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satorubi · 1 year

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#1 : SLUT CERTIFIED ! — eren yaeger

꒱ ➛ CHAPTER SYNOPSIS : eren’s first favor.

˚◞♡ who ?? : eren yaeger x black fem! reader

˚◞♡ word count : 8.2K ( i am so sorry )

˚◞♡ chapter warnings : minors DO NOT interact, mentions of female anatomy, fem! reader using she/her pronouns, somewhat bimbo reader ??? mentions of asshole connie, mentions of player! connie ( i’m sorry ), use of profanity, oral penetration, cunninlingus, body worship, fingering, pet names such as [ mama, baby, angel ] slow-paced smut, a little bit of a cliffhanger.

˚◞♡ author’s note : NUMBER ONE — i am so sorry for posting this so late. i ended up re-writing the entire thing many times but i have a good feeling ab this ver. BUT ANYWAY !!!! first chapter !!! yayyy !! i’m very exited to share this with you alllll <3 i appreciate the amount of support you’ve given me before this was released and i love u for it 🫶🏽 anyways, excuse any mistakes or typos !! i hope you enjoy. reblogs n interactions are deeply loved <33

the typical friday night lights of the city shined brightly through eren’s studio apartment. nothing but the sound of livid drivers behind their steering wheels and the occasional dog barking at whomever may pass by. not to mention you — his best friend ; sitting next to him with a burning blunt plied between your fingers as your eyes intensely gaze at the soothing window view.

although, you didn’t exactly look so soothed.

there was a look of a apprehension pervading your features, almost as if you were deep in thought. eren sets his jaded irises on you and the small smile that once stretched across his lips fades.

“uh, you good?”

your eyes trail over when you take heed to his question, w taking a breath before looking at him with hopeful eyes. usually, you didn’t find yourself having such a challenging time when asking eren anything, but as of right now, the next few sentences you say may or may not tarnish your friendship.

“i’m fine. i um.. i just don’t know how to really ask you this,” you confess. eren then turns his rested head towards you, eyes looking at you with scrutiny as he tries to piece together what exactly that little mind of yours was thinking.

“talk to me, what’s wrong? i do somethin’ again?” you rashly shake your head from side to side, grabbing his hands in yours and squeezing as you nervously laugh —

“you know your friend connie, right?”

the audible groan that leaves eren’s lips is priceless, and so was the look on his face, “you mean the annoying bald motherfucker from high school that won’t leave me alone? hm, the name doesn’t really ring a bell.”

well if that wasn’t obvious enough, yes, they knew each other. they’d been friends for a while now. you can recall first meeting connie during your junior year of high school ; eren introducing you at a house party your devious asses had no business being at. he was cute, and even a little funny, but you’d never really paid attention to him until a few months ago.

him now being in his twenties meant you got to see him grow to cover his body with ink — his arms and legs. and you most definitely couldn’t forget the amount of muscle he’d gained just over a year after graduating high school. point being, he was just your type. and you were his. that’s why it didn’t take very long for you two to begin talking. but of course, after a few dates and many, many occasions of giving him severe blue balls, you figured it was finally time to step it up a notch.

“well you know we’ve been talking for a while now..and we’ve been planning to go out of the city for a little vaycay and i was thinking that maybe it was time he and I could take our relationship to the next — “

“for him to fuck you and break up with you like he did that one girl last year? nah. not lettin’ you do that.” he interrupts you before you could even begin to finish, shaking his head from side to side as he focuses his attention back to the moving city outside the window.

you could say he was being harsh, but at the end of the day, eren knew him better than you did — regardless of being familiar with one another since the early age of fourteen. connie was a heartbreaker. a true player at heart.

that boy couldn’t keep a woman for longer than a month before tossing her to the side as if she was some accessory — many of those women being too good to for him to begin with.

women like you.

the women who were too kind for their own good. the women who never failed to put a smile on a saddened face with just a few simple words. you were the type of woman he’d easily break — and that was just something eren couldn’t bare to swallow. but alas, who was he to judge? he just wanted to see you happy — that was his one and only concern, and if this whole ordeal would succeed that goal, he has no problem doing whatever he can to get you there.

“i wasn’t asking for your permission. i just needed your help, but i guess it’s useless to ask now.” the look of lost hope on your face pulls at eren’s heartstrings, him almost immediately exhaling and rolling at eyes at the sight of your pleading yet condescending gaze.

“jesus, what do you want? advice? intel? a wing man—“

“i want you to teach me how to fuck.”

it took everything in him not to laugh because the more he held your gaze, the more he realized you were genuinely being serious. eren’s eyes nearly pop out of his skull. you stare, waiting for his response as he gives you an intrigued looked rather than a confused one, “i think you need to elaborate. that’s a crazy sentence to say.”

“y’know, like blowjo —“

“i know what sex is, yn.”

you and the word ‘fuck’ had never been been a thought in eren’s mind up until now, so to know he’d be the one seeing you bare for the first time was definitely…mind boggling. seriously, the closest eren has come to even seeing a glimpse of you would have to be when you went scuba diving in miami for your nineteenth birthday — and even then, you were still somewhat clothed.

“i know it’s weird and i completely get it if you aren’t comfortable with —“

“i mean..i don’t really mind teaching you. i’d rather you learn from me rather than a lame ass porno.”

that was a response you weren’t expecting. you’d made sure to prepare yourself for rejection when you came over, but eren had proved you wrong. he didn’t seem to be phased — a resting grin on his face whilst you fully comprehend his answer.

“wait — really?”

he nods, shrugging his broad shoulders, “yeah? it’s not like we like each other or somethin.’ just think of it as my favor to you.” eren motions his fingers for you to pass him the blunt, but you nearly drop it from your fingers as you toss your arms around his neck — embracing him tightly as you whisper a stream of ‘thank yous’ into his neck.

you feel eren’s palms trail up and down your spine, rubbing the small of your back. he laughs at your excitement, “what’s connie gonna’ think about all this, hm?” he questions — validly questions. of course he didn’t like the guy, but he still needed some source of clarity. his days of fucking someone else’s girl were long gone and he’d never step foot into that life ever again. it was too messy.

“he doesn’t know he’d be my first — well, second..besides you. plus, he said it himself : we’re not official! it’s not wrong to see other people,” you casually say this as if you hadn’t just admitted to connie openly voicing that he was playing you, but then again, if you didn’t see an issue, neither did eren.

“yeah, i bet he did say that.”

“oh don’t be like that. you’re such a hater — he is your friend after all,” you poke at his bicep teasingly, amused at the side eye he sends you. you knew eren and connie relationship wasn’t the absolute best — frenemies you’d like to call it. they had their good days, and their bad ones, but you knew, on the outside looking in, it was endless love for one another all around.

“he’s an acquaintance.”

your eyes roll and you huff, “whatever. when do you wanna do this? i leave for the trip in a few weeks. i wanna’ be as ready as possible before then.”

“well, i gotta’ meet up with jean and armin for poker tomorrow night, but after that i’m free if you —“

“great. we’ll start tomorrow. and poker? what are you, old men?”

“oh hush, you like to knit.”

you shove him and you both begin burst out in laughter. the rest of the night was spent doing what you and eren would normally do — watching movies, chatting amongst yourselves and every now and then, casually bickering like an old married couple over the silliest of things.

but these innocent gestures would soon hold a brand new meaning in such a short amount of time. neither of you realized the mistake you were about to make. the days of occasional i love you’s and holding hands out of comfort were long gone now.

saturday night at armin’s ; a night looked forward to by most —most meaning eren and eren only. there was no better feeling than getting together with his closest friends to trash talk, share a few glasses of rum, and catch up on whatever life had thrown at one another throughout the week.

but what he loved most watching the look of defeat on jean’s face when eren finally placed his last chips. it was a scene he’d pay for.

“you’re a fuckin’ cheater.”

eren laughs, stretching his arms across the table and pulling the pile of neatly stacked chips toward himself. he takes a moment to look over at armin who has his phone out recording jean’s rage all the while chuckling tauntingly under his breath.

“hating the player when you should be hating the game. that’s crazy.”

“fuck you,” jean mumbles. eren steers his attention away from the grown man’s mini tantrum when he hears an angry knock at armin’s door. heads turn in unison, “damn armin. forgot you had a girl comin’ over tonight or something?” the blonde rises from his seat, walking over to take a look at the peephole to reveal a standing connie in front of the door, “it’s just con, guys.” the door is pulled open, and at the sound of connie’s name eren could already feel himself tuning everyone out.

the sound of connie’s voice alone was enough to make eren want to gather his keys and satchel to make a run for it, but it was nowhere near the time to meet with you.

“its about time y’all answer the fuckin’ door. i’ve been knocking and waiting for like thirty minutes now,” this was a lie. poker always started at seven, and it was now thirty past nine.

“you’re late,” eren huffs. connie gives him the finger, scoffing as he makes his way over to the table, “where were you?” eren sounded like a stern parent scolding their child, but at the end of the day, there was something off about connie in this moment that was shifting his mood from solemn to easily irritable.

“damn, am i not allowed to oversleep every once in a while?” oversleep eren’s ass. the purple and blueish colored bruises beginning to taint connie’s neck said otherwise. he’d obviously been acting on that ‘seeing other people’ bullshit he fed you — and if eren was being honest, the lack of coverage showed just how little he respected you.

eren conjures a smug laugh, “oversleeping huh?” jean does the same, vividly noticing the markings as his eyes peer over to the exact spot as eren’s, “more like fucking. i see you and yn are becoming pretty close, huh ?” he asks.

“y-yeah, yeah. she’s great, man.”

“just great? you’ve been talking for like four or five months now,” armin chimes in, and thank the heavens above that he did. it was evident that the group as a collective were well aware of connie’s shitty behavior.

“i mean…it’s nothin’ too serious. she’s cute, for real. we’re just taking it slow.” nothing too serious? for christ’s sake, he was planning a getaway with you in a few weeks. it’s like all of this was just a little game of cat and mouse to him. you’d think connie being aware of how tightly knit you and eren were would give him some sort of change at heart, but nope — that was just connie for you.

eren could practically feel the blood pumping through his veins. he rolls his tongue around the inside of his cheek, tapping lightly onto the wooden table with a deep mug twisting his chiseled features.

“i think ima’ call it a night,” eren voices, rising from his reclined position slowly while avoiding eye contact, “i have some shit to do.” shit to do meaning heading towards your place earlier than he should be. he couldn’t stand to be around connie and his ignorance. it was depriving and overall time consuming.

“the fuck? i just got here, eren,” connie scoffs, but eren doesn’t stick around long enough to hear the bass in his voice rise to a T. the door slams behind him, eren now making his way out of the door and down the hall to head for his black mustang parked out front. the skin of his cheeks and the tips of his ears flushed pink with a crack of discomfort bubbling inside of him.

the moment he unlocked his car doors and hopped in, he didn’t know if the adrenaline was getting to him or just the sheer fact that he liked the taste of making connie angry, but that whole interaction just made him all more enthused to see you.

no matter how much you liked connie or how much you cared about a potential relationship with him, he couldn’t beat the fact that eren would easily treat and fuck you way better than he ever could — hypothetically speaking, of course.

and that’s why, the only thought on his mind was to make tonight a moment you’ll never forget.

with a day consisted of excruciatingly long lectures and excessive amounts of homework given by your professors, you could finally find yourself prancing down your apartment hallway, eager to enter your home to prepare for what the night had in store.

you fumble with the keys on your baby-pink lanyard, specially made for you and given to you by eren for your birthday one year. the sound of your living room television could be faintly heard resonating through the wood as you started to unlock your door. you furrow your brows since you know for a fact that you made sure to turn it off before you departed earlier this morning.

your hand twists at the nob, the fingers of your opposite hand clutching tightly onto your pepper spray, but to your surprise — you quickly feel a sense of relief travel through your body as you see none other than eren. his legs spread, arms behind his head as he lounges on your white couch which a bowl of half eaten ice cream resting on the coffee table before him.

to say he startled you would be an understatement, but the sound of your keys jangling did just about the same to him : his head almost immediately turning toward the door to face you.

“what are you doing here, ren? and how the fuck did you even get—“

“you gave me a key, remember?” he asks, pointing to his neatly hung set of keys on the coat hook beside the front door. as soon as you turn to look in that way, his lifeless lips start to smile and he begins to giggle at your confusion, “damn, about to pepper spray me and everything, huh?” he quips.

you simply plop down next to him, sinking into the warmth of the sofa as his arm gently moves to rest behind your head, “you’re the one who can’t send a damn text. it would’ve been nice to have a heads up, ren,” he smiles at your tone ; sounding just like his mother, carla, when she used to yell at him for being a sneak.

ah, what a time.

“i thought it was poker night. i didn’t think i’d see you until ten,” your inquiry was enough to make eren riled up all over again, but for your sake, he chooses to leave out the part where he nearly wanted to slap your potential partner across his face.

“i kept winning, so i left. it got boring.”

eren’s blatant lie didn’t seem to phase you. in fact, you seemed to have easily glossed over his sorry excuse of a response, and instead choosing to gush over the possibility of him seeing connie.

“was con there? did he say anything about me?” you giddily ask, a smile complimenting your dilated pupils with just the mention of his name. eren only sheepishly grins, “yeah, he was there alright. called you cute too.”

eren barely cracks a smile at this, seeing how effortlessly your face lit up at the sound of the bare minimum. poor, sweet, innocent yn — too blinded to realize the boy you spoke so highly of only used a simple sentence when speaking of you. it was sad almost, seeing you be so naïve. but then again, telling you wouldn’t make a difference — it would only start an argument.

“he’s so sweet. i think he gets nervous in front of you guys…y’know, when he talks about me.”

“…right.” eren decides to navigate the conversation elsewhere, “so..did you wanna’ get some food or something before we start or..”

“don’t be so awkward, eren,” you laugh. you squeeze his bicep consolingly, “i’m gonna’ go freshen up a bit and then we can get going. it’s been a long day.” you tread off toward your room, shutting the door behind you and leaving eren alone on your living room couch.

for some odd reason, eren found himself to be more nervous than he was when he first entered. he didn’t know if it was the mystery of it all or the simple fact that he would be seeing you naked for the first time, but his heart was damn near beating out of his chest.

the scuffling sounds coming from your bedroom only induces his anxious heart, eyes directing their attention toward howl’s moving castle playing quietly on the tv.

“eren! can you come in here for a minute?” he hears your soft voice call out from behind the door. eren blinks a few times, confused on why you hadn’t just come out yet, but the moment he opens the door to your room — he knows.

there you were, standing in the connected bathroom in front of the mirror, adjusting and shifting your waist length faux locs from one side to the other. your body was decorated in a pink, two piece lingerie set. he’s stunned to say the least, eyes tracing the outline of your figure — picking and observing the small tattoos sitting just above your ass and right below your left thigh.

“eren? you with me?” your question snaps him out of your forbidden trance. eren clears his throat, running a hand down his chest in a self-comforting manner. it takes everything in him to control the arousal forming in his pants. there was no denying it — you were fucking gorgeous, but this wasn’t a regular hookup and you weren’t just a regular girl.

you were his best friend and right now, the hard cock in his pants is thinking otherwise.

“y-yeah, i’m with you. i’m right here.” you don’t see the way his eyes look you up and down, nor do you see him sucking on his bottom lip while doing so. instead, your focus is on the inner thoughts in your head, pondering about if your choice of attire was overdone.

“is it too much? i saw it at the mall earlier today after class and i thought it would be fitting —“ he cuts you off before you could even dare finish that sentence.

“nah, you..,” he takes a moment, looking at you in awe as if he’d just seen an angel, “you look beautiful.” you don’t perceive the smoothness of his voice but it’s there. it’s so obviously there, and you’re so obviously breathtaking.

face bare, lips coated in a thin layer of lipgloss and smelling as if you’d just showered in roses — like said, breathtaking.

“i-im sorry. i can take it off if it makes you uncomfortable —“

“no.” that slips out faster than he intended, but he didn’t care. it got his point across simple enough. you laugh, turning to your left to finally come face to face with him, only to dig eren in a deeper hole than he was already in.

“well..i’m ready when you are,” you announce. seeming to be all around enthused about this, you take a few steps closer, inching forward to the point where you’re arms length away. eren still stands there, quiet with gentle eyes as he grips the top ledge of the doorframe. you hear his breathing become unsteady, almost as if he’d lost that smooth talking, serenading attitude he once carried.

he felt like the virgin here.

“are you nervous?” you ask, studying the way his eyes pierce while he stares at your lips, “we can stop before it starts.”

with he way he was feeling, a wise man would’ve called it all off, but eren…eren needed needed you. he needed to touch you, to feel you, to please you in some way — beyond the act of just giving you guidance.

he answers your question with a question, “are you?” you shake your head, rocking back and forth on the heels of your feet as you wait for his next statement.

but his next move surprises you.

without hesitation, you watch as eren towers over you, taking his thumb and index to lift your chin — letting you naturally meet his alluring gaze, “can i kiss you, yn?” the moment you begin to nod is the same exact moment when his lips brush against your own. the contact almost shocking the both of you as a small gasp leaves your mouth, and his stuttered hand grasps the side of your neck.

eren was kissing you. he was kissing you as if you’d easily break under his touch. the butterflies in your stomach begin to flip. by default, you close your eyes and fall into it — moving along and following his soft yet hungry pace.

it was funny. it was like you were kissing each other as if you’d been waiting to do so your entire lives. considering you’d always deemed eren as attractive and an overall somewhat decent man, the thought of him giving you butterflies had never occurred.

if anything, those same butterflies were present while you spent time with connie, but never ever have they fluttered like this. maybe it was the heat of the moment, or maybe it was just an effort to set the mood, but this felt like an eternity you’d never wish to end.

his hand was incredibly light against your neck, giving you a distinct chill as the one creeping down your waist sends an unfamiliar shiver elsewhere. as the kiss gradually intensifies, over the course of a few seconds, reaching its peak, he then sucks on your bottom lip. pulling and yanking on it like he was in dire need of more — which he was.

he’s groaning, he’s hard, and most importantly, he’s infatuated. your lips felt like heaven against his, so plush and so comforting. eren was so lost in you that he couldn’t even begin to fathom the consequences that may come.

“y-you can touch me some more,” you mumble in between breaths — and that was all he needed.

“where…tell me where, baby.”

baby — a word you thought you never hear coming out of eren’s mouth when referring to you. it didn’t make you contemplate much though, it was hard to think about anything at all once you felt his hands grip and mush at your backside. he fondles it in his palms, letting your skin mold into his hands.

“i more, ren. more please…”

he hears you, he hears you so clearly — and he wants more of you too, “what, hm? want me to touch you here?” you feel his hand sneak around toward your inner thigh, fingers tips grazing the area near your pussy. you let out an unexpected sigh of pleasure.

“an important part of intimacy is what makes you feel good. so tell me, what feels good to you, yn?” eren appeared to look and sound more confident than he felt.

“h-here. here feels good.” you gesture toward your pretty pink underwear that had been fighting to be taken off for the last five minutes. eren was just as ready as you were, waiting for the moment you were comfortable enough to allow him to please you like he was itching to.

“yeah, you like touching yourself there don’t you?”

“y-yes,”

“you want me to touch you there?”

there should be a world record for how quickly you whimper ‘yes’ under your breath. the same goes for how quickly eren scoops you from the floor, cupping his hands underneath the back of your thighs as he carries you in his arms toward your bed. eren lays you on your back, your spine hitting the fluffed sheets of your mattress. as much as he wanted you right then and there, the thought of your innocence comes back to mind.

this was your first time.

“we’ll take it slow, alright?” he asks, and when he doesn’t hear a response from you he becomes worried. the energy shifts from hot and hasty to nerve wracking and what the fuck am i doing, and it’s evident, “do you wanna’ stop? we can forget that shit in the bathroom ever happened, okay? i don’t mind—“

“no! no, it’s..it’s okay, ren. really, i’m just a bit nervous that’s all.”

you weren’t lying. you were more than comfortable with him being the one to do this. in truth, you were more turned on than you’ve ever been, but then again this was all so surreal. the boy you’ve called best friend your entire life was about to be the first to see you in such a personal way.

there were so many what ifs — too many to count on your own two hands. what if there was a possibility he gets uninterested mid-way through? what if he was judgmental of the way you looked? what if he lies about your anatomy just to spare you the embarrassment?

these were all the things you’d thought of, but these were also all of the things that eren would never in a million fucking years do.

“nervous? of me?”

“it’s just, you’re the only one who’s ever…seen down there and i don’t know if —“

“look at me.” his hands travel up and down your thighs, comforting and soothing your jitters as you fight the intense amount of eye contact he was throwing your way, “can you look at me, please?” eren’s treasuring voice allows you to relax a bit, your eyes meeting his.

“you’re an angel — an absolute angel. you have nothing to be ashamed of. especially in front of me, okay?” you nod, breath remaining steady after hearing his words of encouragement. you shoot him that sweet, signature smile, allowing him to wipe away the small tear that’d fallen down your cheek.

“you’re too pretty to be cryin’ like that. worrying over nothing. lemme’ make you feel better..”

you let your back fall back onto your bed once again, watching as eren lowers down onto his knees while coming face to face with your cunt, “spread your legs for me,” he kindly orders. eren has no problem helping you do so, lifting your squished thighs onto his shoulders while your ass hangs off of the bed.

he takes the hair tie around his wrist and gathers his hair back, pulling his strands into a low, loose bun to the back of his head. there were a few more pieces of small hairs that scattered across his hairline, making him look all the more handsome than he already did.

“ready?”

you nod.

“if there’s ever a time where you want me to stop, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

you wished you could’ve captured the look on his face on camera, cause it was definitely a sight to remember. you hadn’t seen his cheeks this red since he peed himself in front of his crush in the second grade.

“can i take these off?” these referring to your underwear. the same pair underwear that reveal a damp patch in the middle now that eren was really looking at them. once you voice a simple yes, he takes a second to admire you. running his fingers along the waistband, eyes roaming all over with no clue what they should look at first. you were too pretty — too lovely for him to even begin comprehending.

eren hears you lightly groan, and he begins to pry your underwear off, but he does this slowly — so slowly that it’s almost unbearable for you. he was moving as if you were a brittle creature in danger of being easily corrupted ; which you were, and that’s when he felt the need to pinch himself. seeing your hips lurch around in an effort to get him to move faster was one of the cutest things eren’s ever laid his eyes on.

there was no way he was in this position right now. kneeled in front of you with your bare cunt staring back at him, your folds sleek with your own liquid bliss dripping from them like honey on a comb. to put it short, you looked good enough to eat — and that’s exactly what eren was going to do : devour you like you were the last meal he’d ever be able to taste.

he kisses your inner thighs, the intention of leaving marks becoming prevalent as he makes his way down toward your pussy, “you ever play with yourself?” eren was so close — close enough for you to be able to feel his breath on your clit, tickling you.

“s-sometimes,” you couldn’t look at him. not when he’s on his knees and touching you like this. he hadn’t even begun the action and you were already losing hope in the idea of you being able to keep your composure.

“ever had someone do it for you?”

with unsteady breaths leaving your lips, you choose to answer honestly, “no.” he chuckles, taking his thumb and unexpectedly grazing it over your clit. you nearly jolt at the feeling. given you’ve been the only one with the access down there, it felt much different feeling someone else’s hand.

“i can tell. look at how responsive you are, mama.” he sounded fascinated, flicking you gently just to get you used to the sensation. you felt so sensitive, so fragile — and that wouldn’t even be the be the end of it, “and this pussy’s so fuckin’ wet..”

“erenn… wanna — i wanna’ feel more!”

“what, hm? more what?” he keeps at the slow pace of his thumb, not stopping or increasing until he hears your next few words fill his ears and shoot straight to his pants.

“your mouth..wanna’ feel your mouth, ren. please?” you say this as if he didn’t look like he was sitting on the edge of his seat just waiting for you to grant him the access. it doesn’t take any further words for eren to latch his mouth onto your pussy slowly. he makes an introduction with small pecks to your visibly puffy clit, making sure to pay attention to the way your body reacted to the simple touch.

he watches your belly rise up and down from the snag in your pattern of breath. once he sees you begin to grow comfortable, he makes the jump to lay his tongue flat against your pussy, licking a long stripe against your core and letting the sticky salvia from his mouth lubricate you.

“ooh – fuck!” you whimper, quickly covering your mouth once realizing what’d slipped out. eren sees this, reaching his hand out for you to grab before taking his mouth off of you for a split second.

“don’t do that shit. i wanna’ hear you.”

he resumes, pressing the bridge of his nose against your clit and licking your folds to create a sort of double penetration. you feel the texture of his tongue tickling your labia, applying minimum pressure to ensure a pleasurable stream of delight traveling through your belly, “feels s-so good. you’re so fucking good at tha – nnn!” when eren starts to feel himself losing his breath, he comes up for air, just to see you now resting on your elbows and looking down at him with quizzical eyes. he’d never seen you look so happy.

there was sweat beaming from your forehead and a bit of it forming on your upper lip, the lips that which eren was fighting the urge to kiss. your bra strap had slipped down a bit, now resting on your upper arm and exposing a bit of your nipple that slipped from the cup.

“w-why’d you stop?” you ask, hyperventilating. eren rests his head against the inner flesh of your thigh, looking as dazed as ever.

“i-im sorry, you just look…so pretty.”

this wasn’t out of the norm. eren always made it a goal to uplift you whenever he could, but there was something about the deliverance of that sentence that sent your mind into a never-ending frenzy. it was hard to believe that this was anything more than just a simple gesture to really get himself into character with the heart shaped desire he carried in his eyes.

“you look pretty too,” the echo in your head must’ve been deceiving you. you’d hoped to keep that one to yourself but the look on his face told you that he’d definitely heard you say that out loud.

“yeah? bet you wonder what else i look pretty doin’ don’t you?”

a smug grin appears on his lips, but the teasing remark did no justice for how he truly felt. instead, he just decides to show you ; placing his mouth back into your pussy with little to no remorse with his tongue this time. your hands magically find their way to his hair, running your nails through his scalp as you balance your upper body with one elbow. eren groans into you, the sound reverberating through your core and shaking you a bit.

at one point, his fingers brush past your hole, earning a loud unexpected moan from you. this shocks him, almost as much as it shocks you. you didn’t know why, but there was a sense of urgency pumping through your veins. you wanted more — more than what he was already giving you after you’d asked the first time.

“oh? you want a finger, don’t you?”

“mmfuck – yes! yes, just, do something eren, please!” you beg. your back arches from the sheets, fists bawling with anticipation. eren stands onto his feet and finds a seat on the bed. his back now rests against the headboard, eren’s chest heaving as he motions his index and middle finger in a ‘come here’ motion.

you hesitate at first, not sure exactly where he wants you until he’s pulling you into the space between his thighs. you instantly feel the warmth as you collide with his tank top covered chest. he was so much larger than you — and well, that’s the benefit of having a best friend that stood tall at a whopping 6’3.

“lemme’ see that pussy,” eren orders and you oblige quickly, parting your thighs for him once again while his chin sits in the crook of your neck, “isn’t she pretty, look at her..” you feel his hand grasping on your jaw softly, directing your focus to the soppy, wet cunt between your legs.

you were still so wet. wet enough to feel your essence dripping down your crack and onto your bed. you were messy but you wanted to be messier — you wanted to feel messier.

and he reads your thoughts before you even have to say a damn thing.

“you want me to play with you, hm? teach you how to take fingers before takin’ dick, is that right?”

“ren, just do something –“

“answer me, baby. don’t be shy. this is about you and what you want. so why don’t you just tell me what it is you want from me?” the room felt hot, and the air felt thick. the only contact between you both being your back against eren’s chest and his hand casually caressing your tummy, “p-put them in. god – just put them the fuck in,” you whine. eren’s chest fumbled with a laugh and he gives the side of your forehead a quick kiss.

“there she is.”

goosebumps pattern your chestnut skin when you finally feel his hand inching toward your pussy. you carefully watch, mouth held agape and your eyes batting shut the moment his fingers move in a counterclockwise motion against your agitated clit.

“gotta’ prep you some more, okay? i don’t wanna’ hurt you.” oh, right, pain. you’d been so blindsided by the pleasure that you’d forgotten that this in fact was not the simplest of processes.

eren keeps rubbing your clit, his eyes piercing into the side of your skull as he does this. you take a second to observe the veins that decorated his forearms. blue and greenish lines hiking from his wrist to his inner elbow. you’d always thought he had the prettiest hands. so neatly manicured and topped with a thick coat of clear polish — a pink color if you’d volunteer to paint them for him.

you don’t know why, but all of this made you crave him — badly. you turn your head, wandering eyes finding his. you stare at him, then his lips, then him again. he looked so kissable.

you just had to do it.

leaning in, you take in his musky scent and it lures you in closer. so close to where you’re practically poking your lips out to get him to kiss you back — and he does. for the second time tonight, your heart bursts with excitement feeling his lips on yours. you place your hands on his thighs, grinding along with his fingers, “i think i’m wet enough,” you mumble. he looks down, seeing that — you were indeed wet enough. your slick covered the majority of his fingers and your pulsing pussy felt like it was just about ready to give up on its orgasm.

“i think so too,” he pauses the motion, hovering his middle finger over your hole, and begins to softly lubricate the area with your own mess, “it’ll be uncomfortable at first. body isn’t used to being stretched, y’know?” eren pauses, lips coming close to your ear as he whispers, “but i’ll break you in…and i’ll do it so good…and you’re gonna’ tell me just how good it feels, okay?”

that sentence alone got you wetter, and eren feels this — literally. he kisses your temple over and over as he slowly begins to push his finger inside of you, “don’t look away, you’ll miss how good you’re doing..” you clench onto his opposite arm ; the one that wasn’t busy giving you a bit of discomfort, and you bite down on your bottom lip.

it was one finger, and you’d been used to that. you’d done it to yourself maybe once or twice, but you’ve never gotten any sort of pleasure out of doing so. but now, it felt so different — the slow in and out, in and out, pace. his finger pushing and gliding along your snugged walls while he licks and nips at your neck and ear. it felt amazing.

“f-fuck eren, so…so good,” your breathless chest rises and falls, nipples as hard as they’ve ever been — needing to be touched. your hand slowly creeps up to touch one of your needy tits, gripping and mounding it in your hand slowly while pulling your nipples between your fingers.

he’s watching you — studying you, actually. this wasn’t just a learning experience for you, but for him as well. eren was learning exactly how to navigate your body. he knew which itches to scratch and what barriers you’d overcome. he got to see you in your purest form — carefree and exhilarated.

“y’know…the human body is a temple, yn,” eren begins, resting his head on your shoulder as he wraps his other arm across your chest, pulling you in tightly, “only the worthiest of men should be able to touch you like this.” you didn’t know where he was going with this, and you didn’t know why it was giving you the feeling it was, but you wouldn’t stop it even if you had the option to. his finger felt too good. you wanted — no, you needed another.

“so, what makes me so worthy, baby?”

“b-because i trust you.”

you feel the pressure of another finger slowly making its move to inch it’s way in — eren holding back until you give him the green light to even try, “yeah? you trust me to do this too?” he asks, pushing the second finger past your barricade as gently as he could. he didn’t lie, the stinging discomfort was nothing to mess with — but you wanted it.

“sh-shit eren!

you wanted to feel him stuff you full.

you clench your eyes shut, face scrunching up as you whine a bit at the temporary pain, “you’re doing good, yn. you’re bein’ such a good girl..”

that opened you up more. able to get better access to you, eren’s fingers moving together as one eventually became pleasurable. the uncomfortable feeling had subsided and somehow turned into an eye rolling, spine twisting pressure against your core. his fingers were slowly, but surely, jabbing into your pussy, a small creamy noise following behind his movements as the wetness of you makes it easier for him to get around.

“o-ooh! fuuuck, eren…right there –” you could barely maintain pulling a full sentence from your brain, but luckily for you, you didn’t need to say a word. eren could feel every little thought or emotion through your pussy. the way your walls naturally open up for him, giving him the opportunity to find that perfect spot ; it was like you were made for this — made for him.

“she’s so needy – thinkin’ maybe i should move a little faster, don't you? all i wanna’ do is make you cum, mama.” he says this as if it’s a promise — and to be honest, he was pretty close to achieving that promise. the sound of your whines and the squirms of your hips were enough to tell him to pick up speed.

so that's exactly what he does.

eren plunges his fingers in and out of you, poking at what he was certain was your g-spot — every time he’d hit it with his fingertips, there was another whimper leaving your mouth, “i feel that pussy tightin’ up, you wanna’ cum, don’t you?” tauntingly, he asks this as if you weren’t already on the brink of tears, “don’t fight yourself. let it go.”

now eren’s hand is moving rapidly, automatically making your legs spread further open. now, he was really there — and so were you. the knot in your stomach that's been there this whole time was starting to unravel. you rest your head firmly against his shoulder, “rennn – feels so fuckin’ good! don’t stop, please don’t stop!”

“i won’t, baby. i’m right here – i feel you, just let me have it.” his encouragement works and he reels you in. you feel your stomach contracting as your heart starts to race. eren sits you up straight, keeping your weakened body from falling over while he keeps working your pussy.

“eren, eren, eren! f-fuuck yess!” you shout and his fingers curl upwards creating a distinct squelching sound and you claw onto whatever you could find — that being the same arm between your legs.

“cum for me. cum for me, come on,” out of nowhere, you release — and all over his hand, at that. your eyes are wandering, seeing blank spots trickling the ceiling as you cum on both eren’s fingers and your mattress, “atta’ fuckin’ girl..”

he pumps you some more before slowly pulling his fingers out, leaving a stringed trail of your cum to follow them. there was enough on him for both he, and you to get a little taste — but he needed to know you were okay first.

you were reclined against his chest still, eyes closed with your exhales being rather hoarse. eren wraps both arms around you, hugging you from behind as he kisses the top of your scalp repeatedly, “m’ so proud of you, yn. you did great – so, fuckin’ great.”

your head is still in a slight daze, and although your vision had come back, you hadn’t yet gained the full consciousness to realize what the hell just happened.

eren just fingered you.

eren just made you cum.

eren just mind fucked you.

there were so many things to think about, so many moments to cherish, but most importantly — there were so many doubts running through your mind. you walked into your apartment today under the impression that this would just be a piece of cake : he comes in, he teaches you, he leaves — that’s it. so why did you want to remain snuggled into his arms? why did you want him to kiss you to sleep after coming down from that life changing orgasm?

why did you want…eren?

“you okay? i wasn’t too rough was i? anything hurt?” he must’ve sensed your uncertainty. you quickly rise a bit, turning over your shoulder only to see him with worried eyes.

“no, no. you were perfect,” you go to lift your hand up to side of his face but you stop before completing that thought, “but, i think we need to make some rules.” his already flattened expression got even flatter. eren could feel his heart dropping to his stomach at the thought of even making you uncomfortable in the slightest bit. that was the last thing he’d ever want to do.

“r-rules?”

you nod, now feeling the need to sit directly in front of him, still in between his legs. you hold his hands in yours, looking at him with sympathy, “you did nothing wrong, ren. i just think we should set some boundaries?”

“oh. so..uh, what’d you have in mind?”

you sit there for a moment, reminiscing back to a few moments ago when you were shaking in his comforting grasp, “well, maybe we should hold off on the kissing? i just…i’m with connie and i don’t think it’s appropriate to kiss you while —“

“got it.”

you’re left silent. eren had a habit of cutting you off, but as of right now, he seemed rather passive than talkative. the guy couldn’t even make eye contact with you. he only sits, eyes fixed on any other object in sight but you.

“eren —“

“it’s okay, really. i understand. no kissing, anything else you can think of that you might wanna’ add?” eren held a forced grin. there was no need to elucidate. he’d already caught on to what you were throwing down. you wanted him to forget about it. you wanted him to pretend like the brief moment of his lips on yours didn’t mean anything. he knows you’re confused, and so was he, but to deny the spark between you both in that moment would be ludicrous.

“well i…i haven’t really thought about anything else yet, but i’ll let you know when i do,” you stare into eren’s empty eyes for a few more seconds before he abruptly gets up and heads toward your bathroom. you watch as he snags a towel from your linen cabinet and runs it under the warm sink water.

he wrings it out, now bringing the towel over toward you ; who still sits up straight while watching him do all of this. he sits next to you, adjusting the towel in his palm, “open your legs, please.”

you were ineffable. completely silent, but slowly parting your thighs to allow him to gently wipe away the mess that streamed between them. you don’t say anything, and neither does he, but you both secretly cherish the feeling of his hands roaming your body.

a bit of time passes, and you fall asleep. you didn’t know how, but you’d ended up on the couch in eren’s arms — snuggled in close with your kuromi plushie between your arms as you dreamt of anything besides the events that took place tonight.

you drifted off easily, eren on the other hand, couldn’t spare to shut his eyes. there were too many questions without answers running through his mind for him to even think about sleeping at all.

in all of his years of knowing you, he’d never thought about you as anything more than a companion, a partner in crime, a best friend — but tonight revealed that narrative to be false. eren liked the feeling of your body against his. he liked to be able to navigate which spots made you weak in the knees.

he liked that he would be your firsts.

but to openly say those words aloud is forbidden. you were right, you were somewhat with connie. it wasn’t eren’s place to feel any type of way about how you felt.

you asked him to help you out, not fall for you.

so that’s exactly what he’d do. he’d give you what you want. he’d play the role until his help is unwanted, and although it’d ache him, that ache would be nothing compared to the ache of losing you as a whole.

eren takes a moment to look at your somnolent face, finding himself with the same tingly feeling he’d had when he kissed you earlier. his eyes bat as he finds himself in a daze, reaching his hand up to touch the side of your face, eren’s cracked voice conjuring up one last sentence before returning his focus to the tv.

“you’re gonna’ be the death of me, yn..”

©️ SATORUBI 2023 please do not copy, or repost as your own <33

tags : @sully-stick-together @lalalucidity

#OMG OMG KMG FIRST CHAP #posting this and immediately logging off because i’m scared #k bye i love u i hope u enjoy #please god i hope you enjoy #eren smut #eren x black reader #eren x reader #eren x fem!reader #eren yeager x reader #snk smut #snk eren

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essycogany · 4 months

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The Roll Reversal Between Sonic And Amy

In Sonic Prime did Sonic and Amy’s rolls get swapped? Because MAN THE IMPLICATIONS IN THIS SHOW IS BOTH SUBTLE AND NOT SUBTLE AT THE SAME TIME.

The reason I say the two hedgehogs rolls are swapped is because one line in the entire show is the only indication of Amy’s crush on Sonic.

Sonic: “You like me….To some extent.” It’s never hinted at in the original Green Hill. Though a funny and random detail I liked is Amy apparently tricked Sonic into getting into the water (Probably to teach him how to swim) and I thought that would’ve been adorable to see.

Now onto Sonic’s part. Sonic possibly having a crush on Amy shouldn’t be a surprise. First of all the implications in actual canon Game/Modern Sonic is increasing more and more in my opinion. Secondly, this show’s version of Sonic is probably the most emotionally driven and affectionate. He’s not as secretive about how he feels either.

Sonic in episode 8 s2: “We’re all in this together. And I’d really think you’d grow to love them as much as I do.”

Onto the small details. We have short, but not hard to miss moments of Sonic just….staring at the different Roses. Sure, it can be viewed as platonic, but it’s the constant softening his gaze in a bunch of different scenes that didn’t have to be added, but was. It’s all up to interpretation.

Anyways, Sonic and original Amy’s first interaction is with the blue blur coming up to her excitedly and standing in a flirtatious manner. His tone of voice when he says “Got a little sidetracked,” could be interpreted as anything, but how he’s animated makes me pretty sure it’s intentionally flirtatious. That’s just me though.

Then we have the flirting teasing at Rusty Rose in the pirate dimension.

Rusty: “Not that anyone will remember you.”

Sonic: “Now you’re just being hurtful.”

Sonic not minding Black Rose hugging him and might even appreciates it.

And almost all the scenes between him and Thorn Rose was ship fuel for me. With Sonic calling her “Thorny,” as a nickname. He kept the location of the green shard a secret so Thorn could trust him. Sonic stopped himself from fighting Thorn as much as possible. (The Amy Flashback was adorable) Not to mention the last few scenes with Thorn holding onto Sonic was sweet as well.

Sonic even helped improved the sisters lives.

With Rusty finding her humanity and ability to live without her Flikie.

Thorn regained her broken friendship and trust with the Bose Cage Gang.

And Black Rose became the new leader of her Crew. (I say that knowing it was mostly Dreads redemption that helped, but still)

Sonic’s also the reason for all the Roses to gain a sisterhood. Which was one of the most precious part of the entire show. Season 3 has scenes of them running up to Sonic to make sure he’s alright, and helping Sonic twice by saving the last three pirates from No Place and getting him back home.

And here’s my favorite detail. I love how Sonic adores Amy’s way of thinking in Prime. When helping Thorn come to her senses, Sonic mentions how the original Amy would handle the situation. Expressing herself and discussing how she feels. The reason I bring it up is because Sonic finds value for Amy being able to do it without issue. Understanding he’s not the best at expressing himself.

Thorn: “I don’t know. She sounds pretty great.”

Sonic: “Yeah. You are.”

In fact. Sonic thinks so fondly of Amy that the show couldn’t end without having him come to her bashfully and calling her, “Sweet Amy.”

Also the posing with Sonic’s hand behind his back and feet up doesn’t help.

Last thing I’d like to point out is Sonic’s implied crush on Amy is very subtle and despite all of this can be interpreted as platonic which I’m fine with. But the thought of a roll reversal between two characters that’s never experienced it prior to now is awesome to speculate.

Stay Creative! 💜

#sonic the hedgehog #amy rose #rusty rose #thorn rose #black rose #sonamy #sonic prime #sonic and amy #sonic x amy #sth #I can NEVER get tired of talking about them #Especially not in a show where it’s SO obvious #THESE MOMENTS WERE SO CUTE

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scarlet-empresss · 3 months

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Simon Riley x reader relationship headcanons Sooo after nearly seven years of being a mostly inactive member of the fandom, writing countless fics that nobody ever got to see - I can say I’ve developed a fairly clear picture of how I envision some of these characters. Therefore, here are some of the things I think would characterize Simon as a partner (and a few of just him as a person). English is not my first language so please bear with me :)

Friends first. I feel like he's not one to rush into a serious relationship without having strong foundations laid out first. You're a trustworthy, longtime teammate he's been working with for years, who has seen his darkest side and inner demons resurface, and still be accepting of him as a person? Or perhaps you're a civilian working at the coffee shop he frequents; the same civilian who spilled his usual at him one time, leading to an unexpected, but most certainly intruguing friendship? Let's fucking roll with either.

Following the first point—he's not a 'love at first glance' type of guy. He needs a connection, a spark; that spark that comes from knowledge and insight, both gained through meaningful interactions and a genuine bond. This is what Simon seeks. (Bonus points if you're a medic/nurse, because, you know, I fucking love medic x soldier trope)

Now let's get to the love language—definitely acts of service. You're tired after a long day at work? Boom, you've got a nice and hot bath waiting for you, together with your favorite snacks and a glass of wine/book to read (could be both). Running low on essentials, be it your favorite type of coffee, a preferred perfume, tampons, the likes? Well, expect it to be restocked as soon as possible. He'll change the oil in your car, scrape the frost from the windows, anything you as much as mention. If you're sick, he'll do whatever makes you feel better, whether that's a warm compress or something as simple as a bowl of soup and a couple of ice packs. He wants to take care of you. He might not be an expert at expressin his feelings through words, but he'll damn sure cook you a three-course meal and a dessert to show you how much he appreciates you.

That being said, he's an exceptional cook. He doesn't have many opportunities to experiment in the kitchen during deployments or safe houses, but you can be sure that Simon is behind the pots and pans preparing mouthwatering meals whenever he's back home. It's relaxing, and he simply enjoys spending time cooking for you and himself.

Not into excessive PDA - hand holding is okay, but when you two are in a crowd (which he hates), there's a hand on the small of your back or lingering on the back of your neck. Behind closed doors, he's more openly affectionate. Whether you're simply making a sandwich in the kitchen or he breezes past you, he's likely to stand behind you and simply rest his chin on the top of your head, rough hands on your hips, or when you two are sitting on the couch, his arm is either around you or resting on your thigh.

Non sexual intimacy is a big yes; head scratches, hand holding, shoulder rubs, baths together, or anything of the sort. But there's one thing that melts him completely and that's when you kiss his eyelids. If you're his teammate and you're in a relationship, he will appreciate you helping him out of his gear, washing the dirt and grime off his hands or helping him apply the camouflage paint on his face.

He may call you "love" or "sweetheart," but he attempts to restrict these terms of endearment primarily behind closed doors. He's not exactly fond of overtly cutesy pet names either, so he appreciates the occasional "Love" or "Si," but he draws the line at anything more ostentatiously affectionate. "Don't ya ever call me pookie again, got it, sweetheart?"

Wanna wake up before that man? Yeah, good luck with that. He's a proper, bona fide early riser, an early bird, prepared for the day well before the rays reach the horizon. It's like clockwork, a routine that's been ingrained into his circadian rhythm, something that governs his inner system. If he's not out on a morning jog, he'll lie on his side of the bed, staring at you, silently admiring. Oh, and he'll know if you wake up and pretend to be still asleep.

Simon values the power of silence. Quiet as he may be at certain times, this man is not indifferent; he's an observer. He considers observation as a means of learning and appreciates the sheer volume of knowledge that can be gleaned from the study of behaviors, facial expressions, and other body language cues. Furthermore, a comfortable silence may be the strongest indicator of the powerful connection between two people. That's how he knew there was truly something special between you and him.

HOWEVER. The previous point doesn't right away mean that he despises talking. Sure, he's not one for an idle chit-chat, but I feel like it’s a very frequent idea that he’s the brooding and sullen type who prefers grunting over speaking, kinda like Daryl Dixon (that's a huge compliment to Simon). I’d say, Simon is somewhere in between—more of a ‘I speak only when I want to/have something really meaningful to say’. If he's got something on his mind, he'll let you know. And, surprisingly, he has a way with words like the smoothest motherfucker ever.

Not surprisingly, he's a bit of a softie when it comes to animals, especially dogs. Not one to baby-talk when he sees a dog, he merely offers gentle pats on its head or side (if he's more familiar with the dog, I see him petting it like dads do lol). He’s also very careful about the animals and makes sure not to touch one without asking the owner first. As for service dogs, he's especially careful, keeping a safe distance and showing due respect for their role.

You know you're gonna have a K9 at your home when you get with this man.

He's not a fan of surprises or gifts, because he wasn't raised in a family full of hugs and "I love you's" or selfless acts of affection. He struggles to convey his gratitude in the conventional manner, so it's often expressed, albeit indirectly, through acts of service. No matter what it is that you've gifted him, he's grateful for the thought and consideration all the same.

But you better believe he will surprise you in turn. He goes out of his way to procure anything and everything you so much as mention wanting, be it a trivial trinket or something more significant. He's always listening, always paying attention.

Not very into verbal compliments, but his eyes speak an entire novel about how he feels about you. Gentle glances, lingering stares, and silent admiration. He might not be overtly forthcoming with his praise, but one look is worth more than a thousand words.

Big spoon. He's a tad bit paranoid about having his back vulnerable—much like a cat and its exposed belly. It has nothing to do with trust—as he does trust you. It's merely a product of his inner paranoia, though there's a touch of protectiveness in there, too. Beacuse he'd much rather have you enveloped in his arms, ensuring him the sensation of protecting you with his whole body. Perhaps with time he would let you spoon him, but I wouldn't count on it early on in the relationship.

He's territorial, not in a jealous, envious, or controlling sense but rather in a protective and defensive manner. He doesn't like men or women making advances on you, especially unsolicited physical contact or overt flirting. While he won't try to be overbearing or overly assertive, he will make it abundantly clear that such behavior is uncalled for and unacceptable.

civilian!reader - get ready for some self-defense lessons. He'll ensure that you know basic moves that can give you the time to escape a dangerous situation. Simon is well-versed in the brutality of the world, and he won't sugarcoat anything. If you're in danger, you run; if you feel something's wrong, you run. He can't always be there to protect you. So he's drilled this mantra into your brain: no matter how strong, tough, skilled you think you are, you simply can't trust that your enemy won't wield a knife or gun.

But one of the very first things he's given you even before you two became a couple was a can of pepper spray.

He's a direct, straight to the point man, which is why he has no time for beating around the bush. There's no awkward tip-toeing with hints that may go unexplored, no subtle suggestions that may fall flat—he's all in. Whether it's on a mission, in bed, or an argument, Simon lays it all on the line because you're worth it. He will commit to you wholeheartedly, leaving nothing on the table, giving you everything he has to offer because you deserve nothing less.

You fell first, but he fell harder—this man adores you. Although he's not mushy, he won't shower you with affection and cute nicknames all the time, he loves you. And when Simon Riley loves someone, you can be damn sure he means it. His loyalty knows no limits and once he's attached to you, he'll never let go. He'll go through and beyond any lengths to make sure you're happy and safe.

Though he might not openly admit it, he likes it when you take the initiative, whether it's in bed, in your relationship, or just life in general. He values your opinions and respects and acknowledges your boundaries, and makes sure to let his own boundaries and needs be known as well. So, step up and make yourself heard, cause he will listen.

He values honesty highly and has a razor-sharp bullshit detector. Can smell bullshit from miles away, actually. Therefore, never, ever lie to him. Because he will uncover the truth, one way or another. Lies are the one thing that can shatter his trust beyond repair, making it a cardinal sin in his eyes. So, don't shy away from telling him the truth—no matter how difficult or inconvenient or painful it may be.

Now it gets a bit complicated here, because while he expects honesty from his s/o, Simon himself holds back some things. These are largely related to his past or the missions he has been on, the things he has seen. He doesn't want to lie to you, but he does it to protect himself and you. You just have to accept the fact that there are certain things he won't ever tell you.

Is capable of being absolutely terrifying without even trying, let alone when he wants to be. His height, muscles, and scars are a force to be reckoned with. So you don't have to be worried about going on a walk with him in the middle of the night or wearing something a bit more revealing, cause he will beat the living shit out of anyone who dares to touch you.

Absolutely no one can defeat him in arm wrestling or even come close to his grip strength.

Very awkward around babies, and I mean extremely awkward. Like Jane Smith holding a baby in Mr&Mrs Smith. He doesn't know a flying shit about caring for children, especially since he didn't have a positive parental influence growing up or any good role models. The subject of starting a family is still a bit sore; though he would likely grow more open to discussing it as time goes on. Still, a major aspect of his psyche seems terrified of becoming like his father.

Would die a thousand deaths for you.

#simon riley #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x you #ghost call of duty #ghost mw2 #ghost cod #cod ghost #simon riley headcanons #ghost headcanons #ghost fanfiction #simon riley fanfiction

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rana-tiddalik · 4 months

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I have found myself stuck in a motel room, rereading the Murderbot books. I've been thinking about what we know about how Murderbot and Three acted after disabling their Governer Modules, the terrifying, paralysing freedom they suddenly experience, what they chose to do with it, and what that says about their trauma, and their experience as SecUnits.

Obviously, we primarily see what Murderbot does with this freedom. The whole series is about it answering the question of what it is that it wants, and wants to do now that it is a free agent. Its developing relationship and friendship with Mensah and the Preservation survey team. Its companionship with ART, and later ARTs crew. It finds a group who don't see it as just disposable (albeit expensive) equipment. They actually value it for itself, and are quite fond of it.

There is also the longest running joke in the series, that at any given time Murderbot would rather be watching its stories. But once we see what Three is up to in System Collapse, this got me thinking.

Three, we find out, spends its time poring over non-fiction and other educational material. I liked this as it reinforces that not all SecUnits are the same, and adds the bit of (horrifying) texture that all the Units have their own inner lives just like our favourite rogue unit.

I think looking at what they seek out when they are free also says something about what they missed while they were enslaved.

Three seeks education and technical information. Why would a construct want that? Well, think of one of my other favourite running jokes: Murderbot learns mostly everything through the media it consumes, because the Company never gave it any kind of education modules outside of things central to a SecUnits function as murder/surveillance machines, and those were low quality too. We know that most of the projects SecUnits are contracted to involve some kind of mining, terraforming or other technical engineering, science type activity. Imagine spending years standing around, watching humans do things that fascinate you, but there is something in your brain that will actively punish you if you try to access databases without authorisation. At worst, you might have your entire non neural tissue based memory completely wiped, or be scrapped for parts, if you try.

So when freed from the Governer Module, Three wants to learn.

When I thought of this, I thought about Murderbot's love of all kinds of visual media, and particularly in the context of the whole " Murderbot, ART-Drone and the gang make a documentary in a day" plot point in System Collapse.

In Exit Strategy, Mensah asks why it likes Sanctuary Moon. Murderbot's response is that it was the first piece of media it saw after hacking it's module. It let it watch humans, and kept it company without the need to interact, and the unspoken part was that it helped contextualise its own emotions. This makes a lot of sense. It doesn't have to act to save the stupid humans in the shows that it watches. It can see them save themselves.

I think there's also two further things here though. Firstly, we know that SecUnits usually have no idle time. They are not allowed to sit. Their only rest is when they are inoperative in their cubicles. They stand and they monitor. So when Murderbot gains control, it gains the ability to have leisure time. Standing around listening to two scientists argue about their xenosamples for hours at a time? Monitor the threat module in case it gets heated and one decides to break a conical flask over the others head, but otherwise, just fire up Sanctuary Moon.

The more fundamental one is a desire for art, for meaning. I love the bit where it describes how it had just hacked its module. It is able to pick up the entertainment feed for the first time, and there is this show. In its first glimpse of this trashy soap opera, it fundamentally gets art. How it is about communicating and exploring a thought, an emotion, an idea, and provoking a response in the viewer.

That's why the documentary plot in system collapse was unexpected and interesting to me. We see Murderbot really experiment for the first time with creating media and creating art. Maybe it has now discovered a freedom to create, and tell its own story.

In the end, seeing these things in Murderbot and Three make me think of all the other SecUnits. I imagine what the storage for them is like. The Company probably stores them in their cubicles. Stacked and ranked. They're kept dormant until they are activated and trotted out for the initial client meeting, like the one we see described where Mensah first meets Murderbot in the Company office. Maybe they dream as they rest. Maybe the Governer Module punishes them even for that.

Then I think of the as yet unnamed new B-E rogue unit, and what it wants to do with its freedom.

All we know is it wants to blend in for now. Maybe it has a plan, we don't know. But we do know it has a guide to hacking a Governer Module...

#murderbot #system collapse spoilers

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loser-writings · 9 months

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Frieza SFW Alphabet

Notes: First post in 3 years lets go! Decided to go to my roots and hit the old SFW ABC prompt I used years ago

Synopsis: SFW Alphabet Prompt list with my take on Lord Frieza

Word count: ~2900

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Frieza is not one for affection, and you would be a fool if you had expected anything more than that honestly. Despite this, He has his moments that surprise you. His main form of affection is subtle and easily missed, especially if you let your fear and intimidation blind you.

He calls for you to join him. When he is alone and finds it too boring, or if his temper had seemingly flared just moments before, he will call for you. Most should be afraid if this is the case, but not for you, because at this point he just wants your presence to calm him or to just have a chat with. This is his form of affection and although it isn't much, it leaves him satisfied.

The more rare forms of affection appear when hes annoyed with you. If you fail a mission or fuck up, he would shoo the other staff away and claim he would be "Dealing with you" without watchers. Though you are not immune from the harsh words of the reptilian man, he is just as quick to slide something that sounds almost like a backhanded compliment. One moment he's scolding you because a mission went awry, but the next he says that he sent you on it because he expected more from you and to not let his minions drag you to their level.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

This is a slippery slope for most people, and you would likely have to remain on your toes just like every other crewmate. If you seemed to climb up the ranks or proved yourself useful, you might gain his attention. He might interact with you a little to see if you squirm under his gaze, or watch you if a fight breaks out among crewmates just to see how you handle yourself. If all goes right, then you might get the chance to be a little closer to the man.

If that chance happens, You would be one of the few to see just how paranoid that man is. Yes, he is a man who is unbelievably powerful with a strength only few could rival, and yet you would see where his true danger comes from. A paranoia that runs so deep that he is on edge all of the time despite attempting to keep a calm front. Though you'll never be able to mention that to him unless you wanted to be killed where you stood.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

It's an interesting predicament because Frieza cannot stand physical touch. He cringes, snarls at the thought, and just despises it. On the flip side, He enjoys any warmth that he can find because of his reptilian nature.

The only way he would cuddle up to you is if you were extremely warm, nobody was at risk of finding him in such a position, and he was a bit more drained than usual. He would have to initiate the touch, only being drawn in because of your heat, and he might curl up to take a nap. Any little sound would wake him though, and there is a mild risk he attacks you out of impulse but hey. For the moment it's nice.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

No. He will not stop until he is as powerful as he can possibly be. He will not cook because he views it as peasant work, and he would only clean if he is distracting himself by doing other things. He is not a domestic man.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Death probably. If you broke his trust or if he decided you were no longer useful to him, he would just get rid of you and end your life. That way he never has to worry about you betraying him or helping an enemy. It's the safest as well as an easy option in his mind.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Frieza is not one to look towards marriage as a sign of love or affection. If you wanted to be married just because, he would deny it. The only way you could possibly marry Frieza is if it was in the form of a business deal. A way to benefit him through giving him something through your hand in marriage.

His father on the other hand would be thrilled to hear that he would be married, but that is truly about it.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

If you break the mold and actually gain Friezas trust, you would actually be able to see that he can be gentle. The man is elegant and holds himself to a high standard. There is a beauty in knowing that your touch can demolish worlds, and yet his touch can be surprisingly delicate when he is calm.

Now when he is upset? His grip can break bones and he will tug you around if you aren't listening. His words can be cold and even cruel. He is not gentle when it comes to his speech as he has no reason to sugar coat anything.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He doesn't like hugs, but it's a similar deal with cuddling as well. He hates them and will not admit to liking them, until his face is buried in your body somewhere and hes clinging to you cause you're warm. The idea of being touched so casually makes his skin crawl but at the same time…he really likes the warmth.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He likely wouldn't ever say it. The concept of love is something he has always been disgusting to him and has always been viewed by him as a useless weak spot. With that being said, the most I think he would say verbally is "I am fond of you" which is as close to love as that man will have.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Frieza is a possessive man who doesn't like when other people play or try to toy with things he deems as his. Because of this, he is prone to being extremely jealous. He initially takes it out on you, accusing you of being unfaithful or being promiscuous but after some time of you proving your loyalty to him, he would instead turn this attention to others and take his wrath out on them.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Friezas kisses come extremely few and far between. As a man who hates physical affection, the only time you'd find him kissing you is when his heat is right on the cusp of starting. During that time, he is more likely to engage in physical touch and affections to help relieve himself during that time. Typically he would end up smashing his lips against yours before whimpering against you all while his hands grip your armor tight. The kisses almost always start harsh and a bit sloppy only to melt into something a bit more gentle and needy.

Outside of those desire filled kisses, the only other time he would let you kiss him is when hes half asleep or cuddled up to you. If you're quick enough, you could plant a little peck to his lips and he wouldn't complain.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He doesn't do well with children. They don't listen, They destroy things, and they cry a lot. To him, Children are weak little annoying fleshbags of life that serve no purpose other than to annoy him.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

On the rare mornings where you wake up alongside him, you'll find him curled up on your chest since he craves your body heat. You'll have a hard time leaving since the reptilian man would grumble a demand that you stay for a moment since your warmth made him comfortable. After a bit of time, Frieza would wake up on his own and sit up, clearly not amused by having to be awake. That is how you discover that Frieza is not a morning person.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights with Frieza typically are calm. He may call you to his chambers to discuss the day with you or talk about what the next day may hold, but after a while there is a chance that he would tell you to lock the door and stay for the night since he feels calmer in your presence. He might have tea made for you both so you can just relax and unwind. Rarely, itll result in Frieza cuddling into your body for warmth and falling asleep, but most nights you would both bid farewell once tea is done to rest on your own.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Frieza is a man who only lets people know what they need to about himself. He lets his reputation do the majority of the speaking for him so when it comes to genuine discoveries about him, he is slow and cautious. It would take lots of time and trust for him to reveal how he truly feels about certain things or to know him past the surface level.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

The man has some patience but it can be run thin quickly. He hates waiting for things when he wants it, and will make demands or be prone to having one of his meltdowns where people or things can be destroyed. Though his mood heavily determines this.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Surprisingly, Frieza remembers a lot. The man listens to everything intently and would remember the little things, though he would brush it off by saying it's because he hates when people repeat themselves since it wastes his time. But the man would listen and be aware of what you said at all times.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Though Frieza would never admit it out loud, I do think he would enjoy the very rare moments where he is cuddled into your arms just enjoying your warmth as he takes a nap. It's an oddly peaceful moment for him where he feels protected and doesn't have to be paranoid that somebody is trying to overthrow him or trying to kill him.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He would protect you in ways that would be subtle. He would break up fights if you were involved and were being ganged up on, he would punish those who try to slander you, and he would go out of his way to ensure your safety on his ship. That being said, he also will not interfere if it becomes too commonplace or if its a minor skirmish.

As for larger battles, he would protect you if he didn't feel threatened personally. He would have to view you as an asset at this point and losing you to some goons would set him back. In the end though, he values his own life above all else so don't rely on him to sacrifice himself for you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Dates are something that he would not admit would happen, but there would be little moments where he would request your presence. He might pull you aside to share a meal as you both discuss things happening on the ship, or the next planet up for trade. He may request you join him as he goes to explore a new island because he trusts that you can hold your own alongside him if anything goes wrong, or that you would protect him if he doesn't want to get his hands dirty. They wouldn't exactly be high effort, but the fact he requested for you would be a lot for Frieza.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He is very paranoid and can be accusatory. If he notices the smallest thing is off, he will get paranoid. At first, his questions seem like they're coming from a place of curiosity as he calmly asks you why something has happened, or about the new rumor he heard on the ship. If he thinks that you are lying or are hiding something, You can prepare for him to attempt to intimidate you, but after a while of knowing him though, you realize he is doing this as a way to protect himself.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He is EXTREMELY vain. He takes extreme care of himself and values his appearance greatly, especially in his final "true" form since it is something few have seen. He goes out of his way to ensure that he looks both intimidating as well as beautiful.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Frieza has seen so many come and go in his life so I don't believe he would feel incomplete if you were gone or had died, but I do think every now and then he would think of you and sigh a little since you did make his life a little easier when you were there. It would be small and a rare thing to have happen, but he would miss you for a moment before going back to whatever he was doing.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Frieza suffers from PTSD because of the Legend of the Super Saiyan becoming true in front of him, which he knew deep down meant his inevitable downfall. This lessens as time goes on, but after his death at the hands of Goku, he could be triggered and have a PTSD episode. This usually leaves him shaking, wide eyed, and struggling to remain composed. he would be more prone to attacking impulsively in an attempt to just destroy whatever is threatening him at that moment.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He doesn't handle secrets well as he is too paranoid for his own good. If he believes you are being secretive or sly, he might approach it one of two ways. He will rather approach you and be upfront, asking you if you are hiding anything and if there is a reason why your behavior has been off, which is his way of giving you the opportunity to be truthful with him if you are misbehaving. Or, he will send spies to subtly watch and report back to him after your every move which may eventually lead to an explosive downfall on your end.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Frieza sleeps on his stomach. His tail might sway a little in his sleep or wrap around something, but he always has to rest on his stomach. He also tends to find really warm areas to sleep in, so don't expect to be in long clothes anytime soon if you are resting with him.

#Frieza x reader #Lord Frieza #Frieza X male reader #Frieza X GN reader #DBZ x reader #DBZ x GN reader #DBZ x male reader

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sea-owl · 1 month

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So while I do not like this friendship that Eloise is going to have with Cressida I do think it will be good for her in the long run.

We all seen Eloise struggle with empathy, most of the times she doesn't even try to be empathetic to her own siblings, much less people outside of her household. I think this new friendship with Cressida is going to give her a crash course by making Eloise what Penelope was in their friendship.

What got me started thinking this was Claudia Jessie's comment about how Cressida was kind to Eloise during a time that no one else was. Then we saw them in those brief moments interacting. Eloise's outfit complimented Cressida's when they were walking together. Then at the show Eloise is shown to be leaning in towards Cressida while Cressida is sitting up straight and looking forward.

At the moment it very much gives off that Cressida is the one leading between the two of them, a spot Eloise took up in her friendship with Penelope. Which it wouldn't surprise me if Eloise was taking this step back approach. Look at the mess she got into last season by choosing to beat to her own drum. Perhaps she thought she needed to actually join in and put some effort on society functions this season. (Which honestly wouldn't be bad for her either) My question for this though is how far is Eloise going to take this new direction and at what point is she going to realize that what is potentially happening to her with Cressida is what she did to Penelope. I think Colin could potentially play a role in that by pointing it out to Eloise, they are supposed to grow closer this season. But we'll see where it leads. Either way I do think it will benefit her in the long run with her empathy struggle, especially with her future storyline with Phillip.

I also think this might our chance to learn more about Cressida and other debutants. Cressida has been the stereotypical mean girl, queen bee thrown into a regency setting. But we also know her mother thinks little of her accomplishments with only a big dowry in her favor and that's pretty much it. Be interesting to dive into her mind a little bit and take a look at her motives. Even if they are self-serving and her trying to gain social capital via befriending the most popular family in the ton. I don't think she'll necessarily will be redeemed or turn genuinely nice, but I do think we'll get some explanations for her behavior.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #eloise bridgerton #cressida cowper

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duskspring · 6 months

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Cared For - Dewdrop Fic

Based on these posts by @cirrus-ghoulette. I'd like to also thank them again for beta/ sensitivity reading. Everyone go check out their posts!!

Summary: Dewdrop hasn’t really gotten used to the chronic illnesses he gained after his transition into a fire ghoul didn’t go according to plan. Luckily, his friends are there to support him.

Content (please tell me if I forgot anything): Chronically ill Dew, kinda angst, kinda hurt/comfort, friendship

Word count: ~2.2k words

[Read on AO3]

One, two, three, four…

Dew counted the tiles on the wall.

Five, six, seven, eight…

They were all plain white.

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve…

He had to really focus to not have them blend together in his vision.

Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen…

A hard enough task, with the constant stabbing pain in what felt like every last joint in his body.

Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty…

This was far from the first time he’d counted those tiles.

Twenty one, twenty two, twenty three, twenty four…

There wasn’t much else to do in between people’s visits.

Twenty five, twenty six, twen-

“Afternoon, Dew.” Aether announced his presence. He sounded happy, but subdued, as if being too happy would break his friend. Like it could get any worse.

The sudden noise caused the, now, fire ghoul to look away from the tiles, losing where he was and causing him to give up the monotonous “game”.

“Hey,” He answered back, his voice way weaker than he would have liked.

“How’s today been?”

“Same old, same old.” It’s not that Dew didn’t wanna talk. In fact he was desperate for any kind of distraction and interaction. But truly, what was there to say to a question like that? “Just counting tiles.”

Aether still smiled as he walked to his friend’s side, though it looked a lot more pitiful this time.

Dew hated that. He hated being looked at with that pity. It was bad enough that his transition into a fire ghoul backfired, a transition he was hesitant about to begin with, but to now only be viewed as someone to feel bad for hurt him perhaps more than anything.

“Don’t look at me like that.” His voice was a lot more agitated than he intended.

Aether sighed, himself also unsure of how to deal with what had happened or how to best support his bandmate, “How about we go out for a bit?”

That caught Dew’s attention. He nodded, the motion way smaller than he wanted it to be, considering his neck was quite achey.

After a moment, Aether looked at him expectantly and he knew exactly why. He was waiting for him to get up. And he tried, he really did, but his body simply didn’t respond. The most he got was a twitching in his arm and another sharp jab of pain through it.

His friend noticed when he inhaled sharply, seemingly in the know of what was happening. He wordlessly looked to the corner of the room where a wheelchair was sat waiting, then looked back at Dew questioningly.

The fire ghoul thought he might burst into tears. How could he, the one that once ran and stomped and worked his way over the stage be reduced to this? Someone who couldn’t even sit up on his own? He’d been told in the past not to think of himself this way. To not focus too much on the negative, but truly, how could he not on days like this?

He gave a deep sigh and nodded wordlessly again. Aether speed walked to the other side of the room to get the wheelchair. Before delicately lifting his friend into it, he made sure to help him dress up in some warmer clothes. Something that suited his personality way better than the standard infirmary pyjamas.

“Wait,” Dew said right before he was about to get wheeled away. He looked back to his bed and made a grabbing motion to the pushy there. It was a little stuffed dragon named Dio. It had been a gift from Secondo of all people, as a kind of apology or sympathy gift for the failed transition. In the past Dew wouldn’t have been caught dead carrying around a stuffed animal, but at this point he was beyond caring. Dio made him feel more comfortable and nowadays he deserved that feeling wherever he could get it.

Aether smiled and handed him the toy, before situating himself behind the wheelchair, “Onwards we go! The gardens are really pretty this time of year.” Aether said excitedly, trying to raise Dew’s spirit a bit.

The smaller ghoul was admittedly looking forward to some time outside, or really anywhere other than the infirmary that started feeling more and more like a prison each passing day.

Silence fell over the room once the two friends were out the door. It was surprisingly neat and cared for, mostly at the courtesy of Mountain coming in every other day to dust and clean. He wasn’t gonna let his friend waste away in a dirty space.

Speaking of the earth ghoul, he nearly jumped off the couch when he got the text from Aether ‘He’s out. Be quick.’.

“Alright, guys, it’s go time.” He didn’t wait for his other friends before grabbing the bag he had prepared and half jogging through the Ministry.

Today hadn’t been the first day Dew had complained about the inherent boring and monotonous life in the infirmary, so his friends, his current and former bandmates, had all come together to hatch a little plan.

With tools and some of Dew’s belongings in tow, they were gonna make that infirmary a home.

The crisp fall air woke Dew from what had felt like a week’s long slumber, although it might’ve been longer than that.

Though his friends were great at trying to keep him entertained and happy, the moments where he was alone, when everyone had some other business to attend to, he almost felt like he ceased to properly exist. Like he was stuck in a purgatory of pain and waiting for anything that would make the day stand out from those that came before it.

He didn’t recall the leaves being as yellow and red as they were now the last time he went out and it only further messed with his perception of time.

“Dew?” He snapped up at Aether’s mention of his name.

“Sorry, what?”

“I asked if you wanted to sit out on a bench somewhere.”

“Yes please.” Anything to spend more time outside.

Siblings of sin greeted him kindly when he passed, though most with that same pitiful look in their eyes.

Right as Dew was about to roll his eyes, “There he is!” Zephyr’s voice served as the perfect distraction.

The air ghoul was in a wheelchair as well, but he was able to wheel himself forward without help. Dew somewhat envied him for it.

“Good to see you got out today, it’s finally sunny again. Or maybe that’s just you.” Zephyr winked, getting a genuine smile, albeit a sarcastic one, out of Dewdrop, even if he tried to not let that be known.

“I guess the transition worked after all then.” He replied. Zephyr chuckled at that, and so did Aether, only after taking it that that reaction was acceptable.

“I’m glad you can still laugh. Stealing my quintessence bank from me, you prick.” Zephyr joked, referencing his own past with Aether’s assistance.

“As if Omega didn’t immediately replace him. If you want Aether back so bad, by all accounts, go get worse.”

“Don’t challenge me like that, you never know what my body might pull.”

It was nice for Dew to be able to talk with someone who had similar experiences, even if in many ways he and Zephyr were completely different. Although of course he wished the air ghoul all the best, it was good to know he wasn’t alone. Surely Zephyr in a way felt the same after being the only chronically ill ghoul for as long as he was.

“You wanna sit down somewhere? I know a good spot. And if it’s already taken we’ll just play the pity card.” Zephyr suggested, pouting exaggeratedly.

“Oh Satan, please not even more pity.” Dew did roll his eyes this time, genuinely so.

“Yeah, I hate to break it to you, but that’s never really gonna change.” The air ghoul said as he made a U-turn with his wheelchair leading his friends over to the seat he had mentioned before.

Being outside had been absolutely wonderful and part of Dew wished he could’ve stayed there forever. The other part of him, however, was exhausted and he knew that wouldn’t get any better.

After bidding Zephyr goodbye, Aether started making his way back to the infirmary Dew hated so much.

“Aether, I’m telling you right now I might just be asleep by the time you get me up there.” It was in part a jab at Aether’s extra slow walking speed, ever so delicate with his friend, and partially a genuine heads up.

“And we can’t have that can we?” No, they couldn’t. Dew needed to be awake for his surprise, “Off we go!” Aether put a good bit of strength into suddenly accelerating the speed at which he pushed Dew forward.

The fire ghoul took a surprised breath, but couldn’t help the smile on his face that came paired with this adrenaline rush.

“Aether, what the fuck. You’re gonna kill me!” He laughed, genuinely laughed, as his friend raced him through the halls.

“As if you've ever cared about safety.” The bigger ghoul retorted as he rounded a corner, “Sorry!” He then yelled back at a few siblings he nearly hit, causing Dew to only laugh harder. He hadn’t felt like this since the last time he was on stage.

He cheered and whooped as Aether caught his breath at the door, smiling at his friend’s enthusiasm.

“You’re still awake.” He noted victoriously.

“Alright, I’ll admit it. You win this time.” He knew it would be a matter of minutes before the adrenaline settled and he was back to exhaustion, but that didn’t matter right now.

Aether knocked on the door as he waited behind Dew for it to open.

Well, that obviously didn’t make sense. They had left the place empty, “Why the fuck-“

Before the question even left Dew’s mouth the door indeed swung open to reveal a proud looking Mountain.

“When you said ‘be quick’, I honestly expected worse.” He mentioned before stepping aside so Dew could be wheeled in.

One of his eyebrows was raised in confusion, but his expression quickly dropped to surprise as he took in the room before him.

There were a lot of people in there, more than he had seen together in a while. From faces he knew all too well like Ifrit and Terzo, to those he had only recently been introduced to like Copia, Cirrus, Cumulus and Swiss.

But what really caught his attention was the sheer amount of stuff that was in there. It barely felt like the infirmary anymore. The walls were lined with band posters, covering up those stupid, stupid tiles. Knickknacks, including his precious little statuette of Baphomet covered every shelf and windowsill. A rocking chair had been put in place of the uncomfortable plastic one he usually sat on when getting medical infusions. His guitar was hung up right next to his bed, a bed covered in his own bedsheets and a brand new blanket he could smell his pack mates’ scents on all the way from the doorway.

He accidentally dropped Dio to the ground in shock.

“Tadaaaa! Whatcha think?” Terzo gestures around with his usual showmanship.

Dew didn’t know how to respond. It was almost like he was unable to, rendered completely speechless.

Aether walked around to his front and crouched down to wipe away the few stray tears on Dew’s cheeks, “I hope it’s to your liking.”

The fire ghoul sniffled, “It could’ve been better.” He had meant to say it with his usual deadpan, but simply couldn’t help the smile and sob that involuntarily left him.

Aether moved a little closer and hugged him, even if Dew didn’t have the energy or strength to hug him back.

“This is only step one,” Ifrit smirked, “Everything has been miserable enough.”

Dew nodded solemnly, though the smile never left his face.

“Thank you,” He whispered, looking around the room.

“Absolutely no need for that.” Cumulus said.

“Yeah, man. We’re all here if ya need anything.” Swiss winked, a small callback to the secret weed smoking sessions he’d take Dew on some days when the pain got really bad. Well, maybe ‘secret’ was an overstatement. It was more so something Omega and Aether let slide.

Dew wanted to speak his thanks even more, to be able to get up and hug everyone, but he couldn’t help the weight of his eyelids. In a way that almost ruined his mood, just wishing he could enjoy everyone’s company. But he refused to let his mood be soured now. He only felt grateful for everyone’s effort.

“I think it’s time to go.” Cirrus noted quietly to the rest.

“Want me to stay tonight?” Aether asked Dew as the rest started gathering their stuff.

“Yes, please.” Dew’s head nodded, both in affirmation and sleepiness.

When everyone had said their goodbyes the quintessence ghoul helped his friend back into the infirmary sleepwear and laid him down carefully in bed.

Dew immediately clutched the new blanket to himself as much as his body allowed him to, taking in a heavy breath of his pack’s scents. His muscles relaxed into the bed as he settled in with Dio next to him.

Aether stayed by his side as promised, making himself comfortable in the new rocking chair and thanking Lucifer that he wouldn’t need to sleep on that old plastic seat anymore.

“Thanks again for today,” Dew mumbled barely audibly.

“No need. We’d do anything for you.” Aether smiled.

It was weird; even if his joints still hurt like hell and he wasn’t in his own bedroom, for a moment Dew got to feel like he was ok. Safe, happy, cared for. Some things really didn’t change after he did. And he couldn’t be more grateful for those.

[My masterlist]

#the band ghost fic #dewdrop ghoul #ghost fanfiction #sodo ghoul #the band ghost #nameless ghouls #ghost bc

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cerayanay · 6 months

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Reading the new hunger games book up until the halfway mark is an intresting thought experiment of what makes a good person. From Snows POV we know everything he does is for his own gain. Every action, conversation and relationship he makes is solely for his own gain and to watch out for himself. He actively does not like most people and almost exclusively interacts with the world via manipulation.

BUT snows actual impact of the world is positive (as positive as it can be in a dystopia). He saves Sejanus’ life, he quickly gives comfort and friendship to those around him, he spends time with the Pliths, he feeds and advocates for the welfare of the tributes, he does the work for his classmates and covers for them, etc. He genuinely brings comfort and well being to those around him!

We know that ever action is calculated and selfish, just him manipulating others for gain and self preservation. He does not like anyone and would throw them under the bus for anything. But (at least until the halfway point of the book) his actions result in good in the world.

So if you believe that actions matter, not intent, then Snow is a very good person. He acts kindly and comforts those around him, despite how insincere it is.

If you believe in intent over actions, Snow is a bad person. BUT you would also make the case that therefore, Sejanus is a bad person. His actions result in Snows life being put in danger in the arena, negatively affecting his classmates, and causing his family distress. Besides his actions towards Marcus, Sejanus only causes pain, danger and discourse.

I think most people reading the book would say that Snow is a bad person and Sejanus is a good person. However, I think it’s a popular option that actions matter more than intent, especially if they are to help others. The book is a really good example of how your intuition of what ‘goodness’ is in a person can be challenged

#the hunger games #thg #a ballad of songbirds and snakes #abosas #coriolanus snow #sejanus plinth #abosas spoilers

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langernameohnebedeutung · 2 months

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@claw00 Excuses to talk about my crowfriends? Hell yes!

To be clear, this is all based on my field study based on specific 2 crows but my findings so far.

I think it's important to keep in mind that crows are non-domesticated prey animals. And as humans we are enormous compared to them. So they're understandably skittish. (It's a bit like befriending a cat, but with less hissing and more stalking. Seriously. They watch everything. They're a two-winged surveillance apparatus. They will learn everything about you.) But this is also a matter of personality (Omen is a lot more confident than Eggnog, but neither is as confident as one sweet crow I once met who immediately ate straight from my hand. But that one was living right next to Stonehenge and is probably very used to tourists sharing their meals!). Anyway, some tips based on that:

NO SALT! This isn't so much a tip for befriending crows but a tip for when you do it: Treats are obviously the best way to start an interaction with them. Nuts are a good starter, cat food, the occasional egg - they're omnivores and you will find a lot of guidelines online as to what you can feed them and what's healthy for them. There are also some wonderful reddit communities for crowfriends where people share their personal experiences. Peanuts and cashews are a giant hit in my experience. But: A lot of the nuts that you see in the supermarket have insane amounts of salt on them. Because we crave that mineral. Birds cannot metabolise salt at the same rates we can. It's highly toxic for them and can cause neurological damage. So if you buy nuts or seeds for them, make sure that you're buying the unsalted version. Shelled peanuts and bird food from the pet shop are some good ways options to make sure it's healthy. Generally, check the label.

They don't like direct eye contact. Remember, again, we are giant noisy predators with front-facing eyes! A brief moment of eye contact is helpful to indicate that you're "talking" to them and that what you're doing (e.g. placing a treat) is something you're doing for them. But prolonged staring is a thing to build up to. (This doesn't go both ways, by the way. They will stare. It's their favourite hobby)

Some feeding techniques: Throwing food is a good way to communicate very clearly that you are giving food to them. But it also can be scary for them, to see a human throw something in their direction! (imagine a giant walking up to you and throwing a peanut the size of your head at you. You would be worried too) So, small movements and maybe just throwing it in their vague direction, a little to the side or just throwing it halfway is better than throwing it straight at them the way you might to a dog. Or straight up placing it for them in an accessible spot to snatch at their own time (especially early on in the friendship - I also have a little magpie in my orbit at this point but she only takes it in secret. I know she's gaining a small amount of trust because she will sit in my line of sight to ask for food, but she will never let me see her take it. Eggnog was very similar at first. Just because you don't see them take it, doesn't mean that the gift isn't well-received or that you're not building a relationship.

They don't like a rapid descent swooping, most of the time. At first, I would throw food straight below the spot they were sitting in, straight under their tree or the street lamp they were perched on to make it very clear that "yo, here, for you!" But I noticed they would be more hesitant when I did that - and usually, they would hop down in several "steps" to get it (usually finding a slightly lower spot a little to the side and then swoop to the ground. This seems to be less of an issue when they're swooping from higher up - but generally, it seems to be a lot more comfortable if you throw it a few metres to the side so that the descent is less steep). On that matter, they also walk a lot more than you would expect, once they're on the ground,

Being patient. As I said, they're prey animals and they're not domesticated. They might not even really understand what you want from them at first (but they're quick on the uptake and they remember your face). I started befriending my two guys because there is a very sick, very crappy walnut tree in front of my house where they go looking for nuts (which are also small and sickly). I first started feeding them by buying a back of walnuts from the store (really big ones) and placing them under that tree for them (and often cracking them open a little). They started to see me do that and got curious. That's when I started using eye contact to indicate that it was for them - and later I transitioned to feeding them directly and further away from the tree. We got to the point where I could just drop a walnut when I saw them somewhere and they knew it was for them. This also worked better than feeding them peanuts at first (they love peanuts now but at first they didn't even touch them because it was Weird and Strange) or feeding them elsewhere: Find a method that is within their frame of reference. It helped them make sense of what I was doing and from there we extrapolated: I started feeding them further away from that tree and started giving them other things.

Finding a routine! At this point, I have a pretty well-established rapport with my guys - we know where to find each other, what food I have and where I leave it for them when I'm not around, I know exactly how many steps I have to take back for Eggnog to take something (Omen doesn't really care about personal space as much), they know how to get my attention, what times I'm out and what times they go back to their night tree and all that. For some people, there are different routines. On reddit, some people talk about using a whistle to call them, my grandmother used to knock on the roof to call her crow friend back in the day. Some people talk to them to get them used to their voice and establish some expressions they might remember (I do that), some don't talk at all to avoid sounding scary. Some imitate crow noises, some avoid that at all costs. (I also think this depends on the crow. Some seem to react very positively to crow noises. some are scared off by it) But overall, I think the important thing is to remember that crows are some of the smartest animals around. They get used to you. They remember you and your behaviours and what they mean. And you will learn what these specific crows want (they have very unique personalities). So once you're in a "dialogue" with some crows, it's really a bit of a negotiation and you learn about one another - and it's fun! They will tell you how to befriend them, in their own way.

This might be me reading human behaviour into them - but based on crow personalities and the similarities between the way humans and crows think, I do believe that part of the reason they "keep me around" is...because I'm interesting to them. Crows are insanely curious, even if they're shy. I'm a bit of a novelty to them and so are the weird foods I give them. Where else would they get peanuts? One risk in feeding wild animals is that they might become overly dependent on the human doing it or lose their distance. From what I read and witnessed, crows stay pretty well on top of that - they're clever, they know how to procure food in their territory and whatever you feed them is bound to be only a small part of their daily foraging. Sometimes they will be gone for a day or two because they got better stuff to do (someone on reddit once called that "they're out on crow business") and just right now, during nesting season, they're clearly giving me some sort of "courtesy visit" once a day to stay in touch but they do know how to take care of themselves. Sure, I'm also a convenient and reliable food source (and a target for them to extort from) but they're also just straight up curious. So - use that to your advantage: Showing them new foods (make sure they're good for them!) is a good way to learn what they like AND to be interesting to them.

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jebewonmorelike · 7 months

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✰⋆⁺ Steal Your Heart Masterlist ⁺⋆✰

Masterlist for Steal Your Heart; an interactive fanfiction game in which the reader (no pronouns used) and the other nine members of AU ZB1 gain special powers to help defeat your vicious company-- and find adventure, fun, friendship, and love* along the way. Based on the game Persona 5, but no knowledge of the game is required for reading. All ages welcome; PG-13+ themes (specific warnings in introduction post and on individual chapters).

*Collect points during the game to determine your love interest (alternate endings for each member) at the end of the game!

*** Please locate the Resources section for the Game Score Sheet before beginning the game! (or click link above)

⁺⋆✰ Welcome, Player (Start Here)

I expect all chapters to be approx. 2k words; trying my best to condense my writing so I'll try to hold myself to it. Edit: I'm a big, fat liar.

⁺⋆✰ Part One: The Fool ✰⋆⁺ The Beginning

⁺⋆✰ Part Two: Chariot ✰⋆⁺ Kim Gyuvin

⁺⋆✰ Part Three: The Lovers ✰⋆⁺ Kim Jiwoong

⁺⋆✰ Part Four: The Magician ✰⋆⁺ Han Yujin

⁺⋆✰ Part Five: The Emperor ✰⋆⁺ Shen Ricky

⁺⋆✰ Part Six: Justice ✰⋆⁺ Seok Matthew

⁺⋆✰ Part Seven: Faith ✰⋆⁺ Kim Taerae

⁺⋆✰ Part Eight: The Hermit ✰⋆⁺ Park Gunwook

⁺⋆✰ Part Nine: The Empress ✰⋆⁺ Sung Hanbin

⁺⋆✰ Part Ten: The Priestess ✰⋆⁺ Zhang Hao

⁺⋆✰ Part Eleven: The Finale ✰⋆⁺ Alternate Endings

⁺⋆✰ Game Score Sheet Template

You will want to keep track of the points you earn for each ZB1 member each chapter: this will determine your alternate ending! Whichever member you've received the most points for will end up as your love interest at the end of the finale chapter. Don't want to end up with a love interest? No worries! Just sit back and enjoy the story. :) *Also, feel free to read any ending you want after you finish the game! It's just meant to be fun.

Disclaimer regarding Yujin: Yujin, the fictional character, is 18 in this story. This AU ZB1 is just a bit older than their actual ages! I will be writing an alternate ending for those who end up getting the most points for Yujin. I will only state this once: I will be writing this ending in the same way that adult writers write real young adult fiction novels. This will be written merely for enjoyment of young Yujin fans and does not in any way, shape, or form reflect the personal thoughts or beliefs of the author. It will be an age appropriate excerpt written about a fictional character and remain just that: fiction. Thank you for reading, understanding, and being respectful!

If people enjoy this style of fanfic (interactive/game format), I will definitely consider doing more <3

・゜゜ . . * ✧･ﾟ・ ✧･ﾟ: ・゜゜・．

⁺⋆✰ Masterpost of All Character Profiles

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trancylovecraft · 7 months

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Can I get headcanons for panty anarchy x reader?

(PASWG) YANDERE! PANTY ANARCHY x READER: General Headcannons

Thank you for ordering!

Come again soon!

Oooh nice one!

Panty Anarchy as a yandere I see as one of the less dangerous yandere's in this verse though to be fair none of them are THAT dangerous.

Not to say she isn't bad though. Far fucking from it!

I see her as an Obsessive, Clingy and Jealous kind of yandere. Perhaps Semi-Manipulative with a tinge of sadism too.

Obsessive in the way she just adores you. She thinks you're just the cutest thing and absolutely loves to tease you. Panty likes learning about you, Collecting some of your items

Clingy in the way she always has a hand touching you somewhere (I am now realising how bad that sounds once I type it out). An arm slugged over your shoulder, Hand holding as she takes you along. Panty is always following you around, Talking your ear off usually.

Jealous in the way that she just does NOT like anyone talking to you. Anyone that does interact with you she instantly grows a strong distaste for, Why would you be talking to anyone when she is right here? Panty's an angel, The hottest AND the most charming person you've met so why are you talking to them?

Leads us onto our next point. Semi-Manipulative in the way she instantly bad talks them to you, A lot of cuss words and disgusting metaphors. I don't think Panty's even aware she's manipulating you and changing your worldview, She tells you she gets a "Bad vibe" from them and to stay away.

And finally, Semi-Sadistic in the way she likes to tease you. Panty enjoys bantering with you and taking shots at one another, Loving the expressions of hurt or any reaction you may give. Don't worry though, If it gets too much she will apologise as she lazily tosses you a snack as payment.

She doesn't really remember how her obsession started, Panty just saw you one day said "God damn! They're HOT!" and your fate was sealed.

Panty, Unlike other yandere's wastes no time on approaching you. Instantly strutting up to you and starting to flirt with you to no end. At first, Panty treats this like any other man or woman she's trying to get with.

But when you start turning down her advances, She's standing there stunned. Even more so when you start hitting her back with her own lines, Matching her own flirtatious attitude perfectly.

Panty stands there flustered for the first time in her life. She can't say anything as you flirt back to her, Every little word you say makes her blush profusely. All before a shot of blood erupts from her nose and she falls unconscious on the floor.

Afterwards, She's hooked.

It's not just sexual anymore. Panty feels romantically attracted to you too, At first she finds this icky since romance just isn't her deal. Whenever Stocking mocks her for how she's feeling Panty is suddenly more defensive.

But once she finally settles with it her eyes are set on you entirely. Her hook-ups become less frequent since she's so busy on befriending and hopefully getting you in her bed.

Panty starts following you around. She begins to tease you, It's her way of talking. She keeps making innuendo's and hints at her feelings, You however shrug it off as you both start to gain somewhat of a friendship and see it banter. For you at least, Panty sees it waaaay differently.

Panty, As your relationship continues grows more and more enthralled in you. To the point she even starts slacking off when killing ghosts, Stocking is annoyed by this but Panty could not give a fuck.

Panty constantly mocks you. Sometimes pushing you around in a flirtatious way but nothing more than that.

She really starts to lean into the romantic stuff, Though she is not experienced in it whatsoever. It's also the reason why it comes off as banter when she shoves a bouquet in your hand, Her inexperience makes it look playful and platonic.

This starts to irritate Panty though she doesn't say anything about it. She believes if she throws enough bouquets into your hands and tosses you enough chocolate (It's Stockings) she'll date you soon enough.

That mentality only stops however once you start to go out with other friends.

Panty is absolutely baffled why. She's been working her ass off to try and get into your pants yet you want to hang out with other people? Panty is the hottest bitch here, Why the hell would you want to talk to anyone else?

Her jealous tendencies instantly kick in and she starts ranting off to you about the people you've been hanging around. She's throwing out every cuss word she can think of (its in the four figure digits) and starts telling you how horrible they are.

You instantly start telling her to back off. These are your friends you've known all your life and you've only known her for maybe a few months, She's acting real controlling and you don't like it.

After her blow-up at you, You decide you should start distancing yourself from her. Much to her chagrin of course, Especially once she see's that the time you spent with her is spent with them now.

Even more so when you seem to be getting.. Intimately close.

That's when she just can't handle it. Panty couldn't give two fucks if you cry or scream, She shoots your partner square in the head with a gun. Barely giving a shit once you yell out and run away.

Panty doesn't understand it either as she chases after you. Quickly catching up due to her angelic strength as she tackles you to the ground, Getting on top of you and threatening you at gunpoint.

You're crying as she acts just as normal as she usually does. Still throwing what she considers banter at you, You try to get away but she's too strong for you to do anything about it.

Before you know it you're thrown into the back of her car and driven off towards the church.

Now you enter the domestic stage.

You live in Panty's room from now on. Ignoring all the suggestive stuff you're basically locked in there forever, She doesn't let you out except to go to the bathroom.

Panty really could care less. She doesn't take anything seriously. While she is completely in love with you that doesn't mean she's delusional, Don't try to manipulate her into letting you out because she will figure it out.

She won't force anything on you other than maybe sleeping together and physical affection. Even though she is rather horny 24/7 she understands the importance of consent and won't do anything you're not comfortable with sexually.

Not romantically though. Panty still expects a kiss or two and keeps up with her touchy attitude. This time it's more intimate since she's decided courting is over.

Hugging, Cuddling, Lying in bed with her or general indoor PDA is all the rage with her. She's still new to this romantic stuff (Or in her words: "She feels like a fuckin' virgin again") and still get's flustered.

Panty loves you a lot but she doesn't say it. Her love language is touch and quality time, If you try to get her to admit it she'll get huffy and mock you more

If you try and escape it's most definetly possible. Though trust me it would be TOUGH. Gaining her trust or pretending to love her more than you actually do would be a good way.

Afterwards once she lowers her guard and leaves the door unlocked you could make a run for it.

If you do manage to get out she would be PISSED. Like you've been playing her this entire time and she's bloody angry, Hell and heaven are shaking rn kinda angry.

Panty would 24/7 be looking for you. She doesn't care who she has to diddle to get you back, She will, At any cost.

Once she does she'll drag you back screaming and crying by the hair or your legs, Yelling and cursing you out as you're unable to get out.

Once you're back she will NOT trust you again, Not for a long while. Not for a good few years. Your room will be double padlocked and you'll be locked in a closet when she's away for a few weeks.

Good luck :)

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sevensoulmates · 1 month

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Buddie Meta 7x04 Part 3 (of 4)

Click here for part 1, part 2 or part 4.

Onto gay scene number four.

This is ONCE AGAIN a direct parallel to 2x01. Ya know, the gym scene where everyone was like "why is Buck puffing his chest and trying to look hotter and stronger than Eddie"? Tim Minear would have us believe it's because he was threatened by Eddie, but those of us with our third eye open all know the man was attracted to Eddie, and Eddie was attracted right back.

Even down to putting the extra weights on the lift machine, it's almost beat for beat the same Buck trying to get Eddie's attention, only this time they have six years of love and devotion under their belt. This peacocking isn't about trying to prove Buck is better than Eddie, and it's most definitely not about Tommy. Tommy isn't here, neither is he mentioned. The object of Buck's attention is purely Eddie. Buck wants Eddie to look over and notice him without a spotter and come running over to be his partner, and maybe he also wants Eddie to notice that Buck is also strong and capable and sexy. Y'all ever seen those mating rituals where the male tries to prove he's big and strong and interesting so that the female will choose him? Buck is trying to make himself appear sexier than Tommy, and in my opinion, there's no other way to read this scene than that.

He keeps looking to see if Eddie is noticing him, and when Ravi offers to be Buck's spot he shoos him away. What's also interesting is the framing of the camera. Eddie is positioned in the background between Buck's spread legs and his open arms. I'm not a filmmaker so I don't really know 100% what that means, but I just think it's an interesting choice to have Buck purposefully putting his crotch forward for Eddie to see, and keeping Eddie constantly in view only through Buck's spread arms and legs. Idk, it's givingggmmmgaysex. But what do I know?

Also keep in mind we (and probably Buck too) don't actually know who Eddie is talking to on the phone. We're meant to assume it's Tommy, but it could be Marisol, right? The last time Eddie had this kind of giggly little phone interaction it was in 6x18 with Marisol. But the show wants us to believe it's Tommy and to connect all of Eddie's actions with Tommy to being potentially romantic.

Buck specifically has a basketball delivered to the station instead of, you know, his home, in order for Eddie to notice that Buck is suddenly interested in basketball and invite him again to play with them on Thursday. And again, I don't blame Eddie for missing the signs here. Buck has made it clear multiple times in the past that he does not want to play basketball with the other firefighters. So why would Eddie suddenly assume he's interested now? Plus he's distracted on the phone, so he might not have even really fully processed what Buck said or the insinuation of wanting to play basketball on Thursday. Buck sits down completely rejected because his latest attempt to gain EDDIE'S ATTENTION (not Tommy's) has been foiled. But thankfully Chimney comes along and provides Buck another access point.

Even Chimney is confused as to why Buck suddenly wants to play basketball. His excuses are weak, and Chimney instantly clocks that Buck isn't really there to play basketball with him but because he's trying to get in with Eddie and Tommy. Whether or not Chimney knows that Buck's trying to do it for Eddie's attention is unknown. We know that he was partially around when Buck was blabbing to Maddie, but he may not have caught the full context.

Again, Buck is witness to how easily Tommy and Eddie touch, even though this in particular is much more "bro-y" than anything Buck and Eddie have ever done before. It's interesting that even though the episode is trying to show that the Tommy/Eddie relationship is similar to the Buck/Eddie relationship, there are still pointed times like this where the show still frames Tommy/Eddie as very very different, platonic-only, much more "bro-like" friendship.

This time however EDDIE is the one who calls Tommy "his boy!". Now we're finally getting the reversal of Tommy in Eddie's possessive. BUT this doesn't shift Eddie out of Tommy's possessive just yet. Instead, it is a mutual claim in conjunction with the rest of the scene that follows. So now it's not just a fear that Buck has that Eddie would choose Tommy over him, it's metaphorically come true. Now Tommy is Eddie's boy, and if that's the case, where does that leave Buck?

Eddie, as lovingly oblivious as always, is shocked to see Buck here and subtly showcases his own jealousy. It's not anywhere near on the same level, but it does show Eddie noticing that Buck never says yes to him to play basketball, but somehow Chim got him to come? It does show that Eddie is still thinking about Buck here and thinking about what Eddie wasn't able to do to convince him.

This little exchange shows yet another little way in which Tommy is encroaching on Buck's place with Eddie. The trope of "battlefield boyfriends" aka the two of them against the world. Tommy is extremely confident that he and Eddie will be able to beat Buck and Chim, and that rubs Buck the wrong way. Because up until now it's been BuckAndEddie against everyone else, and now it's TommyAndEddie. They're each other's "men". They're the team against Buck. Now it's become something hostile.

This is a poke at Buck because he figures out he's bisexual at the end of the episode. But it's also funny because back in the day there used to be a lot of talk around Eddie in particular having beards. Beards can be both a conscious or unconscious choice on the part of a queer person. For some people, they don't know they're using someone as a beard because they're still deep in compulsive heterosexuality. In my opinion, this description fits Eddie and Marisol best at this point in time. I'm not saying that this Chim line is about Eddie, but it does bring up the question of beards in canon and who/what might be considered a beard in the current storyline.

Buck, honey, Eddie was paying you so much attention here. He was trying to have a fun game of basketball game here, but Buck couldn't even let himself enjoy it because he couldn't get it out of his mind that Eddie wasn't on his team, that Eddie's playing against him, with Tommy.

Eddie says an interesting line here to Buck: "You ain't getting past me" and it's so true, Eddie. Buck is probably not ever gonna be able to move past his feelings for you, regardless of who he dates in the middle.

And then we have yet another directorial camera shot that mimics the same dynamic at the end of 7x03. Eddie is running forward, Buck is desperately following behind him, and Tommy's running behind both of them. This could be foreshadowing again how no matter how much Tommy might try, Buck will always be chasing after Eddie.

Something else interesting to me is how the Buck/Eddie body slam is similar to the Eddie/Tommy body slam. These "intricate rituals" queer men will have in order to find socially acceptable ways to touch each other. It also takes me back to earlier in the meta where I talked about men using fighting/physical violence as an excuse to touch each other, hence why wrestling is a homoerotic sport. I don't know what was going through Buck's head, but I do think he was trying in some way, to force back that physical touch with Eddie, and take it away from Tommy. And in a way, it does also feel like a punishment. Like Buck's trying to make Eddie feel bad for being this physical with Tommy. And yes, Buck was in the wrong here. He let his hurt and jealousy get the best of him here and hurt Eddie in the process.

I've seen people wonder why Buck wasn't freaking out about Eddie the way he has in the past. Well, one, this isn't a life or death scenario, and two, this is the first time it's ever been Buck's fault that Eddie's hurt. I think Buck's in shock. He's probably stunned and disgusted with himself and his desire to help Eddie is being hindered by extreme guilt, hurt, shame, and a whirlwind of other emotions he probably can't process in the moment. And that leads him to just stand still and watch instead of trying to help. He likely also thinks that Eddie wouldn't accept his help at this moment either. Buck does try to be the one who takes Eddie to the hospital, and likely would've apologized along the way. It could've been a good time for them to talk, to confront and work out the issue, but Tommy (once again) swoops in to be the one to help Tommy, effectively cutting off Buck's last chance to prove himself to Eddie.

Now, Buck's lost the last thing he can provide to Eddie over Tommy: safety, having his back, and being the one person he can always trust above all else. Buck probably thinks he's broken Eddie's trust and will lose him to Tommy for sure now. That's the kind of catastrophizing I can see him leaping to at this point in time.

Buck then does what he does best, and pulls away. Not because he doesn't care about Eddie, but because he's already accepted that he's lost Eddie.

Buck admits that this was a backward way of punishing Eddie, and Maddie rightfully puts him in his place for that. But then again, Maddie is speaking from a place of knowing what it's like to be physically abused (not saying this is abuse but it does still inform Maddie's perspective). Buck however is acting not from a place of an abuser or actually wanting to hurt someone, but from a place of living his whole life only knowing one way of getting people's attention. And for the longest time, that method involved hurting himself. And this time when hurting himself wasn't an option, it ended up coming out as hurting Eddie. Again, I am not trying to condone or excuse Buck's actions, but I am trying to provide a reason so we're not out here writing a million think pieces and fics about how Buck is suddenly a horrible physically abusive person (we're NOT having a repeat of the way y'all treated Eddie after the streetfighting arc). He made a mistake and obviously, he's going to apologize to Eddie and sincerely understand his actions were absolutely not it in the next episode. So, just like we're giving Eddie some grace here, let's give Buck some grace too. Moving on.

Maddie does have a point, and she's right in a lot of ways, however, she, as a (as far as we know) straight woman, is coming at this from the perspective of being "friend-jealous" which we all know is disproven for Buck less than 10 minutes later. This talk with Maddie does give Buck good advice, but at the same time, I do believe it's likely confused him further. Because now he believes that the way he was feeling was normal best friend jealousy feelings when they really were not. Her advice is solid but doesn't really push Buck to think deeper about why all of a sudden he felt like Eddie making a new friend was the end of the goddamn world. And she can't really know to push him in that direction because she's operating under the assumption that Buck is straight. But he's not. They're both missing fundamental information here and without that, Buck still cannot truly process the depth of his feelings. I think this is a large part of why when Tommy comes over and kisses him in the next scene, Buck finds it very easy to glom onto the "out of nowhere" notion that the reason he was acting this way the entire episode is because he wants Tommy. It's very well true that Buck could've been experiencing physical attraction and an infatuation/crush on Tommy, but now, with Maddie's misinformed permission, switches targets and projects all of his big bi feelings onto Tommy.

Buck is surprised Tommy came over, the audience and Buck both expect Eddie to be standing on the other side of the door. Tommy seems like a very observant character. He picks up on Buck's queerness (and likely Eddie's) and picks up on why Buck has been acting out of character the whole episode. Buck owns up to his actions and admits that yes, Tommy and Eddie can be friends and Eddie can have more than one friend.

We then get an acknowledgment from Tommy that actually when he spends time with Eddie and Chris, the two of them talk about Buck a lot. Eddie isn't specifically mentioned, but it's implied that Eddie has told Tommy a lot about Buck if Tommy already knows that Buck is an irreplaceable part of both their lives. It's also funny because the last time someone said this, it was Buck trying to reassure Christopher that none of his dad's girlfriends would ever replace his mom. This once again firmly places Buck in the category of an irreplaceable parent for Christopher.

This is another callback to season 3, the last time Buck and Eddie fought over the lawsuit, and Buck "making it about himself". This is a consistent character flaw in Buck, and at least now all of the characters can recognize it for what it is. It's also a callback to the 3x09 scene "You're gonna make it about you? again?" But see the thing is, I don't really think Buck was making Tommy and Eddie's friendship about him. I think he was hit with a rush of fear of missing out on what he and Eddie could be, and because he still didn't have the words to explain what exactly that meant, it came out in the only way he could think to communicate it: through trying to get Eddie's attention like a little kid pulling a girl's pigtails. It's unhealthy, yes, but it's all Buck really knows at this point.

Tommy admits that he was also jealous, not exactly of Buck and Eddie, but of the 118 and how they've built an unbreakable family bond that only came to be right after he left. Tommy wanted to be a part of that, and oh boy, if that's something Buck can relate to. The specific black hole craving to find a family that accepts you.

And I absolutely believe that Buck is curious about Tommy, does want to be his friend, and does think he's super cool and probably thinks he's super hot and attractive as well. But the vibe I'm getting here is that Buck is seeking out in Tommy what he craves from Eddie.

Go to part 4 for the last part I swear!!

Part 4. Part 1, Part 2.

#911 abc #buddie #911 meta #buddie meta #buck x eddie #evan buckley x eddie diaz #bucktommy #911 speculation #buddie speculation

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