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sallytheseamstress · 3 years

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HAPPIESTPLACEHQ Task 2 - Sally Finkelstein

Playlist you feel best describes your character

Touch In Mine (fingers) - Esperanza Spalding “Touching surfaces every day Feeling no spark of tenderness within” Sally is a very sensitive person, both physically and emotionally: loud sounds, bright lights, strong smells can overwhelm her easily, as well as angry words and open displays of aggression. That is partly why she keeps to herself, to her routines, to her little comfortable bubble; but as she has become older, Sally finds that this existence is now wearing her down, and has come to realize that, even with the friendship of Jack (who is so often locked up in his own world as well) and Zero (who, much like her, keeps to himself), she craves affection and love that, so far, hasn’t experienced neither from family nor friends.

Like Someone In Love - Björk “Each time I look at you, I'm limp as a glove And feeling like someone in love” Just a little love song that very accurately depicts Sally’s sort of clumsiness towards her own feelings, and how she feels she could express them towards a loved one. It is a beautiful, if rather awkward, way to feel for her, one that sticks to her mind and heart and colors her world, filling her with conflicting emotions -giddiness of being lovestruck, fear of being found out, sadness at the inevitability of vulnerability, hopefulness at the chance of being requited.

Your Woman - White Town “Now I know your heart, I know your mind You don't even know you're being unkind So much for all your highbrow Marxist ways Just use me up and then you walk away Boy, you can't play me that way” Even though this is a break up song between a romantic couple, this could very well reflect Sally and her father’s codependent relationship. With no family beyond him, no other place to go and with her low-paying job, Sally is basically dependent on her father for everything; and, similarly, her father, being in a wheelchair and stubbornly determined on never leaving Redwood Hollow, depends on Sally for everything he cannot do himself. Sally does recognize her father’s brilliant mind, his cultured thoughts, his well-read expertise and knowledge, but even though he spouts a philosophy of mutual aid, of small-town solidarity and community that he passed down to his daughter, Sally knows deep down this is pure bull -when he himself seems to regard her as a slave, something he owns and is in his right to mistreat, withholding any sort of affection or praise or kindness, treating her more like a robot than as a child.

Glory Box - Portishead “Sow a little tenderness No matter if you cry Give me a reason to love you Give me a reason to be a woman I just wanna be a woman” Going back to the first song, what Sally wants most is affection, and that means vulnerability both from her part and from whom the affection comes from. Since she was very little she has learned to keep her emotions in check, not asking for much, never be a nuisance. This has also led to her feeling somehow disconnected from her own self, from her gender and age, as well as from society at large. Now that she has arrived to her thirties, Sally feels like she needs to break out of this subservient position she has been chained to, and that means, in part, reclaiming her own self as a person with autonomy, as someone capable of and deserving of love, and as a woman with the capacity to socialize with others, to be nurturing, to be affectionate; and, as well, partly resenting her status as a woman as someone who needs to fulfill that nurturing role, to provide for her father, to cook and clean and do the domestic chores.

Sounds Of Blue - Morcheeba “A sort of stoned silence Sat on that boat floating out The waters left me open All my emotions fog my lenses” Despite acknowledging her own sensitiveness, Sally isn’t very good with emotions; she knows the basics of comforting, to leave her shoulder free for someone else to cry on, to be available and listen to someone in need; but she is awful at managing her own frustrations and despair, choosing instead to bottle it all. Sometimes, it can feel almost asphyxiating, to be so full with words she can’t pronounce, with nowhere to pour them. This often makes Sally feel even more alone, like a boat in the middle of the ocean. As she grows older, though, she has begun to try her best and be mindful of what she feels; instead of simply allowing the emotions to overwhelm her, Sally tries to question them, to dive deeper and find the root cause, even if that means giving in and having to have a good long cry about it.

Walking In The Rain - The Ronettes “When he's near me, I'll kiss him And when he leaves me, woah, oh, oh, I'll miss him Though sometimes we'll fight, I won't really care And I'll know it's gonna be alright 'cause we've got so much we share” Sally would like to think of herself as the practical sort; but, of course, this doesn’t mean she has a romantic side as well. Being raised by her father, homeschooled, with no distraction beyond books and constantly monitored TV watching, she grew up during her teens with a strong idea of what true love is like: it is instant, it is irresistible, it is everlasting, it is passionate, it is destined... As an adult, she knows this isn’t realistic at all (especially having witnessed, from a distance, the romantic troubles of the rest of the town); but a part of her still wishes she could be whisked away by a prince, somewhere far away, to an idyllic world of tenderness and freedom.

Good Morning Heartache - Billie Holiday “Stop haunting me now Can't shake you, no how Just leave me alone I've got those Monday blues Straight through Sunday blues” Kind of a byproduct of her buried-deep-down idealizations of love, and her repressed emotions and expectations, the weight of Sally’s loneliness can sometimes pull her down to periods of depression. As a full-time worker, both as her father’s caretaker and in her work at Jack’s Attic and in the Community Events Committee, Sally often has to put on a happy face to deal with the daily grind; but, once she has some time alone, she either tries to keep herself distracted, or gives in to that despair for as long as she can allow herself to.

Les Fleurs - Minnie Riperton “For all of these simple things and much more, a flower was born It blooms to spread love and joy, faith and hope to people forlorn” Most of all, Sally feels most comfortable in nature: as at home as she is in her own house, it also feels, increasingly so, as a place of repression, lack of change, and constant surveillance. Nature, especially Redwood Park and the surrounding woodland, feels to Sally as the place where change is required, where it is most clear, where it is most, well, natural. Whether it is a rainy day with the air thick with humidity and the tension of a coming thunderstorm, a sunny afternoon having a small picnic at the shade of a tree in full bloom, or a lovely, glittering snow morning, snowflakes falling quietly and magically from a cotton-clouded sky, Sally loves it when she can be outside, forget about her responsabilities and duties, and focus on the sensation of the world, the real world, around her.

Day Dreaming - Aretha Franklin “He's the kind of guy that would say Hey, baby, let's get away Let's go some place, huh Where I don't care” This is also a continuation of her own ongoing matureness and acknowledging of how she tends to idealize the idea of love. Sally tries her best to reject her old teenage conception of a prince coming to sweep her off her feet, but at the same time, especially when she can allow herself some time to doze off and daydream, she still nurses that little hope that, whoever it is that will come along and give her the affection she wants so bad, will wish, just as she does, to explore the world beyond Redwood -it doesn’t matter where, since they would be together, mutually helping each other in their struggles, loving and trusting each other, and that would be everything they would need.

Please Don’t Make Me Cry - Lianne La Havas “I'll try to let it go, my fingers are crossed I show you my pretty scars, they make us whatever we are” Sally knows fully well that she comes with a good deal of issues, and that’s what scares her most when considering pursuing a romantic relationship. She is, however, aware enough of her traumas that she feels she could be honest about it -of course, as long as she manages to not let herself be drowned by them. Honesty is a very important quality for her. The only problem, then, is that while Sally truly wants to confess just how much she feels what has happened to her, she is still afraid to intimidate someone else, to be seen as “high-maintenance”, as someone hard to love. Once more, while love is her goal, vulnerability is her greatest fear.

#sally finkelstein #happiestplacetask #happiestplacetask2 #. HEADCANONS { try as i may it doesn’t last }#. TUNES { i sense there’s something in the wind }

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archeiafaith · 3 years

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Merry Christmas from Sam and Dean!

Sam and Dean Go to the Christmas Diner

A One-shot Holiday fanfic for all your jolly needs, I hope you enjoy and Happy Holidays to you all!

When Sam came out of the bathroom, Dean was already dressed for the day advertising his not-so-surprising plaid shirt and white undershirt (they go hand in hand). “Hey, there is a local diner not too far from here. Want to catch some breakfast?” Dean asked.

Sam reluctantly agreed, and that’s why he found himself walking up to a small, antique-looking diner with his brother in tow. The outside of the diner was white with red streaks aligning the top and the bottom rim of the restaurant, while the front of the building had a big, neon red sign displaying the name of the diner which read, ‘The Shaky Shack.’ A bit of an odd name, Sam thought.

Christmas was around the corner, only a few weeks away, so the entire diner was decorated in a plethora of Holiday spirit. Candy-colored lights aligned the roof and outer edge of the building, creating the perfect loop. The windows were decorated with painted reindeer, elves, mistletoe, and Santa himself sitting in an extravagant sleigh.

The second the brothers entered the restaurant, the smell of hot chocolate and peppermint wafted through their noses. The jukebox in the corner blasted ‘Rocking Around the Christmas Tree,’ and the waitresses were wearing Christmas themed uniforms decked out in red and green.

Sam and Dean passed the bar top and walked over to the booths in the back near the Christmas tree surrounded by colorful, wrapped presents.

“Wow, now all they need is the big man himself handing out candy canes and this place would be perfect,” Dean announced sarcastically as he took a seat across from Sam in the red patent leather booth.

Sam smirked at his comment and took a moment to really take in his scenery. Dean was right, Sam thought this place was a bit overzealous when it came to the Holidays, but Sam also saw it as refreshing and charming.

While the brothers awaited their server, Sam decided to confront Dean about the whereabouts of their vacation destination, “So, Dean, where precisely are we going? You didn’t exactly leave me much to go on. All you said was that we were heading north and that I should ‘Stop bothering me about it, Sammy. Just drop it,’” Sam imitated his brother by exaggerating his words, acting childish.

“Real mature Sam,” Dean responded by simply nodding his head and stretching his arms across the booth’s seat, “sorry to break it to you buddy, but I’m not telling you anything.”

“Why not?” Sam asked harshly. Dean was bothering him with all this mystery. Sam’s eyebrows began to crease over his sullen hazel eyes.

“Because Sammy boy, that would ruin the surprise and illusion of this wonderful adventure I have in store for us,” Dean said confidently. His attention then turned to look for their server, his head scanned the diner from left to right.

The restaurant was moderately busy, most of the customers being senior citizens, with the offset of a young couple. Dean noticed a cute, young woman sitting a couple of booths ahead of them all by her lonesome; she looked up and caught Dean looking her over and he smoldered at her as a response. The blonde woman immediately looked away blushing.

“Hello, earth to Dean. Could you please stop ogling poor girls, and come back to the conversation at hand,” said Sam snapping his fingers in front of Dean’s face.

Dean smacked Sam’s hand away and turned his attention back to his brother’s stupid face, “Hey, don’t get pissy with me just because you have no game.”

Sam rolled his eyes and was about to rebuttal a response when their waitress arrived. Their waitress was a short, stockier woman with stringy, ashen colored hair all tied up into a messy bun. She looked to be in her late fifties, and she had on classic, ruby red lipstick with a pair of glasses that sat upon the tip of her nose. Sam looked to her ornament themed name tag that had the name ‘Mira’ printed in an elusive, cursive print.

“I apologize for the wait boys, my name is Mira and I’ll be taking care of you today,” her voice was rough and sounded as if she had been smoking for the past thirty years. “happy holidays! It’s such a wonderful time to spend with your loved ones. So are we celebrating anything special? Maybe an anniversary?” Mira asked smiling at the two of them, insinuating them to be a couple themselves.

“Oh God no,” Dean started shaking his head side to side vigorously, “we’re just brothers.”

Sam agreed by smiling awkwardly and muttered a small, “Yeah.”

“Really? My, my, I am so sorry. That is my mistake, you look the type is all,” Mira responded by avoiding eye contact, and she grabbed her notepad out of her red apron that was tied around her waist. “Well then, what can I get for you two brothers?” She asked.

“I’ll start,” Dean began by flipping to the breakfast side of the menu, “I’ll take your Simply Eggtravagant deluxe with an extra side order of bacon, please. And coffee, black. Oh, and do you happen to have any specials going on like, I don’t know, pie for instance, ”Dean finished his order by longingly looking at their server. Sam thought Dean looked like a four-year-old who was about to get his new, favorite toy for Christmas.

“Sorry son, we are fresh out of pies this morning. Old Billy over there,” Mira said pointing to an elderly gentleman asleep on the bar top with his head sitting in his breakfast, “he ordered all the pie we had in stock and ate them all at once! He was trying to prove that he used to be a professional eater in his prime, ” she laughed, ”of course, all the boys of the joint bet that he couldn’t even finish one pie by himself. And well, you know the rest.”

“That was quite an intriguing story, Miss. I’ll be sure to remember that as I’m NOT enjoying my very-deserved pie,” Dean stated, annoyance edged every word he spoke, his eyes were as sharp as knives.

Mira looked taken aback; her mouth opened and closed for not having the words of what to say next.

“I-I think my brother was just joking,” Sam jumped in trying to ease the situation, “he is such a kidder. We can’t keep this guy from cracking the big ones,” Sam laughed awkwardly. Sam could tell that what he said didn’t help at all, since both Mira and Dean were looking at him as if he suddenly grew a tail and turned into a donkey.

“I’ll just uhm,” Sam coughed, “take the number two with a coffee, please,” Sam finished his order scratching his cheek. He figured it was best to just move this along as fast as possible.

The waitress leisurely took down their orders and grabbed their menus. She smiled half-heartedly and walked away without saying a word.

“That was awkward,” Dean said after a minute of silence.

“Uhh, yeah I would say so Dean,” Sam said frustrated, “what the hell was that all about? You were so rude and she didn’t deserve that at all. Why do you always insist on purging your baggage for everyone around you? Honestly, Dean, you’re starting to act irrationally,” Sam looked at Dean with his somber, determined eyes the whole speech. It left Dean no choice, but to stare and listen.

“Whoa, you mind taking it down a notch, Betsy? You have been up in my ass all day and I have had it up to here, ” Dean motioned his left arm up over his head and used his hand as a makeshift bar, ”when you're in pain with your weird visions, I get that. But, Sam lately you've been throwing these tantrums every damn day and I honestly don't want to deal with it anymore. This time is precious, vacation time, prime time, MY time.” Dean paused to close his eyes and exhaled through his nose, ”Now I haven't been able to get any proper sleep, ” he continued his voice rising with every syllable, ”I have you breathing down my neck every second, let's not forget who we had to cremate last, and now this freaking lady!” Dean nods in the direction of their waitress, ”tells me that I can't have any pie! When you know that was the whole reason I wanted to come to this diner in the first place!” Dean finished exhaustedly sitting back into his seat.

The whole diner went silent, even the jukebox had stopped playing ending with a loud record scratch. All eyes were on the two brothers sitting in the back booth. Sam looked at the other patrons and simply gestured a small wave, he gave a tense smile and a nod as a response to their piercing on looking.

At that moment Mira came over carrying their drinks and food on one large tray. She wobbled as she walked and she shakily placed the tray onto a nearby table. She grabbed the two coffees and placed them in front of both Sam and Dean, the creamers coming right after in the middle of the table.

”The Simply Eggtravagant deluxe, ” Mira said, holding Dean’s meal with both palms. She was having a little trouble holding on due to how large the serving was. Mira placed his meal down in front of him and went straight for his side order of bacon.

”Wow, I'm impressed. That was fast, questionably fast, ” Dean questioned while rubbing his chin. He smiled when the elderly waitress placed the entirety of his meal in front of him. Food will always be a cure to Dean’s grumpiness, Sam wished Dean could have gotten his pie too.

”Hmm? Yes, son, speed is what we are known for, ” Mira responded and pointed to a wooden sign displaying the words, ‘It’s better than fast food, its Diner food,’ written in a bold print.

Mira finished passing out their meals and gave a polite curtsy while wiping her hands on her apron. ”Enjoy your meal boys, give me a holler if you need anything else, ” she said while walking away.

At this point, the rest of the restaurant went back to their own private conversations, most of them discussing the mere recent event amongst each other.

Dean immediately stuffed his face with every piece of food he could muster. He ate ravenously going from food to drink simultaneously, his cheeks constantly bloated. Sam stared at Dean with a look of disgust, the younger of the two yet to have touched his food.

Dean looked up at Sam’s gaping, with his fork at the ready, “What? I’m hungry,” Dean stated matter of factly, his mouth too full to speak properly.

Sam blinked away from the scene in front of him and tried to focus on his own meal. Hesitantly, he began to sip from his coffee and then progressed to nibble on his eggs and hash browns; Sam wasn’t very hungry nowadays.

Dean hasn’t spoken a word yet; his focus was completely on the food in front of him. He would hum happily here and there after taking a particularly delicious bite. At the rate Dean was eating, he finished rather quickly, but not surprisingly. Dean smiled teeth and all while he happily rubbed his belly, “Man, I needed that,” Dean said, satisfied with a burp, leaning back into his seat.

Sam indifferently took another small bite of his eggs and placed his fork down. He covered the rest of his food with a napkin, indicating that he was finished.

“That’s it? That’s all you’re eating? Come on Sam, you can do better than that,” Dean encouraged pushing Sam’s plate closer to his side of the table.

“No thanks, I had enough. I’m full,” Sam shrugged his shoulders and looked away.

Dean noticed this as Sam’s usual response to most things lately. “Okay, well, I think you should at least take the rest with you. Maybe you’ll get hungry later,” said Dean already motioning toward their waitress to grab her attention.

“No, wait, Dean, it’s okay really. I don’t want to take it home, it would only go to waste. Just leave it, please?” Sam pleaded to him and looked at Dean sincerely.

I’ll drop it, for now, Dean thought.

Sam and Dean decided it was time to leave and proceeded to shuffle out of their booth. They passed the other customers, Dean walking confidently with his head up high. While Sam was walking a few steps behind Dean, slouching his shoulders, almost as if he was trying to hide inside himself.

Dean walked by the booth with the cute, blonde woman he saw earlier. He noticed she was now accompanied by another gentleman sitting across from her. This didn’t seem to faze Dean as he continued his stride and winked at the woman as he passed down her aisle. She blushed again and looked down, her male company eyeballed the back of Dean’s head as he passed.

Sam was a witness to the whole scene and awkwardly shuffled past the couples’ booth with a side glance. He rushed up a couple of steps, so he would catch up with Dean.

They both walked up to the cashier near the front doors, paid their bill, got back into their Chevy Impala, and drove off.

**This is part of a larger fanfiction story called Sam and Dean Take A Vacation

Check it out on Wattpad:)** (link in chat)

#spn #cwsupernatural #dean winchester #deanedit #destiel #sam winchester #supernatural #supernatural christmas #spn christmas #christmas #samedit #supernatural fanfiction #samanddeantakeavacation #tav #archeiafaith #faithedit #deancas #dean #spnedit

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fightevilandthengetblownup · 4 years

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FIC: Look Through My Eyes (kidverse)

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"Come on now, Billyboy, time for bed." Her voice still sounded so foreign to him - a mature and calming woman's voice rather than the girlish chirp he had heard calling out her farewells to him that last morning - and watching as his little Joanna stumblingly rose from the creaking wooden chair beside him to try to talk the usually boisterous boy to bed, Bill couldn't help but smile. Watching mother and son reminded him of his wife and daughter when she was a tiny blonde bundle of waning energy, yawning as loudly and widely as his grandson was now. "Gotsta brush our teeth, and then read another chapter of Mommy's book before bed."

"I don't wantta-" "Baby boy, Mommy's tired and won't be able-" "No! I wantta stay wit' Daddy 'nd Grandda Bill!" "Billy, please don't-" "No!"

"Billy-" The other man's voice cut over the shrill cry of their child, Grey's usually loving look for the little boy was stern and firm in a way that Bill remembered from his times shutting down Jo's cries to stay up on his knee. "If you don't go with your mommy now, you won't be allowed to read your story before bed and there will be no pancakes in the morning."

The look of utter shock that spread across the little boy's face was mirrored on his mother's - Jo and Billy both staring in abject horror towards the serious look on the other's face - before Billy was up on his feet and rushing, tripping here and there on his feet, out the kitchen towards the hall. Jo's look of shock slowly melted as Bill saw Grey's look soften into an amused smile.

"Oh, that was just mean, hun." "Don't worry Jo, I wasn't going to actually take your pancakes away." "You better not've!" "Jo... You better get up there before he floods the bathroom again." "Oh shit!"

Jo's responses and the almost fluid dance of their back and forth was somewhat a soothing sound to Bill's ears as he'd leaned into his hand watching his daughter in her new life. It reminded him of home. Or perhaps that was just the drinks talking. The five Scotch's and five beers in that he'd lulled that loud, screaming voice inside that hated the time he'd missed, the time he'd been missed, and the monster that sat across the table from him filling that gaping void for his little girl in so many ways that Bill left behind.

He watched, eyes heavy and filled with that other part of him - the part that was so happy for his little girl's happiness and safety, as Jo waddled around the edge of the table to press a kiss against the other man's cheek gently before that megawatt smile was directed his way. Bill was slow responding in kind but knew from the way those chocolate brown eyes glistened slightly in the dim lighting of her kitchen that Jo saw it before she slowly made her way out the door and the heavy footfalls of her swollen, pregnancy feet upon the creaky staircase. It was something that Bill remembered from her own incubation period, how Ellen had complained ad nauseam about the swelling and how much her feet hurt and how he had rubbed them until his thumbs felt numb each evening once the bar had closed.

"She'll be back down after she's put Billy to bed." The shadow across from him broke him out of his pensive silence, drawing his attention from the empty doorway and across to that almost calm exterior that Bill could tell was put on for him. "Jo's been having more trouble sleeping at night lately-"

“Oh?” No matter how many drinks he’d had at that point, the hunter couldn’t keep the confrontational tone out of his voice as he was left alone with the monster again. It was one thing to see the soft smiles and loving stares between his daughter and the shadow, and another to spend time himself alone with the thing that should usually be on the other end of a gun barrel rather than the other side of a kitchen table. “You haven’t been botherin’ her have you? Women might get crazy, but they need rest more than anything at this point.”

The range of colors that spread across the other’s face - from a paling to bright red and back to a deep pink - were bemusing an in abstract way, as the dark haired man fiddled with his nails for a moment before it settled into a firm, blank look despite the clipped tone of his voice. “I always encourage Jo to get enough rest. She definitely needs it.”

It was a struggle to keep the desire to chuckle under wraps as he picked up and drank slowly from his beer instead. Bill tried to refrain from making a face himself as he set the beer down again. Somehow his daughter remembered his favorite brand after all these years, but the taste was something completely wrong from how it tasted before. Just another shift to how things had changed beyond recognition, Bill guessed.

“Is that alright?” Grey’s voice cut across his thoughts, and looking across at the other man with his soda and the gesture towards his own beer, Bill found himself frowning slightly. “You made a face.”

“Tastes wrong,” He grumbled the words out quietly as he toyed with the neck again. Everything tasted that little bit wrong to him - except the few home cooked meals around that very kitchen table. Everything was a little bit too sweet, too artificial, too different to how things tasted before. Bill felt himself scowling further as the intrusive thought that everything was different to before he died. “Not her fault, but it’s not quite the same.”

There was a strange noise from the other man, and glancing up, Bill felt the frown deepening to himself as he noticed the shadow nodding understandingly. “Ah, yeah. I would imagine you are going through a bit of a culture shock.”

“That’s... an interestin’ choice of words.” “Heh, that too must be one, huh?” “Perhaps.”

“Well, if it’s any comfort - you will probably adjust alright,” Grey’s look wasn’t cold or unfriendly, but there was a strangeness to his tone that the hunter struggled to identify at that moment. “It took me a few months to get a handle on things, and you’ve got the bonus of having already lived in the world before.”

His brow rose quickly as the realisation what the tone was - empathy and self-deprication - as well as the fact that the monster disguised in human clothing across from him was seemingly reminding him of that fact. Bill felt his grip tighten on the neck of his beer as he shifted his weight carefully, not enough to alert the other but enough to be ready to spring into action and defense if needed. “You mean the bonus of my bein’ human, don’t play coy.”

The other’s look swiftly shifted through a myriad of emotions and flushed pink by the end as he seemed to shrink back in his seat for a moment before the unsurprisingly squaring of his shoulders. Grey’s voice was quiet as he responded, and Bill had to refrain from smirking at the wary look in those blue eyes. “I don’t play coy or pretend I’m not what I am.”

“No?” “No, I don’t.” “Sure doesn’t seem like you don’t.” “Well, I can assure you - even if it may seem like I don’t acknowledge it, I always know what I am.”

“Does my daughter?” The words growled out, deep and low, as he pinned back those earnest and wide eyes with the cold steel of his own. “Because she’s definitely-”

“Your daughter is the closest thing this world has ever seen to perfection, Mr Harvelle,” The other man’s tone was just as low, and was somehow dripping with both acidic venom at Bill’s question and affection as he spoke about the woman upstairs helping their son through his bedtime routine. “She is kind and compassionate and sees the best in everyone and everything. That doesn’t mean she isn’t aware of what is true.”

Bill found himself staring down the other, gazes locked and battling in a way that the other man had yet to interject himself against him before now. He’d almost thought the monster was a push over, or rather, worse, that he was a snake in the grass hiding fangs behind a smile and deference. Staring him down, Bill thought that second assessment may be right after all, even if he seemed unwilling to strike. The words were sweet to hear, but there was also a danger in them, and refusing to back down from the battle engaging, he waited the other man out until the shadow finally dropped his gaze with a sigh.

“Look, I’m aware that you are not likely happy with how things appear to be, but-”

“Hey, hunny,” The cheerful voice came down the hallway, clear and loud, interrupting and silencing the other man’s words like a clap of lightening. “Billy wanted you to come up and promise he would still have his pancakes in the mornin’.”

The look of affection that crossed the shadow’s face was unsettling familiar as Bill could hear the echo of Ellen calling him back to tuck in his daughter even for a second before he left, before the other man pushed himself to his feet. Grey looked back at him from his intended path for a moment, before pausing. “Did you need anything before I go up?”

“I’m fine.” “Well, feel free to help yourself to anything you might need-” “I’m fine.”

“Right...” The blink was strange, and Bill almost felt compelled to ask why the other man looked at him so strangely right then, before a call down of the other’s name from the stairs caught his attention again and he headed out of the kitchen. Clearly the man knew better than to leave a tired, pregnant woman waiting.

Shifting in his seat and taking another sip of his beer, Bill found himself looking about the space in a way he’d not really had the chance to do so before now. It was peculiar to be in such a domestic space but know that it housed not only a monster but a hunter too. Potentially two hunters, if the somewhat hinted idea that had slipped out when his girl had mentioned how happy she was to spend time with him again.

The window above the sink had an old, faded lacey curtain that had bundles herbs that he recognised from hex bags drying tied to it. The counter tops were clearly well used and well loved, but the small amounts of clutter with a sunflower shaped ceramic vase filled with wooden utensils by the stove and a cookie jar in the other corner shaped like some kind of phone box was surrounded by a few sippy cups that Bill had seen his namesake walking about with regularly and another smaller cookie jar shaped like a dogs head that had the name ‘Nana’ written on the collar. The dishes from dinner - a risotto that Bill had enjoyed immensely even if he had chewed thoughtfully as he considered the man that had cooked it - were either soaking in the sink or drying in the drip tray with bright floral tea towels thrown over the top. The lower cabinets were covered in bright patterns of different vinyl wrapping, and the odd scratching of what looked like a crayon had once rubbed over there and the cleaning process had faded it out.

The fridge itself was a whole other matter - covered from top to bottom with different papers and magnets. There was a shopping list obviously, and another list that Bill found himself reading as he stood up to see the list of locations and hunts beside the shopping. Sipping his beer as he ran a finger over just how many were far away as well as the proportion that were barely an hours drive away seemed to divide the work for the couple. Another piece of paper Bill remembered from his own cheatsheet back in the day - a list of aliases and which government agency it connected to - that connected to the array of phones that were on the wall near the back door. The rest of the fridge was covered in coupons and take away menus, sketches that betrayed a talented hand and then large colorful drawings that were clearly made by the youngster of the house. It was the fridge of a family, and running his finger over the top of the hunting list - rugaru, Dallas Texas, Sierra Crawford, August 18th bday - Bill sculled the last of his beer as he let that thought ruminate.

Tossing the glass into the recycling bin out the back door before locking back up again, the hunter moved around to look closer at some of the drawings clearly colored in and decorated by the little boy of the house and likely drawn originally by the monster when there was a quiet cough that caught his attention.

“Uh, Billy wanted to know if you were going to come up and say goodnight.” The shadow was standing in the doorway, looking a tad uncertain. “I wasn’t-”

“Show the way,” Bill interrupted quickly, standing straight and moving around the kitchen towards the shorter man.

Following up the stairs past the worn wallpapered walls hidden behind framed artworks here and there, Bill was surprised by how cramped the space seemed to be upstairs though it shouldn’t have. Downstairs wasn’t big enough for a family of three, let alone one soon to be four, and upstairs was much the same. One doorway he could spot a bathroom in, and another must have been the master bedroom. Right by the stair landing next to the railing was a door painted bright blue with the name ‘Billy’ elegantly painted on it and through which the warm light of a bedside lamp’s glow coming out.

As he moved through the doorway, the hunter was hit with a sense of wonderment seeing the little blond boy tucked into his bed - his tiny head resting on the red and black webbed pillowcase, mouth slightly open as he seemed to breathe gently - fast asleep already. Next to him, slightly cramped but equally asleep, was the other blonde, book slumped against her stomach and her head resting beside her son’s, mouth open but brows furrowed and eyes scrunching as if plagued by some fear even in her dreams.

“Oh. I guess we’re a bit late.” Grey’s voice was quiet, and Bill gave a quick glance over his shoulder at the other man, frowning to himself at the look on his face. It was something Bill knew so well himself. “I should wake Jo-”

“Nah, let her sleep.” Shaking his head, the hunter padded quietly into the room. Kneeling down beside the bed, he gently brushed back the little boy’s hair. Billy’s eyes fluttered open for a second and he let out a confused noise as Bill held his finger to his lip quieting him. “Shh buddy, your momma’s asleep.”

“We din’t finish-” “Did she stop mid story?” “Ye-uh-up.” “Well, she’ll just have to start again tomorrow night, won’t she?” “Mommy always falls -uuh- sleep.”

Bill smiled softly at the way the boy fought through his own yawns, eyes getting heavy and his lids drooping as he struggled to stay awake. Stroking his hand through his hair still, the hunter nodded and tweaked at his grandson’s nose. “Well, you should get to sleep now and maybe I’ll read it for you tomorrow night instead, okay?”

“M’okay Grandda.” Billy’s voice was soft and trailed off as he seemed to snuggle in deeper into his pillow, curling into his mother’s warmth as Bill moved his hand back. It was so like putting his daughter to sleep with a promise of stories and her brown eyes like melted chocolate as she’d fall asleep mid word.

Moving his hand over to the other blonde’s hair, tucking a strand behind her ear gently, Bill didn’t fight the impulse to lean in to press a kiss to her forehead like he used to. Rising from his knee slowly, he clicked the bedside lamp off, and was not surprised to see tiny, glow-in-the-dark stars glowing from the ceiling in the darkened room so like the little girl’s room he’d spent hours decorating with constellations - one selection of stars spelling out the little boys name across a corner that Bill was sure the boy would only notice in a few more years.

Almost closing the door behind him, leaving it slightly ajar so the light from the stairs would be viewable from inside should either wake up, Bill found the shadow was standing a few feet back and giving him plenty of space. There was a silent exchange that he found himself surprised to partake in - an eyebrow raise, a hand jerk, a shoulder shrugged and a head nod - before the pair moved downstairs and after a seconds pause from the shadow leading the way, into the front lounge room and away from where any noise of their talking may disrupt the sleeping pair upstairs.

Bill followed the gestured hand to sink into one of the comfy, worn leather arm chairs before the other man appeared to frown to himself.

“Did you want another beer or a scotch, Mr Harvelle?” The shadow’s voice was friendly, and the cautiously optimistic look he was received as he settled into the comfortable embrace of the couch was amusing.

Bill nodded his head, before letting out a quiet chuckle as the slightly frustrated look that cross the dark-haired man’s face. “One’a both. I figure I promised Billy I’d be ‘ere for bedtime tomorrow, and Jo suggested I stay the night.”

“Right, of course, she’s very smart like that.” Grey bobbed his head a few times before turning around and heading to the kitchen. It was barely a minute before he returned with a bottle and glass in one hand and a glass in the other. “Hopefully the scotch hasn’t changed any.”

He found himself laughing at that, shaking his head slightly as he took the drinks off the other to take a swig from the beer. “They’ve been the same for hundreds of years. Some thirty isn’t goin’ to change those at least.”

“That’s true.” Grey replied with a warmth in his own tone, smiling as he sat on the couch nearby but not too close. Always keeping a polite distance away, Bill had noticed, and swirling his drink in a deceptive way to appear intentional and to be drank but without the likelihood he would drink any significantly until Bill himself had touched his own. A move the blond hunter was familiar with when interviewing victims friends and relatives, as well as watching his wife do the same behind the bar to create a sense of security and friendship. Biting down a smirk watching the liquid swirling, he was caught off guard by the other man’s question. “Have you been settling into, well, the twenty-first century well? Other than the beers, I mean.”

“That’sa hell of a loaded question,” Bill found himself sighing as he sank back, taking a longer drink from his beer for a moment as he considered his answer. Glancing towards the door to the hallway and certain he was unlikely to be overheard by anyone else, before he let out another, heavier sigh. “It’s strange, supernatural even, to be alive now and so much changed.”

“Oh?” The curious but gentle noise was non-disruptive, and catching the other man’s eye as he let out the noise, Bill found himself tipping his head back and finishing his beer in a few quick swallows under the watchful eyes of the other. “What-”

“My Jo - my darlin’ girl - was barely as high as my hip when I saw her last before. She was all knobby knees and loose teeth, and my girl was on the cusp of growin’ up but not there yet,” He felt the words bobbing across his mind and out of his lips as he thought them, the vision of his little girl running up to hug around his legs and begging him not to go this time with her ‘Uncle’ John but he didn’t listen, before he could even think about editing them. Glancing across at the other, Bill saw a fellow father and a dark shadow of understanding growing in the other’s eyes as he spoke, and felt the heavy weight of holding these thoughts inside over the last few months deep in his bones. “That was the daughter I’ve always known, and was lookin’ forward to watchin’ grow into the amazing, beautiful and incredible woman that she seems to be now.” Leaning forward over his knees, resting his head in his hands with a shaky breath, Bill shook his head sharply as he whispered, “I was supposed ta be hunched over and handing my bike keys to her, not sharin’ them with her.”

There was a silence in the room, letting the words settle like dust but it didn’t bother Bill at all that the other didn’t speak. It wasn’t as if he’d understand the gut wrenching loss that he’d felt upon seeing that bright smile all grown up without gaps in her teeth. It wasn’t like Grey would get that Bill lost one daughter and gained a different one in so many ways, and just how little time he’d had to adjust to and adapt to that feeling when he could still wrap his arms around the new version of her.

Bill found himself sighing wornly as he looked up after the long drawn out silence between them, hazel meeting blue, and the hunter felt the weight of opening up firmly on his shoulders then. Shrugging one sharply, a jerky motion, he tried to press himself out of that melancholic thought process with a shove. “I don’t mean-”

“I understand your feelings, Mr. Harvelle. I know you wouldn’t expect it, but I do.” The other’s voice was calm and controlled, his face betraying very little other than sympathy as he took a small sip of his drink.

“Yeah right.” “I do. I understand that loss too.” “Oh?”

“I’ve lost a daughter myself.” The words were like an electric cattle prod, sharp and shooting a pained jolt along his spine as the shadow spoke, and Bill found himself jerking in his seat rather than slumping further. Grey’s eyes caught his worriedly for a second before he continued when it was clear Bill was caught listening and not about to move further. “Before we had Billy, that is. I had a daughter, she was so beautiful and my world for that time I was with her-”

“Jo los-”

“No! No, no. She wasn’t Jo’s, we weren’t together then,” Grey jerked sharply himself, eyes wide and shocked at the connection Bill had made. Bill’s heart slowed from the jerky racing at imagining his poor daughter having had to live with that loss as well, and it wasn’t until both men had let out a relieved sigh that the other continued, eyes slightly wet and glossy as he talked. “She... My daughter didn’t get to that big - she barely had any time at all, and I had barely any with her - but I can understand so truly that loss you... you must be feeling.” The shadow’s voice quivered over a few words, and if Bill had been a different man he might have pulled back at seeing the fall of tears along the other’s cheeks. But the sorrowful look in the other’s eyes wasn’t anything to pull back from, and Bill found himself swallowing thickly on the lump building in his throat. “I won’t say... I would never say you were lucky to have as long as you did with her, with your daughter, but I will say I’d give anything to be able to have any version of my... my Gwen back the way you do your Jo.”

Bill found himself nodding - in thanks, in understanding, in appreciation - at the other man’s words and the deliberacy of them. He was right, in many ways, and the hunter found himself reaching for his scotch with a shaky breath as he glanced away to give the other a fragment of privacy to compose himself. It was a shock to hear this, and he knew he’d had a lot of questions about it one day but now wasn’t the time. Now was the time to toss back his head and swallow the three fingers of liquor with a burning ache that rushed down his throat as if burning away the words he’d managed to say so far - leaving the pathway free for something else to bubble up if it did.

Setting the glass down on the coffee table with a sigh, Bill was surprised to find himself to have his other hand reach over to rest on the other man’s shoulder for a second before he with drew it. The other might be something he hated, something he hunted and killed and struggled to see past, but the moment left not room for Bill to hold that against him.

“You are right, actually, I’ma lucky man to have her in some sort of way.” Bill nodded to himself a few times as he sat back in his chair with a worn sigh. “I just.. wish I still had Ellen to help me through it. I don’t know...” He found himself tripping over the words, not sure exactly what he meant. If he meant he missed his wife, or his rock, or the grounding force that Ellen’s forthright nature had always been - even if the ground was shaking when he left and the rock was starting to crack. “It wasn’t like we were in the greatest spot, but she was always there, and always knew better how to handle the unexpected. And now I’m what?” Bill stared at the empty glass on the coffee table before him pensively, brows furrowed and eyes unfocused in the wavy patterns of the glass’ surface as if he could will it full again without having to lose his train of thought. “I ain’t no widower, I’m not’a divorcee, I’m not even a fuckin’ single man really-” He felt the cold metal of his wedding band sharply around his finger, rubbing the scratched surface unconciously with his thumb as he frowned, “-I’m just fuckin’ alone now and I don’t even know where or when the fuck I am really.”

“It’s like there’s a gaping hole in your world where someone is supposed to be, right?” Grey’s eyes were fixed on his, no longer glossy and his cheeks were dry now, but there was still that warmth of understanding that made a chill run down his spine that perhaps this monster was reading his thoughts even though both he and Jo had promised the shadow didn’t do that without permission. There was a quiet, huff of a laugh before the other continued with a sad smile. “I was away from Jo for a... bit more than a year while I had Gwen. I didn’t want us to break up, but things outside either of our control had happened and I couldn’t endanger her being with her still, or coming back to her.”

“Why not?” “The situation with my daughter was unpredictable with the mother. And I couldn’t risk both Jo and Gwen like that. I had to pick one-” “You made the right choice.”

The other man jerked as if in pain at that, and Bill caught his scared and worried eye for a moment as he held him there in that look. Sure, whatever must have happened was bad, but Bill’s daughter was safe and happy and the monster seemed to be the same for the most part. And whatever had happened, Bill would find out eventually but, had left Jo safe and living in a way that the hunter could never think another solution would have been better.

“Sometimes I wonder.” There was a hollow sound to the words, empty and echoing like they had not been given a voice before, before the shadow shook his head free of whatever mists had been passing through with those painful feelings. Grey paused for a moment before sighing quietly. “But while I was away? It felt like there was a gap beside me where Jo should’ve been - walking on the sidewalk beside the stroller, holding the basket at the supermarket, sitting on the other side of the breakfast table laughing about something-” The shadow’s eyes darted across to his own for a moment as he paused again before adding quietly, “-in my arms or in the bed beside me - it felt like there was an empty space where she was supposed to be. And I guess you must be feeling the same.”

“Only so far as Ellen was always where I cam home to, and the last I saw the Roadhouse was an empty plot of earth where my parents bar had been.” “That makes sense-”

“Nothing of this makes any sense,” Bill cut over sharply with a tired smile. That was the most honest thing he’d said in his second life, and that it was so clear to know that logic and reason had gone out the window long before his own arrival was surrealist and absurdist in the most ridiculous way. Shaking his head, he looked at his glass again with a weary sigh. He shouldn’t have another but he was damn needing one right about now at the vague feeling that perhaps he’d be accepting the idea briefly suggested by his girl and her monster for him to stay a while.

As if reading his mind, the other gestured at the glass in a questioning way before the shadow asked gently. “Another one, Mr Harvelle?”

“Sure thing, and make it Bill for now.” The hunter replied lifting and holding the glass out towards the other as Grey rose to his feet to take it and his own empty glass for a refill. The look of surprise that glossed over the man’s face got even more so as Bill leaned back and kicked his feet up onto the edge of the coffee table with a sigh, adding quietly. “Might as well get comfortable if I’m stayin’ a while, right?”

There was another awkward pause, before a slightly warm chuckle came from the other alongside a nod as he turned back towards the kitchen with both glasses in hand. “Sure thing, Bill. Might just bring the bottle back?”

“You do that.”

---

#billpov #au stories #kidverse #ca

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cannotgiveafuck · 5 years

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Billy Batson & Captain Marvel identity analysis (long post ahead)

Alrighty then! So I contemplated posting this bc it's so closely tied to the wip fic, buuuut here it is. Ive never been really satisfied with how some media portray this character bc they either lean too far towards childish or angry, or divide the identities too much. And whilst writing the fic I thought about how I wanted to portray him and what that entailed. A long semi comprehensive ramble of headcanons and character analysis based on the individual and combined identities of Billy and Marvel!

First, we have Billy. This kid who's parents died on a work trip, was left in the care of a greedy/selfish old man that did not care for him at all, has bounced through foster homes for a plethora of reasons (some of which are behavioral or abusive), and ultimately decided trying to make it on the streets was his best option (before being picked up by Dudley).

Now, backstory wise, it's all very obvious that Billy would have trust issues, especially towards adults (and double towards adults who try to control him). His learned attitude towards those that set their eyes on him (both before and especially after becoming Marvel) is guarded and aggressively defensive, he's snarky and sarcastic, ready to flee at a moments notice, and scared of being once again used, abused, and tossed aside if he were to trust someone. But at his soft core he desperately wants to be cared for, he wants affection and love and family, he wants a safe and secure home, he wants to believe in good.

All of this bleeds into his attitude towards his peers, too. Before becoming Marvel, he's a bit jaded and lost - his wrecked home life creating the chasm that keeps him from opening up and relating to others, from making real friends (the few exceptions being friends he considers family, and whom he is very loyal and protective of). After Marvel, Billy doesn't even try to associate with kids his own age. He stops going to school and is so focused on trying to be a good hero, he has distanced himself even more. But also, all the situations that he is exposed to really matures him. He still enjoys video games and sports, but he's also worrying about keeping Fawcett City and the world safe and working with JL - he doesn't have time nor patience for naive and clueless kids. But since he still is a kid and wants to have fun, those he let's in he holds onto and divulges everything to.

However, despite his hard outer shell, I do believe Billy is good and tries to be good and wants to see the good in those around him. A prominent and reoccurring memory of his parents is them telling him to be a good kid. That very much shapes Billy's views and ideologies. He wants to be a good person, which means he needs to help others (however he sees fit, from stopping bullies to carrying an old ladys groceries), but also realize that there is good all around him in everyone else, too. He has kind neighbors, and a community that helps each other, he knows everyone has their own struggles and they may direct negative emotions outward but may just need a helping hand in return. Billy knows suffering and cruelty and does not want to cause that, he wants to end it. So, theres this conflict inside him that he views as being smart vs being good. His true sunshine and trusting demeanor is boosted when he is chosen by Shazam, because now he has this divine and worldly responsibility to do and be good. And while he does not hold value in himself (abandoned and abused orphan does not hold a high confidence or self esteem level), he also wants to prove that he is worthy of inheriting this power, that there is good in this world and in him.

Now, second we have Captain Marvel. This is where identities become...complicated. The way I see it, Marvel is a mesh of 'Billy Batson', 'The Potential Adult Billy Could Be', and 'The Vessel of The Greek Gods Powers'. Since I've gone over Billy's identity, it transfers onto Marvel pretty seamlessly. So as The Adult Billy, he is still Billy Batson, but the grown up version, comfortable in his skin and in social standings with others, he is without the limiting physiological responses and capabilities of being a child. Despite all his experiences, Billy is still a kid - a bit awkward in his growing body, he's impulsive with his emotional responses, he jumps to conclusions and is very one track minded, has a hard time putting words to thoughts or instincts and understanding certain things and intentions (situations being very black and white). But as Adult Billy who is Marvel, he still sees through the same eyes, but he can filter distractions and pause to think through reflexive emotions, and he has a better understanding on just how morally grey the world can be, a gained clarity on other intentions and livelihoods, and he can empathize and read other's emotions in more detail than just the basic happy/mad/sad. Basically, Billy's brain has physically grown to that of an adult.

On the other hand, there is also what I like to believe is a...sort of third will in what makes Captain Marvel. He is, for all intents and purposes, a vessel or an avatar of sorts. He is a Chosen Champion by the Wizard Shazam to wield the powers of the Greek Gods (specifically the Greek gods, bc...well, that's a whole other post to ramble on), hes the mortal connection between them and the human world, their gift to the humans as a protector, as the guiding light of good. He is a symbol and title beyond one person. It is much like the mantle of Batman being passed on, except instead of all the gadgets and tech and databases...it's experiences and memories and wisdom gained by the previous Marvels, and available when properly called upon. Captain Marvel is like a reincarnation every time there is a new chosen champion. Billy is himself, but there were also others before him, other Marvels that existed and lived that can be remembered.

There is, however, a weird side effect to this being that the more in touch and immersed with these previous Marvel's he becomes, the more he slips away from himself - less Billy and human, more ancient and disconnected. He loses Billy's mannerisms and speech pattern and warm empathy, he still follows the ideology of good, but the charisma is gone, he's distant and cold.

All of this makes for a very interesting and fun way of writing Marvel and Billy - in how they each think through situations, how they each interact with the same people, how they each react to everything. And that's including how the same people react and treat each of them differently. Someone may see and treat Billy as a kid, but with Marvel they interact with and see an adult, a peer. When someone knows who Marvel really is, they need to consciously remind themselves that Marvel is Billy is a kid, because literally everything about Marvel screams at their senses that he's an adult (sunshine naivety aside). He still walks and talks and looks and is capable of thinking like an adult. It's not a situation of a couple of kids standing on top of each other in a trenchcoat or a kid dressing and doing their makeup like an adult. Magic has made him an adult, sort of.

At the core of it, the one experiencing and remembering and feeling everything is a child. There is no separating that, he is a different face of the same coin. So while Marvel can handle the emotional and mental exhaustion and stress of the situations he is put in, Billy Batson is going to suffer through the replays when everything is done. Because superheroing is not all saving lives and being praised, it's seeing people be hurt and bleed, interacting with the worst of humanity and others, witnessing tragedies and death in small intimate encounters and in large numbers. He is the one that will have nightmares and trouble sleeping, he is the one that will bear the brunt of the trauma and remorse, navigating detailed memories of violence and how it felt to hurt, wondering why there are phantom pains and aches when his body is not damaged, all with no trusted support system to turn to (because if he does, will the JL just see him as a child who cannot handle being a hero? will they turn him away?). Billy is the one having his childhood and innocence ripped away from him for the sake of the world. There are consequences of being the chosen champion, and while Billy is willing to accept them, will continue to fight and uphold his divine duties, will put others before himself every time, it wont make be easy.

The potential of how complicated Billy and Marvel can be, and how other heroes cannot fully comprehend it without a trusted in depth discussion (only Black Adam can understand and lemme tell you, that's a hot mess) - that's what makes him and his situation so interesting and fun to write.

#billy Batson #captain marvel #shazam #long post #character analysis rambling #i just have lots of ideas and feelings for his lightning boy #and this is just billy as a kid #as a teenager it gets even more complicated

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licenselesswriter · 4 years

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The One Who Stayed CH17

3 weeks have gone since he talks with Riley, and even when he expected this, he didn't realize it would affect him that much. But when he opens his front door and take a look at Maya, having troubles to open a pickle jar, he knew it was something he needed to do - Can I open that for you? - Lucas asks Maya before taking off his jacket.

- My hero - Maya says and hands him the pickle jar.

Lucas opens it with no effort and gives her the jar back. He sits next to her and kisses her cheek.

Maya takes a pickle and gives it a bite - I told you, it's gonna take years for her to open up again to you - she says, feeling how Lucas buries his nose on her neck.

- I know, I just feel bad for her - Lucas replies and his hands sneak around her waist, cuddling with her.

- What about Lily? - Maya asks, taking another bite of her pickle.

- You were so right, she's smarter than any of us, except, probably, Isadora - he answers, making Maya look at him - She understands what's happening so well, and even when Riley still weirdly looks at me, she makes Riley feel happy - he continues.

Maya looks at him completely spellbound by him - You're a proud Papa, don't you? - she says.

- I am - Lucas replies and kisses her Maya on the lips - You're disgusting - he says with a smile on his face, tasting the pickles on his mouth.

- I'm disgusting? you're the one who kissed a pickle - she replies and kisses him back.

Lucas just chuckles and kisses her neck, and Maya got tense for a second, something that he notices on the spot - Something wrong? - he asks.

Maya smiles at him and lets a sigh escape from her lungs - Nothing escapes to you, right? - she says.

- We both know that's not true, but go on - Lucas replies.

Maya takes a second to think, of course, telling him it's the best course of action - I... - she started with a bit of doubt - I get another gig - she informs him.

- Really? That's awesome - Lucas says, excited for Maya.

- Yeah - Maya says in a tone that turns down a bit Lucas excitement - You're not gonna be that happy when you know for how long I have to be out - she adds.

Trying to be a supporting partner, Lucas smiles at her anyways - Why? Is this gig a full-time job and you need to move? - he asks.

Maya chuckles, sometimes it surprises her how he always finds a way to make her laugh - Ha, ha, no, definitely not a full job - she answers and then takes his hand - But... - she starts with a bit of doubt - I'm gonna be in Venice for a year - she adds.

- It's not that bad, hell, even I like L.A. - Lucas says, clearly mistaking the Venice she's talking about.

- Eh, no, not Venice Beach in L.A. - Maya stops him - I mean Venice as, you know, Italy - she corrects him.

- Oh - Lucas softly says, now understanding why he wasn't gonna like the gig - You serious about this? - he asks, just to be sure.

- Ehhhh, pretty sure, I mean, it was very clear in the contract - she says before looking at him - Are you mad? - she asks while she tries to figure out his feelings.

- I... - Lucas started but cuts himself in the middle - I honestly don't know what to say - he says confused - Which is embarrassing for someone my age - he jokes, trying to calm himself.

- Should I go? I should go, this seems like the right thing to do - Maya says, nervous about his reaction - Let's talk tomorrow, ok? - she says before getting up.

Fastly Lucas takes her hand, making her look at him - Do you have to leave? - he asks her.

- No - she answers - But it looks like you need some time alone - she adds.

Lucas looks at her surprised - What? - he asks - You're gonna be out for a whole year and you think I want some time alone? - he asks then.

- You want me to stay? - Maya asks back.

- Of course, I want you to stay - Lucas fastly replies - I want to be able to enjoy every moment we have left - he adds.

Maya sits back on the couch and covers her face with her hands - God, you aren't like any other guy - she says.

- Well, I needed to shape up to be with someone like you - he says and smiles to her.

- Sap - Maya teases him - But I'm gonna allow it - she says and puts a kiss on his lips.

- Ok, tell me more about this gig - Lucas says, putting on his best act to hide his real feelings.

Later that night, after Maya falls asleep, Lucas gets up from his bed. Very carefully he walks outside his room and softly, and very delicately he walks into his guest bathroom. He lets the water run freely and splash a bit on his face - You did it well this time Friar - he says while he looks at his reflection in the mirror.

Next morning, Maya wakes up before him and looks at his face, she was able to notice that he was worried, even when his words lie and encourage her, she knew he wasn't a fan of her decision, but sadly she already signed it, there was no stepping back now. The weekend turned out to be short when you know the person you Love is moving for a year, but, as a responsible father, Lucas didn't let that affect his parenthood.

Lily starts to spend a lot more time with Mia and Jayden on Mia's home while he's at work, also spending a few hours with Maya in her studio when she's free to do it.

One afternoon after work, Lucas drops on Maya's studio to pick up Lily, only to find his daughter clinger onto her new partner.

- You know I need to ask - Lucas says looking at his daughter's reaction when he insists that they need to go home.

- I told her - Maya replies caressing Lily's hair.

- About the gig? - Lucas mouth the question, Maya only nods - Oh - he softly says and walks towards them -Lily? Sweetie? - Lucas calls his daughter.

Lily softly separates from Maya and looks at her father - I don't want Aunt Maya to go away - she says before hugging him.

At that moment Lucas was finally able to see it. No matter how mature his daughter wanted to act, she was only 6, and she needed for him to step up for her and tell her, make her feel sure, that everything It will be ok. Lucas starts to caress Lily's hair and then puts a soft kiss on it - Lily, Aunt Maya isn't going away, she got a job in Venice, she's not moving to Venice forever - he explains and then looks at Maya - Or at least I expect that - he adds, making Maya laugh - Also when she came back, she's gonna bring us a... - he stops for a second and grabs his phone - Bixby, show me popular souvenirs from Venice Italy - he says and his phone fastly follow his command - She's gonna bring us mask's - he adds and Maya looks at him clueless.

- Yeah, I'm bringing back Mask's for us to have a blood moon ball - Maya plays her part on trying to console Lily.

- What? - Lucas asks.

- For real? - Lily asks at the same time.

- Of course - Maya Answers Lily - It's a ball with red lighting - she explains to Lucas.

- That sounds cool - Lucas mouth to Maya, who only laughs - Lily, please look at me - Lucas asks his daughter.

Lily slowly and carefully look at her father's eyes - I don't wanna lose more things - she says, almost in a cry for help before hiding her face on Lucas' shirt.

At unison, Maya and Lucas look at each other, with either of them knowing exactly what to say to Lily.

- Lily - Lucas starts - I know that it might look like you're losing things, but if you look it with a different perspective, you will know that you haven't lost anything - he says and kisses Lily's head - You have a mother who would die for you, a father who would do the same, and a godmother that, based on previous experiences, might kill for you is you ask her nice and pretty - he says.

Maya looks at him with dead fish eyes - For real? I'm the murderous one? - she asks.

- Remember Billy Ross? - Lucas asks back.

Maya takes a second to process Lucas' words, then she gets closer to Lily - Your father is right; I would kill for you if you ask me nice and pretty - she concedes.

- In the end, you still have a family who loves enough to kill or die for you, and the fact that your Aunt Maya needs to work overseas doesn't mean that she's not gonna pick a flight to kill if you ask - he says while Maya asks herself if she really is the homicidal friend of the group - I know this might sound like I'm asking too much, but I just want you to enjoy your life, even when things are changing, because sometimes - Lucas says and looks directly at Maya's eyes - Change is for the better - he finishes.

Lily keeps her head buried on her father's shirt - I want Ice Cream - she softly says.

- Cookies & Cream? - Lucas asks, with a smile on his face.

- Thank you - she says finally raising her head to smile at Lucas.

- That's the smile I want to see every day - Lucas says and lifts Lily - Should we invite Aunt Maya to have Ice Cream with us? - he asks.

- Yes - Lily softly says, a bit tired from crying - Want to come with us, Aunt Maya? - she asks, brushing her eyes.

- Of course, it's free ice cream with my favorite Goddaughter after all - Maya replies, being immediately hugged by Lily.

At the same moment, Lucas and Maya look at each other, they both knew that things might be a little rough, but they can handle worse.

- Excuse me, Mrs. Friar - Riley's secretary calls the brunette.

- Please, Carol, It's Riley, but if you can't drop the honorific, call me Miss Matthews - Riley corrects her secretary.

- I'm sorry Miss Matthews - Carol fastly says.

Riley keeps looking at her secretary - Excuse me, why did you come to my office? Did something happen? - she asks.

- Oh, yes, Mr... - Carol wanted to say but was interrupted by someone Riley wasn't sure she wanted to see.

- Mr. Gardner is visiting Miss Matthews with no arranged date - Charlie interrupts - Thank you, Carol, I think I can handle from here - Charlie says trying to get rid of Riley's secretary.

Riley immediately starts to rub her nasal bridge.

Charlie just sits in front of her and wait, he knew how was Riley when she was taken by surprise, and at this moment he was sure he was a bad surprise for her.

- What are you doing here Charlie? - Riley asks, still with her fingers massaging her nasal bridge.

- I came here to play my last card Riley - Charlie says looking at her hand and the lack of a ring.

- Please don't waste your time - Riley replies before taking a look at her ex-lover and start working again.

- I was offered a job in L.A. - Charlie says.

- Congrats? - Riley says with doubt - Don't know exactly what you want me to say, to be honest - she adds.

- Tell me I have over a 1% chance to be with you again and I will stay - Charlie says, betting his future on her.

Riley takes a few minutes - I'm sorry Charlie - she apologizes to him.

- So even all of me is nothing compared to the mighty Lucas Friar and Riley Matthews? - he asks, trying to get some sympathy from Riley.

- There is not Lucas and Riley, not anymore, not in the future, short or long - Riley answers his question - It's not for him that I'm shutting you down, it’s for me and my daughter that I'm shutting you down - she adds.

- Your daughter would love me, and you know that, before we started she loved uncle Charlie, remember? - he asks again.

- But my daughter will grow one day, and I can't I know her, if I make her choose between staying with Lucas and Maya or You and me, she will pick Lucas without a hitch - she explains - I can't be with 1/3 of the reason why her parents divorced, and I will never pick you over her, never - Riley continues.

Charlie almost can hear his heart breaks - You said you loved me - he says remembering all the times they share her bed - I know I can make you love me - he continues.

Riley just gets up from her chair and walk to the door - If you ever had a chance to make me love you, why I didn't leave Lucas to be with you? - Riley asks in the most merciless way she had.

Charlie looked at her shocked - You don't mean that - he says in complete denial - I know I make you love me once, give yourself the chance to love again, give us a chance to be now that Lucas isn't in the middle - he adds, almost begging her.

- Charlie stop - Riley cuts him - We were lovers? yes, did a few times say that I loved you after you giving me an orgasm? yes too, but I don't love you - she adds - If I wasn't able to Love Lucas properly, what makes you think one day I can love you? - she asks him and holds the door for him - Please leave, these are working hours - she says, waiting for him to leave.

She didn't expect what would happen next. - Mommy? - Lily asks Riley when Lucas drops her in her apartment.

- Who? - Lucas asks, immediately examining Riley's eye.

- It's not your problem anymore Lucas - Riley says holding her tears.

- I didn't ask if it was my problem - Lucas replies - I ask who I'm gonna send to the hospital - he continues.

- Lucas calm down you don't need to send him to the hospital - Riley tries to calm her ex-husband.

- Him? - Lucas asks and then realizes - Charlie - he says and the look on Riley's eyes confirm his suspicion - I'm gonna kill him, take care of Lily - he says and tries to walk away, only to be stopped by Riley.

- Security already manages to do that - Riley says and holds him by the arm.

- How bad? - he asks.

- The company has to pay surgery for his nose and hip - Riley answers.

Riley was able to see how Lucas' shoulders relax - Let's go inside, I'm gonna take a look at that eye - he says and escorts Riley and Lily inside. Once they were inside Lucas looks at his daughter - Lily, why don't you go to the kitchen and get your Mommy a bag of ice? - he says.

- On my way - Lily replies and runs to the kitchen, only to come back a few seconds later - Mommy, where are the plastic bags? - she asks.

Riley can't resist laughing - Third bottom drawer - she answers.

Lucas takes Riley face with her both hands and starts to examine the purple on her eye - Ugly motherfucker, I should have killed him at our place - Lucas softly says.

Maya remembers the incident and smiles at his words - Don't worry, I broke his nose - she comments - I had a great teacher - she adds holding his hand.

- Riley - Lucas started, but was interrupted by Lily who runs to deliver the plastic bag with ice - Oh, thank you, Lily - he says and then walks to the kitchen himself, to pick up a dishtowel and wrap up the bag with it - Here, put it over her eye, it's gonna help it with the swelling - he says to Lily, go fastly runs with the dishtowel in hand to help her mother. A few hours later, after Lucas left Lily sleeping on her bed he stops for a second and looks at his ex-wife - Riley, can we talk for a moment? - he asks her.

- Well, you cooked for us, it's the least I can do - she answers and points at the couch in front of the one she was sitting on.

Lucas sits and rests his arms on his knees - The cold war we're having, please let's put it on pause when we're around Lily - he starts.

- Excuse me? - Riley says half confused and half angry.

- Before you kick me out listen to me - Lucas continues - I don't care how you treat me, but our cold relationship it's affecting Lily, and I'm sure that's a thing we both don't want for her - he adds, making Riley relax for a second.

- You can't blame me for hating you when after our divorce you fall directly into my best friend arms - Riley comments.

- And you can't blame me for refusing to fix things between us - Lucas counters - But I can blame us for affecting Lily more than she needs to be affected - he adds - So please, let's call a truce - he asks.

- And you want us to play the happy family once a week? - she asks back in a sarcastic tone.

- I don't mind doing it, anything for my daughter - Lucas answers.

- What? - Riley says confused.

- One night every week - Lucas says, knowing that Maya will kill him for this - We have diner, together - he adds - One week my place, one week your place - he continues.

- To give her a sense of tranquility - Riley says, still thinking about it

- Exactly - Lucas says and offers her his hand - Are you in? - he asks.

Riley laughs - I can't argue against that logic - she says and shakes his hand.

- Surprise Motherfucker! - Zay screams at Lucas after punch his mouth and drops him in his entrance.

- What the fuck Zay - Lucas says before receiving his friend help to get up.

- That was the deal, I help you with Lily and Riley and I'll get to punch you back, remember? - Zay asks.

- And how the hell you know what you suggest work? - Lucas asks back.

- Bitch please, Farkle might be the book smart one, but I'm people smart - he answers.

Lucas just opens his door and let his friend walk-in - I hate when you're right - he says.

Zay smiles - Yes you do, but not tonight because now we're even and this means we're back at being friends - he says before making a tiny dance - And God knows how much I've missed you - he adds before continue dancing.

- You're an idiot - Lucas says before taking a beer from his fridge and put it on his lip.

- Yes, I am, and this idiot needs his best man back, please say that we're best friends again - Zay asks him.

- Maya is my best friend - Lucas replies and gives him a beer - But you're pretty close to her - he adds.

- That was beautiful, if we were both gays I would marry you - he says and opens his beer.

- So, when's the wedding? - Lucas asks avoiding his declaration.

- 5 months, 13 days, 17 hours, and 43 minutes from now - Zay answers while he looks at his watch.

- Poor Vanessa, she can do so much better - Lucas says with a smile on his face.

- You're spending way too much time with Maya - Zay replies.

- I have to - Lucas says - She's gonna be working in Italy for a year in - Lucas says before looking at his watch - 1 month, 6 days, 17 hours, and 42 minutes from now - he adds.

- And what you're planning to do? - Zay asks.

- What do you mean? - Lucas asks back while he opens his beer.

- I mean what you're planning to do to make her stay - Zay answers, taking a sip of his beer.

- Nothing - Lucas says.

- You're kidding - Zay replies in the second.

- No, I'm not - Lucas says, letting a deep and long sigh escape his lungs - She deserves to fulfill her career, and I'm not gonna be in the middle of that - he adds.

- Wow, who knew you can pass from the one who works overtime to the one who stayed - Zay comments on his actions.

- Well, I'm a father before a partner, and my daughter needs me here, I can't leave everything to follow Maya to Italy - Lucas argues back.

- And what's gonna happen when Lily asks you why you and Aunt Maya didn't work? - Zay asks.

Lucas just stays silent for a few minutes, dumbfounded by that question - One day I'm gonna cut that silver tongue of yours - he threats his friend.

- You're not gonna do that, you love me - Zay replies with his usual smile.

#GMW #Lucaya #Lucaya Fanfic #Lucas x Maya #OoC Riley #Recovering Lucas #The One Who Stayed #This episode was brought to you by Big Time Rush' Elevate Album

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hazelmariewrites · 5 years

Text

Ellie

I thought it would be nice to share a piece of work, so here is a short psychological horror story that I wrote my freshman year of college! I’ve come SUCH a long way with my writing since then, but this has always been a favorite of my own work. Maybe I’ll even revisit it someday.

Synopsis: Ellie’s imaginary friends helped her cope with a traumatic childhood. As she gets older, however, their intentions start to seem malicious--and Ellie is easily influenced.

Trigger warnings: Mental illness, murder

"It's unfortunate that we can't talk somewhere more comfortable," said the graying man as he opened his notebook and perched it on his crossed legs, "but everyone's very concerned for your safety."

He was referring to the handcuffs which held my hands together and my legs to the metal chair I was sitting in. The room was cold and the dim light above us flickered as if it could go out at any second. A police officer was by the door, smacking his gum at an irritating volume. Definitely not a comfortable place for me to be recounting my life story.

"My name is Dr. Wright," the man continued. "I'm here to get your side of the story, Ellie. It's important for you to be able to tell it to someone who can understand your state of mind, don't you think?"

My initial response was to feel insulted by the fact that he was, in his shrink sort of way, calling me crazy, but then I realized that I probably was so I nodded my head. With a smile, he clicked his pen and scribbled something down, then pulled some papers out of a manila folder.

"Okay, Ellie, let's go all the way back to when you were a child. I have some files which show that your father was arrested a few times for domestic abuse..." he stopped for a moment to look up and gauge my reaction. I guess I was supposed to be troubled by him bringing this up, but it didn't have an effect on me, so he continued. "What was your childhood like?"

For a while I sat there staring at the wall behind him. He waited patiently for me to begin, but I wasn't sure how. My younger years were all a giant blur, but there was one day in particular that stood out in my memory. So I told him about the only childhood I ever knew.

"Damn it, Pam, you're blockin' the TV!" my father yelled as my mother crossed his view of the football game to bring him a beer. He ripped it from her hands, cracked it open, and took a swig without a thank you. My mother hovered next to him for a moment as if she wanted to say something, but ultimately returned to the kitchen without a word.

I was in the corner playing with the knock-off Barbie doll I had gotten a few days earlier for my fourth birthday. She was missing a shoe and it looked like someone had cut a chunk out of her hair. I was too young to realize that my mother had probably fished it out of a dumpster.

My father stood up and wobbled over to the bathroom, and on his way back he stopped in front of me. "Why you playin' with this stupid doll?" he growled, bending over to grab it out of my hands. "Get in the kitchen and help your mother!"

He mocked me when I started to cry, and upon hearing this, my mother emerged from the kitchen. "Keith, what are you doing?" she asked. My father turned to her and pointed a finger in her face.

"You stay out of this Pam, you're the reason our daughter don't know nothin'. She's gonna turn out to be a good for nothin' whore just like her momma!"

My mother started to protest but her words were cut short when my father struck her across the face. I ran to my room but I could still her them yelling, so I climbed under my covers, closed my eyes, and put my hands over my ears.

A few moments later I felt my covers move back. I opened my eyes and saw a girl my age with red hair and freckles. "Sara!" I cried, throwing my arms around her. She hugged me tight with a chuckle.

"What are you hiding from?" she asked. Her eyebrows knitted together as I explained that my parents were fighting again.

"I ought to teach that dad of yours a thing or two!" came a voice from behind me. I turned around to see my friend Billy had joined us. I laughed at his enthusiasm and gave him a hug. Sara and Billy kept me company until there was a knock at my door.

"Ellie, who were you talking to?" my mother asked as she entered my room. Her face was red and swollen and there was a cut on her lip. Sara and Billy had disappeared.

"I was just singing a song, Momma," I lied. My mother sat down next to me on my bed and put her arm around me. We sat like that for a little while, and then my father called for her and she left.

"Sara and Billy were your imaginary friends?" Dr. Wright asked. I nodded.

"Some of them," I said. "There are others."

"Are?"

"Were. I meant to say were."

Dr. Wright raised a brow and scribbled something in his notebook. I swallowed hard and started picking at my cuticles to distract myself from my mistake. Three of my fingers had started to bleed by the time he stopped writing.

"How many?" he finally asked.

"Five," I replied.

"How often did they visit you?"

"They were my only friends." I explained. "They showed up whenever I needed them, from my parents fighting to eating lunch alone at school."

"You saw them at school?"

"Yes."

"Tell me about that."

"He's just mad because you're smarter than him," Sara assured me as I stared down at the large number 63 written in red across the top of my latest Biology test. "I'm telling you, all you have to do is threaten to out his little affair with that blonde bimbo in the third row and he'll get off your back."

I rolled my eyes. My eight grade biology teacher, Mr. Goodwin, definitely favored the girl Sara had in mind, but accusing him of an affair was overdramatic. I started walking toward my locker and Sara followed me, insisting on weaving through the students even though she could have passed through them with no trouble.

"What's that?" Sara asked as we reached my locker. A triangle of pink construction paper was hanging out the bottom, and when I opened the door a heart shaped card fell to the floor. I reached down and picked it up.

"Dear Ellie," it read across the front. I opened it. "You are so beautiful, but I've always been afraid to tell you how I feel. In the spirit of Valentine's Day, would you meet me on the stage of the auditorium after school? Love, Your Secret Admirer."

I looked up at Sara, a smile creeping across my face. She didn't share my enthusiasm.

"Ellie, don't do it," she begged, knocking the card to the floor. "I have a bad feeling about this."

I picked the note back up and placed it carefully in my locker. I promised Sara I wouldn't go, but I did.

The auditorium was pitch black aside from the lone spotlight shining down on the stage. My palms were sweaty and my stomach was flip-flopping all over the place, but I forced myself to make my way over. I couldn't see past the edge of the stage as I stood waiting for my admirer, but I heard a door open and close. My heart thundered in my chest.

"Hello?" I called out. My stomach turned over as I heard laughter. I began to realize that I should have listened to Sara.

"What's the matter, Ellie?" asked a girl's voice. "Have you been stood up?"

I tried my hardest to keep my composure, but as the lights turned on and I saw three girls video taping me, I couldn't stop the tears. Their cameras followed me as I fled the room, and I locked myself in a stall of the nearest bathroom.

A few moments later there was a knock on the stall door. I choked at them to go away through my tears, but a quiet voice revealed that it was Sara so I let her in. She held me until my sobs turned to sniffles, and then she pulled back with a fierce look in her eyes.

"You can't let them get away with this, Ellie," she said.

"What am I supposed to do?" I asked, my cracked voice barely above a whisper. A mischievous smile spread across her face. She opened the stall door to reveal Billy and the rest of my friends waiting with small cardboard boxes. She motioned for me to look inside.

I walked slowly over to one of the boxes and gasped in disgust as I saw what was inside. Cockroaches. I jumped back and looked at Sara in horror.

"What am I supposed to do with those?!" I cried. She walked over to me and put her hands on my shoulders, staring into my eyes with determination.

"You're going to put them in their lockers," she explained. "Just imagine their faces when they go to get their books before first period. And everyone will be there to see! It's going to be great, Ellie, trust me. They'll never mess with you again.”

I shook my head, but she held my gaze. The longer I looked into her eyes, the better the idea seemed. Before I knew it I was breaking into their lockers and laughing along with my friends as we emptied the boxes.

I got to school early the next morning. One by one I heard screaming throughout the halls as they all found their surprises. I was later called into the principal's office, but none of them could explain why they suspected me without admitting what they had done, so my revenge went unpunished. I stayed up late that night laughing with my friends, recounting how well our plan had played out. It was the happiest I had felt in a long time.

He asked me about my mother's death next. I explained that the doctors found the cancer too late, and her battle was relatively short. He asked me if I missed her.

"Well, yeah," I answered. "My childhood was rotten, but it wasn't her fault. She tried. And she really did love me."

He raised his eyebrows. "That's very mature of you."

I shrugged. "I missed her a lot at first especially. Until he got sick, I became my father's new punching bag."

"How did you deal with your father's illness?" he asked. "It must have been hard leaving school to take care of the man who caused you so much pain."

"It was," I admitted. "And I didn't always handle it well."

He asked me to elaborate.

"Ellie," my father croaked from his bedroom. I sighed and closed the book I was reading, but waited a moment before I got up to see what he wanted. When I entered his room I was greeted by the loud beeping of his oxygen machine.

"Something's come loose," he said. "The damn thing won't shut up."

Sara appeared at the doorway. She stared blankly at my father as I worked to fix his machine.

"How can you spend every day of your life taking care of this bastard after everything he's done to you?" she asked, crossing the room until she was watching him from the foot of his bed. I turned to her and tried to think of an answer, but there really wasn't a good one.

"What else am I supposed to do?" I asked her.

"About what?" my father asked. I ignored him and waited for Sara to respond. She finally tore her eyes away from my father and looked into mine.

"Leave," she said. "Come with us, we'll take care of you!"

My eyebrows knitted together sympathetically. "But you're not real," I reasoned. Her face twisted into an expression of outrage.

"Don't you dare say that!" she screamed. I winced and turned away. My father was watching me carefully.

"You're a damn freak," he declared. "Y'know that?"

"Don't talk to me that way," I warned. He chuckled.

"I'm your father, I can talk to you however I want."

I had so many emotions taking over my mind. I was frustrated that Sara didn't understand why I couldn't leave. She refused to look at me, and it annoyed me and broke my heart at the same time. But above all I was pissed. I was incredulous at my father for having the nerve to talk down to me when I had put up with so much from him, and was now his sole caretaker. Didn't he realize how quickly I could end things for him?

Before I had time to decide whether or not it was a good idea, I was unplugging my father's oxygen machine. Its usual hum disappeared and my father began to choke.

"E-Ell-W-Wha," he sputtered, unable to form even a word. I looked over at Sara, who wore a satisfied smirk on her face, then looked back at my father. I watched him squirm for a few more moments before plugging his machine back in. He gasped a few times, his wide eyes searching my face for some sort of explanation.

"Never disrespect me again," I demanded. "Understand?"

He nodded, and I followed Sara out of the room.

"How did you feel about your reaction once you had time to reflect on it?" Dr. Wright asked in typical shrink fashion. "Were you frightened by it at all? Guilted?"

"I felt good about it," I replied. "I was glad to finally see him put in his place."

Dr. Wright nodded thoughtfully. I noticed that the officer by the door had fallen asleep, so before he had a chance to ask his next question I decided to tell him something I had been keeping from the police.

"My father had been dead for a couple of days before I called anyone." I said. Dr. Wright nodded quizzically at me.

"Yes, it says that here in my notes," he said. "You were out of town with a friend, right?"

"No," I replied, chewing the inside of my cheek anxiously. "I wasn't out of town."

He pulled out his notebook, of course, and started taking notes. I continued as he wrote.

"He woke me up one night calling my name. I don't know why, but I just couldn't find it in me to get up and check on him. I went back to sleep and when I woke up the next morning he was dead. It was shocking, but honestly it was a relief. I'm not sure what kept me from reporting it, but for the next two days I just pretended he wasn't there. It was very relaxing."

Dr. Wright scribbled away at his quickest pace yet. Then, as an afterthought, he turned back to see why the officer hadn't reacted to my news. I expected him to wake the officer and make me repeat it, but he didn't. He took a deep breath and turned back to me.

"Where was Sara during all this?" he asked.

"Around," I answered. I thought he'd push for details, but once again he defied my expectations. Instead he dug out some papers.

"You started working at Holbrook National Bank not long after your father's death, am I correct?"

A chill ran down my spine and my palms began to sweat. I nodded, knowing where his question was leading. We were coming to the end.

"Is that how you came to know the deceased?"

"Excuse me, miss, I'm new in town and I'm looking to open a checking account here."

I looked away from my computer and saw a tall, lean man whose short black hair was speckled with gray here and there. There were wrinkles at the outer corners of his eyes, as if he had smiled a lot in his lifetime. The wrinkles deepened as he smiled at me with perfect teeth, and I felt my heart jump into my throat.

"Oh, Jeanie can help you with that," I told him, my finger shaking slightly as I pointed to an office at the end of the lobby. He kept his eyes on me rather than following my finger.

"Thank you, ma'am," he said. I felt my face turn pink as he laughed and winked, then made his way to Jeanie's office.

For the next two months the man came to my window every Thursday. I learned that his name was Scott and that he had moved into town because of a business opportunity that arose just after his divorce was finalized. He had a young daughter, Rose, who he saw every other weekend.

Scott's charm never ceased to disarm me, so when he showed up one Thursday with a small bouquet of roses and asked if I was free for dinner the next night, I almost forgot how to say “yes.” But I figured it out.

My friends weren't happy when they heard the news. They mostly pouted, but Sara was adamant on getting me to change my mind.

"You barely know him!" she argued. "He's fifteen years older than you! Plus, just went through a divorce, so he's not going to be settling down with anyone anytime soon. He's probably handing out flowers to girls all over town!"

"Sara, stop," I said firmly, "I'm an adult now and I'm through letting you make my decisions for me. You're not going to talk me out of this just because you're jealous that I'm finally getting along with a real person."

Sara didn't respond to this. She disappeared for the rest of the evening, and for the next few weeks I only caught glimpses of my old friends. When I saw them they were huddled together, as if planning something. I should have suspected something, but things were going well with Scott and I was glad to finally have a sense of normalcy. I was too old for imaginary friends anyway.

By the time Scott and I had been dating long enough for him to want me to meet his daughter I hadn't seen my friends for over a month. I felt normal for the first time in my adult life. I was excited to be taking such a big step in my relationship, and to finally have people in my life that my mind hadn't fabricated.

The night before I was to meet Rose I was feeling very upbeat, so I decided to surprise Scott at his house with takeout from his favorite Chinese restaurant. I used the spare key he kept under his doormat to get in. I called out to him, but there was no response. I began to worry that he may have gone to bed early.

I put the food down on his kitchen table, and as I walked up the stairs I saw a dim light pouring through the cracked opening of his bedroom door. I opened it just wide enough to see Scott sitting against his bed frame, reading by the light of his bedside lamp.

"Hey handsome, didn't you hear me?" I whispered, not wanting to startle him too badly. His expression was one of shock despite my hushed tone.

"Ellie, what are you doing here?" he asked. I just smiled and walked into the room, but my smile faded quickly as the rest of his bed came into my view. Lying next to him was a sleeping mess of red curls and black lingerie.

My mouth dropped. Sara was right: I wasn't the only pretty young thing in Scott's life. I stared at him in disbelief as he put his book down and asked me once again what I was doing at his house. No apology, not even a recognition of the fact that I had just caught him in bed with another woman. I felt adrenaline searing through my body, and my hands started to shake.

"How could you?!" I cried.

"How could I what?" he responded. I clinched my fists and charged at him. He blocked my blows and tried to restrain me, so I grabbed his lamp and crashed it over his head. He stopped fighting immediately, but I kept attacking.

Each time I brought the lamp down on his head his face changed. He became my father, the kids at school, and everyone else who had ever done me wrong. Eventually the lamp broke to the point that I had nothing left to bring down onto him.

The red head started to laugh. With the lamp broken I had no way of seeing, so I lunged over Scott's body in the general direction of her laughter. I was surprised to land on the mattress. There was nothing there. The sound of her laughter seemed to have moved to the other side of the room. I started toward it, but stopped dead in my tracks when I heard a second source of laughter, then a third, and then more until I couldn't tell how many there were.

I felt the walls until I found the light switch, and when I flipped it on I found my friends all standing next to Scott. Sara was a few steps in front of the rest, sporting black lingerie.

"Hey, old friend," she said. "We missed you."

Dr. Wright was satisfied with the information he gathered. He told me he would relay it all to my court appointed lawyer, who should then have no trouble putting together an insanity plea. He said all of this as though it should be happy news.

"What's wrong with me?" I asked, fighting back tears. I hated myself for what I had done. I hated that I let my childish coping mechanisms get out of control. I hated that I would never be normal. Dr. Wright sighed.

"There are a number of disorders that involve your symptoms," he said, "but I'll need more time to give you an official diagnosis. What's important is that they're gone. You said you don't see them anymore, correct?"

I opened my mouth to protest, but then Sara stepped out from the darkened corner where she had been listening in secret all along. She stared me down until I was too afraid to speak, so I nodded my head. The now-conscious police officer escorted me back to my cell where the rest of my friends were waiting.

#writeblr #short story #writing #horror #psychological horror #ellie #rachel greenwood #stories

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anonymous-hopeful · 6 years

Text

The Soul Society (Chapter Two: And We Shall Ride Forevermore)

First chapter is here:https://anonymous-hopeful.tumblr.com/post/168367064353/the-soul-society-chapter-one-snow-melts-with

Elder Kettle sat alone in his room, his cane tapping the floor. Once the members of the society had left for the brief recess, he had checked on the young sippy cups laying asleep in their cribs. Both Cuphead and Mugman hadn't awoken during Chill E.'s storytelling, thank goodness, and after a quick kiss and a fixing of the covers, he left the young to their rest. The kettle smiled fondly; he remembered that it wasn't too long ago when the stork had left the babies at his doorstep. In fact, it was a few months after the casino was built. There was no doubt in the elder's mind that during that time when everything felt dark and despaired, the two innocent babies wrapped in swaddling cloths had just brought him all of the joy in the world. As he reminesed on that fateful day, a knocking on the door had interrupted his thoughts.

Sighing, Elder Kettle eased up from his rocking chair and made his way to the door, finding himself surprised when he saw the Blind Spectre on the other side.

"Spectre? Don't ya have somethin' ta do with the Phantom Express?", Elder Kettle asked, displaying a look of concern.

"Yes...well, um...I should but...I just...wanted to look...at the babies.". Spectre explained, a nervousness in his voice.

Elder Kettle thought for a moment. Spectre, as he now is, was an optimistic, charming young lad, especially when he was human, despite his total blindness and speech impediment. Ever since what...happened...however, he was gifted with vision in his afterlife, and from then he had spent his free time seeing everything he had missed in Inkwell Isle. Giving a gentle smile, Elder Kettle had let Spectre in, and allowed him to see the sippy cups.

Grinning wide, Spectre opened up his eyes, or rather, his hands, to see the little ones.

"Oh...they're adorable...I wish they...were awake...so then I could...hold them.", Spectre said, a genuine happiness in his voice.

Elder Kettle nodded, agreeing with the spirit. "You still haven't told me why you had to look at the boys so urgently.".

"Um...well...I can...see...into the future!", he proclaimed, before adding, "I see those two saving us all...no more debts...".

This had piqued Elder Kettle's interest. "Really, now? Well, what exactly didja see?".

The Blind Spectre tapped his chin. "I can't...describe it well...I think they destroyed them...but I'm not sure why...or how they...got them in...the first place.".

Before Elder Kettle could respond, the grandfather clock in the living room had rung, signalling the end of the recess...

Even though they were often called by nicknames (T-Bone, the blind lad, and simply the twins), they did indeed have real names. Yes, not many would know, but the men who worked the Inkwell Express were originally from somewhere else on the globe, a place that didn't have the astounding magics of Inkwell Isle, but where the people spoke eloquently with a rich and fluttering accent that made the poorest of pesants sound regal. The one called T-Bone, the oldest member of the Express crew, had the name Thomas Hardwick. He himself had spent majority of his life in the fancy magic-void place, making a living as an engineer.

The twins, slightly older than the blind lad, but only by a few years, were Billy and Bobby Blayzon. They certainly were an interesting duo; styled their hair the same, always finished each other's sentences, never separated from one another. Thomas had found them trying to sleep in one of the train's freight cars one night in a blustering winter, the only thing keepng them warm being their ragged overalls and a single piece of cloth barely large enough to cover one brother. When confronted, they had told their story; their mother would terrorize them, beating their bodies since they could breathe. Without a father to protect them, the boys suffered until one day, when they had stowed away enough supplies, they had escaped, and hadn't looked back since then. The young teens begged the older man to let them stay, and Thomas, feeling pity, would teach them how the locomotive worked, having them do a job in exchange for a home, and at the slight expense of Thomas, cash.

The blind lad would not come into the picture until many years later. While the lad was a teenager, the twins were in their twenties, and Thomas was almost fifty-eight. A group of people were loading into the train to travel to far destinations; for some, it was work, for othera, it was school or home. One fateful day, the lad had boarded the bus. Even though he hadn't a stick or a dog, Thomas could tell he was blind. His eyes were a haunting shade of blue, and they'd loll about carelessly, never focusing on one thing. Somehow, the lad had managed to make his way on, find an empty seat, and crack open a book without any assistance. Feeling the need to talk to the boy, Thomas made his way over to him and sat down.

"Are ya new here?"

"Hm?", the lad answered, his head turning to the sound of the older man's voice.

"Are ya new? I ain't seen the likes of ya here before."

"What a thick accent...are you from...the countryside?"

Thomas looked at him, confused.

"Uh-"

"Sorry...Random question... I'm new here, yes...It was rather easy ...navigating my way, however.... I told mother... I'd be fine by... myself, after all, I did graduate ...Nottingham's School for the Impaired... with top honors, and... even my assistant says... that I'm more ...than able to get around.... without trouble. I just use... my hands as eyes,... they work just as ...well, if not better... that actual eyes.".

The blind lad chuckled before continuing.

"My name is... Emery Spectre, my apologies... for not mentioning sooner. I've been told ...I have a high level of... brain power. One day, I hope... to be the first blind person... to operate a locomotive...ambitious, huh?".

Thomas grinned, though he knew Emery couldn't see him.

"Well, if yer interested, I happen ta be the conductor of this here train.".

Emery was quiet for a moment, before replying, "I will most... definitely consider.".

The years had passed, and every day Emery could be spotted on the train.

"Do you think boss will-", Bobby began.

"Let Emery work train?" Billy finished, looking at Thomas with bright eyes.

This would eventually work, and Thomas was going to implore that Emery work with them, when one day, the blind lad had came to the train exclaiming that he was invited to work a train on a remote island, and that Thomas, Billy, and Bobby should come as well. Against better judgement, the three agreed, and all were on the next ferry to Inkwell Isle.

Now, Thomas, Bobby and Billy, and Emery were known as some of the few humanfolk on the Isle, and conductors of the magical Inkwell Express, who was a sentient being itself.

"Look's like we're nearin' the second part of the Isle, Head.", Thomas warned.

Nodding in response, the Head of the Train prepared to brake, coming to a slow and squeaky stop.

"Uh oh. That doesn't sound good.", the Head stated, taking a look at its brakes.

"Seems like we'll have ta cut this run short...Emery, could ya ask someone on the Isle ta warn everyone about the Devil?", Thomas inquired.

"Sure, of course...I'll be back soon!", Emery replied, getting off the train to travel around the carnival around them.

Who would be the best to spread the word around this part of the Isle? Grim and Wally could fly, but Grim had a stuttering problem, sort of like he did, and Wally refused to leave his nest for anything. That left Djimmi, Beppi, and the Baroness. Emery stopped to think a bit. Who was the most mature and efficient? Actually, that didn't take much thought. Now, Emery was making his way to the Baroness' castle.

The huge thing growled at him with a mean grimace as he stood in front of it.

"Pardon me, but...I have news for ...the Baroness, and I ...mean no harm.", Emery stated calmly, soon after hearing the clicking of high heels down stairs.

"Aha! I thought that was your sweet voice, lad! Please excuse my castle; he isn't used to the sight of you yet, as you barely come by! Tell me, what news do you have?", the Baroness inquired, quite merrily.

"I regret to ...inform you that ...the Devil's Casino ...is up and running. We on the ...Inkwell Express had ...come to warn everyone ...on this part of the Isle ...and the next, however... the Express isn't ...at it's peak performance. I implore you ...to tell everyone ...on this part ...of the Isle.", Emery answered.

"Oh my! I shall! I shall, and right away, too! Sir Waffington! Gather the other members of the court! We have a mission to fulfill!", Baroness von Bon Bon cried out as she went back into the castle. A moment later, she came back out to say,

"Tell Rumor that I said hello, and come back soon, sweetheart!".

Emery gave a nod and a smile as he went back to the Express.

"I told the Baroness... and she promised to ...spread the word. Will we be ...able to make a ...stop at the... first part of ...the Isle?", Emery asked, a twist of excitement in his voice.

"Ye know the train ain't working right. Why do you-!"

Thomas yelped as the train came to another squeaking halt. Immediately, he looked to the twins, who's hands were grasping the brake.

"He wants to see flower...", Bobby whistled.

"Ya know...Cagney.", Billy finished with a snicker.

Thomas rolled his eyes. Emery was an exemplary man, but there was absolutely no way Thomas could make sense of the whole...flower thing...maybe he was still getting used to the Isle, or all the weird magic, which he was also getting used to, but at the moment, he never thought about falling in love with any odd being, more or less falling in love with a flower, and a male flower at that, yet here he was, and there went Emery, into the forest to find the carnation he was so fond of.

"Cagney? Cagney...? This forest was...always difficult to...navigate...", Emery sighed, before a familiar voice (and an unfamiliar voice) caught his attention.

"Ya wouldn't believe it, Cags! That's the fifth time today one of us has been plucked from the ground! The punk lady didn't even ask or check if he was alright! She just turned around and gave him to her friend, like a gift! I'm tellin' ya, Cags, the vegetation of Inkwell Isle barely get any pod-pickin' respect! More so the flowers! Plucked from the dirt and made into bouquets and decor! One day I oughta-".

"Calm down, Dave, you don't want to loose your petals again! Though I agree with you completely! We must establish our dominance, not just in the forest, but in the rest of the isle! Extreme pollination, total domination!".

"Haha, yes! This is why yer the flower's flower, Cags! Extreme pollination, total domination, that's what you say! If only! One day, at least...humph.".

Nervous, Emery turned toward the voices. He had taken a step, than another, before managing to step on a rather loud...something.

"Wha?! Who is it this time?!", the small, angry flower grumbled.

"Emery? Oh my, how much of that conversation did you hear...?", Cagney chuckled nervously.

"All the same...you and your plan...I'm terribly sorry ...for your friend.", Emery replied.

"Ah, save it. Yer lucky ya only stepped on a branch. Dang humans, ruinin' the welfare...", the flower muttered, stomping away.

"You'll have to pardon my friend, David Daysie, he isn't as open-minded about humans as others.", Cagney apologised.

"Oh, no, it's not...an issue, I just...wanted to talk with...you before we...on the Inkwell Express...head back.", the other proclaimed.

" Oh, you're too kind! Nice to have someone, a human, who understands the pain that flowers are subjected to. If only there were more like you.", Cagney sighed.

Emery had inched forward, his hands in front of him, until he felt Cagney's soft petals. Remembering again the structure of Cagney's face, Emery cupped his lower petals and kissed the flower on his forehead.

"There are more, you'll see...". Emery sighed.

"Heh...humans understanding us? Never...Inkwell Express, huh?"

A while later, Emery had returned to the train.

"Thank goodness. We gotta be headin' back now, the trains getting more wonky.", Thomas warned.

"Uh oh...let's hurry back...", Emery concurred.

"I can handle this last ride back!", the head of the train claimed, as he began to work his way down the track.

The first moments for the ride back were fine, and the head was having no problem. After rounding a turn however, the head, as well as the crew, noticed that something was wrong.

"Hey, shouldn't we be slowing down?", Thomas asked as the train accelerated more.

"Well, yes, but...I'm not slowing down for some reason. Last time we checked, I thought it was the engine that wasn't workin!," Head exclaimed.

"Billy? Bobby?", Thomas inquired.

"Don't look at us!", Bobby cried.

"We didn't break anything!", Billy added.

Thomas nodded. "Well, then, if the brakes aren't working, I guess...hey, where's that lever?".

The crew looked at the control panel, nearly jumping in horror at the reveal of no manual brake lever.

"Yikes! We've been sabotoged!", Thomas cried out in fear.

"What? What are we...to do?", Emery asked, shaken.

"I...um, well, we can't jump, so...", Thomas replied, looking over at the others.

"Huh? No, you aren't...", Billy gasped.

"...saying what we think?", Bobby whimpered.

"We're in a runaway train, going who knows how fast...I don't know what to do!", Thomas panicked.

"Wait! I'll keep us going until we can come to a safe stop. We aren't giving up yet!", the head yelled.

"Head, I applaud ya, but this train is going to crash! Yeah, we'll keep going, but what about those mountains, or the amusement park? We have to accept that we're not making it out of here. There's no way.", Thomas sighed.

"But I could save you all at least! I don't want ya dead! Not on my watch! Couldn't I try?", the head pleaded.

"Head...listen when I say this...crash the train.". Thomas ordered.

"But...but...", Emery stuttered.

"Wait! Couldn't we-", Bobby chimed, before being cut off with Thomas yelling, with tears bursting out of his eyes,

"JUST CRASH THE DAMN TRAIN!!"

and the head silently agreeing...

The thunderous crash was heard throughout the Isle. Nearly, no, everybody knew what had happened. The wreckage was an atrocity, for when the train had collided with the side of the mountain in the third part of the Isle, there was a slight outbreak of fire fueled by the train's tinder. The head was busted and dented, just barely hanging by a shoestring. The others...practically crushed, even charred.

"A train wreck? How awful...King Dice?"

"Why, yes, boss?"

"Let's see if we can't get some free souls.".

King Dice, dressed dapper and stylish as always, walked out to the wreckage. In the side of the mountain, near the casino, lay the busted train. Scowling, the die surveyed the area, seeing if there was anyone on the train to deal with. He had peeked inside one of the passenger cars of the locomotive, cringing when he saw the bloodied and broken bodies inside. Shaking his head, he looked around a bit more, spying the Head of the train crying weakly though busted beams.

"Rough day, eh pal?", King Dice inquired, his best expression of sorrow on his face.

Gradually, the Head looked over at the die, not able to muster a word.

"I don't blame you. It's not everyday something like this happens. I never rode the Express myself, but I've heard good news about it. I mean, twins, a blind lad, and a conductor from a foriegn land running a train? Amazing, in itself. If only there was a way to, I don't know, bring it all back? To continue riding on?.", Dice hinted, a smirk making its way to his face.

The Head didn't speak, more...coughed, but King Dice continued on nonetheless.

"I can't bring them back from the dead, per se, however, I could them, and the train an afterlife! Train for the dead! How about that? Instead of the Inkwell Express, it could be the uh...Phantom Express! Yes, the Phantom Express. How does that sound?', King Dice asked the Head.

"...y.....ye...yes....", the Head uttered.

"Well, it won't take much. All you'd have to do is sign a soul contract. It's a fair deal; I make your friends undead train conductors, you sign the souls over to me and my boss, and hand them over when it's time. We got a deal?", Dice implored with a sleazy look about him.

With the wave of his hand, a contract appeared, a blank line waiting to be signed.

"All ya gotta do is say yes."...

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strangenormal · 6 years

Photo

I Myself Am Strange & Unusual Part 4

Disclaimer: I do not own characters featured in Stranger Things. This will contain adult/mature content as it progresses. Input is always appreciated. And requests are open as well. Hope you enjoy.

(Sorry there is no hopper in this chapter. Trying to give more into your character interacting with everyone. Hopper will DEFINITELY be in the next one though.)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

It was the first day if school and you were late! You got assigned a homeroom last minute and had to be there earlier than you originally planned.

"Come on Rose! Let's go! Move, move, move!"

"Alright! Alright!" She stopped short as she rounded into the kitchen once she saw you.

"What? Do I have something on my face? Is there a stain or rip in my clothes?"

"No - you look great... I've just never really seen you dressed up like this. It's usually jeans and a shirt."

She snickered at you a little. She knew how much you disliked needing to dress up, unless it was a fancy formal occasion.

"Watch it little lady. It's the first day so I have to make a good impression. And no one's going to be painting today, so I don't have to worry about my clothes as much."

She burst out laughing at your look of discomfort. You could only pout before pushing her out the door and into the impala. You drove as fast as you could without getting in trouble and made it with about 5 minutes to spare. Rose started to bolt for the doors of the middle school, but quickly turned around to give you a quick hug before rushing off. You were thankful to start your day with freshman instead of seniors. You knew how cruel older teens could be to a new teacher and wanted time to observe the students before they get ideas of going in for the kill.

"Good morning students! My name is Mrs- I mean Ms. Powers. I am your home room teacher, but as you can tell by the classroom, I am also your new art teacher. Home room will be used to get yourself ready for your school day. This could range from catching up on homework or reading, etc. However, I also wanted to give you the opportunity of working on art as well if you wish to do so. I was informed that you will have a creative writing assignment in your English class that will make a huge portion of your grade for the semester and I thought it would be interesting to do art work for your stories. This is NOT necessary for any portion of your grade in my class. I found it easier to compose a story with visual aids and thought some of you would be interested. Please let me know, don't be afraid to ask me for help on anything, and I look forward to getting to know each and every one of you. Are there any questions regarding home room?"

You take a glance across the room and see a gathering of tired faces, uneasy faces, some eager faces, and some faces you recognize. You had Dustin, Mike, and Will in your home room class. You had gotten to know them a little bit from Rose spending time with them. You suspected Dustin had a crush on Rose. He called almost everyday they didn't hang out and he had been over for dinner a couple if times already.

Some kids showed interest in doing art for the morning so you allowed them to use sketch paper and colors if their choosing. The first half the day went without any problems. You had your class at the middle school and then your last class of the day was back at the high school.

Rose was in your class at the middle school she was excited to showcase her own artistic talents. You definitely enjoyed the eagerness of the middle school class, but were excited for the intricate projects you would get to do with the high school students.

You had Jane, Max, Lucas, and Will in your last class of the day. You had a feeling your last class was going to be one of your favorites. The 4 of them had offered to stay and help you prep for the some the projects to start the next day and soon the rest of the gang and Rose joined in. With so many hands shuffling, it came as no surprise to you that your outfit ended up splattered. Max felt terrible, but you assured her it was fine and being an artist, you always had spare clothes never knowing where a piece may lead you.

You changed into jeans and a Metallica T-shirt. Upon leaving the bathroom, you walked right into what felt like a brick wall. Before you fell to the ground, a pair of arms held you against the forces of gravity and helped you into your upright position.

You looked to who saved you and were met with an astounding pair of blue eyes, blonde locks, and a set of lips in a wicked smirk.

"I am SO sorry." You got yourself out of his grasp as you ran a hand through your hair.

"Not a problem princess." You watched as his eyes roamed over your figure from your toes up to your head before looking you in the eye like a wolf on the hunt. You scoffed slightly at the young man in front of you. You'd be lying if you said he wasn't attractive, but he had to be no older than 18, 19.

"Right...thanks for the help."

You started to walk back to your classroom, only to notice him close behind.

"Can I help you with something?"

"I could think of a thing or two we might be able to help each other on, but I'm here to pick up my step-sister Maxine."

"You mean Max? She's in my classroom."

You saw his face become riddled with confusion.

You stuck out your hand to shake his. "Ms. Powers, I'm the new art teacher. And your name would be?"

He took your hand in both of his gently as he smiled at you like you were a snack. "The name's Billy. Billy Hargrove."

You had to admit this kid was smoother than the average teenage boy. He licked his lips before pulling his lower lip between his teeth as he looked at you.

You started to remove your hand from his grasp, "It's nice to meet you Billy. Max s quite the young lady. I'm looking forward to getting to know her more."

"As I'm sure she's looking forward to getting to know you." He looked you up and down again as you turned to finish your walk to your classroom.

You heard a scoff behind you as you came to your classroom door. You looked at Billy with an eyebrow raised in question.

"Room 69...how appropriate." You weren't going to dignify him with a response and only opened your door to see everything set up and ready for the next day minus the brushes you had to pull out.

"You guys are awesome! Thank you! Any of you wanna come over for pizza on Friday as a thank you?"

You get a full house of "yes" replies as you all exited your classroom. The boys and Jane got on their bikes while you, Rose, Max, and Billy went to your cars. Billy let out a whistle while he checked out your car.

"Nice set of wheels you got. I bet she rides like a dream."

"Like you'd never believe." You said your goodbyes and got in your car to head home.

On the drive Rose was quiet.

"What's up?”

"We still haven't talked about what happened the other day."

"And you know I'd rather not...unless you've had things happen..."

"No...I haven't, but-"

"Then that's the end of the discussion."

"But mom-"

"Rose. We've discussed this time and again. We are not to talk about it, unless it's affecting both of us. Then there's nothing to worry about. You got it?"

She hung her head low. She knew this was a sensitive subject for you, even more so after the death of her dad. You grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze.

"I love you. I just don't want to start worrying if we don't have to, ok?"

Your gut was telling you to be prepared and this time you were going to listen, even if you didn't really want to. You were tired of running.

#chief jim hopper x reader #chief hopper #chief hopper fanfiction #chief hopper x reader #jim hopper #jim hopper x reader #jim hopper fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction

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gaysparklepires · 6 years

Text

26. Clouds

Read on AO3

The counter in Alice’s bathroom was covered with dozens of various hair products and colognes. Since no one in this house appeared to use either, I could only assume she’d bought most of these things with me in mind. I read the labels numbly, struck by the waste.

I was careful never to look in the long mirror.

Alice combed through my hair with a slow, rhythmic motion.

“That’s enough, Alice,” I said tonelessly. “I want to go back to La Push.”

How many hours had I waited for Charlie to leave Billy’s house so that I could see Jacob? Each minute, not knowing if Jacob was still breathing or not, had seemed like ten lifetimes. And then, when at last I’d been allowed to go, to see for myself that Jacob was alive, the time had gone quickly. I felt like I’d barely caught my breath before Alice was calling Edward, insisting that I keep up this ridiculous sleepover façade. It seemed so insignificant…

“Jacob’s still unconscious,” Alice answered. “Carlisle or Edward will call when he’s awake. Anyway, you need to go see Charlie. He was there at Billy’s house, he saw that Carlisle and Edward are back in from their trip, and he’s bound to be suspicious when you get home.”

I already had my story memorized and corroborated. “I don’t care. I want to be there when Jacob wakes up.”

“You need to think of Charlie now. You’ve had a long day—sorry, I know that doesn’t begin to cover it—but that doesn’t mean you can shirk your responsibilities.” Her voice was serious, almost chiding. “It’s more important now than ever that Charlie stayed safely in the dark. Play your role first, Beau, and then you can do what you want second. Part of being a Cullen is being meticulously responsible.”

Of course she was right. And if not for this same reason—a reason that was more powerful than all my fear and pain and guilt—Carlisle would never have been able to talk me into leaving Jacob’s side, unconscious or not.

“Go home,” Alice ordered. “Talk to Charlie. Flesh out your alibi. Keep him safe.”

I stood, and the blood flowed down to my feet, stinging like the pricks of a thousand needles. I’d been sitting still for a long time.

“That outfit looks adorable on you,” Alice cooed.

“Huh? Oh. Er—thanks again for the clothes,” I mumbled, distracted.

“You need the evidence,” Alice said, her eyes innocent and wide. “What’s a shopping trip without a new outfit? It’s very flattering, if I do say so myself.”

I blinked, unable to remember what she’d dressed me in. I couldn’t keep my thoughts from skittering away every few seconds, insects running from the light…

Jacob is fine, Beau,” Alice said, easily interpreting my preoccupation. “There’s no hurry. If you realized how much extra morphine Carlisle had to give him—what with his temperature burning it off so quickly—you would know that he’s going to be out for a while.”

At least he wasn’t in any pain. Not yet.

“Is there anything you want to talk about before you leave?” Alice asked sympathetically. “You must be more than a little traumatized.”

I thought I knew what she was really curious about. But I had other questions.

“Would I be like that?” I asked her, my voice subdued. “Like that girl Bree in the meadow?”

There were many things I needed to think of, but I couldn’t seem to get her out of my head, the newborn whose life was now—abruptly—over. Her face, twisted with desire for my blood, lingered behind my eyelids.

Alice stroked my arm. “Everyone is different. But something like that, yes.”

I was very still, trying to imagine.

“It passes,” she promised.

“How soon?”

She shrugged. “A few years, maybe less. It might be different for you. I’ve never seen anyone go through this who’s chosen it beforehand. It would be interesting to see how that affects you.”

“Interesting,” I repeated.

“We’d keep you out of trouble.”

“I know that. I trust you.” My voice was monotone, dead.

Alice’s forehead puckered. “If you’re worried about Carlisle and Edward, I’m sure they’ll be fine. I believe Sam is beginning to trust us… well, to trust Carlisle, at least. It’s a good thing, too. I imagine the atmosphere got a little tense when Carlisle had to re-break the fractures—“

“Please, Alice.”

“Sorry.”

I took a deep breath to steady myself. Jacob had begun healing too quickly, and some of his bones had set wrong. He’d been out cold for the process, but it was still hard to think about.

“Alice, can I ask you a question? About the future?”

She was suddenly wary. “You know I don’t see everything.”

“It’s not that, exactly. But you do see my future, sometimes. Why is that, do you think, when nothing else works on me? Not what Jane can do, or Edward, or Aro…” My sentence trailed off as my mind continued wondering.

Alice watched me for a moment, then answered. “Jasper, too, Beau—his talent works on your body just as well as it does on anyone else’s. That’s the difference, do you see it? Jasper’s abilities affect the body physically. He really does calm your system down, or excite it. It’s not an illusion. And I see visions of outcomes, not the reasons and thoughts behind the decisions that create them. It’s outside the mind, not an illusion, either; reality, or at least one version of it. But Jane and Edward and Aro and Demetri — they work inside the mind. Jane only creates an illusion of pain. She doesn’t really hurt your body, you only think you feel it. You see, Beau? You are safe inside your mind. No one can reach you there. It’s no wonder that Aro was so curious about your future abilities.”

She watched my face to see if I was following her logic. In truth, her words had all started to run together, the syllables and sounds losing their meaning. I couldn’t concentrate on them. Still, I nodded. Trying to look like I got it.

She wasn’t fooled. She stroked my cheek and murmured, “He’s going to be okay, Beau. I don’t need a vision to know that. Are you ready to go?”

“One more thing. Can I ask you another question about the future? I don’t want specifics, just an overview.”

“I’ll do my best,” she said, doubtful again.

“Can you still see my future?”

She didn’t answer right away. This was the question she’d been wary of, I could tell. The looks she had given me back in the clearing after the battle made sense to me now

“I see lots of futures for you, Beau.”

I nodded slowly.

She examined my face, her eyes unfathomable. “Don’t you know your own mind, Beau?”

“I don’t anymore.”

“I’m only as sure as you are, Beau. You know that. If you were to change your mind, what I see would change… or disappear, in your case.”

I felt my stomach drop as Alice hit the nail on the head. I felt my face get hot, and tears start forming in the corners of my eyes.

Alice rushed forward and put her arms around me. “I’m sorry, Beau. I can’t really empathize. My first memory is of seeing Jasper’s face in my future; I always knew that he would be where my life was headed. But I can sympathize. I’m sorry you have to choose between two good things.”

I sniffed back the tears, “Don’t feel sorry for me.” I didn’t want sympathy. I didn’t know what I wanted. Which was the real crux of the problem. I had to make a choice, and I had to break a good heart in the process.

“Beau,” Alice began gently, “I want you to know that no matter what, or who, you choose, I’ll always love you. I know your decision isn’t easy. I know how unhappy this is making you… I wish I could help you.” She hugged me tightly.

“Thank you, Alice.” I hugged her back. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. But right now, I have to go deal with Charlie.”

I drove my truck back home, where Charlie was waiting just as suspiciously as Alice had expected.

“Hey, Beau. How was your shopping trip?” he greeted me when I walked into the kitchen. He had his arms folded over his chest, his eyes on my face.

“Long,” I said dully. “We just got back.”

Charlie assessed my mood. “I guess you already heard about Jake, then?”

“Yes. The rest of the Cullens beat us home. Esme told us where Carlisle and Edward were.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m really worried about Jake. As soon as I make dinner, I’m going down to La Push.”

“I told you those motorcycles were dangerous. I hope this makes you realize that I wasn’t kidding around.”

I nodded as I started pulling things out of the fridge. Charlie settled himself in at the table. He seemed to be in a more talkative mood than usual.

“I don’t think you need to worry about Jake too much. Anyone who can cuss with that kind of energy is going to recover.”

“Jake was awake when you saw him?” I asked, spinning to look at him.

“Oh, yeah, he was awake. You should have heard him—actually, it’s better you didn’t. I don’t think there was anyone in La Push who couldn’t hear him. I don’t know where he picked up that vocabulary, but I hope he hasn’t been using that kind of language around you.”

“He had a pretty good excuse today. How did he look?”

“Messed up. His friends carried him in. Good thing they’re big boys, ‘cause that kid’s an armful. Carlisle said his right leg is broken, and his right arm. Pretty much the whole right side of his body got crushed when he wrecked that damn bike.” Charlie shook his head. “If I ever hear of you riding again, Beau—“

“No problem there, Dad. You won’t. Do you really think Jake’s okay?”

“Sure, Beau, don’t worry. He was himself enough to tease me.”

“Tease you?” I echoed in surprise.

“Yeah—in between the swearing, he said, ‘Bet you’re glad he loves Cullen instead of me today, huh, Charlie?’”

I turned back to the fridge so that he couldn’t see my face.

“And I couldn’t argue. Edward’s more mature than Jacob when it comes to your safety, I’ll give him that much.”

“Jacob’s plenty mature,” I muttered defensively. “I’m sure this wasn’t his fault.”

“Weird day today,” Charlie mused after a minute. “You know, I don’t put much stock in that superstitious crap, but it was odd… It was like Billy knew something bad was going to happen to Jake. He was nervous as a turkey on Thanksgiving all morning. I don’t think he heard anything I said to him.

“And then, weirder than that—remember back in February and March when we had all that trouble with the wolves?”

I bent down to get a frying pan out of the cupboard, and hid there an extra second or two.

“Yeah,” I mumbled.

“I hope we’re not going to have a problem with that again. This morning, we were out in the boat, and Billy wasn’t paying any attention to me or the fish, when all of a sudden, you could hear wolves yowling in the woods. More than one, and, boy, was it loud. Sounded like they were right there in the village. Weirdest part was, Billy turned the boat around and headed straight back to the harbor like they were calling to him personally. Didn’t even hear me ask what he was doing.

“The noise stopped before we got the boat docked. But all of a sudden Billy was in the biggest hurry not to miss the game, though we had hours still. He was mumbling some nonsense about an earlier showing… of a live game? I tell you, Beau, it was odd.

“Well, he found some game he said he wanted to watch, but then he just ignored it. He was on the phone the whole time, calling Sue, and Emily, and your friend Quil’s grandpa. Couldn’t quite make out what he was looking for—he just chatted real casual with them.

“Then the howling started again right outside the house. I’ve never heard anything like it—I had goose bumps on my arms. I asked Billy—had to shout over the noise—if he’d been setting traps in his yard. It sounded like the animal was in serious pain.”

I winced, but Charlie was so caught up in his story that he didn’t notice.

“’Course I forgot all about that till just this minute, ‘cause that’s when Jake made it home. One minute it was that wolf yowling, and then you couldn’t hear it anymore — Jake’s cussing drowned it right out. Got a set of lungs on him, that boy does.”

Charlie paused for a minute, his face thoughtful. “Funny that some good should come out of this mess. I didn’t think they were ever going to get over that fool prejudice they have against the Cullens down there. But somebody called Carlisle, and Billy was real grateful when he showed up. I thought we should get Jake up to the hospital, but Billy wanted to keep him home, and Carlisle agreed. I guess Carlisle knows what’s best. Generous of him to sign up for such a long stretch of house calls.”

“And…” he paused, as if unwilling to say something. He sighed, and then continued. “And Edward was really… nice. He seemed as worried about Jacob as you are—like that was his brother lying there. The look in his eyes…” Charlie shook his head. “He’s a decent guy, Beau. I’ll try to remember that. No promises, though.” He grinned at me.

“I won’t hold you to it,” I mumbled.

Charlie stretched his legs and groaned. “It’s nice to be home. You wouldn’t believe how crowded Billy’s little place gets. Seven of Jake’s friends all squished themselves into that little front room—I could hardly breathe. Have you ever noticed how big those Quileute kids all are?”

“Yeah, I have.”

Charlie stared at me, his eyes abruptly more focused. “Really, Beau, Carlisle said Jake will be up and around in no time. Said it looked a lot worse than it was. He’s going to be fine.”

I just nodded.

Jacob had looked so… strangely fragile when I’d hurried down to see him as soon as Charlie had left. He’d had braces everywhere—Carlisle said there was no point in plaster, as fast as he was healing. His face had been pale and drawn, deeply unconscious though he was at the time. Breakable. Huge as he was, he’d looked very breakable. Maybe that had just been my imagination, coupled with the knowledge that I could possibly break him further.

If only I could be struck by lightning and be split in two. If there were two of me, maybe I could make everyone happy. No one would be heartbroken. No one would lose anything.

I put Charlie’s dinner on the table next to his elbow and headed for the door.

“Er, Beau? Could you wait just a second?”

“Did I forget something?” I asked, eyeing his plate.

“No, no. I just… want to ask a favor.” Charlie frowned and looked at the floor. “Have a seat—this won’t take long.”

I sat across from him, a little confused. I tried to focus. “What do you need, Dad?”

“Here’s the gist of it, Beau.” Charlie flushed. “Maybe I’m just feeling… superstitious after hanging out with Billy while he was being so strange all day. But I have this… hunch. I feel like… I’m going to lose you soon.”

“Don’t be silly, Dad,” I mumbled guiltily. “You want me to go to school, don’t you?”

“Just promise me one thing.”

I was hesitant. “Okay…”

“Will you tell me before you do anything major? Before you run off with him or something?”

“Dad...”

“I’m serious. I won’t kick up a fuss. Just give me some advance notice. Give me a chance to hug you goodbye.”

I felt the knots in my stomach as I looked at my father. “I promise, Dad.”

“Thanks, Beau,” he said. “I love you, kiddo.”

“I love you, too, Dad.” I turned to leave but I stopped. I ran back to Charlie had hugged him. He seemed surprised for a moment, but then hugged me back tightly.

The whole way down to La Push my stomach was in knots. My mind grappling with itself and with my heart. I tried to lay out both decisions, both courses in front of me. Tried to quantify and list everything that either choice would mean; the short term, the long term. Somehow the minute my brain began to lean towards one over the other, my heart would pull me back the other way and I’d have to start all over again.

Carlisle’s black Mercedes was not in front of Billy’s house. This was good. I needed to talk to Jacob alone. Having Edward there—any of the Cullens—would only make my decision so much harder.

I tapped quietly on the door.

“Come in, Beau,” Billy said. The roar of my truck was easy to recognize.

I let myself in.

“Hey, Billy. Is he awake?” I asked.

“He woke up about a half hour ago, just before the doctor left. Go on in. I think he’s been waiting for you.”

I flinched, and then took a deep breath. “Thanks.”

I hesitated at the door to Jacob’s room, not sure whether to knock. I decided to peek first, hoping—coward that I was—that maybe he’d gone back to sleep. I felt like I could use just a few more minutes.

I opened the door a crack and leaned hesitantly in.

Jacob was waiting for me, his face calm and smooth. The haggard, gaunt look was gone, but only a careful blankness took its place. There was no animation in his dark eyes.

It was hard to look at his face, knowing that I loved him. It made more of a difference than I would have thought. I wondered if it had always been this hard for him, all this time.

Thankfully, someone had covered him with a quilt. It was relief not to have to see the extent of the damage.

I stepped in and shut the door quietly behind me.

“Hi, Jake,” I murmured.

He didn’t answer at first. He looked at my face for a long moment. Then, with some effort, he rearranged his expression into a slightly sarcastic smile.

“I was afraid it might be like that.” He sighed. “Today has definitely taken a turn for the worse. First I pick the wrong place, miss the best fight, and Seth gets all the glory. Then Liam has to be an idiot trying to prove he’s tough as the rest of us and I have to be the idiot who saves him. And now this.” He waved his left hand toward me where I hesitated by the door.

“How are you feeling?” I mumbled. What a stupid question.

“A little stoned. Dr. Fang isn’t sure how much pain medication I need, so he’s going with trial and error. Think he overdid it.”

“But you’re not in pain.”

“No. At least, I can’t feel my injuries,” he said with a sigh.

I bit my lip. I was never going to get through this.

The wry humor left his face, and his eyes warmed up. His forehead creased, like he was worried.

“How about you?” he asked, sounding really concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Me?” I stared at him. “You must be high. Why are you asking if I’m okay?”

“Well, I mean, I was sure he wouldn’t actually hurt you or anything, but I wasn’t sure how bad it was going to be. I’ve been going a little crazy worrying about you ever since I woke up. I didn’t know if you were going to be allowed to visit or anything. The suspense was terrible. How did it go? Was he mean to you? I’m sorry if it was bad. I didn’t mean for you to have to go through anything alone. I was thinking I’d be there…”

It took me a minute to even understand. He babbled on, looking more and more awkward, until I got what he was saying. Then I hurried to reassure him.

“No, no, Jake! I’m fine. Too fine, really. He wasn’t mean at all.”

His eyes narrowed in suspicion. “What?”

“He wasn’t even mad at me—he wasn’t even mad at you. Actually, he was impressed with you for bowing out like you did.”

Jacob stared at me for a minute, and then he frowned. “Well, damn.” He huffed.

“What’s wrong, Jake? Does it hurt?” My hands fluttered uselessly as I looked around for his medication.

“No,” he sighed. “He really is a little too decent. I was hoping he had been at least a little awful, just to make me feel better. He wasn’t angry at all?”

“Not even a little.”

“Well, I mean, I’m glad he wasn’t angry with you. I wouldn’t want you to suffer… I guess, I don’t know, I was hoping maybe he’d at least be angry with me. Give me some satisfaction after giving up.” Jacob chuckled, then winced.

I flinched at his pain. It was silent for a long moment.

“You’re not really giving up, though, are you?” I finally said.

He smiled. “Not really, I guess. I just won’t keep trying to make you choose me. I don’t want to hurt you anymore by doing that. It’s not fair. Besides, at least you see that you do love me. That’s worth something.”

“Is it? Is it really better than if I was still in denial?”

“Don’t you think you ought to know how you feel?”

I shook my head. “No—I didn’t mean better for me. I meant better for you. Does it make things better or worse for you, having me know that I’m in love with you? When I… when…” I stopped, feeling my emotions welling up. “Would it have been better, easier for you, if I never clued in?”

He took my question as seriously as I’d meant it, thinking carefully before he answered. “Yes, it’s better to have you know,” he finally decided. “If you hadn’t figured it out… I’d have always wondered if your decision would have been different if you had. Now I know. I did everything I could.” He dragged in an unsteady breath, and closed his eyes.

This time I did not—could not—resist the urge to comfort him. I crossed the small room and kneeled by his head, afraid to sit on the bed in case I jostled it and hurt him, and leaned in to touch my forehead to his cheek.

Jacob sighed, and he put his hand on my hair, holding me there.

“I’m so sorry, Jake.”

“I always knew this was a long shot. It’s not your fault, Beau.”

“Not you, too,” I moaned. “Please.”

He pulled away to look at me. “What?”

“It is my fault. And I’m so sick of being told it’s not.”

He grinned, but it didn’t touch his eyes. “You need to get over that. You can’t help that we both fell in love with you. You’re pretty great, you know.”

“Am I? Why do I feel like I’m the worst person in the world right now?”

“You’re the best.” He smiled. “If I hadn’t fallen in love with you then something would have been wrong with me. But he came first, I guess. That’s just how it goes.”

“Jake…”

“It our own faults, really. We made this way harder on you than we needed to. Mostly me, probably… Yeah, especially me.” He chuckled softly. “I was too stubborn.”

I started sniffling softly, my emotions bubbling over.

“Hey, you’re not crying are you?” He shifted slightly on the bed.

“Yeah,” I muttered, laughing weakly at myself through the tears that suddenly burst into sobs.

He shifted his weight, throwing his good leg off the bed as if he were going to try to stand.

“What are you doing?” I demanded through the tears. “Lie down, you idiot, you’ll hurt yourself!” I jumped to my feet and pushed his good shoulder down with two hands.

He surrendered, leaning back with a gasp of pain, but he grabbed me around my waist and pulled me down on the bed, against his good side. I curled up there, trying to stifle the sobs against his hot skin.

“Don’t cry, Beau.” His voice was low and soothing. “Not for me.”

“I think it’s more my fault than either of you want to admit.” I took a deep, ragged breath, trying to control myself.

“No, Beau, you never did anything to hurt us. Never intentionally.” His hand rubbed against my shoulders.

“How did we end up here?” I asked, more to myself than him.

“I don’t know.” He sighed. “But don’t worry, babe. It’s all going to work out.”

“I don’t see how,” I muttered.

He patted the top of my head. “I’m going to give in and be good. Really.”

“What do you mean by ‘be good’?”

“I mean I’ll stop making this hard for you, and I’ll still be your friend, Beau,” he said quietly. “I won’t ask for more than that.”

“I think it’s too late for that, Jake. How can we be friends, when we love each other like this?”

He looked at the ceiling, his stare intent, as if he were reading something that was written there. “Maybe… it will have to be a long-distance friendship.”

I clenched my teeth together, glad he wasn’t looking at my face, fighting against the sobs that threatened to overtake me again. I needed to be strong, and I had no idea how…

He looked back at my face. “I’m not going to split you in half anymore, Beau. I’m not going to keep pulling on your heart, because I think I’m just breaking it.”

I closed my eyes, willing myself to control the pain.

We were quiet for a moment. Neither of us seemed to know what to say.

“Could I tell you what the worst part is?” He asked hesitantly.

“Will it help?” I whispered.

“It might. It couldn’t hurt.”

“What’s the worst part, then?”

“The worst part is knowing what could have been.”

My breath caught and I felt more tears pushing their way to the surface.

“I’m exactly right for you, Beau.” He continued. “It would have been effortless for us—comfortable, as easy as breathing. I was the natural path your life would have taken…” He stared into space for a moment, and I waited. “If the world was the way it was supposed to be, if there were no monsters and no magic…”

I could see what he saw, and I knew that he was right. If the world was the sane place it was supposed to be, Jacob and I would have been together. And we would have been happy. He was my soul mate in that world—would have been my soul mate still if we didn’t live in the world we were in, if things hadn’t happened the way they did.

Two futures, two soul mates… too much for any one person. And so unfair that it wasn’t a choice between someone and someone better. A choice between the two most wonderful, perfect loves I could ever ask for.

“Beau, can I ask you something?” He asked quietly.

“Sure.”

“Could it have been me?”

I looked back on all my time with him, stretching all the way back to when I first came to Forks. To the first time I saw Jacob Black.

“Yeah, Jake,” I felt the tears welling up again. “If I hadn’t ever met him. If he had never been here. It would have been you.” I started crying. “Maybe in another world, a boy moved to Forks and met this wonderful, sunny boy on the beach in La Push… and they started a friendship, and they fell in love… and they’re happy together.” I took a deep breath. “And that’s the worst part for me.”

The tears were pouring out of my eyes now, and I could hear him sniffling as well.

“I’ll never be able to repay you for everything you did for me, Jake.” I cried. “I used to think of you as my personal sun. You balanced out all the clouds for me.”

He sighed. “The clouds I can handle. But I can’t fight an eclipse.”

I touched his face, laying my hand against his cheek. He exhaled at my touch and closed his eyes. It was very quiet. For a minute, I could hear the beating of his heart, slow and even.

“Thank you for telling me,” he said softly. He kissed the top of my head, and then he sighed. “I’ll be good now.”

I looked up, and he was smiling.

“So you’re going to get married, huh?”

“We don’t have to talk about that.”

“I’d like to know some of the details. I don’t know when I’ll talk to you again.”

I had to wait for a minute before I could speak. When I was pretty sure my voice wouldn’t break, I answered his question.

“It wasn’t really my idea, but I suppose I’m warming up to it… a little.”

Jake nodded. “It’s not such a big thing—in comparison.”

His voice was very calm, very practical. I stared at him, curious about how he was managing, and that ruined it. He met my eyes for a second, and then twisted his head away. I waited to speak until his breathing was under control.

“Yes. In comparison,” I agreed.

“How long do you have left?”

“Oh, I don’t know, depends on how long it takes Alice to pull a wedding together, I suppose.” I said softly.

“No, I mean—“ he stopped short.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“I don’t know, Jake. I haven’t decided. It could be a while.” I whispered.

He nodded. This was a relief to him. I wondered how many sleepless nights the thought of my graduation had given him.

“Are you scared?” he whispered.

“Yes,” I whispered back.

“But you’re not totally sure you want… that?” He asked softly.

“No, I’m not.”

We lay in silence for a long time. Finally, I stretched my neck up to whisper in his ear, laying my cheek against his warm skin. “You know I love you.”

“I know,” he breathed, his arm tightening automatically around my waist. “You know how much I wish it was enough.”

“Yes.”

“I’ll always be waiting in the wings, Beau,” he promised, lightening his tone and loosening his arm. I pulled away with a dull, dragging sense of loss, feeling the tearing separation as I left a part of me behind, there on the bed next to him. “You’ll always have that spare option if you want it.”

I made an effort to smile. “Until my heart stops beating.”

He grinned back. “Maybe even after.”

“Should I come back to see you? Or would you rather I didn’t?”

“I’ll think about it and get back to you,” he said. “I might need the company to keep from going crazy. The doctor says I can’t phase until he gives the okay—it might mess up the way the bones are set.” Jacob made a face.

“Be good and do what Carlisle tells you to do. You’ll get well faster.”

“Sure, sure.”

“I wonder when it will happen,” I said. “When the right guy is going to catch your eye.”

“Don’t get your hopes up, Beau.” Jacob sighed. “Though I’m sure it would be a relief for you.”

“Maybe, maybe not. As long as you were happy, I’d be happy.” I tried to smile. “I probably won’t think anyone is ever good enough for you. I wonder how jealous I’ll be.”

“That part might be kind of fun,” he admitted.

“Let me know if you want me to come back, and I’ll be here,” I promised.

With a sigh, he turned his cheek toward me.

I leaned in, then hesitated. I took a deep breath and put my hand on his face, turning him to look at me. I leaned in and kissed him, one last time, on the lips.

“Love you, Jacob.”

“Love you more.”

He watched me walk out of his room with an unfathomable expression in his black eyes.

#Eclipse Revamped #3.26 #The Twilight Saga Revamped #Jacob Black #Beau Swan #Edward Cullen

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justanothercinemaniac · 7 years

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Epic Movie (Re)Watch #200 - The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: Blu-ray

1) The prologue.

This first scene of the last film does a number of things well. For one, Sméagol suddenly becomes a much more sympathetic and tragic character. We see how happy this creature was before being corrupted by the evil of the ring; before becoming Gollum. And that’s the other thing this scene does well: we understand better than ever how evil the ring is. How quickly it can turn good people bad. This sets the stakes high for the final chapter of the trilogy. Originally meant for The Two Towers, its inclusion in this film works so much better I think. Also it’s worth noting that the transformation from practical Gollum makeup to CG is seamless and visceral.

2) I love how freaking angry Gimli gets upon running into Merry & Pippin alive (after searching so desperately for them in Two Towers) before being tempted by what they’re smoking.

3) It’s worth noting that I HAVE watched the extended editions of all three films and while I usually forget about the scenes added in those versions, Saruman’s death scene (which is cut in this film) is always one I miss. It is a nice note of finality for such a major character in the trilogy.

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4) Much as this film really covers Frodo’s eventual corruption by the ring, Aragorn’s journey is also complete. Over the course of the trilogy we see him go from a loner who wants nothing to do with leadership into the king of men. This film is very much about Aragorn accepting that part of himself, becoming the leader he was always meant to be, and we see it in many little ways. He takes a moment for himself to respect those fallen before celebrating a victory, he imparts wisdom onto Gandalf, he earns the trust of Théoden, later honors his promise to the ghost soldiers even though he could’ve used them as a weapon, and leads his army into battle in an effort to give Frodo the time he needs. By the time the credits role Aragorn fully embraces his duty as king and that’s a wonderful transformation to watch.

5) Have I mentioned I low-key ship Sam and Frodo?

Frodo: “I need you on my side.”

Sam: “I’m always on your side, Mr. Frodo.”

6) The last film very much covered Merry’s maturity, becoming invested in the war (which guides his actions in this film as well). In Return of the King we get to see Pippin grow more as a person. We see him go from a someone who doesn’t think before he acts (like when he looks into the orb and risks alerting Sauron about Frodo) to someone with deep sorrow who takes responsibility for his actions (such as when he pledges his allegiance to the Stewart of Gondor because he feels responsible for Boromir’s death). It’s a nice subplot for the film.

7) Can I just say: Théoden can be a real idiot.

Théoden [about Gondor]: “Tell me: why should we ride to the aid of those who did not come to ours?”

Dude, you made SUCH a big deal about not asking for Gondor’s aid in the last movie when you were heavily advised to do just that. And now you’re getting pissy because they didn’t give you something you said you didn’t want?

8) While Sam and Frodo’s kinship is wicked strong, that’s not to undersell how deeply connected Merry and Pippin are. They’re great friends and the sadness of their goodbye as Gandalf takes Pippin to Gondor speaks to that.

9) Okay, can I just say something? There are only three named female characters in these films I can think of who have lines: Arwen, Galadriel, and Éowyn. They’re all awesome, they’re all great. They never EVER interact with each other and while we understand both Arwen and Galadriel are dangerous women it’s only Éowyn who gets to fight in the war. And I get the books were published in the 50s and everything but come on. Some changes to improve on female presence wouldn’t kill the movie.

10)

Arwen [about Aragorn]: “If I leave him now, I will regret it forever.”

And that’s literal, because elves are immortal. I just wanted to point that out.

11) John Noble as Denethor.

While there is initially a bit of sympathy for the stewart of Gondor because he’s mourning his son Boromir, wow is that lost quickly. I am rooting for this guy to die harder than I am any other character in this series because he is such a raging asshole. I think he’s supposed to be and John Noble plays him in a very interesting way. Much like Imelda Staunton was great at making us hate Doloris Umbridge in Harry Potter, John Noble is great at making Denethor a selfish, arrogant, cruel bastard who I just want to punch in his fucking permanent scowl of a face. HE FUCKING ADMITS THAT HE WISHES FARAMIR WERE DEAD INSTEAD OF BOROMIR! I just…yeah, I’m glad when this jackass dies.

12) The Dead City always reminded me a little of the Emerald City from The Wizard of Oz. Or is that just me?

13) I apologize for this in advance.

Frodo [when he feels the Witch King near, who stabbed him in Fellowship]: “I can feel his blade.”

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

14) At first I questioned the need to include Faramir’s skirmish with the orcs, but for one thing it shows the continued darkness which spreads across Middle Earth as well as the scale of this war. Not to mention it feeds directly into a conflict between Faramir and his jackass dad.

15) I love Éowyn, which I said as much in the last recap. But in this film she is just so freaking ready to fight for those she loves, to stand up against evil even though the sexism of Middle Earth tries to keep her off the battlefield. But she doesn’t and we get the best moment in the whole trilogy. More on that later.

16) When I was younger I never really understood why Frodo believes Sam actually stole the bread, why he sends Sam away. But now I get just how great a manipulator Gollum is and how dark the ring can be on Frodo’s soul. Gollum knows EXACTLY what the ring is doing to him, the little things it whispers to him, the greed and mistrust which is taking him. He knows because he spent (I think) five hundred years under that very same influence. He knows what Frodo is going through better than anyone which he manipulates to his advantage.

17) Sean Astin just freaking shines with his breakdown after Frodo sends him away breaks up with him (you know, after refusing to give Sam a ring). He’s come so far, sacrificing his very life, to make sure Mr. Frodo stays safe and trying to make sure the ring doesn’t take him. And he’s ALWAYS on Frodo’s side, he always trusts Frodo. But Frodo can’t do the same thing for Sam. In fact, he does the complete opposite and distrusts him so deeply he tries to get rid of him. And it’s based on NOTHING, just the manipulations of a fiend and the darkness of the ring. Astin i just so great and conveying how heavy this is on Sam, I love it.

18) Ah, the song.

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First of all, Billy Boyd’s vocals are just absolutely amazing here. They infuse the song with such grand heartache which helps it set the tone for Faramir’s attack on the orc troops. This isn’t a grand action scene, this isn’t a heroic triumph, this is a heartbreaking suicide mission made because of a son wanting to earn the love of his soulless father. And that’s why the song works as well as it does. It sets a beautiful tone.

19) Honestly, a few of these notes are just going to be me acknowledging awesome Éowyn is.

Éowyn [after some troops laugh at Merry for wanting to fight]: “Why can he not fight for those he loves?”

20) The scene where Aragorn takes the sword from Elrond is a great moment. The music, Aragorn’s demeanor, the subtleties of the cinematography, the visual of Aragorn taking the sword, it all just makes it feel like a real hero’s moment.

21) While the extended edition of this film may have some more Legolas & Gimli moments (there’s this wonderful drinking competition they get into), the bromance of the entire trio is still something I love.

Gimli [after Aragorn tries going into the dead mountain alone]: “You might as well accept it: we’re going with you, laddie.”

22) Merry is told he can’t go into battle by Théoden, that no one will carry him on their horse. Meanwhile Éowyn - who was basically told to stay at home and look after things while the men fight - says, “Screw that,” and takes Merry into battle herself. I LOVE ÉOWYN!

23) The scene with the ghosts and the dead mountain is truly eerie. Peter Jackson’s roots as a horror director really shine through in this wonderfully creepy scene and place. It’s just chilling.

24) In the long running list of why Denethor is a piece of shit: he is so freaking eager for Faramir to be dead and to have some man pain he doesn’t even check his pulse! Then he bitches about not getting help from Rohan which HE DIDN’T EVEN WANT and then gives up. Thank god for Gandalf.

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25) The initial battle of Gondor has a nice sense of scale and stakes to it, especially when we see it through the eyes of Pippin. There’s this constant sense of dread and hardship which builds tension nicely.

26) I’m not talking about the spider scene because I always hide behind my hands when that scene is going on. I fucking hate spiders, guys. I hate them. It’s a miracle I didn’t just straight up fast forward past all the spider stuff. AND IT JUST KEEPS COMING BACK! You think the spider is gone but then no, it comes back for one last attack! ENOUGH WITH THE SPIDER ALREADY!

27) Gollum is totally done with the manipulation, the tricks, all of it. As soon as Frodo reveals his intention is to destroy the ring, he loses it and just is going to solve his problem with brute force. This doesn’t really work for him though.

28) Awww, Sam comes back to rescue his boyfriend only to think he’s dead.

Sam: “Don’t leave me here alone. Don’t go where I can’t follow.”

29) A coincidence to get the character in trouble helps move the plot along. Such as when the orcs show up RIGHT AFTER Frodo gets paralyzed so they can easily capture him.

30) Through a strong sense of visuals there is a nice feeling of hope when Rohan shows up to participate in the battle of Gondor. The build up to that and the fact we see it via Merry and Éowyn works REALLY well because they - like the audience - are both new to this.

31) I always liked that Gandalf is willing to leave the main battle to save Faramir, because isn’t that what this is all about? Saving as much life as we can.

32) There are few film deaths which are quite as satisfying to me as Denethor’s death. I won’t include it hear but those who have seen the movie know exactly what happens. Know if you seek it out it does involve fire (so if that triggers you maybe best to stay away).

33) Once the freaking elephants show up to battle you KNOW this shit is epic. One thing this film does best out of all three is its battle sequences are amazing. They may be long, but they are choreographed interestingly and use a strong sense of action = reaction to them. They’re epic and totally amazing.

34) I do have a bit of a fear of death, so Gandalf’s words to Merry always bring me calm.

Gandalf [after Merry says he can’t believe it’s going to end like this]: “End? No, the journey doesn’t end here. Death is just another path we must all take.”

35) THE BEST FREAKING MOMENT IN THE ENTIRE FREAKING TRILOGY! If you only watch one moment from The Lord of the Rings, make sure you watch this one. This is all you need to see. This is beautiful and I love it and it’s awesome. Watch it! Watch it now!

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FUCKING ÉOWYN VERSUS THE FUCKING WITCH KING! YES! You can see she’s TOTALLY scared but that doesn’t matter at all. She works through the fear, she fights this mythical creature who is supposedly un-killable AND SHE FUCKING KILLS HIM! It’s either him or her uncle and damn it’s sure as hell not going to be her uncle! It is glorious. I cheer every time. I love it. Best moment in the trilogy. No contest. Done.

36) There is this tone shift in the battle of Gondor once Legolas and Gimli start their contest.

Gimli: “There’s plenty [of the enemy] for the both of us, may the best dwarf win.”

They bring out an intense amount of fun to the battle which just has you cheering them on. Cheering on the victory! I mean, LEGOLAS TAKES DOWN A FREAKING ELEPHANT!

Gimli: “THAT STILL COUNTS AS ONE!”

I love it.

37) Again, I apologize for this in advance.

Orc [about to kill Frodo]: “I’m going to stick you like a stuffed pig.”

Sam [killing the orc]: “Not if I stick you first.”

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

38) It is always important that characters not be passive. Them making a choice is interesting. So even when Frodo is at a point where he can easily STOP carrying the ring and let Sam carry it, but he CHOSES not to, that’s interesting. It speaks to his character.

Frodo: “You must understand: the ring is my burden.”

39) This is one of my favorite things to hit the internet in 2012. It’s so random and weird I love it.

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40) The moment when Aragorn really becomes the king of men is when he rallies his troops to fight against Sauron. He takes his role as leader seriously and he’s damn good at it.

Aragorn: “I see in your eyes the same fear which would take the heart in me!”

He relates to them, he lets them know he’s afraid, but his bravery inspires bravery in others. That’s what a good leader does. They speak of hope and unity against hatred, they don’t encourage it. They don’t divide people, they bring them together.

41) Have I mentioned I love Legolas and Gimli’s bromance?

Gimli: “Who thought I’d die fighting side by side with an elf?”

Legolas: “How about side by side with a friend?”

Gimli: “Aye. I can do that.”

42) Frodo is literally pushed past his physical limits, unable to climb any further up Mount Doom to destroy the ring. But he HAS to. That’s high stakes. Forgoing physical needs for the goal is the highest stakes imaginable. And also: HELL YEAH, SAMWISE GAMGEE!

Sam: “I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you!”

43) Can I just say: I will never truly wrap my mind around the super convenient giant eagles which show up at the last minute. Like, maybe there’s an explanation for this in the books, but wouldn’t the eagles have helped out A LOT MORE before this final battle? I mean really. What’s with this Deus Ex Machina stuff?

44) The scene where Frodo decides to keep the ring visually matches the one where Isildur did the same thing in Fellowship, meaning the seeds for this were planted in the trilogy from film one. It’s smart planning and helps make the choice all the stronger. We’ve seen the consequences of this action once, but again? Oh man, that could be disastrous.

45) You can really see the influence the ring had on Frodo when this is the first thing he says after it’s destroyed.

Frodo: “I can see the shire.”

Frodo talked about how he couldn’t remember it before, while he was carrying the ring. But now it’s gone and he can. I love that.

46) One of my favorite moments in the series is when Frodo wakes up in Rivendale with Gandalf standing at his bead. Remember, Frodo thinks Gandalf is DEAD from the first film. So not only is there the joy at his own survival but that of his friend too. And you can see it on Elijah Wood’s face.

47) This film has A LOT of endings. Like, it takes 20 minutes to end. But I like each and every one. Firstly, this massive respect the hobbits are paid.

Aragorn [king of men, to the hobbits]: “My friends. You bow to no one.”

[Aragorn bows, then so does literally EVERYONE else]

48) The Shire still brings about the same sense of peace it did in Fellowship. You know you’re really out of danger when you are in that place. The tension defuses and it feels like…home. It’s worth noting that the hobbits at first have nothing to talk about while at the bar. They just sit there in silence because…what is there to say?

49) The final goodbye.

I may not be the best to pick up on subtext, but even I get that this boat into the West is meant to represent the afterlife. That Bilbo, Gandalf, and Frodo are all going into the afterlife (even though I always forget that Gandalf leaves). This is honestly not only the most fitting ending to the story, but for Frodo’s character as a whole. There’s no way Frodo could’ve just gone home after all that evil. He couldn’t have just returned to normalcy. He’s changed too much, so he has to move on. But just because Frodo’s gone, doesn’t mean life moves on. And I think that’s one of the greatest messages this film has: even in the face of great loss, life moves on. And there is always ALWAYS hope.

50) And I think instead of analyzing the song “Into the West” I’ll just leave you all with a link to listen to it because it’s a wonderful piece.

The Return of the King is everything fans loved about the first two Lord of the Rings films dialed up all the way. The stakes are at their highest, the battles are at their most epic, the performances are incredible, and the characters finally reach the end of the journey they started at the beginning of this film. Winning Best Picture at the Oscars the year it was nominated, this film definitely deserves it and is worth the watch (even if it is a long watch).

#The Lord of the Rings #Elijah Wood #Sean Astin #Viggo Mortensen #Eowyn #Epic Movie (Re)Watch #Ian McKellen #Orlando Bloom #Christopher Lee #Billy Boyd #John Noble #Miranda Otto #Andy Serkis #Yas Queen #That's What She Said #Movie #Film #GIF

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workingontruth · 5 years

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Part 6 of 7: The Gospel (In Full)...Stage 4; Command Us

October 9, 2019

[Forgive Me. Fill Me. Surrender Me. COMMAND US. Fuel Us.]

We’re making good progress into the ongoing beauty of the Gospel – what a JOY! With the controversy of self-will behind us in Stage 3, this fourth stage of The Gospel (in Full) represents a corner turned.

However, we must not simply plow onward into this fourth stage of the Christian life without honestly verifying the condition of our soul at this point on our personal journey with God in Christ.

Said in another way, if the controversy of self-will is not behind you in a way that you know the Spirit has dealt with you sufficiently unto repentance and surrender, now is not the time to “roll on.”

“Why not”, you say? “Doesn’t there come some point, Greg, where you just have to press on, regardless of whether one has been illuminated on a matter?”

The answer is NO. Not, that is, unless you’re just trying to “accomplish” your Christianity.

Let me try to tell you why–from a few slightly different vantage points.

Being “Christian” out from an unsurrendered, wrong motivation of the soul will only be an unfruitful exercise into a venture that will not “work” for you. In such a case, it’s best to stay out of it altogether.

If your motive in following Jesus is to attain “your best life now” or to somehow discover what will “work for you,” you’ll be sorely disappointed.

Instead, in bridging our 3rd to this current 4th Stage of these Gospel (In Full) contemplations, you must know the surrendered and commandable Christian life will frequently appear to fly in the face of the old man’s, earth-side logic and self-interest. And so, until you are willing to be, at times, divorced from your own logic and unmoored from self-interest, you will never become commandable. Until the clay of your life is moldable to the Potter, he won’t fight against you. Clay which only continually leaps off of the Potter’s wheel will never reach its purpose. Neither will you. Just forget it, it won’t happen.

The Christian life is one that must be accompanied by faith–a faith that trustingly walks in the mission of God even as your self-preserving interests are being daily set aside.

Stay on the Potter’s wheel. Without a surrendered, faith-filled and trusting walk with God, the first sign of difficulty will have you clutching the steering wheel of control in order to regain what you wrongly believe to be the predictable stability and comfort which you value more than the unpredictability that comes with being a disciple of Christ. This need for control will sabotage any hope of a maturing walk with God and place severe restrictions on the Holy Spirit’s ability to guide and fulfill you. For the surrendered life will be one supremely commandable by its Owner.

From another vantage point, KNOW THIS –

Being commanded by one whom you ultimately believe has no right to do so will only lead to resentment and a begrudging heart of religious frustration.

We do not need more unsurrendered “Christians” today. It will be far better for you to return to the previous stage than live detrimentally to both yourself and the body of Christ.

From still another slightly different vantage point, I want you to introspectingly consider the contemplation of Billy Graham when he said…

“…the Lord Jesus Christ will come into your life and reform, conform and transform you into an obedient follower. If that is not your desire, you have every reason to question whether or not you have been saved.”

You see, a merely strategic acceptance of truth void of a truly humble heart which pleads for God’s command over you in recognition of your inability to run the show yourself, is pointless. Even further still, if you are ready to walk in the command of King Jesus but only as a “have to” of accepted obligation, there has yet been no genuine surrender–and you have a heart issue. This should make you wonder whether or not you really have a new heart!

[If, right now, you want to address whether this new heart God offers to all who seek him is in you, it may be helpful to review the last half of Chapter 46 in my book, Set Free. Start reading at the fifteenth paragraph where it begins, “To review then,...”]

Indeed, before you will be able to enjoy the supernatural refreshment that accompanies being commanded and fueled by the Holy Spirit, our final two stages of The Gospel (in Full), surrender will have had to become part of your journey.

PAUSE to PONDER:

Have you truly surrendered your life to Christ, or have you merely desired to have the weight of your sins lifted from your conscience while also believing you’ve met the qualification for heaven as part of your portfolio?

If you have been unable to release your circumstances, your emotional anxiety, your frustration with a physical malady, or any other state in which you find yourself living, pause and return to Stage 3. More directly, retrace your steps back to the cross and decide once and for all whether you trust the one who says he alone can give you the new life you desire, lacking nothing of value either in this earth-side “pre-life” or the life to come.

I am taking this long walk around the barn before journeying with you into God’s command of your life because attempting to walk in this stage prematurely will be fruitless. Without a surrendering heart of faith and trust in God’s desire and ability to bring you into only what is best for you, it will be impossible for you to please him (Hebrews 11:6).

So, here’s my challenge going forward into these final two, ongoing and life-giving stages of the Gospel:

Refuse to read past this point right here until you have been ruthlessly and utterly honest with yourself, and marks of broken surrender have become a part of your experience.

Give the Spirit time to work.

Seek him persistently on this matter of surrender.

Ask him what you desire more than him.

Your Creator God, through his son, wants to gain in you more than cerebral add-ons of himself. He wants to remake you. He wants you to walk in obedience as he commands, and abide in his love–that your joy would be made complete (John 15:10-11).

Oh, dear friend, the best thing I could hear from anyone reading these Gospel (in Full) contemplations is that it took a month, or the summer, or the better part of a year to get through them. There is no rush. Let the Spirit take you to a place where you drink most deeply of Him unto surrender. Then you will be ready for The Commander!

All that said, let’s turn our minds and hearts to the only reasonable response of one who has surrendered his or her life to the omniscient, all-powerful King of Kings and Creator of all things past, present and future … a sincere desire to be commanded in his service.

There are two things I want to emphasize as we contemplate this fourth stage of the ongoing nature of the Gospel.

FIRST, we must begin to embrace our position in relation to God. He is Commander. We are his faithful and compliant inheritance, living a new life in Him.

God’s command of us is the beginning of an exciting adventure–one less predictable but promising far greater satisfaction than our old life of self-preservation and societal predictability.

This life of complete trust and sensitivity to the command of the Holy Spirit dwelling in us may sometimes border on what the world would inaccurately perceive to be irrationality or reckless self-neglect. This is because the life we now live ceases to be about us–it ceases to be only about our welfare. And this is very counter-cultural in our “plan-ahead, make a life and a future,” secularist mentality.

But thanks to the truth of our new identity on which we now continually dwell (Romans 5:12-6:23, Colossians 2:9-15), our old self is increasingly being translated into the life of Christ. As this happens, we have a new lens through which to live what is now God’s life – in us (Galatians 2:20).

In a phrase, if SURRENDER is the fulcrum upon which a flourishing Christian life pivots, then a natural and instinctive compliance to his COMMAND of our lives becomes the launch pad for what God intended to be the “normal” Christian life.

Indeed, in this fourth stage of The Gospel (in Full), we now turn a corner. We now begin living in our new creation not by sight, but by faith (2 Cor. 5:7). We now begin to live in the light of our new life as a surrendered yes man, without controversy.

Once we understand there is a God who is uncreated, beginningless, infinitely transcendent, who made this world, who keeps everything in the universe going such that all the molecules, all the stars, all the solar systems are being held up by the power of this God, …to this God we must say, “Command me!”

Here’s how historian N.T. Wright puts it:

“How can you live with the terrifying thought that the hurricane has become human, that fire has become flesh, that life itself became life and walked in our midst? Christianity either means that, or it means nothing. It is either the most devastating disclosure of the deepest reality of the world, or it is a sham, a nonsense, a bit of deceitful playacting. Most of us, unable to cope with saying either of those things, condemn ourselves to live in the shallow world in between.”

And this living in the shallow world in between is what must come to an end for us if we believe what we proclaim as ones redeemed into perfect relationship with the God of the universe. You cannot live in that misty “world in between” if you want to live with integrity as a Christian.

Do you pray to Jesus when you’re in trouble, and otherwise mostly ignore him because you get busy? Again says, N.T. Wright:

“Either Jesus cannot hear you because he’s not who he says he is – or if he is who he says he is, he must become the still point of your turning world, the center around which your entire life revolves.”

Yes, if God is who he says he is, and if he is whom you claim him to be as your redeemer, then your whole life has to revolve around him and you have to throw everything at his feet and say, “Command me.”

He is King. We are his beloved inheritance. And during this short time on earth, while inhabiting these bodies of flesh and living in a deteriorating world due to the effects of sin, we are called to lay down our old lives, and take his upon us–and follow him.

You see, we have a new kind of King. In Mark 8:34-9:1, Jesus is saying, “Since I am a King on a cross, if you want to follow me you must go to a cross.” In other words, you must recognize him as boss.

At this point in following Jesus, it ceases to be about us…or what we’d been conditioned to understand to be “our life.”

We must stop living in the fiction that our old man is still living, or that we own our life. It’s a lie.

Jesus went to a cross. He really died. And he tells us in Romans and again in Colossians 2 that we went there with him…IN him (Chapter 45, Set Free). And so if logic is to be our friend at some point along this path, we must embrace living in the full command of our King Jesus.

Daily we must be eager, as an overflow of our love for him, to live into our new identity. I’m not saying that we focus on carrying our cross daily. I think that’s a bit distorted to be honest with you. What we’re doing is REMEMBERING that our old man has DIED on that same self-cross in Christ Jesus–and we’re remembering to live in the new man, the new creation, as ones who are no longer in charge…we are now under the full command of King Jesus.

SECOND, at this point in our development as a Christian, it also becomes helpful to radically change the way we speak and think about ourselves.

At this point in our development as a Christian, we must continually reckon upon the fact that we never walk alone.

Why? Because as we ask God to command us, and he begins to do so, He may ask of us things we may feel unresourced to do. In such moments, we must remember in whom we now live and breathe and walk.

Too many Christians live as if the sky is falling and all hope is lost–at the drop of a hat! I believe this is because we retreat far too easily into our own resourcing, the resourcing of the old man or woman whom Christ himself has killed off and laid to rest in an eternal grave.

Take notice that I changed the pronouns in the final two stages of The Gospel (in Full). Why? Let me explain.

One of the things that began to transform my life is when I started to think in the “we, us and our,” rather than in the “I, me and my.” To think in the “we, us and our,” is not only healthy, it’s reality.

Let me demonstrate the difference:

If I’m fooled into believing that I am alone in the midst of life’s challenges, I would be tempted to self-talk in the following way:

If I say, “I’m afraid I won’t make it next year!”

Or if I think, “I don’t know what to do!”

Or what if I’m going through a terrifically difficult circumstance and say, “I honestly don’t think I can make it through this! I am going to die!”

Do these singular “I, me or my” perspectives convey reality for believers in Christ, or are they “old man” thinking?

Now, let’s try these same real and disheartening circumstances in the “we”:

“Lord Jesus, we are so afraid we won’t make it!”

He will say, “Really? I think we will.”

“This circumstance is just too difficult! We don’t know what to do!”

But Jesus says, “I think I do know what to do.”

“We aren’t going to make it–we will die!”

And Jesus says, “Really? I was raised to life again.”

Suddenly, everything is totally different, isn’t it? Do you see it?

Where is Jesus living? If you’re a born-again believer in Jesus Christ, he is living inside you. You are not alone. You do not fight alone. You do not walk alone. You do not sleep or eat or drive alone.

When we begin to take stock of our true condition as a child of God, as one possessing the life and resources of the risen Christ Jesus, everything changes!

I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. – Galatians 2:20

You are always at least two.

Dwelling on these truths of the Christian life makes us choose.

“Am I going to live in the truth of who I have become in Christ, or will I choose to live in a lie–under the influence of Satan, the father of lies?”

When you begin your day, do you say, “I’m going to my first meeting for the day…” or do you say, “Let’s go to our first meeting for the day…”? The second one is the truth. The first is a lie.

Thus, this fourth stage of the ongoing nature of the Good News is purposely in the plural “us.” Whatever he commands of us, we can know he is able to do in us, for he himself is able to finish the good work he began in us (Phil. 1:6).

Get used to inquiring of God, listening and seeking him through the pages of his good news in the Bible…and thanking him ahead of time for providing in you the ability to do whatever he asks. For once you have surrendered the short-sighted, comfort-seeking desires of your old self whom God has put to death in Christ, in favor of the new self, being continually transformed by the renewal of your mind with what is true of you (Romans 12:2), then you will eagerly, satisfyingly and joyously be commandable by the God in whom you have believed, and who is able to guard you until the day of your ultimate renewal (I Timothy 1:12,14).

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” – Isaiah 6:8

Isaiah got it. I pray you and I so live in the truth of who we are that we, too, will live commandable lives.

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reesebird · 5 years

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New Post has been published on https://reesebird.com/2019/01/19/raising-christian-children-part-4-plan-family-activities-that-include-your-children/

Raising Christian Children Part 4: Plan Family Activities That Include Your Children

It may just be me, but it seems as though times have changed so much since the last generation of parents raised their children. It is so disheartening to see, read, and hear about children committing crimes are younger; children without both parents in the home more common. What is happening to our society?

I read a transcript of a sermon by the Rev. Billy Graham from a message given about 20 years ago. In that message he outlined six steps that is followed would help keep children from getting into trouble. In this series of articles I am covering each of those six steps. I do hope that you will follow each article and I further hope that these articles will bless you and your family as you strive to raise christian children. Here is Step #4.

Plan Family Activities That Include Your Children

It is amazing to me that families are doing less activities that include the children. The parents seem to be just as socially active, but baby sitters are being hired more and more to take care of children while the parents pursue their desire to “get away”. Are we to believe that they mean by this that they want to “get away” from their children? Unfortunately, the answer is a resounding YES!. How sad. And we wonder why families grow further apart as the children age.

When parents realize that they are getting away from involving their children in family activities they will realize that the main reason is their attitude towards raising children. When they brought their children into this wonderful world, they brought along with them the responsibility to give their children the very best of themselves. To give to their children the love and attention they so deserve and at the same time give them a family that does things together. Please don’t mistake activities to mean, as one mother expressed to me, “Our family does everything together: my husband takes my son to soccer practice three days a week; I take my oldest daughter to dance classes every week; and five days a week my husband drops our baby off at day care and I pick her up. We do everything together.” No, I didn’t give her a definition of “together”, I was too shocked to even respond to her statement. But hopefully, those reading this article are in agreement with me that this example does not meet the definition of a family doing activities that involve the children that is referred to in this article.

Proverbs 22:6 – Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Here Solomon issues a bold challenges, particularly to those who are parents and instructors of children, to the propagating of wisdom, that it may not die with them. Train up children to prepare them for what they are designed for. Train them up, not in the way they WOULD go, but in the way they SHOULD go, the way in which, if you love them, you would have them go. It is true that many children indeed have departed from the good way in which they were trained up; Solomon himself did so. But the early training they received from their parents may be a means of their recovering themselves, as it is supposed Solomon did. At least the parents will have the comfort of knowing they have done their duty and used the appropriate means.

In planning activities that include your children your should first, consider the developmental levels of your children, then plan your activities based on individual maturity level. You can try more challenging activities to encourage them to progress, but remember that you want them to be successful at the activities. You certainly do not want them to get frustrated or bored with the activity. Also remember that your goals for each of your children may be very different. Family activities may be either 1) activities in and around the home or 2) activities that are part of a vacation. Either way, planning those activities for and with your children will make them feel more an integral art of the family.

Here are some suggested activities that we found both fun and beneficial for our children.

Activities In And Around The Home When planning activities in and around the home it will require some sacrifices of time on the part of everyone in the family. Mom and Dad (assuming both work) are usually tired by the time they get home from work, eat dinner (supper for those of you in the south) and hopefully have a little time to relax. But your number one priority should still be your children. Why not set some evenings of the week for family activities (other than taking your kids to sports practice, dance lessons, music lessons, etc.)?

The number of children you have and their ages will dictate what activities will work best for your family. The listed examples we what we used for our family which included three children: 12-year old son, 8-year old son, and 4-year old daughter.

We planned our family evening activities around our children’s activity schedules and usually had two or three nights a week for family fun. Ideally, every night could be used for some type of family activity, but that is not being realistic in today’s busy world. For this article let us assume that you do have every evening available for a family activity is case your are blessed.

In our family, Wednesday night was set aside for church service. During the school year, we had to be very flexible. Not every activity had all the kids involved due to various amounts of homework. During summer vacation time, more consistency in full participation was possible. Exception: our 12-year old was the star pitcher on his baseball team and they played several night a week until the All-Star team lost in the regional tournament. Here is a sample of our family activities in and around the home would ideally be:

Monday evenings: Family Scrapbook Night We put a lot of value in keeping our family scrapbooks. We had a separate scrapbook for each child and one for the family (we also had a scrapbook that was reserved for our family history: genealogy research). This may seem like “over kill” to some, but now that our children are grown, those scrapbooks are priceless to them. As each child left home, they took their individual scrapbook with them. We kept the “family” scrapbook and it stays on our living room coffee table as a proud reminder of our children’s lives from birth to present. We are still adding pages: GRANDCHILDREN!

Tuesday evenings: Family Game Night Our family really enjoyed game night. It gave us as parents a way to teach our children the importance of being both a good loser and a good winner. We live in a competitive world and as our children enter into that competitive world they need to be prepared for winning and losing and how to handle both in a christian manner. We would choose games that would involve our 4-year old. She loved Skip Bo as she loved to count. Yahtzee was another game that gave our 4-year old lots of enjoyment. Our boys even enjoyed picking up the dice when she would throw them across the table and onto the floor. Lots of good laughs: lots of fun for all.

Wednesday evenings: Church Night Where we attend church they have classes divided up in age groups so each of our children have their own class to attend where they not only grow their faith, but grow many friendships.

Thursday evenings: Food Fight Night Just kidding, but hopefully I have your attention now. Thursday evenings we work together as a family in the preparation of a special meal that has been planned (the week before) by our children. We allow them to decide the menu for a four-course meal and then we divide up the preparation appropriately. For example, we do not our 4-year old to handle hot items like boiling water or deep frying. (I guess I just have a dislike for emergency rooms.) One of the kids favorite menus was: 1st course of an appetizer (in this case cheese bread; 2nd course of mixed salad; 3rd course of spaghetti and meatballs; 4th course Italian doughnuts “Sfinci”. Assignments: 1st course – our 8-year old; 2nd course – My wife and our 4-year old (talk about your “tossed” salad); 3rd course – me and our 12-year old (he really got good at meatballs!); 4th course – everybody. When meal preparation was over the kitchen did indeed look like we had a food fight. Great fun except for when it came time for clean up. But again, a great teaching tool for seeing a task through to completion.

Friday evenings: Football Game/Family Reading Night During football season, we would go as a family to the local school’s football game. On the Friday evenings that the team was out of town we had our family reading time. We encouraged our children to read not only during this time, but whenever they had some free time. We would allow our children to chose a book to read and then involve everyone who could read to take their turn reading. As the years have passed we look back on our reading nights as special night of bonding as a family. Many of the books we read came from “Hooked On Phonics” material. We were very impressed with the entire “Hooked On Phonics” program. It deserves most of the credit for developing the reading skills in our children and their developing a love of reading.

Saturdays: Arts & Crafts /Community Service Day As a family we are arts minded. My wife is an excellent artist, I have performed as a member of several symphony orchestras. We encourage our children to pursue their individual interests in the arts. One project we used to lead into activities that are part of a vacation is the creation of a Family Vacation Savings Box. We used a “cigar” box with our kids, but I have not seen a cigar box in years, so any sturdy box about the size of a cigar box should work fine. We decorated the box with pictures of the places we want to visit on our next family vacation. We tape it shut and cut a slot in the top. As a family we developed several strategies for having money available to actually place in our savings box. One that my 8-year old suggested was to take the money we saved using coupons for food purchases. He had helped his mother cut out lots of coupons so it is easy to see why he would suggest this. His mother and I agreed. Our 12-year old placed half of what he earned mowing lawns in the neighborhood. He currently is the leading salesman for a cell phone company and his experience early might have lead to this success. He informed all his customers how he was using half his earnings for helping with the family vacation fund and his client list grew over the years. Challenge your children to help save for the family vacations. You will be as amazed as we were how much more enjoyable the family vacations became.

As a family we are community service minded. Through our church we volunteer as a family to visit nursing homes, help with church and community events, and help many elderly or handicapped church members who need assistance with various tasks such as mowing lawns, cleaning their home, or preparing a healthy meal and taking it to their home. We wanted our children to grow to be caring and unselfish individuals. As we look back at those times we realize how close we became as a family because of our participating as a family in these activities. At first our children were not excited about “helping” other people, but after a very short time, the attitude changed. After each volunteering activity we would have a family meal at a local restaurant. We used the time during the meal to discuss how it made each of us feel to do what we had done. Our children would always mention “warm fuzzy” as a feeling after seeing the smile on the faces of the people we assisted. When we finally returned home we all felt a sense of accomplishment. Of all our volunteer activities, visiting nursing homes was our most memorable. You could see the appreciation in the faces of those wonderful people with whom we were privileged to spend some time getting to know.

Sundays: Church was our primary activity every Sunday. Being able to attend the church of our choice as a family gave spiritual strength to us as individuals and as a family. Worshiping together with our friends was a special time for our family. A time of spiritual growth and appreciation for each other as part of a loving and caring family. After most Sunday services we either had been invited to one of our friends’ homes for lunch or we had invited guests to join us at our home for lunch. Either way, it was a continuation of sharing with other people with like interests and our children strengthened friendships with our guests children. Sundays were truly a blessed day for our entire family.

Activities That Are Part Of A Vacation

So as not to turn this post into the length of a major novel, I will just simply state that the planning of our vacations were done by everyone in our family. It was our goal as parents to choose a vacation location that could be fun for every member of the family. We never had unlimited funds for vacations, but you would have thought by the stories our children tell of our trips that we did. The “Family Vacation Savings Box” money was dedicated to our children’s entertainment and their souvenir purchases. Also, to conserve funds, we tried to plan a vacation route that would include areas where we could visit relatives. (Our adult children now refer to our vacations as “Family Tree Vacations”) This served a dual purpose: saved us money on motels and gave us time to visit with family members we had not seen in several years. As an added plus we could also gather updates for our family history scrapbook.

We live in what is referred to as the Midwest section of the United States. Most of our family live in Tennessee, Oklahoma, and Texas. Two of our favorite destinations were Nashville, Tennessee and San Antonio, Texas. We had numerous activity choices in both. When we went to Nashville, we routed through Kansas City as our 12-year old was a fan of the Kansas City Royals baseball team. So, he wanted to go to a baseball game. Our 8-year old was taking guitar lessons, so he wanted to go to the “Grand Ole Opry” in Nashville. Being as both locations had theme parks, our 4-year old was quite satisfied to ride anything that was slow. My wife and I enjoyed all the selections our children made, we had to as they put up with our visiting the relatives on both sides of the family.

It is my hope that this article will encourage you, the reader, to start involving your children in your activity planning if you don’t do so already. If you are including your children in your activity planning, may this article give you some ideas to give your activities some variety. Raising christian children is such a challenge in today’s world. We as parents should be challenged to find as many methods as we can to involve our children in wholesome activities that will encourage them to consistently keep their focus on things eternal. May God bless your and your family!

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happyweddingblogs · 4 years

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150 Funny Marriage Quotes for Newlyweds

If you are looking for some hilarious marriage quotes to add fun element to your wedding, then this post is for you. Here we are sharing 150 funny marriage quotes for you that you can use in your wedding invites, wedding signage, and wedding social media updates.

Source: Happy Wedding App

Let’s get started…….

1. “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” —Henny Youngman

2. “The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing – and then marry him.” —Cher

3. “Love is one long sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock!” — Zeenat Essa

4. “In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice which is still very much practiced.” —Helen Rowland

5. “Many people spend more time in planning the wedding than they do in planning the marriage.” — Zig Ziglar TC mark

6. “Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.” — Will Ferrell

7. “The most important four words for a successful marriage: ‘I’ll do the dishes.’” — Anonymous

8. “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” — Socrates

9. “When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” — Prince Philip

10. “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner

11. “Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.” — Jewish Proverb

12. “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.” — Albert Einstein

13. “There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.” — Oscar Wilde

14. “All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.” — Red Skelton

15. “Take care of him. And make him feel important. And if you can do that, you’ll have a happy and wonderful marriage. Like two out of every ten couples.” — Neil Simon

16. “Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” — Ambrose Bierce

17. “Marriage is like a deck of cards. All you need in the beginning is two hearts and a diamond. After 10 years you need a club and spade.” — Carrie

18. “Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences.” —Isadora Duncan

19. “A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.” — Michel de Montaigne

20. “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.” — Benjamin Franklin

21. “A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” — NOT A BOOK

22. “The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.” — Ann Bancroft

23. “Marriage must incessantly contend with a monster that devours everything: familiarity.” — Honore de Balzac

24. “A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.” — Michel de Montaigne

25. “Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else in the house.” —Jean Kerr

26. “To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.” — Ogden Nash

27. “I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.” — Steven Wright

28. “Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.” — Rita Rudner

29. “Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree and woman gets her master’s degree.” — Rama Kochhar

30. “When you have a baby, love is automatic, when you get married, love is earned.” —Marie Osmond

31. “Marriage – a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.” — Beverley Nichols

32. “Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.” — G. K. Chesterton

33. “Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.” — Stephen Leacock

34. “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” — Erma Bombeck

35. “All marriages are happy. It’s the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.” — Raymond Hull

36. “Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings … and lawyers.” — Richard Pryor

37. “If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.” — Sam Levenson

38. “They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake.” — Alexander Pope

39. “Marriage is an attempt to solve problems together which you didn’t even have when you were on your own.” — Eddie Cantor

40. “An ideal wife is any woman who has an ideal husband.” — Booth Tarkington

41. “Never get married in college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.” — Elbert Hubbard

42. “Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” — Natasha Leggero

43. “I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life” — Anonymous

44. “I married beneath me, all women do.” — Nancy Astor

45. “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not.” — Albert Einstein

46. “In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.” — Woody Allen

47. “Marriage is like a game of chess, except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome.” — Jerry Seinfeld

48. “Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.” — Marilyn Monroe

49. “Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories.” — John Wilmot

50. “Marriage is a difficult project. When seven years have passed and all your body’s cells have been replaced, you’re meant to experience that seven-year itch.” — Yoko Ono

Also See:

Best 75 Wedding Love Quotes

51. “You can’t buy love on eBay.” — Anonymous

52. “Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.” — H.L. Mencken

53. “Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted the whole day.” — Mickey Rooney

54. “My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.” — Rodney Dangerfield

55. “Marry a man your own age; As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.” — Phyllis Diller

56. “Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.” — Helen Rowland

57. “Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is the bicycle repair kit.” — Billy Connolly

58. “The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.” — Ratna Deep

59. “More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.” — Doug Larson

60. “Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” — Albert Einstein

61. “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” — Erma Bombeck

62. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” — Will Ferrell

63. “You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.” — Henny Youngman

64. “The brain is the most outstanding organ. It works 24/7, 365 from birth until you fall in love.” —Sophie Monroe

65. “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” — Charles M. Schulz

66. “Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.” — Evelyn Hendrickson

67. “True love is like seeing ghosts; we all talk about it, but few of us have ever seen one.” — La Rochefoucauld

68. “True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” — Erich Segal

69. “Where love is the case, the doctor is an ass.” — English Proverb

70. “The best thing to ever happen to marriage is the pause-live-TV button.” — Rick Reilly

71. “I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?” — Jean Illsley Clarke

72. “A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him.” — Brendan Francis

73. “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.” — Benjamin Franklin

74. “Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one.” — Fran Lebowitz

75. “Besides chocolate, you’re my favourite.” — Anonymous

76. “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” — Richard Jeni

77. “Marriage is like watching the color of leaves in the fall; ever changing and more stunningly beautiful with each passing day.” — Fawn Weaver 78. “Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” — George Burns

79. “Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” — Thomas Dewar

80. “My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked.” — Winston Churchill

81. “I’m going to get married again because I’m more mature now, and I need some kitchen stuff.” —Wendy Liebman

82. “Love is a lot like a backache; It doesn’t show up on X-Rays, But you know it’s there.” — George Burns

83. “We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops” — Henny Youngman

84. “They say love is blind…and marriage is an institution. Well, I’m not ready for an institution for the blind just yet.” — Mae West

85. “I love you like a fat kid loves cake.” — Quote from 50 Cents

86. “Men aren’t necessities, they’re luxuries.” — Cher

87. “What’s the best way to get your husband to remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.” — Cindy Garner

88. “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” — Groucho Marx

89. “They say true love hides behind every corner, I must be walking in circles.” — Anonymous

90. “Trust your husband, adore your husband, and get as much as you can in your own name.” — Joan Rivers

91. “If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.” — Katharine Hepburn

92. “My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food. She goes on tuesdays, I go Fridays.” — Henry Youngman

93. “If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears.” — Sigmund Freud

94. “Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park.” — Anonymous

95. “For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.” — Catherine Zeta-Jones

96. “Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.” — H. L. Mencken

97. “Before we got married, I caught her in my arms. Now I catch her in my pockets.” — Anonymous

98. “My wife, Mary, and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.” — Jack Benny

99. “Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.” — Woody Allen

100. “I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.” — Steve Martin

101. “Remember that creating a successful marriage is like farming: You have to start over again every morning.” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

102. “Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” — Ambrose Bierce

103. “Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join.” — Elbert Hubbard

104. “The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.” — Woody Allen

105. “Marriage marks the end of many short follies – being one long stupidity.” — Friedrich Nietzsche

106. “An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” — Agatha Christie

107 “I love you even when I’m really, really hungry” — Anonymous

108. “Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.” — Cathy Carlyle

109. “The four most important words in any marriage…”I’ll do the dishes.” — Anonymous

110. “Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it’s one of the best.” —Woody Allen

111. “All marriages are happy. It’s trying to live together afterwards that causes all the problems.” —Shelley Winters

112. “If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” — Lily Tomlin

113. “Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.” — Ogden Nash

114. “Marriage is like vitamins: We supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” —Anonymous

115. “Love is a grave mental disease.” — Plato

116. “Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else.” — Jean Kerr

117. “A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.” — Zsa Zsa Gabor

118. “Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.” — Joan Crawford

119. “Love is not having to hold in your farts anymore.” — Bree Luckey

120. “When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the one that’s mad.” — Helen Rowland

121. “It’s been so long since I made love, I can’t even remember who gets tied up.” — Joan Rivers

122. “Love is the seventh sense, which destroys all the other six senses.” — Anonymous

123. “Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.” — Joyce Brothers

124. “A good marriage is one where each partner secretly suspects they got the better deal.” — Anonymous

125. “People should fall in love with their eyes closed.” — Andy Warhol

126. “The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.” — Groucho Marx

127. “In marriage do thou be wise: prefer the person before money virtue before beauty, the mind before the body, then thou hast a wife, a friend, a companion, a second self.” — William Penn

128. “Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener” — Pauline Thomason

129. “Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.” — Helen Gurley Brown

130. “Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.” — Anonymous

131. “Marriage is a great institution for those who like institutions.” — Tommy Dewar

132. “I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soulmate – but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza.” — Alf Whit

133. “My most brilliant achievement was my ability to persuade my wife to marry Me.” — winston-churchill

134. “If I get married, I want to be very married.” — Audrey Hepburn

135. “It is impossible to love and be wise.” — Francis Bacon

136. “Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.” — Joseph Barth

137. “Marriage is a risk; I think it’s a great and glorious risk, as long as you embark on the adventure in the same spirit.” — Cate Blanchett

138. “People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.” — Bob Hope

139. “To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.” — Mark Twain

140. “The highest happiness on earth is marriage.” — William Lyon Phelps

141. “What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.” — Pearl Bailey

142. “One should believe in marriage as in the immortality of the soul.” — Honoré de Balzac

143. “Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.” — Joyce Brothers

144. “Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill & not doing it because you’d miss them!” — Anonymous

145. “A good marriage is that in which each appoints the other the guardian of his solitude, and shows him this confidence, the greatest in his power to bestow.” — Rainer Maria Rilke

146. “Men make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.” — Anonymous

147. “To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.” — Ogden Nash

148. “Husbands are like wine, they take a long time to mature.” — From Letters to Juliet

149. “Marriage is a workshop….. Where husband works and wife shops.” — Anonymous

150. “Husbands and wives are so irritating. But without them, who would we blame for misplacing our socks?” — Janet Periat

AND FINALLY……

So, these are the funniest marriage quotes which you can use in your wedding. These marriage quotes will simply add to the fun part of your wedding. You can even make your wedding speech hilarious with these funny quotes on marriage.

Happy Wedding…..

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