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#txf csm
twinktor-frankenstein · 6 months
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lost-in-ace · 4 months
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randomfoggytiger · 4 months
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Disproving CSM's Conjecture in En Ami
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CSM postulates that Scully and Mulder aren't together because she doesn't fully trust him; that, although she's drawn to powerful men, she is afraid to open herself up to them.
"You'd die for Mulder, but you won't allow yourself to love him."
The problem is, he's wrong.
Because CSM mixed up her fatal flaw with Mulder's.
Self-Denial and Self-Sacrifice
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CSM's theory: Scully rules herself by denial, and Mulder offers himself up as the sacrificial lamb. How is he wrong?
Scully's flaw is self-sacrifice, putting everything she covets from life on hold to join Mulder on his quest (comedically summed up in Bad Blood's "I do it all for you, Mulder! All for you!") The Starbuck-Ahab complex she harbored since childhood-- expressing her love through devotion-- kept her in the car the first year; but the Truth soon became as much about her losses as it did Mulder's tragedies. Unlike Mulder, however, Scully strives to have a life uncomplicated by mess and trauma and the constant grind. So, she sits in the car, year after year, waiting for her partner to adapt to their changing dynamic (which he did not do for almost six of those years.) Her own fears and insecurities are placed under the bootheel of the work; but when life becomes too complicated or emotionally clouded, Scully strikes out in confused rebellion (e.g. Never Again, Milagro, and All Things.) Moreover, Scully is the one who sacrificed what she held dear-- stability, a family, something other than 24/7 monsters and conspiracies-- to bear the cross of Mulder's quest, not the other way 'round. (The realization-- that she does want this life-- and shift does not occur until All Things, a few episodes after En Ami.)
Mulder's fatal flaw is self-denial (and self-punishment): he set aside a normal life out of a determination to find or avenge his sister. If Mulder was self-sacrificial, he would have let Scully walk out of his life a thousand times over and born that heartbreak silently, alone; instead, he stormed out after her and broke down his walls to convince her to stay. Furthermore, his self-denial is ever present even in tender moments, drawing away from emotional vulnerability once danger is past and shying away even faster if Scully draws attention to the present moment. Mulder is the one to deny himself love and a life with Scully (Home, Detour, Dreamland I, Arcadia, etc.), not the one who sacrificed everything he wanted to stay on his quest-- this is what he wants. (The change from obsessive pursuit to measured search begins in The Unnatural, changes wholly in Amor Fati and Millennium, and reaches its conclusion in Closure.)
CSM's Observations
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The reality that CSM observed both agents for years and years and came to the exact opposite conclusion is baffling.
He concluded that Mulder sacrificed normalcy for the Almighty Mission, projecting his own Messiah complex onto his 'protege' and patting himself on the back whenever Mulder was, yet again, tossed to the jaws of Death for the "greater good." He also concluded that Scully stayed in the basement because of the raw power she smelled on Mulder, keeping a cold yet lustful distance because she was afraid to risk her womanly love on the all-consuming passion of his might.
How very dime store novel of Old Smokey.
Both assumptions are, of course, very wrong.
Mulder Dreaded "More" While Scully Hoped for It
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Scully gave many unsubtle hints through the series that she was ready for more with Mulder: her willingness to go down with him in Tooms, her overt jealousy in Syzygy, her pointed inquiry about his family genetics in Home, her displacement and hurt in The Field Where I Died and Never Again and The End and The Beginning and One Son, her "we just keep driving" in Dreamland I, her unspoken 'secret' that was practically ripped from her chest in Milagro, her flirting in The Unnatural, her IVF request, and on and on.
Scully is by nature reticent with her emotions, fearful to fully open up lest she be hurt or become a burden; but in Mulder's case, she's reiterated over and over (Irresistible and Elegy) that their relationship falls into the latter, not former, category. In Emily she is, once again, "alone"; however, the context to her statement is vitally important. In the hospital, she hoped for Mulder to claim a place by her and her daughter's side as co-parent; but when he uncomfortably withdrew instead, it proved that he still wasn't ready for "more." Scully was alone in places Mulder couldn't fill; and so, she said goodbye to that hope, alone; then to her daughter, alone; and bore the little girl's death, alone. The burden of her fully opened heart was too heavy, she assumed, for Mulder... and in a way, she was right-- not until Fight the Future, when forced to confront "them", did Mulder finally acknowledge it. Until then, sacrificially tucking her heart back inside her chest-- for both their sakes-- was what Scully deemed the best course of action. She sticks around for her own reasons, as she says in Memento Mori; but those don't exclude the hope that Mulder will someday "settle down, live something approaching a normal life." (Her plans change in All Things-- but she's not there, yet.)
All those years, it was Mulder who was more emotionally distant. He was content with his life, happy to spin tires down the tarmac forever with his partner. Mulder was willing to deny himself into eternity if it meant not having to sacrifice an aspect of the life or career he was comfortable with and nervous to change for 'more.' It's why he was so afraid in Fight the Future and so proud of himself in The Unnatural (the warmup), Amor Fati (the big swing), and Millennium (the victorious homerun.) Scully is the only one-in-five billion he has: in the past, he could tease about passing genetic muster, about his boyish agility, about so much more, but to act on it? It took him four years to initiate a hug (post here) and seven years to approach a label of sorts for their relationship. Mulder's an overly cautious man, more pessimistic than optimistic when it comes to people sticking around; and any traditional, long-term relationship he'd witnessed had broken down or was held together by deadened respect and a few bratty kids.
Now it's Season 7, he's learned his lessons, and they're here, together.
Or were, until Scully dipped on a sketchy roadtrip with their enemy.
Conclusion
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The most unrealistic part of this episode (amid a host of several others) was that Scully, despite hearing the drivel CSM peddled the entire drive, decided that he had anything worthwhile to say.
Thank you for reading~.
Enjoy!
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that--funny--feeling · 3 months
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CSM and how the lies destroyed the Mulder family: a headcanon
I have a complicated and maybe personal image of CSM that to me makes more sense than whatever they tried to do with his character (since they changed minds so many times).
The focal points of his character are his envy, obsession with control and inability to love.
I think he really envied what Mulder Sr. had with his family, even before Fox and Samantha were born. He had a wife who loved him and above all he did his same job (more or less) but that hadn't turned him evil or selfless. I like to think of William Mulder Sr. as a decent and kind person, at least when he was younger.
Obviously, his life wasn't perfect and he and Teena probably fought a lot because of the secrecy of his work. I think that was the real first struggle about the truth that the Mulder family had (1°). Bill couldn't be honest with his wife about what he was doing and that created a distance. CSM may have taken advantage of this situation, growing closer to Teena maybe while Bill wasn't there for her.
Deep down in the headcanon tunnel from now on, I like to think Teena and CSM didn't have an affair but just a one night thing. Teena probably never forgave herself for that night and never told Bill about it (2°). Bill never asked, but understood what happened (3°).
At this point, CSM wants to have a relationship with her, but she refuses him and just wants to forget what happened. He's insistent and she starts hating him.
Soon after, Teena and Bill's relationship gets better and Fox comes into this world. Now. I'm not sure what to believe (pun intended) on CSM's being his father. Because, in this logic, he could but so could Bill. Surely CSM thought to be Fox's father and thought to have rights on him, no matter what Teena could say about it.
CSM marries Cassandra, they have Jeffrey, he tries to have what Mulder Sr. has but doesn't work. He can't love. His wife starts hating him, his son is a delusion for him. In the meanwhile, Samantha Mulder is born.
When the time of the abductions is closer, Bill and Teena get to choose which one of their children to "sacrifice" (4°). They painfully indicate Fox, because he's older and stronger, but CSM don't even give them the luxury of the choice. Fox is his son, so Samantha will go. That's the moment where the Mulder family irremediably shutters. Teena divorces Bill and Fox will never know anything about this from his family (5°).
Maybe after the abductees' return, CSM goes to Teena, offering her a possible life with him (this could be why he took Samantha and she wasn't returned). She doesn't believe him and swears to never talk to him again.
Samantha starts living with CSM, he has now what Mulder Sr. had, but again, he can't love. She understands that he constantly lies to her and hates him, so she quickly becames useless to him and he uses her for experiments.
His fixation on the Mulders keeps going, because he thinks Fox is his son, but above all because he likes him as a person. He challenges him, has a goal, a conviction, doesn't care what the others think about him. Maybe he thinks they are similar and that's why he sometimes protects him. But again, he doesn't know what love is, so if there's something more important, he's ready to sacrifice him.
He thinks he knows Mulder and tries to get him on his side more than once, but he fails. Mulder was loved and is loved, he knows what love means, he's kind and decent, even more than his father William.
He thinks he knows Scully because of his own past, but he understands nothing about her or their relationship, because it's the complete opposite of what he's ever experienced. ("You'd die for Mulder but you won't allow yourself to love him" he says to Scully in En Ami, while they're already in a relationship.) And he lies, lies, lies, the thing that made him advance in his life. At the cost of love.
What could really have saved the Mulder family, was the truth, that will become Fox's reason of life. If Teena told Bill about her moment of weekness, if he ever asked her instead of acting like nothing ever happened, there could have been hope. Hope to forgive, to go on. But what they did was the opposite, letting Fox enter in these net of lies. Hiding everything from him "for his own good". But that's not what he wanted and accepted ("The truth will save you, Scully. I think it'll save both of us").
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agentmulderrp · 5 months
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morleycigarettes · 1 month
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cahoots
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legislacerator · 16 days
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i have a lot to say on this matter but as someone who has watched the x-files front to back numerous times in the last few years i think people shouldn’t feel obligated to watch the whole ass entire show before they can engage with fan content. especially because show’s lore has, uh, diminishing returns after a certain point
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unremarkablehouse · 28 days
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It’s not just me, but Diana and CSM totally had a lot of chemistry right?! I always assumed they’d slept together and felt like it was heavily implied but maybe that’s just me?
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pookie-mulder · 3 months
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Season 8 AU I will never write (feel free to steal this idea for a fic):
Instead of Doggett becoming Scully’s new partner, the Powers That Be decide to punish Skinner by demoting him and banishing him to the x files
a Bad Guy (Kersh? Someone new?) takes Skinner’s place as AD, causing conflict
(An alternate version: Doggett gets promoted to AD. Scully and Skinner hate him at first, but he slowly proves to them that he can be trusted and ultimately becomes an ally.)
Skinner is honestly kind of relieved because now he gets to protect Scully and her baby and focus all his energy on finding Mulder
At the same time, he’s angry that his leadership position was taken away from him and wants his old job back
Skinner is wrestling with his newfound belief in the paranormal and what that means. He feels guilty that he wasn’t able to save Mulder.
Scully wants to resent him because he’s not Mulder (and he didn’t stop Mulder’s abduction), but at the same time, she’s secretly relieved to have someone she knows will watch her back and is as dedicated to finding Mulder as she is
Plus we all know Skinner has a bit of a crush on Scully — he’s happy for the opportunity to work closely with her and keep her safe, but he respects Mulder (and Scully) way too much to ever act on his feelings.
Skinner just wants Scully to be happy. He knows the only way that will ever happen is if they get Mulder back, so he throws himself into his work, trying everything he can to ensure Mulder’s safe return
His feelings for Scully aren’t his only motivation though. He finds himself caught up in Mulder’s search for The Truth and feels a responsibility to continue his work
Once Mulder comes home, the Powers That Be recognize that Skinner was instrumental in bringing him back, so they reinstate him as AD (maybe with an endorsement from Doggett). He’s overjoyed, of course (with his job and with Mulder’s return), but he misses being out in the field with Scully
It hurts to see the agents together, but he never had the expectation of anything More with Scully. He’s just glad they’re happy together
Idk how it would end. Maybe when William is born, M&S introduce him to Skinner as “Uncle Wally” or something ridiculous and sappy. Skinner knows he did the right thing
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deathsbestgirl · 1 month
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@calimanc okay the william part. i know this won't be popular but i also love it lol (surprise, surprise)
i completely understand why people hate that scully gave william up, but i just don't see any other choice. if mulder didn't leave (because dd sucked lol) it may have worked for them to keep him. but children on a show like this really change things.
it's so freaking bittersweet seeing scully & mulder with william. it's something they both wanted more than they ever let on, than they ever dared to voice.
mulder is william's father, i really don't think there's any doubt about it. they were sleeping together, they were in a romantic relationship, they love each other beyond what anyone can understand. they're two people filled with miracles and this time, they got one they wanted most. it's fucking beautiful. it may undermine her struggle with infertility, like so many other shows do, but this show is built on the impossible & the fantastic, the paranormal & miracles & magic & science. imo, it's perfectly in line with everything else. mulder & scully are the light in dark places, and they desperately needed some light themselves at this time. it's so painful once they're back together and they don't have william, but the logistics would have been so much harder with a baby on the run.
and the truth is, i think it was the only way it could really go. i don't think there was another option. scully would never give up her baby, except when she thinks it's the only way to keep him safe & ensure he lives a full life, a normal life, the possibility of a happy life. it's something she never recovers from. it's the only thing, besides losing mulder, that would break her. it takes scully two decades to face it, and not until she's forced to when they find william. scully is so avoidant of her trauma and she can only face it when she has mulder to put her back up against. mulder lived in his trauma for most of his life. by the revival, i think he's finally started to move "past" it. but william is a deep wound for them both. they lost their chance to be parents, to be a family. to experience their version of normal with a child they always wanted. i can't even comprehend the pain & grief & loss & trauma of this. but somehow, i think this made mulder more stable. he had to live with consequences of it, and grief & some guilt, but not the same way scully had to. if there's one thing these two are good at, it's putting the other first when they need it. mulder sets aside his own because scully can't be rational, can't be strong the way she's always been. this is her weakest spot, her mother mentioning william is what made her absolutely lose it when maggie died. it's sooooo painful, literally beyond comprehension (for me) but i've always been a sucker for pain & grief & angst. it's one of the most human experiences and ddga are just. so good at portraying it.
(csm is a LIAR — it's possible he had a hand in it, given en ami. but he did not impregnate scully. i know people go on about the medicine & science, but like. it's sci-fi. the science doesn't need to be real or accurate. like how many medical dramas are out there with inaccurate medicine lolllll anyway, i do think it's a possibility he gave her some kind of medication to reverse the effects of what they did to her before OR the chip finally healed her. the chip caused her to go into remission, and it's a possibility the technology of the chip is what that guy was trying to give scully. the cure to all disease. anyway. that's just my two cents on that.)
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Say what you will about season 7 of the X Files, there are certainly some clunkers in the season. However the season finale fucks and I will not be taking any criticism. Marita and Krycek cuntily teaming up to fuck over CSM. Krycek later pushing that musty old man down the stairs to the sound of me cheering, no matter how many times I’ve watched the episode. All the Mulder and Scully moments, including the bed cuddles. The reenactment of their first date case. The shot of everyone, including the Lone Gunmen, eating Chinese and talking government conspiracies. That final moment between Scully and Skinner, with the topic of a missing Mulder hanging over the scene and the fact that Scully is pregnant and the father is missing. Just!! It has sooooo many fucking good moments and it makes me go insane every time I watch it.
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notapsychologistfox · 8 months
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numinousmysteries · 5 months
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Power
This is what came into my brain when I saw @mulderscreek's You Still Have a Son Who Needs You challenge. I apologize in advance.
@today-in-fic
[on Ao3]
Teena did not love Carl. He was not her husband. He had his own wife (the bubbly Cassandra who she could not stand) and, she was sure of it, other lovers. However, from the first time they met, she felt inextricably drawn to him.
She was in the backyard of one of Bill’s colleagues, sitting in a cluster with the other wives. Their gossip bored her so she didn’t mind when Bill called her away to meet his newest coworker. When she shook his hand, a shiver ran through her. It felt thrilling. His danger intrigued her.
The Spenders rented a home nearby in Quonochontaug for the summer. They came over for dinner and Cassandra brought a truly repulsive casserole that no one touched. The next day, Teena scraped the gloppy remnants into the trash, washed the glass dish, and drove over to their rental home to return it. She parked down the block and waited until Cassandra left the house, a beach towel and umbrella in tow. Only then did she knock on the door.
Teena typically wasn’t a bold woman. But she needed to see Carl again, alone. He must’ve felt the same because once she deposited the casserole dish on the coffee table, his arms were around her and his tongue at her neck. It was the first of their encounters. Rare, stolen moments when they were free of their spouses.
It was a magnetic pull that went beyond the physical. Even when they were together, their naked bodies pressed close without an atom of space dividing them, she still yearned to go deeper. She wanted to reach into his mind and discover the secrets behind that impenetrable gaze.
They’d been reckless. Once after a dinner party at her home, she was washing dishes in the kitchen. All the guests had gone home except for Carl who stayed to talk shop in the den with Bill. He must’ve excused himself because suddenly she heard him approach her from behind. Silently he covered her mouth with his left hand, used his right to lift up her skirt and enter her. She was terrified Bill would find them, but she didn’t tell him to stop. Bill had been so distracted with work that it’d been weeks since they’d made love. She bit down on his fingers and relished feeling his fullness as her hip bones jammed against the lip of the counter. Nine months later, her son was born.
Teena’s mother had told her that, because she was a woman with no real influence in the world, the smartest thing she could do was attach herself to a powerful man. For her mother, a German Jew, doing so meant the difference between life and death. At first, she thought Bill was a powerful man. He had an elevated position within the state department and traveled in esteemed circles. But Bill was not built to handle authority. It ate away at him and made him small. In contrast, Carl embodied power. It cloaked him like the cloud of cigarette smoke he always left in his wake. She found him irresistible.
She also despised him with a loathing that was equal in intensity with her passion. She realized she hated him the first time he came to visit her newborn son. While other friends of her husband were content with tipping their hat in the baby’s general direction before retreating to the sofa for a congratulatory Scotch with Bill, Carl confidently lifted her child from her arms as if the baby was his own, which, she didn’t want to admit, it very well could have been.
“Look at those eyes,” Carl said, smiling. “You can tell he’s clever. Like a fox. That’s what you should’ve called him.”
Bill, also in thrall to his confident friend, was smitten with the name. She begged him not to, but he made a phone call to an associate in the social security administration and William Mulder Jr. became Fox William Mulder.
She swore she would never be with Carl again, but she broke that vow less than a year later when he came to her one vulnerable night. Bill was away on business. She was delirious from lack of sleep. Fox’s colicky screams echoed in her head. Carl took advantage of her desperation. She told herself it was the last time. It was a promise she made and broke dozens of times over the years.
One summer he asked her to make a choice between her children. Bill was outraged. It was the first time she ever heard him raise his voice at Carl. After Bill stormed out of the house and slammed the door behind him, Carl explained the necessity of the project to her. He said Bill wasn’t thinking rationally. This man has no soul, she thought. To spite Carl, she chose Fox, the boy whose name and eyes always reminded her of him. To show her it was never her choice to begin with, he overruled her.
Bill was out of town, months after Samanthat’s disappearance, when Carl had the audacity to return to her home. He brought her a document that he’d signed calling off the search for Samantha.
“I wanted you to have closure.” He slid the form to her across the kitchen counter and lit a cigarette.
“This isn’t closure. It’s a farce. There was no search because she was never meant to be found.”
She tried to keep her voice down since Fox was in his bedroom. She heard him lightly tossing a baseball in the air, each catch a muffled thwap in his gloved hand. These were the sounds of her home after Samantha’s disappearance. Her son’s idle movements and her husband’s teeth crunching sunflower seeds in his office. Both pounded relentlessly like a tell-tale heart in her ears and the only thing that quieted them was a double dose of Valium swallowed dry.
“Teena.” He brought a hand to her cheek. His fingers felt like icicles against her skin and she pulled away. The touch that once made her swell with desire now made her recoil.
“You need to leave,” she said. “You need to leave here and never come back.”
He took a sweeping glance around the kitchen. Through his eyes, she saw the disarray her house had fallen into. There were dishes piled in the sink, dust on the window blinds that hadn’t been opened in weeks, and a faint odor emanated from the trash can.
“You should get a girl to come and clean,” he replied, ignoring her. “You always kept such a fine home.”
“Get out,” she growled through clenched teeth.
He brought the cigarette to his thin lips then exhaled in her direction. “What’s the rush? Bill won’t be back for a few days, and Fox won’t notice.”
“Don’t talk about my son.”
“The son you were willing to give away? You don’t seem to be paying him much mind now.”
That pushed her to the edge. The pills she took earlier in the day dulled her emotions but her anger broke through. She slapped his face and steeled her eyes to hide the sharp stinging in her palm.
“I’ll come back,” he said with that cagey grin. “Perhaps you’ll be more receptive next time.”
He turned away from her and left the stench of burnt tobacco as a reminder of his presence.
Yet again, she told herself there would be no next time. This man had torn apart her family. But the years were long. She divorced her husband. Her son retreated further and further within himself until he finally fled across the ocean to get away from her. And when Carl came again, she did not resist. Because she was weak and he was power.
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randomfoggytiger · 3 months
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This is an abstract one, so ignore it if nothing comes to you, but I'm curious if there's any fics you can recommend that have the vibe of the dancing sequence at the end of Post Modern Prometheus.
Like carefree, happy, totally in love but repressing it (or not), suave, smiley, that kind of thing. Not actually a tag to the episode itself.
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I have innumerable fics that fit this vibe-- so innumerable, in fact, that this category had to be whittle down to dancing stories, then cut down further to only include Post Modern Prometheus scenes. (But don't worry, there'll be a Part II sometime soon~.)
Partying and Pondering Post Post Modern Prometheus
@scenes-in-between/scullywolf's The Post Modern Prometheus (Ao3)
PMP Mulder is still foggy from the drugs (a precursor to the dancing fics; but begged to be included nonetheless.)
@purrykat/mylifeinshadow's The post-modern prometheus (pretty please)
PMP Scully looks up to see Mulder inviting her to dance.
Diana Alexander's Time Slows Down
PMP Scully's thoughts as she dances.
@agentwhalesong (Ao3/Alt. Ao3) Throughout The Years - Chapter 5
PMP Mulder's bittersweet thoughts as he and Scully dance.
Madeleine Partous's (The Annex) Unbound
Post PMP Scully ponders her druggie-like existence as she and Mulder part ways with the Mutato on a highway surrounded by fields.
a_steady_wish's Things You Said on the Highway
Post PMP Scully enjoyed her dance, bantering with Mulder about doing it again some time.
@leiascully's (Ao3) OctoberFicFest Day 16: Dance (Ao3)
PMP Scully has their dance seared into her memory.
@i-gaze-at-scully/i_gaze_at_scully's
Alter the Ending
AU PMP Mulder dances with Scully under the streetlight.
In black and white
AU PMP Mulder and Scully dance under the streetlight, but with a little more existentialism.
@syntax6/syn's (Alt. Tumblr)
Post PMP Mulder beaten down by Mutato's imprisonment and the fact that "Samantha" hasn't reached out again.
@nowwhateinstein's (Ao3) Don't Know Much About History
Post PMP Mulder invites Scully over for a Thanksgiving movie night. (Does it count if it's not Mulder and Scully dancing?)
@ghostbustermelanieking/skuls’s Unnamed
Post PMP Mulder and Scully celebrate Thanksgiving on the road.
Mulder42Scully5's Getting Out of the Car
Post PMP Mulder pulls over so he and Scully can dance in the rain.
CSM's C'est La Vie
AU PMP Scully invites Mulder along on a luxury couples cruise.
Enjoy!
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agent-troi · 1 year
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It just occurred to me that in musings of a cigarette smoking man CSM is basically writing self insert fanfiction
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