#this is so fucking funny thank you anon
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she alecto on my pause till i diagnose palamedes sextus as lactose intolerant
every day that tor doesn’t release to alecto cover i write another chapter of the slowburn coffeeshop au palamedes/milk fic
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rivals 2 and shth common factor is espio is in both those games. is this a coincidence? yes but its really funny. his presence just makes people wanna steal from tails. whether he tells them directly to or not
LMAOOOO. shadow after just hacking a computer with espio: wow i’m having this weird compulsion to steal from tails. again. i’m gonna do that immediately
#this is so fucking funny thank you anon#espio being the buddy in mad matrix hero makes makes it so much better#rambles
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your edward hyde gives me 3 in 1 shampoo bottle vibes /pos
maybe even 13 in one shampoo??
HELP!!! AHAT DOES THIS MEAN!!A!
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Least favorite ok ko character??
At first I was gonna say none BUT I actually do have two least favorite characters and it's these two assholes
Not only I dislike their designs I also HATE their personalities even more. I don't like being so negative but they have literally ZERO redeeming quality. They're just annoying judgy asshats. Plus they were absolutely awful friends to Rad for years!!! They made him become super insecure bc they kept insulting and belitting everything he liked, they're the reason why he started acting like a narcissistic jerk with Enid and then KO
In conclusion they're lame, stupid, and crappy people and I can't stand seeing them on screen
#am i projecting onto rad MAYBE#thank you for asking this anon bc i needed to unload all my hate and loathing#ugly asses i wont even bother learning their names#i swear i cannot stand them anytime they appear i just wanna skip all their scenes#BOOOOO TOMATO TOMATO TOMATO#like at least when other characters are being jerks they're also fun or interesting#but not these two they're just two insufferable frat boys#which is worse than being a criminal#at least boxman's crimes are funny as fuck ://#sorry these two piss me off so much#asks & answers#ok ko let's be heroes#ok k.o.! let's be heroes
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i would pay good money to read cersei’s complete live reaction to fire and blood. like i think the tyrion projection would go insane, she would think nettles was among the biggest antagonists, and she would constantly compare herself to daemon. like that inner monologue like “rhaenyra was a fool. if she was going to kill those two children she should’ve just killed all the greens, maybe by flooding the castle. she didn’t understand that younger brothers are the most dangerous beings alive. aegon was probably crawling around in the dragon pit instigating the small folk to rebel. fortunately i have my priorities straight, like daemon the rogue prince, which is what they would have called me if i were a man. if i see a shifty looking small folk i will kill them and their whole family, after interrogating them about their connection to tyrion. if i had a dragon like rhaenyra, that idiot, i could do it much faster.”
cersei and tyrion’s doing competitive dragon kinning as children while jaime was off running around in a field pretending to be a horse or something but WHO is going to actually follow through and blow up kings landing??? not tyrion
#absolutely none of them give a fuck about jason and tyland lannister#tywin lannister is soooooo sick and twisted for managing to destroy the lannister legacy of trickery#asoiaf#anon this was so fucking funny. thank you
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volition :)
YEAH!! volition :]!!
#de volition#volition#disco elysium#de skills#disco elysium skills#de#voliart#volta transmissions#thank you anon ive actually been meaning to post these and this ask was like the perfect excuse for it hkjgh he's a fucking. chibi now!!!#tiny knight. baby man. funny little darling stick in the mud. shimeji-fies his dork ass. i am so affectionate about him
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Let it be known that I love writing fluff, and I listen to character audios sometimes. SO! I came up with a cute idea for sagau imposter au. I heard somewhere that Xiao's adeptus form is a bird, so I wonder, what kind of bird? And that got me thinking. Xiao being a little song bird, or perhaps even a cardinal.
Now imagine: while looking for the imposter, Xiao stumbles upon them sitting beneath a tree, just feeding some birds. Said birds are absolutely loving the attention since the creator of Teyvat is giving them food and love!
Xiao watches, rather curious. The creator he knows hates birds, because they always dive and cause problems for them. But now... these little birds have completely abandoned any fear they may hold for human beings, happily landing on the hands and shoulders of this supposed imposter.
So he decides to test something.
Xiao turns into a small bird and approaches cautiously. In his smaller form, he's vulnerable to attack. But the person before him doesn't try to hurt him. Rather, they smile and call him "little friend" as they offer food to him. In his distrust, he bites them with his sharp beak.
His heart shatters when he sees divine blood spilling from the wound.
He's about to fly away, get as far away from here as he can. He found the true creator, and instead of worshipping them, he bit them! He caused them to bleed, he shouldn't even be near them-!
His mind stills when they pet his feathered head.
They murmur kind words to him, apologizing to him. They believed that they had startled him, that he bit to protect himself. They forgave him, they felt no hatred towards him, no anger or disappointment. Instead, they offered some chopped almonds, hoping he'd prefer that over bird seed.
He sang for them as he perched on their shoulder.
After that, he did his best to secretly protect the creator he'd harmed. He would adopt his smaller form and sing for them when they felt sad, and he'd use his human form to guard them from a distance. Yes, it made his chest ache whenever they looked at him with fear when they saw his more human form, but the yaksha only shook it off. It only made sense that you'd be scared. He was a frightening person, one that had tried to harm you before. He refused to try and change your feelings towards him. He didn't have the right.
He would be content to sing for you as a harmless bird.
-sibling anon (sorry if this is out of character for him I just like the idea)
oh….. he’s so soft…..
xiao hovering near the edge of the crowd, at first, drawing your attention since he doesn’t seem to be eating any of the seed you’d passed out.
when he finally hops within arms reach, you reach to nudge some of the food next to him closer, only to quickly whip your hand back. the birds around (on) you all flutter at the sudden movement, but you inspect your finger, the blue blood of teyvat welling up. your instinct is to stick it in your mouth, but that doesn’t seem safe considering a bird bit it, so you dab at it with a napkin.
the bird cries and flaps his wings, distraught, and your heart hurts. poor guy, you probably scared him, moving so quickly.
you pull out some chopped almonds from your pocket. the plan was to have them as a snack, but now… you put a few in your palm and close your hand around it, reaching forward to gently run two fingers over the birds back.
the other birds in the area seemed receptive to that, and this one does too, calming down considerably.
you take your hand back, opening your palm to drop the almonds on the floor, nudging them close before backing off.
“there you go,” you murmur, as the bird dips down to inspect the food. “i won’t hurt you.”
you allow yourself a silent cheer when it eats one of the almond pieces.
you see the small bird fluttering around you often, always on the edge of your vision. it’s easy to identify, the purple patch of feathers on its forehead easily standing out, and you’re always certain to push some food over to it. almonds, not birdseed.
the bird is a dark blue-teal, the underside of its wings a softer blue. it’s like no other bird you’ve seen in liyue, something that quickly catches your attention.
you brush some dirt off you as you stand, noting the way the bird immediately looks up from its food, unlike the others, to flap up into the tree you were sitting under.
you crack a smile, carefully reaching a finger for it. you’re slower this time, cautious of its skittish nature, but it lets you approach. when you carefully pet over its head, the birds eyes close.
your smile grows, and you try not to laugh at how confused the bird seems when you pull your hand away.
“i have to go,” you explain. “the millelith… they’re getting too close again. i won’t be able to see you again, little friend.”
the bird chirps, nearly indignant, and you do laugh this time. putting a small piece of almond on the branch in front of it, you wave goodbye to the other birds, seeing the blue one hadn’t touched the almond.
you frown. hopefully it’ll be alright….
xiao watches you until you’re out of sight, and even then, he stays on the branch.
you…. he’d forgotten you were being hunted by the millelith. he’d forgotten the order to look out for you. he’d forgotten the qixing called you a criminal.
who could blame him? it was easy to forget everything at your side, when you carefully ran your fingers over his feathers, scratching at his jaw with the edge of your nail. yes, he was vulnerable as a bird, but it was easy to be vulnerable with you. it was easy to be open, to sing as best he could in this form, to allow himself close enough to see the way your eyes lit up whenever another bird landed on your outstretched finger.
xiao dropped to the ground, morphing back into his
human form. predictably, the birds cawed and flew
away quickly. he watched them go, his mind
contrasting it with how readily they flocked to you.
you…
he turned to the branch he was on, to the small almond piece left behind. the small symbol of your care, of how you recognized that he didn’t touch the birdseed and instead offered him your own food to eat. normally he wouldn’t lower himself to eating off the ground at all, let along bird food, but almonds weren’t awful and you seemed so happy when he ate..
xiao looked back to where you’d gone, to the sandbearer trees swaying in a soft wind.
he allowed his form to fall away and spread his wings, taking flight on the same breeze that urged you along.
perhaps he’d forget his orders for a little while longer, if it meant he could spend that time with you.
perhaps he’d forget his orders for a little longer, if it meant he’d get to spend that time with you.
#m1d : [chats]#m1d : [secrets]#sibling anon#bird!xiao shenanigans#btw he’s pretty in character#you can add a dash of a ‘mysterious calm in the air’ if you wanna be certain but he’s oretty pretty good as is#also! let it be known that i too like fluff!!#< been meaning to write a piece based on hugs ppl would give for a while now#dilucs near the top of the list which is kinda funny considering the shit i’m (hopefully) gonna pot tonight#post* whoop#post-valentines day sadness#this got WAY too long#forgive the old format i wasn’t gonna try n find more photos of liyue than i already have#writing this was hell. thanks tumblr. i really appreciate you glitching out my drafts.#i’m trying to save my writer energy to wrap up dilucs piece COME ON I DONT NEED THIS#had to write this on the website version of tumblr ugh. dislike.#anyway debating adding this to the masterlist bc it’s… so nice…#the vibes….. immaculate….#TUMBLR DELETED HALF MY FUCKING WRITING WHEN IT HIT POST WHAT THE FUCK#THIS IS WHY I WRITE ELSEWHERE THEN COPY PASTE TO THIS HELL#FUCK. IT WAS SO GOOD. WHY.#the last half of xiao’s part at the end is the bad shittier version of what i had written originally#i am bitter. but i guess i’ll have to die mad abt it.#ugh.#it cut off the last paragraph AGAIN WHY#hate. >:(#also mushroom anon send help one of my mutuals is doing a letter event in celebration of his 1k what do i do#ok it’s his 800 celebration but STILL HELP#whatever fuck it i’m done trying to get this to work#fuck it we ball
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A very close friend of 3 years posted the good omens season 2 'am i the asshole' post and somehow i didn't know it was them when i saw the post
I KNOW THEIR TWITTER HANDLE
Anon... are you... trusting me with fandom secrets rn?
#anon how did you feel when you found out#i would love to meet 'crowley"#i mean fred#it would be so fucking funny if you were 'A' in the comments#blog#ask#good omens#good omemes#definitely feel free to use the gif to get your anthonys#good omens fanart#aziraphale#btw i see you all going from 'crowley uses reddit' to 'crowley CREATED reddit' and this is all thanks to fred
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how would you react to engie losing his beard completely? :>
"I think I'd hate it."
#ANON IM GRABBING YOU THIS WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY TO DRAW#thank you for the genuinely fun question#emotionally xyz mercs#tf2 soldier#rp ask blog#team fortress 2#tf2#incoming signal#emotionally clumsy soldier
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danish slaughterhouse fanart
#emil.txt#anon thank you for asking me about my danish slaughterhouse rant :] i will answer but writing is hard#have this while you wait that i drew for theymadecatsgreen's reading of it on insta live#mini rant here though is just that i hate that its treated as the funny haha denmark murder fic thats so bad its good while people fail to#even acknowledge the genuinely triggering shit in the fic?#also the fic did so much damage to denmarks characterization in the fandom#anon you have opened a can of worms i just need to collect my thoughts#i am NOT maintagging this#i will admit denmark calling norway the 2012 equivalent of 'discord kitten' is so fucking funny#i didnt give him his beard or red hair bcus my Denmark would never#the danish slaughterhouse#tdsh
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There's this newish "euphisim" young people in my country came up with. When someone says "I'll take him to the roof" means they're gonna have sex with that person. So my sister was watching me play Y3 and when she heard "Mine's taken him up to the ruff" she was like oooo he's gonna- and I was scream laughing
HEEEEEEEEEELPPELJVLAKJ PLEAASSE I WOULDNT HAVE SURVIVVVVEDD
#fave#snap chats#IM FUCKING CRYING THATS SO UFUNNY AND UNFORTUNATE#WHY DOES THAT TRANSLATE TO 'we're gonna have SEX' WHAT LANGUAGE IS THAT#LIKE I GET IT IF YOU MEAN LIKE. SCHOOL ROOF?#cause i can hypothesize kids going up there to be foolish and whatever butALERKVJLRK IM CHOKING#imagine if kiryu really did just go up there and daigo woke up and kiryu had to walk in on them making out#id fucking scream#god thats so funny anon thank you for telling me this beauty
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batman if he was autistic and lesbian
welcome to the blog
#THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY FOR NO REASON#making this my pinned for a bit. anon thank you i’m giglging way more than i shojdl at this
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If I got the keys to a mech I'd never fucking go to work a day in my life again. I'll take my fucking giant robot to the drive thru and say "One double cheeseburger, please" and they'll say "here you go, on the house for our favorite Char clone" and you can ignore that last part. I won't even pay rent, I'll live in my mech and it'll be way cooler than living in my car because my robot can kick ass and I can't fuck my car
this ask is great and I totally agree but when I fucking opened it to respond it has collapsed all your text vertically as if it was a poem?? anyways yeah I'd also get burger and fuck my mech too but also have you considered letting your mech fuck your car for like enrichment
#fucking baffled why did tumblr do this??#also yeah so valid for mech fucking tbh mechs are hot#idk what a char clone is i assume its something for Real Mech Heads alas i am just a poser#i like evangelion because im sad and gay and i watched like half a gundam series#anyways thanks you for the ask anon sorry this happened to it but its so funny#asks#anon
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My mom: we have Sappho at home
Sanpha at home: 🥸
The way I spat coffee all over myself anon I hope you are happy 💀
The way I scrambled yesterday to add a sapphic goddess to the ancient pantheon and I COULDN'T COME UP WITH A NAME and I grabbed Sappho like
"YOU. HELP ME."
#ouroboros-if#interactive fiction#anon you are so fucking funny#why wasn't there a sapphic goddess already you may ask? there are NO gods apart from the nature deities hsjsjdhdjdndhcjfb#some on the fly world building was necessary 💀#though there *is* a god for mended clothes so akshshdbdhd. IT'S COMPLICATED#and the celestials but they are in a league of their own#anyway where was I 💀#thanks for the ask it made me chuckle 😂💖
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Ok quick question, can you like, confirm you’re genderfluid? I know that I should technically already know this since I’m your overseer and we are connect to you, but I’ve been headcanoning you as a boy this entire time. Have I like, been misgendering you?
You give your overseer a long, bewildered stare. "Yes? I am genderfluid? What do you—why are you asking me to confirm I'm genderfluid?"
#ANON THE ASK IS MUCH APPRECIATED BUT THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY#I'VE BEEN LAUGHING AT IT SINCE YOU SENT IT#YES THEY'RE GENDERFLUID#any and all pronouns are fine for them! my default is just they/them for simplicity#i encourage you to get weird with their pronouns as well!#as a point of clarification: IWSY innocence is genderfluid but they're fluid between wholly non-human genders#so technically they're never a boy. but also like. it doesn't matter that much#just have fun with their gender and pronouns#god can you fucking IMAGINE#iterator has their overseer pop up and go 'can you confirm your gender to me' WHEEZE#in all honesty though this is like. part of the reason why this is written in second person#with wind i took the no pronouns route#i needed something else for innocence that would also eliminate the need for me to choose pronouns#and it wound up being writing in second person. pronouns simply never come up#so any pronouns you already use for them are technically applicable!#unparalleled innocence#whispers for innocence#innocence won't save you#rain world#every time i think about this ask i start cackling. holy shit it's so funny. thank you for sending this anon
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i must ask who’s your fav in lovebrush chronicles
HAHA OH GOSH im asking myself that very question!!!!
OK OK. OK. i think this is the first otome i’ve played where i just. don’t have a strongly defined favorite?? but my favorites (plural) rotate between alkaid, ayn, and sometimes lars depending on the day!! i also really like clarence. i’ve def warmed up to him. but i will say, considering i typically love the serious but secretly dorky love interests, im a little surprised he hasn’t taken me in a death grip by now HAHA
i think the only one i don’t care about too much right now is cael but also he’s buckwild insane and i think that is just really funny. i hope he kills more people.
oh also. i. kinda genuinely adore the characterization of the mc. dare i say she's more of a fully realized character than rosa at times? and the localization for this game is really, really enjoyable. the characters actually feel much more human than i’m used to in otomes, so that is REALLY nice. i like how often i can make fun of or be mean to the boys it's so funny.
i also like how i can make the mc and other girl characters my profile pic :)) ive had ehlonna as my profile pic for weeks now ehe
#asks#anon#addy rambles#lovebrush chronicles#i LOVE being mean to the boys on the social media art posts. so fucking funny. bullying ayn is a hobby ok#HAHA THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!!!!!#i kinda wonder who other artem girlies like......#bc artem is sometimes like a weird mix of alkaid and clarence i can't explain it
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