#to yourself and to her own personal growth towards being someone better
Text
i've developed some interesting methods of handling having a relationship with my mother who made my childhood/teen years misery and committed more than a little abuse.
as an adult, we have a very different dynamic, her daughters (sister and i) have confronted her with a lot of her bullshit and the things she both did and enabled. for some she has been sorrowful and even sometimes apologetic. she's a better mother to me now than she ever was when i most needed one. so i'll never actually trust her again, and she'll never be much deeper than surface level in my life, but we have something mostly good now, and on my terms.
however, she is very definitely one of those "i don't remember it that way" and "i did the best i could" mothers in a lot of areas, and has also always been the type to (probably unconsciously) emotionally manipulate the people she's hurt into catering to her hurt feelings about it instead.
over the years i've learned to get really comfortable with just not indulging it.
is she having a bad day, seems sad and upset? i'll give her a hug, try to make her laugh. if she throws broad hints it's a surge of hurt feelings about having driven one of her children to cut her off? well i'm just gonna stand there and not acknowledge or entertain it.
"well, apparently i was a bad mother" or shit like that? i'm just gonna look at her for a second, and i might either shrug or even nod, but i'm not saying a damn thing. i'm not awkwardly, uncomfortably, painfully contorting to her guilt trip nonsense. i'm not apologizing or trying to soothe her or reassure her or minimize it.
like, yeah. you really were. you know it, glad to hear it. we've definitely had that talk.
best kindness, most generosity i can offer her in times like that is not maintaining eye contact to bluntly tell her "yeah, you were." she can go ahead and feel bad about it.
it's not on me to make her feel less bad. she should feel bad. and i am definitely not someone she gets to seek comfort from about it.
hopefully someday she'll inch past just "poor me, i'm so sad and angsty about it" towards, like, examining the whys and acknowledging what she actually did wrong and work actively to be be better. in a few places, some of that has happened.
but that's her work. her job and responsibility. she can do that shit on her own time.
i say all this to offer a shoulder of solidarity to others like me. if you maintain a complicated relationship as an adult with the parent who hurt you and did you wrong as a child, that is okay. you get to choose how and if to thread that needle.
but you don't have to accommodate emotional manipulation and guilt trip garbage. stonewall it. walk away if you need to. don't apologize. don't try to make it better. that's not on you and it doesn't have to be. it's okay.
#to her perhaps dubious 'credit'#this has shown genuine results#she has over the years pulled a lot less of that shit#of laying emotional traps to try and make me comfort her about how horrible she was to us as a mom#because she doesn't get the desired result#it's not an easy thing to make a choice to continue having a relationship with a parent like this#who caused you serious harm and painful long-lasting damage#especially not always intentionally generally not maliciously#the abuse was the abuse and it doesn't matter why#how she conducts herself now is what determines if i give her any chance to be any kind of decent mom now#and it's SO HARD at first#because that's your mom you LOVE your mom even through all the shit#you're hardwired to love your mom and you hate to see your mom hurt#instinct is to Make It Better#but that's not always the correct response it can be downright detrimental#to yourself and to her own personal growth towards being someone better#so you teach yourself to just Let Her Be Upset#she should be upset and in a case like this it may in fact be good for her#and it's just not my damn job to make her feel better and i don't mind making that plain#you grow more comfortable with it over time#hold your ground and your stance gets stronger with each step-back not taken#abuse mention
46 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Car's Outside" - part 1
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Driver!Reader
Summary: You're a struggling Formula 1 driver who joins Lewis Hamilton's family on a holiday, discovering unexpected connections and a sense of belonging that transcends the track and redefines your perspective on family and racing.
Word Count: 3090
Trigger Warning/Content Advisory: Contains mature content and explores complex themes. Please be aware that it may also include scenes of high-speed racing, accidents, intense emotions, emotional conflicts, personal growth, and intimate moments. Reader discretion is advised.
Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Masterlist
You're a driver for the Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 team and your teammate is Lewis Hamilton. Lately, you've been experiencing a string of bad races with incidents like DNFs and collisions with other drivers. It's been frustrating for you and affecting your performance, and it's becoming apparent to everyone around you. After the worst race of your life, you're heading back to the paddock.
"For fuck's sake, why does it always have to be me?" you mutter.
Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice Lewis's dad, Anthony Hamilton, waving at you on your way. You walk right past him until someone grabs your arm. Irritated, you shoot them a glare, but your eyes soften as you realize who it was.
"I've been calling out to you from a mile away. Where were you?" he chuckles.
"I'm not sure... I've been distracted by something," you respond, avoiding mentioning what happened earlier.
"Do you have a moment to talk?" he asks, seeming eager to share something.
"Um, yeah, sure," you reply, not fully engaged in the upcoming conversation.
He extends his arm in a gentlemanly way, and you take it, walking together toward the paddock. He leads you to a table where you both sit down.
"So..." he begins, looking at you and rubbing his hands.
"Um... hi?" you greet with a smile, unsure of what's happening.
"I know you've had a rough start, and I was thinking I could offer you some help."
"Oh, I'm fine. I don't think I need anything... um... yeah," you respond, feeling embarrassed and frustrated that Lewis Hamilton's dad has to address this with you.
"I can see it's been challenging for you, (Y/N). It's not about more training or spending time on the simulator. It's about finding a genuine love for what you do," he explains, pausing briefly and then smiling at you.
"What I'm saying is... I'm inviting you to join us for a little break from everything. It's Easter soon, and I know you usually prefer to have some time to yourself, but wouldn't it be better if you got closer to your teammate and have a change of view?"
You and Lewis have never been close friends, perhaps due to the chaos you've caused on the track or because you weren't good enough to be on the team, making him not even acknowledge your existence. You've never had a conversation or even exchanged a nod. Everything people see online is just PR to avoid any controversy.
What confuses you is the fact that you're being invited to their family holiday. You! Someone who has no connection to them whatsoever. Well, you and Anthony had formed a father-daughter bond. He would motivate and encourage you during race week. Your own family has never been close or supportive when it came to racing. Since then, you've worked hard for everything you have and have become independent, not relying on anyone.
You simply blink at his offer, lost for words.
"Lewis!" Anthony calls out as Lewis enters the paddock. "(Y/N) and I were just talking, and I invited her to join us on our holiday."
Lewis looks at his dad, eyebrows furrowed. "Um... Did you ask her, or are you taking her hostage?" He glances at you and then back at his dad.
"You can say no, you don't have to do everything he says," Lewis tells you without even looking in your direction.
"Um... yeah, I don't think I should disturb your family matter," you say, standing up and making your way to your driver's room.
Anthony lets out a disappointed sigh upon hearing Lewis's comments. "I told you she needs our support," he tells Lewis, his eyes filled with sadness.
"You don't know her well enough to know what she needs," Lewis retorts sharply, then turns and heads to his room.
✧*̥˚ Timeskip *̥˚✧
As you prepare to leave and head to the parking area, a smiling Anthony calls out to you from a distance. You jog over to him, not wanting to keep him waiting.
"Hey, I'm sorry for turning down your offer. I thought it might be awkward for..." you begin to explain.
"Oh no, you're coming!" Anthony interjects.
"What?"
"We're leaving right now," he informs you.
"Huh?"
He gently puts his arm around your shoulder and guides you towards a van. You spot Lewis sitting by the window, and Anthony nudges you to get in, making you sit between the two Hamiltons.
Initially, your thoughts race:
Wait... Where did he say we were going?
I don't have a bag with me...
Wait... Where is my passport?
Lewis remains silent, engrossed in his phone as you sit beside him. Anthony wears a smug smile, satisfied that his plan is unfolding as intended.
"Um... Thank you. I guess, for having me... I'm still not sure what's happening," you express, uncertain.
Anthony chuckles in response.
"Here." He hands you your bag. Opening it, you find your passport and other essential items for the airport.
"We are leaving?" you ask, staring at the contents of your open bag.
"But I don't have any clothes with me," you point out to him.
"I've already taken care of that. You'll get some once we arrive in London," he assures you.
"London?"
He smiles at you once more.
You glance at Lewis, who continues to ignore you, still fixated on his phone, unwilling to address the situation.
You take a deep breath.
Well, at least I'm getting a free getaway, you think to yourself.
You arrive at the airport, a crowd of flashing cameras blinds and disorients you. Unsure of where you are standing, someone suddenly appears behind you, guiding you through the airport. Despite being trailed by a swarm of cameras and paparazzi, you manage to make it inside. Curiosity pokes you to turn around and see who helped you.
To your surprise, it's Lewis, and you hadn't realized how close you were standing to each other. Embarrassment flushes your cheeks as the realization sinks in, and you take a step back. Both of you lock eyes, and he gazes back at you with disregard. The words fail to escape your mouth, leaving an awkward silence hanging in the air.
Should I say something?
He probably wouldn't care if I thanked him.
"Alright, that was one step closer to home," Anthony exclaims, breaking the uncomfortable silence, his words drawing attention away from the awkward encounter.
You all boarded the plane, found your seats, and finally allowed yourself to relax. You settled in, trying to create a cozy space for yourself, determined to block out any distractions or disturbances around you. It was time to take a well-deserved rest after everything that had happened.
You round the corner, fully focused and determined, a sudden jolt of impact from behind throws you off balance. The unexpected collision shatters your concentration, and the car swerves off its path, rushing toward the barrier at an alarming speed.
Then, your car slams into the unyielding concrete barrier in a sickening crunch. The impact is overwhelming, causing the car to jolt violently. The immense force propels you forward, pressing your body against the seatbelts and contorting you under its unrelenting pressure.
You awaken from the nightmare, your throat dried and your back drenched in sweat. Gasping for breath, you gradually return to reality, only to find Lewis sitting in front of you, a concerned expression on his face. You scan the surroundings for a water bottle, but none is within reach. Unexpectedly, he offers you his bottle—the one he always keeps close, guarded from anyone else's touch.
You hesitate to accept it, but the dryness in your throat triggers a fit of coughing.
"Just take it," he insists. Reluctantly, you grasp the bottle, bringing it close to your lips, and you glance at him again. His gaze remains fixed on you, carefully observing your body language.
"Were you dreaming about the crash again?" he asks you, his tone empty of emotion.
"Why would you care?" you snap, a touch of bitterness seeping into your words.
So now you can talk?
He simply stares at you, his silence carrying a weight of its own.
"Yeah," you finally admit, looking down at your lap, feeling the lingering pain in your head from that fateful day, as if it wants to force you to relive. You place your hand on the back of your head, swallowing and exhaling deeply.
Lewis abruptly stands up and departs without uttering another word.
Hmm... He left me his beloved sippy cup, you think to yourself.
Finally, you arrive in London after what feels like forever, and you retrieve your suitcase, realizing that you'll be spending a considerable amount of time with the Hamiltons. On the way to the car, you find yourself once again sandwiched between the Hamiltons.
I can't escape this situation anymore. Well, I'll be surrounded by them regardless, so I might as well get used to it.
Sitting there in silence, it dawns on you that you haven't bought anything for them, feeling a pang of embarrassment. "Um... Anthony? Is it okay that I didn't bring any gifts for your family? It's already embarrassing enough to join you on this holiday. I could have at least gotten you guys something..."
"Oh, don't be silly," he reassures you, a warm smile on his face. "You are part of the family now, so don't worry about those things."
His words bring a smile to your face, and he reciprocates the gesture.
Gazing out of the car window, you take in the sights of Stevenage, London. The vibrant town envelops you, with a blend of historical and modern buildings lining the bustling streets.
The journey through the streets of Stevenage, London immerses you in a sensory delight. The blend of sights, sounds, and scents creates a vibrant tapestry of city life. Every step fills you with a growing excitement and curiosity, as you eagerly explore the streets, eager to uncover the hidden treasures that lie within.
Arriving at their house, you're greeted by a charming, quaint home with a small garden decorating the front. You can't help but admire the beauty of it all, puts a smile on your face.
"Let's go inside," Anthony invites you, breaking you out of your trance.
Before taking another step, you turn around, quickly checking yourself in the reflection of your phone. You make a few adjustments to your hair, brushing off any specks of dust from your clothes. Taking a deep breath, you give yourself a pep talk, “Don’t be awkward or say anything weird, okay?”
You hear a chuckle behind you and turn to find Lewis smirking at your words. "Can't be helped," he remarks casually.
Wait, did he just make a joke? You're taken aback, his demeanor seemingly different from what you expected.
He walks into the house, leaving you standing there with your mouth slightly agape. Lewis appears to have a new side to him.
You step into the house and are warmly welcomed by Anthony's wife. She greets you with a hug and expresses her hopes that you will enjoy your stay. Grateful for their hospitality, you thank her sincerely.
"Come in, come in," she invites you further in. As you make your way through the hall with your luggage, you enter the living room. There, you see Lewis playfully interacting with his niece and nephew, laughter filling the air. The room is decorated with family photos and cherished remembrances, giving you a glimpse into their close bond.
The children catch sight of you and excitedly run toward you.
"We know you!" they exclaim. "We see you on TV all the time!"
Surprised and touched, you engage with them. "You watch the races?"
"Yeah! We see you and Sir uncle all the time!" they happily reply, embracing you tightly. Their genuine affection warms your heart.
"You guys are too sweet," you say, unable to contain your smile. They giggle mischievously before returning to play with Lewis.
Anthony appears from the corner of the room. "Alright, would it be alright if you stayed in Lewis's room for tonight?" he asks.
"Oh, umm... sure. But where will-"
"Don't worry about him, he's a grown man," Anthony reassures you, leading you to Lewis's room. He opens the door and gestures for you to enter first.
"This isn't his room, but since he visits us often, we call it that and some of his stuff are here," Anthony explains.
"Anthony," you pause, looking at him gratefully.
He meets your gaze. "Thank you for having me stay here. It's nice. I promise I'll make it up to you."
"You better," he responds, playfully teasing you.
You chuckle, appreciating the lightheartedness of the moment, and walk around the room, ready to make yourself at home in this new environment.
At night, the Hamilton family has a nice dinner together. The room looks cozy with soft lights. The table is set nicely with fancy dishes, shiny silverware, and colorful flowers.
The food smells delicious and makes you hungry. It tastes great, with different flavors from juicy roasted meats to tasty sides and salads. Everyone is happy and talking, creating a joyful atmosphere.
The Hamiltons are excited about their upcoming trip to Bali. They talk about the beautiful beaches, nature, and culture there.
You see how close the family is and how they take care of each other. They listen and understand each other, showing the importance of real relationships. Being here teaches you that family is more than just blood. It's about the connections we make with people who appreciate us. At this moment, you feel like part of their family, embraced by their warmth. Seeing their passion and support inspires you to pursue your interests. Their belief in you boosts your confidence.
In this special moment, You vow to nurture and cherish the connections that bring care and passion into your life. As you feel accepted at this table, you realize that you're never truly alone because a family can be found in the hearts of those who care for you unconditionally.
"What does your family do on holidays?" one of the kids asks you.
"Oh, umm..." you begin to respond, but Lewis interrupts you.
"You don't need to answer that," he says, tickling the child to divert their attention from the sensitive topic.
"It's okay," you say, smiling at Lewis. "Well, usually I go on solo holidays because my family is usually busy." You still cling to that excuse, even though deep down you know your family wouldn't care as much.
"Where did you go last time?" the children ask, their innocent eyes filled with genuine curiosity.
"I went to Japan, and it was absolutely beautiful," you reply convincingly, even though they are just children who would believe anything you say.
They continue asking you questions, and you answer them sincerely until...
"I heard from the TV that you got in an accident," they say, unaware of the weight of their question.
Suddenly, your ears ring, and your hand instinctively goes to the back of your head.
"Okay, I think it's bedtime," Lewis declares, diverting their attention.
"But she hasn’t told-"
"Time to go," Lewis effortlessly carries them out of the room.
✧*̥˚ Timeskip *̥˚✧
You find yourself sitting on the bed, possibly due to jetlag or simply because you're in the room of a seven-time world champion. A mischievous thought crosses your mind, urging you to snoop around, while another voice suggests taking something valuable and selling it on eBay. The conflicting thoughts leave you undecided.
Realizing your phone battery is low, you desperately search your bag, hoping to find a charger. However, to your dismay, there is no charger to be found. Frustrated, you grab your luggage in the hope of finding a charger there, but your search proves wrong. Defeated, you let out a sigh.
Perhaps someone is still awake and you could borrow a charger from them. With a glimmer of hope, you open the door and notice light coming from the living room. Your spirits lift momentarily, only to deflate when you see Lewis sitting there with his laptop, absorbed in who knows what.
"Hey, umm... I forgot to bring my charger. Could I borrow yours?" you ask Lewis, keeping your gaze on his laptop.
"How do you forget your own charger?" he responds with a hint of sass.
"Well, I didn't know about this trip until recently," you sassily reply.
"And someone else packed my bag for me," you add, realizing that arguing won't get you anywhere when you really need that charger. He reluctantly hands it over and returns to his laptop.
As you turn to leave, the tension between you both becomes real. In a moment of vulnerability, you express your concerns to him, "I know we aren't friends, and maybe you hate me or something," you begin, your voice filled with a hint of vulnerability.
"But I hope I don't make this trip uncomfortable for you. If you want me to leave, I will, so I don't disturb your holiday..."
Lewis pauses for a moment, surprised by your unexpected words. The honesty in your voice catches him off guard, making him reconsider his preconceived notions about you.
"No, it's okay," he responds, his voice softer now. "I don't hate you, and I don't want you to leave. We can try to make the best of this trip, even if things are a bit awkward between us. Let's just focus on enjoying the holiday."
You nod, a flicker of relief crossing your face. "Alright then. Let's try to make it work."
With a small smile, Lewis bids you goodnight and retreats to his room, hoping that this newfound understanding will help ease the tension and be comfortable for the rest of the trip.
You return to your room feeling baffled by your conversation with Lewis as if you were speaking to someone entirely different. Nevertheless, you lie back on the bed and plug in your phone to charge. You can't help but think about selling this charger later.
As fatigue sets in, you gradually drift off to sleep, caving to the embrace of slumber.
🌟 Attention, fellow readers! 🌟
You have the power to shape this story too! Share your questions, predictions, and ideas. Let's dive deeper into this journey together.
🌟Taglist:🌟
@omgsuperstarg @copper-boom @notleclerc
#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton blurb#lewis hamilton fanfic#lewis hamilton fanfics#lewis hamilton fanfiction#lewis hamilton fic#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton imagines#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton one shot#lewis hamilton x you#sir lewis hamilton#mercedes amg f1#lewis hamilton x driver!reader#f1 imagine#f1 fiction#f1 lewis#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 fandom#Car's Outside Series
446 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Impermanence, the Buddha said, is the source of all suffering. Therefore, if you can stop the source, challenging times take on a whole new reality. But how do you do that as a lay Buddhist? During a challenging time, we need to have three things: faith, effort, and practice"
Impermanence can cause intense suffering when we lose our loved ones, financial security, our homeland or inner sense of security, our joy etc. Impermanence can also bring relief when we know that our problems are impermanent and that mistreatment will sometimes come to an end. Of course, we can't take away impermanence, we can only remove our negative perspective towards it and fully appreciate the present moment as it appears, seeing it as an opportunity for spiritual growth and development.
It's easy to think that it would be better if we didn't encounter those people who direct negativity at us, lower our self-esteem, want us to feel bad with, for example, nasty comments and gossip. However, a wise, mature individual understands that no one really wants us to suffer, even if they cause suffering. They themselves don't want to suffer, they escape their bad feeling by wrong means or are temporarily ignorant and therefore self-centered. It is wrong and also sad for us all and for themselves.
Growth includes great understanding about impermanence, cause and effect, forgiveness, understanding that everything we've experienced has shaped us. Everything experienced makes us stronger, we understand ourselves and others better, we love stronger, we learn forgiveness, humility, tolerance, patience, great compassion.
We can truly care about all sentient beings and their well-being. I experienced that already as a child when I had to face many difficulties.
We must also care about ourselves and understand that individual who talks bad about us, lies or otherwise hurts us is not right, we are not what he/she claims. We ourselves know what we are, we will continue progressing steadily forward with loving kindness. Loving yourself is certainly important, but loving others is even more important, (Bodhicitta).
Maturity is facing things with compassion and never with rage and gossiping around even when others are gossiping about us. If we don't regret our own wrongdoings, we don't improve. If those who do not correct their wrong actions towards us continue to do so, they may not have time in this life to correct their karma. So instead of holding grudges or seeking revenge, let's have compassion. One must see deeper into the true nature of things, phenomena.It also dispels the emphasized or clinging thought about oneself and others so that the experience of oneness is strengthened.
We can walk away or stay, it depends on the situation and the seriousness of the matter but it also depends on the extent of our compassion, on our ability to tolerate some unpleasant habits that sometimes appear in others, just as we hope others will tolerate if we have a bad day or something in another's behavior triggers us (e.g. because of our past, karma or his karma ) and we don't behave, act as we normally do. It's a different matter if we ourselves have a habit of overreacting, it can create unnecessary discord in our lives and in the lives of others. If someone e.g. comment on our words, our new clothes, our our preferences regarding food, lifestyle, travel, our bad habits etc. surely that's not a reason to label him/ her an enemy, gossip by labeling him/ her as bad person. That would be very immature. There are really serious things in the world that many struggle through. Maybe someone who is used to have mainly small problems continues to exaggerate those small things. Others go through real difficulties, fight for their lives when experiencing diseases, hunger, oppression caused by others or by karma, conditions.
The ego does not really understand what is serious and what is not. The ego gets hurt, gets angry at everything connected to it's self image and finds it all serious, wants others to believe that a serious wrongdoing happened. There is imagined grave injustice and real grave injustice. If someone destroys your/our good reputation with their gossips it is a serious injustice, as well as if they hurt you physically, threaten your life, drive you from your home, steal your property or something else that we generally understand as serious. However, egocentric individuals maintain the idea of wrongness which is not true but mainly created by their delusions. In their opinion, you can only praise them, the rest is injustice. I have to ask: How do anyone learn anything other than to grow their ego if they are only praised? One might do wrong to others, such things that they themselves would not want to experience, if we only praise and support, we also encourage or allow that behavior to continue. Especially if we allow ourselves to develop like that, we will not develop.
Of course, loving yourself is very important, but
we can't just focus on self love and forget the unfair things we've done (if there are any) and continue doing so. It would be the opposite of growth, as well as if others do so in relation to us. We wouldn't call it growth. Growth is bearing responsibility, it includes correcting one's own behavior and understanding things holistically. A narrow-minded person sees the mistakes of others, labels others, gossips about others and brazenly continues with his/her own negative patterns of behavior. It is not growth by any means.
We grow with mindfulness, mind training, great effort. It does not focus on shutting out things and people for insignificant reasons, but above all on shutting down one's own overreacting behaviors. It is meant to really transform us into better versions of ourselves without any arrogance, blaming others or mocking with wrong definitions. If we continuously behave badly like that, others will certainly behave as well, but even if we only want good for everyone and behave well, someone will behave badly towards us, maybe because of karma, maybe because of their bad mood, or because of their ignorance. We can always bear our responsibility and do/ behave better.
Being reminded of our own responsibility is not blaming you/us for anything. One must know the difference. The Buddha also did not blame when he reminded, Guru does not blame, I do not blame. I repeat the reminders of the Gurus. It is part of the mind training, mindfulness practice.
Let love, let the truth win, never the distortion of things. May we never listen to those who talk, gossips about other people's motives, wills, essence as if they know better than we know ours. Everything is impermanent, and no one can define others permanently. No one else knows who we are better than we know.
I believe you are good. Don't let anyone take away your belief in yourself. When our will is good, our faith is firm, it creates miracles around us and liberates. Impermanence is a comforting, beautiful thing when understood correctly, when living as a conscious, loving being in this moment which is Now. To truly understand impermanence is the key out of suffering, into deeper happiness.
May all mother sentient beings be happy, Mother Tara bless you, protect you 🌟
Om Tāre Tuttāre Ture Soha
***
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Your future spouse first Impression of you & Love messages
May or may not be for you . Thats okay ♡ 1 -3
some typos . I told someone I will do Pac like this so
Pile one -Imagine
They will be impress by your height , the heels that you wear they will love your walk and they will see you from the back but sense that your attractive . The way that you carry yourself ,your body and how your dress that day is good. They want to get close to you tobget better look and have a sweet scent or voice . Your future spouse will just see your eyes but not your full face. For the guys they will notice your beard ,moustages and in general your hair look curly. You have the dewy eye look and the guys the wear you have jacket . Your spouse has been wanting to get to know you for a long time wanting to start a relationship but in another way this can be about being caught offgaurded.
They will notice you having to muiltask so it that way for example your taking care of people younger than you ,on phone at same time while out shopping. They see that your good at thinking quickly and handling crisis. Your spouse will think of you as someone who is empathic and they sense that ypur going through a lot of different changes in your life at the moment. Meeting can happen at an amusment park or some place like that you have to move around a lot and so much happening at once. They can see how chill you are before getting ride than seeing you freak out while on but then after you get back to yourself so they will think thats cute. They like seeing you get exicted to .
Love messages ♡
Let love be the one to help us see through any difficult issue because you are the one who showed me what love really is. I heard of love that grows old, love that is just sexual, love that has no boundaries, and that no matter what language we speak or where we are from, our love will set us free.
Right now the message from your special person is one that although right now you cant be together . It's hard on them as much as it is for you. They are letting you know that now they are ready for your union. They want you to know that your home life will improve and that you are not going to be alone anymore. that others will reach out to you with more love to give you compliments, gifts, and just plain old love. They feel inspired by your own growth, and things will soon shift for the better around you.
cards :8 wands king cups , 2 of pentacles / random messages : pink or red heels.
pile two- A love
cards /random messages : 2 of diamonds shine bright, sunny days , movie goofy , page of swords , king swords ,page wands ,eight
The song title is the message and maybe the art to.
Your at a large gathering and they will be speechless on seeing you. They will gasp or suck in breath whisper how fine that person is or damn they look good. Your in process of ending something or something came to the end. They see it on your social media and they see you trying to be better than who you were before. You went through a process of training yourself to get ahead in your life. It reminds me if an Ice skater that probably went through all these errors and trials to be able to land her trick but then they ended up banning afterwards.
It takes more effort to get what you want at the moment. eventually that era is coming to end and your in process of going toward a new chapter in your life. A new career , moving to new place/ out of your family place , and going to college . Able to accomplish a lot in life and when your able to elminate yout bias. Your hard working and they love seeing what your passion about in life. They like seeing you at work . They are very focus on you at the moment at work how your in charge and even if your not in charge but they see you as someone who is respected in work place. Many people going toward in you in your place.
love message ♡
My heart is heavy, but my soul knows that this pain will soon pass. I want to just run fast toward you and just experience this love. Even without touching your lips or you, I felt a warm, loving energy that embraced me all over. I felt safe enough to tell you everything, which had my heart panciking for the first time to talk about my insecurities without fear of judgement. I'm glad you stay next to me even on my bad days.
They often are attack because of how much that attarct in their life being in high postion. Others around them can think that they are purposly trying to werck their life but they do things for spiiritual purposes and their own experinces that helps them to be able to cope with life. seven wands destroyed saboteur. They will feel safe to be around you is the word I want to use because comfrot is also one word hut in then sense of just being themselves.
They see you as someone who is sassy , that can stand up yourself and they see you as a passionate person. You may be walking away from a job at this time or correcting someone at your job. They will feel exicted and ready to begin to meet you . Your going to a new place.
Pile three- (so) divine
They see you as someone postive and say that you like Starbucks, drink coffee, or just drink in general (alcohol). For the feminine energy, they like how you dress bohemian or in bright colors. They like gold jewelry you like to wear, and the more masculine energy here can like to show it off. In terms of fashion, it can be like just wearing less and showing off their personality. They feel that you made a grand entrance into their lives and that you are someone of huge importance. that you are able to help the world or just the community around you do better. They see you as someone who will just start things quickly in life. Your future spouse thinks of you as someone who has both the goddess and dark goddess aspects to themselves and is able to create whatever they want in life. They do see you as someone who can use their seduction to get whatever they desire.
They think you're mischievous, but it does come from your rebellious nature. You can trigger things in others that remind them of things they need to heal within. Others at times can think you're just being rebellious to cause trouble and not to educate others. Yet it is good to talk and just bring awareness, but when it comes from your own words and not those of others, it is more powerful. Instead of coming from a place of arrogance,They are the type to dwell on making sure everything is right in love before they confess. They also need to be in a good place in their career.
Love message ♡
It's hard to figure out who you are, and when I think I know who you are, there's always another side you've hidden to reveal later on. I felt that I had to take my time in getting there, as I had thought it could take some time. I know life is a journey, not a race, but I can't stop thinking of you. Where do you like to go in your free time? What makes you laugh, why did you feel sad on that day, and do you like to stay up or fall asleep at night? these questions, but I don't want to pressure you or come on too strong. I do hope that when I figure out how to take things to a level where we both feel connected to each other.
103 notes
·
View notes
Text
Wotakoi - Coming Out vs. Concealment for Otaku
When it comes to identifying yourself as a nerd/otaku/geek, there hasn’t been a better time to do so. We’re in the age where geeks have inherited the Earth to a major degree. Despite the growing acceptance of all things nerdy, there are people who don’t want to reveal their inner geek to others around them. This subject gets addressed in the very last volume of Fujita’s Wotakoi: Love Is Hard for Otaku.
Way back in the 1st volume of Wotakoi, Narumi Momose doted on Hirotaka Nifuji over her ex-boyfriends. All of them dumped her once she told them that she was an otaku. Narumi lamented her bad choices until Hirotaka makes the bold move of asking to be her boyfriend due to both of them being otaku. Narumi accepts with little hesitation after Hirotaka offers to help work on her Comiket booth. Narumi and Hirotaka carry on as a couple without anyone knowing about their otaku hobbies (with a few notable exceptions).
Narumi’s fear of rejection over being an otaku comes to a head near the finale of the series when she accidentally drops a pile of BL doujinshi at her office with her co-workers seeing them. A visibly distraught Narumi tries to talk to Hirotaka about her concern of being outed as an otaku at work. Hirotaka says it shouldn’t matter, only to bring up Narumi’s past pain with her first boyfriend rejecting her because of her otaku hobbies. Narumi feels it’s best to not let anyone know, but Hirotaka insists that she tells everyone at the office. Narumi yells at Hirotaka to drop the subject and the latter tells her sarcastically that she’s clearly more experienced in handling the problem than he is due to his own lack of interpersonal growth. Their first real fight as a couple leads Narumi down a path where she realizes that being stuck in her own head and fears led her to forgetting that Hirotaka is the one person who’s willing to help her when she’s in distress.
A while back, I read an article about coming out as members of the LGBTQ+ community and the nuance of whether to come out or not. The article discussed how some people may choose to conceal their sexual identity with very good reasons. Sometimes, the environment they’re in is hostile. Harassment of all kinds is sadly a thing despite growing acceptance. There’s also the fact that not everyone will understand and appreciate why someone might conceal their sexual identity in the 1st place.
You can apply disclosure of your identity towards topics like revealing your mental illness and fandom. I sometimes have felt that once I told people who I thought were great friends my mental illness and fandom years before those topics became mainstream, I was slowly pushed aside for people who were more “normal” and had more popular interests at the time. Like how Narumi felt, that rejection still stings. Coming out personally brought a lot of anguish for me 20 years ago.
There’s also something Narumi said that made me think about coming out. While moping about Hirotaka trying to reason with her, she laments on why he doesn’t understand what she’s going through with regards to outing herself as an otaku. I think back to an online post called “I don’t want you to understand” (sadly, I can’t find it on Archive.org). It was a personal post from someone living with mental illness that they don’t want anyone to emphasize them and wouldn’t want anyone to hear about their struggles. All they really want in the end is for someone to just be there and be willing to stick by them through the worst of times.
Narumi gets flashbacks of Hirotaka being there for her throughout her life and she sees that she’s letting her personal drama get the best of her. All of a desire to feel understood. It’s fine to seek validation for your thoughts and feelings, but people understanding your problems doesn’t mean that they can solve them for you. Wanting to be understood is often a result of poor self-esteem, which Narumi had regarding her self-confidence in her otaku nature. Plus, not everyone’s meant to be alike no matter what common interests we share. Hirotaka points this out to Narumi when they eventually make up and he explains that through genuinely listening to one another and being present with them no matter what, emotional wounds can heal.
Narumi does out herself as an otaku to her co-workers and much to her surprise, they aren’t bothered by it. One of her co-workers even points out that times have changed for acceptance of otaku in Japanese society. Narumi believes Hirotaka and her friends really helped gave her the courage to take that step to accept herself as an otaku towards people she cares about. While she won’t share her interests to just anyone, Narumi realizes that the people who do care about her will accept all parts of her.
It’s hard to come out as a closet (insert identity) or make a good decision to do so when you’re in some kind of crisis or feel as if you’re in one. You have to be in a really good place mentally to talk about it, just like Narumi with her disclosure about her otaku identity. I know from experience, one of the worst things you can do is overwhelm someone about your pain without giving them any context. I remember a time where I was rejected by someone I was close with and I doted on a friend of theirs I didn’t know well. I came out to them about my mental illness without a care because I was so sad. They replied that they didn’t need to know that. We never really spoke again after that. While it looks like I talk a lot about my condition on my blog, I don’t really talk about my mental illness to people in real life and/or am not willing to disclose a great deal of information about it. I’ll save that conversation for people I really want in my life.
The author Fujita stressed in a interview with Kodansha USA that she wanted to talk about Narumi’s internal struggle over otaku acceptance for the longest time, so I’m glad that she focused on it at the end of the series. I look at Narumi’s case and I think everyone has to decide for themselves on when to out themselves as proud members of a community that’s considered stigmatized. You can’t just force someone to do it all just because the pros outweigh the cons. I now wonder if Fujita wanted to talk about how otaku often struggle with internal doubt and how they need to let unconditional love (when it comes) open their perspective to new ways of thinking.
Like how Narumi’s friends (and the cast of Wotakoi) show, it takes all kinds of people combined with love to help make the decision of hiding vs. showing not so stressful.
Much love to Fujita for writing Wotakoi. I just got the complete U.S. box set after reading the series through copies I borrowed from my local library over the years. I’m very excited to see her next work! (which I hear will explore LGBTQ+ themes with regards to gender dysphoria)
#Wotakoi#love#closet otaku#mental health#relationships#manga#Fujita#Narumi Momose#Hirotaka Nifuji#identity#fandom
52 notes
·
View notes
Text
Young!Max having a crush on you would include~
(Not my gif)(Requested by my brain who wouldn’t let this idea leave it)
(Ah yes, the bi lifestyle: loving both women and Robert De Niro respectively)
- Moving to a different borough during his late teens gave Max the perfect opportunity to start fresh and find himself a girl who didn’t know what he looked like during his more gangly and awkward phases of adolescent growth. And that’s exactly what he did; though whether or not he was still gangly and awkward is definitely up for debate.
- A pretty girl is a pretty girl but Max definitely has an especially stiff hard on for girls; or boys, who are “sinners”. He likes rambunctious people who get down and dirty, and who can hold their own against his equally unsavory “business practices”. He doesn’t see himself leaving this job of his anytime soon so he’s looking for someone who can roll with the punches, or at least someone who knows when to duck.
- Max adheres to a pretty hard ‘love at first sight’ policy, if he likes someone, he likes them the first time he sees them, and it only spirals from there. That’s what’s good about him: your personality will be a plus but it technically doesn’t even matter. Whoever you turn out to be is irrelevant; he loves you from the beginning and he’s determined to love you no matter what.
- For obvious reasons, the way Max goes about his crushes all depends on the type of person he’s managed to fall for. If the girl is sweet then he’s gonna find it a lot harder to get close to her, but if they’re on the “sour” side, he’ll find it a lot easier. He just knows how to handle and appeal to those types of characters a lot better.
- He doesn’t really know how to act like a gentleman without it coming off as awkward and insincere so he’d probably just play into the whole “rapscallion thing” and teasingly make himself out to be some sort of thug: all the while behaving in an obviously good natured way so you; the “good girl”, don’t actually see him as a threat or think he’s willing to hurt you. He might pull your leg or act unceremonious and uncivilized but that’s just his personality; and the personality of most teenage boys in your area so it doesn't scare you off.
- Although, as I said before: Max is typically attracted to people who aren’t very innocent and sweet. You don’t have to be born with a “how to pick pocket” pamphlet in your brain, but having a mind that conjures up insults and quick comebacks will definitely help your case.
- When you meet him for the first time, he’ll undoubtedly manage to get a rise out of you and though you’re trying your best to scare him off; what with all your insults and other signs of verbal distaste for him, all you manage to do is draw him and make him want to know you even more.
- Unfortunately for you, Max’s usual method for making new friends is trying to prove that he’s better than or just as good as them. Impressing them by triumphing over them and making sure that they don’t write him off too quickly; even if it means that they initially dislike him.
- Max isn’t shy in the slightest: he’ll interject himself into your life as soon as possible and probably piss you off in the process, all before redeeming himself in one way or another; forcing you to drop your animosity towards him against your own better judgement.
- If you’re the type of girl who’s willing to do some terrible shit for some money, he’d probably tease you about being “just a girl” but wouldn't miss the opportunity to get close to you; either convincing you to join forces with him after seeing how much potential you have or taking you in under his wing/letting you join his makeshift business after you approach him yourself.
- He uses this newfound relationship of yours to get closer to you and otherwise cockblock you. Oh, what’s this? You’re talking to another boy? Time to call you over when he really doesn’t need to and either divvy up your cash or brief you on your next set of shenanigans.
- He’d make jokes about your “new romance” with another boy but would grow annoyed and act somewhat betrayed whenever you’d blow him off to hang out with them. He’d never come up with an arguably valid excuse; mainly because he didn’t have one, but he’d say something along the lines of how the two of you are partners and that you need to stick together and trust no one else.
- Sometimes you’ll get into fights over his possessiveness or in your eyes; his moodiness/pushiness, but you’re never able to stay mad at each other for very long. You’ll walk down the street, swearing you won’t talk to him for the rest of your life but a few glances from across the road as he works for his mother; seeing the way he stops in his tracks to stare at you and the way his eyes hold a hope that you’ll approach him, and your resolve breaks little by little; even if you really want to punish him.
- Working for his mother gave him a surprising amount of strength and he likes to use it to his advantage from time to time: picking you up and helping you down from places regardless of whether or not you actually need him to; playing chivalrous. He always feels a wave of pride wash over him when you look to him whenever you need some help; especially if there’s other boys there that you could have or maybe even should have asked. It inflates his ego to consider the fact that you think he’s the strongest one in the vicinity.
- Whenever him and his mother drive around town; particularly if you aren’t very close yet, he likes to smile down and offer you a ride: helping you up happily if you shyly agree and sitting thigh to thigh as you ride on the little step in back.
- He walks you home and to school a lot as well; even though he doesn’t go himself (I think?). He gets up early to walk with you yet plays it off like he has things to do whenever you ask why he’s awake; even though his job doesn’t start for another hour or he took off just to come and take you.
- His arm around your shoulders while he guides you around town. He always makes a joke out of it, slinging his arm around you while he makes some sort of teasing comment, but it allows him to be affectionate with you and scare off potential suitors all the same.
- He’s kind of a little asshole but he’s also sort of cute with it. Like yes, he pushed you into a pool of water; clothes and all, but he did jump in after you and the two of you did have a lot of fun. They’re the sorts of things that you brush off as stupid situations that all guys get into with their male friends; things you’d know nothing about since you’re a girl and always left out of them, but it’s definitely more of a “stupid things guys do when they have a crush” sort of thing and an attempt to tear down your walls and get closer to you.
- He looks back at these moments fondly and thinks of them as proof that you have to like him back or at least be close to realizing that you have all along. He imagines that you can use them as evidence to choose him over someone else or that you’ll both be able to think back of them years down the line and reminisce about how the two of you fell in love.
- He’s definitely stolen some kind of jewelry for you and though you have to hide it from your mother; knowing you’d never be able to explain or come up with an excuse, you still wear it every day and night.
- If you’re particularly small or of the innocent variety then he’d definitely be fairly protective of you: acting like your knight in shining armor and keeping an eye on you, making sure you stay relatively out of trouble and always having your back against the dangerous fools of the city.
- Him getting into a fight over you is pretty much inevitable. The minute a guy disrespects or threatens you, he loses his temper and winds up rolling around on the ground with them; getting in as many punches as he can.
- It isn’t often but he’ll occasionally get himself into worrying situations just to have you show that you care for him; especially if you’re a ‘play it cool’ type of person. He’ll pretend to drown or say something about him being in danger or he’ll purposefully scuff himself up to see if you’ll notice and care: and he’s always ecstatic to see that you do; even if you merely make a joke about it or pretend like you care a lot less than you really do.
- There are definitely times during your friendship where you jokingly pretend to be husband and wife: jokingly because he’s absolutely only joking. He’s just calling you dearest for the bit haha. It’s so funny when you rest your head lovingly on his shoulder and stroll with him arm in arm. Finishing each others sentences really takes this comedic routine to the next level haha.
- Your ability to momentarily fluster him is unmatched; even if you don't quite notice the fact that you’ve made him nervous or the reason you've somehow attained this new skill.
- He’s got a lot of pictures of you on his camera. Most of them are joking, a sort of “oh, come and model for me” brand of over exaggerated poses, but he’ll also occasionally catch you off guard with a quick “look over here” and a flash of the light. Sometimes you’ll take them purposefully and try to look tough or cool; something he finds particularly adorable, and other times he’ll use the excuse of wanting to see how well it works to get close ups and candid photos of you. They’re some of his most treasured possessions.
- He looks you up and down and watches you under his lashes a lot: and if you were ever paying enough attention to notice or were just a bit more knowledgeable when it came to romance; you’d easily be able to tell that he was in love with you just from those little looks alone.
- He spies on you but he’s a whole lot better at not being caught then Noodles is so sorry but you’ll probably never find out about his creepy occasional habit.
- At some point, he learns the usefulness of a bra and subsequently hands you things he needs you to hold and/or hide. Later looking at them like “oh dear, this has touched the tit of the woman I love” or sneaking glances at you as you dig everything out of your shirt once you've both gotten away from the scene of the crime.
- Okay, but him dressing you up in his old hand-me-downs in an attempt to keep you safe and make it easier for you to run and him falling even more in love with you as a butch, soot and sweat covered little girl; head over heels for you the same way a normal boy would react to seeing a girl in her Sunday best.
- Speaking of clothes: at some point, you’ll find yourself in love with another boy; enough to where you’re attempting to dress up and make yourself more presentable, and though you insist it’s for another reason entirely, he’ll know why you’re doing it immediately and the thought of it will kill him. He'll feel betrayed and like the guy is unworthy and he’ll probably make comments about how “if a guy doesn't like you in your normal clothes then he wont like you in a fancy dress”. And though the comments bother you, you try not to take them to heart: responding with something like “I don’t know what you’re talking about” or how “if anyone if going to like [you] they’re gonna have to realize you’re a girl.”.
- I don’t think that Max would confess, I think he’d just lay one on you one day and keep kissing you until you melted or wrenched yourself away from him; if only to look at him in surprise and ask what he “did that for”.
“Cause I wanted to.” He’d say out of breath and you’d pause before saying something like ‘oh,’ or ‘you could have asked’; as you took into consideration exactly what he was trying to tell you.
“Can I” He’d respond and after a small pause, you’d agree and he’d grin; glancing down at your lips before crushing you to him once again.
#max bercovicz imagine#max bercovicz imagines#max bercovicz headcanons#max bercovicz headcanon#young max bercovicz imagine#once upon a time in american imagine#once upon a time in american imagines#once upon a time in america headcanons#once upon a time in america headcanon#80s movie imagines#80s movie imagine#80s movie headcanons#80s movie headcanon
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
On Making a List for Living
As I've been moving ahead, cleaning up my shit inside my head, I made a list of things that fill me with joy and happiness.
Mostly to keep me busy and moving forward AND to help me improve my self-image.
NGL, at first, it was a struggle to start doing them. I was just so lost and depressed, living in the void that was left behind from my ex, yes, but also, the deeper void left behind by my parents dysfunctional shit they put inside my head.
But ... I made my list. I set my goals.
And each day, it gets easier and easier. And I'm honestly starting to feel better about myself - my present self and my wounded child.
The other day, I posted a one month summary of my progress and ... yeah ... I was surprised to see that I'm honestly crushing it. I felt like I was still moving in quicksand.
Maybe I set my goals too low? lol
Also true: I have to work it aggressively still.
I will catch myself being mean-spirited towards myself. I pause and course-correct when I do. Learning to be kind to yourself is ... surpisingly hard for many of us.
And I struggle with over-stepping boundaries. Boy is this a problem for me.
I've spent my life getting outside validation. So I have a burning desire to offer advice and help and guidance but ... I'm doing my best to correct this too.
It's grueling. I fall into agony trying to figure out ... is this kind? is it welcome? is it useful? is it necessary? Usually the answers are: maybe, not unless asked for, maybe, no.
With my ex in particular, it's so hard. Because ... I legitimately am impressed by her and can see her own growth. I believe in her more now than I ever did. She's going to be fine - I know that.
But *sad lol* ... I have this desire to nurture her and care for her. And give her advice and express concerns if I see them.
It's so ... frustrating. But I'm doing my best to learn about boundaries, set them for myself, and respect others. I ... want her to know how much I care for her and am there for her ... but I don't want to fall into unhealthy habits or make her think I feel I am there to "fix" her.
I struggle with "how do I show someone I care for them and accept them?" My go to method is "helping" them. But unsolicited helping and accepting are two completely different directions.
So ... what's the fucking answer? Ugh. It would be nice to know how "normal" people think. I guess the answer is ... just showing up. Showing that I'm interested. Showing that I appreciate her for who she is. I accept her. I understand her.
And ... honestly ... I do understand her a hell of a lot better these days than before. I have ... deeper empathy for her and her own struggles as I've learned to look inwards at my struggles.
I can see the progress she has made. She is inspiring in so many ways. Makes me want to fix my own shit even faster lol.
None of it is easy. But it's getting easier.
So yes ... I encourage anyone who is looking to become more secure and self-confident, happy with themselves, to make a list, work the list, check in with yourself and assess progress, and give it time.
The anxiety in my mind is slowly quieting and I'm feeling better about my life and who I am. I find I no longer need the external validation as much.
The odd thing is ... now that I'm feeling better about myself, I also feel like I see others in a more realistic, full light.
It's so ... bizarre to say it but ... I like her better these days than I did before. I feel like I was objectifying her before. Yes ... I knew she was a living breathing person but ... I had her on a pedestal. It wasn't realistic or healthy for either of us.
So it's funny to recognize that my "like" for her has grown while my insane love has diminished.
And my "like" for my friends is also growing. I'm seeing the world in new lights.
I have a good friend on Discord who has been out of touch. It makes my anxious mind go brrrrrrrrr even though she said she was going to be super busy. I heard her ... but ... my anxiety kicks in and plagues me with so much nonsense and doubts and feelings of "I'm a fuck up."
Obviously I am still a work in progress. I take deep breaths, I walk through my Pride Journal to build self-confidence, I remember that people can and will speak up when they are ready, and other people's choices are not in my control.
I am me regardless of whether or not other people accept or reject me.
It's probably so obvious to most of you.
It's a silly thing to have to say ... even sillier to have to learn that you lived a life without understanding that basic concept.
Oh well. Learning and growing. Fast as I can.
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
The Princess and the Frog Chrobin AU... you don't know how hyped I was to read that.
I'm the exact opposite where I can't seem to write longfic. Do you have any suggestions for someone looking to try her hand at one?
Ohh I'm so glad that you're excited by the idea! 😊 Honestly there is such a tragic dearth of Birb!Robin content that I feel compelled to remedy it myself haha. And I think the fairytale-ish angle has a lot of fun / cute potential!
As for suggestions on getting into writing long fic, I certainly wouldn't consider myself an expert by any stretch, but I can tell you what has worked for me!
Find an idea that you *love* that just won't let you go
This, really, is the biggest tip I have. Obviously it's going to vary some based on the efficiency of the writer and just HOW long of a long fic we're talking about, but you're going to be thinking about and working on this fic for a long time. If that work isn't something you are extremely excited about, it's very quickly going to start to feel like a drag and become challenging to see through. Again, I can only speak to my own experience here, but I have thought about my long fics in some capacity for at least a few hours every day for the last two years (and often much much more than that LOL). Definitely I have days where I am not in the mood to write or I am not in a great head space with the fic and need to take a step back. But when all is said and done, it's still a story I am excited to tell and involves scenarios I *want* to have an excuse to think about all the time, day after day. If you're that excited about the ideas, I think that alone will carry you far!
2. Ask yourself why you want to write a long fic
To elaborate: what is it that a long fic allows you to do that you feel as though you can't accomplish in a shorter fic instead? Extensive world building? A more intricate plot? The answer to this question should drive a lot of your story conceptualization process. Honestly for me the biggest draws of long fic are how it lends itself to slow-burn, extensive opportunities for agonizing pining, and the ability to portray much more gradual character growth. Those are three of the things I love most in the fics and novels I read *and* three things that I love to write about. Because those things are such big priorities for me, the way I formed and built my story ideas around them was already very naturally geared towards long fic--I didn't have to try to fit it into that mold at all!
3. Find a good beta reader
Easier said than done, I know, but I genuinely think a fresh set of eyes / a brain to pick when you're stuck makes a world of difference. I cannot tell you how many times I have gotten myself into a deep rut with my long fics that I was convinced there was no way out of, or where I'd written a whole chapter draft that I thought was un-salvageable only for my beta reader to provide a very elegant solution / quickly pinpoint and direct me towards what wasn't working so that I wouldn't have to throw out the whole thing. One of the dangers with long fic is that you're working on it for so long that your sense of how things move and progress in the story and where they are going winds up being very divorced from the way readers experience it. Having someone else who can give you outside POV on what's working and what's not is invaluable during the drafting and revising process. Ideally that person would also have tastes that align well with your own and be someone who you can trust to be both honest and encouraging (even better if they know the characters of the world well and can give feedback from that angle too) but I do recognize perfect beta readers don't grow on trees. If not a full fledged beta reader, I think having a close friend or two who you can talk through the writers blocks or concerns with is helpful too!
4. Plan ahead but don't be afraid to change directions
Probably the most subjective piece of advice on here since I know different writers vary wildly with how much they like / need to plan ahead, but this is the combination that I've found has worked best for me. The reason being that if you don't do *some* more extensive idea generating and planning before hand I don't think it gives you anything to get hyped up about and look forward to. Having a big exciting moment in the story that you can't wait to write is a really good motivator, but unless you are very good at delayed gratification, brainstorming smaller moments along the way that are iddy and fun while still moving you closer to that big moment will be imperative for motivating yourself to stick it out long enough to get there. That being said, I don't think you have to feel locked into those early ideas either. Things are going to occur to you as you're writing that didn't during the planning stages. New ideas you like better, logistical bumps you didn't think to account for, the discovery that a character feels a different way about something than how you anticipated they would...there's a whole bunch of possibilities and all of them may wind up derailing your initial vision to varying degrees. And I think that's okay! Part of the writing process is re-discovering the world and characters from new angles...I honestly think it would be odd if that *didn't* impact the story's direction, at least a little! And generally I think those changes just tend to make the story even better in the end~
5. Let the fic be gratuitous and self-indulgent
Echoes of this are present in some of the previous pieces of advice, but I think it bears repeating as a separate (and final) point. Don't be afraid to pile on as many of your favorite tropes as you can!! Build your fic concept so that it includes lots of story beats and themes you're a sucker for every time. The more opportunities you find to load in things that you love, the more fun you'll have writing and thinking about the idea and the more likely it is that you'll both have an idea big enough to write a long fic for and that you'll be willing to stick it out and see it through to the end 💕
Okay...I think that's all I've got. This was so long and apologies if you were not looking for an answer anywhere near this detailed but, well, I did say I struggle to write anything short LOL Thank you for being interested enough in my perspective and experiences to ask in the first place! And I hope you'll find something I said here was helpful!
4 notes
·
View notes
Note
I'm a Zutara stan but I sometimes think Aang and Mai were what Katara and Zuko needed at one point. I just refuse to believe those relationships were a complete disaster for the both of them. I sometimes laugh/cringe at how salty some fics are towards their exes (because Zutara is canon!!) but I get it.. Zutara is treated much worse.
I get it and I would actually agree that there was merit to having them date at some point.
I graduated high school last week and with adulthood on the horizon, almost every single couple I know has broken up or is on the verge of breaking up. Sure, there are a few that are sticking it out and I'm sure that a few will make it past college and whatever comes next, but that amount will definitely be minuscule. The reality is most couples from grade school don't end up together--but that doesn't mean that those relationships are pointless, right? There's fundamentally a lot you can learn in a young relationship about yourself and what you want in your other relationships as you become an adult.
What bothers me about the endgame couples in ATLA is how young they are and how quickly they dedicate themselves to each other. Katara and Aang are generously the equivalents to a thirteen and fifteen-year-old, and Zuko and Mai are more like seventeen-year-olds. Because of that, I'd say the latter had more of a shot at making it, but still, that's super young.
And the fact that Katara is like, fifteen or sixteen in the comics and running around the world fully dedicated to her fourteen-year-old boyfriend? She's fifteen, her boyfriend should be secondary to her own growth.
But yeah, I agree that there was never anything wrong with Katara dating Aang and Zuko dating Mai. They were caught up in a war and maybe at some point Katara needed to date someone who gave her hope, and Zuko needed to be with someone who understood the societal pressure of being Fire Nation nobility. But that doesn't mean that they were compatible life partners, you know?
The most common criticism I see of Zutara that isn't flat out your ship is for teenage girls who love bad boys is that they wouldn't work because they're too similarly passionate. I think that this stems from The Southern Raiders which most Zutarians interpret as Zuko helping Katara get the revenge she needed, but a lot of other people see him encouraging her tendency to get carried away.
Katara and Zuko both often make brash decisions based on their own moral compasses and I like that. I think that similarity might have been an issue over some of ATLA and while they're young but as they grow (because they're literal young teens in ATLA) it could have been exactly what the world needed from young leaders.
And that's really why I believe they should be endgame because the whole opposite-personalties attract and "Aang and Mai keep Katara and Zuko in check" thing might be important and relevant when they're young but in the long run, matching personalities can compromise and understand each other better.
I'm not wholly Anti-Kataang and Anti-Maiko from what we see in the show, but I don't like the way the relationships are seen to progress. Aang is pushy with Katara in ATLA and then he never grows out of it and Katara just accepts it. And Zuko and Mai start to break apart and don't reconcile their differences (all this to say I haven't read the comics entirely and I do think Mai and Zuko definitely could have grown into a healthier relationship, we just don't see that). Maybe if the show had ended with Zutara I wouldn't have liked it because Zuko and Katara weren't ready to date at the end of ATLA. None of these characters were, they needed to deal with the trauma of the war and build healthy friendships and relationships with their families.
I'm sorry this answer is so ranty, I'm just getting out my feelings. I really hope the live action ATLA ends with no established relationships for any of these characters so that it's all open to interpretation. I just can't see how a bunch of relationships forged in wartime between twelve to sixteen-year-olds supposedly were all meant to be.
#zutara#AGAIN IM SO SORRY FOR RANTING#i have so many feels about all of this stuff#zuko#katara#antimaiko#antikataang#atla
47 notes
·
View notes
Note
Your meta WRT setting aside self-sacrifice and Yang possibly getting her new arm back as personal affirmation *seriously* reassures me if that bit turns out to be more than screencap extrapolation. Because otherwise I'd have a helluva time not finding that development pointlessly & repetitively cruel.
mm yeah
honestly i wouldn’t be *surprised* if it turns out to just be a trick of the angle in that screenshot making it appear the arm is missing—if only bc it’s unclear to me exactly how she would have lost it—but if it really is missing, an arc sort of building off of how reluctant yang is to consider her own needs is the only emotional trajectory that makes sense to me?
another strand of this that i’ve been teasing out in my head today is the last time yang “lost” the prosthetic arm, at the end of v5: she charges toward the vault’s entrance, mercury grabs her arm to stop her, and we see this beat of yang catching her instinctive reaction to turn around and punch him, and instead reining in her emotions and making the deliberate and much smarter choice of simply dropping the arm—which costs her nothing, because it’s clear that she has complete trust in her friends and family that they won’t let the baddies abscond with her arm; doing this doesn’t reawaken the horrible depression and hopelessness she felt after losing her original arm, she’s healed beyond that and fully come to terms with being an amputee! and immediately following this, she has the fraught confrontation with raven which sets up her emotional turmoil in v6.
so there’s already this thing of yang’s prosthetic arm and her relationship to it being used as a symbolic representation of positive emotional growth and healing, and if in v9 she loses or relinquishes the arm somehow, i think an arc involving yang getting it back wholly on her own terms and time would be a neat way to bring that full circle: the intense struggle she had to accept the prosthetic in the first place -> becoming comfortable with the realities of having a prosthetic arm -> not having it and confidently looking the universe in the eye to say “yup that’s my arm and i’m taking it back now.”
plus the obvious symbolic dovetailing with the more general emotional arc of yang needing to get better at taking care of herself and valuing herself as much as she values her friends 🤔
come to think of it, given that she DID have her arm when she fell, i wonder if she’ll choose to give it up early on for the sake of someone else, and then her realization that that choice harmed her becoming the catalyst for the emotional change?—like if she were to ‘trade’ the arm for information or help getting home while she’s still stranded alone, or something. (her team needs her and she can always get a new one when she gets back right!! so it’s fine it doesn’t matter!!—except once it’s done she finds that it super does matter and that wasn’t a price worth paying.) (something something…costs an arm and a leg?…except the leg is half-buried lingering trauma yang didn’t know she had)
there’s also—god—there’s a bit in aaiw where alice drinks something that makes her grow very large while trapped inside a small house, with the result that she gets stuck and has to shove one arm out the window because there isn’t any room left; and then the denizens outside get into a tizzy about what appears to them to be a disembodied giant arm sticking out of a window—with the ultimate conclusion being that they need to burn the house down to deal with the problem of the giant creature inside, at which point alice finds a way to shrink herself down again and escape. so i wonder if rwby might turn out to be vamping on that somehow, in the same way they’re vamping on the looking house garden and the pool of tears with ruby. a land that responds to tears by thunderstorming is a world that can make “setting yourself on fire to keep people warm” uncomfortably literal yk?
another neat possibility i’ve been kicking around is if the kids all have their isolated little adventures before they find each other—and if yang lost the arm during the fall itself—then it might be that yang’s first order of business upon waking up in wonderland, unaware that any of her teammates fell too, would naturally be to look for her arm? which could conceivably mean that team rwby’s reunion might look something like “yang keeps unexpectedly stumbling across her teammates while scouring the jungle in search of her arm” ksgdfjk—which’d be another neat way to invert the v4-5 thing of yang pushing herself back to functionality for the sake of rejoining her team, in that she would, in the absence of anyone else to focus on, have no choice but to prioritize her own needs, and in the course of doing that find more and more of the support she always could have had if only she’d let herself ask for it.
but yeah. i’m pretty optimistic that at a minimum if the lost prosthetic is for real it won’t be a retread of the v4 recovery arc, but rather a kind of… mirror image of it? in that i expect the emotional fulcrum will be active desire to recover/repair/replace the arm rather than grieving the lost one. and she’ll be surrounded by her team for most if not all of the process
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
Teaser Trailer
"Car's Outside" - A Series | Inspired from the song by James Arthur
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Driver!Reader
Summary: You're a struggling Formula 1 driver who joins Lewis Hamilton's family on a holiday, discovering unexpected connections and a sense of belonging that transcends the track and redefines your perspective on relationships and racing.
Trigger Warning/Content Advisory: Contains mature content and explores complex themes. Please be aware that it may also include scenes of high-speed racing, accidents, intense emotions, emotional conflicts, personal growth, and intimate moments. Reader discretion is advised.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Masterlist
You're a driver for the Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 team and your teammate is Lewis Hamilton. Lately, you've been experiencing a string of bad races with incidents like DNFs and collisions with other drivers. It's been frustrating for you and affecting your performance, and it's becoming apparent to everyone around you. After the worst race of your life, you're heading back to the paddock.
"For fuck's sake, why does it always have to be me?" you mutter.
Lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice Lewis's dad, Anthony Hamilton, waving at you on your way. You walk right past him until someone grabs your arm. Irritated, you shoot them a glare, but your eyes soften as you realize who it was.
"I've been calling out to you from a mile away. Where were you?" he chuckles.
"I'm not sure... I've been distracted by something," you respond, avoiding mentioning what happened earlier.
"Do you have a moment to talk?" he asks, seeming eager to share something.
"Um, yeah, sure," you reply, not fully engaged in the upcoming conversation.
He extends his arm in a gentlemanly way, and you take it, walking together toward the paddock. He leads you to a table where you both sit down.
"So..." he begins, looking at you and rubbing his hands.
"Um... hi?" you greet with a smile, unsure of what's happening.
"I know you've had a rough start, and I was thinking I could offer you some help."
"Oh, I'm fine. I don't think I need anything... um... yeah," you respond, feeling embarrassed and frustrated that Lewis Hamilton's dad has to address this with you.
"I can see it's been challenging for you, (Y/N). It's not about more training or spending time on the simulator. It's about finding a genuine love for what you do," he explains, pausing briefly and then smiling at you.
"What I'm saying is... I'm inviting you to join us for a little break from everything. It's Easter soon, and I know you usually prefer to have some time to yourself, but wouldn't it be better if you got closer to your teammate and have a change of view?"
You and Lewis have never been close friends, perhaps due to the chaos you've caused on the track or because you weren't good enough to be on the team, making him not even acknowledge your existence. You've never had a conversation or even exchanged a nod. Everything people see online is just PR to avoid any controversy.
What confuses you is the fact that you're being invited to their family holiday. You! Someone who has no connection to them whatsoever. Well, you and Anthony had formed a father-daughter bond. He would motivate and encourage you during race week. Your own family has never been close or supportive when it came to racing. Since then, you've worked hard for everything you have and have become independent, not relying on anyone.
You simply blink at his offer, lost for words.
"Lewis!" Anthony calls out as Lewis enters the paddock. "(Y/N) and I were just talking, and I invited her to join us on our holiday."
Lewis looks at his dad, eyebrows furrowed. "Um... Did you ask her, or are you taking her hostage?" He glances at you and then back at his dad.
"You can say no, you don't have to do everything he says," Lewis tells you without even looking in your direction.
"Um... yeah, I don't think I should disturb your family matter," you say, standing up and making your way to your driver's room.
Anthony lets out a disappointed sigh upon hearing Lewis's comments. "I told you she needs our support," he tells Lewis, his eyes filled with sadness.
"You don't know her well enough to know what she needs," Lewis retorts sharply, then turns and heads to his room.
✧ ･ﾟ : * ✧ ･ﾟ * ✧ ✦ ✧ * ✧ ･ﾟ : * ✧ ･ﾟ :
As you prepare to leave and head to the parking area, a smiling Anthony calls out to you from a distance. You jog over to him, not wanting to keep him waiting.
"Hey, I'm sorry for turning down your offer. I thought it might be awkward for..." you begin to explain.
"Oh no, you're coming!" Anthony interjects.
"What?"
"We're leaving right now," he informs you.
"Huh?"
He gently puts his arm around your shoulder and guides you towards a van. You spot Lewis sitting by the window, and Anthony nudges you to get in, making you sit between the two Hamiltons.
Initially, your thoughts race:
Wait... Where did he say we were going?
I don't have a bag with me...
Wait... Where is my passport?
Lewis remains silent, engrossed in his phone as you sit beside him. Anthony wears a smug smile, satisfied that his plan is unfolding as intended.
"Um... Thank you. I guess, for having me... I'm still not sure what's happening," you express, uncertain.
Anthony chuckles in response.
"Here." He hands you your bag. Opening it, you find your passport and other essential items for the airport.
"We are leaving?" you ask, staring at the contents of your open bag.
"But I don't have any clothes with me," you point out to him.
"I've already taken care of that. You'll get some once we arrive in London," he assures you.
"London?"
He smiles at you once more.
You glance at Lewis, who continues to ignore you, still fixated on his phone, unwilling to address the situation.
You take a deep breath. Well, at least I'm getting a free getaway, you think to yourself.
🌟 Welcome to the series! 🌟
You have the power to shape this story too! Share your questions, predictions, and ideas. Let's dive deeper into this journey together.
#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton blurb#lewis hamilton fanfic#lewis hamilton fanfics#lewis hamilton fanfiction#lewis hamilton fic#f1 lewis#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton x you#sir lewis hamilton#mercedes f1#lewis hamilton series#lewis hamilton imagine
162 notes
·
View notes
Text
Letting Go Of Love With Music
Letting go of someone you love can be one of the most painful experiences that a person can go through. It can feel like your heart is being ripped out of your chest, and every day can feel like a battle just to get through the day. Arolyn writes music about this. The truth is, letting go of someone you love is never easy. It takes time, patience, and a lot of self-reflection. You may find yourself constantly thinking about them, wondering what they are doing, or wishing things were different. But the reality is that holding onto someone who is no longer meant to be in your life will only cause you more pain and heartache in the long run. One of the first steps in letting go is accepting that the relationship is over. This can be incredibly difficult, especially if you were not the one who initiated the breakup. But the sooner you can come to terms with the fact that the relationship is over, the sooner you can start to move on. Another important step in letting go is to focus on your own personal growth and self-care. This means taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental health. You may find that exercising, meditating, or spending time with friends and family can help you to feel better and start to heal. It's also important to surround yourself with positive influences and people who support you. This may mean cutting ties with people who are toxic or who remind you of the person you are trying to let go of. Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Letting go of someone you love is never easy, and it's okay to feel sad or angry or frustrated. But remember that you are worthy of love and happiness, and that you will find it again in the future. Letting go of someone you love is a complex and emotional process that can take a toll on your mental and physical well-being. When you love someone deeply, it can be challenging to imagine life without them. It can feel like a part of you is missing, and every moment spent without them feels like a painful reminder of what you have lost. However, as difficult as it may be, letting go of someone you love is sometimes necessary. It may be due to irreconcilable differences, a lack of commitment, or simply because the relationship has run its course. Regardless of the reason, letting go is essential for your own growth and happiness. The first step in letting go is to accept the reality of the situation. This can be particularly challenging if you were blindsided by the breakup or are struggling to come to terms with the end of the relationship. Acknowledging that it is over and that you need to move on is the first step towards healing and recovery.
Tags:go goes let let go letting letting go letting go songs song songs songs about letting go went gratitude crowded house toxic relationship women empowerment prayers introvert extrovert dysfunctional family i will always love you whitney houston since u been gone dolly parton child kelly clarkson someone like you leona lewis halsey alesso alanis morissette how to save a life hilary duff everybody hurts the fray adele dua lipa avicii kellie pickler selena gomez green day irreplaceable i will survive sara evans james blunt watt Songs About Letting It Go Songs About Letting Go Songs About Letting Her Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone You Love Songs About Letting Someone Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone Songs About Letting Him Go Songs About Letting Go Of The Past Songs About Letting Go And Moving On florida georgia Songs About Letting It Go Songs About Letting Go Songs About Letting Her Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone You Love Songs About Letting Someone Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone Songs About Letting Him Go Songs About Letting Go Of The Past Songs About Letting Go And Moving On line rita ora bob dylan the first cut is the deepest cat stevens gloria gaynor jordin sparks bruce hornsby and the range rod stewart thinkin bout you justin bieber let it be mikky ekko tattoo britney spears sting bad religion phoebe bridgers two door cinema club mitski icu leith bon iver coldplay rock songs billie eilish prince hillary duff oasis fergie beyonc supertramp carrie underwood look back in anger love yourself sufjan stevens lana del rey sheryl crow sza kygo advance directive go your own way ooh la la end-of-life the ting tings regina spektor n sync alan jackson ben folds five happy ending frank ocean faith hill taylor swift bet the carpenters little mix fleetwood mac warrior bad blood fog avril lavigne death cab for cutie goodbye yellow brick road ain beyonce the beatles we are never ever getting back together atomic kitten katharine mcphee third eye blind scientist white flag dido rap madonna drake birdy country james bay kali uchis maroon 5 hip hop Songs About Letting It Go Songs About Letting Go Songs About Letting Her Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone You Love Songs About Letting Someone Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone Songs About Letting Him Go Songs About Letting Go Of The Past Songs About Letting Go And Moving On lauryn hill worship rihanna miley cyrus justin timberlake breakup blood song music love songs about about letting songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting go songs about about letting content letting to let like good clarkson always love songs about letting kelly breakup gone moving someone dolly parton to content goodbye to move about moving somebody whitney leaving ballad never something losing search stronger take girl finding child loss relationship better powerful break hurt kelly clarkson someone like songs popular until sometimes artist since before easy feelings finally destiny together loved strength is about this song post playlist great leona american rock whitney houston adele death move know swift hurts taylor yesterday heart experience lover someone you love life pain away by dolly songs about moving try always hard soul reason best songs about power anger past song about wrong way lyrics helps alanis learn felt hit duff lost lipa over house song despite again future alone making find listening gloria songwriter irreplaceable breakups lewis faith sad let Songs About Letting It Go Songs About Letting Go Songs About Letting Her Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone You Love Songs About Letting Someone Go Songs About Letting Go Of Someone Songs About Letting Him Go Songs About Letting Go Of The Past Songs About Letting Go And Moving On
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
30 Questions of CP, OC & Fandom★
Mun Ari: I was tagged by @kindan-no-kanojo and @mino-diabolik thank you!! (Credit to @mukami-kuron-mrsadisticcat)
1. How long have you been in this fandom?
I think around 2015-2016(?. 2015 is when I found DL anime, but it was until months later that I got interested with the decond seasom. I started here in tumblr in 2016 and until 2017 I stsrted my OC blog. So… 6-7 years? Oh my…that much? 😳
2. Who's your fictional boyfriend/husband?
Kino my love <3. Since he made his appearance in 2017 and I read his route… puff! I'm in love~ lol. Up until now he has remind as my #1 husbando <3
3. Why do you like them?
For many reasons: we share some things from our past, so I can relate to him for that reason. Also, he's so funny (I love his sense of humor lol), how intelligent and witty he is (I love his role as the villain jijij), how childish and spoiled he can act, we share some hobbies and of course his appeareance and voice makes me weak! Also he's a cutie when he wants, I can't >////<
4. Have you make acquaintance with anyone that ships themselves with the same character?
Hell yeah! @mino-diabolik @kindan-no-kanojo and @eli-loversblog we are all happy members of Kino's harem jijijij
5. How do you feel about it?
Happy and proud. Kino is such a misunderstood character and therefore his fan base is so tiny!! So whenever I find someone that loves Kino AND has an OC with him is like another tiny victory!!
6. Do you feel any negativity towards them?
No? So far I've encounter very few Kino fans, but none has been toxic or something similar 🤷🏻♀️.
7. Do you like seeing their oc(s) interact with your man/woman?
As interact with Kino? Or with my OC? Or with both? The answer to all three is: absolutely yes! Kino deserves so much love and every new fan is great news! With Ari makes me feel super super happy for her to be loved and noticed! And with both as a couple makes my heart go 💗💗💗
8. Do you feel competitive against them?
I must admit that when I started I felt a little jealous with some (that are not longer active as far as I know) since they had more support and had the plus to be great artists so bring their ship's dream to reality.
Of course I got over it super fast and I focused on my own personal growth and so far I'm extremely happy to see more people liking and shipping Kino with their OCs!!
9. Confident, or pessimistic?
Eh? About what? My ship? If it's so then... neutral? I mean there were better times for the DL OC community, but understand that times changes and I'm busy with real life responsibilities, so I can't dedicate the time I use to give this blog. Of course is natural people left, others came and I stayed and to pass unnoticed is due to my lack of activity/interactions and such.
So is a 50/50. There are good days and bad ones.
10. Would you like more to get to know about your ship, or would you rather it being lowkey?
Honestly? I miss the old days and I wish I could be more active. But there are so much new people and my some friends are now gone... that I feel anxious. I'm super shy when it comes to socialize and interact with new people + my reduced time online... that is very hard for me. So, I would love to interact more, but I'm shy >/////<
11. Do you follow any of those people (them whom ship themselves with your fictional lover)
Of course! I try to send them asks from time to time and I always check them out whenever I enter here!
12. Are you friends with them?
I'd like to think that ;u; (I have interacted with their Muns and I talk to some more than others jejeje)
13. What do you think about the 'stans' ?
Good question... I'm not sure I know what it means 100%. I deduce you mean those who 'stan' a character as their fans(?.
I think everything in measure and balance is totally OK. You can ship yourself or an OC with them and be creative or have fun! HOWEVER! If your love becomes and obsession and it starts hurting or bothering others... then we have a problem. Is an issue when people believes they 'own' the character or are passive-aggressive with other fans. Excuses as 'I love them more than you do!' Or 'I'm the only one to understand them!' Or 'I'm their only and true girlfriend' is like: Get yourself a therapy~ you're desillusional 🤦🏻♀️
14. Are you worried about plagiarism or copying of your oc(s) by others?
There is always that risk. It does annoys me since is a work/creation I made myself and it took me time, work and even money to create.
It did happened to me not long ago that a person took a commission I payed and edited it to put her OC. She made a TERRIBLE work editing it (you know with paint or even Instagram colors), but fortunately she "vanished".
I'm low-key afraid some might steal any of my fanfics and post them as theirs in other platforms though... but I'm not that relevant or famous to worry about that lol. And I haven't made any commissions lately and I haven't seen my commissions around or edited so... I guess I'm fine?
15. How do you handle such a situation if it happens?
A friend was who told me about it and we both worked together to solve it (she was also a victim of that girl as she stole her OC almost everything [appearance, name, ship...] and in my case my commission). As I know what it feels like I try to tell the corresponding authors of the original piece if they are being victims of stealing so we can all work together to solve it.
16. Is your cp public or only between a particular circle of friends?
I'll assume my blog/ship. The answer is public: at this point many know my blog and OC lol.
17. Do you lock a specific cp ship, whats the reason? (I dare you to tag them~!)
Nop. So far I haven't block anyone.
18. What kind of behaviors do you suppose is pretentious to you?
If I understand correectly this question.... I think you mean attitudes that I don't like in fans?
I'll answer as such: I don't like when people thinks they can own a character or many just because they have theirs ocs paired with them. If they are all bark no bite, then you can just ignore them... but if they are those people that actually harass others that pisses me off. I don't get involve in online confrontations (cause' is pathetic really), unless they are attacking friends of mine in a very mean way. I'm ready to thows hands!
ALSO the thieves or tracers also annoys me, becuase their arguments and actions are stupid. 'I found them online! So I shared it!', 'I'm doing them a favor by posting it in my profile!' or 'Who are you to tell me what to do? I post what I want!'. UGH! HATE THEM! If you don't know how to draw: DON'T POST OTHER'S WORK!
Overall, I just find annoying those people that are immature or mean in general so I just avoid them.
19. What kind of comments do you dislike the most when it comes cp feedbacks of your oc(s)?
I haven't encounter any of the sort directed to me specifically? But I've seen what haters are willing to do.
I hate when they simply critize the OC in question with their stupid opinions like: 'I don't like your OC because is not pretty', 'she's ugly', 'she's a Marie Sue', 'she's a cheap copy of *insert character*', 'you need to improve your skills', or the best one 'I don't like your OC, stop shring her!' etc. Like: SHUT UP! NO ONE ASKED YOU. IF YOU DON'T LIKE A SHIP SIMPLY UNFOLLOW OR BLOCK. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR DAMN OPINION.
20. Have you receive hates about your oc(s) before?
nop, thankfully. But if I encounter one, I'll simply block them~
21. Do you have a complete love story of your cp?
yep! Well... the official route is still incomplete lol. I'm missing some endings, but I haven't come up with something .-.
BUT I have created so many AUs that is impressive how many lives they have lived and fallen in love with :'D
22. Do you allow joint of alternate universe with the canon version of your cp story?
I just said it: AUs rock! I love them! ENDLESS POSSIBILITIES TO EXPLORE AND ENJOY FOR YOUR SHIP!!
Seriously, every idea has so much potential! that's why I have written so many~!
Don't hesitate to add Ari to any of your AUs!!!
23. Are you okay with people shipping their oc(s) with yours?
Sure! Sometims it's me who begs my Ari to be ship with others ocs [Mystic I'm looking at you!], but I haven't had luck(?
24. Ever gone through a bad experience in the fandom?
Not really(? Unless I have already forgotten or never noticed(?
25. The ocs that you admire in this fandom are? (Tag them~)
@kindan-no-kanojo (have you seen Scarlett? She's an icon! Her character is 100/10!)
@mino-diabolik (she has endure and survive the pass of time and Mystic is loved by many! #goals)
@violet-sin (she's not longer in the fandom nor tumblr, but all her OCs are magnificent!! Also, I was witness of her artists skills improvement and now I love her style!!)
@vixen-ocs (not longer in DL, but her self-insert was super pretty! I loved her!)
@eli-loversblog (she wasn't around for very long, but I liked her OC. I wished we could have interacted more ;-;)
@the-sloth-woman (she took the inicial idea [DL verse] and created an impire of her own... that's some mad skills. Also her writting talent is amazing!)
@invampirehellorheaven (not sure if she's still around [in this blog and her OC I mean], but she was an interesting character to interact with :D)
@lets-bewitched (she's more active on Instagram and we are good friends! I like Seina a hell lot!)
@lunaangel1010universe (Amina is lovely! Plus all her art pieces are amazing! I love how her story has development and even the many AU she already has!)
26. What is the moment that caused you to feel most disappointed or excited?
Excited? When the fandom was more active and many ocs interacted with each other! It was so much fun!
Sad? When all this stopped :'(
27. The scariest era that you have come across in the fandom?
The OCs war. The trinity of caos that existed in the fandom and all the people they scared due to this >:'v
28. The most wonderful thing you have come across in this fandom?
My friends that support me in all my blogs:
@sugar-lollipop @the-sloth-woman @kindan-no-kanojo @mino-diabolik @lunaangel1010universe @lets-bewitched and more <3
29. Say something towards those that support and admire your cp~
THANK YOU. YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME. YOU INSPIRE ME TO KEEP CREATING AND DO WHAT I LOVE!! I ADORE YOU ALL SINCE YOU ARE ALSO GOOD FRIENDS OUTSIDE TUMBLR!!! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH YOUR SUPPORT MEANS TO ME. IF MY DAY WAS A 25 OR A 50 YOU MAKE IT A 100!! THANK YOU!!!
30. You've worked hard, keep up the good work! ★★★
#ariadnasdiary#mun ari speaks#tag#30 questions of CP OC & fandom tag#thank you for the tag!#diabolik lovers oc
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
February 🐉 2023 Monthly - Libra
Whole of your energy: 8 Wands
There are difficulties with people around you this month, but for the most part you’ve got a great opportunity for something related to work and it’s a wonderful thing. Don’t let yourself get mixed up in negativity, your color cards and Oracle point you towards happiness & growth, whatever is occurring is a good thing.
What’s going on in February:
6 Swords:
This could be travel, 8 Wands too, you’re likely traveling for work or are being offered opportunities somewhere else, whether temporary or not, you’re expanding locations. 9 Cups shows this is exactly what you’ve been wanting and hoping for, you’re trying to get clarity on all of the details and whatnots involved, but you’re very happy. Keep that energy 💯
6 Cups rev:
This is a card of getting over the past, and more than that, with 4 Cups & Page of Pentacles, it feels like progress, finally, where before there might not have been much on offer at all. Maybe you’ve passed this one up before, but won’t a second time. It seems like this decision is an easy one for you and you’re happy to plan how it all works out.
Queen of Cups:
You have the King & Queen of Wands, both reversed, in the next rows, these people are a source of difficulty for you. Queen of Cups feels more like your own energy, doesn’t have to be. This is a person that’s kind, deeply loving, sentimental, nurturing, a very good & caring friend. If this is not you, it’s someone that’s going to work together with you to make this thing happen. If this is you, then this opportunity is possibly destined for you and satisfying on a very deep & emotional level.
Queen of Wands rev:
The first of the contention, they could be a couple, possibly parents, fire signs, friends of yours. It could be this Queen of Cups’ energy, acting jealous, domineering, bratty & bossy…because their friend is moving away, changing something, going to be away for awhile. They’re not initially* happy for you, you could be shaking up their world as well as your own. This could also be your own energy, if all of this is switched and you’re not happy for a friend.
5 Swords rev:
Whoever is acting up is apologizing for it, specifically any dominating, bossy & arrogant behavior. They’ll get over it, you two will work it out. The Emperor shows this person as either normally mature and acting out of character, or they’re trying to be the bigger person and realize they’ll just miss you or they’re worried about you, it’s not *your* fault. Especially if this is a parent. Healing is possible, don’t take people’s bs to heart, or you’ll have to apologize yourself if this is all switched. This could just be saying any conflict and issues you’ve had with your work or people in your life are healing & becoming better because of this. It’s also possible you’re not going anywhere, but there’s an opportunity for a fresh start, and a clean slate in relationships. The underlying message is happiness, moving on to better things, new things, possible travel, new experiences 🌺
Signs you may be dealing with:
Scorpio, Sagittarius, Pisces, Aquarius, Cancer & Aries
Oracles: ✨
42 Joy 🎉
We are created in joy. The balance of energy and higher vibrations brings us closer to divine love - pure joy. Joy can be a destination, but it can also be the vehicle that you use to get to that destination. Faith, grace, gratitude, and love all merge together, at different times and in different amounts, to create joy. There is love, growth, tears, change, and self-realization in this card. This card portends a happy and joyous time.
We enter into February as:
Rhonda Rhino of Amethyst 🦏:
“The road to divinity is paved in forgiveness.”
The true essence of Rhonda is that her dreams came true because she never harbored resentment, this card is about forgiveness. Because she didn’t take her mother’s suffering personally, she didn’t have to work it out. There is a lightness to staying reasonably detached from another’s anger & pain. We only need to forgive ourselves if we have judged others. Rhonda focuses on what her dream is, not what others have done to her, she is the essence of goodness and forgiveness, nothing changed that about her.
What is to be learned in February:
Geranium 🌺:
“This is another beginning.”
What appears to be an end may not be one after all. Often situations that generate our greatest fears turn into remarkable opportunities. It’s time to let go of the past, and trust that whatever is coming is better than what you’ve known to this point. You are ready to begin again. A new opportunity is coming from a place you don’t expect. There is a regeneration of some kind going on. Whatever you were pulled away from in the past was for the purpose of bringing you to a higher place. It’s time for whatever has been dormant to bloom again. Trust there is a higher plan. This is truly an exciting time.
Red may be a lucky color ❤️
#libra tarot reading#monthly reading#february 2023#Libra#monthly#tarot#astro notes#astro observations#astroblr#tarotblr
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
Since Amber's birthday is coming up, I've been looking for inspirational quotes by Amber/Amy and I can't seem to find any. It's hard for me to believe they're, and I'm sure you all can help me find some. Thanks!
Thanks for your question! I had fun scrolling through the numerous quotes of Amber's I've shared throughout the years, and I felt so empowered and inspired by her words!
Listed below are some of my favorite Amber quotes. Majority of them came from her comments on Instagram:
"I try to inspire those around me with positive actions and motivation."
"If you have a passion, it’s always a good idea to work towards it. Do your homework. Find something similar in your area and go volunteer there. [Research] online and see the triumph and the weak spots of those who are doing it. In order to succeed you must identify why others have failed. Gain as much information and experience as you can and you will then be closer to understanding what your ultimate goal is."
"I'm kind of a person that when I want to do something I just go do it. So I don't really have a bucket list because anything that I'm like 'Oh, that would be fun,' I try to do it."
"Just like anything in life, when you make true friends you will always keep in contact with them no matter where you end up. I will miss Heartland when it's over, but I'm sure I will still see those who I became close with."
"I believe that the values presented in Heartland resonate with any human being, no matter where they were brought up. The strong sense of family, honesty, and a genuine love for animals is universal. I am so proud to be a part of a show that has such a positive message."
"My advise to you is to not try and be anyone else. Know inside what goals and morals are important to you."
"Always think of the consequences of your actions and the potential effect it can have on someone. I've got a thick skull and I'm at the age now where most things are "water off a ducks back" as they say. But I do remember a time in my teenage years when words hurt a lot more. Be aware of the impressions you leave with those around you."
"I'm just always looking at the world as a perfect picture. I see great photos everywhere I look!"
"I can't promise you that I wont ever change, as I'm growing, learning and changing each and every day. I can promise that I will always try to live honestly and be the best version of myself."
"Life isn't about matching you with who you look best with, it's about finding that person that you ARE your best with."
"Friendship is a key component of our own personal growth. When we meet new people, we see the world through a different perspective. By staying open to their views we can better shape our own journey through life."
"Know that you can do anything you put your mind to. It is only your own limitations standing in your way. Don't just grab your horse by the reins.... Take the reins on life and don't be afraid to push forward."
"When the goal in life is to be noticed, you will forever be chasing an ungraspable dream. Notice yourself, your presence in the company of those around you, and you will obtain admiration as opposed to frustration."
"In life's journey there will be many things that are not what you expected. Some will turn out better than you could have ever imagined, and some will let you down. The key is to remain positive. Letting negativity cloud all your decisions will limit you from ever seeing something that is great."
"I try to step outside my comfort zone anytime an opportunity presents itself. That way the next time I'm in that position, it's no longer new or scary!"
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
Character Bio - Hills Johannes
For Johannes everything in life was to be held in high standards. To be human is to have the capacity to grow and excel so to settle for less was, in his view, total abdication at considering yourself "human".
And he considers himself "human".
Johannes is a very talented and capable individual. His dedication towards bettering himself could have been seen as a great virtue if not for his incredibly anti-social personality. If someone wasn't up to the same work ethic and disposition as him then he didn't even bother to acknowledge them. Prideful and unwilling to compromise or make concessions, his propensity to criticize or make unmprompted sardonical observations evoked dislike and enmity from his peers who tried to bring him down or deride him in retaliation, which made Johannes, in turn, hold an even bigger contempt toward others.
Then he met Miller.
The first person he ever saw as an equal and worth of his respect and admiration. Someone that finally listened to reason and wasn't afraid at acknowledging their shortcomings for the sake of their growth. A dignified and strong person who encompased- No. Who defined the concept of "power" to him.
An incredible, unparalleled and desirable woman.
It started from simple respect and admiration, but with time it grew into an intense fixation and yearning. A possessive hunger, an uncontrollable want, a mad and obsessive love that would led to his ruin when, crazed by his intense paranoia and jealousy towards Hunter's bond with Miller, he would end, with his own hands, destroying everything he had with her.
And yet, despite what he did, Miller didn't abandon him.
It's what made Johannes finally realize how utterly selfish he was. How disrespectful he was towards Miller's feelings and even his own.
While still not the easiest person to be around Johannes became less antagonic after his death, choosing to focus his efforts in aiding and supporting Miller from this point on.
Relationships:
Crowa Miller
The first person he grew to respect and admire. Someone he had a rather unusual "boss and subordinate" dynamic with as they treated each other more akin to equals, which developed in time in an intense and all consuming passion and love fueled by desire.
He wasn't aware that his feelings were reciprocrated due to his jealousy. ONLY after his death that he became aware of it. However he doesn't press the issue and doesn't try to pursue her afterwards out of a desire to not have Miller's future be wasted on someone that doesn't have one and CAN'T provide one for her.
Wolf Hunter
A man he detested at first for disrespecting and antagonizing Miller and then later on for the perceived notion of him being a potential rival for Miller's heart.
After his death he's in more cordial terms with Hunter because he acknowledges that if there's someone capable of giving Miller the future she deserves then it's him.
Daniel Andrews
He looks down on Andrews for being everything he abhors. Namely "losers that had given up and can't be half-assed to try"
And that's not only because of how he was as Miller's partner in the past.
The only reason to why Johannes had forwent pursuing Miller was for being dead otherwise he would still kept trying until it was made clear to him that he had no chance so to have Andrews deciding on not doing anything about his feelings despite being alive and even pushing for a rival to succeed made him a "coward" in Johannes eyes.
Svi Morrigan
Despite being a personal enemy for both him and Miller Johannes oddly enough has a weird sense of respect for him.
Perhaps for their kindred dislike at displays of "false power" or maybe for their unwillingness to debase themselves at the cost of their own pride. Regardless of the motive Johannes does acknowledge that their interests align enough that had they met in different circumstances and before he had met Miller he would have probably considered dating Morrigan.
Howl Miller-Hunter
Contrary to Andrews' consternation, Johannes is deeply amused by Howl regarding him as a "father" and isn't half bad at acting "parental" either. He can be surprisingly patient and good at teaching whenever Howl seeks his advice.
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
everycloudinatla
Every Cloud In Atla
prettylittl3kitty
Untitled
ukrainian-culture
Ukraine
ariose-ambrose
Pretty Boy Puppy
salehhxo
☪