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bunnimew · 4 years

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Not Much for a Soul

Rating: T Fandom: Rise of the Guardians Relationship: Jack Frost/Pitch Black Tags: Demon AU, Humor, Fluff, Consent issues dragged out into the light lawl, Kind of a meetcute if you tilt your head and squint a little Summary: For RotG Halloween 2020: Day 6 @rotg-halloween

A flat bike tire changes Pitch's future.

On AO3 here.

This route was a lot less terrifying on a bike.

The traffic was too far away. Pitch never usually had that thought, but tonight, limited to the speed and resilience of his own two feet, the sounds of life were muffled and distant. He felt that if something happened to him here, no one would arrive in time. No one might even hear him.

The buildings on either side of the street were tall and dark, closed and locked for the night. Nobody here had worked as late as Pitch had. None of them had stayed late enough to be sentry for his safe passage.

He was being dramatic.

Nothing was going to happen. If there was nobody here, the way it looked and sounded, then there was no one here to help him nor hurt him. He just had to get home.

Pitch reset his grip on the handlebars and decided not to think about it anymore. He would need to get the tire replaced in the morning; he didn’t want to walk this path at night again if he didn’t have to.

“Nice bike.”

Pitch damn near jumped out of his skin. It was his own fault. He’d hyped up the desertion of the street and the creepiness of the quiet all by himself. If he was afraid of the lone, thin teen standing under the streetlight who looked like he might weigh a hundred pounds soaking wet, he did it to himself.

What was this kid doing out here, anyway?

“Thanks.” The reply was automatic. Compliment? Thanks. “Can I help you?”

“Oooh,” the teen smiled. “Accent. I like it.”

Pitch wished he hadn’t stopped, because now it would be rude to keep walking.

“You don’t seem lost.”

The teen shook his head. “Nah, I’m right where I want to be.”

Pitch thought as much. He gestured in the direction he’d been walking. “Then, if you don’t mind…”

He didn’t manage a full step before the teen spoke again. “Maybe you can still help me.”

Pitch swallowed, irritated, and put his foot back down. Manners were a curse. “With?”

“I’m Jack,” he said, and tilted his head forward charmingly with a smile to match, “and I’m looking for some souls. May I have yours?”

Pitch couldn’t help it. He snorted a laugh.

“I know, it sounds stupid—”

“That’s the worst pick-up line I’ve ever heard.”

“It is pretty bad, isn’t it?” Jack’s nose wrinkled in distaste, but his smile didn’t go anywhere. “What’s your name?”

“Pitch.” He nodded. “But I’m not really looking to date, right now, so…”

He was stopped again. “Not even a pretty little thing like me?” Jack batted his blue eyes at him and tilted his face at an alluring angle. It was an impressively self-aware display.

And Pitch had to admit, those eyes were quite pretty. Combined with his pale, dishevelled hair and rounded chin, the man was striking. And maybe he wasn’t as young as Pitch originally thought; he’d never met someone under the age of twenty this smooth. Smooth didn’t mean trustworthy, though. “I don’t even know you.”

“You know I’m looking for souls,” Jack insisted with bright eyes and a convincing grin.

Pitch snorted again. “Does that line ever work?”

“Surprisingly high success rate.”

Pitch shook his head, but there was a laugh on his lips. Disbelieving maybe, but a laugh all the same. “You’re on an awfully deserted street if you’re looking for people.”

Jack’s grin changed. It was small, but Pitch could swear it was… devilish, now. “I found one,” he pointed out.

Which, Pitch shrugged a shoulder, “I’ll give you that.”

Jack splayed his hands and despite all the smiles, all the posing, now was the most salesman-like he’d seemed all night. “So what do you want for it?”

Pitch furrowed his brows. Had he missed something? “What do you mean?”

“Say I was a demon,” Jack said, moving his hands and shoulders in overly casual ways that made Pitch pay extra attention to them, to what they could be hiding, “Say I was actually looking for souls. Would you sell me yours?”

That was maybe the oddest question Pitch had ever been asked. He wondered why he wasn’t saying no. “I suppose that depends. What are you offering?”

Jack laughed. It wasn’t the sleazy laugh of a dealmaker or the forced laugh of marketing. He sounded delighted. “Care and affection?”

Pitch considered it, but only for a second. “That doesn’t seem like much for a soul.”

“It’s really not.” Jack shook his head, and Pitch got the impression he was having the time of his life with this.

Pitch suddenly realized he was still clutching his bike, standing on a deserted street in his work clothes, talking to a man barely out of college about selling souls. He blinked, and said the words before he thought more about it. “This is an odd conversation to be having this time of night in a place like this.”

Jack shrugged and leaned back against the light pole behind him. The yellow cone made it hard for Pitch to say whether his hair was actually white or a pale blond, and it washed out the blue in his eyes. “How about love?”

Pitch blinked again and told himself to stop looking so hard at Jack. They were having a conversation, still, apparently. “I’m sorry, what?”

“If I promised to love you,” Jack said, with a patience and exactness that made his words sound much more serious than this hypothetical conversation probably deserved, “would you sell me your soul for that?”

Pitch tilted his head curiously. “Wouldn’t you already have it?”

Jack’s smile was so much more gentle now. “That would be if you,” he pointed at Pitch, then himself. “Loved me.”

Pitch took a second, but conceded. “So it would.”

“If anything,” Jack continued, “it would be like you owned my soul.”

Pitch shifted his weight and released the handle of his bike to set that hand on his hip. If every romance novel ever written was to be believed, then that was not untrue. Many questions sprang to Pitch’s mind. “Is this a line you usually use to pick people up?”

Jack barked a surprised laugh. “You know, actually, I’ve never tried it quite like this before.”

Pitch wasn’t sure he believed that. “Why would you purchase a soul just to give yours back?”

“Well, because I wouldn’t actually be giving mine, since I don’t really have one to give, but also,” Jack’s eyes had rolled up as he thought, his arms sort of half-crossed, half-gesturing as he worked through the logic. It was kind of endearing. “‘Cause it would be nice, right? Being in love? Loving someone and knowing they wouldn’t leave you?”

Pitch supposed he could see the appeal, put like that. It was a little bit psychotic and a lotta bit problematic, but alright, in a fantasy sort-of assumed consent kind of way, loving someone and knowing they wouldn’t leave you was nice. “But can you love if you’re missing your soul?”

Jack bit his lip, looking very pleased. “You sure can.”

“You sound very confident,” Pitch mused. This whole conversation was very strange. To imagine Pitch wouldn’t be having it if he’d missed that nail. “So if I sell you my soul, you’ll promise to love me forever?”

“Well, as long as you live,” Jack said. He seemed wholly unconcerned about that. “And you’d have to wait ten years, of course. Soul contracts always come with a grace period before they start.”

“Oh, of course.” Pitch pressed his hand to his chest dramatically. “I never meant to rush. How could I forget that deals with demons have a decade delay? How foolish of me.”

Jack’s smile widened and he pushed away from the streetlight. “I really like you.”

Pitch was flattered and a little bit shocked. His hand drifted down from his chest. “After only one conversation?”

Jack shrugged carelessly. “Sometimes you just know.”

His steps didn’t stop. Pitch wasn’t sure what to do, but with his bike to steady, he couldn’t exactly retreat. Or, at least, not without being terribly obvious about it.

“Sometimes you’re wrong.”

“Yeah,” Jack breathed, now close enough that he didn’t have to speak at full volume for Pitch to hear him. He finally stopped at a very polite, but very forward, distance. Pitch wasn’t sure what to do. “But I don’t think I am.”

“You don’t even know me.”

Jack’s smile looked so very pleased.

“So just to recap,” he said, and Pitch was sure from his expression, from his body language, that he was having so much fun with this, “If I promise to love you, with all my heart, ten years from now of course.”

Pitch found himself muttering, “Of course,” but he didn’t know why.

“Then you’ll give me your soul?”

He wasn’t sure why this needed a recap. It was all hypothetical, wasn’t it? There was no way Jack was actually going to love him in ten years, especially not if they didn’t… see each other between then and now. But those were the terms they had discussed, weren’t they?

“I suppose I’m not doing anything with it.”

Jack laughed, but he was shaking his head. And moving forward again. “Good answer, but that’s not how contracts work. You have to say yes.” Jack looked up and met his eyes very intently. “Or, you know, ‘I do.’”

“I do?”

Jack nodded. “You do.”

Pitch wasn’t sure why he was saying anything at all, but Jack was very close now and Pitch… wanted to. “Yes.”

“Excellent.”

Pitch gasped. Cold fingers pressed against the side of his face, and he wondered when Jack’s hand had gotten that close. His palm tilted Pitch’s face, and now he knew what Jack wanted. What he wanted, too, if he was honest. It was a silly deal to make, there was no way it was real, but it seemed real, and this felt real, and Jack really didn’t seem all that young, anymore.

Pitch’s hand found its way to Jack’s waist, thin and solid, and that was all the grounding he needed to make a decision, to lean down and take Jack’s lips with his.

It was a chaste kiss, tentative, very unsure, but lingering, and sweet. So sweet, light, like a first love or a New Year’s promise. It filled his chest and made it hard to breathe, and Pitch hadn’t shared a kiss like that in… a while.

Jack, the nymph, licked his lips once then pulled away. It was a terrible tease, but since Pitch wasn’t sure what had come over him in the first place, it was probably best it stay that way. He wasn’t in the habit of kissing strangers on the street and yet, here he was.

“See you in ten years, then,” Jack said as he drifted out of Pitch’s hold. He waved, a flirty little flip of his hand, then started down the street and into the darkness.

Pitch shook himself. Wait, what? “You’re joking?” He wasn’t serious. He was leaving?

“Oh no,” Jack turned back with a secret smile. “We sealed it with a kiss. That means it’s a deal.” He closed one eye in a slow, seductive wink, and only then did Pitch notice the unnatural glow in his bright, blue eyes. They were lit from within by a cold burning fire. Under the streetlight, he never could have guessed. But out in the dark... Jack looked otherworldly. “Your soul is mine, Sweetheart.”

Jack…

Had he really been a demon all along?

“Don’t get too old,” Jack said. He spun slowly on his feet and continued along the street. “I like ‘em spry.” His laugh echoed between buildings on the deserted street. “But I’ve got a good feeling about you. I might even already love you.”

He was insane, surely. Pitch gaped as he watched Jack simply leave him behind after all of that, but between one shadow and the next, he was gone, and there was nothing left to watch.

Pitch wondered what that meant for his soul.

#thebunni #rotghalloween2020 #blackice rotg #blackicerotg #jack frost #pitch black #rise of the guardians #DEMON AU

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moorsmonster · 5 years

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Stop. Hating. On. Violet.

Okay so.. I've seen a lot of hate going around on Instagram and YouTube about Vi. Look, you can dislike her, even hate her I don't care, but it's time to fucking stop. This is not funny.

1. "Violet looks like a meth addict"

Excuse me?? For one whole year, she thought her girlfriend was DEAD. She probably has depression or/and insomnia. She's literally just sad, not a fucking meth addict.

2. "Violet doesn't have an ass 💀"

Shut up. Just shut up. Who cares??? Stop bodyshaming Violet. (Ps. usually the people who say this are drooling over Clem's ass.)

3. "Violet looks like a stick"

They've been surviving. In the apocalypse. For years. They don't always have food. I have an angsty headcanon that Violet refused to eat when Minnie "died", maybe she lost weight then. Or perhaps she was just thin before the apocalypse too??? It's not that hard to grasp.

4. "Violet's hair looks like it's about to fall out LAWL!"

It's... It's literally not. How.. How does it look like it's about to fall out?? Like I don't understand. I am fine with the mop hair meme, I actually laughed at that, it's just an innocent meme. But saying that she's a meth addict, and her hair is about to fall out. That's not just "haha funny right" jokes. It's bullying. I'm not a sensitive person. But I had enough of this shit. Parts of this fandom are so toxic. Let's not talk about the other insults Violet gets. I'm full of this shit.

#twdg #twdg s4 #twdg season 4 #the walking dead #the walking dead season 4 #the walking dead game #twdg clementine #twdg violet #the walking dead the final season #violet #clem x violet #violentine #twd violet

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skarletterambles · 5 years

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Mummy re-(re-re-re-)watch blog

Because sometimes self-care is rewatching your favorite movie for the first time in many years, I’m currently enjoying The Mummy (1999) on a nice big flat screen TV and eating pizza. Life is good.

Random thoughts typed while watching (so expect typos) below...

[Disclaimers: Obviously, this post contains massive spoilers for a 20-year-old movie, if anyone actually needs to be told that. There are spoilers for The Mummy Returns, as well. Also, I’m an unapologetic Imhotep fangirl so don’t expect me to talk about him like he’s some kind of villain. That’s just silly! Ahem. I have the hots for Rick and Ardeth, too, though, so the drool will be spread out a bit.]

..............................

Imhotep’s priests really got the raw end of the deal. They were just there to watch the door and make sure nobody interrupted their boss’ booty call, and they ended up witnessing regicide and then getting mummified alive. Dang.

I bet the noise of the battle with all those horses and guns above him irritated Imhotep. No wonder he sent sand jets up to scare away Rick and the others. Damn kids, get off my lawn--er, necropolis!

Honestly, the havoc Evy wreaked on her library only made it look slightly worse than my workplace this summer. :p At least she didn’t have to worry about DVD shelving... [Only I get this reference, but trust me, to me it’s hilarious, in a “if I don’t laugh I’ll cry” kind of way.]

Rick is damn good-looking when he’s all bedraggled and beat up, and even better looking when he cleans up. The look on Evy’s face when she sees him after a haircut and a change of clothes, well... Same, girl. Same.

Beni is one of my favorite comic relief characters of all time.

The Med-Jai wouldn’t have threatened Evy on the boat if they knew she was the reincarnation of their long-dead boss’ daughter. I’m picturing Seti in the afterlife facepalming...

I had forgotten how hostile and scary the Med-Jai were at first.

It’s amazing how much of the dialogue comes back to me, though. Even throwaway background lines like Jonathan complaining about the price of the camels.

Evy’s sheer joy over everything camel-related is so freaking adorable.

That first chitter of scarab beetles...my least favorite part of the movie. Heh.

I can just imagine Imhotep in his sarcophagus, feeling the first hint of movement around him in over 3,000 years, and then freaking out as his sarcophagus falls through the ceiling and goes THUMP on the ground. And then there’s screaming and everyone leaves. He’d be like, WTF?

“He must have been someone of great importance...or someone who did something very naughty.” Both correct, Evy...

It’s so not fair that Ardeth can be that drop-dead sexy-looking and have such a sexy voice.

And here’s that “I...AM A LIBRARIAN!” line that everyone in my line of work loves so much. Heehee...

Mummy: *bursts out of sarcophagus* Evy: “Gah, I hate it when these things do that!” LMAO

Of course Imhotep scratched “Death is only the beginning” into the inside of his sarcophagus lid like a bored emo kid in study hall.

“If you dry that fella out you might be able to sell ‘im for firewood!” As I’m sure the writers knew, they actually did burn mummies to fuel trains back in less enlightened times. And grind them up for medicine and paint and all kinds of stupid, disrespectful things.

I love how they refer to Imhotep as “our friend” and “our guy” when they’re discussing how horrible his curse was. That sympathy fades quickly enough once they meet him, though.

“Probably got a little too frisky with the Pharaoh’s daughter.” No, Rick, that’s you. Bwahahahaha!

“No harm ever came from reading a book.” Evy, you’re a librarian. You should know better.

Poor Imhotep must have been so stiff after not moving for a few thousand years. I bet he had to do some stretches before he went looking for people to drain life force from.

Forecast for today: mostly sunny with a 90% chance of locust plague.

Gotta love Imhotep’s one-track mind. Woke up for the first time in 3k years, just regained sight and speech, and the first freaking thing he does is assume the first woman he sees is Anck-su-Namun. Because of course he does.

I wonder if Ardeth got any backlash from the rest of the Med-Jai for giving the interlopers a chance to leave Hamunaptra. If he had just slaughtered them all the previous night, none of this mess would have happened.

“He will never eat. He will never sleep. He will never stop.” Awwwwwyeah.

Because he looks so rotted, Imhotep looks threatening as he slowly advances on Beni, but if he was fully regenerated I bet his expression would have been confused and even slightly amused at Beni’s religious roulette, something along the lines of “WTF is this idiot doing?”

Imhotep, did you really need to wear a mask to meet a blind guy? (I know, I know, he needed the disguise to get through the hotel, but it’s still funny.)

He was even polite enough to thank Evy for saving him from undeath. What a nice mummy!

Med-Jai discussing Imhotep and Anck-su-Nam: “Even after 3,000 years, he’s still in love with her.” Evy: “Well, that’s all very romantic, but...” Me: “Yes. Yes it is. Shut up.”

“You came back from the desert with a new friend, didn’t you, Beni?” One of my all-time favorite lines, and one I randomly quoted to my late goldfish, Benny, many times over the years. LOL

Couldn’t Beni have found some better clothes for Imhotep to wear? Those ragged robes make him look like a beggar. Although considering he was running around in nothing but a few wisps of rotten bandages before, they couldn’t afford to be choosy.

The casual way Imhotep chews that scarab beetle that crawled into his mouth is such a power move. LMAO

The longing in his voice as he whispers Anck-su-Namun’s name almost makes up for the fact that he kissed Evy right afterward. I know you’re impatient to get your girlfriend back, man, but control yourself. :p

Another classic bit: Evy, trying to translate hieroglyphics: “Patience is a virtue!” Rick, looking at incoming torch-bearing mob: “Not right now it isn’t!”

The crowds chanting “Im-ho-tep” are so iconic, and the way they part to let him pass gives me shivers.

“It’s the creature!” Thanks for the reminder, as he’s now fully regenerated and looking damn fine.

OMG that little smirk Imhotep gives to Rick as he turns to walk away with Evy... Imhotep isn’t stupid. He can see Rick’s in love with her.

Ardeth wearing that flight cap and goggles, grinning as he rides on the plane’s wing, is the funniest damn thing in the movie. It’s such a departure from his usual demeanor, which is what makes it work so well from a comedic perspective.

Why did Imhotep stop the sand vortex so far from Hamunaptra? He could have deposited himself, Beni, and Evy on the doorstep, but instead he stopped on the other end of the valley. I mean, sure, it gives plenty of room for the famous sand wall attack scene, but it was still weird.

Evy: “Stop it! You’ll kill them!” Beni: “That’s the idea.” Well...YEAH!

Beni to Imhotep: “I loved the, uh, sand wall trick, it was beautiful. Bastard.” That’s funny enough, and then you remember that Imhotep doesn’t understand English, and it’s even funnier. Stop trying to brown-nose a man who doesn’t speak your language, Beni!

The whole Winston subplot always seemed so pointless. Just deus ex machina to get the airplane in there. Honestly, that’s my only complaint about the movie.

Yeah, Imhotep, you had better bow back when your newly-risen priests bow to you. You owe them big time after the shitstorm you dragged them into.

OMG Ardeth is even more gorgeous in the glow of gold artifacts. Heehee...

And then some of Imhotep’s priests barely rise from the ground before being mowed down by machine gun fire. Damn, they get the short end of the stick every time, don’t they?

One second I’m like, “Oh hai Anck. You need to moisturize better, lawl,” and then the next Imhotep strokes her face with such tenderness and whispers her name and I’m like, “Awwwww!” That’s what’s so much fun about these movies. There’s the silly, campy fun intertwined with actually poignant, emotional moments, in perfect balance.

I just noticed that Anck-Su-Namun’s reaction to being resurrected both in the prologue and later as a mummy was the same gasp and fluttering of her hands over her collarbone. Neat detail.

There’s this little glimmer of “Whoa, cool, I did that!” sometimes when Imhotep uses his powers. It’s adorable. (Yes, I just called an undead plague-bringer summoning mummified soldiers to kill his enemies “adorable.” I warned you in the disclaimer.)

I love how Anck-su-Namun’s first response when waking up was to try to beat the crap out of Evelyn/Nefertiri. Old habits die hard, y’know. She was probably disappointed that her opponent didn’t remember the old ways of combat...yet.

I hate that poor Imhotep had to watch the love of his life be killed in silhouette twice.

And again he promises, “Death is only the beginning.”

Then it’s time for one last moment of Ardeth being hot beyond all reason, some Rick and Evy kisses, Jonathan getting a face full of camel breath, and a happy ending for at least those four characters. ;)

The end...for now!

#the mummy

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nurseconscience · 6 years

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THE MUN WATCHES. THE RESIDENT 2x03

I REALLY love the way this episode is shot. The style works so well. Lots of flashbacks that warm my soul.

Spoilers below the cut.

I am so here for Nic and Conrad having met at a bar the weekend before he and Irving started as interns. DYING.

NIC CAN PLAY POOL LIKE A FORKING BOSS. YAAAAASSSSS.

( I can just see her playing tricks in college and taking all the dumb boys money. Here for it. )

I love that Conrad’s dad is super not confident in HODAD starting his own saline manufacturing company.

ALL THESE FLASHBACKSSSSSSSSSS Nic already telling Conrad breaking the rules is bad and not okay. Also not to snap at her because he needs people like her aka the nurses. Hells yeah. You tell him.

“8:00. Friday.” LAWL. NIC STEALING HIS ATTEMPT TO ASK HER OUT. YAAASSSS.

I might die this episode. We get Nic/Conrad flashbacks and then Marshall/Dr. Bell scenes. This is beautiful.

Laughing at AJ ‘not being able to use the Titian’. That was great.

Annnnnnnd my family refuses to stop trying to distract me as I try and watch this. :/

Ooooh. so what bad time in her life was Conrad there for? FLASHBACK TIME. Did she have a miscarriage or something??

OH MY GOD.

THIS ADDS SO MUCH MORE MEANING TO THAT EPISODE IN SEASON ONE.

OH. I HAVE THE FEELS. I CAN NOT WAIT TO LOOK INTO THIS AND EXPAND NIC. ( there shall be lots of trigger warning tags in future apparently. )

Marshall calling out all of those guys and their bad hospital running. Yaaas.

Aw Pravesh and Julian’s first fight.

Oh Nic. #feels Conrad’s face though. Nic second guessing things suddenly because of these patients. I was here for her thinking of her and Conrad at first because yay cute flashbacks but now not so much. GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD. People CAN change. Just not everyone.

There is so much happening in this episode, guys.

LOL. They gonna HOUSE it up. House call time.

I love that Marshall is like dad-ing Bell right now. ‘No I wasn’t undermining you’

Ooooh

What happened at the 404 Tavern.

NIC IS A forkING NERD. I AM SO HAPPY FOR IT.

OOOOHHHH. OKAY. Got it. Conrad’s crazy snapping and becoming a bit violent with guys that threaten her. And something about him bottling things up and then exploding. Which he def does. But what happened after the miscarriage?? I want to know.

NIC AND CONRAD’S TALK ABOUT PEOPLE CHANGING EARLIER IS MAKING CONRAD BE NICE TO HIS DAD. HAPPY. I like this.

Also, I am legit wearing the same color pants as Conrad. I’m laughing so hard right now. REDDDDD.

Uh oh. Julian and Devon are dancing. This already feels super awkward. Like...they cute. But he engaged. So this a problem. LAWL. She spun him.

Oh do we have time for one more sceneeeeee? YES. YES WE DO. MORE POOL AT THE CLUB.

NIC HAS A 12 GAME LEAD ON CONRAD.

Uuuuhhhhhhhhhh.....that promo. Conrad did a thing he shouldn’t ( per normal ) and now he might have to pay the price. I don’t like this. I am assuming the patient did not survive or is hurt horribly from whatever it was. Because that would be the only reason I could think of for someone suing. ( Though I really hate the culture of people suing doctors that is always shown in the States. I can not stand people that sue just to get a payout when someone saved their life. That just bothers me so much. I am sure there are cases where it might be at least partially warranted but when someone sues for millions it’s just so ridiculous. )

Definitely rewatching this on break tomorrow at work.

#☤ ┊ THE MUN WATCHES. / ◜ ❝ too many shows to little time ❞◞#the resident spoilers #the resident

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sullybot · 6 years

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Pretty in Pages Part 13/? (Kandomere x OC RP)

HELLO WORLD! So, I was a total slacker the last few days. Didn’t update, sorry about that. I had planned to do it on the weekend but my brain had absolutely no patience for this kind of thing? So... I made bread instead. LAWL. Anywho, part 13 has arrived my friends. As always, written with @theperlerbeadqueen and myself. Enjoy guys! If anyone wants added to the tag list just message me or comment and ask, I’ll be glad to add you. Also, to those that asked. I have been adding the “Keep Reading” splits to my posts, but for some reason they haven’t been showing up on mobile? So, I apologize if they don’t show up, but, I am trying to figure out what is going on with that.

Beginning | Previous | Next |

Kandomere came down the stairs from his bedroom not long after she started breakfast. He was wearing a very nice, flat black suit with vest and tie, per usual. He was buttoning his sleeve cuffs as he walked into the kitchen. He smiled, but it hurt. His chest felt tight and his heart seemed to sink. He didn’t know the last time his house felt lived in, like it was a home. He hoped that she would forgive him for what he had to do.

“Good morning.” He said quietly, pouring himself a cup of coffee before quickly eating some of the food she had prepared. He sighed and straightened out his coat, making sure he had his multiple phones and pagers before looking at her. “Are you ready?”

The drive to work was almost complete silence. He went into his office and didn’t request anything for the entire day. He did not page her once, for anything. He filled out the proper paperwork to have her internship transferred across town, outside of the elf district, to his colleague, Monteguh. He knew that his friend and partner would treat her well and also continue to make sure she received payment for her efforts. More importantly, it would still look good on her experience for time served. It would still be within the same division of the FBI and would look much better than her being terminated.

Violet murmured a good morning as she finished the dishes and laid them out to dry before joining him at the table. She ate as quickly as she could and then set the dishes in the sink, nodding her head gently, “I am.” she said simply, picking up her coat and her purse before following him out to his car. She remained quiet the entire ride, following him inside but keeping a little bit of a distance, trying to make it look like they hadn’t come to work together. She wanted to talk to him all day, but decided that it was simply better if she didn’t.

So for the majority of the day she didn’t bother him, only sending him small emails to remind him of his appointments or phone calls he was supposed to make, including checking on Alexeena. By the time five o’clock rolled around she was mentally drained, and just wanted to go home. Glancing back at his office door she sighed, sending him another quick email that told him she was going to go home a little early today, and try to catch up on her sleep. Hitting send she stood up and slid her arms into her jacket, adjusting the thin coat over her dress shirt before she picked up her purse and slung it over her shoulder. Shutting down the computer she turned off her desk lamp and headed for the door.

Kandomere responded to her emails, but only enough to let her know he did receive them. He did what he needed to do, answering questions from his superiors as to why he wanted to transfer his intern without her previous consent. He felt a little bit guilty about it. Once the transfer went through, she would only have two choices. Transfer, or quit. She wouldn’t be able to stay with him. He had listed his reasoning as ‘conflict of interests’. It seemed more professional than the truth. He got her email that stated she was leaving for the day and he let out a deep sigh, closing his eyes tightly. He wanted to tell her what he was doing, but he knew she would argue. She was going to hate him either way. He hoped that it would at least be temporary. It would take a few days, maybe even weeks, for this paperwork to pass through all of the proper channels. She would eventually get the notification from her school regarding her transfer. He figured he would know immediately when she received this notification, because she would have questions.

Alexeena was growing very impatient with this Elvish Hospital. Her right wrist was in a leather strap, holding her securely to her hospital bed. If it weren’t for Nick being allowed to stay by her side, she did not know if she could stay here. She hated all of the doctors, even though they were kind to her and to Nick. Mostly, it was hard to see her mother after all of this time and to have her act like nothing ever happened between them. She sighed as she looked up at the TV mounted on the wall, clicking the remote repeatedly with her left hand. Nothing was worth watching, but keeping her hand busy made her feel better. She wanted to go home, but there were still black veins across her skin, even though it had been four days. She did not have the patience for this. She wanted to go home. She wanted to go back to work. She wanted to be literally anywhere but here.

Violet exhaled slowly and sadly through her nose as she got on the elevator and took it down to the main floor, heading outside to catch her bus home. She looked at her cell phone once she was home and comfortable, honestly debating sending him a text message, but she thought better of it and put it on the charger and hopping in the bathtub, doing her very best to resist the urge to touch herself while thinking about him. Instead she read a book, and tried not to think about a handsome blue eyed elf that was rapidly stealing her heart.

Nick had dozed off slightly in his chair next to Alexeena’s bed, his head lolling to the side slightly as he dreamed about going home with her and sleeping in a real bed, even if they did have to share it with Maggie. Ward had been filled in on the need to know details finally, and was watching Maggie at his house with his wife and daughter for him so he didn’t have to go home as often to check on her. He jolted slightly from his sleep when a particularly loud commercial came on the TV. “I’m awake!” he snorted and rubbed his face with his hand, blinking and looking around the room in a daze until he fully woke up. Glancing from the TV to Alexeena he sighed, slipping his hand out to lay on her thigh, “The books I brought you not good enough?” he asked softly, sliding his hand into hers that was strapped to the bed, wishing he could undo it and let her free, but he had been given strict instructions not to let her out of that bed, and he wasn’t about to be yelled at by her mother.

Kandomere didn’t go home that night, but rather, fell asleep at his desk. That is, until his phone went off. It was Monteguh. There was a possible Bright situation. He groaned and looked at the clock, it was half past midnight and he agreed to come to the location. He went out and got into his car, driving off with his sirens blaring on the top of his car.

Alexeena looked over at Nick boredly. There were still black veins in her iris’, causing her lovely blue eyes to look dark gray. “I’ve already read them.” She said softly. She released the remote and squeezed his hand in hers. “I hate it here. Everything smells like elf. I know that they are all being kind because mother and Kandomere are forcing them to be. I can tell that they hate me. They like you better than they like me. I am seen as a traitor here. Ever since I murdered my ex husband in cold blood. I should have done the civil thing and just gotten a divorce, like Kandomere did…” She laughed bitterly before raising her hand to stroke Nick’s cheek. “Thank you… For staying here with me. I know it must be hard for you, being here, surrounded by us…”

Nick gave her a deadpan look as she spoke, leaning his head into her touch on his cheek and shaking his head gently, “I don’t care where I am. As long as you’re here, this is where I will stay. They don’t say harsh words and they don’t feel the need to belittle me at every turn. It’s better than work.” he teased her playfully but reached out to cup her cheek in return, “You are healing slowly, and they don’t want to let you go until all of the remnants of magic poisoning is out of your system. And I don’t want you to either, until I know for sure you will be ok.” he murmured.

“You’re my world, Alex. In this little bubble. I’ll get you some new books when I go home, something you probably haven’t read.” he assured her and slid his hand into her soft purple hair, “I’ll always be here when you need me. Promise.” he dipped his head further to kiss her lightly, brushing his nose against hers before he leaned back to look down at her, “Would you like me to find something to entertain you?”

Alexeena couldn’t help but laugh when he compared the hospital to work. “I thought things were getting better at work, Nick?” She questioned softly. “I thought that… after the incident… Things were getting better for you and Ward? More Orc applicants, less crooked cops?” She questioned sadly before kissing him back, tears filling her eyes slightly when he said that she was his world. “I know…” She said sadly, a tear sliding down her pale cheek. “And you are mine…” She said, though the words pained her. She knew she would outlive him by millenia, and that was something that could not be stopped. “More books would be nice, but you don’t have to entertain me. I’m just glad that you are here, keeping me sane.”

Nick softly chuckled and brushed his thumb over her her cheek, “They are. A couple of the guys still like to razz me every once and a while, but usually one look from Ward gets them to shut up. I was only trying to make it sound more glamorous here.” he admitted sheepishly and stood up, climbing into the hospital bed with her and drawing her close up against his chest, wiping the tears from her cheek.

“Don’t think about it.” he whispered, knowing exactly why it was the tears had started, his hands caressing her soft skin and tucking her hair behind her ears, “We have a long time together… and it’s only started. There is no sense in dwelling on what the future holds, at least not at this very second. We’ll figure everything out in time. I promise.” he laid his cheek against the top of her head, his fingers drawings swirls on her bare arm as he closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose, “Next time I go home I’ll bring more back with me. Keeping you entertained is better than listening to the constant flipping of channels.” he teased her playfully, giving her arm a light tickle and pressing his lips to her forehead.

Alexeena laughed softly after he dried her tears and crawled into the bed with her. She leaned against him, nuzzling her head beneath his chin while he spoke. “I will do my best not to think about it, but it is kind of hard not to. I have lost lovers before.” She murmured softly before feeling a little sheepish when he mentioned the licking of the channels. “Sorry.. I like to keep my hands busy if the rest of me isn’t doing anything. Could you maybe bring me a notebook and some pens? Maybe I’ll do some writing of my own while I’m stuck in this neon lit, elvish run, torture chamber.” She said with a playful smile before looking up at him. “Have you heard from Kandomere at all..?”

Nick couldn’t help but laugh at her teasing about the torture chamber, but nodded, “Of course. I’ll bring a set of them for you too. Perhaps the world needs a little more Alice Hepbern in their lives.” he whispered to her playfully before pressing a kiss to her temple, “It’s alright, ha rega.” he whispered, “I know you have. But this is a different time. We don’t know what will happen in the next four hundred years… but anything could be possible.” he mused and then blinked slightly, “He did ring once, while you were napping earlier, nothing really important, just to ask how things were going. Wanted to know how your progress was. He was going to see if there was anything that could be done to speed up your recovery.”

“Something is on his mind.. I can feel it…” Alexeena said quietly, tracing her fingers across Nick’s palm. “I always refer to him as my elder brother, because he is, but we are twins. He is only a few minutes older than me. It’s funny to think how different we are… But how connected we have always been…” She murmured quietly. “Something has changed and it worries me…” She said before closing her eyes. “I hate how tired I am… All the time…” She murmured before falling asleep almost instantly.

Nick caressed her hair gently, nodding his head, “I know. I think so too. But he will tell us when he is ready.” he assured her and pressed her head against him, his fingers slowly riding up and down her arm as she fell asleep against his chest, “It’ll be awhile before you start to feel like yourself again. Try to rest… I’ll be here with you, I promise.” he murmured. He felt drained, but he wouldn’t leave her to go anywhere unless she was awake and he could tell her he was going. He didn’t want her to wake up without him there… things could get bad very quickly for the nurses if he was gone when she awoke.

Kandomere had made it a point to stop by and see Alexeena,after two days of unexpected field work. He still hadn’t heard a peep from Violet, so he assumed that she did not get her transfer email yet. He got to the hospital and was immediately lead to his sister. No one even asked him who he was or who he was here to see. Everyone knew, without question. When he arrived in the room, he found Alexeena to be asleep and Nick in the bed with her. He was surprised that it could hold the weight of an Orc, seeing as it was built to support elves. He smiled at Nick and nodded his head slightly when her entered the room, with a small paper bag in his hand. “Hello, Officer Jakoby.” He said politely before stepping forward and sitting down in Nick’s chair. “I’ve brought these for her. There are a couple of books, and a few snacks. I know that hospital food isn’t always the greatest. I’ve brought some food for you, also. I didn’t know what you liked so I just… Grabbed a few things.” His demeanor was friendly and charming, not the stone wall that Nick was used to.

Nick looked up from his gentle affections when he heard the door open, raising his eyebrow and chuckling softly at the sight before him, “Agent Kandomere.” he said gently, “Hello. You just missed her. She fell asleep a few minutes ago… said you were hiding something and she didn’t like it, and then she was out like a light.” he mused with a soft sigh, looking over at the paper bag, “Thank you. The food here is pretty deplorable, even for an Elvish hospital. Snacks are always welcome. I’m not picky, so long as it isn’t anything beef related.” he smiled in amusement at his own little joke before turning to look at Kandomere again, “She is right though. Something has changed with you. Since when do you bring anything for me unless it's a bribe?” he joked, leaning back against the raised back of the bed and shifting to get more comfortable with Alexeena by his side.

“Ah… No. No beef.” Kandomere said, feeling lucky that he had grabbed chicken and fish related dishes. “I didn’t know you didn’t eat Beef.” He said, making a mental note of that, right before Nick accused him of hiding things, or that Alexeena had accused him. “She’s not wrong.” He murmured softly, gazing over at his sister, reaching out to squeeze her hand before standing and looking over at Nick. “I have always admired her uncompromising values. I wish that I were as brave and confident as she is.” He explained quietly. He looked back to make sure the door was closed before speaking again. “I seem to have found myself in a little bit of a mix up. No. It’s a full blown mess. I’ve made a very terrible mistake. I’ve developed feelings for a lovely, brilliant young woman. She’s perfection and I can’t help myself when I am around her. It has been a long time since I’ve lost control like this. She has a hard life. All I want to do is take care of her, but I can’t. She will die if I do. There are too many people alive who want to hurt me, and are willing to do anything it takes to get under my skin. I have to send her away… Far away. I’m not willing to risk her life. Not like Alexeena is willing to risk yours.”

Nick smiled slightly when Kandomere seemed rather awkward about the beef question, “Most orcs don’t. It does weird things to us.” he admitted before clearing his throat and stroking Alexeena’s hair as he thought about what Kandomere was telling him, “It sounds like you love her.” he said gently, tilting his head to the side slightly, “But you want to know something?” he murmured, looking down at Alexeena, “I used to feel like I had to protect her, but… I know she protects me far more than I protect her. She has never been willing to risk my life. When she woke up she yelled at me. Cursed and spit and practically foamed at the mouth, telling me what an idiot I was for rushing into a battle I could never win on my own. She calmed down after a little while… but she has never once been willing to risk my life. Her own, yes. But never mine. No matter how much I tell her I do it every day.” he sighed and glanced over at Kan, “You know… that if this girl cares about you, like you do for her, how devastated she will be, when she finds out you plan to send her away? Secrets begat liars, and liars lose what is important to them.” he said gently.

“I’m not telling you how to live your life… just trying to offer some insight. If you really cared about this girl, you would let her decide what she’s willing to risk, instead of making up her mind for her.”

“Ah, yes, but there is a large difference you seem to have overlooked, Nick.” Kandomere said quietly, using his first name for the first time. “My love interest isn’t an Orc, or a Cop. Fuck…” Kandomere sighed. He very rarely swore. He was always so composed that the idea of curse words hardly crossed his mind. “She’s not even an elf… She’s a human. A human girl going through law school, just… trying to get by…” He said before shaking his head. He ran his fingers through his hair, smoothing it back from his face before looking down at Nick again. “I can’t let her stay close to me. It will ruin my reputation and hers. It wouldn’t be a good look for her or I. Really, Nick. Sleeping with my secretary would be a disaster that even the FBI wouldn’t be able to damage control. I’d lose my job. Her career would be over before it even started. I cannot keep her under my employment, not if we want to survive this.” He sighed before looking out the window, clearly deep in contemplation. “I hope I can convince her to give up her dreams, for me.” He admit suddenly. “I am hoping she will just.. Quit.. and go into the shadows. Stay with me, but stay out of sight of the public eye so that she does not become a target. Anyone close to me automatically has a target painted on their back. Especially by the Inferni. I’ve killed too many of them for them to leave me unscathed forever.”

“If she really cares about you, I’m sure she would do just about anything to stay beside you. But you have to ask her. Not just move her somewhere else without her permission and expect her to be okay with it. I understand the circumstances are different… and that you can’t be together as you are, but I’m sure there are other ways for you two to make things work. Communication is key.” he said softly, looking down at Alexeena and smiling softly to himself, before looking back up at Kandomere and sobering, still surprised by the man’s use of his first name, “Tell her that you want to take care of her. Tell her how much she means to you, that you don’t really want her to move away or never see her again. That you want her to stay.” he said softly and closed his eyes, “This is one conversation I never thought I would be having with you, Kandomere. Haven’t you been married before?” he chuckled lightly and raised his eyebrow.

Kandomere couldn’t help but to laugh at Nick’s final question after all of his advise. “For Six hundred and thirty five years.” He said before giving Nick a sort of sly smile. “As you can imagine, I’m a little bit rusty when it comes to dating. I’ve also never dated a human before. Wasn’t exactly permitted when I was a younger man. It’s still not common, but at least now it is legal.” He pointed out bluntly before sighing. “She and I will have this conversation, soon, I’m afraid. I already filed the paperwork to get her removed from my office to avoid temptation. She will not be happy with me when she receives notification of her removal. I’ll make my offer to her then… She can decide what she wants.”

“Wise man.” Nick said with a grin before reclining and laying his head on top of Alexeena’s, weaving his fingers with hers and breathing out slowly through his nose, “Yeah… at least it isn’t illegal anymore. But at least you being with a human will be more common than Alexeena being with me.” he chuckled lightly and focused on Kandomere’s face, “I wish you luck, Kandomere. And hopefully she doesn’t rip you a new asshole before you get a chance to offer her the life you want to have with her.” he said in a soft, friendly tone, stifling a yawn. Something about hospitals, and how much Alexeena slept, always made him tired too.

“I think that this will likely be the closest ‘near death’ experience I’ve had in a very long time.” Kandomere joked before nodding his head toward them. “You rest. Keep an eye on her. Have her call me if you need me to bring you anything. I am always on call.” He assured him before he left and went back to the Inferni scene where Monteguh was waiting for him. They had several suspects that were linked to the extremist organization. He sent an email from his phone to Violet, letting her know that he likely would not be in office for the next few days while they processed these suspects. He didn’t like the idea of not being in office to see her, but he didn’t have much choice. He certainly couldn’t take her with him in the field. That was a death sentence without question. He also hoped she would not get her relocation information before while he wasn’t in office.

Nick gave him a gentle smile and nodded his head to the instructions, “Good luck. You’re gonna need it.” he repeated once more before watching him leave the room. Nick then snuggled down with Alexeena and fell asleep quite quickly.

Back at home, Violet checked her email and sighed when she read the newest one from Kandomere, saying he would be out of the office for a few days on a case. At least she wouldn’t have any awkward conversations with him when he came in and out of his office. She was still sad she wouldn’t get to see him in that time.

And she didn’t see him, not the rest of that week or the first three days of the next one. By the time Wednesday came around she was worried about him, but she knew better than to bother him on a case. So instead she just managed his appointments for him while he was gone, doing her own school work and anything else she could do to keep her mind off things. That was until she got an email around lunch time that made her blood boil, and tears burn at the corners of her eyes.

A formal request from her employer, Agent Kandomere, to have her transferred across the city, to an office in the human district. The tears slid down her cheeks as she scrolled through the email, her breathing starting to come in short, rough gasps as she struggled not to hyperventilate. She wanted it not to be true, but all the facts were there, all the attached files were correct. A sob escaped her lips and she glanced around the office, covering her mouth with her hand and getting up from her desk to hurry into his office and shut the door behind herself, pressing herself against the wall and crying openly in his nearly soundproofed room. She just wanted a place to cry, to let out the emotions in her chest before they strangled her.

She had thought things were going well, that she was doing her job decently, that they had managed to keep things professional. It had been hard for her to keep her professionalism up to normal standards, but all she wanted to do was throw herself at him. But she didn’t. And now he was pushing her away further, had requested the transfer the morning after they had such a good talk, had resolved to be professional and pretend as if nothing had happened that day. Her sobs were gut wrenching and she doubled over on the couch, pressing her face against her knees and clutching at her stomach with her hands, her knuckles white as she gripped the material of her shirt harshly.

Kandomere was absolutely exhausted, more or less running on empty. He and Monteguh had interrogated twenty three people in the last week and a half, none of which were particularly cooperative. One of them had even stabbed him, which only added onto the time it took to process them. The stab was to his ribcage, but they missed anything vital. He got a couple of stitches and was sent on his way. He even stopped by to see Alexeena and Nick while he was there. He was also informed that she would be released later this week. That made him feel better, knowing she was making progress and that the use of magic wasn’t going to kill her.

After arriving back into the Elf District, he went home. It was three am on Wednesday and he was exhausted. He went directly to sleep, too tired to even take a shower. Elves had more stamina than humans, but that did not mean they could function forever without rest. He slept until around noon before forcing himself to get out of bed. He had over a weeks worth of paperwork to wade through when he finally went back to the office. He took a long shower to clean himself up and to check his stitches, which were healing nicely.

He dressed in his nice, navy pinstripe suit, with the metal decorative piece across his upper chest. He hadn’t heard anything from Violet today, and that worried him. He hoped that she wasn’t out sick. She usually was good about telling him if she wasn’t going to be in.

He got to his car and hurried into the office. He walked inside and froze. She wasn’t at her desk. His heart plummeted. He drew near and he could smell her. She had been here, recently. That was when the sound of crying filled his ears. He tried to focus on where it was coming from. He was surprised to hear that it was coming from inside his office.

His mind immediately went to the worst case scenario. He drew his gun from its holster and loaded it, cocking it before slowly approaching the large, double doors. He slowly pushed open the door, sliding his gun in first to scan the area. He was relieved but confused to see her, alone, crying on the lounger near the wall. He lowered his gun, but did not put it away.

“Jesus, Violet. What the hell happened? Are you alright?” He questioned with sincere concern in his voice.

Violet was trembling on the lounger, her knees pulled up to her chest and her face pressed into them, trying to calm herself down but she couldn’t. Why did it hurt so damned much that he was pushing her away? She heard the click of the door but it didn’t register past her soft sobs until she heard Kandomere’s voice and lifted her head from her knees to look at him. Her eyes were red and puffy, tear streaks running down her face. Her eyes hardened instantly when she saw him, his gun held at his side, “Oh, ‘What happened Violet’?” she parroted, hiccuping and shaking as she wrapped her arms around her middle and glared at him, “Why don’t you tell me, Kandomere? Tell me how… how you decided to transfer me?” she croaked out, her voice cracking from the crying as more tears slid down her cheeks without her control, “You could have just told me you didn’t want me around anymore. You didn’t have to go behind my back to do it, you could have just ripped out what little there was left of my heart in person.” she cried softly, “I… I can’t. If you don’t want me to work for you then I… I’ll find another agency to work for. You don’t have to keep me around just because you feel bad for me. Poor little Violet, a poor little human who cries at the drop of the hat and can’t afford to buy a car, can’t afford a house where she can live by herself--” another sob cut her off and she got up from the lounger, stumbling when her heel caught the carpet but she caught herself on the wall, her body shaking.

She sucked in several calming breaths before glancing over at him again. She didn’t have anymore words to yell at him, only a question. “Why?” she finally begged, the tears still coming, “Please. Tell me why. What did I do wrong? I thought I was doing good. Why?” she whispered, her knees shaking as she struggled to keep herself upright.

“You scared me to death, Violet!” Kandomere growled, not able to vocalize his legitimate fear for her when he had arrived. He unloaded his gun and put it back into the holster beneath his dress coat. He could tell by her condescending, mocking tone, that she had received the email regarding her transfer. He stood straight and locked his door behind him, listening to her verbal assault as she laid it on him. He waited until she was finished and stood up from the lounger before finally speaking to her.

His face was like stone, the way it was before they had started talking on a personal level. “Is that really what you think, Violet?” He demanded lowly, approaching her with a strong stride. “You really think that I look down on you, and that is why I am transferring you?” He demanded. He approached her, getting close, making her back up against the wall. He placed a hand on either side of her, hitting the wall hard as he did so. He wanted to make sure he had her complete and undivided attention. He knew he was inside of her ‘bubble’ but he didn’t care. “You honestly think that I would allow a lowly, sniveling child to have control over my schedules and my safety? You think I would place my trust in a human who I didn’t believe could take care of my every need at the drop of a hat? You think that because you are just starting out, struggling to take care of yourself, that it makes you lesser than me?” He growled, his face very close to hers, so that she could feel his breath against her skin.

“If you think that… You are by far the most stupid and foolish girl I have ever met in my life. I transferred you so that I would not damage your reputation, or mine. I transferred you to an office of equal significance so that it would not look like you couldn’t handle this position. I transferred you to my colleague Monteguh so that I could keep my eye on you from a safe distance, so that those around would not think that you are affiliated with me.” He said before he moved one of his hands from the wall to wipe the tears away from her cheeks with his thumb. “I transferred you because I didn’t know how long I could keep coming into this office and seeing your face at your desk… And not touch you. Not hold you against me. When I see you, I see a strong and determined young woman… But I can not help my desire to take care of you. I want to give you everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I want you to stay with me, at my home. I want you with me. Every day. All the time. I am selfish and I am cruel. I will work myself to death because I have nothing else in my life, not anymore. I have not been happy for a very long time, not until you showed up here.” He said before moving his other hand from the wall, cupping her cheeks in his large hands. “I don’t expect you to forgive me…” He said before leaning down and forcing his lips against hers roughly, as he had wanted to for what felt like centuries. He kissed her deeply, but kept his tongue inside of his own mouth, for now. He broke the kiss and pressed his forehead against hers. “But I couldn’t go another minute without having the option of kissing you. You can be mad at me. You can hate me… But I didn’t transfer you because I thought you were worthless. I transferred you because I think that you are priceless.”

Violet stood trembling by the wall, her chest rising and falling as the tears continued to stream down her cheeks, her emotions in a tangle that she couldn’t undo by herself. She was mad, she was upset, she was terrified. She didn’t want to leave him, but he was trying to force her away. “How would I know what you think when you don’t tell me? Maybe I am stupid! But I can’t read minds.” she whimpered, backing up against the wall as he advanced on her, a flash of fear coming to her eyes when his arms slammed against the wall on either side of her and pinned her to the surface, “I just wanted to be near you.” she whispered hoarsely, tears still running down her cheeks as he leaned closer and his tone got softer as he explained the real reasons he had transferred her.

A broken sob escaped her lips as she tried to wrangle the rampaging hormone troll that lived in her belly, the one fueled by her emotions that had made her yell at him, made her cry, made her feel like the world was crumbling down around her. She was quiet as he continued to explain, her chest aching with emotion and more unshed tears as she stared up into his eyes. “I’m mad at you. I don’t hate you, Kan.” she whispered roughly, her lower lip trembling when he finally went on to explain that he didn’t think he could go any longer with her in that office, sitting at her desk, and not hold her, kiss her, touch her. Her resistance was already cracking, but when he told her that he hadn’t been happy in a very long time until she came into his life, she broke. Her tears fell fat and heavy and she whimpered, her eyes slipping shut the instant his lips met hers.

She didn’t resist, she didn’t pull away. Instead, she pressed up against him, her lips melding with his as he roughly kissed her, her fingers coming up to grasp his dress shirt and cling to it, rumpling the pressed material between her fingers. When their lips parted and his forehead pressed against hers, she opened her eyes to look up at him, her tears still falling though they were not as heavy now. Sniffing roughly she squeezed his shirt in her hands and focused on his face. She was practically at a loss for words, but somehow she managed to find some, “I don’t want to go.” she whispered hoarsely, “I don’t want to be someone else’s secretary. If I can’t be yours, I don’t want to be anyone’s.” she murmured, her lips quivering, “I want to be with you, Kan. Please don’t make me go away.” she begged weakly, his words of her being priceless making the tears flow all the harder.

“You can’t stay.” Kandomere said quietly, brushing away her tears again with gently fingers. His skin was soft, as if he hadn’t worked a day in his life. “I don’t want you to give up your career.” He lied, kissing her forehead gently. “Monteguh will take good care of you. I am certain of it. You will be a wondrous help in his office. You will still get the time needed for your bar exams. Your reputation will not be tainted just because your dashing, elvish employer decided he had to seduce you.” He was trying to tease her, not that his tone showed it. He really did have an issue with his tone when it came to making jokes. “You don’t have to go to Monteguh, but it will destroy your career.” He advised her cautiously. “If you stay here with me, it will destroy both of us. Professionally.” He made sure to add that annotation. “I want you to stay with me. I don’t want you to get hurt. I have enemies centuries old. I have people just itching and searching for a way to hurt me, just because of who I am and what my job is.” He explained, his voice barely above a whisper. “If you are going to stay with me… You have to be with me. At my home. You won’t be able to have an outside job. You can work from home to stay busy if you want, but you can not leave without me, or without the bodyguards.” He continued to explain. “I want more than anything to keep you near me. That’s why I couldn’t have you in the office anymore…”

Violet whimpered gently as he brushed her tears away and told her that she couldn’t stay, that he didn’t want her to give up her career for him. They would both be professionally ruined if she stayed in the office. She didn’t want to ruin his career. She just wanted to be with him, wherever that may be, “I… I don’t have to work here.” she whispered roughly, “I just… want to be where you are.” she bit onto her lower lip as he explained that if she wanted to stay with him it would mean giving up her career, giving up everything she had worked for the last few years. She couldn’t leave the house without him or a bodyguard, because people wanted to harm him. Somehow… none of that mattered, “I do want to be with you.” she whispered softly, her body shaking as she reached up and grasped his hands that framed her face, “I only became a lawyer, because my father wanted me to.” she whispered to him, “I don’t want to be a lawyer, but it pays good. His job as one kept us fed and clothed… and I thought it would do that for me too. But it means… nothing to me.”

“If I could choose what I did, for my life… I would chose to stay at home. To be a mom, to make a house a home, like my mom did.” she murmured weakly, “I’ll be with you, stay home… only leave when you do, or bodyguards take me somewhere… if it means that I never have to leave your side.” she promised, clinging to his hands and staring up into his eyes beseechingly, “Please. Don’t send me away.” she begged once more, letting go of his hands and reaching up to cup his face, pulling him down that last few more inches to press her lips to his roughly, nipping on his lower lip and kissing him with every ounce of need she had. He was all she wanted.

“Your father took care of you and your family.” Kandomere pointed out, stroking her hair with the back of his hand gently. “Let me take care of you. I don’t care if my ideals are outdated. Please. It would be so easy for me to take you into my life. You have all the space you could ever want to work with to make the house a home. We could be parents. We could be happy. Hell, I could retire.” He joked, the proper tone finally coming out this time before he kissed her back, holding her face gently. He slid his hands down her shoulders, to her sides and to her hips. He picked her up gently and pressed her against the walls, holding her thighs, spreading her legs around his torso as he kissed her, pinned up against the wall. “You can decline the transfer and then quit…” He murmured softly. “You can drop out of college… I can pay off your student loans. You don’t have to worry about anything. You do not have to worry about wanting or needing, ever again, as long as I live.” He promised her. “The only thing I ask in return is that you stay safe. It will be annoying and you will be frustrated by it more often than not… But I need you to stay safe. If you stay safe, I can give you everything else.”

Violet whimpered against his mouth as they kissed for several long moments before pulling back long enough to look up into his eyes as he offered to take care of her, they could have babies, she could turn his huge mansion into a home, and be happy. When he joked about retiring she laughed softly as well, pressing her face against his, “You don’t have to retire.” she whispered, leaning into his hands that cradled her face until he moved them away to grasp her by the hips and lift her against the wall, drawing a loud gasp from her. She spread her legs and hooked them on his hips so that he could press up against her, pinning her to the wall. Leaning back against it she gazed up at him, moaning when he kissed her again, trembling and rubbing her hands over his chest, “I don’t care if they are outdated views. I want to be yours.” she whispered and leaned up to press her lips to his chin, pressing kisses up to his mouth where she planted another longer one, reaching up to hold his shoulders.

“I will. I promise.” she assured him and one hand cupped his cheek, her breath hitching as she squeezed her legs around him, “I will be yours, I’ll make that house ours, I’ll give you as many babies as you want.” she promised, tears dripping down her cheeks again though now they were happy, not devastated, “I’ll quit college, and decline the transfer and the job… I’m yours. Forever.” she promised in a broken voice, looping her arms around his neck and dragging him down into another kiss, her body arching up against his as her tongue brushed his lower lip.

“Slow down…” Kandomere said softly, shaking his head. “We aren’t even officially a romantic couple yet, Vi. I have only listed available options to you. I do not want you to feel obligated to give me children. I have gone this long without.” He said, kissing her forehead again gently. She pulled him down to kiss her again and a small moan passed his lips while he dug his fingers into her hips, forcing himself to ease up on his grip. He would need to frequently remind himself that she is human. She would not have the same endurance and durability that an elf woman would have, not that he really remembered much of what that was like, anyway. “You don’t have to quit college… Just don’t be a lawyer. You could take classes online, from the safety of the house. You could work from home. I don’t want to make you a prisoner. Captive and Safe do not mean the same thing.” He assured her before kissing her again. Did he really want to do this here, in his office? His logical senses told him he needed to stop, to take her home, to treat her well… However, this was silenced by the carnal instinct and craving. The feel and the smell of her, so close to him after all of this time. “Are you a virgin, Violet?”

Tag List: @cinnamonroll-issues @justanothermonstah @kandomerx

#kandomere #kandomereandoc #Netflix Bright #bright movie #bright fanfic #bright the movie #bright #nick jakoby #nicholas jakoby #fanfiction #write some fanfic #dom Kandomere #romance #fluff #angst #be prepared to cry

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theantiirishone · 7 years

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92 Truths

92 Truths Tag Game

92 Truths Tag Game Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end choose people to be tagged. Tagged by @ava-forest-walker Last: Last drink: Spearmint Tea Last phone call: My husband Last text message: My best friend Last song you listened to: What’s My Name- Descendants 2 (LAWL) Last time i cried: Couple months ago I think Have you ever: Dated someone twice: Yes Been cheated on: Yes Kissed someone and regretted it: No Lost someone special: Yes Been depressed: Yes Been drunk and thrown up: No In the past year have you: Made a new friend: Yes. A lot actually Fallen out of love: No. Fallen more in love actually Laughed until you cried: Probably Met someone who changed you: No Found out who your true friends are: A million times yes Found out someone was talking about you: Yes General: How many people on tumblr do you know in real life: 2 Do you have any pets: 3 cats and 1 snake Do you want to change your name: No What time did you wake up this morning: 6:30 What were you doing last night: Watching stuff on YouTube and playing Don’t Starve

Name something you cannot wait for: Get the hell out of this house Have you talked to a person named Tom: Not that I know of Whats getting on your nerves rn: The living situation Blood type: Not sure Nickname: Sariina Relationship status: Beyond happily married Zodiac sign: Pisces Pronouns: ...I am a female. So she/her Favourite show: Hell’s Kitchen, Ink Master College: Yes. Going for my Bachelors in Psychology Hair colour: Black Do you have a crush on someone: Yes. On my husband What do you like about yourself: Eyes, personality, and hair First: First surgery: Had my tonsils removed First piercing: When I was a baby. My aunt took me. When we got home she said to my mom, and I quote: “The little shit didn’t even cry.” First sport you joined: Soccer First vacation: Florida First pair of sneakers: Hell if I fucking know Eating: About to have cinnamon rolls Drinking: Nothing I’m about to: Reply some more Listening to: My children playing Want kids: Have them Get married: On the second one Career: Forensic Psychologist Which is better: Lips or eyes: Eyes Hugs or kisses: Hugs Shorter or taller: Taller Older or younger: My husband is younger than me so I guess younger. Romantic or spontaneous: Both Sensitive or loud: Sensitive Hook up or relationship: Hook up Troublemaker or hesitant: Troublemakers are more fun Have you ever: Kissed a stranger: No Drank hard liquor: Yes Lost glasses/contacts: ALL THE TIME Sex on first date: No Broken someones heart: Yeah Been arrested: No Turned someone down: Yes Fallen for a friend: Yes?

Do you believe: In yourself: No Miracles: Absolutely Love at first sight: Eh I’m iffy on that Heaven: Without a doubt Santa Claus: Ha no

Well there’s some more about the mun! Tagging @addictidtoyoutube @sinnersofafeather @carriageofaerietails @allison-ally-winter @dammit-dark @tattooedmuses

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leslea · 5 years

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Can Pesky Tarnation Strand Ducks?

It’s the age old question, isn’t it?

C-PTSD. Do you know what that is? I did, but I didn’t, not really.

In the 1990s when I was first diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), the psychologist who gave the diagnosis commented that “sometimes, people experience trauma after trauma, so that it’s not just one event that leads to PTSD, but a series of events.” That blew my mind.

What I’d known about PTSD up to that point was very little, but essentially it centered around “shellshock” and Gulf War Vet syndrome. I knew I had gone through a hard time, but I didn’t know that I had PTSD. I just knew I was reliving certain events wherein attempts were made on my life. I knew I was basing nearly all my daily decisions around my safety from certain people who I had not seen in years, and I knew that wasn’t normal. I knew I couldn’t sleep. I knew I wanted to sleep, so badly.

Now, a solid 20+ years later, I have learned there is an emerging diagnostic label called Complex PTSD. Unlike your run of the mill, vanilla PTSD (ha! HAAaaaa!!!) that had me crawling on the floor of my house like a Vietnam Vet afraid of Charlie, C-PTSD is the kind of situation my original therapist was describing. C-PTSD doesn’t come from just one event. It comes from a series of events, typically in childhood. There was no diagnostic test for it at the time, and it’s not yet in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), so it will probably be a few years before specialized treatments are developed for this particular bag of nuts.

So why does it matter? Why do I care? I’m a well-adjusted adult woman, I’m a good mother and wife, I am helpful and kind to neighbors and friends, I’m a good citizen, etc., etc. I’m not some nutcase, right? What does C-PTSD have to do with me? Most days there is nothing wrong with me that a little wine or chocolate can’t fix.

Here’s the thing. Upon my son’s diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder, I realized that I, too, am very likely on the spectrum. It explains a lot of why & how I process inputs the way I do. It also explains the way my memory functioned until the past eight years or so. I was never an expert on PTSD, but I felt like I had my symptoms and stress level under control, so I didn’t need to be an expert. I’m reading all the time about ASD now, and dealing with a teenager on the spectrum who is being traumatized by ongoing bullying. Parsing everything he is going through, trying to deal with his reactions (some angry and destructive), trying to shield him from disciplinary actions he does not deserve--all while waiting in limbo for our letter from BDDS so we can receive services that might help him (hey, no guarantees) to live a better life...all while mothering three other children with the same level of need as any other kid. It’s a lot. It has thrown me into autistic shutdown mode. That’s not fun, but that’s not the thing. The thing is the emotional flashbacks.

Emotional flashbacks. Emotional fucking flashbacks? Seriously? Emotional flashbacks.

Yes, they are a thing. I’ve had these from time-to-time for years, although for the past eight or nine years of marriage to Tim, I’ve had them so much less. (Funny what being LOVED by a reciprocal partner will do for your mental health, huh?) Rarely do I feel so badly that I can’t tell him how I’m feeling, but that happened over the weekend.

You know that tipping point where you feel so badly, you can’t bear the pain, and the only obvious escape is death? If you’ve never felt that way, then you are so blessed. As I’ve matured and made my life less populated with problematic people, I’ve experienced that feeling less and less. I’ve grown. Sometimes I feel strong. I remind myself when I am very low that these feelings always pass. I’m blessed to have lots of hugs and loving, sweet faces to remind me that I’ll be grateful for pushing on. I push on. Things get better. I move away from the sad episodes and do healthy things for myself--take a walk, get a massage, meditate, take my vitamins, make fresh juice, call a friend, listen to a novel on audiobook while I accomplish a household chore...it’s called self-care. I do that stuff. It doesn’t fix the wounds/scars deep down inside me, but it puts me back up on the level of human-kind. Away from the worms. Or maybe I should say the Pesky Tarnation. I do my damnedest to get past the past (ha) and be fully in the now, even if the now is extra advanced level difficulty and I’m forever a novice.

This weekend I found a book about C-PTSD. It’s an audiobook. It was quite informative. It helped me understand so much about myself, and about my problematic stress response to parenting challenges. All of this preceeding text is an introduction so I can share it with you, just in case you need it. I checked it out from hoopla on audiobook for free, but here it is on Amazon: Complex PTSD : From Surviving to Thriving: A GUIDE AND MAP FOR RECOVERING FROM CHILDHOOD TRAUMA by Pete Walker.

If you find yourself in the pages of that book, there’s also a nice reddit community I’d like you to meet: CPTSD on reddit. I don’t post there, but it has been helpful to read the stories and even to laugh at the memes.

I don’t like to lose myself in the hole of self-diagnosis and all that stuff too much. I just know that I need psychic first aid at times and in ways that no one ever talks about, no one ever demonstrates in books, movies, or songs, and I’ve never understood why. Like, I knew I had a rough start, but why couldn’t I overcome my past entirely and put all of that behind me and just be unencumbered by it? A great majority of people seem like they can do this, and I’m obviously not so dysfunctional as to require disability and full-time care or anything like that, so...why? Why intermittently break down?

I don’t know. I’m a stranded duck, sometimes, but I can, and do get past it. I don’t share this often, but sometimes, the pain is back, and it’s so loud, I can’t even speak. I can’t ask for help. I can’t tell Tim I need him to hold me. I can’t drown out the voice in my head telling me that I should just die because the pain will never get better. I certainly can’t text a friend or call someone or announce it to FB.

All I can do is get through it the best I can, until I reach a point I can apply a little bit of self-care.

Today is World Autism Day and people are posting about ASD, so here I am posting about C-PTSD, lawl, bc of course I am. My ex-husband used to criticize me for becoming defensive and angry after opening up emotionally. He wasn’t wrong. I will hit publish on this and then regret it, burning inside like I’m on fire. It will eat at me and I will feel immense shame, although I know full well I did nothing wrong, and endeavor daily to do so many things right.

If you’ve read this far, please leave a kind word. Any kind word will do.

#cptsd #ptsd #not really about ducks #world autism day #asd #what in tarnation

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magioftheseas · 7 years

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Faint of Heart

I should’ve posted this earlier, like, yesterday preferably but well, sometimes that just isn’t how it goes.

So anyway, this is just a short Island Mode fic based off a heart event from an old Harvest Moon game because those are cute and I kind of wanted to write something like that. At least I’m pretty sure that’s what I wanted when I started writing this. This is a seriously old WIP lawl.

Anyway, it’s like... Cute. Please enjoy it. :’D

Warnings: None, really. These boys got low self-esteem and aren’t the best at communicating, but that’s a given at this point in time.

**Alternate Ao3 Link**

It’s hot out, Hinata thinks as he shields his eyes from the sun overhead. The breeze blowing in from the direction of the ocean is mercifully cooler, the scent of salt accompanying the fresh green aroma of the island’s plant life. If Hinata looked over—which he did—he would see how the sun hit the surface of the ocean, causing it to glisten like light would while caught in a kaleidoscope. Only the sea rippled on its own, causing the sparks of light to shift and move, and its breeze and aroma continued brushing past him with the utmost gentleness.

Hinata would have fallen into a complete daze had he not heard a startling familiar call of his name. It occurred to Hinata, belatedly, that he would have sat down, too, and is now instead standing ramrod straight as he spots Komaeda striding up to him with a bright smile.

“What are you doing?” he’s asking cheekily, and Hinata notes he’s flushed and laughing. But there’s a raspy quality to those chuckles and Hinata’s smile stops before it can even start. Komaeda’s own grin slips when he notices, and Hinata feels the immediate need to avert his gaze. “Oh, are you alright? It’s been rather hot out... You’re not getting affected too much by the heat, right, Hinata-kun?”

“Oh, no, I’m fine. Sorry.” Hinata bit his lip, unsure of why he was feeling so troubled now anyway. Maybe because he decided to go this day alone to properly examine the island? Though the idea of distancing himself from his classmates would make Usami cry... It was just how he felt. But Komaeda’s presence far from bothered him. “I was just...stuck thinking for a moment.”

“About?” Komaeda’s wide-eyed and curious with a feline-like tilt to his head that, for some reason, makes his heart beat just a bit faster. Maybe because Hinata can’t remember the last time someone looked so eager to what he had to say—he was a listener, not a talker... But Komaeda was always so receptive...

“Uh... Stuff.”

Which is why his lame response just made him drop his gaze and flush in embarrassment. Komaeda hums, but it’s not at all judgmental—even though he still looks amused when Hinata glances back up. “Well, don’t let me keep you from thinking about your very important stuff.”

“It’s...fine. Thanks.” For what? Not making me feel like even more of an idiot? Still... Hinata perks up as Komaeda’s smile widens for him and the other turns around to be on their way. For some reason, his stomach was sinking. Why do I...?

Then before his eyes he saw Komaeda sway—for just a moment—and just like that, Hinata witnessed his classmate collapse and land with a thump muted by the soft sand. He blinked twice with momentary shock—did that just happen?—and then...

“Komaeda!”

“Heat exhaustion,” Tsumiki explained as she warily eyed a groaning Komaeda holding his head up. Hinata went to steady him, heart still racing even as Komaeda gave him an apologetic smile. “It’s been hot lately and... Um, Komaeda-san, you don’t seem well-equipped for that. I-I don’t mean anything bad by it, but...! You need to be more careful.”

“With the SHSL Nurse, I don’t have much to worry about. Thank you Tsumiki-san.” Though Komaeda’s smile and voice were kind, Hinata noted it sounded...stiffer than usual. “I’m sorry for all the trouble I caused.”

“J-Just rest for the day, Komaeda-san! I won’t have you getting ill at a time like this!” she exclaimed, her fists tightening before she wiped off her eyes with the bandages wrapped around her arms. “I-I... Even if it’s not much, I insist. Hinata-san, please make sure nothing happens. I... I’ll leave it to you!!”

“Understood. Thanks for the assistance, Tsumiki.” Hinata grinned at her, to which Tsumiki tentatively smiled in return and took a deep breath.

“Ah... Um. You don’t really need too much medicine for heat exhaustion... Just rest and water. I-If you have any questions though, feel free to ask me. I’m... probably not going to be doing anything else of worth...” With that, Tsumiki politely wished them well and went on her way with one last reminder, “Take care of yourself!”

“I’ll call you again if something else happens!” Hinata exclaimed as she left, feeling a bit of relief when she briefly turned back to nod. Her smile was still there, however small, and Hinata gave a kind wave to wish her well in return. His hand stilled when he heard a soft chuckle from beside him and he turned back to its owner.

“Tsumiki-san seems to get more assertive involving her talent, don’t you think?” Komaeda remarked, smile bright. “Either that or she’s in high moods. Isn’t that good either way?”

“...Komaeda...” Hinata’s smile dropped with Tsumiki gone. “Were you overworking yourself?”

“I suppose I was. Being the way I am, I can’t be surprised if my own body betrays me. Honestly, though, I didn’t think I’d actually faint.” His smile grows a bit self-effacing, and the way he looks at Hinata is with slight embarrassment for the display. Hinata’s jaw tightens as he continues, “I’m fine, though, Hinata-kun. Please stop looking at me like that.”

“I can’t help but be worried, you know. I’ve never seen someone collapse like that before.” And he panicked at first, cradling Komaeda in his arms and seeing his flush paling. Even though the other was heavy to carry, Hinata doesn’t think he ever ran that fast or shouted as loud as he did for Tsumiki. His arms were aching from the feat, but he’s ready to steady Komaeda if he so much as blinks the wrong way. “Komaeda, I... I don’t know if this is my place to ask... But are you sickly?”

Komaeda’s head gives that tilt again. Hinata’s face grows hot. “I... I saw you plucking a handful of pills at the supermarket once... And you, ah... You’ve always looked a bit too thin...and...pale...”

The response he gets is a weird look. “Am I really so strange that you feel the need to observe me so closely? I try not to be.”

“That’s not what I mean!” he retorts, looking anywhere but at him. “I-I’m just worried, you know? And there are things I can’t help but notice. Do you even take good care of yourself?”

Komaeda’s smile lessens. “You shouldn’t worry about that.”

“But I do worry, so that’s why I’m asking.” With that, Hinata found his ground and met Komaeda’s gaze, keeping back his blush and maintaining absolute seriousness. Komaeda finally falters a bit, and almost looks like a kid being scolded. Even if it’s an act he’s putting on, Hinata’s weak enough to soften at the sight. “Look, with all you’ve done for me when I first got here... You can’t expect me to not care about you afterwards...”

“That’d be nice though, wouldn’t it?” Komaeda asked quietly. “Hinata-kun, you’re too kind for your own good.”

“What are you saying? That’s your thing more than mine.” For a minute he sees Komaeda’s gaze dart downward at the space between their feet. Somehow, that just strengthens his resolve as he continues, “You’re always going out of your way for others. Hell, you helped me out when I first got here without a word of complaint—so I know this firsthand.”

Komaeda makes this uncomfortable sort of noise and Hinata freezes. For a moment he’s scared—did his stupid words seriously just give poor Komaeda an aneurysm—but then he sees Komaeda shaking, making the noise again as his hand clamped over his mouth...and it occurs to him that Komaeda’s just trying not to laugh at him.

At least he isn’t dying—but Hinata can’t help but get flustered and an inch closer to wanting to bury himself in a hole.

“Oh, no, Hinata-kun, I don’t mean to, ah...demean you...” Komaeda patted his arm, smile twisting as Hinata averts his gaze. “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. You just seemed so serious... That you took help from someone like me so seriously...”

“What exactly does that mean?” Hinata snapped, his blush still in full force. “You shouldn’t be self-deprecating about something like that. It’s a good quality of yours.”

“A good quality?” Komaeda’s smile fades. He seems a bit nervous himself, and Hinata nods to insist.

“That’s why you should take better care of yourself,” he continues, matter-of-factly while he’s at it. “But seeing as even you slip up every now and then, I’ll help you. If you’re feeling ill or faint again, let me know and I’ll do what I can...”

“Are you going to coddle me then?”

“I-I...! Don’t put it like that! That’s not what I mean!”

Komaeda laughs, hand daintily over his mouth before giving him a coy look. “Oh, Hinata-kun, but what about your very important stuff?”

“Hush, you,” Hinata huffed back, shooting him a glare but keeping his voice soft rather than sharp. “There are more important things to worry about right now than that...stuff.”

Komaeda’s bright smile almost takes him off guard—like perhaps the light hit it from the window across the room right at that moment or maybe Hinata decided now was as good of a time as any to hallucinate. “You really are kind, Hinata-kun. What am I going to do if I end up falling in love with you?”

If he was red now, Hinata’s positive the rest of his body from the neck down is going pale from the all the blood rushing to his face. “W-What...”

“Kid-ding! You know, you really shouldn’t take anything I saw seriously. But, ah. That’s...” Komaeda coughed into his hand, smile pulling at his lips despite actually looking a bit sheepish. “That’s an interesting face you’re making. Is the idea of such a thing really so unpleasant?”

“I never said...!” Hinata stops himself with a growl. He runs a clammy hand through his hair, still feeling his heartbeat pound hard and loud against his chest. He just hoped Komaeda didn’t notice the extent of the effect that...suggestion had on him. “I... Don’t say things like that so easily, Komaeda. We haven’t even known each other that long.”

Though I... His thoughts continued with the words he couldn’t bring himself to say. I’d like to get to know you more.

“You’re right. It’s dangerous to get so involved with someone you barely know. Be more careful, Hinata-kun!” Komaeda waved his finger at him, like it was scolding and—odd, shouldn’t that kind of caution be stated to himself?—he chuckled again, carefree and soothing the thought. “Anyway, I should get going. Tsumiki-san said to rest, so I shall. I should be able to make it to my cabin, at least.”

“...Still, let me stick around so that I can be sure you will.” Hinata offered his hand, grunting. “I’ll just walk you back to your cabin. If you have anything else you need, you can tell me on the way...”

“That’s not necessary,” Komaeda took his hand though, pulling himself up...only to stumble nearly sending the two of them to topple over had Hinata not immediately steadied them both as Komaeda’s face smacked against his shoulder.

“Weird. I find it hard to believe you,” Hinata mused, pushing him back. Komaeda quickly smiled again—all sorry and sheepish and somehow the expression had Hinata tightening his fingers into the heavy fabric of his green parka. He pulled back quickly though, mouth suddenly very dry. “W-Well. I’ll go with you anyway. Just in case?”

“Just in case,” Komaeda agreed, though it sounded...reluctant. “I hate the idea of troubling you though, Hinata-kun.”

“It... It isn’t troubling. Was I troubling you when you helped me out?”

“Oh, Hinata-kun,” he shook his head and Hinata would have made a quip had he not been stilled into silence by the sudden heaviness in Komaeda’s low, cloudy gaze. “That’s completely different.”

Somehow he couldn’t bring himself to ask how. The look on Komaeda’s face was too...indecipherable. Worrying. It also felt like something he wasn’t sure he’d ever understand and considering this was carefree happy-go-lucky Komaeda, of all people...

Komaeda who looked concerned at Hinata’s silence, and tugged his sleeve to get him back to attention. His head gave that tilt, eyes soft and wide with a small frown on his lips, and Hinata’s breath caught. Even though Komaeda says the same thing he was saying earlier, “Don’t worry about it, Hinata-kun.”

But how can I not?

“I... Shall we get going?” I don’t know what else I’m supposed to say. I’m no good at this kind of thing. And he felt bad—Komaeda’s nothing but helpful to him and others and now that Komaeda really seems to have problems; he doesn’t know how to approach it. That look on his face... I can’t think of a single thing to say when he looks at me like that... No good. No good at all. “C...Come on, Komaeda. Stick close in case you fall again.”

Komaeda nods, lips quirking up just a little but not enough for an actual smile. His grip tightened on Hinata’s sleeve before letting go, but he does stay close. Bumps shoulders with him as they walk, and despite his footsteps being near soundless compared to his stomping feet, his presence weighs heavily on Hinata’s mind.

Despite that, the time it takes to walk Komaeda to his cabin feels far too short.

“Here we are!!” Komaeda chirps cheerily, and he pulled away from Hinata to make the last bit of distance to his door on his own. Hinata watched after him, tense and cautious if he so much as stumbled, and when he did almost trip, having to catch himself on that door so that he didn’t hit anything, Hinata nearly jerked to get to him, already calling his name...

Komaeda’s bright smile as he turned back stilled him in his step, and he’s sure his heart skipped a beat. Again. It had been doing that for a while now. And even though Komaeda was the one who made that juvenile suggestion earlier, he couldn’t help but really wonder if he might just be... “You really are kind, Hinata-kun.”

Ah. This again. Hinata rubbed at the nape of his neck, feeling more shy than flustered, and quickly forced a laugh. “It’s... It’s really nothing. But, you know...” That laugh then was harsh, almost hurting his throat as he forced it, but he could care less about any pain that came with shoving the following words out after it, “If you have something bothering you, or... You just need someone to talk to... I’m...here. I might not be able to offer much advice, but if I could help you in any way Komaeda, then I wouldn’t mind if... I-If... Um...”

What else? He wondered, feeling his insides twist and drop as his mind raced. What else was I going to say? Come on, I couldn’t have lost the words already...

“Hinata-kun.” Somehow Komaeda stopped him, voice firm and raised only a little. “I appreciate it.”

Hinata nodded shakily, digging his nails into the back of his neck as he scratched. Komaeda giggles, causing his to raise his gaze just to more clearly see that fond friendly grin again on the other’s face. That face which his heart only knows to beat harder for at this point. And he really thinks...

“If I actually did fall in love with Hinata-kun,” Komaeda says, voice light, “Then I think that would ruin me.”

It was like his blood froze into needles prickling him all over, so the point he actually flinched, and the sun gleamed bright and blinding. Hinata stood there, eyes wide, and Komaeda laughed as calmly as ever.

“Ah, Hinata-kun, I was just...”

“Do you really think that?” he blurted. “Am I seriously that bad of a guy to like?”

“Oh, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda shook his head. “I didn’t mean... Well, I wasn’t really thinking, either. Please forget I said anything.”

“That... What you said is pretty hard to forget,” Hinata retorted. “What did you mean? Seriously, what the hell did you mean?”

“Um...” Komaeda looks a bit uncomfortable now. So shouldn’t he just drop it?

...He should. Komaeda had said he spoke without thinking—so maybe it didn’t mean anything. It didn’t, so—

His chest ached. It irritated him.

“I... I, just...”

I’m just pathetic, that’s what it is. His thoughts decide.

But Komaeda replies, “I didn’t mean to say anything that might reflect poorly on you. Hinata-kun is a wonderful person to fall in love with—but I’m a worthless mite who shouldn’t be in love, you know what I mean?”

What?

“....No...?”

Komaeda just laughs. “It’s unpleasant, isn’t it? You must be disgusted—the idea of someone like me holding such disgustingly delicate feelings for someone like you.”

“No,” Hinata repeats a little more forcefully. “No, Komaeda, that’s not true. Don’t assume something like that.”

“Ah, sorry,” Komaeda says, smiling sadly and pitifully. So pitifully that the ache just gets worse. “I suppose this is just greater proof of my incompetence, is it not?”

“What are you even saying?”

Komaeda doesn’t say anything at first. Then, with that calm grin, he replies, “I’ve taken up too much of your time, Hinata-kun. The gratitude I feel towards you for your assistance and kindness is beyond words. You really shouldn’t waste such things on someone like me, but... I appreciate it nonetheless.”

Hinata blinked once.

And then he scowled.

“It wasn’t a waste,” he retorted. “I told you—I don’t mind helping you at all!”

“You’re so kind,” Komaeda says softly. Again.

That word again. It... Hinata found his fists clenching, tight even to hurt as he felt his body quiver. It’s not just out of kindness that I’m like this... There’s no way... I’m...

I’m not so selfless that I’d...

“I’ll be seeing you,” Komaeda chirps. “I’m sorry for keeping you—as selfish as I’d be tempted to be with my monopolizing Hinata-kun’s attention, well... Haha, obviously someone like me doesn’t deserve... Well... It was a joke in poor taste anyway. Please, ah, forget I said that.”

I won’t forget. I won’t—

“You know...” Hinata started. “I don’t mind you monopolizing my attention.”

Komaeda blinks back at him. “I... Huh.”

“I-I’m just saying,” he stammered, ducking his head. “I don’t...mind. If it’s you, I don’t mind.”

“Oh.” A beat of silence. “How worrying.”

Hinata felt his face heat up further as he muttered, “Not...really... It’s just how I feel...”

“How you feel is worrying,” Komaeda stated so bluntly that he could have suffered trauma from it. Hell, he did flinch, feeling the words stab through him, but as he helplessly stated back, Komaeda just smiled at him again. With that cheerfully calm smile that looked—fond. Affectionate if a bit concerned. The same way you look at a cute kid who pushed themselves up and grinned widely in spite of the visible scrapes and bruises taken from the fall.

...Really, that’s how you’re going to think about it?

But... Komaeda’s smile, even if it was bright enough to hurt looking at, warmed his insides all the same. Pathetic. That’s definitely pathetic, isn’t it?

“I... It’s how I feel... And even if it’s worrying, I...” Hinata swallowed. “I’d rather worry about you than that. Komaeda, uh, please take care of yourself.”

Komaeda chuckles. More of that warmth. Hinata’s lips twisted and he wasn’t sure if it was with the urge to smile or grimace.

“Take care of yourself, Hinata-kun.”

And just like that, Komaeda had opened the door and shut it behind him. Hinata was just left staring at his door, wondering what the hell that was supposed to mean. After a while, he just shrugged his shoulders over it, deciding to just...put it out of his mind.

He should probably head back to his own cabin to sleep these thoughts off—even if Usami’s going to yell at him for it, it’s too tempting a thought to reconsider.

On the short walk back, his arms wrapped around himself as he looked down at the cobblestone before glancing slightly up at the painfully bright blue sky with a blinding sun that kept his gaze from raising any further. His heart’s pounding. His face feels hot and it’s a wonder if it’s really from the sun overhead.

Of course, he glanced back at Komaeda’s cabin. His arms tightened and he wondered, if for a brief moment—if maybe Komaeda’s feelings dared to match his own. He might not have been joking around, but... He hadn’t seemed to accept them, either, had he?

He should probably sleep these concerns off as well.

...But I swear if I end up dreaming about that guy...

He nearly stung his eyes on how quickly he whirled back around, with that stupid sun shining excessively bright, and he blocked his eyes with a scowl. His cabin was starting to look more and more idyllic by the moment. Or...something like that.

#KomaHina #HinaKoma #hajime hinata #nagito komaeda #Magi Fics #super dangan ronpa 2 #mikan tsumiki #This is....really old like probably well over a year....#I wonder if you can tell when the style shifts lawl

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solarmason-blog · 7 years

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came back to me | sebson

WHO: Mason McCarthy & Sebastian Smythe, ft Sabia WHAT: Reunited and it feels so good. WHERE: Outside Mason & Spencer’s room, a student lounge, Sebastian’s room in Notos. WHEN: Wednesday, 2/1, about 1 AM. WARNINGS: Brief mention of disturbing imagery, mention of Elliott’s attack (& the events that followed).

Sebastian was incredibly edgy. He'd flown through the night, left on the earliest flight permitted. He'd had to make promises to his father-- lies, about no longer visiting the McCarthy Compound and "straightening up" his Bloodline Act. But what mattered was that he was home. Well, not his home, per se, but Campus. NYADA. Mason. He stared at Mason's door, hands shaking. What was he going to say? An apology didn't seem to truly explain nearly a month's absence. He was so aetherdamn tired that he didn't have the energy to worry passed being able to raise his hand to knock on the door. Maybe things would be different now. Maybe Mason wouldn't be happy to see him. Or maybe things would be okay. He supposed he wouldn't know until he knocked on the fucking door. Why was such a simple motion so hard? He raised his hand and rapped twice, lightly. "Mase?" It was one AM here. He'd left Paris at midnight. But it was one AM here. What part of him said it was logical to bang down Mason's door at this hour? Mason started awake at the sound at his door - maybe just a drunk neighbor at the wrong room, but then, no, his name. Mason frowned, squinted at the time, then squinted at Sabia, who was not asleep but was definitely doing a great job pretending to be. "Some familiar you are. Could be a murderer, 'n' you don't even care," Sabia flicked he ear at him and with once more glance to completely-conked out Spencer, Mason kicked his covers off. He wasn't worried about it being a murderer - even in his mostly asleep state, he was worried that it was a friend or his sister in trouble, needing his help. What other reason was there to knock on someone's door at one-oh-three in the morning? Mason rubbed his face as he made his way to the door - he kicked something on the way, and thus it was his dully aching pinky toe that was on his mind as he opened the door. And saw Sebastian. Mason blinked. Rubbed his eyes again. Okay, so he was still dreaming. He had to be. Mason squinted at him sleepily. "Am I still asleep? 'Re you gonna grow bunny ears and hop away? Or get killed while I stand here helplessly again?" Mason yawned; his subconscious needed new material. Sebastian waited anxiously, hand moving up to grip the door frame as he heard movement inside. What was he going to be greeted with? But Mason... had no reaction. "Again?" he asked softly, confused. "Mase... babe? You're not dreaming. I'm back. I'm home." He watched as Mason yawned. Biting his lip, Sebastian reached out, touching Mason's hand gently. Would the physical touch help to make him realize he's not dreaming? That he's very, incredibly awake?

Mason frowned. "Look, if this is an illusion or some shit--" Mason started, eyes going wide as Sebastian took his hand. As Sebastian took. Sebastian. Every inch of Mason's body was suddenly awake and Mason only had time to look from their hands to his face before he launched forward to hug him so hard they nearly knocked into the wall on the other side of the hallway. "WherethehellhaveyoubeenareyoubackforrealImissedyousomuchwhatthehell--" Sabia, properly awakened by the sudden shift in Mason's mood, emerged at the door to Mason's room. She studied the scene and gave a soft little woof, her tongue lawling out of her mouth. It served as a reminder that there were other things happening--like a sleeping roommate, for one, and and sleepng hall for another, but Mason was too happy to care. Too happy to care about that, about the fact that he hadn't even bothered to grab a shirt, too happy to care about anything other than the fact that Sebastian was there. Still, he stepped back and took Sebastian's face in both hands, studying him intently. "Where the blazes have you been, Sebastian? You look awful. " But Mason was still grinning, because Sebastian was back, Sebastian was home, Sebastian was here. Sebastian had a good explanation for everything, and Mason could finally catch a break. Sebastian arched a brow as Mason cursed-- what the fuck was that? But he seemed to truly wake up then, stumbling back as Mason lunged at him, thankfully catching him before the hit the wall. His hands met bare skin, every inch of him heating up as he took in the sight. He flushed as Mason held his face, biting his lip nervously. "It's a long story." He chuckled a bit, adding, "And gee, thanks. I've been on a plane for seven hours." Seven hours to think about how this was going to go. He'd been too nervous to portal... it wouldn't have given him time to prepare. "I've missed you so much," he whispered, pulling Mason closer to him again and wrapping him in another hug. "I'm so fucking sorry I've been gone."

Mason laughed weakly and hugged him back, burying his face against Sebastian's neck. His brain was caught in a loop: Sebastian'sbackSebastian'sbackSebastian'sbackSebastian'sback and he couldn't even begin to think about what was seven hours away that Sebastian would be coming back from. He wanted to be angry - he had been angry, and sad, and worried and lonely and just about every other emotion possible relating to a sudden disappearance of one's best friend, but the relief made them all take a back seat. Sebastian's back. "You're back," Mason mumbled, eyes still shut tight. "If this is another dream I'm going to be so mad," Mason laughed weakly and pulled back, only so he could keep looking at him, like if he took is eyes or hands off him he might disappear again. "Where were you? I thought I wasn't ever--I thought you--" Mason shook his head sharply. "I missed you so much, Seb, and now you're just--you've missed so much and--Aether on ice skates," Mason let out a wet laugh and shook his head. He released Sebastian only long enough to shut his door - with Sabia on their side, who went over and nosed at Sebastian's hand, chewing it lightly in greeting - before he held out his hand to Sebastian. "Let's go find somewhere to talk. Holy Aether, you're back. "

Sebastian laughed, shaking his head. "Babe, I promise. You're not dreaming. I'm here." He wanted to ask why and what Mason had been dreaming of if it had to do with him... but he didn't think now was the time. Mason hit him with question after question that he didn't have time to answer before the next one fired. He smiled down to Sabia and she toyed with his hand and gave her a light scratch behind the ears. He looked to Mason's hand and smiled, fitting his own into it. It felt so damn right to be back, to be close, to have Mason with him once more. He followed Mason along, not sure where they were headed, but as they wandered down the hall, he dropped Mason's hand only long enough to tug off his lacrosse sweatshirt. "Here," he said, handing it over. "You have to be freezing."

"What? Oh," Mason looked down at his bare chest and blushed brightly, all the way from his cheeks down his neck to his collarbones, all of which where very entirely visible because who cared about clothes or climate concerns when Sebastian's back? Mason took the sweatshirt and pulled it over his head; it fit and it was warm and it smelled like Sebastian and something else that Mason figured was probably plane, but Mason didn't care about that, either - it was like getting a permanent, fuzzy hug from one of his favorite people in the world. "This is mine now," Mason decided, looking back at Sebastian with a wide grin. "So I have something to remember you by next time you freaking disappear on me!" Mason punctuated the sentence with light fist taps to Sebastian's shoulder - in the second-worst case scenario in Mason's mind, Sebastian had deserved far worse. But he didn't, so Mason pulled the sleeves over his fingers before he linked arms with Sebastian. Aether and Ancients. "You're here," Mason said, smile still in place, as he led them to the floor's lounge. He pulled Sebastian to the couch and sat them down on it, then continued, "but you weren't before? You weren't just seriously avoiding me for reasons I hadn't figured out?" Unasked went the questions that had been turning over in Mason's mind: you don't hate me? We're still friends? You didn't get eaten by a manticore?

Sebastian smiled, liking the idea of Mason laying claim to his sweatshirt. "Works for me," he smiled, shrugging. He sighed softly shaking his head. "I'm not going anywhere. Not again." He flopped on the couch with Mason easily, pulling him into his side and wrapping an arm around his shoulders. He shook his head, sighing softly. "Mase, come on. You know that's not me. Why would I avoid you? I've missed you like all hell, come on." He moved his head to press a kiss to Mason's temple. "My father sort of... didn't like my visiting the compound. He thought a few weeks with family in Paris would do me well. I wasn't permitted any contact. I didn't mean to worry you, Mason."

Mason let himself be tugged; he was picking at the corners of the sweatshirt until Sabia jumped up onto the couch and laid bodily on top of him and demanded that her ears be scratched, and it was just him, and Sabia, and Sebastian. "It's harder to know what is and isn't someone when the someone isn't there," Mason murmured, accepting the templekiss but going very still as Sebastian continued to speak. "Wait. Wait, hold on." Mason sat up slightly, earning an indignant yip from Sabia (who had just gotten comfortable again, thank you) as he turned to look back at Sebastian. "You--this is because of me? Because--because you came home with me?" So it was his fault. Mason stared at him beseechingly, hoping that this was a joke somehow, but Mason could see that it was not. He had been prepared for retribution from the Fabrays, had been waiting for Quinn's wonderful little vacation to come with a higher price than it had, but this...this was Sebastian. It was so easy, sometimes, to forget that he wasn't just Seb, wasn't just Mason's best friend, that he was Sebastian Smythe, that that meant things to people. "Aethergod, I'm so--I'm so sorry. " Mason shifted to be sitting up on his own, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. It wasn't fair. Mason knew, distantly, in that objective way he looked at his own life when it was falling apart, that he should've known better -- that he should've considered the consequences. Okay, he thought to the universe, I get it. He took a breath and kept his eyes closed for another moment. Another person hurt because of Mason's whims. They'd taken Sebastian from him and he hadn't even known, nevermind known why. Sabia whined and wriggled in through the gap between his arm and his face, aggressively licking him until he had to pull back and wrap his arms around her. He still couldn't look at Sebastian, because how could he, when the evidence of time spent with his family was so visible, when two minutes ago Mason hadn't felt anything except stupid blissful joy and now that was gone because he thought he could have everything. When the hell was he going to learn that was never going to be true?

Sebastian’s eyebrows knitted together, shaking his head. "Mason..." he groaned softly as Mason pulled away, curling in on himself until Sabia nudged her way through. "Hey, no. You see him all the time. I just got back." He realized Sabia didn't understand him after he spoke, but it was too late now. "Mason Larch, don't you dare internalize the bullshit that my father pulled. It had nothing..." that wasn't true. It did have to do with Mason, but... "it was my fault, not yours. Please... babe, hey. Please." He nudged his way passed the wolf, reaching over to turn Mason's face toward him as he leaned closer. "Just stop. Mason, please. I can't... I can't deal with you blaming yourself for this because it wasn't you. Just... please."

Mason looked back at him sharply, a dozen retorts ready on his lips, but it was the 'please' that killed them, coupled with the look on his face. "Fine," Mason said, pushing him to lay back down as he had been before, so Mason could take his spot back - he rested his head on Sebastian's chest and wrapped his arm around his waist and did his very best to keep his mind present, to keep from 'blaming himself' - at least for right now, at least while Sebastian was there with him. He tightened his grip. He's mine, Mason thought, jaw tightening. You can't have him, Thomas Smythe. He allowed himself one moment of irresponsible and pointless anger, and then set it aside, along with every single other thing he hadn't been dealing all that well with. "It's nobody's fu--nobody's fault," Mason huffed finally. Sabia nestled back against him, ears flat against her head - she was privy to his mind, to his emotions; he would've pet her, reassured her, but Sebastian had been gone because of him, and Mason wasn't quite ready to make anybody else feel better yet. He stayed quiet, willing himself to listen to Sebastian's heartbeat, to take stock of the fact that whatever the reason for the absence, he was back now. "I'm sorry you got in trouble," Mason finally said, voice quiet and something more like his usual tone, if very very quiet. "Was it as awful as I'm imagining?"

Sebastian let Mason press him back down and he relaxed a bit, hand absent mindedly running through Mason's hair as he did. He could very nearly feel the possessiveness in the way he held him close. "I didn't get in trouble," he said, not even sure he believed himself. But he wasn't a child, after all. He'd like to think only children got in trouble. "Well, it was my mother's side of the family, so it wasn't completely terrible. They're all very dramatic and needy, but it's better than being stuck with the Smythes any day. They're all just thirsty to climb the ranks and obsessed with being model little Bloodlines. I think he hoped they would knock some sense into me." Sebastian pressed another kiss to Mason's forehead, sighing. "How have you been, babe?"

"Awful," Mason muttered, too tired and emotionally whiplashed to keep anything but the truth from coming out. "There's--I think I got in enough trouble for the both of us," Mason admitted with a heavy sigh, settling against him. "But...I'm glad it wasn't...I'm glad it wasn't so bad for you," Mason added, a little softer, peeking back up at him. "Did they? Knock sense into you, I mean?" Mason smiled a little, half-teasing. "Did the make you pass some Bloodline Approval test before you came home?"

Sebastian’s heart fell as Mason spoke. "What happened?" he asked, tone cautious and slow. When Mason asked if they'd managed to knock some sense into him, he snorted. "'Course not, babe. You know better than that." He looked down to Mason, giving him a little half smile. "I think the school only excused me for three weeks. I certainly didn't pass any test. I told a lot of lies, but that's about it." Sebastian kept carding his fingers gently through Mason's hair as he spoke. "But seriously, Mase, what's been going on? What do you mean that you got in trouble?"

"I did something dumb," Mason admitted with a sigh, relaxing in spite of himself at the feel of Sebastian's fingers in his hair. "Well. Madison did something dumb and I--helped." He sighed again; he didn't want to tell Sebastian, but given that the past three weeks had been overwhelmed with the burning desire just to talk to him, he didn't feel like he had much of a choice. "Madison has a Watch Eye, for the next three months," Mason explained quietly, back to fidgeting with the hem of the sweatshirt. "Because she--we--tried to..." Mason trailed off and closed his eyes. "We tried to help." Mason looked back at Sebastian. "Do you remember...um, okay, jeeze. I don't know if now's the best time, 'cause you just got back and you were on the plane for seven hours and it's like the middle of the night. What're the odds that you'll let me leave it at 'we were trying to help'?" Mason looked back at Sebastian with a winning grin.

Sebastian felt a small flare of irritation as Mason mentioned Madison having been the one to actually get them in trouble. Couldn't she have just left her brother out of it? "She..." he faltered. "Wow. That's some serious shit." He sighed softly, nodding. "Definitely understanding that you tried to help someone with something, but things like that don't usually get you Watch Eye-d. And no, the odds aren't looking good, babe." His heart fluttered as Mason gave him a beautiful aetherdamn smile, his resolve melting momentarily. "Well... wait. No. No, you need to tell me."

Mason pouted but nodded, settling back against him. He stayed quiet for a little while, chewing on the edge of his lip; when he spoke, his voice was quiet. "What do you remember about...About those students that were attacked on campus last November?"

Sebastian shrugged, stretching up the arm that wasn't currently draped around Mason to tuck it under his head. "To be honest with you, not much? I mean, I read about it... but, it stopped. So it didn't seem like something to overly concern myself with, you know?"

Mason chuckled weakly; how he wished, sometimes, that he could do that too. "Um. Well. We sort of...know the people who were attacked." Mason took a breath. "And I helped one of them, and the other approached Madison, and I couldn't let Madison do something on her own, yknow?" He sighed softly, reaching up to pet Sabia gently. "I should have just stopped her. It didn't feel right, but..." Mason sighed again.

Sebastian tilted his head, confused. "Helping a victim of an attack does not a Watch Eye earn, Mason. What aren't you telling me?" He listened as Mason elaborated a little more, but still wasn't quite sure what to make of it. "Should have stopped her? What did Madison do?"

Mason sighed, buried closer against him. "You're gonna be mad." Mason took a deep breath, and as evenly as he could, continued. "Elliott was the one who reached out to Madison. His attacker controlled him and made him attack himself, with a knife made from--ironically, from this material they invented so shedim could get the LNflu vaccine." He snorted lightly. "It can...pierce their skin. Madison somehow got it in her head to...that security wasn't doing anything, or wasn't moving fast enough. So she...we...Sort of stoletheknife." Mason cleared his throat. "And then there was this...this person who found out and wanted it back so we went to meet them with a fake, which they didn't like too much, and then there was someone else who sort of hacked our phones and cleared everything about it, except for Tina because she didn't just open the stupid text message, so it wiped her whole freaking phone right before field studies and AMATs and--" Mason was getting worked up. Sabia rumbled lowly and he took a steadying breath. Breathe. "So...next thing we know they're accusing Madison of having... Attacked Elliott to beginwith. And they wanted to talk to me because I'm her freaking accomplice." Mason sighed heavily. "So. We got in some well-deserved trouble." Sebastian stayed silent for a long while as he digested everything Mason was saying to him. "You got in trouble for stealing something that was made solely for the purpose of being able to hurt a race of people?" he asked, trying to be sure he understood. "That's completely idiotic, Mason. No one should have a weapon like that to begin with." He didn't exactly like that Elliott had approached Madison after being attacked because, of course, she would try to help him without regards to her own safety and well being. "The two of you probably should have come up with a better plan that trying to steal it, but... I understand why you did it." He abhorred the idea of he and Madison meeting up with someone about this knife-- it sounded ridiculously dangerous-- but it didn't seem like now was the time to chastise them. "I'm glad you're safe," he said firmly.

Mason relaxed, at least a little, because some anxious part of him was able to still slightly. Sebastian wasn't mad at him. He was worried - he could tell that from the way his grip tightened - but he wasn't mad. "We shouldn't have come up with any plan at all." Mason said with a shake of his head. "Or if we did, it should have included Security." Mason snorted softly. "It was completely idiotic. Because we're complete idiots."

"I..." Sebastian hesitated, trying to figure out what he was trying to say. "I... I don't think the two of you were idiotic. I mean... it wasn't the best plan. It's idiotic that you're getting the Eye for trying to save people. Makes no aetherdamn sense to me, but what do I know?" he sighed, biting his lip. "I agree. Security would have been a better route. Probably a lot of things that could have been a better route... but what's done is done. We'll get through it."

"We?" Mason echoed, looking up at him for the first time since he began to talk about the whole thing. Mason was suddenly, sharply overwhelmed by appreciation and love; Quinn had wanted to help but couldn't, not really, and Marley was dealing with Samhain (which, Mason realized, he would need to tell Sebastian about) and Madison was in the same situation he was, maybe even worse. Mason buried his face against Sebastian's chest again, the word keeping time with the thrum of his heart: we, we, we. It felt so nice to be a we again. "I missed you so much, Seb."

"We," Sebastian repeated, not sure how to react to the tone of Mason's voice. He wondered what else was going on inside his head but didn't want to push, was almost scared to ask. How had he left Mason alone to deal with all of this shit? He should have been here for him. One thing that he knew for sure was the he was never going to allow himself to be carted off again. He'd rather deal with the familial fallout than be away from Mason and his friends. "I missed you too," he said softly, adding, "It's been so hard being away form you, Mase. It was like fucking torture."

Mason nodded against him. A keen awareness was pressing against him - he'd been lonely. Not alone, and he hadn't even had time to wallow, but aether it felt so good to have Sebastian back. We. "We have so many movies to watch," Mason mumbled against his chest. "I went to your room every Monday but you weren't there and my texts weren't going through. I thought maybe you were finally sick of Commons movies." Or of me, he didn't add aloud. "I tried to read more of Harry Potter but it wasn't the same." It had just made him sadder.

Sebastian nodded, nuzzling the top of Mason's head. "We do. Mondays... Mondays have hurt." He could hear the stress in his voice, knew he wasn't going to be able to pretend that he was fine. Shaking his head, he murmured a soft never. He'd never tire of movies with Mason. "You're my favorite part of the week, Mase." Perhaps it was true that absence makes the heart grow fonder, because being away had made him desperate to be even closer. "I'll read more to you. We can do homework together? Watch a few movies on not-Mondays?" Sebastian sighed, feeling a thickness in his throat. He was almost nervous to be away from Mason again, for some reason. It had been so long and it hardly felt real to be home. "I'm not quite ready to have any sort of distance between us again. I know that's unrealistic, but I've missed you so fucking much. Everything has been terrible. Why don't you guys just come back to my room and we can get some sleep?"

Mason nodded easily. He had so much to tell Sebastian, so much to be told - aether, they were best friends, and now seeing him only once a week for sure seemed absurd. "Okay," Mason agreed. Inwardly, he was worried about it - he hadn't slept well since he'd come back from The Compound, and he didn't want to disturb clearly-exhausted Sebastian, but...but the three weeks had felt like three years or thirty, and he couldn't imagine just going back to bed. On top of him, Sabia made a low noise of disapproval: Classes, pup, and your things? Mason wrinkled his nose at her. "I have class at nine tomorrow. Don't let me miss it, 'kay?" Mason looked back at Sebastian and smiled again, wider and surer. "Everything has been terrible but you're back now and that's one not so terrible thing." Mason patted his chest gently and then sat up, yawning as he did a great stretch. "Sleep now. We'll worry about everything tomorrow, right?"

Sebastian smiled a bit and nodded. As Mason grinned, Sebastian brushed a hand over his cheek. "Of course, babe. Won't let you miss anything." He sat up as Mason did, watching as he stretched with a dazed smile. It was so good to be back. "Yes. We'll start to figure things out. We'll make a plan. It will be okay." Sebastian stood up and offered Mason a hand. "We should grab clothes for you, unless you just want to borrow some stuff to wear tomorrow."

"Who needs clothes, " Mason whined, but Sabia woofed at him sharply to remind him: he did. He needed clothes. "Guess I should probably let Spence know I wasn't kidnapped, too," Mason agreed, linking his arm with Sebastian's as they moved to the door. Aether, finally; it was like something had been missing, like he'd been going around with only half his vocabulary or only part of his body. Sebastian was something key, something important, and as he reemerged from his room, messenger bag packed with clothes and a toothbrush, note left for Spencer, he found himself cautiously optimistic. Maybe he was right this time and everything really would be fine. Mason locked his door and joined him again, linking their arms once more - after a second of hesitation, he leaned up and pecked Sebastian's cheek. "Welcome home, Seb."

Sebastian narrowed his eyes to Sabia when she barked to Mason, seeming to chastise him for his comment about clothes. He certainly didn't need them, but it didn't seem that the wolf agreed. He waited patiently in the hallway, looking down to her as Mason gathered his things. "You're not a very good wingwoman, you know. Not that you'd be mine, but rather his. And it would be nice if you didn't woof at him so--" the pointless conversation was cut off by Mason coming back out into the hall. Sebastian smiled as he took his arm, heart hammering in his ears as he flushed when Mason kissed his cheek. "Thanks, Mase," he smiled. "C'mon. Let's get back to my room. Talk some more? Try to get some sleep?"

"Sleep sounds good," Mason admitted, linking his free arm with Sebastian's again. He was still wearing the lacrosse sweatshirt, but now he had a tank top beneath it, and socks on his feet beneath his shoes. "Talking..." seemed dangerous. "Maybe we can hold off on the heavy stuff till morning?" Maybe they could hold off on it forever? "Also, Sabia says if she was meant to be a wingwoman, she would have wings." Mason tilted his head, an amused, curious smile on his face. "What were you two talking about?"

"'Course we can, babe," Sebastian said, giving Mason's arm a gentle squeeze. He smiled a bit, looking toward Mason. He looked really damn good in his sweatshirt. It was almost... domestic. And made his heart beat a little faster. Narrowing his eyes as Mason mentioned his conversation with Sabia, Sebastian huffed softly and stared at her. Traitor. "A flying wolf would be quite interesting. But no. And nothing. We weren't talking about anything. You look pretty tired," he added, hoping for a subject change. Mason didn't need to know-- wouldn't want to know his flirty thoughts.

Sabia yipped at Sebastian lightly, something that made Mason laugh. Aether. "Whatever you say." Mason yawned and shook his head. "I was in a dead sleep 'fore you showed up. I'm allowed to look tired." He'd probably looked tired before that, too. "You don't look too hot yourself,"

"What was that?" Sebastian asked hurriedly, wanting to know what the noise had been conveying. Was she telling Mason even more things he didn't need to know? He bit his lip, glancing over. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry, Mase. I should have let you sleep until morning. I could have waited. I just... I guess my heart ran away with me." Sebastian shrugged a bit and sighed. "Well, it's been a rough few days. I've missed so many fucking things. I missed a job interview, Quinn's birthday, classes, you..." he held the door open as they walked outside, making their way to Notos. "I just didn't want to have to miss you any longer, I guess."

Mason smiled to himself, bumping hips with him gently. "No, that's not what I meant. I'm--I'd definitely rather be awake and see you than sleep and not," Mason promised with a wide smile. He snugged closer in the cool of the night and yawned again. "Quinn will just be happy to see you, I bet. Not as happy as me," he added with a smile. "What job interview? Can you make it up?"

Sebastian chewed at the inside of his cheek. "Well, I just... sleep is important." He kissed Mason's temple as he leaned in closer. "I wasn't trying to interrupt said sleep, but like, impatience?" Chuckling he glanced up at Notos as they approached. He hadn't even went up to his room, instead leaving his suitcase at the front desk and running off to Mason's. He missed his bed. He missed his room and his brews and not being watched 24/7. "I'm probably going to have to take something to get some sleep. A lot on my mind." Sebastian ran his free hand through his hair. "I know I've said it a million times, but I fucking missed you so much," he murmured softly.

"Make it a double?" Mason said, peering up at him. "You don't have to miss me anymore. 'Cause you're here," Mason beamed up at him, sleepy but happy; he only released him so Sebastian could pick up his suitcase, and then he wrapped his arm around Sebastian's waist again. "I'm really glad you're home."

"'Course, babe," Sebastian murmured with a yawn, nodding. He snatched his suitcase and smiled when Mason moved back to his side nearly instantly. "You say that, you know? But for some reason it still doesn't quite feel real." Smiling, he said, "I'm glad too, Mase. Thanks for not being salty about how long I've been gone." He tugged Mason into his arms when they were in the elevator, completely uncaring of how... snuggly it was. He needed to feel grounded. "I should probably try and shower and get all the plane off of me, but fuck I'm tired." He pulled back as the elevator door opened at his floor and headed to his room.

"You do kinda stink," Mason teased, wrinkling his nose lightly, playfully. "How 'bout you start the potions and shower quick and then we can go right to bed?" Mason felt some of the tension ease out of him as the returned to his room - he didn't know how many times this past month he'd stood on the other side, hoping that this time Sebastian would answer. "Imma be salty though. When I'm more awake. Except not as much as I could've 'cause it was my fault." Mason moved over to Sebastian's bed and flopped across the bed, burying his face in the pillows. Aether, Sebastian had a nice bed. Sabia leaped up next to him and settled down, nosing at his cheek affectionately. She liked it here, too.

Sebastian groaned loudly as he unlocked the door, making a big show of rolling his eyes. "It was not your fucking fault, Mason Larch. You were an excuse for my father to be an asshole. Do not internalize his bullshit. That's my job." He watched as Mason made himself at home on his bed. He took the suggestion with ease, liking that Mason had come up with such an easy solution. He took a deep breath as he walked into his potions closet, having missed his own space terribly. He grabbed a cauldron and started tossing ingredients in, moving it to a hot plate to start a simmer. "Gonna hop in the shower, babe." Sebastian made quick work of hopping in the shower, not realizing until after he got out that he hadn't grabbed pajamas. "Mase?" he called out. "Can you toss in some shorts and stuff?" Sebastian highly doubted Mason would appreciate him bopping around in a towel. "Or close your eyes so I can grab shit myself?"

Mason was asleep, snoring gently. Sabia, however, was not. She slid off the bed and grabbed a mouthful of laundry from the corner - ew, ew, ew - and scratched at the bathroom door. She didn't know or care what shorts were, or if she had any in her mouth.

Sebastian was incredibly confused when he heard a strange scratching noise at the door. Keeping the towel firmly around his waist, he opened it up, peeking out. He tilted his head curiously, gaze moving downward until he was met with Sabia. Arching a brow, he took the clothes from her mouth-- yoga pants were close enough-- and thanked her softly. "He fall asleep on me?" Smirking a bit, he thanked her softly and stepped out of Sabia's line of sight to slip them on. "Should I wake him to give him that brew?" he asked after he slipped them on. "Or let him sleep?" He toweled his hair dry, tossing it and heading back out toward the bed.

Sabia hopped back up on the bed, nosing at Mason, nipping at his ear until he stirred. "Hrn?" Mason frowned in confusion, one hand automatically petting Sabia's fur. "Where...oh. Seb," Mason smiled sleepily and tugged Sabia down to him, ignoring her huff of dissatisfaction. "Hi. Time is it?"

Sebastian smiled a bit as he watched Sabia and Mason, nose wrinkling as she woke him. There was his answer. Sebastian grabbed a glass and doled out some of the brew, walking it over to the bed. "It's late, babe. 2:30. Drink this," he added, pressing the glass into Mason's hand.

"I don't need a--" Sabia interrupted Mason with a low growl. "Okay, okay. Thank you," Mason added, knocking it back in one gulp. "C'mon. Sleep time." Mason squinted up at him. "Your hair's all..." Mason reached a hand up toward his head.

Sebastian arched a brow as Sabia growled at Mason's protest, incredibly curious as to what was going on. He drank some of the brew himself and moved to slide in bed next to Mason. "Yeah. The hair's making choices." Smiling, he snuggled down into the sheets, the cool fabric against his bear chest having him humming contentedly. He'd missed his fucking bed. "Ugh, the fucking light," he groaned.

Mason chuckled softly into the pillow, patting his still-damp hair gently. "The hair's making good choices." Mason yawned and turned slightly, taking in the problem Sebastian pointed out. "The light," Mason agreed. He could've cast something to put it out, but he had to brush his teeth anyway, and the potion was already working through him. He couldn't magic. So he slid out of bed and grabbed his toothbrush and paste and hit the light. He disappeared into the bathroom for a moment and then he leaned back in the doorway and watched Sebastian. This was good. This is exactly how it was supposed to be. Sebastian was back. He finished brushing his teeth, kicked his socks off and returned to the bed, nestling beneath the covers. "Hi," he said, barely more than a whisper. "You're home."

Sebastian huffed, unhappy when Mason squirmed away, but knew he had to go get ready for bed. Their eyes remained locked together in a silence he didn't really understand as Mason brushed his teeth. It felt right. Then again, being with Mason truly always had. He could have stayed there, content, for hours. But soon Mason was back and wonderfully close. "Hi," he replied softly, a small smile teasing the corners of his lips in the dark. "I'm home. I'm not leaving again. Not without you." The words tumbled from his lips so easily, no thought put behind them other than raw honesty. "I mean, if I ever have to leave again, I'll tell you. Or won't go. Or would try and take you."

Mason shook his head, shifting to let Sabia have some room to curl up between them. "Can't take you," Mason mumbled, patting Sebastian's face gently. "You're here now. No going anywhere else." Mason closed his eyes and snuggled closer, letting out a soft sigh. "Not 'llowed, 'kay?"

Sebastian hummed contentedly as he felt the brew slowly overtaking him, like being wrapped up in a large, warm blanket. He smiled pleasantly at the idea of Mason not allowing him to go places. "Mmk, boss. No leaving." He yawned, burying a hand in Sabia's fur as she nuzzled between them. He loved having the two of them around.

"Gnight, Seb," Mason mumbled, letting out a contented sigh. Everything was okay. Everything was fine. Sebastian was back. All the other crap - Coleman, Samhain - was nothing but a hazy distant blur. Before he could say or think about anything else, he was asleep again, more relaxed than he'd been in months.

"Night, Mase," Sebastian said sleepily, reaching out to find a connection with some part of Mason. His hand hit something, an arm, maybe? But it was enough. Just to remember that he was here and everything would be fine. He'd start piecing everything together tomorrow. They'd figure it out. It would all be okay.

#para: all #para: 078 #para: came back to me #para: sebastian

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remsyk-blog · 5 years

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Daily Prompt - 2

Oh hey, two days in a row. I’m on a roll, lawl.

I’m debating about whether this one should be a two parter or if I should just leave it as is. I didn’t quite complete the prompt, but I kind of like how this turned out regardless.

Maybe I’ll come back to it.

Again, just spit this out, no editing.

I'll admit it: I stared. I may have even laughed, as much as a person can while staring down Death.

"Reaper, actually."

I may have stared harder, blinked a moment. "What?"

"I'm not Death. I'm the Reaper."

If you're confused, just think of how I felt. I had just sat down for another evening of Netflix and whatever I could dig up from the kitchen (preferably quick and easy, minimal effort required). I wasn't in the mood for anything in particular. Just the other night, I went from a stand up special to a Gothic stop motion movie to a cartoonimation (anime thing, who knows) about vampires. I won't say I'm a terribly interesting person, but some days a simple binge watch doesn't cut it.

I had just decided to try to whittle down my backlog of Marvel shows when someone knocked on my door. In case you haven't figured it out by now, I'm a bit of a hermit, and I like my privacy and own space. I considered simply ignoring the summons. If it was someone looking to spread the word or anyone else with information pamphlets in need of recycling, they could just slip it under the door like any other millennial my age would expect. If it was someone I knew, they could text me.

But the knocking continued.

At this point in time, the logical answer was to continue to ignore them. Maybe they'd think I'm not home. Once again, if it was someone just looking for attention, they wouldn't know which car in the parking lot was mine, unless they had been waiting for me, which is a whole nother line of mental spiraling I didn't need at the moment, so I nipped that in the bud.

But still the knocking continued.

Now, another thought came to the forefront, not that the annoying was pissing me off (which it was), but that now it would be annoying my neighbor, potentially sparking an interaction I had zero interest in initiating or mitigating. With energy I had reserved for grade A lounging, I got up to answer the door.

And almost slammed shut.

Standing at my door was Death himself, or someone with some serious cosplay skills.

"Reaper, actually."

Which brings my to my current dilemma.

"What?" He -it? She?- didn't sound like I expected, but to be honest, what would Death, sorry, the Reaper, sound like? For some reason, I thought his (for the sake of consistency and my sanity, he) voice would be deep, otherworldly, maybe make the walls shake or send fear running down my spine. Instead, he sounded... normal.

"I'm not Death. I'm the Reaper."

He recited the words automatically, like reading from a script, and I had just given him his cue. I'm sure he got that reaction a lot.

"Okay..." I said slowly. I glanced around him, half expecting hidden cameras or for someone to jump out from a doorway into the hall, laughing as they snapped a picture of my face.

"May I come in?"

"Are you a vampire?"

I couldn't see his face, despite looking right up into his hood, but I could have sworn I had shocked him either stupid or speechless.

"I just told you I'm the Reaper."

"Yeah, but why do you need permission to come inside? Can't you just go wherever?" I'm no expert, but I'd watched enough episodes of Supernatural to know the basics. And yes, I am well aware of that show running fast and very loose with the source material, so sue me.

"Because it's polite to ask."

Now it was my turn to be surprised, and a feel like an asshole.

"Sure, come on." I pulled the door open as I stepped aside. Once he passed, I took a moment to do one last sweep for cameras before closing the door. "Sit wherever you want. Sorry about the mess."

The Reaper sat on the couch beside the pillow I had propped on the armrest and I opted to perch on the edge of my favorite Ikea chair, feeling the beginning of nerves tightening in my chest. I watched him a moment, waiting for him to say anything. As the silence stretched, my nerves grew, and with it my resentment. How dare this cosplayer come into my home and make me feel like an outsider!

With a huff, I settled back into my chair and curled my legs under me. "So, what's up?"

"I apologize for the abruptness of this visit, but I am here to fetch you."

"Fetch me."

Oddly enough, the Reaper seemed nervous, an oddly dissonant emotion to see on such an imposing figure.

"There was a... mix up, if you will," he began as he wrung his hands, his black gloves blending perfectly with his bleak attire. "Normally, we do things in a different order, but some papers were filed incorrectly, some messages crossed, miscommunication on our part."

I waved at him dismissively. "Don't worry, I was an administrative assistant for a little bit. I get it."

My assurances didn't seem to affect him, but it was hard to tell.

"I simply want you to know, this is not normal protocol. Had we done this properly, you would better prepared for the journey."

If I was nervous before, I was almost panicky now. "Wait, journey? Journey where? I can't just drop everything and go globe trotting! I'm saving my vacation days for the end of the year and I don't have much sick leave left either, assuming they'd even approve it on such short notice. And will I need my passport, cause I keep meaning to get it renewed but, you know."

I liked my job. In fact, I really loved my job, and my manager was a relatively laid back guy. I had enough of a rapport with him that I could probably get away with putting in leave on short notice, but not for long periods of time. The last thing I needed was to end up on his shit list.

"You won't need to worry about that."

"Too late, asshat. I'm already worrying!" I snapped as I surged out of my chair, nearly falling on my face as my foot caught on the armrest. "You honestly expect me to drop everything and just go on a freaken journey with you? This ain't Middle Earth, Sauron, and I'm no hobbit."

"I knew this would happen," he mumbled to himself, his head drooping as his shoulders sagged. "I told them this would happen."

I narrowed my eyes at him. I could feel my shoulders starting to ache from the tension singing through my limbs, but I wasn't going to let up in my own home. After a moment, he looked up again.

"I am very sorry, but it has to be this way. Most people have more time to prepare. I don't mean to upset you."

"Maybe if you actually explained what you're talking about, I wouldn't be confused and upset." I'd like to say I arched my eyebrow at him, but I never learned to do that properly.

"Of course!" He actually bounced to the edge of my couch, a sight I don't think I'll ever forget. "First of all, I apologize if I'm not clear; this is normally something that is rather self explanatory when we follow the system, so I rarely have to break it down to my charges."

"Charges?" I asked flatly.

"In the most simple terms possible, my job is to escort you on your journey from here to eternity, the great beyond, or afterlife, depending on your preference. It's all the same."

My face could have been a reaction gif. "I'm sorry what?"

"My job is to escort you on your journey to the afterlife."

He said it so earnestly, he reminded me of a puppy waiting for approval for finally sitting when told, if said puppy was covered from head to toe in black robes. Of course, in the wake of this revelation, one question insisted on being answered first.

"Wait, who was supposed to be here?"

"Death."

Prompt: The Reaper does not bring death, he follows it. The Reaper is not an omen of doom, he is a guardian, sent to protect your soul on its way from this world to the next. The things that wait between the two are...unpleasant.

#my writing #daily prompts #writing #12/13/18 #december

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ideocosmonaut · 6 years

Text

surveyzzz

When was the last time you went in the car past midnight? Gosh it had to have been sometime early this year driving home from an after party So, you have brown eyes? Nope What was the last thing you ate? Chocolate pretzels Can you say you’re happy? No but I manage

What’s bothering you right now? Mostly anxiety and loneliness

Who was the last person to text you? A friend What are you drinking right now? Nothing What all did you do today? I got groceries and went to a little thing called Weekend of the Witches. And I worked on some art. Why did you last laugh really hard? I dont remember How is your hair? Freshly cut Could things possibly get any better? I hope so How are you feeling at the moment? A bit tired Do you have feelings for someone? Yes What was for dinner tonight? Chips and onion dip lol Would you be able to name everyone you kissed? Yeah that’s easy Are you in a good mood? Im okay Where is the last person you kissed? Im not sure What color shirt are you wearing? N/a Do you think you could ever make it as a rap singer? Nope How important are looks to you? Important if I’m actively looking for someone. It’s what causes me to interact. But if I get to know someone first, say through work or friends, and then fall for them, then it doesnt matter what they look like. Did you have a fling this summer but it didn’t really go anywhere? Nope Do you get jealous? A bit Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? I kissed my mom on the forehead when she died, if that counts. What is something you currently want? Love and warmth. Security. Affection. What was the last thing you bought? Groceries What was the weather like today? Rainy Do you like sushi? Love it Is your hair longer than your shoulders? No Ever kissed anyone with a nipple piercing? No What about a lip piercing? No Nose piercing? No Do you like your hair? It’s alright Have you ever kissed someone who had a boyfriend/girlfriend? No Did you like kissing the last person you kissed or the one before that more? I dunno man Ever made out in a pool? No The shirt you’re wearing, does anyone else have it? N/a What was the last movie you watched? Scott Pilgrim vs The World

What do you usually get on a sub? Whatever comes on a cuban, I’m not sure. Some kind of meat, cheese, pickles, mayo and mustard.

Do your lips taste like anything right now? Maybe onions...

Are you an annoyed big sibling or annoying little sibling? (Or neither…) A distant big sibling

Do you have a pair of those ‘nerd’ glasses? Yes

Have you ever watched the Glee Project? No

When does school start for you? Never

Who is always there for you? My friends usually

What ticks you off? Bullying and blaming without evidence

Where is the last place you were other then where you are right now? A place called Southern Trash

Why do you act the way you do? Cuz they dont think it be like it is, but it do

How do you feel about the last person you kissed? Well I love my mom

When are you the happiest? While traveling and experiencing cities and countries for the first time

Who do you get along with the best? My friends

What color is your remote control for the main TV you watch? Black

Where is your heart currently at? My left side

Why do you usually laugh — something funny happened or someone got hurt? Something funny happened wtf

How are you feeling today? Meh

When is your birthday? Sept 17

What do you spend most of your money on: Food, clothes, etc. ? Aside from bills, food

Is there anything around your neck right now? Nope

Do you ever feel like you’re alone in this world? Kind of in a way

Don’t you just adore Simple Plan? No

Lol, Lawl, Rotfl, Lmao, or Lmfao? (Which you use most) Lol

Do you ever watch info-mercials for fun? Sometimes

Where do you usually shop at? Publix

When do/did you turn 21? 2006

Are friendship bracelets cool? (Even if they’re not for a friendship) Maybe. Nostalgia is big

Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Yeah

Do you really care about namebrands? Unfortunately. I have to avoid a lot of big names in favor of other specific names because of my size

Describe your favorite pair of jeans to me please. Tapered

Do you think it means more if someone takes the time to type: I love you; rather then ILY? Sure

To wash in the shower, do you use a loofa? No

What brand is your shampoo? I forget. It’s some tea tree shit

Have you ever ridden on a horse? Yes

How many questions make a survey too long? Like 1000

Do you know what ‘savvy’ means? Kind of

Ever get a craving for a salad? I do. Sometimes

Who’s your favorite celebrity? Bill Murray probably

Which is better: Facebook, Twitter, tumblr, Myspace or Skype? They’re all terrible wastes of time imo. But I enjoy making my friends laugh with memes on FB

Does it bug you when people do things to try and bug you?

Yes

Do you like going to Borders?

What?

Is your local Borders shutting down? Mine is. Huh?

Little dogs: Cute or annoying? Depends

Is there a dream catcher in your room? No

Do storms scare or fascinate you? I like them

Are you polite? Usually, unless someone isnt

Ever been so tired a part of your body hurt? Yes

Did you ever pretend you were someone else as a favor for a friend? Not as a favor... Do you think men prefer curvy women or skinny women? I think they like a lot of different things Do you own a water gun? Somewhere What item most embarrasses you to purchase? Junk food

Do you know any actual dances or do you just move to the music? I just move baby

Do you eat pork and beans? I have What is the last thing you referred to as legit? Who knows Do you give cards to people for holidays or events? No I dont understand why thats a thing

Do you have anything hanging from the ceiling of your room? Nope Name the coolest thing about one of your grandparents. My dad’s dad lost a finger in the Navy. My mom’s dad was in Knights of Columbus and left me his sword. Which do you prefer, doctor or dentist? I’ve met nicer dentists, oddly Are any walls of your room blank? Yes What color are your favorite shoes? Black If someone was willing to tell the person you like that you liked them, would you let them? I already have Do you know the zodiac signs of your friends? Not since they added the new one Do you drink any hot beverages? What? Tea sometimes Name two things you put whipped cream on? Frappes and Strawberry shortcake Who is the last person who saw you with bare feet? My friends Do you ever eat peanut butter straight from the jar? If its mine Do you know how to ride a bike? Do you own one? Yes and no What was the last pill you took for? Pain Any friends you only know online? Kind of Do you ever talk to your next door neighbor? Nope

Did anything shock you today? Like all the shelves in Publix. Zapped me a bunch of times. Are you wearing a hoodie right now? No Do you prefer your clothes loose or close fitting? I like loose but it doesnt look good on me Are your favorite pants jeans? Pants are the devil Favorite thing you’ve ever painted? I dont really paint. Id like to Are there any songs that remind you of your mother? Yes If you had a sister, would you prefer her older or younger? Why? I do What is something you wanted to say today, but didn’t? Nothing I guess

What’s the last thing you panicked about? Im not sure. I think nicotine used to raise my blood pressure sky high and cause me to have a panic attack so I had to quit smoking. What do you have planned out as a career? Nothing. I only plan to die so far Are you planning any special outings with family or friends? Kind of

Which word(s) do you generally use to describe someone attractive? (e.g. “fit”, “sexy” etc.) Gorgeous

What was the last alcoholic drink you tried for the first time? Did you like it? Sam Adams Oktoberfest. It’s alright Who is that last person who harassed and annoyed you? Some internet pleb Who is the last person who made you feel hurt? Some friends... What was the last thing you were worried about? Dying alone probably. It’s always there What time of day feels the most magical to you? 3 am What is the last physical ailment you took medication for? Headache Do you get motion sickness? I used to Who is the cutest baby you know? Dante. RIP Have you ever thrown a rock at a window? Probably Has anyone ever thrown a rock at your window? Maybe Does your hair react well to dye, or does it damage it? I dunno What kind of pet do you wish you had? A living plushie that doesnt need to eat or pee. And also doesnt feel the need to murder... When was the last time you had an argument with one of your parents? Years ago Do you still live at home or with a guardian of some sort? If so, when do you plan on moving out, if ever? If you have moved out, how did your relationship to your parents change after that? No, I saw them a lot less but I still love them

When was the last time you were diagnosed with something? Are you concerned about anything regarding your physical or mental health at the moment? Years ago. Yeah but I’m an idiot and a hypochondriac What’s the longest you’ve gone without talking to other people? How did this affect you? Couple days. Happens sometimes on weekends What is one blanket judgment you tend to make about people (like, you judge all people who live at home, all people who drink, etc)? Does this judgment come from a particular personal experience? I try not to judge anyone really. I do playfully but not realistically. Everyone has their reasons, whether they be right or wrong and usually people just judge them instead of trying to learn about why they are that way and maybe help them. Like prisoners. People are people. Most are misunderstood or ignorant. What is something seemingly small and inconsequential that will cause you to avoid a person? If I do something to upset them

How do you react to other people yelling or slamming doors? Is this something you ever do too? It happened a lot in my childhood. I’d rather just not get angry but it happens. One second of anger usually costs me a weeks worth of apologies. It’s a tad expensive. Who in your life do you get along with best? How about the least? How often do you have to interact with these people? My best friend. My boss. Usually a lot Have you ever lost your cool at work or somewhere else important? What happened as a result? Yeah. Got reprimanded. Shock and awe. Was a long, long time ago.

When was the last time you did something you knew was wrong? What about the last time you did something right just because it was right? Morally? Or just like running a red light? I do little things all the time. I’m not perfect. Morally, umm hmm... I’m not sure. Probably not since I was a teenager. I hold doors for people all the time. I donate sometimes. I tend to stay in the middle mostly. Zen. Ying and yang.

When you do good things, do you do them because you want some sort of reward or recognition or do you do them just for the sake of being good? I just enjoy being nice. I do all the little things I can think of. When you fill out social media bios and such, how do you typically describe yourself? Is describing yourself something you have a difficult time doing? Yeah actually. I usually just end up deflecting with dumb comedic phrases What is one unusual belief you have? Has anyone ever made fun of you for your beliefs? I dont have any unusual beliefs. Ive always said I’d take up scientology for the perks though lol Have you taken anyone’s virginity? No Who has the power to break you? Feels like everyone but I know its just me How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? A few What’s one thing about you people wouldn’t expect? Idk. I’m kind of a robosexual Have you ever been in therapy? Are you now? Do you think you always will be, or do you think there will come a time when you don’t need it anymore? No but I should be What is the most dangerous thing you do on a regular basis? Probably eat junk food. I used to self-harm but it wasnt really dangerous. I suppose my thoughts can be considered dangerous then Have you ever been in a hospital and not felt safe? No

Is anyone in your family blind? No What’s your favorite gaming system? PC

Is your more photogenic side your left or right? Idk they’re both kinda fug Do you believe in evolution? Yes What job do you think people should be paid the most for? Any job that puts you directly into harms way, followed by jobs that involve removing people from harms way. Have you ever seen a tornado in real life? From a distance What was your favorite stuffed animal as a kid? What was it named? A T-Rex my dad got me from a business trip. He didnt have a name Were you ever held back a year in school? Did you ever skip a grade? Nope Have you ever been given a hickey? Have you given one? No Who was the last person to kiss your cheek? My aunt I guess Where’s the farthest you’ve been from home? Maine

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