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script-nef · 4 years

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Fluff alphabets | Tsukishima Kei

Others: Hinata, Kageyama, Oikawa

Category: fluff

Affection: How affectionate is he? How does he show affection?

Tsukishima isn’t all that affectionate, but tries to make sure you know he loves you.

Like helping you with studies or buying you books which you commented on before. It shows he pays attention to everything you’ve said, even in passing.

From a salty and seemingly uncaring boy, that’s one of the best things you can ask for.

Baby: Does he want to start a family?

Have you seen this guy? He’s the type to despise babies and claim they’re nothing but crying and whining migraine producers.

If you absolutely want to have them, then he’s going to have a long talk with you. He doesn’t think he’ll be the best dad due to his personality but is willing to try if you’re absolutely adamant on the idea of kids.

Only one though. He really doesn’t think he can take more than that.

Cuddles: Does he like cuddling? How often does he like hugging?

If you ask for one, he’ll definitely hug you but not without blushing. He’s not very used to physical contact with others but slowly learns them with you.

Most of his hugs are him just towering over you and pulling you into his embrace. He’ll hug you whenever you’re feeling down or lonely, as if to say “I’m here for you.” Tsukishima may not seem like it, but he’s pretty attentive of your moods and conditions.

Date: What is a typical date?

You both love learning things, so dates are usually to informative places like museums, aquariums and art galleries. You would sometimes act as a curator and explain things in your specialty to him while he does the same.

You also go around quizzing each other on random exhibits like “what era do you think that was made?” and the person with the lower score after hours of walking around has to pay for lunch.

Experience: How much has he dated before? How does that reflect in this one?

He’s had plenty of confessions before but you’re the first one he accepted. It was a drunken confession after being friends for a year but his brain was clear enough to accept.

He’s not experienced and that added to his default personality, he had a lot to learn. Communication is key in a relationship and he also searches up what kinds of things a boyfriend should do.

You laughed when you found out he does that but it’s honestly very cute and adorable.

Fight: Do you fight often with him? How does it usually end?

Fights are common and incredibly messy. Lots of shouting and structured arguments from both sides because you’re both smart as hell and you gotta put those debate skills somewhere.

It ends once you both calm down and have a clear head.

Once you got heated up and yelled so much that your vocal cords got damaged and spat out a tiny bit of blood. Which made him stop immediately and run to the kitchen to get you some warm tea and then apologised.

Gentle: How does he treat you?

Verbally? Tsukishima is scathing. No sugarcoats, this boy is salt incarnate with a tongue sharp enough to cut through Wall Maria. You, of course, are the same. In university, everyone called you two “that fighting couple” because you guys were constantly bantering.

Of course, he treats you well because he drinks his ‘respect you lover’ juice. It’s hidden under a couple of mountains of salt, but this boy cares about you the most and constantly worries about you.

Hand: Does he like holding your hand? How often?

He often holds your hand outside so that he knows you’re not wandering off. He also likes comparing his hand size to yours and teases you saying “you’re so tiny” as if he wasn’t a 190cm titan.

He also holds your hand during movies, especially scary ones, to help you calm down and not be frightened so much. It sometimes turns into a competition to see who has a stronger grip which alleviates some of the tension.

Impression: What was your first impression of him?

Absolutely terrible. This was expected with his aloof personality and sharp remarks. You took a history class together in university.

You had to work together for a project and wow, things got off to a rough start. He was having a bad day and accidentally took it out on you. Of course, you didn’t back down and spat back insults as well. So shit went sideways real quick.

Your initial impression got better as you worked together but you still bring it up to this day. It makes him feel guilty but you laugh it off and say “who would have guessed we would go out?”

Jealousy: Does he get jealous easily? What sets him off?

A lot of other people ask you out because they either don’t know you’re dating him or doesn’t believe it. He had a reputation during university for being incredibly smart but also rude. They just can’t believe you’d go out with him.

But he doesn’t get jealous because:

1. You’re not his possession and can hang out with anyone you want

2. You’re dating and love him. Other people can love you but he’s the one with you at the end of the day, so who cares.

Kiss: Is he good at kissing? When does he kiss you?

Tsukishima is not fond of deep kisses because he doesn’t find the idea of exchanging saliva that attractive. However, he’s fine with any other ones.

He especially likes forehead and top-of-the-head kisses. It’s the easiest physically and comforts him as well.

Love: Who said “I love you” first? And when does he say it?

He said it first, half-awake. It was your weekly movie night and he was so tired from all the assignments and projects that he drifted off to sleep during the movie. It was near the end so you waited until the ending credits rolled.

Thankfully you were watching it in bed, otherwise you’d have to wake him up because you can’t carry him to bed. So you shifted him a bit to lay him down but he woke up from your movements.

He was super disorientated but the second he saw your face, he mumbled “love you…” then went straight back to sleep. He doesn’t remember it though.

When you told him about it, he refused to acknowledge it happened.

Memory: What’s his favourite memory with you?

When he came back home to see you sing his favourite song in the living room. It was his favourite song since childhood and brings up a lot of memories.

He put it on a lot and you like it too. He knows you don’t like singing in front of other people, but the fact that you’re singing it with ease and hitting every note perfectly reminds him how much time you spent together.

You blushed when you realised he came in but he just sat down next to you and said “keep singing, it’s good.” He smiles every time he hears it now because it reminds him of that time.

Nickname: Does he give you a nickname? Do you have one for him?

If you don’t reach his height, he calls you a midget. You could literally be 0.5, no wait, 0.1 cm shorter than him and he’d still taunt you with it while laughing. (You, shaking your fist: “This bitch…”)

In retaliation, call him beanpole or sequoia with a scowl. It doesn’t really affect him and he’ll be like “Oh, so you do know how tall I am compared to you.” But he loves it if you’re smaller than him because you fit into his embrace easily, and it feels like he’s protecting you.

(I also have this dream of calling my s/o “Tsuki” as in the moon which means “I love you”, from Natsume Souseki’s translation.)

Open: How open is he about his feelings?

Not really. He wouldn’t profess his love for you like Hinata (“Do I look like that single brain-celled volleyball maniac?”) but neither would he be completely silent on it.

He won’t say it out of the blue, totally unprompted, but once he’s comfortable and relaxed with you, it would slip out. Mostly in the form of a whisper, just so only you can hear his words.

PDA: Is he fine with PDA? How far can he go?

He doesn’t really like it but will, reluctantly, participate if you want to. His limit is just hand-holding, though. Hugs are once-in-a-blue-moon surprises in public.

He once had to live through the embarrassment of Hinata shrieking and gaining attention when you kissed him which ruined the entire PDA thing. His glare to the orange boy would have flayed him alive if you didn’t step in.

Quirk: Habits or something he does which is unexpected?

Is a history buff, but not one of those war ones. More like the ‘Age of the Dinosaurs’ ones. It’s obvious that he likes them but it’s to the point where he can literally recite facts about any of them. It gets more and more intense since he works at a museum now.

Whenever he finds a new fact or anecdote, he sends them to you so you can “become educated”. If you find some, text it over to him and he’ll say “thanks”.

Relax: What activities do you do with him to relax?

Baking. Strawberry shortcake, to be exact.

You made one for him when he told you that it was his favourite but it ended horribly because he said it tasted terrible. Even though others said it was fine.

So after that, he always insists on baking with you to “keep an eye on you” and gives you constant feedback (read: instructions and naggings). But it’s worth it in the end because the product is his happy smile.

(You later find out he only said it was terrible to make an excuse to spend more time with you, but in his Tsukishima version.)

Support: How supportive is he of your dreams? What do you do for him?

He would, of course, be 100% supportive of anything you’re thriving for. But he’s different to others in the sense that he’s more grounded and realistic, so that’s the type of advice he’ll give you.

If he sees you’re getting stressed or strained over a project or anything like that, he’ll ask you if it’s really worth it and propose the idea of just leaving it. He doesn’t like seeing you push yourself so far.

You come a lot to the museum because it has a café with an amazing hot chocolate. He comes in between his breaks and has a snack while you talk to him about the displays. He helps to set up a lot of it so you always say “It looked amazing!” and it cheers him up every time.

Talk: What does he like talking about?

Tsukishima is a man of few words, but he loves talking to you. He says it’s because you’re not annoyingly ignorant (*cough* Kagehina *cough*) and he can hold an intelligent conversation.

Talks range from what you did today to societal concerns to what you learnt today. He likes seeing you become passionate about the problems you have or calmly recount all the mishaps you went through that day. You always seem to have an action-packed life.

Umbrella: What’s his favourite weather/season?

Ones of those incredibly cloudy and grey days, possibly raining slightly. He likes studying to the pitter-patter of rain on the roof of the house.

He also likes it because it means he can share an umbrella with you on the way home. He purposely bought one with a large span so you can walk home together with no shoulders getting soaked.

Vaunt: Does he like showing you off?

Nope. He never feels the need to flaunt you off to others because he doesn't see the need for it. It’s not like showing you off to others means he cares more about you or anything like that.

He feels more comfortable knowing your little habits and lifestyle to himself, because it reminds him that he knows you more than anyone else.

World: Where does he take you for vacation?

Somewhere close by, a place where he knows the geography well and also knows you’re going to like. Tsukishima doesn’t like going to foriegn places because of language barriers and mishaps which might not end well.

In the first place, he doesn’t like moving all that much so his ideal vacation will be something like a rented cabin and not backpacking around. If you want to do something physical, he would research all about it and think of every possibility which might happen.

X-ray: What happens when you’re injured or sick?

Immediate response is a snarky remark on how you should have taken care of your body. The entire time he’s nursing you, it never stops. Sometimes you snap and tell him to get out, but he never does.

When he gets hurt, he won’t call for you, claiming that he’s fine and that it’s not life-threatening. Yamaguchi will probably text you about it along with “I didn’t say this to you! Keep it a secret!”

So you sneak into his house and make some warm porridge or chicken soup. He says he hates being coddled but in reality, he loves it.

Yearn: How much does he miss/pine for you when apart?

He does miss you, but not all that much. And won’t admit it either, he’s too much of a tsundere for that.

Tsukishima doesn’t understand why couples cry as they have to leave to another city or country when it’s only for a short amount of time. He’s going to come back soon and he knows that your love for him and his love for you won’t disappear in that short span of time.

ZZZ: Does he have sleeping habits?

Always has to put on some type of music when falling asleep. Of course, it’s usually quiet classical or lo-fi songs and even then, the volume is turned way down.

It basically serves as BGM while he mumbles to you about his teammates and museum works. And you reply with bits of your day as well.

For some reason, your voice works better as a lullaby than any music.

#tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #tsukishima imagine #tsukishima kei imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu!! imagine #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu!! headcanons #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#tsukishima #tsukishima kei #fluff #alphabets #request #gender neutral reader

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enna-of-the-stars · 3 years

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This is Home: Chapter 1

Fandom: Natsume Yuujinchou Word Count: 5.1k Rating: General Audiences Summary: Natsume Takashi has never really had a place where he could settle down and call home, but that was before the Fujiwaras came along and bundled him away to a little town called Yatsuhara.

A ficlet about Natsume first moving in with the Fujiwaras and learning to break the habits that he's built over the years from constantly terrible relatives. Also, the Natsume Protection Squad develops instantly the moment Natsume walks into class. It just happens. That's it, there's no going back, the class just adopts him and Nishimura will fight anyone and everyone that will hurt Natsume. Part II of the “Rainbows Only His Eyes Can See” series!

CHAPTER ONE: Welcome Home

When Natsume first arrived at the Fujiwara household with nothing but a box and the clothes on his back, he was shifty, a nervous bundle both cautious and wary. He held tightly to his single box, body seemingly wilted under the bright morning sun. Touko and Shigeru had walked into the house first; Shigeru padded upstairs to make sure the room they were going to give to Natsume was well and truly ready, just a final check in his words. Touko, on the other hand, had drifted to the kitchen, already preparing tea and snacks for the three of them to enjoy together. The door remained open, an invitation.

Natsume shifted from one foot to the other, hands tightening around the little corners of his cardboard box, not daring to take another step further. The open door loomed before him, taking him back to the past, far into the realms of a time Natsume wished desperately not to remember. Kanegawa-san and his wife were kind enough, haven taken him after all the other distant relatives in that are threw him away. They were kind in a way that many before them had never been, letting him go to school and giving him food on an almost consistent basis barring he hadn’t done anything wrong, again . But every now and then, when Natsume would point out another guest that had arrived from the closed window and pulled curtains from above the kitchen sink, Kanegawa-san would stare at Natsume with the strangest look in his eyes. Over and over, Natsume would point out the new guest. Eventually, enough was enough. Natsume was to remain outside after school until the sun set, or else he wouldn’t be allowed to eat dinner. God, couldn’t he just be quiet and stop telling all those lies?

With the door large and gaping before him now, in front of the Fujiwara household, Natsume hugged his cardboard box closer to his body. The door was open, it never was before, not like this; it was never this inviting, this welcoming. Not with Kanegawa-san, never after that. Was this an invitation, a well and true meaning invitation into the house? Can I…? Natsume thought, before he shook his head roughly to rid himself of such an overly luxurious thought. How stupid could he be to possibly think that the door was left open for him, and wasn’t just some accident reminiscent of the Fujiwara’s slightly older age compared to the rest of the relatives. So instead, Natsume waited, patiently holding onto his single box that was worn and practically collapsing onto itself with use. He couldn’t afford to bother the Fujiwaras the very first day they brought him home after all; not after they’ve been so kind, so caring to actually desire, to actually choose him. He couldn’t possibly—

“Takashi-kun?”

Startled, Natsume snapped out of his reverie and blinked owlishly at the image of Touko standing at the open doorway while wiping her hands on her apron. His posture stiffened immediately, grip tightening on his box as he drew himself to full attention, shoulders tense and eyebrows bunched in a mixture of worry and fear, and could it possibly be… hope?.

“Are you coming in?” Touko-san asked, voice full of nothing but kindness.

“E-eh?” Natsume replied, blinking in confusion. Were his ears playing tricks on him?

“Oh, Takashi-kun, quickly come in, come in! You’ll catch a cold standing out there all day!” Touko said. She then turned around and called up the staircase. “Shigeru-san, can you come down and help Takashi-kun with his things?”

Panic suddenly shoves itself into the forefront of Natsume’s thoughts and he quickly shook his head, vehemently, hair flying from side to side. I should cut it, the thought suddenly comes to Natsume.

“Oh, are you sure, dear?” Touko asks, placing a hand onto her cheek with, what Natsume would eventually learn, her characteristic expression of contemplation and worry as Shigeru peeked his head around the doorway. A deep breath and a sudden pause. Touko’s kindness shook everything Natsume had ever known and he almost spoke, but then years of having a tight rope around his neck snapped him back into reality. The rule. Natsume’s forgotten about the rule. And with that, Natsume ducked his head down, covering his eyes with his bangs. Quickly, he bowed to Touko and Shigeru, before scuttling and banging up the stairs and away from the Fujiwaras. They, on the other hand, gave each other a look. Touko wrung her hands on her apron, hesitant in whether or not she should go back to check on the tea or not. Shigeru walked over to her, gently laying a hand on her forearm, a knowing look in his eyes. Touko nodded in understanding, glancing meaningfully at the stairs before returning to pour the tea and finish preparing the biscuit she was making.

Shigeru made his way up the stairs, each step light. When he peers down the hallway, it is empty save for his charge anxiously looking around, unsure of where exactly to go. At the sound of Shigeru’s footsteps, however quiet, Natsume whipped around, eyes wide and hands tightly wrapped around his box. It looked like the edges were caving in. Shigeru smiled gently, the way he would any other time, enjoying the warm summer day with Touko. He gestured towards the door on his right and he slid it open. The quaint little room’s soft morning glow illuminated Shigeru and cast a light shadow onto the floor. Natsume opened his mouth in an attempt to express his gratitude when he forcibly slapped a hand to his own mouth and shut down whatever he was going to say. Shigeru, perplexed, almost had a chance to ask what was wrong, but it was too late. Natsume bowed deeply, but briefly, and rushed into the room, sliding the door as quickly and softly as physically possible. Surprised, but not deterred, Shigeru knocked on the door after a moment.

“Takashi, do you need any help unpacking?”

A beat. Then another. Shigeru was preparing to ask again when Natsume’s voice echoed from behind the paper thin door, hoarse and wavering and so, so unsure, as if he was scared to speak.

“No, thank you, I’m okay. I’m sorry for the bother.”

Shigeru frowned, confusion flickering through his mind. What could Takashi be apologizing for? Shigeru thought, before offering up another question.

“Takashi, would you join Touko-san and I for some tea after you’re done? It’s green tea.”

Once again, it took quite a bit before Natsume replied; it was hesitant and strangled, voice horse from… was that disuse, Shigeru wondered. This time it was another apology and another quick dodge to avoid interaction, citing for some reason, that he couldn’t possibly continue infringing on Shigeru-san and Touko-san’s time. Shigeru, worried and moderately disheartened at Natsume’s insistence on avoiding him and his wife despite the fact that he wanted to give Natsume as much space as he needed, wanders back downstairs to join Touko in the kitchen.

On the table there were two mugs already full of steaming green tea. A third, empty mug of a different design was settled next to the clay teapot, ready to be filled at a moment’s notice. The dark wooden table was awash in glittering golden droplets of sunlight as the almost mid morning sun broke through the cloud of curtains and into the soft glowing atmosphere of the Fujiwara kitchen. Touko sort of grimaced, a weak smile coming to her lips, as Shigeru came in with a distinct lack of Takashi. In return, Shigeru merely replied by taking Touko by the shoulders and gently guiding her to a chair whilst rubbing soothing motions along her arms. She sighs and takes a sip of the green tea from her mug. Pulling out the chair next to her, Shigeru grabbed the forlorn newspaper lying in the corner of the table and proceeded to open it, setting himself to reading the news for the day. The two settled down, their worry slowly dissipating, but never truly disappearing; both wanted to give Natsume space, but still, they couldn’t help but want to coddle him and overrun him with as much love as possible.

Lunch time comes around, and Touko goes all out, with every one of her most coveted dishes on display and raring to go. She’s bustling around the kitchen, excited and ready to impress so much love and compassion into her cooking that even Shigeru would get jealous. Shigeru, on the other hand, is a steady presence by her side, assisting her in setting the table and washing whatever needed washing as Touko bustled her way through the cutting board and various other pots and pans. They’re a flurry, a storm of hands and food and plates and everything in between that by the time they’re done, the kitchen is not only spotless, but encased in a heavenly aroma of a lovingly cooked banquet fit for a royal entourage.

Shigeru quietly heads upstairs to call for Takashi. Touko remains in the kitchen, shifting plates and dishes of food ever so slightly to the left, then to the right, then to a little bit in between. After all, everything has to be just perfect for their new addition to the family.

“Takashi? Would you like to join Touko-san and I for lunch?” Shigeru asks very softly, worried he might startle Natsume. He’s careful in his word choice, not wanting to force Takashi into joining. Yet again, no reply. Frowning, Shigeru continues, “If you don’t mind ,I’m going to come in, Takashi. Please say something if you’re against it, I won’t if you don’t want me to.”

There’s no reply, so Shigeru slides the door open and on the floor, asleep with his head resting atop the cardboard box, Natsume was out like a light. He’s curled quietly around the box, head resting in his arms as he lays over the box. The soft sunlight drifting in from his window illuminates his hair a satin gold, flushed with color and saturation. The air is still and quiet, save for the soft breathing coming from Natsume, and the minimal dust that does linger in the room has turned into starlight; they’re glittering crystals of sun and gold and the room is awash with glittering crystal. It was beautiful.

Carefully, Shigeru kneels down next to Natsume, his hand hovering, hesitant on whether or not he should wake the sleeping boy who obviously needs the rest.

“Takashi?” Shigeru says.

Natsume doesn’t wake; not a single stir, nor sign of awareness. Shigeru gently places a hand on the boy’s shoulder, and still, no response. As quietly as he can, Shigeru stands up and silently opens the little closet with the futon. He lays it out, careful not to awaken Natsume. Once the futon is ready, Shigeru wraps an arm around Natsume’s shoulders and another under his knees and pulls him close, lifting the sleeping boy; he’s surprisingly light, too light , Shigeru thinks with a frown. With Natsume safe and soundly asleep in a futon, Shigeru fusses briefly with the blanket, unconsciously tucking Natsume in. He lays his hand on Natsume’s shoulder, just on top of the blanket and presses down lightly, patting down a few times in reassurance. It’s a reminder that Shigeru is there . He then leaves, closes the door, and lingers just outside the room before once again filing his way down the stairs back to the kitchen where Touko is waiting, anxiously wringing her hands on her apron.

She had just finished resetting everything, from the many various plates heaped high with delicious food, to the silverware and tea already steaming in the earthenware mugs. At the sound of Shigeru’s footsteps, Touko smiles and heads towards the rice maker to add the final finishing touch to the meal, which at this point had become a banquet suitable for any king.

“Touko-san, it looks like it’s going to be just us for lunch.” Shigeru said.

“Eh?” Touko replies just before picking up the third and final bowl to fill with rice.

“Takashi seems to have fallen asleep. Although the doctor said that he’s already recovered from his injuries, his body must still be tired, especially with everything that's changed. Let’s give him time to rest.”

“Oh, I see. Of course. It’s only right Takashi-kun would be tired.” And with that, Touko nods once and heads to the cabinet just next to the sink and starts pulling out tupperware. “Then the least I can do is pack some of this away in case Takashi-kun wakes up and gets hungry. After all, we have to put some meat on those bones of his, he’s much too thin for my liking.”

She fishes out one box for each dish, it’s almost the whole collection of tupperware at this point. Every clear box is piled high on the counter near and still, Touko pulls out more.

“Honestly, you wonder if they were even feeding him!” Touko huffs out, a worried frown on her face. Shigeru smile softens at his wife’s obvious love for this child. He comes to her side, a hand squeezing hers, before he grabs the remaining boxes that Touko can’t carry in her hands, and the two set them down on the dining table. In a somewhat silent, but comfortable few minutes, the food is all packed away and into the fridge for safe keeping. Just enough is left for Shigeru and Touko to enjoy a good heap for lunch.

There are oranges and reds filtering in the kitchen window, twinkling and drifting and swathing the room in the golden hour. The clouds are just perfect for sunset, built in a way so that each crystalline drop of water glistens and drips with color saturated in the way only nature could do. It’s a fiery sunset. The sky is aflame with the very same reds and oranges that fill the kitchen, except now as the night edges further and further into the realm of the awakened, blues and purples have started to wash in. Twilight drips and the world is balanced on the edge of both day, night, and all the things in between. But soon the overflowing oceans of blues overtake the day and the sky darkens momentarily before the stars wake up and wave at the inhabitants of the night. Touko sets aside another portion of food for Natsume and dinner passes without a word between Shigeru and Touko. It’s silent and quiet and the room is just filled with a worried tension. They go to sleep, Shigeru lovingly kissed Touko’s hands when they grasp at her dress to calm her. He whispers reassuring words that let the two of them sleep in relative peace, tightly holding each other, unconsciously seeking the other’s warmth and presence.

Natsume lets out a breath of relief; Shigeru had just left the room still thinking Natsume was asleep. Roughly, Natsume grabs at the blanket that had been neatly tucked with the utmost care over his shoulders and feels his chest tighten and his eyes burn. He closes them in an effort to keep the tears from flowing. It doesn’t work; they’re spilling over, flowing like a waterfall that increases with each blink. The world is crystalline and bubbly, the water obscures everything leaving only opalescent glass panes that cover everything in sight. When was the last time he received such… such kindness? He doesn’t remember. His chest tightens again and his breaths stutter.

Kanegawa-san, Yamato-san, Satanoka-san, and all the other people that had been given him, none of them have ever been this kind before. None of them could even make the sad attempt to try. Every house was just another place waiting for Natsume to make a mistake. Every step he took, every action he made was observed with eagle eyed stares just waiting for him to mess up, an excuse to throw him away to the next unfortunate soul that would be forced to take him in. Yamato-san left him in what Natsume eventually called the void, a room of nothing but darkness and shadows and creatures lurking in corners far above and far below. Save for school, Natsume wasn’t allowed anywhere but the dark room shoved away into the corner of the house separate from the family. He wasn’t allowed to speak, because everything that came out of his mouth was a lie. That’s all he was, they told him. A liar. But he wasn’t lying, really. And yet that wasn’t the truth. Natsume was a liar.

Satanoka-san was nice enough, just the bare minimum to keep from raising any sort of suspicion, even if Natsume’s reputation already afforded her plenty of leeway to do what she wanted. Satanoka-san let him stay in a room of his own, once again away from the family. She let him go to school too and gave him some hand-me-downs to wear from her own son. But the lies that came out of Natsume’s mouth almost daily became too much, and soon Satanoka-san’s husband would quickly and efficiently silence Natsume. How dare he speak such lies in this household? So Natsume learned that his voice wasn’t welcome here. He remained silent after that. The creatures he saw, the yokai that appeared he did his best to ignore. He couldn’t cause any trouble again, he’d have to leave. He doesn’t want to leave. But this and that and everything in between only seemed to make everything worse. The yokai were relentless, curious and eager to mess with the strange child of man that could see them. Yokai chased him all around school and followed him back to the house, trying to get a reaction from the strange little human boy that spoke to air. Windows broke the moment Natsume walked by them, plates shattered the instant he saw them, things fell apart the moment he touched them. And every single time it was Natsume’s fault. He was a stupid boy, a clumsy boy. An attention seeker, no good, delinquent boy. No one wanted him. No one wanted to keep him. How could they? The rumors traveled faster than the adults could pass him around. It was getting harder and harder to find a place that would begrudgingly take him..

Another name, another place. Indifferent faces and indifferent people. Natsume can barely remember them, but he remembers the rules. They’re ingrained in his mind and wound a tight rope around his neck, coiling tight and ready to snap should he ever step out of line. Don’t speak, don’t speak don’t speak. Don’t act out, pay attention, obey, stop causing trouble. He always caused trouble. Why couldn’t he be normal just like the other kids?

Natsume panics, sitting up all of a sudden. No, no, no nonono - He’s caused trouble again. Shigeru-san and Touko-san are going to be mad, they’re going to be mad, he’s going to have to leave again, he can’t leave he doesn’t want to leave he can’t lose everything again not again please don’t—not again I’ve messed up, I have to—

A choked gasp escapes Natsume as he bends over the warm and soft blanket that has pooled around his waist. Tears are flowing, streaming, cutting into his cheeks and soaking his hands. But his sobs are silent. The waterfall forgets to cease and the world wavers and shimmers. It’s forgotten how to breathe.

Fear and anxiety coursed through his veins and the world is obscured in a confusing kaleidoscope of fuzzy images and shadows and tears that won’t stop. It’s dark out and he’s cold and he wants the world to go away, leave him alone, never breathe for him again. Natsume lays back down in the soft—wait. Natsume once again sits up, panic grappling at his chest and tightening its hold. Oh god I’m on their futon, I can’t be using this, I’m not allowed to use this! He hurriedly scrambles out from under the blanket, No please, I’ve messed up again! I can’t… I can’t mess up! Sloppy and messy and full of regret and shame, Natsume hurriedly folds the futon as best as he could, no one’s ever taught him how, and shoves it towards one side of the room, unsure of where it came from; he’s too afraid to open any of the cabinets. He couldn’t possibly pry anything open knowing full well the moment he tries something will break. Even if there weren’t any yokai, he could feel it. Natsume would break whatever he touched.

Instead, Natsume shuffles to a corner, careful from years of experience to not shift the floors, to not make a sound, always close to the edge and heavy furniture, where the floor is settled and won’t creak. He curls up, back against the wall and knees drawn to his chest. Natsume messed up again. He’s broken another rule again. The tears start again.

The world fades once more.

“Shigeru-san, I’m worried. Takashi-kun hasn’t eaten a thing since he came home with us! Would you go upstairs and please make sure he comes down to eat breakfast at least. I don’t want him to get sick!” Touko exclaims, having set down a washcloth onto the counter top much rougher than she intended to. At the impact, Touko comes to herself and settles down, worry seeping into her shoulders. “Oh, oh dear, I’m so sorry, Shigeru-san. I didn’t mean to raise my voice like that.”

Shigeru chuckles and is instantly by Touko’s side, arms squeezing her shoulders in an effort to help her relax. She does. He’s gentle when he leads her to the dining table and pulls out a chair for her to sit in. He presses a kiss to the top of her head.

“Don’t worry, Touko-san, I’ll bring Takashi down.”

“Alright… I’ll finish breakfast!” Touko said, jumping up in a fit of excitement, her previous worry gone, and replaced by the intense maternal love she feels for Natsume. After all, someone’s got to feed the boy!

Shigeru smiled. Touko was bustling around the kitchen again, and what a sight she is. She’s a goddess of light, radiant in all her kindness and perfect love. Such a wonderful, wonderful woman, a wonderful partner. What did I do to deserve you? Shigeru questioned as he slips out of the kitchen and into the hallway leading to the front door and stairs. He pushes up his glasses, and allows himself a moment to blink away the emotional love he feels and calm down before he heads upstairs.

A soft knock on the door later, and Shigeru is greeted by a wary looking Natsume. His hair is roughly patted down and yet so obviously all tangled up. There’s dark circles under his eyes and gods… were they puffy? Had he been crying? Shigeru frowns unconsciously. Natsume suddenly looks down at Shigeru’s feet, hyper aware of the frown but not of the reason behind it. Another cursory glance and it’s obvious to Shigeru that Natsume had only just changed, the clothes he was wearing slightly askew. He notices threadbare patches and far too short sleeves. The edges of Natsume’s pants are frayed, probably from being stepped on over and over again.

“Takashi,” Shigeru said, voice holding steady at a neutral tone. Natsume flinches, and only seems to draw within himself even further. Shigeru’s voice softens at the sight. “Touko-san is worried about you, you haven’t eaten since the day before yesterday. How about you join us for breakfast? Touko-san’s made enough for threes.”

Natsume wraps his arms around himself and bites his lip. He looks everywhere except Shigeru’s eyes. Logic dictates that he should reply to Shigeru, but he’s not allowed to speak. Don’t speak, don’t speak, don’t speak. It’s been pounded into him almost as early as he can remember; and he doesn’t know how Shigeru and Touko wanted the rules. Normally, the adults would shuffle the rules around a bit, each unique to every household. But not speaking was always the first rule to come. Natsume shouldn’t speak. No.

He can’t speak.

“Takashi?” Shigeru asked.

No, I… I have to reply but what if Shigeru-san gets mad? It’s a rule! A rule! I can’t break the rules again… not again… Natsume’s thoughts are thundering and his heartbeat drowns out the noise. But it’s a chance, Shigeru has already been kinder than anything Natsume’s every had, so maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t get mad, and he didn’t seem mad the day before, right?

Natsume opens his mouth, voice wavering like the world around him.

“No, thank you. I’m okay. I’m sorry about the bother, Shigeru-san.” Silence follows Natsume’s words. He can feel the world tilting, a buzz has started and is only growing louder and louder in his ears. He’s messed up. He’s messed up, Shigeru is going to be mad, he shouldn’t have spoken shouldn’t have answered—

“Takashi,” Shigeru admonishes, suddenly acutely aware of the shaking Natsume in front of him. The tense shoulders, the tight grip on himself, as if Natsume is trying to keep himself from falling apart, everything comes into sharp focus for Shigeru. He’s gentle, when he lays a slow but firm hand on Natsume’s shoulder. “Takashi, please don’t think that Touko-san and I find you a bother.”

Natsume breathes in sharply at the sentence.

“We chose you, Takashi.” Shigeru continues in an ever softer, kinder voice. “We chose to have and welcome you into our family, we’re your family now. And I know that perhaps you may not have had the best experience with adults like us in the past, but I promise you, Touko-san and I want you to be in our family. We want to cherish you. We want to love you.” It’s been a while since Shigeru has said something akin to this, words of reassurance and emotional weight. He’s worried that maybe, maybe it was a little too much. But it was the truth, and there was no doubt in his mind about it.

A pregnant pause. Neither of the two dare to move. The air is still, but the dust floats and flickers. Morning has dawned and the sun frames Natsume from the back, shining and illuminating him until his hair glows gold and the air shimmers around him. And like a flower opening for its first bloom in spring, Takashi lifts his gaze, soft molten gold watery and wavering, filled with deep recesses of shadow and blindingly bright lights that, for a brief second, Shigeru worries at how overtaken those lights have become. But now is not the time for that. Shigeru’s hopeful smile brings out a hesitant one from Takashi and he takes a step back and Takashi takes a step forward, the two meet in the middle of a golden amber hallway. Arm firmly wrapped around Takashi’s shoulders and squeezing reassuringly, Shigeru can’t help but smile even wider and so much fonder when Takashi unconsciously leans into the touch. The two enter the kitchen.

Touko’s face lights up at the sight of both father and son and suddenly she’s bustling and setting the table; but not before she comes over to Takashi and firmly places her hands around his cheeks and pecks a loving kiss to his forehead of golden locks and sundust. Takashi feels the red hot flush come to his cheeks and the warmth of a comforting hand on his back and suddenly the world comes into focus.

A chair is pulled for him. A bowl of warm steaming rice and chopsticks are set for him. Another bowl of freshly made miso soup is placed in a spot at the table for him. There’s a place for Takashi in this house, this home . And Takashi is frozen in his steps, just pushing the boundaries of the kitchen threshold; and as he’s lead to his seat, Takashi can’t help but let out a little watery huff. Can I… can I really? An answer from above seems to arrive because Touko finishes with the table and gently grasps Takashi’s arm and pulls him to his chair, pushing on his shoulders to get him to sit at his spot at the table.

“Now, Takashi-kun, make sure you eat up okay? There’s plenty of food and your much too thin.” Touko said. “Shigeru-san, do you mind opening the window? It’s a little warm in here.” Shigeru moves to open the window and he’s just about to throw it open, to let in a cool morning breeze when Touko interrupts.

“Actually, do you mind waiting a moment, Shigeru-san?” Touko asked. He pauses and nods at her. She returns her attention to Takashi. “Do you mind if we open the window, Takashi-kun? If you think it’ll be too cold then won’t.”

Takashi sort of stutters, mind reeling at such a question. Why in the world would Touko ever ask him such a question? This was her home, her kitchen; she could do anything she wanted. Why would she ever ask an outsider like him? But something in him burst out without much input from Takashi. Like a lock shattering open, the scissors come forth and rip the rope tying his neck into a million, thousand pieces and fragments and the words that have been bottled for so long flow out and onto his tongue, igniting the air around the family with earnest hopeful phrases.

“N-no, not at all!” And with that, it seemed as if everything slid into place with a satisfying click. Shigeru amicably throws open the window and the world wakes up.

Soft and just right, the wind washes in like a tidal wave, cooling the kitchen and flooding the house. A euphony of sound enters not far behind; birds are chittering and chattering away in the trees and the sound of leaves rustling and bustling filtered in from the sink window. The clouds part and everything is glittering gold. Touko sits down across from Takashi and Shigeru takes his seat by Takashi’s side, both bathed in the sunlight, beacons in the dark. They shine bright, rays of light reaching out like wings, cloaking Takashi in warmth, and then there’s a path shining in front of Takashi, as clear as day. The first path to break away from the dark comes like the edge of dawn.

He carefully reaches out for it and comes into contact with the ceramic bowl and wooden chopsticks. Gems of color are piled into his plate, piece after piece from both Shigeru and Touko. When he looks up, there’s only smiles and fond looks of love that—how long has it been since he’s seen had such a luxury—engulf him in a fiery glowing warmth burning bright in his chest. Takashi takes his first bite. It’s color, it’s fire, it’s lightning like nothing he’s ever had before. The broken padlock holds nothing back as Takashi blurts this out; Touko laughs and Shigeru chuckles, they insist.

“Eat more, eat more!”

And Takashi does.

click here for chapter two

#natsume yuujinchou #natsume's book of friends #fujiwara touko #fujiwara shigeru #natsume protection squad #good family #loving family #healthy relationships #fanfic_enna #Rainbows Only His Eyes Can See_series #series_enna

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