#which he is allowed to be SO THERE
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Baby April and Raph playing <3
When I was little, and we had first gotten our dog, it was recommended that we annoy him (so that when children inevitably yanked on an ear or something he didn't go for the throat). I IMMEDIATELY volunteered for the task, and would bother him constantly (mess with his ears, poke his teeth, etc).
This ^ is something we do as a byproduct of the training. I hook a finger around one of his teeth and he'd gently shake. It reminded me of Raph and April for some reason, so I drew it! :D
#I fr bullied my dog (gently)#also we weren't allowed to mess with him when he was eating or drinking or anything like that#and hes pretty good at letting us know when we are annoying him too much#He's kinda growly around kids- which I think is the main reason why we were supposed to annoy him#and hes a Dalmatian so kids are kinda constantly trying to pet him.#ANYWAYS IT WAS FUN#tmnt#rottmnt#blah blah blah#tmnt raphael#tmnt april#rottmnt raph#rottmnt april
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Ok ok hear me out: it could end in tragedy,, AND have a happy ending. The attempt(s) on Machete’s life force him to flee, he doesn’t even have the chance to find Vasco. Cue gay longing for at least a few years while Machete despairs over the loss of his love, his life, his status. He and Vasco only reunite (again) in their later years. Their relationship is forever flavored with loss and loneliness, but that only means they savor every moment that much more
I also I would like to see them as old men. Vasco would be so droopy :)
You gave me such old dog brainworms.
#Vasco would go white and gray in the face like an old golden retriever and get wrinklier#his golden fur would get shaggy and gradually lose it's shine#at some point he wouldn't be allowed to ride horses anymore which would upset him greatly#he'd get rheumatism and bad back and his hearing would worsen but he'd be an active and jolly type of grandpa#Machete would mellow out considerably if he managed to retire#I'd like to believe he'd be able to find some sort of inner peace in his later years#even in his prime his eyesight was bad and he spent his entire life fearing going blind so if he eventually got cataracts and lost most of#his remaining vision he'd probably be relatively fine with it as it was something he knew to expect#and he would have Vasco to look after him#his left ear had trouble staying upright when he was a pup so it would be kind of funny if it started drooping again#answered#anonymous#Vasco#Machete#own art#own characters#this isn't canon or anything I'm just musing
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Brozone reunion concepts for this little thing based on this ask
As stated in the ask idk fully how this moment would go, this concept was mostly building off the premise presented within the ask :D
Bonus:
#my art#trolls#dreamworks trolls#trolls 3#trolls au#n2 au#trolls john dory#trolls clay#trolls poppy#trolls branch#trolls bruce#trolls floyd#brozone#look at them so silly#in the original script i had accidentally wrote John calling Bruce by his preferred name and i was like#he dont know it yet smh#and had to change it back to spruce#which is where the line 'its bruce but imma let it slide'#comes from#i dont think John in the movie and within this purposefully misnames him#i think its just like a force of habit#and its just harder for him to realize hes saying it wrong until hes corrected#cuz you see he doesnt really get mad when corrected he just gets confused the first time#and then just keeps forgetting after#which i think also was from his mindset of#'im the oldest im not allowed to change' so its like#his brains blocking out the change of spruce to bruce#this is unrelated to the comic as a whole it was just the on the spot thoughts i had while typing#but yeah#itd be a touching reunion for sure!
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KIM KITSURAGI - “Is that. My kineema.”
COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] - Something in him is about to break, *big time*.
EMPATHY - And it’s not going to be pretty, do something!
- DRAMA [Formidable] - Everything is fine!
- “Sure is.”
DRAMA [Formidable: Failure] - Surely he’s aware that he’s not the *only* person in the world who owns a Kineema?
YOU - “Is it really *yours*? I mean, plenty of people have their own Kineemas, right? Like working men, government offices, uh, firefighters I guess, maybe even animal control people? Exactly! A million different people who could’ve driven it into the uh…”
DRAMA - Pause, my liege! Ixnay on the Ineemakay!
YOU - “It could even be our *mysterious* joyrider!”
KIM KITSURAGI - Your frenzied babbling falls deaf to the lieutenant's ears. Instead, he approaches the broken vehicle, sunken in the ice. He moves with a caution and gentleness you haven’t seen him display before.
INLAND EMPIRE - It must be cold and lonely down there, in the icy water. Maybe he could sense its sorrow, calling to him…
PERCEPTION (SIGHT) [Easy: Success] - His hands, which are always stiffly placed behind his back, are trembling.
ENDURANCE - This is the shuffle of a tired, tired man.
HALF LIGHT - He’s going to do something drastic because of you. Oh god, terrible! You’re a terrible liar! You can’t look at this, you just can’t!
VOLITION [Formidable: Success] - It's not *you* who drove his kineema into the sea. You have plenty of faults, but this one is decidedly not yours.
KIM KITSURAGI - He kneels down with his head bowed, casting his face in shadow. He plants a hand on the ice to stabilize himself, squinting to get a better view of the motor carriage. “Detective, it says ‘57’ on it.”
YOU - Sweat drips down your brow, and you feel a terrible headache coming. “Maybe our joyrider has an affinity for that number?”
LOGIC - He's not stupid, he knows that it's not that.
KIM KITSURAGI - “57.”
YOU - “What about 57?”, you brace yourself.
KIM KITSURAGI - “Precinct 57.”
YOU - You wince. “Kim, look-”
KIM KITSURAGI - “When I woke up in the Whirling-in-Rags with no memory of what happened during the days before, I've taken note that something of mine has gone missing.” He grits his teeth. "A very. Important. Something."
He runs his hands over his face, messing his already unkempt hair in the process. Regret creeps up on his features. “God. Fuck. They’re going to fire me over this, they’re not going to hear me out.”
EMPATHY - Desperation settles in the lieutenant's tone. Sadly, you find yourself in agreement, even if you don’t want it to be the truth.
YOU - “People are more valuable than machines, Kim.”
KIM KITSURAGI - “Not people like me.” He rasps.
YOU - “…”
KIM KITSURAGI - Before you can say anything more, you fail to notice the lieutenant carefully walking onto the edge of the ice. He looks over the frigid water, a dizzying blue that mirrors and distorts his exhausted face back to him.
YOU - “Kim?”
KIM KITSURAGI - Seconds pass as he looks to be contemplating something. Out of nowhere, he casually takes another step where the ice ends and the sea begins. It happens all too quick for the lieutenant to even voice a call for help— if he even wanted to — his body plunging into the cold water before your eyes.
YOU - “KIM!!!!”
uhhh bonus stuff? sorry i have swap au brainworms pfttt
(im not sure what skills kim has at the moment so rn he only has narration as his inner monologue ok whoops, i would like to keep harry as the guy who thinks in dialogue trees so im still figuring it out pfttt)
also, this was done bc i wanted to expand on these old scribbles of mine, just like an idea, i just think that he'd be having an even worse time wheezes
#disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#harry du bois#den's disco swap#disco elysium role swap#HI nobody look at the fact that. i am a novice writer at best DFGHJFGH#i had idea for some comic dialogue but it ended up being this instead whoops. i mean i could still draw this as a comic#anyways. i was like. trying to reverse engineer my idea of how kim can change into his bomber jacket instead of his uniform.#which. i dont think you can do with just simple convincing bc that thing is fused to him in spirit so there has to be like a good reason wh#oh it gets ruined! how? it gets like wet or smth! how'd that happened? he threw himself into the sea#also isnt it fitting that my memory problems is making me not remember the things that happen in disco elysium very well wheezes#so whoops if the characterization is a lil off lmaoooooo#but i have been trying to figure out how i want harry to be in this swap au#i dont think he's as well as he wants you to believe he is. and just the image of him pushing this 'youre allowed to be in denial about +#this' to kim about the kineema was so vivid in my head and idk if that tracks but hell. its in there now dfghdjfg#starry don't look#sunnysidedraws#sunnysidedisco
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got him off-balance!
#my art#ds9#star trek deep space nine#julian bashir#elim garak#garashir#watercolor#image desc in alt text#i normally post on mondays but. today im breaking my pattern! getting a little silly. getting a little wild. garashir jumpscare#“tumblr user chitinleg garak would neot easily let himself be swooped off his feet into a hug like that” yes i know BUT!#look at his expression. look at how his arms r pinned. he didnt let this happen LMAO julian just surprised him. grabby huggy human behavior#if you look really closely you can see the tiniest frown in the world on Garak's face. because he's like “EEP !”#cant see bashirs face at all in this only his body but i think we can all imagine that whatevers going thru his head. he needs this hug bad#ALSO. for anyone wondering what the fucked up shadow is that starts at the juncture of the teal sleeve-cap where its set into the armhole#the jumpsuits have a bit of a fold of extra fabric (called an Action Pleat) there which allows for a little more maneuverability of the bod#AND creates a really sleek and flat back panel#because you can see the fabric twists along the side arent grabbing the flat back fabric theyre grabbing the fabric folded beneath it#often times i think about drawing out a dissection of kiras first uniform and this voy era one for other artists to use. bc god knows#i struggled at first to find full body references#they like to shoot ds9 very close to peoples heads. and the camera is so blurry. they smeared butter on that thing. god bless
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“I can’t believe Tom Cruise of all people would stand up for his agent, a Muslim Libyan-American woman, who was being publicly blacklisted for her support of Palestine and calling out the ongoing genocide, including making a rare in-person appearance to CAA headquarters in LA to express his support for her. What a strange person who can ever guess what opinions he will have.”
Look. I’ve studied Tom Cruise a lot. One could even call me a Cruisologist. (Not to be confused with. Well.) And, it’s actually really easy to predict Tom Cruise’s opinion on something. The tricky part is whether it will be made public in a timely manner or not and, if it’s made public at all, will it be a lede buried in favor of pushing a narrative sold on background by a studio exec he pissed off because he didn’t roll over and take their bullshit.
#can’t wait for someone to yell at me for this post so let’s get some things over with:#I know more than you. I don’t care.#but for the record: this post isn’t ‘tom cruise: perfect human who’s never done anything wrong’#it’s ‘tom cruise: complicated person who has lived his entire adult life under an intense microscope and as a result is incredibly private#and tends to not share anything good or bad which has allowed tabloids to fill gaps as they please for clicks.’#I wouldn’t say he’s a Good Person. I’m just saying he’s a Person.
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Compilation of EVERY single time they changed Hobie's filter in the digital version:
Left: Theatrical release Right: Digital release
You might have to click on some of them to get a better look at Hobie, sadly I don't have a video editor that allows me to make better edits than these :')
#This took so long to make lol#cause I had to edit every scene with Hobie from both versions so I could watch them right after one another to compare them#I did this with ALL the scenes he's in also the ones where he's on screen as spider-punk#but they only changed his filters in these scenes so it was a waste of time :')#sidenote: no it wasn't it's never a waste of time to look at hobie I just couldn't use it for my GIFset lol#I also made a bouns one but I'm not allowed to post more than 30 GIFs in one post apparently so I guess I just won't add it then...#but Hobie was basically filterless during all these scenes in the theatrical version#I like that they gave him more different filters in the digital version#the only change I don't like is in the first GIFs#cause like that one post pointed out it looks like they removed his lipstick for some reason#also really wish I had a better video editor so we could get a closer look at Hobie but I did my best with what I had#also slowed some of them down to get a better look at them#been having this idea for a while and now I finally finished it!#which means I can go back to working on my fics now#hopefully lol#also lemme know if there are some other scens you guys want me to make comparisons of#cause I have both versions#the theatrical release isn't the highest quality though so if you know where I can get my hands on a better version lemme know ;)#hobie brown#spider punk#miles morales#spider man#peter b parker#jess drew#miguel o'hara#spider man across the spider verse#across the spider verse#across the spiderverse#atsv#theatrical version
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Hear me out. Ratiorine AU where Aventurine is a mer captured by a group of researchers and Ratio is the scientist brought on board to teach him how to speak and access his intelligence levels.
#aventurine#hsr aventurine#dr ratio#hsr dr ratio#hsr#honkai star rail#star rail#ratiorine#raturine#aventio#mermaid au#mer!aventurine#see ok listen#aventurine is a very smart fish and while he cant speak Human#he can communicate by impressing the idea of something on someone#which is why his speech bubbles are all abstract things bc he communicates by sending the idea of what he wants to say to ppls brains#and hes clever hes our cunning merchant gambler#so while he was initially captured by some researchers to be studied#hes able to charm them up and get them on his side... thus allowing him to have more luxury than the average experiemental subject#ofc none of this reallt matters when the researchers wont let him go free but its the smalle victories...#eventually hell work his way up to freedom#ratio is the poor sap who was dragged into the study half way to teach aventuring how to Be Human basically#he accepts the proposition bc everyone deserves to have knowledge! even fish!#my art#comics#scribbles
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Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen + his brother
#dune#dune part 2#feyd-rautha harkonnen#glossu rabban#feyd rautha#rabban#denis villeneuve#house harkonnen#i love feyd he says we're even and he actually seems to mean it and they just both watch their uncle get brained and don't give a f#also not to get charlie kelly conspiracy board here but vladimir does not threaten to kill rabban in earshot of feyd which is so funny#he's allowed to do it! but not you uncle baron you crusty old b#austin butler#dave bautista
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Have you heard of the "Crowley is Malleus' dad" theory going around? Where Prince Levan (or whatever his name is) didn't actually die and just went out to get some milk and is now known as Dire Crowley, the silly man? The implications of that theory is absolutely hilarious when you think about it
hold on, we can figure this out, we just need LISTS
PROS THAT CROWLEY IS SECRETLY REVAAN/LEVAN/LAVERNE/WHATEVER:
unspecified fae of some kind, with similar coloring to Mal
the animal masks are apparently a Briar Valley thing
has some kind of big blackmailable secret that was alluded to in episode 4, and then as far as I know never brought up again
(unless this was just Azul bullshitting, which is extremely possible)
based on Diablo, which...maybe means something?
has canonically worn Dad Shorts
CONS:
(gestures to Crowley's entire personality)
NO LISTEN Revaan was the guy they sent off on diplomatic missions and to take care of delicate political situations, and...look, I love this dweeb, but would you trust Crowley to be in charge of negotiating your war treaties
despite my brain insisting on reading his name as "Raven", Revaan's title does imply that he was also a dragon (or super into longan berries, I'm not ruling that out)
currently unclear why Lilia "my closest friend Revaan...he is no longer with us...I used to make fun of him for being kind of a priss about eating jerky..." Vanrouge has somehow not noticed or said anything
Malleus' Aloof Anime ~Aristocrat~ vibe had to come from somewhere, and by all accounts it was NOT his mom's side of the family
???:
turns into a bird in the opening, I don't know if that means anything but it's kinda cool, I guess
all that aside, if Malleus and Yuu are any indication, then the Draconias have...questionable taste in their social choices. so anything is possible!
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#disclaimer that this is half joke and half speculation so like. please take it in good spirits and don't yell at me#right now i'm leaning away from crowley being revaan because i think the evidence is currently circumstantial at best#but who knows what the future will bring!#man. whenever i consciously remember that crowley is diablo it also reminds me#that his name is supposed to be pronounced like dear and not like the word dire#which always fucks me up a little bit. this is the worst thing about him bar none.#damnit crowley#anyway every time a new part comes out i rewatch the opening just in case there turns out to be any more foreshadowing#(there never is)#(but that ONE really quick bit where you can see overblot azul means i always have to look)#which is to say i have been carefully reanalyzing all the crowley bits and i have reached the conclusion#that i still have no idea what is going on with him#he may be the world's biggest mastermind or the world's biggest idiot and these are not mutually exclusive#(this is a strictly pro-crowley post btw)#(i'm allowed to make fun of him because i love him dire-ly)
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I have a firm belief that the only way Yellowjackets can end is with the death of each of the remaining survivors and [redacted] was just the first (second, really) of what will be all of them in time. "The wilderness" will reclaim them one by one because they weren't supposed to leave. But also they will be swallowed up by their own darkness in their refusal to acknowledge it and that will be the great tragedy of it. All of their deaths will be preventable, but inevitable in light of the cycles they keep on repeating.
#erin is talking#yellowjackets#whichever one has the role of the storyteller is going to be the last#I think this could be Shauna (the writer) or Misty (the lens through which the others are framed - see: elevating Nat to the queen)#the historian is going to live to bear witness to each end#Lottie however is going to have to close the loop and die#think about it: Lottie has had so many instances of basically asking to be allowed to die and the others denying her that#Laura Lee kicked her out of the afterlife; Van did not allow her to be on the table for their first hunt#The thing about your Jesus figure is that eventually (s)he does have to die#Whether she wanted that role or not she has to close the loop that began with her
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DP x DC: My Brother’s Ghost
So there are a bunch of fics where Danny and Damian are twins and Danny eventually has to go to Gotham or Damian/another bat interacts with Danny as ghost king. But I do you one better. Danny faked his death because of failing a mission/he actually died and his mother brought him back. (Or maybe he revived on his own after constant Lazarus exposure over time and knew he couldn’t go back). Anyways, Danny knew that he needed to go to Bruce Wayne in Gotham if he ever needed anything but only as a last resort as they would expect him to go there. So he’s been monitoring Bruce from afar and immediately knew when Damian joined the bats. He clocked him as the new Robin and started following his hero career more closely. He was content to watch his family from afar. Even after the accident. Then something happens where Robin was said to go missing and when no news showed up after a few days, Danny got worried so figured it couldn’t hurt to do a quick trip to Gotham.
He dresses in all black and a hood made using an old ninja Halloween costume. Not nearly as much protection as his old league uniform but with his ghost powers he doesn’t really need protection. Just anonymity. He goes to Gotham in phantom form, making sure all his white hair is carefully tucked in the black hood so only his green eyes remain. He uses his old assassin training and finds Robin drugged and captured in an old warehouse by the court of owls. Robin clearly isn’t thinking straight but Danny puts him in a simple choke hold to knock him unconscious anyways. Better safe than sorry. He quickly frees the boy and drops him off in an area he knows the other bats are searching. After watching to make sure Damian is safe and a bat finds him, he leaves.
Damian could barely remember his capture but he thought he saw a figure in black with glowing green eyes. He could have sworn the future was trying to kill him but…he woke up looking at another bat (or maybe even the manor). Did his family save him?
Meanwhile, Danny can’t stop thinking about Damian. Despite his assassin training, he was drugged and hurt. Danny thought he could handle himself. He thought he would be safe. But what if this happened again? What if the colony of bats wasn’t enough? So Danny couldn’t help the occasional visit to Gotham to make sure his twin was ok. Most of the time he didn’t do anything, just watched. Sometimes, though, there would be an instance where Damian got out of a dangerous situation and no one knew how. A building collapsed, Damian appeared unharmed outside. A goon was about to get a lucky shot? Somehow the bullet missed or the goon got taken out when no other bats were nearby. Fear gas? Damian faintly remembers warm hands hugging him as he struggled. And while he thought it was weird he heard his brother’s comforting voice when it should be a nightmare, he chalked it up to the fear gas anyways since there was no other explanation.
Yet every time there is a particularly dangerous encounter, he swears he sees the figure in black. Damian sees the figure more and more yet none of his family do. They swore to keep an eye out anyways in case. You never know. Sometimes the figure becomes more clear and Damian has tried to chase them but always loses them quickly. One time the chase lasted at least five minutes and Damian managed to corner the figure in an alleyway only for them to pass through the wall.
The bats suspect that this could either be meta abilities or magic. The funny thing is, there were no traces. No one sees the figure except Damian. No one hears them, and there’s is nothing to indicate their presence, not even footprints. It’s like they were never there and no matter how hard they try, there is no footage of the figure. Sometimes cameras glitch out and sometimes they only show Robin, sometimes neither or they seem to loop on themselves. So the bats are leaning towards Magic.
They call Constantine to give Damian a thorough check and he declares that Damian shows signs of interacting with a ghost. And that stumps everyone. A ghost? If it was a friendly specter like Deadman then he would help everyone, not just Damian. If it was hostile, it would never help Damian. So why is this ghost only focusing on the youngest bat and why? Is there even someone that would come back from the afterlife to help the demon brat, let alone have the will strong enough to manifest a ghost that can affect the living? Damian was a former assassin after all and he’s hardly the friendliest bat. So who would help him that has already died?
Throughout this, Damian is silent. Because there is one person he knows to have died that might do this. One person skilled enough to avoid the other bats and evade Damian during a chase. One person Damian would acknowledge as having a will stronger than his own. But something was wrong…because he was sure that that person didn’t have green eyes.
So the next time the figure shows himself Damian attacks. Not just a chase but an outright challenge. Hand to hand combat. And as Damian punches and kicks, the figure expertly parries each attack. And as the fight goes on, Damian watches. And he knows those moves. Those dodges. Those blocks. He can read this figure’s fighting stance like the back of his hand because he grew up with it.
And Damian knows without a shadow of a doubt as the figure disappears into he ground, that despite the changed eye color, the tan skin, the increased height, his brother’s ghost has come back to watch over him.
And for the first time in many years, Damian cries. That’s how the bats find him.
#Dpxdc#dcxdp#Kizzer’s ideas.#Damian thinks’s Danny’s ghost is haunting him.#Danny helps Damian as a NINJA.#A mute ninja#like a male version of Cass.#Damian only ever sees Danny’s eyes and they glow.#Eventually Danny will start helping other bats like if Damian asks for Danny to help find his brother if he’s missing.#Damian still tries to chase Danny but he maintains DISTANCE.#They’re kinda in the area where DAMAIN is aware of Danny and DANNY knows that Damian knows but he’s still pretending otherwise.#(He also doesn’t know how to interact with Damian. That stunted emotional communication was in there somewhere. It’s genetic).#So Danny sometimes becomes more visible but will always stay at least 20 feet away unless Damian’s in active danger.#Even the bats catch a flicker of him sometimes.#Bruce tries to connect with the ghost of his dead son.#Deadman comes to visit one day and they have a nice chat. Just being near Danny allowed the other to see the ghost too which was weird.#When Danny eventually takes the hood off everyone stares at the face of Damian just with soft white hair#and glowing green eyes.#It was bizarre.#That was the only time he took off the hood though.
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begging touya-nii to buy you pretty pink brass knuckles, with heart-shaped holes and a shimmering coat of magenta chrome, plus a matching pretty pink switchblade, with a razored prismatic blade and a handle encrusted with corresponding iridescent crystals—pearlescent, almost, so it matches yours, niichan!
he won’t, because little girls shouldn’t have such dangerous weapons—nor should they need them, not when they’ve got their big brothers with them, wary sapphire eyes watchful and protective, obsessive and excessive.
he won’t, because little girls shouldn’t sully their soft, sweet palms with such dirty defences—not when they’ve got their big brothers to do it for them, cuticles stained with blood and calluses tarnished with gunpowder, filthy hands strong and rough as they wrap around handles and wrists and triggers, as they push soft, sweet things behind their broad shoulders, against their hard chests, into their childhood beds.
he won’t, because even if he did, little girls wouldn’t know how to use them properly, little girls might hurt themselves—or worse, little girls might hurt their big brothers, might smash bones and split skin and slash hearts, might scratch and claw and gnaw their way loose (all by accident, of course; he knows you’d never do such blasphemous things on purpose, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less).
no, he won’t, but dabi might.
#dabi x reader#todoroki touya x reader#tw:pseudocest#touya nii universe#the idea here (if ur a lil lost which u prob are since u aren’t inside my lil head):#touya-nii would never ever gift you anything that will allow you any sort of independence from him#but DABI (tag dabi in particular was in my mind while writing this) frets and fears and wants to teach you self defense so he knows you’re#always safe—even when you’re not with him
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let! him! have! his! octopus! plush! >:[
(messy extra stuff----)
meanwhile,back at NRC:
(+ here’s a WIP >:] )
#twst#twisted wonderland#jade leech#harveston sledathon#azul ashengrotto#i'm. tagging him because. he's there in spirit in the pic--- and he's under the read more-#ram's art#i mainly used this as a practice for something - which is why it's messyyyyyy#anyways i think he should have been allowed an octopus :[ to limit him to land animals only is mean :[[[[[#also i am. enjoying this event so much fr#oh yea - i sorta tried to wing the fabrics that jade picked----#i. think. at least---#i didn't actually re-read that part so i probably mis-remembered what he picked aha---#oh also also dont look at the sled <3 i sorta . skimmed drawing it#anywaysss mush! mush! little plush octo!!! you can do it!
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#art tag#gortcas#casim carnarvon#sorry guys proper context some other time maybe idk how to do it right now so no caption it is🤕#the tldr is that Gortash offhandedly talked about how Cas can make him as fat as he pleases but really it wont make him him his#basically that he only allows Cas to have his way but hes still in full control#which is true yes and Cas knows that to an extent but its not something he wants to hear#because Cas very much holds onto the hope that Gortash will be his forever at some point. phsyically#because again. Cas won't ever believe just words he simply is unable to even if Gortash could never love anyone else#at the same time while yes he obviously enjoys the whole weight gain he does not consider his own enjoyment a good reason to do things#Cas is someone that very much disregards his own enjoyment of things as well as his wellbeing#Cas is just pulling away instead of acting mad in an obvious way. hes sticking around but hes not feeding or teasing him about his weight#and Gortash? is now left with not knowing how to fix it since Cas isnt acting as he usually does when hes hurt or mad. hes still there#and day after day passes where he yearns to have it back. practically begging Cas to continue so he can prove his devotion#prove that he mustve been wrong with his comment. that Cas can push his body as far as he wants to and he'll be his in the end#thx for reading my tags guys maybe i can share more about this scene some other time🙂↕️ for now just have the art
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am i gonna put you in the book acknowledgements am i gonna be able to say your name without flinching am i ever gonna get a word in edgewise am i ever gonna recover the time i spent with you. computer virus kid; i arrived in your life already begging to be let in. somehow insecure i could even be your friend. like you had a line outside the door and we were all shifting our weight, begging.
you're so fucking good at that - at making people feel like they need to earn you, like you're a commodity none of us can afford. no kindness or careful communication could work on you - you were so good at just going-ghost, about deciding someone just wasn't cool-enough. something about that is super ironic. even the parts of it that weren't romantic felt like a romance book. i wanted you to like me so badly i scrubbed myself clean just so you'd spare me - what. your favor? a look?
okay okay okay. it's just a friendship - if it was even true that we were friends, if you even saw me as someone you trusted. on reddit someone would tell me girl literally just cut her out of your life, it's not that difficult. even i was aware of how fucked up the whole situation was. like, why the fuck do i even care about your approval? you're like, not even that fun to be around. you are often a little bit cruel.
but for almost four years of my life, i thought i had found someone like me. somebody who liked the same things i do. someone who liked to read and who liked making jokes with esoteric references and who spent maybe too much time on the internet and who was absolutely a little bit pretentious. i don't know, something about that was powerful and addictive.
i keep thinking about our last conversation. about how i said - okay, enough is enough. you pushed me too far, you really hurt my feelings.
and how you laughed and said - you think you're the victim?
#spilled ink#warm up#writeblr#she physically assaulted me and then screamed in my face#but not before sh'ing first and blaming it on me#while she was locked in my bathroom. at 1 in the morning#while i begged her to please just calm down and to try taking a deep breath and to go to sleep#and then she was like - ur just like my abuser#bc she had screamed in my face which was triggering to me and i froze like a deer in the headlights#and since i had shut down at that point evidently i was the problem child#i know she is out there telling our mutual friends i abandoned her and it makes me SO pissed off#like dude you spent so much fucking time forgiving & forgetting that your decrepit asshole of a boyfriend#pushed me down in the fucking hallway#but noooo hes <3 troubled <3 at 43 and divorced#bc according to you it's important that u don't '''see anyone as a monster''#but god forbid i not handle you SCREAMING IN MY FACE#i couldnt even get you to say sorry for crossing my original and only boundary you were like ''what did you want me to do''#babe i said 'the bf is not allowed around here he scares me and u said ur broken up with him'#that was the thing i wanted you to do: not fucking invite him to WHERE I LIVED#godddd typing this shit out and knowing it's only 2% of what actually happened makes me feel pathetic#i can't believe i let you treat me like that. you were a TERRIBLE friend.
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