#trying to think “nah it's not all bad” | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

boowritess · 2 days

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so apparently it's really fucking hard to get into the SAS. and ontop of that I've been getting tiktoks of people going around an army base asking why they joined. most responses were to pay off student loans, bills, school, (someone said there's was 6 years of prison or school and *mental note for idea*), the recruiter lied or spoilt them, barracks bunny.

141 (poly?) x notsobaddasssoldier!reader

and now i can't stop thinking of soldier!reader. who really half-assed their way through everything - only doing the job for the money and to pay off student loans + they had nothing better to do.

who somehow ends up being adopted by Price (kinda like Gaz i guess ???) all because reader happened to be in the right place at the right time and saved Price's ass while managing to complete a mission the Task Force were doing.

and it's not that you saved his ass or completed the mission that makes Price go *this is mine* - it's the fact that afterwards all you can say is-

"this shit is so not worth paying off my student loans."

"oh fuck i forgot to cancel my subscription. fuckk- waste of fucking money"

- all the while a building is burning in front of you but yeah just not at all concerned about what had just happened. so price just *grabs you by the back of your neck and holds you up, claiming you as part of his task force now.*

(lol you probably can't do that irl but this is fiction sooo suck my ass.)

and laswell's just like no... they are very much still green john. way too green. no.

but it's too late. he's already introducing you to the task force. singing your praises and you're just like

"man he promised to pay off my student loans and give me food." basically how ur recruiter got ya ass.

enough said. you get the whole off the books speech, saving the world by doing things others wouldn't like. but u couldn't give a rats ass - you should but nah...

and like... you know you're the rookie... you're still green... but some of the shit 141 do you just...

"so you just gonna kidnap the wife AND the child...? right... kid, you wanna watch bluey? here..."

"and you do this often...? crazy."

but you don't exactly protest. how could you with how much you get paid. you kinda just side-eye and look away when it's geta a lil crazy. *bombastic side-eye*

and the other 141 guys - oh my days. become just as enormed as price and want to start really trying to amplify your skills. but every time, they start explaining how to do things - the best way to go about a situation or how to fight a certain way.

you pull this face. like your top lip pulls back, your eyebrows scrunch together, and there's a slight frown on your lips as they speak. like you look confused/disgusted. but you don't even realise cause-

"why're you pulling that face?" 141

"that's... that's just my focusing face..."

"oh..." 141 feels bad

then when they do take you in feild you're shaking your head no. like you haven't been around that long. what the fuck? now you're bout to infiltrate an enemy base!?!?!

"can i just wait in the car?"

"no." price

"i'm gonna vomit."

"aim at the enemy." ghost

people think that because you're suddenly in this badass task force that surely they're just using you for your assets.

they all think you're the 141 barracks bunny. and maybe you should be pissed or annoyed or grossed out. but all you can do is sigh and pause from the burger price got you, and let out a long exhale.

"fuck... maybe i can just do onlyfans or be a pornstar... shit maybe it's not too late..."

"military is bascially sex work - selling my body..."

"not that different from what i'm doing now. body being used, check. body sore in the strangest places, check."

your tone so empty, blank and nonchalant, but there's a serious look in your eyes that when you grab your phone out to maybe do a little research on how you could do that, your phone is snatched from your hand by one of the guys and they walk out the room without a second look back.

with an annoyed huff, you go back to eating your burger. but suddenly, you turn to the person who genuinely thought you were a barracks bunny.

"hey you think if i be a barracks bunny i get out of missions and shit?"

"...that's not how it works..." rando.

"fuck."

and maybe you try...

like you go to price's office and the guys are already in there, chatting about something that you should really pay attention too but you can't be assed. instead you unashamedly start to speak...

"if i suck ya'll dicks can i get out the mission?"

"no. you still have to join." gaz says amused

"even if you-" *que long sigh from price* "even if you suck our dicks."

"that's fucked up. i should've done porn."

and with the most hurt and broken-hearted look on your face, you leave the office, closing the door with a dramatic sigh. the guys just stare at the door in... confusion, amusement, and maybe arousal if ya'll dig that

idk man just gimmie more soldier!reader who just really ain't the fucked, there for money, lowkey hungry and doesn't know what the fuck is happening. kinda a pet or little sibling energy that the 141 love.

bonus*

"wait so they aren't sucking our dicks?" *soap says getting slapped in the back of the head by ghost

a/n: brain is rottinnggg. i should be doing so much other shit but... cod just consumes my brain 24/7

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textmel8r · 11 hours

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[ DRABBLE ] 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐄 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 ! ( fourth installment ) in which you are forced to plan a corporate event with your office enemy .

୨୧˚ part; one. two. three. four.

୨୧˚ incl; kento nanami

୨୧˚ cw; smut (?) , alcohol consumption , profanity

( flashback; ) Wreaths and holly plants decked the usually barren, white walls of the seventh floor office level, and soft Christmas music looped on the overhead speaker in attempts to induce a jolly spirit. Colleagues conversed, discussing plans for December break over plastic cups of spiked cider. Everyone seemed in high morale; even Gakuganji, who donned a cheaply made Santa suit, still wrinkled from its time being folded in a package. Your first ever office party was about as much as you expected–not the worst time, but certainly not the best time, either. It didn’t help that you were still technically the “newbie” despite having been a member of the company for a few months at that point. Man, it was hard to make friends in an office full of stoic suits.

You remain near a far wall, slumped against the oversized copy machine with a drink in hand. Nobody had even appreciated your dress; a modest crimson thing with white, cottony trims to mimic Old Saint Nick. Figures. You pout into your cup, knocking back a heavy swig.

“Woah-ho, you sure went all out.”

The dialogue was unexpected and you sputter on a swallow of liquor, startled. A preemptive hand pats your back, something like a mother trying to burp a newborn. You swallow your spit at last, recollect yourself, and whip your head up to follow the source of the voice that nearly killed you. There stood a man tall and spindly in his stature with the most beautifully long, goldish hair drawn back into a ponytail. He is dressed down, wearing a simple pair of dark jeans and a sweater in favor of the suits nearly everyone else sported.

“You shouldn’t sneak up on ladies,” comes your meager reply. Your free hand smooths down the skirt of your dress, and you clear your throat. “You scared the shit out of me.”

The man smiles apologetically. “Ah, I noticed. My bad.”

“It’s okay. Just… just don’t do it again.”

“Roger that.” He has his own drink, and you manage to catch a glimpse of it over the rim of the solo cup. It’s a dark, murky color, much more amberish than the cider that was being served. “I haven’t seen your face around before, it made me curious.”

“I secured a position here during spring.” Now that you think about it, he was unfamiliar to you as well. You would have definitely remembered that ponytail. “Are you–I mean, do you work in this building?”

He shakes his head. “Nah, they got me holed up in the Shibuya location,” he winks, leaning in. “I make it a habit to come to all the office parties, though. I can’t resist a little holiday cheer.” Two bony knuckles move to brush delicately against the trim of your dress. “I’m Haruta Shigemo, and you’re…?”

“Not interested.”

Shigemo juts his bottom lip out. “C’mon, don’t be like that. I can’t know your name?”

Holding an index finger to your chin, you pretend to think about it. “What will you give me in return?”

A smirk worms its way onto Shigemo’s thin lips. He angles his hip toward you and pulls up the hem of his knitted sweater, gesturing to the uncanny flask half sticking out of his jeans’ pocket. “I brought good stuff,” he sings quietly, away from prying ears, and suddenly you understand the reason for his drink being a couple shades too dark. “And I’m good at sharing.”

Yeah, maybe it wasn’t the wisest decision to accept unknown liquor from a virtual stranger, you should’ve really considered all of the possible outcomes to this situation. You’d already had a little over two cups of warmed cider, rotating on the axis between tipsy and full on drunkenness. Your foggy brain didn’t care much to think about how some of this so-called “good stuff” would only lead to an inevitable, total inebriation. Or, a less likely but just as concerning scenario, Shigemo’s flask could be chock full of poison. Either way, you were itching to turn a less-than-okay party experience into a fun one.

“Y/n L/n,” you said finally, and Shigemo looks pleased. Strategically as to not give away the secret, he stood before you and widened his shoulders to create a makeshift cover while he poured a solid few glugs from flask to your cup. Immediately, the booze reeks of something strong like industrial glass cleaner. Your nose wrinkles as the stench singes the hair from your nostrils. “Smells fucking rancid.”

“Maybe you’re just not used to top shelf liquor?” Was that a dig? You’ll show him that you’re plenty accustomed with expensive booze (you’re not. not at all).

So you drank it. The taste of piss mixed with vinegar nearly made you retch, but after your second glass and an assload of determination, it started to taste… good? Maybe this Shigemo guy wasn’t too bad. The rest of the night was a blur of silly dancing to dumb Christmas songs, ugly laughing at the horse calendars pinned to the wall, and… well, the bathroom.

“We shouldn’t be doing this.” Your tone was breathy, a cross between giggly and pure apprehension. There in the men’s restrooms, you were perched up on the sink counter. That festive dress was slipped up around your hips by two slender, greedy hands, and a tiny waist worked between your thighs. Shigemo kissed you into silence.

“Why not?” He kisses you again, fumbling with his belt buckle. He’s nipping down your neck, whispering, “The risk is so fucking hot.”

And oh goodness, was he a man on a mission. Tearing the collar of your dress down beneath your breasts, fingering holes into your sheer stockings, stuffing a fist inside your panties… You were in no state of coherence to stop him.

Had it not been a professional obligation on his part to attend this year’s Christmas party, Nanami finds himself fantasizing about all the ways he’d much rather be spending this brisk winter evening. Probably soaking in his tub, nursing a glass of red wine and working on that book he’d been putting off thanks to the ungodly amount of work on his plate as of late. Then, he’d exercise those cooking skills he seldom had time to use and prepare a meal that had much more to offer than these feeble, sugary snacks at this party. Seriously? Cookies and cake? They were adults for goodness sake.

The floor was stuffy and claustrophobia-inducing. Everywhere he turned, Nanami was accidentally bumping somebody with his shoulder or his elbow or some other limb he lost track of. And the conversations were abysmal. Nanami has always been good with his words—he had to be in a profession like this—but Christ, talking to his zombies-for-coworkers was a worse fate than death itself. They drone on about office assignments, about deadlines and paperwork with no hint of light behind their eyes. Is that what he looks like to others? A worrisome thought, that Nanami was just as much of a slave to the corporate world as they were.

The deep train of thought is cut off before it spirals when red catches his eye. A dress red as rubies sticks out like a sore thumb among the sea of blacks and blues and grays of suits. You’re dressed in a silly get up, like those Mrs. Claus actresses in the malls that take pictures with children. Y/n L/n, Nanami recalls your name. He knows you, the newest employee in the office. He’s had very few chances to speak with you, and when he did it mostly consisted of him relaying orders from Mr. Gakuganji. But even in those brief instances, Nanami saw it plain as day: you were different. The first lively fool he’d seen in a while, eyes still glinting with the prospects of optimism and naive hope for the future. Foolish indeed, but he couldn’t bring himself to hate it. You were a breath of fresh air, but Nanami knew that it was only a matter of time before you were beaten and battered into another mindless cog in the corporation's machine.

A strange urge bloomed within the hollows of the man's chest; an urge that told him to initiate communication with you. Perhaps just a "hello" at the very least, seeing as you were his direct subordinate. It was the polite thing to do, right? Or maybe that was just a weak excuse he convinced himself of because Nanami didn't want to admit that you intrigued him in every sense of the word. You would provide an interesting back and forth, something Nanami desperately craved in the throes of this tedious party.

Golden eyes scanned the room. But no matter how long and meticulous he stared into the mass of bodies, Nanami could not locate the shade of red that had incited this search to begin with. There was a muted pit of disappointment the settled heavy in his stomach when he came to the realization that you simply were gone. He didn't doubt the probability that you ditched, no, he'd commend you for doing something he could not. Nanami sighs under his breath, lets his shoulders droop, and takes the last swig of his drink (water of course, the spiked cider was much too sweet for his tastes) before maneuvering through the crowd towards the bathroom. A five minute breather alone in a stall sounded like Heaven on Earth.

He shouldered through the metallic door, eyes closed, fingers tugging the knot of his too-tight tie as he stepped inside the restrooms. Only the sound of a feminine gasp was what pried his heavy eyelids open.

All three bodies froze: Nanami by the entrance with a slack jaw and wide eyes, a man he vaguely recalls from the Shibuya district stood between a pair of opened legs with his jeans tugged down to mid-thigh, and you. You, with you stupidly red dress in disarray, the neckline dipped below your bare breasts and the lower hem bunched up around the curve of your waistline. There you were, sitting up on the sink completely exposed... God, that bastard's hand was still buried down the front of your panties.

As if time suddenly unfroze, said bastard rips his hands away from your most delicate parts in favor of pulling his jeans back up. Nanami blinks once before cocking his head to the side at the unnatural speed of light, focusing on the faux plant in the corner, the uneven tiles beneath his dress shoes, the cracks in the eggshell paint on the wall... anything besides your indecent self.

"Whoops, would ya' look at that?" Shibuya fucker laughs halfheartedly as he fumbles with the button on his jeans, flustered and giggly. "Guess we got a little carried away there, my bad man!" He slinks towards the door, towards Nanami, but pauses. "Hey, you're Nanami Kento, right?"

"Yes." It's a cold response. Nanami doesn't look to the other man, instead he keeps his eyes trained down as to not get another eyeful of you.

"Aha right! Well," Shibuya fucker sweatdrops, clasping a hand over Nanami's shoulder. "Let's keep this a secret from the higher ups?"

The elder grimaces. "Please don't touch me."

The hand is ripped away. Shibuya fucker shows his palms in sort of a defensive stance as more anxious chuckles erupt from his throat. "Good seeing you, then!" And with that, he slips out of the bathroom leaving you high and dry. The prick didn't even bother to stay and help you get recollected.

"I'm decent." You sound meek, a tone Nanami has yet to hear from you thus far. It sounds small. Humiliated. "You... you can look now."

So he does, only to regret it. There you are, hopped off the sink and standing before him in a pitiful display. Your slender neck was tainted with love marks, darkened bruises bit into flesh with little artistry. Your stockings were shredded carelessly, bits of plumpness squishing through the holes. Your hair was mussed, forehead sweaty, lipstick smeared and... why was Nanami so irritated by the sight?

"What..." He starts, trying to find the words. "What is the matter with you?"

You gawk. "Nothing."

"Nothing." Nanami scoffs, hands pressed to his hips. "How careless could you possibly be? Fucking at a work event? I mean, for fuck's sake Y/n."

"I'm sorry, okay?" Your words are clipped. As if you have any right to catch an attitude with him right now.

"Sorry doesn't change the fact that you..." His sentence trails off into a tiny, frustrated growl scratching from the back of his tongue. The man takes his nose bridge between his thumb and forefinger. "The door was unlocked. Anyone could've walked in and saw you like that!" Exposed. Bare. Vulnerable.

"I don't know what else you want to hear other than sorry." Nanami doesn't miss the microscopic vocal crack in the word sorry. You hug yourself tight, forearms crossed over your chest. Your shoulders stutter, and your lips are sucked between your teeth to hide the wobble in them. "I'm... sorry."

You dress strap hangs off your shoulder. Nanami can't peel his gaze away from the strip of fabric. He takes a slow step in, gauging your reaction to it. You don't show any signs of discomfort, so he advances closer. The red strap is dainty against his rough fingers, so he cautions himself to be extra gentle when slipping it back up into place.

"Thanks," you sniffle.

He shushes you. Nanami isn't done yet, far from it. You still look disheveled and sad and weepy and he can't fucking stomach it for some ungodly reason. So he gets to work, first wetting a paper towel in the bathroom sink—the same one you'd been getting groped on a mere few minutes prior—and gingerly swipes away the smeared makeup from your kiss-swollen lips. Then, he's taking it upon himself to straighten out your hair. You let him stroke down your baby hairs without pushback, limply letting him rearrange your appearance as if you were some sort of life sized doll.

Nanami steps back to admire his work. The evidence of foreplay was nearly gone, save for the dreadful state of your stockings and those ugly teeth-shaped indents down the side of your neck. “Take those stockings off before you leave the bathroom,” he utters. “They look…” Slutty is the word that comes to mind first, but he’d never say it aloud. So he leaves it at that.

You’re looking at him with an unreadable expression. If anything, Nanami discerns a little concern in the way your brows turn upwards. “Are you going to tell anyone about this?”

He wants to oh so bad. To be the lame tattletale and snitch to Mr. Gakuganji because fraternization is wrong, and fraternization in the workplace is double wrong. “I should report you,” there’s a pregnant pause, “but I won’t.”

Why? He asks himself.

You seemed to have read his thoughts. “Why?”

Nanami doesn’t have an answer to that. Where is this slice of mercy coming from? All he knows for certain is that staring at the trembling woman in front of him any longer will have him blow a fuse. “Go home, Y/n.” It’s the last thing he offers before turning on his heel and walking back out into the Christmas function, swallowing down each and every confusing feeling swirling around his brain.

likes and reblogs are appreciated !

tags . • @justbelljust @amnmich @ti-mame @silkija @maddietries @vyntagei @ebrysteria @aesukuni

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 day

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AITA for being mad and getting snippy about PDA? I know it’s double barreled, but average the two.

My brakes went out. Out out. Pedal hit the floor. $3,000 later, and I won’t have my car for at least another week. Help is coming soon (borrowing a family’s car), but until then the walk to or from work is an hour long. I’m not broke but everybody’s three months from homeless and I’m out here struggling as a student. My car breaking down has been the last straw for me, and I’m unfortunately shutting down in big ways.

My roommate Guy has been historically so overwhelmed by anxiety that he’s been really cruel and selfish in times of stress (anyone’s stress.) Things are improving, but my temper is short on my best days, and he knows. A line of communication we’ve opened up when I ask for his help with literally anything is to try and get around the parts of DBT DEARMAN (iykyk) that aren’t serving us and focus on a) a definitive answer b) THEN make moves to compromise or qualify our answer. I asked him for a ride home tonight, and he said he and his partner were going to drink together that night (so he wouldn’t) but offered to help me tomorrow. That’s fine. Or, is it? It feels like a dick move to PLAN to drink instead… especially when he’s not supposed to drink on his medication. When the roles have been reversed (it’s never been exactly the same, he’s never experienced bad car failures, but my love language is helping), I have taken care of things for him and his S/O (who doesn’t drive.) I feel kind of hurt, but like I can’t be mad.

Here’s where it gets weird. I walk home. It takes me a second hour because I walked slow and took some backways. I have a big lonely spiral and I’m in tears all over hell and highway. I get home, and they’re snuggling on our couch. I HATE PDA. It makes me feel Horrible and lonely and unloveable… and it’s a non-negotiable if I want to have an OK time. They know that. I immediately comment on it rudely (trust me that it was rude; I have ADHD and the depression brain fog is real and I have no clue what I actually said) they come back with “we’re just sitting here 👁️👄👁️” and then I disappear to shower.

They’re both deeply anxious people, which compounds the guilt. I know they dread me coming home (Guy told me so at one point… literally said that) because of my irritability after twelve hour days as a grad student in a high-burnout field, and I let them down again today. What do y’all think, AITA?

#aita #am i the asshole

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dinogoofymutated · 1 day

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Hi!! I LOVE your Remy hcs! They were so sweet and in character 😊 I'm on my period and ya girl is suffering and I keep thinking that Remy would be the sweetest AND totally amazing in the fried food department 👀 Any hcs? Totally chill if nah

Gambit/AFAB!reader!- Period HCS YES!!! just yes. absolutlely. I want to taste this man's cooking so bad but I am ridiculously sensitive to spice and would probably die.

I have a similar req for Nightcrawler as well so keep an eye out for that one too ;) Sorry that this is a little short!

TWS: Menstrual cycles. Cramps. Menstrual cravings. Damn I'm hungry rn ngl. Can be read as GN as no pronouns are mentioned.

If cooking Isn't one of Remy's love languages I'm calling bull!!

I mean, who else would go out of their way to cook beignets for breakfast? I mean, sure, he could have made the dough beforehand but seriously that shit takes time.

I 100% believe he would go out of his way to make you anything you were craving on your period. Fried chicken? Done. Beignets? Obviously. Done! Hell, you want stuffed french toast but every time you try to make it you fail miserably? Don't worryyy! He's got you.

Although, that doesn't mean he does it for free!! He asks for payment via smooches and love. He tends to stray away from period sex until he knows you're comfortable with it, and if you are comfortable with it he's always there to offer his assistance if you need an all natural pain killer ;)

Mother nature fucking sucked. It wasn't enough that you had to deal with blood leaking out of you every month, but debilitating cramps on top of that? Straight bullshit!

You've been cocooned under your blankets all morning, curled up into a fetal position as you delt with the intense cramps. You've already taken the last of the painkillers you kept in your bedside table, and unfortunate for you, they were not working. You know you've certainly missed breakfast by now, but you just hurt too much to get up. You're face down on your pillow when there's a quick knock at your door before it opens.

"Good morning, Chère~" Remy sings. You cant really respond to him other than giving him a tired hum. You hear the door shut behind him before the sound of him placing a plate on your bedside table.

" 'Figured you weren't feeling well when you weren't at the table, so I've brought you the Gambit special." He jokes. You feel the bed shift with his weight as his sits next to you, running his hand up and down your back soothingly.

"Thanks Rem." You mumble. If only you could bring yourself to sit up. You can smell the sweet scent of the beignets he had brought you, and it makes your stomach growl loudly. You wince as another wave of pain hits you coincidentally, and you're absolutely sure your body was planning to kill you.

" S' pretty bad, huh?" Remy asks, a comforting hand brushing the hair out of your face. You nod.

"Alright, c'mere." You don't have a chance to refuse as Remy is sitting you up, making space so he can sit against your headboard. You're blearily blinking your eyes open as he drags you into his lap, propping you up against his chest. You send him a groggy, questioning look, but he only responds with catching you in a chaste kiss.

"What? You didn't think I was gonna let my favorite person suffer alone, did you?" He asks, sending you a smile that you can't help but return. Remy feeds you your breakfast like that, keeping you snug and safe between his arms as he gives you plenty of kisses and rubs your lower stomach through each wave of pain. Those painkiller never did kick in, but at least you had someone sweet to distract you for a while.

#x men 97 #x men #x men comics #x men headcannons #x men 97 x reader #remy lebeau #gambit #x men gambit #gambit imagine #gambit x reader #remy lebeau headcanons #remy lebeau headcannons #remy lebeau imagine #remy lebeau x reader #x men remy lebeau

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mysteryshoptls · 1 day

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SSR Epel Felmier - Platinum Jacket Vignette

"Happy 100th Anniversary"

[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]

Epel: I'd been hearin' this place was just some fancy museum, 'cept it's way huger 'n I thought.

Epel: We ain't got a museum back home, so… Seein' all these paintin's hangin' 'bout's just crazy!

???: Look at that apple, it's so red and shiny! Totally looks photo-worthy ♪

Epel: Ah, Cater-san! Yeah, it's a really beautiful apple, huh. Although, it's pretty hard to get them this red even with a ton of effort.

Cater: Eh, really? Epel-chan, you sure know your apples ♪

Epel: Ehehe, that's because I'm from a family of apple farmers. I don't think anyone knows more than me when it comes to apples!

Cater: I see～

Cater: Y'know, the queen here looks like she's talking with the crow as she offers it the apple. What do you think she's saying?

Cater: Since even someone well-versed in the world of apples like you thought it's a great looking one, thinking she's saying something like, "Doesn't it look delicious?"

Epel: Nah. I think she's saying, "It's not for you!"

Cater: Eh! So mean!

Epel: Well, yeah!! Like, back home, we'd always have crows trying to nab our apples…

Epel: They'd damage them, poke holes in them, drop them half-eaten on the ground…

Epel: I can't stand them for treating our delicious apples like that!!

Epel: It'd be bad if we couldn't ship out our apples, so the village would band together every year to try to keep them crows out.

Cater: THE WHOLE VILLAGE!? Must be a pretty touch sitch. What kinda stuff do you do to get rid of them?

Epel: We'd put up nets, or make noises that the crows wouldn't like… And a bunch of other stuff.

Epel: But those guys are pretty smart, so we can only get rid of them for a short time… They always come back once they realize they're not in danger.

Epel: That's why whenever them crows came back, I'd jump on my broom and hoot 'n holler while chasing after them!

Cater: You'd hoot and holler while chasing after them!? Based on how petite you look, I couldn't imagine you doing something like that…

Epel: If I don't give them a good scare, they'll just keep coming back.

Epel: A few of the crows were more persistent, so I'd get worried that I'd run out of magic while trying to chase them.

Epel: But, thanks to all that, in the end, whenever I was in the orchard, the crows wouldn't come anywhere near it!

Cater: Pretty amazing of you to scare away all those annoying crows that had the whole village in a bind ♪

Epel: Eheheh, thank you.

Cater: If we're talking about when you were back home, that means this all happened before you came here, right? So basically, would you say you're a pretty good flier, Epel-chan?

Epel: Yep! The guys in the Magical Shift club'll praise me up and down for being able to chase down erratic discs.

Cater: Niiice, all your experiences with those crows are probably coming in handy, then.

Epel: Oh, when you put it that way, I guess so…!

Epel: I thought they were just a pain in my side, but… Those crows were useful in their own way too, I guess?

[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]

Cater: This painting… It's a scene from the tales of the kind-hearted princess. Ahh, a nighttime date on a magical flying carpet is so romantic ♪

Epel: Is that what this is? Oh, the magic carpet is holding something. Is this… a flower?

Epel: It's really drawn so lifelike. It looks like it was just freshly picked…

Cater: Ahaha. So I take it you're more interested in fresh flowers than a romantic date, Epel-chan?

Epel: I-I mean, when weeds are pulled out, they shrivel up pretty fast…

Epel: And even cut flowers need to be put into a vase as soon as possible, or it loses its vibrancy.

Cater: Really? Looks like you're just as in the know about plants as you are with apples.

Epel: Ehehe. I'm studying really hard right now so that I can be more useful to my village whenever I head back home.

Epel: I've been working on potions that'll keep plants from withering, or help them grow…

Epel: Recently, I've been growing my own plants so I can test my potions on them.

Epel: I panicked a bit when one of the pots broke when I was in the middle of testing out a new potion…

Cater: Eh!? You saying that it grew crazy fast, or something!?

Epel: Oh, no, no! I can't make potions that great yet, or with any effect, really…

Epel: Basically, it just fell because one of my roommates bumped their hand into it while they were getting ready for class.

Cater: Did you get hurt at all? It'd be bad if our cute little Epel-chan got injured!

Epel: Cute…!? …Urgh, yes, I was fine.

Epel: I had to clean up the broken pot and scattered dirt, so I was more worried about being late to class.

Epel: I planned on hitting up the school store afterwards to get another pot, since I didn't have any spares…

Epel: But Jack-kun, my classmate, shared one of his spare pots! I was able to move my plant into that one right away.

Cater: Hm? Why did Jack-kun…? Oh, right. He raises cacti, right?

Epel: Yeah! How did you know?

Cater: I remembered him posting a picture of a cactus on Magicam once. There wasn't any description, so I didn't really get what the picture was supposed to be of at first…

Epel: That must have been the cactus that Jack-kun's been growing, yeah.

Epel: He really tries to take good care of it, and had spare pots laying around.

Epel: So, when I said I broke my own plant's pot, he gave one to me, saying it was in return for some apples I gave him once.

Epel: Cater-san, are there are plants that you take care of?

Cater: Hmmm, I mean, there's a ton of plants in my dorm. But I don't think I'd ever really get around to raising some myself.

Epel: Yeah, it really takes time and effort to raise plants.

Epel: That's why it feels double awesome whenever the plant's flowers bloom or fruit grow!

[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]

Epel: Oh hey, it's a painting of the Queen of Hearts! Both she and the animals on her shoulder look pretty proud of themselves.

Cater: It says that this is a painting depicting the scene where the Queen of Hearts had just secured her victory in a croquet match.

Cater: According to legend, the Queen of Hearts was able to hit shots that just curved right into the hoops.

Epel: Shots that curved right into the hoops!? I can't even do that when I aim for them… She's awesome!

Cater: Oh, so you've played croquet before?

Epel: Yes! Last weekend, Ace and Deuce asked me to help them practice.

Epel: Grim-kun and [Yuu]-san also joined us. It was supposed to just be practice, but we kinda ended up playing an actual match…

Epel: Hehe, we really got into it then.

Epel: By the time we finished the game, we were all so hungry. So we all just went to Foothill Town to eat.

Cater: Niiice～ Ah, so young and carefree. And let me guess, you guys went to a hamburger joint?

Epel: Eh, how did you know!?

Cater: When it comes to a joint in town that's affordable even for students, I can't really think of anything much other than that chain restaurant～

Epel: Oh yeah, Ace-kun said something like that too. But it's not like I knew of the restaurant before I came to Sage's Island.

Cater: Are you more the type to avoid fast food hamburger joints?

Epel: I wouldn't say I avoid them… It's a bit of a car ride to get to their closest chain back home, so I haven't had much opportunity to go, is all.

Cater: Oh wow. I totally thought they had a place set up pretty much everywhere, since it's even on this remote island.

Epel: Yeah… When I told Ace-kun and Deuce-kun, they were pretty surprised as well.

Epel: Until those two told me, I didn't even know that they did free refills at this restaurant...

Cater: Hm? I mean, I don't think it's just that one joint that does that, but the whole chain.

Epel: Eh, you mean that's not something only here at Sage's Island!?

Epel: Then that means I could have had free refills in the restaurant I went to back home… I didn't know at all.

Epel: What a waste, I'd only ever get one drink whenever I'd go. I'll have to let my family know next time I head back home.

Cater: Yeah, yeah. Whenever there's free refills, it's so easy to just lounge there forever, too～

Epel: Yeah! And that day, we got really caught up in conversation that it started to get dark… We had to hurry back to campus.

Cater: Oh, I see, I see. Well, thanks for getting along with my little freshie brethren.

Epel: What, you don't need to thank me! I had a ton of fun hanging with them.

Epel: Ah, wait, I'm sorry, I've kept you here a while now!

Cater: Don't worry about it, I was happy to chat with you ♪ I think I'll head off to the museum's café now.

Cater: I heard their menu is themed after the various exhibits here, so. See ya around, Epel-chan.

Epel: Right, see ya. …Well, Vil-san told me to learn a thing or two about beauty while I'm here, so I guess I'll go look around for a painting of the Fairest Queen.

Epel: Oh hey, there's another painting with an apple on it! This one looks really tasty, too.

Epel: Oh yeah, I remember when I was a kid, I heard the story of how the Fairest Queen cast her magic on apples, and would try to pretend to do the same.

Epel: And I'd chant… "Now, turn red. Tempt anyone and everyone to make them hunger for a bite…"

Requested by Anonymous.

#twisted wonderland #twst #epel felmier #cater diamond #twst epel #twst cater #twst translation #twst birthday #mention: jack #mention: ace #mention: deuce #mention: grim #mention: yuu #mention: vil

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dark-frosted-heart · 1 day

Text

Crown’s S Class Mission - Roger Barel (Part 2)

As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this.

Kate: Aaah. No…I can’t anymore, Instructor…Roger.

Roger: Keep going…your body can still handle it right?

Kate: Ah… No, not anymore…

Roger: When you think you can’t take it anymore, that’s when it actually starts. Same thing in bed. Come on, 10 more sit ups.

Kate: Why are you talking about doing things in bed? You’re absolutely the worst!

Instructor Oliver: Oh, is something the matter?

Roger: No, Miss Kate wants me to be stricter.

(......Excuse me?)

Roger: 10 more sit ups. Muscle, muscle!

Kate: Muscle…muscle…Ugh…

(It’s no use, if I do a bad job, I’ll look suspicious)

Roger put his lips to my ear as I desperately tried to do sit ups…

Roger: Maybe the ‘S’ in S class mission stands for ‘sadist’?

Kate: …Eh?

Roger: Hey, you stopped. Come on, muscle, muscle!

(D-damn it!)

Kate: Haaa…haaa… So…did you find anything?

Roger: Nah, haven’t “heard” anything suspicious yet. I’ll keep an ear out ‘til I get a lead.

Instructor Oliver: Roger, a moment!

Roger: Yeah, I’m coming over.

Roger: Keep digging. Stay on guard, Kate.

With a nod, Roger went to where Instructor Oliver called him.

(I’m thirsty. I’ll get a glass of water)

Kate:Huh, where’s the drinking fountain…?

Blonde lady: Excuse me, I can show you where it is.

I turned toward the voice and saw a dignified lady smiling at me.

After being shown where the fountain was, the rigorous training continued—

I snuck outside.

(No one will come out here, right? I’ll just take a short break and then head back in)

Maybe it was because I’m not used to doing hard exercises, but my knees were about to give out.

???: Who’s this student skipping class?

Kate: Eek! I’m sorry! I won’t slack off anymore!

Roger: Haha. Dummy, it’s me.

Kate: Roger… Geez, don’t scare me like that!

Roger: Sorry, sorry. I’ll give you something nice as an apology, so open your mouth. Say ‘aah’.

Kate: Huh, mmm. It’s sweet… Is it chocolate?

Roger: You look like a sad puppy.

(You were strict with me, and now you’re spoiling me…)

Perhaps Roger often tames using a carrot and stick.

That’s really, really annoying…

Kate: Oh yeah, I made a friend just then. Her name’s Emilia Winslow. She told me that her dream’s to go into politics.

Roger: That’s an insane dream when you know women don’t have the right to vote.

Kate: Yeah…She mentioned that. She wanted to get out of her current situation, but didn’t know how. So she came to the club in desperation. She thought that if she got stronger, she’d be able to change her absurd situation.

Roger: The women who gathered here all want to get stronger and fight.

As his amber eyes looked up to the sky, a question I wanted to ask suddenly popped in my mind.

Kate: Roger, have you ever wanted to get stronger?

Roger: I have. It’s not like I’ve been like this since I was born. When I was a kid, I had my first friend. He was cursed. But because I was weak, I betrayed him in the worst way. I couldn’t protect him.

(This is the first time I’ve heard something about Roger’s past…)

It felt like his eyes, still focused on the sky, wavered for a moment.

Roger: Maybe I’ve always been fighting something?

Seeing that smile on his face, as if he were trying to laugh away the pain, reminded me of what Roger told me that time I fired a gun at someone for the first time.

(At the time, I hated myself for being weak…What Roger said…)

“People who want to get stronger and are able to continue on are really the strong ones.”

When I first met Roger, I thought he was “just a strong guy”.

However, now I can clearly see that he’s someone that “tries to be strong”.

—Suddenly, Roger’s eyes became sharp.

Roger: …

Kate: …Roger?

Roger: Oy…who’s there? I can hear your heartbeat.

Instructor Oliver: …

(What do we do…? If he finds out that Roger and I know each other…)

Instructor Oliver: I’m sorry for eavesdropping… Will you please hear me out?

Somehow Oliver had a feeling that we were different from those that visited the Beauty Muscle Club.

So he followed us—to ask for help.

Instructor Oliver: In the beginning, I was just an instructor working at the club. But then I uncovered something unthinkable about this place… The owner of the club and master of the estate belongs to the House of Lords. He has an extremely distorted view on women’s empowerment.

Roger: Does this have anything to do with the fact that women who visit here end up ill?

Instructor Oliver: How did you…Just who are you people?

Roger: That doesn’t matter now. Are the women here getting drugged?

Instructor Oliver: Illegal drugs disguised as muscle-enhancement drugs.

Kate: Why…that’s so ridiculous.

Roger: It’s to stop brilliant and strong women from entering the workforce, isn’t it? So stupid. Even though they were tricked into it, they took the enhancement drug. And now the women are afraid to speak out in fear of being accused of taking illegal substances. And so the truth doesn’t come out.

Kate: …Such a cowardly way of operating.

Instructor Oliver: I don’t want to do this. But they threatened to kill me if I ran away.

He looked like a little kid with how he weakly hung his head, face pale.

(We can’t overlook this evil)

Kate: …Roger, I have a request. I—

Roger: Don’t do anything reckless that’ll put yourself in danger, okay?

Kate: Okay!

—Then, Oliver and I went to where the illegal drugs were being sold.

The person who welcomed us was a man from the House of Lords, the wonder of the club and estate.

After Oliver introduced me, the man handed me a small bag of medicine with a friendly look on his face.

(...I got the evidence. All I need to do now is leave)

(But…)

Master of the estate: This will make you stronger and more beautiful. Let us build a better society.

The way he so easily lied filled me with rage.

Kate: …These are illegal drugs.

Instructor Oliver: ?!

As if he caught on, the master of the estate’s eyes turned terribly cold.

And he smiled cooly.

Master of the estate: Britain thriving, but with that, comes women getting louder… Give them the right to vote, give them places to work. Women are inferior creatures to men who are just clever enough to serve.

Kate: So, why would you do such a despicable and foolish thing?

Master of the estate: If I don’t pluck the useless weeds, then who will?

Kate: There are a lot of women trying to get stronger, you know?

Master of the estate: And for what reason, when it’s all in vain?

(Oh my god…)

I slapped the man before me as hard as I could.

Master of the estate: …You’re a woman! I can have you killed for this you know!

Kate: …

Before I could get the gun from my garter belt, a gunshot rang out and a bullet grazed the man’s cheek.

The window behind the man broke and Roger, with his hunting rifle, bursts into the room.

Roger: Hold up. Not gonna let you kill my cute student. Now then, it’s time for Instructor Roger’s fun and exciting punishment.

*House of Lords is the upper chamber of UK Parliament.

#ikemen villains #ikevil #ikevil jp #ikevil translations #roger barel #ikevil roger

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miniscule-meow · 2 days

Text

Charlie and Felix: Phone Calls

Masterpost Wordcount: ~2k Warnings: lots of swears? First Part | Last Part | Next Part

---

Sitting in her dorm room, she sighs, staring absentmindedly at the ceiling. She is supposed to be focusing on her biology homework, but she keeps replaying her conversation with Felix in her head. So, he transferred from Rosehill University. That’s, like, The number one Supers college. Her brothers all go there. Or, went there. Her two oldest brothers, Elias, and Asher, have both already graduated. Mars is a senior now, and Jeremey, her twin, is a junior. Considering Felix is a junior as well, Jeremy and Mars might have had some classes with him. She pulls out her phone and texts Jeremy.

“Hey. Do you know Felix Westwell?”

“Ya. That guy is a jerk.”

Her brother’s response comes. Shortly after, her phone buzzes again, he adds,

“He got like, expelled lmao”

She replies,

“Nah, he just transferred to Bayshear.”

“??? WTF! Dude that’s crazy. Stay away from him. He’s bad news Frfr” “We have a class together. He seems… nice enough.”

After that message, she immediately gets a phone call.

“Hello—” she starts to answer, but she’s immediately cut off.

“Char, I am so serious. You do not want to mess with that guy,” Jeremy’s loud voice announces as soon as she picks up the phone.

“Okay. Uh, cool. I just wanted to see if you knew him. I’ve had like, a couple of run-ins with him and he—”

“What kind of ‘run-ins’? What does that mean?” He cuts her off again, she rolls her eyes.

“I mean, we have a class together. We did a group project, calm down. Aside from that we’ve had like, one conversation,” she can already tell that she does not want to tell him out about her conversation with Felix yesterday. “He mentioned he transferred from Rosehill. I didn’t ask him about you though, he didn’t really want to talk about school.”

“Yeah, no shit!” Jeremy barks a laugh, “He got his ass expelled.”

“So, you weren’t like friends or anything then," she states.

“Friends,” Jeremy scoffs, “Yeah, absolutely not. Did you know he put Mars in the school infirmary for two weeks once?”

“Wait- that was because of him?” she asks, her heart sinking. She remembers that happening. It was late last year. Mars ended up being fine, thanks to the healers, but it was a really scary time. Apparently, that’s just sort of the nature of the school. When you’re strong enough, it’s common that other students will try to challenge that.

“Yeah man, he’s fuckin’ volatile.” Jeremy confirms.

Involuntarily, her heart begins pounding. Her mind drifts back to yesterday. Felix’s ability is no joke, she can definitely see that. But it’s crazy to think that the hands that held her yesterday were the same ones that nearly crushed her brother. Not that Felix was particularly gentle with her, not that she’s surprised he’s capable of it. It’s just that she didn’t truly consider how much danger she was in, until now.

“I guess. He definitely seems to have a short temper," she muses.

“To say the least,” Jeremy says with a huff, “It’s starting to sound like you’ve maybe had more than just a couple run-ins, Char. Spill it.”

“You’re going to freak out," she winces.

“I mean, now that you've said that, yeah, I want to freak out. The more you keep stalling, the worse I'm imagining.”

“Promise me that you’ll be chill," she asserts.

“Char,” he sighs.

“Promise!”

“Fine, whatever. I promise I’m going to be so chill about whatever horrible thing you’re about to tell me.”

“Okay so like, he was getting picked on for being a super—”

“Which he deserves,” Jeremey interrupts immediately, she should have put money on that happening. “He like, embodies all the reasons mundanes hate supers.”

“Germ, it was like, really problematic, okay? And besides, the guys messing with him didn’t know he was a super for sure. Anyway,” she begins, before her brother can cut her off again. “He ran off into the woods and I sort of followed him.”

“Charlotte,” he sounds disappointed, “you can’t just follow people into the woods.”

“I want to point out that I didn’t know he was a super at this point.”

“Uh, that’s,” he cuts himself off with an incredulous noise. “That’s so beside the point? Super or not, you shouldn’t just follow people into the woods, period.”

“So anyway,” she says, getting them back on track, “I wanted to check on him, and he showed me his ability. We talked for a while, it wasn’t a big deal.”

“Wait, wait, wait. Run that by me again. He showed you his ability?” He asks, she can already hear the freakout that’s about to happen.

“You said you’d be cool about it!” She reminds him.

“I—” He takes an audibly deep breath, “by ‘showed you his ability’ do you mean that he used it against you?” His voice has a faux sense of calm to it.

“I don’t know that I would describe it like that.”

“Did he touch you, yes or no?” He asks, his voice trembling with a rage she can hear even through the phone.

“It’s not a big deal, Germ," she says, trying to smooth this over.

“Yes or no, Charlotte I’m being so for real right now.”

“Alright, so like only a little bit," she admits, "but I'm really fine. I’m really super fine, I promise—”

“Oh my god!” he explodes. “If I see him again, it is on fuckin’ sight.”

“No! No J, it is not ‘on sight’ do you even hear yourself!”

“Do you hear yourself?” He returns immediately. “Listen, Mars is strong as hell. Did you not hear the part where I said that Felix put him in the infirmary for two weeks. That’s two weeks with advanced healers, dude.”

“Alright, I get it—”

“Do you? Seriously. You should not be putting yourself in these situations! You’re not invincible, Charlotte! I mean, you’re out there all by yourself, you can’t just—I mean, I’m not there, Mars isn’t there, like,” he heaves a frustrated sigh.

“What, Jeremy. You’re not here to protect me?” She can feel herself flash with a hot spark of anger, “Just because I don’t have powers, doesn’t mean that I’m completely helpless!”

“Stop. That’s not what I’m saying, and you know it,” he counters. “I’m saying, the whole point of you going to a mundane school was so you could just be around some normal people for once! But, Of course, you go and find the one super in the whole school. Of course, the one super at your school would be the most dangerous guy I know. Fucking great. I swear, it’s like you look at danger and just think Yeah, that looks friend-shaped, why not!”

“Whatever, Jeremy. Felix and I aren’t even friends! I told you we just had like, one conversation. I—” she huffs, “look, I’ve got a lot of homework to take care of. I’ll talk to you later.”

She hangs up quickly, tossing her phone aside with a frustrated swear.

Jeremy has always been super protective of her. She understands where he’s coming from, and she can’t say that he’s wrong. But still. It’s so frustrating to hear him say it. Yes, she should be more careful. Yes, he’s not here to protect her. Yes, it’s scary that Felix nearly killed her brother, and now here she is, galivanting in the woods with him.

Maybe she has a worse judge of character than she originally thought.

---

“Mr. Westwell, this has been an enlightening session,” his advisor says as they finish their online check-in. It’s what she always says, and it typically means that he’s done a bad job convincing her that he’s, he doesn’t know, normal? He supposes that's what she's looking for. Whatever it is she’s looking to get from him, it would seem as though he hasn’t been able to provide that just yet.

Even when he comes in, trying to answer the questions the way she wants them to be answered, he’s always met with a ‘this has been enlightening.’ She'll take her report back to the school, and he'll be stuck at this mundane college. Theoretically, if he's on his best behavior, eventually Rosehill will accept him back. He doesn't think that's really going to happen.

“One more thing before I leave you, have you made any friends at Bayshear?” She asks.

“With any of the mundanes?” He scoffs, “I hardly see how that’s relevant.”

“Hm,” she says, obviously disappointed. She tilts her head, making a note of that response.

“Well, alright. I’ve made one friend, if it’s that important,” he covers quickly, crossing his arms with a huff. The coordinator pauses. The picture of her on his screen looks up at him over the rim of her glasses.

Great now he needs to think of a believable lie. Or, actually, wait. Maybe it doesn’t need to be a lie. It certainly won’t be the entire truth, but he might actually have something here.

“I met this girl. Her name is Charlotte. I don’t, uh, I don’t know her last name. She’s in one of my gen-ed classes, we were partners on a project.”

“Alright,” the coordinator does not sound terribly impressed. Now that he's heard himself say it out loud, he isn't really impressed either. Felix runs the mental math, trying to figure out if telling her what really happened would be better or worse for his permanent record. She had asked him the story behind his black eye earlier, and he completely fielded the question, changing the subject entirely. Maybe he can actually spin this one though. It's worth a shot.

“Okay, fine. Do you want the story about my eye?” He says, gesturing to his still swollen face, The coordinator takes of her glasses, listening with a raised brow. “I’m not changing the subject, it kind of all goes together,” he sighs. “So these guys were being really obnoxious, and I know you probably won't believe me, but they actually started a fight with me. I swear I was actually trying to de-escalate and everything. But, I mean, long story short,” he gestures again to his face. “Maybe you should put in your notes that I lost a fight to a couple mundanes on purpose. If they were supers that would not have happened. But,” he raises his hands, digressing.

"I went out to the woods nearby to blow off some steam and Charlie- uh, Charlotte, the girl from my class, she followed me. I was like, ‘hey you need to leave,’ because I was going to use my ability, and I obviously didn’t want her there for that. But, she is the most stubborn person I’ve ever met, so did she leave? Of course not. So, I grew, but she didn’t freak out. She was really normal about it. Uh, we," he decides to respectfully omit all the middle parts of the story, "we just, ended up talking. Apparently her brothers go to Rosehill? I don’t know. She also said she wouldn’t tell anyone about my abilities because the mundanes are weird about that sort of thing here. And, anyway. I don’t know. That’s probably a lot of nothing. It’s a new development. But yeah we’re totally friends. Check.”

“Felix, that is…” enlightening. Yeah, whatever. He predicts her next words, but he's surprised when she says instead, “ that is really some great progress. I’m happy to hear that,” she says. He looks up. “I hope to hear more about Charlotte next time, she sounds like she could be a good influence for you.”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah for sure,” he says, and with that the videocall ends. This is great news for him. Charlie is such a social butterfly. And so far, he hasn’t really been able to get her to leave him alone. Maybe he’ll make a friend after all.

#g/t #giant/tiny #writing #g/t writing #g/t community #size shifters #super powers #i'm not going to let myself be a perfectionist about this. i am doing an exercise in consistency #it's been clattering in my brain #the exciting stuff is coming #i just need to stop looking at this #charlie comes from a *loud* family

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littlxpxtal · 3 days

Text

Oxytocin

TYRANTS || STORY MASTERLIST PAIRING: rafe cameron x fem!reader WARNINGS: MDNI 18+ Content, swearing, sexual content, drug and alcohol use, violence WORD COUNT: 2.4K

I wanna do bad things to you

I wanna make you yell

I wanna do bad things to you

Don't wanna treat you well

December Continued

The sound of male voices echo throughout the backyard as Kelce, Topper and Rafe make their way around the back to meet us. I pulled out chairs for them with blankets on each chair.

Topper is carrying a case of beer while Kecle and Rafe follow behind them.

“So this is where the party is.” he asks, a little too loudly for how quiet the neighborhood is.

“Smells loud.” Rafe says, crinkling his nose.

“Hope you got enough for us,” Kelce chimes in, greeting me and Sabrina with a hug. Topper hugs us next and Rafe takes the seat next to me, not acknowledging either of us. I glance at Sabrina and she shrugs her shoulders.

I light up the joint from before, passing it to the boys, while Topper passes out the beer he brought with him.

“So how was Carissa’s” Sabrina asks. Rafe shrugs his shoulder while taking a drag with one hand, cracking open his beer with the other. I watched him from the corner of my eye. He was wearing a dark green hoodie and black jeans. His hair was a mess, probably from him running is fingers through it too much. He passes me the joint and I bring it to my lips.

“Was alright. Ratio was off to begin with. Then some dumbasses got on her roof and her mom called the cops.” Kecle responds

“Yikes” I say, exhaling the smoke into the air, passing to Sabrina.

“Noah was there.” Topper says with a wink. I can practically hear Rafe roll his eyes. He adjusts in his seat and pulls out his phone.

“Whats with you two.” Kelce asks taking a sip from his beer.

“Literally nothing.” I snap. “We studied this week for calc and everyones makin a big deal about it.”

“Jeez Y/N just a question.” Topper says, raising his hands in defense.

“Jus annoying that everyone has something to say. I hang with Pogue’s and everyone talks about me. I hang with kooks and everyone talks about me.” I huff, taking a sip of my beer.

“Seems like thats all anyone is like here in the OuterBanks.” Kelce says, taking a drag of the almost gone joint.

“Can’t wait to get the fuck out of here.” I say under my breath.

“I’ll cheers to that” he says, holding his drink up.

“Yo Y/N can I use your bathroom?” Topper asks.

“Yea me too” Kelce chimes in. Sabrina perks up

“I can show you guys where it is.” she stands and guides them through the back door, leaving me and Rafe alone.

“Did you have a good time at Carissa’s?” I ask without looking at him. He adjusts in his seat again, turning towards me.

“Nah. Shes fuckin annoying.” I roll my eyes and make a face.

“What?” he asks, inching closer.

“Nothin. Just thought y’all were friends or somethin.” I say, remembering the way he brushed her hair back behind her ear in class and all the times I’ve seen her stand at his locker this week.

He shakes his head in response and stares at me. I feel my face flush and I turn back to the fire.

“I like you without makeup.” he finally says after a few moments of silence. I immediately become self conscious, forgetting that I was literally in my pajamas.

“Thanks” I mumble, not looking at him. I feel his eyes still inspecting my face.

“Is Sabrina spending the night” he asks. I finally turn to look at him and shrug.

“Not sure we hadn’t really talked about it. Shes been here since like 7:30 but she lives right down the street so it’s up to her.” he nods in response and faces towards the fire. My eyes are locked on the way his jaw clenches and releases as he thinks.

More moments of silence pass before I hear the footsteps of our friends returning. Sabrina has her bookbag on his shoulders and shes stumbling.

“Hey Y/N think ‘m gonna go home.” I gulp and stare at her.

“You sure you can walk home like this?” I ask, concerned that she would end up going trying to get to Derek’s again.

“Top and Kelce are gonna walk me home.” I raise an eyebrow and look at the two boys hovering behind her.

“Rafe you can come or just chill here, up to you man. I gotta get up hella early for my study group” Kelce says groaning. Top shoves his shoulder and they play fight while Rafe stays staring into the fire.

“I’ll catch up with you guys tomorrow” he finally says. Topper nods his head and slinks his arm around Sabrina, holding her up steady.

“Text me when youre home okay Sab?” I say, standing up to give her a hug.

“You’re such a good friend.” she slurs into my neck. I laugh and kiss the top of her head.

“Get her home safe boys.” I say sternly, giving them a mom look and they salute to me

“Yes ma’am” they say in sync.

I watch them as they walk around the side of the house to the front.

I start to pick up everyones blankets, folding them into squares and putting the chairs back to their appropriate places.

“Lemme help” Rafe finally says, grabbing a hold of the large stack of blankets I just folded. I shut off the fire in then guide him through the back door and point to where the outdoor blankets live next to the extra patio furniture corner of the basement.

“You like Game of Thrones?” I ask, breaking another awkward silence. He finally cracks a smile for the first time that night.

“No but I take you as a girl who loves that fantasy porn shit.” I laugh at his condescending remark and walk over towards my bedroom. He follows silently behind and closes my bedroom door behind him.

The only lights on in my room is the lamp on my nightstand and the glow from the TV. I slip off the hoodie and sweatpants I put on over my pajama set, setting them on my vanity chair.

I crawl onto my bed and Rafe stands at the edge watching me before deciding to take his own hoodie and shoes off, sitting towards the edge. I press play on the episode I left off on when Sabrina and I decided to go outside.

“Alright so this is House Stark, Bran, Robb Arya and Sansa are all children of Catelyn and Eddard Stark. Then Jon Snow is the bastard son of Eddard Stark. They rule the North” I explain as the characters appear.

“Okay buts what with the incest freaks?” he asks, staring intently at the screen.

“Thats Cersei and Jamie Lannister. Technically Cersei is married to King Baratheon but she is in love with her brother, the King Slayer.”

“Why do they call him the King Slayer?”

“He was in the kingsguard for Aerys Targaryen. Swore an oath to protect him and the kingdom. But the king went insane. It was so bad they referred to him as the “Mad King” and Jamie killed him.” his eyes widen and he turns back to the screen.

“This is fucking derranged.” I laugh at his curiousity.

“I knew you’d like it” I said smugly. After a few more scenes Rafe scoots back on the bed, resting his back on my headboard.

Heat raises along my skin at our proximity. I can smell a faint hint of his cologne lingering on him. I stare down at his hands, a gold ring on his index finger that he occasionally plays with. My eyes follow up on his arms, veins protruding on his forearms. His biceps bulge out of his blue shirt. As my eyes make my way up to his face, I find him already looking down at him.

He extends his neck down and gently places his lips against mine. I lean up into the kiss, grabbing his neck with one hand, using my other to push myself up on the bed. He grabs my hips, pulling me onto his lap, my legs straddling the sides of him. I push him into my headboard, our lips moving at a fast pace, heavy breaths exchanged between the two of us.

His hands slip up my top, fondling my boobs with both hands. I groan into the kiss, rutting my crotch against his.

“Whaddya want pretty girl” he whispers into the kiss. I whimper lightly as his fingers pinch my nipples. He takes my open mouth as an opportunity to stick his tongue in, circling erotically around the inside of my mouth. I pull alway to catch my breath, my forehead resting against his.

“I want you.” he smirks at response, pulling my top above my head with a swift motion. We undress each other between kisses and I find myself under him, completely naked.

“Do you have a condom?” he asks.

“What you dont carry them with you? Thought you were at Carissa’s earlier” I say with a snark expression. He rolls his eyes and brings his hand up to grab my face, squeezing my jaw with his hand.

“Answer the question.” My pussy throbs at the feeling of his hand squeezing my face and I shut my eyes.

“Nightstand. Bottom drawer” He releases his grip and leans over the bed opening the drawer.

“Nice toys” he remarks. I internally cringe, feeling embarrassment radiate through my body. “And you have lube. Guess your not as much of a prude as I thought.”

I scoff and lightly push his shoulder.

“What did you think I was a virgin or something?”

He smiles down at the packet and opens it with his teeth, pouring a tiny drop of lube on the tip, rubbing it down his shaft. I watch him intently and he looks back at me as he adjusts himself at my entrance.

“Nah just didn’t know you fucked all like that.”

“I dont” I state, my arms gripping his biceps as he pushes his tip slowly in, stretching me out.

“Fuck” I hiss.

“Obviously not cus you’re tight as fuck.” he groans, dipping his head down to the crook of my neck. He readjusts his angle, lowering down to his forearms, before pushing his entire cock inside. I moan out, louder than I would’ve liked and he chuckles into my neck.

“You feel fucking amazing” he whispers before sucking harshly onto the side of my neck, slowly thrusting himself in and out of my pussy. I wrap my legs up around his waist, nails digging into his arms.

“Fuck Rafe fuck” I cry out. His hand snakes up behind my head, grabbing a fisful of my hair, pushing my head up to meet his, our mouths colliding with passion as he starts to quicken his pace.

The room is filled with the sounds of his skin slapping against mine, my uncontrollable moans and whimpers, his occasional grunts and the TV show in the background.

Our lips disconnect as he pushes himself back up and he pulls my arms off of his, putting them above me, his other hand trailing up to wrap around my throat. He applies light pressure before going back to thrusting inside of me. My eyes roll back, a string of ah, ah, ahs escaping my lips.

He squeezes my throat tighter and leans close to my face.

“Keep your eyes open” he commands. My eyes snap open to meet his, blown out and filled with lust. His tongue is slightly jutted out between his swollen lips, just like he does when hes concentrating in class. I whimper underneath him as I feel myself reaching my climax.

“Rafe ‘m”

“I know pretty girl I can feel you clenching around my fucking dick. feels fuckin awesome.” he says between his heavy breaths. “Go ahead and let yourself go, wanna feel you cum on me.”

Within seconds I let myself come undone beneath him, His hands release from around my neck and he lowers himself down to interlock lips again. I gasp into his mouth as I unravel beneath him, his climax following soon after. We exchange moans between kisses as he sloppily thrusts, riding out his high. I go limp underneath him, in a blissed out daze, watching his face overcome with pleasure.

After regaining his composure, he pulls out and I whimper at the absence of him inside of me. He gets off the bed, throwing the condom into the trashcan and making his way to my bathroom. I watch him as he cleans himself up, just like last time. He wanders around the room looking for his clothes.

“So was this your plan all along?” I ask, pulling my own clothes back on.

“What do you mean?” he asks, pulling his t shirt on.

“Having Top call Sabrina and crashing our girls night.”

“No, my end goal of tonight was not to fuck you.” he states simply, sitting at the edge of the bed to put his shoes back on. “Tops just fuckin obsessed with Sab.” he says in a ushed tone.

“I knew it.” I said, perking up on the bed. “They’d be cute… I think?” I say, pondering the thought.

“How’s that feel, both of your best friends dating the same dude” Rafe says with a sarcastic tone.

“Sarah and Top barely dated. That was like forever ago.” I say, standing up, walking towards him. He grabs his hoodie and scans the room.

“You got any more of those calculators?” he asks, pointing at my desk. I walk over to the desk and pick up the calculator he motioned towards.

“Yea I have two, why?”

“Can I borrow one for my micro exam?” he asks.

“Um sure. Wait, do you not have one?” he takes the calculator from my hand and shakes his head.

“Nah I always stole Top’s before class but we have the exam at the same time.”

“That exams no joke.” I say, remembering the headache I had exiting the final exam last year.

“Yea I’m kinda fucked.” he says with a frown.

“Want some of my notes?” I ask, already rummaging through my drawers. “Here, I made this study packet for myself last year.” Handing him the booklet I made for finals. He flicks throught he pages, eyes widening.

“Holy shit you’re a bigger nerd than I thought.” he says, laughing to himself.

“You want to pass or not?” I ask, placing my hands on my hips.

He looks up and smiles.

“Thanks. I’ll see ya later pretty girl.” he says before walking out of the patio doors.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

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pspaura27-blog · 3 days

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Papa Sukuna!

Because why not?

“Really, dear, I thought you knew how to wrap it before put it in—”

“Kaori!” Jin covers his baby son’s ears scandalously. “We have a baby here!”

“Yes. Yes, and soon to be two babies.”

Sukuna glares but he mostly blames himself for consulting with these two. Still, who else can he talk to? His old man? Yeah. No.

It’s one of those dramas where his hookup from months ago calls to say that she is pregnant and she can’t abort due to her health issue. So, surprise, he is becoming a father.

As if one brat isn’t enough.

Sukuna looks at his 4-year-old nephew, remembering all those stinky diapers and screaming. Just a few months later, he will be stuck with one that can’t be handed off himself…

Yikes.

No, he doesn’t get together with the hookup but he is invested in the baby, showing up at the doctor’s appointment and all.

Sukuna doesn’t cry when he hears that he is having a girl nor does he keep an ultrasound picture in his wallet.

He doesn’t paint a nursery room in pastel pink either.

Sukuna thinks about giving the baby up to his twin. Then, he feels really sick and pretends that it’s not an option.

The baby is born with pink hair and chubby cheeks.

“…I still don’t understand how pink hair is a dominant gene.” Jin mumbles standing in front of the nursery at the hospital. “Aww, look at my niece, aren’t you so cute… Sukuna?”

“…”

“Sukuna, are you crying?”

The baby is adorable with her doe eyes and her button nose. But she has her father’s tamper which means she is one hell of a baby that screams at 3 in the morning then blinks up at Sukuna innocently when he comes to check on her.

Sukuna sleepily picks her up, poking her cheeks. “Brat, you think you so cute, huh?”

The baby blinks, then, impossibly, scowls and chomps on her Papa’s finger with her gum.

“…”

The baby is totally his karma; she spits her milk on his shirt just because, bites his finger when he holds her, screams when he puts her down.

She also throws up on him twice a week randomly.

Screw the ‘sweet daughter and demonic papa’ trope. If the king of curses is going to have a baby, he’s totally totally going to have a bully one that hates his gut.

Sukuna might feel worse if she doesn’t also smack glasses out of Jin’s face and throws her pacifier at Wasuke.

Many also fall victim to her angelic face just to be slapped with her tiny fist.

“She hates everyone.” Jin deadpans. “Just like you.”

Yuuji visits his little cousin for the first time with a bunny plushie for a present. He bounces excitedly while his Daddy knocks on the door to reveal his… messy Uncle.

Jin blinks. “What happened to you?”

“Your niece happens.” Uncle walks back. “That brat throws up on me. On purpose.”

“…she is just two weeks old.”

“And evil.”

Jin doesn’t believe that, of course, he walks inside the nursery and sees his precious niece lying in her bassinet, cooing at her own toes. He coos and picks her up.

“Hello, sweetheart.” Jin rubs her chubby cheeks. “I’m your uncle—”

“Urghk!”

The baby kicks his shin. “Bwahh! A-wahh-nah!”

“Daddy.” Yuuji tucks his shirt. “I no think she like you.”

“…”

Wasuke is peed on when he is changing her diaper. Kaori strategically strays clear of her warpath.

Yuuji loves his little cousin; she is so cute, 8 months old, being dressed in a bunny onesie for Wasuke’s birthday dinner.

Sure, she hits him with her rattle but it’s okay because she doesn’t mean to!

Adults are talking. He sits with his cousin and plays with her, which actually means waving a toy around and bubbling at her. The baby stares at him with wide eyes.

“—and this my fab-bu-wite dinosaur, I go on adventuar togethar and beat’a bad guys—”

“Bwat.”

Yuuji blinks.

The baby scrunches her nose, looking determined, then she says her first word again with much more clearance.

“Brat.” The baby bangs her plushie with the floor. “Brat. Brat. Brat.”

“Whoa.”

She sounds just like Uncle!

Wasuke and Jin turn to look at Sukuna with accusation looks.

“Sukuna!” Jin is horrified. “Are you trying to raise my precious niece into a-a-a Yankee?!”

The older twin grumbles. That brat. Of all words to choose, she has to choose that one and say it in front of everyone.

…hmm, as expected of his own brat.

“Brat.” The baby nods happily. “Brat. Brat.”

#sukuna #uncle sukuna #papa sukuna #yuji itadori

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optimisticlucio · 5 months

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So, about 5 days back YouGov released poll results for a very comprehensive public opinion poll they did for the US, which you can see here: https://d3nkl3psvxxpe9.cloudfront.net/documents/econTabReport_tT4jyzG.pdf The poll itself asks about a lot of different topics, but the section I wanna focus on here is the section between pages 96 to 112, which focuses on Antisemitism and Israel. Most polls with questions like these tended to only survey around 100~200 people, and had really depressing results, so I was really hoping going into this study that we'd see some more cheerful statistics. Maybe those small sample sizes caused some bias, I dunno. Maybe the numbers were off.

I kept being disappointed by how many people denied the holocaust in those studies. I didn't want to believe those numbers were real, quite frankly.

Well.

Of a poll of 1500 people, give or take, 7% say the holocaust is a myth, with another 16% saying they "don't know" whether it is or isn't, with people in the 18-29 age group having even more alarming numbers than that: 20% think the holocaust is a myth, and 30% that they don't know. Conversely, in the 65+ age group, not a single responder denies the holocaust.

If you take this poll as being representative, then out of 331.9 million people living in the US, that gives us about 23.2 million people (rounded down) in the US alone who think the holocaust did not happen.

For reference, there are only 16.2 million jews in the entire world, with 7.1~ million of them in Israel.

Turns out the numbers I saw previously were representative.

Fuck, dude.

#judaism #jumblr #antisemitism #politics #this is.#this is fucked #i legitimately have no idea how to process it #i keep trying to be optimistic yknow #trying to think “nah it's not all bad”#I still refuse to give in to the rhetoric that we are only safe in israel #only safe in a gilded cage onto our own #but what the fuck can i do here dude #you can read the numbers as well as I do #this is #fuck.#ישראבלר

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takitori67 · 5 months

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Can you draw arjuna and junao with their outfits switched??🙏🏻

Sure!

#'why is arjuna covering his titties? is it because youre bad at drawing nipples?' ehehehe nah probably not because of that hehe...🚶‍♀️#i'd like to think junao is enthralled of everything his original self gives to/shares with him btw he's like. thinking about spinning in #that big coat. like a princess trying new dress yknow #this also got me taking a good look at their references again. juna is so formal neat and clean everything about him screams #perfection and professionalism imo #junao is much more 'breezy'?. more skin exposed idk how to say it ig it certainly makes him look more boyish than arjuna but only in 3rd asc #as i see it #also divined as well for all that golden armory #even though arjuna was talked about stuff like being 'endowed hero' and has that bond ce showing his treasury he just has the humble look...#once again idk how to say it but i mean. you can see hes very human. you can see the concept of man and god there in their outfits and i #think its neat. so very neat. amazing rly #anon ask #fgo #arjuna #arjuna alter #yes this is consider #junajuna #too #ttls gallery

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queernobi · 4 months

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There's always this thing among fans of longstanding video game franchises like the Legend of Zelda where people have to insist that the older title people didn't like was actually quite good, and it's been really funny to see people try to do this with Skyward Sword despite it aging like milk.

Any video you see trying to do a serious retrospective has to be like, "Yeah, the controls were bad, and the bosses were a bit repetitive, and most of the dungeons weren't that interesting, and the story was poorly paced, but it's really a good game!" like please. Please stop trying to force this.

#loz #skyward sword #legend of zelda #zelda #i actually don't even really dislike the game #i've barely played it because i kinda got bored with it right away #but i actually do respect what it was trying to go for #even though the OoT style of gameplay had gotten old like 5 years before its release #and the whole 'zelda timeline' shit the devs were forced to work with held it down quite a lot #it's just really funny how so many people defending the game end up just conceding that a lot of aspects of it were unforgivably bad #there's an alternate reality where skyward sword didn't have to abide by timeline bullshit or janky controls #where it could've just been a fun wii-era zelda game with an interesting and unique premise #i'd respect it if defenders actually took the stance 'i think the gameplay is great actually and everyone's wrong about this'#but i've only seen one or two videos taking that position #most others insist that all the glaring issues most people had with the game are actually just minor hindrances #and it's like nah man that's just the whole game

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iloveyoumorethansoup · 5 days

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Having near anxiety attack levels of dread and anxiety in your childhood home because of shitty things that happened last summer is crazy (I am not thriving)

#I thought I was having an ocd episode #nah. I think my mental health has just hit different lows #drove past my old job and had this wave of anxiety pass over me and I thought it was cause it was a horrible job #went to get in the shower that I’ve only used last summer (broke for many years) and almost had to use my parents shower it was so bad #a whole ass main street I drive down #my bed #until I realized those were all the main places I spent last summer sobbing in constantly trying to hold it together #I have never cried like I did day in and day out to my work friends and crying in the shower praying for a text #in the bed that all of the sudden was too big #down the street that I drove up and down twice a day sobbing to the point where I almost had to pull over because it was the only alone time #I am having some sort of something #the only way I’ve avoided it is staying extremely busy #I’m glad I’m not staying the summer here. I don’t think I could experience this all summer #no wonder why I was dreading this visit more than others. my body was remembering grief I have done my utmost to repress and deal with #soup talks #so if anyone has like. ideas on a solution I’d love one

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 day

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AITA for blowing up at my friend?

I have this friend, we'll call him M. M is really, really bad at respecting boundaries unless they're set very hardly. He doesn't take hints very well either, you have to be pretty blunt with him. I think it has to do with his being autistic, and I get it, I really do. He can be a bit of an ass sometimes because of this, but I've never blamed him for it.

And then he met my boyfriend E. E is a very anxious guy, especially around new people. And he's not good at telling people to stop if they're making him uncomfortable. I wasn't there at the time they met (we all go to the same school and I was out that day), but from what my boyfriend told me M was incredibly invasive, made E very uncomfortable many times, and by the end of the day managed to send him into a full blown panic attack because he couldn't understand that what he was saying was extremely triggering to E.

When I got back to school, I was incredibly cold to M. I was trying to avoid a fight, but he asked me if I was mad and everything kind of just came out at once. I really blew up in his face, and I'm usually a calm person. I get that E could have been more direct, and that's something he's working on, but I feel like M should have picked up that something was not alright with the conversation. We talked, and E and M have a better relationship now, but was I the ass for yelling at him like that?

#aita #am i the asshole

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opens-up-4-nobody · 5 months

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...

#ok. this is the fucking bullshit thing abt grad school. u go to fucking grad school bc u r a fucking tryhard nerd freak #who is either naturally very smart or ur so fucking anxious u r incapable of allowing urself to get a bad grad #and then u go to fucking grad school and everyone's like: man fuck ur classes. if youre getting streight As then u aren't focusing on ur #research. and theyre right. but u still cant fucking let go of the idea that if u get a bad grad the world is gonna fucking end and u r a #bad person. u didnt try hard enough. all this to say i have a final project that i put way too much energy into and not even in a good way #i would just open the document. start sobbing. and then close it and spiral abt how i didn't want to work on it. so its bullshit #i mean. its a good project idea ans i probably sound like i kno wtf im talking abt bc i do. i worked on that topic for 4 years but like #i could make it wayyyyy better. its bullshit. i didnt even number the citations to give more page space. i made section headers. i didnt #wrap text. i could add like 4 more lines of text if i wanted but i think im not gotta bc fuck it. ugh. i dont even. i fucking avoide #stochastic stuff altogether which i kno im gonna have to fight abt but like fuck it who cares abt randomness. i just wanna focus on the #predictably aspect of community composition. fuck u. i shouldnt have picked this topic. i mean. i had to bc its like the one microbe thing #i could do but its also like the exact topic that makes me wanna rip my hair out and start screaming. like jesus christ who tf cares? ugh.#i think id give myself a B if it was an undergrad class. but the standard is higher in an all grad class. ugh. i hate this. i should just #send it abd be done. i dont even kno when its due tomorrow. before class i guess. idk i felt like garbage today. fucking vertigo bby. i feel #ok now tho. so maybe the allergic reacting is over???? fingers r still arthritisy tho. jesus. im falling apart #ive got a pretty good sounding excuse for being lazy tho: owo i had an allergic reaction to my antidepressants 🥳 but nah no excuses we run #this body into the ground. like the good old days.#unrelated

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mighty-poop · 7 months

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Define a woman!

I’m gonna rant this here cus this argument keeps returning on the clock app and one day, I’m gonna be stupid and leave a comment in the wrong thread or smthn so I’m just gonna get it out of my system:

“How do you define a ‘woman’?”

Answer for idiots: you can’t.

You cannot possibly make a definition for the term ‘woman’ without excluding someone from the group when they clearly ARE part of the group (even if you’re a piece of shit transphobe and don’t want to include trans women). A woman is someone who has the potential to give birth? You just excluded every child before puberty, every infertile woman and every woman on menopause, next. A woman is someone who has a uterus? You just excluded a bunch of intersex women and all women who had a hysterectomy, next. A woman has a period? Excluded the millions of women who never get their period for various reasons AND all the women who take continuous birth control AND women who are pregnant AND again, little girls and women on menopause. A woman has to have XY chromosomes? Are you gonna check that for every feminine-looking person you’re gonna meet? How? Do you not think women with down syndrome are women?

Decades of feminism working so hard to make sure women are more than their genitals and potential to give birth, all flushed down the drain because you refuse to believe trans women are more than men in wigs? You’re weak as shit.

So answer for people who actually want to use their brain:

Woman is defined through experiences. Which experiences? Entirely up to whoever defines themselves as a woman.

The ‘female experience’ is so broad. You cannot possibly define it in one sentence and stick it on everyone who calls the word ‘woman’ their own.

You feel feminine and empowered by doing your nails? Congrats, that’s the female experience and makes you, therefore, a woman.

You feel feminine and empowered by wearing plaid and splitting wood in two with a giant axe? Congrats! Female Experience. Woman.

You feel feminine in a dress? Woman. You feel feminine in a tux and suit? Woman.

You feel empowered as a mother and love being pregnant? Woman! You despise the idea of being pregnant but find empowerment in your career? Woman! You feel like your period makes you more in tune with your femininity? Woman. You feel like your period makes you less than human and getting a hysterectomy makes you feel more comfortable in your body? Woman.

you love long hair? Woman. You love short hair? Woman.

You love loving men? Woman. You love loving women? Woman. You love both? Woman. You love everyone? Woman. You don’t feel like love is your thing? Woman!

Sitting at home with a good movie and a bottle of wine? That’s a woman. Getting bloody in a game of soccer? That’s very woman! Taking a walk with your dog? How very woman! Going to the gym? Such woman! Eating out with friends? Friend woman. Shooting a gun in the yard from the patio you built yourself? All woman!

Whatever the fuck makes you feel in sync with your femininity is your female experience, and if you have female experience and you like it, you are a W O M A N ✨

Same goes for men and the male experience btw! Since the question “what defines a man” is never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever EVER asked for SOME 👀 reason. (We all know the reason….) Also same goes for my fellow enbies and the non-binary experience. If painting your nails bring you closer to your enbie side, you’re non-binary.

Gender is such a deeply personal experience, it’s just dumb to define it for someone else, let alone the entire human species. It’s like asking to define a chair, like, you KNOW what it is but you can’t possibly define it without excluding some chairs (“has at least 4 legs”, that’s a horse also swivel chairs exist).

Sidenote: If some idiot tiktokker shoves a microphone and a camera in your face and goes “WHAT IS A WOMAN” or “HOW MANY GENDERS ARE THERE” just go along with whatever dumbass scenarios they come up with. “How many genders are there?” “My dude, as many as you want!” “Oh so like 40??” “Yep!” “Can I identify as a helicopter lol?” “Sure, who cares, do it!” “Should I demand everyone at my job calls me a helicopter” “You can go to your local townhouse, request to change your name to ‘helicopter’ and they’ll most likely let you. You’re an adult, you can do whatever you want as long as it’s not hurting others.” “You don’t think it would be dumb of me to do that?” “Why would I care, I don’t know you?”

#Imma get off the clock app for a while again #My fyp is on the wrong side of the argument again #Saw a lot of comments basically boiling down to “you’re delusional and you need to grow up”#Y’all the ones breaking down an entire socio-biological science to just “can u make baby or nah”#And it’s always under videos of enbies with really Out There fashion senses who have Such Trouble talking on the spot #Or who clearly have trouble explaining themselves #And the transphobe eat that shit up like sugar #Cus that’s all we are right #Blue-haired snowflakes who are so confused about our gender experiences that we fumble whenever asked #Like i love y’all fellow enbies with daring fashion but pls be more mean and confident about your identity #“What does that mean being a they/them”#I’m not a woman and I’m also not a man it’s that simple #“Is it that simple?” Yes what are you not understanding do you need me to tell you like a 5 yo?#I’m a brownhaired twink-looking gremlin who dresses like a skater boi who likes musicals and hates make-up and loves books #TRY to define me #Put me in one of your silly little boxes and see what happens #I’m gonna rip the box to shreds until there’s nothing left unless you leave me the fuck alone and let me pee in whichever bathroom i need #I have more pressing matters than worry about you thinking I’m confused but not empathetic enough to wonder why #There’s too much other really bad shit happening in the world for you to wonder if the blue haired young adult deserves to be taken serious

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