#I'm so sorry Zuko this isn't your fault
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Part of me almost hopes that Viren's story arc will end in a disproportionately cruel way, you know.
I'm just so tired of seeing a character doing one good thing before they die or trying to change before they die and instead of the audience taking that as purposeful ambiguity the discussion will center around if the character was "Redeemed".
But imagine if he was punished so harshly that even the Viren haters would feel bad for him. Now that would be interesting! I've seen some dark speculation around season 5 so I'm looking forward to seeing how the show will contextualise his arc.
I don't understand why "Redemption" is such a popular talking point when centering villains (ok I actually do. I'm looking at you, Zuko).
"Sin and Atonement" and "Redemption" are deeply Christian themes. I don't think those should be a universal frame of reference to all stories.
Yes, yes, this is more of a fandom problem, not a show problem. But if people want to see a bad character harshly punished for their crimes maybe they should get that for once. I don't really mind because I think Viren, while unlikeable, is a sympathetic character already. Of course I feel for a character even if they are "irredeemable". That's what stories are for.
I don't mean it's a completely useless way to look at art but it's just- I don't know- I'm bored? Especially YouTube commentators talk about redemption constantly instead of engaging with the themes that actually are there.
Sometimes villains can't even really make up for everything they have done, just like some people in real life. Viren has committed so many crimes- like how do you even fix that? However it'd still be interesting if he tried to change. That's what I'm here for. Like Viren and Claudia are not just an antagonistic counterforce to our heros but they have a lot of going on as unique characters.
Viren has his saviour complex and values domination over cooperation. Claudia is interesting because she's both the victim and the perpetrator. It's interesting how self-sufficient she is while being deeply emotionally codependent on Viren. She has a ton of agency as a physically (magically?) strong person but not a ton of agency as an independent, emotionally strong individual. Viren and Claudia love each other but it's isolating kind of love where they don't really have anyone else but each other (Terry is really trying to get in there. Like sorry Terry you don't know how fucked up these two are lmao).
No wonder it was so easy to Aaravos take Viren's place as an authority figure in Claudia's life after Viren died. Or at least that's what I took away from Lost Child short and TDP season 4 in general.
I still think about the first information we got outside Viren and Claudia's POV about Aaravos's mirror: Runaan's warning about "A Fate Worse Than Death".
This framing device sounds really important. I've been wondering how it'll play out eventually. Is it something about Viren losing his old life he worked so hard to build, or will he lose Claudia in some metaphorical or literal way? Is it something even more personal?
Personally, I'd love to see Viren live and change as a person. There are plenty of high-fantasy male characters like him who go through that kind of transformation: Guts from Berserk, Geralt of Rivia, Jaime from GoT, Ged the Wizard... You know, characters who realise that the things they value are unsustainable or even harmful to themselves and to people around them and even to the world as a whole. Or they realise that superficial things like status and power are unfulfilling and only serve status quo. There are some parallels to toxic masculinity/ hegemonic masculinity, too.
However, I think it'd be interesting if Viren's story will be a deeply tragic one. Anyway I'm here for this.
#I'm so sorry Zuko this isn't your fault#btw great job leaving your teenage daughter alone with a scary stranger for two years Viren#Dad of the year fellas.#Viren clearly sees himself as a self-sacrificing saviour#so it's deeply sad and ironic that he can't truly protect anyone- not Harrow- not Claudia#and despite saving Soren's life is very resentful about how that ruined his marriage and blames his son for that#it's pretty realistic- people who position themselves as heroic protectors get blinded by their own self-righteousness easily#sarasade text#tdp meta#tdp viren#tdp claudia#cw: religion#cw: religious themes#to be sure
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As a coda to my post from last night, this goes both ways for Zuko and Katara. We see Katara tell different boys about what happened to her mom - Haru is sympathetic and he gets it, but his dad is alive and he is, frankly, a pretty undeveloped background character, Jet is sympathetic too-- "Katara I'm so sorry"-- but then uses that to manipulate her into hurting innocent people, Aang is very dismissive (I'm sorry! he is! it's not his fault he had bad writers) and Zuko-- is the one to say exactly what she needed to hear.
In the Southern Air Temple:
Katara [Close-up of Katara.] Well, I just want you to be prepared for what you might see. The Fire Nation is ruthless. [Sadly.] They killed my mother, and they could have done the same to your people.
Aang [Ponders over her words for a bit. Hopefully.] Just because no one has seen an airbender, doesn't mean the Fire Nation killed them all. They probably escaped!
This is the first time Katara has mentioned her mother to Aang, and he just completely skips over that comment. Obviously Katara's intent is to try to warn him, and Aang is optimistic because that is a pretty big horror, to think of your entire nation wiped out -- but he doesn't even offer a word of acknowledgment to her before skipping to his optimism.
The other time this is brought up with Aang specifically is the Southern Raiders. I'm linking to @catie-does-things 's excellent analysis here of how Aang's moralizing is both dismissive and immature.
Meanwhile, the first time Katara tells Zuko about her mother, they are still enemies, and he offers an olive branch -- "I'm sorry, that's something we have in common" -- and they're able to tentatively build up a trust around each other. That's of course betrayed, and leads to him trying to make amends in the Southern Raiders episode. This is when she tells him about how her mother dies (something, notably, she never tells anyone else in detail in the series), and he, very intuitively, says the exact thing she needs to hear:
Katara: But we were too late. When we got there, the man was gone. [Voice begins breaking.] And so was she.
Zuko Your mother was a brave woman.
Katara [Clutches her necklace.] I know.
Katara doesn't get this level of consolation from literally anyone else in the entire series. Her grief and anger isn't taken seriously by anyone else, not in this way.
So it's not only Katara doing the work in her relationship with Zuko-- Zuko is also very supportive of her, in a way that she needs and her canonical love interests are not
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Are you guys ready to hear about a ATLA fic that has Incels written all over it? I promise you it will blow your mind.
So the fic was Zuko and Sokka centric(don't know if it was Zukka, but probably not since it's an old fic) and Sokka is helping Zuko deal with the "trauma" of what Azula did to him. Because you know. She abused him. Burned his eye and everything. It's not like Ozai did any of that. Nope. Ozai isn't blamed for anything.
In the process of helping Zuko, Sokka realizes that he's ALSO been abused by Katara and that it's her fault he can't remember Kya and only sees Katara's face.
So Sokka confronts her. Katara starts crying, and of course it gets framed as her "playing the victim" about how Kya died. So Sokka says "She was my mom first, Katara." and "You can't hurt me anymore."
The best part? It's framed as this big triumphant moment for him.
I'm terribly sorry for sharing this abomination with you all but I felt like you had to know just how much this made me laugh as well as seethe because what in the actual fuck is that😭.
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If y'all don't stop tagging me in "list your favorite ________" challenges, I swear.....(kidding)
You know I'm indecisive and that the second I'm asked questions like this everything I have ever known or loved just falls right out of my head :'(
ANYWAY. I was tagged by @colourme-feral to name 9 favorite TV series. Nine? Not ten? Alright, whatever. Now presenting, in no particular order
wen-kexing-apologist's Top Nine Favorite TV Series
I think, much like last time where I listed my ten favorite characters AND THEN LEFT OUT PIKE MOTHERFUCKING DEXTER LIKE A GODDAMN NOOB I can't be certain I am forgetting one that I cherish greatly.
Avatar: The Last Airbender
I'm putting this first because A:TLA was a show I watched live in my youth and I remember running the hating Zuko to loving Zuko gauntlet in real time.
But seriously, you can't give me the single greatest redemption arc written in human history and not expect me to cradle this show close to my chest for the rest of my life.
There are so many shows we grow up with that we remember fondly and that in the grand scheme of things aren't that good, protected by young minds and nostalgia AND THIS ISN'T ONE OF THEM.
Seriously my poor mother has had to listen to hours worth of rambling about the incredibly strong adult themes, three dimensional characters, and conversations around war and the portrayal of no one society as inherently evil from both of her children.
This is my boy and I will love him until the end of time, I'm sorry that I hated you when we first met. In my defense the narrative compelled me to do so.
Sense8
Queer, sex positive, beautifully crafted, orgies as a symbol of human connection, the way the world is so small and that people from all over the world have skills that are valuable, that save lives, that are needed and necessary. Humanity and complexity given to people involved in the drug trade, humanity and complexity given to drug users, humanity and complexity given to gang members, humanity and complexity given to prisoners. Love, loss, tragedy, trauma, trans joy, throuple, couple and whatever the fuck Daniella is doing, one really good weed brownie curing transphobia.
The ending wasn't perfect but that isn't the Wachowski Sister's fault, it was Netflix's fault.
I Told Sunset About You/I Promised You The Moon
This show, especially I Told Sunset About You, may be the single most emotional a show has ever made me. I think I cried four times per episode for ITSAY, the only time I didn't cry four times was Episode 3, where foolishly I made it through 98% of the episode went "this edible ain't shit I don't know why everyone is so emo about Ep 3, it's been the most mild so far" AND THEN FUCKING BAM
Teh with the steel fucking chair!
When I tell you I spent hours, numb, staring up at the ceiling?? It's not an exaggeration.
When I tell you I thought about this scene for more than three and immediately burst into tears??? It's not an exaggeration.
This show altered my brain chemistry, this show altered my DNA, this show was so fucking good and ruined me so thoroughly that I wasn't even able to make my brain come up with things to analyze.
in this show, WHERE THERE IS SO MUCH THERE TO ANALYZE. I am making a friend watch it right now so I'm hoping I will have more to contemplate and talk about as I rewatch it now that the emotional impact has softened.
Moonlight Chicken
Look no further than my Gay Meta Masterpost pinned to my page to understand why I love this show so much. It is gorgeous, it handles the subject of disability well, it's the show that got me to start posting meta and as a result it is the show that got me all the friends I have on tumblr now.
This show is perfect, the acting is spectacular, the inherent queerness that runs through the narrative, THE LIGHTING. Aof knocked it out of the motherfucking park with this one.
The Eclipse
Folks let me tell you what happens when you go from Not Me to The Eclipse...
you fall desperately in love with First Kanaphan Puitrakul and his masterful acting ability. I love this show so much. P'Golf had things to say and she was not afraid to say it. The queer characters got to be complex and messy and wrong sometimes, none of the main characters were morally superior, they all contributed to maintaining the system, they all helped harm other queer people. This show was made with pocket change and a dream and it gave me two of my favorite kisses in BL, one of my favorite stories in BL, and my sweet summer child
my beloved Baby War Criminal who is my favorite character ever in BL. Look at him. He is under so much pressure. GOD I LOVE THIS SHOW. And I love Thua too.
Our Flag Means Death
Setting aside the problematic fans, I watched this show eleven times. It was one of the only shows I'd seen where every couple was queer, I love how gradually the writing team was able to move this show from comedy to something more serious, I love the way Stede returned home only to find that he had been forever changed, I love the way Blackbeard was on his way to grieving and healing with healthy coping mechanisms, and the commentary the show gave on how exposure to toxic masculinity and internalized/externalized homophobia (in the form of Izzy) can alter that course. I love that traditional roles and expectations are subverted in this show. That Pete and Lucius are in love, that Olu gets thrown around by Jim, that the show allows for an older queer person to both realize his sexuality and experience his first queer love.
And also
it introduced me to one of the first nonbinary characters I had seen on screen. Jim Jimenez you can murder me whenever you wish, it would be my absolute honor.
What We Do in The Shadows
For one, it's hilarious
For two, Jackie Daytona exists.
For three
It gave me Guillermo de la Cruz, the sexiest motherfucker alive.
The Owl House
Queer, neurodivergent representation????? In my TV show??????? A main plot point being around the all consuming nature of white supremacy and religious zeal. Hunter? Dear sweet, awkward, traumatized Hunter? RAINE MOTHERFUCKING WHISPERS?!
Listen, I'm a simple bitch, okay? You put an enby in my television and I will be forced to stan.
I mean look at them!
Word of Honor
*points to username*
If I didn't put WoH on here I would have to give up rights to my username.
This is the show that started me on the BL spiral and having read the novel, I have to say that I have never seen a show change a character and expand upon a story as well as Word of Honor has.
The sex appeal, the swagger, and the lowkey unsettling obsession The Scorpion King has in the TV show compared to the book?
Expert execution of fundamentally and fully changing source text. The costumes are gorgeous and the way I was driven to the brink of insanity by how gay this show was despite censorship is truly unmatched. I know censorship can dampen a queer story experience, but damned if i didn't go feral and say "I can't believe they got away with that" at every given opportunity.
And
It gave me my beloved Adult War Criminal, Wen Kexing, who as we all know, has never done anything wrong in his life, ever.
___
Bonus Round:
aka shows that I haven't or that haven't finished yet so I am contractually obligated not to put them on a list.
180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us
I have two episodes left, it is absolutely killer, and if it continues to be as strong as it is this will be a 10/10 show for me and join the ranks of my favorites. This show is driving me mad with both hands and barriers and I need everyone to know that.
La Pluie
There are three episodes left for this to go wrong which is the only reason why I haven't put it on the list. But similarly to 180 Degrees, if it continues the way it is going now this will be a 10/10 show for me and join the ranks of my favorites. I LOVE what they are doing to subvert the soulmate trope. It is a masterpiece so far and I need more people to be watching this.
Tagging:
@solitaryandwandering, @ranchthoughts, @wanderlust-in-my-soul, @so-much-yet-to-learn, and @neuroticbookworm
Your choice whether to participate or not and apologies if you have already been tagged.
#atla#sense8#itsay#ipytm#moonlight chicken#the eclipse#our flag means death#the owl house#what we do in the shadows#word of honor#avatar the last airbender#mlc#toh#woh#ofmd#wwdits#la pluie#180 degree longitude passes through us#tag game
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Watched the new atla show. And now I will share my thoughts because I need to put them somewhere.
I agree with people that it kind of fell flat. More like an impersonation than the actual show. Also, people are right, where is Katara's rage? I'm not going to dive into it, because people already have, but Katara is stubborn and righteous, so where'd they put those qualities?
I wish the show would stop telling us everything. Like, stop telling me that Ozai thought finding the Avatar would be impossible, and sent Zuko on this quest anyway. I know, it's obvious. I don't need to be told the subtext, that's why it's subtext. Subtality could do this show a world of good.
Zhao's death sucked. It was perfect how it was in the original, it showed Zuko's kindness, and Zhao's hubris being his downfall was perfect. Also, this isn't necessarily a complaint, just something I noticed, Zhao feels different in the show. A guy with similar aspirations and ideas, yes, but not the same guy we all hate.
The acting wasn't always the greatest, but I can't tell if it's actually the actor's fault or script (probably script).
I wish Sokka was involved in the Jet plotline, he played a big part in it originally, and it really showed his true character.
Why did Katara and Aang never get any actual training in Northern Water Tribe? That's what they were there to do. Somehow, magically Katara became a master waterbender, because she what? Believed in herself? That's not how learning a skill works. Imagine trying to learn the flute, you're confident, and you figured out on your own how to play a few notes. But you still need someone to teach you the rest of the notes, how to trill, how to read the sheet music, etc. You can't learn everything just from confidence.
The costumes bothered me so much. Sokka and Katara's coats looked so light weight, which is probably more comfortable for the actors, but those coats could not shield you from a light breeze, much less a frozen tundra. Also someone pointed out that their clothes don't actually look worn, and they're right.
What on earth was the scarf scene? Why was it there? What was the point? I am not a Zutara shipper (though I have no hate for the shippers, just dislike for the ship), and now online is just going to be posts about that.
Was Suki just not wearing her warrior make-up because she had to kiss Sokka? Either way, it's still upsetting. The one time she doesn't wear her warrior make-up (which is an honor to wear) is when she's finally in a real fight, and on the day Kyoshi shows up too. Also, no Sokka wearing warrior make-up? I get if they couldn't fit it in, but it's still a bit sad.
I don't understand them getting rid of the fact that Aang ran away, I think it really makes his character more complex as he struggles to take on the responsibilities of the Avatar.
They sorta switched Sokka and Katara's roles in the Omashu tunnels, which I don't get.
Having Zuko fight Ozai in the Agni Kai was a terrible idea.
I'm sorry to say this, because I don't like Zuko being in pain. But Zuko's scar is smaller and a lot more understated than in the animation. I don't know much about burnt tissue, or how it will scar, especially with their technology. But we rarely see heroes with facial scars beyond a line through the eye or something, I don't want it taken away. The scar doesn't even seem to reach his ear. And I'm sad about them confirming his sight was fine. Zuko with some hearing and vision loss is technically just a headcanon. But then why did Zuko only leave his unscarred side up when sleeping around people he didn't trust in the animated version?
I could tell that Aang was airbending during it, so it wasn't really flying. But it's a little too similar, especially considering how significant flying is in Korra.
The thing that bothered me the most was Yue's death. Why was it barely acknowledged?! Yue made a huge sacrifice, but instead we're making up a plotline that causes Aang to have the spotlight instead. And when Sokka was talking to Arnook about Yue, somehow the conversation became focused on Sokka, and his insecurity, instead of someone they both deeply miss (though Sokka and Yue's relationship development could've been better). Sokka is joking around again by the end of the episode, it feels like her death never happened! And why make her a fish! No offense to fishes, but it feels less impactful, and in the original, we could see how Yue was able to keep some of herself alive in the way she presents herself as a spirit, she doesn't do that here.
Some things I liked:
Zuko being upset about Aang stealing his journal.
Sokka and Suki had really good chemistry (though, the show doesn't really give us a reason why Suki likes him, she seems annoyed with him when they first meet).
The effects were good, and I liked a lot of the fight scenes.
Kyoshi.
Oma and Shu being lesbians.
That one lady hitting Zuko for trying to hurt Aang.
Suki being awkward and beating up the guy she likes.
I am impressed with how they were able to overlap some story lines. That must have been difficult to figure out.
The sets.
Azula.
#did hei bai ever get better in the live action#I don't remember it happening#I'll probably add more stuff to the list if I think of things#atla#avatar: the last airbender#atla live action#atla netflix#the show feels like it's made out of cardboard#if that makes sense
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Aang: I'm so sorry about your guitar, and your lamp, and your table-
Zuko: That's alright, it's not your fault.
Aang: But...
Katara: Aang, Zuko, isn't mad about all that because he knows the earthquake caused all that damage.
Toph: Yeah, we can only blame the earth!
Sokka: And all it's quaking!
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An introduction
(Because I just noticed I haven't done one)
My name(s): Dinnerbug!
Both just bug or dinner work too if you want to shorten it down, and I'm also very open to Nicknames :D
My pronouns: It's (very) complicated
Sometimes She/Him feels right, sometimes He/They, sometimes They/It. But I really am not sure, so any combination of those works for me!
Things I think people should know about me:
I don't care who, what or where you are, I don't care what you believe. As long as what you like, believe, identify as or do doesn't harm anyone (harm anyone innocent that is) then you do you. I'm sick of people bullying eachother over nothing and I've worked on myself to break that mindset of 'I don't like that so it's bad'. To put it short, I'm a very accepting person and I'm only judgemental towards assholes (edited to add this because I feel it's important and I forgot it when I first made this post)
I am very anxious and I have very little self-confidence. If you interact with me in any way, be it a message, comment or ask and I don't reply, I'm probably just drowning in anxiety trying to figure out what to reply with. So if something like that happens I'm so sorry if I respond late, it just takes me time and it is not your fault. Also sometimes I start writing weirdly formally and I have no idea how I developed that habit
Miscellaneous facts: This is gonna be long
I am autistic
I am british
I am asexual
I am non-binary
I have aphantasia (it sucks)
I love LORE
My favourite kind of fanfics are the kind where all my relatable favourite characters go through severe emotional turmoil and/or get hit into a wall with great force.
I can ride a bike
My favourite games are Minecraft and Portal 2
I love puzzles
I have an amazingly terrible sleep schedule. I will often be awake until 4am and asleep until 3pm.
I hope to learn to draw so I can interact with my favourite fandoms better and perhaps even make some friends
My hair is dyed
My favourite colour is black (boring I know)
My favourite word is No
My favourite foods are pizza, pasta, cheese and coconut
I'm very detail oriented
I don't tend to ship characters much
I tend to ramble a lot in posts like this I am so so sorry lmao
I'm so terrible at introductions I had to look at how other people format theirs for reference, and this probably still isn't very good :')
Fandoms I'm in and actively interact with: If any fandoms I list here are stereotyped negatively I promise I'm a nice, chill person and I just want to enjoy things peacefully (list may change over time)
Hermitcraft
(my favourite hermits: Grian and Mumbo)
Rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles
(my favourite characters: Leo and Donnie)
Avatar: the last airbender
(my favourite characters: Zuko and Iroh)
Hazbin hotel
(my favourite characters: Alastor and Vox)
Sonic the hedgehog
(my favourite characters: Shadow and Rouge)
The amazing digital circus
(my favourite characters: Jax and Ragatha)
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What are your top ten favorite scenes in Avatar the Last Airbender?
Thank you so much for the ask!!! Oh my god. This so hard, I've never thought of individual scenes as top favorites but I've tried my best and narrowed it down I think?
Katara v Pakku 'You can't knock me down!': So I watched Avatar when it was first airing as a kid, there weren't many dark-skinned main characters around, especially not girls who fight and certainly not against sexist men who try to stop people from learning. So when I saw this scene, I was at the edge of my seat, it taught me a lot about bravery and I still cheer and clap for Katara when I re-watch the fight.
Sokka throughout The Fortuneteller: I'm an atheist and people didn't exactly take kindly to that when I was a kid & I was infamous as the 'weird kid who probably has no morals'. So seeing Sokka outwardly express skepticism about the spirits & 'higher powers' was very comforting.
Sokka inventing the air balloon solution: I think it was one of the first scenes where I really started liking Sokka. The thing about hot air actually made me read my school textbooks & google stuff to figure out how air currents work, so that helped me with a few science classes about molecules.
Aang in The Storm: It was one of our first glimpses into how he felt about running away, the guilt, the sadness, the pain of being the last of your people with no one to turn to and thinking its all your fault.
Toph fighting the Earth Rumble goons when Aang & her dad are watching: The way she moves is so freaking cool!!! It was her showing exactly how capable she is, she isn't kidding when she says she's the world's best earthbender because yeah, who the heck else could do what she does???
Hama's flashback: Once again I watched this show as a kid, so this was the first time i got confronted with the fact that there will never be a 'perfectly good' or 'perfectly bad' side. People are complicated & I understand what pushed Hama to do what she did but that doesn't excuse it so in that vein;
Katara sucking the water out of the field to fight Hama: It's just badass even if it is angsty.
Aang pulling Ozai down by his beard and encasing him in rock: I mean-- like that is just objectively cool and very embarrassing for the 40-something year old guy. Aang was in top form.
Zuko in the bunker with Ozai: I don't watch too many new cartoons but I don't think any show has ever so explicitly called out the abuser and made sure the abuser is acknowledged as unforgivable. It really put into light for me a lot of things about child-parent relationships, what its supposed to be (forever angry at Boku No Hero Academia for using their Zuko-based character to forgive and redeem his abuser, lf you don't know anything about BNHA this means nothing to you jbcfjhbh sorry).
Yuekka last kiss: They're the ship that first introduced me to tragic romances,. My heart was broken and I kept waiting the entire 3 seasons down to the last episode for Yue to make a return and say "hey guys! so I'm a spirit I'm alive!". I still like it because idk I love angst a lot and the whole story of a princess finding glimpses of freedom in a boy who's traveled the world and yearning for it gets to me.
I'm not remembering other scenes that may have had more impact on me just yet, but a few honorable mentions; Ran and Shao's dance(I LOVE DRAGONS 100/10 they make everything better always), Zuko in the Cooler, Sokka and the cactus juice, Aang's anxiety episode.
Thank you again for asking! This was so fun to do~~
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why are you writing targaryen level stuff for the fire nation royalty within your headcanons? even if its subtle, isnt that a magnet for controversy?
I appreciate your concern, but if anyone tries to twist my words for the sake of starting drama, I block them and let them be someone else's problem. I'm pretty open about this, as well as my policy of willingly tagging for any specific content that isn't thematically significant in the show. Topics like rape and incest i've tagged from the beginning without any input because I know how sensitive people can be toward them and wanted them to be easily avoidable. I typically keep posts with those and other, less family friendly topics, off the main tag. If that one jinko blogger i had to block for her immature behavior found my post headcanon'ing her favorite character as a sex worker in a neutral tone, it wasn't my fault she found it. I deliberately kept it off the main tag and tagged the post with a content warning. She wanted to be a brat about it, so she got blocked. So did the blogger who yelled at me for wanting Ursa to be a "perfect victim" because i liked the character written in a way they didn't like. So did the one who claimed i hated autistic people because i called Zuko unpleasant by Inupiaq standards. With any luck i blocked all the little cretins who would want to throw a bitch fit over my posts.
Also, i'm not actually writing Targaryen level stuff for Fire Nation Royalty, and if you came here expecting that, i'm sorry to disappoint. I've written the Fire Nation royal family having a few first cousin marriages, spousal and child abuse that status as royalty allows, and an occasional addiction; nothing about siblings going at it, cheating on each other with other siblings, executing prisoners by mass immolation, cheating on siblings with cousins, brutally raping sibling spouses, being consumed by religious fanaticism [yet, perhaps in the future], slitting their wrists on the throne (allegedly), and especially not girlbossifying colonialism at the hands of teenagers. Someone's probably writing it if that's what you're into, but that someone isn't me.
I don't even write regular smut because i find detailed sex scenes kinda boring. The most you're gonna get here is like, light petting and vague descriptions of sensation and emotional reaction between non-related persons. Sometimes one partner is pushy, sometimes money is involved. Spring Awakening level stuff. I think the spiciest thing i posted was Mai leading Zuko (both written as adults) on a leash and stopping the scene when he got triggered and was too out of it to say his safeword and then helping him through the trauma response. I think he was mentioned to not be wearing a shirt and she covered him up so servants bringing tea wouldn't see him topless because he's a prude like that. Nothing really Targaryen level.
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my only issue with azula is that i wish she went apeshit earlier. grey delisle absolutely MURDERED that episode. i like crazy hos but they have to give me more meat. i just know it's because the depths of imperialism were so washed here (which is fine) bc it would be so much more to bite into. i keep asking why and how the hell this whole world started and happened beyond "just because" and "bc i have physical power"
it's just not how it works. it's perfect timing for this show to come up so we can talk about what this shit means and the way media fucks it up. zuko's character is for once someone whose complexity within where he grew up is rewarding and where his blame and complictly is very very different than anyone else. didn't expect to like him so easily.
iroh's price to pay for what he did was the loss of his son. zuko's price started with the burn and learning. the rest of them face immense pain (their fault). i feel nothing for the colonizer and imperialist unless i understand more and i have no interest in thinking about what age is the proper age to get your fucking brains. what i'm interested in is NOW. so what are we gonna do?
if only our understanding of culture wasn't so neutralized and reduced to easy answers and ideas of being able to preserve nation...i hear toph becomes a cop....i cry.
i will never ever EVER ever accept these people as is. they are not civilians for the most part. sorry. also when ppl say kyoshi is ruthless but don't talk about her heart. she isn't ruthless. i support aang's decision because of his beliefs, age, and abilities and the show hammered this home (and the show's love of animals...seriously it rly renewed my love of vegetarianism) but kyoshi isn't ruthless. we burn ourselves for freedom, we make hard decisions. she is doing so. it is hard to kill and i always always always think people, even freedom fighters, should toil with this. and they will and they do. if i were aang, i would have made that decision but it is a hard one.
LONG LIVE THE INTIFADA! we kill colonizers is a badge of honor that comes with a price. the gun is our pen and our pen is the gun!
for a kid's show it's phenomenal writing on a personal level but i can see that it has bred almost 20y of a completely skewed vision of what the fuck was actually going on wrt imperialism which i am beginning to truly believe is the main contradiction.
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I have to preface this by saying that i have nothing against suki lol
I recently found sukitara (how have i been sleeping in on this) and i love it!
I do have a dilemma tho. I try to write sukitara, but I have nothing to build up on when it comes to Suki. And I've tried looking for meta on tumblr and other places, but all I got was how Suki is a girlboss (which I agree with wholeheartedly). I must say, when I want to write a fic with her as the main character it is hard for me to shape her character arc. How do I know about her flaws and her inner struggles? Yes, she is a warrior, usually associated with masculinity, but she doesn't shy away from her femininity, but I feel like those are ideal traits rather than something pertaining to an individual (I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense, that's the best way I could come up with to explain myself 😅). Like, say if I look at katara herself, I can figure her out and I have solid perception of her, for example, her deep sense of justice fuels her kindness and her rage. There is more to her character than initially portrayed by the creators.
So yeah, I feel like suki is not as developed as the other characters. Is it the fault of my perspective? Or is it actually like that? I genuinely want to know this i don't want to write suki badly :(
Oh lmao. Hi. I never saw this. Well glad I am seeing this now. Sorry for the long wait. Think I made you wait over a year lol. Anyway.
So. Here's the problem: Suki isn't a main character. They don't get treated like one either and there is nothing wrong with it. But see what I did there. I used they instead of she. Because its my personal head canon. Suki is nonbinary in my head cs same.
That's the goot thing. The fact that you have a character - their basic traids like helping others, overly loyal and protective, selfless, stubborn, inteligent, enpowering. And you can add onto that.
Why are they selfless? Where did it come from? Is it a problem? How does it help them how does it fire back? Like trowing themselves in dangerous situations if someone they love is threatened. They didn't hesitate to let Appa escape and stay back wjth their warriors (aka selfless, helpful and loyal). You can give them flaws and think of your own reasons for why they r like how they are.
Let's say... They have PTSD from the war - like everyone. But they were also in prison - so give them PTSD from the prison. How do they respond when triggered? Do they curl up on themselves and cry or fo they get defence? Do they play a tuff snack only to end up sobbing in their room at night too scared to show who they really are because pressure ways them down and they don't want to disappoint everyone. Why don't they want to disappoint everyone? You get me? It goes on. Take whatever you want - you can basically take yourself and give them your characteristics.
I see so many people write Zuko or Katara ooc (out of character) while Suki is right there.
Like no. Zuko won't curl up and cry if he gets triggered - he will probably be angry or get defensive.
Ki on the other hand we don't know. So we can do whatever we want. It's just up to you what you want to do with it. That's so cool about having a side character with basically no personality but girlboss.
Hope I could somehow help. That's what I always do :D
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@gaymedievaldruid mentioned wanting more dark!Lu Ten content. I was actually thinking about this at work the other day! So here's a scene.
Cold
Lu Ten was startled awake by creaking hinges. For a moment, he thought he was back in that dark horrible cell, with the weight of an entire lake pressing down on his head. Then he felt the softness of his blanket and the warmth of his father's apartment, and he remembered. He unclenched his muscles.
Lu Ten sat up. "What time is it?" He rubbed the crust from his eyes.
"Very late, or very early. Go back to sleep, My Son. You deserve to rest." Father sounded exhausted.
Lu Ten yawned. "Why were you out so late?" Lu Ten thought about making a joke concerning lady friends, but he decided against it. Even joking about his father touching a disgusting Earth Kingdom woman was too much.
"I was looking for Zuko."
Lu Ten scowled. It had been three days since Zuko ran away. Why was Father even still thinking about him? "That selfish brat doesn't deserve your time," he declared.
Father stopped in the middle of hanging up his cloak. He took a deep breath. "That is an unkind thing to say about your cousin," he said in a tired tone.
"Well, it's true. After everything you've done for him, he just bailed. He's lazy and doesn't want to work to support our family. We're better off without him."
"Zuko is no stranger to hard work." Father bit his lower lip and then sat down on the ground. He looked so weary. "Lately he has been going down to prepare the teashop for opening before the sun even rises, and he would stay downstairs working until long after the sun set. I tried to get him to take a break. If he was tired, he only needed to say..."
Lu Ten frowned as he watched his father wipe tears from his eyes with the back of his hand. Lu Ten knew the real reason Zuko was in the tea shop, and it wasn't because he loved hard work. He was avoiding Lu Ten, avoiding his punishments. He was probably just standing around and getting in the way.
"I don't understand why he didn't just talk to me. If he was unhappy, why didn't he tell me? Did I do something?" Father shook his head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be burdening you with my worries. You need sleep."
"So do you," Lu Ten protested. "You need rest too. You'll make yourself sick going out like this every night. He isn't worth your health."
Father frowned. "He could get hurt or sick while on his own."
"And whose fault would that be," Lu Ten insisted. "His. If he gets hurt, it will be because of his own stupidity and selfishness. It shouldn't be your problem."
Father's frown deepened. "You don't mean that."
Lu Ten scowled. "Yes, I do. Why wouldn't I?"
"He's your cousin," Father whispered.
Lu Ten felt rage boil in his blood. "He's OZAI'S son. Ozai tried to have me killed. By rights, you should kill Zuko like Ozai tried to kill me."
All the color drained from Father's face. For a moment, Lu Ten worried that he really was sick, that even after departing Zuko was causing more problems for them, stealing Father's health. "Zuko isn't responsible for what Ozai did. He had no idea of it."
Lu Ten scoffed. "A branch produces the same fruit its seed came from," he insisted, quoting Grandfather. "Ozai is a concubine's get, and that tainted him. He passed that same taint on to his children."
Father stared at him for a long moment. "Did you... Did you say something like that to Zuko? Did you... tell him you think he's tainted?"
Lu Ten frowned. "Why wouldn't I? He is."
Father looked a little green, like he'd consumed bad meat. He got to his feet. "I... need some air. I need... I have to..." He turned around and started to open the door, not even bothering with his cloak.
Lu Ten scrambled to his feet in alarm. "Dad? Are you okay?"
Father shook his head. "I don't think I am," he whispered. Then he slipped out the door and was gone.
Lu Ten was alone again, and the apartment felt so much colder, almost as cold as his cell. Lu Ten wrapped his arms around his chest and shivered.
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Hello, it's me again and my extremely annoying ass talking about the same thing I've mentioned in this post, but differently.
So what is bordering me again? Someone's thoughts that in my opinion are missing some facts.
After all these days I still feel like people are great at misunderstanding this episode and half of the character's actions. This episode is about katara being at one of her lowest points, but then gaining strength and overcoming her own crazy and unsteady feelings, all this while trying to figure out what SHE should and wants to do, still basing on the opinions of people that are closest to her. It's kinda sad that this is being brought up mostly in shipping contexts...
Now, what I see is quite not right with this post? This whole Zuko characterization! Zuko was the one who brought her to this point from the beginning of the episode! And yes I agree, that he was helpful in this journey that she needed to take, but can we remind ourselves why is that happening? Katara told him, why she doesn't trust him - she gave him exact reasons, literally screaming them into his face. The only one he actually understood was the one about her mother. That is still good considering that he only started "being nice", but please don't forget that it isn't like a whole new level of being an amazing friend that no one ever discovered - I say this only because I've seen some people being head over heels for his move. He led her there so he could gain her trust - don't lie to me that it wasn't the main reason. He wasn't thinking much about others in the past - especially not her feelings (for example in Earth Kingdom crystal catacombs), mostly, cause they were enemies, but we know that he hasn't learned much empathy in his early life (which of course isn't his fault). He only gets to the point of doing something selflessly - maybe this is one of his own important moments when he realizes what he can do for others. But no matter what, it still was his first goal - her trust, not peace of her mind. That's why when he saw her approve his idea, he wanted to push her down this slide, right into where he is needed - that means their little trip; and why he disregarded Aang and Sokka's meaningful ideas.
This is why he "lets her be angry". That was his point. Throughout his whole life, he has found that the best way to express his feelings is through anger and he thinks it will help her. As the ending of the episode shows - it was only partly true, because Katara's not any of her friends and she (not someone else) had to choose what is right for her own good.
So here is an actual appreciation of Zuko's one behavior - silence, so she could take her time. She had to make up her mind and this silence looked pretty comfortable, without judging. Good job Zuko!
Now, you could think that I agree with the author of this post and you all can leave...but then, comes "he let her want to kill a man". HE LET HER WANT TO KILL A MAN. I'm sorry, but just reading this makes me shiver. LETTING YOUR FRIENDS KILL IN A REVENGE IS NOT GOOD, OKAY?! DO WE GET IT STRAIGHT? Killing someone is not something somebody with a clear mind should do! Especially when somebody is 14!! And have been living through war their entire life!! JUST NOO! And definitely not when this particular person is katara, someone who showed Zuko mercy after almost a year of him trying to haunt her and her closest friends. This is my issue. It's not Zuko's quality that he thinks that katara wanting to kill a man is right. It should ring in his head as a sign that something really bad is happening with her. We all know that katara is one of the most loving and caring people and he should know it by this time. But his goal of gaining her trust, just like in the past with his goal to capture the avatar, blinded him to all of his bad actions and ways of thinking along with the red flags in his own state of mind.
He was the one who showed her this path. He gave her a thought about revenge on this man. This has never even occurred to her to take such a trip. And even though in the end everything is good, nice and it turns out this event built her character up and strengthen her bond with Zuko, we should remember it wasn't her own idea. She didn't want to kill a man. She was put in a situation where she thought she had no choice. And that was because of Zuko. And yes I know that at this point I should mention that he wanted to do something nice, but people forget about the bad sides of this whole thing, that I keep on focusing on them here.
"And when she chose not to" also sounds so bad to me, like he would go along with her and burn someone down just because. It seems nice to think that your friends are always a backup to your decisions. But real and good friends won't allow you to become a monster and will say out loud what issues they have with what you're going to do. I don't know how it would end if she really chose to do it, maybe he would redeem himself even more and stop her or something. We haven't seen that happening. What I know is, sometimes when we think we are supporting someone, we are just standing there watching them do something stupid or even dangerous. And that's why Zuko, as much as he wants to be helpful to his hopefully-soon friend, he might have hurt her even more than she already was. (This is also closing the discussion some people are trying to have saying sHe ShOuLd HaVe KiLlEd HiM).
Later on, I don't see him actually helping that much?? Yes, okay he threatened some people on their way, but was he really dangerous in comparison to katara? I don't know. He wasn't talking - and I need to say it once again - it feels like it was what she wanted, but maybe if he tried to talk to her about this issue instead of going on a killing trip it would have been better for her? It's just an assumption, so don't take it as a matter of fact or something, but still nice to have it in the back of your mind.
He doesn't seem to be there for her. He isn't comforting her in any way, but I think she would have pushed him away anyway.
And the end with "he felt her anger with her when she needed it" which sounds ridiculous to me. She needed someone to feel her anger?? Did she really? Or maybe something calm would have been better? He is angry, but also still full of pity for the man who is so similar to old Zuko from only months ago. He wanted her to choose revenge because that's what he knows, but if we compare their situations, if it had been not that long ago, it could have been Zuko in Yon Rha's place. It's easy to hate someone who we barely know, but when we know their backstory and upbringing, we can feel sorrow very easily. Or at least that's what happened to Katara while she talked with Zuko in the catacombs. We have seen his story, we're quick to understand (but not justify) his past actions. It's weird for me that Zuko himself never compared himself to the man he sent Katara after. Or maybe he did and that's why he was trying so hard to make her believe that he has changed.
So yes, this is me analyzing almost every sentence in a very short post. I hope my thoughts about this topic made you see this from a different perspective at least a little bit and that I showed you what things I tend to disagree with some people on the internet. Anyway no hard feelings toward anyone and I hope it wasn't too aggressive of me. Have a nice day!
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Because of the "accidental" Maiko Tangled au.... here's some tangled scenes but it's maiko
Honestly no idea of the role call, as in who would be Gothel etc. I actually don't want to spend much time with this so uh if there are any creative souls feel free to create a role call ig :D
Some scenes might also be altered to fit them but uh... I've got no time for this :( also both could fit either role so you can also just turn everything around here. Although I don't know what alter ego Mai would have lol
Mai: (holding knife at him) Who else knows my location, Lee?
Lee: All right, knives.
Mai: Mai.
Lee: Gesundheit. Here's the deal. I was in a situation, gallivanting through the forest, I came across your tower and... Oh! Oh no. Where is my satchel?
Mai: I've hidden it. Somewhere you'll never find it.
Lee: (looks around) It's in that pot isn't it?
________
Mai: Something brought you here, Lee. Call it what you will. Fate, destiny...
Lee: A rhino.
Mai: So I've made the decision to trust you.
Lee: A horrible decision, really.
Mai: But trust me when I tell you this. You can tear this tower apart brick by brick, but without my help, you will never find your precious satchel.
Lee: Let me just get this straight. I take you to see the lanterns, bring you back home, and you'll give me back my satchel?
Mai: I promise.
Lee: (looks at her skeptically)
Mai: And when I promise something, I never, ever break that promise. Ever.
_________
Lee: Let's just turn around and get you home. Here's your knifes, here's your frog. I get back my satchel, you get back a mother-daughter relationship based on mutual trust and voilà! We part ways as unlikely friends.
Mai: No! I am seeing those lanterns.
Lee: Oh, come on! What is it going to take for me to get my satchel back?
Mai: (holds knife his direction) I will use this.
___________
[After The Snuggly Turleduckling]
Mai: So... Lee? Where are you from?
Lee: Whoa! Sorry, knives, I don't do back-story.
However, I am becoming very interested in yours. Now, I know I'm not supposed to mention the hair.
Mai: Nope.
Lee: Or the mother.
Mai: Uh-uh.
Lee: Frankly, I'm too scared to ask about the frog.
Mai: Dragon.
___________
Mai: Who's that?
Lee: They don't like me.
Mai: Who's that?
Lee: They don't like me either.
Mai: Who's that?
Lee: Let's just assume for the moment that everyone in here doesn't like me.
___________
[In the cave that is filling with water]
Mai: This is all my fault. She was right. I never should have done this. I'm so... I'm so sorry, Lee.
Lee: ... (sighs) Zuko
Mai: What?
Zuko: My real name is Zuko. Someone might as well know.
Mai: (chuckles softly) I have magic hair that glows when I sing.
Zuko: What?
Mai: I have... magic hair that glows when I sing!
__________
Mai: We made it.
Zuko: Her hair glows.
Mai: We're alive. I'm alive!
Zuko: I didn't see that coming.
Mai: Zuko?
Zuko: [talking to (a tiny) Druk] The hair actually glows.
Mai: Zuko.
Zuko: Why does her hair glow?
Mai: Zuko!
Zuko: What?!
Mai: It doesn't just glow.
Druk: *smirks at him*
Zuko: Why is he smiling at me?
________
Mai: No, no, no. Zuko. No! Look at me. I'm right here. Don't go. stay with me, Zuko. (holds hand to her cut (light?) hair Flower gleam and glow let your power shine make the clock reverse bring back what once was mine-
Zuko: Mai...
Mai: What?
Zuko: (weakly) You were my new dream.
Mai: and you were mine.
_________
Zuko: (exhales) Mai?
Mai: Zuko?
Zuko: Did I ever tell you I've got a thing for short/light hair?
_________
Zuko: And as for me, well, I started going by Zuko again, stopped thieving and basically turned it all around. But I know what the big question is. Did Mai and I ever get married?
Well I'm pleased to tell you that after years and years of asking and asking and asking... I finally said yes.
Mai: (scolding) Zuko.
Zuko: All right, I asked her.
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Chapter 3 of Purely Political is up ~
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Ao3
(rated M)
It's a little awkward between them for a few days. But soon enough, they're back to finishing eachothers’ sentences and laughing about everything and nothing.
Katara starts attending meetings about trade and international relations. She slips him notes when the council is being particularly stubborn and talks in his ear between discussions. She whispers to him the plans she's made for that day’s tea, new scrolls she’d like to share, or where she'd like to take a stroll after dinner.
Zuko finds himself happier than he can ever remember. Just her presence is enough to soothe his nerves.
The days go by quickly and the night of the roomshare finally arrives. While he's a little on edge, he knows that there isn't actually anything to be nervous about. After all, he knows nothing is going to happen between them.
Katara is already in bed by the time he enters his room and he makes sure to position himself on the very edge of the bed when he joins her. He's thankful he's had such a long day, otherwise there'd be no chance of him being able to sleep with her this close.
But it's not long before he's drifting off.
That night, Zuko dreams of Katara. He dreams of warm skim. He dreams of his hands pulling through luscious curls. He dreams of her mouth on his.. and then not.
When he wakes up, he notices two things at once. First, he's holding Katara, who's clad in nothing but sarashi wraps, against him in his arms. Second, he has a very stiff situation that's currently pressing against her backside.
Zuko is still groggy with sleep as his hips stutter forward against her on instinct before he can think to stop himself. He hears a high-pitched gasp in response and he can feel his blood run cold.
“Z-Zuko?”
Shit shit shit shit shit
He releases her at once and rolls as far from her as he can without toppling off the bed.
“Zuko, it's okay.” Her voice is full of compassion as she reaches for his arm, but he dodges her touch.
“No it's not! Nothing about this is okay!”
“Zuko, you need to calm down.”
“I DON'T NEED TO CALM DOWN! I NEED ..I need to leave.”
He can hear Katara start to say something, but he ignores her and storms out as quickly as he can.
...
Zuko doesn't mean to avoid her. At least, not at first. Meals have been awkward since that night. He doesn't know how to explain himself and Katara is still upset, based on her shortened sentences and clipped tones.
After a week of this tense atmosphere, he feels like he's losing his mind.
Then, a new set of tariffs is being introduced by the Earth kingdom ambassador and suddenly Zuko is drowning in paperwork. He takes dinner in his office that night so he can continue working.
The next day he tells himself that he’s taking his meals alone because there's still so much to do. After a couple days he finds it impossible to keep lying to himself about what he's doing. So instead, he tells himself that he’ll stop this childish evasion just as soon as he can find the words to tell her… to tell her what exactly?? I have feelings for you and I don't know how to stop them because I have no self-control. I long for you so ardently that I can feel my blood swimming in the veins of my heart everytime you hold my hand and I also cant stop thinking about pinning you against a wall and having my way with you..Fuck.
He only sees her in meetings and soon he finds himself appointing one of his advisors to take his place when he knows she'll be in attendance.
He's never felt like such a coward.
Without her near, time passes too fast and too slow. It’s now the afternoon before the night of their second roomshare, and he's banging his head against his desk trying to rattle together any coherent thoughts for how to apologize and explain himself . He's interrupted, though, by a few hard knocks on his office door.
He quickly fixes his hair and readjusts his robes to look somewhat presentable. “Enter.”
The doors swing open and there is Katara. Her eyes are red. It looks like she’s been crying and the sight makes his heart clench.
“Are you planning on avoiding me tonight too?”
“Katara, I'm not—”
“—don’t lie to me!”
“I'm sorry.” Zuko sighs, resigned. “I have been avoiding you and I’m sorry.”
“Do you not want me here?”
“No! I like having you here, I swear.” Zuko puts up his hands in surrender to her, trying to think of how to clear up this mess. “I’ve truly come to think of you as a friend.”
“A friend?” Her voice is dripping with emotions he cannot name.
“Was I being presumptuous? I’m sorry, I know we haven’t talked lately and I know it's my fault, I just—“
“I'm your wife, Zuko,” her voice is low and shaking slightly.
“I know that..”
“I'm your wife and we're meant to have a child and you don't even see me as a woman!”
Oh .
“Katara, we don't have to worry about that right now. No one is expecting that right away. The roomshare is part of the marriage contract, but it's really just tradition. We don't have to actually do anything.”
“You're being obtuse!” He doesn't like the way she folds her arms and looks at him like she knows something he doesn't.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he snaps.
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing!” She’s starting to storm out and this is not what he wanted at all.
“Katara, wait! .. I do! I do think of you as a woman.” The words start to tumble out of him and as they do, they feel like they're burning a hole in his throat. “ Of course I do. Almost too much. I mean, wasn’t it obvious? I just.. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I didn't mean to touch you like that and I'm so sorry, I mean, I know we didn't marry for love or anything and I don't want to mess this up.” She pauses and turns around, her expression softening ever so slightly. “But the last thing I want is for you to think that I don't like you being here. I'll control myself so please, just..don't feel uncomfortable around me and don’t feel like I don’t want you with me.”
Katara pauses for a moment, processing his words. Then she smiles softly and reaches out to grasp his hand. “I'm not uncomfortable. Not at all.”
Agni , how he's missed her hand in his.
…
Zuko has already laid himself down when Katara enters from the bathroom and drops her embroidered blue silk robe to reveal her sarashi wraps. His eyes linger on the bare skin in between them before he forces himself to look away. As she comes closer, he can smell the scent of jasmine on her and he swallows roughly as she joins him in bed. Her face is glowing in the candle light and he can feel his heart pounding.
“Goodnight Zuko.”
“Goodnight, Katara.”
“Umm, Zuko.. could you take out the lights?”
“Oh! Of course.” He extinguishes the flames around the room with one smooth gesture, just quickly enough to hide the flush of his cheeks.
Somehow, the room feels quieter in the darkness.
He probably won't get any sleep tonight, he thinks to himself. He can hear the clock on the wall ticking, painfully slow in the dark silence. But he can hear her gentle breaths even as he tries to focus on the nothingness.
And then she shifts, turning to her side. When she does, her body leans back into his. Her back is now brushing against his chest and he can feel a spark light up his upper body. A familiar heat he knows he’ll have to focus on to keep under control.
Then she shifts again.
Her body is flush against his. The heat starts to overwhelm him and he doesn’t even know if she’s awake.. but no, she can’t be—
“Zuko..,” Katara sighs as she leans her head into his shoulder and the sound shoots through him like lightning. His whole body stiffens up.
“What—what are you doing, Katara?”
She turns her head to meet his eyes over her shoulder.
“Zuko? I thought you wanted—”
Zuko puts a hand on her shoulder, trying not to jolt at the electricity he feels through her skin.
“Katara, I thought I was clear. We don’t have to do anything that would make you uncomfortable.”
Katara turns around to face him fully, a new ferocity in her eyes. “I’m not the one who’s uncomfortable, so stop using me as an excuse just because you are!”
Zuko tries to breathe like normal but realizes he’s forgotten how and he feels his exhales come out weak and unsteady instead.
“..It’s not that I’m uncomfortable.”
Katara reaches out carefully and holds her hand to his chest.
“You’re not?” Katara breathes in and out and he can see her chest rise and fall in the moonlight. “Do you just..not want me?
“How could I not want you?” The words are out of his mouth before he can think about what they mean.
“I want you too.”
He pinches his arm beneath the sheets cause surely he’s — Ouch ...so he’s not dreaming.
He can feel his eyes glazing over as he starts to give into the fierce heat rushing through him. He wraps an arm around her and holds her back firmly to his front.
His lips find the shell of her ear and he whispers, “You’re sure?”
He can feel the shiver down her spine and relishes the husky undertone of her voice as she replies, “I’m positive.”
...
Zuko wakes up the next morning holding a naked Katara, her head nestled into his bare chest and his arm around her with his palm splayed on the smooth skin of her lower back.
He tries to take stock of how he’s feeling but his thoughts are jumbled.
The only thing he can settle on is how wonderful she feels beside him at that moment.
She wanted him.
He still can't believe it. But he has no idea what this means beyond that or, he thinks to himself somberly, if it actually means anything at all…
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The Tale of Jin and Zuko Chapter 5: Festival of Lights
The festival of lights takes place in the city every year. It includes a fireworks display, a night market, entertainment, and a remembrance ceremony during which people light candles across the city in memory of absent or lost loved ones.
“Do you have anyone you'd like to light a candle for tonight?” Jin asks as they make their way to the festival.
“I don't know... uh, how about you?”
“I light one for my mom every year.”
“You must miss her...”
“I never really met her. She died while giving birth to me. I must admit I feel guilty about it sometimes, my dad lost the love of his life because of me.”
“It's not your fault...”
“I know... it's just hard, you know? I know my dad loves me very much but it must have been hard to raise me after that.”
“He cares about you a lot,” Zuko notes, thinking back to the stern scolding they both received from him after they snuck out just over a month ago.
“Yeah, he's a great dad,” she smiles, “We each light a candle every year in her memory. Mine is also a sign of gratitude to her for giving me life.”
They remain in sombre silence for a few moments before Jin continues, “How about your parents?” she asks, but when she feels his body tense up next to her she adds, “if you don't mind talking about it.”
After some consideration, he reveals as much as he's comfortable with, “I don't know where my mom is, she left suddenly when I was a child. We were very close.”
“That must have been difficult for you, I'm sorry...” she squeezes his hand, “you can light a candle for her if you like? This ceremony isn't just for the deceased. Maybe it'll bring you good luck and you'll find her again.”
He agrees and follows Jin's lead, lighting a candle alongside her. When the time comes he joins everyone in a minute of silence, closing his eyes and thinking of the happy memories he shared with his mom, hoping that one day they could reunite. The ache for home weighs heavy on his heart again. What he'd give to just be able to feed turtle ducks at the palace pond with her, even just once...
They grab something to eat, and then later, when the fireworks show starts they hold hands as Jin rests her head on his shoulder, watching the beautiful display of colours in the sky. As they peruse the night market, Zuko runs off for a few moments, returning to surprise Jin with a gift. He awkwardly helps her put on the dainty leather bracelet, which is decorated with a small round charm. It signifies great affection from one person to another, and they both blush lightly.
After walking around some more, Jin's face suddenly lights up with excitement, “A fortune teller! Why don’t we have our futures told?”
“I don’t know…” he says hesitantly. For the most part, he doesn't believe that fortune tellers have any validity, but in the off chance that they may be able to see something, it might risk revealing his true identity.
“Come on, don’t you want to know what the future holds?”
“I'd rather leave it up to chance,” he shrugs.
“Okay then… well, would you mind waiting for me while I get a reading? It just sounds so fun!”
“Sure, I’ll be right outside.”
“Thanks!” she gives him a quick kiss on the cheek before entering the tent.
Zuko remains in place for a minute or two, until his curiosity gets the better of him. He edges closer to the tent until he’s able to hear what’s being said inside.
“... and you will have a whirlwind romance with a very powerful bender, but they won't be of the Earth Kingdom. I sense that they may be of high social standing”, he hears an old woman's voice say.
“Have I met this person yet?”
“Yes, it seems you have already met this person. Whether you're familiar with each other or have only met in passing, I cannot say,” the old woman goes silent for a few moments, humming to herself as if she's agreeing with someone about something, before she continues in a dramatic voice, “Heed this warning child: I foresee that there is turmoil up ahead. There will come a time where you will come to feel deep sadness, a time when they‘ll leave you behind. This person carries a heavy weight on their heart, and...”
Zuko decides he's heard enough. He knew eavesdropping was a bad idea to begin with, but he wasn't expecting this. Even though he thought fortune-tellers were quacks for the most part there was no denying how apt the reading was. A bender of high standing, not from the Earth Kingdom... but worst of all, if what the woman says is true, he'll come to cause Jin great pain in the future.
Invasive thoughts repeat over and over in his head, “ She's too good for me. She deserves better. She's better off without me.”
He walks across the plaza to get out of earshot, but as he reaches the other side something draws his attention away from his thoughts: a poster of a lost Sky Bison. The Avatar is in Ba Sing Se. He rips it off the wall and clenches it tightly in his fist, and a deep anger he hadn’t felt in a while starts to bubble over in him once again. He decides he was a fool for thinking he could change, thinking he'd be at peace here.
“There you are,” he hears Jin say from behind him, smiling brightly, “What are you up to?”
“I’ve got to go,” he says flatly, not able to look her in the eyes.
“Why? What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
“It’s complicated…”
“Oh, come on, not this again!” she exclaims in agitation, the first time Zuko had ever heard this kind of emotion in her usually cheerful voice.
“I’ve got to go,” he says again, turning around. Jin tries to grab onto his arm to stop him but he shrugs her off.
“Lee? Lee!”
He ignores Jin’s calls and walks away, yelling in agitation when someone accidentally bumps into him, “Look where you're going, peasant!”
He has another chance to regain his honour and he won’t let it slip away this time. No one will get in his way. Jin looks on horrified at his sudden outburst, and is left heartbroken yet again.
Also on Ao3
#fanfic#fanfiction#ao3#zuko fanfic#zuko#prince zuko#zuko x jin#earth kingdom girl jin#atla#avatar the last airbender#atla fanfic#atla fic#zuko fic#jinko#zujin#my otp#otp#otptober
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