already decided that today has been the most harrowing twenty-four system hours of your long-life. Your stupor is cut short as the new pickleless burger is dropped into your hands like a gift from the Aeons.
“See?” Kafka teases. “It was no trouble at all.”
“..Thanks,” you cough into your hand awkwardly.
Lunch resumes its usual flow, but you’re still stewing in regret that boils down to a simple, bitter thought: You should’ve just ordered the chicken nuggets instead.
#✧ my works#—stellaronhvnters.#honkai star rail#platonic honkai star rail#platonic honkai star rail x reader#platonic kafka x reader#platonic silver wolf x reader#platonic blade x reader#hsr x reader#hsr kafka#hsr blade#hsr silver wolf#blade x reader#kafka x reader#silver wolf x reader
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Random JadeYuu scenarios because I also have no self control:
Earth and Twst have completely different species of mushrooms and Yuu tells him about earth mushrooms and then they try to cross breed different types of mushrooms to get this One Really Cool Mushroom from Yuus world
Similarly, Yuu tells jade about the Himalayan mountains and Mt Everest (I know a weird amount if Mt Everst lore)
Jazz band! Maybe there's a style of jazz that only exists in twst or on earth and they just combine them to get a whole new jazz! Like cyber jazz or something (That's actually a newly invented genre irl)
Visiting the coral sea and Yuu just starts trying to find old ocean fossils like a fucking nerd
Visiting the coral sea and Yuus trying to figure out why Jade is glowing like the fish equivalent if a glow stick
They go to a rave. Idk they just do shrooms and go to a rave in scarabia. Ft high clingy Jade
Silently courting Jade and watching him flip out
Teaching him how to drive (he cannot)
I love jadeyuu, getting random jadeyuu brainrot increases my lifespan... probably... i think...
I think this is such a cute idea. Apparently our world has deep sea mushrooms so I think it would be very cute of JadeYuu to go diving looking for Twisted Wonderland's equivalent. I also really like the idea of them trying to research how to crossbreed mushrooms for completely wholesome and mundane reason but ending up with a bunch of information on how to grow psychedelics. This is fine by them too.
Jade would have such a silly painfully in love face while Yuu talks about the mountains of their world. He memorizes every word you say and kisses you painfully slowly afterwords, he really loves when you tell him things about your world that make him want to see it. (Mt. Everest makes me sad because all I really know about it is how tourism has been fucking things up for it.)
I really love jazz music ( ˘▾˘)~ and the idea of music evolving in a different way in different worlds is not something that I think is too far fetched, music is influenced by the culture around it and the Coral Sea is super different from anything in Yuu's world. Jade would really enjoy playing music with Yuu, I think he would feel like it would help him understand them better.
Floyd would find this so funny. He already makes fun of you on the log in screen for collecting random junk, and now you are grabbing random sea shit too? This is hilarious. Even funnier that Jade gets super defensive of you and tries to help you pick out the nicest things to bring back to the surface. Don't listen to him pearl there really is no accounting for taste these days.
( ` ꒳ ´ )✧ hehe Jade can control his facial expressions but he cannot control his body's mating signals. He's literally glowing with happiness at having you here, under the sea, all to himself, and so... soft looking. Vulnerable even, so why is he the one breathing heavy and feeling faint? You're unbearably close and so painfully gentle with him as you trace the light down from his shoulder to his chest... come on now, be a bit bolder and go deeper, won't you? (his smile is all teeth and he's literally shaking, which is only worrying Yuu more)
I'm just picturing Jade glued to Yuu's side, really touchy and so honed in on you he's forgotten that you are technically in public. He's saying absolutely filthy things... at least you think he is. He's kind of mumbling and the music is really loud, but you know where his hands are going... maybe you should get out of here before Jamil kills you.
You hand Jade a handmade bracelet and watch him have the most stressed out smile as he tries to determine if you want him or want him while he tries to not make it too obvious which one he wants. You know. You know which one he wants everyone does he is so not slick.
Yeah he refers to something as a "dilly of a pickle" his ass can't drive. I bet he gets horrible motion sickness when riding in cars, similar to how he is with roller coasters in the Playful Land event. He still wants to learn how so he can helpfully insist on driving Azul somewhere (he wants to watch him throw up.)
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Hello I wanted to request another single!mom x Fernando fic as your other one is so great! Maybe one where the reader is pregnant (the father of the child left once reader told him she is pregnant) and wherever whenever she meets Nando and he is just enchanted by her not bothered that she is carrying another mans child
A/N: Dad Fernando will be the one to single handedly kill me, I'm not joking
One shot, not second part
He didn't care.
You were 3 months pregnant, and your new boyfriend could care less that you're caring another man's child. To him he just brushed it off saying it doesn't matter who the father is it's who raises them.
It made you cry when he told you that he wasn't leaving. And he stayed true to those words, he never left you. Fernando was there for everything.
The morning sickness, the appointments, cravings, he didn't care that you called him one night while he was halfway across the world crying because you couldn't open a jar of pickles. He still smiles fondly at the memory of you texting him an hour later saying his assistant opened the jar for you.
If you could travel, Fernando is bringing you with him. The media claimed him as the father of your ever-growing belly. He couldn't stop smiling at the article. Reads to your baby every night, if he's away traveling you best put that man on speaker and to your stomach.
The team spoils you and the baby, they love having you because Fernando just glows with happiness and shows you off to everyone who will listen. Carries a little picture of your ultrasound with him and kisses it before getting in the car.
He was honored to be the one to feel the first kick when he was praising the baby for being good while he was away. Refused to know the gender of the baby just buying them anything and everything.
Has you move in before the baby is due, doesn't care you haven't been dating for long. The two of you know damn well this is it for you.
Has to race on the day of your due date and about quits right then and there. Threw a huge fit, you had to call and calm him down saying nothing has happened.
2 weeks and you still hadn't given birth. Fernando was annoyed, he wanted his little baby in his arms so he can be the annoying dad showing them off everywhere.
when your water breaks, he's super calm. Yet when he hears that it's a boy and those little cries. He breaks down into your hold thanking you for this family and his son. You laugh saying your welcome. Fernando refuses to let the nurses touch the baby unless needed. You best believe that boy was decked out head to toe in Aston Martin gear when he announces the birth.
#f1#formula 1#f1 fandom#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x y/n#formula one#f1 scenario#f1 fluff#f1 blurb#f1 one shot#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#fernando alonso x reader#fernando alonso fluff#dad!fernando#fernando imagine#fernando alonso imagine#fernando alonso#fernando alonso blurb
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Happy holidays! Something from the Professor Riddle universe?
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15
"Harry asked me about Sirius."
Tom glances up, slumped at the kitchen table and waiting for Myrtle’s hangover cure to kick in. He has got to stop drinking with Ruby, especially with his ex-wife and Minerva. It never ends well for him.
Regulus sips his coffee, a smirk on the corner of his mouth although he’s thankfully keeping his thoughts on his haggard appearance to himself. He never looks closer to his actual age than after a night of drinking. Ruby, perversely, looks even younger. Tom is convinced that he’s maintaining his youthful appearance through pickling. The half giant part is probably a not insignificant contributor, but he’s convinced it’s the moonshine doing the heavy lifting.
“What did you say?”
He shrugs. “The truth. There’s really not much to say, is there? It’s not like it’s a secret that that lot was convinced that Dumbledore wasn’t that bad, despite the death count.”
“To be fair,” he says and Regulus groans, “we didn’t know it was him for a long time.”
“You did,” he returns.
Yes, but he cheated. “He meant well.”
Regulus stares. “Dad. A lot of people died.”
“Well, sometimes things have to be sacrificed for the greater good,” he says, mouth twisting. “I think Grindewald – broke him. A little. And he wasn’t wrong, probably. Starting a war designed to kill everyone who’s politics you disagree with probably would have ended in some sort of utopia. For him, at least.”
“I don’t get why you still defend him,” he sighs. “You killed him!”
He hadn’t wanted to.
“Seems only right that I defend him then, doesn’t it? It’s the least I can do.”
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I need you
Olivia benson x fem!reader
(Warnings): hurt/comfort, mentions of murder, cussing, Olivia being a simp and a softie
“Benson.” Olivia rasped our tiredly and you smiled at the sound of her voice. “Hey liv.” You said and you heard her sigh “what’s wrong y/n?” Olivia questioned you and you knew something was wrong, you just didn’t know what. “Nothing. I’m just really hungry and was hoping on your way home you could get me a cheese burger with extra extra pickles?” You asked her and she sighed once again making you frown.
“Maybe I don’t know. I’m really busy right now hon. I’m having a tough case and we really need to catch this guy.” She said while you were trying to understand why she can’t be home right now. “Please come home liv…please I miss you so much.” You said getting choked up and she felt her heart break at the sound of your voice but she had to catch this guy.
“I’m sorry baby. I’ll check in on you later okay?” She said and you whimpered back in response and hung up causing Olivia to run her hands through her hair angrily and sigh loudly. She feels terrible. All you wanted was a cheese burger and your wife. She understood that but she needed this guy to be caught and out of the streets for everyone’s safety, especially yours.
~ a couple hours later ~
Olivia went by McDonald’s on her way home to get you your cheese burger. It was around 11 o’clock when she finally got off of work. Fin came into her office a few moments after the phone call she had with you and filled her in about how they caught the guy and he’s in the station being processed. She couldn’t be more happy and grateful that he was finally Caught. But it dawned on her how she treated you and she felt awful.
So, Before she went home with your bag of food, she decided to go to the store to get you some of your favorite flowers, chocolates, snacks, and candy. She feels awful and she wanted to make it up to you. She headed back to y’all’s house and opened the door with her keys. The jingling sound made you startled and you jumped up and got a knife from the kitchen. You slowly walked to the door and was about to attack when someone grabbed your arm and turned on the light. “Liv?! What the fuck! You scared the shit out of me!” You said breathlessly and handed her the knife. “Well at least you weren’t almost stabbed by your own wife.” She chuckled and you rolled your eyes at her with a small smile on your face.
“I thought you were supposed to call to check in on me? But seeing you is much better.” You mumbled out and she sighed. She took you into her arms carefully, trying not to hit your bump as she held you in her muscular arms. “Well…we caught the bastard and decided to get you “im sorry for being a jerk of a wife” gift.” You looked at her confused until she held up some bags filled with your favorite things and your cheese burger. You immediately snatched the McDonald’s bag from her and started eating it. “Thk y-u..” you mumbled out with your mouth filled with food. She chuckled and kissed your forehead softly. “Anytime sweetheart. Here, let’s have you sit and I’ll give you a foot massage as I tell you what happened.” She explained and you nodded. She guided you to the couch with your food in hand and she sat you down as she placed your feet in her lap. She started massaging your feet and you moaned loudly which caused her to smirk.
“Oh get that smirk off your face you horn dog.” You grumbled out and she laughed which made you smile. You continued eating as Olivia told you a brief summary about the case since she can’t share all of the details to you. She told you that this guy was killing pregnant women and how she wanted to catch this son of a bitch in case he went after you. Olivia wouldn’t ever let anything happen to you, she will protect you with her life. You finished your meal as she finished her story and you gave her a soft smile. “I wish you would have told me…I honestly thought you were being distant with me…” you confessed to her and she gave you a sad look. “No sweetheart…im so sorry that I made you feel like that…I just really wanted to catch this bastard and I wanted him off the streets as soon as possible.” She explained to you and you leaned up to her and kissed her softly on her lips.
She kissed you back gently and held your face in her hands. The both of you pulled back and gave each other big smiles. “So…what else did you get me to eat.” You smirked and she laughed. “I got you your favorite chocolates, snacks, and candy.” She replied and you gasped excitedly making grabby hands at the bags on the floor near Olivia. She chuckled as she handed you the bags and you stared munching on them while Olivia watched you with a adoring look on her face. “Do you forgive me babygirl?” She asked you and you smiled at her. “Of course I do silly. I couldn’t stay mad at you. You were just doing your job I know that. I was just a little insecure I guess.” You said and she gave your forehead another kiss “I understand baby…but just know that I don’t distance myself from you on purpose. I just get so caught up in my work that sometimes Im distant. But just know that I love you so much darling.” She explained to you and you gave her a loving smile.
“I love you most liv.” “And I love you too little bean-son.” She joked and you giggled at the nickname she kept calling y’all’s unborn child. You felt the baby kick in response and you quickly laid Olivia’s hand on your bump and the baby kicked again which made Olivia break out a huge smile. She leaned down and gave your bump a gentle kiss. Olivia started talking to the baby as you ran your fingers through her short hair and she kept giving your stomach loving kisses.
A/n: my first Olivia benson imagine! I hope y’all enjoy and know that winter/Christmas requests are open for all the people that I write! Remember to stay hydrated and rest! I love y’all! :)
#olivia benson x fem!reader#olivia benson x you#olivia benson fluff#olivia benson x reader#olivia benson headcanon#olivia benson one shot#olivia benson#olivia benson x pregnant!fem!reader#mariska hartigay#mariska hargitay imagine#mariska hargitay x reader#mariska hargitay#law and order fanfiction#law and order special victims unit#law and order svu#svu
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Can I request a headcanon/oneshot where baki has a very cute s/o and pickle just so happens to escape the arena and runs into the cute s/o and everyone scared they'll be eaten pickle is nice and cute with the s/o and the scientists says they're looking at eachother like how kids look at puppies and s/o teaches pickle tricks making yujiro mad he's no longer fighting
(Thanks for requesting! I’m a bit confused on what to write but I hope this is accurate)
Type of story: Sfw🎂
Warnings: none
Afab reader
Your boyfriend Baki had called you to the arena place so you make your way over there, as you were walking to the back doors where the fighters rest at a 8ft figure runs out like a zombie aplcolapyse everyone is shouting and running for lives as they thought they were going to be killed. The scientists were keeping an eye on him through the cameras to make sure he wasn't causing a scene like this. But when they checked his emotions he wasn't angry at all. He was looking around wondering why people were running from him. But you weren't which he spotted out quickly. He tilts his head wondering why you weren't running like the others. He walks up to you slowly lowering his head to look at you. (Basically the GIF) You look at him with those innocent puppy eyes, as he does the same. He cups your face smelling you and licking your cheek. The scientists were happy to see him liking you. While you had some time you wanted to teach him some fighting techniques, little did you know Yujiro was watching you guys the whole time and boy was he not happy.
I HOPED YOU LIKED IT!
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I LOVE YOU, ITS RUINING MY LIFE
PLOT:
It’s the biggest trial of the year and the whole world is watching. Stakes are higher and tension is higher. Little do they know, the prosecutor and defence attorney are in love.
OR
Harry is a popular defense attorney in London & Y/N is a popular prosecutor. Both are known for rarely losing & now they’ve found themselves in a pickle.
☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:✧*⋆.*:･ﾟ✧.: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ ☾
WARNINGS:
Mentions of murder, blood, and the likes (nothing too graphic), smut (in the future), angst, fluff, etc. will add more if any others pop up!
AUTHORS NOTE:
Hello!! Ive been MIA, sorry. However, ive come bearing gifts! Below the cut is a sneak peak at this new short series (no more than 6 parts atm). Im working on the other series’ too, sorry for the delay. Hope you can forgive me. Anyways i hope u enjoy defense attorney!Harry 🫶🏼 the preview also isnt proof read, so excuse any typos. Meaning things WILL be changed / could be changed & moved around! Not sure of word count, but cant be more than 1500. Its short.
London hasnt seen a case this high profile since the case of Harold Shipman, who killed up to 250 victims. Many feared this may be another case of Jack The Ripper, as they double checked their doors at night, hoping the serial killer wasn’t going to show up at their door. The relief that washed over the town when the police had finally caught the man whom they think is responsible for the latest killings of 20 men and women. The scenes were too graphic to show on tv.
Y/N ended up with the case. The crime scene photos were unnerving to her and interviewing the victims families made it even worse. Bile creeping up throat as she read the horrific things that happened to each victim. She wanted to know this case by the back of her hand, because of course she was up against one of the top defense attorneys in the country. He rather lost and found plot holes in every single case, having a 97% success rate with getting his clients off the hook and their record clear. She thought noone would pick up the mans case, there was so much evidence that pointed towards the man.
Harry was attractive, tall, dark hair and those piercing greenish hazel eyes. Y/N was nervous and she hated being that way. Harry often came by the law firm, having connections with anyone and everyone. His career was unmatched, he was handsome, wealthy, the whole package. Yet he was single and that blew Y/N’s mind.
Harry was just as shocked as Y/N to learn they’d facing each other in court. He was certain his client did it, but, he had to defend him anyways. He was called by the court to do it pro bono, as noone else wanted to take the case. If he lost, his numbers would certainly be impacted. If he won, people may look at him differently in a moral sense. Surely though there was a plot hole and the prosecution would slip up. He couldnt believe it was Y/N who got the case. Soft, shy, gorgeous Y/N. He already developed this small crush on her and now he had to take her on in court? Surely this wasnt a good thing. It had to be God punishing him for helping criminals and making a good living while doing so. Harry always viewed her as the more submissive type and his dirty thoughts were hard to keep at bay. Maybe that was the reason God was punishing him.
While Harry laid awake, staring at the ceiling, Y/N was doing the same. Y/N had never seen Harry in action, but, she’s heard how he’s always been strict and concise in the court room. His dominant side coming out, and that scared Y/N. Especially because she imagined him being dominant somewhere else, mainly at night when she lay in bed alone with her thoughts and hands.
#harry styles#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x reader#harry styles filth#harry styles smut#harry smut#my writing#defense attorney!Harry#harry styles fluff#forbidden trope
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s3 of rnm is like crack to me it's so fucking good like you begin with an episode that completely undermines the remorse rick showed at the end of s2 and he settles in as the most powerful person in the family, with jerry gone, beth perpetually forgiving him and morty and summer at his heels for adventures, and that power lasts for all of one episode before the dysfunctionality of this new family setup begins to get too much for him. he's barely able to make robot copies of himself summer and morty that are competent enough to last while he drags the two teens back home, and then after that it's L after L till the end of the season.
he nearly dies in pickle rick over something extremely petty while a therapist sows the seeds in morty and summer's minds that rick isn't nearly as deserving of their respect and attention as they might've thought
in vindicators he makes a complete ass of himself because morty doesn't see him as his hero, and in doing so he further tarnishes his own image in morty's eyes
in the whirly dirly conspiracy rick nearly dies because of jerry, of all people, meanwhile back home it's revealed that morty is so sick of rick (because of the vindicators thing, but also, like, everything) that he faked concern for jerry just so rick would orchestrate this pity adventure and leave him alone for a bit
in rest and ricklaxation rick fucks up so badly that he takes himself and morty on a vacation, comes face to face with his worst qualities, and spends the latter half of the episode with his attachment to morty permanently on his sleeve while he vehemently denies its existence
ricklantis mixup isn't about rick c-137 but it's a citadel episode with evil morty what more do you want
in morty's mind blowers the worst memories of rick and morty's relationship leads them to try to kill each other then enter a fucking suicide pact
in the abc's of beth rick is asked by beth if he wants her in his life or if he wants her to live up to her potential, and we later find out that he was so unprepared to have any sort of emotional confrontation with her that he erased the memory of the decision he made
and in the finale he is finally knocked down from all of the pegs he hangs on while he does a dick measuring contest with the president. morty loses respect for him, beth and jerry get back together, and now everyone in the family is keenly aware of how manipulative and awful rick is. they keep him around, but nobody is letting him act the way he does unchecked anymore
this bitch tries to ascend to godhood and ends up falling further down than where he was at the beginning. it's addictive to watch. best season.
#rick and morty#rnm#a lot of this post is inspired by the cj the x video but like. man cj the x rally hit the nail on the head fksnxjjf#so it bears repeating
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Fulfillment - Flufftober 19
Summary: Dean finally lives the life he deserves and dreamed of.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Wife!Reader
Side pairing: Sam Winchester x Eileen Leahy
Warnings: pregnancy, fluff, overprotective Dean, implied smut, cuddling & snuggling, Dean is a horny dog, a hint of dirty talk and dirty fantasy
Rating: Teen
Idea by: @elle14-blog1
Trope: Pregnancy
@warmandfluffybingocards: Square 16: Breakfast in bed
@anyfandomgoesbingo: Square 7: Decorating the nursery
Kinktober vs Flufftober 2023
Your last battle was the day Dean told you he loves you. He didn’t want to waste another moment without having you in his arms.
Chuck, or God if you want to call that jackass so, fell without glory.
Jack went to heaven, and Castiel accompanied him to make sure no one tried to abuse the young man’s powers ever again.
Since that day, you have been living a normal life.
While everyone else dreams of a more exciting life, you are happy to have a normal and boring life.
While you turned your back on the hunter’s life, you turned the bunker into a warm and cozy home. (We don’t talk about the room where Dean stored all the weapons.)
Only because you stopped hunting doesn’t mean Dean doesn’t act like an overprotective bodyguard when it comes to you. You’re his wife, the future mother of his children, and the reason to keep on going for him.
“Sweetheart,” Dean pokes his head inside the kitchen. “No…no!” He tuts. “I told you; I’m going to make breakfast.” Your husband watches you run one hand over your grown belly while stuffing a pickle into your mouth.
“I’m having cravings,” you chew audibly while your husband makes a fuss. He doesn’t want you to leave your bedroom or the bed. If it was up to Dean, he’d wrap you in a dozen blankets and never let you leave the bed again. “And no one is going to attack us here.”
“You don’t know that” your husband argues. He steps inside the kitchen and wraps his arms around you, making you groan. “I need to keep you safe and happy.”
“Last night you made me very happy.”
Dean snickers as he remembers the way you were writhing on his cock.
“I remember you were a begging mess, Y/N. Loud and naughty. Just the way I like you.”
“Dean, we can’t make out in the kitchen again. Sammy will kill us,” you whine as your husband kisses down your neck. “I mean it, baby. We can’t get caught again.”
“But getting caught is half the fun,” Dean laughs in your neck, making you giggle. “Alright. If you are a good girl and go to our bedroom to lie down, I’ll make you the best breakfast you ever ate. I promise it’s not my dick.”
“You’re lucky I love you, Mr. Winchester. You’re a very naughty man,” you chuckle as he whispers dirty nothings in your ear. “If you don’t want to end up getting caught by your brother and Eileen, we better go back to our bedroom.”
“Sex before breakfast. I knew you were the one…” He hums in your neck. “But after you’ll eat all the delicious things I’ll cook for you…”
“A red rose, and food, huh,” Sam watches his brother carry a tray filled with breakfast and a single red rose out of the kitchen. “Did you leave some food for us?”
“Sure, Sammy,” Dean grins. “My wife needs the food. I wore her out.”
Sam shakes his head. Sometimes his brother has no shame…or like ever. “Luckily she’s already pregnant or you’d get her pregnant.”
“Who says I won’t get her pregnant again?” Dean chuckles. “We are having twins. Next time, I’ll fill her with triplets.”
“What do you say? Will she like it?” Dean shows his brother and Eileen the U-shaped pregnancy pillow he got for you. He has it draped over his shoulder to show it to Sam. “It’s good for the babies and her, right?”
Eileen smirks as her brother-in-law excitedly tells them about all the things he bought for you and the babies.
“It’s nice of you to get the pillow,” she finally says. Dean looks adorable with all the stuffies tugged under his arm. “What do you want to do with the rest?” She questions.
“While Y/N is having a nap, I’m going to decorate the nursery. We are almost done, but she’s a little under the weather this week. I’ll finish it and show her everything when she feels better.”
“Do you need help?” Sam offers willingly. “We are going finish the nursery faster if we work together.”
“Are you sure, Sammy?”
Sam flashes his brother a smile. “Well, I’m counting on your help when we are having triplets…”
“I love the pillow,” Dean states as you and your husband lie on the bed, the pregnancy pillow wrapped around your bodies. “They were right. It’s perfect for snuggling and cuddling.”
You grin as Dean moves impossibly closer to hide his face in your neck. “I heard you finished the nursery.”
“Sammy and Eileen helped. If there’s something you do not like, blame Sammy.”
“I know that I’ll love it,” you mumble sleepily. “Just like I love you.”
“I love you too, sweetheart, and the little beans,” he whispers in your ear while moving one hand to your belly. “I’ll always protect you and our babies. Always.”
Tags in reblog.
#dean winchester#warmandfluffybingo#anyfandomgoesbingo#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester fanfiction#supernatural#Fulfillment - Flufftober 19#kinktober vs flufftober 2023#fem!reader#female reader
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Nononono. I love SG!ConstructProwl. Because consider in IDW Baseline he never accepted them truly and they left him.
In SG they are successful at wooing him.
Oooooh.
Concept.
In SG it is the Constructicons are medics. In BL, they forcibly converted Prowl because of orders and feel in love with his brain. In there's during the SG!ProwlOP divorce, they find him beaten and broken left to die, and having seen what he went through feel sick at the idea of leaving him, and his Spark case is compromised. So they temporarily hook him into their Gestalt system since it is made to accept others, but Prowl latches on to them and is utter enraptured by their loyalty and love. He knows it exists but feeling that kind of loyalty and naivete about being goodness in the world after everything he sees is charming and what's more he wants it. So they've been chosen by a feral sleazy cat/mean girl who is very much now "Optimus who?" and eyeing them up while they squeak and push at him with a broom especially since he refuses to break the bond and gives them sad cat eyes that they know–they can feel his think which is beautifully sharp and horrifically clear and calculating–it is fake but the thought of hurting him and echoed memory of rejections and beatings and not being enough that radiates at the spark of him makes them unable to let go.
Even more Prowl is more than rwady to go full ride or die and has decided to be their murderous "he said no pickles" girlfriend and torment them into not overworking themselves and glare at the Decepticons who ask for assistance or projects and make sure they eat and are fed and have a schedule. The Constructicons overextend themselves to support everyone and have issues saying no.
Prowl does not.
The Decepticons are horrified at the implication of taking advantage and Megatron finds himself agreeing with Prowl about them taking care of themselves while they get upset at first but reluctantly admit he's right.
"Of course I am." Is Prowl’s only response as he shoves cube of Energon flavored to each of their exact tastes and locks down their work stations (Soundwave conveniently distracts Shockwave so he can't help them hack back in) and shuffles them to berth.
Hm, I have thoughts now about Workaholic!SG!Constructicons and their small bossy new self-assigned wife.
Exactlyyyyyyy
In SG, they said "we may or may not be able to fix him but we can try"
Also yes yes on SG medic!constructicons.
Exactly, SG ProwlOp is a toxic relationship I can absolutely see happening as an on/off thing that's been going on since before the war but of course this is the final off switch.
They just have to save him, they've gotta. And they do. Prowl happens to latch on very tightly and does not want to let go lol
It is such the opposite of canon and now he's the one who is sticking close by, because he has felt Positive Emotions that do not come from someone else's Negative Emotions for the first time and he's hooked.
"Would you like me to kill that guy???"
"... No thank you, but it's the thought that counts?"
Yes I'm fiddling around with the constructicon's colors and I am so tempted to keep the purple and not the green
Awww yes and he is making sure they don't implode by being selfish for them (oddly selfless of him, but he'd deny that)
Sdfg yep yep he is their evil bastard they have adopted and he's bullying them into self carem
#maccadam#transformers#sg prowl#sg megatron#sg soundwave#sg shockwave#wavewave#oops! i guess since the tag is there I've gotta keep it#:3#constructiprowl#constructicons#sg optimus prime#prowlop#well past prowlop#idw prowl#transformers shattered glass
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Steve tries to find a comfortable position for his head on the backpack. Impossible, he’s anyway too wired up to care. His team has to hunker down and is forced to hide between scrub and under dense, low-hanging branches throughout the entire day. The sun’s rising. They missed their exfil window. Junior crawls soundlessly towards him, his face serious and calm.
„What’s up? Everyone okay?“
„Yeah, all good.“ Junior whispers.
„Then what’s with the face?“
„We should be on our way home by now. It would have been perfect. Right on time back home again for the candles and the cake.“
Steve cranes his neck and checks the sky. They‘re on enemy territory and do everything to stay invisible.
„You know in our line of duty nothing is predictable. We were supposed to have reserves training but we’re on a mission. It’s what we do.“
Junior leans against the big tree and starts to work systematically past the layers of his camouflage to grab something from a secret pocket. Steve watches how he pulls slowly and without a sound a card from under there.
„That’s not a map.“ Steve states and stares at the piece of paper.
„It’s for you.“ Junior hands him the card, leans forward and whispers fondly. „Happy birthday, brother.“
Steve wants to grin but frowns at Junior. „You wrote me a fucking birthday card and took it on the mission?“ Steve‘s voice is calm but filled with question marks.
Junior scoffs and gives him an eye roll. „No, moron, I didn’t write you a card but someone who knew your team might not make it back in time, wrote it for you and made me swear to give it to you.“
„Danny made you swear?“ Steve’s smile widens.
„He did and because I know it means a lot to him . . . here, take it. And before you say something about bringing private life to work. We’re forced to stay put for the next 12 hours. So—„
„So?“
„Read it. It’s from your husband. There's a Snickers in my pocket and a small candle but you‘ll get that when we’re on the plane.“
Steve takes the card, deeply moved, and fights against the upcoming emotions. It’s not wise to read it but on the other hand, they have to kill a lot of time. „Thank you.“
„Love you, man.“ Junior pushes his fist gently against Steve‘s shoulder. He turns around and settles into a comfortable position to sleep for a few hours. They can’t do anything but wait.
Steve sits up and holds the card between his hands. He can’t allow his feelings to break through entirely but he lets his fingers wander over the paper where Danny’s fingers have been when he wrote the card. He opens it. The text is short but means the world to him. And it says Danno. Steve knows exactly what Danny wants to tell him. They took in a stray cat and named him Mr. Pickles. Steve was so worried that Eddy might get stressed and that the cat might bolt again. Steve’s heart already belongs to the cat. Danny knows that and sends him a picture showing Eddy and Mr. Pickles eyeing each other with interest. And next to the other picture, Danny took of him and his fur boy there's a short note: I‘ll take care of your new love, babe. You’re a big softy and that’s why I love you.
„Love you, too Danno.“ Steve murmurs and shoves the card into a small pocket close to his heart, folded into a small square. He shuffles into a lying position and reaches over to touch Junior. „Thanks, brother. I needed that.“
#h50#steve‘s birthday#h50 march 10#steve mcgarrett#danny williams#mcdanno#Junior reigns#ficlet#mcdanno ficlet#unbeta'd#my edit
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