Mereoleona Vermillion x f.reader (with some NSFW)

@vermillionflames (insert a ton of needless information on why I suck) If you get bored of reading the non nsfw part, scroll down to the highlighted zone , lower it is the a bit more mature content. As I have mentioned before, sorry, Becca! Also, it’s like 3 a.m for me now, I haven’t edited a single thing, I am not even sure it’s written in English, lol. Goodnight! __________________

"I am afraid!" 

"There is nothing to be afraid of, you are a proud lion, aren't you?"

Mereoleona looked down at a young man laying his head on her lap, a profound puddle of red liquid seeping into her clothes. Another handful of blood and he won't be able to recover. For most of her life, the proud lioness lived alone, had to fend for her life in the wilderness where only the fittest survive and back when she still lived in the capital, her family, friends, other royal knights, all of them seemed at least decent enough not to get killed in a battle. Today though, she was facing a different type of reality. For the first time, she felt lonely and desperate amidst the cruelty of this world. 

"You shall not die," a low growl vibrated in her throat. "MEDICS, WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY?!" 

Her shouts were wasted. A couple of Crimson Lion knights standing beside her had neither healing powers nor the mental capacity to comprehend that their teammate is surely dying right in front of them. 

There was nothing anyone could do. Only wait. Observe the skin turning paler until they cannot make out another plea of help through the blood spilling into lungs, throat... Reality hurts. 

"I am useless," whispered the ginger female slightly shaking. 

A droplet fell. Then another one and another. Suddenly, the scene was engulfed in a rainy mist. And so, the tragic end came. 

Interposed in the thunder, puddles began echoing. The next instance Mereoleona was pushed to the side with a "move it" said in a calm demeanor. A young woman looked the bleeding man up and down and after a brief evaluation began moving her hands through the injuries. Several strands of unruly hair fell onto her focused eyes, sticking to long black eyelashes. 

"I am sorry to be asking this of you," she began without unnecessarily moving a muscle. "could you please wipe the hair out of my eyes? It feels irritating, but I cannot move." 

Mereoleona reached out her hand. A bloody trace of two fingers was left on the woman's forehead, but she simply smiled and thanked.

Usually, when every second counts and minutes can determine whether a person lives or dies, the time passes slowly. This time though everything was over in a wink. Triumphantly, the mysterious lady leaned back. Her face gentle and smiling. The man won't die.

Dense rainfall wouldn't stop, seemingly unable to read the lightened mood, it kept on falling to mourn a loss. 

"TAKE HIM AND HURRY," the substitute captain roared gaining her sanity back. The party came upon an abandoned shack in the middle of the fields and decided to take shelter there, the woman from before still tagging along. 

A nicely burning fire and a roof above their heads, they have decided to stay here for the night. Having finished the roasted boar Mere caught for dinner, they now where sound asleep. Still feeling restless, the ginger-haired woman decided to go out and take a breath outside on the porch, her, now clean, hands reached out towards the everlasting stream of sky water. She could still see blood on her skin, feel how sticky and different this blood was from that of her foes. 

"Some things are inevitable," a voice said from behind her. Wrapped in a blanket sat the woman from before. She felt uneasy to stay in the same room with unfamiliar men and chose to come out onto the porch. "Even if you do everything in your power, there comes a time when it's not enough," she came closer and put the blanket over the taller female which earned her an eyebrow raise. Voice as soft as a prayer for the peace in the world whispered "sometimes... you just have to see them off with a smile." 

"I reject this kind of logic." 

"Eh? Miracles do not happen!" the girl protested. 

"You say that as you popped out like one yourself. Although yes, I agree with you, miracles do not happen, but you can prevent mistakes from happening." 

"Eventually you will break. The future is set in stone." 

The ginger-haired woman turned around with a huge grin, "I will break the stone it is set in," she bolstered flaring up her mana making the blanket burn off in cinders. 

Her companion simply stood there admiring the ashes fly off. The one in front of her was certainly not your everyday person, something was captivating about her, to the point you get intrigued to see them in any state of mind. "I want to be there," she said.

"Hm? You want to be where?" 

"When you lose the battle against fate or... when you run to set the heavens ablaze, I wish to be there and see you, you are fascinating!"

Mereoleona blinked for a moment but the very next second got back her confidence retorting, "If you want to be there, then you must reach my level first." 

"Mmm. I will, do not worry. As a fact, I am traveling to the capital right now," she took out her grimoire and proudly tossed it up a few times into the air. 

"Oho? What for?" Mere felt a sadistic intent rise deep within. 

"I plan to join the magic knights. You people are magic knights, right? You must have heard of the Crimson Lion King, the squad led by the famous Vermillion family? Aaah, I have been admiring them for so long and I finally get the chance to see them." 

"What's so good about them?" 

"How can you be a mage and not understand it?! They don't base their judgment on your status or your wealth even the current level you are on isn't as much of a factor as the potential and your determination. And the new captain, Mereoleona Vermillion, I have heard so many fantastic stories about her, though everyone is saying she is terrifying. I wish to feel what it is like to be under her guidance one day." 

As the girl kept on ranting about the idolized female sorcerer, her partner couldn't contain her laughter anymore. What an interesting creature she found along the path. One moment she is consoling her, acting superior, next she's ranting about her beloved Mereoleona without knowing who she is talking to in the first place.

"Ah, I like you, girl!" she looked back thrilled. 

"I am very pleased to have met you too... Um... did we exchange names?" 

"Mereoleona Vermillion. Welcome to the squad, from today on, you are a member of the Crimson Lion King and soon enough you will feel the pleasure of burning under my guidance!"

*** *** ***

"Hm, it seems we have five days off starting tomorrow," a female chimed walking down the street. 

"Perfect for some vigorous training," another one responded to her. 

The first woman stopped and looked back with dead-bored eyes, then gazed away and kept on walking without saying a word. The atmosphere turned cold instantly followed by silence stinging painfully. 

It has been over 2 years since the fateful day when Mereoleona met a strange yet charismatic woman out on a mission. 2 long years filled with hard work to prove herself and years of Mere's admiration growing until it finally blossomed in love. They now were dating, but even though their love vows have been said after getting to know each other in and out, incidents like this still kept on occurring between them. Someone as bright as the ginger-haired female's lover doesn't go silent unless they are genuinely hurt. For Mereoleona, other people's feelings were a mystery. Even though normally she wouldn't feel even the slightest bit bothered, when it comes to her most important person, she couldn't stand seeing the smile vanish from her face. 

"Ahaha, yea, you are right, I still have a long way to go," the girl laughed and turned around to face her lover with a huge grin. Which was fake. 

"Tell me straight... I am not as good as you with humans and their emotions," this time, Mereoleona's voice indicated pain. 

"Ah, I did not mean that, I am sorry," with a quick motion she stepped in front of Mere and took her hand lifting it to her lips, gently planting a kiss and then putting it against her own cheek. "I want to spend more time with you," she smiled with an honest sparkle in her eyes. "I was thinking that the two of us could run somewhere, anywhere really, as long as it is you and me." 

Both of them stood there blushing. The hand pressed against the woman's cheek turned around holding her face still. Then, two lips met in a soft kiss that seemed to be too sweet for the girl to handle. Right before her knees could give out, they parted. 

"Leave it to me," the eldest Vermillion said leaving her girlfriend still in shock. 

It did not take long for them to reach the approximate location of their 5 days long logging, but before getting the privilege to rest in a warm bed embracing each other, they had to go through a forest that even thieves pass in a circle. By the time their hands landed on the doorknob of a hut in the middle of a plain, surrounded by thick bushes, it was already a dark orange evening with sun way bellow the horizon. Tired, dirty, and sweaty the woman overlooked the energetic one with jealousy. 

"A challange, how else," she chuckled to herself dropping the bags down.

"Are you disappointed?" Mereoleona studied the girl's face. 

"No. It wouldn't be you if these things weren't included and I couldn't love you any other way. Though, I must insist that from now on, no more special-monster-challange-deluxes, okay, love?" her voice took up a threatening note. 

"Yes, I know. Don't worry. From now on, there's only rest. Do you want to go take a dip in the the hot stream?" 

"There is one?" the woman asked turning around excited. 

"Of course, did you expect we will be enjoying a freezing lake?" 

"... I mean, even a freezing lake can turn into a volcano with you..." she said recalling various instances.

Mereoleona yanked a towel off a wooden rack by the door and turned back to her girlfriend "I will be going first, don't stay here too long. Do not forget, I will be waiting." Her step did not lack the usual confidence nor seemed tired even the tiniest bit. Far from it. She seemed to be standing straighter with her shoulders and neck tense as if a beast ready to jump its prey.

It certainly was warm inside the cabin but the temperature magically rose higher as Mereoleona closed the doors as she walked through. The young woman, now left alone, began touching her blazing cheeks, then fanning at them. In her mind, the moment she walked out the door, any layer hiding her bruised skin will be ripped off and even more skin will be broken from Mereoleona's overbearing kisses. Even as she was thinking that, her hands dug deeper into the bags searching for the negligee she bought exclusively for this occasion. Various garter belts flew on the bed with dark, white and burgundy laced panties, some nightgowns, meant to be used during summer and as such more revealing, scattered all around the floor, yet, nothing seemed good enough until her attention was caught by the second white towel hanging on the wall. Sometimes, the simpler way is the right way, she thought snatching it with more force than her beloved minutes ago.

"Hey! Don't tell me you cannot move anymore! Should I make you?” a roar resounded from the outdoor bath.

Flustered and in a hurry, she threw off the clothes, wrapping the piece of cloth around her. This sweet type of anxiety made the woman's hand tremble as it pushed the door open. 

The nightly breeze swiped past the heated body standing in the doorway cooling it down a mere bit. Mereoleona was in the water, facing towards the door, but her eyes wandered through the shape and texture of a sake bottle which she held high towards the sky. There was no way she did not hear the door opening, nevertheless, the melancholic sight of her did not change into the usual rowdy one.

Taking a shy step forward, the other female looked around admiring the untouched nature while breathing the aroma of the vespertine flora surrounding them deep into her lungs. “How gorgeous,” a whisper passed her lips making the ginger set the bottle aside and look back. They both were looking directly into each other's eyes.

“Are you going to join me?” an extended hand offered a cup to the girl on the shore. 

As if on a cue, the moment the towel dropped down to the floor, Mereoleona turned her attention to the side gulping down her own cup.

//////////////// THE RED ZONE ////////////////

They sat shoulder to shoulder in water, facing the crescent moon, enjoying each other and the sake. Or so it seemed. Previous teases from the lioness made her partner assume that they will be embracing one another immediately after their bodies came close enough. Unlike her, the ginger was leisurely sipping on sake, talking about things that entirely passed past her ears even if all the concentration was solely on her. The way her lips move, how they touch together, and then part again giving a glimpse of the tongue which should be on her. Her eyes ran through the peaceful silhouette of her lover, going down her collarbone with water droplets racing to the plump chest which seemed as soft as ever, then to the side, muscular arms resting on top of the rocks, long slender fingers tapping on them. She could almost feel them provoking a moan out of her lips as they play with her nipples indulging the idea of seeing her squirm underneath. Mereoleona must have had no clue what was going in her girlfriend's mind. As she has mentioned before, she's bad with human emotions and sometimes, even the great lioness needs to be shown the way.

First a single digit, then a whole palm touched to Mereoleona's cheek and gently cupped it capturing her attention. Just as slowly, keeping her eyes low, she moved onto her Mereoleona's lap and impatiently clung to her neck locking their gazes again.

“Is something the matter?” the ginger's voice void of any distinct emotions questioned. 

“Mere...” 

A puff of air, hotter than the steam from the hot spring flied out into the air. One of the woman's hands clung to Mereoleona's shoulder when the other was pulling towards her by the neck, then relaxing and letting her slide back down the lioness's legs in a motion which made her tingle with further excitement.

“Could it be that you are having certain cravings right now?” 

“Mhm,” was all the girl was able to mutter.

Mereoleona cast her eyes downwards. The clear water allowed her to see the repetitive motion which has not ceased on her lap. Going up, the curves of the younger woman's torso swayed hypnotically, asking to be held. Prominent breasts kept on making contact with hers, both pairs so earnestly excited. Finally, eyes brimming in lust, hunger, passion and most importantly – love. She moved her hand to the girl's lips, traced them gently, “I don't think you want me hard enough,” her eyes creased as she smiled uncovering her white canines. “Prove that you want me, tell me what I could do to stop this growing frustration in you.”

“Your hands... Mere, you know...”

“Show me, what you want them to do, my damsel in distress,” her eyes shimmered and the woman took Mereoleona's hands and slowly made them travel up her tights towards her bottom. “Huh, that's all?”

“Squeeze it.”

Doing as she was told, she squeezed it but seizing the opportunity, also pulled her even closer. The woman's chest and neck were in her reach. “Should I kiss you on the neck?” she chuckled nuzzling her nose closer.

“Bite it.” 

“Ha, usually you are annoyed saying I bite too much. But if it pleases you...”

She gripped at the curves she was admiring before as she lovingly left bite marks on her neck and areas around, coming back to leave a more serious mark on each. Every time her lips made contact with the heated skin, she'd peek at the girl gripping her shoulder and now somehow her hair as well. “What if I did this?” her fingers slid across the most sensitive area which was surely wet from more than the water and taking their time, kept a steady pace stroking it. 

“Did I prove it to you?” the woman asked catching her breath.

“I am merely giving you a small free-by, you will have to work more to prove yourself.” Mereoleona took back her fingers and licked them. “I can barely taste you, everything washes off. We should go to bed. You walk first.”

Mereoleona sat back waiting, letting the girl rise from her lap quivering. Walking, she stopped to look back only to see two blue irises appraising her backside. When she made it past the door and stood in front of the bed, she could feel the other female behind her leaning forward though eagerly waiting. Mereoleona's hand caught her chin forcing it to the side just a bit more. Their lips joined for a rough kiss which was more becoming for the lioness than the gentle teases out in the pool. One of her hands slid to the front and once again began working its way around the woman's sensitive lower abdomen. Hungrily she pushed her forwards making the two of them topple onto the bed. She inserted one of her fingers inside the woman making her arch her back, pushing her ass up. There was a great deal of frustration involved making this experience more ecstatic than usual. And when she began feeling her premature orgasm coming by shouting Mereoleona's name into the duvet beneath her, the woman took her fingers out. Both of them were panting heavily.

“Didn't we come here so I could taste you properly?” she said grabbing one of the garter belts that flew on the bed earlier. Mereoleona helped her lie on her back after tying her wrists together. “A good knight always sticks to their word,” she smiled again lowering her face to her lover's dripping sweetness. Like a feline, she licked gently, tasting it at first, then again, and again, until her lips were sucking and tugging as her hands held tightly on the woman's hips constantly pulling her sensitively bolting body back.

The cabin drowned in screams of pleasure not even stopping once she orgasmed. Satisfied, Mereoleona pulled back, coming next to her girlfriend and untying her bound arms. The woman had some tears rolling down, “Was it too much?” the lioness asked with a hint of unrest.

“No, you were amazing.” She pulled Mereoleona closer. They kissed not rushing anywhere. Parting, coming back just like the wind passing nocturnal meadows; gently and in waves. “I never knew you were such a great actor,” the two of them laughed.

“It certainly was hard not eating you out then and there. Still... You certainly seem ready for this trip,” she picked a pair of thongs from the pillow. “I would like to see a little show now, would you mind?” Mereoleona extended the garter from before along with the panties. “I am still as hungry as I was moments ago."

Kdrama recs Part 1

Hullo and welcome to the kdrama life @camsthisky​! The following list is not in any particular order, other than the fact that I start with a more rom/com vibe and head toward more romantic/action or action. All the following kdramas are set in the modern day, and part 2 of my recs for you will be either darker kdramas set in present day or historical dramas.

Let the list begin!

1. Strong Woman Do Bong Soon: 

Do Bong Soon is a v smol woman who has super strength and who wants 1. To create her own video game 2. Get her police officer crush to return her affections. Which like, police officer is kinda cute but he ain’t that special. Bong Soon winds up becoming a bodyguard to Ahn Min Hyuk, the extremely rich, kinda spoiled, ridiculously extra CEO of a gaming company who does not like the police for secret reasons, and sadly does not have a good relationship with his family. (He a lonely boy underneath everything.) Min Hyuk finds out about Bong Soon’s powers, is in TOTAL awe of her, offers to train her in fighting, and literally falls head over heels for her.

The caveat with this show is there is a subplot or two that annoy me, BUT I just use the 10 second skip button and it is totally worth it because the romance is super cute—SUPER CUTE (also I have a list of favorite actors and Park Hyung Sik is def on it—one minute he is an adorkable, blushing bby the next he can be intense and sad)

He cute

2. Her Private Life: 

Hello fake-dating!! Ryan Gold (an adoptee who didn’t live in Korea for a while) is a former artist who stopped painting because he couldn’t deal with his Stendhol (?) syndrome (among other traumas). Deok Mi is the classy art curator of a famous museum who definitely does not have any secrets she wants to keep from the world—well, other than the fact that she is the number one fangirl of kpop idol, Cha Shi-an (who also appreciates art) and has a major crush on him. Ryan becomes director of the art museum and there is a whole thing with getting Shi-an involved in an art show.

Following this and a series of unfortunate events a false rumor starts that Deok Mi and and Shi-an ARE dating. It’s a little complicated to summarize, but basically what you need to know is that Ryan and Deok Mi become a fake couple so there won’t be a scandal for Shi-an or violence done to Deok Mi by rabid fangirls. I enjoy the fake-dating trope a lot, and how it becomes real for both of them! The leads are played by Kim Jae Wook and Park Min Young, who both have incredible range. Lots of soft moments in this one! Good kisses, a scene where the faves bake together, and also Ryan wears a lot of deep v-neck shirts and jackets which is an attack on me personally.

The show also contains a bit of angst, which I LOVE. Hand-holding becomes an important theme 😊

RYAN NO

3. Crash Landing on You: Rich South Korean heiress/fashion designer Se-ri accidentally winds up in a North Korean village, and really REALLY wants to go home. Mostly because there are no scented candles or spa-like bathtubs in the vicinity, but also because she could easily disappear into a NK jail and never return. A North Korean captain named Ri Jeong Hyeok finds her and decides not to turn her because, one, he’s a good guy who doesn’t want to turn an innocent person over to what might be her death, and two, turning her over might get his four underlings in trouble for reasons. Said underlings are his family, basically, and they are a deLIGHT. One is an argumentative proud sort who likes to drink and to feel important and who tries to provoke (and gets provoked by) Se-ri at every opportunity, one is a lover of banned South Korean dramas, one is a 17 year old bby who misses his mom, and one is the silent but most loyal follower of the captain. 

Besides all these people, there are two other characters (including a surprisingly wise conman) who become faves and major players in the plot.

There is a great mix of humor, romance, found family, and angst, and I love it very much. A few things don’t go the way I want them to near the end, but a bit of imagination and fanfic can fix anything 

ALSO I FORGOT THE CAPTAIN GETS SUPER SULKY FROM TIME TO TIME AND IT IS HILARIOUS

Show of hands, who thinks they will meet again

4. Are You Human Too: A FAVORITE SHOW OF ALL! TIME!

What do you do when your husband dies and your evil mega-rich father-in-law takes your son away from you and keeps you from seeing him ever? Well, if you are scientist with more genius than positive coping methods, you build yourself a robot son who looks exactly like your real son. Great solution, am I right?

Nam Shin III is the name of my favorite robot son, played by the inestimable Seo Kang Joon. He is the purest bby you will ever meet, being designed so that he never lies and so that he will immediately go to hug anyone who cries. He seems quite a contrast to the bitter human Nam Shin, who hates his gilded prison life, hates his Grandpa, and tries to sneak away from his right hand man, Secretary Ji Young Hoon, his only friend in the world. The girl in the show is Kang So Bong, an ex-UFC fighter who was so badly injured she had to quit. She is at first a bit jaded and mercenary because of her past, but she has a golden heart that just needs to be reminded of its existence.

Not going into details to avoid spoilers, but everything upends when the robot Nam Shin has to take the place of the human Nam Shin. The show is a soft, funny, angsty exploration of what it means to be human, with some good found family throughout. The character development is phenomenal, and the connection between So Bong and Nam Shin III is *chef’s kiss*. I just want to give a shout out to Seo Kang Joon who plays a duel role like you wouldn’t believe, to SKJ’s smile, to the soundtrack, and to the character of Young Hoon, a loyal, steady, and self-sacrificing secretary that we do not deserve  (gosh tho he looks good in blue!)

Look at my robot son getting a long-looked for affirmation! (his lil smile!!!

5. W: Two Worlds: 

This show unique because it  meta as HELL! Oh Yeon Joo is a junior doctor and the daughter of a webtoon artist whose big hit, W, is coming to a close. Much to her surprise, she gets pulled into the world of the comic where she encounters and saves the main character, Kang Chul, a former Olympic shooting champion who was blamed for the murder of his entire family, and whose sole desire is to find the real killer. It’s a good romance between them, and I also love Kang Chul’s relationship with his hyung, which, tho it is not always a main focus, is present and wonderful. Kang Chul himself is both intelligent and adorably bratty, charismatic and angsty, soft and fierce, and he is one of my favorite kdrama characters for sure.

As for the meta, the show does a fantastic job exploring the rules of the comic world, of how one can enter and leave, the importance and power of main characters and supporting characters, and the purpose of an author. There is always another twist coming, and it is just so much fun!

UM SIR PLS POINT THAT ELSEWHERE

6. Healer: 

I watched half this show and never realized that the female lead is played by Park Min Young, same actress as in Her Private Life. Someone had to tell me lol! She’s just so good at playing different people. In this show, she is Chae Young Shin, a reporter for a celebrity tabloid who has big dreams of becoming a famous reporter who investigates stories that actually mean something. She is a bit quirky, very cute, very brave, and probably one of my favorite female leads. She lives with her dad above his coffee/teashop bakery and is friends with all the ex-cons he has defended while doing his other job of lawyering.

Anyway this show is more of a romantic/action drama. To get an idea of the titular Healer, picture what you would get if you took some of Batman and Nightwing’s aesthetics (wearing black, hanging out on rooftops, punching people, flipping around, etc) and put them into a night courier who likes to watch National Geographic and dream about one day going off to an island where he can live all by himself for the rest of his days because oh yeah he is a loner whose only friend is an older woman who sets up his jobs and whom he has never actually met.

There is also an older reporter that Young Shin looks up to, the fun tabloid office where she works, a heck lot of mystery surrounding some tragedy involving a group of reporter best friends/found family back in the 80’s/90’s, and of course both members of the OTP have childhood trauma that has made them who they are today. One of my favorite things that happens in the show is that Healer has to go undercover for a while, Clark Kenting it up in Young Shin’s tabloid office, which overnight becomes a real news agency for reasons.

The action is LOTS of fun, and the romance is really soft and cute, and better still, when there is a misunderstanding or something that gets in their way, they almost immediately talk about it and resolve issues. They TRUST each other and give the benefit of the doubt where many tv couples would break up or get in big fights. I find it (plus the character development) very refreshing.

I couldn’t find a gif of my favorite fight sadly. This will have to do

7. Lawless Lawyer: This has Lee Joon Gi. Watch it.

Just kidding, there are many other reasons to watch the show, but it is true that Lee Joon Gi is one of my favorite actors. The man has phoenix eyes, a jawline that could cut silk, diamonds, you name it, and such a deep well of emotional acting that it literally kills me when his characters rage/weep/love/etc.

Anyway, in this legal thriller/romance/action drama, LJG’s character Bong Sang Pil is a beautiful, very extra ex-gangster/now lawyer who opens his own office, ready to fight villainy and avenge his mom with the law or with his fists, whichever is more useful at the time. He has a right hand man named Manager Tae and recruits a bunch of thugs as his minions, and they all become a weird sort of family as the show goes on.

Ha Jae Yi is a quiet badass lawyer who has no time for sexist idiots and gets her license suspended for smacking one of said fools. She gets recruited to assist Sang Pil, and they find their goals align as both their mothers were destroyed by the villains.

Speaking of the villains? EXCELLENT acting by them all, like they need to go down obviously, but you can’t help but be in awe of a few of them or even get attached to one or two in a weird way. Props to the show for having one of the best female villains I have ever seen

What an icon

Here you get two gifs of him

Sorry I needed to make it a magical three lol

~~

Tune in next time for historical dramas and modern dramas that are a bit darker!

Calling All K-Pop Survival Show Trash (I-Land Edition)

What’s good everyone

In the past I have talked about my interest in  kpop survival shows and my preferred lineups for shows like Produce 101 X and Youth with You.  These such posts got some attention and made me befriend some cool mutuals so I thought why not do more for any other shows I come across so I can also discuss with people and fangirl with them? Though I myself continue to like these shows despite evil editing and clear favoritism from producers/global fans, I still wish to share with you some hardworking trainees that I think you guys would be interested in, especially if ya’ll kpop survival show tl’s are dry and looking to fill the void with something different.  Well, I-Land happens to be that different show.  Now I know not everyone is a big fan of BigHit or even Mnet for that matter, I do encourage this show because it is a lot different from the format of the Produce series, or any past kpop survival show for that matter.  The standard for ranking trainees is not entirely up to global votes and the producers in the show give their valuable take.  Not only that but their living conditions, music choices, and selected trainees are very distinct and refreshing in my opinion.   Not only that but you have big names like Rain, Zico, Bang PD, IU, and much more contributing to the show to create the best global kpop group.

Now when posting this I realized I should have done this earlier because the show is already on its second part hehe.  I-Land is split up into two parts so I’m just gonna give a brief rundown.  The first part of I-Land involves these 23 trainees that all arrive individually or within groups to do this isolated and intricate building in the woods.  These trainees then go through a series of performances to see who is the most competent member in entering I-Land, this really swanky and high-tech living space fit with training areas, a kitchen filled with a bunch of food, very pristine and spacious dorm rooms, etc.  The catch is that only 12 members are only able to be apart of that paradise and will be determined by voting amongst themselves (already pretty political off the bat lol).  Those who are unable to attend the I-Land are sent to The Ground, basically a way more downgraded version of I-Land with much fewer resources.  This first part basically has these two groups pitted against each other and shifted between the I-Land and The Ground based on this trainee voting system and the producer voting system after completing various tests/competitions.  The only time where the global voting system mattered was towards the end of Part 1 in which the global votes determined the 6 trainees eligible from The Ground to be with the other 6 I-Landers (which have been selected to stay by the Producers).  These 12 trainees then dive into Part 2 of I-Land which is really the start of the actual competition to make it to the official 7-member debut line.  The 12 to 7 members are shaved down again based on a series of tests that will showcase their individual and teamwork skills.  This time the voting is completely based on an alternating system of producers and global fans deciding the ranking, the lowest such member being eliminated every other week.

So like I said I should have started this sooner since this show premiered back in June, but because a lot of people are just starting to know about the show because BTS and now Seventeen (Performance Unit) guested or are about to guest on the show (this includes possibly TXT and Gfriend given they are also tied to BigHit), might as well update ya’ll now on why you shouldn’t just be watching just because your ults are there for barely an entire episode.  Though I admit that there are shady moments and complaints I have with the show, there is no denying that these trainees that are picked are all really good in their respective areas and are incredibly dead set on becoming idols.  Now you may have heard people saying that this show is a “flop” based on Korean ratings.  Given I don’t know how tv ratings work in South Korea and know that this show is steered more towards global fans, a number of people I have talked to already about this show just watch on different video sharing websites or apps the next day so subtitles appear or they watch during the scheduled time of the live broadcasting on YouTube which I have to say is SOOOO pleasing for us international folks.  Ratings and famous artists contributing to the show aside, I once again stress that you guys should give the show a try just for the sake of getting to know these kids because I feel like with time and practice, even if they don’t make the final lineup, they will achieve their dreams eventually.

Now as much as I want to talk about the entirety of the show, I will once again post my top 7 members down below in the (Keep Reading) section.  If ya’ll don’t want spoilers and wish to look up the show first then by all means go ahead!  If you guys are curious about the show or even want to scream and talk about the show if you are caught up, please message me ya cuties!

NOW WITHOUT FURTHER ADO THESE ARE MY TOP 7 I-LAND TRAINEES (SPOILERS POTENTIALLY INCLUDED):

1) Lee Heeseung

No question about it Heeseung is one of my biases on this show and for a good reason.  This boy, a former BigHit trainee, is considered the ace of the show, an all-rounder who so far has shown stability in both dance and vocals (have yet to see rap being portrayed a lot in this show, but the producers, specifically Bang and Pdogg have said he really excels in rap and it was strange to them because he entered the show to focus more on vocals lol).  Not only that but he is selfless, a trainee that has been putting a lot of his fellow members first and sacrificing his own time to help them or steer them in the right direction.  Bro is also dorky and a total crackhead behind the scenes of I-Land lol.  As of part 2 I believe he is the trainee with the most seniority, as in years of training.  Despite showing his playful side here and there, he seems to be the most well-spoken and mature of the trainees, putting him as a major candidate to become a leader.  It is just a bonus that he looks this good too!  At this point in the show, it would be insane for anybody to not include Heeseung in their final debut lineup predictions.  Plus this is legit Bang PD’s favorite son ya’ll already know.

2) Park Sunghoon

Ah the little ice prince! Another former BigHit trainee (and my second bias lol),  Sunghoon is incredibly charismatic and knows how to show the right facial expressions on stage.  I honestly kind of see him as a dark horse in the show.  His vocals are pretty decent and he can really keep up in dancing.  Overall just so hardworking, and it definitely shows because he really has been consistent through the show! It’s pretty known he is a major visual in the show but a lot of people also like him for his clean-cut and simple personality. He is also very observant of the other members and can be just as doting and selfless as Heeseung.  What irks me is that the producers and even some viewers complain that his personality “overlaps” with other members, which is honestly an odd reason to have when considering the debut lineup.  He seems quiet at first but the kid can be so hyperactive, funny, and radiates crackhead energy as time goes by in the show, giving us more of his personality to work with.  What is more fascinating is that he used to figure-skate for 10+ years and decided to choose this path as an idol after seeing BTS.  He is also determined to show his parents that they shouldn’t have doubted him and that he took the right path and I just love that.  Please look out for him because with his popularity and competence, I am sure he will make it to the lineup!

3) Yang Jungwon 

Pack it up ya’ll we found our little maknae of the group who is a cutie and an all-rounder!  He is also a dark horse to me, but then again a lot of people consider him to be a “hidden ace” in the show.  Jungwon may be one of the youngest members in I-Land but amongst the other younger trainees, but he stands out as the most skilled by a landslide.  He excels at singing and is very stable.  In fact I think he is one of the few trainees that has a really good singing voice next to Heeseung.  He is also really good at dancing as well as free-styling.  I think he is also a former BigHit trainee (I... yes I know a lot of my picks just happen to be BigHit trainees but trust me I’m not just being biased lol).  I think Jungwon is someone who, though he excels himself, really appreciates his hyungs who he respects and wishes to learn from.  Coincidentally, his role model is Jungkook haha.  His ability to adjust to concepts, even the most mature ones, is also very astonishing.  Hoping that global fans not only see him as a cute kid but as a talented, caring, and hardworking soul.  Baby did not quit taekwondo to follow his dreams as an idol too!

4) Jay Park

Ya’ll you see this kid?  He is a fighter.  A competitor who brings the heat.  And behold he is also formerly from BigHit lol, but also SM entertainment! Jay is incredibly skilled at dancing and is very charismatic on stage. I think he is one of the few people who showcased rap pretty decently, but again this show barely showed the rap skills of any of these trainees to really conclude that.  The kid has been through a lot of humiliating moments in the show, even coming up with the iconic and meme-worthy line to accept such moments: resentment, anger, humiliation.  He has been placed in compromising situations, but he owns up the the situation and accepts responsibilities that no one would.  He is not as intimidating as he may want to look as he also very caring and helpful (plus his fear of ghosts is adorable). Even other trainees approach him to teach them choreography or get advice.  Also the way he was able to lead the Grounders in the Fire performance made me appreciate him even more since then.  I feel like he has the potential to be a great leader for the group as well.  He is also honest in what he feels and has no problem stating that to the viewers, but is never someone who whines about not getting his way.  His stubbornness will take him all the way to the debut line in my opinion haha.  Go hard my sweet potato boy!

5) Jake Shim

Our Aussie boy and the icon of improvement in the show! He happens to be one of the trainees with the shortest training time.  Despite this, he has had potential since his entrance test with Crown.  Jake has had some rough criticism that lead him to work very hard.  In fact he always feared that he may get behind others or not keep up.  I think out of all the members--and that is saying a lot because they all really do try their best--he is the one who is the most hard-working and constantly practicing the choreography, even when others are asleep.  I also think he has a pretty good vocal range, and it definitely improved since Flicker recently.  The fact that he came all the way here to South Korea by himself to achieve his dream of being an idol after witnessing BTS is so brave. I really respect him and his friendship with a lot of the members in I-Land, especially with Sunghoon! I think he will only continue to rise up and gain more traction from the global audience.

6) Kim Sunoo

Sunshine boy coming through! Sunoo came along with Jake and performed Crown together and since then I always thought he had some real talent.  This thought was only proven later on, but really set it for me his Save Me performance.  Listen his vocals are so promising despite also having a short training period.  I honestly think it would rival Heeseung’s vocals.  I do think he has room to improve in dance, but he really works for it.  He is always so positive and nice to others.  He is very modest and eager to learn and I love how he is basically this aegyo king who never cringes at the slightest when he acts like himself.  As someone who wishes to be on tv, I hope he gets there.  I feel like a lot of people have slept on him because he was mostly known as that one cute kid with adequate skills, but they are far more better than a lot of the trainees since the beginning of the show.  His popularity already puts him really up there so I can only hope he just continues to prove himself to the producers because they have already complimented him on his more masculine and skilled side in Fake Love.  Fighting my son!

7) K

Our last member is K! Now I have had my eye on K because his visuals really stand out for me, like something out of a comic or drama.  Handsomeness aside, K hails from Japan and is the oldest member on the entire show.  He is very experienced in choreographing and is undoubtedly one of the best dancers on the show, which was definitely established in the dance unit competition.  His vocals are also pretty underrated.  I think he that knows how to grab attention and make us wanting more.  Now as much as I adore his skills and ability to lead other members in the choreo, I have noticed that he is the type to be very straightforward, and it may come off as intimidating to other members.  I am not sure if this is just South Korean etiquette of respecting elders and just trying really hard not to upset them, but the way that members have had their fair share of discussing issues with how K just turns icy whenever he doesn’t see things his way or makes a mistake leading them to be frightened to the point of not being able to chime in with their thoughts is very alarming.  I get that no one wants to step on his toes further, but I hope this attitude and relationship doesn’t persist.  I like K and I can see that he dotes on other members and helps them out as much as he can, but sometimes his hypocritical and isolated attitude gets the better of him.  Now granted this may be a result of MNET’s evil editing, but seeing all these trainees share their uneasy thoughts regarding him makes me feel another way.  Even when these issues happen, it ends up with him having to talk it out with his members and reflect, which is highly appreciated.  Even the producers feel like K is important and is promising in his ad-libs and skill set.  May he recover from all these issues and keep himself together!

HONORABLE MENTION:

★ Hanbin

I thought I would add an additional member that I have been on the fence about if one of these other potential trainees do not make it, especially considering I am a bit scared of K’s placement due to global fans being easily persuaded by how MNET edits their shit.  I actually have never laid eyes on Hanbin since the entire first half of the show because he was always in The Ground.  After seeing him lose confidence their I was scared if he would ever recover.  Luckily, he opened up this time around! Not only do I see him acting more like this sweet older brother towards the other trainees, especially in times of conflict like with K and Niki, but he has really been standing out with his dance and vocal skills.  I already know he used to be part of a Vietnamese cover dance group, but I never knew how stable and clear his vocals were.  Though I don’t think he is as stand out as other members in these skills, he definitely showed more of his confidence and improvement since Part 1.  I was honestly wondering why so many people have been hyping him and I guess I was the one wrongfully sleeping on him and his hidden talents heh.  I also hope he is getting more recognition now and it would be nice to see another member who is outside of South Korea appear in the group, especially since Bang PD is going for a global group. Call me a Hannie now lol.

ALRIGHT end of this thread.  Again feel free to talk to me about the show or finally start watching the show.  Even though I did not list your favorite, understand this is my personal debut lineup.  This in no way means I am hating on any of the other members.  I think they all have what it takes if they were all able to get casted onto this show, and I hope they eventually will.   Given that I was looking for much more trainees that caught my eye, have had experience, a good personality, a natural and improved skill set, and just an overall good connection with them, these were the trainees I was most enticed by.  It is pretty set like this and I doubt it will change, but who knows.  Thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope check out the show or continue to stream it! <3

The truth about vampires

Let’s start off with some basics. What’s your name? Rachel How old are you? 35 What’s your hair and eye color? Green eyes, brown to teal hair. How tall are you? 5′6″

What’s your relationship status? Married Alright, enough of that. Let’s move on to the random shit. What’s your favorite song? Mayonaise by the Smashing Pumpkins, Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton and In Your Atmosphere by John Mayer. What does that song mean? What is the message behind it? They are all pretty different theme wise, but all three really evoke a feeling. Is it your favorite because you relate to it, or do you just like the beat? They’re all more guitar heavy than having a beat, the lyrics and overall feeling the songs provide are what really get m, though. Have any pets? If so, what are they and what’s their names? I have a dog named Finn, and a cat named Mateo. Have you ever met your idol? If so, were they nice or were they kind of an ass? I don’t have an idol. What’s your favorite method of gaming? (PC, Xbox, Playstation, etc) Either the Switch or my laptop. Xbox is fine, but I guess I prefer a handheld type device.  If you’re in college, what’s your major and why did you pick it? I am not in college. My major when I attended varied between visual communications, education and IT. I didn’t choose nor graduate. How’re you doing today? Meh, theres a lot going on around me with people I care about. I was talking to a friend earlier about how most people are stressed or unhapy this time of year, which is really not my experience. I love buying gifts for others, decorating and baking, so this is generally a good time for me. What color are your bedroom walls? Ugh, like a pastel yellow. I really dislike the color. I have painted some grey paint splotches on one wall to see which one I liked most, but I’ve never gotten around to actually painting. Describe your favorite shirt. I don’t know that I have a favorite. I typically wear a shirt I got from John Mayer’s last tour the most- its got a cool fish and cat graphic on it. Use this space to tell someone off. I’ve no one to tell off. What’s your view on smart watches? Cool or a waste of money? I have one. I like it. I really like watches in general, though and I feel a little sad I don’t wear the analog ones anymore, but I’d miss the functionality of the smartwatch. What is one poster that you have hanging on your bedroom wall of? I don’t have anything hanging on the walls in my room. We have slanted ceilings, so there isn’t even enough space for a poster. My room was covered in band posters as a teenager, though. How many times have you moved in your life? I lived at home til 20, lived with my first roommate til 25, a townhouse with a friend and my now husband for a year, an apt with my now husband for 4 years and now our house for 5 years. If you moved, do you like where you are now better than where you were? I’ve stayed in pretty much the same area, but living in our house is definitely better than the one bedroom apartment we were in. What’s your favorite color and why? Grey. Darker earthy tones. Do you have a calendar? If so, what’s the theme? Nope. Just use my watch/phone. Have any famous person’s autographs? I do on some concert tickets from when I was younger. Do you draw well? Depends on your perspective, to my non-artistic friends, they think I’m amazing. The artistic friends, probably just roll their eyes lol. What type of cell phone do you have? iPhone X. Should you be doing anything else right now or are you just bored? I finally finished the wedding I had been editing and the only other project I have right now is the paint by number of our dog I got for my husband as a gift, but he’s here, so it has to wait. Finishing that wedding was a huge weight off my shoulders.

If you’re in school/college, what’s your favorite subject and why? Not in school. Maybe now that I’m done with the wedding I’ll start exploring some learning opportunities. Are you a cat or a dog person? Why? I would’ve always said cat until I got a dog. There are a lot of things about dogs I was really not into, but I love my dog so much. Personality wise, I’m more of a cat person, but in practice I like dogs. Tell me about the plot of your favorite book. I have several. One has a ghost that rings a bell around a mounted moose’s head. Do you wear glasses or contacts? Glasses. What do you think about horror movies? I like them. I’ve seen a lot of old ones. Back in the day, my mom and I would go to Blockbuster and I’d get a different horror movie every week. If you love them (I do), what’s your favorite? Nightmare on Elm Stree is a classic for me. It Follows is probably the one that fucked me up the most. Got any cool Christmas presents picked out for family or friends yet? I’ve got all my gifts purchsed except for the hub. He sent me a ridiculous wish list that included a suit of armor and a castle and then decided he didn’t want any gifts this year. I’m running out of time to figure something out. Do you do Black Friday shopping or wait for Cyber Monday? Neither. I’m definitely not going to go out on Black Friday and deal with all those people for junk I don’t need. As for Cyber Monday, I don’t really pay much attention to any of the deals and don’t really buy more on that day than I would on any other. Have any mental illnesses? Not encompassing enough to get any kinda of diagnosis. What’s your favorite word and why? No idea.  What is the most expensive thing you own, and what is it? My car? I mean, I don’t outright own it yet. Singular item, my MacBook or iMac, I guess.  Did you buy that item yourself? Yes, I bought the macbook and iMac after I left my job at Cassano’s and needed a new laptop since my previous one was owned by the company. Where do you work and what is your position? *I am currently unemployed. How often do you cuss? A fair amount. Maybe just a little bit more than whomever I’m talking to. What type of car do you drive, if any? I have a 2012 Volvo s60. Are you happy with it? If no, what’s your dream car? I prefer to drive my car than my husbands, but I’m like 50/50 on liking it. Right now, my dream vehicles are the new Land Rover Defender or an Audi Q8. Do you have a lot of social media accounts? Which ones? I have Instagram, Facebook LinkedIn and Tumblr. I very rarely post on any of them. I use snapchat a lot, though, if that counts. What is your favorite genre of music? My Spotify year end review said I listen to Pop, Rock, Indie, Folk and Emo the most. In that order. Does your family have holiday traditions? If so, what are they? Nope. My fmaily just barely cobbles themselves together for major holidays. If you’re in a relationship, are you happy with it? Sure. People are breaking up around us, and it really makes me appreciate the relationship my husband and I have, even if it doesn’t always feel like its going as well as it is. How long have you been with your significant other? Just hit the 10 year mark. Do you like psychology? (It’s my college major). Nah. Never really been something I’m too interested in. What is something your state is popularly known for? College football I guess.  Do you like to do craft projects? If so, what’s the coolest thing you made? I do. I recently drew a bunch of Dungeons and Dragons monsters to use as ornaments on a tree in my dining room where my husband and his friends play Dungeons and Dragons on Sundays. I’ve made some painting as house warming gifts or nursery art for friends children that they’ve hung up and thats nice to see. Do you watch sports or do you think they’re overrated? Nah. Not really a fan. What’s one occupation you think gets paid too much and doesn’t deserve to? Meh, I don’t know that I want to hate on any specific occupation. The extremely rich do bother me, however, with how much money they make, often at their employees detriment. Do you straigthen your hair? Not usually. I have more lately, since its getting long again. I’m more likely to do the loose waves thing, though. Ever dyed your hair a color that isn’t natural? (blue, pink, etc) Yes, it is currently teal. How’s your relationship with your parents? Relationship with my mom is okay, none with my dad. Do you still live with them or do you have your own house? I live in my own home. What’s something you are currently saving money for to buy? Hmm, nothing. The couple of items I want at the moment, I asked for on my Christmas list. Do you smoke/vape? If so, what brand do you smoke/what device do you use? Nope, I’ve never smoked. Ever done drugs? Nope. Tell me one of your worst habits. Picking at my cuticles? What’s a weird quirk you have that no one else you know does? No idea, I kind of doubt that theres something I do that no one else ever does. If you game, what type of headset do you use? I don’t ever need a headset. What type of computer do you own, and do you like it? I have a MacBook Pro. I used to have an Air and I loved it, but my husband talked me into getting the Pro instead and I regret it.  What’s the thing that annoys you the most? When my husband asks google to make his cellphone ring at max volume without even trying to look for it. Today, it was in his pocket. What brand of TV do you have? Samsung. Are you excited for Christmas? (It’s December 1st today when I made this) Kind of? I love how cozy my house feels with all the decorations.  Tell me about your favorite vacation you’ve taken. We went to New York for my birthday/anniversary/Halloween 2 years ago. Tell me something cool about yourself. I am not cool? Did/do you get good grades in school/college? Not in my middle school/high school years. What’s your ringtone on your phone? Vibrate. What’s your favorite store to shop in? The internet. If you won the lottery, what is the first thing you would buy and why? I have no idea. I’d probably sit on the money for a long time and then once I finally broke the seal, buy a bunch of stuff. How long have you had a Bzoink account? Don’t have one. Ever been to Field of Screams? If so, what’s your favorite attraction? Nope. Do you own a Polaroid camera? I have an Instax camera. Do you have hardwood floor in your room or carpet? The two bedrooms upstairs have carpet, but the rest of the house is hardwood. It’s a Saturday night, what are you typically doing? Relaxing at home, most likely. Doing a crossword puzzle, probably. Do you have a lot of friends or do you not have any at all? I have a couple. What’s your all time favorite movie and why? I don’t know, really. I watch the Iron Man movies and Thor Ragnarok the most these days. How many blankets do you sleep with at night? A sheet and comforter. What’s the last TV show you watched? Did you enjoy it? The Mandalorian. I do enjoy it.  Do you prefer cable TV or do you use Netflix? We have cable, but never really watch it. Everything we want to watch is only Netflix or Disney+. What is your dream job and why? I have no idea. Need to get to thinking on that. Do you think you would be a good therapist? I do. I think I can listen to people and help them come to their own answers pretty well. What’s your favorite brand of clothing? I don’t know that I have a favorite. Anything that fits well and has a lot of sales lol.

Home Away From Home (Ch.3)

Catch up with Chapter 1 and Chapter 2 here 

TRR AU: Drake decided to leave the engagement tour in LA after they found Tariq, what will that mean for Drake and Emma? Will she end up with Liam?

A/N: Julian, CA is a real place lol. Look it up if you don’t believe me. Also, yes I do speak some Italian! 

Pairing: Drake x MC (Emma Barnes); Liam x MC

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1,989

Last Time: Drake was wrenched back in his memories to the first time he thought he may have feelings for Emma, and the very first time they kissed, but he got a rude awakening that same day when he accidentally caught her making out with Liam. 

Chapter 3: Make you Feel My Love 

When his thoughts finally cleared he realized he was getting low on gas and had no idea where he was, somewhere in the mountains, he had no recollection of how he got from the beach to the mountains, but now he needed to figure something out. As if it was divine intervention, he saw a sign for a town called Julian, only ten miles away. He followed the sign and he honestly almost drove right through it was so small. Turning onto a side street he found some parking and climbed out, wandering through the town. Every other shop had some kind of advertisement up about apples. He thought he was going crazy at first, it was like someone had condensed Cordonia into a tiny little town and dropped it in California. It didn't take him long to find the town hall, he meandered in and learned a lot. It had been an old mining town, that would explain the decor and style of buildings, and then it became known for all their apple orchards and famous apple pie. There was a cabin just a few miles away that had gone up for sale, Drake hadn't thought he'd find someplace so quickly, but he did. Julian was his place. Big enough that not everyone knew you, but small enough where it wasn't too crowded. Even though he was surrounded by apples, it reminded him of home, of Cordonia, and not of her. He took a few days to settle in before he really started to explore, little boutiques, cafes, souvenir shops, even some wineries in town.

Once he had settled in, he got a new phone and texted Liam.

I'm safe. That’s all he said, Liam asked him more, but Drake wouldn't share. He knew the kind of persuasion power she had, she was a temptress, he could never say no to her and she knew it. She had that same kind of hold on Liam, Drake was sure of it. He remembered the first time she gave him a nickname, that was when he knew he loved her, despite all his attempts to push her away, to not want her. She was irresistible and fierce, pushing back ten times harder than he pushed her away.

****

Drake was on his way out to find some real food when he ran into her. She was still wearing the dress from the event in Italy earlier that night. Sparkling red, a plunging neckline with small lines of fabric running down her chest, almost like trails of blood. Every step she took the dress swished by her ankles, the rest of it hugged her curves so tightly it left little to the imagination as her hips swayed. Holding his arm out to her, Drake led her through the quiet lamp-lit streets, dashing into the first open restaurant he found. The aromas of fresh tomatoes and spices filled the air of the tiny restaurant, it had a cozy kind of mom and pop feel to it as they slid into a booth. A kind, middle-aged, man offered them some menus.

“So, this is more your style huh?”

“A menu, a table, and the promise of good food. That's all I need.” The man asked them a question in Italian. Drake didn't know much Italian, any really, just a few basic words. Emma smiled at his confusion, not passing up the opportunity to tease him.

“Didn't think your plan through?” She was going to answer for them. She had taken Italian in college, not that she ever thought she'd actually use it, but she had the chance now.

“No, I've got this.” Emma decided to sit back and watch Drake who turned to the man.

“Spaghetti and pizza.”

“Drake... you forgot the lasagna.”

“You're right, my vocabulary’s too limited.”

“I'm disappointed in you.” Drake saw that familiar gleam in her eye, she was teasing him, like she loved to do.

“We'll have to make do.”

“So, do you do this often?”

“This isn't my first time going rogue. Following Liam around you often end up in foreign lands.”

“Well, now you've got me for company.” her hand twitched like she wanted to reach over and grab Drake's, but she stopped herself.

“That means more pressure to not look like a fool.”

“You could never look like a fool to me, Drake.” His eyes met her steady gaze and he knew she meant it, no jokes, he dragged his eyes away, she always got to him. Just then, the man returned with spaghetti and pizza for them. The man gave Drake a smile and turned away.

“Grazie, signor!” Emma added as he walked away, the man cracking a real smile as he nodded at Emma. Drake looked at Emma, surprised but impressed, she never ceased to amaze or surprise him.

“Oh, I think he misunderstood.” Drake looked down and saw only one bowl of spaghetti. Emma giggled and grabbed a fork diving in.

“We'll make do, Drake.” He shrugged and grabbed his own fork diving into the delicious noodles before he could get a bite, Emma snagged it off his fork. Sucking the noodles up, she left one hanging, leaning in so close to Drake he could smell her intoxicating perfume. He wanted to scoop up that noodle, bring her in for a kiss, but he had to restrain himself. He forced himself to look away and grab a slice of pizza instead.

“So why didn't you speak up earlier when I was struggling? You clearly know some Italian.” Her lips curled into a lazy smile.

“I didn't want to show you up on our first date. The male ego is a fragile thing.”

“What?” Drake almost spit his food out all over the table at the mention of the word date. Sure they'd been flirting and shared some kisses, but they weren't dating, she was still Liam's girl and that's the exact reason he hadn't kissed her just seconds ago.

“A nice meal at an Italian restaurant, you invited me to.”

“I invited you for food because I thought you were hungry. Normal people eat when they're hungry!” Drake's words came out fast and flustered, color rising to his cheeks as Emma watched, suppressing a laugh.

“I'm okay with it.” She batted her eyelashes.

“I… err… you're killing me, Barnes.” Drake sighed, wiping some pasta sauce off his face. Deciding she tortured him enough for the moment, she changed the subject.

“I noticed we didn't have to sneak past any palace security tonight. Can you just come and go as you please?”

“I'm not nearly as important as Liam, besides Bastien trusts me. Knows I can take care of myself, we go way back.”

“Ooh, storytime!” Drake suppressed a smile.

“I don't know what's gotten into me tonight. I guess I'm just in a sharing mood.”

“Maybe it's the company.”

“I want to give you a hard time, Barnes, but the truth is I'm just so damned happy to be spending time alone with you, away from that circus.” So, he opened up about Bastien, his father, his childhood when Bastien would babysit him and Savannah. Drake went on to tell her about how he idolized his dad, how he went away for college until the assassination attempt on Liam's family. Drake twisted his fork idly in the pasta, lost in thought, Emma reached over and grabbed his hand, squeezing.

“You're a good friend to Liam.” Drake smiled half-heartedly as his eyes shot up to hers, his gaze swept over her face hungrily.

“... Most of the time…” his gaze landed on her lips and stayed there until she leaned in to kiss him. She pressed herself against him, kissing him sweetly, catching him off guard. His body tensed at first before melting into her touch.

“Barnes…” he pulled away, Emma gently rested her palm against his cheek before sliding to the back of his neck, tangling her fingers in his hair, pulling him closer for a deeper and more passionate kiss. Her tongue teased his bottom lip and he couldn't resist even if he wanted to, their tongues dancing together before she finally pulled away breathless.

“You're full of surprises tonight.” He rested his forehead against hers, a hand idly resting on her waist, the other he had to untangle from her blonde curls. Emma chuckled.

“You can't just take me to dinner, pour your fluffy marshmallow heart out, and not expect me to fall a little more for you, Drake Walker.” That was it. That was the exact moment he knew he was done for, that he knew he loved her and there would never be any going back. Drake sighed, reaching out to cup her cheek, his lips brushing hers ever so lightly once again until they heard footsteps. The man from before had brought their check, Drake snatched it up before Emma could even look at it.

“Let me get it.”

“So, this was a date?” She teased but stopped when she saw the look on his face.

“It's the least I can do for talking your ear off all night, dropping all that on you.”

“It doesn't bother me, Drake, I like seeing this softer side of you.” She whispered.

“This is my lowest low. What have you done to me, Barnes?”

“I like your gooey center, Drake. I can tell you're secretly a big marshmallow at heart.”

“Thanks, Barnes.” He cleared his throat awkwardly. Moments ago, he had thought he was in love with her, that it couldn't get any worse than that, then she called him a marshmallow, gave him a nickname and he didn't mind. In fact, he secretly loved it, knowing that she saw right through him. He knew he couldn’t keep this up though, Liam was still committed to being with her once they found Tariq, some small part of Drake held out hope it would never happen and she’d pick him, but he also knew Liam would stop at nothing.

They strolled back slowly, enjoying the warm evening air, stopping on the famous Ponte Vecchio to gaze out at the Arno river below them. Emma sighed and turned back around to lean against the wall when someone walking by caught her eye.

“We should ask them to take our picture, Drake!”

“No, Barnes! We can’t!” He protested but she had already dashed off to stop them.

“Scusi. Potresti fare la nostra foto, il mio ragazzo è arrivato molto lontano per sorprendermi.” She said, he had no idea what it meant, but she returned smiling brightly.

“What did you tell them, Barnes?”

“I said it’s our first date and we want a picture to celebrate.” He rolled his eyes playfully, not knowing she’d actually told them her boyfriend came very far to surprise her. She’d loved how easily boyfriend rolled off her tongue when referring to Drake. He pulled her close from her side, trying to hide his face in her neck, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smile as he turned away, Emma laughing at his stubbornness. The man handed Emma her phone back and admired the picture. He’d caught Drake’s smile as he turned away, and Emma throwing her head back laughing at him.

“Grazie, buona notte.” As she looked, she couldn’t help but feel conflicted, shoving her phone away hastily. She knew she’d fallen in love, but with who was the big question. The commoner who tried to hide his affection for her from the world, or the king who would’ve been beaming proudly beside her, telling the world how lucky he was. She didn’t want to be just another secret, but she wasn’t a trophy to be paraded around either and she knew her time to decide was shrinking every day.

Meanwhile, Drake couldn’t help but think this woman would be his downfall he thought at that moment, he had no idea just how right he was.

  Drake Tag: @notoriouscs @speedyoperarascalparty @andy-loves-corgis @furiousherringoperatortoad @sue9659 @smritysriv @mrsdrakewalkerblog @carabeth @jovialyouthmusic @mrswalkernazario @moonlightgem7 @nikkis1983 @drakesroyalromance @gibbles82 @simsvetements @feartheendlesssummer @drakewalkerisreal @thequeenofcronuts

Perma Tag: @brightpinkpeppercorn @sleepwalkingelite @ooo-barff-ooo @endlessly-searching-for-you @agent-bossypants @roonarific @likethetailofacomet @zaffrenotes @mysteli @vickypoochoices @kayann93 @jlouise88 @zigortega4life @findingdrake @bbaba-yagaa

Parisa Marcon

(Here She Is… Troll Paris Hilton…)

I would die for troll Paris Hilton.

Universe: Beforus!

Name: Parisa Marcon

“Parisa” is just me messing with “Paris” because I’m really trying to nail this “Socialite celebrity” parallel. “Richie” is technically a valid troll name but… that’s in Poor Taste. “Marcon” comes from Guglielmo Marconi, the first person to use radio waves for communication! (Albeit experimentally)

Parisa’s also teeechnically a Persian given name, but that’s never stopped Homestuck before. It also means “Fairy-like” which fits the socialite aesthetic well. 

Age: Roughly 7 Sweeps

Theme/Story: Parisa has more followers on Trollstagram than you will ever have. She has teal blooded reporters donning dive suits to try and get a glimpse of her in her hive for the tabloids. She has it all: Money, Power, Fame, Legions of Adoring Fans. And yet, only a few people really know the real Parisa who comes out when she’s in her hive. That’s exactly how she wants it.

I love this character concept so much.

Strife Specibus: Knucklekind

Parisa might be beautiful, but delicate she is not. She’s a well known quantity on the “people you don’t wanna start a fight with” list. More than one Beforan boutique has been ransacked by an angry violet blood and her desire for the latest style of shoes.

I love her and her violent streak. Mind is a lot about body & mind, action over feeling, so her being someone who speaks with her fists is beautiful. Though I DO think she could utilize shoekind too, as an alternate option. Just grab a shoe off the shelf and go ham. 

Fetch Modus: Intonation

Parisa’s relatively simple modus is as such. It has two dials that tune the pitch wave of an object, which shows up on her interface. She’s gotta make the sample wave as close as possible or else the item will end up damaged. Parisa’s been known to spend HOURS trying to get something out in mint condition.

I love her…….. I love this like, neurotic tendency. Cares so much about those radio waves.

Blood color: Violet

Parisa’s certainly an eccentric. Whether she’s a Genius or Maniac depends on who you ask. She oscillates between being larger than life, incredibly aggressive and a reclusive hermit depending on how the tides go out. If she was more people oriented and in a system that was overall more overtly awful to people, she might have a bit more sympathy and desire to actively help out, but for the moment she considers her social media profiles enough of a gift to the masses to tide her over.

Symbol and meaning: Well-

AQUAZA, THE POLITIC

Trolltag: [AA] aestheticAbusion

“Aesthetic” is well, aesthetic. The overall look of something, often used to refer to a surface kind of interpretation when it comes to social media.“Abusion” literally means “Abuse of the truth”, as in “Deception”. And what is a false persona created to fool the masses into thinking you’re more image focused than you are if not that? She abuses the truth for the aesthetic. She did it for the vine.

I know I just keep complimenting everything, but godd this is so good. Her Facades. 

Quirk: W// Likeeeeeeeeeeeeee, Parisa loves to hold you the word likeeeeeeeee because it lets her think about what she’s gonna say? With a bit of uptalk? And, like, bracketed by her symbol? //W

I love the idea of a mind character who uses the like quirk, since it’s so often portrayed as like a vapid and stupid thing when it really shouldn’t be. 

Special Abilities (if any): As a seadweller, Parisa has all the requisite “I live in the ocean” powers, which culminate in a completely amphibious biology, unlike many trolls. She uses this to escape the paparazzi when they get too pushy for their own good.

Lusus: Parisa’s long suffering Lusus is a giant pufferfish that has been trying to get her not, like, pick fights right outside her hive for years now. She’s only just starting to learn her lesson now. But, now the Troll Paparazzi know where she lives, which is horrible. But they can’t really swim to the bottom of the ocean, which is nice.

I love the idea of Parisa’s lusus functioning a little bit like one of those big proximity mines. Get too close to Parisa and she’ll bounce you away. Bodyguard Balloonfish. 

Interests: Social Media, Being Rich and Amazing, The Latest Shade of Violet Foundation, Waterproof Mascara, Brand Recognition, Antique Radio Repair, Astronomy and Telescope Specs, Opera,

V….violet foundation? This is a minor critique but reading that alarmed me. Ma’am, don’t cover your whole face in violet. LOL. But these are all good. Maybe on the note of brand recognition you could have her like merch design? Like, runs an online store where people can buy images of Her, the Perfect Idol. But that’s so exhaustiiiing so she doesn’t manage it herself in her downtime.

Maybe you could have her be interested in amateur radio? Like, her running a radio show on the side where she gets to talk about stuff as her Genuine Self while not revealing that it’s Her, Famous Star Parisa Marcon. Let her ramble about the stars and wiring and all the fun fiddly things she’s into. 

Appearance: Parisa wears her hair long and wavy, in a way that flows just the right way both completely submerged and in dry air. Nobody knows what she puts in it. Nobody but herself, of course, and that’s a secret she’s taking to her grave. She does like to wear what’s IN, but she’s also SOCIAL MEDIA INFLUENCER, and she’s trying to bring back this… retro chic look? Like, dresses with jeans underneath and converse were SO IN when she was a wriggler, why did they go out of style? So all her posts the past few months have been her trying to make it happen!

Oh god this is going to be terrible and fun.

Personality: Parisa is a shrewd, calculating businesswoman. She just doesn’t make the best decisions with all the information she’s gathered. The person she pretends to be isn’t really her- while she does love being shallow and frivolous and really can’t keep a lid on her anger when someone gets in her face- it’s a pretense, a decoy. While the public’s attention is on that girl who looks like her, the real her is busy getting what she really wants: some peace and damn quiet. She’ll look into her specially calibrated telescopes at the stars above and she sees a multitude of worlds just out there, waiting to be conquered. Waiting for someone like her, someone who knows exactly how to use her public image to her best benefit.

Parisa can be obsessive and single-minded, which drives her closest friends nuts. When a problem presents itself to her, she has to think of all possible ways to solve it, even if the most obvious solution is staring her right in the face. It’s not about the problem at all, it’s about the process, it’s about principle! She’ll take a hundred selfies adjusting minor levels of light, her expression, and the objects in the room around her until it resembles exactly what she’s looking for. She won’t do anything with the other ones. The pursuit of the correct solution is all that matters. She just doesn’t know what it is until she’s tried absolutely EVERYTHING.  

I love this so much hjbjbh the just like, level of desire for that little nuanced control echoing both in herself and her efforts to manipulate mass media. 

Title: Thief of Mind

Active Classes That Remain: Maid, Thief,

Passive Classes That Remain: Sylph

Parisa is an odd kind of Mind player. Mind players tend to be overtly brainy, or at least openly logic oriented. Parisa doesn’t appear to be one at first glance- she seems to go on pure emotion. She gets into fistfights over shoes for godsakes! But that kind of emotional flow is created and guided by an irrigation system of ruthless logic. She acts this way because that’s what the camera wants, it’s what the public wants to see and read in their magazines. She’s got a new girl to date every other week because the DRAMA of it all is exactly what they want to see. Who she is does not matter, all that matters is the image.

As a bonafide celebrity with the ability to basically do whatever she wants, Parisa acts as a Thief of Mind by stealing the public’s ability to reason through her many social media angles. She’s a classic force of personality- and that’s how she likes it. She takes their thoughts and views and makes them her own, and then uses those to create a simulacrum to better hide behind.

Thief inverts to Page of Heart, and Parisa certainly struggles with emotions all around her. As a celebrity, she’s passive exploiting the public’s love and adoration of her and her exploits to her own benefit. Given her choice of company, it’s no wonder she’s struggling to contain her more destructive emotions- Breath and Rage are quite the combination.

Thief of Mind is great for her. I’ve said it before, when we chatted about this character prior, but just the… actively stealing away people’s rationality and leaving behind only raw emotions to be exploited is such a Clever Celebrity thing. 

Land: The Land of Idols and Censors

Parisa lands on a cyberpunk hellscape. Consorts huddle in churches dedicated to their favorite celebrities and artists, desperate for even a shred of recognition from these borderline gods. She sees an uncomfortable amount of herself in them, and she hates every second of seeing their too perfect faces, hearing their too perfect voices, and watching them perform every ineffable action. Are they even people?!

Any act of dissent against them is handled swiftly and violently. The Censors, agents of the Denizen, who created the Idols remove anyone who dares do anything but worship at the altars of popularity. Any information, any innovation is squashed immediately. This is a world of technological and ideological stagnation.

Parisa never thought she’d become an anti-hero, but when in Hellscape, you do as the Hellscape requires.

Good as always.

Dream Planet: Derse

Parisa is concerned with very few things: keeping her fanbase, keeping her power base, her best selfie angles, and keeping her real cards as close to her chest as possible. She struggles with letting people into her guarded psyche because she doesn’t want anyone there. She doesn’t want romance, she doesn’t really want friends, and she certainly doesn’t wanna have to rely on anyone to get what she wants.

Design: 

Horns/hair: I wanted to keep her horns relatively simple. I wanted them to be close-ish-kindof to Peixes horns, mostly because of the headcanon that those are the beauty standard. Hers are a little off, but just enough to be unique and beautiful. And her hair is a nice swoopy look, of course. 

Face: I edited both the eyes and mouth from fan-troll’s spritesheet, complete with violet makeup. 

Dress/belt: When I was looking p early 2000s fashion, no sleeve dresses over jeans were really popular, so here’s a no-sleeve black dress with a gold belt. 

Pants/shoes: The pants are edited from Karkat’s, and they’ve got a rip because that was also a common feature of early 2000s fashion. And, of course, there’s some really simple converse. 

I Love Her!

-CD

11 Questions Game

Holy Hannah! I spent my holiday weekend at the symphony (Final Fantasy: Distant Lands - SO GOOD!), playing on the lake for the first boat trip of the season, and paintballing my little heart out and generally hanging out with my irlbgf - and yet while I was away, I was tagged by some of my favourite, absolutely amazing wonderful lovely fellow Buggies in the fun 

I promise I wasn’t ignoring you! I love you all and I would like to answer all five of you - so that's 55 questions instead of just 11. That means that I DEFINITELY have to put it under a cut because it will eat up your dashboard and maybe some of you aren't all that interested in my answers. lol. 

BUT if you're interested at all in my answers and who I am, I hope you'll click. :)

From the awesome and ever talented and wonderful @believe-that-you-can-my-friend  💙💛

1. What’s your favourite piece of clothing you own?  

I have a pair of black velour pajama pants. It is my most favourite things in the world. They feel like velvet.

2. What fictional place would you most like to go?

The Starship Enterprise. The Future and the Federation seems like a pretty groovy society to live in.

3. What’s the best way to start the day?

With overnight updates to all your favourite Bughead fics that you MUST read and review before getting into the shower.

4. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

I'm not into Fifty Shades of Gray. I mean - I have no problem with BDSM - I simply have a problem with bad writing.

5. What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years?

My kids are growing up! Within the next ten years all three of my kids will be gone/leaving for college. I'll be an empty nester with my super dreamy hubby.

6. What city would you most like to live in?

I love where I live - Calgary is the best - but other than just saying "here" - I guess I'd choose London.

7. What movie title best describes your life?

It's a Wonderful Life.

8. What irrational fear do you have?

Clowns. I hate them. My husband tells me that it's an irrational fear all the time - but it doesn't FEEL irrational.

9. In your group of friends, what role do you play?

I'm generally the centre of attention. In real life, I want people to be comfortable and as engaged as I am - so I talk a lot and ask lots of questions so that they'll feel more comfortable sharing as well. People like me - oftentimes more than I like them. In fandom life I'm kinda like that too - but I like to play the roll of the cheerleader and support and over excited and passionate fangirl. In general, I like being /nice/ and I get something out of people loving me as much as I adore them. 

10. What are you most insecure about?

Um... the same physical insecurities that most people have. I guess that I'll be so over-the-top that people will think I'm fake or that I'm silly.

11. What are you most likely to become famous for?

I'm technically writing a novel... that will probably never be published. But I guess that's the only ever way I'd be famous.

From the freaking fabulous @gellbellshead 💙💛

1. What is your favourite food?

Potatoes. Whether it's mashed, soup, fries (poutine!), or whatever. I love potatoes of all sorts. YUM.

2. What is your favourite movie genre and your favourite movie from that genre?

Um. I like lots of different kinds of films but I guess I like Sci Fi the most. My favourite Sci Fi is probably Serenity. But I actually have a list of five favourite ALL TIME movies of various genres: Stardust, Schindler's List, Serenity, EuroTrip, and French Kiss.

3. Favourite Disney movie.

Meet the Robinsons or Brave.

4. Do you prefer to read fluff or angst?

I like there to be a HEA - so if there has to be angst - as long as I get a happy ending I'm cool. I like to call that Flangst. I really like plot driven fics - but I also love fluffy one-shots... I'm fairly easy. Just don't split up my OTP please.

5. Any siblings?

I'm the youngest of five - my brother is the oldest, and then three sisters, then me.

6. Your favourite fictional character?

Elizabeth Bennet

7. Your favourite person in real life?

My sweetheart, Jay. He's my person.

8. Your top 5 songs of all time?

Bizarre Love Triangle - Stabbing Westward (a New Order Cover) Moonlight Serenade - Glenn Miller Monkey Tree - Mother Mother Sleep Alone - Two Door Cinema Club Sleepwalk - Santo and Johnny

9. What it the biggest risk you have ever taken?

Um. I'm not really a risk taker.

10. What is your biggest pet peeve?

I "seen" it. Irregardles. Supposably.  (I really hate bad grammar)

11. How would your friends describe you?

Loud and fun. Kinda silly.

From the ever lovely, @wordsonpages1​  💙💛

1. Favourite colour?

Mossy green

2. Favourite book?

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. Random Passage by Bernice Morgan. The Dovekeepers by Alice Hoffman

3. What is your mantra or life motto?

As a family, we have a motto "Salmons don't do Shortcuts" - but personally I have two additional mantras. I have a scripture that is very important to me Mark 5:36 "Be not afraid, only believe." and a song with lyrics that I call my mantra: The song is called Chances by Kirby Heyborne and the line in particular is, "I am hope. I believe. I am alive. I am every thing. I have come to take these chances. I wonder when things will go my way. I was born to live my life and no one tells me who I am."

4. The number one thing that draws you to a person?

I'm shallow. Smile - shoulders - smell.

5. Who is your idol or inspiration?

Queen Elizabeth II Hannah Senesh My grandpa.

6. Places you would like to travel to?

All over Europe.

7. A perfect day would entail?

Sleeping late. Hours reading in the bathtub with no interruptions.

8. Dream job?

Can they pay me to read Bughead fanfiction all day?

9. Ultimate life goal?

To retire and travel with my sweetie and raising well adjusted and cool kids.

10. What do you like/ love most about yourself?

I love that I'm fun and passionate about stuff.

11. Sunrise or Sunset?

Sunset for sure. Mornings suck.

From my girl @jugandbettsdetectiveagency​ - 💙💛

1. Describe your aesthetic?

Jughead Jones shaking the soap? (does that count?)

2. Favourite place you’ve ever visited?

Visited is an interesting word. My favourite PLACE is the riverbottom at the bottom of the Coulee in Lethbridge. It's home. I love it.

3. If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life what would it be?

Nanaimo Bars.

4. Biggest regret?

After my BA I should have gone to Grad school. Or I should have become a Dental Hygenist or something - but I got a History Degree because I love History. I don't work in that field at all so even though I spent $50,000 to become an official Historian... I could have become something else, that would have probably made me a lot happier than what I'm doing and remained an amateur Historian.

5. You’ve been put in the middle of a fantasy battle, what is your weapon of choice?

Double edged lightsaber.

6. Favourite outfit?

Not counting my favourite pajama pants... I have this super cute red and gold paisley handkerchief shirt I bought in Mexico. I love it.

7. Have you ever been in love?

Twice. I was lucky enough to find my sweetheart when I was 19 years old. The love I felt for the bloke before Jay was minuscule in comparison to what I feel for my husband - but it was still love.

8. Favourite thing, fan fiction or not, you’ve ever read?

I can’t answer that. I read too many delicious things.

9. Main thing you look for in a person?

Sardonic sense of humour.

10. What is your earliest memory?

I remember my fourth birthday party really clearly. 

11. You’re stranded on a desert island, what one item (that isn’t a boat) would you want with you?

Can I have two? A hammock and a book?

And lastly - from the wonderful @peacelovebughead   💙💛

1. What’s your go-to pump up song?

Well lately it’s been Believer by Imagine Dragons - but normally it’d be something from Two Door Cinema Club or like Take on Me by A-Ha or something. lol.

2. If you could travel absolutely anywhere, where would you go?

Auschwitz.

3. What Hogwarts house do you belong to?

Hufflepuff

4. Thunder or Lightning?

Lightning

5. When do you feel most confident?

When I’m doing something I’m good at and people around me KNOW I’m good at it.

6. What is one of your favourite memories?

I don’t know if I have ‘favourite’ memories. Yesterday at the lake with my husband and my kids (who are teenagers and fight a lot!) - I got to hear them happily laughing and joking and having a wonderful time. That’s today’s favourite memory.

7. Who is a fictional character that you relate to? Why?

Dude. Kevin Keller is a gay, male version of me. And my brother and husband are cops so I relate to that part of him too. lol.

8. If you could wake up famous tomorrow, would you do it?

If I could keep my happy family and my morals - then sure.

9. What is one of your proudest accomplishments?

How about that $50,000 piece of paper I have hanging on my office wall that announces to the world that I’m officially allowed to have an opinion on British History along with the roots and causes of Totalitarianism. Getting that was pretty great.

10. If you were to live in a fictional world, which world would you choose?

Asked earlier - but I’d say the Star Trek universe would be the place to be.

11. If you were to pick a colour palette to describe you, what colours would you choose?

Jewel tones. 

Im crying in the school bathroom rn I seriously love wonho so much I'm in pain why is he my ideal guy in every way he's so amazing and handsome and sweet but whO CARES BEVause he don't kno me haha am I right

big mood all the time im always in pain bc he rly................ doesn’t KNOW i would let him shave off my eyebrows if he wanted 2

tardy replies as usual under the cut!

(sorted from oldest to newest)

I wouldn't even care if wonho was a high maintenance boyf tbh I'd just sit and comb his hair all day and tell him he's pretty

hdjkfh this was so long ago but i think i was mostly kidding abt him being a high maintenance bf... like he would do so much giving? but i guess the only thing he’d need is constant reassurance that his s/o loves him imo jfdhgjk... i also think he’d b someone who either doesn’t settle down ever or does it very late in his life!

annie 🌹literary queen ❤️ literally crowned with a laurel wreath! not be drum attic but this midsummer nights monsta au is so!!!! give me sistar as the four star crossed lovers then drag me to h*ll and give me this doctor faustus au i'm itching for with kihyun as faustus and k.will as mephistopheles bc i love to watch my faves s*ffer but don't let me rip until i get my much ado about nothing au with the entire cast of starship ent and a lil cameo from giriboy!

(in refence to this monsta x as shakespearean archetypes ask!) fjdshgkjs shh i lov u... why is k will as mephistopheles so Accurate esp no.mercy k will lmao. um u should write all of these? in fact if... if anyone has mx literary aus.... hmu...... i’ll n*t

another thing about that incident is that it seems like the fan doesn't think Changkyun and Jooheon undersood them?? (an extension i guess they assumed they don't understand english very well) and that's pretty problematic. it seems to me that when they didn't respond the fan assumed they didn't understand and kept repeating it, as a joke. but they literally did That to the two with the most proficient english in the group... it's rly a mess all around. it's disrespectful through and through

(in relation to that gross “d*ddy” incident from a while ago) ik i feel like some intl fans think korea is a land completely culturally and linguistically alienated/divorced from the rest of the world or something and while cultural relativism is real to some extent... the idea that koreans are completely unaware of ~outside~ things is deeply racist. like mostly white ppl think that diasphoric poc are completely Different from them? when my mum went to the states 15 years ago some ppl literally asked her if there were newspapers in china lol...

i just randomly thought of monsta x as sesame street characters mostly bc i wanna see kihyun and wonho duke it out as bert and ernie (kihyun w/ the waste paper bin on his head and wonho asking 'where's the waste paper bin' and kihyun saying 'ask me that again and look into my eyes') and also minhyuk being elmo tbh...

JKGHKJDF PLEASe!!!! when will something like this b photoshopped... minhyuk as elmo is... spot on... i remember once elmo appeared on a now-discontinued late night talk show program i used to watch when i was in primary school and he was like “elmo likes wasabi, that’s why elmo has no eyebrows” and idk why ive never been able to forget this????? very lmh. also this made me think of a monsta x muppets au n minhyuk is the pic of ass-gape kermit.... next post of mine will b monsta x as kermit reaction pics

Hyungkyun is such an under appreciated ship. Like, they just get each other so well? Why do people overlook it. ㅠ.ㅠ Do you have a moment that made you ship them? How would you describe their dynamic?

it’s bc they’re intp x intj they don’t rly... Understand each other with minimal effort/real communication lmao it’s very efficient. both quiet lil darlings who aren’t emotionally That Open but enjoy their own little space together sometimes?? their dynamic is like... they’re weird in different ways but they’re v chill together. u can tell hyungwon is super fond of changkyun like he has this Expression when ck does anything at all.... i think these two rly love each other’s personalities bc they’re both kind/gentle/peaceful types and their overall ?? vibe is just highly compatible... they’re absolute darlings... v soft together... i can’t think of a favourite moment but i rly rly love their birthday messages for each other last year like changkyun’s message for hyungwon was like “ur rly cool bruh ur rly such a great person” and hyungwon’s message for changkyun was rly... just him obviously doting on him n finding him cute jksfdhg i lov them a lot :(

soyou: i know how to make hair pretty :))) knetz: dirty fckn iljin why can't she be out there being being PRODUCTIVE in society by having babies and learning how to be a good wife for her future husband ://// smh how dare she be successful now when i'm stuck doing what society wants me to do but also anonymously attacking ppl i don't personally know on the internet bc THATS respectable the irony of ugly knetz is so transparent

The whole thing about Knetz and wonho's "scandalous" past reminded me of something. As a PSA to those people who are so insistent and pushy that idols aren't allowed to have sex/date/be anything but straight: Fuck all of you. You do not own these people, and if you really cared about them you'd be happy if they were happy. Like tbh, if anyone that famous and busy could also balance out a relationship at the same time, I'd be so happy for them. It really bugs me how all idols are supposed (1/2)(2/2) have this squeaky clean innocent image where they have to look and act a certain way and have these stupid fucking dating bans because once they don't meet up to that image their success suffers. Idols already give up so much privacy, and the last thing they need is millions of people scrutinizing every little thing they do. I don't even know where I started this rant from, but basically, GIVE IDOLS PRIVACY AND DONT JUDGE THEM FOR THEIR PASTS OR FOR BEING IN RELATIONSHIPS OR WHATEVER

yeth ty for highlighting the gross obsession w purity and productivity (like the first anon said -- a very confucian sort of ideal)... i don’t rly have anything else to add here i think. also i would fight for soyou i fact i would fight lmh who said she was his ideal type in no.mercy era... she’s rly one of my faves and the way she was slandered for the hairdressing thing was one of the most ridiculous things knets ever did lmao honestly yuk

u a kihyun stan now👀👀👀

im a @fhiz​ stan it’s the same thing tbh

ahh so i saw your tags on that jh gifset! as one of the few jh stans (or maybe there are way more than i think there are lol) i rly love his "reversal charm." he has a lot of what i lack as a person: a strong presence and a lot of confidence! i respect him so much as a person alth i rag on him a lot LMAO. sorry if this is a bit long winded but i just rly wanted to put this out there ;;

this is rly cute i lov hearing ppl talk abt their faves lovingly it rly... Heals Me. i think it’s strange how underappreciated jooheon is in this fandom especially bc he’s usually the one who catches ur eye first bc he’s so hyped by starship as being a one-in-a-million talented rapper u know? and he rly shines in mvs and no.mercy but............. y does he have the least fansites jkfhdg ?? you’re v right abt the reversal charm thing but i feel like sometimes it’s very overdone like... on lots of shows he’s asked to do aegyo when rly he should be asked to... idk... rap or dance or something?? i actually think jooheon is the most serious member of monsta x sometimes bc he seems to have a sense that he’s.. the pillar of mx if that makes sense? and that’s why he’s always pushing himself and working tirelessly like he feels very Responsible for this group, more than anyone else. idk if that makes sense!!! i love him and i want him to... unwind a bit bc sometimes he looks so stressed and tired but he still feels the need to pretend to be energetic like my heart rly hurts for him :/ this got so emo im sry i do rly love to hear that u respect him sm i love jooheon stans :(

i can see what u mean about jooheon being 1 of the most masculine. (iirc u also talked abt kihyun being that in a post a while ago) like with his face and his physique he really is striking; his body=like that slim,upside-down Y that you'd learn to draw men w/ in Anatomy 101 , but i think.. ,--not that u asked, but,, i think the jury's still out on if he's comfortable w his masculinity with the way he acts feminine lyk misogynistic comedians Can sound like dead ringers for women,? idk & i take +

(not sure if there was a 2nd part to this? there’s nothing else in my inbox so i’m sry if there was and tumblr ate it) yeth i think i meant that his demeanor is the most ~~masculine~~ whereas i think kihyun is still the most... idk... mature-masculine?? if tht makes sense, and i definitely agree w u on that second point! i didn’t think of that at the time but now that i... do... think abt it... ur right and also the way he comes back from it by putting on the >swag demeanor again in an attempt to polarise it is definitely a bit 👀👀👀 he probably doesn’t want to risk his Manly Rapper Image for real u kno? that said it’s ingrained in kpop that behaving cute --> “girly” entails that sort of “comedic” high-pitched voice + compact body language etc.... like i’m not condoning that ofc but i definitely think it’s broader than this particular case! :/ hm

maybe i'd be doing better in school if i could major in kihyunology ;~; i stan him but i def think we still don't know much about him even after all this time after debut. especially when i look at him compared to wonho who wears his heart on his sleeve (bless him i love wonho sm, gotta protect this bun at all costs!!)...but ya it just makes me wanna learn more about him like who is the real kihyun??

i want to write a kihyun meta when i have time... i feel like i Get him a bit more these days but it’s also very hard to put into words bc u kno when u kinda sorta mb get some1 but it’s a feeling rather than anything conveniently expressable gkjdhfjk.... idk if anyone wants to send in some Kihyun Thoughts + Meta feel free! :>> i don’t think he’s actually... as complex as we sometimes make him out to be lol like his behaviour is actually kind of predictable? more on his later

wait is the february comeback actually true? ugh i'm so conflicted cuz on one hand i'm excited if there's really gonna be a full length album, but i also think they need more rest but then there's the matter of getting their first win and idk i'm super psyched but i'm also worried that the boys are being overworked

i still feel like they had a comeback like yesterday lol like looking at their schedules stresses me out bc they do so much..... im glad wonho got to go to his mum’s cafe recently tho! all we can do is have faith in them rn and when it’s time... stream, buy things if ur able to, spread the news and the hype etc. i am definitely Worried abt some things like the competition they’re up against but.... gotta have faith u kno... and i feel like all active idols are kind of... permanently worked very hard but i think currently only jooheon and shownu are a bit Overloaded. also has the date been confirmed yet... it’s february already...

1638.

● Name something you lost or gave away that can never be replaced. ummm i’m not sure...maybe some books i loved ● What 5 websites do you visit often, and why? tumblr, insta, twitter, iheartwatson, pixlr ● Name a totally useless possession and how you came to acquire it. i’m not sure ● What music album would be used for a movie about your life? lana del rey’s music ● List your bad habits and/or addictions and what you have tried to rid yourself of them. biting my nails, smoking, doing dumb shit with i can’t sleep

● If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be, and what would you do if later on you changed your mind? omgsh so many things...i can’t just pick one. ● What are your religious beliefs? Have they changed, or have they always stayed the same? i’m a christian. i grew up an athiest, became a christian at 18, became a satanist in my 20s and was one for 5 years, now i’ve been a christian for the past 2 years. ● When was your last food craving, and what did you crave? idk probably during my period ● Who was your first crush and what made them special? Kyle and nothing really lol ● Name your most cherished childhood memory. reading the harry potter books for the first time ● Turn to an entry in your journal or diary from a year or more ago. What has changed and what has stayed the same since then? no ● What is one thing nobody knows about you because nobody ever cared to ask? i’m not sure ● Robert Frost write a poem titled The Road Not Taken. Name a road you’ve always wanted to travel. Where do you hope it takes you, and what might you see on the way? um none? ● Name one thing you always wanted to do, but haven’t. What has prevented you from doing it? have kids; my meds ● Write about your first kiss. Was it everything you wished or hoped it would be? i mean it was really boring. i was just kissed ● What was the worst mistake or decision you have ever made in life? What could you have done differently? suicide attempts; um not done it ● What song was stuck in your head recently, and what were you doing at the time that made you think of it? i can’t think of a song

● Write about something you now know that you wish you knew earlier in life. How could this knowledge have helped you? therapy is important ● Write about your greatest fear. losing people i love ● Name one thing you feel brings out the good in people. love ● Describe a time in your life when everything turned out fine, despite the odds. i can’t think of one ● If you invented a device that could fix one problem you are facing right now, would you use it? What problem would you like to solve? something that took away anxiety forever ● Write about the last time you spoke to your best friend. What did you talk about? we talked about a film ● Describe a time you felt alone. all the time ● Name something you found; what was it and where did you find it? idk? ● What’s on your calendar for tomorrow? recording a podcast ● What is the most annoying sound you have ever heard? people brushing their teeth ● Describe your first job. i was a cashier ● What is the one thing you cannot live without? meds ● Quote the nicest thing anyone has ever said about you. "you’re a beautiful mess” ● Are you afraid of the dark? Why or why not? no ● Describe the longest amount of time you have ever been away from home. 6.5 months ● Write about a recent adventure or travels. i’m not going anywhere cause of covid lol ● Who did you idolize growing up? Emma Watson ● Name a celebrity or famous person you wish would take you out on a date. Leonardo DiCaprio ● Describe your daily routine when you get out of bed in the morning. start coffee, pee, check social media, email, and texts, read my bible and devotional, and then i practice french ● Name one thing you have always been good at doing. singing ● What is your favorite season, and why? i guess spring and just because ● What was the title of the last book you read? Little Fires Everywhere ● List your biggest regrets. living

● Have you ever seen a ghost? i believe so ● Describe your note-taking style and habits. i don’t really take notes ● Do you believe that we are all here for a reason? What might the reason be? i suppose but i don’t know ● What comes to mind when someone uses the phrase prolonging the magic? I’ve never heard that phrase. ● Have you ever done something just to feel the danger, or to feel alive? no i don’t think so ● What is your favorite cliché? idk ● What are all your thoughts on god? i love God ● How do rainy days make you feel? happier than on sunny days ● What is the most amount of money you have had at one time? A couple grand. ● Write a celebrity crush list. Leo DiCaprio ● What is the most amazing thing you have ever seen, heard, or experienced? idk ● What effect does music have on you? depends on the song ● What did you learn today? What did you learn yesterday? i’ve learned some french both today and yesterday ● What 5 traits do people first notice when they meet you for the first time? their face, weight, clothes, smile, speech ● Have you ever carved your name or initials into a tree or stone? not that i recall ● Does Never Never Land really exist? no ● Where is a great place to get breakfast? cracker barrell ● List 3 things that went right (or wrong) today. i just woke up like 2 hours ago so nothing ● What is the best method of travel, and in what ways have you traveled? plane; ive traveled by train, plane, and car ● If you could give the world just one thing, what would it be? healing ● What were your best and worst subjects in school or college? always science ● Describe the most outrageous thing anyone has dared you to do. idk ● Ice cream: chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry? vanilla ● What historical events happened the year you were born? i have no idea what happened in 1990 LOL ● Pick up a random object that has special meaning to you and describe it in as much detail as possible. a stuffed frog. it was from my Nanny and i received it after she died. i haven’t been apart from that frog since i was 5 years old ● Write about a recent visit to a museum or art gallery. - ● What food items do you consider staples in a well-balanced diet? i’m no good at this ● Describe your feelings in regards to an issue in todays society, and what would be done to fix it. scared ● If you had only one wish, what would you wish for? covid gone ● If you could tell the world just one thing, what would you say? STAY INSIDE

● Share a dirty little secret about yourself (or someone else). no ● Have you ever gone skinny dipping? no ● Name something you would like to devote more time to seeing or doing. lately, reading ● What is the name of your favorite book, magazine, or publication? Harry Potter ● Describe your first car. it was grey and it broke down alot lol ● Thunderstorms… Inspiring or scary? i hate them!!!!!

An Adopted Child

In the normal hustle and bustle of daily life, we always come across stories about childhood & teenagehood. Even if we take a trip around the blogosphere, we can’t go on without stumbling over a blog about it. I do have my fair share of childhood and teenage mementos along with my cousins and friends. And im so excited to go down memory lane and reminisce those happiest and vivid flashbacks. Thanks to my childhood friend way back puberty days, who reminded me to rekindle old memoirs.

Moving on…

I was born and bred in a humble town called Lallo. 

I was a Lola’s girl. Being one, i didnt have much playmates. I remember a few of my playmates tho. Chie- Chie, Ron- ron, Rachel, Ria, Vani, Rio, & Sherwin to name a few. We play “patintero” at night when the moon is in it’s full form. We construct a “bahay-bahayan” and do “lutu-lutuan” other times. Ive experience playing “sungka”, “shatong” and hide and seek with them. But when they’re not around, I just stay at home and play alone. Being alone is not cool so every weekend i have to convince my Mamala to go on a 2 days, 1 night stay over at my auntie’s and uncle’s place in Baculud Amulung. Tho i had this motion sickness whenever i ride a bus, it didn’t stop me from traveling. Whenever riding the famous Lallo Bus Line, Rodel or Rodcel Transit, which ever comes first, I make sure ill sit by the window side. It takes an hour of bus ride before reaching the place. I just couldn’t miss the Salamagui (Tamarind tree) before entering the house. This tree has been there for as long as i can remember. It stood the test of time. How many typhoons have passed but its still there standing proud and tall.

“Nakapasyar tuy kanakan ni Nelia nga dua rangan ubo na oh!” my uncle Rey would kiddingly say when i make “mano” to them. It has been a running joke in the family, that i was the little girl with a big bum. Lol

I remember…

One weekend, i noticed the Salamagui (tamarind tree) was swarming with fruits, I had the urge of climbing the tree and pick some of the fruits. But i was no-good at climbing trees. My cousins then wouldn’t want to help me because they were busy with their own “teks” and “gagamba fighting” stuff. I couldn’t just sit and wait for someone to pick the fruits for me so i tried to do the climbing myself. With several attempts and some scratches to my skin, i finally made it on top. (hallelujah) There, i feasted with the fruits with gusto (a bit sour tho). I even packed my 2 pockets before going down. But when I started to do go down, i found out i really didn’t know how to (my bad). I attempted on jumping but 'twas too high, I’d land a broken bone or two if i do. So, I stayed on top of the tree for several minutes before shouting for help (hahaha). My uncle went to my rescue immediately. The moment my foot landed on the ground, i got a taste of scolding. “Ti ulat mo gamin ti salamagui” my uncle Bobong enthused.

Going to the rice field in Daya with my cousins to pick up the infamous “bisukol” (golden apple snail), gathering “kangkong” (water spinach), mountain climbing, and “kuliglig” (handtractor) ride are among the other things i love doing when I’m in Baculud. 

I did swim in “Waig” (brook) along with a friend named Sophia Malamug, & I even went on a picnic in “Karintan” (a vast land for planting vegetables and root crops) with the Apacibles'. Ive experience harvesting corns and vegetables.

My cousin also tagged me along to help with her auntie’s tobacco harvesting and screwing it in bamboo stick (they call it gatud in ilocano) before putting it under the heat of the sun for drying.

I’ve also experienced walking 2 or 3 kilometers just to watch a local basketball tournament in the other barangay (Centro). I used to idolized few of the star players of Baculud thats why my cousin and I was eager to go even if we walk a long way. All these and more, made my childhood colorful and exciting. And im proud to say I grew up to this kind of routine, surrounded with good people. I didn’t notice much of the the hurly burly of life then because i was busy painting memories. Then one day, i just woke up and realized i barely have visited the place already. I got entangled with my books, hitting up deadlines with my term papers and thesis.

I remember…

There was a time i came by to visit amidst my hectic schedule because i need something for my school requirement. Everyone in my family & even the neighborhood helped me out in catching a cat for my anatomy class. They were happy they could help.

And Lek remembers Ron…

I go by the nickname “Sha “ to my friends. But my “Ron” monicker is only used by my family in Baculud so i was amazed when Lek told me about it and call me Ron. And then he told me a lot of things about me which i could barely remember already. And again, i got amazed. He had watch my journey when i was in Baculud. I call him, “Lek the blusher boy” - the boy who blushes like hell hahaha. Wonder if he still blushes nowadays. Even after my college graduation and had landed a job, I’d still came and visit. I became a fixture in the place (lol). And then one day my other-half saw me and courted me… i eventually stayed for good and built my own family. In a place where all my good memories sprouted! Yep! i am a daughter of Lallo but Baculud gladly embraced me from childhood to adulthood. That being said, Yes! Im an adopted child of Baculud Amulung and im proud of it!