hey so uh I’m back
kinda
I don’t know how to word this. But my break is over I guess. I ended up leaving for longer as I didn’t know how to handle returning and I wanted to do it on a better day, and I’m sorry if I made you worried.
Although with all of this it feels nothing has changed yet again. It feels like forever since I’ve been here and my break consisted of highs and lows where I felt I could do nothing and desperately needed to go back to tumblr, or I feel relaxed and it was a good idea.
it’s very hard. I’m considering actually leaving for good because of how my break affected me. But I’m going to try to intergrate myself back here, but I think it’s going to be very hard.
I’m still scared staying here and I feel like I’m stuck in a narrow space with no exit no matter what I do, I just hate everything I hate myself I just want help but there’s no one to get help from I have no idea what to do I feel exhausted yet I haven’t done anything I just don’t know where this is all going and I’m scared for the future
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Now this could be a translation thing, but I don’t think it is. I can’t get over how Baram wrote his first love song and called it “Letter of Apology” like he was sorry that he had fallen in love. And then he spends the majority of the show being sorry for having fallen in love.
But back to the song. He writes Letter of Apology and plays it for his crush only for said crush to not even listen to the song except to give feedback on how to make it “better.” Then it gets unapologetically stolen and changed. Sangin never heard the song. He just stole it and never once apologized.
Then when Baram is just trying to let it go, his wishes are ignored and Hantae tells the world who really wrote the song (not gonna lie I don’t really blame Hantae but it’s complicated). Baram is so sorry for having fallen for Sangin and then he’s sorry that his own song gets stolen and he’s sorry that he fell for Hantae. Only when he releases himself from the hold the hurt from Sangin has on him can he move on. That’s why he has to take back his confession. He’s still sorry but this time he won’t hurt because of it.
Then Hantae doesn’t let it go. Hantae confesses too and tells him there’s nothing wrong with being in love. Hantae shows Baram a world where love isn’t about being sorry for your feelings but embracing them and loving unapologetically. And Baram’s second love song isn’t apologetic. It isn’t melancholic. It’s so full of love and light. Just…I love it so much.
But just the queer implications of it all with Baram being so sorry both times he fell in love. Sangin did not deserve Baram’s heart and he’s the only one in the show that should be sorry and yet he never was even after threatening to out Baram. Hantae may have been oblivious but he was sorry when he learned the truth and he worked hard to make it up to Baram.
What a delightful show that I’m gonna be thinking about all day.
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How would Sokka rank Gaang members in terms of how often they give him migraine ?
LMFAOOOOOO well.
obviously as his little sister, it is katara’s god-given duty to give sokka as many migraines as possible. every day he sits there while she yells at him until she tires herself out, and he’s just used to that. not to mention her propensity to become infatuated with obvious cult leaders, shady characters, and/or greasy & terrible boys; her staunch belief in astrology and other such nonsense; her proclivity to jump headfirst into danger without considering the consequences on the basis that it was “the right thing to do” (god katara don’t you know morality is relative?); the constant drenching him in freezing cold water and smacking him over the head whenever she feels like it; and of course the fact that she is constantly loudly lecturing him and all of their friends on what she deems the “proper” way to behave. though of course, sokka has also been known to give katara migraines, usually due to his extremely frustrating condescending attitude wherein he loves to imply that katara possesses no logical faculties, but lest we forget “the cactus juice incident.” although then again, to sokka, he thinks it’s a fair tradeoff considering that he was only Like That for 24 hours tops, whereas katara, aang, and toph are Like That every waking moment of the day. he has yet to share this judgment with katara though, as he knows she would only smack him over the head for it. such are siblings.
aang generally gives sokka migraines on the basis that he is katara’s #1 enabler, and therefore constantly helping katara exacerbate the migraine she is currently giving sokka. that said, sometimes he has been known to (attempt to) rein katara in, which sokka greatly appreciates. aang also gives sokka migraines separately from his katara-worship though, such as when he thinks it’s funny to prank sokka first thing in the morning, refuses to follow the very practical route sokka mapped out for them due to his desire to ride a large animal or something like that, or ignores sokka’s logical advice and careful planning because he wants to have “fun.” plus, when aang got momo, he promised that momo would be his pet and his responsibility, but it soon became increasingly clearer that aang only likes momo when momo is being cute, and momo sees sokka as his primary caregiver. as if sokka didn’t see that coming. but his complaints are pretty superficial, if we’re being honest; he loves that little lemur.
toph revels in her role as sokka’s best friend in the world and also giant pain in his tuchus. although honestly, he mostly finds her attempts to annoy him on purpose endearing, and what really spurs on the migraines are her inane and frequent fights with katara, which always end up affecting him in some way or another, despite his being a neutral party dammit! unlike aang, who gives sokka migraines by being katara’s #1 enabler, toph gives sokka migraines by being katara’s #1 detractor. also, she is constantly punching him in the arm, which is still better than a smack to the head, granted, but considering how frequent these punches are, he’s beginning to worry that the bruise that has formed on his bicep might now just be permanent.
zuko is simultaneously katara’s #2 enabler and her #2 detractor. they are either always doing something ridiculous and dangerous together that sokka has to put a stop to before they hurt themselves and/or others, or they are fighting over something completely trivial because neither of them know how to give up on anything ever, whereas they’re great at escalation. also they’re constantly whispering to each other in a way that makes it obvious that they’re talking about him, which wouldn’t even bother him if not for the fact that they’re constantly like “sokka stop listening we are having a private conversation!!!!” to which sokka has to promise them that he couldn’t care less about their conversation and therefore was definitely not listening, and remind them that it’s not actually a private conversation if they’re sitting right next to him, on his bed, in his bedroom. that said, when zuko isn’t around katara, he’s actually usually pretty reasonable, and only gives sokka migraines on those days wherein he clearly hasn’t slept enough and doesn’t check his first instinct to yell and scream and shoot fire everywhere. but sokka has a simple solution to that, which is just to leave the room. #not his problem!
sokka is convinced that ty lee loves saying stupid shit on purpose just to annoy him specifically. for example, what the FUCK is an aura. like. it’s one thing for sheep like katara and zuko to buy into all that horoscope bullshit but ty lee??? he knows how smart she is why is she doing this cmon ty lee you’re better than this!!!!!
the only time mai has been responsible for sokka’s migraines is when she’s made him babysit tom tom, and even then he can hardly blame her for that because she is such a good partner in commiserating over their shared migraines that it basically cancels out.
suki is the opposite of a migraine-inducer. in fact, her mere presence is a palliative. katara and toph could be throwing rocks at each other, but all he has to do is look at her and his migraine abates. TGFS (thank god for suki) <3
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i think that people who post x reader fics should be in the habit of tagging them with a simple “x reader” so that users who blacklist x reader fics do not have to add individual blacklists for every single fictional character they like. food 4 thought
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