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#I was supposed to go after 3 months
wtfuckevenknows · 8 months
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Things I’m not looking forward to:
The fucking cancer check up tomorrow @thebumblecee and @beautifulhigh bullied me into 🙃
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diathadevil · 5 months
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Do you ever think about how Fakir, after him and Ahiru finally broke everything that kept the town of Goldkröne in the ghostly hands of its writer, after they finally have some air of peace over the town finally being able to live in its intended early 2000s environment, that Fakir still feels at times like it's not real and that for a while he fears that if he closes his eyes it'll be back in Drosselmeyer's control. Like it just doesn't feel real to him during that first year of calm, until he feels the dull pain on his recovering hand injury and Ahiru who follows him without a pendant anywhere to be found.
He doesn't feel it's real, the calm finality of this town, but he makes sure to feel the scar on his hand. And he makes sure to hold the little duck and realize that she is who she has always been. Him and the town are finally living peacefully.
#dia talks#princess tutu#He probably starts planning on writing Ahiru into the world mayyybe like 3-4 months into his recovery#he doesn't know what a cell phone is yet but he sure as hell can look at a bookstore and ask for a notebook and pens#i bet that first year in Goldenkröne must be hell because trading deals bring all sorts of new things into the town#Just Fakir going “what the fuck is a scooter?? Wait what's a CAR---”#he ends up having to read a bunch of newspaper articles about “Goldenkröne booming in German tourism!”#Actually does he even know his country's name... Did they all even know they lived in Germany and not JUST a city????#Drosselmeyer would've really pulled one on them for only talking about the city and its outskirts and NOT the country it resided in#But let's assume they did know. Fakir would have to figure out so much has changed in 2002 Germany compared to whatever time they were in#My god just thinking about the thought of Fakir learning what a television is... or a radio for that matter has me howling internally#local amateur writer is put into a coma after hearing for the very first time german rapper Sido#alternatively: local amateur writer's brain explodes after hearing german Happycore artist Blümchen and dance pop group No Angels#ptutu spoiler#i know its a +20 old show but just in case people wanna watch it i love it enough to tag the post show headcanon#ptutu analysis#ptutu headcanon#ptutu post canon#Also sorry i keep jumbling between Goldkröne and Goldenkröne in the writing its 4 AM and the german part of my brain is a mess lmao#(its supposed to be Goldkröne but for some reason I keep making it into the attribute word Golden so dont mind the mistake)#(if you do i will sob please be gentle towards my polyglot self)
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songtwo · 2 months
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idk i think my bf might be developing a drinking problem and i just don’t know what to do…..
#it’s been going on for a couple of months now but he promised he would stop and he had been doing well until today….#and it’s like. on one hand i never wanted to be w an alcoholic and i told him straight so he promised it would stop#but on the other hand i can’t just abandon him#and it’s like we used to go out a lot and party but like. that was it but ever since he met this guy he just gets lost when he drinks w him#and the thing was he got like aggressive like he didn’t do anything to me and i can’t really explain it but he just wasn’t himself#and like. we talked about it a million times and it’s not like it happens every week#it’s been like 5 times since december#but 3 have been on the past month alone#and two weeks ago it got bad like he almost got into an accident#and like i’m not even physically w him anymore like we really only see each other once a week since i moved#and from the very first time it happened i told him i couldn’t be w him if it kept happening#and after that incident two weeks ago he swore it was the last time but it just happened again#by the way he and that guy get wasted it really is a miracle they get home alive#and like. idk what to do#i really don’t want to be w someone like this#and i hate feeling like this like if i were to think only about myself i don’t want this i hate feeling like this#but i also can’t abandon him#like not even bc i would miss him or whatever i just wouldn’t feel good leaving him alone#but like i don’t want to live like this#maybe i’ll ask for some time to just figure things out#but it’s gonna suck so bad bc we were supposed to see kendrick lamar next week and then we already had plans for his bday and omfg#i don’t wanna leave but i don’t want things to be like this either#and i asked him to stop and gave him multiple chances but idk#i just don’t know what to do#i love him endlessly but i need to put myself first but i can’t abandon him:(#and our 1.5 anniversary was also next week…..#but i think time is the sanest and safest thing right now
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todayisafridaynight · 5 months
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can i say the line and say infinite wealth drops in two months
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cringeghostking · 1 year
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“What happened to the other Guards? To our family?! …It wasn’t wild magic, was it?”
[rolls up late to the fandom with starbucks trauma] 😎
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quietwingsinthesky · 1 year
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the thing about me is that I have this need to pick up every angel on supernatural by their scruff and place them into an enclosure that will allow them to, if not heal and become better, than at least to be petty and vindictive in a way that causes less death and destruction and is just kind of annoying. which I would argue is also good for them. let angels make choices where the consequences of their actions are non-existent rather than world-ending. teaches them free will in a safe, healthy way.
#this is still about Zachariah to be clear#it’s about all of them. I’m putting them all in such nice enclosures. with so much enrichment#but mostly this is about Zachariah. just kind of want to put him in an actual office and watch him whirr away. maybe he prints things.#stands at a water cooler and makes awkward small talk.#I don’t know what happens in offices. what do I look like. I don’t think he does either really. he just likes the aesthetic#he’s constantly cosplaying and it makes all the other angels slightly uncomfortable like. Okay Zach We Get It. This Is Your Businessman OC.#Can We Please Go Back To Talking About How To Stop Castiel From Breaking Containment For The Fifth Time This Month.#(my integration of old and new angel rebellion canon is per s5 all angels have the capacity to rebel. and many do. often. and are punished#for it. and also per s8 Cas just does it the most because he is so sooo annoying <3#also maybe because a combination of factors like. Anna is his boss for a lot of that time and she goes lighter on the reprogramming because#she’s already having doubts. and then also he’s paired with Uriel always. they make each other question things. but they also work#too well together for Heaven to separate them. the cost isn’t so high (yet) just toss them in the brain cleaner after each assignment#and they’re still useful.)#sorry this was supposed to be about Zachariah.#his enclosure has fax machines in it. he likes them. you know. the same way most angels like radio towers. he *likes* them.#spn#Zachariah spn
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yohankang · 1 year
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good morning besties i feel like i'm in a movie
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running-in-the-dark · 2 months
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I know I've been particularly incoherent for the past few days (again), and it's so dramatic and ridiculous but it seriously feels like something is punishing me. I just want to like things a normal amount. I just want to like people and characters a normal amount.
I don't want to become so fully obsessed that literally nothing else exists and thinking about anything else feels like my brain is being stabbed with a thousand tiny knives. I don't want to need to find every piece of information I possibly can on whoever it is this time. I don't want to feel like I'm (literally) losing my mind when I see them. I don't want any of this!
I can not believe that I exist as a human being on this stupid planet just to get obsessed with people over and over and over again forever.
#like it's not. fun. it's not 'oh haha I just like this guy a lot :3' no it feels like. dying.#like I said I know it's fucking dramatic I know. but it feels SO BAD#and sometimes SO GOOD because nothing else gives my brain that feeling but god damn it most of the time it's just painful#maybe I should try drugs#probably.#maybe I should start drinking again#that made it bearable#but no that's. stupid#but my god how am I supposed to go through this again and again and again so many times in a row#I don't know how to explain how fucking devastating it is to attach yourself to. some stupid idiot (I'm sorry I don't mean that.). only to#not really care anymore after a couple months#what do you MEAN. I literally love this person with every stupid fibre of my stupid being and now he's just. some guy again??#I don't know. how. not to do this. it's not a choice! it's not something I DO. it HAPPENS to me.#and it only doesn't happen when I'm so depressed that I want to actively die.#anyway yeah it's about John Larroquette and Dan Fielding and Jenkins and yeah I'm the fucking stupidest fucking dumbass on earth#someone hit me in the head to fix my brain please#and seriously this is not normal. it can not be normal. this is not how normal people feel about stuff. it can't be#I think this is why I don't get fandom culture. and shipping specifically. like. no I'm not. I'm not enjoying these characters. I'm not#watching this show and thinking aww these two should kiss :)#I'm. not there anymore. I don't fucking exist. all I do. is think about this person. I can't stop it.#I am not a person when I don't feel like this. I'm not even real. I'm just whoever I'm obsessed with. I say that so much but that's how it#feels! I'm not real.#so anyway when I say 'haha I'm fine' what I mean is no I'm not someone make my brain work right please#I just. see him and start crying. because it's so overwhelming.#maybe I should find a therapist and hope they speak English and show them this post :)#haha no that's ridiculous I could never mention this to a normal person#guess I'll just keep driving myself to insanity with this crap.#personal
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welcometoteyvat · 5 months
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rant ahead lmao
i believe your gripes are completely valid because i have the same gripes. it feels like their storytelling (for the entire game) is all over the place. the high cloud quintet is literally something i’ve never chanced upon in the game. i only know it via fandom. this is similar to how that pyro butterfly lady is the crimson witch. only those who dig deep enough into the game will find out about it, and just like genshin, such “information” spreads quickly in the community.
HOWEVER, what genshin does better than star rail is that its main story DOES NOT rely on these snippets to tell its story. do i need to know she was the crimson witch when what happened to her happened? no. not at all. she was there for X purpose in the main storyline and therefore she did what she had to do and left. her being crimson witch was to add depth to her character which the main story had no space to do so.
stair rail, on the other hand, EXPECTS you to find out all these little tidbits, which to me is too time consuming and annoying. why split the story into its separate segments if i need to know them in order to understand the main story?? that’s just poor storytelling imho.
i think you’ll like this video. i agree with it. i get that the funeral for fox character was supposed to be emotional, but this video is right that we know NOTHING about this character. from my own personal experience, the funeral was so boring and honestly irritating because i. don’t. care. in fact, i didn’t even know she was with us throughout the quest so when she had her background voicelines i was always so confused????
i feel the hype around the characters is because the designs of each character have given people a desire to seek more about said characters, and there is abundance information. but this shouldn’t be something to expect of the players.
give me a reason to care that’s not just aesthetics, please.
video will be sent in next ask.
video: https://youtu.be/vaPL0UZK_HQ?si=puvssJPBLc2H57vk
ok thank you for validating me LMAO i was constantly wondering "where is the ancient dead people lore" (hcq) during the entire quest chain, which unfortunately contained very little of what fandom promised me (character depth). apparently i've not be reading enough books and pamphlets you can collect since the lore is concentrated there and in limited character's character stories
tbh I think the reveal that La Signora was the Crimson Witch was also really bad lol, for the same reason that the video argues DH IL's transformation is unimpactful. like "omg wow alternate identity revealed!" but it doesn't really have any impact on the conflict of the story we're currently looking at. they could've just switched it, or not even given her a transformation, instead just showing an extended duel with us and making it visible that she was tired and out of power before she dies, and I don't really know if anything would've changed. same with dan heng IL, I'd probably get more out of it if I read the hcq book from that one opera performer, but ehh there wasn't enough visibly shown leadup, like you said.
I guess the difference between genshin world lore (things in artifacts, weapons, books, world quests etc) and star rail lore is that genshin's is either about the past or future, but not necessarily about the present characters? thinking about the pale flame lore, which gave everyone the fatui crumbs before scara and la signora's stories were introducted in the main storyline, the enkanomiya quests about the vishaps and ancient history of teyvat, and the narzissenkreuz quests that also connect to that + khaenriah + a host of other world lore things. I guess it's nice that reading through all the materials isn't "mandatory" because it's either about the ancient past, dead npcs (so many of the artifact sets) or foreshadowing for important elements in the future that will still get introduced in the main story. I will be biased and agree w you, star rail's lore crumbs are rather :\ storytelling. like I would be fine if the hidden nuggets of lore were about >npcs >lore that happened but is not directly relevant to a character's main arc >foreshadowing for future events/story. but instead it's more like mandatory background reading that is crucial to understand a character's stories, instead of enriching your knowledge of them? anyways yeah
now abt tingyun. I agree that the funeral was really ???????????? i agree w you and the video lol. playing it, I was mostly in disbelief that we're assuming tingyun is legitimately dead even though she's still playable (no dead playables in genshin moment). I also think the thing with the 3 npcs we had to talk to was bullshit because. like the video said, we could've spent time with tingyun (maybe visiting the npcs we collected things from) BEFORE she died and maybe it would have given us more emotional impact. the way they retroactively show how kind and generous she was really put me off, we could've seen this all in person instead of hearing it from other people...... bruh also the way everyone got together in that cutscene when i dont think any of them were really shown to have a deep connection w her is so ..... >_> the emotional impact did not hit whatsoever
but I'm gonna level with you I think they made her role as our guide pretty clear and the implication that she was traveling with us was also pretty clear. no shade though
about the rest of the video: oh he put things into words that I could not articulate JSDKLFJDSKL. not really any thoughts but i agree that a lot of the characters (qingque, xueyi especially) could have just been cut T_T i like both of their designs and personalities based on other material in game but their main quest participation was Not It rip. also agree about the characters being vehicles for exposition and not having their personalities shine through. I'd argue maybe you can tell somewhat of what they're like (jing yuan, fu xuan, yanqing to some extent) but man there's just too much lore explaining for them to really show what they do on a normal schedule it's so .......... also because fanart and fanfic makes them seem so fun im standing here looking at the main plot like >_> <_< what was that. i'm sure it gets better inside their own companion quests, which I haven't done, but that shouldn't be the only place the character gets to really shine lmao
I agree that their design makes people more willing to invest but god I'm so sorry hsr designs really aren't my thing, the color palettes are just incredibly bad JDKSFLJDSKLGHKDJ the only thing holding up the story are the plot and personalities of chars and neither of those were delivered ...
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sadderrall · 3 months
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someone did some fucked up shit like real fucked up shit then stopped responding and when i realized they weren’t gonna respond i told them “i’ll haunt you like your dead grandma” and apparently that’s the worst thing anyone has ever said to this person and im sorry girl but i hope someone who isn’t a nice person is mean to you one of these days
#so this fucking bitch ok#her bf got kicked out of his house with he was staying with her#she rents a room and her roommates said they don’t give a fuck if he stays a bit#last night i let him stay a few days bc she was ‘overstimulated’#keep in mind the bf is homeless rn since he got kicked out#he stays a few days#she picks him up right before new years#few days later he calls me up and tells me she told him she’s gonna take 3 years to focus on school and worth both full time#and only see him two days out of the month#and where does she tell him he’s going?#my house#when was i asked about this?#never#so she drops him off on the 10th#picks him up a few days later again#and while they’re leaving he says ‘i’ll be back on the 19th’#so i guess that was when he was supposed to live with me#in a studio apartment#for 3 years#a day after she dropped him off i hit my social limit#i messaged her ‘imma need you to come pick him up after work’#she starts spamming me asking me what’s going on#then before i had even told him i asked her she calls him and starts yelling at him telling him she’s not picking him up#and to go to a homeless shelter#so i tell her dude he’s your boyfriend he needs help just help him#and she’s like i can’t pick him up im sorry#and i was like dude no im putting up a boundary you need to come get your man#AND YOU KNOW WHAT SHE FUCKING SAID?#‘i’m putting up a boundary too im not picking him up’#bitch you dump your boyfriend at my house without asking me you don’t get to put up boundary
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just-another-wren · 8 months
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forgot to post this lil sketch!~
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Hold up, during the first s4 byler heart-to-heart they are in Jonathan's room. Why?? Someone made a map of the Byers' Lenora house but i don't remember their username. So according to them, Will's room is downstairs while the rest of the bedrooms are upstairs. The previous scene to this when we see the cali group is when they are in the living room and Owen's "friends" are explaining to them what happened with El and what they have to do. Then Mike got El's note and went upstairs to her room to read it. So did Will go upstairs to check in on Mike and somehow they ended up in Jonathan's room? So much to think about.
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tiredbiostudent · 2 years
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august!
#got a new tent and I’m in love😭#I’m going backpacking next week and I’m SO pumped even if it’s supposed to be thunderstorming the first two days 😩 lol#life update is that I’ve mostly just been trying to organize my life after being gone for work for like 3 months#and I’m practicing driving a lot bc my test is at the end of the month😭 it’s going better than I thought but still stressful#also going to college in the fall and still not sure how to feel about it LMAO#i think I’m just worried I’m not gonna make any friends the entire year and I’m gonna hate it and have the program be a waste of time#I’m sure it’ll be fine?🥴#and I’m STILL contemplating about doing a masters shdhdhdg#bc ok I loved the job I had this summer and would happily do contract field bio jobs for the rest of my life but unfortunately it’s not very#stable and doesn’t pay super well so at some point I’m going to need to get a more formal job which I might need an MSc for :/ we’ll see#the idea of research and /being/ a grad student is so appealing but then I think about the actual work I’d have to do and it’s like um my#i always feel like shit in august and am so yugh because it’s friggen hot and there’s nothing to do and I have definitely been feeling that#(also because I miss work and being up north)#but I just scrolled through my ‘insp’ instagram saved posts and Pinterest board and am acc feeling good today hshdhdgxhd#like you know when you’re just excited about life 🥰✨ hehe#omg sorry for this I guess I just needed to dump my thoughts out onto the ground for everyone#mine
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leofrith · 1 year
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*vibrating in excitement* yes yes YES you should watch black sails it’s amazing
YES i wanna do it!! really badly!!! i've been sitting on it for like, i wanna say at least five years? maybe over the weekend i'll start it
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orcelito · 8 months
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Tally's just a liiiiittle bit fed up with my clinginess today
Can't help it tho. She's my baby.
#speculation nation#and i spent an hour in a panic spiral over her and then 5 more hours compartmentalizing and Not Thinking About It#she's fine though. just got a little sick this morning but she seems to be feeling better.#probably just ate smth she wasnt supposed to. it happens.#but ykno. i hesitate to throw around the word 'trauma' willy-nilly. considering it has a lot of weight to it.#but i really do think ive got some trauma due to the cat deaths.#how else would i explain me having a whole panic spiral over tally just throwing up?#it almost makes me wonder whether i should bother with more cats after them. but i know i couldnt live without them.#ive spent all but 3 years of my entire life living with cats. i cant live without them.#but after some untimely ends i am just... so fucking afraid.#tally's about 3 years old now. she should have plenty of life left to live.#but cassy wasnt even 2 years old. and look how that turned out.#i got young cats purposefully bc i didnt want to have to say goodbye to them for a While. and then i had to anyways.#and im always so fucking anxious that im going to have to again. constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop#so when Anything happens i end up a total mess no matter how minor it is...#im sick of it. im so sick of the uncertainty. sick of being scared ill wake up one day to another cat dying.#and theres not really any way to make it better. days and weeks and months and hopefully years#just spent waiting for the other shoe to drop.#i just hope it wont come for a while still. so i can have at least a few years of peace.#animal death ment/#negative/#sorry for the vent etc etc im just. i wish i could bundle them up and keep them in my life forever.#but it doesnt work that way unfortunately. lifetime disparity really is so awful.
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listening to don't let the light go out on loop for days
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