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#which btw. is like. actual feminism.)
lyxchen · 3 months
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I want my gender to be Neurodivergend Little Queer Boy From The 90s and I think I have achieved that by dressing and cutting my hair like Campbell Bain and Alex Mercer
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muppetminge · 4 months
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i once had an argument with a guy about why there aren't any men's shelters, which there are, in abundance (upon being told this he of course pivoted to "why mothers' groups and not parents' groups huh?" which again there are very much both fathers' groups and mixed groups in abundance but ofc that didn't fit into his worldview of '''reverse sexism nowadays''' did it).
anyway i just searched for women's shelters in my area (for volunteering reasons, not anything serious) and there aren't any. but there *is* a men's shelter. so.
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chaiaurchaandni · 1 month
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im so sick of people saying stupid shit like "the patriarchy hurts everyone!! u should care about destroying the patriarchy bec it hurts men too!!" like sure but the patriarchy only hurts men the same way that the recoil force from shooting a gun hurts the shooter lmfaooo the patriarchy literally exists in service of men, the damage it causes to men is accidental and unintentional, it's basically an unexpected backfire. but the patriarchy is deliberately designed to hurt women, to dehumanize women, to belittle women, to degrade women, to reduce women to nothing. it is absolutely insane to even try to equate the damage that the patriarchy causes to women with any damage it causes to men
i know a lot of women say the above lines to get guys to care about feminism and be critical of the patriarchy okay but do you realise how messed up it is to think that men would simply not care about the damage that the patriarchy causes to women if men themselves weren't somehow being disturbed by this system? do you really want men to care about 'smashing the patriarchy' if the sole reason they do it is because they feel like it restricts them, nevermind the centuries of oppression against women?
can we just stop watering down feminism so that it is more palatable and digestible for the same group of people that is directly causing our oppression? feminism is a movement BY, FOR and ABOUT women. we dont need to center men in this movement. we dont need a man to validate feminism by agreeing with it, any decent man would stand up for women even if his rights were not being affected at all
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🗯
#lmaoooo at ppl responding to criticisms of the barbie movie with “yeah but we don’t want to think critically it’s not fun :(”#just. god.#the amount of brain damage the phrase let people enjoy things has led to is rlly shocking#yeah we r being ignorant but in our defense it’s easier to not care so actually ur the problem#like….?#if. you. don’t. care. just. Say That.#you don’t want to examine your own biases/experiences and how they affect your opinions#and people who do make you uncomfortable#which somehow translates to people who actually want to think critically are a problem??#not articulating myself at ALL rn but omfg#i enjoyed the barbie movie like it was decent#but the feminism was very surface level and very white centric#like obviously made with a corporation#so i’m actually getting really sick of seeing so many thin gender conforming cis women act like it’s fucking feminist theory#exact same demographic who act like hyperfeminity in women is punished more than masculinity#you feel me?#like ohmygod the movie was enjoyable it was funny!#but nothing abt it was revolutionary.#anyways rant over i think#which btw just doing this in tags bc this is literally only meant to be perceived my beloved mutuals and chido followers#i don’t need a random person arguing with me abt this so#personalish#edit: also just to add#why are people also being like oh so just bc it has to be a female director it has to be groundbreaking feminism?#valid point but wrong fucking movie bro#that’s a critique of criticism of movies by and abt women that are NOT billed as feminist#textbook whataboutism#this shit just makes my hateritis flare up#ughhhh
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ruestew · 2 years
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I am going through my annoying stereotypical teen girl arc
And I'm THRIVING. 
I LOVE GOING TO THE MALL, I LOVE THE COLOR PINK, I LOVE GIGGLING OVER A BOY BAND (who haven’t made music together in years), I LOVE DOING MY MAKEUP AND I LOVE FANGIRLING OVER SILLY MEDIA.
Younger me would have despised the mere concept of becoming "like other girls”, but who cares?! I am like other girls, I’m human, I have interests and I am complicated, I’m not one-dimensional. We should all be able to express ourselves without the looming thought of being judged by some pricks who don’t care or understand.
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papirouge · 2 years
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I will NEVER be gaslighted into thinking any remote criticism about a woman is misogyny, or being pressured to believe any woman just because we share the same sex
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wild-at-mind · 11 months
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Just went down a googling rabbit hole and found that the MRA-lite blog I used to frequent in 2011-2012 is still there. All of it. Comments intact. Fuck. Me.
Please god don’t let my next depression spiral (i.e. present, it’s happening right now) involve me reading this fucking thing.
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familyabolisher · 7 months
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do you not believe in gendered socialization? not trying to be a bad faith ask btw im a leftist and i generally agree w all ur takes but i do pretty firmly believe in gendered socialization being like a thing w material consequences so im interested in ur take if you’re willing to give it
no. "gendered socialisation" is about a stone's throw away from "sex-based oppression" if we're being real about it. in discourse terms, it gets pulled out to denote an ineluctable state of "womanhood"-subjectivity in those coercively assigned femaleness and ineluctable "manhood"-subjectivity to those coercively assigned maleness; in other words, it gets used as a cudgel for gender essentialism coming from "progressive" types by which the claim that trans women/otherwise TMA people have "male privilege" ("male socialisation") can be smuggled into the discourse; the experiences of cis women and trans men/otherwise transmasc people are privileged as a standardised form of 'female socialisation' that pits them not as agentive within social forms of gender (and as beneficiaries of transmisogyny) but as unilaterally 'oppressed' to the unilaterally 'oppressive' male-socialised. there is no one coherent form of "gendered socialisation"; how gender is coercively socially imposed varies along countless axes that cannot be accounted for under one sole framework. if you want to say that experiences and subjectivities are shaped by misogyny or patriarchy then simply name misogyny and patriarchy as deciding factors. it suffers from the same fundamental issue as many contemporary feminisms ie. that even in its most charitable form, it attempts to present a complete account of "womanhood" and account for transfemininity only after the fact via hamfisted exceptionalism, rather than beginning with transmisogyny as the lynchpin of gendering and developing itself from there.
+ in general i try not to overrely on the language of "socialisation" and "conditioning" to describe behaviours and relationships -- unlike "coercion," which i think identifies the discourses of power + antagonism present in these modes of subject-creation, the language of socialisation and conditioning conjures up this idea of a non-agentive, immutable relationship to gender (one in which gender is not something we do but something that is done to us) which stands fundamentally at odds with what transness should articulate. i guess another way of putting it is that i don't really believe in appeals to what people do or do not "experience" [x does or does not "experience" misogyny etc] as a cogent way of developing an actual theory of oppression + liberation.
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genericpuff · 5 months
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All That Glitters is Not Feminism - An Analysis of LO's Brand of "Feminism" and What Remains of its Fanbase (A Prologue)
So I referenced a certain article in a recent reblog/ask response and I just need to talk about it because what the actual fuck-
This has to have been written by either a bot or a hater who's reached peak god tier level at playing the long con sarcasm game because NOTHING about this feels sincere or even factual. Much of it almost has to be read in a mocking tone for it to make any real sense.
It says "Lore Olympus" (literally in quotations) in just about every single paragraph over and over again and every single talking point revolves EXCLUSIVELY around Persephone, which I suppose comes as no surprise considering that seems to be all the comic - and its fanbase - cares about at this point.
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I really love (/s) how Persephone's "evolution" is being naive and then 'blossoming' into an independent woman who relies entirely on the rich man who groomed her to solve all her problems.
Also all she's done since becoming Queen of the Underworld is abuse lower class people. That's the stuff feminist dreams are made of <3
While we're talking about the main leads, "poster child" is definitely a word for Hades, I think a more appropriate term would be "literal child". And boy howdy, 'god of consent' sure is a title to give the guy who ripped out a lower class satyr's eyeball and beat him half to death.
This man owns slaves, btw. And both he and his "powerful wife" are equally horrible to lower class people, especially women.
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This is hands-down the funniest section of the article and we're only three bullet points in.
Thetis and Persephone have never even so much as spoken one word to each other outside of the courtroom that Thetis technically put her in after plotting against her for an entire season.
Eros is a man. Nothing wrong with that but it comes with the unintentional icky hilarity of implying that because Eros is the gay best friend, that means he's a woman.
They literally don't read this fucking comic-
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Everyone always relies on this weird talking point of Demeter not being able to "let Persephone go"... y'all, she just didn't want Persephone to outright move to Olympus, she wanted her to commute. That was it! That was literally the only problem! She wasn't preventing Persephone from pursuing a higher education or telling her she wasn't allowed to work, she literally fucking encouraged it! And with the added later context of Persephone killing a bunch of mortals - and, ironically, the fact that Persephone was assaulted/put in harm's way by TWO SEPARATE MEN in the first two days of her time in Olympus - yeah, I don't blame Demeter for not wanting her daughter to move cold turkey actually LOL
Also hilarious that they claim Rachel has turned "tradition" into "innovation" when the only thing she's managed to do is set back modern feminism in her young adult readers by 80 years and re-establish misogynist brainwashing in her adult ones. Rachel, your fanbase was literally shipping a victim of abuse with her abuser just a few days ago.
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oh boy this is uh
this is some cult shit ngl
and the "rewriting the script of Greek mythology" part is VERY concerning knowing what we know about Lore Olympus and who it was written by. This is literally cultural appropriation, full stop, and it exists because Lore Olympus - and works like it, made by people like Rachel - exists.
I can't even commit to the original theory that this was written by a bot because it all feels very pointed and intenetional. This is being written by someone who, at the very least, REALLY sucks at media analysis and writing, because the entire article is just "Lore Olympus, buzzword, Lore Olympus, buzzword, buzzword, Lore Olympus", it's like a white knight incantation for guilty virtue signallers who have zero clue what they're talking about. And at worst, yes, it's appropriation from someone who doesn't mind taking a culture's stories and myths and promoting their erasure by people outside of the culture like Rachel.
And that's it, that's literally the article lmao
*EDIT: There was a section here before addressing the writer of the article from a very opinionated POV that, while isn't unusual for what I do here, did feel necessary to remove after I was contacted by the article writer who addressed the flaws in their original article and is now seeking to correct them with revisions/an article rewrite. So I felt it only fair as a compromise to at least remove that section as it really doesn't have a whole lot to do with this post as a whole and can be removed without entirely ruining the flow of this analysis. If/when that article is rewritten, I'll be revisiting this post and my overall analysis !
And honestly, it's all really telling, because this does accurately reflect the state of the LO fanbase.
Not only do many of the people who defend this comic like it's their job not pick up on the blatant misogynist tones that are going on in its narrative (I can't even call them "undertones" anymore, they're no longer that subtle) but whether or not they even read the comic at all is up for debate with how much stuff they tend to get wrong in their own arguments and justifications. And this is something that's VERY regularly seen in the fanbase discussions, readers will constantly be unaware of things that happened because they skimmed through it at lightning speed just to see if Hades and Persephone kiss and so they can get the top comment on Webtoons so they can be "ahead of the fanbase". It's no wonder that Rachel has gotten used to getting away with retconning things because her fanbase didn't even read what she established the first time.
Rachel's fanbase was literally defending the romance ship of an abuser and his victim on the newest FP episode preview. When that FP episode came out two nights ago and Hera said, point blank, that he didn't love her but abused her, I could only think of that portion of the fanbase who was very audibly simping over Kronos in the IG comment section. Are they actually having their moment of shameful clarity now? Or are they just gonna move the goalposts and pretend that didn't happen?
I don't want to say anything bad about Shelby here because she really seems like she's fighting for her life on this site that she's trying to get off the ground, but a lot of her other articles also come across as very one-note while being peppered with buzzwords that make it seem like what she's talking about is "progressive" when it really isn't. Case in point, Lessons in Chemistry has been commonly criticized for not actually appealing to the demographic that its Mary Sue-ish main character is supposed to represent - women in STEM career fields.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Lore Olympus is not 'feminism', it's white feminism that is designed to appeal to predominantly heterocis white women who think the solution to misogyny is to willingly submit to it and accept the status quo - that it's "empowering" if the woman is smiling and having all her needs paid for by a man. Sure, I can accept that different women will be looking for different relationship dynamics, some women genuinely are happy being in a relationship where they support their husbands first and foremost. But can that truly be called feminism? Or is the real feminism the choices we make along the way that we should be given the freedom to make?
It says a lot about the folks who tend to regularly prop up LO on a pedestal like this as some "revolution in feminism" despite the contrary after spending more than just 30 seconds skimming the attention-grabbing art, and Shelby is just one of many. She's not the worst of the bunch, though.
That goes to someone else who I want to give proper light to in their own essay. Someone who definitely earned a good stern talking-to this past week and has, thankfully, had consequences dished out to her for her horrible actions towards queer POC writers.
If you know, you know. If you don't, buckle up.
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mrvlbimbo · 2 years
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hii, i wanted to request eddie and bimbo reader!! a unique pair, but reader likes metal and rock music, and they find other ways to bond later!! ( you can take the last however lol )
Genuinely love this character and their dynamic sm in this fic!!! I was going to wait to post it till I wrote everything I wanted to with this HC but I figured I’d pass it off to y’all and see what u think abt it as well
(Finally living up to my username ig)
Eddie x Bimbo!reader (this is going to be a series btw)
1.6k words
When the hottest girl in his math class asked him out he thought someone was playing a cruel trick on him. Like haha laugh at the freak and his massive crush on the school bimbo.
She came into pre-calc that day all giggling and happy and usual. She sat down right next to him, now that was unusual. Twirling her hair and smiling, she leaned over to him and asked “Hey Eddie, what are you doing this weekend?”
“I dunno.” His heart raced when she ran a finger over his bicep and looked up at him, fluttering her eyelashes.
Her nails were done in a French tip manicure and he wondered how she got anything done with nails that long and fancy. “I have tickets to a rock concert. Will you go with me?” She bit her lip in anticipation of his answer.
He did not give her one, deciding instead to jump out of his seat and rush to the bathroom and not return until the very end of class. She was still right there waiting for him with a pleasant smile. “I’ll have to check my schedule,” he finally answered, still not sure if it was a joke.
She was also repeating her senior year but it didn’t seem to affect her popularity. But that might have had something to do with the fact she was drop dead gorgeous and absurdly friendly and kind. He was skeptical of “preps” like her but he couldn’t imagine she would ask him out as a joke just to be cruel. She didn’t have a cruel bone in her body.
But he also couldn’t imagine her actually wanting to hangout with him. Still perplexed by the time lunch rolled around, he decided to ask the rest of the hellfire club what they thought. They didn’t have any helpful advice, due to the fact they did not believe him.
That was until the girl in question practically skipped over to their table and took the seat right next to Eddie. “Hiiiii Eddie. Did you check your schedule?” she giggled, tapping her nails on the table and looking at him expectantly.
The rest of the group was freaking out now and she had a confused look on her face, soon she was going to get upset if she realized the others were poking fun at them. So he did the only logical thing, grabbing her hand and leading her out of the lunchroom and into his secret spot in the woods.
If she was confused before she was really confused now. But there was still a soft smile on her face when he looked at her. “Why are we out here?” she asked, stepping closer to him. Her hands were resting on his chest and he wasn’t sure if he’d ever been this close to a girl before.
“I wanted to talk to you in private,” he answered, stepping away so he could breathe without taking in her floral femine scent that made him a little bit delirious and very horny.
“It’s ok,” she blurted out, shaking her head and looking a bit embarrassed.
“What?” he asked dumbly.
“If you don’t want to go. It’s ok. I won’t be mad,” she assured him, her gentle tone encouraging him to finally agree to her offer.
“No no. It sounds really fun.” She perked up at that, giving him all the information about the concert and hurrying off back to her other friends who were probably missing her.
They had a really good time at the concert. He stuck by her side the whole night, glaring at any guy who looked at her. Which was a lot of guys, she was very attractive. And it didn’t hurt that she was wearing knee high boots, the shortest and tightest skirt imaginable, and a top that barely qualified as anything other than lingerie.
His eyes were glued to her the entire night and when she asked to stay over at his place that night he thought he had died and gone to heaven. In the morning when he woke to her wearing one of his t-shirts while trying and failing to cook breakfast, he was sure she was an angel.
Their friendship grew quickly. It seemed like she always had an extra ticket for him to go see whatever band she was into at the time. Despite having little in common besides music taste and the same pre-calc class, they got along well.
He was fiercely protective of her once he noticed she wasn’t as popular as she might have seemed. People took advantage of her trusting and kind nature to make fun of her behind her back and it made him sick. From then on anyone who had a bad word to say about her would end up with a ring clad fist to the face.
After months of hanging out, things started to change. She looked at him with this longing in her eyes that he didn’t understand. There was always fondness but now when she looked at him there was hurt piled on top of it.
One day after school he had invited her back to his trailer and when he turned on a movie she just crumpled. He could instantly tell something was wrong. “Hey hey. What's wrong sweetheart?” he asked, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her in for a hug.
He wasn’t much of a hugger before her but she was very affectionate and he tried to match that since it seemed to comfort her. She pushed away and stared at the floor, angry tears starting to fall down her cheeks. “Why haven’t we had sex yet?” she asked softly, the words barely above a whisper as if she was embarrassed to even be saying them.
“Huh?” he questioned, his eyes widening at her words. He was very into her but he was sure that they were nothing more than friends. Had she been waiting for him to make a move this whole time? Now he felt like an idiot.
“We’ve been dating for months now. And at first I kinda liked it because I thought we were taking things slow. Usually guys don't take things slow with me. But like you wont even kiss me and I’m starting to think you don’t even like me that much.” He tried to interrupt her but she just kept rambling, her voice speeding up and shaking a bit since she was still lightly crying. “And then I thought, well maybe he’s just not that into sex but you don’t tell anyone about us either and you never hold my hand.” Her lip trembled when she looked up from the ground to look at him.
He had an utterly dumbfounded expression on his face “We’re dating?”
She ignored his question and kept on with her nervous monologue. “Are you allergic to me? Like my perfume or my shampoo? Because I can change that, it’s not a big deal.”
“We’re dating?” he repeated, sounding more stunned than the last time. The longing stares were starting to make sense now.
“So I just want to know what’s going on,” she finished, looking at him expectantly. She had seemingly not heard his twice-asked question.
“Ok this is a little embarrassing but maybe I didn’t quite realize we were dating,” he admitted awkwardly, fully prepared for her to blow up and never speak to him again.
“It’s not embarrassing, it’s cute. You’re really sweet to me, for a not-boyfriend. I like really really like you.”
“I don’t wanna be a not-boyfriend.”
“What-what does that mean?” Her face fell, confusion and hurt setting back in.
“C’mere, I’m such an idiot.” He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against his chest tightly. She gasped, hands steadying her on his chest and clutching the fabric of his shirt. “Let me take you on a date officially alright?”
“Ok!” she perked right up when he touched her, bubbly and happy once again at the idea of a date.
Their first date was to the county fair. He took her on the ferris wheel and as she had earlier mentioned was an issue, he did hold her hand this time. When the wheel abruptly stopped right as they were at the top, he took it as his opportunity to finally make his move.
When he cupped her cheek and turned her face to him she said “Oh no! We’re stuck.” She was pouting with a very serious expression on her face, not quite understanding that the ride had stopped on purpose.
“No. They just do that so you can get a nice view from the top,” he explained, gazing lovingly into her eyes as if he was trying to send her a really sweet telepathic message.
“Oh. It’s beautiful,” she gasped, not taking her eyes off of him for one second.
“Can I kiss you?“ he asked, already leaning in so their lips brushed.
“Oh Eddie. Please.” He loved the way she said his name but in that moment he loved even more the way her lips moved against his. Her pink nails scratched at his chest over his shirt as she moaned and whimpered into his mouth, quickly getting worked up just from kissing.
When her hand started to slip down his chest and closer to the growing bulge in his pants, he had to stop her. “Woah. Let’s uh wait for that.”
“Why?” She asked innocently, batting her eyelashes up at him.
“Because we’re at the county fair and I think handjobs are generally frowned upon in that setting.”
“Oh yeah,” she giggled, turning to rest her head on his chest instead.
“I know it’s probably soon for this but I think I love you,” he whispered, kissing the top of her head lightly as he stared down at her sweet smile.
“I love you too, Eddie,” she replied, tilting her head up to meet his lips again.
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(lmk if you want to be added, and for those of you who are on it can u lmk if your tag is working bc its been giving me trouble)
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exeggcute · 4 months
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well it's been almost six months which I think is long enough to break my posting embargo, so, uh: guess what! I got liposuction lol. specifically hip/thigh lipo to quell some pretty wicked dysphoria that stemmed from having such a feminine silhouette… and I have to say I'm really, really pleased with the results.
tbh my initial plan was to keep things under wraps for good which is why I haven't said anything about it yet (and even as I'm typing this up I keep debating whether to post it or trash it)—partly because I was/am worried people might Act Weird about it and partly because I get a little embarrassed talking about bodygendershit in general. but here we are. one reason I do feel compelled to finally share, other than being super happy about how everything went, is that I haven't encountered a lot of discussions about body sculpting as a possible avenue of gender-affirming care (although, to be fair, maybe I just haven't been looking in the right places) and I figured at least one person out there would be interested to learn about what I did and where I've ended up so far.
anyway. pics/details under the cut—nothing even remotely risqué (or yucky), I just know that body image stuff is fraught + not everyone is eager to hear surgery talk.
to be precise: I got tumescent liposuction of the inner and outer thigh, plus this ultrasound thing to help the skin shrink. a different surgeon who I consulted (but ultimately did not go with for a number of reasons) said that even if I got the results I wanted from lipo, which he claimed was unlikely, the affected skin would look loose/baggy/weird forever... and that surgeon was wrong on both counts lol. my elasticity was great bitch!!!!
they didn't take out that much fat overall, only eight pounds or so, but it's way more about the Where than the How Much. my actual surgeon (who kicks ass btw) said lipo isn't that great for weight loss per se, and what it's really good for is sculpting targeted areas—so basically exactly what I did. six months post-op I actually weigh about the same as what I did pre-op, but the distribution has held steady; more weight goes to my stomach now and less, proportionally, goes to my hips since there are fewer fat cells in that area now. so my silhouette retains its new shape!
the overall change is admittedly on the subtle side, since I'm pretty short and have wide hip bones (and you can't change your literal skeleton) but it's still gone a looooooong way. the main thing I requested from my surgeon was "I want to fit in men's pants" and boy did he deliver.
also a good place to note that if you're in the las vegas area looking for a plastic and/or cosmetic surgeon—this guy is board-certified in both btw—then I absolutely have the guy for you. feel free to DM me for details. lipo is clearly his specialty (and it shows!) but he also does a lot of breast revisions/mastopexy (i.e., fixing implants that other surgeons did a bad job putting in), regular implants, and face work (particularly facial feminization surgery). one thing that sold me on this guy was an enthusiastic yelp review from a local stripper who said he hid the incisions for her breast lift in her armpits so none of her clients would notice that she'd had work done... a true master of his craft
okay you've scrolled enough so I'll give you what you're here for lol. I don't have many pre-op pics because I was obviously unhappy with how I looked and was not taking full-body selfies on a regular basis, but here's a few I took ~2 weeks beforehand:
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these super thin men's joggers were my go-to dysphoria pants, to the point where I bought five pairs in different colors, but now they're so baggy on me that they have the opposite effect and make it look like I have wider hips than I do. so I retired them from my wardrobe...
...except not immediately because I had to wear compression garments 24/7 for the first three months post-op and these joggers were just loose enough to comfortably wear a medical girdle underneath them at all times, 110° degree temperatures be damned. (not that I was going out much for the first month since I was soooooooooooo fucking bruised and sore lol.) here's a few post-op pics in the same style pants:
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(first pic is less than 24 hours post-op, about to go to my follow-up appointment, looking greasy as fuck because I wasn't allowed to shower yet; second pic two days post-op and also post-shower, thankfully; third pic is about a month post-op.)
so, like, CLEAR improvement already. I will not be posting pictures of my black-and-blue-and-swollen-all-over legs but considering how puffy I was from getting internally pummeled with a cannula it's wild that I still saw improvement literally as soon as I came home.
recovery was obviously not a blast in the moment but I got off easy, all things considered. I was supposed to get drains put in and was Not looking forward to that at all lol. the first thing I asked when I woke up after surgery was "how many drains?" because they weren't sure if I'd end up needing two or four, but it turned out the answer was zero. no drains!!!
I did have to lie with my feet elevated for the first two weeks straight, and had major bruising that receded over the first month (you could barely see my regular skin underneath all the mottled spots), but little to no nerve pain, no weird complications, and I was more or less back to normal after six weeks. also noelle took very very good care of me and was brave about injecting me with blood thinners so I wouldn't get clots and die :)
when I went into it I was fully expecting to get huge vertical scars up and down the sides of my legs (and had made peace with it!) but instead I wound up with four tiny incisions like this, each less than two inches long:
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what's totally crazy is that the scars are basically Gone now. like even when I'm trying to find them I struggle to locate the ones in the front. I joked to noelle that if someone did an autopsy on me they might not figure out that I'd had cosmetic surgery, especially since the skin on my thighs is back to its normal color and texture. (in this scenario I like to imagine that it's dana scully giving me the autopsy and I'm in an x-files plot where instead of regular lipo I got alien lipo and mulder figures it out purely by accident.)
with lipo it can take up to a year to see the full results but I already feel so much fucking better in my body that seeing old pre-op pics throws me for a loop. and I can absolutely wear men's pants now—pants for short and stocky men, to be fair, but actual regular men's pants and not exclusively Pants For Men With Huge Butts And Legs. which is the only style I could even hope to fit in before. and even then it was a stretch.
big pic dump of shitty mirror selfies taken over the last few months:
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:)
(also I really debated sharing this one but I already included it in the yelp review I left my surgeon so fuck it: here's a tasteful before-and-after in my undies where you can see my bare legs for easier comparison. left pic is one week pre-op, right pic is about five months post-op. including it as a link instead of embedding it in the post in case your boss happens to be reading over your shoulder at this very moment. also this is the one and only time you will ever see me stripped down on tumblr dot com so don't get used to it lol.)
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boytoyhalo · 4 months
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hey fitpac nation I have a minor (but actually not that minor) bone to pick w yall
i keep seeing people say "oh screw your heteronormative dynamics" about pac calling fit his wife today, like in general I'm seeing a lot of implications that assigning fit the "feminine" role in their dynamic is somehow better or more progressive than assigning it to pac and. I seriously need you all to realize that assigning EITHER man in an m/m relationship the role of "wife" IS heteronormativity. Like, that's what we're doing when we call either of them, or actually any man, a "malewife". we are putting a heterosexual dynamic onto a homosexual relationship that's like the entire point
And like. I get that you think because pac is the smaller and less "traditionally masculine" out of the two (which I have separate thoughts about but that's a post for another day) it's somehow more subversive to assign the role to him but think about it critically for two seconds - why is fit "the wife"? because he's caring and devoted and shows love through acts of service? why are these traits that you associate with the role of wife - do you percieve these as inherently feminine traits? and following that train of thought, is Fit REALLY that much more typically masculine than pac is, or is part of the reason he seems that way just due to the difference in muscularity/size? Do you associate smallness/weakness with femininity?
Listen. the whole malewife thing is fun, we all love a bit of light-hearted forced feminization - but please, stop kidding yourselves. You are not more progressive or less heteronormative for assigning the big buff man the "feminine" relationship label than the people who do it to pac. At the end of the day it's still assigning heteronormative roles to a homosexual relationship, it's still doing so based on traits that you percieve as feminine because of heteronormativity.
and BTW this absolutely applies double if submissiveness is part of your idea of what makes a malewife (which lets be honest it is) why does being submissive make you a wife answer quickly. THATS STILL HETERONORMATIVITY FOLKS
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Anne with an E didn't invent feminism in the Anne of Green Gables series
I just saw a post on tumblr about how AWAE has feminism (as opposed to the original series, which apparently doesn't???) and my reply went past the word count, so here it is:
Firstly, I think that Anne is an incredibly well-done feminist character in her own right, and that's what offers her enduring popularity. She literally smacks a slate over the head of a boy who comments on her looks, publishes stories, is the first girl from Avonlea to go to Redmond, succeeds wildly at Queen's, is principal of a school, refuses to marry at all unless it's for love, etc. Moreover, she does all of this while being interested in fashion and typical 'girly' things, as well as remaining a flawed character who still feels completely real. She doesn't reject femininity, but she does as she pleases.
It's not like the books push sexism under the rug, either. The mathematics professor at Redmond "detested coeds, and had bitterly opposed their admission to Redmond". The older women of Avonlea don't particularly approve, either- Anne gets plenty of discouragement that Gilbert and Charlie Sloane never receive, and some even admit that they don't find it particularly proper for a girl to receive so much higher education. Specifically, she's told that she's only going to get married. Later in the books people inform her that she will never be married because she's "too particular" (Mrs. Harmon or Jane's mom), and that she should just settle as soon as she can. This is only in Anne of The Island alone, btw. In either the first or second book I think she even voices support for women being ministers, which isn't even a position to be taken for granted today.
There are loads of things I love about AWAE- Ka'kwet's storyline was amazing and added so smoothly, the casting is superb, etc. But they didn't introduce feminism to the series. In effect, I've also heard the argument that AWAE is less feminist. They take out so many of Anne's accomplishments at Redmond, as principal, actually getting published, etc. They remove her conviction on marrying for love. They end her story when she kisses Gilbert as if that's the end of all things lovable and Anne-related (although I know that's more the fault of Netflix than the directors). We never see the town's canonical reaction to going to Redmond, staying a single pringle for as long as she did, etc. In fact, quite the opposite, because the show kind of rushed Anne and Gilbert together, and as a result missed huge chunks of their friendship and romance. Again, not the fault of the directors, but I can only react to what we actually got... which is the removal of everything feminist about the original series. Yes, they added other points, but still...
Idk, I adore both but it still irks me when people say "if Anne was alive today/written more recently she'd be a huge feminist!!!". Yes, but she already was... in her own time. Anne-girl was a rebel from the start!
All hail Queen Anne 👑
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This crab day thing has gotten so frustrating so fast. The person who suggested it is an anti-abortion anti-feminist right wing christian transphobe. Many of the people spreading additional posts and info are ALSO anti-abortion right wing christian transphobes. Seriously. Start clicking their blogs when you see these posts. Search "abortion" and "feminism" and "trans" and "gender" and "groomer." This is really easy to confirm. But people don't give a shit because "crabs fun." okay.
And its not like people aren't aware of it at this point. Search "crab day" on tumblr and a good chunk of the results are asks saying "hey btw crab day was started by a transphobe/right wing christian." and most of those people have responded with something along the lines of "Um okay but like its a good idea though??? You guys can't even collaborate with conservatives for like a second to achieve a political goal? UGH this is why nothing ever gets done 🙄." or "Um okay but like that post had nothing to do with their political beliefs. so like its fine lol. Crab fun." Or "oh no omg im so sorry thats so gross i deleted the post but im still gonna keep reblogging all the other posts by the conservative transphobic anti abortion right wing christians whos blogs i wont check because we need to save tumblr!!!!"
Let me make this really fucking clear for those who don't get it: it doesn't matter if the post is not about their political beliefs. You and all your mutuals are reblogging them. You are making it easier for them to network and find each other. You are bringing them new followers, a bigger audience, a bigger platform and a bigger pool of people who will spread their oh so relatable non-political posts. Which will bring in more followers. And some of those new followers are going to be young dumbasses who are going to see all their posts about "groomers" and "mutilation" and the evils of porn and the horrors of abortion and how feminism actually harms women and do i need to tell you how that story ends?
You are showing that "crab fun" is way more important to you than the safety of trans tumblr users. You are giving them a bigger platform and a wider net with which to potentially harm trans people. By saying that you're not going to let their political beliefs ruin your fun, you're making it very clear that trans people are less important than your fun. And you're making it VERY fucking clear that you'd RATHER tumblr become a safe and welcoming place for anti-feminist anti-abortion right wing transphobes than give up fun crab.
You are showing that your need to throw money at a corporation is more important to you than trans tumblr users. I get where you are coming from. I do. You want tumblr to keep existing. I want tumblr to keep existing. I also want the other trans people who use this fucking platform to keep existing because frankly, they are the only reason i'm here. and if they aren't safe here and if you will throw us away just to keep tumblr shambling along a little longer then I have no fucking interest in tumblr.
"Okay but we need to save tumblr uwu!!!!" Look I'm just some dumbass and I don't know shit (and to be PERFECTLY honest, so are you), but I think this is a little more complicated than "if we raise enough money we can save the school/family farm/community centre/(insert cozy heartwarming thing that needs to be saved)!" As other smarter people have said, tumblr is operating at a yearly $30 million deficit. Thats $30 million just to break even. For one year. not become profitable. Its not a bail them out once and its all good forever situation. Tumblr is not a small message board run by volunteers who actually use donations to stay afloat. They are not a non-profit. They are not running a pledge drive. Throwing money at a corporation does not a nonprofit make. It makes you a consumer.
Your response to "tumblr making bad changes" is "give them money for making the bad changes to show that we don't like bad changes!! A reverse boycott'll show 'em!!" You sure about that??? (And some of you are calling this """""unionizing?"""" Put that word back on the shelf.) You don't know what you're doing and you're not listening to the smarter people who have tried to explain it to you. And once again, you're showing that this half baked scheme is more important to you than trans tumblr users. because crab fun.
And @everyone whos clambering over each other to "collaborate with conservatives for a good cause," we already fucking know that you love to do this shit. You are the same people who will say "yeah but theres bad people on both sides!!!" and who wont give up your Harry Potter or your Chick-Fil-A. You will throw us under the bus the SECOND it gets you something you want. Even something as stupid and small as pickle brine or a shitty videogame or fucking "crab day." And guess what. The second all your "shared goals" are accomplished and the conservatives get what they want FROM YOU??? You're going straight under that bus too.
And also, isn't it maybe a little hmmmm. SUSPICIOUS that CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS want to throw money at the site that we've been bitching and screaming at for how unfairly it censors any display of queer sexuality????? They don't have the same problems with tumblr that you do. You think that collaborating with THEM is gonna stop that? Gonna get the porn ban reversed? Gonna turn tumblr into a co-op? Gonna "unionize this bitch?" Hello????
If you must. MUST participate in this because crab oh so fun and tumblr is oh so in need of saving then for the LOVE of FUCK make your OWN POST and STOP PLATFORMING THESE PEOPLE. i don't want to hear "Oh but its a good idea it doesn't matter if a bad person came up with it separate art from the artist lol" if you're not MAKING AN ACTUAL EFFORT TO EXCLUDE THEM FROM THIS. BLOCK THEM. CHECK THEIR BLOGS. BLACKLIST THEIR URLS. ITS EASY.
and then maybe go give your $3 to an actual non-profit. or to an actual leftist independent organization. Or wikipedia. Or inaturalist. Or to one of the many hyperspecific message boards out there who are struggling along on donations from like 5 people. Or maybe, maybe, give your fucking $3 to an abortion fund or to a trans person's go fund me so they can buy food. Or to a womens shelter or a fucking homeless person or to any of the other people who anti-abotion anti-feminist right wing christian transphobes want to stop existing.
My partner is afraid to leave the house alone because people with these exact same political beliefs are in power. People are getting their HRT ripped away from them because people with these exact same political beliefs are in power. People are being forced to give birth because people with these exact same political beliefs are in power. Every day I'm ready to get the news that the state my partner is in is no longer safe and we have to figure out an escape plan. These people do REAL HARM in the REAL WORLD and their beliefs are, tbh, way more fucking insidious and mainstream and tolerated than those of TERFs.
But fun crabs are more important. okay.
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respectthepetty · 2 months
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I've been wondering for a while- how did you start getting into all the colour stuff?? I would love an origin story <3 what got you into your passion for deciphering colors and how did you figure out what they mean??
sorry ik it's a lot but ever since I started following you I see colors everywhere and I'm curious of where you started noticing them ((: it's so fun and intriguing to me! I'm usually more of a "foaming at the mouth for the lighting" girlie but it's been a heap of fun figuring out colors with the lights ^^
thanks for everything you do to show us your eye for color btw ♡♡ your blog is so fascinating and I love reading all your theories and notes
@overrgrown, never apologize for asking questions, but I've actually been asked this before by bengiyo. You can find my write up HERE, but the short version of that post is I've always seen colors; therefore, I've always attached meaning to them, even if the meaning was not valid.
TLWR: Appreciate the artists who work on these shows, not me.
In bengiyo's ask, I stated that when I was younger, I thought the colors were showing me what was good and what was bad. That's it. In my defense, I was a kid, so everything really was good or bad in my book with no in-between.
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Even though I've always seen colors, and it comes very naturally to me, the meaning I attached to them when I was younger was very much based on who I was rather than what was being shown to me. Five-year old me thought if someone was dressed all in red that they were the devil. Adult me now knows that isn't always the case. Adult me also knows that red in American (United States) culture means something different than other cultures.
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Not a flex, just a fact, but I have several degrees in languages, linguistics, and rhetoric. What they are in is not super important, but, in general, a formal education has greatly helped me infer meaning from what I'm visually seeing in the media I consume. My degrees are not in film or communications, yet I've taken undergrad and grad-level courses like Visual Media, Multimedia and Visual Communication, Language of Film, Digital Narratives, Cinematography and Lighting, Film Theory & Criticism, Queer Cinema History, Spanish Film & Feminism, and many more all because under this great big academic umbrella of rhetoric and composition lies storytelling.
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And that's what this is really about - How do we tell a story? Regardless if that story is a simple flyer for a school bake sale, a 30-second commercial advertising cleaning wipes, or a 12-episode BL series, how do we get the message across? We can't just rely on ONE thing! We have to use as many things as possible! So when I'm watching a BL series, I'm just not paying attention to the words being spoken or the acting alone. No, I'm paying to the background noise. What do the clothes tell me about the character? What does his apartment tell me about him? And what do the colors mean?! All of it is important!
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I've mentioned this before but I serve on a screening committee for a queer film festival. I actually got involved with the film festival as an undergrad because of one of the film courses. This has allowed me the opportunity to speak to several filmmakers about their process, and all of them have confirmed that the colors were intentional. People who deal with props and costume design have spoken to me about trying to find very specific items that reinforce the story being told. Oh, and theater is a whole different level. Because of the nature of the stage versus film, if it is on the stage, it must have a reason for being there.
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Basically, people who work in visual media work really fucking hard, which you probably know since you love lighting. Most times, 12-hour days are the average, if not longer. This video does a good job of briefly covering the work that goes into costume design, and I timestamped it to begin at the part that covers colors.
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I love seeing colors. I love deciphering them. I love the story they tell.
But they wouldn't be there if the hardworking people behind them didn't do their job, and those are the people who I appreciate.
So, as always, I'm thankful that you let me know I'm helping you see the beauty is in the details, but I'm really just here to admire the beauty with you.
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littlemisssatanist · 20 days
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can i ask for a small favor? can you rant about daemon targaryen please? i just re-read your team green 💚 post and i'm reminded of how much ick i feel towards that character, especially in the wake of the team trailers being released.
hiii!!! tysm for this ask i was super happy when i saw it in my inbox i'm flattered people want to hear my opinions lol
my thoughts about daemon are very convoluted. i think he has the potential to be a very interesting character but it's kinda canceled out by the incest and pedophilia thing.
like. i understand it's an incest dragon show but my main issue with team black when it comes to their criticisms. they love to spout endless words about how aegon is a rapist and how alicent is a rape apologist for not... idk slitting his throat i guess.
it's really ironic to me, because these same people will turn around and then yap about how daemyra is the perfect ship. they'll be aghast when you even slightly suggest you enjoy aegon's character in any way but be in an uproar if you dare bash their dashing and roguish prince daemon.
honestly, name one terrible thing aegon did and i'll be able to give you something daemon did that is arguably worse than that.
aegon - raping a servant girl in the show (which honestly i'm treating more as a fanfiction considering how terribly written both the greens and the blacks are).
daemon - uhmmmm probably the whole thing with nettles. you know. the sixteen year old girl he groomed and raped (yes raped because minors aren't able to consent). actually, now that i think of it, he did the exact same thing with rhaenyra too, huh? or does team black find the whole fleabottom episode to be hot and rhaenyra being sexually free? that seems like the sort of thing they'd take from that whole fiasco.
on the topic of blood & cheese: the way some people defend this is honestly sickening.
'but poor luke was killed by his terrible uncle aemond' he was an envoy of war (not to aemond, btw, he owed him no safe haven) and also he kinda. yk. took out his eye. i'm not saying luke deserved to die, but i'm going to be honest this is one of the more mild things that happened during the dance.
whether luke deserved to die (which i'd like to reiterate: i do not think he did. i can understand WHY aemond killed him, but that is not me EXCUSING him. this is for those of you who don't know how to read and will inevitably find a way to start putting words in my mouth) b&c is completely unexcusable.
it's team feminism until its a woman who doesn't fit your little box of badass hottie. it's team feminism until that woman doesn't bow down to rhae-rhae and betray her own family and children in order to join the 'good side.' it's team woman until you point out that rhaenyra was groomed by daemon and continues to make decisions that are decidedly anti-feminist.
this is why i can't stand team black stans who say things like 'i hate the greens except for helaena bc she didn't do anything wrong' because you quite literally cannot do that without admitting that helaena suffered because of the blacks NOT the greens.
helaena suffered bc of DAEMON not because of any actions taken by the greens. DAEMON was the one who orchestrated b&c, the one who sent men to terrorize her and kill her children.
daemon did that.
i have no problem with people who can admit that their faves have flaws. i admit aemond's flaws, daeron's flaws, aegon's flaws. the problem i have with daemon is that his stans are so insufferably annoying and they literally cannot do any of that.
my last thought about daemon (at the moment, at least) is his relationship with strong boys.
lots of tb likes to say that daemon loved those boys like his own and would never do anything to hurt them. and i... honestly find it a little strange, and also a little embarassing, because how am i going to have a better grasp on his character than those that love him most???
i genuinely believe that daemon, had rhaenyra ascended to the throne like viserys planned, he would have caused 'unfortunate accidents' for the strong boys in order to get his blood on the throne. which, btw, was one of the main reasons viserys named rhaenyra heir, to keep daemon from sitting on the throne.
i think it the succession crisis had been between daemon and rhaenyra instead, it would have been a much more interesting storyline.
then again grrm isn't that good at writing interesting storylines when it comes to daemon considering he's a self-insert. honestly i wouldn't be surprised if when he died it was found out that grrm had a fanfiction written somewhere where daemon survived the fight with aemond and got to live out the rest of his boring ass life grooming little girls. who knows.
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