#this is a joke alrite? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

suffering-and-happy-about-it · 4 years

Text

I Like Surprises Too (Sriracha, Part 44.)

Series description: A problematic college student gets the worst summer job of the ‘83 - Jim Hopper, the Chief of police in your hometown will have you as his secretary since his old lady Flo has two months lasting holiday. It was agreed so Hopper could keep you far away from all the trouble.

Part Summary: Diane was gone just right after she came for a visit, but there was still more to go through.

A/N: I just wanna be done with the series, tbh.

Word count: 2.4 K

Tagging: @nemodoren, @missdictatorme, @ysljordy, @creedslove, @hopperlover, @btchsm, @rita-lean

Master list: H E R E

Series playlist: Jim Hopper 😠

IMAGE SOURCE

For the first time forever, you were afraid to come home. The last time you were so terrified of opening the doors was when Hopper drove you after you've puked all over his beloved Blazer. It was logical for you not to come home - you were standing in front of Harrington’s house, more specifically in front of a building where he had rented a flat, and waited for Robin to open up the door for you.

She came there only in her t-shirt and pajama shorts, her eyes were still glued together by sleepers and she was looking... Awful. Both her and Steve were extremely worried about seeing you at their hour in such an unholy hour, but she ran down to open the door for you. And the worse it got when Robin noticed that you had mascara all over your place, your face was colorless and your hands were shakily holding three cups of coffee and doughnuts from a Dunkin' Donuts. It was obvious that you and Hopper argued.

Without questions, Robin took you in and helped you with the sweets you brought. Steve was pleased to see you, so after he hugged you, he took off your coat and offered you a shower, getting you some of his clothes. Which was something so nice of him that you cried again? And the boy was wondering what did he do wrong.

"Spill the tea, sister. Let the council judge you." - Robin said, already spread all over the lazy chair while eating one of the donuts. So, you talked - about Diane just appearing out of nowhere with a kid, about Hopper drinking... And the small part when you shouted at him that you're pregnant.

"Oh, fuck." - Robin sighed, sitting straight by the end of the story. - "Oh, fuck indeed." - You answered, drinking your cup without caffeine. Steve was looking at you with a shocked furrow. - "You're pregnant? I'll be an uncle?" - Suddenly, he was on his feet, walking around the room. This was the reaction you expected from hopper - pure happiness.

"Robin, you and I will be the best uncle and aunt in the Hawkins, I tell you. Is it a boy or a girl?" - He sat next to you, his eyes shining at the question. Jesus, the boy was something, but you loved the energy. With tears in your eyes, you smiled at him and shook your head.

"I'll tell you as soon as I know something, deal?" - You asked back, having steve falling into a rant about taking the kid to restaurants, swimming pool, teaching them to play basket, and how to pick up girls... And Robin was just laughing at that. In the middle of his ranting, you've fallen asleep - night shifts were a bitch. It was quite funny when Robin and Steve was co-operating to get you into his bed, whisper-shouting at each other because Robin thought you'll bang your head into the doorframe every second. In the end, you were there, safe and sound.

It was around midday when Hopper called the if they have seen you. Eleven reported to Jim that you hadn't shown up the whole day, so Jim rode his daughter to your mum's - so she wouldn't be home alone since it was fall break starting.

Since Steve would tell Hopper all he wanted to know, because that boy was a little bitch, Robin told James the most innocent 'no' of her life before promising she'd call him when you'd appear at their place. You got up around two in the afternoon, smelling something Robin was cooking. Steve was nowhere to be found, presumably being at his shift in the VHS store.

"That looks good." - You hummed and realized how hungry you were. Robin nodded at you with confidence, serving you a plate of her risotto. - "I should go home, shouldn't I?" - You asked silently when you had half of the plate inside, having Robin look at you carefully.

"I kinda wanna tell you you can stay here... But you should go home, yeah." - The girl fixed a few strands of her hair. - "Listen... This isn't a thing about which someone calms down in a few days. This is a baby on its way. A new life you and he created. Even if you'd keep him in the dark for a little longer, he'd get to know eventually. You'd got bigger, you'd have swollen feet and Hopper isn't a dumb guy at all. So, go home, wait for him, talk to him. You'll make it work, at least I hope so." - Robin supported you with the purest tone you've ever heard. - "And if don't, we and Steve can help you with the baby. He's a damn good babysitter." - The girl tried to cheer you up once she saw other tears in your eyes. Geez, these hormones were doing things to you, didn't they?

Soon after the delicious lunch, you set on your way home. What should you expect? Him yelling at you? Will it be a heated argument full of bad words? He already told you that you were acting like a bitch into the phone, so it was quite possibly the words will get harsher from face to face. Was he looking for you when you were gone? Or was he at home? He was sure worrying for you, you knew Jim wouldn't be calm about you just disappearing even for the morning...

It was quite a surprise to find his car missing in the driveway. He had a day off, or at least you remembered so, so it was quite surprising to finding the home completely silent. El was at your parents' and you let her stay there - it wasn't a good idea to call her to come home before talking to James about the whole baby thing.

You were nervously looking around the house, calling out his name to see if he isn't hidden somewhere out there, but the house was empty. - "Well, fuck." - You whispered to yourself. It was an hour later, an hour of nervous waiting later, when you heard him pulling onto the driveway. And at that moment, it didn't seem that you were sitting in the kitchen for an hour. The panic inside of you intensified almost instantly. Every sound coming from the outside was strumming through your ears like fucking Chinese gong. The stopping of a car motor, the opening of the door, and James' frantic footsteps as he realized that you were finally inside the damn house. You would swear that you heard him talk to himself, but you wouldn't swear that.

The front door opened in the following minute. This sound made your heart stop. Were you ever so scared? No, damn, this was horror at its best. Dear Lord, you closed your eyes for a second - your palm gently rubbed your belly, please don't let us argue. And don't let this relationship end. It would mean the world to me. There was not a single percent of you being religious, but when you saw Jim's shadow in the main hall, you suddenly started to pray to every god you ever heard about.

When he saw you sitting at the table with your nose red, he almost started the conversation by telling you that you look like Rudolf the reindeer. Yet he rather just put his bag down and went to hug you with a great force. One of his palms ruffled your hair as he took in the scent of your perfume. It was just one day and Jim was already going crazy from not smelling it. - "I was lookin' for you everywhere. Jesus fuckin' Christ." - The man pushed you off his chest just so he could palm your face, looking you in the eyes. Your face was already falling into an emotionally unstable expression as you started to cry almost immediately.

"I was worried to come here." - And there you were. There it was. The quiet, basically meowling, tiny voice which indicated that you're not only terrified but guilty as well. This side of you was not to be seen too often. It was possible for the second time Jim was ever seeing this behavior. You shut up, listened, and you were able to say 'yep, I've fucked up too, I've messed up, let's just talk about it'. And honestly, it felt very good. - "I didn't want to argue, again. After you called me a bitch... And the stuff I've said." - You almost rolled your eyes out when Jim chuckled at what you've said, yet he was quick to smooth your shoulders to calm your down. - "We've argued way worse than this. Come on. This was nothin'."

"But the matter is something, Jim. I should've done it differently. I should've told you maybe... Before Diane came here. But I was shitting myself with fear." - The way you clung onto him was almost heartbreaking. It was incredibly sweet, yet done out of fear - it was the fear of losing him. - "I would be terrified too." - The man mumbled into the back of your head, closing his eyes. If I would be pregnant, I mean. Tellin' you would be the worst thing that had ever met me, probably." - The man whispered. This speculation made you grin.

Sure, you two could argue. You could yell at each other for hours to come to no avail. You could tell each other rather nasty things, be very mean and angry. Or you could turn it into a joke. A happy occasion if you will.

Sure, having a baby was far from an actual joke, but you got what Jim was trying to do. He wasn't the most excited to do it again, mainly because of the everlasting fear regarding Sara, but he was happy that he was going through this by your side. A kid. Wow. A damn kid.

"I'm sorry for gettin' so drunk. I fucked that up." - The man whispered as he moved strands of your hair from side to side. - "Sorry for acting like a hysteric bitch. I should've trusted you with Diane. And I failed." - You answered after a while, sighing quite loudly. Carefully, you tiptoed to kiss him, closing your eyes as you leaned into the kiss itself.

"'s alrite. I was probably more confused than you, baby." - Jim's thumbs gently smoothed the sweet spots under your eyes, massaging your skin in the process. He was unbelievably gentle with you. As if you could break under his fingers any minute. - "You acted without thinkin', but yeah, I can be a fuckin' asshole sometimes." - James admitted sincerely, having this small sweet small light inside his eyes.

This man has admired you for some time now. And the more time passed by, the more years you've spent together, the more love he had in himself. It took him a few more weeks to adjust himself to the whole pregnancy situation. And yes, occasionally, there were some misunderstandings and small arguments between the two of you, but would you be a married couple if you didn't have these?

Diane called here and thereafter her visit, still climbing on Jim's nerves and getting inside his head, but these calls lasted less and less time every time it repeated. Eventually, she stopped calling completely. And since then, there was no doubt in your mind about James and his intentions.

What about the other acknowledging that soon, you'll be a mom? Eleven was over her heels. The girl always adored small kids. She loved spending time with them and every time she met some downtown, she stopped just to chat with the kid or to make faces at them. Having a younger sibling almost sent her to another dimension.

Mike and the other kids were regularly happy. Kids were cool... Unless they were younger siblings. Lucas had miss Erica as his sister while Mike had Holly, of both the brothers had to occasionally had to take care. Both the boys realized that over time, Eleven will have to spend her time with the small kid too. And they would most likely have to look after them.

Yet the young gentlemen were so cavalierish that they managed to overcome themselves and to promise you that they'd sometimes look after the kid. You managed to seal a deal with them, pre-planning them as occasionally, fully paid nannies - although your concern about what they'd do with the kid was growing more and the time as you heard what they plan to teach the kid.

Over time, as expected, you grew larger and larger. You grew so much that you had to move your seat in behind the steering just to fit there. Any of your coats and blouses didn't fit you anymore and over the time, you needed to buy some preggy jeans. When you had a worse day than you usually did, which you could recognize based on your back pain, Jim tried his best to help you with the household - he could do dishes, do the laundry and when he was feeling courageous, he tried to cook something. It was nice of him, yes, but he didn't know how to cook at all. Even Eleven could cook better than him. Sometimes, when you woke up from your slumber, you just saw black smoke coming from the kitchen and you knew what James was up to.

Slowly, the time when you couldn't go to work anymore came by. It wasn't that you were sat down on a wheelchair all day or something - but it was quite hard to run around the hospital and to interwiev kids all day. But that didn't take anything from your charming personality - James made sure he behaves or he could be schooled like a small kid. You didn't care how long would it take, but you would have an elaborate lecture all night if needed. It was one silent, calm night when it came.

#jim hopper #jim hopper imagine #jim hopper x reader #james jim hopper #robin burke #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things hopper #stranger things netflix #jim hopper stranger things #eleven hopper #jane hopper #jane ives #mike wheeler #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #max mayfield #will byers #joyce byers

7 notes · View notes

bottomyg · 5 years

Text

jin: *sneezes*

bts: *ignored*

jungkook: *sneezes*

bts: OMG BLESS U ARE U ALRITE MAY GOD BLESS UR SOUL BB-

jin: ..[am i a joke to u?]

#bts #bts fake texts #fake texts #texting #texts #bottomyg #jin #seokjin #jeongguk #jungkook #discrimination

42 notes · View notes

eveningclouds · 4 years

Note

i completely agree w u like u dont have to like liam- i dont- but some ppl are crossing a lot of lines with "jokes" and what not and dont realize that he's a real person yknow? anyways i hope ur final went well

agreed! u don’t have to like someone (& liam has done a lot of things that are very unlikable, to say the least) to still be...compassionate? esp since a lot of the things tht people have said (i might have been one of these people too) impact real-life people other than him, too - like jokes ab alcoholism or his fatherhood...maybe HE won’t see them, but people who might b affected by those jokes might see them yk...(& thank u!! ❤️ hope ur doing alrite too)

#like the liam payne memes to me...were a little much tbh #just in how rapidly ppl decontextualize & warp images until they're stripped of their original meanings/situations #felt a liiittle dehumanizing? to me personally #even if some of them were funny #mail

1 note · View note

nummsworld · 5 years

Text

I am fine, I really am. Just don't look me in the eye and say it's going to be alrite because it's not. I try not to cry, I focus on correcting my smile and jokes I make. And if anyone tries to give me hope , I just cry , because that tiny hope is also gone , now I know it in my heart that it never was and it never will. Talk to me about weather, work or fashion or world . Don't make me talk about myself please. Please! I am trying to lock up , hold back my tears, I am trying to contain my pain. Just don't look me in the eye and ask about life. Don't tell me it's going to be alrite. I don't want to believe again, I don't want to hope again....😭😭😭

Sat, 7 September, 12.04 pm

3 notes · View notes

sinha-ri · 5 years

Text

*cLaPs*

Valdis and Lily- Another story/reminder for myself which i need to learn how to properly tag to remind myself and find this because I'm sure i lost one on Oliver.

Lily was just recovering from nearly dying at an actual clinic. Upon hearing/knowing this, the miliary was like "Wasn't that the one dude who's really good at halberd and did some hunting and sht?" And went to scout him. They were like "Hey, we heard ya almost died and your weak as sht rn with no home, no money, no weapon, your basically broke asf, so we want to help you. Fight for us, and we will give u all that AND protect you from the person you just ran away from. If you deny us, well we'll throw ya back with them."

And Lily, just fckin tired, was like alright fine. But whatever you just called me, dont anymore. My name will be Xavier. Before they were able to look at him well he cut above his eyebrow to hide his marks. He was like, I need about a month to get better.

They were like, a month? Bi- have you seen yourself? And your long deep cuts? We gonna give u 2 months to recover, after that you're gonna train with this Knight who is a general and you'll be his Lutenit. He was like alrite, my one request is to go visit this place to make me a weapon, i don't want yours. They were a lil salty but ranted him that.

2 months later, he's still weak and recovering but trains with thee Knight, who is Valdis. Valdis is like "Why do they want him? He cant even run without looking like he's gonna pass out and he keeps dropping his halberd. Why is he using a halberd? They literally dumped an emotional mess on me who gets frusterated way too easy and wont even let me touch him." Because he was given literally no information about him other than the military wants him trained, so he's like aight.

Eventually he feels like a total duck when Xavier (Lily) snaps at him and his wrists are bleeding cause his wounds are opening again. This is when he knew...he fucked up. So he tries to go a lil easier on him now knowing he's injured.

Months later, he did it! Xavier is a semi fuctioning killing machince who's wounds have healed. He's still quiet as hell, eye bags that indicate he hasn't slept for god knows how long, and terrible eating habits, but he can tolerate Valdis. Valdis then proceeds to try and make him less tense and just fckin relax, so he always jokes around with him and slowly tries to get him used to touch again. After a while tho he's like...o sht..am I gay for him?

So one day he takes Xavier to drink, he actually drinks which surpeised Valdis, but god did he get drunk real quick. Some lady was flirting with them and Valdis was like, Ay Xavier why dont ya hit her up? And so the lady takes him and then like, 1 minute later she comes rushing out and p issed and Valdis goes into the room like, wtf did u do?

And they basically had a conversation where Xavier was like "I've never done it with a woman cus im gay asf" and Valdis is like "Oh."

Another time skip and Valdis tries to get touchy (occasionally poking him, holding his hand/arm, brushing his hair with his hands) with Xavier and notices how he lets himself. Then they get a lil more intimate and kiss- and that goes on for a while without either of them actually saying the love each other (except Valdis but in his very weird Knight way)

Xavier is like "I'll date you but...you have to listen to anytime I tell you to do or not do something" and Valdis is all for it and respects anytime he says no, especially to way more intimate things because now that he knows him better, he has a better idea of what he's been through and how he's still mentally and physically recovering.

After a while of dating and Valdis trying to get to 3rd base but backing off anytime Xavier says nah, Xavier is finally like "Alright- I dont think i can do this anymore. I cant give you what you want despite being patient as hell and I'm just a wreck rn who isnt ready for a relationship and also any of us can die at literally any day so maybe after the war going on we can date again." And hes like, terrified by how Valdis will respond. HELL YA HE'S SAD/UPSET, but he doesn't show it and is like "Alright, if thats what ya want. But will ya still let me hug/comfort you?" And Xavier is just like daww alright, just cus its nice.

Weeks later, that's when a big battle/the last battle happened and Valdis lost sight of Xavier but only heard the news that the enemy finally surrendered. They made him stop and pull back before he can even look for Xavier. He hoped he got back okay, but when he got back he got the news that Xavier died. His weapon, some of his armor, and his body was missing, but someone witnessed when he was stabbed and they saw how badly he bled and fell.

Valdis never got his second chance, but knew how much Xavier was hurting anyway, so it got him 👏 fucked 👏 up. He hoped he was alive, but wished he wasn't because of that.

And when he found him again, he was so excited and grateful and he looked better! He was smiling, laughing, looked well rested and looked completely healthy! Valdis would only hear him laugh once every full moon, while here he was just so happy and relaxed and calm with a new haircut and everything.

But now, he was married and went by the name Lily.

He was ofc supportive and showed it, but it just fuked 👏 him 👏up 👏even 👏 more 👏because he was the one that got away due to terrible timing and circumstances.

Thoughts, questions, comments? (All/any appreciated)

#facts #and this is why i feel bad for valdis #there was also a part where lily had to explain to valdis he was asexual #that was great #valdis #why cant mobile have a read more option #so yall dont have to see my long a ss rant

4 notes · View notes

lustingtc · 5 years

Text

3rd May 2019

Hatsune Miku says trans rights!

Anyways

I had a dream. A dream about that dumb dog man 😔😞

It was really weird??? Like it was a dodgeball game and I was just wearing my uniform n yeah,,, 😳😳😳😳

It was...let’s just say he noticed my blue underwear YiKeS 😓😓 It’s bc I fell in like a ditch and he helped me and then he like... his eyes. Boy pussy. Yeah. That happened 🤢🤢🤢 but like he was also like “Uh. No. That’s weird.” So,,.

My mans ain’t a pedo in my dreams🤧

💝💞💓💗💖💘💕💝💞💓💗💖💘

Anyways ACTUALLY getting into school n after tutor,,,

So bc it was non school uniform day,,. We waited to see T’s fit.. 😰😰😰

It’s honestly... considering it’s HIM

That fit... absolutely 🤭😩😭🤤💯💯

WE LOVE!!! 1 MAN!!!!

He had a white T shirt on and then he had a white button up shirt over the top of it,,, n like,,, the 2 top button where undone and like 💝💞💓💗💖💘💕

GIRLS!! WE BE FEASTING!!!!!! 🤪🍽

Alas I went to maths after that wonderful meal of a man

Do dogman. His fit? Brown. Sweat patches. It’s is... not,,, a,, look,,, 😳😰

But we touched elbows 🤪✌🏻😚🤙🏻 wedding is Sunday!!11!1!1!1!

Me and O managed to convince him to let us play Kahoot!! He was like “What do we do now?” Bc we had 20 minuets let and me n O were like “KAHOOT!!! KAHOOT!!!!!!!!” And he just looked at us and was like,,, alrite 🤧🤧

So of course as soft stannie #1! I put my name as ‘uwu’ uwuwuwu

N he’s reading the names and THIS MAN. THE WORDS THAT COME OUT OF HIS MOUTH OHMYGOD!!!!!!

“You-woo”

Fuck what did this man say?? FUCKING WHAT!??? Anyways me and O lost it,,,

Also some kid asked where in the town Dogman was from, but he’d come to our city for university,,

Turns out he’s from South London :OO very exotic!!! 🤩🤩🤩💯💯

So I was done with tht shit

Omw to English 🏃‍♀️🏊‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♀️🏊‍♀️

I was walking towards the door right

Got my hand on the hand thing that you pull to open the door, right. 🖐🏻🚪

This mother fucker. I see that mother fucker T on the other side of the door. I SHIT MYSELF 😰😰😡😡😡

My brain be lyK xd

“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Do I open the door? Do I let him open the door? What do I do? Should I open it??? What if I fall into him bc I stub myself on the door?? What do I do??”

So... I open the door

“Aw shit, here we go again.”

He opens the other door... like. I’m pretty sure he was gonna open the door I was opening an sO idk???

The big question:

Does opening another door means he hates me with a passion?

Maybe? Most likely... 😔😔😔

But then this lower year bitCH comes SKRRRTTT past me. Almost knocking me off my fUCKING FEET!!!!

But she was like “SIR!!!”

So. Another bitch on the hit list. 😎🗒

Saw the fat bItCH AGAIN 🙄🙄👋🏻👋🏻

He was on break duty (3 this week. What a sacrifice.) but,,, he was talking to an annoying kid so...😶💍🚫

Me and P are back together...

As much as our very dramatic awful horrible dirty disgusting blood flinging breakup was a thing

She redeemed herself.

Her fit was VeRY CuTE!!!!! uwuwuwu

We did this game and not to flex but I got our team 2 of the 3 points so, really, we’re both putting so much into our relationship 110% the wedding is on sunday 😌😌🤞🏻🤞🏻💍🎉🎉🎉

But we didn’t win so we had to stay a minuet behind bc that was the rules.

And this girl got lowkey pissed jsksksk and she was like “AFTER WE HELPED YOU THAT ONE TIME!!!” And P was just laughing sm 💝💞💓💗💖💘💕!!!!

And then she said something and P was like “PLEASE!!! Anything but that!!1!1!” And !!uwuwuwuwu!!! She is just the CUTEST AWEE!!!

Me? T? Yeah I saw him for about 2 seconds before spanish. Yeah he’s cute. Yeah I’d get run over for him

Yeah I miss him :(((((((((

I want my boyyyy!!! ONE INTERACTION WITH MY BOYYY 😩😩😩😩

Like I miss him sm it’s not even funny. I miss his voice and dumb jokes and his wonderful baby smile!!! I miss him so so so much,, I just want to give him all love :-( 💝💞💓💗💖💘💕

#teacher crush #tc #teacher crush community #tc community #Z #dogman #P

1 note · View note

coralsgrimes · 3 years

Note

How did it go from “omg shipping real people is CRAZY and CREEPY” to people shipping him with Amita and Sujaya here….

Anyone want to become the token shipper for Ben and Danielle? She does call him Shadow Zaddy. And she’s actually single. #Banielle

Ok so I decided to make a list with pros and cons of Benny and them other people we talked about today! THE SHIPS!

Bulianne; so far the only confirmed one and over, dead and buried as of now, hated by absolutely everyone in the fandom and their mothers. Has an official theme song - Here Comes The Sun. Pros - twin flame left the door to Benny's real life/persona ajar and was constantly giving us shit to do/talk about during pandemic and they deff deserve one another! Also finally confirmed to them old fans that Benny is not gay and has the straightest bad taste in women... Cons - we gonna need a bigger boat for that x.x CORALSRATING - two and a half wishes out of three

Boriana; also mostly hated by the fandom, workplace romance. Courtesy of 👑! Pros - made Benny ugly cry and hump old TV in his MV, will fiercely protect him when boy gets his raya age settings below 18, cause it's them girls fault they are underaged! Cons - she is only 2% goat milk, according to twitter, and I like my goat cheese full fat ;c CORALSRATING - 11% Spanish and 1% it won't end up well

Bessie; current work affair, eternal lovers and forget the twin flame sunshine bullshit cuz Jessie is the sunshine and probably the female pirate too! Pros - they could sell more Shadow and Bone me Daddy seasons with their love, shippers make cute joint headstones fan arts for them, Benny likes, we laugh. Cons - Jessie could do way better than Beyyn, their shippers terrify me, older step-brother vibe from Benny, The Activist Stink. CORALSRATING - six seasons and a movie

Bemita; we make the shit as we go! some are for it, some are against. Overall quite niche. Pros - she has very nice shiny hair and some Bulgari jewels! Cons - Benny clearly ain't the biggest fan and thinks himself as having the high ground, per usual. CORALSRATING - chub-chub, because it's never gonna happen

Beaya; I made this one! Pros - she is an underrated beauty and the most age appropriate for Benny in the Hungarian wilderness. Cons - the name I made up for them is apparently a model of running shoes ;c CORALSRATING - momma would like this one

Belahan; boys do like to work out together *Lucille Bluth would wink here*, lotsa comments #thenotificationssquad... Pros - DL would be happy? maybe? they seems to be into the same women (see certain NY model...) Cons - they were working out together but Benny still has them noodle legs, what about Alex and Julian? CORALSRATING - two Michelin star aubergines

Banielle; credit to ye lovely muffin! Pros - she is cute and IRISH!!! Cons - she went to Trinity (screeching noises) and has wrong idea about what kind of man should be called zaddy. Apparently is single which is a big turn off for Benny Boy. CORALSRATING - grand

The Secret Bristol Girl; she is absolutely cute, redhead and a lil bit hippie. Math teacher who also likes astronomy OR astrology, accounts vary! Has a cat, probably a Siberian one <333 Pros - close to momma, she is a secret as Benny likes. Cons - has a cat and probably not ready to be Benny's baby momma yet. I think I made her up to be too good for our boy ;c he does not even deserve a made up girl x.x CORALSRATING - one DM sighting

Ok that's all for today! What other pairings ye want me to judge? What others should I add? That was so fun!

#ben barnes #bulianne #boriana #yesss #i was soaking up in the tub while making it xd #nice evening #my legs hurt I walked too much ;c #but them views!!!#emmmmm i dunno if i need to add it but #this is a joke alrite?

3 notes · View notes

wildestschemmentis · 6 years

Note

I never realized you are a hardcore HP fan. I love ur wynonna earp headcanons, do you have any good headc abt HP?

Oh i will die loving this saga despise the fact J.K Rowling went the way she went. uh i do have a lot, mostly of romione and their kids but i’ll try to talk about everyone.

- Hogwarts changed so much that now the hufflepuffs are the bullies - there’s a lot of places in hogwarts with the names ‘’potter’’, ‘’weasley’’ and ‘’granger’’ in it and the next gen cringes at it but they feel very proud of what they did- victoire and teddy started dating in their sixth year bc of a slugh party (teddy doesn’t care about genders at all)

- contrary to the popular belief in the fandom i dont picture rose as being bookworm like hermione, no, she is very much like ron, she eats all the time, swears all the time (’’Honestly, Rose, i will ground you until you are 21 years old if you ever talk like this!’’ says Hermione on day), and she is good at quidditch, makes into the team as a chaser on their third year.

- Hugo is gay. The entire family is okay with this and Ron who is a very teddy bear and protective father is like ‘’alrite but no man is good for my son’’. Hugo is the male version of Hermione, always anxious about homework and trying to follow the rules but he has fun when everyone hangs out at hogsmeade. he is ravenclaw and has a crush on the captain of their quidditch team.

- Ron still works in the shop with George and since now is canon that Hermione becomes the Minister, he is the granger-weasley residence a lot more and loves to cook. Word gets around and one day they are at Hogwarts and a Hufflepuff says Ron wears the panties in the family to get into Rosie’s head (she has a temper), Ron doesn’t understand it and when Hermione explains it to him he just laughs and says ‘’you bet you ass i am laddie’’.

- Romione are so in love it hurts and Rose, who is very into tv shows, compares them to Peralta and Amy all the time.

- Harry and Ginny are living in Godric’s Hollow now and he rebuilted the Potters house but no one lives in there.

- James is as bad with girls and Harry was and Ginny makes fun of them all the time, Lily is also a Ravenclaw and it’s on the quidditch as well, Albus doesn’t like quidditch but is good at defense against the dark arts, specially when Harry retires from being an auror and starts to teach at Hogwarts.

- Arthur and Molly bought a lot of houses in ottery st. catchpole and all the Weasleys live in there in a lot of Burrows of their own.

- Fred II follows the rules as much as Hugo and his father is kinda sad about it but in the other hand Percy’s kid are the new troublemakers.

- Astoria, Hermione and Ginny are always having a girls night out bc why the fuck not.

- Someday the daily prophet notices that Ron and Harry are a couple and Rose compares it with Frankie and Gracie, it becomes a recurring joke in family reunions.

- Draco still doesnt get along with them all but it’s okay with Scorpio and Rose dating. Ron, on other hand, is still protective and Hermione too, but she pretends she’s okay with it so Rose can confide on her.

- The Grangers are a huge part of everyone lifes now. Hermione doesn’t rule them out since Australia, they know everything about the wizarding world and they even were allowed to watch Rose playing a match one day at Hogwarts.

- Also, Hermione is Hermione J. Granger Weasley now, she keeps all the names and Ron changes it when they renew their vows cuz Rose told him about Beyoncve and Jay-Z

- Everyone calls Harry the Uncle Who Lived

- Rose and Scorpio only get alonge after their fourth year.

- You know who else is gay? Charlie. When Hugo comes out, also in the fourth year of Hogwarts, he gathers the courage to talk about it with his family, but he marries a muggle and Arthur couldn’t be happier.

- I like to think Lily is bissexual bc i had a lot of bi vibes from Ginny

- Hermione is very KinkyTM and teached a lot. I MEAN A LOT of stuff to Ron. She keeps her hogwarts uniform, he keeps his quidditch one.

- Theres a ball at hogwarts on their fifth year and James ask Lavander’s daughter out, she’s as needy as Lav-Lav was and everyone makes fun of him about it, Ron is the only one who gets it and its like ‘’dude. don’t let her give you a necklace’’.

- There’s a room in the granger-weasley residence full of books for Hermione (and Hugo of course), it was Ron who builded it with the help of Harry.

- When the trio fights someone always ask if they are broking up (’’I should be so lucky, says Ginny, who started the joke)

- Albus is assexual and has a owl who looks exactly like Hedwig

- At some point of her early teenage years rose wants to be an youtuber (’’You can’t, people do magic all the time in this house, i am the Minister Of Magic, for god’s sake! says Hermione)

- Ron is bad with technology and so is Harry

anyway i could go on forever about this

#hp next generation #romione #hp #longpost #headcanons #non wynonna earp related

18 notes · View notes