Tumgik
#this is your reminder that this blog is run by a super gay person
Text
Tumblr media
anyone else still delulu about them after TMMN or is it just me
153 notes · View notes
iammikedee · 2 years
Text
1 year post-op
Firstly, I’m one year post op which is INSANE. I started this blog on day 1 of my transition, pre-everything, like even pre “Mike”, and now it’s been a year since top surgery. Like...whaaaaat????
You know how some parts of your life leave you with this feeling of nostalgia that’s almost tangible? Like when the weather is right, you go back to your childhood and get that feeling of playing in the sprinklers with your friends, or when it’s rainy it feels like the town you used to live in, etc. etc. Top surgery hardcore gave me happy nostalgia atmosphere. The weather right now reminds me of being in San Francisco, feeling super tiny underneath all the buildings, exploring the city the day before my surgery; coming to in the hotel room and watching Bo Burnham’s Inside special with a stupid smile on my face, then calling a friend and discussing which D&D class Shrek would be; hugging a pillow on the ride home so the seatbelt wouldn’t dig into my chest; calling my boss from a weird pizza place the day I got my drains out, saying “Hey, remember how I said I’d feel fine after getting my drains out? Yyyeahhhh no, I’mma take tomorrow off, also, don’t get lost in Folsom, there’s nothing for you here” and him laughing saying he went there for a puppy training class; sitting on the couch playing Fallout 3, bitching about how I have to install 5 things just to run the stupid game on Steam; being careful not to move too much because of my drains, and adjusting my compression binder so the seam isn’t digging into my sides; people from my church bringing me home made meals that are supposed to be low sodium but everything is covered in cheese because Lutherans be Lutherans. I LOVED top surgery. It was one of the best things that ever happened to me.
My scars have lightened considerably though they are still obvious. My nips are pretty symmetrical, and I’m really glad I got the nipple graft. I thought about no nips and some of my friends went that route, but I really do enjoy having nipples. 
A lot has happened in the last year too. The bar I did drag and burlesque was sold by the owner and shut down. It was our towns only gay bar. Fortunately, a new bar (like they recently opened) adopted all the lost gays and we have a home there. While I LOVED the last bar, this is a much better fit for our troupe in a much more stable environment. I already have so many happy memories there.
I’m getting married in 5 months. I’m starting to really freak out, not because I’m getting married but because a wedding is a HUGE time + financial + mental commitment. Like, we haven’t even picked our clothes, and this is a 100+ person wedding. And we have no money. This is going to be interesting. The fuck we gonna feed these people, pizza?
My partner didn’t pass the California state BAR the first time around (which is the case 60% of the time, CA has a 60% fail rate). He’s been studying his ass off, and working, and he’s taking the BAR again in July. He was like 10 points away from passing last time. I’m more confident than he is that he’ll pass, but I know all about passing, so he should listen to me :)
3 notes · View notes
thatredheadwriter · 3 years
Note
Hi! I saw your requests are open and I was wondering if you would wanna write something with Peter Parker x reader where y/n is super nice and understanding to everyone around them and basically lets people walk all over them and they give 110% to everyone but doesn’t always get that back and at some point something pushes them over the edge so they goes to a party or something and gets super drunk and not acting like themselves and Peter finds them and they breaks down and cries “what about me?!” Very dramatic of them lol (I identify as her so I’m sorry if one crept in, I tried to make it gender fluid!)
Overworked
Hey anon! Hope this lives up to your expectations, and sorry it took me so long.
This fic is not NSFW, however, my blog is only for those 18+ as a general rule. Do not re-publish or cross post without my explicit written permission (reposts with credit are ok). All characters are over the legal drinking age.
Warnings/mentions of:
drinking
family issues
job stress
swearing
(Y/N) = your name
(y/g/p/s) = your gender preference sibling term (i.e. brother, sister, sibling)
(y/p/n) = your pronoun
(Author's Note: This was fun to write, and I'm sorry it took me forever! I just really wanted to get it right. I did my best to keep it gender neutral, but just for future reference, you can request whatever pronouns you like for the reader! I'm personally she/her, so I enjoyed getting a little out of my comfort zone and trying to write a gender neutral reader.)
Tumblr media
"Yeah...of course...I'll be there," you waited for your mom to finish talking. She was throwing your sister's baby shower this weekend at some restaurant in midtown and she was insisting you stop by, even though you were working all night the night before. "I love you too, mom. Bye."
You couldn't exactly tell her you'd be running mission control for a small covert operation into a recently reactivated Hydra base. And that you'd be sitting in the same desk chair for nearly twenty hours from take-off to touch down. And that the whole time you would be worried about the lives of your closest friends in the world.
Sure, your family and friends knew you worked for Stark Industries, but they had no clue how you really earned your pay. Your cover was that you were an event manager, and it wasn't a total lie, you managed a lot of events.
"Hey, can I ask you something?" Nat poked her head into your office. You smiled tiredly and the unusually bubbly redhead sank into one of your office chairs. "I am planning a she’s, gay’s, and they’s, night, not optional," she added before you could protest,"We're going to celebrate a successful mission, and my latest birthday."
"Nat, I really don't think I..."
"No buts. Please, for me?" she faux pouted, and you sighed, giving in.
"Great, we'll meet in the lobby at eight. Make sure to wear something sexy," she stood up from her seat and left so fast it left your head spinning.
The rest of your afternoon consisted of you running all over the tower. Upstairs to find Tony and ask a question about the new tech, downstairs to talk to Steve about the plans to enter the base (and to remind him he is REQUIRED to wear a parachute anytime he jumps out of or off of something greater than a three story building). Then you had to find Nat again, which given her burst of energy was difficult even with FRIDAY's help. By the time you were finished it was ten o'clock and your stomach was growling.
You met Peter in the elevator, and immediately remembered you had agreed to watch the most recent few episodes of the Mandalorian with him, and you groaned. All you wanted was to go upstairs to your apartment, eat a bowl of macaroni and cheese, and collapse into bed. Not to mention you had an 8:00 am meeting with some people from the DOJ that Tony had asked you to attend.
"Hey, you ready to start watching?" he asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet.
"Yeah, yeah. Do you care if we order takeout? I'm starving," you groaned as you pressed the button for Peter's floor.
"Oh, well, I already ate, but you should definitely order something. Are you okay? You seem kind of off."
"I'm fine, just tired," you leaned your head back on the cold metal and shut your eyes for a moment.
"Do you want to reschedule?" Peter shifted slightly trying to catch your eye.
"No, no. I'm fine. Let me just get some food in me and I'll be good."
You were not good. After downing some lukewarm noodles from the only Thai place still open and delivering in your area, you settled in next to Peter on the couch in his apartment. It wasn't fifteen minutes into the first episode that you were out.
Pete woke you gently, trying not to startle you. You woke up slowly and blinked the sleep out of your eyes. Peter's gray shirt had a small dark stain over his chest, and you realized that you'd been drooling.
"Oh my god, Peter. I'm so sorry."
"This," he looked down at the spot and laughed a bit, "It's fine, no big deal. You were also snoring."
You buried your face in your hands, wishing you could curl into a ball and disappear. Peter's hands found your wrists and gently pulled them down. You could see he was still smiling, though softly now.
"Hey, hey. It's okay. You just need some sleep."
"You're right," you said rubbing your face. You stood from the couch and stretched. Peter looked like he wanted to say something, but he didn't. "I'm sorry I fell asleep, let's try again later. If that's okay with you."
"Yeah, I'm free tomorrow night."
"No can do, I'll be power-napping. I'm running mission coms for Steve, Nat, Sam, Bucky, and Clint. They're going to scope out that re-opened Hydra base in Argentina."
"Ok, what about the night after that?"
"I've got a baby shower in the afternoon and then Nat's dragging me out to a mandatory ‘she’s, gay’s, and they’s’ night."
"Damn, and I thought I was busy."
You sighed in defeat, "We'll figure it out some other time, okay?"
"Okay. Just get some sleep," he said softly, and you nodded.
Tumblr media
The next morning, you woke up only thirty minutes before you were due downstairs at one of the biggest meetings of your life. You hurriedly fixed your hair and pulled on your best business suit and made a beeline for the elevator. Once inside you popped a stick of gum in your mouth and cursed not showering the night before. But you figured after the meeting you could slip back upstairs and really get ready for the day.
You practically slid into the conference room, out of breath and hoping you didn't look too insane. Tony looked at you, a little concerned, and introduced you to the five members of the U.S. Department of Justice. You had no clue as to why Stark insisted you join the meeting, as you were clearly out of your depth. He only referred to you twice during the meeting and one time you didn't even know the answer to his question.
"Thanks for coming," he'd addressed you after the visitors left, "I wanted your opinion of some of their surveillance proposals, since you run coms on a lot of our recon missions."
You thumbed through the documents you'd collected during the meeting, "Yeah, I'll look over everything."
"Great, we'll meet on Monday afternoon and go over what you think."
You really just wanted to stay in your apartment for the rest of the day, but you had at least two more things to do before you could get in bed for a power nap. A quick shower helped you feel more awake and you grabbed a bagel and your usual coffee before heading to your office. First you had to file a few reports, one of which was past due. After three hours of paperwork you had to go down to the coms center and get the space ready for your long haul shift and double check all the tech the team would be using.
You were just finishing making your checklist when your watch started buzzing like crazy. It was an S.O.S. signal coming from Ned. So since you were in the center, you activated the console and called him.
"(Y/N), are you there?" he asked, sounding really frantic. You could hear metal crashing in the background and something that sounded like screaming.
"Yeah, Ned, I'm here. What's going on?"
"Well, Peter and I were over at this comic shop on Staten Island to check out the newest issue of..."
"Ned, get to the point faster, please," you blew stray hairs out of your face.
"Right. Peter's fighting a lava monster."
"A lava monster?"
"Yeah, I guess. I'm not really sure. We're over on Staten Island. I'm trying to help out as much as I can, but I don't have my tech."
"Ok, I've got your location. I'm going to patch into Pete's coms and try to help him from here. Get to safety, Ned. I'm going to mute our connection so I can focus on Peter, but I'll still be on the line."
You tapped furiously on the console, fingers flying over it as you sent commands and searched information relevant to the area. Moments later, you had tapped into Peter's suit so you could hear and see what he sees.
"Peter, can you hear me?" you asked, trying to make your voice as clear and enunciated as possible.
The video feed on the screen in front of you shook a bit, as Pete wasn't expecting to hear your voice.
"(Y/N), is that you?" he yelled, and you scrambled to turn down the volume coming out of the speakers.
"Yeah, Ned called me. Lava monster?"
"I think so. I was able to clear out most of the citizens."
"Okay, let's do this then."
You stayed on coms with Pete until he finally subdued the 'lava monster.' Turns out it was just a jewel thief who got his hands on some high tech and decided to take a hint from the Scooby Doo villains. When you finally turned the console off, you headed upstairs to intercept Peter for a debriefing. You learned that if you didn't debrief right after a mission or incident, it really made paperwork a bitch.
Peter swung in on the landing pad to find you already waiting for him. You noticed he was limping a little bit, so you stopped him, knowing he'd never go to the infirmary of his own volition.
"Peter, are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," he said, but the grimace on his face and the way he was holding his side told you he really wasn't.
"Let me see," you demanded, and Pete dropped his hands from his side with a hiss to reveal a portion of his suit had been burned away, and underneath you could see red, charred flesh.
"Oh my god, Peter!" you gasped, covering your mouth with your hands. You weren't a squeamish person, you couldn't be with your job, but you felt bile rising in your throat. "I am taking you to the infirmary right now."
He started to protest, but you weren't having any of that.
"Don't make me get Stark involved," you warned, and he sighed. You led the way to the elevators, and told FRIDAY to bypass any other floors.
You sat with Peter as he got checked out and bandaged up. Luckily he did have the advantage of rapid healing, but the doctor who treated him warned him to take it easy for the next week. An hour later and you followed him back to the elevator. He was holding his suit and looking at it pitifully.
"Tony's definitely going to know. At least if you want your suit fixed. Hey, but at least you went to the infirmary and got checked out. That'll shorten the lecture by at least five minutes."
"Yeah, well, it'll still be a long lecture. Do you have time to grab something to eat?"
"I wish. I still have to finish prepping for the mission."
"Okay, well good luck."
"You too."
You and Peter took separate elevators, he went up to the residential floors and you were headed back down to the communications room. Finally you were able to work in peace and get everything done you needed to. You checked your watch, it was six. Perfect timing, you could go upstairs, get comfy, order some good takeout food, eat well, and then get into bed early. You were practically drooling at the thought of a good nights' rest. In the elevator you did a little happy dance, it was all coming together. But of course you celebrated too soon.
A blaring alarm came over the speaker in the elevator, and you felt it change directions. An automated voice began repeating evacuation instructions over the intercom and you felt like you could cry. Once the elevator opened on the ground floor, you started looking for someone who could give you some answers, like when you would be able to get home.
It wasn't until 9:00 that night that your were allowed back into the building. You'd killed time by taking a taxi to the nearest big box store and getting a card and a gift for your sister's baby shower, ticking that box for the weekend. You were going to have a couple of hotdogs, but the vendor was cash only and you were out. You'd given the last of it in a loan to Clint. So you went back to wait with the others who needed to get into the tower.
You caught the elevator up with Bucky and Sam. They were in a much better mood than you were, and were way too loud about it.
"Hey, maybe (Y/N) can help," you heard Sam say as they entered the elevator. You groaned internally thinking, "no, (Y/N) cannot help you." But instead you simply sighed and waited to see what they could possibly want from you.
"Ok, so we're trying to figure out how to get Nat for her birthday."
"Get Nat?" you asked, already wary as to what you were being dragged into.
"Yeah," Bucky started, leaning back on the elevator wall, "we're trying to think of a way to prank her."
"A prank for her birthday? Do you want her to kill you?"
"No, it's not really a prank," Sam corrected, "We just want to surprise her a little bit."
"So get her something nice."
"It's her birthday, she'll be expecting to get gifts. We want to do something, uh, what's that word Sam?
"Extra," Sam finished for him.
So instead of going to bed like you should have, and they should have thinking back on it, you ended up in the shared common area trying to help them figure out what she would like.
An hour and a half later they finally let you go. You dragged your lifeless body into the apartment and kicked the door shut behind you lazily.
In the kitchen, you made a couple of peanut butter sandwiches and poured yourself a large glass of milk. You ate quickly, given that you were starving, and went straight to the shower, not counting on waking up early enough to do it in the morning.
After the shower, you were ready to collapse into bed. You'd just pulled back the duvet when you heard a knock at your front door. With a sigh, you padded into the living room and opened it. You were shocked to see Vision of all people.
"(Y/N), I hate to disturb you this late, but I could use your assistance with a personal matter."
Vision looked uncharacteristically distressed, so you opened the door further and stepped aside to signal he should come in. He stepped inside with smile and a nod. You gestured with your hand that he should sit, and he took a seat on the couch. You sat in the armchair next to him.
"What's up, Vis?"
"It's Wanda. I said something earlier that upset her. She told me which words upset her, but I don't understand why they did. I was hoping that you, as her friend, could explain exactly what happened."
"I'll do my best, what did you say?"
Vision went on to repeat something that on the surface sounded innocuous enough, but its meaning could either be completely innocent or extremely derogatory. You had to explain to him what exactly Wanda heard in his words and why that would make her feel belittled and insecure. When he realized how he sounded, Vision immediately became remorseful.
"Thank you, (Y/N). I appreciate your help, and your friendship. I will let myself out."
He stood from the couch and walked back out your front door. You sighed and pulled yourself back off the chair and trudged to the bedroom where you finally collapsed into the warm embrace of your bed.
Tumblr media
Your alarm came far too early the next morning. After hauling your ass out of bed, you brushed your teeth and washed your face before slipping into a t-shirt and joggers. In your kitchen you poured a large glass of your favorite cold-brew coffee and fixed it to taste. You grabbed a banana and a granola bar and headed down to your new home for the next twenty-four hours.
Take-off occurred without a hitch, and comms were up and running smoothly. You had to stay alert in case of emergency, but as long as you could still hear and monitor things, you were able to entertain yourself however necessary. So you worked on reports.
The flight from NYC to the old Hydra base in Argentina was just over six hours via Quinjet, so you had plenty of time to finish your reports, and even had time to look over some of the DOJ proposals. But when they touched down outside a remote village at the base of the Andes, it was time to give your full attention to the mission.
You spent the next ten hours giving the team whatever they needed: blueprints, topographical maps, satellite imagery, etc. There were times when it was fairly quiet, but it was never long before someone needed something.
Thankfully the mission went off without a hitch. The team was headed home, and you were almost done. Just another six hours, the debriefing, and then you could get back upstairs and into your bed. Well, after you wrapped your sister's gift and signed the card.
It was seven in the morning when you finally saw another person. A whole 24+ hours alone was actually kind of nice, despite your exhaustion. The debriefing was fairly quick, the whole team was ready to crash so you went over all the necessary stuff and agreed to do the rest later.
You crawled back into bed right at 8:00 am, and hoped four hours of sleep would feel better than it sounded.
Tumblr media
Four hours of sleep did not feel better than it sounded. You scrambled around the apartment, running between trying to get ready in the bathroom and getting your sister's gift and card ready. You crawled in an Uber ten minutes past the time you were supposed to leave, and asked the driver to step on it. Unfortunately, you had the world's slowest driver.
You fumbled out the back of the car with the large gift in your hands and rushed inside, knowing your mom wouldn't be happy with your tardiness.
"I know, I know, I'm late. I'm sorry," you sat the gift on a table overflowing with them.
"It's fine dear," your mother said in a breathy voice that made it clear that she was not pleased with you. "Although if you keep prioritizing career over family, you may never have one of your own some day."
You rolled your eyes. It was going to be a long afternoon.
The whole party you saw your sister one time. You stopped by her table at the head of the room to say hello, and she introduced you to her friends, "Oh, yeah, this is (Y/N) my (y/g/p/s). (Y/P/N) works for Stark Industries."
You smiled and made some small talk, and then went back to the table you'd been sat at. After that, you tried to sneak out several times, but your mom always intercepted you. She would introduce you to someone new or ask for your help with some menial task.
Five o'clock rolled around and you, of course, got stuck helping to clean up. First you helped her get all the gifts into the rental SUV she'd pulled around back. Then you helped her collect all the decorations, as she was convinced she could reuse them. Finally you aided her in taking out the trash, because she didn't want to pay the venue staff to do it.
It wasn't until 6:30 that you finally left, and it was another hour before you made it back to the tower after traffic.
"(Y/N)? What are you doing up?" Peter asked you as you joined him in the elevator. He was sweaty and wearing training clothes. It was easy to deduce he was on his way up from one of the basement training floors.
"I had my sister's baby shower to go to, and now I'm headed up to change for Nat's thing tonight."
"But didn't you just run coms for that 24 hour mission?"
"Yep," you popped the 'p' as you leaned your head back against the cool metal wall of the elevator.
"You should really take a break."
"You don't think I don't know that?" you laughed sarcastically.
It may have been a bit harsh, but you really didn't need a lecture at the moment. Peter looked at you like he wanted to say something, but he didn't, and you spent the rest of the ride in silence.
Once back in your apartment, you turned on the coffee maker, and ran back to the bedroom to get changed. You pulled on what was your only really nice 'going out outfit'. It was definitely on the sexier side, but you didn't have the time or energy to get self conscious about it.
Back in the kitchen you poured a large cup of coffee and drank it black. Not your preference, but you didn't have time to fix it nicely, and the more concentrated, the faster the caffeine would hit your bloodstream. After rinsing your mug, you headed back downstairs to meet with the others.
The others were thirty minutes late, you pulled out your phone to text Wanda when the lobby door opened. Wanda and Vision walked in, his arm around her. They were eating ice cream.
"Hey, (Y/N). You look good, where are you headed?" Wanda asked, as Vision broke away to push the elevator button.
"Nat's thing. That's still going on isn't it?"
Her eyes widened, "Oh, no one told you? Nat was pretty exhausted after that mission, so we're pushing it to next weekend."
"Oh," you said simply. It felt like you were floating, detached from reality. "That's fine."
"Are you sure?" she asked, looking concerned.
"Yeah, yeah. You know, I think I'm going to go out anyways. I need it."
Without another word, you started for the front door.
Tumblr media
You weren't sure how long it had been and how many drinks you'd had, but you felt great. The music in the club was loud and it kept you from thinking. As you danced through the crowd, you found a stranger. He was tall, dark, and handsome, and best of all he was right there, willing to give you what you needed right then and there.
As you rubbed your ass back against his clothed crotch, your arm was grabbed, and you were pulled away from him. Looking at your abductor, you were shocked to see a concerned looking Peter.
"(Y/N), where the hell have you been?" he yelled over the thump of the bass once he'd gotten you over to the wall.
"I've been having fun," you slurred, rolling your eyes at him.
"You shut off your phone and no one's heard from you in hours! Mr. Stark had to remotely activate your phone and ping your location."
"You tracked my phone?" you asked, getting angry. Who the hell gave them the right, you wondered. "I'm just out here, by myself, getting fucking wasted!"
"Why, (Y/N)? This isn't you."
"Maybe it should be me," you countered, "Maybe if I cut loose every once in a while and did something for myself I wouldn't be so fucking miserable all the time."
"What are you talking about?"
"My life sucks, Pete. It really sucks ass. I never have any time for myself. I never sleep, I hardly ever get to eat a hot meal, and I'm constantly exhausted. I do everything for everyone, and I'm sick of it."
At some point during your rant, you'd started crying. Hot tears rolled down your face and you leaned heavily against the wall. Peter's face softened, and he reached out to touch you. As soon as his skin met yours, you pulled him into a tight embrace, and his arms locked around you. His fingers smoothed your hair as you sobbed into his chest.
"Come on, let's get you home."
He pulled you through the crowded club, half carrying you. You finally made it outside, where Peter held you close as he asked the valet to retrieve the car. They brought around the dark sedan and Peter helped you into the front passenger seat, even going as far to buckle your seatbelt for you.
Peter jogged around the front of the car and took his place in the passenger seat. You turned to face the window, embarrassed to let him see you this way, drunk and overemotional. His free hand reached over to rub your shoulder softly.
"I'm sorry," you breathed through sobs.
"For what?" he asked, genuinely confused. You turned to look at him.
"For going off on you like that, and running off and getting drunk, and making everyone worry."
"No, (Y/N). We're the ones who should be sorry. You've been working way too hard lately."
You didn't have the strength to argue, so you just let your head rest on the cool glass of the window.
Tumblr media
When you woke up the next morning, you couldn't remember how you'd gotten to bed, or when, but you were grateful you had. Your head was pounding and the light coming from the window wasn't helping. You rolled over with a groan so see a glass of water and some ibuprofen set out for you on the nightstand.
After downing the water and medicine, you checked your phone and had nearly had a heart attack. It was 2 pm already, and you'd missed several meetings, and a scheduled phone call. You jumped out of bed and began fumbling around for your clothes.
"(Y/N), your vitals indicate you may be in distress. May I call someone for you?" Friday's voice came from above you.
"No, Friday," you grumbled, "Actually, wait. Call Mr. Stark and let him know I'm on my way down. Tell him I overslept and missed our earlier meeting, but I'll be there ASAP."
"Mr. Stark has indicated you are on paid leave for the week. Would you still like me to send the message?"
Paid leave? You hadn't requested any time off.
"Also, Mr. Parker asked to be notified when you woke up. Should I notify him?"
"Sure," you agreed absentmindedly as you sat back down on the bed. As hard as you tried, you couldn't remember what happened after Peter picked you up at the club last night.
You stood up from the bed and made your way in to the bathroom. A hot shower helped relax your tense muscles and alleviate the headache. Afterwards, you felt much better. You dressed in shorts and a t-shirt, deciding to stay comfortable.
In your living room sat Peter, scrolling on his phone on your couch.
"Hey," he said, setting his phone down and turning to look at you over his shoulder. "How'd you sleep?"
"Pretty good I guess. Do you know why Stark has me on paid leave?"
"Yeah, I talked to him last night after I got you into bed. He agreed that your workload's been way too high lately, and he's giving you the week off to rest. He's also going to let you hire an assistant, if you want."
"You did that for me?"
"Of course, (Y/N). I hate to see you so stressed out. You deserve better."
"Thank you, Peter."
"Don't thank me yet. I ordered a pizza, your favorite ice cream is in the freezer, and I'm still supposed to take it easy from the other day, so I was thinking a Star Wars marathon might be in order. If you're up for it."
You smiled so wide your cheeks hurt, "Definitely. Have I ever told you that you're the best?"
You leaned over and pulled him into a hug, and he reciprocated. As long as Peter's by your side, you could do anything. Including say no.
thatredheadwriter’s Masterlist
146 notes · View notes
hpdabbles · 3 years
Text
Number 1 Fan
Since I am tired, I’m just going to post the bullet points for this dream I had a few days ago and it was mostly due to @childotkw because I spent waaay to long on their blog (which is amazing) right before bed. I added a few more when I woke up but here it is.
Harry time travels to the year 1943 due to a accident involving Ron and Hermione arguing about how time travel can change the time line if someone were to go further back then when they were born and thus not run into their past self claims the redhead. Ron was right and now Harry is stuck in the past. He is seventeen to Tom Riddle’s fifteen. 
Now with the war going on no one really cares about Harry or where he came from- most assuming he is a refugee- and he doesn’t grab a lot of attention. He has funds due to sealing the Potter and Black vaults into a tattoo he has on his left pec but he’s bored. 
Harry decides to sign up for duelist competitions as he has always been good at that. The British Ministry of Magic isn’t really part of the war against Gellert Grindelwald so he thinks he can relax a little and let Dumbledore handle it. For once not be the Hero. 
Harry rapidly becomes a dueling champion but he doesn’t get famous until he is drafted for the National Duelist Team. His fame skyrockets as he soon becomes the youngest on the British team and the undefeated. Much like Lockhart he is turn into a teen idol, with screaming love-stuck fans at each of his matches and indorsed merchandise. 
One of his first matches before he was on the NDT, Tom riddle accompanied Orion Black and Abraxas Malfoy to watch the aspiring rookie making waves in the amateur duels. He went only to make good connections with the Pureblood Heirs but is left awestruck by Harry’s performance. He couldn’t look away from the handsome teenager throwing men twice his age and weight like rag dolls. Tom thinks Harry looks Feral and Collected all at the same time. He gets a big fat crush.
Tom after that becomes Harry’s number one fan. He never misses the result of Harry’s matches in the newspaper or Radio, always fights his way to the front of the store selling Harry’s new merch and even starts a club. Ordinally the club was meant to study Dueling techniques and spells, but it morphed into Tom gushing about the hot new duelist for hours instead. The club surprisingly gets a lot more members when words gets out it’s a fanclub for Harry the Undefeated. 
Dumbledore of course notices Tom’s new extracurriculars. He is suspicious at first but once he realizes that Harry is distracting Tom from Grindelwald-like tendencies he is super supportive of the club. He even organizes for Harry to come give a speech at Hogwarts to “inspire” young people to work hard. (Read: Force the magic of Love onto Evil Child) 
So distracted is Tom he actually stops trying to find his father and the Chamber of secrets because Harry the Undefeated, love of his life, man of his dreams might actually come to Hogwarts! He may get to meet him! In! Person!
Harry of course accepts and is horrified to see a Tom Riddle screaming his head off, covered head to toe in his merchandise and wearing Club Founder/President stash for his fanclub when he arrives. What kind of trick is this?
Harry thinks Tom Riddle is Up To Something when in reality Tom is just writing poems about Harry’s green eyes and fanfiction of them falling in love in his diary. 
Harry is offed the teaching position for the Defense Against the Dark Arts after his speech from Dumbledore but Headmaster Dippet doesn’t allow it due to Harry not having any Owls or Newts. He is fine with that but breaks so many hearts when he leaves Hogwarts. 
Tom cried for three days and Orio almost threw himself out a window after having to hear Riddle’s woes. “He’s so handsome Orion...Did you see his eyes!? They look like the killing curse!...He’ll never love me!”  “Grim I beg thee, end my suffering”
Unknown to Tom, Harry was worried about Tom Sr. and had spent a few months on trying to find the man. When he did, he carefully creates a muggle business to partner with Tom Sr. and offer him help for what he went though.
He unknowingly inform the man of a son he didn’t know by implying he knew a teenager who looked like him. Tom Sr. takes it upon himself to verify this claim and finds Wools Orphanage. He meets Tom for the first time that summer. 
Tom Sr. is ~Gay~ which is why the love potion hurt him so much. He is expecting to hate his son for reminding him of the witch but is actually met with a boy who is ~Bi~  who reminds him of himself with a love for a man he can not have and thinks “Well I won’t have any heirs anyway. Mom and Dad are desperate for the line to continue.”
 He takes Tom away from Wools and is quite please with his new heir for Tom has the perfect mannerism, pose and accomplishments- when he’s not squealing about some duelist. The grandparents are just happy to have someone who will live on with the name they don’t care he’s gay and magic. They would take anything at this point.
Tom Sr. grows to accept the magic world only because they allow gay marriage and any world that does that can’t be all bad. Besides his son is a riot.  Evil maybe but a riot.
Harry is not happy to find Tom with his dad the next time he goes for tea especially when the boy looking at him like he hung the sun and the moon but also like he isn’t breathing. 
“F-father I can’t believe it... you know Harry!? Omg I meeting Harry the Undefeated.”  *Wheezing Hormonal gasps of a teen who never learn to Emotions correctly* ”I can’t believe it. Harry the Undefeated here...in the flesh....you’re so pretty”  “Come near me and I’ll cut off your arm”  “You have a pretty voice.” 
Just Tom Riddle being Harry’s number one fan messing up the time line and Harry wanting a break for once in his life from this madness. 
74 notes · View notes
whatiwillsay · 3 years
Text
t 2017 playlist analysis
Alright folks, whether you’re newly indoctrinated in the swiftgron faith, or have been here for a while, buckle up because boy is there crack coming your way.  It should be important to note that these are of course reaches and should be taken with a grain/pound of salt.  What you’re about to read is a lyrical analysis of a playlist made by Dianna on her private spotify, titled ‘t 2017.’  Therefore, the only real ‘evidence’ we have to make connections lies in the lyrics, and the general vibe of the playlist.
The following lyrical analyses stems from the idea that Taylor and Dianna may, and I strongly say may have hooked up, possibly around late 2016, or early 2017 (right when this playlist was made).  If you haven’t already, I highly suggest reading Cam’s Swiftgron timeline that she has meticulously and laboriously outlined for all of us, so you have more background knowledge on any reaches/connections made.  Also listen to her pod for extra serotonin cause I know you bitches want it.  Anyway, I digress– I’ll be pointing out only the songs/lyrics that I think are most relevant (and to make this post shorter, I apologize in advance) but I urge y’all to take a look at each songs’ lyrics to see for yourself, because some of these songs seem loud af.  Ok happy reading!
Genesis- Grimes
My heart, I never feel I never see I never know Oh, heart And then it falls And then I fall And then I know
This verse talks about the unpredictable nature of love, you never know when those feelings could come rushing in, and there could be days when you feel like you’re never going to love again– gives me cowboy like me vibes with that particular sentiment.
Home and I know Playing the deck above It’s always different I am the one in love
Ok I don’t think this one needs any explanation other than tis the damn season.
1998- Chet Faker
We used to be friends We used to be inner circle I don’t understand What have I become to you
This verse is giving me major the 1 vibes– “rosé flowing with your chosen family” kinda thing.  Relationships (yes, even hookups) are hard, especially when you go from knowing someone like the back of your hand, to a being a mere memory.  It’s even harder when you run in the same social circles and are bound to bump into each other.  What are you to do with all those unresolved emotions/lack of closure?  I just find this a bit funny because two years later at SNL, Dianna is actually considered Taylor’s ‘inner circle’ at the afterparty.  
Drops- Jungle
When you’re so high, you When you fall from the sky, you So come down from the clouds Come down on me
I’ve been loving you too long
I’ve been loving you too long
This song sort of encapsulates the feeling of love that is intoxicating, one might even say addicting.  In that sense, I’m getting major Style vibes, in that they keep coming back to each other because of that high and intoxicated love.  More than anything, this verse reminds me of Clean, and of course Dianna’s infamous tweet, “withdrawals…clearly we had fun” (see Cam’s swiftgron masterpost/timeline for receipts).
Ritual Union- Little Dragon
Straight off the bat, this song gives off major infidelity vibes (something Taylor has been obsessed with as evidenced by Evermore, and of course Babe which btw had a lot of social media signalling/shenanginas happening in 2017/2018).  Perhaps Winston was the cuck after all and we did get a swiftgron hookup? 
Ritual union’s got me in trouble again I was wonderin’ of a white dress And the mistress And a spirit holding my hand!
You do the math with that one– ivy anyone?
Daniel- Bat For Lashes
Daniel when I first saw you I knew that you had a flame in your heart And under our blue skies Marble movie skies I found a home in your eyes We’ll never be apart
I only have two words to explain this verse– Begin Again
But in a goodbye bed With my arms around your neck Into our love the tears crept Just catch in the eye of the storm
With this verse in particular, there’s this sense of a heartbreaking parting of ways in a relationship.  It feels eerily similar to This Love– “your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave.”  There’s also a mention of a storm, and we all love a good old storm in the swiftgron universe (Clean, DBATC, CIWYW).
Can’t Do Without You- Caribou
I swear to god these are the only two lyrics
Can’t do without
I can’t do without you
Make of that what you will.
Touch- Shura
This was the song that had me fully convinced that swiftrgon might’ve hooked up again in the recent past.  It’s so fucking loud and I did audibly gasp when I read these lyrics.  I’m so tempted to post the entire song because honestly every lyric fits their narrative almost to a t, but I’ll try putting the loudest lyrics here.
There’s a love between us still But something’s changed and I don’t know why And all I wanna do is go home with you But I know I’m out of my mind
This love is good, this love is bad.  This slope is treacherous, I like it.  If the hookup did happen, it’s clear that it’s a bit hard to just pick up immediately from where you left off.  Of course there’s still a lot of love there, it just takes time for those years to melt away.
I wanna touch you but I’m too late I wanna touch you but there’s history I can’t believe that it’s been three years Now when I see you, it’s so bittersweet
Ok this is basically swiftgron’s story right here, I mean come on?!?
I’m running down a dream like Tom Petty, I’m a heartbreaker But then you changed up a relationship, I’m mostly bankrupt There’s a new kid on your block, I gotta hang tough
Cowboy like me anyone?
Yeah, the effect of touch hands is like a miracle How is it you’re halfway across the world when I’m still feeling you? Just a touch of my love, just a little bit Ain’t no love without trust, we gotta deal with this
Gives me treacherous and wonderland vibes– “I’ll do anything you say if you say it with your hands” and “you searched the world for something else to make you feel like what we had.”
iT- Christine and the Queens
I feel like this song gives off major Reputation vibes– controlling your narrative/ ridiculing what other people thought you were, etc. 
With it I become the death Dickinson feared With it I’m the red admiral on his ship And I raise with infants for my coronation I’ve ruled over my all my dead impersonations
‘Cause I’ve got it I’m a man now
Sunday Love- Bat For Lashes
This is a literal weekend hookup anthem (major tis the damn season vibes) and is also one of the other songs that convinced me of the swiftgron hookup.  Again, please look at all the lyrics and deduce for yourself and freak out like I did, but I’m putting the loudest lyrics down.
See her in blue eyes Numb and shining In the face of strangers In the city lights Where he’s climbing Cupid’s diving And I know that she’s come To spend the night
She is in my bedroom Now I can’t fight 
Blue eyed lady coming to your house to fuck you. Ok Dianna, real subtle with that. I’m joking but I snorted when I saw this lyric.
I see her in every place I go Sunday love is so cold Even though I’m falling apart I want Sunday love in my heart
You could call me babe for the weekend cause it’s the damn season.  Also “I see you everywhere the only thing we share is this small town.”
Sweet Talk- Jessie Ware
There’s never any doubts when i need you It’s just that you can always make me feel like I am slipping in way too deep And let the shadows hope to hide or break the dreaming, dreaming of us
The vibe of this song is that there’s someone who always pulls you in because they know exactly what to say.  They found wonderland and got lost in it. 
Dear To Me- Electric Guest
When it’s bad Feels like I don’t know which way I should go But over time I come back and remember The one thing that I know
You’re dear to me and I know 
I know I’ve tied so many songs to ttds, but I guess it’s all the more reason to claim that one for swiftgron nation?  This verse reminds me of  “the road not taken looks real good now, and it always leads to you and my hometown.”
Got It Bad- Leisure
This song was added much later to the playlist on Taylor’s birthday in 2019. All other songs were added early feb of 2017.  With this song, I don’t get much except cowboy like me vibes.
Got our different ways with the same old payout Had our own dreams with the same old outcome Had a bad extreme and the same old break down Worked it to the bone with the same old habit
Et voila, that’s the end! I know this was super long so thanks for sticking through.  Again please note that these reaches were made because we are a little biased through a swiftgron lens.  It’s very possible that Dianna simply likes these songs and put it on a playlist, but let’s be real, gays practically communicate through spotify.  This is not fact and not proof for anyone to hound Dianna or invade in her or Taylor’s personal life, this is just for swiftgron fun.  That said, I’m personally inclined to believe that something did happen between Taylor and Dianna in 2017 possibly.  That’s all I have to say, thanks!
submission⬆️⬆️⬆️
ANON THIS WAS AMAZING YOU JUST MADE MY MORNING!!!
you should make a gaylor blog if you don’t have one already we NEED more of this content!
41 notes · View notes
ashintheairlikesnow · 3 years
Note
*DASHES INTO THE ROOM, STRANGELY PHYSICAL HEARTS SPILLING OUT OF MY ARMS*
I HEARD ASH NEEDED LOVE TODAY AND I’M HERE TO TELL YOU 25 REASONS YOU ARE INCREDIBLE BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT. SO HERE WE GO, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, 25 SUPER COOL AWESOME ASH THINGS THAT MAKE MY DAY BRIGHTER
1) your blog name is just!!! Really cool!!! To this day, I don’t know why, it’s just a daily source of giddiness. Love me a blog with a really cool play on word name and hey howdy hey look what we got here, a super cool blog with a super cool name
2) you are so amazingly kind??? And incredibly involved with your readers??? You are the sort of writer I thought existed when I was a smol sheltered bean and lo and behold one of my first outings I find a super awesome cool and interactive writer who cares??? So much about what she’s putting out into the world, and how it affects others??? You are both an inspiration and a gift??
3) thanksgiving lives in my head rent free, day after day, minute after minute. Catch me sweeping up popcorn at work and all of a sudden my brain is starting my cinematic presentation of stuff being spooned onto a pitifully empty plate, and the warmth of the holidays being stolen away by the things that lurk in grey eyes :)
4) you and your blog have (has? Grammar. Bleh) been such a source of wisdom, and it’s just wonderful. I know I can’t be the only one. You share so many wonderful resources, and you *care* so much I just. Yeah. You’re incredible. I cannot even begin to explain how much I’ve benefited from running across this wonderful place.
5) I cannot speak about the amazing things that comprise ash without going absolutely bonkers about your w r i t i n g. I just. You are so good at layering meaning upon meaning upon meaning into your works, until they become this beautiful, colorful sedimentary formation of gorgeous intent and heartbreaking subtext.
6) and beyond just subtext, IMAGERY, ASH. IMAGERY. I COULD WANDER DOWN YOUR SPRAWLING CORRIDORS OF DESCRIPTION FOR HOURS. GET LOST IN ALL THE LITTLE NOOKS AND CRANNIES WHERE DETAILS LIE AND MY HEART GOES TO BE FULL AS WELL AS TO SHATTER
7) just about any time I’m up early I see a happy little green discord bubble that makes my heart go ☀️❤️ and I’m not a morning person, but it always puts me in a happy mood to start my day
8) hello random point here!! Just for me to say you’re amazing and I love you!! I’m allowed to do that cause I made the rules :P
9) you are taking a break!!! A well deserved, wonderful break to rest the ash head!!!!! Take care of the ash brain!!! For inside it are many wonderful things!!! Many amazing gifts to this world that you bless us with!!! Take care of the ash!!!
10) now I will sing a song: *clears throat* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH HOW I LOVE THE ASH OC’S, THE ASH OC’S, THE ASH OC’S! HOW I LOVE THE ASH OC’S THAT BREAK MY HEART IN TWO
11) you were the first whump writer I ever really came into contact with! That’s not to say I hadn’t read whump before, but I had never interacted with anyone before. And nervous little me stuck my head in and you went HELLO WELCOME WE’RE ALL VERY FRIENDLY HERE HAVE A SLICE OF HEARTACHE PIE AND JOIN THE FUN and I cannot thank you enough for that
12) your profile picture. Please. It gives me so much serotonin
13) stop I’m already gay. This comes with no context but it doesn’t even need it. You know who this is about.
14) Chris owns my entire heart and also my soul 🥺 so does Kauri, come to think of it 🥺 and Jake 🥺 and Krista 🥺 and-
15) I FINISHED THE BAD ARC RECENTLY AND HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME. HOW DARE YOU DO SUCH A FANTASTIC JOB RIPPING MY HEART TO PIECES IN SUCH A BRILLIANT MANNER. HOW DARE YOU MAKE SOMETHING SO gOOD HURT SO BAD. HOW DARE-
16) Teach me to write pls you are a goddess of prose and I bow at your altar
17) HEY GUESS WHAT IT’S ANOTHER RANDOM BLURB WHERE I JUMP IN AND REMIND YOU THAT I LOVE YOU IN CASE YOU FORGOT WHAT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT! YOU ARE FANTASTIC! YOU ARE SPLENDED! KIND! IMPORTANT! TRULY MAGNIFICENT!
18) never has someone ever managed to make me so worked up over a roomba, I swear to god I am more invested in Kiera’s well-being than I am in my own, PLEASE TELL ME MY FUNKY LITTLE VACUUM MAKES IT
19) Vincent! Shield! Breaks! My! Heart! Someone! Please! Help! Him! For! The! Love! Of! God! Please! Just that whole...kauri’s whole....and Owen and....😭 you have such good concepts and they break me to pieces and the (minimal though it is) comfort stitches it back together and ASHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
20) five more left! Five more left! Cause I can only fit 25 in! But there is! so much more! About the Ash! Of that I’m sure! Look out. Here comes the Ash love!
21) this is specifically a me thing, but in following some of the discourse that passes through your blog, I have learned a *lot* about the world, and about myself. I won’t give specifics, but you actually encouraged me to talk with someone, and secure a diagnosis that I’ve been holding off on for a long time. And it has opened up so many pathways, and helped me see the world in such a different light and I just. I can never really thank you enough for that?
22) I can never get enough of how amazing you are at flipping the usual narrative on its head, and drawing out such crucially important morals from it? God I just. Ash
23) you’re still here! You’re still going! The world is a crazy place, and the internet even crazier, but look at you! You’re here! In spite of it all, it’s still you! And I thank my lucky stars every day for it!
24) this is just a fun fact but you are one of (5) blogs I keep post notifications on for, constantly. Tumblr and I are very fickle friends, but I cannot tell you how much it gives me a little rush of glee (or terror or sorrow or fear depending on the content) whenever I get that little banner pop up on my phone and it says ASHINTHEAIRLIKESNOW POSTED:
25) Number twenty five is simply, truthfully, and completely that you are Ash! You are wonderful, and brilliant, and a light in a world that gets pretty dim, every now and then. Even when your light feels a little grey, never let it go out ❤️ you are loved, and you are so very special, and you deserve tenfold of the goodness you put out.
ANYWAY, IN CONCLUSION: WE LOVE YOU TO THE MOON AND BACK ASH!!!!!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Anon, I have no response that can possibly match what I was sent here. This was delightful and it made me feel the same way I felt when I first saw the ‘boom da yada’ commercial for the Discovery channel, which is to say... awesome. Thank youuuuuu for this list!
18 notes · View notes
spnshameblog · 3 years
Text
i get worked up over a lot of stupid shit and i run a fucking spn blog in 2021, but i am genuinely glad i’m not one of the weirdoes who gets super upset about who tops/bottoms in a fictional relationship.
like. god, some of yall treat top/bottom like genuine personality traits with your “this character bottoming is ooc” bullshit. also? top/bottom and dom/sub are two VERY different dynamics and not every relationship has to have a dom and a sub? most dont?
its ok and fine to have a preference, but like.... once you start moralising about someones top/bottom headcanons you gotta take a step back and remind yourself that its not that deep. i have. honest to god had to look at people call other people homophobic and misogynistic (??) bc they disagreed with their interpretation of a fictional sexual dynamic. the specific incidence im thinking about rn wasnt even in the spn fandom, but imagine someone going “people writing dean as a top are regressive, dean NEEDS to bottom or else youre playing into homophobic stereotypes” and it NOT being a weapons grade shitpost. hssssss just say you think its hotter the other way round, you dont need to act like its about gay rights olkjwiekjhcwejnj
the worst kind of ppl are fans who leave negative/mean comments on fanfic bc they “disagree” with the sexual dynamic the author chose for the fic. if you dont like it just close the tab or skip over the scene like everyone else wtf is wrong with you??? 
anyways, i think there should be more switching in fics bc equality or whatever.
4 notes · View notes
im-not-a-joke · 4 years
Text
Here’s a super niche au that only me and @eraseyourbookofstories will appreciate but I couldn’t help myself
The Party but on tumblr things
(This might be confusing, just go with it)
ok so before we get into this here’s my explanation - stranger things exists but the people we’re talking about here aren’t the characters, they just happen to have the same names (and also look and act identical but just go with it)  (queenie feel free to correct me if i’m wrong)
- first lets talk blogs
starting with el (main - waffleiron side - eggosenby11) - she is the biggest show!byler shipper ever and posts really specific (and correct) theories and when they get confirmed shes just like “CALLED IT”
max (madmaxs) is a huuuge show!elmax shipper and also bullies show!mike (and later tumblr!mike) on main 24/7
lucas’ blog (main - only-correct-opinions side - wtfisademogorgon) is mainly analyses of shows and movies that he likes with the occasional meme thrown in there, he personality really shines through in his tags and when he answers asks (but we’ll come back to the ask thing)
will’s (zomboy) celeb crush is finn wolfhard and he runs an it stan account, he’s very gay on main all the time and constantly reblogs those “date a boy who x” things, he is mutuals with el for a long time before this takes place, and they are good friends
dustin’s blog (dustinthewind) starts out as strictly dnd stuff, but his interests take over on now it’s a mess of fandom content and random facts and aesthetic dice
mike (finnwolfhardstolemyface) writes gay fanfic, i don’t make the rules. he makes a lot of memes and his blog is a bright yellow that hurts to look at, it’s titled “your daily dose of shitpost” (he also tends to complain about how they ruined show!mike’s character in s3)
jonathan (just-a-dude-and-his-camera) runs an aesthetic photography account, and occasionally steve shows up in his pictures, his pinned post reads “please stop complimenting the guy in my pictures, i already have to deal with him everyday, and if his head gets any bigger, it’s going to explode”
steve is too cool for tumblr but he likes to post jonathan’s stuff on his insta (he will, however, send jonathan a bunch of anons being cute, he signs them all “- your bf <3″
nancy (purple-roses) posts a lot of feminism and activism stuff and will roast the shit out of bigots that decide to mess with her (it makes robin like her even more)
robin (chasing-dreamcatchers) just kinda vibes, she reblogs whatever she wants, and posts usually about being a lesbian or dumb things steve does or her original poetry
- el is enby and uses she/her and they/them pronouns, they follow a ton of enby positivity blogs and reblog a bunch of positivity posts
- Dustin the trans guy reblogs trans ask games constantly
- el is decently well known in the little gay corner of the st fandom, so the rest of the party follows her
- she is mutuals with only mike and will at first, but she doesn’t really interact with mike
- will introduces her to the concept of show!elmax and she’s all “!!!! gay!!!”
- she proceeds to follow the elmax queen, max
- max is all “wait wait hold up waffleiron followed me w h a t”
- lucas and dustin are mutuals and don’t interact a lot but they do occasionally send each other asks
- max is also mutuals with lucas and dustin and she is a chaotic force in their inboxes
- will follows mike because curiosity and stays because he likes mike’s writing and his personality
- el recommends max’ blog to will and they become mutuals after max sees that el interacts with will’s posts a lot (“if they like him, i probably will too”)
- eventually they all become mutuals and interact in each other’s inboxes a lot and spam asks and have a decent foundation to their friendship
- dustin makes a passing comment about a discord server and theyre all like “!!! yes!!!”
- dustin and lucas start sending each other crush anons
- they also know each other irl so theyre both conflicted
- so dustin makes a discord server for the six of them and it’s chaos
- max starts bullying mike on her blog
- mike starts posting about a mystery boy (its will) on his blog and being a big gay disaster on main
- will is all “why doesn’t he like me :(”
- el comes out by reblogging a gifset of sadie sink and tagging it like “marry me pls”
- everyone is like “what” and theyre like “oh i like girls”
- max panics
- will occasionally will make a post like “friendly reminder that finn wolfhard is very pretty” 
- mike and max are both like “hmmmmmm my crush has a celeb crush on a celeb that looks very similar to me,,,, must be a coincidence”
- they discover that they all live along the east coast so they plan to meet in virginia where lucas and dustin live
- steve, robin, and jonathan all chaperone will
- nancy chaperones mike and is all “excited to see your bf” the whole time
- “hEs NoT mY bOyFrIeNd”
- when they meet, nancy and robin are both like “holy shit she’s prettier in person”
- all the adults exchange phone numbers and have a groupchat because steve doesnt have tumblr or discord
- steve tells embarrassing stories about will and will is all “stop” and mike is in love
- dustin and lucas are like “it’s you!!” and dustin is like “i think i’m the only trans guy named dustin in virginia, it wasn’t exactly a challenge”
- theyre not conflicted now that they know their tumblr crush and irl crush are the same person
- will and el make eye contact for the first time and launch themselves into a bone-crushing hug
- max and el have a moment in the pool in the middle of the night where they end up talking about crushes and describing each other and el is like “i like you” and max is relieved and they become a thing
- they’re all crying at the end of the week when they have to go back and will and mike are messaging the discord constantly because they don’t have to drive, lucas and dustin are there too
- mike and nancy are both gay panicking on the way home and its weirdly silent for most of the ride
52 notes · View notes
uzunehitori · 3 years
Note
Every single one
Good morning, Robin! (Good morning at 3 in the morning)
Here we go! Thanks for sending a birdie some questions
Favorite characters?
Answered! I will always love Ryouta and Kazuaki, and Nageki!
Least favorite characters?
I don't have one really, but just only Sakuya's racism is so intolerable, but I still like him as a character overall!
Favorite route?
My favorite route would always be Shuu's because there is a lot of interpretations you can do with his and also like Ryouta's and Nageki's because they really hit hard! Though overall the best route is BBL since you get to learn more about the story!
Favorite human design?
Answered! Anghel's and Ryuuji's hands down are my favorite human designs!
What’s a part that sticks out to you the most?
"Quails are still learning to adapt to social life." and also, Yuuya caring about Sakuya all the time, it's really cute
What did you think of the new birdies in Holiday Star?
I loved Albert and seeing Tohri some more is great and funny, he's a great birdie. I loved Miru and Kaku they are super wholesome little white marshmallow gumdrops!
What was your first reaction to the Bad Boys Love route?
My first reaction when I played it in 2012 was I sobbed, I was in suspense, I was in surprised, and everything and it made me fall deeper than I was before with Hatoful, it's such a nice route that I wish there was so much more to it and would say that I loved the changed in textbox color that I wish we gotten it for Holistar!
How long did it take you to unlock the ‘hidden routes’ and ‘secret’ endings? What was your reaction to them?
Not to long, I was extremely curious about trying to get any option I can available especially the hidden routes and even the easy to miss conversations, I was so eager to get everything complete! I was extremely surprised with some and it was extremely enjoyable and didn't feel like a drag like I would feel for most other games like these.
Do you like to draw certain birdies a lot?
Answered! I used to draw a lot of Yuuya and Shuu, and Nageki art, I still do to this day! But now I draw a lot of Ryuuji and Quail boyfriends as well.
What are some of your favorite ships?
I really like a lot of ships, especially quail boyfriends and HitoriNageki and even Ryuuji Isa just the relationship in general I think is cute, I love plenty of other ships, like Sakuya and Ryouta! I do also like Nageki with Anghel!
Least favorite ships?
I don't really have one in all honesty.
Do you own any of the Hatoful merch?
I own a Ryuuji plush with his charm and an isa charm with a Shuu one! I also own fanmade Nageki and Yuuya button! Some other merch I have which is a sticker I did for myself of Nanaki too, it's super old.
Do you write fanfiction for the birdies?
I used to, but they don't exist anymore since I deleted my tumblr from 2012, unfortunately! I just draw more so and make little drabbles.
Do you have any AUs you like to write about?
I would love to draw a few, especially since me and my wife talk about a lot of AUs together of the things we like. I think about drawing some zombie apoc or some metal gear ones since we've talked about that before! I do like to make some winter AU ones that are nice too and cute.
Rank birdies from tallest to shortest.
Nanaki / Hitori > Yuuya > Asami > Leone > Okosan > Shuu = Tohri > Ryouta > Kazuaki > Sakuya > Nageki > Anghel > Miru/Kaku
What are some of your gender and sexuality headcanons?
I headcanon a lot of them to be just bisexual and the ones I think would be not caring or just nonbinary is Anghel and Shuu, and Hitori and Kazuaki and as well as Nageki, but still use he/him! Sakuya and Shuu to me are male leaning at best, while I think Kazuaki + Hitori and Shuu are gay / male leaning, while Shuu is aspec.
How did you get into Hatoful?
I got into Hatoful while dabbling around Yume nikki that I just bumped into a blog back in 2012 talking about it and learned that it recently got a release! I do miss the egg buttons with the save and load, that was cute... I wish we had it again for the remake!
Have you made any friends in the Hatoful fandom?
In 2012, I made a few friends! I made a friend with a really nice person that was a little older than me that we met on an online drawing board called iscribble, I was really young and we would roleplay the birdies. I don't remember what had us lose contact if it was over time or what? I do see them around however! I remember I've been meaning to contact them for a commission. I wasn't friends but I knew someone who used to run a hatoful ask blog named puddington, they were pretty nice! I hope to make new friends this year since I am pretty open to that!
What are some of your favorite headcanons?
I like the idea that Shuu has sensitivity towards the sun, temperature, and especially like I say it's a projection of sorts since he gets pretty moody and likes to be in the shade often. I also think he might have tritanopia. My other headcanon that I think despite things being mildly clearing up for Nanaki, I think he is still will be ridden in guilt with what he's done regardless. And I like to think that both Shuu and Nanaki gained a relationship after BBL, while having somedays being pretty bad for them.
Anghel shares his home country's food with every birdie as form of "healing properties". I think that Sakuya wears heeled boots because he's short. Hehe!
What’s your favorite piece of canon trivia?
Despite everything, Hitori likes bitter sweets! Shuu gets sick from having his glasses removed (Big mood.), Kazuaki-kun doesn't like veggies!
What birdie do you wish had more to them?
I really wish to learn more about Kazuaki-kun, I just more about him even if we know why he doesn't! I just love him and interested about him a lot... I also wish there was more to Anghel as well than just sometimes feel like he's the hehe eccentric character, I just want to know his life besides his chuunibyou.
What are some songs you associate with characters?
Shuu/Isa to me feel strongly of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SgWum9kHYk Duvet - Boa
Nanaki is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NE6pANWJGuU Imagination - Foster the People
Both Ryouta is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MeRIAew8eXc Freaking out the Neighborhood - Mac DeMarco
Yuuya is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8xtg-ntDZGk Come a Little closer - Cage the Elephant and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4qsjmLxhow The Adults are talking - The Strokes
Sakuya is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85Z3iwpFQeg Leave me alone - IDKHTFM reminds me of him, I think it's his sharp tongue
If Okosan had a true human form, what do you think he would look like?
There's this really buff japanese guy on tiktok that wears an apron that I just saw as the embodiment of Okosan, I will draw him in his liking because he just LOOKS like it would be what Okosan would be!
If you could change one thing in the story, what would it be?
Sakuya. I am kidding, I know most of the things he learned and was taught was from his very highly racist and classist dad, but I wish he would not be so? Aggressive towards Anghel... i also wish for the Comedy to drop a bit less, but not drop it entirely because almost a lot of the times it's really perfect!
What’s your version of Hiyoko like?
I like Hiyoko to be messy hair brunette that sometimes brushes it and sometimes doesn't and she can be messy with how she puts on, but really just like any teenage girl, I also picture her to be a little muscular since she is a hunter after all! I like seeing her as mixed as any race really, at most 2012 me just pictured my current partner without knowing lmao....
What’s your favorite irl bird?
Answered! I have many but I love the bearded vulture which I have an OC of!
Do you have any bird OCs?
Answered! I plan to make some though, I have one that wasn't originally planned for hatoful, but IT DID have hatoful in mind along with another thing!
What do you think would be a cool crossover for Hatoful?
Answered! I think also a Funamusea x Hatoful crossover would be really cute...
Do you have any human designs headcanons for the birds aside from canon (body type, etc)?
Answered!
What kinds of Hatoful merch would you like to see?
Answered! I do think it would be cute if there was also hatoful link charms, I plan making some in the future whenever I find a seller!
What’s your favorite Absolute Zero character?
Answered!
3 notes · View notes
Note
alex im thinking of listening to some of the podcasts that u like so i can relate to you again, what do u recommend
okay babe so i’m probably the worst person to ask for podcast recs because (despite being a podcast blog) i have listened to like three podcasts in my life and two of them are horror but here goes i guess (under the cut because it got long)
The Magnus Archives: this one’s obviously the first. Horror + tragedy but really its just a workplace comedy but not really. The Magnus Archives follows Jonathan Sims, The Head Archivist as he tries to get the archives in order while not knowing anything about archiving while trying to figure out what happened to the previous archivist while also trying to stop the apocalypse(s). Currently running (Season 5). Episodes every Thursday. Check the triggers for each episode before you listen. Very Gay. Critically Acclaimed. 10/10
The writing is insanely good. A Lot of lore to keep up with. current favourite podcast. I am emotionally attached to so many characters. Definitely listen to this if you can stomach horror and weird sfx (including but not limited to: worm noises, Man Attempts To Chop His Finger Off And Fails Repeatedly ASMR, and [extended sounds of brutal pipe murder] but NO kissing noises). Took me 16 days to complete but then again i didn’t have anything better to do.
Welcome To Night Vale: this one was my gateway podcast. episode one changed my life. kind of existential/cosmic horror but also a comedy. Told in the form of community radio broadcasts, it follows the daily happenings in the town of Night Vale, a high-key fucked up place, narrated by the omniscient radio host Cecil Palmer. Currently running. Bi-monthly (episodes every 1st and 15th). VERY Gay. 9/10
The writing is pretty deep. Fun to listen to at the end of a day to unwind. Not really horror horror, but wtnv has a special place in my heart.  I honestly could not tell you the timeline if held at knife-point. The weather is always great. Would unhesitatingly die for Khoshekh, Cecil and Carlos. Has several novels (+ a tv show in progress).
Limetown: okay so this was one of my first podcasts. Audio Drama with True Crime vibes (it’s entirely fictional btw). Limetown is a fictional story told as a series of investigative reports by Lia Haddock , a journalist for American Public Radio, detailing the disappearance of over 300 people at a neuroscience research facility in Tennessee. Completed. Two seasons. Apparently it was adapted into a tv show. Not Gay. The writing is good. 7/10
Fun to listen to but it can get a bit loud (as in both loud jump-scares and loud volume). Finished it in one day back in 2018. It was pretty interesting but I don’t recall much. learnt some pretty interesting things from it though :) The music in this was excellent, and i remember thinking the writing was good too.
The Penumbra Podcast: my most recent listen. i LOVED it. made a sideblog for it and everything. Audio Drama. It has two separate storylines: The Juno Steel series (noir detective +sci-fi), in which Juno, a brooding private eye on Mars tangles with an elusive homme fatale etc etc. The second storyline is The Second Citadel (fantasy), in which Sir Caroline must corral a team of emotionally distraught all-male knights to defend their citadel against monsters. It’s a lot more fun than I made it sound just now. Trust me. Currently running (Season 3). Episodes usually every other Tuesday. Super. Fucking. Gay. 10/10
I am emotionally attached to this podcast. It’s my comfort podcast. Joshua Ilon has a great voice, by the way. The writing is incredible. I would say something about how it talks about humanity etc but i can’t because i’ll cry. I kin Juno but that’s irrelevant. I am living for the found family + organised “crime” (is it really crime if it’s against capitalism?) trope in junoverse season 3.
The Black Tapes: one of my first podcasts! Paranormal Horror + Investigative Journalism. Alex Reagan, journalist at Pacific North-West Stories, investigates sceptic Richard Strand’s collection of Black Tapes- records of paranormal encounters he couldn’t disprove. Everything Is Connected TM. someone once said the magnus archives was the black tapes but better and yeah. Completed (? they re-released a bunch of episodes and i think they’re planning on releasing another season). Three Seasons. Not gay. 5/10
i listened to this in 2018 and i thought it was good at the time but it’s kind of. not bad. i guess? the writing was meh but its good background noise. Takes like 15% of your concentration to keep up with what’s going on. It’s fun in that Conspiracy Theories And Chill kind of way. The ending of season 3 was disappointing. Richard Strand kind of vaguely reminds me of mr darcy in that what-part-of-me-insulting-you-to-your-face-did-you-not-understand?-i’m-in-love-with-you way. but i’m playing it up too much. very underwhelming.
Lore: Non-Fiction. 30 minute episodes about dark historical tales, touching on both the macabre and the paranormal. lot of folktales and stuff but also a lot of real historical tales (but only the Fucked Up ones). You can listen to the episodes in any order. Bi-weekly. Currently Running. apparently it has a tv show and book series too. 7/10 but only because it’s excellent background noise + story inspiration.
great for listening while doing other work like math homework, which is what i do. it’s interesting enough and requires like 8% of your concentration to keep up. Aaron Mahnke has a relaxing voice. Would recommend if you spend a lot of time driving or something like that.
Alice Isn’t Dead: made by the same people as wtnv. Mystery + Supernatural Horror + Drama. A series of audio diaries by a truck driver searches across America for the wife she had long assumed was dead. In the course of her search, she will encounter not!human serial killers, towns lost in time and a conspiracy that goes way beyond one missing woman. Completed. Three seasons. has a novel that i did not read. 7.5/10 from what i remember
i never finished this one actually. it’s been on my list since forever but i kind of stopped after season one. all i remember was that it was good. planning on finishing this soon.
anyway that got long so if you’re still reading this <3 
14 notes · View notes
Note
All 65 ho! 😤
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
I mean I guess kind of sometimes? As someone with ADHD, object permanence is a big thing so if I don't see you, you aren't real xD
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
Um, it varies, actually. Generally speaking, I'm not afraid. But sometimes I have lots of nightmares and the darkness is awful and I will deadass sleep with the light on. Also while I'm not afraid, if I hear sounds, I am terrified xD
3. The person you would never want to meet?
Jason Mamoa. He seems like a fine person but something about his appearance triggers my fight or flight.
4. What is your favorite word?
Hippopomonstrosesquipedaliophobia
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
I think maybe either a birch or a weeping willow?
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
That's not yellow
7. What shirt are you wearing?
I'm wearing a green Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time shirt that my sister got for me a few years ago at Fan Expo.
8. What do you label yourself as?
Panromantic asexual. Gender identity wise, demigirl. I recently learned what omnisexual is and I'm curious, but I don't want to come out again so panromantic it is xD
9. Bright room or dark room?
Bright! Lots of sunlight for plants and reading!
10. What were you doing at midnight last night?
I was being trained at work
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?
I think 18, just because mentally I'm still there.
12. Who told you they loved you last?
My boyfriend :3 I miss him.
13. Your worst enemy?
Dickface. He called me his step daughter once and I almost fucking lost it in that Tim Hortons. I had to fight so hard not to say anything. I was also fighting some pretty rough food poisoning that week so I was not in the mood to argue xD
14. What is your current desktop picture?
On my computer? I think it's a rat xD it's either me with Cortana on my shoulder or Willow peeking through some bars, I can't remember.
15. Do you like someone?
I like my boyfriend. A lot. I mean I hope I do since we have been dating for 6 years xD but I also have a celebrity squish. Patrick Dempsey. Motherfucker. Yes. That smile. Those EYES.
16. The last song you listened to?
https://youtu.be/0Eh4b0Ge-sM
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
That power hungry cheeto. But only if I wouldn't get caught.
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
Dickface. He is a child abuser and just a shitty person all around. I called him a stupid idiot on my birthday and lost my fucking mind because I didn't actually mean to and he looked PISSED.
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?
I don't know who, but I would make them cuddle because I am touched starved and need a fucking hug xD
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)
I'm doing this all in my phones notes so I can't add a picture, but I love my tattoos and piercings! I have both nostrils pierced, my septum and snakebites. Tattoo wise, I have the Triforce of Courage on my left hand, a small blue hard on my right thumb, a beautiful memorial rat tattoo on my left leg, Midna's Fused Shadow on my left arm and Expecto Patronum on my right wrist. I. Need. More.
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?
Not gonna lie, I'd probably jerk off xD
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?
If I shared it, it wouldn't be a secret.
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?
I... don't know
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
I would stick with my normal Subway order: lettuce, tomato, red onions, LOTS OF PICKLES, cheese, black forest ham, mayo and salt and pepper.
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?
Not gonna lie, I would probably get some Subway and maybe some candle making supplies.
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?
California. I miss my boyfriend. Let's go.
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?
Joke's on you, I don't really drink alcohol! I would instead request all the apple juice :')
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
Pet rats for everyone!!!!
29. What is your favorite expletive?
I enjoy cunt :3
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?
My little stuffed lion. I would also grab my teddy bear seeing as they are always together.
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? (Tw rape for this question)
I mean... all of these experiences have made me who I am. But if i can erase one experience without changing who I am, it would be nice to not have been raped.
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!
I would say Indonesia because volcanoes! But I am also very gay and I don't believe that is a gay friendly country... so... maybe Japan? All of this assuming that the boyfriend is with me. If not, then California.
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
My grandpa. I really miss him... I want him to see how far I've come and I want to spend more time with him.
34. What was your last dream about?
I have been having a weird amount of sex dreams lately...
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?
Rat mom? I like to think so! Shameless plug, but I have a blog here called @ratpotatoez where you can see my beautiful chonks. I'm also on Facebook and YouTube.
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
I mean yes? But not for like an overnight stay.
37. Have you ever built a snowman?
Yes
38. What is the color of your socks?
Fuck socks
39. What type of music do you like?
Depends on my mood. I love heavier, alternative rock but my heart will forever belong to Simple Plan.
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
I think they're both really lovely!
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?
Vanilla
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)
I don't like football. The only sport I watch is hockey.
43. Do you have any scars?
I am covered in self harm scars (I'm working on covering them up with tattoos). I don't really have any scars with cool stories. I had one that went down my arm but somehow it healed??? Someone in gym class accidentally took a chunk out of my arm with their finger nail and I had a hole in my arm for the longest time!!! I also have a scar on my knee from when I was really young, maybe 3 or 4. I was balancing on some bricks in someone's garden and I lost my balance, fell, and hit my knee on the brick. I remember there being blood running all down my leg as I screamed and cried. So that was fun.
44. What do you want to be when you graduate?
I don't know. I do know, though, that I want to go to culinary school. I also want to go to school for creative writing.
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My weight. I gained 100+lbs when I went off my anti-depressants and I swelled up like a balloon. I've felt like shit about myself ever since.
46. Are you reliable?
I sure as shit hope so!
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
Was it worth it...?
48. Do you hold grudges?
I try not to, but I think I do ._.
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?
PIGEON RAT
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?
"I just really want to punch this horse in the face, okay?"
51. Are you a good liar?
I think so, yes. Trauma does that to you.
52. How long could you go without talking?
When I get super super drained, I go mute. I can stop talking for days at a time.
53. What has been you worst haircut/style?
I once left the hair dressers with essentially what was a fucking bowl cut. Yea, I wasn't thrilled. I refused to remove my hat.
54. Have you ever baked your own cake?
Yes. At 3AM. Because fuck a healthy sleep schedule.
55. Can you do any accents other than your own?
I can do an okay British accent and an okay Indian accent.
56. What do you like on your toast?
Butter. Just butter.
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?
Um... I don't remember the last time I drew. Actually, that's a lie. I tried drawing a "small town doctor" while playing Drawful. I drew a very tiny doctor with a city skyline behind him.
58. What would be you dream car?
Literally anything with the popup headlights.
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.
I talk to myself in the shower. Granted, I do that everywhere xD it's the only way I can work through my thoughts. I also cry in the shower a lot.
60. Do you believe in aliens?
Yes. We can't be the only ones here.
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?
I don't really have a favourite. But I do like D. Mostly because it's the first letter of my boyfriends name, but also it reminds me of a woman I helped while working in tech support. She needed help figuring out her gif keyboard so I helped and she was so excited when I told her how to search for gifs. She then started giggling like a little girl saying she wondered what might happen if she searched for DICK. She made my day xD I think about her a lot. I hope she's doing well.
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?
Don't do this to me...
Dragons are obviously amazing but haVE YOU EVER SEEN A DINOSAUR?!?!? LIKE THOSE THINGS ARE REAL. THEY WERE ALIVE. THEY FUCKING RULED THE EARTH. HAVE YOU SEEN A STEGOSAURUS?!?!?!?!?
64. What do you think about babies?
I like babies a lot. Like so much. I have super colourful hair, too, so they seem fascinated with me :') but their little chubby cheeks omg
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.
Fun fact: I actually really like the smell of wet dog. It's kind of a really comforting smell.
2 notes · View notes
tessatechaitea · 4 years
Text
Justice League Annual #1 (1987)
Tumblr media
Martian Manhunter has five thousand different super powers compared with the one super power of the rest of the team (Black Canary's sonic scream. The other "super powers" are just technological accessory based).
If this comic book isn't about Martian Manhunter's addiction to Oreo cookies then what am I even doing with my life? The only reason I love Martian Manhunter is that he loves Oreo cookies and I view him as the father I never had. Whenever I had a problem growing up, I would think, "What advice would Martian Manhunter give me?" And that's why I was so fat in Junior High School because the answer was always "Eat more Oreos." I know Martian Manhunter's eventual addiction is to "Choco's" but fuck Choco's. Fuck them like every other off-brand Oreo cookie. They fucking suck. Speaking of things that suck, this dick isn't going to suck itself. Now picture me pointing at the comic book because I need to read it. That's how I begin reading all of my comic books. And I say it loudly so the neighbors will think, "Oh boy! That guy next door isn't a nerd at all! Total sex maniac!" The "Hunting the Manhunter" blurb on this cover reminds me that Millennium is coming up and I think I hated that? No, no. I'm sure I loved it! There are two things I couldn't get enough of in my teen years and comic books was the second one of them. Kord Industries has bought some property in the middle of Ultra-Nowhere, South America, and some of its employees have gone off to scout the location.
Tumblr media
Wasn't that the episode with the shape-changing hottie who loves sucking the salt out of men? You know what I'm talking about. Also she was probably a male monster posing as a female monster. Proof of that theory is that every single episode of the first season of the original Star Trek could also have been the name of a gay bar.
Inside the abandoned research facility, the Kord employees encounter pretty much the same thing Kirk, Spock, and the other one encountered:
Tumblr media
Vampire John Travolta! It's possible I'm misremembering the Star Trek episode.
While on monitor duty, Guy Gardner discovers that large groups of people on four different continents seem to be under the control of a single will and Batman asks Martian Manhunter, "Do you think this is League business?" What the fuck else would be, Bat-Turd?! A new Internet fad like planking or the Harlem Shuffle? I mean, it totally could be that except that the Internet doesn't really exist during this story. I mean if you want to be a pedant about it, I suppose the teenage Internet across college campuses. But nobody likes a pedant so just shut the fuck up and live in my reality while you're reading my stupid comic book review. Just take the fucking Red Pill and relax! Except don't do that because the idea of The Matrix Red Pill has been co-opted by the worst of humanity who think they're somehow the most logical and philosophical people on the planet when they're really just awful monsters rationalizing all of their mean desires.
Tumblr media
How did people come away from reading this comic book hating Guy Gardner and not also despising Batman?
The Justice League splits up into teams of two to cover the mass hypnosis issues in Paris, Tokyo, Sydney, and Los Angeles. I'm not sure Batman knows how to balance teams because he sends Doctor Fate and Martian Manhunter together while leaving Mister Miracle with Blue Beetle. Here are my teams: Guy Gardner with Blue Beetle because Blue Beetle is effectively worthless and Guy Gardner has the most powerful weapon in the universe. Batman would go with Black Canary because her sonic scream is sort of like a bat's echo location. Martian Manhunter would go with Scott Free because they're both aliens. And Booster Gold would team up with Doctor Fate because their outfits match. Blue Beetle and Mister Miracle head to L.A. with some, um, problematic dialogue? I think?
Tumblr media
This is an "anal sex/everybody in Hollywood is gay" joke, right?
With newer comic books, a scan of 620 pixels (basically the width of the main column of the blog (although I think the width changed when I added the Goodreads app. I should probably fix it so the 620 pixel pictures stop bleeding off into the right-hand frame (if you're reading this on Tumblr, just ignore it. Just ignore everything since Tumblr fucked up their code and now I can't even center pictures or get the captions to sit snugly right up underneath the scans))) was usually enough to read the dialogue clearly. But with these old comics on newsprint, they're fuzzier and the font seems much smaller. Sorry about that but I won't betray my artistic integrity by scanning less than the full panel! At least not in this case is my defense against the pedants who can easily find many examples of me doing exactly that. First Black Canary is treated like shit by Batman and now she teams up with Booster Gold who can't stop hitting on her until she reminds him she's a competent limb-breaker. This must be the kind of comics Comicsgaters wish we could return to! "Remember when women were treated as sexual objects and not one member of the Justice League was Black and constantly said, 'Booyah!'? What great times!" Black Canary and Booster Gold become John Travolta Vampire slaves almost immediately because Batman chose the improper team pairings. It's bad enough that Batman would fail at making proper pairings but it's extra bad when Batman is being written by a writer and the writer made that choice. I mean, how do you pass up the opportunity to team Booster Gold with Doctor Fate?! They would look so fucking good together! Batman and Guy Gardner (you know how you can tell Hal Jordan is the real Green Lantern? Because people will say "Green Lantern" when discussing him instead of "Hal Jordan") wind up in Tokyo where Doctor Light is all, "Hello, boys! I'm a vampire now!" Then she blinds the fuck out of them because Batman forgot to put on his Bat-sunglasses.
Tumblr media
Batman steals this move from Doctor Light in the next regular issue.
Doctor Light kisses Batman and he's all, "Yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay. I get it. Being a vampire is pretty awesome. No wonder writers write vampire versions of me every other year or so."
Tumblr media
I don't think the editors briefed Willingham on what Beetle's Bug can and can't do.
Beetle lands at Kord West and is immediately swamped by John Travolta Vampire's thralls. So he does the thing he does in nearly every comic book except the one where Maxwell Lord shoots him in the head: he runs away. But he doesn't run fast enough and winds up possessed aboard the Bug with Mister Miracle. The story hints that Miracle gets possessed just after the scene changes but he's Scott Free, the world's greatest escape artist! I would guess he'd be the one to save everybody else but judging from the cover, it's Martian Manhunter who keeps from getting possessed. In Australia, Doctor Fate wades into a group of infected people because he's a gigantic arrogant prick. He's all, "I'm a frickin' Lord of Order, assholes! I know a spell that can get to the root of this problem!" And then the Vampire John Travolta is all, "I'll kill Kent Nelson if you don't leave his body." And Doctor Fate is all, "Well, J'onn, I've gotta go! Nice hanging out with you! Ta ta!" Which leaves Martian Manhunter as the only person left on Earth who isn't infected (or at least the only person left who is in this story). I bet that's pretty lonely. But Martian Manhunter is used to being lonely. I wonder if he's capable of making his right hand into a female martian so he can fuck it? Martian Manhunter has no idea what he's dealing with so he puts on Doctor Fate's helmet to gain all of the other powers that he didn't already have without it. But only for a few seconds because Superman would never be able to get an erection again if he found out Martian Manhunter had all of his powers and could also do magic. J'onn wears the helmet just long enough to learn what Doctor Fate learned about the contagion: it's a sentient cell! It's smart cancer! And I guess Vampire John Travolta was Patient Zero. Now J'onn just has to figure out how to fight Smart Cancer. I don't even know how he'll defeat it because I just looked up Smart Cancer in the Who's Who to read about its weaknesses and wouldn't you know it? There's no entry for Smart Cancer! Maybe it was in an update that I don't own. Like that version of Who's Who that was just loose pages to stick in a binder! I have that one too but it's possible I just didn't buy all of the expansion packs. Martian Manhunter heads to the source of the contagion to meet Smart Cancer head on. What he finds is a boss from Castlevania.
Tumblr media
When you have thousands of people at your disposal, is the most effective way to use them shoving them together into one giant person?
The first thing Smart Cancer's Granfaloon does is try to smash J'onn with its people fist. In effect, it's smashing a dozen people head first into the ground so that dirt sprays up all over the place. So I guess a dozen or so people are now dead, right? It's not like Smart Cancer gave them invulnerability to massive head wounds.
Tumblr media
I think this panel is the one where all the Justice League editors through their hands up in resignation and sighed, "I guess the Justice League is ridiculous now."
Martian Manhunter realizes, like me, how fucking stupid Smart Cancer is to put all of its people in one gigantic people-shaped basket. Since all the minds are linked, he realizes he can throw the Fate helmet on one of the people and Doctor Fate can possess Smart Cancer. It works but only for a limited amount of time. Doctor Fate can't hold that many people under his sway. But Doctor Fate does know who can control Smart Cancer: the martian! He can shapeshift his cells into some kind of prison or something. I don't know. It was explained in the most basic medical and scientific terms but they were still beyond my attention span. In the end, Martian Manhunter contained the Smart Cancer in him and that's where it lives now? Oh, and speaking of "the end," check out this clever and titillating final panel:
Tumblr media
"Why's it gotta be the ass of the only woman on the team?" I say while pulling my pants down.
Justice League Annual #1 Rating: What?! I don't rate annuals! I mean, maybe sometimes I rate annuals. This one was okay. It was sort of interesting but I was disappointed that Vampire John Travolta wasn't the actual enemy. I hope Smart Cancer fights its way out of J'onn and makes another appearance later.
2 notes · View notes
diabolikmosquito · 4 years
Text
Tag Game because I have no self-restraint
@the-mostdiabolik-of-lovers posted this one with permission for anyone to tag themselves so obviously I’m gonna take it and run. My asks are empty and I’ve been craving ask games and surveys lately, sue me. Putting it under a cut so I don’t clog anyone’s dash!
Gender: Female Star sign: Taurus Current time: 8:15 PM, though it’ll prolly be later by the time I finish typing this all out. Favorite song artists: Don’t make me choose. A lot of my favorite music is instrumental OST’s, though an instrumental artist or two that I love are ones like Jami Sieber, Brambles, Otto A Totland, and Joep Beving. For non-instrumental.. there’s a lot. Ellise, SYML, Nico Collins, Frank Sinatra, and Bohnes are a few I’ve had in some playlists lately, but there’s way too many.  Favorite songs: This is harder than the last one and I am not obligated to answer it. (’: But if you’re someone who reads my samples or threads, you might find some of my favorite OST’s/mood musics that suit the post/hint at something hidden in there. Song stuck in your head: Again, these change so often daily it’s hard to pick one, but a handful include A Little Messed Up by june, Dance Monkey (the slowburn edit), and way more OST’s than are healthy. (Highlights for that include the original Medievil soundtrack, which for some reason reminds me of Castlevania at times.) Last movie you saw: Birds of Prey! I almost didn’t go due to not feeling great, so I’m glad I bucked up and saw it with some friends. Last thing I googled: If you ignore the numerous Castlevania-related things in the last 24 hours, then it’s “cat keeps sneezing.” If not, then it’s “castlevania vampire generals” because being totally frank, I didn’t even know the generals with no lines in the first two seasons had names until recently. Other blogs: I haven’t been on it in ages and actually forgot the password, but once I get on that I’ll get back to you. xD Do you get asks? Not really, but I stick around for the people who’re kind enough to take that interest! I keep all the ask/rp prompts tagged neatly in links on my profile so if someone new comes by one day and wants to interact, it’ll be easy for them to. Reason for your url: The original concept for Pepper was very much a mosquito-like cryptid created for a certain purpose, hence the mosquito. The diabolik part is because I originally joined Tumblr to find a community for Diabolik Lovers (due to some other writing sites being very.. standoffish if you don’t write canons/don’t exclusively write gay ships), but now it’s just all kinds of vampire hell. Once I actually get into some more vampy verses you can bet I’ll be writing/reblogging stuff from those as well! and yes I am looking for more recommendations in that vein (heh, puns) if anyone has some. Average amount of sleep: Erm.. 3-12 hours. During the week it’s about 3-5, and weekends is sometimes my “catch up” time where I still stay up quite late, but actually sleep in to let my body get some rest. Lucky number: It’s always been 9, and it tends to come up a lot in odd places so I might have to stick with it. Currently wearing: An old super comfy high school t-shirt and shorts, complete with a coat of long hair courtesy of my cat who was just laying on me. Dream job: Honestly? Still figuring that out. I’m going on a clinical psych track at the moment, but I’ve been doing a bit of soul-searching and testing to see if I’m actually strong enough for the therapist/clinician route I was originally after. I just don’t know if I’m strong enough just yet to settle into a job where I could very well have to help abusers in their early stages, something that I have no doubt will be upsetting to me personally. I’m a bit of an empath at times so it’d be excellent for the job, but I also feel I’d take it home with me which is dangerous. I don’t feel like I’m smart enough for psychology research on regular basis, though, so I have some thinking to do. Thankfully I’m still getting my bachelor’s so it’s not like I’m hard-pressed to immediately figure it out. On a lighter note, smol me was very much convinced I would be a marine biologist due to my love of the ocean and my skill in scuba diving, but that evaporated when research told me they travel nonstop and frequent travel makes me anxious Dream trips: I’ve been on a cruise a couple times and the experiences were honestly life-changing for one odd reason or another, be it how that time had me interact with my family and the things I got to see and experience. There’s a strange sense of freedom, even though you’re mostly confined to a boat. I’d love to visit Ireland and Germany since it’s where almost my entire family come from and often the landscape is beautiful, and since our culture’s kind of been watered down after a few generations living here I’d like to connect with that. Favorite foods: I have like 2-3 cups of tea in a day and keep exploring all kinds of new types, so that’d probably be it literally. Ones that I idealize in my head though wheeze would probably be things like steak, or scallops, or a specific kind of ice cream shaved ice thing I had once that legitimately made me tear up because it was so good.  Play any instruments? I tried to pick up the coronet in grade school since my dad played the trumpet and I thought it’d be fun, but I had some trouble memorizing the order of notes for songs, and it all kind of fell apart after an instructor dented up my instrument with a drumstick and tried to refuse to apologize/pay for it. (Yes, seriously, but that’s a story for another time. xD)
Of course I’ll pass the blessing and say anyone who wants to do this absolutely should, but I’m also gonna tag @sherbetcoloured , @natacular , @lachrymosestorm , and @l-e-w-d-y (provided they’d like to do it, of course)
12 notes · View notes