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ganondoodle · 22 days

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made it to lvl 100 of the skull caverns for the first time ever in stardew (i made it once before i think but collapsed in that very room bc of the time limit back in the day lol)

severly disappointed with the reward, Qi congratulated me for doing it without crafting staircases likE REaL mEn talking about my farmer and him like they are both so above and beyond 'normal' people-

....................i did craft staircases....................

#ganondoodles talks #apparently its enough to stop using them right before you enter #that was pure coincidence #HOWEVER i used only a few to get away from lots of monsters lol #the new late game additions did make it a little better to deal with #also i cannot stand Qis ass #whats his problem #stop giving me stupid quests like that i just wanna decorate my farm #but my drive to get the items he sells for those dumb gems you only get by doing his dumb quests is too strong #WHY do they start on the first day of the week though #'do this in seven days- time left 1 day'#you need to understand i hate time limits of any kind #it forces me into a frenzy of trying to be as fast as possible to get most of the day #and thus leads to me speedrunning everything instead of enjoying it #also i hate the way he talks #a mutual said he talks like some big ceo to which everything is a game especially and only him and your farmer are exceptional beings #and its like #now that i finally heard that talk #yeah- yeha he does sound like that

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musical-chick-13 · 8 months

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"but there just AREN'T any well-written women in aNyTHiNg I interact with"

DO TEN MINUTES OF RESEARCH.

WATCH BETTER SHOWS. READ BETTER BOOKS.

THERE IS A VERY SIMPLE SOLUTION HERE.

#love when a post is a free blocklist #jesus fucking christ #mel screams about fictional ladies again #THERE ARE A BUNCH OF US WHO TALK ABOUT THIS SHIT ALL THE TIME ASK US ABOUT IT #ppl say this as if there aren't plenty of flatly-written boring male characters too. who still get popular. or like. expanded on by fandom #look I know I complain about this LITERALLY every day but if your response is just 'there are no good women in anything :(' then #a) you're an idiot and b) I don't want to talk to you because I cannot help you #like stfu and deal with your misogny like at some point you have to learn how to care about women #(YES obviously fiction isn't reality & this isn't the end all be all of activism but WE GOTTA FIX THE LITTLE STUFF TO CHANGE THE BIG STUFF)#(there's also something in here about how a lot of the male characters who tend to be hated more-in my experience-look or #act more in line with what society considers 'stereotypically feminine' which is. we don't have time to get into that right now)#ANYWAY.#MAYBE YOU COULD WATCH/READ THINGS THAT ARE /CREATED/ BY WOMEN SOMETIMES TOO!!!! (not that that will automatically #fix the problem. obviously women can be shitty writers too.)#consider these posts to be my rent-lowering gunshots #:)

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marietheran · 2 months

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#Went to Confession (again)#am still at my most miserable and confused #look I am aware I cannot ask of the priest to tell me <<oh that was only a venial sin you needn't mind>>#but it's also just really freaking hard when you just cannot tell a venial sin from a mortal one #and I know - I know - if you looked at it my attitude towards life is pretty dumb #to write a scathing report: i view life as a path of least resistance. I'm governed either by whims or by fear #which means I have no middle perspective. It's either what's easier now or being afraid of hell #I hardly pay any attention to matters like health or whatever. if I wasn't afraid of sin I wouldn't care about how things impact my mind #If I wasn't afraid of sin I'd have read Game of Thrones or whatever. and of course I would feel unimaginably dirty afterwards. but at least #I'd have read something interesting right? /s #oh and also I'm literally Emma Bovary minus the adultery but that's a different issue #mostly. some of it is probably more connected than obvious at first glance #I'm miserable and it's not even the sort of misery you can make poetry about.#only scathing character portraits. if i was a character from a novel you would hate me #(i would find the novel boring. mundane. there's nothing romantic in this)#(i wouldn't *prefer* to deal with wars - death of everyone you've known - unbreakable badly worded vows or whatever.#but it makes for better stories)#but again you would hate me in mine #//#therese rambles #therese is in an emotional hole #possibly more than emotional but that's the tag

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iliveinprocrasti-nationn · 1 month

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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else

#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more #I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s #the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything #that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da #lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how #get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to #and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not #be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much #of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in #bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it #into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it #but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted #any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself #not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha #usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day #because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere #I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s #just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway #this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this #bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school #vent tw #yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely #disability #chronically ill #i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho #i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to #anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse #I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours #I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework

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lesbiansanemi · 9 months

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Can Twitter finally just fucking implode I am so sick of hearing about that stupid ass website

#I also just fucking hate it and want it to die anyways #I’ve always hated it due to the insane influence it got in the publishing industry that makes it damn near impossible for some ppl to get #published or involved in the industry at all #like if you’re not on Twitter 24/7 or don’t have the right Twitter connections you literally cannot land a publishing deal el oh el #it was also the shift of so many writers having to do MOST of the marketing for their books rather than the publishing houses #which was ridiculous #like I dunno I literally don’t have the time/energy/socialization or networking skills to try and land an agent via the right fucking tweet #and I think it’s fucking stupid that that was a thing that started happening at all #ppl shouldn’t be pitching fucking books on TWITTER writers shouldn’t have to be public figures on Twitter for the sake of marketing #so I hate that stupid app and want it to fucking die so that new part of the industry goes down with it #like that is actually the main reason for my indescribable rage for Twitter #I hope it dies. and I hope I can stop reading shit about Elon musk for like two fucking minutes #also y’all sound fucking stupid with your ‘Elon is actually THIS dumb’ shit #because like yeah obviously he’s an idiot don’t get me wrong #but he’s not accidentally running Twitter into the ground just because he’s stupid #he’s deliberately trying to kill it because he never wanted to buy in the first place and wants it to become a write off #like yeah he’s still goddamn dumb but he’s NOT doing all this to try and make Twitter profitable el oh el #anyways. I’ll be quiet now y’all are just being annoying about this #kaz rambles

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wickedhawtwexler · 3 months

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speaking of adhd meds i'm very excited/nervous because my doctor and i are going to talk about switching to a non-stimulant adhd med (so i don't have to cry on the phone to my pharmacist every single month 🥲)

#i've been considering this for a few months and i think now is the best time bc i'm going to be unemployed #apparently it takes a bit to build up in your system. and now it's like who cares i have no job anyways!!!#nonstims don't work as well for most people but this focalin has been doing shit for me even when i've taken two at a time so 🤷🏼‍♀️#wellbutrin is also an antidepressant which uh. i definitely need currently 🥲#i tried to get adderall this month so i could be medicated for this job search but it's hopeless lmao. nobody has it. not even my baby dose #and i'm just like. i cannot deal with this right now lmao. if this works even slightly better than focalin i will be happy #m.txt

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wandaluvstacos · 7 months

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my ill advised midnight post is that the asexual community's obsession with calling everyone valid is annoying. I thought we moved on from that in 2015 but I guess not. i don't need anyone's affirmation for being myself, I am myself whether or not anyone on the internet thinks it's cool or not.

What I'd actually like is to find descriptions of experiences that are like mine, but all I find under certain tags are "if you are *insert particular identity* then that's valid!" like... thanks, that's not actually what I need, what I need is specific people with specific experiences to express their frustration with the shit that frustrates me too. I don't need my head patted like I'm a child. Even if you thought I wasn't valid, I would still exist and still have to deal with the world.

#it is so deeply frustrating being ace I swear to god #honestly I find the content triggering in a way I cannot explain #which is why I don't write ace characters usually and I don't go seeking out ace community #I think what I need are just a bunch of ace people who are 40+#I cannot deal with the 18-year-olds right now #like good for them for trying to figure it out but they're at step 1 where as I'm at step 100 looking out over the abyss where the steps en

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vampiratecaptain · 10 months

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replaying da2 and brought aveline to night terrors for the first time and. WHAT was that reaction.

told my mage hawke to her face (on a friendship path. after she wasn’t even mad about the whole betrayal thing bc she’s still in her people-pleaser attitude at this point) that she was less opposed to the gallows bc she, personally, could not resist a demon and implied she didn’t think of mages as people?

and then when hawke asked if she should be locked up the answer was ‘i don’t know’? i can only imagine after hearing that she went and collected anders & merrill to go on some super important business that she desperately needed their help with a good ways outside of kirkwall and fell off the map for a few days at least because she’s an apostate from a family of apostates and that sort of sentence set off every ‘pack up and run‘ instinct she had.

#aspen plays da #da2 #aveline critical #i guess? mostly just cannot keep this thought to myself because WHAT #aveline. you're talking to your mage friend. who you SAW turn down a demon's deal. this sounds a bit like it could be a personal issue.#anyway reevaluating things and alana and aveline's relationship is taking a SHARP nosedive sooner than i thought.#at first it was going to be after she became champion and didn't have to hide her magic anymore. so she had more freedom to not desperately #try and stay in people's good graces. but now. well.#also i did the long road right before this. the tune changed from 'i'll always be there for you hawke' to 'i'm not going to deny i think you #should be locked in the worst circle in thedas which i know is your worst fear btw and also i'll say to your face that i think mages might #not be people. this is an acceptable thing to say to someone i consider a friend'.#WHAT.

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beeapocalypse · 2 years

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that one image that is like ‘autism levels: catastrophic’. that has been the entirety of today

edit if any of you look at the original post. stop touching it stop reblogging it the body is not substantial enough to warrant a contextless reblog i didnt even include the fucking image itself. i do not understand how a post like this is enough for someone to go "yeah. this thing from a person i do not know needs to go on my blog". i get this is the internet and that my blog is a public space but i still do not enjoy this shit. go away

#goodnight goodnight now. tomorrow i will wake up and think more about dd <3 #feel like the refracted affliction is SEVERELY underutilized both ingame and in narrative. it is so so interesting the relationship the--#--color of madness dlc has with stealth when initially the focus seems to be on space+time. the heaviest focus of stealth is the farmlands-#--(a corruption caused by the presence of an entity known as the Sleeper) and the shieldbreakers nightmares and idk what that--#--Means but i will be thinking abt it more tomorrow. a lot of refracted barks speak of entities which others cannot--#--see (a la the whole bloodborne deal of the bizarre existing right there with people that they just cannot see) and the shifting--#--brilliance of The Colors and ash (?) which is like. has their root in space been Shifted in some sort of way ? one foot in the reality--#--humanity exists in one foot in the level of intangible eldritch denizens? the sort which lack actual corporeal vessels and--#--just kind of lurk around ?? the ancestor focused on pigs for so long Because he wanted to pull in an eldritch beast to a physical body--#--like do they (beyond the most powerful like the heart and the sleeper) not have bodies which can exist in human reality ? idk #<-- NONE of that makes sense. i have admittedly not thought a lot abt the farmstead stuff beyond the fun possibilities of time+space--#--getting all mushed around so it is just a lot of questions that i have to actually mull over to have better answers for lol

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camellia-thea · 7 months

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i made the mistake of opening the jellycat website.

they have a jack russell now. it has one black spot across its back like jazzy.