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riding-the-sunset-bird · 3 months

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A character reference based on all four Steps of Our Life! It's only "sort of" a height reference as well since obviously they're not 100% accurate (the devs don't have specific heights for everyone to my knowledge).

I did dig into the code to try and get characters at their "normal" heights but there are other matters at play too (example: Nicolas is obviously "taller" than he should be because he needs to be pushed upwards to be visible enough above the game's text box; likewise with other very short characters).

Still, this should serve as either a nice reference guide for every character or a "height reference" in the sense of getting an idea of which characters are shorter/taller than others.

I'm also going to detail some extra notes below the break, including posts from GB Patch's Tumblr that reference any defined heights (with Cove being the obvious one) or general height things, as well as some more stuff about the MC's height in comparison to the three love interests depending on what you pick.

Cove's height is listed on GB Patch's FAQ as 4' 1" in Step 1 (also stated as "mostly average, perhaps a bit on the short side"), 5' 4" in Step 2 (in-game this is defined as "very tall" on the MC's potential height spectrum, as that is the only option considered on par with Cove's height), 6' 0" in Step 3, and 6' 4" in Step 4. A fun fact is that Cove's final height was originally 6' 3" (191cm) instead.

Derek in Step 2 is under five feet tall (this post also lists Cove as "around 5 and a half feet tall" which you could take as either close enough to 5' 4" as stated above or a potential original height he had that got changed). In-game, he's "short" but not "very short", as having your MC be "very short" will prompt narration telling you that you're shorter than Derek, whereas "short" only has you relate to him in smolness generally.

Step 4 Derek is "mostly average." He wouldn't be considered tall nor would he be considered short. His youngest brother Nicolas will "probably end up as a similar height to him" once he's more grown up.

Step 4 Baxter is "taller than average, but not especially tall."

I've been informed that, on the Our Life Patreon Discord, Step 4 Derek's height is listed as 5' 9" (175cm) whereas Step 4 Baxter's is listed as 5' 11" (180cm), so those are their defined heights. Before that, both of their heights had jumped around somewhat. A post from 2019 said that Derek was 5' 11", but a post from June 2021 said that Baxter was 5' 11" and Derek was 5' 9" (so consistent with the Discord). Then there's also another post from July 2021 (you'll have to scroll down for this one) that listed Baxter at around 5' 10" while Derek was 5' 8"/5' 9". If you're insane enough to try and use the character reference too, then Baxter would actually be around 6'1" at minimum since he's taller than Step 3 Cove (though you could also make the same argument that this means the mom trio of Pamela, Noelani, and Kyra must be decently tall as well since they're so close to Cove on the character reference).

I don't have any experience with GB Patch's other game, XOXO Droplets, so I don't know what ages the characters are in it, but since both Shiloh and Jeremy are characters seen visibly in Our Life, I thought I'd also mention that they're listed as 5' 10" and 5' 5" (or 5' 5 1/2") respectively in XOXO Droplets. Jeremy also apparently grows to 5' 8" in his 20s and he's 22 in the Our Life Cove Wedding DLC (I don't think this is spoken of in the game specifically but he's labeled as 22 in the code).

As for the MC and how their height plays into things, "tall" and "very tall" as well as "short" and "very short" tend to be considered the same for the most part in the game's code. It's not that there isn't a difference at all (I would say it's still notable), it's just that sometimes the game may be more vague about height differences. My post about Errands references this where you don't need more athletic points due to being "very short" instead of "short" to give Cove a piggyback ride.

A guesstimate I'd make is that about 5% of the time, the game will take note of whether you're "very tall" instead of "tall" or "very short" instead of "short." Otherwise, you're either "generally tall," "average," or "generally short." There are also other instances (usually with Cove) where the game might just check if you're either generally tall (around Cove's height) or not generally tall (i.e: definitely shorter than him).

This is actually relevant to the heights because, following all above information, one would assume that Step 4 Derek is average, Step 4 Baxter is tall, and Step 4 Cove is very tall going off the MC's potential "height spectrum" of very short, short, average, tall, and very tall, but it's not entirely the case.

A "tall" MC (generally tall) will look "down" at Step 4 Baxter just as he will look "up" at them or they'll look directly at each other if the MC is "average," same as Step 3 Baxter, but--

when the game has any instance of differentiating between "tall" and "very tall" (they never do this for Step 3 Baxter so the base assumption would have to be that he's just average height), things change.

During Baxter's apology in the wedding of his Step 4, Baxter dips his chin to look at the MC if they're "short"/"very short," levels his chin to look at the MC if they're "average"/"tall," and then lifts his chin to look at the MC if they're "very tall." A generally tall MC still has to lean down to kiss him if they choose to do so though.

Also, during the intimacy scene with Baxter (either in his office or his living room), if the MC is "very short," "short," or "average," it states that Baxter is taller than them. If they're "very tall," then Baxter is shorter than them, but a "tall" MC is "almost the exact same height" as him.

This is all a really long-winded way of saying that GB Patch referring to Step 4 Baxter being "taller than average but not especially tall" might mean that he's some infuriating middle ground between average and tall where he's not quite one but not quite the other either (which honestly is very Baxter of him so I can't even be mad).

#type: helpful #type: cracking the cove #our life #olba #our life: beginnings & always #((If you line up the images yourself then make sure the height of the original images are all the same))#((I don't know if Tumblr squished any.))#((Let me know if I'm missing anyone!))#((I know there's Step 3 Jeremy and someone named Cala in Derek's Step 4 (haven't gotten there yet)))#((but you only see those two on the phone so there is no ''default'' position/size for them.))#((Also I was worried that Tumblr would eat the quality if I uploaded such long images))#((so I separated Steps 2 and 3 and 4 into multiple images.))#((Hopefully that's fine; if you line them up side-by-side it still works out.))#((Me feeling so exposed because now how I design my Coves is here for everyone to see.))#((Feel free to judge my bias towards the color blue.))

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moonymauk · 3 months

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hi @hotvintagepoll I've made a letterboxd list with all the actors from this tournament if anyone would like an easy enough way to see all the guys and the movies they've been in <3

#sorry I'm addicted to procrastinating work i actually have to do by making letterboxd lists #i think i got em all but feel free to let me know if i missed anyone #the round 3 lads are ranked by how high the percent of their winning vote was/how close they came to winning #but after that its just the order the polls were posted in because i Cannot Be Bothered #anyway im unreasonably invested in this thing despite not really liking men it's just fun I like it #can't wait for the actresses tournament <3

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noyzinerd · 1 year

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Rec links below the cut:

How to Pass a Take-Home Exam by dancinbutterfly, (note: not what I usually read since it has mpreg, but I gave it a shot and it honestly wasn't half bad, also this is a part 4 of a series)

A Sated City by ColetheWolf, (note: not Sterek, just Derek sleeping around, but he very specifically buys a frozen dinner in this one)

It was just a cupcake by thelittlestwolf

The Weight Of Living by thecomedownchampion

Full On Rainstorm by BarlowGirl

Trust Fall by stoney

Bogarted by HalfFizzbin, (note: sheriff doesn't call Derek son, but Derek admits to seeing the sheriff as a father-figure)

An Iceberg Named Stiles by orphan_account

Gorgeous by Asterekmess (Livinginfictions)

Bravery Is A Loaded Gun by LiviKate DefNotForWork, (note: the author was named LiviKate when I first found the fic, username has since been changed to DefNotForWork)

stuck in reverse by crazyassmurdererwall (smartalli)

First and Last and Always by sffan, (note: not a kiss, but Derek does automatically brace himself for rejection during a conversation, also this is a part 1 of 2)

For You There's No Warning by Zee (orphan_account)

Came Out Of The Woods By Choice by thensepia

will to follow through by owlpostagain

You Have Reached... by isthatbloodonhisshirt, (note: over the phone)

if you want my love you got it by vlieger

Bravery Is A Loaded Gun by LiviKate DefNotForWork, (note: the author was named LiviKate when I first found the fic, username has since been changed to DefNotForWork)

Walk me down your broken line by geordielover

For You There's No Warning by Zee (orphan_account)

Pretty Much a Big Deal by Dira Sudis (dsudis)

Love, Like A Death Sentence by DevilDoll

For You There's No Warning by Zee (orphan_account)

Life Because of It series by FiccinDylan, (note: series, but part 2, Mi Primo Miguel, is what I think embodies this theme the most)

Make You Believe by LittleLynn

Walk me down your broken line by geordielover, (note: these words are very, very close to being said, but they get choked off)

You Always Make A Bloody Mess by Sweetsyren

The More My Prayer (the lesser is my grace) by LadySlytherin

Kintsukuroi by Quixoticity

The Weight Of Living by thecomedownchampion

Kintsugi by artemis69

Trust Fall by stoney

Cuddly Therapy by alisvolatpropiis

Walk me down your broken line by geordielover

We've Written Volumes (in Blood and Scars and Ink) by notthequiettype

Safety In Silence by Survivah

Trust Fall by stoney

Cuddly Therapy by alisvolatpropiis

"Stiles, I was talking about the lasagna" by quackquackcey

will to follow through by owlpostagain, (note: not a small, shy smile, but just a rare, genuine smile that absolutely breaks Stiles' heart)

First and Last and Always by sffan

For You There's No Warning by Zee (orphan_account)

Are You Happy Now? by chasingshadows

For You There's No Warning by Zee (orphan_account)

Convenient by exclamation

Hard-Hitting by all-or-nothing-baby (BundleOfSoy)

Sick Day by dragon_temeraire, (note: last part of the It's Casual, Really series, also it's a friends-with-benefits relationship, that they both only agree on because they think it's the most they can ever get, that evolves)

Have It All by doc_sock, (note: this is the reverse, where Derek thinks they're friends with benefits and is terrified of Stiles being bored with him one day)

Gorgeous by Asterekmess (Livinginfictions)

Bravery Is A Loaded Gun by LiviKate DefNotForWork, (note: the author was named LiviKate when I first found the fic, username has since been changed to DefNotForWork)

Just For Now by linksofmemories_archive

Stepping Off the Razor's Edge by MissAnnThropic

You Saw Me Standing Alone by orphan_account

We've Written Volumes (in Blood and Scars and Ink) by notthequiettype, (note: Derek seems to know their dynamic pretty well, but Stiles is confused as fuck)

I Broke a Rule by isthatbloodonhisshirt

Five Times Derek and Stiles Had Casual Sex and One Time They Realized It Was Something More by 42hrb

Slide on over and forget it's wrong by linaerys

@isthatbloodonhisshirt, @colethewolf, @chasingshhadows, @quackquackcey, @artemis69, @optimismology, @ficcidylan, @devildoll, @dsudis, @sourwolph, @thecomedownchampion, @everything-a-wolf-could-want, @vlieger-fic, @owlpostagain, @crazyassmurdererwall, @asterekmess, @halffizzbin, @stoneyboboney, @all-or-nothing-baby, @exhuastedpigeon

Reply to @antobcq, follow up to this post [X]

#sterek #teen wolf #fic recs #answered #derek hale #stiles stilinski #tyler hoechlin #dylan o'brien #mieczysław stiles stilinski #y'all want recs I got yo recs guurl #I've been trying to tag all the authors' tumblrs but I'm still missing 17 and a few have deactivated their accounts #I'm not counting the orphaned accounts just in case they don't want to be associated with their old works anymore #If anyone knows of any of these authors' tumblrs I missed let me know #Updating and adding accounts as I stumble across them

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r0semultiverse · 8 months

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What changed Ice Prince Finn back to normal & where did he get a crown from?

Was Finn stealing a baby what ended up changing him as a person in the Farmworld universe? Similar to how Marceline kept Simon prime grounded & humane for a while.

Maybe Jay Mertens (I think that was his name, the eldest son) reminded him of his little brother too.

As for how the crown came back into the Farmworld reality, that would be because of whatever wacky effects are happening from Fionna & Cake going through the multiverse. Scarab was also messing with the multiversal TV's insides.

Going back to Farmworld Finn's little brother, maybe he was the one who broke the crown since I doubt a coward like the destiny gang leader would have been able to do it (or there's some sort of timeline loop going on with a bunch of the crowns that'll get shown later). This is assuming the little brother is alive, but we don't even know that for sure. There is just a lot we don't know.

edit: I see what y'all are saying about the old episode, seems like Prismo didn't wipe anyone's memories, he only made it so the crown would be destroyed. People still remember The Snow Man AKA Ice Prince Finn & what he did with all of that magical power. I also still think Jay Mertens could be the baby at the end of the flashback at the start of the episode.

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antihibikase-archive · 3 months

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It is incredibly isolating to navigate through fandom as an aromantic person. Aro experiences are so varied, and there is no definite aro experience that encapsulates the alienation that fandom spaces cause for certain people.

Fandom is mostly built and structured on shipping. And if not, the blorbofication of characters, which tends to go down the shipping pipeline; where does that leave the romance repulsed aro person who genuinely does not want to see any form of shipping? Platonic dynamics, right?

Yeah, sure. But by platonic dynamics, it's only "best friends" or "family" right? Where does that leave the aro folks with undefined labels? No, qprs aren't a get-out-of-jail card.

And qprs- they have no rules or standards set upon them by society, not even having a clear definition for what it is, because not all qprs are the same. Yet, for some reason, it ended up becoming the "nonbinary" option to a lot of people- not romantic or "regular" platonic? Qpr it is, right?

But where does that leave the aro folk who don't want a qpr? Who don't wish to see characters depicted in pairs or trios or so forth- who embrace the lack of a partner?

And these concepts presented; when aro folk talk about them, do you care? And if you do, do you understand? Do you try to?

If you aren't aro, but wish to be supportive, are you a genuine ally? Do you raise the concerns of aro folk you share the space with?

Or do you take a look at these concepts- and decide you understand them "well" enough? Do you decide to speak for aro folks instead?

Do you depict relationships outside of romance because you believe in the importance of platonic relationships? Will you accept the fact that not all platonic interactions will be familial or "best friends"?

Can you accept depictions of qprs outside of "more than friends, less than lovers"? Are you willing to accept it is not just "best friends" or "romance lite"? Will you accept that nothing is inherently romantic- and characters in a qpr may fall under your standards of lovers?

Can you resist the urge to put every character in a pair or trio or group? Are you comfortable with the notion of characters finding more joy in being by themselves, outside of all those lenses you see them in?

It's good if you can.

And if you can't, at the very least, do you understand why some aro folk in your space are upset? Embittered by your favorite ships? Starving for representation?

Did you depict these characters with these concepts with the knowledge that aromanticism is fluid?

#antihibikase.txt #Long Post #((I'm sorry. I have been thinking about this for weeks and I am unhappy.))#((Honestly? I have been feeling more and more isolated in fandom recently.))#((It hurts. I know non aro folks are trying.))#((And its hard to describe. It's alienating.))#((And the typical fandom response is more representation- which is well-meaning.))#((But. Specifically to non aro folk. When you depict these aro concepts are you normal about them.))#((Do you do so respectfully.))#((Reminder that qprs are not restricted to aro folks btw.))#((I'm so so tired. It's easy to say you care but then completely miss the mark.))#((And just in case- this is NOT alluding to anyone. Please allow me to let my rage be my own.))#((Or to share this with those who understand.))#((And if you as a non aro person feel attacked by this- sorry.))#((I did my best to word this as firmly as possible without sounding angry because I am aware that-))#((-many will read this in bad faith.))#((Okay to reblog btw.))#((This isn't one of my usual rambles despite it being under my txt tag.))

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quinloki · 1 month

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Canon Characters vs OC vs x Reader

Disclaimer: This is just my two cents, and my perspective on things, and I'm not trying to lay down the law for everyone. I needed to just put this to words though, in order to sleep.

I was thinking about this because of a post I saw, and some, we'll say, kind of useless comments associated with the post. Mean-spirited stuff.

Normally, in one ear and out the other, but the vibes just kicked me off down a rabbit hole of sorts an I wanted to try to put some of my thoughts to words.

First, some style vibes:

Canon x Canon Canon/Canon stories are, to me, like reading an episode of that show. I'm sitting down in front of a TV or whatever, and I'm experiencing the story As A Viewer. I like this style because I don't really have to expend much energy and I just kind of roll with whatever's happening. Generally some sort of 3rd person perspective.

OC x canon OC/Canon stories are like being on a carnival ride. I'm sitting in a car on a roller-coaster, and maybe the OC is sitting next me. I'm experiencing the story more deeply than strictly canon stories, but my connection with the OC is no deeper than say, my connection with Katniss Everdeen when I read The Hunger Games. Sometimes 3rd person, sometimes first person.

Reader x canon Reader/Canon (or Reader x/ OC) is like putting on a VR helmet. I don't get much physical input about the "Reader OC" because I'm experiencing the story through their eyes. I don't expect the reader to be me, but there's a bigger feeling of immersion to be had. Some description might happen cause it's relevant to the story, and it's still a type of ride, I can't jump the rails on the roller coaster, after all. (Even with a VN you still follow the tracks). Sometimes first person, sometimes second person (I'm partial to 2nd person perspective, but that's just me).

I love Fan Fiction, I love it. All of it, and man even more than anything, what I love is that I'm going to dislike 80% of it. Because that 80% was written for someone who is not me. (Hell, that number's probably closer to 99% if we're looking at ALL fandoms, but I digress).

Second - The VENT:

What got me the most in the post that prompted this, was someone saying "Bring back the Mary Sue OCs!" and then they went on to describe something more detailed, and I just -

Look, respectfully, fuck you.

The point is, you're not going to be happy no matter what. Whether it's "mary sue" OCs, or x readers, or alternative universes, or a ship you don't like, you're going to find something to be unhappy about.

Cause people have been bitching about all styles of fan fiction since the first "You've Got Mail" chimed in 1991. And until 1998 and ff.net you really had to hunt for it, and until 2007 and Ao3 the idea of tagging a fic for any reason wasn't really a thing. Every click was a surprise! \o/

I just have seen the same song and dance a dozen times. It's exhausting. People become okay with OCs and decide x readers are the enemy, and before that OCs were *all* Mary Sues and cringe and people who made OCs were the enemy, and before OCs people who wrote even a little OOC were the enemy, and people who wrote AUs were the enemy, and you can write fan fic but it HAS to be Canon Compliant, and everyone MUST be in-character at all times - "They would not fucking say that" was the enemy.

Look, just please - please - in any capacity, stop it with the "All X style of story telling is crap" mindset. There's over a dozen different ways to do x readers alone. I know 20 x reader writers and I don't think any of us have the same style, preferences, or vibes.

I've had a lot of comments along the lines of "I thought I hated x readers, but I really loved this." on a few different fics I've written. Sometimes it's not the style of the fic, sometimes it's the style of the writer, and my Brother In Christ - you're going to have to read some awful shit to shuffle through the thousands of writers out there to find the vibes that resonate with you.

Ostracizing entire swathes of fan fic because you need something to be "The Enemy" so you can lift up something else, and then bitching you can't find anything new to read seems like a personal problem.

And I know y'all are scrolling by TONS of posts that don't interest you, every day, as a matter of course. So don't give me that "clogging up the tag" BS, because we deserve to be here same as anyone else in the fandom.

#quin grumbles #I'm so aggravated I don't even really know how to tag this #like almost 30 years of it I'm just so done #I just wonder what amazing stories we're not getting #cause of some fucker using Mary Sue to belittle someone #or someone beating someone else over the head with plot armor because their protag survived something terrible?#How many “Oh.” moments have been missed because someone criticized the very concept of reader insert?#I'm way past my usual bedtime so I'm just rambling at this point #and I am being meaner than I'd like #but JFC #I'm not going to let people's bullshit opinions stop me or anyone else from writing if I can avoid it.#Write what you want #gush about it #talk about it #TELL ME ABOUT IT #IDGAF if it's cringe or overpowered or broken or flawless or an OC or a reader with a name or WHATEVER #If it brings you joy #then do it #and if people are too mean to scroll by it when it's not their thing #and then complain like they're entitled to do so #block 'em.#and tell me who they are so I can block them too #then write more #cause I promise it'll bring someone else joy too

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yourmythicalbest · 1 month

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best rhett and link vocals in no specific order, according to me, a classically trained opera singer who still cares too much about rhett and link

youtube

#rhett and link #good mythical morning #gmm #HEY RHETT AND LINK #UNPRIVATE THE SONGS FOR WHEN #AND ALL OF THE OTHER BITS YOU HAVE HIDDEN FROM MEEEEEE #LONG TIME NO SEE GUYS #so a lot of these are older or live because i think they sound a million times better without piles of pitch correction #but damn i just fucking love their voices #i miss the harmonies and their vocal blend #truth be told i've been listening to nonstop bee gees since 2020 and it makes my brain go brrrrrrr #because the vocal blend and harmonies are unparalleled #but fuck if rhett and link don't scratch that same itch for me #it's been really good to be on my rhett and link bullshit lately #and i figured if there was anyone still active that follows me here #i might pop in and say hi #and let you know i'm still alive and a fan #Youtube

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agrebel18 · 1 year

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Friendly reminder that ALOT OF CHARACTERS changed appearance in the timeskip, so PLEASE REFRAIN from drawing Luz with straight hair, don’t draw Amity skinny like a stick because I recently found out that her bodytype is more like Odalia’s, and JUST BECAUSE Willow looks a little skinny in a few panels IS NOT AN EXCUSE to skinny wash her either, and don’t PURPOSELY ignore Gus’s new haircut or Raine’s and Hunter’s scars!!!

#we don't erase people's features here!!#also let me know if I'm missing anyone else that might get their features erased!!#toh #the owl house #toh spoilers

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softpine · 9 days

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i love scene baby coco SO MUCH <33 wcif the kirby belt, the green tank, the i love causing drama t-shirt, the oversized hoodie and the black cargo trousers please? hope you get well soon!

thank you!! 💖

kirby belt

invader zim tank (it's not in the previews, but it is in there as EmoScenePJs! it's a full body outfit)

black cargo pants (i can't find these exact ones, but here's a similar one and another option) + the keychains acc

oversized hoodie

i love causing drama t-shirt

#if anyone knows those cargo pants please let me know because they're not showing in tray importer #or i'm just missing them somehow which i wouldn't doubt because the first time i made this i wrote ''6'' twice #and there's not even a sixth pic.....#wcif #asks #nonsims #brandi answers #scrimblotrait

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kill-vonkarma-again · 19 days

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hi girlies i made a whole powerpoint abt this cuz i kept thinking abt it and i like to think im very funny. dont look at this if you're decidedly a fan of godot you'll just be mad at me and we will all end up having a worse day. all just for funsies and an outlet for me to infodump tbqh. you need libreoffice to open this and have it work and display properly because i'm a pretentious hipster who hates google and microsoft but it's easy enough to use and figure out o7

(spoilers for every ace attorney game that features a prosecutor. which is all of them. you've been warned)

IMPORTANT UPDATE a catastrophic bug i didnt catch while i was putting the last details on this hit the powerpoint before i could catch it. should be fixed now please use the updated link 👍

#ace attorney #the great ace attorney #gir bitching #i'm also a barok hater. significantly less sorry about that #also i don't THINK i'm missing anyone that doesn't fall under the criteria i set but if i am definitely let me know #i say this because i almost completely forgot lana and im so fucking sorry to her

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flowercrowngods · 6 months

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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.

you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.

and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts

#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with #is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain #i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself #that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once #but never never never liked enough #i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting #i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out #i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again #but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough #for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find #maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months #anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you #god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie #but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down #blah #personal #not st

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mel-loly · 4 months

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-“Oh, school has to be something serious, especially this year/something like that!”

The things I did when I was at school (especially in computer class):

TW: cigarette

I have a lot of memories, and this is certainly one of the most important/best/funniest in my life. I'm really going to miss everything... and I'm already crying lol..

#yes. I did that- and my friends loved that stuff <33 #*sigh* I'm really going to miss it.. I'm not ready to be someone older... (I really hate the future)#and I'm not posting anything yet because I'm waiting for christmas day to me come back. that's why I'm not answering anyone #when I get back. I'll kind of try to have more content and answer you guys. but for now I want some time...#I want my year to end in a different way.#like- full of memories. the ones that made me laugh the most. these are the ones I really want to remember..#I don't want to leave aside everything I've experienced this year. and in all these last years actually.#I want to remember them. I want to make them become stories so I can tell other people how much I had fun..#and I hope that even I will enter a new life. I can also have other stories to tell and have fun!#with other people. and maybe. with my friends too..#so- yeah. I'm mel. and hope if you read this. say something.. to let me know that you care or something...#i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog #my memes #?#my memories #my memories of school #my memories at school

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nellasbookplanet · 5 months

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Every now and again I'm reminded of how fundamentally different ttrpg liveplays are as a storytelling medium from literally any other and it drives me a little bit bonkers. So much comes down to chance; you can plan and strategize and have some absolutely wild modifiers, but if you roll a nat 1 you still roll a nat 1. It doesn’t matter how important a character is to the narrative and how many plans the players have for them, they can still die at any time and be inevitably lost because the dice told you, sorry, resurrection didn’t work this time. And then we build the narrative around that, an echoing hole that can never be mended, because we have no other choice but to move one.

You never know if a risky choice will be rewarded or punished. You can go into what looks like an easy fight and lose bitterly due to bad luck, or into what should be an impossible one and still win. You will never be reassured by the knowledge that it’s a prewritten, planned out story where some things are bound to happen for maximum narrative impact.

But neither will moments feel cheapened by the knowledge that it was always bound to happen. A character comes back to life in a movie and, well, you know it’s because the narrative needed them and they were never truly at risk; they come back in the game and you know just how easily the dice could have landed on a different number and it wouldn’t have mattered how needed they were.

It can, if we allow it, remind us that purpose and meaning in real life has nothing to do with inevitability or fate; it’s all about what we make it, the choices that arise out of chance, the consequences that come from choice. We create our own narrative out of inherent meaninglessness and chaos and it is beautiful.

#every time the critical role fandom loses it bc someone decides a fight was unfair I'm reminded of all those incredibly narrow survivals #remember when nott survived that blue dragon with 1 HP?#when they only escaped their first lucien fight bc his anti magic cone missed them with the narrowest of margins?#not to mention ashton's recent absolutely wild survival #when everyone told robbie to have his character run at then end of candela obscura chapter 1 bc everyone else was down #and victory seemed impossible - but he didn't and it save them all #or let us not forget the absolutely WILD molly/kingsley resurrection #not victory feels unearned but that would not be true if the stakes weren’t real #we need the occasional iron shepherd or otohan fight that downs the entire party #and before anyone tries to tell me YES i do know ttrpgs also have prewritten and planned elements i do have basic media awareness #it's that intersection of narrative choice and chance that creates absolute gold on occasion #nella talks

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moonchild-in-blue · 10 days

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Thank you for the tag @tonguetyd! My spoons are indeed low but my sleep schedule is GONE so. Random burst of energy let's go.

I didn't know what artist to pick because I didn't want an obvious (?) one, so I'm going super niche and choosing Bright Eyes because it's been a minute since I've talked about them, and they're one of my favourites 💙

Artist: Bright Eyes

How do you feel: Nothing Gets Crossed Out

What is your gender: Bowl Of Oranges (obviously funny but also it's a beautiful song! poetic storytelling!)

If you could go anywhere: Lua

Favorite mode of transportation: Driving Fast Through A Big City At Night (yes that is the title)

Your best friend: First Day Of My Life 🥹

Favorite time of day: Sunrise, Sunset

If your life was a tv show: A Line Allows Progress, A Circle Does Not

Relationship status: I Won't Ever Be Happy Again 🥲

Your fear: Waste Of Paint

Idk who made this or not so I'm tagging randomly, no pressure to do this whatsoever! @dearscone @corviisquire @hookedhobbies @politemagic (hi!) @leonsleftbicep @melit0n

#okay i made myself sad again #so little story time!#(okay i talked briefly about past suicide/sh struggles so be warned!)#First Day Of My Life is their most famous song AND is probably my mostest favourite love song in the entire world #like. this particular song means so much to me #there is this line that goes “this is the first day of my life. i'm glad i didn't die before i met you”#and it breaks my heart into a million pieces because that is just. so true. so pure #because for someone who was very suicidal and struggled with sh *just before* i met my best friend(s)#it's a lot. like. that could've been me. and yet i'm here. and i need to hold on more because there's still so many people to meet #and so many things to see and experience. i AM glad i didn't die before i met any of you #it's crazy to think how many things i would've missed if every single time i thought about about ending it i had actually done it #whack #also! nothing gets crossed out is incredibly depressing and poignant! if anyone is in the mood for that!#(most if not all of these are. once again i am incapable of choosing happy songs lmao)#tw suicide mention #tw sh mention #<- is this enough? let me know if i should use other tags!!!!#tag game #darya's mixtape #bright eyes

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bookish-library · 6 months

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Love letter to languages that are not English (as a native English speaker).

Your languages are so cool. Not only cool, but they are also so pretty, hearing people speak Spanish, or French, or Portuguese sounds like something out of this world in the best way possible.

To Spanish speakers: (personas que hablan Español)

Gosh yall sound amazing. From the incredible feat of rolling your "r's" (as someone who cannot no matter how hard I try) to how your letters interact in a way that English wishes it could, yall sound beautiful. The way of describing things is so beautiful, especially in song, everything is so romantic and described in a way that english cannot achieve. Your different ways to say "I love you", the weight each one of them carries, how your language bonds you together, strangers or no. I have been learning Spanish for around 4 years now, and I cannot get enough of it. Your music (I love Missa and Evan Craft) and the beautiful lyricism has me nearly in tears sometimes, yall have a way of saying things that english songs don't. I love the Spanish language and all that comes with it.

To French speakers: (personnes qui parle francais)

Your language is on a whole 'nother level because wow. Between the one pronunciation sound of about 7 different words that somehow all almost sound the same yet mean vastly different words and the way your words are built, English could never come close lol. Yall somehow have the ability to make noises within words and vowels that my mouth simply does not understand how to do (not from lack of trying), and yall someone manage to sound fierce, gentle, and graceful within one word. Your language is kicking my butt on duolingo lol, but it is worth it to try and learn this language. I first got into French because of Miraculous Ladybug, and yalls music is so fun. I love papa ou te [I think I spelled that right], as well as songs by Lnni Kim.

To the Portugese speakers: (pessoas que falam portugues)

Yall are so cool. Your language sounds like a friend you have not seen in a long time, but are finally meeting them once more, and they have changed, but they are still the friend you know. You've got vowels that english would have to amalgamate other vowel to even try and achieve a semblance, and you've got wayyyy more curses than english does lol. Your language reminds me of if French and Spanish had a really cool kid, that kid would be Portugese. It's rapid-fire fast, and yet somehow takes each step with grace. I cannot wait to learn this language, to attempt to wrap my head around this beautiful language.

This next part is just personal reflection

The qsmp has allowed me to learn so much about the world around me. I am finding that I can understand Spanish so much faster than I could before, and while I may not be the best speaker, just being able to listen and understand is such a fun experience. Though I do not know portugese, my experience with Spanish has allowed me to get a glimpse into this language, especially with watching Cellbit and Roier interact. Being able to at least slightly keep up with their rapid fire conversations feels like such an achievement to me, and has def inspired me to try and learn portugese one day. I am trying to learn French right now, because of traveling to France for irl events soon, and I want to be able to interact with people on their own turf. French is kicking my butt lol, but to be able to pick up words here and there on streams, or to understand bits and pieces of the songs I am singing is such a fun feeling. Getting to hear other songs that have such different rhythms, instruments, or tone is so cool, and if anyone has any reccomendations in any language, I would love to hear them. (Une fille de soleil by Lou and Adryano is a favorite, especially since it blends french and spanish) Qsmp is such an amazing project, and I love every time the cc's get into discussions about their language, or trade slang, or teach each other words. So excited to continue this language journey!

#Sorry if I misspelled anything or missed accents #my keyboard hates me and the only language I can speak confidently (ish) is Spanish 😅#I just love this server and what it has done so much #This is brought to you by watching coco en Español and marveling at the beauty of the lyrics and what they mean #(El latido de mi corazon I'm looking at you)#Qsmp #For the library #Language discussion #Tried to write everything out so that it was easily translatable but let me know if something needs clarification!#And if anyone wants to talk in any other language #They are welcome!#Learning new things especially something as personal as a language is such an honor and so much fun #I spent like 30 min writing this lol no regrets

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saintmachina · 5 months

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I miss all the dark academia kids from my 2010s tumblr era. I wondered what happened to all of us, if we kept pursuing the beautiful, deeply examined life, if we finally reached those heights of ecstasy we were always grasping for, if we truly did sacrifice what was dear to us in the pursuit of knowledge undying. There's a whole new generation of seekers now to take up the dark academia torch, and many of them are writing amazing books and taking stunning photographs and critiquing the subculture in ways it ought to be critiqued.

But I wonder about so many of those undergraduates who made up my class of kids, pouring their hearts out onto their blogs, posing proudly in their thrifted blazers and toasting with wine in their chipped teacups. They were friends to me when I felt alone in the world, and I wish we had kept in better touch. I can still faintly feel their echos in the code around here, like digital ghosts.

#don't mind me i'm just being broody #and I know some of you are still around and still making gorgeous content #but a lot of us fell off and went our seperate ways #dark academia #thoughts #i WILL delete this if anyone gets weird in my comments let me brew in my nostalgia for friends I dearly miss #it's so strange getting old enough to really miss people

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