#you just dont want to fuck with sepsis
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My mom is headed to the ER. Her port is having issues and they're worried about sepsis.
#stuff sarah says#im hoping since shes on antibiotics and is going in with a low fever that theyll be able to catch it quick enough#and the fever could be from the regular infection#you just dont want to fuck with sepsis#anyway. drinking a v strong black russian rn...
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Mission save the human race pt.4
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TW: Breeding kink, Rough sex , Smut, degrading
Before you could realize what was happening, Simon had already grabbed you and carried you down to the room where Johnny was. He was faster with you in his hands than you could be on your own.
You thought he was getting better. He lay in the bed, uncovered, his body glistening full of sweat, and he was shaking. Fever, possible sepsis—fuck, fuck.
You dont have any medication to save him from sepsis - if that were the case. You could stop a fever with your trinkets and the medication you prepared. Hell, you could try this natural healing stuff your grandma swore by, but you are fucked right now, and Johnny too. You can't panic; you need to stay calm for Simon's sake and his friend's sake. They'd make your attempts to save Johnny even worse if they knew how overwhelmed you are right now.
"Cold water, towels, onions, and Paracetamol now." Simon immediately ran down, gathering all the things you would need to save Johnny.
"What the fuck?" Kyle questioned.
"I don't have anything better. As long as none of you are ready to raid a hospital now, this must do the job," I screamed at him.
"Where is the nearest hospital?" John asked.
"16 miles away."
"We will be back in a day. What do you need?"
"Paracetamol, Morphine, Tylenol, gloves, new surgical equipment, as many disinfection wipes or solutions as you can get, new bandages, everything you can get."
"Yes, ma'am," Alex chanted.
The boys left the house in minutes, fully equipped with gear. If you weren't so focused on Johnny's safety, you'd notice the ache between your legs as soon as you saw them with your gear and how Kyle kissed you goodbye with so much passion.
"Gathered the stuff." Simon came up with all the things in his bulky arms. You took the towels and soaked them in cold water, putting them on his muscular legs. Simon watched every movement, making sure you saved his Johnny.
"It's just a fever, probably, and John went away with the others to gather some stuff from a nearby hospital."
"I can't lose him."
"I know."
You repeated that procedure for over an hour until his fever went down. He was still a bit drowsy, but he was safe.
"You saved him again."
"I did."
------------------------------------
Two days later, Johnny was as healthy as he could be. He still slept a lot, but he woke up more often. And he was a pain in the ass; he never took his medication and always flirted with you, telling you that you're a pure angel and that he can't wait to finally be on his feet again. And how the others wouldn't be able to put some cubs in you like he could.
You would be lying to yourself if you said you weren't charmed by him. He made butterflies pop up in your stomach, and when you saw him kissing Simon, it was over for you. You wanted both so badly. The others still haven't returned from their raid, so you lay on the couch with Ghost, reading a book; he gave you one of his shirts to wear around the house.
"Can we cuddle a bit? It's getting cold in here."
"Sure, go ahead," he replied, sitting back down on the couch. He patted the spot next to him, indicating for you to join him. As you curled up against him, he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer. "What are you reading?" His eyes glistened with interest. You waited years for someone to be interested in you, and now you had five men—well, seven—but you didn't meet the other two, who were completely interested in you.
"Just a romance novel," you replied shortly. You knew it was a bit steamy, but you didn't want to tell him.
"Ah, I see. Well, make sure you share the juicy parts with me," Simon teased. He leaned his head against yours and started to flip through the pages of the book. "This isn't too bad," he commented after a few minutes. "Oh, do you like these things?" He pointed to a passage where the male spanked the woman, and you couldn't stop blushing; of course, you liked that.
"No, it's embarrassing when you read it. Stop, Simon."
Simon chuckled and closed the book, setting it down on the coffee table. "Alright, alright, I was just trying to be nice," he said, pretending to be hurt by your response. He leaned back onto the couch, letting out a content sigh.
You leaned against him, burying your face in his pecks. You lingered in his smell; he smelled fantastic, like sandalwood and pine. You inhaled his scent and sighed contentedly.
Simon's eyes closed as you buried your face in his chest. He could feel his heart racing and his breath becoming short. This wasn't supposed to happen, he told himself. But the warmth of your body against him, the softness of your skin—it was all too much.
"Si, do you think we are alone for a long time?" You wondered when the others would come back.
Simon opened his eyes and looked down at you. "Honestly, I don't know," he said quietly. "We could be here for hours, or we could be interrupted at any moment." He reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair away from your face.
"You saw Alex and me, didn't you?"
"Yes"
"He made me feel good," he did; in fact, he made you feel desired. Every one of them did, but in different ways, but you still weren't sure about Simon. He loved Johnny, and even if both of them desired you, they had each other. Maybe they just wanted to use you as an incubator to get them a child, but nothing more. Alex at least gave you the feeling of truly respecting you, while Price worshiped the ground you walked on. Johnny was amazed by your appearance, but Simon awakened a lust in you.
Simon frowned at your comment. "Alex made you feel good?" he asked, trying to keep his voice even. "Is that why you went to him instead of me?" He sounded jealous. How did they agree on sharing you when all of them were so possessive and jealous all the time?
"No, look, I'm just sometimes not sure if you see me like that. In one moment, you're cuddling me, and in the other moment, you glare at me like I'm some scum."
Simon sighed heavily, knowing he'd messed up. "I'm sorry," he said sincerely. "I don't mean to treat you like that. It's just... sometimes I get frustrated and take it out on you." He paused for a moment.
"I can understand that with Johnny's injury, it took a toll on you."
"Yeah, well, that's no excuse," Simon said with a frown. "I should be able to handle my emotions better than that." He paused for a moment before reaching out to gently squeeze your hand.
"Did you like how I took good care of him?"
Simon hesitated before speaking. "It was nice of you to help him, but I wish I would have been able to be as useful as you," he said eventually.
"You aren't useless. I'm useless. I can't even use a fucking gun," you admitted.
"Yeah, well, things are complicated," Simon admitted. He squeezed your hand again before letting go and standing up. "I'm gonna go take a shower or bath or whatever you call this."
"It would be good in times like this to save some water," you said cheekily, sounding like a fucking man on Tinder. You needed to improve your flirting skills.
Simon rolled his eyes but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Alright, smartass," he muttered under his breath before heading into the bathroom to clean himself.
You were thinking of joining him, but you didn't want to intrigue him or make him uncomfortable.
You thought about using the short alone time you had to acknowledge the ache between your legs. You slowly started to remove the lingerie under his oversized shirt and rub your clit. It felt so good; you missed Alex's touch and John's. You needed them all.
You started to finger yourself, pumping your short fingers in and out in frustration since they didn't reach the right spot. You were so concentrated on getting the slightest bit of satisfaction that you didn't notice him joining the room again.
Your one hand was pinching your hardened nipple, the other fingering your sweet spot, your back ached, and you noticed how you got closer to the sweet release you needed: "Fuck Simon, fuck me."
Simon couldn't help but chuckle at the sight before him. You were so caught up in your pleasure that you didn't even notice he was there. He stepped closer, his hard-on tenting his towel, as he watched you pinch your nipple and finger yourself.
"Mhm, fuck," you whined as you slipped in another finger. The sound of your moan and the sight of your fingers sliding in and out of your moist folds sent a shudder of desire through him. You were so wet and eager for release; it made him want to pull you up for a rough fuck.
He slowly started to stroke himself. The sight of his shirt coated in your juices only made him harder. He loved the thought of you being so turned on by him that you couldn't help but cum all over his clothes. "Mmm, you're such a dirty little slut."
"What? Oh god, Simon, how long are you watching?" you said, removing your fingers that were coated from your throbbing core in embarrassment. In all your years alive, you had never been caught masturbating before.
"Long enough to see you get yourself off," Simon smirked in response, his voice laced with amusement. The smell of your arousal, mixed with the steam from the shower, was driving him wild. His cock twitched at the thought of being buried deep inside you.
"Oh fuck, I'm so sorry, I was just so woken up."
"Don't apologize," Simon said, his voice low and rough. He stepped closer, his towel dropping to the floor as he revealed his erect cock. "I quite enjoyed watching you pleasure yourself."
You swallowed as you saw his hard-on. When you thought John was big, you were wrong. Simon was massive; he had at least 9 inches. How was this even possible? He was deliciously curved with an oh my god, is that a piercing?
"Oh god, it's fucking big. How does that fit in someone?" he just smirked before replying.
"I'll make sure it fits perfectly inside you," Simon replied, a sinister grin spreading across his face. He walked towards you, his massive cock bobbing with each step.
"Now, why don't you take care of that for me?"
You glided down on your knees in front of him, licking all over his tip and savoring his delicious pre cum "Oh god, I love your piercing down there."
Simon let out a low groan as you began to worship his cock, your tongue flicking over the piercing at the tip. "Yes, I have one," he said, his voice thick with desire. "Now suck on it and show me how much you want my cock inside you."
"Will it hurt if you fuck me?" You couldn't deny the fear of his dick splitting you in half.
"It might initially, but trust me, it'll feel fantastic," Simon replied, running his fingers through your hair. His other hand gripped your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. "I promise I'll take it slow and make sure you're ready for my cock."
You slowly wrapped your mouth around his cock, trying to fit it all in your sweet mouth, but it was too big. You almost gagged, and tears fell on your beautiful cheeks from the sudden loss of air.
Simon couldn't help but chuckle as he watched you struggle to take his cock in your mouth. "You're doing great, baby girl," he said, pulling back slightly. "Just take it slow and try not to choke."
You slowly bobbed your head up and down, and his tip hit your throat. Simon couldn't help but let out a moan as you bobbed your head up and down his shaft. The feeling of your soft lips and warm tongue wrapped around him was driving him wild. "Fuck, that feels good," he muttered, reaching down to stroke your hair gently.
Simon's hips began to thrust involuntarily as you continued to suck on his cock, your moans vibrating against his shaft. He gripped your hair tighter, pulling you away from him slightly. "Fuck, Babygirl, you're killing me."
You grabbed his balls and squeezed them in a teasing manner.
Simon groaned deeply, feeling the pleasure shoot through his body. "God, that's it," he murmured, pushing into your mouth again as you began to stroke his balls gently. "You're such a naughty little slut." The mixture of degradation and praise made you go crazy.
You bobbed your head faster, and Simon's moans turned into grunts as you took him deeper into your mouth, the head of his cock brushing against the back of your throat. His hips bucked forward, pushing against your face as he lost control. "I'm going to cum," As he felt his orgasm approaching, Simon gripped your hair tighter, pulling you away from his cock just enough for him to slide it out of your mouth. "Swallow," he commanded, his voice dark and demanding.
You swallowed it, but it was way too much; it ran down from the curve of your lips to your perfect breasts, making you look like a painting.
Simon watched as you swallowed his cum, a mix of satisfaction and pride filling him up. He admired the sight of it running down your breasts, making them glisten in the dim light. "That's my good girl," he praised, reaching out to cup one of your breasts. He scoped the cum from your nipples, putting it in your mouth.
He smirked as he watched you clean his fingers with your tongue, enjoying the taste of his cum. "You're such a dirty little slut," he said, his voice low and seductive. "But I love every fucking second of it."
"I'm not a slut; I'm a good girl," you protested.
Simon raised an eyebrow at your comment. "Is that so? Then why are you sucking my cock and letting me cum all over your face and tits?" he asked, his tone full of sarcasm. "Sounds like slutty behavior to me."
"Because I'm a good girl, and good girls satisfy their men."
Simon couldn't help but chuckle at your response. "Well, I guess that makes sense," he admitted, his grip on your breast tightening slightly. "You're a good girl when it comes to pleasing me."
"Can you maybe return the favor?" you asked shyly.
Simon grinned at your request. "Of course, baby girl," he said, reaching down to stroke your pussy. "You've been such a good girl for me today; I think it's only fair that I return the favor."
He admired the sight of your wet pussy, glistening in the dim light. "Fuck, you're so fucking sexy," he growled.
"I need your tongue there, please."
With a devilish grin, Simon leaned down and teased your sensitive folds with his tongue. "You want my tongue, huh?" he asked before pushing past your entrance and thrusting his tongue deep inside you. Simon chuckled at your moan as he continued to lick and probe your tight little pussy. He loved the way you responded to him, especially when you begged for more. "That's it, baby," he whispered between licks.
"Fuck Simon, so good."
Simon loved hearing you moan his name. It only fueled his desire for you more. With one hand on your hip, he used the other to slide two fingers inside you, finding your G-spot and massaging it while his tongue continued to lap at your pussy like a hungry dog. "That's right, baby," Simon growled against your wet folds. "You like that? You want more?"
He picked up the pace, his fingers thrusting deeper inside you as he sucked harder on your clit.
"Yes, please, more feels so good."
He grinned at your enthusiastic response. "Good girl," he praised you, sliding his fingers in and out of you while still working your clit with his tongue. "You're so wet for me. You taste so fucking divine."
"Please Si"
"Please, what, baby?" Simon asked, lifting his head to look down at you with a smirk. "You want to feel even better?" He asked, sliding his fingers deeper inside you before circling his thumb around your hard, swollen clit.
"Make me cum, please. Simon's thumb began to rub circles around your clit, making you squirm beneath him.
"Cum for me, baby girl," he demanded, his voice rough and full of desire. "I want to see you lose control." You came on his tongue, screaming, whining, and shaking. Simon felt you tighten around his fingers as your orgasm hit, and he couldn't resist sucking harder on your clit to milk every last drop of pleasure from you.
He loved the way you screamed and whined, your body shaking with the intensity of your release.
"Stop Stop it too much."
Simon smirked as he felt your walls clenching around his fingers, knowing that you were on the brink of squirting. "Go ahead, baby," he encouraged you. "Let it all out for me."
"Mhm, fuck Simon too much."
Simon chuckled as you begged him to stop, but he couldn't resist the urge to push you further. With one hand, he gently pressed against your belly to make it even worse, while he continued to stimulate your clit with the other. "You like being controlled?"
You tried to move your legs away, pushing them together, not wanting to lose control.
Simon watched as you tried unsuccessfully to move your legs away. He smiled cruelly at your futile efforts before tightening his grip on your thighs. "I think you need to learn who's really in charge here," he growled.
Simon relished in the power he had over you as he brought you to yet another orgasm. He could see the pleasure and frustration warring on your face, and it only fueled his desires. "Do you like feeling so helpless?"
"Yes, Simon," you whined, enjoying his dominant behavior.
"Good girl," Simon praised you, his voice thick with satisfaction. He continued to tease you, pressing his fingers inside you just a little bit deeper each time, seeking out any remaining pleasure centers within your tight little pussy.
He started to place small slaps on your abused clit.
"Ahh, fuck."
Simon moaned as he felt your walls clench around his fingers. The combination of pleasure and pain from your reactions was addictive. He couldn't help but increase the intensity of both, slapping your clit harder with each passing moment. With a hard slap, you came a fifth time, squirting all over his face - coating him completely, and the couch under you,
He let out a low growl of satisfaction as he felt your pussy clenching tightly around his fingers one last time before releasing them from their grip.
"I'm sorry," you said.
"Don't apologize," Simon murmured, his gaze lingering on you. "That was fucking beautiful; you taste like pure heaven."
You looked at his throbbing dick, reaching for it.
Simon saw the look in your eyes and grinned, wrapping his hand around his throbbing erection. "You want more?" he asked, already knowing the answer. "You're such a greedy little slut," he teased you before guiding his cock to your entrance. You winced as he put it inside you, inch for inch.
"I know it's big, but you can take it," Simon grunted, his eyes locked on yours as he began to pound into you. The head of his cock hit your cervix with each powerful stroke, filling you.
You were so tight around him that it felt like heaven itself was wrapped around his shaft.
Feeling your legs wrap around his hips, Simon groaned low in pleasure. The sensation of being so tightly held while he thrust into you was exquisite. He reached down between your bodies, his fingers finding their way to your clit.
"No too much, Si."
Simon couldn't help but laugh at your attempts to pull him out. "I told you it was going to be big," he teased, slamming himself into you harder. His hand on your clit moved faster, his fingers tracing over the sensitive nub.
"Hurts so good," you admitted.
"You like pain, then?" Simon growled, his face twisted with lust and anger. With one last hard push, he buried himself deep within you, as far as he could go. "Say it, you fucking slut. Tell me you love it."
"I love it when you're rough with me, Si," you moaned. He felt like heaven and hell at the same time inside of you. His big cum-loaded balls hit your ass all over again, leaving his mark on you.
"Fuck yes, you do," Simon hissed, grabbing your hips and slamming himself into you over and over again. His fingers on your clit were relentless, rubbing in circles to drive you closer to the edge. "I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk straight," Simon warned, his voice low and rough. He pulled out of you with a wet pop and spun you around, pushing you on all fours and arching your back.
Simon slammed himself into you from behind, his hands gripping your hips as he thrust into you with all his strength. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, and he could feel you clenching around him, trying to keep up with his powerful strokes.
Simon's fingers dug into your hips as he pounded into you, his breathing becoming ragged. "You like that?" He asked roughly, knowing the answer well. "You love it when I take you hard and rough, don't you?"
"Yes Si"
Simon's pace quickened, his movements becoming more frantic as he reached the edge of release. He leaned down and bit your shoulder, growling incoherently as he felt himself about to cough. "Your pussy is so fucking tight."
As you begged him for more, Simon's cock throbbed even harder, the head hitting your cervix with each powerful thrust. He grabbed your hair and pulled your head back, exposing your neck to his hungry mouth. "No one took me so good as you did."
"Mhm, fuck, best cunt you ever had?"
Simon grunted as he felt himself about to explode inside of you. "Best cunt I ever fucking had," he growled into your ear, kissing you all over your neck.
"Mhm, Si, please fill me up."
He smiled, his teeth bared in a devilish grin. "You want my baby in your belly?" he asked, his voice a low growl. For the first time, you betrayed yourself and nodded. You wanted his fucking baby and nothing more than it.
"I'm going to fuck a baby inside of you." Simon's thrusts became even more powerful, his hips slamming into yours as he felt himself reach the peak of pleasure. "You're going to be a Riley," he growled, feeling his cock twitch and throb inside you as he filled you with his seed.
As you both came together, Simon's seed mixed with your sweet nectar. He continued to push his cum over and over again into your cervix, lifting your legs, not allowing one drop to escape before he impregnated you.
After he turned soft, He pulled out of you and collapsed on the couch, panting heavily as he watched his thick, white cum drip from your pussy onto the fabric.
You couldn't stop laughing as you saw his cum dripping from your fucked-out core.
Simon grinned at you, his eyes glinting playfully. "You think that's funny?" He asked, reaching over to give you a light swat on the ass. "Just wait until we have to deal with a tiny little mini-me running around."
"Oh god, that will be hell." You laughed, but somehow you wanted this baby to be his. It was selfish; he had Johnny, and you were only a tool for him.
"You know you aren't a slut; I just thought you liked the degrading," he kissed you on your forehead and then down to your nose, to your plump lips.
"I loved it."
"You look sad for someone who had six orgasms."
"It's just that sometimes I feel like an incubator for all of you, not like a person." Small tears escaped your eyes, and you felt pathetic. You should have said this to Alex and not to Simon.
"Oh, baby girl, you aren't. The captain is smitten with you. Gaz is obsessed with every word you say. Alex made love to you. And Johnny and I look. I know we're a couple, but we are Poly, and we don't want to have just your baby. All Johnny talks about is the sweet angel who saved him. You are important, and I'm sorry if I made you feel that way." Your heart swells at his words.
"You made me feel amazing, Si."
"And I will continue, baby girl, and now on your belly, let me give you a massage. You deserve it after taking it like a champ."
#cod#cod mw2#cod x reader#cod mwii#tf 141#call of duty#tf 141 x reader#john price#smut#captain john price#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#ghost fanfiction#ghost#ghost cod#simon riley#john mactavish x reader#john soap mactavish#johnny#kyle gaz x reader#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#alex keller x reader
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Weird fucking thang. Posting these sketches just so i can talk about her. What if there was a guy who could be so insecure but so much better at hiding it.
Idfk whats going on with her outfit but its stuck on me so im keeping it.SHE'S WEARING STOCKINGS/leggings? BUT THEYRE WHITE SO IDK HOW TO VISUALIZE THAT. Hair is either a perm OR welcome side-effects from bleach + bright ass red hair dye (yes lizzie is ginger but she will dye her hair more red because. Clown.). Make up is exaggerated, lips and eyeshadoe overfilled, blush too bright/dark, literally everything besides actual greasepaint. Also she has funshaped suit cuffs button things..HONESTLY SHES HAVING A RLLY FUN TIME BEING DRAMATIC she goes to stock holder meetings dressed like this.
Elizabeth immediantly latches onto the Make ur Own Nice Fantasy and Friends thing :). She thinks this is a perfect idea. Like a LOT MORE INVOLVED version of movie william, sorta, i think she directly talks to the animatronics (esp. The funtimes)..but refuses to say their Real Names or talk about their old life in any way but sorta mean like "arent you glad you can be here now instead :3?"
The funtimes grow to FUCKING HATE HER. esp..because they are probably the ones she's "closest" to. And the ones she had the most hand in killing. (And they're also the ones that have been shown to revolt in canon.)
So eventually she gets too handsy or tests her luck somehow, with Baby(a couple of souls amalgamed into one robot, plus an AI), and, snatch, Lizzie is grabbed by her arm, pulled forward, and Baby clamps down on bone. Hard enough to chomp off (they made improvements to their strength.
If Lizzie hadn't had the knowledge of What They Do, and if she was younger and smaller, she'd be dead. She's not.
As soon as she's not dying from bloodloss and probably not from sepsis, she just goes ":o] okay i want a robot arm, daddy." And Bill is happy to oblige, mostly just scaling down blue prints from Baby's arm.
Elizabeth really enjoys giving handshakes with that arm. And using it to showcase all the wonderful potential Afton Robotics has. Fully artifulated and very strong :o].no dont worry about the phantom pains or how far the wires must go into your skin. Don't worry about how invasive or dangerous or the burns or how it Never Really Feels like I'm in control of it--Aren't you a fan of Progress, John? Don't stifle this. Imagine the profits
She clamps down harder on what's Proper Behavior for the funtimes. Many controlled shocks. I think she becomes a lot more cautious (but certainly she'll never be as much of a scaredy cat as Bill. She's above that.).
I think she's generally very insecure and shit. I think she's sort of feels "hollow" , no real self, similar to Bill. But i think she knows she's much better at hiding it, and knows how to be much more of a character. She's more solid. More grounded. She knows what she wants and By God she is going to get it.
I think she absolutely hates going to social events that are not 99% business. Elizabeth cannot exist in normal public life-- she's better than that (shes so so scared. She does not know how to act normal.).
What if a guy was extremely agoraphobic. I mean she's been hanging out in a fucking underground bunker for most of her life, besides school. That's where all the fun happens and where she can be in control.
She takes over Afton robotics, legally, as soon as William Afton goes missing. She Really takes over when "Dave Miller" goes missing, and when she snoops and finds his dead, "lifeless" body in the rabbit suit. She thinks this is a wonderful opprunity. She has so many ideas she needs to get out there, now that she's not stifled.
I think she takes this oppurtunity to Expand and seperate the brand from previous associations (leaches). Sues Henry Emily and his strand of the company. I dont know if she wins but that happens.
I think. I think. I'm going to make the Circus aniamtronics (the fucking funko pop shit) to be Lizzie's own little experiment at expanding the brand. I THINK SHE DOES SO WELL and takes the killing into her own hands esp now <3.
Aaaaaughhh idk i love lizzie so much. Thiss is rambly AND ALL SUBJECT TO CHANGE.
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The black man I think who told me ihop was too expensive and why I dont get a job.....i told him jobs are only for fellonies kids.....brown buffalo new york to his competition for mayor that her record of defamation of character is what his wealth supporters would involve themselves in doing to poverty ..punisher stalk them so none of these wokes may ask for any normal privilege
The green theory...if the family was felons the children have to go get fellonies....that cost of living is too mean and too not like we the people
We the people don't judge wealth groups peace and inaction directly to blame for punishers those jobs do
So the hope was to dismantle jobs and reinstitute go home and a gnp based off 9/11 community I only want skilled educated occasional teacher help not a lot of wallet grabbers that should be avoiding getting locked up
I did want to job under Obama but Obama was moral osama bin laden more then 9/11 was a horrifying abuser of his own poor Muslim populations and people who understand war as moral help
But if I wanted to job under Obama I wasn't forced too...people like Obama find me physically handicapped and stop battering people with slave driving idiots
I don't want to go out to eat unless I'm given my lesson....
The Spanish idea of the American revolution has caused a cost of living...would you want your er medic who is maybe moral they serve here so they don't seek education here completely and live elsewhere would you want them stressed out on that cost of living...some are moral they serve and don't take personal income
Most people live impoverished for health reasons they go to school here and they want to go to supportive cultures and their truly like nuns and monks and that creepy drunk rental job could have stressed out my anti sepsis and sanitation
I told him the people just walking by obtain things through woke Hollywood psychedelics companies.....all they do is go delusional and call you figments of their imagination
Their mean neglectful and rude because their really high all the time
I don't know how else to explain people who focus on saying nothing all the time they really focus on the most boring mean kid in high school characters and that's all they do
And that's its whole performance their really really high but can focus on saying meaningless nothing's
The woke virus is more interesting then that....but that's all they do they were child hood stars and they show off simple juvenile adjustments of pedophiles kids characters so the virus doesn't throw their thoughts into havoc mayhem and discord
Wab kinew is why I don't become a mafiaite about reliance and apathy on illegal labor....I think it is like east Germany if they ever in any way admitted their normal they go to genocide
Peace is the most insipid man it's here to research instead of accusations of browns international idea legislation of appropriate accountability
I want to go to housing.....and they are firm that they only want to shoot at me try to have me raped battered fucked with dikes at community meals so I don't much care about these populations history man wants to be the history man and none of it but a few pleas to me that it wants to extend its life
They could place full closures on it all and won't stop letting it all stalk around and I agree it's a dreadful Paris here and they live on top of each other and infested all around one another and you have to let them out sometimes
So there is no where for the homeless to go because early 60s revolution has to be implemented in deconstruction so they all decide that they need housing
They need their house pool for that party.....they need to stop blitz with deconstruction and go to housing
I also admitted to him as I view these people as unable to help themselves and I don't help people who don't disclose to me for publicity how they take care of themselves
I view them as people who do feel really guilty about what happened to poverty and go through their robotic specifications like sheep who can be led away later
The white influence largely treaties and symbiotes with a multicultural idea and if the multicultural idea does not ask me for taking care of I don't get involved in hegemony I'm not contracted to
I do need housing the southern Self idea here is nothing but a constant horror nightmare of incest wealth and yogi punishments......so I want to go to housing I don't want any southernism in my life ever again
She wanted to know the library hours so I said those people tried to kill me I don't completely know about you but I think it is little rules and if not those little rules they bother people
Their neo Nazis they will try to step on your head do all sorts of horrifying things
You have to blame the Methodist pastors next door it isn't Christianity itself the srimad bhagavatam writes about a narrow way to avoid these strange meaningless awful characters
The right wing claims they aren't responsible for illegal immigration and elie weisel....churches like it are directly involved in researching foreign jails to bring people here who want to mass murder us
The library comes from far away and that's how the security wanted to feel before it's executed....communist China probably will finally kill them but they asked for executionary privileges
The Methodist church next door directly trafficks dawn like characters from foreign jails....
David or aids I liked barak Obama I more ask for a meritocracy to stop extending life past normal activity
He asked me about breakfast at the compass station so i told him those are mentals help....the hopi prophecy....Canada does not feel mentals have a physicality.....those people are jail blind and they dont feed people their mentals help slave driving concentrators they just need their little fashion purses filled with drug money....they drug people to death thats all they do....
Its the war on drugs....they could do basic physical therapy like kitty hart moxom but there is no kill profit in doing the correct thing the states isn't by law profit motivated and those people always are creepy racists
They maybe do it because their also mentals they could be terrorists I don't really know but it looks like hygiene terrorism
Some of the women look starved enough to have survived.......clinical batteries......which is like severe non sensical verbal batteries jabberwocky or original sin jibberish and then really painful forced pills and bloodletting till they collapse and puke up food.....so some cannot do anything but what the drill sergeant says those the mentals they truly are disorganized catatonic paranoid schizophrenic.....they only know to follow job to stop introverted torture
So that's all they do is have to be a mental and you just tell them that's not actually how the job works and no and don't and they leave you alone if you don't hurt them the hygiene terrorists are scary rich kids with kill their high school needs to compensate their wealth scheming
History man gets to be the cleverest man the sociology so it's anything to make competition have to go to punishers through small mistakes in character instead of history man
USS kidd these huge arms for gunnery but small body their mentals to them to be caused strange invertebrate body parts to work to death in illegal labor not treat like someone and a human being
Zoos gonna go away and a ghastly lap to love too
I'm a rag doll and you can really light up around it and I just like salamander respond to stimuli
European union the Arab oil embargo created cultures around coal emissions....
Just km if that's more comfortable for you
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THOUGHTS HAVE TAKEN OVER AND WONT STOP!
Baby's asleep, partner is asleep. My brain is constantly showing me flash backs to when I was in hospital almost 4 months ago to give birth.
I close my eyes and all I see is the red sign above the curtain telling me I'm basically in a High Priority recovery room in the Recovery Ward. Why would I be here? What kind of infection have I suddenly got? Why can't I see my new baby?
After 3-4 days in this recovery ward, my partner overheard the words 'Sepsis, Septicemia and Septic Shock'. So does anyone wanna tell me what the fuck is going on?! He confronted the consultants and they confirmed I was being treated for Sepsis! I still had no clue what was going on, I thought I was in recovery from an emergency c section but it turns out not only was I recovering from a c section but also an infection that I never knew about. My baby was in ICU for 2 days because of clogged airwaves from the c section as well as being on antibiotics as a precaution for sepsis. I discovered this once I was handed the discharge letter. I broke down reading it. It contained words like 'resus, floppy, purple, not breathing'. I felt sick. We had to find that out from a fuckin letter!
INTUITION
It was almost like I knew something would happen. During pregnancy people would get so excited and I'd always say 'dont get excited until the baby is here as you just don't know what could happen'. Everyone thought I was being stupid...funny that.
IF YOU FEEL IT, DONT IGNORE IT as there's a reason why your feeling that way. Yes I'm sure I sound bonkers or like a paranoid mess and maybe I am🙆🏻♀️
Almost 4 months in and I still feel like a mess. I DO NOT want to look at photos from when we first met, me trying to breast feed and bond with you because I don't want to go back there. It wasn't me, doesn't look like me, she looks lost and it breaks my heart. One shouldn't have to go through that then be left to deal with it alone.
#mental heath support#mood diary#cyclothymia#mood disorders#mental health#low mood#documenting life#mum life#manic bipolar#feeling shitty#give my brain a break#sepsis#septicemia#newborn#illness#illness in hospital#recovery#my brain wont shut off#overactive thoughts
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idk fucking know.rant ig??? not big idk
but like i ibly rlly have 1 friend that im close to and thats ive opened up to about my austism and ocd like even a bit,,,,, and like my autism is fine or whatever and sure sometimes idk how to deal with people but its fine and we joke so its cool but my ocd is like,, a legit problem for me that I dont joke about but they will,,,, like sometimes i will casually mention it around them but they will joke abt it and like kool whatever,, ocd isnt happenong rn so idc ig
but like she was telling me how she went to a hincent van gogh exhibit abt his life and depression and how she cried at the 'ear'aser in the giftshop after, , and like its a hood point,,, people like to portray him cutting off his ear as like some cutesy joke or romantic gesrure and not like a seriours mental break down and self harm,,, which like cool she cares abt mental health and uknow the seriousness of it all
except when its roght in front of her??? like i messaged her when i wanted to pour boiling water on my foot to 'clean' it and half my brain was fully on board with it and the other half was like no that will make ot worse stop,,, so i messaged her as like idk a reaching out for some sort of help or distraction from my stupif fukcing brain,,, and she was just like,, no why would you do that? and was just argueing with me,, like thats not logical,,,, and I FUCKIING KNOW THAT WHY DO U THINK THERE ISNT BOILING WATER ON MY FOOT WHILE IM TEXTING U,,, and shes just like but why would u eevn think that,, like rememeber ur precious vincent van gogh and his fucking ear and my fuxking ocd,, and shes just like,, ohhh
and i talk to her when i was worried about getting sepsis from a small cut on my toe,, and shes just like no ur fine, uve not got sepsis obvi,, and like i brought it up again cuz its the only thing my brain would think of,, and she got annoyed that i kept bringing it up and now she fuxking jokes about me being obsessed with sepsis and that i just always think i have sepsis
like sorry my brain literally cant stop worrying abt this shit,, sorry i have phantom pains from my ocd that make me worry more and continue the fucking cycle
anyway today i was like ugh im gonna have a headache after yards,, could just feel one starting before it uknow,, and shes like just drink from the water fountain,, and i tell her i cant bcuz there was like a weird bottle on it and other debris around it and my ocd cant handle that,,, and she just tells me to drink from it and that its not an issue,, and when i was like ya no my ocd rmemeber she says shed drink some from it and then i could becuz were liek made from the same stuff so same body,,, and like how can i explain in a concise way that ya u can drink it fine but u r not me with stupid brain disease that doesnt care for logical conclusions and that no we dont have the same body were not even related and the fact i was vomiting for like an entire day not too long ago so my brain has been pretty weird abt it since,, and i cant so i instead say smth like,, no were not the same body and i was sick at christmas and i would still feel ill or throw up because my brain placebo would still fuck it up
she still pushes me to just drink from the fountain cuz its not a big issue but like to me it is,, another friend had a water bottle and offered me some amd that end the conversation so thank god they were there otherwise id have to argue my own thoughts to someone,,, do you srsly think i want my actions to b this illogical,, no i want to just live and be able to carry on without brain worms controlling what i can and cant do
but like its so frustrating to have to argue logic and reason with my own brain,, i dont want to have to have the same arguement with a friend that cant seem to understand how much it affects me because im not currently screaming crying and cutting my limbs off
and it sucks becuz shes like the only person i an talk to but she just doesnt understand and doesnt seem to care
my finger has a cut on it at the moment,, similar to my toe,, and its fucking with my brain,, only thing i can rlly think of,, but i cant talk to the one person i can talk to becuz its just an annoyance to her and i should just get iver it,,, not like i can feel other pain in parts of my body that my brain is relating to it and not like i had to convince myself that my gums were a normal colour (they were) and not blue black,,,, but i cant even just b like o ya my brain thinks im dying can u distracct me cuz shes just be weird about my mental health and bring it up later as a joke
but i dont rlly joke abt my ocd,, i make some nokes abt having it but not my actual symptoms and i feel weird eevn fully talking abt it in case someone find out, doesnt take it serious and doesn something on purpose to spite/upset me,, so for her to make jokes abt my symptoms without even showsing any sympathy while im going through them just fukcing sucks,,, and like ive not daid anything bcuz idk how to breatch that topic,,,,, ummm i think u dont care abt my mental health and it makes me not want to ever talk to u abt it but at the same time ur the only person i can talk to abt it and the jokes make me super uncomfy please inhenrently knpw what my brain needs thanks,, i just,, ik shell be like sorry im not good at reading ppl so i didnt realise cuz thats what she said abt the van gogh and me boiling water foot thing ,,,, like babes u know abt my asd and ocd and im currently telling u abt my distressing thoughts,,, thats not people skills im fucking telling u im going through it like RIGHT NOW and u just do not care
ok this rant was bigger than i thought,, oop
my arm aches now and i need to frind smth to ditract me from the urge to chop ny finger off 🙃🙃🙃
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I often seen critiques of make up from an existential/philosophical perspective, but I rarely see criticism of cosmetics from a stand point of the very physical bodily harm it does. I think this is because the number of dangerous ingredients is so massive, and overlapping its an absolutely daunting task. So I've compiled the information I've found and bear with me its a lot. (This is from an American perspective. Sorry, thats what I know. However I would love it if people from other countries had things to add.)
First I want to get the "simple" stuff out of the way. I think almost everyone has heard about bacteria and fungi in makeup and that makeup causes acne from clogging pores. Makeup has a pretty strict shelf life, yet consumers are entirely supposed to self-police as Ive never seen a single expiration date on any cosmetic packaging. (I guess consumers are meant to pull this knowledge out of the ether or something. I only found out about it in a tumblr PSA. I did read that expirys are on products in Europe.) Beauty blenders are the worst offender because theyre almost always moist. When I was taught makeup I was told to wet my sponge so it would soak up less product. If you apply makeup daily your sponge is likely constantly damp. USA Today had an article which said that 96% of sponges had fungi and over 60% had E. Coli in them. But I think what people talk about less is the complication of problems from using other products in conjunction with dirty beauty blenders. USA Today warns its especially dangerous to use beauty blenders if you have damage to your skin like acne, cuts, or dry skin. However the most popular beauty products for washing your face contain walnut pieces for literally scrubbing your skin and creating microabrasions. If youre a frequent makeup user you probably know about the cyclical nature of applying foundation, breaking out, and then applying more foundation to cover the breakout. You may even be using scrubbing cleansers more frequently to combat the acne creating more tears. This can lead to "blood poisoning" and, though neither USA today or Forbes mentions this, blood poisoning (not a medical term btw. Its sepsis.) according to numerous medical sites has the potential to be extremely lethal. The symptoms are so similar to a regular flu its nearly impossible to self-diagnose.
The very first thing I was told when a friend handed me a jar of finishing powder- popular with many beauty gurus for the "baking" technique and considered a must have- was a joke about "clown lung." This was a reference to the main ingredient talc. Talc causes lung problems including cancer and respiratory illness. If anyone remembers the large Johnson and Johnson lawsuit from 2019 it was because theyd been putting talc into baby powder. Talc is dangerous because it's impossible to mine and seperate from ASBESTOS. Some high-end finishing powders will try to sell you on safe talc-free formulas but all the products I looked into contained mica instead which causes pneumoconiosis, colloquially known as "black lung disease." Like fucking coal miners get. Its not just present in finishing powder either. In my research it turned out that talc/asbestos are also present in many eyeshadows and other powder products. [Googleable, evidenced in J&J lawsuit]
Another industry to examine is nail salons. Toluene, Formaldehyde, Dibutyl Phthalate, and Methacrylate compounds are all dangerous ingredients and present in various salon products. These ingredients cause a range of problems from dizziness, drowsiness, birth defects, slow fetal growth, future intellectual disabilities in the fetus, eye skin and throat irritation, coughing, allergic reactions, asthma-like attacks, short-term memory loss, nausea, dermatitis, cancer, and misscarriage. Some nail products advertise that they are 3-free meaning that toluene, formaldehyde, and DP should be absent but often the labels are found to be completely inaccurate. It should be noted that the risk is mainly to salon workers and not patrons but ask yourself if it is right to place other people at serious risk for your aesthetic. OSHA does make an attempt to mitigate these risks however not once in my years of makeup queen did I see a salon following these directives which include constant air monitoring, half mask respirators with chemical cartridges, gloves, long sleeves, and safety glasses. (And Im not even going to touch issues of human trafficking/slave labour out of nail salons one case of which occured 5 days ago two hours away from me) It should also be noted that formaldehyde can also be found in hair relaxers and hair dyes. [Found articles in Scientific American and NYT]
I also found on the FDAs website that many cosmetics include heavy metals like arsenic, mercury, and lead. (Usually accompainied by a picture of lipstick so I assume that is the product most likely to contain it, however campaign for safe cosmetics lists foundation as containing heavy metals, and The Guardian has an article about skin lighteners from Asia and Africa containing mercury.) The website stated that the amount of these heavy metals in cosmetics is "safe" if used as intended. (and I'm going to come back to the concept of "intended use" later because thats a can of worms too) However, when searching for info on heavy metal safety I found this quote in regards to metals in food:
"Certain metals, such as arsenic, lead and mercury, have no established health benefit, and have been shown to lead to illness, impairment, and in high doses, death. Understanding the risk that harmful metals pose in our food supply is complicated by the fact that no single food source accounts for most people’s exposure to metals in foods. People’s exposure comes from many different foods containing these metals. Combining all of the foods we eat, even low levels of harmful metals from individual food sources, can sometimes add up to a level of concern"
So like, which is it? Is it a "safe amount" or is no amount of metal safe? I understand that in the case of certain foods like fish some amount of mercury poisoning is always expected but fish is also something you feed yourself and nourish your body with while cosmetics are completely unecessary to your survival. The mercury problem in fish is also mitigated by health warnings when mercury levels are particularly high but cosmetics have no such warning. Another warning on the site indicated that children should ingest NO amount of lead AT ALL because it is particularly harmful for kids yet theres no effort to stop children from using lead-containing cosmetics. I worked next to a Five Below where I was shocked to find they sold Jeffree Star and Anastasia eyeshadow dupes for five dollars which amounts to fucking pocket change for a lot of kids and kids do buy that stuff. I also think its ironic the FDA would have anything to say regarding cosmetics because in the very same article about heavy metals in cosmetics the FDA says that they DO NOT REGULATE cosmetics beyond the color additives.
Mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, and brow tint often contain carbon black. This is a color additive that is an incomplete combustion of carbon-based products. It can cause lung disease, cancer, and organ system toxicity, and eye, nose, throat irritation. The effects are mainly studied in rats and those at biggest risk are industrial workers but why do other workers have to endure lung problems for something so unecessary? [Easily googleable, NIH, CDC, WHO Europe]
This next bit I only want to mention briefly because I didnt find any particularly reputable sources about it, but its a claim that cropped up repeatedly and I think its an interesting one. Parabens, estrogen, phthalates (again), and pesticides in cosmetics are apparently linked to endocrine disorders and hormone dysregulation. Im not entirely sure what is meant by this accusation. Endocrine disorders include female diseases like PCOS and possibly endometriosis. None of these diseases is very well studied and the female endocrine system itself is not well studied either. Im not saying "cosmetics cause PCOS" because we dont know if PCOS or these other endocrine/hormonal disorders are genetic or environmental or both (it appears that PCOS is largely genetic and Endometriosis is likely autoimmune related) AND we dont appear to know for sure that cosmetic ingredients cause endocrine disorder. But I include anyway for a number of reasons:
If you happen to struggle with hormonal problems you may want to know cosmetics is a potential environment factor.
These conditions are incredibly painful. It will be a battle getting your doctor to even acknowledge that pain for diagnosis. PCOS is linked to diabetes, and heart disease. [Thanks @mother-of-pearl ] There is no cure and the treatments are often throwing hormonal birth control at it and hoping for the best.
I dont anticipate the link between cosmetics and endocrine disorders being studied any time soon or any endocrine disorders studied at all because the medical/scientific field is sexist. I dont want women to suffer in the mean time.
Now again, take this with a grain of salt because I couldnt find scientific or news sources for it. Dont fucking come for me. Im not gonna respond to you. [Most reputable source was a paper from the library of medicine at the national institutes of health but it was behind a paywall and I dont have 39 dollars to be right on tumblrdotcom]
Avoiding these ingredients is not as simple as scanning the label for them. As many beautubers and the community are no doubt aware considering multiple scandals over veganism. Products advertised as vegan or cruelty free but contain non-vegan carmine or are sold in China which legally requires the products to be animal tested. Cosmetic companies will hide ingredients claiming they are "trade secrets" or they will be placed under "fragrance." Many ingredients will be known by six or seven different names and asking consumers to be aware of seven different names for multiple ingredients requires consumers to be aware of innumerable different, often complicated ingredient names. I shouldnt have to point out that's a ridiculous burden to place on women. The EU banned 1,300 hazardous ingredients that the US did not. Cosmetic companies rely on women being unwilling/unable to bring in a list of 1,300 ingredients- with multiple names- every time they pop in to the drug store, sephora, or wherever. Buying "natural" products will not help you either. Theres no established criteria for natural/organic in costmetics, the FDA doesnt test these products, and "natural"=/= safe anyway. Plenty of plants and minerals are poisonous. One good example is traditional kohl products which advertise their natural status but also naturally contain lead and reiterating that natural powders contain mica. US courts are rarely on the side of consumers either. I found an interesting lawsuit against St. Ives for their apricot scrub taken to court for their "dermatologist tested" label despite it causing breakouts and cuts to the skin. The courts ruled that this label was fine because it only indicated that the product was TESTED not APPROVED by dermatologists. However I think any rational consumer would look at this label and assume the tests concluded it was safe for use or else why put the label on there?
[Googlable XMONDO drama, googlable laws wrt china and eu, already stated about FDA, FDA website about Kohl. Googled St. Ives lawsuit.]
I want to return to the idea of "intended use." This is sort of a fucky concept a lot of companies have ways of getting around. My "last straw" with makeup had to do with a run-in I had with Anastasia over their "Riviera" eyeshadow palette. In this pallette they had two colors that were the real feature of the palette, an electric neon purple and a radioactive pink I mean every photo, every promotion has these two colors swirled together around the eye. Because again, its an eyeshadow palette. When I buy the eyeshadow palette of course there's a little insert warning in the package that says these two shades are not intended on the eye area. In an eyeshadow palette. Contacting their customer service they told me that these two shades were meant to be used as a blush. neon purple blush. Not only that, but their website and instagram featured NO models wearing the shades as blush while EVERY model one or more of the shades as eyeshadow. When asked about this discrepancy ABH stopped responding. What I find egregious about this is the amount of people who dont know, and then more staggeringly; dont care. The sephora clerks didnt know, the in store abh representative didnt know, their customers didnt know, and when I told them they would respond with "oh, [brand] did the same thing with their [shade]." Sure enough, when I demanded that store clerks open the packaging to look for warnings nearly every product had an "eyeshadow" that was not intended for use on the eyes. Relegating dark, red-toned teal to "contour" and neon grean to "highlighter" US-based cosmetic junkies will say that these pigments have been approved for use by the EU however I found absolutely NO evidence of that. I googled it a thousand ways but all I ever found were blog posts, reddit comments, and one quote from an apparently nonEuropean layman in an Insider article. I even changed my location to France on ABH's website and the Norvina palette still contains the same warnings (not to harp on ABH in particular. I just know which shades in particular are the problem there). The Insider article noted that brands who were selling pressed pigments declined to comment. If the pressed pigments were EU friendly, I would think companies would be clamouring to say so. It also still makes their market as eyeshadow colors illegal in the US. (If any Europeans would like to chime in I'd love that.) Another problem I find with cosmetics companies and their reps is the claim that the worst thing that could happen is eye irritation for those with sensitive eyes and staining. How could they possibly know? The FDA doesnt test, or approve these cosmetics in the eye area, so ostensibly no one should be using it that way.
The next one is a bit of a "duh" but I'm going to talk about it anyway. Counterfeit cosmetics are a booming market full of untold dangers. Untold primarily because these products could contain literally anything. Ive read about glue, arsenic, lead, feces, staph, and horse urine to name a few. The labels and ingredient list on these products are fake. Legitimate brands often unintentionally play into the counterfeit market. They create artificial scarcity by making less of the product than is actually needed for consumer demand to create an even higher demand. If consumers miss out often their only chance at getting the product is to turn to counterfeits. I found examples of women who had their lips superglued, lips "turned to goo" and burned to blistering, throat closures, women with stys, contact dermatitis, eye infections. I think we as a society turn a blind eye to this problem because we think "hey, if youre buying counterfeits for a discount and you get hurt you deserve it." We imagine idiots buying products for 4 dollars from ebay or perusing Canal street for FEИTY beauty. But these counterfeits can be really convincing. I myself received a gift of a huda palette that I only recognized something was weird about it because I'd swatched it at sephora about five times earlier that month. The person who bought it for me actually paid MORE than the usual cost for the palette because it was advertised as a newer, better edition. The websites can be disturbingly similar. For instance Kylie Jenner's legitimate website is KylieCosmetics.com but you can find fakes at kyliecosmeticsshop.co.uk. These fakes can buy ad space and be one of the first sites that populate when you google the products instead of typing the legitimate site into the address bar. Counterfeits can also be bought and sold through third parties on websites like ebay, wish, and amazon. (My gift actually came from Amazon.)
[Netflix doc "Broken" ep "Makeup Mayhem" Corroborated by personal experience and google]
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Cardiac Arrest
Inspiration: Open Heart from Choices
Pairing: MC x Bryce but also some jealous angst from Ethan
Description: A one shot after Chapter 10. The Open Heart MC (Lottie) has returned to Edenbrook after visiting Miami with Ethan Ramsey.
Author Note: In this version, MC is romancing Bryce and, although she respects and likes Ethan, she is beginning to realise that he is a bit of a dick! Sorry Ethan stans!
Lottie
My eyes opened lazily and I smiled at being back in my own room again. The trip to Miami was fun... well, it was good but I'm not sure if fun is the right word.
It definitely wasn't as awkward as I'd imagined. I'd envisioned uncomfortable silences with Dr Ramsey, or even worse - him criticising everything I did. I expected "Keep your voice down Rookie. This isn't spring break," or "Rookie, are you really going to wear that? It's rather short."
But, for the most part, it was actually nice getting to know Ethan a little. We definitely had a few moments where I noticed him looking at my legs, or he leaned too far in as he whispered to me.
However, it was all harmless flirtation; a few silly moments on a little vacation away in sunny Miami. What happens in Miami... I shake my head and laugh. Nothing happened! Although I had a strange feeling Ethan wanted it to.
But none of that mattered. I was eager to get up and ready, and head off to work. Mostly because I love my job but a part of me also really missed Bryce. He'd texted me a cute message while I was away, hoping I was having a good time. It had made me smile after a long day. I'm not sure what we have, but whatever it is is fun and exciting. I need his positivity in my life.
It was mid-morning before I saw the cheeky surgeon. He sidled up to me as I was checking a patient's biopsy report at the nurses' station.
"Hey there, Dr Bedford," he winked, leaning on the desk. "Long time no see."
I grinned at his easy nature and cocksure smirk.
"Hey there yourself, Dr Lahela. Have you missed me?" I joked.
"Yes," he said, holding my gaze. I blushed. I didn't expect such a straight answer. A joke or flirtatious comment, sure. "Did you, ah... did you miss anyone at all?" He flipped his hair in a supposedly nonchalant way.
I laughed.
"Well, I did miss Regina," I nodded toward the friendly nurse who was trying not to look like she was listening to us, but she smiled at that comment. Bryce's face fell for a fraction of a second and I couldn't bear to do this to him.
"Of course i missed you," I admitted and he grinned widely. I swatted his arm with my file. "Happy?"
"Extremely," he winked and went to walk off. "Although I wasnt worried. How could you not miss this?" He stretched his arms out wide and shrugged.
"Watch it!"
Bryce walked backwards into another doctor.
"Hey man, I'm sor-"
"Just watch where you're walking." It was Ethan. I mean... Dr Ramsey. "Rookie, my office, now."
I shot Bryce an apologetic glance, but he looked a bit pissed off. Ramsey guided me towards the elevator.
As the doors closed and the lift began to move, he cleared his throat.
"I dont know how you put up with him."
I turned, stunned into confused silence for a moment.
"What?"
"The surgical intern. Hes too full of himself."
"Well... hes just confident. He's a good guy." I swallowed, hard. I was not happy with him putting Bryce down and wished to hell the conversation would be over. "What did you want me for, anyway?"
The elevator dinged for the 5th floor and he strode out towards his office. Flustered, I almost had to jog to keep up with him.
"Sit," he commanded as he closed the door behind me. Well, I for one knew who I thought was the most annoying one around here and it wasnt Bryce. Huffing internally, I sat anyway.
Ethan leaned against his desk with his back to me. He gazed out of the window and stroked his face, his fingers rubbing his stubbled cheeks thoughtfully.
"In Miami," he began, turning to face me slightly, "we were... unprofessional."
I waited for him to continue. I was intrigued where this was heading as I didn't recall any unprofessionalism.
He sighed, and I noticed that he hadn't looked directly at me once.
"That surgeon, is he..." he turned back to the window. "Are you and he...?"
My mind reeling, I shook my head, even though he couldnt see.
"Dr Ramsey, you're confusing me. When were we anything but professional? And what has Bryce got to do with anything?"
He suddenly perked up slightly, and looked me deeply in the eyes.
"Bryce? Is that his name, the surgeon?"
"Do you ever answer anyone else's questions?" I stood up, irritated by his deflections, but also not wanting to risk my job by staying here any longer. I was ready to yell at my boss. "I better leave."
"Wait, Rookie-"
I span around, and couldnt keep the anger out of my voice.
"My name is Lottie! Not Rookie! If anyone is being unprofessional here, it is not me!"
I slammed the door on my way out.
Bryce
It had been three days since I'd seen her. Trying to not be that guy, I'd only texted her once while she was in Miami, but I'd sneakily done it at 10pm on the first night to test if she was with him or not. She'd answered pretty much straight away, putting my mind at rest. Not that I thought she was the type to just... it was more... him. Dr Ramsey. And I know she liked him. I'm not sure if it was a sexual thing but she definitely looked up to him and with puppy dog eyes, no less. I just imagined that sleezeball.. inviting her there because he knew she'd be impressed and then flattering her and showing off and then trying to... ugh. I couldnt think about it.
It was 10.30am when I finally got out of surgery and saw her standing in front of the nurses' station, looking at a file, her forehead furrowed as she chewed absentmindedly on a pen. Part of me wanted to kiss that furrow away and part of me wanted to be that pen. I sneaked up to her as quietly as possible and turned the Lahela charm up to 10.
"Hey there, Dr Bedford. Long time no see."
She grinned as she looked up at me, and my insides felt all warm and fuzzy. This chick was doing things to me, man.
"Hey there yourself, Dr Lahela," she smiled. "Have you missed me?"
"Yes." I wanted to be honest with her. Joking's cool and fun, but I needed her to know that I did miss her. I just hoped she felt the same. I knew I could be... overbearing sometimes, and some people can't handle my confidence, but I felt something from Lottie. I knew she liked me as much as I liked her and the little blush that crept across her cheeks confirmed it. But there was no harm in checking. "Did you miss anyone at all?" I said, nonchalantly as if I wasnt really interested in the answer.
"Well, I did miss Regina," she bit her lip and looked at the nurse who was busy working. I tried not to look too bothered but then she grinned and said, "Of course i missed you." That was all I wanted to hear. She smacked my arm. "Happy?"
"Extremely." I grinned, and began to leave: now I had her confession that she couldn’t live without me - well, not exactly, but it was only a matter of time. I held out my arms as I backed away. "Although I wasn’t worried. How could you not miss this?"
"Watch it!"
I felt someone ram into me, hard.
"Hey man, I'm sor-"
"Just watch where you're walking." Fuck's sake. It was him. Ramsey. The only person who could sour my mood. "Rookie, my office, now."
I looked at Lottie. How could she let him talk to her like that? A small part of me expected her to stand up for herself bit of course, she didn't. She's a teacher's pet and she pretty much loves him. What a dick.
I watched as he gently pressed a hand against her lower back and walked her to the elevator. Talks to her like shit and he still gets to touch her. Shit is fucked up, man.
I counted to 10 under my breath as I headed to the canteen.
Ethan
My eyes flickered open and I sighed. I had fallen asleep in my office on the couch again. I rubbed a hand across my face and checked the time. 5am.
I'd spent most of yesterday evening, as soon as we'd got back to Edenbrook, researching a possibly cure for sepsis that Nash had given me. Today I was going to begin trying it out on Naveen.
After getting showered and selecting a clean suit from the wardrobe in my office - I had long since accepted that I would spend most nights here - I got to work on the new cocktail of drugs. I didn't expect results for a while so went on a walk around the wards to check on some patients.
As I walked down one corridor, I heard a familiar voice. Lottie. I took a deep breath, I'd been unprofessional in Miami by drinking with Lottie, getting close to her and, on one occassion which should never be repeated, I moved in for a kiss which she did not respond to and instead she gave me a good night hug.
"Of course I missed you..."
Who was she talking to? I got closer to the corner to listen in
Then I heard that cocky surgical intern's voice as he headed towards me.
"Although I wasnt worried. How could you not miss this?"
I stepped around the corner at the same time as he walked backwards into me. I hoped it hurt. He span around quickly as I barked a gruff warning.
"Hey man, I'm sor-"
Man? I'm not his man.
"Just watch where you're walking." I had no time for this idiot. I walked straight up to Lottie. "Rookie, my office, now."
It probably came out ruder than I intended but my goal was to get her away from him. That, and I think we needed to talk before she blabbed about our - admittedly, my - unprofessional behaviour.
I knew the surgeon was still watching us so I made sure to place my hand on Lottie's back.
A subtle 'beware' which, even as I did it, I regretted. It was this kind of behaviour that had me worrying all morning. It was obvious to me that I felt more for this intern than I should, but I really shouldn't be making it obvious to anyone who could see. It was just that surgeon... he riled me. How could you not miss this? Ugh. Such a cocky bastard. Maybe I needed to have a word with Dr Tavener about him.
"I dont know how you put up with him." I blurted out as soon as we were safely behind the elevator doors. Another thing to regret. I was creating a long list of these incidents since I'd met her.
She looked at me with a hint of annoyance in her eyes.
"What?"
"The surgical intern. Hes too full of himself." Couldnt she see it?
"Well... hes just confident. He's a good guy."
I paused, thinking about how I could warn Rookie about over confident pricks without being too personal, but she saved me from another regrettable comment by asking "What did you want me for, anyway?"
The elevator reached my floor and I walked quickly towards my office. Another save. I didn't know how to answer her question. There were so many things I wanted to know from her. Did she really not want to kiss me? And why? I shook my head at the thought. It couldn't have happened anyway. I was her boss! Maybe that was the reason, that was why she didn't kiss me.
I didn't look at her as she entered, I just closed the door behind her and asked her to sit.
I looked out of the window at the city that sprawled below us.
"In Miami," I turned to her but could only look at her knees, covered with the blue scrubs, "we were... unprofessional."
She didn't respond, but I guess it wasn't a question. But still, why does she make this so hard? I needed to ask the question that had been burning inside me ever since I saw them last week outside the supply closet, giggling and leaning into each other.
"That surgeon, is he..." I had to turn away so she couldnt see the blush. "Are you and he...?"
"Dr Ramsey, you're confusing me. When were we anything but professional?" I could sense the rising panic in her voice. "And what has Bryce got to do with anything?"
Bryce. So that was his name. I had heard of him; the superstar surgical intern who was flying solo already. So that's what he had to offer. That's what piqued her interest.
"Bryce? Is that his name, the surgeon?" Now I had a name, I could definitely speak to Tavener.
Her face clouded over and she flung herself out of the chair.
"Do you ever answer anyone else's questions?" She seethed, opening the door. "I better leave."
No! We hadn't discussed anything, my mind was an absolute mess.
"Wait, Rookie-"
She turned back to me, anger evident on her face. I'd never seen her so annoyed.
"My name is Lottie!" She growled. "Not Rookie! If anyone is being unprofessional here, it is not me!"
She slammed the door, hard, and left me, open mouthed, on the edge of the desk. The realisation dawned on me. She was absolutely right. It was all me. It was all my fault.
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if you have time/dont mind could you do #3 or 7 for gratsu? love your stories!
Sorry for this taking so long! I decided to go with #7, and this is set in the “richer and cleverer than everyone else” thieves’ guild au - between “one third bad intentions, one third avarice, and one-eighth sawdust” and “ten pints of crazy in a one-pint glass.”
Enjoy!
Summary: Gray’s been in love with Natsu for a long time, and Natsu’s bad at feelings.
Rating: Teen and Up AudiencesPairings: Natsu/Gray, Sting/RogueTags: Thieves’ Guild AU, Drinking, Love Confessions, Kissing, Cuddles
Natsu was already face-first in the alley behind the alehouse before he realized he’d probably had a bit too much to drink.
“Having a little trouble there?”
Gray’s voice came from somewhere above Natsu, and Natsu attempted to tell him to fuck off. Instead, he made an unintelligible noise that sounded a bit like ffffgggnnnf and ended up with a mouth full of mud.
“You’re a complete twat, you know that, right?” Gray sighed, crouching down next to Natsu, whose shirt was already soaked through with foul-smelling ditch water. “You’re lucky I’m here to save you from yourself.”
Natsu groaned as Gray hauled him to his feet, wrapping Natsu’s arm around his shoulder and guiding him none-too-gently out of the alley. Natsu squinted – the alchemical street lamps were blurs of white light above them, and he could just make out the shapes of carriages on the street.
“You smell like piss,” Gray grumbled, setting Natsu down on a bench near one of the streetlamps. He crouched down in front of Natsu, frowning at the wet, red stain on the arm of his shirt.
“Is that blood?” he asked, looking up at Natsu, who blinked at him.
“No?”
Gray sighed, reaching up and unbuttoning Natsu’s shirt. “That’s not a question you’re supposed to answer with another question,” he said, wincing when he saw the cut across Natsu’s bicep. “What the hell happened?”
Continue reading on AO3
“I… may have been… uh, sort of… stabbed,” Natsu said, looking down at the cut and staring at it with a furrowed brow.
“How in the nine hells did you…” Gray sighed, pulling his bag around to the front and digging through it for a linen bandage. “You’re going to get sepsis after that alley water.” He tied the bandage quickly around Natsu’s arm, looking somewhat satisfied when Natsu grunted in pain.
“Look, I… there was…”
“Oh, shut up,” Gray said, running his hands over his face. “You’re completely cocked, what the hell were you thinking?”
Natsu frowned, looking down at his hands and trying to remember why it was he’d been drinking so much. There had been a woman, and a story, and something about a—
“Treasure!” Natsu exclaimed, reaching out for Gray. Gray pushed his hand away, making a face.
“We’re in a shit town in the middle of fuck-arse nowhere,” Gray said, rolling his eyes, “and you’re getting bit by the tavern bitch at some drinkery while we’re trying to figure out where to start over. There’s no treasure here.”
“There’s you,” Natsu said, voice suddenly softening as he leaned in and touched Gray’s cheek. A pink flush crept across Gray’s face and he ducked his head, staring at the ground.
Natsu stared at him, running his thumb over Gray’s cheekbone. He’d been so stupid for so long, and it scared him now, how deep he’d fallen. Gray’s eyes were like oceans – deep and dark and terrifying.
“You’re tipped,” Gray said quietly.
“Mm. A bit,” Natsu admitted. “But you’re still my favorite thing.”
Gray leaned forward and touched his forehead to Natsu’s. “Wish you’d talk like this when you’re sound,” he said. Natsu sighed and ran his fingers through Gray’s hair.
“Sorry,” he said, and Gray blinked in surprise. “’m not good at… this.”
“No, you’re not,” Gray said, a small smile creeping across his face.
“Hey, that’s…” Natsu squinted at Gray, looking slightly put-out. “That’s… it’s not very nice to say it. To your…”
“To my what?” Gray asked. He looked almost afraid, and Natsu made a frustrated sound.
“Your… person.”
“Person.” Gray raised an eyebrow at Natsu. “Wonderful. Good to know we’ve got such a strong bond.”
“That’s not… not what I meant,” Natsu insisted, rubbing his face. The cool wind was starting to help clear his head, but everything was still a bit fuzzy. “Like a… person I kiss.”
A look flashed across Gray’s face that confused Natsu, and Gray pulled back a tiny bit – just enough for Natsu to notice, but not enough to dislodge Natsu’s fingers from his hair.
“Person you kiss, huh?” Gray’s voice was quiet and tinged with uncertainty.
A frustrating confusion settled in Natsu’s chest as he gazed at Gray, trying to figure out what he’d said that wasn’t quite right. There had been plenty of kissing since they’d fled Magnolia two months ago, and Natsu couldn’t get enough of it. The feel of Gray’s lips, the way they pressed together, the taste of him against Natsu’s tongue…
Natsu felt dizzy just thinking about it.
Gray shook his head, pressing his cheek into Natsu’s hand and then standing and looking down the street. A couple was approaching, and as they passed through the street lamps, Natsu recognized Sting and Rogue.
“He’s completely soused,” Gray said, rubbing his temples. Sting crouched down in front of Natsu, shaking his head and patting Natsu’s cheek.
“You’re a complete arsehole, you know that, right?” Sting’s voice was gentle, but Natsu could sense genuine disappointment behind his words.
“I’m… sorry?” Natsu said, looking up at Gray. Rogue had a hand on his shoulder, and Natsu was dismayed to see that Gray’s face was drawn and his eyes were wet and downcast. “I don‘t know… what did I do?”
Sting sighed, putting an arm under Natsu’s shoulders and helping him to his feet.
“Let’s get you straightened out,” he said, starting off down the street toward their rooming house. “You two can work it out in the morning.”
~*~*~
When Natsu woke up the next morning, he was surprised to find that his head didn’t hurt.
“Sting gave you something from the alchemist.”
Natsu rolled over to see Gray sitting next to him on the edge of the bed. His eyes were sad, and Natsu frowned as he pushed himself up against the pile of pillows lining the headboard of the bed.
“Wanna tell me what in Mavis’ name you were thinking?” Gray asked.
Natsu rubbed his face, looking around the room. It was mid-morning, and a soft light was streaming through the open window behind Gray. There was a tray at the end of the bed with wine and fresh pears and almond rolls.
“I didn’t mean to get soused,” Natsu said, reaching out and grabbing one of the rolls. It was still warm, and he sighed happily as he chewed it. “Or stabbed. There was a woman there, ship’s captain from Hargeon – the port town, remember?” Gray nodded. “She was a bit tipped and started telling stories about a vault. Supposed to be uncrackable.”
Gray perked up a bit at that, but his gaze on Natsu was still wary.
“So I bought a few rounds for the crew and got her talking, and I got… carried away. And then she, uh… well, I said something that set her off, and she stuck me with her blade and tossed me out the door on my face.” Natsu looked sheepish.
Gray sighed, shifting onto the bed and crossing his legs under him. He looked tired, and Natsu’s chest ached in a way it never had before.
“I’m sorry,” he said, reaching out for Gray’s hand. “I didn’t mean for you to worry.”
Gray shook his head. “’s not that,” he said after a moment. “I don’t… I’m…” He licked his lips, pulling his hand away from Natsu and rubbing his face. “I’ve been… stuck on you for a long time. And you…”
He sighed, words catching in his throat as he looked away from Natsu. The morning sun threw a halo of light around his head and Natsu couldn’t help but stare. Gray looked beautiful, but his eyes were sad, and it felt like a wound in Natsu’s heart. When Gray hurt, Natsu hurt.
The realization hit Natsu like a club to the back of the head, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe.
“Oh,” he said softly. Gray wiped at his face, cheeks pink, and Natsu reached out again, working his fingers between Gray’s and pulling him close. “Helya’s tits, I’m an ass,” Natsu murmured, pressing his cheek to Gray’s head.
Gray took a shaky breath, wrapping his arms around his legs and leaning against Natsu.
“I… ‘your person,’ that was stupid, I’m…” Natsu ran his thumb over the back of Gray’s hand. “You’re so much more than that.”
Gray looked uncertainly up at Natsu, and Natsu cupped his cheek, kissing him gently.
“I’m… stupid with feelings,” Natsu whispered. “I don’t… I don’t want to lose you.” He swallowed, feeling his own tears start to appear. “You and Erza and Sting and Rogue—you’re all I have left. And that’s…”
“Terrifying?” Gray said. Natsu nodded and Gray elbowed him, not harshly but enough to make Natsu grumble in discomfort. “You think you’re the only one who’s scared of losing this? Us? All of us, not just you, but you’re…”
Natsu ran a hand over his face, pulling Gray tighter against him and whispering, “I’m sorry, I didn’t th—”
“I’ve lost everyone but this family,” Gray said, voice breaking. “Everyone, all of them, they’re all—and I’m scared to lose you, but not enough to pretend that I don’t lo—” He stopped himself mid-sentence and sighed, pressing his forehead to his knees.
Natsu was silent for a moment, sorting through the tumult of feelings in his chest. It wasn’t just the kissing, he knew that. But saying it out loud…
“You’re my best friend,” he said softly, pressing his cheek to Gray’s hair. “My partner, the one who pulls me back when I’m too far gone… gods, I trust you more than anyone in this life.”
Nastu’s chest felt tight. He hated saying these things, hated admitting it out loud because if it was out there, it might disappear. If he kept it inside, it would be safe, because nobody would know how much he cared, and the gods wouldn’t take Gray away from him.
“You’re the best adventure I’ve ever had,” Natsu said softly. It didn’t matter that he was scared. Gray needed to hear it. “You make everything worth it, and…”
Gray was crying now, shoulders shaking as he tried to hold it in. Natsu shifted until Gray was between his legs, head resting on Natsu’s chest. This was so much more important than all the treasure in the world.
In a voice just soft enough for Gray to hear it, Natsu whispered, “I love you.”
Gray relaxed against Natsu, turning on his side and curling up so his head was tucked in the crook of Natsu’s neck.
“You mean it?” he asked, fingers running up and down Natsu’s arm and tracing the edge of the bandage.
“Thieves’ honor,” Natsu said, running his fingers through Gray’s hair. “I swear on my mother.”
Gray snorted. “You don’t even know who your mother is.”
“Fair point,” Natsu said, grinning. “Then I swear on all twelve gods and the Nameless Thirteenth.”
A small smile crossed Gray’s face as he looked up at Natsu and whispered, “I love you, too,” then kissed him.
Natsu pulled Gray closer, breathing him in and tightening his fingers in Gray’s hair. Gods, Gray felt good. The taste of sweetwine still clung to his lips, and Natsu drank him in eagerly, pressing Gray down against the pillows as he shifted, straddling Gray’s legs.
“You’re mine,” Natsu murmured, running his hands up Gray’s arms and pinning his wrists to the bed. “You make me feel so much.”
“Thought feelings were a diversion from the game,” Gray teased, but Natsu could still feel a hint of vulnerability behind the words. He leaned back, gazing down into Gray’s dark eyes.
“Well, you are pretty hard to look away from,” Natsu said, enjoying the pink flush that crept up Gray’s cheeks. He wanted to kiss it – kiss Gray everywhere, all the parts of him that Natsu knew by heart, and the pieces he hadn’t learned yet. “But you’re my favorite distraction.”
#fairy#ftlgbtales#ftlgbtfics#gratsu#gray fullbuster#natsu dragneel#gray x natsu#thieves' guild#thieves au#fluff#kissing#cuddling#ask#prompt#anon#my fic
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Whumptober day 3
@whumptober2019
Sorry if this sucks
In the car, Jet was panting in the back seat. He groaned softly, pressing a hand into his side.
"You good?" Blake asked him. They'd just finished one of the last pieces of their assignment and were driving back to the hotel.
"Yeah, I just pushed it a little" Jet lied
"Right. Slow down next time."
"Got it, dad" Jet sassed. "You're the boss, after all"
"Shut it brat. I'm trying to look out for you" Blake snapped, keeping his attention on the road. "You didn't get hurt?"
"No." Jet lied again. He couldn't let Blake know that he was hurt.
Their alarm woke Jet, earning a groan from him. His wound stung and he hissed.
"Good morning vampire. Careful, the blinds are open" Blake said.
Jet just growled at him.
"I'm showering now. Feel free to masturbate or whatever I'll be a few minutes." Blake said, heading out of the room.
Jet was glad for it. When Blake left, Jet pulled his shirt up, revealing crudely wrapped bandages. They felt damp, as if he was sweating.
He unwrapped them and peered at the wound underneath. It was red and inflamed, obviously getting infected. He stood and searched the room for anything to clean it with, but found nothing. He continued to search, but before he finished, he heard the shower turn off.
"Shit." He muttered. He decided to clean it when he took his shower.
The next day when Jet woke, it wasn't just stinging. It burned. He sat up and was hit by a dizzy spell. He felt weak and sweaty and he knew what was going on. He had to clean the cut. It was only getting worse.
He stood up and was immediately hit by a wave of nausea. His head spun and he dropped to the floor.
Blake was at his side immediately, helping him back into bed. Jet tried to push him away, insisting he was fine, that it would pass.
"Like hell it will. What the fuck is going on?" Blake asked.
"Nothn's goin on" Jet tried to tell him.
Blake pulled his shirt up a bit, revealing the bandages wrapped around his lower abdomen.
"Yes, absolutely nothing." Blake said flatly, pulling the bandages off. It only took one look for him to draw the conclusion. "This is infected. You're probably developing sepsis. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want..." Jet began
"Didn't want to?"
"Didn't want help"
Blake paused. His voice was more gentle when he spoke again "You need it, J. I'll grab the first aid kit. Don't try to get up again."
Jet leaned back against the headboard, feeling like shit. He was scared of what Blake was going to do, but he was tired and he had to admit that he did need medical attention.
Blake came back only a minute later "Alright, it'll be easier for me if you come into the bathroom." Blake walked over to Jet who was starting to stand up.
Blake supported him, helping him walk. Jet's gut twisted at needing that help.
"Can you get up onto the counter?"
"No"
"Okay sit there then."
Jet sat on the toilet lid, twisting to lean against the wall. The light shining on him was making his nausea worse. He just wanted to sleep.
Blake was holding a bandage and a bottle of antiseptic when he turned back to Jet. "This'll hurt. Do you want to do it yourself?"
"I don't want it" Jet protested
"You'll die."
"I don't care"
Blake sighed. They both knew full well that Blake was going to do it anyways. Blake kneeled in front of the taller, pulling his shirt back up to expose the wound.
"I'm sorry J" he said. He poured the antiseptic onto the bandage and set down the bottle. He then pressed it into the wound.
Jet stifled his cry, kicking out as Blake dabbed at the wound with the bandage.
"You don't have to be quiet"
Jet shook his head, tears pooling in his eyes.
"I know it hurts" Blake persuaded, pausing from cleaning the wound.
"Nnn"
"J?"
Blake sighed. When he tried to go back to cleaning it, Jet reacted.
His foot connected with Blake's chest, knocking him back. Jet had fallen to the floor and was trying to press himself into the wall as Blake recovered.
When blake looked at the boy, he saw that his eyes were glazed over, not registering exactly what was going on. His breaths were panicked and he looked like he was trying to shrink into himself.
"Jet, it's me, Blake… do… you know where you are?"
Jet didn't respond. Blake crept closer, watching every movement the larger boy made.
"J?"
Blake had to repeat his name a few times before he got a reaction. Jet looked him in the eye.
"Do you know where you are?" Blake repeated
"H-home?" Jet asked
"No, we're at a hotel in Glasgow." He continued, "You have an infected wound. I was cleaning it, remember?"
Jet nodded.
"I'm gonna help you back up okay?" Blake stood to help the boy
"No! No, please" Jet panicked "You- I'm- it's okay, I don't- please dont"
"J, what's wrong?"
"Nothing! " Jet cried, panicking.
Blake decided that it might be best to wait this out. "Do you want some water?"
"Okay…" Jet agreed timidly
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