#this is so stupid. im stupid. don't try to buy these | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

trashmuis · 1 month

Text

hey did you guys know you can get oreos with photos on them? they would be so incredibly expensive and i know im literally losing my mind, because why did i do this, but what if...

#April Fools is a silly day #i REALLY dont know why i did this but here they are in oreo form ig #*big shrug*#i wanna bite them #this is so stupid. im stupid. don't try to buy these #yes you can get 4 of each but they'd cost like $120 hahaha no im not kidding #Texas Chainsaw Massacre #The Texas Chainsaw Massacre #tcm #horror #movies #sweets

24 notes · View notes

moeblob · 5 days

Text

I'm sorry for the OC brain rot on main....

(the lines are from a post about "tag yourself: awkward/unflirty Sims edition" and honestly? all my OCs are awkward/unflirty so ... yeah...)

#my characters #they (my OCs in general) are not mine if they don't pine and fail at romance #and the fact one of the options WAS actually ask an inappropriate question??? deacon coded if there was ever something deacon coded #i have so many stupid ideas for ymber having the worst comments that he THINKS would be flattering in his head and then he hears it out lou #and is like oh no that was awful im going to be abandoned for that and i deserve it oh wow dang that was so bad #both of them are trying so hard to be supportive and learn about the other and somehow its working?#no one else knows HOW it works but ok buddy #like i saw a mug in a coffee shop that i DESPERATELY want to draw in the modern au i have #with Oh handing it to Ymber saying AH HA found a mug I can gift Deacon the next time you fuck up with talking to him #and then doesn't buy it but is thinking about it and then later that day Ymber says something v blunt and non flattering #and Oh just ARE YOU KIDDING ME I DONT HAVE DEACONS GIFT BC YOU SAID YOUD TRY HARDER AT THIS #the mug in question said #congrats on your breakup we hated him #and there were sparkles around breakup #and it was so funny to me i just .... thinking about how much Oh would love to give it to deacon as a sorry my friend is so bad at this #i really wanna draw more of the sims fail options with the others in the plot but hey i can post it on my side blog and spare you all here #i was thinking about a fanart idea earlier this morning and completely forgot it by the time i sat down to draw #gomen gomen i was gonna try to not do ocs on main but.... alas....

39 notes · View notes

bsaka7 · 6 months

Text

every time i buy new running shoes im like oh i won't get the brooks adrenaline I'll try something new (<- guy who has had basically every moderate stability running shoe on the market) and then i try on a couple of others and im like yep. getting the brooks again.

#I will say i don't like the 23 as much as the 22 #And I think there's one in like the last 9yrs I've skipped... Maybe like 20 or smth like that #The 19 was my fav like Brooks just bring it back 😭#Ok technically it's every OTHER time i buy running shoes bc i usually have one pair of Brooks and one pair of something else #though they're both workhorse trainers i never have a speed shoe #i was almost swayed by the saucony guide today but they didn't have the arch support i wanted and i didn't want to buy new inserts #bc im trying to be DONE with inserts #Since they discontinued the ones I used which were like the lightest additional amount of support #And I've had no trouble without em in the last year #So maybe this is stupid of me. But I'll do my hip exercises and knock on wood #Tetrapod runs #Also my feet were feeling picky today... Idk if it was #Cuz it was post run or what #Literally ran in my old destroyed brooks today and I was like this sucks so bad -> buys new shoes #Oh I haven't had the NB equivalent shoe. Or the hoka or the altra. BUT I'VE HAD ALL THE OTHERS.

10 notes · View notes

fabulouslygaybean · 9 months

Text

im so sad that tomorrow (technically today but i haven't gone to bed yet so shhhh) is our final day here in california. we head out for the airport at noon and im just gonna miss my family out here a lot :(

#everyone came together this year #like. i don't think ive seen this many members of my family in one place since i was still in elementary school. IF it was even close #at the peak of the trip there were like.... 17 of us in one house. that's a lot for us!!!!#i already miss everyone we've said goodbye to #we're staying at my uncle's house tonight and he said he kinda wants to try taking us out for super early morning sushi because im a huge -#- sushi enjoyer and since we leave at noon it has to be early #despite the fact that im sad to go home and that im gonna miss all my family out here so much. its kind of nice to go home #im excited to sleep in my own bed in my own room with my own blankets and all of my stupid stuffed animals again #still. i love my family out here so so much #my uncle said that he's thinking about buying me a ticket out here again as a graduation celebration and that's both scary and exciting #ive never traveled alone before and i don't know how it'll work out but. im excited about the possibility #anyways #idk. i miss everyone so much #but i have to head home at some point

2 notes · View notes

piplupod · 2 years

Text

man i guess im back wtf

howdy sbdjdkl that whole thing was. stupid.

im sorry that everyone made a big deal out of me being gone, i WISH i was still gone tbh dbfjdkl

#like i get the point of putting me away was so i didnt off us because i was probably going to but jesus dhfhdjdl #why am i back already shfhdkl #(because apparently ppl actually want me around even tho I'm constantly in the way and being self destructive)#but still. that was so stupid. a WEEK. A SINGLE WEEK.#(this upcoming sentence is fully a joke ->) maybe if i threaten to kermit again then i can get another longer break :)#GODDDD I DON'T RLY WANT TO BE HERE LOL #on the plus side Nine mowed the lawn and bought cream soda so now i dont have to mow and i can drink cream soda instead BSHDHFKDL #however Cal and Nine DID use up all the cheese curds and didnt buy anymore so no poutine for me i guess smh #(im trying to be light-hearted here dhfjdkl i rly genuinely think I should've been put away for longer. feeling bad.)#also i woke up yesterday but i thought I'd be put back into dormancy today so i didnt say anything #RIP me i guess dbfjdkdl I dont like this #pippen needs 2nd breakfast

4 notes · View notes

fooltofancy · 2 years

Text

we have colors! not as bad as i was a lil afraid of based on the bruising around my fingers, but that was just a compression issue. we also don't get to look at The Thing for more than like three seconds because apparently in the last ten years stitches make me wanna pass out.

#hate deeper tissue stitching actually #i am gonna have A Scar #a very stupid scar to add to my collection of stupid scars #i can just. feel my whole hand though dude might actually cry about it #god i am not looking forward to this for the right hand BUT the difference between them now is insane #wound mention #idk ask to tag im trying not to be specific lmao #i have gauzed it so as not to look at it #problem solving #need to go buy actual tape the stuff in the cupboard is not meant for this specifically #txt.me #need a tattoo that just says 'don't forget your text tag'#real memento hours in here

2 notes · View notes

horanghey · 22 days

Text

sometimes im grateful that i basically wasnt allowed to wear makeup growing up but other times (like now) I'm so annoyed that i never went against my mom and just experimented with products

#like for graduation im going bare faced because I have literally no products and I'm not about to go and buy some and experiment with stuff #for such an important event ygm #and the grateful part is mainly because Im so susceptible to hating my appearance that makeup would just make things worse for me #like filters made me believe i looked like someone i don't and when i would see my actual face and i didn't like what i saw #......still trying to fix that tbh but i have a loooong way to go #and i know w makeup i would start to prefer my face with it to the point where id find my bare face ugly..........#but anyway....these eye bags aren't going anywhere and i look sickly (bc anemia and stress hahahahaha) and the only way to look even a litt #decent would be to do makeup but IM NOT GONNA DO THAT #literally tried practicing eyeliner last week and i did so bad that i knew there was no way #i could practice and get good before next week LDKSAFJLDKJSAFKD #damn thats a lot of tags....#sorry i had coffee when i didnt need the caffeine and I'm avoiding starting this paper #so here i am yapping about something stupid #tastalks

0 notes

anaalnathrakhs · 2 months

Text

i WILL show up to the trial day for the preparatory class tomorrow no matter how much i dont want to and after that i guarantee NOTHING

#broadcasting my misery #vent #this is a lie i guarantee i will keep tumbling through life appearing functional and melting down in the privacy of my own home afterwards #<- trying to jinx my naturally contrarian ass into taking care of myself for once #god i'm tired #i am. slightly peeved.#around 11am i was like ''i think i'm going to go home'' and my friend was like WHAT nooooooo what are you going to do at home anyway #and we ended up hanging out w another friend until fucking 4pm #and she was like oooooh guys i think i'm gonna go else i wont have energy tomorrow #haha bitch where was this mindset when i told you i was going to go home #i don't know why i keep like. telling people stuff like ''i'm [emotion] i'm going to [thing]''#and they just plan stuff w me anyway #and like. i can't decide for them what's important or not to them. so i make an effort and i participate to the best of my ability.#but it KEEPS HAPPENING #OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN #it does not stop #i can barely keep the violent impulses down tbh i act like im on crack in public #bc if i dont walk around and spasm like an epileptic stray cat im gonna start giving in to the urge to dive under a bus or punch someone #i have nearly uncontrollable fits of hitting my head against walls when my entire life i was too chicken to do it despite trying to #i gained about fifteen to twenty fucking kilograms in the last three months #because i cannot fucking stop binging and EVERYBODY'S LIFE seems to revolve around food #my friends are incapable of hanging out without going to buy smth no matter at which time we get out of school #my other friends seem incapable of not checking calories VERY LOUDLY and calculating how much they lost walking around #my mom and i are home and awake at the same time abt two hours a day and one and a half of that is spent making/eating dinner lmao #im making the effort holy shit i am but i'm going to start being violent soon #i've started trying to strangle my cat twice in the past week i think #i'll show up tomorrow bc it's an opportunity and im not stupid enough to miss that by lack of self esteem #but really what is it good for #my friend isnt very delicate in her way to say it but she's right. i'm not cut out for being normal like that #i can sorta seem functional but you very quickly start seeing i don't know how to dress

0 notes

omgchloe · 11 months

Note

I’m so glad you got Eras tour tickets!!!!

AHHHHHHH GIRL! Me fuckin too dude! This whole week trying to secure these tickets has been the most insane and stressful experience of my life I HAVE AGED 45 YEARS BUT it's okay bc I have tickets I am going to eras I am seeing my emotional support pop star again

#i literally sat on the floor in my back room with my work laptop like a feral raccoon for 4 hours trying to get tickets #but couldn't get passed the fucking ticketek waiting lounge #then half an hour later my best friend on melb called me at work screaming THAT SHE GOT US TICKETS FNDKSKDN #SO EXCITING #i was a lil sad still cause taylor shows is something i do with my sister and bc of the 4 x ticket cap i wouldn't be able to #but then #BUT THEN #AT 7:30PM #9 HOURS AFTER THEY WENT ON SALE #MY COUSIN GOT THROUGH TO THE BUY SCREEN #AND GOT US TICKETS TO SYDNEY!!!!!#NDKSNSOAMAKSNDNSKNSKSJDJDKEJDJD IM GONNA CRY #I AM SOOOOO LUCKY #FUCK i'm gonna CRY #that stupid fucking ticketek queue was literally chosing accounts at random and MY GIRLIES GOT THROUGH!!#LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME #anyways don't yell at me going twice i literally fucking deserve this #taylor swift shows are my safe place and i'm sooooo so so so happy i get to experience this again with my absolute favourite people

1 note · View note

rafeandonlyrafe · 2 months

Text

twinkle twinkle little star

words: 700

warnings: 18+ only, smut, dom/sub undertones, fluffy <3, reader is called kid and stupid, clit rubbing

“rafeyyy.” you whine, squirming underneath the thin blanket covering the two of your bodies.

“baby.” rafe grunts out, his voice deep with what he wishes was sleep. “go to bed.”

“i can't! im trying really!” you complain.

rafe sighs, tugging you closer, back into his grip that you wiggled away from trying to find a comfortable position.

“just close your eyes, kid.”

you try. you really do. you shut your eyes, pray for your body to relax, but to no avail as you squirm again, causing rafe to sigh.

“alright. hold on.” he moves, sitting himself up against the headboards, arms open as you crawl into his lap, letting him cradle you in his big arms.

“this better you big baby?” he coos, rocking you softly from side to side, letting out a small groan as your bum moves against his lap.

“mhm.” you nod, resting your head against rafes chest. you close your eyes, sleep is so close, but yet when rafe tries to move you back so he can lay down, your eyes blink open.

“fuck, you're still not asleep?” rafe groans.

“im sorry!” you whine. “im trying, really. just can’t.”

“alright, shit.” rafe moves your body for you, laying your head into the crook between his chest and shoulder, arm caging your body close.

his free hand moves to your chest, massaging your tits through your silk nightgown.

you let out a low moan, eyes fluttering closed as rafe switches back and forth between your breasts, rubbing and massaging them gently enough to allow it to be relaxing instead of just turning you on.

“stupid baby, didn't even realize she couldn't sleep just because she was horny.” rafe coos, pressing a kiss to your forehead. your eyelashes flutter open, looking up at rafe.

“it's okay, kiddo.” he says. “im gonna take care of you.”

his hand moves lower to dive between your thighs, smirking to himself when he feels your flimsy underwear. he has a habit of ripping them off whenever he wants access to you, so you've given up on buying high quality material just for it to be destroyed.

“gonna rub your little cunnie for you, mkay?” rafe makes sure you nod.

his finger strokes over your underwear, right through your center. you try not to squirm around, opening your legs up slightly to give rafe more access. he presses a kiss to your head when you spread your thighs, muttering out a quiet affirmation.

“thats my good girl.”

“i-”

“shh.” rafe pets his finger over your clit before dipping lower, feeling how the wet spot has formed on your underwear.

rafe pushes your underwear to the side, unable to restrict himself any longer from feeling your bare skin. he lets out a hum of approval as he moves his fingertip through your slick.

he continues to hum, soft familiar melodies. rafe is no singer, but if he was he'd be cooing you gentle lullabies as he continues to gently rock you, two fingers now gliding through your folds.

“ohhh, thats it.” rafe hums as your eyes close, unable to keep them open any longer. you're sure to be out as soon as his fingers bring you to orgasm.

he moves up to your clit, wanting to get you off quickly so he can get to sleep himself.

“big day tomorrow, bunny.” he presses more kisses to your forehead and hairline. “gonna take you shopping.”

if this was the first you'd heard of the news, you'd certainly be wide awake and excited, but rafe has been promising you a whole day just the two of you for a while now. shopping, dinner, walk on the beach, anything you decide.

“mmm love you.” you whisper as rafe rubs his two fingers over your clit, your thighs squeezing in closer to his hand as your high builds.

“love you too baby. cum for me then we can get some sleep, yeah?” rafe resumes his humming with twinkle twinkle little star.

you let out soft mewls and moans that are the perfect accompaniment to his song, rafe playing you like an instrument with his fingers on your clit.

you don't need to tell him that you're close, you're certain he knows from the rush of wetness, the way your clit pulses as he rubs faster until your entire body stiffens, then your back arches as you let out a moan.

rafe rubs you through your orgasm until you slump in his arms, high replaced by pure exhaustion, falling asleep before rafe even lays you back down.

“mmm, that's my girl.” rafe kisses your head once more as he readjusts you in bed, eyes sliding closed now that you're content and asleep in his arms.

taglist: @drewstarkeyslut @forstarkey @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @drudyslut @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450 @babygorewhore @vanessa-rafesgirl @michelleisheres-blog @outerbankspov @drewstarkeyswifehoe @cutielando @kamninaries @rafeyslove @rafeinterlude @bellbottombaby @deeaardiary @rubixgsworld @wearemadeofstardust0 @leighbronk @starkeysheart @pradabambie @tobesolovelysstuff @alexiskirkland @rafestar @brioffthegrid @juniebugg @magicalyoura @cokepewpsii @mysticallystilinski @luvdella @aerangi @vogueprincess @yourenogoodforme @auryyz @mayhem-72 @thestarlithideout @marvelfanfics1recs @rafesgiirl @ditzyzombiesblog @chiaraanatra

2K notes · View notes

thekittenkait · 1 year

Text

i hate i hate i hate exam phase

#i am so done #i am not even fucking exhausted as fuck anymore #no that was last week. when i fell asleep during work. twice.#while sitting in front of the laptop. at a 4pm on a wednsday #i now am just filled to the brink with nervous energy (i am sure the 4 coffees sine 10pm help against THAT)#and still unable to actuall DO anything for my exans #which is so stupid. it's even stupid to say it bc i AM doing shit for my exams #i spend at least 4 hours today doing shit for my exams #but it's not enough it's not enough it's not enough #and at the same time my brain decides that now is a great time to fixate on a new thing so much #that i am considering buying a fucking HORROR GAME for 60 bucks even tho i literally know all the endings already #bc i hsve been obsessively watching let's plays and what nots #also managed to complete fuck up my sleeping schedule so that's AMAZING (definitely not the coffers fault. nope. nope. nope)#(at least im not tired anymore)#and it's gonna be okay #I'm gonna be okay #i just need to pass those exams #(pls brain. work. pls. study.)#and even if i don't pass i will be okay EVENTUALLY (bc i have too much shit to do to worry about only having one try left)#i just.#need something #don't know what #but if i spend another week with my heart beating out of my chest every night at 4am I'm gonna cey #i haven't unclenched my jaw in two weeks. i'm pretty sure #I'm gonna be okay tho #I'm just being dramatic #I'll go to tandem tomorrow. I'll go to (another) study group meeting tomorrow. i will do the exams on tuesday.#i will clean the kitchen on tuesday. i will work on wednesday and thursday. i will do the exam on friday.#i will study for the exam on the tuesday after that. and then. and then I'll do the fucking experiment for my master thesis #i have a plan worked out. it's gonna be okay.

0 notes

bitchimasnake-sss · 7 months

Text

"my girlfriend's a nerd" ft. the monster trio!

self explanatory self-indulgent drabbles to soothe my book!loving ass

ft. luffy, zoro and sanji x fem! reader

set-up: you like books, he likes you that's it

warnings: none lmao this is very sfw. one might call it wholesome even.

luffy:

thats my baby ^^

— im not even sure if this mf can read 😭😭

— honestly 9/10 chance he can't but when has that ever stopped him from being our most supportive himbo king

— go king give us everything!!

— he doesn't get why you read books when instead you can be like sleeping or eating or looking at the sea but well, he doesn't question it

— he just thinks it's a weird hobby you have (i don't think he's aware of how freakishly illiterate he is)

— but just cause he thinks it's weird that doesn't mean he wouldn't hug you half-asleep when he hears you sobbing into the dead of the night or he wouldn't listen with keen interest when you explain the plot of your favourite book as he wraps his arms around you and hums into your hair

— will 100% offer to fight the author/ tear up the book everytime he sees you having a breakdown over a particular scene/character

"who should I kill?!" the deadpan seriousness in his voice is what terrifies you

"nobody! I'm okay–"

— after you explain to him that hurting somebody is not necessary and you're fine, he will try to coddle you with extended hugs and food (lots and lots and lots of food).

"yn you should eat something! should I get you something to eat??" you can hear the panic in this poor boys voice 😭😭

"no luffy, its okay. im fine!" you say through sniffs and snorts, eyes bloodshot from crying over ink on paper

"brb" and he gets you dinner enough for 5 people because that's how he knows to comfort you (willingly took sanjis kicks and namis punches to accomplish this mission)

— since he's a clingy little child, he will hold onto you some way or the other when you're reading

— you're reading in your room while he's fast asleep? his arm is draped across your waist lazily. you're on the other side of the deck, sunbathing and reading? his hand is stretched out from where he's sitting and on your thigh (ussop tripped thrice over his hand, rip god ussop 🙏) . you're reading during breakfast cause the book just got so good? his toe is rubbing your calf up and down periodically (he won't stop no matter how many weird looks you give him)

— conclusion: he doesn't at all get it what it is, but if it makes you happy he will spend all the berries in the world to buy you those books (plz know if you actually ask him to jokingly off an author for killing your favourite character, he will do it. please don't ask him that.)

— he's just so supportive and nice 😭😭

"my girlfriends a nerd, I love her" (ussop explained to him what a nerd was and now he's introducing you like this to everybody)

zoro:

the shades tho 😎

— I'm convinced this mf can't read either

— even he can there's like literally no evidence to prove it and the entire crew has come to the conclusion that he gets lost even with clear directions because he just can't read please 😌👌

— at the start, he actually thinks it's dead stupid to invest so much time reading books when you can do other stuff like getting stronger, sleeping, literally doing anything else (luffy backs up his opinion with full enthusiasm)

— i mean like he's seen you sob at 7 in the morning over breakfast cause your fav character died and now he's confused as to why are you spending money and buying books if they make you cry so hard (he doesn't understand the concept of angst im afraid)

— but over time he just accepts it as something you enjoy and well, if it makes you happy then who is he to question it?

— acts like he doesn't care/isn't listening when you're rambling about the plot and how thE MAIN CHARACTER IS IN LOVE WITH HIS ENEMY AND VICE VERSA SKEJFHSJKSN but is actually fully listening

— he's actually invested at one point

"but they are enemies? why does he wanna be with him?"

"you don't get it! thats the appeal!!"

"the appeal is forcing a knife on somebody's throat?" he's laughing, "as if you'd enjoy it if i threatened you with my swords"

"... i would actually enjoy that"

he is now asking nami for loan to send you to a therapist (nami has seen you nosebleed over fictional characters and is considering giving money away to zoro for free. you really do need help.)

— as I said, he's invested now (although he does question your taste every now and then) but he'd force you to either summarize the plot to him as he trains or read out loud so he can hear the story as it goes.

— so naturally you're now sitting on his back, reading out loud as he does push-ups

— this beloved himbo has now formed strong opinions about characters and will battle you with headcanons because "there's no fucking way the hero would ever go back to the villain after that! that's ridiculous! if he does I'll sell my swords off."

— will remember the stuff you told him, no matter how trivial, so if you get off an island and he spots a keychain from your fav book series he's spending whatever money he has left to buy you it

"oh excellent choice! who are you buying it for?" the shopkeeper lady questions aloud

"oh, my girlfriend." he's smiling, "my girlfriends a nerd."

— actually looks forward to you telling him all the plot details and jokes at this point (one might call him a part of the fandom now)

— when you're a crying, sobbing mess because a character died, he's genuinely comforting you (no matter how bad he is at it)

"yn it's okay, you want some sake?" he is hugging you, patting your head like you're a child

"no 😭😭" you sob harder into his chest

"well... that's the best i can offer"

he tried. it's not his fault you don't wanna drink your feelings away.

— conclusion: he started off thinking its stupid and now he's an honorary nerd. would never admit it though. stubborn asshole.

sanji:

he's actually so pretty tho ^^

— he actually liked reading books before you even joined the crew although his tbr consists of cookbooks and auto-biographies about the people he has some interest in

— he started reading so that he could impress zeff with his knowledge on cooking and other miscellaneous stuff (imagine kid!sanji reading a book till late night under a lamp cause he wants to impress his old man that's so cute 😭😭)

— respects your hobbies when he finds out you like reading

— and then he sees your book collection. whY ARE THERE LIKE 5000 BOOKS HERE?! NOW HES SCARED FOR YOUR SANITY CAUSE GIRL WTF

— he hears you recommend a book to robin/nami once and now he's running to the nearest bookstore on the next island you guys land on to buy it

— he obviously did it to impress you and win you over but goddamn that book was actually pretty nice. so, the next time he asks you for recommendations he's actually a bit sincere

— now you're both in a book club of your own (which makes luffy mad cause why are you leaving him out of conversations :/)

— like zoro, he often asks for updates on the book you're currently reading while he cooks everyone food. he loves hearing you talk about the things you like.

— when he sees you crying over books, he is making you sweet stuff to soothe you, holding you and rubbing your back supportingly, peppering kisses to make you feel better

— he's so fine 😫😫

— anyways, also def the kind of person to ask you to roleplay things in real life

"yn-saaaan" his voice is bubbly, "can i ask you something?"

"mhm?"

"the last book you read–" his face is going a little bit red, "you think we can maybe... do that irl?"

now it's your turn to go red

— but no fr, he's so so supportive of your little hobby like yes baby! read those books and have fun imagining people in your head

— 100% matches your vibe when you crush on fictional characters cause "you're right. he is actually very attractive" (a bi king we love)

— once zoro made fun of you for reading and this was his response: "you can't even read, mosshead. the next time you speak shit I'll kick your ass."

"who said I CANT READ? AND AS IF ILL LET YOU KICK MY ASS!"

"I TOTALLY WILL KICK YOUR ASS"

now they are fighting while ussop, luffy and chopper laugh in the background

— but yes he loves staying up late, reading with you before you both cuddle and fall asleep

— you once read about a specific sort of dish in a book and mentioned that it sounds delicious so now obviously he has to go make that dish. it doesn't matter if it's 1 am at night.

— when nami asks him what he's cooking, he just smiles and shrugs, "i dunno either, im just trying to make yn happy. she's such a nerd"

— conclusion: an enabler, an enthusiast. this man is ready to buy you books and then read them if it makes you happy. only the finest for his favourite lady <3

a/n: enjoy my wayward thoughts about these fine men!

1K notes · View notes

chuulyssa · 28 days

Text

🇸 🇵 🇦 🇳 🇰 !

BSD MEN REACTING TO YOU SPANKING THEM.

↷ A/N ─ as usual please leave likes and reblogs to show support :D i love spoiling you guys !! now please tell me to go study i need some motivation :(

★ FT. ─ dazai , chuuya , ranpo , akutagawa , fyodor

!! TAGS ─ spanking, mentions of smut

MATURE THEMES, 16+, MENTIONS OF AND IMPLIED SMUT

*spanks*

ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ.

momentarily surprised but quickly recovers

smiles and turns to you

it's like you just gave him a treat :D you can almost see his tail wagging as if he's a dog (he hates dogs btw grrr)

he believes that you spanking his ass gives HIM permission to do the same to YOU :( how mean of him

so he catches you off guard by spanking your ass

and you two end up chasing each other down to take turns spanking each other. whoever loses does the dishes tonight

"You've been very good today; you even completed your punishment for provoking me," he says, engulfing you in a cuddle after you returned from doing the dishes.

ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ.

chokes on air this time (yes chuuya chokes in every single scenario of mine but he's the one choking you at night so its ok !! :D)

he's surprised because wtf?? he's the one supposed to be doing that conventionally????

defo spanks you back but tries to be as soft as possible because he's a gentleman

i think this is already an hc but he's an ass guy so once you've spanked him don't think he's gonna leave u at all

i did say his spanks are gonna be as soft as he can make them be but i never said how many 🤪😇

"Count," he hisses. It's midnight, and you're at his mercy. After his long and hard day at work, he needs something to relieve his stress.

ʀᴀɴᴘᴏ.

stops your hand mid-air because duh he already knew about what you were gonna do

twists and turns and ends up holding your ass and squeezing it

all the while you're like wtf is wrong with you

his eyes make it look like he's enjoying it sm :( such a kitty cat

im still mad they didn't give us a whole separate scene for his ass :< anyone who's read the manga, any pics you wanna share? 👁

"You need to buy me extra candy for putting up with your stupidity," he rolls his eyes, pinching your cheek.

ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ.

his reflexes immediately act and you see rashomon from the back of his coat

but then he realizes its you...

and he FLUSHES. YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THIS MAN BLUSH

well now you have :D his poor virgin ass

not a virgin anymore once he started dating you u horny ass mf /lh

he has literally no idea how to reply to that

he just shrugs cluelessly

"I guess I should return the favour?" he tries to sound confident but ends up delivering the lightest, most gentle spank. He doesn't want to hurt you. He loves you.

ꜰʏᴏᴅᴏʀ.

DISGUSTED™

one, because he's another virgin (virgin slander less gaurr 💪🏻 even tho im one myself; its the self burn guys !!)

and two, for the last time STOP. MESSING. WITH. HIS. RELIGIOUS. SELF.

you're SATAN in his eyes, trying to distract him and make him sin (as if he isn't a murderer and a terrorist cough cough)

if we're being delusional enough he'll leave the room with a faint pink on his cheeks 🤡

definitely returns the favour at night 🤭🤭 (only if you're married tho!!)

"My sole undivided attention is all yours now," he hits your ass again. "Anything to say? Hm? Why not? You were all for giggling at my face today. What's wrong now?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

512 notes · View notes

flor4de4amor · 11 days

Note

hockey abby 🌀🌀🌀

oh i need her so bad. want her so bad. also ik nothingggg abt hockey so don't beat me up guys.

click for palestine | dont buy tlou | read b4 engaging w me

hockey!abby who's actually a sweetie. beast on the ice. monster of a coach and captain, but such a sweet girlfriend. she's always more than happy to see you out in the stands, wearing her large jersey, cheering her on.

hockey!abby who coaches little league hockey. she loves kids, but they're awful. and by awful, they're actually hilarious. she has to stifle laughter during practice and reprimand them, but once she's home with you she's telling you everything.

hockey!abby who's definitely got a light 'hockey accent.' she denies it with her life. she hasn't got an accent, its you who's got an accent! but you've got videos of her saying "sorry" like a filthy canadian. she swears on her life it's a deepfake video of her. how could you do that to your pretty baby? she trusted you. what's next, fake news of her losing a game? gosh, papparazzi these days.

hockey!abby who brings you out on the ice when she's the only one practicing. slipping skates on your feet carefully, and holding your hand softly. she'd race you but you'd totally lose, and she doesn't wanna hurt your feelings.

hockey!abby who's fights with the ref every chance she gets. she gets heated quick and easy. whenever she loses because of a stupid ref call, you never hear the end of it.

"that ref is a fucking asshole. why's she even a ref? i can do a better job than her." she rolled her eyes.

whenever she's pissed, its easier to butter her up and stroke her ego. "you would, but you're a much better player baby," you take her hand and kiss her pulse point. "besides, i'd miss watching you play on the ice."

she smiles to herself, "when you're right you're right babe." she agrees, humming.

hockey!abby who is always in the penalty box. always swearing off on the ice. she's one of the few female players who does start fights on the ice, and they are brutal. blood flying, helmets clashing, sticks thrashing. she always makes you kiss her bruises better, and you always oblige. smiling against each scab and scolding her when finished.

hockey!abby who is always ending up in tik tok edits and has the most obscene comments. it drives you mad, but it just confuses her. cause her entire page is a shrine of you and your realtionship. she does post herself here and again. gym selfies, post practice drill check ins, once or twice with her hair out. which everyone knows, is a real panty dropper. but they're totally innocent pictures! she's got her eyes on you and you only! she replies to vulgar comments with corny stuff like:

'im happily married!'

'my gf shook her head in disgust when she read this'

'plz stop trying to build a wedge btw me n my girl! our cats won't like this!'

hockey!abby who always goes to speaker events and is incredibly passionate about women in sports. she encourages young girls to get engaged as young as possible. she always wants to uplift morale and increase the amount of girl in sports, especially her sport.

hockey!abby oh hockey!abby.

418 notes · View notes

redr0sewrites · 3 months

Note

"Will elaborate on dry humping and sounding Vox if asked" I am asking. I am asking you to elaborate. I am thinking about the fact that he can't stay still when someone sits in his lap and ends up cumming in his pants about it and I am asking. I am thinking about double-tapping him with a vibrating sounding rod and an also vibrating strap until he knocks out power in the whole city and I Am Asking,

RAAAAA IVE GOTTEN SM ASKS TO ELABORATE LMAO- IM MOSTLY GONNA TALK AB THE SOUNDING IN THIS ONE CUZ NONNIEEEE U READ MY MINDDDDD

🥀Cw: smut, sub!vox, sounding, overstimulation, dirty talk, slapping, master kink, humiliation kink, SOFT AFTERCARE!!!, you fuck him in front of his camera so he can watch himself, no joke yall fuck until he passes out

🥀minors dni

you're prob the one to suggest sounding to vox, its pretty casual and offhand but it piques his interest

after you first suggest sounding to vox he is..... intrigued to say the least

he does his own secret research on it and he ends up getting hard just thinking about it, which eventually leade to him begging you to try it

vox is both excited and slightly nervous, he knows that it will feel good and he trusts you, but there's something about being so vulnerable that gets to him

you end up buying a vibrating sounding rod, much to his delight

he def wants a rod with lots of ridges/beads, he wants to be able to feel it inside him...

vox has definitely taken your strap before so you start with that, fingering him and loosening his hole until hes practically sucking you in

the two of you are seated in his room of screens and monitors, with vox's legs spread wide so he can watch himself get double tapped and fucked by you

hes definitely squirming on your strap, thrusting backwards and demanding you to get on with it, he's truly a brat at first

you decide to let it slide, he'll be punished soon enough

vox is already hard by the time you're sliding the sounding rod in, and his cock twitches against your palm as the rod finally bottoms out

at this point hes already a mess, he can barely stay still with the rod and the strap both brushing against that spot so deep inside him, its too much and too little at the same time

ever so slowly, you begin to thrust your strap in and out of him, all the while gently toying with the tip of the sounding rod as he squirms, struggling not to toss his head back as he glitches and whines

slowly he begins to adjust, mumbling incoherently as his orgasm washes over him, yet unable to come from the sounding rod...

"fuck- 'm s'full..." "s'too much, please~" "i- i'm gonna-"

once you turn the vibrations on, hes GONE

start with the vibrating strap, and start fucking him rough too, thrusting deeper and harder as he goes crazy

he keeps trying to close his legs but you don't let him, one of your hands is digging into his thigh and keeping his legs spread while the other toys with him as you please~

vox is barely coherent enough to form words, hes babbling and whining as he glitches like crazy, sending soft static shocks and buzzes across your skin with each thrust

he cums almost instantly yet mewls and pleads with you to take out the sounding rod, to please please please let him truly come, hasn't he been so good?

and yet, you don't, thrusting deeper to fuck his prostate as you slide the rod in and out, fucking him stupid from both ends as tears stream down his screen

vox can watch himself getting wrecked on the screen in front of him, and the humiliation only turns him on more

you have to give him a few slaps on his thighs to get him to behave, hes so incoherent hes literally drooling all over himself as his eyes roll back

once you turn the vibrations on for the sounding rod? congrats you've killed your tv

vox moans so loud that his voice cracks and glitches, and static fills the air as all the electronics around you both start fizzing and crackling

even then you don't stop, hes moaning and whimpering as his hips jut with every thrust, he can feel the vibrations so deep inside him and it drives him absolutely crazy

hes a babbling mess, and when he comes for the final time that night, you cause a fucking blackout

the city outside goes quiet as all the lights and electronics around you shut down, including the monitors in front of you

the dark screen reflect vox's glitched, fucked out face as he slumps back against you, barely awake and mumbling softly under his breath

hes so far into subspace, hes def gonna need some aftercare, hes clinging to you like theres no tomorrow

he yelps when you take out the strap and sounding rod, hes still so sensitive :(

"i can't- chh-can't take it!" vox mewled, static buzzing in his voice as tears streamed down his face. "s'too full!" he let out another pathetic, whiny cry as you only fucked into him harder, gripping dark bruises into his hips. vox could feel the vibrations so deep inside him, each thrust bringing him even closer to euphoria as the vibrations reached his prostate. he babbles and whines, claws scrabbling at your thighs as you thrust the sounding rod ever so slightly deeper. the ridges add the perfect amount of friction inside his needy cock, juices streaming from the tip and pearling around the end of the sounding rod. "aww, are you close baby? d'you want your master to make you feel better?" you sneer, stroking his full cock as he moans and whimpers, struggling to form a coherent word.

"mngh~ mast-cch-master, plea-" vox buzzes, his face flickering between his wrecked expression and a fuzzy, glitched out screen. his eyes r wide and teary as he watches you absolutely ruin him, and the thought of someone else possibly seeing this only made him impossibly harder. as the coil in his abdomen tightens, vox's eyes roll back as the lights around you flicker and spark. "go on, baby, you can cum," you purr in his ear, giving him a few rough thrusts to push him over the edge. vox sobs, babbling and screaming your name like a prayer as you pull the rod out. he cums harder than he ever has before, and a broken, undignified moan falls past his lips as all the lights around you turn off with a soft pop. the screens in front of you are coated with his release, along with his thighs.

vox slumps back against you, his screen flickering as you realize he must've blacked out. it seemed the entire city had faced the same problem, considering the shocked cries from the streets below. you couldn't care less about anyone but the man in front of you, who is still fuzzy and incoherent from pleasure. you coo at vox as he begins to slowly float back to coherence, mumbling and clinging onto you. you slowly pull out, watching as he shudders and whimpers at the loss of the strap. "you okay darling?" you ask, and vox mumbles something you can't understand as he turns to face you. his screen is pink from embarrassment as he curls into you, and you press soft kisses to his shoulders while he nuzzles into your chest.

"you did so good for me baby, so good f'me," you whisper, accentuating each word with a kiss to his screen. vox whispers something else, his eyes glazed as he admires you adoringly. "what was that, hm? use your words," you whisper, and he whines. he must be really fucked out, you think, chuckling as he wraps his arms around your waist and pouts. "lets get you cleaned up, 'mkay?" you offer, attempting to stand and scoop him into your arms. "no," he grumbles, pulling you back down. "hold me. please," he whispers, and you marvel at the vulnerable side he's showing you. "of course, baby, i'm not going anywhere~"

HELP THE AMOUNT OF EFFORT I PUT INTO THIS IS CRAAAAZYYYYYY!!!! ILL ELABORATE MORE ON THE DRY HUMPING IN A SECOND POST, I GOT A LOOOOT OF ASKS IN MY INBOX ASKING ME TO ELABORATE SO ILL PROB TRY TO REPLY TO ALL OF THEM WITH SEPARATE LITTLE SCENARIOS ABOUT SOUNDING OR DRY HUMPING W VOX <3333 ANYWAYS HOPE YALL ENJOYED!!!!! i have such a vox bias, esp a sub vox bias, its not even funny💀

894 notes · View notes

verdure-vent · 2 years

Text

Vent

#shut up about the car shut up about the car shut UP about the CAR #it's triggering and stupid and every single timeline you've given me has fallen through #so just. SHUT UP. I know i need to save thousands of dollars to buy it from you. i know.#im going to. stop trying to tell me about when i might be able to if i save so much in so many months #i know. but Jesus h it upsets me SO much that i don't already have it. its so upsetting and triggering. just. shut up. fuck.#vent

0 notes