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#when you knew he was scared as fuck
skyppl-e · 2 months
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oh yeah.... im making aus now.... florist au but al haitham is a part time employee at the plant nursery tighnari owns and kaveh keeps running into him
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holy fuck, this gives the zenin so much more lore than what we got in the manga. like the potential is right there to have this great inter-clan generational dispute and cold war but gege just breezes past it and then gets rid of it completely.
with all this cool new shut we’re getting about them, im almost glad that megumi was born a boy. like could you imagine just how much worse the zenin would have been to him if he was a girl? they already have the whole misogyny thing going for them and then their version of jesus pops up and it turns out that it’s a girl who wields their prized technique?
god, i can’t imagine just how much more controlling they would be towards megs, although im still not sure if the whole training until ur bones fall off would still happen. i feel like naoya would be different towards megs but we also know that the zenin are totally okay with incest so i hate where that would go.
It would have been bad.
See, I think the entire training until your bones fall off thing would still happen, but there would be an added layer of cruelty towards it. Because megumi was a little boy who was being trained in a way that even adults couldn’t have handled, so of course he spent a lot of time getting hit and a lot of time crumpling under the pressure and exhaustion. There are very, very few instances where he remembers actually leaving the training room on his own two feet. He usually was pushed until he collapsed and woke up later in the room they kept for him. But if he was a little girl in the same circumstances? They’d make every “failing” about her sex. They’d blame her being a girl for it and constantly use it as a source of sneering superiority.
It would also be bad because she would very much be seen as a source of descendants. Boy Megumi wouldn’t necessarily be exempt from that, but it would happen sooner for girl Megumi.
Bloodline is very important to the Zenin. Inheriting power, techniques—they want to continue the flow of power through the generations. And most of the Zenin clan (and the wider jujutsu world) believe that Megumi is the most powerful Zenin alive right now, if not Gojo’s equal, and the only reason why hes being graded as a Grade Two sorcerer is because gojo’s purposefully sabotaging his development. Like. Mindset is a huge amount of jujutsu ability. Yuuta went from getting beaten up by normal high schoolers to having some combat ability but needing inumaki to handle a semi grade one to being the second most powerful person alive in the span of a few months. He absolutely blitzed the previous second most powerful person alive when he would have lost that same fight a few hours previous. There’s a lot of people convinced Megumi’s on Gojo’s level but he’s been keeping him on a leash since childhood. But the powers still there in his blood.
That’s power the Zenin want to pass on, regardless of gender. But as a boy, Megumi’s got a little bit more leeway—men are accepted as warriors first in the clan, and age won’t affect his ability to procreate. If megumi was a girl? She’s got that goddamn biological clock ticking down. As the ten shadows, I think the Zenin would still expect her as a warrior, but they’d also have a fucking quota she needs to fill before the clock hits zero. And they’d have some very proprietary concerns about making sure no one outside of the clan has a chance to become involved with her. They’d want her to stay within the clan with her partners. And they’d be absolutely creepy and weird about how they went about it. It’s a little bit of a mercy that Megumi’s a boy.
#sea glass gardens#the Zenin already see boy megumi as their property#girl megumi? she’d be doomed#they already see women as property#they’d take a fucking hit out on yuuji I can tell you that#I’m a shameless itafushi shipper and while I don’t really write genderbend I don’t see a reason to change shipping them if I did#yuuji has this angry scary pretty girl who for some reason is down to hold his hand and then her fucking cousins hire a sniper#editing tags because I have more to say it’s one of my flaws#there’s so much of Megumi’s situation as a kid that was just horrible and miserable and full of pain#there were so many times he woke up in that stupid room too beaten up and bruised and exhausted to move#he was too tired to summon his dogs for comfort#and the Zenin hated when he treated his shikigami as pets anyway#I like to think megumi was actually scared of the dark when he was a kid#he was a child who saw monsters and didn’t have an explanation for them#they terrified him#his sister had a monster in the hall closet that wanted to eat her and he tried to be brave but he shook every time it came out#and it only came out at night#he was six. he was afraid of the dark.#he never told the Zenin but he could tell they somehow knew#his room was always kept so dark and there was never a nightlight permitted#he’d just wake up in the pitch and never know if anything was in there with him#he was hurt. he couldn’t move. and he was afraid of the dark#and sometimes megumi feels like he’s still that fucking six year old who got lugged from the training room unconscious and dumped in#the dark alone
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hyumjim · 7 months
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Sacha new punk rock look 🤘(got into some pizza grease and needed a bath)
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hella1975 · 8 months
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the closest ill ever get to being a pick me girl is the joy that fills me when the chefs at work so clearly favouritise me. like im there nicely cleaned up in my smart-casual uniform just a 20 year old waitress smiling my customer service smile and behind me spawns Scary Dog Privilege 10x in the form of several burly middle-aged chefs at least three of which have criminal records and would all stick a bread knife in someone for bothering me
#like it's really funny bc i worked HARD with back of house bc i knew my job would be significantly easier if they liked me#(it speeds your orders through. you can ask for things without being told to fuck off during a rush. they'll get you food on shift etc)#and also there's a stereotype especially in fancier places where floor staff look down on kitchen staff and i think that's shitty#so i was always going to be try with them and be nice but ALSO when i first started my job it was in a peak era so while these days#we're struggling a lot and have had to employ a lot of college kids that dont know what they're doing#when i joined it was all private school girls that would swan about the place very snootily. so the divide between front and back of hosue#was INTENSE when i joined. and there i was a little state school girlie and the chefs immediately recognised that#and took me under their wing. so even though the class angle doesnt exist so much anymore and theres majority state schoolers#im still very much in with the chefs in a way not many of the other floor staff are. and there's also the fact im not scared of them#like chefs ARE rude and a lot of them DONT like or even respect floor staff but i will GLADLY tell them to fuck off if i think it necessary#and that's a language they understand like ironically there's one chef that doesnt get on with ANY of the waitresses#(i talked about him on another post he's the soup one) but he likes me bc when he tried that rude dismissive act i told him to shove it#and now the other waitresses literally SEND ME TO TALK TO HIM when they have questions/want something bc they know he'll listen to me#and me and the head chef are besties and the one kp will talk OVER THE OTHER WAITRESSES' heads and completely blank them#so she can talk to me and it's all just really funny bc the kitchen staff LOVE me and that's not even me being arrogant#it's like a known thing at work that they love me and im just. a 20 year old 5'2 waitress with my little pearl necklace and blouse#and some tattooed ginger mohawked 6ft chef is there getting angry for me when i come in complaining about a table#or the kp that is literally on probation will give me a sticky toffee pudding and tell everyone to leave me the fuck alone LMAO#hella slaves to capitalism
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tiktoks-we-like · 2 years
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GOD I FUCKING HATE RISHI SUNAK
#I WANT TO PUNCH HIM IN HIS STUPUD TORY FACE#IF I HAD MONEY AND KNEW HOW TO HIRE A HITMAN I FUCKING WOULD#HES THE UK PRIME MINISTER BTW IF YOU DONT KNOW#THE PM WE DIDNT EVEN VOTE FOR!!!!!!#AS IN NO ONE VOTED FOR HIM THE PREVIOUS PM STEPPED DOWN AND HE JUST TOOK OVER#AND NOW HES BEING A LITTLE TRANSPHOBIC BELLEND AND I WANT TO FUCKING CASTRATE HIM#HIS WORDS ARE SO FUCKING HARMFUL AND STRAIGHT UP WRONG AND I JSUT WANNA AGSYYSHSYSYSUDIDKDLE 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪#WHEN I CATCH YOU RISHI#on a serious note im fucking terrified and THE APPLAUSE IN THAT ROOM WHILE HE WAS SPEAKING WAS SOME DYSTOPIAN SHIT#i just 🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️#hes fear mongering because hes desperately trying to grab as many votes as possible because everyone fucking hates the tory party rn#because they fucking suck at everything they do and are incapable of actually focusing on real problems#if anyone votes conservative in the next election i already did not believe you had human compassion#but i will no longer believe you are capable of empathy in any form#because WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK#HE JUST FLAT OUT DENIED TRANS PEOPLES EXISTENCE?????? SOMETHING THAT IS SCIENTIFICALLY HISTORICALLY AND SOCIALLY PROVEN?????#WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM#im so angry and so scared#this rhetoric is so fucking dangerous#hes killing people and he doesnt even care#im so so angry#being trans is already hard enough WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM#rishi sunak#i hope you die miserably and alone in a hotel like your best buddy margaret thatcher
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avisisisis · 1 year
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The idea of Anakin trying to “fix” what he did as Vader (or more like redeem himself, since what he did can't be ‘fixed’) by helping people all over the galaxy as a Force Ghost does something to me
#anakin skywalker#darth vader#star wars#like. he goes to tatooine to help children find their way home when there's a sandstorm#he helps the slaves find food and water#when the empire returns he stays with the child soldiers they're using to give them company#he eventually becomes famous#leia and luke hear about this and go investigating#leia gets herself stuck in a shipwreck somehow and anakin helps her fix it without telling her who he is until she's finally safe#anakin regularly talks to luke and tells him stories about his mother. he doesn't see obi wan much but they're way better than before#leia doesn't forgive him (she never will) but after a while she's willing to listen to him#anakin is happy. leia will never forgive him but she can at least try to get to know him better bc that's what they both deserve#anakin is scared of interacting with ben solo bc he doesn't want him to end up the same way he did#still when ben gets lost in the woods he goes to help him. other children used to make fun of ben for never seeing the blue ghost#until he shows himself in front of them and says hi to ben like he knew him from forever#leia's not thrilled but she gets why he did it#anakin is being blocked from talking to ben when he Falls. he promises leia that he'll try to get through him but it's just not working#when ben dies anakin scolds him. that's when ben realizes that “YOU are darth vader??”#“i sure fucking am”#he helps rey and finally gains the courage to talk to ahsoka and apologize to her#just imagine the possibilities#avis talks#avis' post
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spokelseskladden · 2 years
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no but actually, when I was like 16 I decided to get in deep with the cult, like fanatically deep. Donating my entire allowance and dedicating myself to biweekly bible study deep. Mainly because I had deluded myself into thinking that if only I could become a perfect jehovah’s witness, god would heal my crippling gender dysphoria by either taking pity on me and simply give me a dick and testosterone for the low price of my freedom and dignity, or alternatively taking it away all together and let me live my life blissfully as a cis woman for all eternity in paradise. The latter never sounded appealing to me, and I’m not going to pretend that the blatant sexism within the cult wasn’t a part of it at all, but even if you removed it, I still didn’t particularly care for having tits. I did realize that the former alternative probably wasn’t likely to happen in the end, and that’s probably one of the big reasons I never could admit to actually just being a guy, even though it was kinda obvious. Cause when you know you can’t ever have something, it’s easier to pretend you never wanted it in the first place, lol
#ex jw#isn't it funny that I even entertained the idea of fucking JEHOVAH giving me top surgery or some shit?#dude are you daft? the babykiller who hates the gays? You really think THAT GUY would support trans rights?#also. my OG mutuals probably remembers me sort of coming out as nonbinary back then‚ and i want you to know that I was not#practically everything I ever said about my gender back then wasn't real and I KNEW it wasn't real. I was just scared as fuck lol#cause I couldn't open that can of worms and then close it again. and like yeah. experimenting with gender can be great and important#but I wasn't experimenting‚ I knew it wasn't completely right from the moment I said it and idk. I want that out in the open I guess lol#funny thing is I kinda did that thing AGAIN not that far back when I was like oh yeah any pronouns goes :) oh no it's they/them achtually#oh now im he/they and oh I just want to define anything and blah blah blah#and I was sitting there and I just asked myself what the hell I was doing cause you're a grown ass man and you KNOW you're spewing bullshit#like i thought i would keep things ambigous but in hindsight. the url i had and having my other name in my bio was kinda stupid#in my defence i didn't think about my url and i still don't really mind my legal name so lol#but i realized i was just pussyfooting around everything and i'm tired of it so yeah!#anyway. look at me revealing my fucking lore here. i've gotten way off track and idk what i was trying to get to#if you read this far you get like. knowledge about me you probably didn't want#you're welcome i guess? idk lol#insert drive through meme or something
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lazarus---rising · 7 months
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love (hate) when im Thinking about my childhhod and im like "yeah it was pretty normal and good ithink" and then i fuckingg Rember
#like oh that one wasnt very good !#personal#<- ish#<- but boy are these tags about to be#this is about the time i didnt respond to my dad's text when i was in the middle of a highschool tour with my sibling#(<- they came with cause why the hell not)#and on the drive back home he went on this rant about how we dont know what money's worth (completely unrelated !)#and he literally told us To Our Faces that it wouldve been better if we werent born ! like sir whose fault is that one !!#and theres definitely more but for once im thankful for my head blocking shit out of my memories#and how hed yell at me for making Basic Fucking MIstakes (once when i was EIGHT i spilt water down the stairs and#he yelled at me for .i forgot how long but too fukcing long#and made me get him to bring my cups downstairs for a month after and then he forgot and yelled at me AGAIN#for asking him to bring my cup down AFTER TELLING ME I HAD TO#and so so much more like . the yelling got so bad that when i twisted my ankle#(only real ones remember)#i was scared of telling him cause i KNEW he'd be like 'do you have any clue how much the doctor's gonna cost blah blah'#and i just . didnt tell him#we used to have money issues and he'd always make me feel like shit for asking for anything that costed money ever#so i just didnt tell him when i was sick or injured or when i needed something cause he would get mad at ME like . hello#AnyWay ! so yeah thats the rundown of some of my severe trauma that still affects me to this day
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confinesofmy · 8 months
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my favourite thing about hannibal nbc is that will graham was already very traumatised when the show started. not yet from the gore or the abuse and gaslighting nor from the illness that nearly killed him, but from a lifetime of experience as an autistic person.
he's on-guard at all times, deeply aware that he's different from other people and that sometimes people find him so very interesting that they feel like their interest should outweigh his bodily autonomy. he meets othering from his coworkers with the grim acceptance of a man who fully understands the intricacies of how they are excluding him but also knows he can't stop them. you can see the miles of hurt in almost everything he does, every interaction he has. well, not so much with hannibal after he gets comfortable around him but that's a different post.
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zannolin · 9 months
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you ever get an idea that is sooooo. arghhhhh bites into a roof tile and cries.
#zanna talks#i cant like word it good yet#but i think if mia ever got to talk to ethan after he died like either bc he came back or a SOR situation or whatever#that she should be allowed to be a little angry at him for just giving up. not facing the aftermath.#like you went somewhere you knew i couldnt follow. you left because you knew i was still here to take care of rose.#but you left us alone. you left ME alone.#YOU KNOW like not bc he's a terrible horrible person for doing that but bc shes human and it hurt. what he did hurt.#and anger is a stage of grief for a reason you know#i am 110% convinced he was only able to do that because she wasn't there for him to look her full in the face and say i'm leaving#you cannot change my mind on this#not bc hes scared of her or whatever the fuck ppl seem to think. but bc he loves her. and how can you do that to someone when you can see#the hurt and the realization and the grief dawn in their eyes you know#anyway. sorry ive been thinking about this so hard i had to stop reading rwrb#putting this all in the tags btw bc iiiii am scared of mia winters antis here on tumblr okay dont come for me ppl let me chill#let me have my little ideas. let me be.#like mia would understand in a way why he did it bc she did the same thing except it was different then#they could have saved him. or at least they could have tried. and he just gave up#meanwhile mias been living with the consequences and the guilt of what she did every day for years now#YKNOW.
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fandom-hoarder · 1 year
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I'm in my goth!Sam feels and I can picture Sammy going all out like this when he was a teen.
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ummm, yes, hello bestie this is perf
goth!teen sammy leans into the "evil witch" aesthetic John hates (and dean claims he distrusts by default but can't argue with his dick when Sammy makes himself up 🤷‍♂️) and all the weirdness that goes with it
Sam likes to do freakyass things and see how far he can push Dean, test the limits of his devotion. Test the limits of what he can get Dean to do to him.
Dean whines sometimes about why couldn't Sam try to copy robin tunney's good girl instead, but that is a very weak redirect. Dean does not go for the girl next door. He goes for the pushy girl in his car.
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nyankoizumi · 1 year
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Grabs DHMIS tv show by the shoulders and draws blood like that one meme please please please PLEASE let duck have a turn on the self awareness. Let him go insane. Let him see the situation he is in or show us if he knows it and how he copes with it please please i am begging you they're gonna kill my wife if you don't
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simplydnp · 3 months
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fuck
#trigger warning for anti-queer legislation & transphobia further in the tags#it's just so. awful. and i forget sometimes cause i'm here on my tumblr bubble & i havent left the house in 3 months due to chronic illness#but i am very lucky to live where i live and get to do what i do and i cant even do that anymore. because of this illness#and while im away. theyre. hurting my kiddos. taking away their rights. 'for the children' they say. fuck off.#'leaves them with less choice as adults' what does that even fucking mean. nothing! it means nothing. its to scare you.#do i need to send a letter home to call a child by a nickname instead of their government birthname??#i'll let you all in on a secret: my government name is not char. but my teachers called me it. and my parents didnt need to be notified.#and the world didnt end!#i had a pride flag up in my room. and a kid asked me what it meant. and immediately i knew it was delicate.#hes like whats it for. and im like well. what does a flag mean to you? do you have a flag you connect with?#and the kid was like yeah. its like. community. and im like yeah! that's what this is for some people. it's also a show of support.#and the kid said 'oh i get it.' and then a pause. 'i like the colours' and i said me too!#and we talked about his country flag and other country flags and completely moved on#but he listened! and he learned! this kid hardly listens to me teach but he respects when i'm real.#auoghhh. so many kids affected. genuinely makes me ill. on top of everything.#i dont even know#c.text
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weskinz · 3 months
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maybe if i go back on antidepressants ill ask for wellbutrin
#p#like yes i am pretty depressed rn but i dont feel like killing myself like i did when i was on viibryd#no genetic altercations my ass i was on that shit for years and just now looking back at my messages and notes no wonder i was scaring ppl#i was so anxious one time i had to sit in my brothers room so i knew he wasnt going to die suddenly#and i was so so so scared but it was like there was a mental block where it couldnt become a panic attack jst paranoia#but i was one degree from it. just imagining what i did to him happening to me scared me to death and i had to reassure myself#my mom asked me abt it the other day like 'hmmm. wouldve been nice to let me know you werent on it anymore. seems like a thing your mother-#'-should know.' and like yes since im still completely dependent on her in all aspects but man#i didnt want to explain i had no interest in seeing lisa anymore and i was just done. i was so tired of my lows being so fucking low#and not even noticing they were so bad yknow#do i even know how to be honest anymore. no i dont think of killing myself but i dont see a future for myself either#i have no goals no motivation no nothing#its selfish to want to die but its like that mytoecold dude video where hes like 'if i spilled milk and then killed myself technically-#'-the problem would be gone' like yeah. that is true. how do i get that out of my belief system#he was a raging addict btw i just saw that video. crazy and sad but i guess when you are dealt a bad hand you see eye to eye
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I'm not crying at Blaine and Cori's wedding vows You Are
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