#I don’t know what the fuck
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how do i explain that it feels like years have passed in a second and i still carry the dreams of my seven year old self on my shoulder?
that i shove little moments from every year into my pockets while everyone else moved on?
or that i couldn’t let go even when it started to hurt?
that i held onto them against times current and sifted them until they worn into soft stones?
and molded them into a comforting presence?
that even when stones became boulders and i couldn’t carry anymore,
i still did.
and even if it made me sink,
i held onto them.
even if it became suffocating,
i let myself drown before i let go.
how do i explain that i couldn’t float because i hold on to everything and everyone i’ve ever known?
and i could never forget the way i felt, so i wore the weight of it like my skin instead.
how do i explain that i’m never really here because a part of me could never let go of the past?
how do i explain that i’m still stuck there?
how do i let go?
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why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?
#instant conversation enders for my multiple youth pastor cousins#don’t say it (I’m gonna say it)#The Child is The Price#but i mean come on#as someone who isn't actually even christian the real-life historical version of this is still cursed as fuck#i mean we know that jesus was a person who existed. whatever circumstances he was born in#its terrifyingly ominous to imagine being so unaware of the affect your child will have on the future of humanity#time itself will one day be counted around your birth of him#and all because he will suffer an excruciatingly painful death that you will not be able to prevent#not only that. but regardless of his or your intentions#regardless of whether there is a god#for millenea unfathomable millions will have blood spilled and will spill blood in his name#atrocities will be committed that you cannot even conceive of#and all on his and your behalf#you love your child. its beautiful. but there's horror in what you've done. because everyone else will love him too#and what's more dangerous than that?
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dungeon meshi is my favorite road-trip comedy film
#dungeon meshi#my art#laios thorden#senshi#marcille#chilchuck#chilchack#izatsumi#laois#laius thorden#sorry guys I don’t know which spelling is correct here#chilchucks car is a beat up beige Honda civic#laois never got a license because even though he’s actually a good driver he just never cared enough to do it#plus he wants to travel in some wacky way. like on a five person tandem bicycle or some shit#marcille never got a license because just fucking look at her#plus she gets motion sick in cars. she just would#senshi walks everywhere and has no need for cars#izatsumi just learned what a car was two days ago and she’s pissed that chilchuck doesn’t have a lambo#chilchuck doesn’t have time for any of this. he has to get his daughter to soccer practice at 5
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been thinkin about how my ethics professor back in undergrad was like.
look. there’s no such thing as perfect altruism. you’ll always get something out of helping or being kind to others, whether it’s a stronger relationship or returned kindness or just the feeling of having done good. there’s nothing inherently bad about getting something from doing good either, especially since it’s completely unavoidable. people being rewarded for putting love into the world doesn’t make the world a worse place. so just do as much good as you can and don’t worry about being “selfless” while doing it, because being truly selfless is in fact impossible.
and like man did that take the pressure off of Being A Good Person!! you’re allowed to enjoy helping people! you’re allowed to be kind without worrying that you’re maybe secretly just doing it for yourself!! it’s okay if you are doing it for yourself because you’re still being kind to others!!!!!
#like truly i think that was what finally finished the process of un-fucking my brain from all of the Catholic Trauma#i don’t know what made me think of this again or what possessed me to make this post but. voila.
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This took me 2 hours to make i almost passed outn2 tikmes I’m so tirfed
edit: do not repost my art to a different site/platform/app. if sharing on discord/etc, just directly linkback to the post. thank u! oc redraws are fine, just credit me!! and tag me in those id like to see lol
#was it worth it#I don’t. Know#atsv#spiderverse#spiderman#across the spiderverse#what REALLY happened#miguel o'hara#shadow the hedgehog#LIKE DID ANYBODY SEE THE CONNECTIONS?? LITERALLY NO DIFFERENCE BWTEEN THEM..#I’d be so fucking surprised if I was the first one to. Instantly notice that#riotspider art#miles morales#hobie brown#spider punk#atsv fanart#atsv miguel#atsv hobie#atsv miles#edit; damn this hitting numbers.. ty for 14 likes 😊#edit; wwait wtf what the fuck why is there 11.7k notes
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it’s so funny to me that people used to try to warn me “if you go on t it won’t make you androgynous it’ll just make you look like a man” because 1) i do want to look like a man, that is famously a major part of being a trans man but also 2) t literally has made me androgynous?? like they were wrong on both counts. i got most of the looking-like-a-man changes that i wanted (deep voice, broader body, hair all over my body including my face) and i also give every single cis person in a five mile radius a stroke every time they try to figure out my gender. the assumption that trans men wouldn’t actually want to look like men and the assumption that cis people are good at correctly gendering us once we’re on t are both weird as hell.
#people said this to me all the fucking time pre t#to the point that it did almost make me too afraid to go on t bc ‘what if they’re right and i don’t really want to look like a man?’#but it turns out that was bullshit on so many levels#i look ‘like a man’ now and love it and also am the most androgynous person most cis people i meet have ever seen#y’all just don’t know how t works at fucking all#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia#trans men#transmascs
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“actually the term you’re looking for is pansexual” actually i’m dying right now. i am dying right now before your very eyes and those are the last words i had to read before my soul vacates this plane of existence forever. Are you proud of yourself
#when will y’all just accept they’re synonymous and stop being fucking weird to bisexual people. God in heaven#why do you have to act like bisexual people Don’t know what bisexuality means and like you’re More Woke because hearts not parts. stop it#but anyway. i am bi because i only fuck evil people with fat asses. that’s true
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Yeah uhhh what the fuck was that
#I don’t know what to say 😀#what just happened#miss minutes what the fuck#what kind of drugs were the writers ON#that shit was so uncomfortable 😭#marvel#mcu loki#mcu#loki#loki series#loki season 2#loki spoilers#loki laufeyson#mobius m mobius#miss minutes#victor timely#he who remains#lokius#loki x mobius#mobius x loki
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what did he mean by this
#miles edgeworth#phoenix wright#wrightworth#narumitsu#ace attorney#what the fuck do you mean by this edgeworth#and ppl say it’s not canon#mine#edit: apparently people don’t know but this is from the official manga#check the replies for which volume#i can’t handle this being my most popular post#how has no one posted this on here yet i thought i was having a stroke when i saw this page
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The defintion of hell is knowing a show is incredibly well-received in its first season, but if people don’t become machines churning out tweets, content, and rewatching 24/7, there’s no likelihood it’ll get a chance to tell its whole story. This shit is madness. Shows in different genres shouldn’t have to pit-battle for dominance. First seasons are MEANT to be baselines establishing worlds and characters, not complete storylines. The idea that this golden age of television has turned into “get it done in one or get out” is revolting.
#the sandman#paper girls#some of the hot takes on Twitter are breaking me#‘why don’t we know the whole story? it’s bad writing if you don’t have a complete story in the first season’ girl WHAT since WHEN#how many excellent shows were weak as fuck in S1?? and here we’re getting shows with incredible first seasons fighting for their lives#like fuckin Christ dude the idea of long form storytelling is allowing your story time and space to spread out#otherwise we would only make movies#i am so sick of this edge of my seat fear that any new show I fall in love with will get axed because the higher powers don’t care about art#this has to be a bubble right? this has to pop at some point and go back to shows valued on what they are#and don’t even get me started on creators having to beg for good reviews to balance out review-bombing from shitheads#if every one star review is clearly bigoted from the comments? why is anyone taking them into account??#why is there no way to manage this shit aside from creators being like ‘please help us”’
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do i have… Opinions abt the pjo show?? maybe. in private amongst close confidants, i might. but publicly?? as a fan who wants all 5 seasons?? incredible. five shiny stars! the best show i’ve ever fucking seen im showing it 2 everyone i know
#genuinely i do fucking love this show#well. do i.#if i stew on my takes long enough maybe i’ll verbalize them#bc i wanna talk abt what i love abt it too#i just don’t know if i can talk abt them w/o touching on what i think needs improvement#might just wait until the season is over we’ll see#percy jackson tv show#percy jackson#pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo tv show#rick riordan#ris raves#pjo show crit
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#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#exu calamity#brennan lee mulligan#cerrit agrupnin#Brennan I fucking see you don’t even stop#YOU FUCKING SAID THE LINE ‘IVE GOT MY EYE ON YOU’#I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE#my post#anyway Brennan is a simp for his cool dnd friends and I respect it so much#this is a meme of love
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I sincerely hope every artist gets to have the experience of falling in love with their art someday. even if you have to fight for it. i think we all deserve to look at the result of our creativity all giddy and go holy shit, I loved making this! I love the lines I put down and the colors I used and the indulgences I’ve taken. I love seeing things I liked and taking it for my own, pushing and molding and playing. I can’t wait to do it again
#art stuff#maybe this is just me being all mushy or whatever but GOD#i used to hate my art so fucking much#i used to hate the act of creating so deeply that putting pen to paper knotted up my insides#and I don’t know HOW I grew through that but I did! i genuinely thought it was the end of such an important part of who I am#but it wasn’t!#and now for the last few years I’ve been consistently able to look at my art and feel proud of myself? like holy shit I made this!#i have such good taste!#and there have been times where I’ve hated the process or been dissatisfied with theresult ofc#art is fucking hard#art block and burnout is a bitch#but Ive still been able to look at the sum of my journey and just feel. satisfied. and accomplished#eager for growth but still proud of what I’ve made#idk#we all deserve that someday
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“peeta is bisexual” you guys are losing the vision. peeta isn’t even straight. katniss INVENTED sexuality for him. whatever katniss identifies as, he’s like “yeah, i’ll take that one” no questions asked
#katnissexual#i’m joking btw#and i agree with yall#he says you’ve ruined all other women for me#yeah twink we know#the hunger games#katniss everdeen#thg#nightlocked-in#everlark#peeta mellark#hunger games headcanon#hunger games incorrect quotes#thg incorrect quotes#bisexual peeta#peeta what’s your sexuality?#idk#what do u mean u don’t know#i’ve never thought about it#well i mean… do you like guys? do u like girls?#he thinks for a second…. girl#just one#katniss he says#i’m convinced in modern au’s when he’s dating someone else he just pictures katniss when fucking and then feels horribly guilty for it later#peeta why don’t you look at me during sex?#huh? oh glimmer uh… i just get distracted by how uh… good it feels. yeah that haha#katniss was his first love in every thing and not only was she his first love she was his ONLY love#so he’s never even considered being attracted to girls besides her#so when he tries to date he finds girls that are objectively attractive but on a scale of 1 to katniss they are still 1’s to him#and that never stops being a problem
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Okay but the Justice League finds out their new baby hero teammate Phantom is the Ghost King by virtue of the Fright Night showing up while they're in the middle of a meeting, looking terrifying and such and scaring the shit out of everyone- even more so when Constantine starts freaking out over the fact that the sworn night of the King of the Infinite Realms is in the Watchtower what the fuck that's apocalyptically bad Pariah Dark is supposed to be locked the fuck up forever - but instead of trying to smite them all or yeet them into the nightmare dimension he just pulls out a space themed packed lunch??? And gives it to Phantom??
And the mildly eldritch giant murder ghost is talking about how "The Queen Mother commanded me to ensure you ate my Lord, she says you missed your morning meal."
And Phantom is just grumbling about over protective sisters and "there's a cafeteria i would have been fine" what the fuck is happening right now?
What do you mean "oops you forgot" Phantom I thought the ghost thing was just a theme!
#dc x dp#dp x dc#justice league#danny phantom#danny fenton#jazz fenton#fright knight#ghost king danny#fanfic writing prompts#danny at lunch later: aw shit she packed from home now i gotta fight it#justice league watching in horror as his left overs try to kill him: what the fuck what the fuck what the fu-#john constantine#Constantine thinks danny as the ghost king is gonna yell at him about all the soul selling#Danny just thinks it's hilarious and has no intention of interfering#he doesn’t have to deal with that paperwork and thise demons are assholes anyway#danny does get a long lecture after fright knight shows up about sharing need to know information#he gets another one after that about not missing meals#JL member: I don’t *care* if you're the Ghost King you're still growing and need to make sure you're eating enough!#Danny desperately trying to keep them from meeting Jazz because it's all over for his days of eating junk food if that happens
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The biggest misconception in the bsd fandom ever to me is people constantly portraying Atsushi as someone who trauma dumps excessively when he canonically barely talks about it at all.
The entire point is that Atsushi does not talk about his trauma he’s just constantly thinking about/reliving it. He can’t escape the memories of his past so he tries not to acknowledge them.
He only mentions it when asked, either directly or when someone asks him to explain himself.
Atsushi doesn’t even give a cohesive explanation for what he saw while under Dogra Magra, he just apologizes to Haruno and Naomi.
If Lucy hadn’t had her whole “you’ve never suffered the way I have” spiel then I doubt even the audience would’ve gotten to find out about his scars
If Akutagawa never asked him how it felt for the orphanage headmaster to die Atsushi would have never told him that he’s been hallucinating.
In the omake where Kyoka asks him why his hair is like that it’s clear he wouldn’t have told her that unless she had asked.
In 55 minutes Atsushi very briefly mentions sleeping on a dirty floor somewhere to Kunikida because he was trying to explain and justify his behavior.
And the thing is that there are scenes that implies that the other characters see Atsushi behaving strangely and are visibly confused because they do not understand what’s wrong with him.
Remember, we as an audience get to see things about characters that the main cast doesn’t. Just because we see into Atsushi’s mind doesn’t mean the other characters know what’s going on in there.
Also little footnote here that I think this is a reference to the moon over the mountain but I digress
#bsd#atsushi nakajima#bsd atsushi#nakajima atsushi#idk#on the floor wallowing in pain as we speak#bungou stray dogs#tagging is hard and i’m lazy#I love the Atsushi trauma dumping for no reason headcanon too#but I have to complain about it not being canon accurate#just don’t put it in fanfiction ok that’s all I ask#Guys let atsushi be painstakingly vague about his past in peace stop ruining it#atsushi#Atsushi hated pain#but pain had been an intimate- dies#anybody have fanfic recs with this concept or do I have to write them myself#idk guys you’ll just never catch me writing anything where the other characters truly understand Atsushi#sorry#Kunikida will never be written to know what the fuck is wrong with him for as long as I live#He just gives up#at some point
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