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scruffandyarn · 2 years

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Take My Hand, I'll Start My Journey (6)

Fandom: The Mummy and The Mummy Returns Pairing: Ardeth Bay x f!reader Warnings: Reader's backstory, recounting of her father's and sister's death, recounting the injury that makes her unable to bear children, none of which is super in-depth.

We're starting to get to some feelings here, folks!

Take My Hand Masterlist

Part 6:

“Where did ______ go?” Evelyn had seen your hasty departure down below, and felt a pang of guilt. “Is she alright?”

“I…” Ardeth had upset you, he knew. What he wasn’t aware of was what he’d said to do that. “I do not know. We were merely talking about whether she’d be starting a family and--”

“Oh. Oh no.” She covered her mouth with her hand. “Oh, Ardeth, you didn’t know.”

“Know what?” He needed to apologize to you and he needed to know what he was apologizing for so he wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. “If it is about your son, we are doing everything we can to--”

Evelyn shook her head. “It is Alex, but it isn’t.” She sighed. “It’s not my story to tell, but I made the same mistake, broaching the subject of family with her. It’s…it’s a hard subject for her, but please do not take it personally.”

“It is difficult not to when almost every conversation we’ve ever had results in her not wishing to speak with me.”

“She’s…you know she was a nurse before she became Alex’s governess, right?”

“It is how she was able to help Faraj with her injury, yes.” He already knew you had knowledge of western medicine.

“It didn’t…all I can tell you is it didn’t end well for her. I’m sure there are parts she hasn’t told me, but what she has, it was not good.”

Ardeth felt his heart break, knowing you’d experienced something that had caused you great pain. While he could not reverse time, he wished you would allow him to help you carry such a burden.

“You love her, don’t you?” Evelyn’s smile was soft and knowing.

“I…I care a great deal for her. I could not tell you if it is deep enough to call it love, but I feel it could easily grow to become that.”

“When you first met her--”

He couldn’t stop the corners of his mouth from rising, even if he’d tried. “When she told me I was ‘pretty.’ Though, I’m not sure I could ever come close to her beauty.” He scratched Horus absentmindedly. “And before you ask, I would never hold against her what took place after she’d finished Faraj’s drink. I have felt its effects before and my behavior was much worse.” His smile dropped. “But she did not even speak to me or Faraj once she was no longer affected by it.”

“She was embarrassed. She was sure she had committed some sort of offense to your position as the leader of your people. As soon as we returned to London after that dig, she immediately began researching the Medjai as best she could, trying to find a way to properly apologize.”

“Oh, sweet girl.” Ardeth sighed, realizing that must have been when you’d learned about the twelve tribes.

“Look, she’s already quitting, so it won’t make the situation any worse if I tell you--she feels the same way about you.”

“She has told you this?” Ardeth couldn’t help the skepticism in his voice.

Evelyn merely shrugged. “When you’re the only two women for miles, days and weeks on end, you need someone to talk to.” Truth be told, she honestly considered you closer than any employee could ever be, and the whole situation of you quitting weighed on her. “Please don’t tell her I told you any of this. She is already upset with Rick and me.”

“Why?”

“Well…we haven’t really gone out of our way to push the two of you together, but we haven’t exactly tried not to.”

“Oh. She is embarrassed.” He paused. “Of how she feels about me?”

Evelyn was quick to shake her head. “Not at all. She’s convinced that you would never feel the same way about her.”

“Sweet, naive girl.”

It was only about an hour before you had to make your way back up. Traveling was fine, as long as you could see where you were going. The darkness below had left you only able to feel the rocking of the vessel and only able to think of the conversation you’d abruptly deserted, both of which had increased the queasiness of your stomach.

As soon as your feet hit the deck, a small bundle of feathers flew at you, perching on your shoulder. “Nice to see you again, too, Horus.” You scanned the boat until you spotted Ardeth, who was sitting next to Jonathan in front of the helm.

Right next to your duffle.

No way to avoid him now.

Sighing, you made your way over to him and sat down next to your bag. Thankfully, Jonathan seemed to have passed out in the midday sun. You weren’t sure you could deal with both men at the moment. “You have a very interesting friend here.” Recalling the way Ardeth had held Horus, you offered up your hand as a perch.

“Hold on.” Ardeth looked up from his pack, which he’d opened, revealing the blades encased inside, and immediately began to tug at his leather glove. “It is not his intention, but his talons will hurt if he grasps your bare skin.” Once he had the glove off, he took your hand and began sliding it on you. “There.” He smiled as soon as it was in place. “Now try.”

You had to close your eyes to refocus yourself, that damn smile of his getting to you. “Alright.”

Horus immediately hopped to your hand as soon as you held it up again.

“Oh!” He puffed out his feathers, causing you to grin. “Yes, you’re very lovely.” You reached up with your bare hand to lightly rub down his back. He chirped, his whole body moving with your hand. “You’re quite like a cat, aren’t you?”

As if he could understand what you were saying, he immediately snapped his beak in your direction.

“Horus--”

You ignored Ardeth’s scolding tone. “Apologies, Horus. You are better than any cat could ever be.” He chirped again. “I’d say better than any other bird, as well. My sister had these canaries and all they could do was scream and make a mess.”

“I didn’t realize you have a sister.”

Your face dropped. “Had.”

“I am sorry, ______.” Ardeth made to reach for your hand, but wound up hovering when he realized both of your hands were occupied. Instead, his hand simply dropped to the space between you.

Not thinking of anything other than the dejected look on his face, you placed your ungloved hand on top of his. “You didn’t know.” Seeing his gaze drop to where your hands were had you yanking yours back, suddenly needing to go back to petting the bird you were holding. “I’m sorry.”

“Please don’t apologize for me bringing up what is clearly still a painful memory.”

You nodded, both of you staring at your own hands.

Several minutes ticked by before either of you spoke again. “You do not have to answer if you do not wish to, but could I inquire about your sister?”

“Um…” you kept your eyes glued to your hands as you spoke. “Her name was Faith,” you paused, willing your voice not to break. “We were both nurses--our mother served as a nurse during the Great War and I guess we were both in love with the stories she told us of her time there. Our father had actually been drafted to fight, and when she learned of his death, she decided to do what she could to prevent any more families from losing husbands and fathers.”

“She sounds very brave.”

“She was. Left Faith and me in the care of her sister and went to help.” You smiled a little when Horus nuzzled against your fingers. “She came back…different. Less affectionate than she had been, but I suppose anyone would, after what she’d seen and gone through.” You glanced over at Ardeth, only to come face-to-face with that intense stare he’d given you back when you’d been bleeding out in front of him. Immediately, you diverted your focus back to Horus. “She hadn’t wanted us to go into nursing, but then she passed, and Faith and I decided to uphold her memory and follow in her footsteps.”

“Did you also go to aid--”

You nodded. “Nothing as big as the war mom survived. Except, when we were overrun, we weren’t as lucky as she had been. My sister was wounded and…and she died before the doctors could save her.” You knew, if you closed your eyes, you’d be back in that ramshackled medical tent, holding her hand, feeling it go cold in your own, so you forced yourself to keep them open. “I tried to keep going, to carry on in their honor, but I messed up.” You took a deep breath--you’d come this far in telling him--might as well go all the way. “The next time I assisted in surgery, I panicked. All I could see was my sister, lying there on the table.” Another deep breath. “I’m not proud of it, but I ran. Right out of the operating room. Ended up…ended up costing the soldier his life.” You hung your head in shame. “I was sent home after that. Although, by that time, I didn’t have a home. Not really. Everything reminded me of them. So I sold what I could, and…I guess I kept running. I ended up going to many different places, but I couldn’t run fast enough to escape my mind.”

“Memories are hard to outrun.”

You nodded, feeling exhausted from everything you’d just shared. You wanted to curl up and sleep for a year, but there was still something that you needed to explain. “I’m sorry for leaving earlier, when you were talking about starting a family. I--” you hesitated. “It’ll make this long story even longer.”

“I do not mind hearing you speak,” he paused, before hastily adding, “but only if you’d like to.”

“Alright,” you sighed. “It actually wasn’t long after my sister and I were assigned to our medical unit. We had gone to the closest town to trade supplies for food. Every soldier we treated needed food to eat and we were quickly running low. On our way back, we were robbed. A couple of scared kids with a pocketknife. And Faith, she had quite the mouth on her.” You smiled at the memory of her scolding the two young boys who clearly had no idea what she was saying. “The problem was, they didn’t understand English, and our grasp on the local language was not very good.”

You looked up at Ardeth again, and instead of the intense stare you were expecting, a look of fondness had taken over his features.

“Eventually, we just decided to give them a loaf of bread, but we didn’t know how to tell them our plan. When we pulled a loaf from our bags, they must have thought we were pulling out a weapon because the next thing I knew, one of them started swinging the knife. I’m still not entirely sure how he ended up hitting me in my pelvis, but they took off as soon as they realized they’d gotten me. Faith threw the bread at them, then had to help me limp back to the hospital, all while trying to keep from dropping the rest of the food along the way.” You sighed. “The doctors fixed the wound, but they weren’t able to fix all the damage it caused. Although, according to Faith, at least I did get a souvenir from the encounter.” You patted the pocket you kept your knife in with your free hand.

“I don’t think I under--”

“I can’t have children of my own.” You blurted out, suddenly wanting to get this conversation over with as soon as possible. You didn't want to see the pity in his eyes that you'd felt from everyone else who knew. “The damage from my wound made that an impossibility.”

He stared at you for a moment. “I’m still not sure I understand why that means you cannot start a family.”

Before you could respond to Ardeth, Horus made a sound that you took as agitation. “I’m sorry, love. You do deserve my full attention,” you cooed, happy to have a distraction from your darker thoughts and memories. As soon as you started scratching, he nuzzled once more into your hand. “Anyway, after a while, I needed employment to continue to keep food in my belly. I happened to be in London when I read an advertisement for a governess for ‘a bright young child eager to learn about the world around him.’” You remembered the line because it had come as a very welcome surprise to find that you’d actually be joining in on the expeditions taking him ‘around the world.’

“That’s what led you to the O’Connells.”

You were grateful that he followed your change in the subject. “Correct.”

“And once the creature has been stopped and Alex has been rescued, you’ll continue running?”

His tone wasn’t accusatory, merely inquisitive. Still, it unsettled something inside you. “I…I suppose I will. I’m not really sure how to do anything else.”

“Even the falcon tires and must eventually nest.” He reached out and stroked his fingers along Horus’s spine. “I hope you, too, will find a place to rest someday.”

“I--thank--er--thanks?”

He just smiled like he knew something you didn’t.

#the mummy #the mummy returns #fanfic #ardeth bay fanfic #ardeth bay x reader #ardeth bay #scruff's stuff #look ma #two parts in one day!

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cobbbvanth · 1 year

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star wars, but it’s just the memes

MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU

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babydarkstar · 3 months

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honestly no wonder harrow forced ianthe to lobotomize her so she could save gideon. listen…LISTEN…if i was a secret-war-crime cult nunlet princess worshipped by my entire planet and the only person that (barely) kept me in check was my childhood nemesis—a butch a year older than me, towering over me in stature and physical prowess, and so hot it made my teeth hurt from how hard my jaw clenched in her presence, who wielded a two-handed seven-foot sword and had irritatingly huge biceps and told very lewd stupid jokes and also learned how to wield an entirely new weapon and be my bodyguard with startling accuracy in three months—only to have us finally learn to trust each other because we got invited to a magic murder mystery and then before the bubble burst i spilled the worst secret about myself that i was born because my parents murdered an entire generation and tried to Kill Her along with them and she just wouldnt die, and i told her this expecting a swift death i believed i deserved, only for her to fucking cradle me in her big butch arms and kiss me on my forehead with her soft butch mouth and just. forgive me for a shameful weight ive carried my entire life and then MAKE AN ACTUAL NECRO/CAV VOW with me despite every evil thing i have done to her……to have her tell me, in the end, bleeding and broken after putting up the most beautiful and glorious fight of her life, that she understands purpose and she understands duty and she knows loyalty more fiercely than ever now, that she knows who she is to me, that there is no her without me….to have her backed into a corner and make the ultimate sacrifice…..for me…..to recite scriptural wedding vows of eternity to me in her last wisps of soul-consciousness…..if i thought there was even a snowflake’s chance in the pyre that i could save her by turning myself into her very own locked tomb, i’d be begging ianthe tridentweirdius to crack my skull open and turn me to mush too, goddamn. i understand you harrowhark girl you don’t have to explain a thing to me. god said you couldn’t undo the lyctor’s bond bc it’d kill you. you told god and his angels that not even a lyctor’s bond could outshine the power of female spite and lesbianism and they didn’t listen. they didn’t believe you. but i heard you loud and clear and i was 17 and hormonal and hopelessly romantic not too long ago unlike those fucking dinosaurs and i’m saying it’s valid it’s what i would have done and really everyone should be thanking you for not being worse and more wretched about it, all things considered

#i think about gideon nav every day #she makes me want to eat drywall #shes so jesus shes so her own thing shes so god and savior It Is Finished divinity of love and sacrifice #honestly so much of harrow is so so relatable to me shes so real for everything she does #her little griddlehark meetcute au her little divine highness au #ive already waxed poetic about the harrow nova au #sorry to keep waxing poetic about this but i really am rotted about them #like im going insane. tamsyn muir when i get you tamsyn when i catch you #griddlehark #tlt spoilers #harrowhark nonagesimus #i am you as you are me we are one and two and two and one #i cannot conceive of a universe without you.#should i forget you let my right hand also be forgotten; add more also. if aught but death part me and thee.#I FELL INTO THE WATER AND NOW IM FREE

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aroaceleovaldez · 4 months

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Nico referring to his mom as "Mama" implies he most likely at least used to refer to Hades as "Papa" and i 100% headcanon he still does but mostly in the manner of him having the entire Underworld wrapped around his finger for being the baby of the family

#pjo #riordanverse #nico di angelo #headcanon #my art #nico flexing youngest child privilages by pulling out the most pitiful expression he can manage #anyways i find it fun to explore character word choices #cause yknow no two characters are going to select their words the same way #or even necessarily think about it to the same degree #i like to think Nico thinks about his word choice a lot #so of course every time he uses ''papa'' he fully knows he's pulling the Baby Of The Family card #Hades definitely knows this too but falls for it every time anyways #cause Nico hasnt called him ''papa'' regularly since getting his memory wiped - just detached ''father'' or at best ''dad''#so it just reminds Hades of How Much He Just Wants His Children To Be Happy Like The Old Days #and how much poor Nico has been through and he's just the baby of the family and-#cue Nico smugly staring at the camera cause he knows how much power he holds #also i say Nico is Hades' only son cause mythologically even when Zagreus *is* Hades' son (rarely) he's. dead.#a major part of Zagreus' mythology is that he died #and im p sure every other deity said to be Hades' children are all goddesses and also are like 50% of the time not his #theres also only like 3 of them. and as far as we know in riordanverse canon one of them is implied to not be his daughter #so Nico is Hades' only son and also youngest in the family (cause Hazel is older by a month chronologically or 1 year biologically)#(and everybody else is a deity if children of hades at all)

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fluffyartbl0g · 8 months

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Everytime I go into the Zosopp tag, I just see people SCREAMING CRYING SOBBING about the lack of posts IN the Zosopp tag. THE ZOSOPP ECONOMY IS IN SHAMBLES

#one piece #op fanart #zosopp #roronoa zoro #usopp #this was also just an excuse to play dress up with zoro and usopp XD #oh why is usopp wearing a detective outfit???#well im so glad you asked!!!#The gang stopped at this town on an island and there seemed to be some mysterIOUS shenanigans going on #robin and usopp formed a watson and sherlock holmes duo!!! but only usopp dressed for the part LOL #cue usopp getting super into his role and interviewing whoever he can while robin solves the whole mystery with just a few clues #she likes watching usopp have his fun tho wahah so she follows him around and nudges him in the wrong direction for funsies #the ultimate reveal ... usopp: MS BAKER IS THE ONE WHO STOLE THE COOKI- Robin: yeah they're all trading addictive drugs #Ms baker: DRATS and i wuda gotten away with it too if it werent for u two meddling kids!!!#am i talking about usopp and robin on my zosopp post? yeauh #anyways usopp is like wauwah ROBIN!!!!!! UUUU >:((((!!!!!#then he trots off to zoro because he hasnt seen him all day and he wants to tell him about the fun adventure he just had XD

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strangersteddierthings · 1 year

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Shovel Talk(s) Part One

Part One 🦇Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four

Steve and Eddie aren't even together when Steve gets the Shovel Talk from Eddie's uncle, but it is what tips Steve into talking to Eddie about his feelings, so he's not upset by it.

They aren't dating, not because he doesn't want Eddie, because he absolutely does. It's just that he wants to be sure Eddie wants him back. There are times when he's sure, when Eddie gets into his space a bit too close, or more often, than he does with anyone else. Eddie calls him a thousand and one nicknames, ranging from sweet to irritating but just when Steve thinks that's a perk left just for him, Eddie hands someone else a new nickname (just the one, a voice in Steve's head that sounds suspiciously like Robin says).

Not that any of that is the point. Wayne wouldn't bother to give Steve a shovel talk at all unless he knew how Eddie felt. Wayne is a man of action, and he's never done anything unless it mattered. Meant something. Steve and Wayne have sat in plenty of (what Steve considers to be) awkward silences because Wayne doesn't talk to fill the void of silence.

The point is, Steve drops Eddie off at the house the government so graciously bought for the Munsons, walks Eddie to the door and giving Eddie a hug goodbye. He stays on the porch until Eddie shuts the door and then nearly jumps out of his skin when he hears Wayne call out his name.

"Harrington," Wayne says from the shadows of the wrap around porch.

So, Steve jumps and it's only then he notices that Wayne is sitting at the table and chairs set up on the porch. "Mr. Munson, sir, hi. Hello."

Wayne lets out a chuckle, but it doesn't really sound amused. "I have come to accept that you are nothing like your father, boy, but I do want to make it clear to you, that Eddie means more to me than anything else on this Earth."

"I know, sir."

"I know you do. And while I will forever be grateful that you helped return him to me alive, know that I will not hesitate to make you disappear if you hurt my boy in a way he can't bounce back from."

Steve's not afraid of Wayne, not really, but that doesn't stop him from feeling the need to flee. He doesn't, though, because he'd gotten enough shovel talks from concerned parents in high school, and he knows they can sense weakness. "I can't promise I'd never hurt him, sir, but I can promise it'll never be intentional."

He can't actually see Wayne's face in the darkness but he feels sized up all the same.

"I believe that, Steve," Wayne says, and it's the first time Steve's ever heard his name leave the man's mouth, "now go home."

Wayne's shovel talk was expected. Robin's is not.

"You took Eddie on a date date?" She whispers it as though they aren't alone in Steve's living room. They're laying on the floor in a line, heads next to each other so if they turn slightly to the side they can make eye contact. Steve's not sure why they always end up on the floor for Serious Talk Time.

"Yeah," Steve says, looking away from Robin's face to stare up to the ceiling, "I mean, sorta? We can't like... be open that it was a date, but we went to dinner and a movie and it was nice. Shared a popcorn and played footsie under the diner table."

"Whoa," Robin says. "I never thought you'd- didn't think you'd be brave enough to ask him."

"Me either."

"Steve," Robin sounds serious, so Steve turns to look at her. She studies his face for a moment before she's the one to look away, speaks to the ceiling, "be careful with Eddie, yeah?"

"What? Careful how?"

"I just think you could really fuck him up," Robin says. "You're his first boyfriend, right? That's going to set a precedent for relationships that might happen if you two don't work out. And I hate to say this, because I know you've changed, but like, I saw how a lot of those girls you dated in high school ended up when you broke up with them."

Steve's a little hurt, because Robin's his best friend. She should be giving this talk to Eddie, not him. But, also, he understands. He knows that Robin knew about Eddie's sexuality before he did, knows they bonded over being queer while Steve was still figuring himself out.

Steve also knows that Eddie's never been in a relationship before, Eddie'd told him at much when Steve asked him out. Steve doesn't like that Robin implied that he and Eddie will eventually break up, but no matter how much that thought makes Steve's heart ache, he won't know if it'll happen unless it does.

He just doesn't understand why she seems to think he'll be the one breaking Eddie's heart. It could go the other way.

"Did you OD over there?" Robin asks, trying to lighten the mood.

"No," Steve answers, "I'll be careful."

They've been on four more dates before Nancy knocks on his door. She doesn't accept his invitation to come inside. Just starts speaking on his doorstep.

"As Eddie's Capital P Soulmate," is how she starts that sentence, and it makes something hurt deep inside Steve as he tries not to think about Robin, "I am obligated to remind you that I do own several guns now. And I don't miss."

"Jesus Christ," Steve says, because even Wayne was more subtle, "I got it."

"Good. I do know you'd never hurt him on purpose," Nancy says but Steve doesn't feel reassured.

He thinks that, if she really didn't think he's going to end up hurting Eddie she wouldn't have said anything at all. "Right."

"Well, good talk Steve," and then she's walking down the driveway and climbing into her car.

He closes the door and goes to the kitchen to get himself a beer, mostly so he has something to do besides stew in his emotions. He wonders if Eddie has been given the shovel talk, too? Maybe Robin did the same thing Nancy just did. Showed up unprompted, threatened Eddie with some sort of bodily harm, and then just left.

Steve grabs the phone and dials Eddie's number.

"Hello?" Eddie's voice greets him, albeit questioningly.

"Eddie, it's Steve."

"Oh, hello sweetheart," Eddie says, "are you calling for business or pleasure?"

Steve laughs, "business."

"Boo!"

"Listen, uh, I had a question. I just wanted to know if anyone's said anything to you. About us. Or, y'know, specifically about us and our relationship?"

"Uh, not really? A few congratulations, I guess. Why? Did someone say something?" Eddie's voice is level, almost too level, so Steve knows he's trying to keep cool.

"Oh, no! No! I mean, aside from the scary shovel talk from- Wayne, everyone's been surprisingly cool about it. Very supportive," Steve says and even though it's true, everyone they've told has been cool about it, it feels a little bit like a lie.

Eddie laughs, "I can't believe my uncle gave you a shovel talk! You know, I keep expecting to get one from Robin but so far nothing. She must think you're safe in my capable hands."

Steve is safe in Eddie's hand, he thinks, but that doesn't stop the sting that goes through him. "Of course, she does. You've been a perfect boyfriend."

There's a pause before Eddie's voice comes through the phone, soft and quiet, "I'm glad you said so. I want to be. For you."

"You're not allowed to say those kinds of things when you aren't within kissing distance, babe," Steve says, because if he doesn't add humor to this conversation, he's going to tell Eddie he loves him instead, and even Steve knows that saying that a month into dating is too soon, especially over the phone where he can't see Eddie's reaction.

Eddie laughs and makes kissing sounds at him before the conversation shifts to chatting about the day and making plans for the weekend.

Steve is trying really hard to not be the person he was in high school but every time he gets to the point where he's being a better person, someone brings up how he used to be. Shoves it back into his face that no matter what Steve does he can't outrun his past.

One such time is shortly after Steve and Eddie accidentally come out as a couple to all of Hellfire. Steve was just dropping off the boys and had stepped inside to chat a bit. Once game time had arrived it had and Steve made to leave, they'd (he and Eddie) had been on autopilot. Eddie'd whined 'where's my goodbye kiss?' and Steve had stepped over, kissed him goodbye, and was out the door before it had actually computed.

Steve had burst back through the door, rushing back to Eddie, because no way in Hell was he going to leave his boyfriend to deal with whatever the consequences would be alone.

It had been absolute chaos at the table with people shouting over each other.

"Of all the people you could be with, you picked Steve!? You could do better!" Mike had whined, and Steve had thought for sure he was the only one who had heard Mike until he saw Will punch his arm and hiss his own 'don't be a dick' at Mike.

It took almost half an hour to calm everyone down. It was a relief to know that Eddie had come out to his bandmates/the older Hellfire members already. The kids took it in stride, in the end, and Eddie had shoo'd Steve away.

Jeff had excused himself, too, and Steve thought he was just going to use the bathroom but instead he followed Steve outside.

Ah. Steve knows what's coming.

"Harrington," Jeff says, "can't say I'm excited that you're the secret boyfriend Eddie's constantly sighing wistfully about. I'm sure Wayne's already threatened you," And Robin, and Nancy, and Mike doesn't think he's good enough, "but if you hurt Eddie-"

"I get it! There will be dire consequences if I hurt Eddie," Steve snaps, not down for hearing it anymore. He stomps to his car and peels away from the curb without bothering to look back.

If he's being honest, Steve didn't even know he had a breaking point with shovel talks until he gets his fifth one from Dustin.

It's not even a shovel talk. It's just a single sentence, said almost a month after Dustin learned about their relationship. He's dropping Dustin off after their DnD game. Normally Claudia picks him up, but she's busy tonight and asked Steve to do it.

"Alright, Henderson, safely delivered."

"Thanks, Steve," Dustin says, unbuckles his seatbelt, and opens the door, before turning back to Steve. He just looks at him for a moment.

"What?"

"I'm happy for you and Eddie. Just, don't hurt him, ok?"

He nods his head but can't say anything. Dustin grabs his backpack, shoots him a smile, and climbs out. Steve does wait until Dustin closes the front door behind him before putting the car back in gear.

He manages to get home, somehow, because Steve doesn't fully remember the drive. It's not that his mind was so focused on something else that made him fail to take in his surroundings, but rather that his mind wasn't even a part of his body anymore.

One moment he was pulling away from the Henderson residence, and the next, he was home, just standing in his kitchen in the dark. And now that his thoughts are back, or easier to process, he finds himself wondering why everyone thinks that he's going to be the one to hurt Eddie.

How many people has he hurt that this is his reputation? Is it inevitable that he will hurt Eddie? Is it truly just a matter of time until he breaks Eddies heart? Why is everyone so convinced that he will?

Briefly the thought occurs to him that maybe he should call up Eddie and break up with him right now, before Eddie has a chance to get in deep enough that Steve could break his heart, but just the thought of it breaks Steve's heart, so he's not going to do that. Doesn't want to do that. That would just be punishing Eddie for something he didn't do.

None of this is Eddie's fault, and Steve's an asshole for even thinking of breaking up with him because of it. Which feeds him back into the loop of thinking that maybe everyone is right about him. He is an asshole and will someday hurt Eddie, perhaps even on purpose.

He loves Eddie. He's in love with Eddie. But does loving him mean proving his friends wrong? Or does it mean leaving him before they're proven right?

He wants to ask everyone why they think he'll hurt Eddie.

He wants to ask everyone why they don't care if he's the one that gets hurt.

#steddie #my fic #we like making steve a sad emotional mess right guys?#steve-centric #we gotta make the boy Sad so that his boyfriend can fix him #is that healthy? not IRL but this is fanfic and if i want Love to solve all the problems then im allowed to do that #only itll be in part two #that might get written one day #is steve putting words into his friends' mouths #yeah duh the boy needs therapy but its the 80s so hes not getting any

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